


Give Yourself Over

by cadkitten, SakuraAme



Series: Give Yourself Over Universe [1]
Category: Dir en grey
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Accidental Voyeurism, Alcohol, Anal Fisting, Anal Sex, Anger, Angst, Biting, Blood, Blow Jobs, Burns, Choking, Cigarettes, Cumshot, Cutting, Desperation Play, Dominance, Drug Use, Exhibitionism, Explicit Language, F/M, False Accusations, Fights, Fluff, Hand Jobs, Holding, Homophobia, M/M, Maids, Makeup Sex, Masturbation, Multi, Mutual Masturbation, Non Consensual, Oral Sex, Other, Partner Swapping, Pegging, Porn, Power Play, Prostate Massage, Public Sex, Rimming, Roleplay, Romance, Rough Sex, Scratching, Self-Harm, Sex Toys, Sexual Roleplay, Submission, Swingers, Threesome - M/M/M, Unrequited Love, Urination, Vomiting, Voyeurism, Watersports, Wetting, cigarette burns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-17
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2017-11-16 05:22:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 92
Words: 674,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/535979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cadkitten/pseuds/cadkitten, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SakuraAme/pseuds/SakuraAme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The exploration of a relationship treading on dangerous territory. It could rip the band apart if it all falls apart wrong, or it could make it stronger as a whole. Which will it be? The tangled web of lust, emotion, and circumstance. Between the external moments, here lies the truth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There's a sister story to this in which we explore other members of the band beyond Die and Kyo, check it out, it's called Path to Acceptance. If you click on the "Give Yourself Over Universe" series link, it's in there!

These past few days had been pure heaven for Die. Everything he did and everywhere he went, he was floating on cloud nine. Something about actually having given in to his attraction to Kyo made him incredibly happy and upbeat. He’d been taking it upon himself the past few days to drop in on Kyo whenever he felt like it, just wanting to be close to him for as long as he’d be allowed.

The fact that within a two day time-span he’d managed to both admit to his biggest secret and tell Kyo he had more than just sexual feelings for him was something of a novelty. Die wasn’t exactly the king of relationships, but he seemed off to an honest start with Kyo at least. If what they had could even be called a relationship at this point.

Tonight though, he’d just requested the other’s presence, hoping he’d just show up at some point throughout the night. It wasn’t long before he got his wish, Kyo waltzing in, a smirk on his lips that Die couldn’t get over seeing there each and every time. “Hey, baby, miss me?”

Die smiled when the other came in, going over to him and settling down on the arm of the couch near him. "Of course I missed you. The real question is... did you miss me?"

Kyo looked up and grinned, reaching out to run a hand over Die's thigh. "Of course...."

He shifted slightly closer to him and leaned down, peering at the vocalist. "I um..." he stopped mid-sentence and pursed his lips a little and then leaned down toward him, pulling his blonde hair a little. "You know... you were so gorgeous on stage last night."

Kyo hummed softly, reaching out to try to tug Die into his lap, smirking. "Because I was thinking about you... and don't think I missed the little love affair you were having with your guitar. I almost wonder if I should be jealous."

Die chuckled softly and moved to nudge against the other's side. "Dude... I always have a love affair with my guitar. Sorry, but she's my first love and you've all known it for years."

Kyo laughed and hooked his arms around Die's waist, one hand stroking up and down the other's back. "I know...I guess it's a good thing I like to watch." He smiled slightly. "You don't know this but... I almost always come to watch you warm up... it's a guilty pleasure of mine I guess you could say."

Die turned his head to stare at the other, a look of shock on his face. "Wait... you're serious. You actually like to watch me play?" He pondered it for a moment. "Do I really make that epic of er... movements?"

Kyo smirked and nodded his head a bit. "I love watching you play. When I'm writing lyrics, I sometimes listen to your guitar to get into the mood." He looked up at Die, reaching out to run his hand over the other's leg. "And yes, your movements are quite epic, especially when you've gotten into it to the point that you don't even notice the crowd grabbing your pants and boots. I swear I could walk over and grope you and you wouldn't notice."

Die chewed his lip a little and then cracked a smile, leaning toward Kyo. "I have a secret. I do notice them grabbing at me... but I like it." He grinned at him and reached to pinch lightly at his jeans. "It's one of those things that... I dunno... let's say... it gets me off sometimes at night."

Kyo cackled and pulled Die closer, tilting his head to nip at the other's jaw teasingly. "Mm I see...I bet every one of them would cream their panties if they knew that." He laughed and pulled back to look at Die again. "So what else gets you off at night, sweetheart?"

He leaned in conspiratorially. "I bet it would get them off... and you know... the few that have ventured higher than maybe they should have... have found out just how much I actually like it." He shifted toward him. "I have lots of things that get me off at night... lots of terrible... horrible... dirty things."

He found himself licking his lips as Die leaned in and told him that he'd basically been felt up by a few fangirls, chuckling slightly. "Remind me to put a camera there next time. I'd love to see their reactions and yours...."

Die laughed, shaking his head. "Mmm... a camera would be perfect. The look on their face when they slid up, expecting flaccid Die and find," he gestured down, "this baby waiting on them... one of them almost fainted once. Only bad thing is... one of them told half the fucking fandom about it, too." He laughed. "At least she said I was big, though."

Kyo snorted and rolled his eyes, shaking his head. "At least they were nice about it." His eyes turned dark as he reached out and grasped Die's hips, murmuring softly. "Tell me the worst...it can't be any more horrible than my own."

Die slid off the arm of the couch and crowded into Kyo's area. "Mmm... well... let's see. I have... so many dirty things, I have no idea where to start. Let's see.... let's start small. I used to talk girls into wearing a strap-on for me and fuck the ever living shit out of me while I screamed like a girl."

Kyo grinned and let his hand stroke close to Die's crotch before pulling it away. "Mm you filthy boy...I love when you scream for me though I've yet to hear enough of it." He paused for a moment, shifting towards Die. "I doubt I could ever get tired of it..." He licked his lips. "So...what did those girls think?"

"They... well... honestly... some of them freaked out and the others did it with glee. The ones that freaked out weren't worth it." He wet his lips slightly and narrowed his eyes. "Lay it on me, Kyo... one of yours."

Kyo chuckled then bit his lip, considering. "Hmm...perhaps the most obvious. I like to bleed." He shifted and unbuttoned his shirt, trailing a finger over the numerous scars on his chest. "Some of these are not from the on-stage fits..."

Die shifted to reach and push his hand against his chest. "You thought no one noticed," he murmured, trailing a finger over his chest. "I noticed... and honestly, for a while, I thought that maybe you had an issue... in another way... but it never coincided with your... er... fits." He licked his lips and shrugged a bit.

Kyo made a soft sound as Die touched him, reaching up to cover his hand with his own. "Sometimes...it worked both ways. A release of pain as well as pleasure." He looked up and fixed his eyes on the other's. "It's not really something I can explain in words...I'm sure you understand that."

Die's finger paused over the worst of the scars and he pursed his lips a little. "Mmm... I do understand that." He ran his hand over him again and then patted him a little. "Let's see... dirty number two... oh... wow... that sounds bad." He winced. "Not that. Definitely not that." He shook his head. "Uggh!"

Kyo nodded. "I figured you would..." When Die mentioned number two, he couldn't help but laugh, shaking his head. "No, not that...ever."

Die thought about it for a minute. "Well... you know one of my big sins. Piss play. So... down the list from there... well... um..." he looked a bit awkward. "I like strange... objects... in me."

Kyo nodded at the mention of watersports, smirking slightly. "Strange objects in you? As in...cucumbers or are we talking things like Shinya's drumsticks?"

Die winced and held up a finger. "Um... let's say... I know how that last one feels?" His cheeks heated up a bit.

Kyo had to clamp a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing too much. "Oh...I can just imagine the look on Shinya's face if he knew." He chuckled a bit more than finally stopped, a smirk still on his lips. "I think I could enjoy that one though..." he sat there for a minute then grinned. "Think my mic would fit up there?"

"Hey! I didn't give it back." He made an odd little face and then shook his head a little, laughing under his breath as the other asked about his mic. "Mmm... well... I'm pretty sure it would. But then it smells... like butt... so.... yeah. Maybe not the best idea for something that goes near your face."

Kyo laughed. "Yeah but it'd smell like your butt and maybe that's one of my fetishes...." He kept grinning to let the other know that he was joking. "...Maybe I just like the smell of fresh ass in the morning."

Die swatted at the other and made a choking sound before laughing. "Hunny... wow. I'll be sure to fart in your face next time we have sex then."

Kyo dodged Die's hand and laughed until his eyes were watering. "Hey... I said ass, not farts... that's a whole other ballgame!" He grinned then ran a hand over Die's leg. "Seriously though... I guess it's my turn so..." he thought about for a minute, humming to himself. "Well, I really like cumshots... both doing and receiving. In the face, on the ass, stomach, dick, wherever..."

Die let out a groan and reached to gently prod him. "Cumshot... that's fucking hot, Kyo," he muttered. Leaning in, "I'll be sure to surprise you with a few sometime."

Kyo smirked, licking his lips, shifting in his seat a bit. "I look forward to it. Your turn baby... got any more dirty secrets for me?"

"Let's see... I get off on semi-public displays. Like doing it in front of windows or pissing in an alley. Something I could get caught and slandered mercilessly for... but... god... I've done some dirty-ass stuff in public places."

Kyo's eyes darkened slightly. "I can...help you with that. I like to jack off on the bus while the rest of y'all are still hanging out and drinking...except I do it right in the common area."

Die's jaw dropped and he let out a squeal of laughter, shaking his head. "Oh god.. tell me that night I kept asking if you had fleas that you were actually jacking off next to me?"

Kyo flushed the slightest bit and ran a hand through his hair. "Eh...yeah, actually...I was."

Die pumped his fist in the air and smirked. "Dude... I so knew it. I was just goading you with the flea thing because I just wanted you to admit it." He leaned his head back. "Mmm... wanna know my dirtiest event?"

Kyo snorted slightly, still a bit flushed. "Fine, I've admitted it." He let a slight smile play on his lips. "Yes, I really would like to know..."

He shifted and re-crossed his legs. "Well... so... you know during family values, how I kept disappearing at night? And some nights, the guys kept coming to look for me because I wasn't partying with them?"

Kyo thought back on a bit then nodded. "Yeah, I remember...but I never thought anything of it...I figured you were off with some chick or something."

Die started to chuckle, a sort of ominous sound for a moment before he calmed and then started to talk again. "So... well..." he leaned in in a conspiratory sort of manner, "I was doing stupid things with probably not so er....smart people. But the crowning glory was actually in like... I think it was Kentucky or something?"

Kyo raised an eyebrow, reaching up to tug a lock of the other's hair. "I'm sure you were..." He smirked a bit. "But go on..."

"It started with about seven... yeah... seven... beers, a couple shots of tequila, and well... um... a certain type of cigarette that isn't a cigarette." He paused and made a face. "Don't tell anyone about that part... yeah? I said I made some mistakes, that was one of them. But... well... right... story. I ended up in an alley, taking a piss. It took forever and by the time I was done, I was actually hard as a rock." He snorted a bit. "So I started to jerk off... in the alley... like a moron. I was almost done and this guy stumbles into the alley... with the same idea as me. And he ended up blowing me." He rolled his head to the side and held up a finger. "Wait on it." He waited for a moment and then dumped it, "Kaoru found us."

Kyo listened to Die's story, snorting softly. "You aren't the only one to ever do drugs..." He waved it off then listened to the rest, damn near choking on air when he mentioned Kaoru finding them. "Oh shit! Was that the night he was storming all over the bus and shit?"

Die wrinkled his nose. "Yeaaaaahhhh... that was my fault. He had no idea I was into being with guys and I guess it was too much of a shock for him. Aside from the fact that we were like a hundred feet from the parking lot..." he then held up a finger again. "Backtrack... that was the voice of experience. Give it to me."

Kyo shook his head. "Wow dude.... at least he was blowing you instead of the other way around..." He laughed slightly. "I think that might've shocked Kaoru more. Of course, he was probably jealous too. I think by that point, a few of us were pretty hard up..."

Die snorted and then shook his head. "Mmm... yeah, I know. I caught him more than once in a frantic match of dick and hand." He sniffed. "So... again... dude, you have to tell me. What was this on the drugs thing?"

Kyo chuckled. "I have too...he always acts super embarrassed too and I'm just like...we're both dudes, I get it." He shrugged then wrinkled his nose, running his hand absently over his chest. "Eh… well, you know back a few years when I was at my worst with the cutting and beating myself up on stage? Well, let's just say I wasn't in a very good place emotionally or mentally..."

Die shifted to lean on him. "Mmm... I can't say mine was anything other than stupid experimentation." He squeezed Kyo's thigh and then reached to cup his cheek gently. "Can I ask what it was... or is that too much?"

Kyo hummed softly, drawing Die closer. "At least you didn't get hooked." He contemplated telling Die then nodded. "It's not too much...at least not with you." He took a breath and drew up the memories that were still painful. "You remember that one chick I dated for a while? That I actually let move in with me and shit?"

Die made a little face, not liking the sound of that. It also spoke of the voice of experience and he wasn't sure that was something he wanted to know just yet if it was still a problem. But he didn't say anything or give any hint of it, just nodding a bit. "Yeah... I do."

Kyo nodded slightly and continued. "Well... she basically broke me... in so many ways but I was blinded or something and kept letting her grind me into the ground like an insect." He stopped there, frowning as a grimace worked its way on his face. Finally, he shook his head. "I couldn't take it after a while... drugs numbed the pain. Eventually though, I managed to crawl out of that hole." He glanced at Die, then away. "If I hadn't, I probably wouldn't be here..."

Die draped his arm over him and pulled him close to him. "Baby... I know you were all over her... but she was a mega fucking bitch." He made a face and pushed his nose against Kyo's neck. "And she hated us all."

Kyo huffed softly, moving his hand to run through Die's hair. "I know...I mean, I didn't then...but I know now. She told me as much. She wanted me to quit because y'all were 'tearing us apart'." He snorted and turned his head to rest against the top of Die's. "That was part of what helped me come to my senses."

The guitarist shook his head a little and then kissed at his earlobe. He didn't know how to smoothly get away from the other's topic, so he just did it in a very Die-like manner. "But she's gone... and... so is the habit... right?"

Kyo's hand moved to rub Die's back, making a soft sound at the kiss to his earlobe. He chuckled lightly and nodded. "Yes, to both..." He sat there for a moment, enjoying the closeness, not having let anyone just be with him like this in a very long time. "So... any more dirty little fetishes? Feet? Latex? ...Tentacles?"

Die shifted even closer, his mouth against Kyo's skin. "Many more. Latex... is in fact, one of them. I love dressing in my old outfits... and doing dirty things in them." He chuckled. "Electro-stimulation... sounding..." he shrugged a bit.

Kyo raises an eyebrow and smirked slightly. "Mm really now? Electro-stimulation is something I've never tried, but have always been interested in. Sounding is... amazing when I'm in the mood and all I can think about now is dirtying up your old outfits..." He licked his lips and titled his head slightly, fingers toying with Die's hair.

Die let out a laugh and shook his head a little. "I do some of the worst things to those outfits... I've completely ruined some of them. Utterly and completely ruined." He hissed out slightly.

Kyo couldn't help the shiver that went down his spine or the heat that pooled in his abdomen at the very thought, his voice coming out slightly hoarse as he whispered. "Tell me..."

"You remember the black booty shorts and the knee pads? That outfit?" He watched Kyo for a reaction first.

Kyo nodded his head, leaning back to look at Die's face. "Yeah...?"

"Mmm... well... first I got all kinds of hard, smeared the inside with pre-cum... and worked myself up until I jizzed myself... in the pants." He paused and held up a finger. "Did you know it's hard to get that out of PVC?" He shrugged. "But lube and worse...massage oil... yeah... not great to get out of it."

Kyo coughed slightly, shifting his hips as the mental image of Die in that outfit worked its way into his brain. "Damn....very...dirty."

Die arched an eyebrow at him and then chuckled. "Mmm... so... really... you like sounding?"

Kyo nodded, running his hand up Die's thigh. "Yeah...it's an intense feeling...I haven't done it much though, just a few times."

"What did you use? Actual rods or just random... things?" He leaned in conspiratorially. "I like it both ways."

Kyo smirked. "I bet you do....actual rods though. I didn't want to fuck anything up by using something random...at least not until I knew my limits."

Die smirked. "Wow... well... I guess we play by different rules, don't we? The ability to get the real ones because money's not an issue." He reached to trail a finger over Kyo's zipper, licking his lips a little and then flicking the zipper.

Kyo nodded then let out a soft groan as Die's finger moved over his zipper, putting pressure on the steadily growing bulge underneath. "What sort of random things do you use...?"

"Let's see... mmm... The back of a knitting needle... not the pointy end. Remember that metal pen set that Kaoru got us all like... years ago? Yeeeaaahhh... stopped using that as a pen about ten days after he gave it to us."

Kyo raised his eyebrow and groaned again, the thought only making his pants tighter. "You'll have to show me sometime... I'd love to watch you get yourself off with that..."

Die chuckled. "Let's see... what else. The back of a fork... with the plastic bit, a little bulbous on the end. A straw once... don't do that, it scratches and then it burns when you pee." He winced.

Kyo wrinkled his nose. "Ouch… yeah... I've gotten a little too enthusiastic before and it burned for a fucking week. Shinya thought I had some STD or something because he saw me wincing at the urinal."

Die laughed and shook his head. "Dude... it burns like it, I swear it does." He made another face and then shied away from Kyo. "Er... I mean... ah shit."

Kyo didn't even blink, just rubbing Die's leg lightly. "....which one?"

Die made a little face. "Gonorrhea. And I know exactly where I got it." He held up a finger. " _And_ , even worse, I passed it on to three people before I knew."

Kyo winced slightly and shook his head. "Glad you didn't give it to me. I've had jock itch and that shit was bad enough. I have been lucky in that department though."

Die ducked his head. "It was years ago. Not any danger of giving it to you... I didn't even know I liked men back then, hell didn’t even know it myself." He sniffed. "But ever since then I've been so fucking paranoid... I actually go and get tested, even when I'm not sexually active."

Kyo nodded, reaching out pet Die's hair as a way of reassurance, to let him know that he understood and it was okay. He wanted to change the subject so he decided on something that he'd been curious about anyway. "So when did you figure out you were into men?"

Die looked relieved to stop talking about his run in with STDs. He screwed up his nose a little and then dared to shift back toward Kyo again, hoping he wasn't some kind of contaminated, disgusting lump now. "Mmm... well," he murmured softly, "probably like... 2006?"

Kyo tugged Die a bit closer, turning his head to nuzzle at his neck. "Mm...that long ago?"

He nodded. "Yeah... that long ago. And the other thing was like 1999... just... so you know... it's.... been gone for a long time."

Kyo chuckled softly and shook his head before moving and shutting Die up with his lips pressed against his. "It's fine, Die. Relax. Even if you had AIDS or something...I'd still want to be with you. Okay?"

Die swallowed a bit and then sighed, flushing slightly. "It's just... it's not my proud moment." He sighed and rubbed a hand through his hair. "You're..." he glanced at him again, "really sweet, to be so accepting."

Kyo smiled slightly and leaned into Die's touch. "I understand...but I also understand that you were _and are_ a rockstar and that it can get pretty crazy with chicks and dudes fawning over you. Hell, all of us have taken advantage of it... just some of us more than others." He laughed lightly and tugged Die's hair.

Die made a little face and leaned toward the tug on his hair. "Yeah... well... truth be told... me and Toshiya had a running tab. ... And he won." He shuddered a little and flopped his head back against the other's couch. "You're telling me though... that you had some rockstar moments?"

Kyo had to laugh at that last statement. "Toshiya won? And here I thought it would've been you Mr. Lobster." He smirked then nodded. "Yup, I had a few... especially right when we were getting big."

Die snorted. "Hunny... his list was eons longer than mine." He pursed his lips a little and then nudged him. "Tell me this... can you still count how many people you've been with in your life?"

Kyo snorted. "I didn't know he was such a slut..." He laughed then hummed, thinking about it for a minute. "Well... uhm... not counting a few that I'm sure I don't remember... probably about twenty or so? Give or take."

"Mmm... I'm glad one of us can still count it. No idea about Kaoru, but Shinya has had enough girls to fill a fucking train." He flopped his head around on the couch again. "I... refuse to try to count. Not gonna work."

He laughed. "Kaoru's either a stud and has had more girls than you and Toshiya combined, or he's stuck in the closet." He watched Die flop around and huffed, shifting his position to lie down and yank Die on top of him.

Die yelped slightly and then just sort of rested on Kyo, his hands framing the other's face. "You know... you're... an amazing person." He smiled softly at him.

Kyo flushed and glanced up at Die, leaning up to peck his lips. "You're delusional."

"Maybe so." He pushed his nose against his cheek. "You accept my past... like it's nothing. Even my mistakes. You don't make me feel like trash... and we've discussed so much shit."

Kyo moved his hands to run over Die's back, humming softly. "I accept your past because you accept me and all of my... baggage. Even before..."  
He cocked his head slightly. "I always felt like... I could trust you."

Die smiled softly at him. "I've always accepted you and everything about you, Kyo."

Kyo just stared up at Die, smiling slightly. "Even when I'm incredibly anti-social and won't speak to anyone for weeks on end?"

"Even then... though I don't promise to not silently blow you when you go crabby-Kyo on us."

Kyo laughed. "You can silently blow me whenever you want baby..." He narrowed his eyes slightly. "...I wouldn't even care if you blew me on stage..."

Die arched an eyebrow. "Last concert we ever have. You're on. They'll all shit themselves and then I can turn around and scream **Yes, we are all fucking gay for one another. All these years, fuckers!** and you'll blow your load all over my face, right in front of them."

Kyo chuckled and grinned widely. "Alright, it's a deal... if, of course, I can still get it up by our last show."

Die snorted. "Please. Kyo penis will rise to the occasion always... it'd never leave a concert un-bonered."

Kyo let out his own snort. "You're probably right..." He looked up at Die. "Next show though... after... your ass or mouth, whichever comes first... is mine."

Die let out a growl, purposely pawing at Kyo and smirking. "Mmm... I love it... do it. And surprise me."

Kyo groaned softly and licked his lips. "I will... you don't know how many times I've come so close to dragging you into the nearest empty place backstage."

Die grabbed his shirt and pulled him close. "Damn right you're gonna drag me off. Just yank me into a corner and make me scream."

He shuddered and tugged Die's hair slightly. "Shove you against the wall... fuck you raw."

"Raw... maybe not raw." He smirked. "Lube would be great. Just a head's up."

Kyo snorted. "You'll take it however I give it to you...."

"Hey, I'd rather walk after, if you wouldn't mind. I'll walk crooked all you want. But not lubed hurts, man."

Kyo narrowed his eyes for a moment then grinned. "As long as your ass is limping back to the bus... fine."

He pinched Kyo's cheek and then chuckled softly. "I'll pay you back for it... I'll make you limp, you little harasser."

Kyo moved his head away, wrinkling his nose. "You could you know...." He coughed slightly. "It goes along with getting off on pain..."

"Ooohhhh-ho-ho-ho!" He shifted enough to yank the other under him and ground down against him. "Baby likes it rough?"

Kyo let out an, "Omph" at being flipped over then growled, arching his hips up. "Yes. When I bottom....I want it to hurt..."

He bucked his hips against the other, already feeling himself shamelessly getting hard. He let out a groan and moved down to hiss in his ear. "Oh... I can make it hurt, baby."

Kyo moaned lowly as his cock throbbed, his hands moving to grab and squeeze Die's ass roughly, his voice coming out in a growl. "Is that a promise?"

He moved to grab Kyo's hair, yanking it back and the then licking down his neck with a groan. "You... have nooo idea how much of a fucking promise it is."

He hissed and jerked his hips up, one hand moving to tangle in Die's hair. "Fuck, Die..."

Die eyeballed the coffee table for a moment and then grabbed the other and pretty much tossed him on the table in a rather unceremonious sort of manner. "Get your fucking pants off, bitch."

Kyo's eyes popped open and he groaned when he hit the table, a shiver going through him as he hesitated for about two seconds before doing what Die said and yanking his pants off, tossing them aside as he sat back on his elbows and stared at Die.

Die glowered at Kyo for a moment and then reached down to undo his zipper, letting his dick hang out. He reached to start to stroke himself and licked his lips a little, peering down at the other. "Make yourself hard."

Kyo groaned softly and trailed his hands down his chest, over his stomach and finally to his dick, wrapping his fingers around it and stroking lightly. It wouldn't take much to get him fully hard as he was already halfway there.

His eyes narrowed on the other's body, watching as he stroked himself. His own dick swelled in his hand, mostly from the sight of Kyo doing such things to himself. He wasn't sure how much he could wreck the other, but he was certainly going to try.

Kyo shifted on the table and licked his lips, dropping his hand to grasp his sac, squeezing it and rolling it in his palm before moving further back to brush over his entrance then returned to stroking his dick, his other hand going to tug harshly at a nipple.

Die let out a strangled sort of sound at the other's actions, letting go of his dick and immediately yanking Kyo toward the end of the table by his ankles. He smirked a little and leaned over him. "I love your dirty little ass."

Kyo let out a moan and instantly spread his legs more for Die, showing him everything he had to offer. "Then do something with it..."

He yanked the other's legs slightly and then slid between his thighs, leaning down to nuzzle at his neck. "You're the most amazing..." he let out a growl and then licked his hand and rubbed over his dick before pushing against his entrance.

Kyo brought his hand up to tangle in Die's hair, groaning lowly as he felt his dick pressing against him, spreading his legs more and pushing back, his hand griping the edge of the table hard as Die slipped in a bit "Hnng..."

He honestly couldn't believe he was doing this to Kyo, but it was happening. Right then and right there. He shivered a little and pushed in a bit more with a grunt. "Oh god... _so fucking tight_ ," he murmured.

Kyo hissed at the pain but his cock was throbbing, already leaking pre-cum as he forced his body to relax to let Die in. "Die...fuck...more." He shifted and tugged Die down, kissing him almost desperately.

Die pushed in as far as he could get without feeling like he was going to rip Kyo in half. He pursed his lips a little and bowed his head. "God... Kyo... oh god."

Kyo shuddered under Die, his body burning but at the same time it felt so damn good. "Fuck me, Die..." He rolled his hips up, moving against Die with a moan, pleasure and pain going through him.

He reached to grab the other's hips, holding him pinned against the table and starting to slam into his body, trying not to be afraid to force the issue and do it as hard as he could.

As Die started slamming into him, he let out a scream, hands moving to cling to Die's shoulders, his nails digging in. "Oh..FUCK!"

The sound of the other's scream set him off and he started to huff as he slammed into him. "Oh god," he whimpered out, shoving in so hard that the other was bouncing on the table.

Kyo bucked his hips up against Die's, panting harshly as he felt himself shifting on the table. He moved one hand to drag down Die's as he wrapped his legs around the other's waist, another inhuman cry spilling from his lips as the new angle caused Die to brush over his prostate.

"Oh fuck, baby, right there," he hissed out and then groaned as the table started to protest over and over.

Kyo snapped his hips up hard once more then screamed as his vision went white, his cock erupting between them in huge spurts, painting both their abdomens, his body clenching tight around Die as he came.

Die watched as Kyo started to cum, moaning as he continued to slam into him, making sure his nails would dig into the other's hips.

Kyo arched under Die as he came harder than he had in a long time, collapsing back against the table, not even caring as he heard wood splintering. "Die!"

Die shoved in and stilled, realizing at the very last moment that he'd forgone the condom. With a sort of shocked cry, he pulled out, spurting his cum out over the table and Kyo's thigh, whimpering slightly, his head bowed.

Kyo lay there groaning softly, a smirk playing on his lips as Die cum hit his thigh, reaching down to trail his fingers through the mess. "....God..."

Die let out another little huff and then shuddered a bit, realizing he had Kyo's blood on his fingers. He sniffed a bit and shuddered again. "Jesus Kyo... I think I broke us... and your table."

Kyo glanced down and shifted a bit to sit up, letting out a hiss as pain shot up his back. He kept moving anyway, dipping his hand down to brush over himself, pulling it back and looking at the blood with a laugh. "I think you may be right...but..." He shifted and tugged Die down, kissing him hard. "It was worth it..."

Die whimpered softly as he was yanked in and kissed. He blushed a bit and then chuckled. "Come on... let's get you in the shower now that I've... defiled you."

He laughed and finally stood up, groaning slightly as he wobbled towards the bathroom, dragging Die along. "I don't mind being defiled...as long as it's you." He smirked and pulled the other into the shower, leaning against the wall as the water heated up.

Die somehow managed to get his clothing off in the transition of getting from the living room to bathroom. He slipped in after him and then came to push himself gently against him. "You'll be limping for a while... and that was just rough..."

Kyo chuckled and looped his arms around Die's waist, nuzzling his neck. "Mhm... but I'll survive. At least we're not doing anything right now."

He smiled and ran his hand over Kyo's sides. "Yeah... good thing... for once."

Kyo hummed and turned them so the water would spray on them. "Mhm... the break won't be long though. Management will be up our asses about something or another soon enough."

Die grunted against his mouth and then shivered a little. "Truth be told... they're already bothering me. I ignore them."

Kyo nibbled Die's mouth and wrinkled his nose. "Ugh... I'm sorry baby... want me to go piss on their shoes?"

Die chuckled. "Mmm... delightful image, but I think they might like you even less if you did. Maybe not the best idea."

Kyo huffed and grabbed some soap, starting to rub it over Die's body. "Like I care... they think I'm psycho anyway..."

"Indeed, they do. But you know what... I love the general idea of it. They get all worked up and I love how you just stare them down." He pulled him close and rubbed his hand through his hair. "You're my sexy little psychopath."

Kyo chuckled, rubbing the soap up and down Die's back and over his ass. "Mm I'll be your sexy little anything you want..." He grinned and leaned up to peck Die's lips.

"Mmm... sexy little psychopath... I like the sound of it." He leaned in closer to the other, grinding a bit against his leg.

Kyo smirked, dipping his hands lower and trailing a soapy finger along Die's crack. "You do, do you?" He pushed his leg against Die's crotch, leaning in to murmur against his ear. "I could be psycho all over you...."

Die let out a groan and then shivered slightly. "Baby... please do go all psycho on me."

Kyo slicked his soapy hand up and down Die's crack a few times then turned him and finished washing him, paying extra, slow attention to his dick and balls before grabbing the spray and rinsing Die. He very quickly gave himself a wash then smirked at Die with an evil grin. "Bend over..."

Die yelped a little, but allowed Kyo to just go about washing him, whimpering a little. When he told him to bend over, he murmured softly, "Something besides the soap... soap burns like a bitch... trust me."

Kyo snorted. "I wouldn't use soap baby..." He smirked and knelt behind Die, spreading him open and running his thumb over his entrance before cackling slightly and replacing the digit with his tongue, running it the length of Die's crack.

Die's eyes widened and he gasped, gripping the ledge of the shower. "O-oh!" He blushed slightly. "I, oh, no one has ever... ah!"

Kyo hummed softly and spread Die open more, pressing his tongue against the puckered skin. "I've always wanted to..." he went back to lapping at Die's entrance then started pushing his tongue in past the ring of muscle, groaning softly.

Die pushed against the wall, whimpering softly and closing his eyes, his hips tilted back and his body warmed from the core with what Kyo was doing. He made an incoherent noise, surprised by how much he wanted this already, not having been this stupidly horny so many times in a row with past lovers.

Kyo slid a hand around to wrap around Die's dick as he wriggled his tongue as best he could inside him then paused and worked his finger alongside it, moving it in and out. "Mmm..."

Die let out a huff, his dick already hard when Kyo moved to start fondling him. He pushed back toward him and shuddered. "Oh fuck, dude... jesus FUCK."

Kyo groaned at Die's reaction, finally pulling back and spitting as much as he could on his hand before rubbing it over his own aching cock then pressing the head against Die's entrance, slowly pushing into him so as not to hurt him. "Ungh...Die..."

Die straightened up a bit to press against the wall a bit more and get more leverage. "Nggh," he replied as the other started to push in, his own dick flexing slightly.

Kyo leaned in and nipped at Die's shoulder before murmuring softly. "Can you handle it baby?"

He nodded, panting quietly, his eyes closed for the time being, not wanting to give himself too much to think about right then, trying to concentrate on not clenching up.

Kyo thrust into Die all the way, letting out a deep groan as the other's body sheathed him in tight heat. "Oh God...." He kept still for a moment, stroking the other's cock to distract him from any pain that there may have been. After a moment, he began moving his hips, one hand coming up to rest on the wall of the shower, his mouth attaching to Die's neck.

Die let out a grunt and reached back, pulling Kyo closer to himself and just hanging on for the proverbial ride. When the other started attacking his neck, he bucked a little, whimpering. The thought of Kyo leaving a mark just made him hot inside.

Kyo growled when Die reached back to pull him closer, his teeth digging into the skin of his neck a little roughly as he bucked up into him, the pain from earlier only serving to turn him on more.

Die let out a sharp cry, shocked mostly because he'd only ever let one other person mark him up. He let out a whine just after and reached down to start frantically jerking at his own cock.

Kyo shifted a bit and slid his hand up Die's chest, scratching the skin as his thrusts became more frantic. He moaned and lifted his head, licking at the mark he'd made then moved and bit into the back of Die's shoulder, getting rougher the closer he got to his peak.

"Jesus, Kyo!" He grabbed the wall as best he could, his fingers going white on the ledge, his fist pumping desperately over his cock. He was sure he looked the part of the madman right then. "Oh god!"

Kyo let out another growl as he grabbed Die's hips, bucking into him as hard as he could in the position they were in, panting. "Die...God..." Without much warning, Kyo suddenly came, crying out as he began filling Die, shuddering at the feel of it without a condom in place. "Oh...hnng"

Die let out a string of curses while the other started to cum inside him. He whimpered softly and ducked his head a little, jerking faster at his dick, just on the verge, but not quite there.

Kyo groaned and leaned against Die for a second before reaching around and cupping his balls, squeezing them a bit tightly, his other hand going to his nipple and tugging it. "What can I do to make you cum all over my shower wall baby? Tell you how fucking gorgeous your ass looks right now with my jizz dripping out of it? How I want to bend down there and lap it up?" He let go of Die's balls and did just that, bending down and pushing his tongue into Die's ass, groaning.

Die started to respond with how he thought that licking it out would actually be a grand idea to make him jizz himself into next Sunday. But a moment later, Kyo was just acting on it and Die's hand stilled for a moment before he jerked harshly a few times, splattering his cum out over the wall with some rather throaty moans.

Kyo moaned softly as Die came, continuing to lap at his ass then standing up and leaning against his back, his hands on the shower wall to support himself, his mouth moving to tenderly kiss the dark red marks on Die's shoulder and neck. "God Die....baby....just listening to you cum could get me hard again..."

Die let out a breathless little chuckle and then licked his lips slightly. "Mm... I'll remember that," he murmured, peering back toward him with an odd little unreadable look.

Kyo raised his head to look up at Die, brow furrowing slightly at the look in his eyes then just leaned forward to kiss the corner of his mouth since it was all he could reach in that position.

Die blinked, snapping out of it and sniffed a bit. "Aghh,.. sorry, I... uh... zoned out." He shifted a bit and reached to run his hand through his hair. "That... was sexy as shit."

Kyo laughed softly and moved to stand in front of Die, bringing his arms up around his neck. "Mhm... it was..." He hesitated for a moment then licked his lips. "We didn't use condoms... you know what that means right?"

Die peered at him and then gave him a questioning look. "Um... that you came inside me?" he asked looking confused.

Kyo grinned. "Why yes, yes I did…." He laughed and pulled Die closer. "Baby, don't look so serious... I can almost see what you're thinking and your worries are all unfounded." He leaned up and kissed Die softly.

Die gave him a questioning look, a bit confused by the direction of Kyo's thoughts. But it occurred to him that really, it was better for him if Kyo thought he was worried about that, rather than what he'd actually been thinking about. "Oh... um... I actually wasn't worried about it. Kyo, you're far less of a slut than I am." He gave him a flushed little look.

Kyo blinked slightly then nodded, just pulling Die close for a moment before huffing. "The water's gone cold."

He glanced at the shower and then shifted under the stream again, reaching back to wash himself off and then stroking his dick a bit to wash it as well. He glanced at Kyo and then at the water and then toward the rest of the bathroom. "Gotta pee... do you mind or should I wait until I'm out there?"

Kyo watched Die rinse himself, moving to do the same, thankful it wasn't entirely cold yet. At the question, he let out an amused huff and shook his head. "Go ahead... I do it all the damn time."

Die gave him a little look that clearly said he thought that was hot. He shifted a little and decided he could pee on the wall and then just wash it off after a moment. He pushed his hips toward the wall and started to go with a soft groan.

Kyo flat out stared at Die as he peed, smirking a bit as he stepped up beside him and in a moment, joined him in relieving himself, letting their streams mix.

Die groaned faintly, watching Kyo as he started to pee as well. He knew Kyo was doing it on purpose, watching him and everything just because he could push his buttons with it. But honestly, he didn't mind. These buttons he could allow to be pushed all he wanted.

Kyo finished up and turned to let the water wash the remaining droplets away. "Die... any time you want to watch or whatever... you can. I won't care."

He finished up as well, and then turned the shower head to wash the wall where he'd been urinating. With a soft chuckle, he leaned to kiss the corner of Kyo's mouth. "You make all of my fantasies come true, baby."

Kyo grinned, turning the water off and reaching out to grab a towel, wrapping it around Die, trapping him with it as he brought him close. "You have no idea how many of those fantasies we share, sweetheart... and more." He peered at Die for a moment then stepped back slightly, a soft smile on his lips as he turned to get another towel for himself.

Die peered at him and then smiled softly. "Wow," he murmured softly. "We should make an agreement to tell each other when we're sharing fantasies... don't you think?" he asked softly.

Kyo chuckled and nodded. "I think so..." He patted himself dry then turned to look at Die again. "You can sleep in a pair of my shorts if you want... by the way. Or...you know...nothing...."

Die snatched a towel and started to dry off, passing him by and whispering as he did, "I'll go with naked... but I want your sexy ass out on display all night, too. Just... you know... so you know." He pranced off toward the bedroom, something warm boiling inside and he felt like he was something special to get to spend the night with Kyo.

Kyo snorted, followed Die out into the bedroom, dropping his towel after scrubbing it over his hair. "I was planning to have my ass out on display... just for you." He grinned and bent over the bed, wiggling his butt in Die's general direction.

Die popped up off the bed and came to smack Kyo's ass, making sure to leave a hand print behind and then went back to the bed, smirking and plopping on it, rolling to move the covers around and get under them.

Kyo let out a playful growl, feeling oddly giddy as he went about getting ready for bed, running to the front to make sure the door was locked then coming back and flicking out the light before crawling into bed with Die, immediately shifting close to him, an arm draped around his chest. "Mmm it feels amazing to have someone next to me in bed again."

Die rolled toward him and then reached to touch his cheek, biting his lip a little and then huffing out a soft sigh against them. "Mmm..." he murmured softly, "it does. I haven't been next to someone at night... for a long time." He leaned in and closed his eyes, resting forehead against forehead. "I... I miss it."

Kyo nodded and nuzzled his nose against Die's. "Well... uhm... you don't have to anymore."

He leaned in and kissed him for a long moment before he murmured softly, "I... thank you."

Kyo curled his fingers in Die's hair and kissed him back, turning his head to nuzzle into Die's neck, lightly kissing the mark he’d made there earlier. "You're more than welcome."

Die closed his eyes and then settled in, licking his lips a little and smiling softly. "Goodnight, Kyo. Just... promise you'll still be here when I wake up."

Kyo hummed and nodded, reaching down to tug the blanket up over them. "I will be. I promise you that."

Die slid his hand over to grasp Kyo's, squeezing it and closing his eyes, settling to go to sleep.

**To Be Continued**  
[Chapter 2](http://cadkitten.livejournal.com/261866.html)  



	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Die and Kyo finally admit their sexual feelings for one another. Could it grow to be more?

Kyo woke up several hours later and looked up at a sleeping Die. Smiling to himself, he stretched slightly and hissed out a groan at the various aches making themselves known. With a shrug, he shifted a bit and started kissing at Die's jawline.

Die stirred to wakefulness at the feeling of a warm body squirming against his own. He let out a soft groan and pried one eye open, peering up at the familiar face. It sank in rather quickly about the night before and he shivered, reaching to run his hands over Kyo's sides. "Hey, gorgeous."

Kyo hummed and leaned in to peck Die's lips. "Mornin' baby... what's for breakfast?" He smirked and tweaked Die's stomach lightly before letting his hand wander over the other's side and along his hip.

Die let out a little groan and then yawned a bit, his hand coming to cover his mouth a little. He whimpered softly and then reached to rub his hand over Kyo's backside. "Cum?" he asked softly.

Kyo smirked and shifted toward Die, pressing his obvious morning wood against his thigh. "Sounds good to me... but... I have to piss." He grinned as his hips pressed a little more against the other's leg.

Die chuckled softly. "I have to, too. It's... a morning thing." He squirmed a little and then nipped at Kyo's ear, tugging on one earring before he pushed the blankets out of the way and tumbled out of bed. "Come on... bathroom," he paused and quirked an eyebrow at Kyo, "or... balcony."

Kyo nodded. "Generally is." He groaned a bit then looked towards the balcony, grinning wider. "Out there..." He crawled out of bed, wincing slightly as he stood up then moved over to Die, wrapping his arms around him from behind and kissing what turned out to be quite the hickey on his shoulder. "Mmm... love seeing my mark on you."

Die laughed. "Dirty bastard." He reached back to ruffle his hair slightly and then headed toward the balcony, slipping outside and shivering a little at the cool blast of air. He toed the chair out of the way and smirked slightly. "Furthest?"

Kyo chuckled. "You like me that way and you know it..." He followed Die onto the balcony and stood beside him, smirking. "I was just gonna piss on your leg… but okay."

"Hey, I'm not a hydrant!" He laughed and shook his head, standing by the other and taking his dick in hand. He gave the other a dirty look and then did his best to get it as far as possible, the sound of it quite loud against the concrete.

Kyo laughed then grasped his own dick, planting his feet apart and letting go, pushing it as far as he could, hoping like hell that someone didn't decide to take a walk right then. "I think I've got you beat...."

Die made a whining sound and then laughed. "Bastard. Your dick is longer when it's not hard!" He made a face and then shook his head, just finishing taking his morning piss, nudging Kyo with his hip while he continued.

Kyo sniggered, leaning towards the other a bit. "Penis envy, baby?" He grinned and finished up finally, shaking the last few drops off then just standing there, peering out over the balcony rail.

"Who wouldn't envy that gorgeous thing?" he made a little fake 'gasp' face and then shook his head a little as he finished up as well. He grabbed Kyo's hand and then pulled him with him back inside. "Quick, before someone wonders why it's raining."

Kyo just smirked, his ego well-fluffed now. "You could worship my gorgeous thing with your gorgeous mouth..." He followed Die back inside, shutting the door.

He pulled Kyo close to him and then let out a soft groan. "I could... and I will." He pushed him down the hall back toward the bedroom. "On the bed so I can properly suck the hell out of it!"

Kyo groaned softly, stealing a quick kiss before moving back into the bedroom, climbing onto the bed and laying on his back, his cock already half-hard. "Mm, come here then and suck the hell out of it, Die."

He bounced on the bed and crawled up toward him, smirking as he leaned down and started to lick the other's dick from tip to base and then back up.

Kyo watched Die bounce onto the bed then moaned loudly when his tongue touched his dick. "Mmm...you're such a sexy cock sucker."

Die peered up at him and then laughed softly before he just leaned down and engulfed the entire thing in his mouth, moaning around it. He could already feel himself getting hard from what he was doing.

Kyo groaned and propped himself up on his elbows to watch Die, rolling his hips a bit but not too much, he didn't want to choke him...this time. "God...baby..."

He reached to push down on the other's hips and then reached around to grab his ass, a little on the rough side. He made a strangled sort of noise around Kyo's dick, peering up at him. "Nnngghhh!"

Kyo growled and moved one of his hands to thread through Die's hair, giving it a slight yank, his cock throbbing against the other's lips.

Die popped up a few moments later and then licked his lips, sniffing slightly and then giving him a hopeful look. "Return the favor and then fuck the hell out of me?"

Kyo grinned and sat up, pulling Die to him. "Mm… gladly." He pushed Die down and moved between his legs, glancing up at the other as ran his tongue over the tip of his cock, slowly swirling it around.

Die flopped over backwards and then propped himself back up after a moment and peered at what Kyo was doing. He shuddered a bit and then reached to put his hand on the back of the other's head. He didn't push though, he just put his hand there more for effect.

Kyo smirked slightly then dropped his head all the way down, taking Die's full length, dragging his tongue along the underside as best as he could with a mouthful of dick. "Mmngh"

Die let out a strangled sound and then whimpered softly. "Oh god... you... oh Jesus, throat of... god!"

Kyo smirked around Die's length, swallowing around him a couple of times before beginning to bob his head up and down, making sure to thrust his tongue into the slit a few times.

Die started to whine each time the other dipped his tongue into his slit, enjoying that quite a bit. He whimpered softly and bucked up toward him, gasping a second later as he damn near shoved his dick down Kyo's throat and then struggled to back off. "Oh fuck I'm sorry!"

Kyo winced on the slightest bit, looking up at Die as he swallowed around him then pulled off, licking his lips with a slight grin. "Fuck Die... if I'd known you were that turned on..." He reached down and ran his thumb over the tip of Die's dick before dipping his head back down and repeating the motion with his tongue, teasing more than anything now.

Die grit his teeth, flushing slightly. "I'm sorry... I... ah!" He had to struggle even more trying not to buck his hips, whimpering a little.

Kyo finally sat back and smirked at Die. "Stop apologizing... I think it's fucking hot when you lose control. Now come here and lose it on my cock." He shifted and laid back onto his back, reaching into the nightstand to pull out some lube.

Die moved toward him and then reached for the lube, taking it from him and then poured some on his fingers, rubbing it around. "I'm not so sure I'll ever stop losing control around you." He leaned down and licked over one nipple while he started to lube up Kyo's cock.

Kyo groaned softly, his hips jerking slightly when Die touched him. "Mm... good..." He ran his hand down Die's back, arching against the lick to his nipple, another soft groan spilling from his lips.

Die shuddered slightly and then shifted over him, spreading his legs and settling down on the other, slowly starting to push him into his body. "Shit," he hissed out, wincing as he tried to just take him without any prep.

Kyo reached up and grabbed Die's hips, moaning lowly as he slid onto him, his hips rolling up, pushing in the rest of the way. "Oh… God. Die! You feel so damn good wrapped around my cock." He reached up and ran his hands over Die's chest then settled them back on his hips, slowly pushing up into him.

Die whined softly as Kyo sank into him. He felt like he was on cloud nine and he shuddered slightly, closing his eyes and huffing out a breath. "Fuck. Oh... oh Kyo!"

Kyo groaned softly, reaching up to tug Die down to him, wrapping his arms around his back and bucking into him slowly. "Hnng...Die!"

Die let out a whine and pushed his thighs tight against the other's sides as he started to move in tandem with the other.

He turned his head and found Die's lips with his own, kissing him deeply as they moved together, moaning lowly.

Die curled his arms around the other's torso and nuzzled against him for a moment before the other initiated the kiss. He smiled into it and kissed him back, still moving with him.

Kyo ran his hands down Die's back and over the swell of his ass, grabbing a handful of cheek and holding on as he moved a bit faster. He pulled back from the kiss just enough to smile and murmur against Die's lips. "Perfection..."

Die's eyes widened as the other grabbed his ass and squeezed. He liked that, given that he really didn't have much of an ass to speak of. He chuckled a little breathlessly and huffed a bit.

Kyo grinned and nipped Die's bottom lip, letting go of his ass in favor of taking hold of narrow hips instead, rolling his own steadily upward, pushing into Die's body.

Die opened his mouth and huffed out, "I… l-" and then just ended it in a huffing breath, whimpering a bit, realizing he kept on doing this and he couldn't even begin to be dumb enough to say it. "I love this!" There, that was a good cover, right?

Kyo hummed softly, nuzzling Die's neck. "I'm glad." He chuckled lightly then grabbed Die more firmly, rolling them over so that he was hovering above him and pushed one of Die's legs up against his chest, thrusting into him at the different angle.

Die yelped a little when Kyo rolled them over and then whined softly, closing his eyes and arching toward Kyo as he started to thrust into him at this new - and quite effective - angle.

Kyo smirked at Die's reactions, loving the little sounds he made. He leaned down on one hand and brought the other between them, brushing over Die's length softly, just teasing him for now. "I could wake up like this every morning...."

"Me, too," he whispered out, feeling like he was going to cry from the feeling of Kyo's words sinking into him, but he had his eyes closed and they weren't leaking, so he had no problems to worry about, just floating on the words he knew probably meant more to him than they should.

Kyo groaned softly, leaning down to nuzzle Die's neck, rolling his hips, running his fingers through Die's hair and just connecting with him. "Hnng..."

Die shifted a little, wrangling one leg over Kyo and then rolling them over again so he was on top once more. He pushed himself down and then started to move up and down on his dick, pressing his face against the other's neck and moaned softly.

Kyo huffed out a laugh when Die flipped them once again, reaching up to grasp his hips, drawing his knees up to buck into the other's body, one hand sliding up his spine to tangle in his hair. "Dai~ God..."

"Kyo," he huffed out, moving down against him, their bodies meeting in a way that Die was honestly finding it a bit difficult to grasp how much it was meaning to him. He buried his face against Kyo's neck more solidly, not wanting his confused look to register even remotely during this, honestly amazing, sex.

Kyo wrapped his arms around Die, holding him tightly against his body as he tilted his head, letting out a soft sound. He felt like he could probably do this all day, just not even worry about cumming, instead just stay connected to the other, something about it sinking right into his soul.

Die moved in a way that had nothing to do with building toward release and more just continuing to move with one another. He let out a quiet little sigh against his neck and nuzzled a little.

Kyo shifted slightly and kissed the top of Die's head, hands travelling up and down his back lightly, almost forgetting to keep to moving. "Mmnn..."

Die kept them moving, just a shift of his hips every few seconds. He moaned softly and then let out Kyo's name again in the softest manner possible. "I..." he closed his eyes and pressed his lips to Kyo's collar bone, not wanting to say anything stupid.

Kyo finally pulled back and brought his hand to Die's face, tilting it up so he could kiss him softly, humming against his lips, thumb caressing his cheek even as he rolled his hips, pushing deeper into Die.

He let out a soft whine and pushed down harder on him, gasping as he hit his prostate with the other's cock. He spread his legs a little more and continued to press against the area, whimpering softly each time.

Kyo groaned and slid a hand between them, wrapping it around Die's length, stroking him as he pushed up into him, helping him hit that spot again. "You're gorgeous like this..."

Die's breath huffed out between them, his eyes slightly glassy. He whimpered again at the other's words. "I... oh god.. Kyo... you... ah!"

Kyo almost chuckled at the way Die's words came out, shaking his head and shutting him up with another deep kiss, jerking his hips more, groaning into the kiss.

Despite the emotional turmoil still rampant in Die's mind, he moved with Kyo, getting a bit more aggressive as his dick decided to take over the action, spurring him into meeting Kyo's thrusts as harshly as he could, achingly hard in Kyo's hand.

Kyo leaned up and bit Die's neck, moaning against it as he started slamming his hips upward, desperation taking over though the emotional was still driving him. "Dai~suke! Hnng!!"

Die didn't miss the way his name was said. He whined softly and shoved down a few more times before he gasped out the other's name as he started to cum. "O-oh god!"

Kyo shuddered as he felt Die cumming, spilling over his hand. He snapped his hips up a few more times then joined him in falling over the edge, another moan of the other's name spilling from his lips as he filled him. "Ah~!!"

The guitarist whined a little and stuffed his face against the other's neck, mouthing the words he couldn't say, followed by more mouthing, just because he couldn't say them out loud just yet and didn't want to risk Kyo knowing what he was doing.

Kyo groaned softly, settling down then wrapping his arms around Die, hugging him tightly, feeling his mouth moving against his neck and having a guess at what those lips were forming but instead of feeling like running away, it only made him hold Die tighter, burying his face against his hair.

Die felt like he was incredibly, horribly happy. He closed his eyes and tried to even out his breathing. He didn't even want to move, to disconnect them, just wanting to stay right there with him. "Kyo," he whispered out again.

Kyo shifting only to move his lips to Die's forehead then his cheek and the corner of his mouth. "Die..." he sighed softly, trailing his hand down Die's back in a lazy sort of way. "...perfection..."

Die let out a soft sound and then moved to lick over Kyo's Adam’s apple. "Hnnggg," he offered softly, in reply to the other's words.

He smiled and tilted his head to find Die's lips again, connecting them in a whole other way for a moment before pulling back again, eyes full of unspoken emotions.

When they separated, he stared down into Kyo's eyes, seeing something written there that gave him the chills. He pulled his lower lip into his mouth, chewing it for a moment before letting it go and opening his mouth. A moment later, he closed it and tried hard not to go and fuck things up by saying what he wanted so badly to.

Kyo stared up at Die for a moment then finally reached up and cupped his face. "You look like a fish out of water, baby... just spit it out." He already knew what Die would say. It was so obvious and so very close to his own feelings and emotions even though he was afraid of it, having been ripped apart far too many times, not that he thought Die would do that.

Die stared at him for a moment, his heart clenching in his chest. It was so dangerous, incredibly so. He pursed his lips a little and looked away until he could gather himself a little bit more. He let out a huff and then looked back at him, reaching to run his knuckles over his cheek. "I... I love you," he murmured out softly, but with so much conviction it was more than obvious that his words came from the depths of his heart.

Kyo swallowed a bit, the words making his heart thump wildly in his chest. He opened his mouth to respond but instead reached out to pull Die to him, kissing him hard, spilling his emotions into the kiss, hoping he understood for the moment why he didn't say it back.

Die made a little strangled sound as he was pulled down into the kiss from Kyo. He hadn't expected to hear the words in return, but he also hadn't expected that. He kissed him back after a moment, relaxing into it.

After a bit, he released Die then gazed up at him, a genuine smile on his lips, his fingers softly brushing his hair out of his face. "Stay with me...?"

He moved to curl himself closer around Kyo and yet not lying on top of him anymore. Letting out a soft sound, he murmured softly, "Of course I will stay with you, baby."

Kyo nodded and wrapped his arm around Die, sighing happily. "Good..."

Die leaned toward him and then nuzzled his nose against his neck a bit. He tried to think of a good way to ask the relevant question of how much Kyo meant with the question. Finally, he decided there was no non-awkward way. "Which way do you mean... exactly? I mean, I'm good with it no matter what, but I need to know for... reference." Well that was more awkward than necessary.

Kyo chuckled softly and shook his head. "I meant forever... in my basement." He smirked then ran a hand through Die's hair. "Actually... I guess I meant just here… with me, for a while."

Die chuckled a bit. "Mmm... I'd hate to be in the basement forever, Kyo. I'm not sure I'm cut out for the dark, dank places." He smirked a little and kissed his cheek. "I'd love to stay here for a while. Though... I do need some of my stuff."

Kyo chuckled softly and nuzzled into Die. "Oh fine, you can have some sunlight. Geez, already being high maintenance."

He chuckled. "Yeah, like I get much now. Between home and work in the car?" He shook his head a little. "But yeah... at least essentials. Like... how long are we talking?" He peered curiously at the other.

Kyo sat up a bit, laughing as he rubbed Die's back idly. "Mmm..." He shrugged slightly, chewing his bottom lip. "Well, how about we start at a week and... go from there?" He wasn't really sure what the standard was there, besides, when they started touring or recording again, times like this would be rare.

Die smiled and moved to kiss the other's cheek, nuzzling there for a long moment. "A week it is. Should I go get my stuff then?"

Kyo nodded then cocked his head. "Want me to come with... or?" He didn't want to smother Die.

"You want to?" he asked, a bit surprised. He hadn't wanted to bore Kyo with the tediousness of packing up. But if the other would come with him, then that would make him happier.

Kyo smiled slightly. "Yeah... I'd like to." He stood up and tugged the other to him, nipping his bottom lip. "But first, I think a quick shower is in order."

Die smiled against his lips. "Good... I'd like you there." He groaned a little at the nipping and followed along with him. "Mmm... sounds good."

Kyo grinned and dragged Die off with him, making quick work of washing them both, not really giving Die much chance to do anything on his own. When he was finished, he plopped a towel on Die's head then went to brush his teeth, padding around his bathroom naked without shame. "Don't forget a toothbrush. Morning breath is awful."

Die allowed the entire thing to happen and then laughed as the other plopped a towel on his head. He took it and dried off, watching Kyo prance around the room. "I am not going to get over you being naked in front of me any time soon. Just... you know... so you know." He patted his ass as he walked past him, heading to go get his clothing on. "Hey... got a pair of underwear I can borrow?" He paused. "If that's not... weird."

Kyo smirked and shook his ass in Die's general direction, feeling... giddy which was unusual for him. "I'll be sure to be naked more often then, so you get used to it." He wandered into his bedroom and dug into a drawer, pulling out a bright red strip of cloth. "Will these do?" He smirked, holding them up, showing that they were actually a silk thong.

Die arched an eyebrow at Kyo and his unusual underwear collection. He chuckled and then reached for them, examining and then snorting. "You keep strange underwear," he murmured, shaking his head and smiling. He slipped them on and then went about finding his jeans and shirt. "I seriously need a change of clothing when we get there. These are gonna stink."

Kyo smirked and dressed himself, tugging on a pair of track pants and tank top before catching Die around the waist. "Wanna know a secret?"

Die leaned back toward him and purred out a soft, "Hmm?" as he did up his belt buckle.

Kyo nibbled at Die's earlobe for a minute, reaching down to "help" him with his belt buckle. "I got those because they made me think of you."

The guitarist let out a faint little groan, feeling incredibly warmed by the fact that Kyo had done such a thing. "Have you ever worn them?" he asked softly, fingers resting over Kyo's on his belt.

Kyo smirked. "Once or twice..." He lowered his voice, pressing his lips right next to Die's ear. "...and I've soiled them a few times."

Die smirked a little. He patted Kyo's hands. "We're gonna end up fucking again if we don't get going." He laughed.

The vocalist let out a laugh and nodded, pulling away from Die. "You're right about that." He picked up his phone and keys and lead the way out, locking the door behind them.

Die grabbed his cell phone and realized it was dead from the night without a charger. "Make me remember to pick up my charger, yeah?" He padded out after Kyo, a dumb little smile on his face.

Kyo chuckled and nodded. "Sure...and toothbrush...and shampoo and underwear."

"Maybe I want to wear yours," he leaned over and hissed in his ear before casually walking off just after, leading the way out and then pausing, wondering where Kyo's car was, if he even had one. It made him realize the things he didn't know about someone he'd known for years and years of his life.

"Well, you could... or none at all." He smirked then led Die out to his car, a sleek black little number that he was rather fond of. He clicked the unlock button the remote and got in, waiting for Die to join him.

Die slid into the car and then replied, "Too dangerous to do all the time. Balls got stuck once," he admitted, looking flustered for a moment at the memory, shaking it off. "And... nice car, by the way."

Kyo winced at the very thought and reached out automatically to pat Die's leg in sympathy. "Ouch..." He grinned at the compliment to his car, running a hand over the dash. "Thanks, I love it..." He started the engine and pulled out of the parking lot, heading towards Die's place.

To Be Continued


	3. Give Yourself Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The exploration of a relationship treading on dangerous territory. It could rip the band apart if it all falls apart wrong, or it could make it stronger as a whole. Which will it be?

Die allowed himself to just sit there in the car, his eyes closed and his body sinking comfortably into the seat. He licked his lips every few minutes, a nervous habit that was the reason he applied lip balm so often, and occasionally reached up to play with his hair. There was no real reason for his nerves, but they existed nonetheless, something he couldn’t stop even if he tried.

Kyo occasionally glanced over at Die, humming slightly before reaching up and flicking on the radio, smirking as their own music began playing through the speakers.

Die glanced at the stereo and chuckled a little. "Wow... of all the odds." He rubbed his hands over his pants, itching for a cigarette. But he knew Kyo had stopped years ago and didn't want to smoke in his car.

Kyo chuckled and shook his head, flicking it off. "If I listen to it, I start analyzing my voice..." He finally pulled up to Die's place, parking, and then looking over at Die.

"I always find it sort of sweet," he murmured softly, reaching to run his fingers over Kyo's hand before he turned and got out of the car, shutting the door, and wandering toward his building.

Kyo sat there for a moment, blushing. "Feh..." He got out and followed Die, but not too closely though, just in case.

Die made his way up to his apartment and went about letting them in. He flicked on some lights and his cat came rushing toward him, mewling loudly for attention. He knelt down and scratched her between the ears. "Can she come or should I get a sitter for a week?" he asked, realizing he hadn't quite thought that one out.

Kyo was busy looking around Die's place when he spotted the cat. He knelt down and started cooing at her, picking her up and cuddling her. "Of course you can bring her..." He looked a bit embarrassed before speaking up again. "I... uh… didn't know you had a cat."

Die smiled a little. "That's okay, I didn't know you had a car." He gestured at the cat. "That's Snowball, by the way. I found her when she was a kitten out in the snow, almost dead... on my birthday." He gave her a sad little smile. "Just a little baby. Almost not old enough to survive without her mother. I nursed her though that stage and we’ve been attached at the hip ever since." He went to start gathering her stuff first.

Kyo cuddled Snowball to his chest, tickling her little furry tummy. "Poor little thing..." He cooed over her a bit longer then set her down, going to follow Die instead. "You can put her litter box in the hall bathroom... unless you've toilet trained her."

Die laughed. "I'm weird, but I have not done that." He went and grabbed a bucket of litter and Snowball's old box, then her food and two travel bowls he'd gotten when he went to Mei to visit his parents. He pulled out a little soft carrier for the cat and put it aside as well. "She didn't like the box, pissed herself out of fear every time. But this thing she loves. It's warm and soft and she'll sit in it all day and just peer out like it's the greatest thing." He chuckled a little and moved to get a bag for his own stuff.

He chuckled and watched Snowball wander over to the carrier, sniffing it. "Cute." He got up and followed Die into the bedroom, thinking dirty thoughts about his bed. "Don't forget your charger, toothbrush, and toys." He smirked at that last part, wondering if the other did have any toys.

Die glanced back at him, wondering if he was serious about the toys part. His collection was a bit... awkward, to say the least. He plopped the bag on the bed and then started filling it with clothing first, then his stuff from the bathroom, in a case already - all his backup stuff. His phone charger went in and then his tour laptop bag. And finally, he paused, finally kneeling down and pulling a container from under the bed, opening the lid and revealing the contents to be quite the extensive collection of porn magazines and all sorts of toys. He pursed his lips and glanced at Kyo to see his reaction.

Kyo watched Die pack, noting what all he was bringing the turned his attention to the box of porn and toys. "Nice collection...." He leaned over and pointed to a slender, swirled stick. "What's that for?"

Die smirked a little. "Want me to bring it and find out?" He picked up a leather case and put it in the bag, then tossed in his favorite vibrating dildo and lube. Next, some condoms and one very well worn porn mag. Not that he thought he was going to need it, but it was a tour habit. Just the one he could get off to the fastest so he wouldn't bother the others so much.

Kyo raised an eyebrow then smirked. "Yes, please do..." He noted the other stuff with some amusement, yoinking the magazine and flipping through it. "Interesting...." He placed it back in Die's bag then reached over rub his leg, feeling worked up again. "Is that everything?"

Die glanced at him looking through the magazine and blushed a little. "Sorry... habit. I guess I don't really need it, though, yeah?" He chewed his lip a little, adding the other toy and then went to put the box back safely under his bed. He grabbed his jacket and then his pre-packed "bus bag", tossing that on the bed as well. "That should be it."

Kyo smirked slightly, shaking his head. "You pack like a girl, baby."

Die rolled his eyes. "It's a week and it's not like we have concerts to be doing. Let's say, I'm notoriously a very bored person. So if you go out somewhere I'll need to do something or you'll come back and I'll have rearranged your entire kitchen or something. I think, you really don't want that." He laughed softly.

Kyo laughed and tugged Die to him, nibbling his bottom lip. "Don't worry, you'll have plenty to do." He smirked then shouldered Die's bag. "But if you do rearrange the kitchen, be sure I can reach everything."

Die smirked and pulled Kyo close, hand fisted in his hair and pushed his tongue into his mouth, kissing him deeply before releasing him. "Goddamn... that does not get old." He smoothed Kyo's hair down a little and pecked his lips once more before zipping up his bag and going back to the front to put Snowball into her bag.

Kyo groaned into the kiss then shook his head, smirking as he licked his lips. "No, it doesn't." He followed Die out, carrying his bag. "Now Snowball, let's agree that you're not going to piss or put hairballs on my stuff. Okay?" He looked at the cat in all seriousness.

Die smiled. "She hasn't pissed anywhere she isn't supposed to since being a kitten. Can't guarantee anything on the hairballs though." He sniffed a bit and then went back to get one thing, tossing a carton of cigarettes into his bag and zipping it up. He knew quite well that he'd go nuts without it.

Kyo chuckled softly. "Good kitty... and as long as she doesn't hairball onto my things, we'll be alright." He watched Die grabbing cigarettes and licked his lips, briefly missing the habit, especially after sex. Shaking his head, he looked at Die's stuff. "Ready to go? Got everything?"

Die nodded and glanced at the cat stuff. "I think with the litter, we'll have to make two trips. That shit is heavy as fuck." He pushed it closer to the door with his foot and shouldered the cat stuff bag and then the kitty bag. "Two trips."

Kyo nodded and picked up Die's other bag, moving towards the door with him. "Alright then, let's go. Snowball can ride in the trunk, right?" He grinned to let Die know he was joking.

Die arched an eyebrow at him. "Only if you can drive from the trunk, my dear." He smirked a little and went to the elevator, pushing it with his elbow and waiting on it come up to get them. When it did, he slipped inside and pressed for the ground floor.

Kyo snorted and stepped inside the elevator, standing close to Die with a smirk. "Ever have sex in an elevator?"

He threw his lover a glance and then smirked. "Not in this one certainly." He gestured up at the corner. "Camera up there. Hard to see, but it's there. Hate to have that make its way onto the internet. God knows I'm one step away from a sex tape online most of my life."

Kyo laughed and leaned over to kiss Die's cheek. "We should make a sex tape and sell it online."

"Can you imagine the amount of money?" he laughed and shook his head. "If the band ever goes kerplunk, we should. It'll be our next big venture. Gay Japanese porn, starring actual rockstars, all your fantasies come true!"

"I'm sure we'd make more with that in overseas sales alone than what we make in a year." He laughed, the very thought of it highly amusing. "I made one once, years ago. I still have a copy somewhere."

Die stared at him for a moment, sort of fish-mouthing. Finally, he choked out, "Show me. I need to see this."

Kyo snorted. "Okay but it's really shitty. VHS doesn't last... but it might still play."

Die held up a finger. "Dude... it doesn't matter how shitty it is - as long as it's not literal... and even then... eh... I might, because it’s you - but jesus."

Kyo shook his head, laughing. "No no, the only kinky thing about it is the bottom strapped to my bed with leather." He smirked a bit. "I'll show you it when we get back to my place then." The elevator stopped then and he stepped out, waiting for Die to join him before heading off to his car, popping the trunk for the bags not containing a cat.

Die smirked a little. "Mmm... sexy. Anyone I would know?" He plunked all bags but the one with Snowball into the trunk and then went to go put her in the front seat. He cracked one window a bit and then closed the door. "We will be back shortly, sweetheart."

Kyo paused for a moment at the question and coughed. "Maybe..." He didn't say anymore as he locked the car again, chuckling a bit as Die chatted with his cat. "You should grab your guitar...."

Die glanced up. "Actually... they're all at the studio. The one I had at home had... an incident... and is currently at the shop." He frowned a bit and wrinkled his nose. "But if you're suggesting we should compose together, we could slip by the studio."

Kyo hummed slightly, the faintest look of disappointment on his face. "Actually, I just wanted to hear you play without the atmosphere of recording or lives."

He reached toward Kyo, remembering at the last second that they were in public and went from what he was going to do to instead patting his back. "We'll go pick one up. Acoustic or electric?"

Kyo watched Die then smiled slightly, nodding. "Alright. Acoustic then." He glanced to his car. "Want me to go get the kitty litter quick so you can stay with her?"

"The huge bag of food and the litter box are in there, too. It'll take both of us." He gestured him toward the building again. "She'll be fine for five minutes."

He nodded and followed Die. "Okay." He waited until they were on the elevator again and shifted so his back was to the camera, moving close to Die and pecking his cheek.

Die smirked a little. "Mmm... stop temping me in this elevator. I know five different ones that have no camera where all kinds of naughty things can happen." He reached to rub over Kyo's hair.

Kyo chuckled. "Oh you do, do you? I'll hold you to it then."

Die held up a hand for a high-five. "And how!"

He slapped Die's hand then walked off the elevator, shaking his head. "Do your neighbors know you? Only one of mine knows me, as far as I know."

"Er... long story short... yes. Most of the hallway does." He went to open his door and opened it, stepping inside and going to go and get their stuff. He glanced back at him. "Long story long, I got trashed alone one night and went up and down the hallway, sharing shots with anyone who would and handing out demo CDs." He let out a little laugh and flushed. "Got the cops called on me by the lady in 14B."

Kyo stopped and stared at Die then burst out laughing. "Nice one, Die...way to be discrete." He grinned and slapped Die's back, shaking his head. "What'd the cops say?"

"Yeah... no one ever said I was smart, Kyo." He laughed and shook his head. "Eh... they made me come back inside and thanked me for not leaving the building and for not asking them if they'd like a shot, because that would have gotten me put in the drunk tank for the night. The older one even wished me a very merry hangover... and man was he ever right."

Kyo chuckled softly. "I know you're not smart, you're with me." He grinned slightly then shook his head. "Well, I suppose it served you right? I could just see the look on Kaoru's face if he had to bail you out of jail."

"Ha! Like I'd have called him. I'm not stupid and besides, I know to call Nora, thank you very much." He looked a little sheepish, as though he knew by experience. He grabbed the cat food bag and the litter box after slinging his laptop bag over his shoulder. "Get the litter?"

Kyo snorted, hoisting the litter up. "I see..." He shook his head, grinning. "That's why I'm Nora's favorite, she's never had to bring me a bucket or bail my ass out of trouble with the cops."

"Surprising, given that you are, in fact, Kyo. King of all kinds of trouble... just not trouble with the booze or the cops, I guess. Though, I have to beg to differ on the bucket bit. She gave you the ones on stage years ago, remember?" He smirked a little and went to lock up behind them.

Kyo smirked. "I'm never any trouble, I just sit in my bunk quietly." He laughed and followed Die back to the elevator. "It's not like I'm demanding or need my own space and stuff."

"Mmmhmm... Mr. couldn't be woken up one day and had Nora freaking out." He coughed and peered at him, smirking a little. "But yes... the least amount of trouble; that is true."

"That's happened more than once..." He grinned a little, the slightest bit of sheepishness on his face as they finally got back to the car. "I should start insisting on crazy shit like only red M&Ms or something. Think she'd do it?"

"Totally. She'd walk to the moon and back for you, I swear it." He huffed out a soft sigh and shook his head a little. The elevator dinged to let them off and he adjusted the bag of food, plodding off toward the car.

Kyo chuckled and shook his head, walking after Die to the car. "Perhaps… I wonder if she'd find it strange if I requested to be roomed with you next tour." He popped the trunk and set the litter in then grabbed the food from Die, putting it in as well before shutting the trunk and moving to get into the car.

"Probably not. I mean it wouldn't be the first time. She knows we've both sort of... helped one another through the rough times before. She’d probably just watch to see if she needed to help, too." Die put in the litter box on top and then went to go get in the car, putting Snowball on his lap. He was quiet for a long moment and then murmured, "I can't believe we're doing this. It's like... my dreams are all coming to fruition."

Kyo hummed and nodded, remembering the times that both Die and Nora had had to help him out of the darkest recesses of his own mind and soul. When Die mentioned his dreams coming true, he smiled softly and leaned over, kissing his cheek. "I'm just sorry it's taken so long..."

Die turned and gently cupped the back of Kyo's neck and pulled him toward him, kissing him ever so sweetly. After a moment, he pulled back and smiled softly. "Maybe it took us just long enough for us to be really ready."

He hummed and reached up, running his fingers through Die's hair as he returned the kiss. "Mm, perhaps so..." He pulled back a little and grinned. "Ready to go?"

Die settled back and let out a breath. "Ready." This was a huge step that Die had honestly never taken before and he was honestly ready for it at this point in his life. He leaned back and closed his eyes. "Ready for my new life."

Kyo glanced over at him and reached out to run his hand over his leg, patting slightly before turning the car and pulling out onto the street, heading to his place. "New life, indeed."

Die reached to put his hand on Kyo's leg, just leaving it there. "Mmm... hey... how awkward is it that I keep wanting to tell you how I feel about you? Like every five minutes?"

Kyo stopped at a traffic light and turned to Die, grinning. "Just a tiny bit but, I don't mind. It's been a long time since I've heard those words sincerely."

He shifted closer and pressed his lips to Kyo's ear, purring out, "I love you, Kyo." He smiled and settled back again.

Kyo shivered slightly, moving his hand to place over Die's on his leg, squeezing it tightly. "Thank you..." He knew that wasn't the most romantic response but it'd have to do for now.

Die was okay with the response, understanding that Kyo couldn't return the sentiment right then. He squeezed Kyo's leg a little and he smiled softly. "My sweet, sweet, Kyo." He paused. "MY... wow."

Kyo turned the car into his parking lot, stopping before responding to Die by turning and tugging him over, kissing him deeply. He let go after a minute and pulled back, smiling. "Don't get possessive now." He winked a bit then pecked Die's lips again to let him know he was only joking.

Die rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean." He reached in to scritch Snowball's head because she was pawing nervously at the side of the bag. Instantly she calmed and settled, starting to purr and he smiled.

Kyo chuckled and nipped Die's lip before sliding out of the car, ducking his head back in. "I don't care if you are..." He went to get the stuff out of the trunk, managing to hoist both litter and food on each of his shoulders.

Die stared at him for a moment once he had all the stuff on his shoulders. He just stared for a moment, feeling his body react to the sight. He swallowed a bit and then cleared his throat, grabbing as many of the other bags as he could, feeling like he needed to prove a point.

Kyo raised an eyebrow then smirked, knowing that look on Die's face by now. He chuckled softly as the other gathered up the rest of the bags. "Can you get all that and the cat? Or should we make another trip?"

"I've got it," Die replied, making sure to put the carrier around his neck so he wouldn't squish Snowball. He got everything else and pushed the door shut with his foot, grunting a little.

Kyo just laughed, leading the way inside the building, pushing the elevator button with his hip then getting on, waiting for Die to enter and the doors to close before speaking again. "You know...I think it's cute the way you're trying to prove your manliness when I've heard you scream like a girl." He shuffled the bags, smirking.

Die peered at him and then huffed. "Please... just because I make girly sounds in bed doesn't mean I'm a wuss."

He cackled and shook his head. "I never said you were a wuss, baby. Girls can be strong, too." He grinned at Die then stepped off the elevator, heading to his door, somehow managing to get the keys out of his pocket without putting either bag down. He unlocked the door and stepped aside to let Die in.

"So I'm a girl now?" He gave Kyo a look that clearly said he was about to prove that he wasn't a girl if that was the case.

Kyo just smirked, setting the litter and food down in the front hall for now, reaching out and grabbing one of the bags off Die's shoulder. He shrugged lightly, licking his lips. "Maybe... you're the one with the fluffy white kitten around your neck."

Die moved to put his bags aside and then put the cat down as well, opening the bag and let her out. He pushed Kyo up against the wall and leaned in to hiss, "My sweet Kyo... I can show you how much of a man I am."

Kyo kept the smirk on his face, having gotten just the reaction he wanted. "Mm, can you now sweetheart? Gonna give me a demonstration?" He reached up, tugging lightly at a strand of Die's hair, his tongue flicking out over his lips slowly.

Die moved to push his nose against Kyo's neck, inhaling the scent of the other's body. He let out a little sound and then murmured softly, "You're a little sweaty," as his hands ran up his sides, excitement already boiling in his veins.

Kyo bit back a groan, sliding his hand up to tangling in Die's hair at the back of his neck. "Manly exertion, baby..."

Die groaned softly, his hips pressing against him and rubbing a little, showing that he was already aroused by the other's sweaty skin and manly display. "God... we're just going to fuck like rabbits, aren't we?" He chuckled a bit breathlessly.

Kyo finally moved and shifting a bit, grabbing Die's hips and pulling him flush against his own, pressing into him to show that he, too, was already aroused. "Do you have a problem with that?"

"Hell no, I do not." He grabbed his hand and pushed it back toward his ass, reaching to grab his ass and rub against him, shamelessly wanting to get himself riled up as much as he could.

"Good..." He growled lowly, grasping Die's ass roughly and grinding against him. He leaned in and dragged his tongue over the still dark mark he'd left on Die's neck, smirking slightly as he scraped his teeth over it.

Die let out a little whine and then went for it, hoisting Kyo up and just praying he'd wrap his legs around him so he could get the other to the bedroom.

Kyo laughed softly against the other's skin as he was lifted up, naturally wrapping his legs around Die's waist and his arms around his neck. "Sure you can handle me?"

"Of course I can handle you." He smirked as he padded off to the bedroom with Kyo. Granted, he was a bit heavy to be hauling around like this, but it wasn't far and Die was determined. Besides, he'd dragged a drunk, blacked-out Toshiya around before and that was way worse. He plunked the other down on the bed, kneeling to start undoing the other's pants.

Kyo just smirked then held on for the ride, feeling himself all the more aroused at Die's actions because as much as he loved control there was something about giving it up that struck deep within him. When he was laid on the bed, he didn't move, just let Die go on with what he was doing.

Die got his lover's pants off and then tossed them aside, working his own off as well. He shifted close and leaned down over him, grabbing the bottle of lube out from under the pillow. He'd seen it peeking out from under there. "You're gorgeous."

Kyo groaned softly, glancing at the lube, his tongue flicking over his lips. "Trying to make me blush?" He smirked slightly and reached up to stroke his hand down Die's back.

Die moved to sort of nip at the other's earlobe, tugging lightly on it. "I love you," he hissed out quietly into the other's ear. He shifted a bit over the other, grinding a bit on his leg.

He shifted and pushed his leg up against Die before sliding his hand up and drawing the other's face close to his, nipping his bottom lip. "I love you, too, Die." He pulled back the slightest bit to look into Die's eyes, to let him know that he was sincere and not just saying it.

Die's breath caught in his throat, pulling back enough to see the other, studying him closely. After a moment, he went to push his mouth against the other's, kissing him deeply, rocking against him with a renewed passion.

Kyo stroked his thumb over Die's cheek as he looked at him then groaned softly into the kiss, returning it with equal passion, his hips rolling up to press against Die.

Die moved to grab the lube, squirting some on his fingers and moving his finger down to press against the other's entrance, rubbing lightly as his lips traveled down the other's neck.

Kyo let out a breath and shifted his legs up, giving Die better access, shuddering slightly at the first touch. He tilted his head, moaning lightly when Die's lips hit a sensitive spot on his neck, his hand coming up to tangle in his hair. "Mmn…"

Die focused his attention there, smirking a little and sucking on the skin enough to leave a light mark on him, his finger pushing into the other's body.

He moaned again, louder this time as Die teased him, his hips arching up a bit. After a moment of letting Die work his finger in, he slid his hand down to brush over the other's length, smirking slightly. "So hard for me already, baby?"

Die scraped his teeth over the area and then pulled back to whisper, "I'm almost always hard for you, sweetheart." He pushed in a second finger, not wanting to hurt Kyo too much, though still wanting to assert dominance.

Kyo groaned and pushed against Die's fingers, turning his head to nip at the other's bottom lip. "Mm, good..."

"Fuck, baby, I need my dick in you so fucking bad." He groaned faintly, pulling his fingers free and then quickly slicking up his dick, moving closer and pushing against him, slipping in with one good push, all the way to the hilt.

With a smirk, Kyo gladly spread himself open for Die. "Then fuck me baby...hard." He groaned as Die slid into him fully, hands automatically dragging down the other's spine, shuddering a bit. "Fuck...Die"

Die shuddered a bit as he sank into the other, pursing his lips and then slowly starting to thrust in and out of the other, wanting to build up to the vigorous thrusting where he'd actually lay full claim to the other.

Kyo moaned and leaned up to catch Die in a deep kiss before dropping back and just gazing up at him, bucking up every now and then to meet his thrusts. "You are...fucking...amazing."

"So are you," he murmured softly, starting to thrust a little faster, deeper, harder. "Oh, god," he hissed out against his ear, teeth grabbing his earring and tugging a little to see Kyo's reaction.

He let out a soft groan as Die pulled at his piercing, a slight shiver going through him. "Hnng..." Unable to keep his hands still, he moved them back up to drag over Die's chest. "Fuck me harder, baby..."

Die shifted them, pushing Kyo's legs up closer to his chest and repositioning himself so he could start to thrust into him as quickly as possible, moaning loudly at the pleasure of just letting go and fucking the hell out of him.

Kyo pulled his knees up and spread them for Die, moving with him as best as he could in this new position, a loud cry ripping from him when Die hit his prostate. "Ah! Yes!"

When he found the right place, he slammed into it like nothing else, moaning and gasping for breath, fucking him as hard as he could, the sound of skin slapping on skin filling the room.

As Die repeatedly hit his prostate, Kyo's vision went black and then he was letting out a near inhumane cry as he began cumming, his cock spurting onto his stomach and chest.

Die sort of gaped at him, not having expected the other to cum so quickly from this, but feeling like he should be proud because he got him off without so much as touching his dick. He thrust harder into him, groaning and then finally pushing in fully and starting to cum in an almost violent sort of manner, little jerks of his hips and whimpering cries.

Kyo flopped back against the bed, panting harshly as Die thrust into his now overly sensitive body. He shuddered and let out another moan when he felt the other filling him, reaching up to pull him down for a heated kiss.

Die leaned down over him and kissed him as deeply as he could given the issues of needing to breathe. After a few moments, he let out a breathy chuckle. "You're so... ahhh~"

He pulled back from the kiss and took a deep breath, trying to stop panting long enough to answer. "Uh huh...f-uck...baby" He groaned again and settled for stroking Die's arm, smirking up at him slightly.

Die let out a soft sound and pulled free of the other's body, watching for a moment as his cum started to leak back out of Kyo's ass. "Oh fuck, baby... god... it's gonna make me hard again."

Kyo licked his lips and gave Die a devilish grin, pushing the cum out a bit more. "Mm...I could get really get used to that feeling..."

Die watched the other's hole pucker a little more and cum start to leak out. He groaned, reaching down to run his fingers through it, cupping Kyo's balls just after. "Hey... you know what I want to see you do some time for me?"

He let out a moan as Die cupped his balls, his cock twitching a bit. "What's that, baby?"

"I want to walk in on you jerking off sometime... so badly. I think about it all the time." He slid down next to him and smirked a bit, leaning in to nuzzle him.

Kyo chuckled softly and turned to peck Die's lips. "Give me about ten minutes... leave and come back and I can make that happen."

Die stared at him for a moment and then smirked, leaning in and kissing him. "I've got to go and get beer. I just remembered, I'm out." He winked a bit.

He smirked and reached up to toy with a stray strand of Die's hair. "Oh really now? Is it really any fun though... if you're expecting it?" He laughed softly. "I mean, it'd be fun for me either way..." He sat there for a moment then grinned a bit. "Wanna know a secret?"

Die shrugged. "You jerking off is you jerking off, regardless. And after how many fucking years and I haven't walked in on you yet, the probability is so low." He smiled at him and then murmured, "Hmmm?"

Kyo shook his head, laughing. "I guess I'm always... careful." He nuzzled into Die a bit then grinned again. "When we're recording, you know that one unused lounge? I go in there at least twice a week and jack off - if not more - and I never even lock the door."

Die shivered a bit at the news and then started to laugh, faintly under his breath. "You're not the only one that jerks it in there. Kaoru has definitely come out of there looking a lot more relaxed than when he walked in. And I think we both know why."

The vocalist smirked a bit. "I know. I found his lube and nudie mags in there one time." He shook his head. "Interesting stuff that man likes to wank to...."

Die got that little look in his eye that he did with gossip, though he had some issues with admitting he liked it. "Oh...? Like what?"

Kyo knew Die all too well and just grinned. "I believe the title of the mag was something like 'Trans Tittie Fucking'...."

Die's mouth fell open and flapped a little before he flopped backwards and just grinned up at the ceiling. "Dude... oh... that's amazing. I love it. I knew there was something kinky in that man somewhere."

He rolled onto his side with a slight groan and laughed, his hand resting on Die's chest. "Yeah. I was rather amused by it. I couldn't stop snickering about it the entire day. Kaoru thought I was high or something."

Die pursed his lips a little and then murmured, "Want to know one of my huge secrets?" he asked softly.

Kyo glanced up at Die and nodded. "Mhm, tell me..."

"I dated a trans woman once. For about five months, actually." He held up his finger. "Actually, all of you met her at least five times. And, it was my first time getting fucked... and that's how I sort of admitted to myself that I love dick and I'd been lying to myself with the whole woman thing."

Kyo raised his eyebrow and blinked a bit. "Wow... wait... was it that one girl with the little snake tattoo on her wrist? What an interesting way to find out you like dick... I just more or less stumbled onto it one day."

Die nodded. "Yup, that's the one. Snake in more than one way." He chuckled. "Thing is... I even found out like the third date. I got a little drunk and a little gropey and-" he cut himself off and looked sort of embarrassed. "I'm sorry, you don't want to hear about my past conquests. That's just rude of me."

Kyo chuckled then waved his hand, grinning slightly. "I don't mind, baby. I know about more of them than you think I do." He looked slightly sheepish and buried his head against Die's neck. "So... you got a little surprise when you went under her skirt, huh?"

Die tilted his head a little and reached to rub his hands over Kyo's hair and back. "You'll have to explain that in a minute. But... back to this since you don't mind. Something like that... more that I had her up against the wall and was showing her how hard I was and she kept pushing back against me. Eventually... there was serious boner involved and it wasn't mine." He chuckled a bit.

Kyo snorted and shook his head, imagining what that situation must’ve been like for Die. "Well, all I can say is... I'm glad you didn't freak out and run away or something since it led to you liking dick... which put you in my bed."

Die laughed. "Mmm... I've always been a sort of open person and honestly, at that point, I was like... ah... what the fuck, why not, let's see if I can do this or if it scares the shit out of me. It took me a while to let her fuck me, but in the end... yeah... she knew what she was doing." He peered over at him. "Actually, boobs out to here." He held his hands out. "Dude... that's about all I miss from girls."

Kyo laughed. "I've come across a nice pair or two myself...." He leered a little. "I especially enjoyed cumming all over them."

Die's laugh filled the room and then he sang out, "Titty fuuckkkkkk!" before turning over and pushing against Kyo a little, his dick slightly hard again. "I'm terrible."

Kyo let out a laugh then smirked, snaking his hand down to tease Die's dick with his fingers. "Mhm... just awful."

Die bucked into his hand a little and then murmured, "Don't think you're getting out of it... how do you know more than I think you do about my exes?"

Kyo huffed slightly, pausing the actions of his hand to look up at Die then away again. "Let's just say...I've been keeping tabs on you." The faintest blush colored his cheeks. "I mean… with your conquests and all."

Die tilted his head a little. "Explain a little more..." he reached to run his hand over the other's cheek. "Have you been wanting me for a long time, baby?"

The blush got a little darker and he muttered out a, "Maybe", shifting a bit against Die. "I erm… I used to pester Nora and Kaoru a lot about what and who you were doing. But I always brought it up in ways that made it seem like just conversation." He paused and bit his lip, chewing a bit. "Of course there's also the fact that everyone thinks I'm a deep sleeper..."

Die tilted his head a little. "Wow... we've both been morons... for a long time." He shifted to press his hand against Kyo's cheek and held it there. "Stop chewing your lip, it's bad for it." He pressed his lips to Kyo's for a moment and then parted. "And, for what it's worth, I'm sorry you had to hear some of my conquests back in my not-so-discreet days."

Kyo chuckled softly and kissed Die back, nodding. "I agree..." He reached up and stroked his hand through Die's hair. "It's alright, sometimes it was... imagination fodder."

"Mmm... I'm sure it was, some of them anyway." He licked his lips a little and ran his hand down Kyo's side. "I promise not to sleep around on you. From the bottom of my heart."

Kyo blinked slightly and turned his head, nipping Die's bottom lip. "Good, because if you do, I may just have to strangle you.”

Die licked across his lips. "Mmm... I honestly will not. I only did once and it was years and years ago and... god... that was stupid of me."

He nodded slightly, nuzzling into Die. "Who with?"

"I um... well..." he sighed. "I was dating a girl back around family values... and she was sort of... well... I guess we sort of had a serious relationship. More serious to her than to me... and we had a huge fight before I left." He pursed his lips a little. "I sort of thought it was either over or mostly over and well... I told you my introduction to man dick..." he sighed. "Yeah, that was the cheating."

Kyo thought back to which girl he was talking about then nodded slightly. "Ahh..." He didn't really know what to say about it because he wasn't exactly the greatest one for relationships. "Well, at least the two of you had been fighting, so it wasn't straight up messing around."

"Mmm... there was no official break-up and when I got back... mind you, there were like five other people after that night on that tour... and well... she told me she forgave me when I got back and that she hoped we were still okay... and... it was awkward as ever living fuck." He sighed softly, shaking his head a little.

Kyo nodded and shifted a bit, leaning up to kiss Die's jawline lightly, rubbing his chest. "I can imagine...."

"Like I said, that's the time about which I changed what I was doing... and how I was doing it." He sighed and reached around to run his fingers up Kyo's back with a soft sound of pleasure.

Kyo hummed softly and nipped at Die's skin. "We all have our... moments of pure idiocy."

"Some bigger than others," he muttered out. "So... tell me... any huge fuck up moments on your list?"

He nuzzled into Die's neck and thought for a moment. "I screwed up in different ways... by being an emotionally cold dick about everything." He scratched his chin and shrugged slightly.

Die frowned a little. "I can see it... but I'm glad you're not doing that with me." He gently tugged his hair and gave him a soft smile that told him he loved him without saying it outright. Part of him wanted to thank Kyo for saying it back to him, the other part was almost afraid to mention it least Kyo take it back if he brought it up too much.

Kyo shifted and tugged Die on top of him, kissing him deeply, saying things that words could never say.

Die nuzzled the other, murmuring, "I'm glad we've finally stopped being idiots."

“Me, too, Die… me, too,” Kyo replied.

**To be Continued…**  



	4. Chapter 4

Die had been planning for this night for a very long time. He'd gone to his most trusted restaurant, the only place he'd go to when he had dates of any kind, and explained that he had an even more delicate situation than usual for a date and that they really needed to not be seen by the general populous. He requested his usual waiter, a friend of his. He'd honestly tried to plan everything down to a T so that he and Kyo would have the privacy they needed for the date. He had dressed up in his best pinstripe suit and was now standing at Kyo's door, a faint blush dusting his cheeks as he raised his fist and knocked. Maybe it was stupid since he was pretty much living there, but he felt like it added the final touch to the whole thing.

Kyo was putting the finishing touches on his hair for the evening, a sort of nervous energy bubbling through him that made him drop his brush at the knock. With a final look in the mirror at his all black suit and carefully styled hair, he turned and went to the door, opening it with a grin. "You look stunning." 

Die smiled when Kyo came to answer the door, giving him a sweeping bow and then stepped inside. He pulled a flower from behind his back, presenting a single white lily to the other. "I know it's cliché, but... here."

Kyo smiled softly and took the flower, twisting it around then leaning in to peck Die on the lips. "It's lovely... cliché or not. Wait here, I'll get a vase or something. I'm not even sure I own a vase." He laughed and pecked Die again then wandered into his kitchen, looking around before deciding on a wine bottle. 

Die chuckled. "A glass works just fine, trust me." He chuckled a bit and shook his head as he waited in the foyer, smiling. 

Kyo got the flower into the bottle then returned to Die, grinning at him, feeling like a school girl on her first date or something. "Ready to go?" He fidgeted with his tie a bit. 

Die smiled, leaning in and pressing his lips to the other's in a gentle sort of manner. He pulled back and gestured Kyo out with him. "No worries on the ‘people finding out that shouldn't’ front, by the way. I have my ways."

He leaned into the kiss, feeling calmer already. He had no idea why he was so worked up over this date. "Oh? You do, do you?" He slipped into his shoes and followed Die out, making sure the door was shut and locked behind them. 

Die led him out toward the elevator and then outside. Once outside, he led them to a nearby parking garage and then to his car, a sleek red number. He opened the door for Kyo. 

Kyo bowed slightly to the open door, unable to help smiling a bit foolishly. He slid into the car and ran his hand over the lovely interior, turning to Die once he joined him. "So, where are you taking me?" 

Die slid into the car and closed his door, starting the engine. "Sang Rose," he murmured softly. "Admittedly, my favorite date restaurant because I know they'll keep any secret."

Kyo raised an eyebrow. He'd heard of the place and its extensive client list. He smiled and reached over to rest his hand on Die's thigh more for contact than anything else. "I approve..."

"They sort of... cater to people like us. With secrets to keep and a public eye to stay out of." He drove them toward the restaurant, knowing they'd also be out front to take his car to valet parking.

He hummed and nodded slightly. "Very nice indeed..." He leaned back against the seat and contented himself with looking at Die's profile, a smile on his lips. 

Die just grinned, feeling like the evening was going splendidly already. After a short drive, they pulled up to the restaurant and he got out, handing the keys to the valet as he approached his car.

Kyo nodded slightly to the valet, somewhat nervous of the man. He stepped closer to Die and glanced up at him, a half smile on his lips. "Nice place..."

Die came around and they headed into the restaurant. "It is. And they're all super discreet." He opened the door and let Kyo in. Once inside, he was immediately recognized and the girl behind the counter gushed at him, leading them toward a small room in the back, ensuring they didn't go directly through the dining area, though if Kyo looked, he could see through the slats into the main area and see several largely known guests.

Kyo looked a bit uncomfortable as the girl at the counter recognized them, moving closer to Die when they started walking, He glanced through an open doorway and got a peek at some of the patrons, humming as he recognized a few. Once they were in the private room in back, he sat down looking a bit relieved. 

She left them there with two menus and then bowed and winked at Die. "Your request will be right up." She disappeared from the room, closing the door behind herself. Die glanced at Kyo and noted the discomfort. "Baby, don't worry about it. They know me because - like I said – it’s my favorite discreet place."

Kyo watched her leave then reached out to stroke his hand over Die's, grinning a bit shyly. "I know, I'm a bit... overwhelmed I guess you could say." He shook his head and leaned over to peck Die's lips softly. 

Die smiled, turning his hand to take Kyo's in his own. "Understandably... has anyone ever gone all out for you?" he asked, looking a little concerned that the other hadn't had someone do this for him before.

He squeezed Die's hand, flushing slightly as he shook his head. "No, they haven't, to be honest… and I've only ever put in such an effort once or twice." 

Die looked almost sad for a moment. "But... you deserve it so much. Why would no one treat you like the king you are?" He reached to gently caress his cheek, only dropping his hand when the door opened again and a waiter came in with a silver ice bucket with champagne and two glasses. It was uncorked and poured for them, the waiter quietly asking if they knew what they wanted. Die ordered the chicken alfredo and a salad with extra cheese.

Kyo gazed at Die, flushing even darker at his words as he leaned into his touch. No one had ever really said anything like that to him and it honestly made him feel damn near like crying. He jumped slightly when the waiter came in but managed a small smile and ordered the steak, medium rare, with grilled vegetables. 

The waiter slipped away and left them in peace, Die picking up his glass and leaning across the table toward Kyo, holding up the glass. "Toast, baby. To... us."

Kyo picked up his glass and held it up. "To us... to something unbelievably amazing." 

Die clinked glasses with Kyo and then took a sip. "I really do hope that we have something amazing." He shifted across the table and kissed him gently. "I love you."

Kyo sipped from his own glass then cupped Die's face, kissing him back. "Me, too...and I love you, too." He stayed there for a moment, letting his lips linger on Die's, his thumb caressing the other's face lightly. 

Die smiled against his lips, slowly deepening the kiss, happy they could have a normal date like this, that he didn't have to think about what he was doing, just do it, and all his secrets would be protected by these people.

Kyo moved his hand to the back of Die's neck as their kiss deepened. The whole atmosphere was beautiful and he loved being able to be normal. 

Die finally slowly ended the kiss and smiled as he pecked his lips a few more times. "Tell me... what do you think of when you think of the perfect date?"

Kyo smiled against Die's lips then pulled away finally. "This is about as perfect as it gets." He sat back and bit his lip for a moment before reaching into his pocket. "Speaking of dates and such. Er... well, I got this for you. It's not..." He coughed slightly. "It's just a way of saying, thank you... I guess." He handed Die a small red gift box. 

Die accepted the box and then smiled softly, looking it over with a faint little blush on his cheeks. He wasn't used to getting gifts from his male lovers. He started to unwrap the gift, tilting his head a little as he got down to the tissue, opening it and then picking the ring up out of the box. His eyes glittered as he slid it onto his finger and examined it, a look of awe on his face. "Kyo... it's beautiful. Thank you!" He stroked over it and then reached for him, planting another kiss on him and smoothing his hand over his hair.

Kyo shrugged slightly, trying and failing to contain a smile of near relief at Die's reaction. He had debated for hours on which one to get and had nearly given up when he finally spotted this one and knew it was the one. "I'm glad you like it." He kissed Die back, smiling against his lips. 

"Of course I like it," he murmured, running his hand over the other's hair one more time before he settled back. And in just enough time, too, because the waiter entered with a soft tap on the door, delivering their salads and refilling their champagne again, asking if they needed anything else.

Kyo couldn't stop smiling, feeling proud of himself because for once, he'd done right with something like that. When the waiter entered the room again with their salads, he settled again and pulled his fork out of its cloth napkin, adding a touch of the dressing they brought then taking a bite. 

Die rather shamelessly poured a ton of dressing on his and dug in with a gusto he rarely showed. He smirked a bit at Kyo, looking slightly embarrassed to have his mouth stuffed with salad for a moment. 

Kyo chuckled softly at Die's mouthful then went back to eating his own. "You're adorable, darling." 

Die chewed and then swallowed. "Sorry... I get so used to tour manners... at least maybe you'll understand." He flushed a bit. "Others er... haven't."

He shrugged lightly and grinned. "I understand... you eat what you can, while you can, and as fast as you can or not at all. Surprising how often 'not at all' ends up as the norm." 

Die made a little face. "Yeah... issues," he murmured softly. "Not at all is... a too often sort of thing for me, I think."

Kyo huffed slightly then waved his hand, taking another bite and chewing it before speaking again. "Ah well... at least we get hamburgers overseas, right?" He grinned a bit. 

Die laughed. "Actually, I sometimes miss a hamburger from overseas... those In-N-Out burgers were... A-mazing!" He pointed at his plate. "Though, I guarantee this place will blow it out of the water."

Kyo grinned. "I love those burgers... but yes, I think this place would throw us out if they heard us going on about American fast food." He shook his head and took the last bite of his salad, pushing the plate aside a bit.

A soft chuckle came out of his lips. "I doubt it... they've done some strange things for me in the past, I wouldn't put it past them to try to duplicate one if that's what I wanted."

Kyo was curious now, cocking his head and taking a sip of his champagne. "Oh, they have? Share?" 

"How does a penis ice sculpture flowing tequila sound? Along with tacos and refried beans?" He shook his head. "Crazy Mexican chick I dated once... had a thing for ice sculptures, dick, and her hometown. I tried... and failed. But hey."

The vocalist nearly choked on his drink, unable to hold in his laughter. "A penis ice sculpture? Nice..." He laughed a bit more then smirked. "I think next time you bring me here, you should have it done up with sushi served on naked people... and BDSM." 

"Tequila... out the penis." He pursed his lips a little and arched his eyebrow. "That... was the part that didn't go over so well." He barely got that out before Kyo suggested the sushi and BDSM and he choked a little before laughing. "Oh, hunny, if I'd known you were into that, then I would have taken you to L'amore instead!"

"I don't think tequila and penis would mix well..." Kyo laughed then shook his head, grinning. "I was kidding, baby, but tell me more about this L'amore."

Die looked a little embarrassed and then pursed his lips a little. "Well... first of all, tequila and penis does taste good. Just sayin'. And second... well... it's a club that caters to unique needs, such as sushi on clean, naked girls done up in shibari."

Kyo chuckled softly. "Maybe one night I'll bathe you in tequila and find out for myself..." He smirked slightly. "Sounds entertaining... but I'd rather eat sushi off of you." 

Die smirked a little and then shook his head a little. "As long as you promise to eat it quickly so I don't smell like fish after. You know how much I hate raw fish."

He laughed and took a sip of his drink. "You could always take a bath... or we could make it dessert sushi instead." 

Die leaned his head back a little and laughed. "Mmm... or just cucumber rolls." He reached to pour them more champagne, not feeling the buzz yet and wondering how Kyo was faring considering how much less he drank.

Kyo nodded at the drink, taking another sip then setting it down, feeling pleasantly warmed by the alcohol but thinking that he should be careful and wait for their dinner. He didn't think it'd be good to get smashed on a night like this. "Ha... that could work." He grinned then reached out and laid his hand on top of Die's, brushing his thumb over the ring he'd given him. 

Die smiled at him and looked down at the ring just after, a faint blush on his cheeks. "I sort of slacked in the gift department, I suppose. One flower and er... well... a bottle of warming lube." He laughed a bit awkwardly. "Sort of pales in comparison, you know?"

Kyo looked up at Die's words and shook his head, his brow furrowed slightly. "Just being with you is enough, as damned cheesy as that sounds." He gave his own awkward laugh then picked up Die's hand, bringing it to his lips, brushing them over the other's knuckles. "So what's this about warming lube?"

Die smiled, watching Kyo take his hand and feeling it as he brushed his lips over him. "Mmm... you're sweet..." he wet his lips a little and then leaned in closer. "It's supposed to enhance things. I've had it for a while and never used it. Thought... you could be the one I use it with." He shrugged a little. 

Kyo hummed softly and grinned a bit. "Mm...well, I'm definitely interested in trying it out. I've thought about it before but just never got around to getting any." 

Die opened his mouth to say something more, but the door slid open and their waiter entered with their main dishes. Everything was set out and their empty salad plates taken away. The waiter asked Kyo to cut into his steak to make sure it was correct, politely waiting.

Kyo did as the waiter requested, noting that the steak had just the right amount of pink. He murmured a thank you as he left then turned back to his food, going about cutting up his steak. "Looks delicious."

The waiter departed and closed the door behind himself. Die smiled sweetly at Kyo and dug into his food, trying to be more polite about it this go around.

Kyo watched Die, chuckling softly. "Don't hold back on my account, baby..." He dug into his own food, mmming with pleasure. 

Die snorted a little. "Yeah, I guess you should know how impolite I really am if you're going to bunk up with me, yeah?"

Kyo laughed and shook his head. "Yes, you're horribly impolite..." He went back to his food, plucking out a choice bite of meat and offering it to Die. 

He flushed a little and chuckled, knowing it was true. He was less than perfect on many things and eating food was definitely one of them. He leaned over to look at the other and tilted his head a little before taking the bite in his mouth.

Kyo smiled softly and took another bite for himself, studying Die's face. "Wanna hear something absolutely stupid I've always wanted to do?" 

Die chewed and then swallowed, smirking a bit just after. "Please do tell."

Kyo finished chewing and swallowed it down with another drink before speaking again. "I have always wanted to lounge in a bathtub with someone and eat strawberries with whipped cream and drink cold wine." He flushed a bit, realizing how damn gay that sounded. "It's incredibly… romantic and shit but..." he shrugged slightly, blushing a bit darker. 

Die gave him a smile and then pursed his lips. "Baby... if that's what you want, then I happen to know a little market that's open late that will have both strawberries and whipped cream... and probably even wine. And... I have a tub at my place. If you're willing to go there for the night."

Kyo gave Die a soft smile. "I think...that would be a lovely addition to our evening and I'm willing to go to your place anytime. If you want to change it up..."

Die gave him a little smile. "Then that's what dessert will be." He screwed up his nose in a cute little way. "Mmm... you're adorable... and I think I'm good for now, being at your place. But tonight, we use the tub."

Kyo huffed at being called adorable, his cheeks flushing again. "Stop it..." He smiled and took the last bite of his steak. "Sounds like a lovely dessert to me..." He hesitated a moment, debating on even bringing up the next thing. "...but for now, I have to pee."

Something passed over Die's eyes as he studied Kyo for a moment when he brought up what most of his past lovers would have concluded as being the demon topic. He swallowed thickly and then straightened his shoulders, eyes going back down to his plate so he didn't have to see Kyo's reaction. "Hold it."

The look the flickered in Die's eyes shot straight to his groin and he bit back a groan. He watched his lover's actions and almost smiled, but didn't, instead shifting in his seat, leaning back a little. "Very well..."

The knot in Die's throat loosened when Kyo just went along with it, though the difference in his own posture told of how this was obviously affecting him as well. He didn't want to be cruel to his lover, but he also didn't want to miss out on something that Kyo had announced to him. If they could wait until they were alone, he could be a bit more involved.

Kyo finished off the rest of his food before speaking again, glancing up at Die. "You worry too much, baby..." 

Die glanced up at him, mostly done with his food by the time the other spoke up. "What do you mean?" he asked softly.

He smiled and shook his head. "I can tell you're afraid that I'm going to run away or something just because of your fetishes or desires. But you're wrong. Why do you think I even brought that up?" 

The guitarist shifted a little and then sighed softly at Kyo's assessment. "I just... it's hard, you know? When I've been shunned so many other times and knowing that you've known me so long and not known any of these secrets. It's like... a whole other me that I keep to myself and out of our career and somehow it's just difficult for me to not worry about it."

Kyo studied the other for several moments before reaching out to take his hand again. "I understand, I just... I want you to know that you don't have to hold back from me and I want to make you happy." 

Die gave him a soft little look and squeezed his hand. "I know... and you do make me happy. You've already made me happier than anyone else ever has."

Kyo felt emotions go through him that he couldn't put a name to so he just smiled slightly. "Ditto..."

He took the last bite of his food and then put his fork aside. "Come on... let's get to the store and then my place. They already have my information and will bill me regardless. Let's say... a few of the people I've dated in the past liked to feel inspired by crime. I let them believe we dined and dashed and the staff played along. Now I just keep my credit card on file, it's easier."

Kyo laughed and took a final sip of his drink. "Alright, let's dine and dash then." He grinned and stood up, slipping his jacket back on then waited for Die. "Just how many different scenarios have you had set up here anyway?" 

Die made a little face and then shrugged slightly. "Too many. Though, I did ask for a different room than usual. Didn't want the taint of the past, you know?" He downed the rest of his glass of champagne, standing up and moving to Kyo, gently pulling him close and kissing him. He didn't want to escape this part of the date without a kiss, but public was too risky. 

Kyo nodded then kissed Die back, smiling against his lips, his arms wrapping around his waist. After a moment, he pulled back, nipping Die's bottom lip softly. "This has been so much more than I could've imagined.”

Die smiled softly at him and ran a hand over his lover's cheek. "I hope it continues to be... for a long while." He gently nudged the other under the chin and then opened the door, allowing Kyo out first.

Kyo smiled and nodded, turning and walking out, bowing slightly at their waiter before making his way out to the parking lot. Once they were out there and sort of out of sight, he caught Die's hand in his own and squeezed it, feeling rather like a school girl or something. 

The waiter slipped Die the receipt as he went past, smiling at Die and looking pleased. When they were outside and Kyo took his hand, Die couldn't have looked happier as he squeezed Kyo's hand. He led them toward his car, thinking to himself how he probably should have planned the champagne better and not drank so much of it given he was driving. Stupid rookie mistake. He moved to where the valet had parked his car and paused there, glancing up at Kyo and biting his lip a little. Kyo would be worse off than him at his point, he was sure, given how much less the other usually drank. "Umm... so... I didn't really think this one through too well. I'm tipsy and... probably shouldn't be driving."

It took Kyo a moment to understand what Die was saying then nodded a bit. "Ehh... maybe not? And I really don't think I could drive either." He shifted from foot-to-foot, wobbling the slightest bit. 

"Okay... cab." Die made sure his alarm was armed and he gestured. "Stay here for a second, I'm going to let them know I have to leave the car here overnight." He went back inside and told the desk staff his car would have to stay as he'd had a bit too much to drink. They said it was fine and told him not to bother with a cab, that one of their valets would drive them home in Die's car. He explained the side trip and they just packaged up some strawberries, a cold bottle of wine, and a container of whipped cream for him, sending him out with a boy named Nick to drive them home. He came back, beaming a little. "We're... being chauffeured home."

Kyo leaned against the car and waited for Die, raising an eyebrow at the items plus the boy. "I see..." He looked Nick over, hoping the boy knew how to keep quiet. "What service..." He smirked slightly and slid into the car, trying not to squirm too much. 

Die got in as well, leaving Nick alone in the front, both of them in the back. He settled in beside Kyo and put on his seatbelt, giving directions to his place. He settled back and slipped one hand onto the other's thigh and gently squeezed it.

Kyo bit his lip to keep from groaning, the alcohol working in his system and making him sensitive and well, flat out horny at this point, not to mention his full bladder. He glanced up at Nick then moved his own hand to rest on top of Die's, murmuring softly. "We should hire that place to cater our next tour... imagine all the fun that could be had."

Die chuckled a little. "Trust me, I've thought about it. What gets me is how few people actually know about it. No one else in the band or staff know and most of my friends haven't heard of it either. I just sort of stumbled into it on accident one night." He pushed his hand toward the other's inner thigh, not holding back on anything at this point.

Kyo let out a shaky breath, pushing against Die's hand. "Interesting... it must be completely word of mouth. I saw a few politicians in one of the rooms as we were walking by." 

Die nodded a little. "Every secret, so well kept... kept by the patrons because they need their own kept as well, and kept by the staff just because I suppose." 

Nick spoke up from the front. "Kept by the staff because they screen us all for people that actually give a shit about the fact that all of you shouldn't be harassed all the time by bullshit paparazzi."

Kyo blinked slightly then grinned, catching Nick's eye in the rearview. "Much appreciated." He shifted slightly and slid his hand over to Die's thigh, returning the other's previous treatment. 

Die's fingers crept higher, but not entirely up to completely inappropriate places yet. 

Nick smiled. "Always a pleasure." 

Die shifted a little to lean over and whisper, "How bad on a scale of 1 to 10 do you need to...?"

Kyo squirmed a bit more, licking his lips as he leaned into Die a bit and whispered back. "About a 7 and a half."

Die felt the shock of arousal buzz through his body like a slap to his groin. He almost didn't catch his groan. Closing his eyes for a moment, he huffed slightly and then squeezed Kyo's leg a bit more. He wouldn't ask for horrible things right then, not with them both being in their best clothing and a person they didn't know hanging out in his front seat.

Kyo shifted and squirmed in the seat, both from arousal and the need to relieve himself. He glanced out the window to see how close to Die's place they were and figured he'd be alright. Looking up at the other, he smirked slightly. "And how are you doing..?"

Die coughed slightly and moved Kyo's fingers about an inch down his thigh, letting him feel the fact that his dick had grown hard in his pants and was currently residing in the only place it could while hard in these pants... down the leg. 

Kyo licked his lips and trailed his fingers over said dick, smirking. "I see..." 

Die's hips jerked a bit involuntarily, a sound coming out of him that was not at all manly or called for. His lips twitched as he had the absurd want to laugh about his own sound, cheeks heating ever so slightly. "You will," he purred out.

Glancing to the front to make sure Nick was well focused on driving, Kyo slipped his hand along Die's thigh more, unable to help teasing him. "I know..." He leaned in closer to Die's ear. "I want to suck you off so bad right now." He flicked his tongue out to tease the other's earlobe before pulling away entirely. 

Die groaned quietly, head flopping back. 

Nick cleared his throat a little. "My discretion expands infinitely... just... so you know." 

Die looked a little helpless, not wanting to say anything.

Kyo looked up at a Nick and hesitated for a moment before unbuckling his seat belt, leaning down and nuzzle Die's crotch. He knew it had to be the alcohol in his system, because he just didn't care at the moment. 

Die let out a little sound, his eyes widening for a moment before he just sank into it, allowing this to happen. He pressed the other down a little, arching his hips up slightly.

Kyo snaked his hand up to unzip Die’s pants, freeing him from the confining material. Bending over more, he brushed his tongue over the tip, groaning softly.

Die grunted and shifted around to help Kyo get his dick out without hurting him. He gasped slightly when the other started licking at the tip of his dick. "O-oh," he hissed out. 

Kyo trailed his hand up Die's thigh, scraping him through the material of his pants as he started bobbing his head slowly, glancing up at Die's face as he did. 

Nick made sure to stare at the street, driving them a bit below the speed limit to ensure time. Die, for his part, pushed his hand into Kyo's hair, gently running his hands through it while the other sucked him, feeling like heaven right about then.

Kyo hummed softly around Die's cock, pressing his tongue into the slit with a slight groan as he tasted pre-cum. He lifted his head just enough to swirl his tongue around the tip then lowered it again, once more wrapping his lips around Die's length.

Die couldn't resist the urge and slowly tried to push Kyo down once he was going down on him again, seeing how far he could get him without gagging him.

Kyo practically smirked around Die's dick as he felt that hand pushing him and swallowed as best as he could, forcing his throat to relax as he dropped his head down fully, burying his nose into the hair at the base of the other's cock. 

Die watched, astonished, as the other took all of him in. He wasn't exactly small in the length category and he knew if he tried it, he'd have choked by now. Just the sight of the first person to ever take all of him in their mouth almost had him cumming. He choked out Kyo's name, hands flailing a bit to try to indicate he wasn't gonna make it if that continued, without having to actually say it.

Kyo just swallowed and worked his throat around Die's cock, breathing through his nose to keep from gagging himself. He moved his hand to grasp Die's, squeezing slightly as if to tell him it was okay to let go. 

It was obvious the other wasn't letting up on him at all with this. The problem being, he wasn't sure Kyo could take the fact that it'd been a few days since he'd had any time to actually get off and there'd be... quite a bit of it for him if he did cum. But he didn't have long to debate anything, his body reacting for him instead. He let out a moan worthy of porn, hips jerking the smallest amount as he started to cum.

When the first spurt hit his throat, Kyo groaned and concentrated on swallowing everything Die had to offer, eyes widening with surprise at it seemed to just keep coming. He finally had to pull back some to breath, letting the rest hit him in the face instead. When Die finished, he turned and looked up at him, licking his lips with a smirk. "Die..." 

Die let out a little whimper at the volume of what he had released. He swallowed thickly and then gestured Kyo up toward him, moving to wipe the cum off his face with his thumb, slowly allowing Kyo to lick it back off if he so desired. "It's... been a few days," he admitted quietly, earning a chuckle that was covered by a cough from their driver.

Kyo shifted towards Die, chuckling softly as he pulled the other's hand to his lips, cleaning the mess from it. "Mm... I can tell. All the better, baby." He sat back and looked around, spotting a few napkins poking out of the bag from the restaurant and grabbing them, wiping his face off. He leaned over and kissed the other softly, murmuring against his lips. "Nine..."

Die huffed out a soft groan, reaching down to fondle Kyo's crotch. He rubbed over his balls and then lightly over his dick. "We're close," he murmured softly, "just a little longer." He glanced out to see they were about a block from his complex.

Kyo shuddered and pushed into Die's hand, biting his lip to keep from moaning out too loudly though it was probably pointless to keep it to himself. Their driver clearly knew what was going on by this point. He distracted himself from the growing urgency of needing to piss plus the fact that his dick was achingly hard by burying his face against Die's neck, nipping and licking along his jaw. "Fuck, Daisuke... you drive me insane."

Die groaned softly. "I'd well... drive my dick into you, but there wouldn't be time to finish before we got home." He sniffed slightly and rubbed at Kyo's hair a little. 

They came to a stop and Nick murmured, "I know the garage here, what's your parking number and I'll let you out here... it's faster." Die opened the door. "Ninety-six," he replied before he got out of the car and waited on Kyo to come out after him. 

Kyo let out a soft groan at the thought then took a breath, sliding out when Die opened the door. He turned and reached into his pocket, pulling out a few large bills and pressing them into Nick's hand. "Thank you..." He turned and moved towards Die, shifting slightly in an attempt to make his very obvious boner not so obvious. 

Die leaned back in. "Just leave the keys in the glove box and lock the doors. I have a spare set to get in." He just hoped he wasn't doing something stupid. But he knew who to blame if it went missing at least. He headed into the apartment, biting his lip ever so slightly to keep himself from talking until they were out of public view.

Kyo followed Die closely, hands stuffed into his pockets to keep from fidgeting too much. The pressure in his bladder had gotten worse when he'd stood up and he couldn't be happier that they were almost to Die's apartment. When they'd gotten on the elevator, he glanced at Die and let out a breath. "So uhm... think your car will still be there?" 

"If it isn't... guess who's paying for it?" He arched an eyebrow at him and then shrugged. Once they were in the elevator, he glanced at the camera. "Stupid camera... I'd have you be naughty as sin, but... again... video would be everywhere. Speaking of which, you never showed me that."

"Mm... true... it'll probably be fine." He chuckled softly and looked up at Die, smirking. "I'd love to be naughty in here but, yeah, camera." He scratched his nose a bit and shifted. "Ah... I didn't, did I? You'll have to remind me when we go back to my place." 

Die nodded and the elevator dinged. Die made his way to the apartment and took his time opening the door, even ‘oops’ing about the keys a few times just to see how much worse it made Kyo in the process. It was really turning into a porno scenario and he couldn't have found it more amusing... or arousing.

Kyo fidgeted and squirmed as Die fumbled with the keys, biting his lip to keep from groaning at the "oops". "Problem with the keys? Please tell me you have the right ones." 

Die finally slid the right one into the lock and smirked at him. "I'm torturing you for my own means," he replied quietly, opening the door and then slipping inside and making sure he was in the way of Kyo getting to the bathroom. 

Kyo growled lowly, the situation becoming quite desperate. "Evil..." He followed Die inside the door, toeing his shoes off then looking at him, noticing his was in the way. "Very evil..." He stood there, gritting his teeth, his hand coming to press against his crotch slightly. "Tell me... how exactly do you want this or rather me... to go?"

Die smirked a little and wet his lips slightly. He turned to Kyo and tilted his head a little. "Somewhere dirty... ah!" He moved to him and began to undo his pants, pushing them off his hips. "Leave the boxers."

Kyo huffed and kicked his pants off the rest of the way, picking them up and laying them over the back of a chair, going ahead and doing the same with his jacket and shirt, standing there finally in just his boxers, shivering a bit. "Die..." 

Die pulled the other to him, gently kissing his lips as he pushed his own jacket off, tossing it aside to pick up off the chair later. He pulled back and gestured Kyo after him. "Any dirty whim? Any at all?"

Kyo kissed Die back with just a hint of impatience there. He considered the question for a moment then licked his lips. "You're running the show tonight, baby... but... I want you to choke me." He looked at Die, flushing slightly at the request... hoping it was alright. 

Die winked at him. "That, I can do." He headed for the bathroom, leaving a trail of shoes and socks and pants and finally his shirt, leaving him in boxer briefs and a wife beater. He stepped into the bathroom and settled down on the closed toilet lid, confessing, "I've done unspeakable things in here... do something unspeakable."

Kyo shivered again at the very thought, eagerly following Die into the bathroom, enjoying the shedding of clothes. When the other sat on the toilet, thus blocking it from his use, he quirked an eyebrow up, licking his lips. "Baby, I'm so close to just pissing myself and you're in my way. So either move or I'm going to piss on you." He ran his hand over his crotch again, groaning.

Die arched an eyebrow at him. "You can think of something more fun than that... come on. It's a room suited for being honestly hosed down." He pointed at the drain in the floor. "Have fun with this." He knew it was for him, but he didn't see how it couldn't at least make someone's heart thump to do something dirty in the wrong place.

Kyo chuckled softly and took a step back, considering his options before moving over the counter and hopping up onto it, leaning his back against the mirror and looking at Die as he pulled his dick out of his boxers, managing to give it a couple of strokes before spreading his legs and letting loose a stream of piss into the floor, groaning lowly with sheer relief. 

Die watched Kyo, wondering what on earth he was doing. He sort of leered at Kyo as he started to piss on the floor. Die moved from the toilet then, closer to the counter, leaning in and stroking Kyo's thigh as he partook in Die's perhaps most interesting fetish. "Doesn't it feel good? Just letting go? Doing this wherever? In such a dirty fashion?"

Kyo groaned and nodded, pushing the stream out harder, watching it hit and spatter on the floor. "Yes..." He turned to look at Die, smirking at him as he managed to stop the stream. "Gimme your shirt." 

Die arched an eyebrow at him, but pulled it off and handed it over to him, reaching just after to touch the tip of Kyo's cock, rubbing around the small drop of piss there for a moment before pulling his hand away.

Kyo let out a moan when Die touched him, unable to help the dribble of piss that leaked out when he did. He took Die's shirt though and tossed it down, licking his lips as he started pissing again, this time onto the other's shirt, groaning as he pushed the rest of it out, the end coming out in little spurts. "Ah... God."

Die chuckled. "Dirty, dirty boy." He rubbed his hands over the other's thighs and chuckled softly as he squeezed out the last bit of piss. "Feel better, baby?" he asked softly. He shifted toward him and pressed up against the sheer front of the counter, his dick hard and feeling nice pressed against the cool counter.

Kyo reached out and ran his hand over Die's arm, licking his lips. "Yes, lots... aside from being harder than hell." He gestured down to his cock which was swollen and slightly red. The act of pissing on things not really doing anything for him so much as Die's reaction to it. "What about you?" 

Die licked his lips a little and then took Kyo's hand, guiding it down to his dick. He arched into his hand and moaned softly. "Let's make this not typical... you fuck me... and I'll choke you when I think the time's right."

Kyo wrapped his hand around Die's cock, stroking him slowly and nodding. "Sounds good to me baby... but don't hold back when you do."

Die peered up at Kyo, his eyes reflecting a bit of an issue with that, but he nodded anyway. It was fine, he knew he could hold back when the time came.

Kyo smiled almost softly and leaned forward to nip at Die's bottom lip as his hand worked his length. "I trust you..." 

Die arched into the touch of the other's hand and groaned happily. It always just felt so right with Kyo and that was something he honestly cherished.

Kyo toyed with Die's dick a bit longer then let go, grasping the other man's hand and pulling him into the bedroom, going ahead and getting the lube out. "Prep yourself for me baby?"

Die plopped down on the bed and managed to get all of his clothing off and then grabbed the lube that Kyo offered him. "Always," he murmured, taking the lube and uncapping it, spreading some on his fingers. He gave Kyo a sultry look.

Kyo watched Die, smirking a bit, leaning over and kissing him deeply as he pushed the other's hand downward. "You're so damn sexy Die." 

Die chuckled softly and then pushed his hand down to between his legs. One finger slowly slipped into his ass, a moan bubbling up from his throat. He threw his head back and he smirked up at the ceiling. "I once did this on the bus... everyone was on board while I fingered myself in my bunk."

Kyo let out a sound at the sight then again at Die's admission, his hand slipping down to his own cock, stroking it a few times. "Oh yeah? What were you thinking about?" 

"How much I wanted to be fucked," Die hissed out. "God... I wanted someone to fuck the hell out of me... and there wasn't anyone." He shrugged. "So I used my fingers."

Kyo chuckled softly and shook his head. "Too bad you didn't have the balls to crawl into my bunk with me... I'd have fucked you straight into the middle of next week." He narrowed his eyes slightly. "Just as I'm about to do now."

Die let out a groan. "God... if I'd known so long ago. My sex life would have been so much better." He pushed a second finger in and groaned, his dick twitching with pleasure.

He nodded, reaching out to wrap his fingers around Die's dick again, stroking him slowly as he leaned down to flick his tongue over the other's nipple. "The feeling's mutual, baby."

Die huffed out a groan as the other started to stroke his dick. He shivered a little, feeling his nipples start to harden with his arousal. "Fuck," he hissed out, shivering slightly as he pushed his third finger in.

Kyo couldn't help touching his lover, moving his mouth to the other nipple, drawing the pert bud between his teeth as he swiped his thumb over the tip of Die's dick, glancing down to see a third finger disappear into his body. 

Die groaned the moment that Kyo's mouth touched his nipple. He reached to push his head down against himself even more. "O-oh god," he whispered softly, thrusting his fingers a few times before he pulled them out. "Give it to me, baby."

Kyo bit onto Die's nipple before pulling back, grabbing up the lube and smearing some on his cock before grasping Die's thighs and positioning himself between them, pausing briefly to sweep his eyes over the gorgeous sight under him then thrust his hips forward, sinking himself to the hilt in Die's body with a loud moan. 

Die let out a sharp cry as the other thrust into his body, shivering slightly and reaching to clamp his hands on Kyo's biceps, clinging to him. "Fuck... oh god... yes... fuck me."

Kyo slid his hands up to Die's hips and got a tight hold as he started at a frantic pace, pounding him into the mattress as inhumane sounds ripped from his lips. "Fuck! Die!" 

Die's face instantly went slightly red, his arousal skyrocketing incredibly as the other began to fuck him so hard. He let out a series of noises that should really have belonged to a girl rather than a grown man, humping upward over and over.

Die's noises only served to push Kyo further, his hips snapping hard against Die's body, the sound of skin against skin echoing around the room. 

Die let out a string of high-pitched curses, his head falling backwards. "Oh god! Oh fuck! Oh, KYO!" he cried out as he felt his body ramping up toward cumming. He was already so close it was almost pathetic.

Kyo grabbed one of Die's legs, pushing it up against his chest and changing the angle of his thrusts, suddenly wanting to see the other lose it without him even touching his dick. 

Die let out a moan that was significantly manlier than the rest of the sounds he'd been making, his hips snapping up. After a moment, he started to cum, his jizz splattering all over his own stomach and chest.

Kyo groaned and let go of Die's leg in favor of running his hand over Die's dick, smearing it through the mess he was still in the process of making, his pace barely slowing. "Hnng... Die!" 

Die whimpered a little and then moaned as the other ran his hand over his dick. It was so sensitive and he loved it. "Oh god," he hissed out. "Fuck me... god fuck me and fucking scream for me, baby!"

Kyo gladly complied, placing his hands on either side of Die and ramming into him as hard as he could, shuddering as he repeatedly filled the other. He was panting heavily and getting so close to his own release, he knew it would take a little more. "Fuck yes! Dai~suke!!" 

Die lifted one slim leg, wrapping it around the other and arching up into him so that his dick started to hit his prostate. Once again, those special noises began pouring out of him, his pleasure quite intense again.

Kyo moaned and shifted his hand to hold onto Die's leg, his nails biting into the skin there. He couldn't think anymore, pleasure fogging his brain as his hips did the work for him then suddenly he let out another beastly cry akin to the ones he did onstage and he was cumming deep within Die's body, shaking from the effort as spurt after spurt filled the other's passage. 

Die let out a pleased moan as the other started to cum, the sound only spurring him on to feeling absolutely amazing. He let out a soft whine and then started trying to pull Kyo down on top of himself, panting quietly.

Kyo slumped against Die when he pulled him, groaning softly as he still moved his hips though not as forceful as before, his body shuddering. "Hng..." 

His arms wrapped around Kyo and he buried his face in the other's neck, trembling slightly. "You're... oh god. This... fuck."

Kyo slipped his arms under Die and held him close, pressing his forehead against the other's hair. He opened his mouth to speak but only ended up letting out a soft sound, simply nodding and hoping Die understood. 

Die just stroked the other's back gently, looking pleased and rather sated, actually. A slow smile came across his face.

Kyo sighed softly and shifted, finding Die's lips with his own and kissing him deeply. He pulled away after a moment and looked into the other's eyes. "Die... I… can't even put into words what I want to say... what... my heart wants to say. It goes so far beyond...'I love you'..." He flushed and trembled a bit as he practically bared his very soul to the other. 

Die kissed him back happily, feeling like it was the most intimate thing he'd experienced so far. He listened to the other's confession, the look on his face one of pure bliss. He wet his lips a little and gently caressed the other's cheek. "You never cease to make the happiest man on the planet."

Kyo nuzzled into Die's hand, closing his eyes and smiling softly. "I hope I never do..." 

He gently stroked over the other's cheek and then slid his hand down his chest. "You won't... you couldn't." He gave him a gentle smile. "I just hope I never disappoint you."

He turned and nuzzled Die's cheek, shaking his head. "I doubt that’s possible, baby..." He laid for a moment the chuckled softly. "Next thing you know… we'll be writing love songs."

Die held up his hand. "Nooooo, oh no we don't. The fans would abandon us because they'll claim to have no idea what love is and say they don't 'feel' us anymore."

Kyo snorted and shook his head. "Kaoru wouldn't let it even get that far."

"Definitely not." He laughed softly and then reached to gently go back to hugging the other. "I love you," he murmured quietly.

"Mm and I love you, too." He gladly curled back into their embrace, forgetting anything else and letting the world stop spinning for that moment that he never wanted to end. 

Die peered up at him and then looked embarrassed. "Uh... I totally forgot to do what I promised. So... you know what that means, right?"

Kyo turned and kissed Die's reddened cheek. "Mm I forgot, too, but... what's that?" 

"You'll just have to fuck me again so I can do it this time!" He smirked slightly.

Kyo laughed and shifted slightly, pulling out of Die's body. "I think... that will require a few things... like water, another piss, and maybe something sugary!" 

Die smirked at him and then patted him slightly. "Yeah, that's a good point." He pinched his side slightly. "Mmm... we'll go pee first."

Kyo nodded and moved away from Die, wincing slightly as they full disconnected, sticky mess and all, letting out an unmanly squeak when Die pinched his side. "Works for me..." 

Die let out something that resembled his orgasm sound, but was supposed to be a laugh. He winked and then got up, groping Kyo's ass on the way past him. "Sexy beast."

Kyo snorted then growled, shaking his ass for Die's benefit then returning the favor, getting a handful of the other's ass, which was really all it was. "Back at ya, baby." He followed him into the bathroom and went to the sink, grabbing a washcloth to wipe most of the mess off of himself then tossing it to Die. "Just so we won't be so sticky."

Die took the washcloth and then peered at the floor, making a bit of a face. He'd forgotten he hadn't cleaned the floor from Kyo's previous bladder explosion. His shirt was still lying there soaked and the smell of stale piss was in the room. He grabbed his shirt and tossed it in the tub, then took the sprayer from the tub and turned it on, pointing it at the floor and washing away all Kyo had done the first time. Then he moved to put it back, sitting down on the toilet and not bothering to tuck his dick in. He glanced at Kyo and blushed a little. "My guilty drunk pleasure... is doing this." He started to go, piss just sort of splattering out on the tiles in front of him, some of it hitting the wall and in general it just making a big mess for what wasn't even a full bladder.

Kyo watched Die and chuckled softly as he cleaned the mess up then cocked his head when the other sat on the toilet and started going. "Well... I could think of worse guilty pleasures." With that, he grinned wide and stepped near Die though not in the path of his stream and reached down, grasping his dick and letting his own piss free with a sigh, just taking some sort of basic pleasure in all out pissing on the floor. 

Die's eyes moved to Kyo, watching him with obvious interest. It wasn't something he could hide; he'd never been able to. It was why he'd stop midstream and suffer just to get the fuck out of the men's room if someone else came in to piss. He chuckled. "Learning to enjoy it on some level?"

Kyo snorted and finished up, shrugging. "Pissing on things amuses me right now but... the fact that it does turn you on can turn me on as well, if that makes sense."

"Half the fun is the amusement... and the dirty aspect of it. Things you're told you shouldn't do since you were a child." He leveled his gaze with Kyo's eyes and smirked. "Ask Kaoru, I'm pretty sure he at least understood it as a child with all his stories of peeing on people's hats and off balconies." He stood up and then grabbed the sprayer again, cleaning up their messes.

Kyo laughed and nodded. "I can see that... and you've got a great system here to indulge in your dirty little fetish." He said the last part with a wink then grabbed a bit of toilet paper to dab his dick off before tossing it and wandering back out towards Die's kitchen, glancing at the strawberries on the counter. "We never did have that bubble bath." 

Die chuckled a little and followed the other into the kitchen. "Oh shit! God... I completely got sidetracked with you squirming and all." He blushed. "But, bubble bath sounds good to me. Come on." He grabbed everything and then headed for the bathroom again. He held up a hand. "Hold on." He shut the door and quickly went about digging some stuff from under the counter. First, he dried the floor and then cleaned off his shirt, hanging it up over the towel rack and then started to draw the bath, putting in some bubble bath that smelled like cherry blossoms and patchouli. Then he set up a few candles and lit them with a lighter from his pants in the corner of the room. Next he put the strawberries on the small side area built for putting your book or whatever on once you were done with your bath. And finally, he opened the wine and poured it into the two glasses he'd grabbed. Putting those on the small table as well, he shut off the water and then opened the door, flicking off the light. "Come in."

Kyo blinked, a little startled at Die's sudden actions and the door closing on him. He chuckled softly as he heard the bath running then grinned when Die opened the door to reveal the epitome of a romantic bath, complete with candles and fragrant bubbles. "Oh...wow..."

Die beamed at him and led him in, careful to avoid the piles of clothing and still slightly damp areas of the floor. He chuckled as he helped Kyo into the bath. "From dirty to romance in what... three minutes?"

Kyo smirked and leaned up to kiss Die on the cheek. "Yep, all that's missing are the rose petals and violin music." He grinned and stepped into the bath, sinking into the scented water with a sigh. "Mmm... I haven't had a proper soaking bath in forever.”

Die settled in opposite Kyo and he smiled softly. "You really should more often," he murmured. "It's relaxing and it's helpful, especially right before we leave on a tour."

Kyo hummed softly and dipped his head down under the water the came back up, turning to lean against Die's chest. "Well, I've gone to the local baths a few times but it's difficult to catch them at a totally dead time and my tattoos are frowned upon."

Die nodded and held up his hand. "I got turned away after getting this. They're really fucking picky about it." He ran his hands over Kyo's tattoos. "Well... Die's Bath is open to you any time, baby. We enjoy tattoos here."

Kyo chuckled softly and grabbed Die's hand, pressing his lips to the inked portion of skin. "Mm, I will probably continually take you up on that offer. Little known fact about Kyo number eleven something: He loves baths." He tilted his head forward, giving Die a better view of his tattooed skin. 

Die allowed Kyo to kiss his skin and then smirked softly when the other showed him more of his skin. He reached to rub over his back, enjoying the feel of it and the look of his fingers over his skin. "You're gorgeous... every bit of ink and every single scar... I love every inch of you."

Kyo shivered as Die's hands ran over his skin, a blush creeping up on his cheeks. "I'm glad." He moved the other's hand to his chest, over the worse of the scars there. "I have so many." 

Die's fingers traced them by memory, so many hours he'd spent looking at Kyo without the other even knowing how he was looking exactly. He leaned in to kiss his shoulder blade gently. "I can't say I know them all... but I know most of them." He closed his eyes and then whispered, "The nights you passed out after you got off the stage..." this was hard for him to admit and his throat sort of choked up on him, "Someone took care of you... cleaned your wounds and bandaged you up... that someone... that was me." He was very quiet by the end, his cheek resting on Kyo's shoulder.

Kyo sighed softly as Die touched him where he'd practically ripped himself up, clawing at inner pain that nothing could reach. At the other's confession, he blinked and swallowed a few times, something about it sinking deep into his heart. "Oh...Die...." He reached back and ran his fingers through Die's hair, blinking a bit too much as he murmured. "Thank you."

Die's lips touched Kyo's neck gently and he managed a tiny little smile, though it was a bit shaky. "I never knew how to tell you... I always thought you'd maybe be mad at me for the fact that I sort of did it behind your back... and that you were always out cold when I would."

Kyo let out a choked sort of sound then cleared his throat and shook his head. "I don't know how I would've reacted then... but I'm glad you went to all that trouble. God knows the infections I could have gotten... I guess I just always assumed it was Nora or some staff member." He petted Die's hair and swallowed again. "Somehow though... the fact that _you_ did it, even though you must've been exhausted yourself... just... thank you."

Die closed his eyes, trying not to let the tears overflow that wanted to, trying not to show just how weak he was with this. He swallowed thickly and then whispered out, "I've always been there for you, Kyo. Through thick and thin, it's always been me. No one else ever knew. And it never mattered that I was exhausted. I couldn't let you hurt yourself like that and then just leave it. It hurt me too much to leave it."

Kyo opened his mouth to respond then just shook his head and turned, wrapping his arms tightly around Die's waist and burying his head against the other's chest, ignoring the fact that he knew his shoulders were shaking. He couldn't hold it in, his emotions were too strong. Just knowing that someone had cared when he was at his lowest points and felt worse than scum on someone's shoe... it was too much for him. Especially since that person was Die.

Die held him close, his own tears escaping down his cheeks, a faint tremble in his own frame from it as well. "I love you... I've always loved you." He buried his face in the other's hair and just held him there, stroking over his back gently. 

Kyo practically clung to Die, quietly sniffing as he whispered hoarsely. "I love you, too... I'm so sorry... it took so long."

Die just smiled softly and rubbed over his hair gently. "It's okay... we're together now. That's what matters." He framed Kyo's face with his hands and leaned in to kiss him again, just treasuring lips against lips before he pulled back and nuzzled his nose against Kyo's own. His fingers moved to run over one deep scar. "This one... I'm so sorry. I couldn't do anything about it. It needed stiches and I didn't know how until the next tour."

Kyo gave Die a somewhat watery smile and kissed him back softly then glanced down at the scar in question, reaching up to run his fingers over it. "I thought it might but at the time... I didn't ca- wait, you've stitched me up before?" 

Die flushed a little and then nodded. "Yeah... this one," he touched it, "and this one," he touched one on his abdomen that was nothing but a faint line. "That one was second... I did a much better job. It was easy, you always left them covered until the next show and most of them you did the worst were the last shows. So I got the quick dissolving ones and by the time you uncovered it, you probably just thought it was a piece of the gauze or something."

Kyo's hand followed Die's, his eyes blinking. "...Wow. I knew some of them had been stitched but again… I just assumed staff or even a doctor. I never asked." He looked up at Die and leaned in to kiss him again, drawing this one out, softly whispering, "I love you," against his lips. He knew then that he wanted to do something big for Die, he just didn't know what yet. "You're amazing Daisuke." 

"I just... I care," he murmured softly. Nuzzling the other gently, he smiled. "You know... those nights... the nights I took care of you, I slept better than I usually did."

Kyo smiled up at him. "Really? Why's that?" He reached up and cupped the other's cheek, caressing his skin lightly. 

"Because I knew you were at least taken care of. I didn't lay there worrying about what was going on or how you'd wake up in the morning. It left me with only the worry of if you were okay... and that never goes away." He reached to run his hand over the ear Kyo used to have all his piercings in. "Tell me... why'd you take them all out?"

He leaned into Die's touch, blushing and somehow feeling guilty for ever having made him worry. At the question about his piercings, he looked away and sighed softly. "Her again… she hated them... threatened to pull them out in my sleep." 

Die's mouth tightened a little and he frowned. "I'll never tell you what to do like that. You're not one to be caged like that... you're like... a gazelle. It's a tragedy to see a gazelle in a small pen with nowhere to run, no freedom to move as it pleases."

Kyo's mouth widened into a grin at the analogy. "Mm I appreciate that... but I prefer lion." He nuzzled into Die's neck, rubbing a hand over the other's chest. "I feel freedom with you. More so than when I was alone. It's like you've cut the ropes that kept me trapped within myself." 

Die smiled softly at the other. "You know... I have spent most of the time I've been in love with you wishing I'd hear something like that from you. And here we are, you telling me this and it just makes me the happiest man." He reached to run his fingers over Kyo's arms, eyes following the path until he got to one wrist, a faint frown coming over him for a second before he covered it. He still remembered that night, that show... and how terrified he'd been at how much Kyo slashed at that wrist. And he remembered uncovering the bloody mess later that night, taking the chance when the other had simply gone to bed, and he still remembered how he'd almost lost it then, seeing the beautiful tattoo shredded, the blood, the gashes, and knowing he couldn't even begin to fix it without waking the other man. He'd pretty much had to clean it and walk away and that had been the hardest thing he'd done in all his years.

Kyo smiled softly then followed Die's fingers with his eyes, his smile sliding from his lips and becoming a frown as he pulled his wrist away to look at the ugly scar there. He swallowed painfully and leaned into Die, sighing softly. "I feel like... I owe my life to you." 

Die closed his eyes for a moment and then reached for his arm again, pulling it to his body and gently running his fingers over the scars there. "You know the maybe best and worst part of all of this?"

Kyo licked his lips and turned to look up at Die. "What's that?" 

"Some of the best and worst nights of my life have been things you probably never considered to have been connected to me at all." He gave him a wry little smile. "I guess... in a way... some would consider all I've done to be fucking crazy."

Kyo hummed and shook his head, shifting so he could place a few soft kisses on Die's neck. "You are fucking crazy, baby... but that aside, what exactly sort of things do you mean?" 

"Well... this night, for example." He touched his wrist again. "Was quite possibly the worst night of my life, closely rivaled by the night I actually thought you might have overdosed on something. Of course, I was wrong... but... that does not change how I thought things were at the time."

Kyo winced slightly at the thought of having caused Die any sort of pain and he nuzzled into him, sighing. "I had no idea anyone even... noticed. I suppose I was too locked in my own personal hell to realize that I wasn't alone."

"And best... the times I could make you smile at me even through your own blinding haze. The days you'd actually tell me things that you hadn't told anyone else. And one night... I thought it was the best night of my life... but I was wrong, because the first night we got together and the night you finally told me you loved me are the best... but what I thought was the best was the night you got trashed with me and... well... I don't honestly think you remember shit. But... you kissed me. Of course, then you puked on me, but... hey, worth it."

Kyo listened to Die talk, smiling a bit then letting out a laugh at the kissing part. "Oh, no, I really don't remember kissing you but I do remember getting trashed with you and then kissing some..." he blinked up at Die, "...chick. Oh man, that was you!" He laughed louder this time. 

Die snorted a little. "Oh dear sweet, Kyo... if you thought I was a girl then you must have thought I was a chick with a raging hard-on pressed against your fucking hip." He laughed. "You sort of squirm a lot when you're drunk and I damn near had to carry you back to the room that night."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "I have the tendency to not pay attention when I'm drunk. Probably would've noticed when you started to stick it in my ass though." He grinned then tugged Die down for a kiss. 

"Hey! I never went for it... I could have, granted. But I wasn't about to. It only would have hurt me more in the end." He leaned in to allow the kiss to happen, sighing softly and then remembering the strawberries and wine mid-kiss.

Kyo snorted then kissed Die before raising an eyebrow when the other seemed to stop. "Uh... baby? What? Do I have bad breath all of a sudden?" 

Die chuckled. "No, I just remembered the strawberries and wine. I didn't mean to stop." He smirked a bit and shook his head. "Apparently I can only think on one thing at a time right now."

Kyo grinned and reached for their wine, handing a glass to Die then grabbed the strawberries as well. "Well, that's funny because I was thinking about how nice your lips would taste with a hint of strawberries." 

Die flushed slightly. "Well... I have to say, I think they taste marvelous with strawberry, but that's just me." He smirked a little and took the glass, then a strawberry, holding it to Kyo's lips for him to take a bite first.

Kyo laughed softly then leaned forward and bit into the strawberry, mming at its sweetness. He smirked then flicked his tongue out, catching the rest of the berry with it, making sure to graze over Die's fingers as he did. "I've got to hand it to that restaurant, those are some delicious strawberries." He turned and picked one up for Die, holding it to his lips in the same manner as Die did his own.

"Baby, they're amazing. Period. That's why I use them." He smirked slightly and then leaned in to get his strawberry, making a show of eating it and moaning as he did so.

Kyo hummed then watched Die eat the strawberry, letting out a little groan of his own as the other made it down right erotic. "...Tease." He reached for another, but instead put it between his teeth with most of it sticking out. 

Die licked his lips when he was done, smirking. "I'm always a tease, my sweet." He chuckled and then moved to take the other half of the strawberry, kissing Kyo gently after he had it in his mouth and then pulling back and chewing it, swallowing.

Kyo chewed his bite then took a sip of wine. "I won't disagree with you there... strutting about on stage, humping your guitar." He smirked. "Letting your hair flow like a damn shampoo commercial. You don't know how many times I wanted to catch that hair and pull it ‘til you screamed..." 

Die let his mouth hang open for a moment and then laughed. "Humping my guitar?! I have never!" But the next part shut him up and he chuckled. "Mmm... I don't think I'd react well to that, but you could try. Last person who pulled it got smacked."

Kyo snorted. "You have so… and that's too bad, but I might try it sometime. If you smack me though, I'll smack you back." He grabbed another berry and held it up for Die. "What else don't you like?" 

Die laughed. "That could be... eventful. Slappy-cuffs." He eyeballed the other. "Please do explain how I've humped my guitar and then I'll tell you other things I don't like."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "The way you move your hips when you're playing it sometimes. Not to mention the look of pure bliss on your face."

Die flushed a little. "Okay, I see your point. But if I were legitimately humping it, fans would fucking cream their panties." He chuckled a little and then took a long drink from his wine glass before leveling his gaze with Kyo. "Things I hate... rape scenarios. Let's say..." he looked a little uncomfortable, "it brings back some unwanted memories."

Kyo snorted. "Hell, I don't blame them. I'm not sure I'd be able to hold back myself." He took a drink as well then looked at Die, his eyes darkening as he mentioned rape. "....I see." He frowned, wanting to ask but didn't want to push Die or bring up those unwanted memories. 

Die looked to the side and pursed his lips a little. "If you want to know, you can ask. I'll tell you... though I've never told anyone else in my life." And that included the therapist he'd been required to go to because he'd been acting 'weird'.

Kyo reached out and ran his hand over Die's cheek. "I do want to know but only if you feel comfortable telling me."

Die leaned closer to the other, sighing softly. "You'd think I was going to come out with some huge rape story after all of that, wouldn't you?" He gave a rueful little look. "But... it's actually really not... that huge." He sighed. "You remember how I was 'sick' for like two weeks back in the end of 06?"

He blinked slightly then nodded, still frowning. "I remember and I remember your frequent visits to the 'doctor' as well." There hadn't been much information given to them at all, just that Die was "sick". 

Die made a face. "The label sent me to counseling because apparently they didn't quite understand what was going on with me, only that I wasn't acting 'right'." He shrugged a little. "Counselor said I was acting out in response to 'massive trauma'. But... the worst part is all that happened to me was that one of the bands on family values got me trashed one night... to the point that I had pretty much no filter left and started confessing some of my er... tendencies. The next night, the sort of blackmailed me with them, said they'd put the videos up if I didn't do what they told me to for each and every single video. That's... sort of how a few got put up on the internet. I decided there were some things I just wasn't going to do."

Kyo frowned and felt a sort of anger bubbling in him, suddenly wishing he could beat the shit out of each and every one of the people that blackmailed Die. "And what sort of things were they asking you to do exactly?" 

Die pursed his lips a little and then looked down, looking ashamed. "Mostly... drugs. Once they had me fucking high as hell, they asked for other things.... sexual favors. It wasn't like they held me down and made me... it wasn't rape in that sense, but it also wasn't like if I hadn't been high, I would have done it with those people." He frowned a little. "The funny part... it's not even the sex that bothers me to this day, it's the fact that they pretty much almost shoved a few of those pills down my throat at one point."

Kyo sighed and brushed Die's hair back. "That's... awful. No wonder you initially protested our return to the US... I'd wondered why you were so against it when you seemed to have had so much fun the first go round." 

Die frowned a little. "I was so scared we'd end up bumping into those fucking jackasses again." He shook his head. "But it turned out to be so good for us... and in the end, for me. So many good friends have come of it." He gave Kyo a little smile. "Please... don't tell anyone about the drugs. I told the counselor about the sex part, but not the drugs. It could have ended me... us... the whole fucking band."

Kyo nodded his head, still frowning. "I won't tell anyone... why would I?" He contemplated Die's story, the whole idea of it making him slightly ill. After a moment though, he shook his head and picked up another berry, offering it to Die. "You know what though...?" 

Die took it in his fingers and bit off half of it, then the other half, putting the stem aside. Once he'd swallowed, he murmured, "What?"

Kyo leaned forward and pressed his lips to Die's. "I love you." 

Die couldn't help but smile at that. It was a little answer to his huge confession. "I love you, too," he replied, happy to be able to reply rather than start the exchange. "And on a less horribly personal note... I don't like cock rings."

Kyo laughed. "I'm not fond of them either. At least, not when I'm the one wearing it." 

"What about you? Anything you're horribly against?" He tilted his head a little.

Kyo licked his lips and huffed out a breath. "I despise being called 'daddy'. It will wilt my erection in 2 seconds flat.”

Die let out a laugh. "Oh lord almighty, who tried to call you daddy?"

Kyo snorted. "A couple of exes tried it… and one tranny I picked up in a seedy bar in Hong Kong." 

"I'm afraid I'd just end up laughing if I tried." He smirked. "Cannot even remotely think of you as being a daddy during sex." He squinted a little. "Don't take this the wrong way, because I'm not even remotely into him... but Kaoru could be a daddy during sex."

Kyo just bust out laughing. "Oh..oh ho..I could imagine it. 'Oh daddy Kaoru! Spank me~!'" He laughed harder, reaching down to clutch his side. 

Die smirked and shook his head. "Dude... he's a daddy if I've ever seen one. I bet all the little girlies cry it to him when he fucks them hard." He finished off his glass of wine and poured another, offering to top off Kyo's.

Kyo snorted and nodded to the wine, taking a long drink when Die topped it off. "That and all the little twinks..." 

Die grinned, putting the bottle back and letting out a soft huff. "Now... back to the more interesting point... Kyo has fucked a tranny in Hong Kong. For the love of god... story."

Kyo winced slightly, having the decency to look a bit ashamed of himself. "Well, you know when we first went to Hong Kong and we partied for like three days straight? Well... I went off on my own after way too many glasses of whatever liquor was being pushed at me and ended up in this bar. It was a helluva place too. Covered in neon signs. I guess the lights attracted me or something but the next thing I knew, I was sitting at a table there and this 'woman' was pushing her rack in my face. Being drunk, I thought it'd be a great time for a fuck so we went back to her motel room nearby and well, I got quite a surprise when I took off her skirt to find a raging erection." He laughed and shook his head. 

Die arched an eyebrow at the other and then smirked. "Oh thank god. I'm not the only one with drunk dumbassery stories." He shook his head a little. "I have very few words. New York City. Two entire six packs and five shots of whiskey. And two women... right in front of the fans."

Kyo shook his head. "Ah yes, that little incident....I remember...you whore." He winked to let Die know he was teasing. 

Die snorted. "Best part... I didn't even get anything out of it except a bad rep. Went back to the hotel and I couldn't get hard and then I ended up puking." He snorted. "Go me!" He held up his glass in a mock toast. "Thank god I'm done with the days of pretending I like vagina."

Kyo snorted and leaned forward, nipping Die's bottom lip. "Agreed..." He'd always wondered if the other really and truly liked the fangirls hanging off him like that, finding it skeezy more than anything. Of course, it might also have been jealousy that made him want to pry the hussies off with a crowbar.

Die let out a half-hearted chuckle. "Mmm... I tended to be stupid with things I guess. Let's hope I'm over stupid." He glanced at Kyo and gave him a sheepish look.

Kyo chuckled softly. "I dunno, you may be committing your stupidest act yet." He gave Die a half serious look then smiled. "I think our strawberries are about gone and the water's gotten cold."

Die snorted. "If this is a mistake, then it'll surely be the greatest I've ever made." He reached to pull the plug on the tub, waiting until it was about 2/3 of the way down and then standing up, offering to help Kyo up as well. 

Kyo got on his knees and found that he was face-to-dick with Die and smirked, leaning forward and giving the other a little lick before grasping his hand and standing. "We'll see..." 

Die let out a gasp, his eyes wide as he stared down at the other. "Gah!" He pulled the other up when his hand was offered and then chuckled. "We'll shower off real fast." He reached to put the wine glasses and bottle out and then pulled the curtain, turning on the sprayer.

Kyo laughed and nodded, moving under the water for a moment, letting the bubble bath rinse off of him. "Ahh the bath was amazing, baby." 

"Good, that was the point." He leaned in to kiss him gently, reaching to get the shower gel and starting to rub Kyo down with it.

He chuckled softly and kissed Die back. "True..." He held out his arms for Die, letting him wash him. "You can do this anytime you want, by the way... after every show." He smirked a bit, knowing that if Die got within ten feet of him after a show now, he'd probably end up having his way with him right then and there. 

Die smirked a little at him, refraining from telling him that he'd once ended up having to bathe him when he'd had the flu and gone about beating himself anyway, thus ending up in him passing out and puking on himself. That... just wasn't romantic at all.

Kyo looked up when Die's hands paused, raising an eyebrow. "And what are you thinking about?" 

"Uh," he let out, pursing his lips a little and then flushing. "Nothing... nothing at all."

"Sure… I believe that... but whatever. I think it's your turn now." He grinned and pecked Die on the lips before rinsing off quickly and grabbing the shower gel, soaping Die up slowly, taking his time to feel the other's body. 

Die sort of lounged half against the wall while the other started to work on him. "Hey... a man's allowed to have his secrets. Just the small ones."

Kyo hummed softly, nodding. He had a few of his own that he had yet to divulge to anyone. "I agree, just promise me you'll tell me the important stuff?" He continued rubbing soap over Die's body, more or less just feeling him up at this point. 

Die nodded. "As long as you promise that as well." He didn't want to be stuck with something huge that wasn't told between them, for certain.

Kyo nodded as well then stepped back. "I think you're clean enough." He grinned and moved so Die could rinse. 

Die shifted to rinse off, doing so quickly and then smiling a little at the other as he shut off the water and pushed the curtain back, grabbing a towel and passing it to Kyo, getting one for himself as well.

Kyo took the towel and patted himself dry before stepping out of the tub and scrubbing it over his hair. "I'm fairly certain I've told you every big secret I have... and if I've forgotten one or two, forgive me. It's not because I want to keep it from you or anything. I just can't remember." He laughed slightly then turned to hang the towel up. 

Die gave him a small smile and nodded. "I... have a few, I always do. But it's sort of like... timing matters on them, you know?"

He gave Die a half smile and nodded. "I understand completely, baby." He moved over to Die to wrap his arms around his waist, nuzzling his still damp chest. 

He ran his hands over Kyo's hair and then huffed out a soft sound. "Did you want to go and er... do what I promised and then didn't?"

Kyo laughed softly and looked up at Die, reaching up to cup his cheek. "Actually... I was thinking.. .it'd be nice if you just..." He paused and looked away slightly, his cheeks flushing. "...made love to me." 

Die's eyes brightened at the prospect. That sounded much better to him, like something he could for sure do after all the confessing he'd just done. He brushed his knuckles over Kyo's cheek and smiled happily. "Of course, baby."

Kyo smiled softly and leaned into Die's touch, running his hand over the other's bare chest. "That smile, that one that you have now... I think it could pull me from the darkest depths." 

Die flushed a little and ducked his head slightly. "I'm glad it'd be such an easy task. This smile... has almost always had something to do with you." He led him toward the bedroom, ditching his towel on the washer along the way.

Kyo found himself blushing at the thought and just simply squeezed Die's hand as they walked into the bedroom, moving to sit on the edge of the bed. 

Die moved onto the bed and lay down on his side, gently nudging Kyo to follow him. "Come here... lay down with me."

Kyo did as he was asked, crawling up the bed and lying next to Die, reaching out to run a hand over the other's shoulder. 

The guitarist pulled him close, looping one leg over him and nuzzling into him gently, kissing at his neck and moving ever so sweetly against him, not pushing anything and certainly not going fast.

He sighed softly and closed his eyes, running his fingers through his lover's hair, shivering at the intimate contact. 

Things progressed ever so slowly forward, Die feeling like he was on top of the world as he pretty much coaxed Kyo into wanting him even more. He moaned quietly against his lover's lips, gently rolling him over to press between his legs, body rubbing against the other's.

Kyo let out his own soft moan as Die moved against him, his body responding as he rolled his hips upward, his hands moving to explore the other's spine. He turned his head to nuzzle and kiss along Die's neck, ever so slightly grazing his teeth over the skin.

Die moaned quietly, enjoying the way the other was arching toward him, obviously wanting him just as much he wanted him. He took his sweet time, continuing with what they were doing and then eventually going about finding the lube and moving to try to get down to start prepping the other.

The vocalist sighed with pleasure as they moved together, his arousal growing further as he felt Die responding to their actions. When the other moved between his legs, he parted them and gazed down at Die. 

Die slowly moved down his body, moving to tease the tiger on his hip while he went about prepping the vocalist. It just seemed the most operative thing to do that wasn't blatantly sucking Kyo's dick right then.

Kyo shivered and reached down, running his hand up Die's arm since it was the only part he could reach at the moment. He took a breath and relaxed when Die's fingers entered him, another moan escaping his lips. 

Die made sure to take it slow, kissing and mouthing over all of Kyo's tattoo before he pushed in another finger, his own dick hardening at the prospect of taking the other in such a way.

Another shiver went through him when Kyo felt Die's lips on his tattoo, his hand moving to trail through the other's hair. He groaned softly at the other finger, flexing his body some then relaxing again. 

Die made sure not to go too quickly, wanting Kyo wanting him but not scrape-at-him-desperate. He kissed his way down from his belly button, nuzzling his nose against the thatch of hair around the base of Kyo's cock, almost wanting to suck the other's dick. He groaned quietly.

Kyo's breath was coming out in soft pants now, his hips shifting and pushing down against Die's fingers, his cock flexing when the other's lips got so near. "Hnn..." 

Die's breath ghosted over Kyo's dick and he flicked out his tongue, tasting of the side of his dick only, not allowing himself much as he carefully moved his fingers around.

He sighed and let his hand slip from Die's hair to run over his shoulders, moaning lightly. He finally settled for resting his hands in the sheets, twisting them a bit as he whispered. "Die... I want to feel you."

The guitarist gave in for a moment and slid down over his dick, sucking him a few good times before he popped off his dick and slid up his body, lubing himself in a rather sly sort of manner. He moved to position himself and then slid all the way in with a soft groan.

Kyo let out a soft cry when he felt Die's mouth on, hips jerking upward automatically before he calmed down, shivering a bit. When Die moved up, he wrapped his arms around his shoulders, spread his legs more, moaning deeply as he felt Die move into him. 

Die stayed there, just over him, a soft sort of look on his face. After a few moments, he began to move, just a little tiny shift of his hips as he ran one hand through Kyo's hair, almost cradling the other's body beneath himself.

Kyo had never felt more cherished in his life and something about the moment put a lump in his throat and he had to swallow several times before just burying his face against Die's neck, bringing his legs up to wrap around the other's waist, drawing him closer. 

Die continued with the pace, soft huffing breaths coming out against the other's skin. He moved to kiss the side of his head, pleased little sounds making their way to the surface.

Kyo shifted and moved underneath Die, a soft moan of the other's name escaping his lips as his length brushed against his abdomen. 

He pulled back enough to ensure they were looking at one another, leaving as little barrier as possible between them as he slowly moved within the other.

Kyo turned his head and gazed up at Die, sliding his hand along the other's back up to brush through the hair at the nape of his neck as he moved with him. 

"God, I love you," he whispered, pushing in a bit more powerfully for one thrust and then going back to his old pace and power.

Kyo let out a half cry, half moan as Die pushed in harder, barely grazing his prostate. "Oh God... Die." He took a breath and murmured "I love you, too." 

Die noticed the reaction and just couldn't help but want to cause it again. He thrust in at the same angle again, doing it hard enough to get his dick to push against the right area, the look on his face making it clear he wanted to see that look once more.

Die got his wish as Kyo's face contorted into a look of pure pleasure, his body shuddering as he let out another strangled moan, his nails biting into Die's skin. "Oh! Die!" 

"That's right baby, just like that," he murmured softly, keeping himself very carefully on task to keep making the other create those sounds.

Kyo couldn't stop the moans as Die continually hit that spot, his hips straining upward. After a bit, he finally dropped his head back and reached out to fist his hands in the sheets, his breath coming in pants now. "Daisuke... hnng!"

Die got a little more vigorous with it, Kyo's reactions ramping up his own pleasure of the whole situation. He damn near curled himself around the other, making sure to keep the same angle. "Kyo," he hissed out.

Kyo arched into Die, clinging to the sheets like a lifeline as the pleasure got more and more intense. He knew he wouldn't last much longer and panted out, "T-touch me."

Die slid his hand down between them, grasping Kyo's cock and stroking it in an oddly different manner than how he was shoving into him.

The vocalist cried out as Die's hand wrapped around him, his hips bucking upward almost violently. "Oh God!" 

Die purred out softly, "Cum for me, Kyo... let me watch you in your most intimate moment."

Kyo moaned lowly and with another brush of Die against his sweet spot, he tumbled off the edge, crying out the other's name as his body practically convulsed with his orgasm. 

It only took Die a few thrusts before he was gone as well, letting out a good moan while he was at it. He bit the inside of his cheeks to refrain from screaming out the word fuck, which would surely ruin the intimate moment.

Kyo shuddered and felt another wave hit him as Die came inside him, his body clenching around the other's length before he relaxed and fell back against the bed, panting softly. "Die... love… you." 

Die remained curled around him, breathing hard from the exertion, smiling down at him. "I love you too, baby."

Kyo smiled softly and pulled down for a deeply passionate kiss, running his fingers through the other's hair then wrapped his arms around him. 

Die kissed him back, making little pleased sounds against his lips. When he pulled back, he gave him a little smile to the other.

Kyo lightly nipped Die's bottom lip and sighed with contentment and pleasure. "You are... absolutely gorgeous like this."

Die shifted a little, his cock slipping free of the other's body, making him gasp softly. "As are you."

Kyo shivered and let out a soft groan as Die slipped from his body. "Mmm..." 

Die moved to the side, laying down and wrapping his arms around the other, burrowing in close to him with a soft sigh of pleasure. 

Kyo nuzzled into Die's neck, closing his eyes and feeling his body relax into the other's embrace, slowly drifting off. 

Die wasn't far behind him, settling in for the night, a smile on his lips. This... this was bliss.

**To Be Continued…**


	5. Chapter 5

Die put his guitar aside, not really feeling the music right then. He frowned a little and closed his eyes, reaching to pinch the bridge of his nose. He was really tense today and the fact that he hadn't had a chance to see Kyo for a few days didn't help anything either.

Kyo was in a mood that day as he made his way to the studio. He'd been called in on his day off to redo a track that the techs had somehow managed to screw up. Huffing, he plodded into the main room and dropped his bag down with a thud, not really paying attention to who was around. 

Die looked up when he saw the door open, watching Kyo walk past, looking pissed off. He didn't stop him just then, knowing Kaoru needed him and he just sighed, putting his headphones on and listening to what he'd been doing.

Kyo pulled out his notebooks and plunked them down on the table before standing to go get some hot tea. When he turned around, he spotted Die and his face softened somewhat. Glancing around, he walked toward Die, very casually running his finger over the other's shoulder on his way out to where the coffee and tea were. 

Die looked up and smiled at him, reaching to catch Kyo's fingertips for a moment as the other passed him by. It made him feel a little bit better about the day. He huffed out a soft sound and went back to his work for the time being.

After getting tea and taking his sweet ass time drinking it, Kyo made his way to the recording booth and started warming up, stealing glances at Die as he did. He smiled to himself and got down to business. 

The minutes slipped past, fading into hours and eventually Die got to the point where he was pissed off with his own work. He tossed his headphones down and moved over to settle down next to the tech helping adjust Kyo's settings. He crossed one leg over the other and leaned back, crossing his arms and just watching for the sake of watching, not saying a word.

Kyo got into his usual recording mode, shutting everything out as he focused on pulling the passion from within himself to convey it into the song. Unfortunately, it wasn't going his way today and he eventually let out a curse and yanked his headphones off, stomping out of the booth and past the tech and Die. On his way by, he gave Die's shoulder a barely imperceptible tap as he muttered something about getting lunch. 

Die glanced at the tech and then after Kyo. He made a face and murmured, "Better go after him... he's being... well... him, again." He patted the guy on the shoulder and gave him a friendly little smile as he headed past. "It's okay. Don't take it personally; he's just mad at himself." He headed out after Kyo, catching up with him in the hallway and gently touching his shoulder. "Hey... long time no see."

Kyo didn't respond until they were well out of earshot and the view of others. He turned then and shoved Die against the wall, kissing him harshly but cutting it short for fear of someone walking up on them. "Yeah...too fucking long." 

Die let out a little groan as Kyo shoved him against the wall, kissing him like he was ravenous for it. When the other pulled back, he let out a little breathless chuckle. "Too long, indeed."

Kyo laughed softly then looked around again. "So... how's your day going?" 

Die shrugged a little. "Not well," he murmured softly. "And I see yours is doing equally as shit-tastic." He gestured him with him. "So... actually lunch or... 'lunch’?”

Kyo started following Die. "Yeah...I can't get it right or something. And...'lunch'." He smirked a little. Maybe a good hard fucking would bring out the passion in him. 

Die smirked and debated for a moment and then gestured the other out after him, heading down the hall toward where he used to take smoke breaks. There was only one person left to accidentally walk out on them and he was busy as shit right then.

Kyo followed Die, stuffing his hands in his pockets to stop himself from groping the other's ass as it swayed a bit in front of him. 

He pushed out the back doors into the area where they usually smoked, the whole area fenced in with a little tin roof over it, so as to keep the elements mostly off them when they went out. He closed the door behind them and immediately reached for Kyo, grabbing him and pressing him against the wall.

Kyo glanced around briefly before Die grabbed him, a quiet groan sliding from his lips before he pressed them against Die's, his hands immediately going to grab his ass. 

"God you make me so horny," he murmured softly just before kissing the other rather passionately, grinding against him a little bit harshly.

Kyo growled slightly, kissing Die back, nipping his bottom lip. "Good... because I fucking need you." He squeezed the other's ass roughly, pushing their hips together. 

Die groaned a little and then returned the favor, taking two handfuls of Kyo's ass and smirking. "You want to fuck me... or am I fucking you?"

Kyo smirked a bit, leaning in to nibble at Die's neck. "I want your ass, baby..." 

Die pulled out a small tube from his pocket and placed it in Kyo's hand. It was actually Vaseline lip therapy, but it doubled well for lube when he had the urge to not just use his dry hand, so he figured it'd work for this, too. He pushed away from the wall and started to unbuckle his own belt and then unzip and unbutton his pants, just going for gold since it'd be a fast fuck.

Kyo looked down at the lip stuff and chuckled. "I'm going to assume you've used it this way before. I was just wondering how well you could take it with just spit." He watched Die reveal himself as he got a good bit of the lip therapy on his fingers, snaking his arm around the other while dipping his hand between his ass cheeks, gently pushing a finger in. "Hng... how do you manage to be so damn tight every time?" 

Die let out a chuckle. "Jerked off with it before, it works well enough. Figure it'll work for this." He pushed his pants down and groaned softly when Kyo reached around and started to push his finger into him. "I manage... quite well... obviously." He chuckled a bit breathlessly.

Kyo snorted and moved his hand down to wrap around Die's dick, stroking him a bit as he added a second finger, thrusting them in a bit and scissoring them, trying to prep Die enough but also rushing it. 

The guitarist was still mostly soft, concentrating for now on the fuck that was to come and wanting to enjoy that when it arrived. But the touch from the other started to bring him to hardness fairly fast and he just rode out the feeling of it.

Kyo finally felt that Die was stretched enough and pulled his fingers out, unzipping his pants and pulling himself free before adding more of the lip stuff to his hand and stroking it over his cock, groaning softly as he just enjoyed his own touch for a moment. "Ready baby?" He grabbed Die's hips and lined himself up, pushing in slowly to make sure Die was good.

Die made sure he turned himself around as much as he wanted to watch Kyo jerk himself off. He pressed his hands against the wall and presented his ass to the other, pushing back toward him and waiting rather happily while the other took his hips and lined himself up, pushing in. "Fuck." This whole things was turning him on so much.

Kyo took that as Die being okay and pushed in fully, waiting half a second before starting to thrust against the other a bit harshly, groaning as his nails bit into Die's skin. "Fuck... baby... so good" 

Die let out a moan and pushed backwards toward him, just repeating himself. "Fuck," he murmured again, seeming to be stuck on the word, his dick hardening the rest of the way just to be being fucked. It was something Die just liked to have done to him.

Kyo grunted and leaned up, clamping his mouth on Die's shoulder to keep from being too noisy as he thrust into his lover's ass, his pace becoming frantic as the whole situation only spurred him on. "Hnng..." 

Die had just reached down to start stroking himself with one hand, his face a mask of pure bliss when the metal door swung open and Kaoru stumbled out, cigarette already in his mouth and lighter already flicked. He just paused for a moment, staring at them, and then continued out the door, shuffling to the corner and lighting his cigarette, leaning on the fence and staring at the ground, trying to ignore them.

Kyo glanced up as the doors opened, but couldn't make himself stop as he pounded into Die's ass, letting out a growl into Die's ear. "Gonna cum." 

Die almost felt more aroused by the other's presence, amused that he wanted his cig so bad he wouldn't go away until they were done fucking. Almost intentionally, he ramped up his noises, making himself lewd for the other to hear.

Kyo caught what Die was a doing and smirked, glancing over at Kaoru before all out biting into Die's neck to draw more sounds from him, his hand slipping down to wrap around the other's dick as his hips slapped against his ass. "Fuck... yes!" 

Die strained between what Kyo was doing and his hand, crying out at the bite and making all kinds of other nice noises. Kaoru finally looked up at them, watching with a look that clearly reflected morbid fascination rather than anything else, puffing away at his cigarette.

Finally Kyo couldn't take in anymore and slammed hard into Die a few times before smirking and pulling out, cumming all over Die's ass with a lewd moan. 

Die let out a groan and then a whimper as Kyo pulled out, jerking himself off harshly while he felt Kyo's cum splatter his ass. "Baby, suck me… please."

Kyo smirked and grabbed Die's hips, twisting him around before kneeling in front him, wrapping his lips around his dick with a groan. 

Die leaned against the wall and let the other start sucking him, alternating between watching Kyo and seeing Kaoru’s reaction to this. The other guitarist was watching this part with something of an eager look on his face, cigarette just burning by his side.

Kyo shot a sidelong glance at Kaoru, smirking around Die's dick before pulling his head back and making a show of running his tongue around the head, dipping it into the slit then sliding all the way down, swallowing around him. 

Die groaned at the treatment from Kyo, enjoying it very, very much. He shivered slightly and then licked his lips, reaching to put his hand in Kyo's hair, gently pushing him down as he went, knowing Kyo could take it without issue. Kaoru, for his part, shifted uncomfortably on the spot, his dick slowly starting to tent his pants, something he was obviously not proud of.

Kyo glanced up at Die then over to Kaoru again before closing his eyes and bobbing his head, taking all of Die's dick, moaning lowly. He was rather amused to see Kaoru getting hard off watching them. 

Die held him there for a moment, slowly fucking himself in and out, a look of utter bliss painted on his face as he did it. After a moment, he hissed out, "Suck it hard."

Kyo groaned and pulled back with a lewd slurping sound sucking just the tip before bobbing his head faster, hollowing out his cheeks as he sucked him.

Die quickly ramped up toward his own orgasm, finally grabbing Kyo's hair and holding him still, hissing out, "I said suck, not move." He thrust in only about half his dick each time, but definitely went about fucking the hell out of Kyo's mouth before he pulled out, grabbing his dick with his free hand and just aiming it at the other's face as he started to cum, stroking a little to get it to spurt out a little further.

Kyo's eyes flashed with pure lust at Die's treatment of him, his own dick throbbing slightly when the other came on his face. He opened his mouth to catch some of it then licked his lips, moaning softly. "Damn baby..." 

Die let out a little groan and then a breathless laugh, collapsing back against the wall, sliding his hand over his dick to get the last drop out and suck it off his finger. He watched Kaoru as he did it and then offhandedly commented, "You know, you're about to burn your fingers, Kaoru." The guitarist jerked and dropped his cigarette, squishing it out with his boot and then jamming his hands into his pockets and just standing there awkwardly for a moment.

Kyo glanced up at Die then over to Kaoru again, smirking as he stood up, wiping his face off. "Looks like you're having a few issues there Kao..." 

Kaoru cleared his throat and shrugged his shoulders. "Not every day you walk out on your bandmates… well... fucking, to be blunt." He started an awkward sort of shuffle for the door. Die moved into his way, cock still out, not bothering to put it away, and smirked at him. "You liked the blowjob part... your dick is hard." There, he'd be even more blunt then.

Kyo licked his lips and stepped over to them, blatantly ogling the tent in Kaoru's pants. "Obviously..." 

Kaoru looked a little horrified for a moment and then reached to push his glasses back up his nose. "I was imagining you were a girl, so don't be too happy about that, Kyo." 

Die choked on a laugh. "Oh, hunny, he's so not a girl. That dick is amazing."

Kyo raised an eyebrow, reaching down to pull his half-hard dick back out with a snort. "Oh please, Kaoru... maybe if it'd been Die on his knees instead... but I'm a bit hard to make a girl." 

Kaoru glanced down despite himself and then looked away, looking shocked like it was a novel concept the other had a cock. "Ha..." he didn't know what else to say. 

Die smirked slightly and then shifted, putting his dick back away and smirking. "Cat got your tongue, leader boy?"

Kyo just smirked, tucking himself away as well. "C'mon Kaoru... we're all grown-ass men here." 

Kaoru huffed. "Yes, my dick is hard, okay? I admit it. I like watching blowjobs, no matter the genders involved. But what I walked out on weirded me out, so forgive me if I'm not real keen on standing around talking right now." Die snorted a little and glanced at Kyo.

Kyo looked back at Die and slipped his arm around his waist, shrugging slightly. "Must not have weirded you out too much if you can still get hard." 

Kaoru looked almost seething by then. "It's been four months, okay?!" he spat out at him and then cursed in a language even Die didn't know. Sourly, he glowered at them. "What does it take for you idiots to move so I can use the bathroom?!"

Die stared at him in utter surprise, glancing at Kyo, but still not moving, waiting on the vocalist to answer.

Kyo snorted and looked at Die with an almost questioning look. He was definitely curious and their leader's irritation only pushed that curiosity. "Four months since what exactly?" 

Kaoru looked about ready to strangle someone, gritting his teeth and hissing out, "Since I got fucking laid. Now get. out. of. my. way."

Die arched one slim eyebrow. "Damn... leader needs to let off some steam. I think... it could be arranged to you know… help. It's for a good cause."

Kyo licked his lips and nodded, moving a bit closer to Kaoru. "I think so... we have to do our part to keep 'Leader-sama' happy." 

Kaoru glowered at them and then reached right behind Die to slam his hand into the metal door. He got right in Die's face and hissed out. "I'm not into men. But if you don't get out of my way, I might very well punch one in the fucking face."

Die pursed his lips into a thin line, a fire igniting in them that didn't get there very often. He reached out and grabbed Kaoru's shirt, hand fisting in it. "Go ahead and try, fucker."

Kyo looked from Kaoru to Die then got between them, firmly pushed Kaoru back. "Oi... what's your problem Kao? Don't be so fucking uptight." He took a chance and reached down, groping Kaoru's dick through his pants. He knew he might get punched, but he had to know what the other's reaction would be. 

Kaoru looked damn close to taking a swipe when Kyo shoved between them and shoved him back. "My problem is that I have two men that are supposed to be my friends and co-workers propositioning me when all I was trying to do was go and fucking jerk off, that's what!"

Die huffed a little and stayed out of it, pursing his lips a little and just staying quiet.

Kyo stared at Kaoru for a while then moved back, raising his hands and shrugging. "Whatever. We were just trying to help... and you're not fooling anyone but yourself, Kao." He shifted and crossed his arms over his chest. 

Die stepped aside, leaving the door open for the other to exit out of if he so desired. He sighed and shook his head a little.

Kaoru pushed past and went stomping off down the hallway, muttering under his breath.

Kyo just glared after him, snorting once he was gone. "I've never seen someone so hard up and so in fucking denial of what he wants." 

Die pursed his lips a little. "Get used to it. The one time he caught me with a gay porno mag in my bag, he flipped out. But that was years ago... I'd have thought things might have changed given he stuck around to watch and all."

Kyo huffed slightly and shook his head. "Yeah, if he was so freaked out by it... why didn't he leave?" 

Die shook his head a little, finally doing up his pants. "Fuck if I know. I can't believe he just watched."

Kyo shrugged and readjusted himself. "Fucking weird. So what now, baby?" 

Die shrugged a little. "Well... did the fuck help at least, Mr. Creative?"

Kyo chuckled softly and turned to kiss Die deeply. "Mm... maybe. Although Kaoru's bitchy attitude damn near killed it." 

Die frowned a little. "I should punch him for that. I wanted to be the inspiration for you."

Kyo looked up at Die and smiled slightly. "Baby, you may not realize this but you've been my inspiration more times than I can count." 

Die turned hopeful eyes up at the other and smiled softly. "Have I really?"

Kyo nodded, reaching out to run his hand over Die's chest. "You and your guitar... why do you think I almost always insist on the music first?" 

Die stepped close to him, almost seeming to forget the Kaoru incident, moving to frame his face with his hands and leaning down to kiss him ever so gently. When he pulled back, he had the brightest look on his face.

Kyo sighed softly into the kiss, a soft smile on his face when Die pulled back. "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby. With all my heart." He smiled softly and pushed Kyo's slightly sweaty hair back. "Let's get cleaned up... in the break room, not the bathroom."

Kyo nuzzled into Die's hand, feeling as if his chest might burst for a moment then nodded. "I agree, I don't really want to get punched." He turned and opened the door, stepping inside and waiting for Die to join him before moving down the hall to their break room. 

Die went after him, hands in his pockets, feeling like he was still on cloud nine from their little exchange. It made him so happy to know he'd been Kyo's inspiration. Once they got to the break room, he moved a coffee pot and then got to the sink, turning on the faucet and starting to wash up his hands, arms, and face.

Kyo moved over to the sink as well, wetting a couple of paper towels and wiping off his face then washing his hands and such. He kept stealing glances at Die, smiling and starting to hum softly. 

Once Die was done, he moved to put an arm around Kyo's waist, leaning on Kyo a little and looking damn pleased with himself.

Kyo looked up at Die then leaned his head against his chest, opening his mouth and quietly singing out the part of the song he'd been having so much trouble with. 

Die gently pushed his hands into the other's hair, holding him while he sang to himself, looking close to tears at how happy he was and how much this moment meant to him. He wanted to ask if Kyo would record it like this, but he also wasn't going to interrupt him, not a chance in hell. _His_ Kyo was singing to him... because of him, and that meant the fucking world.

As if he could read Die’s mind, Kyo stopped briefly to reach into his pocket, pulling out his phone and opening up a recording app, hitting record then continuing on with the song, something he'd done countless times before to capture the sound at his moment of inspiration. When he was finally done, he looked up at Die and was almost shocked to see that his eyes were wet. "Baby... what is it?"

Once Kyo was done and noticed his little tears issue, Die just shook his head and moved to kiss him gently again. "God I love you... and I love even partially being the cause of your inspiration... it just means everything to me."

Kyo somehow found himself choking up a bit and just kissed Die back, clinging to him for a moment before answering. "I love you, too. More and more each day." He swallowed and licked his lips, chuckling softly. "Back to work or do you wanna bail for the day?" 

Die shook his head. "I want to watch you record that, that's what I want to do." 

Kyo smiled and nodded, leaning for another kiss before pulling back and moving towards the door. "I think I can do that..." 

Die gave him the kiss and then smiled happily, following after him, not caring right then about his own work, just wanting to watch Kyo work.

Kyo made his way back to the recording booth and set up again, putting his headphones on and nodding to the tech. He looked out and at Die then started belting out the song with the passion he'd been seeking before, his eyes sliding closed as he fully immersed himself in it. 

Die settled down with the tech, watching with a smile on his face and a certain amount of awe in his eyes.

Kyo pulled from his feelings for Die, his face contorting with emotion as he sang, throwing his all into it, almost bending over double with the effort. 

The more Die watched, the closer to the glass he got, leaning forward and looking amazed. He never heard the door click shut behind him or Kaoru coming up. When Kaoru spoke up, no matter how softly, Die actually jumped. "I guess what happened was good for something."

Kyo was letting the final notes of the song trail off when he opened his eyes to look out at Die, frowning when he saw Kaoru there. He slipped his headphones off and stepped out of the booth, moving over to them and giving Kaoru a questioning look. 

Kaoru repeated himself when Kyo came out of the booth, Die not having responded to him at all. "I guess what happened was good for something." Die just pursed his lips a little and continued trying to ignore Kaoru, reaching to brush his hand over Kyo's gently.

Kyo cocked his head slightly, clearing his throat a bit. "And what was that...?" He reached down and caught a couple of Die's fingers, squeezing them. 

"That was a very lovely job you just did on that part," Kaoru responded.

Die squeezed Kyo's fingers back, a certain tension in them, his head bowed slightly so as to avoid talking to or looking at Kaoru right then.

Kyo nodded and murmured out a, "Thank you" before glancing to Die. "Well uhm... I really need some hot tea now." 

Kaoru nodded and went around and started talking to the tech, saying some things about adjusting stuff. Die simply took the opportunity to move, getting up and leaving the room with Kyo.

Kyo studied Kaoru for a moment then moved to follow Die to their break room again, feeling somehow unsettled now despite the fact that he’d been so well into the zone just moments ago.

Die went past the area they'd been in before to what they'd dubbed the 'quiet' room. He slipped inside and settled on the couch, folding his arms over his chest.

Kyo went and got his tea, adding a good amount of honey to it then went to Die, sitting next to him and sipping his tea for a bit, brows furrowed. 

Eventually Die unfolded himself and reached for Kyo's hand, holding it in his own. "I just want to beat the fuck out of him when I see him now. I don't even know."

Kyo laced his fingers with Die's and squeezed softly. "It's weird... there's this weird tension to him." He looked up at Die. "At least he made an effort to be civil?" 

Die sighed and rubbed his eyes a little. "I just... right now I can't even look at him without wanting to make that face ugly as sin with my fist."

Kyo nodded, leaning his head against Die's shoulder. "It was uncalled for. Maybe we should just get out of here. I'm done with my part and I know you won't be able to focus now."

"I'll just pack up my computer and I'll bring a guitar home." He sighed softly. "You don't mind if I try there if it strikes?" He paused halfway through getting up, realizing he had just referred to Kyo's house as home.

Kyo noticed right away and smiled softly, shaking his head. "I'd actually love to watch you play." 

Die huffed out a little sound and then stood completely. "Stick around while I pack up and then we'll go."

Kyo nodded. "I need to get my bag anyway. Let's go." He went out first, leading Die back to where their stuff was, simply giving Kaoru a nod as he picked up his bag, his face emotionless. 

Die went to the other room and then started packing up his stuff, getting his guitar in its case as well and then cords since he didn't have it at home. He staunchly ignored Kaoru the entire time, not wanting to punch the other and risk an all-out brawl before they went on tour.

Kaoru nodded back, watching them pack up and leaving the room before they were done.

Kyo watched Kaoru leave, huffing slightly as he helped Die gather up his belongings. When they were finally done, he nodded to the tech, hoping the dude didn't read too much into their attitudes or anything then turned and casually walked out into the hall to wait for Die. 

Die walked past the tech. "Night," he offered in English, knowing that Japanese was the guy's first language. The tech waved at him and smiled a little. Die tried to offer one in return as he headed out with Kyo.

When Die came out, he reached out and took the other's hand, knowing that aside from Kaoru and the tech, no one else was there. "What do you want for dinner tonight? Take out? We could always go by the market..." He smiled a little to himself, finding that he liked making dinner plans with Die. It was so... domestic. 

Die smiled a little at him. "I think take out tonight. Not in the mood to have to cook tonight, you know?" He made a tiny face.

Kyo nodded. "We'll get pizza then... haven't had it in a while." He walked with Die out to his car, putting his bag in the trunk and leaving it open for Die to put his stuff in. "Think I'll stop at the convenience store and get some beer..." He slid into the car and waited for Die. 

Die followed him and put his stuff away as well, closing the trunk and then getting into the car, buckling up and pulling out his phone, flipping through it a bit and making a little face. "Brother's bugging me about coming in for a haircut again."

Kyo glanced over at Die. "Hmm... just don't do anything drastic, yeah?" He started off towards home, settling his hand on Die's leg as he drove. 

Die chuckled. "Yeah... I'll try not to." He sighed softly and tilted his head back. "He doesn't know." he closed his eyes.

Kyo looked over at Die as they pulled to a stop. "Doesn't know what?" 

"That I'm gay," he offered quietly.

Kyo blinked slightly then squeezed Die's leg, continuing on down the road. "Oh..." He bit his lip, frowning slightly, not sure what to say exactly. He didn't want to push Die the wrong way. "Will you... tell him?" 

Die kept his eyes closed. "This is the first time in my life that I've actually wanted to." That was saying something for sure.

Kyo glanced over at Die before pulling into the parking lot of the convenience store. He then leaned over and kissed Die's cheek, nuzzling him a bit. "It's your decision. Whenever you're comfortable."

Die looked over at him. "Mmm... if you were to find out about your sibling, would you rather want to know through a phone call, text, or in person?"

Kyo thought about it for a moment then sighed softly. "In person or at the very least... over the phone. Text is a horrible way." 

Die nodded a little. "Will... will you grab the beer?" he asked softly. 

Kyo nodded and pecked Die on the cheek again before slipping out of the car and putting his sunglasses on, not feeling like being recognized at the moment. He walked into the store and got beer and also picked up a few other things to snack on. 

Die texted his brother a few times, asking what he was doing and then telling him he was going to stop by for a few minutes if that was okay. His brother seemed enthused at the idea and said he had something from his mother for him to pick up anyway.

Kyo finally walked back out with a few bags and set them in the backseat, climbing back in the car and looking at Die knowingly. "So... to your brother's then?" 

Die peered up at him and blushed a little. "You know me too well." He sighed and then nodded. "I... I don't want to keep it from him when I'm finally serious about someone. It'd be unfair to you... to us."

Kyo felt a little thrill go through him, his heart flip-flopping some. It'd been a very long time since anyone wanted to tell their family about him. "I hope that he's understanding then." He realized he was a bit nervous at the prospect but pulled back onto the road and headed in the direction of Die's brother's place, knowing the general area.

"You don't have to come in with me if you don't want to. I mean... it's sort of my issue for not telling him." He pushed a hand through his hair. "My parents don't know either, but... that's a whole other ballgame."

Kyo looked over at Die. "It's up to you sweetheart... I'd be happy to come with you but I understand if it's something you want to do on your own." 

Die shrugged a little. "Honestly, it'll be easier if you go. But I can't know how he'll react, so…."

Kyo shook his head. "I'll go. Now, which street is it?" 

Die gave him instructions really quickly from where they currently were, impressed Kyo remembered at least this far from the whole one time he'd been dropped off here after a live. It showed how much Kyo had been paying attention all these years.

Kyo turned where Die told him and parked, reaching over to squeeze the other's hand tightly. 

Die squeezed his hand back and leaned over, stealing a quick kiss, thinking it for luck. He let go and slid out of the car, trying to tug his clothing into the right places and whatnot. "Here goes nothing... or everything."

Kyo smiled softly and slipped out with Die, brushing his hair back and taking a breath. "It'll be fine... I hope." 

Die loved his brother with an intensity that he couldn't manage to ever meet with another family member and it was going to crush him if the other didn't see the light in all of this. But he supposed it was a chance he had to take, because Kyo was his light, his heart and soul... and honestly worth even the closeness of his sibling. He headed to the door and pushed the doorbell, waiting, as always amused that his brother had spent all of his money Die had given him on a home that wasn't an apartment rather than other items.

A few moments passed and the door was opened by the other, fairer-haired brother, a smile on his face that rivaled Die's bright smiles. "Ah! You were mostly here already, I see. Come in, come in!" He stepped back and smiled at Kyo. "A pleasant surprise, Kyo. How are you?"

Kyo waited on the door to be answered, suddenly feeling quite nervous and rubbing his palms together. When Die's younger brother answered the door, he bowed and offered him a small smile. "Fine, how are you?" 

"I'm doing good. Finally got a chance to listen to the little demo Die slipped me. Really liking how things are progressing." 

Die huffed a little. "Hey, how many times do I have to tell you that no one is supposed to know I slip you shit?" He shook his head, just standing in the entryway, causing his brother to give him an odd look.

Kyo chuckled softly. "Thank you and don't worry, I won't tattle to the boss." He went to step in, but noticed Die wasn't moving and frowned a little but didn't say anything, simply cleared his throat a bit. 

Die shifted over enough for Kyo to get inside the door, not wanting to be a pain about it. His brother eyed him oddly and then sighed. "Okay, what's got your panties in a twist? You never just hang in my foyer unless you've got some bomb to drop on me."

Die swallowed thickly and ducked his head, wishing like hell he'd pre-gamed this shit. He didn't want to leave the area because he'd have to take his shoes off and he feared his brother exploding at him over it. That was always the problem with huge info, he supposed.

Kyo licked his lips and moved into the foyer a bit more, sticking close to Die but glanced over at his brother, unable to help clenching his hands together. 

Die's brother slowly shut the door and just looked between them, looking concerned. "Is it dad? What's going on?"

Instantly Die's face went from nervous to panic. "God no. I'm sorry, it's nothing like that!" He frowned then and ducked his head a little. "I..."

Kyo coughed a little and just barely shifted to the side so that his hip brushed against Die's. He wanted to take and hold his hand but that would sort of jump the gun. 

His brother relaxed a little, but still looked concerned. "You...?"

Die reached one shaking hand up to cover his face for a moment and then rather abruptly moved to hug his brother, leaving the other looking baffled, but hugging him back anyway. When Die stepped back, he looked a little more composed. He'd just had to do that before he might be kicked out of his brother's life forever. One last good memory for the road, so to speak. He swallowed against the lump in his throat and then straightened his shoulders and looked the other in the eye. If he was going to do this, he'd do it like a fucking man. "I thought you should know something... fairly important about me. I'm gay."

Kyo bit his lip, nervously watching Die's brother's face for his reaction, ready to defend his lover if need be. 

He stared at his older brother for all of a few seconds after the admission and then cracked a smile and shook his head, laughing softly. He reached to pat him on the shoulder. "Take off your shoes and get your ass in here. Jesus fuck. You act like the whole world doesn't already know that." He headed off toward the living room, chuckling to himself.

Die looked a little deflated and slightly bewildered, crouching to unlace his shoes and push them off. They'd stay for a few minutes at least, he supposed. Standing back up, he glanced at Kyo and murmured, "Guess I drop the other bomb now then."

Kyo blinked slightly, laughing a little behind his hand at Die's brother's reaction, relief going through him. "I guess so..." He toed off his shoes and stepped into the other man's living room, waiting for Die before deciding whether to sit or stand. 

Die followed his brother in, being handed a tumbler with about a shot of whiskey in the bottom. He took it and knocked it back, handing the tumbler back. Kyo, on the other hand was handed a small teacup. "It's a new green tea I got at this fancy new place. See what you think."

Die settled down on the couch when his brother sat, crossing one leg over the other in an elegant sort of manner.

Kyo smiled and took the tea with an appreciative nod, settling beside Die on the couch and sipping the tea, mming softly. "Ah, it's very good. I love the hint of lavender in it." 

Die reached for Kyo's free hand, luckily the one next to him, and laced his fingers with his own. He waited on his brother not to have anything in his hands before he offered. "I'd like to let you be one of the first to know... Kyo and I are dating... and it's pretty serious."

His brother looked over at him and then at Kyo and smiled softly. "So... will you be bringing him to Christmas dinner then? With Mom and Dad?"

Kyo swallowed and squeezed Die's hand, looking up at his brother. "...Christmas dinner?" Frankly, the prospect of being surrounded by Die's family scared the shit out of him but if the other wanted him to, he supposed he'd find some way to deal. 

Die's eyes widened and he stuttered a little before bursting out with, "Mom and Dad don't know I'm gay!"

His brother scoffed slightly and shook his head. "Watch this shit." He opened his phone and dialed their parent's phone number. They answered on the first ring. "Hey, it's me. Big news. Die finally came out. Just now."

Kyo gaped a bit at Die's brother then started laughing softly. The whole situation was starting to become hilarious to him despite his residual nervousness over it all. He hadn’t told his parents about moving to a new place, much less anything about his sexuality or who he was dating. 

Die gaped at the other like he'd lost his fucking mind. He growled out, "I'm gonna fucking kill you, you idiot!" when he told his parents.

Die's mother snorted in a very unladylike manner over the phone. "Oh, he _finally_ admits it? Just now?" She just turned and rolled her eyes at her husband. "Took him long enough..." 

The response from his mother from the phone’s speaker shut Die up immediately and he just blushed and pushed his hand over his face. "Fuck meeee," he intoned under his breath.

Die's brother laughed. "I don't think he knew that we knew before he did. This is pretty amusing to watch."

Kyo just sort of snickered into his teacup, trying so hard not to laugh at his lover's discomfort. 

Die's mother sighed. "Language, Daisuke... Anyway, calm down dear. We know and we're perfectly fine with it!" She laughed into the phone. "Oh stop torturing your brother." 

Die looked up at the other and huffed out a sigh. "It'd have been nice if he'd at least let me tell you guys myself. I mean... it's sort of big... to me."

His brother grinned. "Hey, I left the real news to you."

Kyo instantly stopped laughing and looked uncomfortable again. What would Die's parents think? He wasn't the greatest at socializing and he’d been rather aloof the last time he’d been in their presence. He also had a horrible track record for relationships that made him “not boyfriend material.” 

Die's mother just chuckled. "I know it's big to you but it's out there now, like a Band-Aid. Now what's this about real news?" 

Die squeezed Kyo's hand and then did his best to be loud enough for his parents to hear him. "I'm in a serious relationship... it's why I decided to come out with this finally." He peered over at Kyo, trying to find the right way to do this.

Die's brother just patiently held the phone, waiting on the whole thing to be said.

Die's mother and father listened intently, smiling at one another as they waited to hear who Die was with. 

Kyo just squirmed a bit, holding Die's hand tightly.

Die realized he wasn't getting any help on this one and just spit it out, elegant or not. "I'm with Kyo and I love him with everything I have."

Die's brother just smiled cheekily.

Die's mother looked at the phone then smiled, even though Die couldn't see it. "That's wonderful sweetheart! You two deserve to be happy!" She paused for a minute then asked. "Does he love you back yet?" Die opened his mouth to reply, but Kyo beat him to it and he found himself relieved he didn't have to try to field the question. 

Kyo cleared his throat. "Yes, I do...with all of my heart." He found his cheeks were rather red at this point, thankful that Die's parents weren't really there to see him fidgeting or blushing like a schoolgirl. 

Die's mother laughed softly. "Glad to hear it. You better be good to each other. And Daisuke! I want you both at Christmas dinner this year! No excuses!" 

Die lifted Kyo's hand and placed a chaste little kiss on it. "I promise I'll be there, but I can only speak for myself. I'm not keeping him from his own family if he wants to see them, Ma."

Die's brother spoke up again. "Die has to go. We're going now. Bye!" He clicked the phone shut and chuckled a little. "They'd never shut up, so... yeah."

Kyo let out a soft sigh and looked over at Die. "I'll be there... my family doesn't... really do that." He cleared his throat and then reached for his tea, finishing it off. 

Die rubbed his thumb over Kyo's hand, giving him loving warmth through the action itself. "I'm surprised everyone was so okay with it all," he murmured softly.

Die's brother shook his head. "Die, we've all known you were gay since you were in high school. You just kept lying to yourself and fucking all those slutty girls to lie to yourself." He glanced at Kyo. "Er... you didn’t hear that."

Kyo lifted Die's hand and repeated the same little kiss Die had given his moments before then chuckled softly. "Don't worry, I've seen him in action on tours."

Die rolled his eyes. "I just..." he sighed. "Yes, I was lying to myself, but I didn't even know it, honestly until a few years ago. And by then it was awkward to try telling anyone, so... I just kept doing it." He made a face.

His brother shook his head. "You're an idiot Die. But... you've stopped being so much of an idiot now, which is good."

Kyo just shook his head and squeezed Die's hand, smiling up at his brother thankfully. "I really appreciate that..." 

He chuckled. "So... I assume this was probably a pit stop... I don't want to hold you guys up."

Die shrugged a little. "After today... I need to regain some composure... trust me. I care about you and all, but it's like... dude... too much."

Kyo nodded a bit. "We were just on our way home, actually..." 

"Well, I wish you guys well and don't think you have to hide anything from me." He smiled softly. "You guys just... fit together. From what all I actually know, you guys need one another."

Die offered a little smile as well, getting up and going to hug his brother, getting a hard hug in return. Once he pulled away, his brother moved to hug Kyo as well.

Kyo had stood up and was slightly surprised by the hug, hesitating before smiling and hugging the other back. "Thank you."

Die smiled a little and then headed for the front door. He went and started to put his shoes on, looking more relieved than he had all day.

Kyo followed and slipped on his own shoes before turning and giving Die's brother a slight bow then a smile. 

Die's brother padded after them, looking pleased. "For your sake, I hope things go smoothly for the both of you."

Die glanced up and smiled. "We'll be fine... K... I've been in love with Kyo since... well... before I even admitted to myself I was gay."

Kyo blushed slightly. "And I've been at least attracted to your brother for just as long... though of course it's grown to be much, much more than that." 

Die got up, looping his arm around Kyo's waist. "Now if you'll excuse us, we have beer and pizza to enjoy." 

His brother grinned, a smile almost as epic as the other. "You two are adorable together." He held up his phone. "Just a picture to send to our parents?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose a little then looked up at Die before nodding. "Fine... but it better not end up on the internet or something!" 

"Not a chance in hell. Trust us, Kyo, we know how to be discrete about Die's business and your business is the same as his. No one else's but ours." He smiled and when Die leaned in, he took the photo and then showed Kyo it was just going to their parents with a message of not sharing with anyone else.

Die grunted and eyed his brother. "Just one last question. How long have you all been talking about what gender I should be boning?"

"The fucking part? Mmm... well... just the fucking part, we try not to outright talk about. It's awkward for Mom and Dad. But personally, I kept hoping you were boning your American friend and just hiding it so you'd be on the right track for yourself. But... this is better, Kyo's much nicer."

Kyo raised an eyebrow. "American friend...? Which American friend? Should I be worried?" 

Die sighed. "He's talking about Jon and no... I didn't bone him. Not for lack of his trying way back when, but he got the hint and stopped."

Kyo snorted slightly and shook his head. "Oh, well, good." He grinned slightly then stepped out the door, waving to Die's brother. "We'll be seeing you again I'm sure..." He didn't know why but he was suddenly ready to just have Die to himself. 

Die followed after, his brother waving and then closing the door behind them. They got back to the car and Die got in, sort of curling up in his seat and sighing softly. "Well... that went better than I thought it would."

Kyo got into the car then turned and pulled Die to him, hugging him. "Yes, I was honestly not prepared for your parents." 

Die nodded, hugging Kyo tightly for a moment. "Trust me... neither was I. He's not normally so... er... up front." He sighed softly and then pulled back. "I'm sorry you got stuck in the middle of it."

Kyo shook his head and smiled slightly. "It's okay... better now than later I suppose. At least we got that out of the way." He settled into his seat and started driving, heading home. 

Die flipped open his phone after a moment and groaned a little. "Great... Mom's asking if I've 'done the deed' with you. Not a question I want to answer to my mother." He exited the message and went to his app for ordering pizza. "What do you want on your pizza?"

Kyo grimaced. "Er... no, no it's not a good question for your mother." He puffed out a sigh then shrugged slightly. "I'm good with whatever." 

Die ordered a pepperoni pizza and left it at that, sending the order and putting it on his card. Another message came in and he looked horrified, closing his phone. "Oh good god. I know she has good intentions, but Jesus fuck." He waved a hand at his phone. "Contaminated."

Kyo raised an eyebrow. "Do I even want to know?" He was glad for the moment that his family wasn't in touch.

Die huffed out a laugh. "She sent me a picture of two naked... and quite aroused men that said 'good luck' under it." He tilted his head back and sighed. "She's always been... a bit more forward than most people."

Kyo looked a little aghast at that, shaking his head. “Christ..." There was no way in hell his mother would have even _looked_ at porn, much less send it to him. He finally pulled up to his place, getting out and getting the bags from the back and his own bag from the trunk. "How long til the pizza gets here?"

Die opened his phone to check and then murmured, "Fifteen minutes or so." He opened his mom's message and replied quickly and efficiently. _’Mom I don't need the porn, I'm not 12. I can get my own. As for the other question, not that it's any of your business, but yes.’_

Kyo nodded and started walking, shaking his head. "Are you telling her we've slept together? I'm not sure I'll be able to look her in the eyes."

"She won't stop this if I don't. We're talking about the woman who gave me my first porn magazine, lube, and condom." He made a face. "She won't bring it up if we don't. And now that she knows, I don't have to endure my mom sending me porn."

Kyo winced slightly. "Wow... your mom is... one of a kind." He chuckled and held the door open for Die, moving to the elevator. "I had to get my first porn from someone's older brother."

Die smirked a little. "Truth was... I was too much of a nerd in school. I'd have never ever managed to get it myself. And come to think of it... that magazine had more men than women in it. I guess she did know back then anyway."

Kyo laughed as he stepped onto the elevator, pushing the button then leaning against the wall. "Maybe or she at least had an idea." He grinned and reached out, running his hand down Die's arm. "I'm glad though... that you're out and they're okay with it... with me. I'd hate to be a source of upset in your family."

Die shrugged a little. "If you had been, it wouldn't have mattered. I'd have told them to go screw themselves. I've chosen who I want to be with and that's my business and mine alone. Like Kaoru... he can just kiss my ass."

Kyo frowned slightly. "I'd still hate it though... and Kaoru can go eat a dick." He stepped off the elevator when it stopped and went to unlock the door, smiling when Snowball greeted them with an adorable little mew. "Hi kitty, were you a good kitty today? Hm? I hope you didn't shed on the bed again." He chuckled as she bounced off. 

Die peered down at Snowball and then laughed. "Right... like she'd even remotely know not to do that. Her hair sticks to everything, drives the techs nuts trying to get it all off me before photoshoots." He winked at Kyo. "You'll have to tell them er... something... like you got a cat too unless you want them to know."

Kyo laughed softly, still watching the kitten bound around, toying with the laces of his boots. "Eh… let them think whatever. They're paid enough to keep their mouths shut. I am a bit freaked out about telling Nora though. Not that I think she'd care but I'm afraid she'll cock-block on tours." 

Die laughed and shook his head. "I somehow doubt she will. Honestly, she's the one who makes sure when I'm getting to that point where I can't stand it anymore, that I get a room to myself for at least twenty minutes. And I'm sure I'm not the only one she does that for." He knelt and took off his shoes, licking his lips a little and patting Snowball's head before he stood up.

Kyo cocked his head a bit. "Huh... I thought that was only my privilege.." He grinned then set his bags down, moving over to Die to kiss his lips lightly. "Gonna put the beer in the fridge since the pizza should be here soon-ish." He moved to the kitchen, sticking two beers in the freezer to get them extra cold for their meal then went into the bedroom for a minute. 

Die chuckled. "Yes well... for you I bet it's like every fucking night. For me, it's like three times a tour when I can't get my dick not to be hard anymore and it's killing me." He shrugged a little and then kissed Kyo back before the other wandered off. Die flopped on the couch, moving to lay on his back, feet and legs over the edge of the chair arm.

Kyo came back into the living room and made his way to Die, about to lean down to kiss him before the doorbell rang. He huffed and moved to answer it, getting their pizza and setting it on the coffee table. "Food's here. Want those beers now?" 

Die peered up at him and then smiled softly. When the other came in to kiss him, he leaned up, but he got blocked by the doorbell and he groaned, flopping back. "Yeah... beer now."

Kyo nodded and went to grab their beers, finally getting to sit down next to Die and going for that kiss now, making it a deep one. 

Die leaned up to get his kiss when the other came back, one hand snagging in Kyo's hair as he slowly delved his tongue into the other's mouth, tasting all he had to offer him with a low groan of pleasure. This was what he'd been waiting for all day. Private time and sensual, glorious intimacy with Kyo.

Kyo let out a soft moan of his own, his hand moving up to cup the back of Die's neck, feeling himself relaxing in a way that made him realize he'd been tense for most of the day and was now finally comfortable and at home. 

Die shifted a little and pulled Kyo into his lap, urging the other to straddle him so he could more properly make out with him right then. For some reason, he wasn't trying to ramp it toward sex, despite the desire to do so. Rather, he was just kissing him, being close to him and gently running his hands over the other's back.

Kyo moved into Die's lap, slipping his legs on either side of the other's, sighing into their kiss, sliding his hands down his back, rubbing softly. He could feel himself reacting slightly but ignored it, just truly enjoying the closeness. 

It was a few minutes before Die pulled back, panting softly, his cheeks flushed and his eyes filled with arousal. It was obvious he was already eager for something more, but he didn't say a word, didn't even try to do anything. He just smiled and lightly slid his hands from Kyo's back to his hips. "So... food?"

Kyo let out a breathless chuckle and nibbled at Die's lips for a moment, trying not to squirm from his body's reaction. "Yeah... food." He hesitated for a minute then smirked, shifting in Die's lap and getting comfy and reaching for the pizza box, setting it on his knees and opening it. "Looks good."

Die let out a soft laugh when Kyo settled on him and moved the pizza box to him. He smiled and licked his lips. "Does this mean I get to feed it to you then?"

Kyo snorted. "If you wanna." He pulled out a small piece and handed it to Die, grinning then opening his mouth. "Ahh." 

Die took it and then snickered, putting the tip of it in Kyo's mouth and waiting on him to bite it off and start chewing.

Kyo bit into the pizza, hardly able to chew for laughing. Once he was done with the bite, he grabbed the slice and held it up to Die's mouth. "Your turn." It was silly as hell, feeding each other like this but it gave him a wonderfully light feeling in his chest. 

Die gave him a smug little look and then took as much of a mouthful as he could muster, chewing and then swallowing. "It's... been a while since I had pizza," he admitted with a chuckle.

Kyo let out a laugh before eating the rest of the slice. "I see... it's been a while for me too to be honest and simple though it is, this tastes pretty damn good." He grinned and picked up another slice, smirking at Die and taking a huge bite of it, just to show he could.

Die finished off the rest of his own piece and then reached for a second one as well. "This is the first time I've ever had someone sit on me and eat though... I have to admit to liking this very much."

Kyo swallowed and smiled a little softly. "I kinda like it too. It's... intimate." He reached for his beer to take a drink then finished off the second slice as well, considering a third but deciding against it, instead leaning up to lick some pizza sauce from the corner of Die's mouth. "Messy..."

Die looked a little startled at the lick and then flushed, his dick jumping right along with him, lifting the pizza box a little. He caught it and cleared his throat, hoping Kyo would just blame that on a leg spasm or something.

Kyo glanced down at the pizza box and laughed softly, kissing the side of Die's mouth. "You're rather cute when you're jumpy." 

Die tilted his head back and shook it a little. "God I feel like a teenager."

Kyo grinned and nipped at Die's lip a bit. "Well... I have something that might make you feel less... teenager-ish." 

Die reached for his beer and took a long drink from it before setting it aside on the table. He studied the other, wondering what on earth he could mean and he let out a soft, "Mmm?" as his way of wondering what was coming.

Kyo shifted a bit and reached into his pocket, pulling out a key and pressing it into Die's hand.

Die blinked down at what he was given, his head tilted a little and then his lips parted and his eyes came back up to stare at Kyo. "You... I... my own?" His heart pounded in his chest and if he'd been even a little more drunk he'd have probably started to cry, always having been a total sap.

Kyo licked his suddenly dry lips and swallowed a bit, looking up at Die. "Well sort of... uhm… Die... will you… will you move in with me... officially?" 

Die pushed the pizza box off to the side and grabbed Kyo, hauling him completely against him and pushing his hand into the other's hair. Maybe some would have considered it fast. He probably should have as well. But the truth of the matter was, they'd been close to one another for more than a decade and he didn't feel like any of this was moving faster than it should have given the time they'd really known one another. "Of course," he breathed out. "I will." He pulled back a little and studied Kyo, wondering how to ask what he should keep and what he should sell or put in storage somewhere, but not quite knowing how to ask it.

Kyo let out a little gasp as Die pulled him close but then slid his arms around the other, nuzzling against him slightly. He knew it was sort of sudden, but it just felt so right and frankly, he was tired of waiting. "Good...." He leaned in and softly kissed Die's lips, murmuring against them. "Thank you." 

Die kissed him back ever so gently and then made a little sound. "So... how are we going to decide what I'm bringing with me?" he asked, knowing his clothing wasn't an option, but almost everything else was.

Kyo rubbed Die's back and shrugged slightly. "Bring whatever you want, we'll make room... or we can toss it all and get new, make it totally ours instead. My furniture is... simply functional more than anything." 

"I have an attachment to... very little of it. But admittedly most of it is expensive." He tended to be a bit of a fashion whore when he let himself, shopping for the sake of it at times. It was one of his rather girly traits and he knew it.

Kyo chuckled softly and shrugged slightly. "Well, I admit that I like your taste so... perhaps we can integrate your stuff in with some of mine and then pitch other bits. I am fond of my bed though." 

Die smirked. "I can't argue with being fond of your bed, mostly because that's the bed I've been intimate with you in." His eyes danced with pleasure at that comment. Not even really realizing what he was doing, his thumb had moved to the vein Kyo had just above the level of his pants, stroking lovingly over it.

Kyo chuckled then let out a soft moan as Die stroked that vein, the feeling going straight to his cock. "I… uhm... mmm…." 

For a moment, Die didn't know what had gotten into Kyo. After a few more though, he realized what he was doing and moved his hand to Kyo's thigh. "Ah... well... I guess you know part of you that I'm a bit obsessed with now, don’t you?" He flushed and shook his head a little, hair falling in his face.

Kyo chuckled slightly, shifting a bit in Die's lap. "I won't complain if you indulge in your obsession." He leaned in and pressed his lips to Die's, this kiss a bit more heated than the ones before it. 

Die let out a rather guttural sound, kissing Kyo harshly for a moment before literally standing up, holding Kyo to himself and heading as well as he could toward the bedroom. He was done with this holding back thing for the time being. His dick was aching and he just wanted to fuck Kyo senseless right then.

Kyo groaned into the kiss then let out a sound as Die hoisted him up, eyes darkening as he sensed the sudden urgency of the other's mood. Once they were in the bedroom and close to the bed, he tilted his head to scrape his teeth over Die's neck, running his tongue over the vein there. 

Die crawled on the bed and laid Kyo down, shifting over him and never letting him go. He only moved enough to snake one hand in and start undoing his own belt buckle and then pants. His dick hurt from the confines of his pants and he'd be damned if he wasn't going to free it.

Kyo clung to Die as he laid him down then watched him free himself, reaching down to assist by pulling the other free from his pants, stroking him lightly. "Damn baby... so hard for me already?" 

Die could feel the heat rush to his groin the moment Kyo touched him, a groan leaving his lips as he just enjoyed it for a moment. "You'll find... that I'm always hard for you, Kyo." He shifted to getting Kyo's pants undone instead, smirking softly.

Kyo chuckled softly then let out a groan of his own, his hips jerking slightly. "Apparently baby... the feeling's mutual." 

"Mmm... so I can see," he murmured, licking his lips a little and then shuffling down Kyo's body, taking him in his mouth without even hesitating long enough to give away what he was doing.

Kyo watched Die,letting out a loud moan as the other's mouth descended on him, his length throbbing. "Nng, Die~" 

Die bobbed his head over the other's length, obviously enjoying himself, his cheeks flushed and his entire body holding all the signs of intense arousal - rigid shoulders, arched back, his hips pitching forward every few seconds... and just the way he sucked dick was like he was getting high off of it.

Kyo could damn near cum just from watching Die go at him, his back arching slightly as he reached down to tangle his fingers in the other's hair, moans spilling from his lips. 

Die slurped and sucked, moaning as he went after Kyo's dick like it was the most glorious thing ever. He was arousing himself beyond how he'd been with Kyo up until now, really letting completely go and allowing him to realize how much he honestly loved going down on someone like this.

Kyo watched Die with some fascination, his cock jerking in the other's mouth as he sucked him like a damn porn star. Before he knew it, he could feel his orgasm building rapidly and he let out another guttural sound as he exploded into his lover’s mouth. "Oh… FUCK Die!" 

Die kept right up with what he was doing, sucking almost desperately. He took all the other had to offer him and swallowed almost all of it. The last bit, he spit into his hand and rubbed on his dick, using it as the world's best lube. He shifted up over Kyo, one hand propping him up, the other working Kyo's pants down enough to expose him, then positioning his dick, eyes pleading for this to be allowed.

Kyo shuddered as he came, loving the feel of Die swallowing it. When the other spat into his hand, his eyes widened a bit and he groaned at the look on Die’s face, nodding his head and shifting to get one leg free from his pants so he could spread open for the other. "Fuck me into the mattress, baby."

Die pushed the pants aside and moved to the correct position, pushing his dick against him, slowly sinking in, loving the feel of using Kyo's cum as the lubricant for this. He only hoped they'd done it recently enough that the other wouldn't be in too much pain. He held his control on a fragile little wire, so close to snapping, to losing it.

Kyo let out a loud, piercing moan as Die entered him, the use of his cum making it so much more intense and erotic. He looked up at the other and reached up to grab him by the hair, dragging his head down for a hard kiss then hissing against his lips. "I said... fuck me." 

Die let out a little huff of a snarl into the other's mouth, hunching over him and starting to quite literally fuck the hell out of him. He was desperate and every single ounce of his being spoke of it, the way his every movement was frenzied, the way his heart pounded, the way he felt almost close to tears from the intensity of his arousal right then. Just from letting himself go while pleasuring Kyo.

Kyo held on for the ride, his cock still hard despite having cum once already. He fed off the intensity Die was radiating as he bucked his hips up, He continually panted out Die's name as he reached up and dragged his nails up the other's back. 

Die alternated between watching Kyo's eyes and then looking down to watch their joining as he pumped in and out of the other. It aroused him so much to know it wasn't just a meaningless fuck, it was _Kyo_ he was fucking, the man he'd loved for so long, the man he'd do anything for. 

The sounds Kyo was making were becoming inhuman and loud as he thrashed under Die, his muscles tensed and tight from the effort of it all. After another moment, he screamed out loud enough for the neighbors to hear and came harder than the first time, spurting onto his stomach and chest, Die's name somewhere in the incoherent sounds he was making. 

Die felt something like shock filter through him. He groaned loudly, as he thrust more erratically, Kyo moving under him. He let out a huff of breath, stilling as he started to cum, just letting Kyo feel him as he filled him up. The relief of it all filtered through him, making him sag slightly against the other. "O-oh... oh yeah," he whispered out.

Kyo clung to Die as he felt the other's cum filling him, groaning more softly now, burying his head against a sweaty neck. He shuddered and wrapped his arms more securely around Die, letting his body clench around him briefly then relaxing into the mattress with a sigh. 

Die shifted enough to slip out of the other, curling himself around him, his body shivering from the way he had exerted himself with this. His hand moved to stroke at Kyo's hair, giving him loving attentions after the almost violent way he'd taken him.

Kyo curled up against Die, his hand soothing the scratches he'd put on his back, nuzzling into his neck and kissing the skin there lightly. "Mm... love you."

"I love you, too," he murmured softly, smiling down at the other. "That... that was _really_ good," he offered.

Kyo let out a soft chuckle and kissed Die's cheek, whispering out a bit hoarsely. "Yes... yes it was… so damn good." 

Die dropped his head and closed his eyes, flushing a little. "I um... I hope I wasn't too… overzealous with my actions," he murmured. "Sometimes I get really into it... and well... you know."

Kyo snorted and shook his head, coughing to clear his throat. "Not at all but I've been overzealous with my voice." He laughed and brushed a hand through Die's hair. "I get the same way, baby, but I'm not delicate. I've taken it without prep _or_ lube before." 

Die chuckled a little. "I'll remember that rough edge is all my fault and I guarantee I'll end up hard as fuck each time I remember it." He shifted a little and closed his eyes. "And what I actually meant... was the uh... blowjob." And really how he'd acted like a porn star while sucking him.

Kyo smirked a bit. "Somehow, I like that idea." At Die's clarification, he grinned widely. "Oh that. That was fucking hot, baby. I wouldn't mind if every blowjob was like that." 

"I... really enjoy sucking dick... as if that wasn't obvious." He snorted and tilted his head back, rolling over onto his side, closing his eyes. "I still remember the first time I got to suck someone off... God I was aroused as hell. As much as I like being dirty, this tops it so much."

Kyo shifted and turned to look at Die, licking his lips. "Again, I'm not complaining, baby. Not in the least. You're absolutely gorgeous with your lips my dick." At the other's mention of his first BJ, Kyo raised a questioning eyebrow. "Tell me about it?" 

Die stared at him for a long moment and then pursed his lips. "Are you really okay with hearing about my past conquests?"

Kyo licked his lips and shrugged slightly. "Die, baby... they're a part of you and your past. Besides, you're with me now, not them."

Die gave a little nod. "Well... if you're okay with it, then good." He chuckled a little. "The first time I got to suck a guy off, I was really fucking drunk... and this guy had been at four of our stops already, eyeballing me every single time. He didn't seem to even know the band, just kept watching me." He shrugged. "Being drunk and stupid because of it, when I ran into him that night, I gave in and talked to him. He hit on me so obviously I couldn't possibly have misunderstood. He followed me to the bathroom and it didn't take us long before him taking a piss and starting to stroke himself turned into my mouth on his dick." He paused, gauging Kyo's reaction.

Kyo listened to Die's story, trying to think back to the tour he was talking about but couldn't remember. When Die finished, he just snorted and shook his head. "Holy crap..." 

"It was... well, the first time I really knew what I wanted the most. And let me tell you... from that point on, every fucking time you wore those damn track pants and pitched a tent in them, it was the hardest thing I'd ever done not to shove you against a wall and suck the hell out your dick."

Kyo let out a faint groan at the very thought. "Hnn... I wish the hell you had ,that would've been exactly what I wanted and needed in those moments." 

Die reached down to run his fingers through Kyo's drying cum on his belly. "Trust me... I'll be doing that real well from now on. Don't be surprised if we get denied for a while that I'll end up shoving you against a wall regardless of who else is around."

Kyo licked his lips and watched Die's fingers on his stomach, muscles twitching a bit. "Somehow... I know I wouldn't give a fuck." 

Die let out a little growl and pushed himself to sit up, getting up and heading toward the bathroom. "I can't get enough of you. I feel like a rabid, horny dog."

Kyo moved to follow Die, smirking a bit. "You can hump my leg any time, baby."

"Oh, it's not your leg I want to hump," he replied, going to start washing up, cleaning his dick and then putting his pants back on correctly. "I think it's like I'm making up for all the times I've wanted you and haven't had you... you know?"

Kyo chuckled and grabbed a washcloth, wetting it and cleaning himself up. "Yeah, I definitely get that."

The guitarist offered a smile to the other and then reached to gently run his hand over the vocalist's cheek. "So... tomorrow we can go and get some of my stuff then?"

Kyo turned to place a kiss to Die's palm then nodded. "That works for me."

"Good. I think this is going to be actually... a lot of fun." He grinned happily at the other.

Kyo leaned up and kissed Die softly. "I hope so. Hell, we've practically lived together on the tour buses and stuff." 

Die held him close as he kissed him back. When he stepped back, he gestured Kyo after him. "The rest of my beer is in there. Can't leave it half-drunk now, can I?"

Kyo let out a laugh and went with him. "Of course not... and I could use another slice of pizza." He smirked. "Worked up an appetite." 

"Quite!" Die went and plopped back on the couch, handing a piece of pizza to Kyo, grabbing one for himself and snatching up his beer, taking a few swallows.

Kyo flopped down next to Die, leaning against him as he ate his pizza, peeling off a pepperoni and tossing it to Snowball, who was watching him longingly. "This is nice." 

Die snickered. "She's gonna love you so much. Sharing your food and all. That's all it takes to be her best friend." He nudged the other with his knee. "It is nice."

Kyo chuckled and reached out to scritch her chin before tilting his head up to look at Die, just smiling. 

"No fur on the bed, hmm?" He grinned at him, knowing she'd gotten the other into her fuzzy little paws.

Kyo pursed his lips and huffed. "Shush..." 

"Mmmhmm," Die chuckled and finished off his slice of pizza and his beer in record time. He shifted back and pulled up his shirt, lightly running a hand over the little swell of his belly from the food, a bemused sort of look on his face. "It doesn't stop amusing me when I eat enough for this to happen," he offered by way of letting the other know why he was doing what he was.

Kyo finished off his slice as well then watched Die rub his stomach, looking down and placing his hand over it, chuckling. "You made a food baby." 

Die smirked. "That... I very much did." He laughed. "And it'll be just like all that terrible mpreg shit. I'll poop the 'baby' out."

Kyo choked out a laugh before smacking Die in the stomach. "That's disgusting. You're not allowed to poop here. Remember, we're Gods... we don't poop." 

"Hey! If I can't poop here, then I'll have to keep my place to do it in!" He arched one eyebrow at Kyo. "And we don't want that, now do we?"

Kyo huffed and rolled his eyes. "Fine... just as long as you don't do what Toshiya did that one time after he ate real Mexican for the first time." He wrinkled his nose and shook his head. 

Die looked horrified. "That's what a fan and spray are for, that man has no respect for other people's noses and we all know that from the bus."

Kyo nodded, snorting slightly. "I swear he did that on purpose. There was a window in that bathroom, too!" 

"He probably did because he's a jackass." He laughed. "Remember when he used to fart and then wait on us to smell it and see who'd cave and leave first?"

Kyo laughed. "Oh God, yes. What the hell was he eating? Skunk ass?"

"I think so." He chuckled and then crossed one leg over the other. "I drink beer all the fucking time and even I don't manage to smell like that. But he did... all the time." 

Kyo shook his head. "I don't smell even remotely close to that unless I'm sick or something." He looked up at Die and grinned. "This is some sexy talk, isn’t it baby?"

Die laughed. "Hell no! Now tell me all about how you had to piss once and that's hot. This... nope." He made a face. "Definitely not into that... end... of things."

Kyo chuckled softly and then smirked. "So one time… I was on stage and I had to piss so bad that I nearly pissed my pants."

Die hadn't really expected the other to go along with it, after all it'd only been to prove a point. But instead he was apparently getting a hell of a story in exchange. "Oh?" He tried to remain looking calm and unaffected for the time being, though surely he was failing. "Do explain in more detail."

Kyo chuckled softly, giving his lover a knowing smirk. "Well, we were overseas at the time and it was one of the shows I was wearing my track pants. Anyway, I'd made the mistake of having a couple before the show and they went straight to my bladder along with the water that I normally drink on stage." He wrinkled his nose. "I was gonna go before the encore, but there wasn't enough time so I did the whole thing in misery before finally stumbling off stage and just pissing right into a bucket." 

Die swallowed hard and then shivered, feeling his nipples getting hard from the story. It aroused the shit out of him and he couldn't even begin to help it. "Fuck I wish I had paid attention," he mumbled. He closed his eyes and imagined the whole thing, trying to place the time, the concert. This was definitely going in the spank bank, that was for damn sure.

Kyo ran his eyes over Die, smirking slightly as he reached out and flicked his thumb against one of the other's hardened nipples. "I'm surprised you didn't notice. My eyeballs were practically floating. I think even let a little loose in my pants."

Die groaned both at the contact and the admission. He wasn't too into the wetting aspect, only when it was associated with pure and utter desperation, which was exactly what Kyo was describing. And it was just the way he liked it, a little tiny accident and full-on desperate pissing somewhere unusual. He huffed out a soft sound and then licked his lips. "Tell me something... was it the same thing again the night you were wearing khakis? Because I had a serious mental debate as to if you pissed yourself of jizzed yourself on stage."

Kyo flushed slightly and licked his lips. "That was jizz... because I worked myself into such a damn frenzy that I couldn't hold back." 

Die groaned, his head tilting back again. Somehow that was even better. "Be more descriptive," he pleaded with him, already feeling like he was going to have to solve a quick pants problem of his own in a few minutes.

Kyo gave Die a little smirk. "I was hard up and in desperate need of a serious fucking, preferably from someone that, at the time, I couldn't have." He glanced up at Die's face. "Anyway, I was riled up the entire day and was supposed to have gotten some 'me' time, but it never happened. When we got on stage, I threw myself into the performance and was sufficiently channeling my energies to that... until someone thought it'd be a good idea to start humping their guitar in front of me." 

Die instantly jerked up to look at Kyo, his mouth open in a little 'o' shape. "Really? It... it was me? I caused you to lose it? On stage? In front of everyone?" He looked sincerely shocked.

Kyo laughed softly. "Well, it was several things, but you were at the peak of it all. I'd found myself halfway wishing we were still doing fan-service. I'd have come and humped your ass from behind or something." 

Die let out a groan. "You know... I'd never have stopped you and I'm sure a lot of the fans would have enjoyed it." He smirked at him. "I hope you know that I'm so totally putting all of this in the spank bank."

Kyo laughed and leaned forward, nipping Die's bottom lip. "I'm sure a few girls would've creamed their panties for sure... and that's fine." To be honest, the idea of Die getting off to his stories turned him on and Kyo found himself squirming slightly. 

"I can't say I've ever jizzed myself on stage, though I used to get damn close to pissing myself. My bladder wasn't doing so well for a while there and I would get to the point of almost losing it every single night before we'd go off for the encore." He smirked a little. "And that's the closest I've come to telling the fans about my... likes. I told them it was happening on purpose."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "That's rather bold of you. I remember that though and remember thinking it odd that you would purposely put yourself in that situation. That was before I knew or even thought of you having that fetish of yours - which, by the way - I think about nearly every time I take a piss now." 

Die smirked a little and then peered up at him, letting out a tiny groan. "Really? You know... you should just let me know... talk to me about it... text me.. send picture mail." He winked a little and laughed.

Kyo snorted then held up his finger, shifting and standing up, going to the hall and coming back with his phone. He flipped through the pictures for a minute then held it out to Die, showing him one with a clear view of his dick and piss coming out of it and into a toilet. "I took this the other day, just haven't had the chance to send it."

Die took his phone when the other came back, peering at the photo on it and then letting out a keening sort of whine, moving to send it to himself, shooting off the image and then flicking back to it, feeling the last little bit of his control over his dick slipping away. He licked his lips and felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, letting him know he'd gotten the image. "Fuck," he hissed out, the vibration feeling good.

Kyo licked his lips as he watched Die's reaction, his own dick giving a sharp throb. "Tell me baby... do you like vibes used on your dick?" 

Die flushed a little and then nodded. "I do... there's this little bullet I used to use, just put it in my palm with some lube and jerk off with it set on high." His hips shifted a little, making it obvious his dick was achingly hard.

Kyo reached down and ran his hand over Die's dick, groaning softly. "I have a couple... one I use sometimes to fuck myself and another that I use mainly on my dick." 

Die groaned, pushing his hips up toward Kyo's hand. He closed his eyes a little and then murmured, "I know it's an odd request... but can we just jerk one another off?" 

Kyo licked his lips and nodded, palming Die through his pants. "In here or you wanna go to the bedroom?" 

Die huffed softly and then murmured, "In here." He shifted over, moving to sit up and then tugging Kyo over to sit down next to him. "C'mon, baby." He immediately went about opening his pants, pulling his dick out.

Kyo hummed and got comfortable next to Die, unzipping and freeing himself, groaning softly as he gave it a few strokes. "It's like I or my dick can't get enough of you." 

Die laughed softly. "Eventually we're gonna have chafed dicks and then we'll have to stop for a while. Until then... fuck like rabbits." He took his own dick in hand and watched Kyo's actions, stroking himself and looking pleased about it.

Kyo snorted and shook his head. "I don't think I could stop even then." He stopped talking then and focused on his cock, giving it long, slow strokes, making a show of it for Die. 

Die watched the other for a long few moments before he moved his hand over to Kyo's lap, coming in around the base of his cock and starting to help him jerk off. "Did you ever think of piercing it?" he asked softly.

Kyo groaned as Die's hand joined his own, licking his lips. "I have... several times actually." He shifted and reached out to return the favor, wrapping his hand around Die, sliding his thumb along the underside. "Why? Would you like me to?" 

Die let go of his own dick, just letting Kyo do the work on his while he worked on the other's. He enjoyed feeling the not-so-familiar dick in his hand, not his own that he'd known his entire life, but his lover's whose he was still getting to know. It aroused him even more that the other was willing to just talk with him while they were doing this, like it was everyday business. "I don't know... I've heard you're out of commission for a while after."

Kyo closed his eyes for a moment, just feeling and enjoying Die's hand on him, the slight roughness that came from years of guitar playing providing a certain kind of sensation that he thoroughly enjoyed. He continued moving his hand on Die, exploring the other's dick with his fingers. After a moment, he looked up and nodded. "Yeah, so I've heard... I think if you get it done like underneath, you can still use it."

Die shivered a little, arching into the other's touch, implying he wanted things to ramp up a little more. "Maybe," he breathed out, getting past the being able to use his brain for its intended function part and into the oh-god-it-feels-so-good phase.

Kyo groaned lowly and shifted forward to catch Die in a heated kiss, his hand moving faster over the other's cock, his own hips bucking slightly as he moaned into his mouth. 

Die leaned in as well, free hand snaking down to grope at his balls. He shivered slightly as he slowly started to spear his tongue into Kyo's mouth, his hand jerking the other off perhaps a bit roughly.

Kyo sucked on Die's tongue in a somewhat lewd manner, another groan sliding out as Die got a bit rough with him, his cock starting leak pre-cum. He slipped his other hand up to tweak his own nipple, his hips jerking. 

Die was sure they were making quite the sight and he honestly was enjoying the fact that they were. He moaned into the other's mouth, arching up toward the other, humping a little, knowing he was intensely close to his edge already.

Kyo curled his tongue around Die's as he bucked into the other's hand. He tightened his own fingers around Die's cock, jerking him faster, unable to stop the sounds sliding past his lips. It felt so damn good to be like this with Die and he was almost sad that he was so close already. 

Die moved one leg up and then shoved himself slightly up toward the other, knowing when he came, he wanted to put it all over Kyo's pants and cock if he could. Excitement ramped up quite a bit in him and he pulled back from the kiss, panting harshly.

Kyo let his head drop back when they parted, moving his free hand to grip the back of the couch to steady himself. After a moment, he looked at Die again, seeing the pleasure there and groaning. He glanced down at the other's cock and stroked it harder, squeezing tighter when his hand slid over the head. 

Die's hips bucked a little and he murmured, "Just a little firmer, baby," he pleaded, his hand working quickly at Kyo's cock, never once faltering, his grip on the other sure and true.

Kyo did as Die requested, tightening his grip on the other's dick. He watched his face, panting heavily as he got nearer to the edge. He was close, but wanted to watch Die lose it. 

It only took Die a few more strokes after Kyo tightened his grip to cum, a groan slipping free of his mouth. His cum was a bit thin with his jerking off earlier in the day and then Kyo and him fucking, and now this. But he still managed to splash Kyo's dick with the second spurt, the rest dropping over his pants, Die's hips jerking.

Kyo watched as long as he could as Die painted his pants with cum before groaning out loudly and bucking into the other's hand, losing it as well, spurting onto the edge of Die's shirt. 

Die groaned as Kyo's dick started to pulse in his hand. He spit out a string of curses, jerking Kyo rather vigorously until he was done. Once he was sure Kyo was finished, he let out a soft chuckle and then licked his lips a little, leaning back. "Mmm... you're... gorgeous."

Kyo sat back on his knees after he'd finished, pulling his hand up to lick the bit of Die's cum that got on it. "And you... just… mmm." He chuckled and flushed a little. "God... you've stolen my ability to use words."

Die leaned in, gently kissing him and then murmuring, "Don't worry... I'll give it back... when you need it most." He smiled.

Kyo smiled softly, brushing his other hand over Die's cheek. "How can I expect you to give me anything when you've given me so much already?"

"I'll never stop giving as long as I possibly can," he murmured quietly, finally moving to let go of the other's dick and then started to clean his hand off with some tissues.

Kyo sighed and shivered slightly when the other moved his hand off him, leaning in to peck Die's cheek before shifting into a sitting position and closing his eyes for a moment. "I feel like I'm going to wake up and this will have been a dream." 

Die frowned a little, putting his pants back on properly. "It's not... I've already made sure in every way I can that I'm awake. And if I am... you are. Trust me."

Kyo chuckled and pulled Die to him, nuzzling his neck a bit. "I do trust you..." 

Die rolled his head to the side and then chuckled. "Well tomorrow should be interesting, given the um... porn I have."

Kyo snorted lightly and shrugged. "I'm intrigued. We'll get popcorn and watch porn all night after we're done bringing your stuff here." He grinned. "It can't possibly be _that_ bad." 

"You might take that back after you see how cheezy half of it is." He chuckled a little and then leaned back, closing his eyes. "Mmm... overall, today has been quite nice I think."

Kyo hummed softly, suddenly feeling rather sleepy. "Mmm, overall, I would agree..." He ran his hand lightly over Die's knee, glancing at the other then smiling. "Thank you..."

"Maybe we should call it a night?" he asked quietly, thinking it maybe best they go and sleep before doing a lot of moving shit tomorrow.

Kyo huffed out a sigh and nodded. "Sounds good to me, baby." He stood and stretched, then reached out for Die's hand. 

Die stood as well, taking Kyo's hand and walking beside him to the bedroom... no... _their_ bedroom. He couldn't wipe the goofy smile off his face at that, feeling on top of the world.


	6. Chapter 6

Die stood in the middle of his living room, boxes all around him and a tablet in his hand. He'd taken Shinya's advice and picked up an iPad so he could catalog what he wanted to get rid of, what he was keeping in storage, and what he was taking to Kyo's. He swallowed a little and huffed out a sigh as he scrolled through, looking for where he'd put his couch on the list.

Kyo came out of the bedroom carrying a box of Die's regular DVDs, huffing slightly as he set them down on the couch. "This is the last of them aside from your porn. There are some that I have, but I don't think we'll have many duplicates." He looked up at his lover as he wiped sweat from his brow. "You okay?"

"This is gonna drive me nuts," he murmured softly, shaking his head. "Shinya's idea was all fine and dandy until I forgot to catalog something." He sighed and then flopped down on the couch. "Maybe... I don't want to do this by a friggin’ catalog."

Kyo hummed softly and took the iPad away from Die, tossing it onto a pile of clothing that had yet to be boxed up. "Die, don't worry so much about it. It'll be fine." He leaned down and pecked Die on the lips, giving him a smile. "So... what exactly did you tell Shin about moving anyway?" 

Die watched the other toss the iPad aside and then peered up at him, enjoying the brief moment of the kiss. "Mmm... well... I didn't actually explain and he kept his nose out of it. I just said I was moving and all my stuff couldn't come with me. He gave me his advice and that was that."

Kyo nodded, satisfied with the answer. He knew they'd have to tell their bandmates eventually, but he wasn't exactly ready to spill the beans yet. "It sounds like a good idea but if it isn't working for you, don't force yourself." He gave Die’s leg a pat then moved to start folding and boxing the clothes the iPad was on. 

Die stared at his clothing as it disappeared into the box. "You know... you'd think we wouldn't have to do this ourselves... and you'd also think I wouldn't own this much shit." He laughed and shook his head, pushing himself back up. "I'll... take care of the err... questionable stuff in my bedroom... and bathroom... and," he turned around and headed back to the couch, reaching under the cushion and pulling out a porn mag before heading back toward the bedroom, "this."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "I half-ass considered hiring movers that packed too, but it seemed a little too risky... and you do own a lot of shit, that's for sure." He grinned then looked interestedly at the porno mag. "Want my help?" He was definitely curious about Die's collection. Not so much because it was porn, that rarely did anything for him but he was more intrigued because the other seemed so keen on hiding it still. 

Die paused in the hallway and debated it. He weighed his options. Either Kyo would find out by it being in his house or else he'd find out right now. It seemed better for him to find out now and if he reacted negatively Die could just 'lose' part of it along the way. He lifted a hand and gestured Kyo along with him, heading to the bathroom first.

Kyo licked his lips and stood to follow Die, wondering about the other's attitude. Surely the porn couldn't be _that_ bad... right? He shrugged lightly and moved to lean against the frame of the bathroom door. 

Die opened the sliding glass cabinet with his meds in it and reached around the back, pulling out a single small magazine. He tossed it on the top of the other one on the counter. This one was just a plain old porno mag, men fucking women. It was what he'd deemed safest to hide in a 'public' space. He then reached in the shower, opening a shampoo bottle and tipping it, a slim dildo slipping out. He tossed the shampoo bottle out then and quickly rinsed the dildo in the sink. He dried it off and then gestured at the bedroom. "Okay, bedroom."

Kyo glanced at the porn mag and then looked up at Die tipping the dildo out of the shampoo bottle. "Clever..." He grinned a little and turned to follow Die further down the hall. "How many other little hiding places do you have?" 

Die smirked a little. "That's it in the house. The rest is fairly obvious. But you'd be surprised on tour." He chuckled a little and then moved to the bedroom, first opening his bedside table drawer, revealing all kinds of lube, condoms, and a few toys. 

Kyo chuckled lightly then peered into the drawer. "Think you’ve got enough lubes ?" He picked up a purple vibe that had ridges on it, rubbing his thumb over them as he thought about how it would feel to use it. "Have you used all of these?" 

Die lifted his eyes to the other's face and then nodded. "Yeah... I have. There's one that I haven't, but it's in the closet. It arrived like... the day before we got together. Haven't had a need for it." He started moving things into an empty box, tossing the mags in first and then adding his toys and whatnot on top.

“I see...” Kyo grinned a bit then watched Die go about packing his most intimate things, snagging one of the mags and flipping through. It was fairly harmless, just a bit of male on male bondage. "Interesting enough..."

Die reached over and flipped to page 17, pointing at the shibari on that page, not saying a word, just pointing. He then moved to reach under the bed and pull out another mag, this one really one of the worse ones, featuring women doing dirty things. He tossed it in the box and then went to his closet, pulling out the vibrating, twisty-headed vibe and tossing it - still in the box - on the bed. He then reached up and pulled down a small open-topped box that contained some of his 'worse' DVDs, carrying it toward the bed.

Kyo stared at the shibari, running his eyes over the intricate knots and then imagining the person in those ropes as Die and let out quiet sound before snapping the mag closed and setting it in the box with the others. He glanced at the peeing mag and wrinkled his nose, though it was more the vaginas than the fetish. The vibe also intrigued him and he thought about how it'd be to use on Die or himself. After a second, he cleared his throat then glanced up at Die, peering into the box. "Is this your 'worst'?"

Die eyeballed him and then nodded a little. "Yeah... the 'tame' stuff is the stuff in the front to throw everyone off, thinking I'm just open about it. Right there on the shelf next to the other stuff.”

Kyo nodded then cocked his head. "Show me the one you're most scared to show anyone?" 

Die sat down on the edge of the bed and started rooting through his collection. He wasn’t entirely sure which was the one he was most scared to show, but he figured it would just sort of pop out. He finally settled on one, it was a video of trannies that looked pretty innocuous upon first glance, but reading the cover provided information beyond the photos. There was everything from pissing to full-on roleplay-rape scenes in it and a hell of a lot in between. He hesitated for a moment and then tossed it on the bed next to Kyo. "Not something you want your friends to find unsuspecting... also not something you live down once they do find it."

Kyo picked up the DVD and studied the back cover, raising an eyebrow then nodding. "I can imagine... I'd have been a bit shocked to find something so extreme but..." He tossed the DVD back in the box and shrugged. "Porn doesn't define a person..." He grinned slightly. "After all, I've watched some pretty sick stuff before..." 

"Let's say I went through a pretty dark period for a while there... and this isn't something you can just toss in the trash can and hope no one sees." He sighed softly and rubbed over his hair. "I have so much that I'd die if most anyone else found."

Kyo stood and went to Die, wrapping his arms around him from behind. "We all have our secrets, baby..." 

Die turned in his arms and pulled the other against him, burying his nose in the other's hair with a soft sound that meant he was relaxing. It was really all it took these days, just to surround himself by Kyo and his scent.

Kyo tilted his head to place a kiss to Die's chin, hands stroking over his back. "If you really want to get rid of it, let's go throw it in Kaoru's mailbox." He gave the other a wicked grin, the idea rather amusing to him. 

Die's eyes widened and then he started to laugh. "Oh god... no, I have a better idea. We put it in his gift box next concert. He'll never know who gave it to him or why."

Kyo grinned wider. "Perfect..." He dug through some of the other DVDs, not finding anything too horrible except one about cock and ball torture. With a wince, he held it up and pointed to it. "Please tell me this was just a curious thing..." 

Die glanced at it and then winced as well. "Yeah... pretty much. I wanted to know why on earth these men could want that. I think they must have fake balls or something."

Kyo grunted and tossed it back in. "I hope so, I couldn't stand it." He looked at Die and then around the almost empty bedroom. "Is that all of it then? Or do you have some secret wall panel?" 

"No more except what's in the front that's in plain view." He shrugged a little. "I took a lot of it with me the first time, just haven't taken it out is all."

Kyo raised an eyebrow then chuckled. "I see, okay then… looks like we should have a porn marathon or something." He honestly hadn't watched porn in a while, not having the time or need to. 

"My hard drive is worse..." he shrugged a little and then grabbed the box, heading into the front with it.

Kyo followed Die, snorting slightly. "Well, porn aside... what furniture were you thinking about? Remember, I can rearrange my stuff, too." 

Die put his hands on his hips and then murmured, "I'd like to keep my couch... I paid a shit-ton for it. And my TV and sound system are way newer than yours. We could move yours to the bedroom for lazy time. My coffee table can go in storage. If... that's okay with you."

Kyo looked over Die's couch and electronics and nodded. "That sounds great... it'll save us from having to shop. We could put your coffee table in the spare room if you like." 

Die nodded. "Sounds good to me. And that little table in the hallway, we're keeping for sure. It was my grandmother's, s'all I have left." He offered a fond little look at the memory.

Kyo smiled and nodded. "Absolutely, we'll put it in my... _OUR_... hallway and throw the one I have in there out. It's cheap anyway." He glanced at Die's couch again then closed his eyes, envisioning it in the living room and smiled. It would look good in place of his own and Die was right about the TV and sound system. 

Die reached for Kyo's shoulder and pulled him into his arms, just holding his lover for a few minutes. "Hey... Kyo... do you know how to dance? Like... couples stuff, not what you do on stage."

Kyo curled his arms around Die, humming softly until the other spoke. He looked up at him and flushed slightly. "Erm... well... not very well." 

Die brushed blonde hair back from the other's face, peering down at him, his eyes full of unspoken emotion before he dipped his head and initiated a sweet, sweet kiss. 

Kyo blinked slightly then closed his eyes, kissing Die back gently, reaching up to caress the other's cheek. His heart flip-flopped in his chest as one word echoed within his mind. 

Die kissed him until he was breathless, parting ever so gently, leaving a trail of little kisses over Kyo's lips before he completely leaned back up. "This... is everything I ever hoped for and so much more. I just want you to know that."

Kyo stared up at Die, almost clinging to him. "I..." His voice broke and he had to clear his throat before beginning again. "I never thought I'd ever find... this." As he spoke, he moved his hand to rest against Die's heart, feeling it beating against his palm. 

In all his time Die had never heard Kyo's voice break like that when it wasn't from the strain of pushing it too hard on stage. It brought a lump to his throat and butterflies to his stomach. "You mean the world to me." And he just prayed they'd never fuck this up.

Kyo just nodded and leaned in to place a kiss on the spot his palm was before biting his lip and pulling back slightly. "I honestly don't think... I could live without you." 

Die studied him, feeling something like agony grip his heart at the other's statement. He'd always known deep inside that Kyo didn't toy with love for a number of reasons, but this one still came down like a vice on his heart. The idea of Kyo dying wasn't something he wanted to think about. Not now, not ever. He pulled Kyo against him tightly, long arms holding him in place as he kissed the side of his head and did his best not to cry. He knew with as long as he'd been harboring feelings for the other, he honestly couldn't go on if Kyo chose to take away this fragile life, and even that found a way to choke him up. He couldn't say a word, just holding him tight and close.

Kyo swallowed thickly and clung to Die, eyes squeezed shut as the emotions of the moment coiled tightly around his heart. He knew then that he would never leave Die's side, no matter what. His love for the other was too strong, built silently through the years even unbeknownst to himself. He finally gathered himself a bit and murmured against Die's chest. "I love you, Daisuke." 

Die hugged him back fiercely. "I love you, too..." he hesitated for a moment and then murmured, "Tooru." He loved him for everything that was him now and everything that had been him through the years and that wasn't likely to change.

Kyo's eyes popped open and he glanced up at Die, the most sincere smile gracing his lips at the sound of his birth name coming from the other. "You remembered." It was an odd thing to be happy about since he’d often mentioned that he detested his real name but nonetheless, hearing it come from Die’s lips paired with those three little words really meant quite a lot to him.

Die offered him a watery smile and then cupped Kyo's face in his hands again. "I remember a lot of things... do you still remember the first time we met? Like twenty seconds in the bathroom at some seedy club we were playing at?" 

Kyo brought his hand up to rub over Die's arm, chuckling softly. "Yes, the place was awful. I remember thinking that I didn't even want to risk pissing in the urinal for fear of some super germ jumping onto my dick." 

Die laughed, glad the moment was growing a little less heavy. He was always wary of heavy moments when it came to Kyo especially and he'd hate to leave the other brooding for long. He licked his lips a little. "Yeah... but you just sort of dropped it on me that I was a good guitarist and you thought I should leave ka.za.ri and join you."

Kyo grinned, taking a breath that seemed to shake the thick fog of emotions surrounding them. "Yeah, well, sometimes you just have to get straight to the point!" 

"And the best part... I didn't say it right then because I wanted to draw it out... but I was going to say yes from the moment you asked." He pushed his hand into the other's hair and shook it just a little, leaning in with a soft growl. "You're a convincing little bastard, you know that?"

Kyo chuckled and reached up to tug Die down for a quick kiss. "I would apologize, but I'm not sorry. I knew you were eager to get away from your other band anyway..." 

Die pressed his lips to Kyo's and then pulled back, chuckling. "Mmm… I was... but if we don't get to packing again, this will never get done." A bit sadly, he pulled back and went about tossing some stuff into a box.

Kyo huffed lightly, but kept his smile in place, turning to go stack Die's dishes he'd wrapped earlier into a box marked _fragile_. "You have some pretty nice pots and pans, I might just toss mine."

"One can never have too many pots and pans, Kyo. We're probably gonna wanna keep most of them from both of us." He gestured toward the kitchen. "Like the rice cooker, yours is just fine, but a backup is always good."

Kyo nodded and moved to put said pots and pans into another box along with utensils and miscellaneous kitchen things. "Very true, where do you want the knick knacks in here?" 

"Put them all in the 'free' box with the exception of the little egg timer. I'll let the neighbors pick through that box because I know they know me and well... I bet one of them will at least take anything that's left." He smirked a little, knowing they had at least one fan on his floor.

Kyo hummed and started gathering them up, putting all of them in the box Die indicated except for the egg timer and a little picture frame magnet with a photo of Snowball. He set those in with the kitchen stuff and closed up the box with tape, letting out a sigh. "Almost finished... the place looks... well, empty." 

Die finished up with the living room, lovingly placing the few plants he had in a box and already debating where they'd go in his new home. "Just the last bit of my bathroom stuff and that's it."

Kyo watched Die with the plants, smiling a bit. "Okay, I'll go call the movers then. They came highly recommended as having dealt with… celebrities." He hated using that term to describe anything to do with himself but every once in a while, it was the only thing that fit. 

Die smiled, coming by to gently kiss Kyo on the lips. "You're a doll for having found them. I had no idea where to even start." He took the last box and headed down the hall to the bathroom, starting to rake things into the box, starting with the shower and then migrating to cabinets and drawers.

Kyo grinned, pecking Die's lips back then picked up the _fragile_ box, heading out to his car and alerting the movers that were already waiting that they could begin, informing them of the furniture items that would be going. 

Die, for his part, made a call to Gara, a relatively good friend, offering some of his stuff to the other man and getting an enthused response. He told him what it was and how big, telling him to let him know when he'd be ready to come get it before the month was up.

Kyo went back up to Die's apartment and leaned against the wall while the other was on the phone. Once the call was finished, Kyo moved over to Die and ran his hand over his arm. "The movers are on their way."

Die glanced at Kyo and then nodded. "I wonder who's gonna want the bed," he murmured, scratching his head. He had no idea what to do with it if no one else wanted it.

Kyo thought for a moment. "We could offer it as an extra special FC item... I'm sure there are some fangirls out there that would love to roll around in your sheets, whether you're there or not! 

Die snorted. "I was just going to say that. And hey... I wouldn't put it past some of the boys as well. Don't underestimate the power of hormones."

Kyo chuckled. "True... but I think the logistics of it all would too much to deal with. We could always put it in storage or something. You never know when you might need an extra bed..."

Die nodded a little. "Okay, sounds good. I mean it's not that old, so it should be fine. Just need to find a way to wrap it up before putting it in storage."

Kyo pointed to the men entering the apartment. "They can do it. It shouldn't be a problem." 

The guitarist glanced up at the men coming in and then nodded. "Good deal... I have a storage locker... it doesn't have much in it, but I guess that's where it's going."

Kyo nodded. "That works for me, I was just trying to determine if there was space in my own storage for it." He picked up another box of Die's stuff and glanced at the other, murmuring softly. "You're not... sad or anything... about leaving your apartment?" 

Die glanced over at him. Honestly, he wasn't really sad about it, though he supposed he was feeling a bit on edge. He shrugged. "Not sad in the least." More like praying they were making the right decision together.

Kyo offered Die a slight smile and reached out to squeeze his hand lightly when the movers were in the other room. "Good... shall we?" He gestured to the box in his hand. 

Die gave a little nod, going to grab his most sensitive boxes so the movers couldn't snoop and balancing the two plus his guitar, he gestured at the door with his head. "Your car with this stuff?"

Kyo picked up another box. "Yep, I think it'll all fit in the trunk or backseat. Your guitar can go in the backseat at least." He led the way out into the hall, pushing the elevator with his hip. 

Die waited patiently behind him, a smile on his lips. "This is perfect." Even with any worries, this was still perfection for him. Being with Kyo and knowing he was actually going to be officially living with Kyo was nothing short of amazing.

Kyo glanced up at Die and smiled softly. "I've been thinking the same thing all day... I've already got ideas for re-arranging our place to include your stuff."

Die's eyes sparkled. "Sounds like a plan... but not until tomorrow or my back will friggin hate me." He chuckled softly.

Kyo laughed a little and shook his head. "Actually, I was thinking more like next week or something. I think tonight's going to be one of those 'grab take-out and eat it in our boxers kind of nights." 

If Die had had a hand left, he'd have high-fived Kyo for an excellent idea. But as it was, his hands were full and he had to settle on enthusiastically replying, "Damn right!" The elevator dinged and they slipped inside, Die managing to hit the button for ground floor.

Kyo grinned and leaned against the wall of the car, letting out a sigh. "You're hot... by the way... when your hair is all up in a ponytail and you're wearing that tank top." 

Die cast a sideways glance at the other and flushed a little. "You think so?" He thought he looked like hell like this.

Kyo nodded. "I do... because it's the real you, not put together or anything for the press, etc." 

"You're the sweetest, you know that, baby?" He smirked a little and stepped out once the elevator arrived on the ground floor. He allowed Kyo in front of him to lead the way to his car, not really remembering where the other had parked.

Kyo flushed the slightest bit then lead Die to his car, setting his boxes down to open up the trunk before arranging them inside while leaving enough space for the others. "I think that'll about do it..." 

Die added his boxes to the trunk and then opened the back door, putting his baby in the back, making sure it wouldn't slide into the floor if they had to make any sudden stops. He closed the door and glanced at Kyo, a little smirk growing on his face. "Do we supervise or?"

Kyo watched Die settling his guitar in like a child and had to smile. The smallest thought of a long away future flashed through his mind before he shrugged slightly in response to Die's question. "That's up to you... they know what to get and are being paid well for their discretion." He'd outright insisted on covering the cost of Die's move and refused to let the other pay one cent on it. 

Die shrugged a little. "My key's on the hall table, so as long as they don't miss taking that, then we're good I guess. Does that mean we just go and wait for them at your... our place?"

Kyo nodded and grinned. "Yeah, they'll call if they have any questions or anything. Did you get everything you wanted to bring yourself?" 

Die nodded. "Yeah I'm good with whatever we've got right now I suppose. Most of the important irreplaceable shit is here... except grandma's table, but it won't fit in here."

Kyo chuckled softly. "Your grandmother's table will be fine. I told them that if they broke it, I'd use the pieces to perform a prostate exam on them." 

Die let out a laugh and shook his head. "I'm actually certain you would, that's the best part." He opened the car door and slid into the seat, buckling up and settling in.

Kyo grinned and hopped into the car as well, getting situated before starting the engine and pulling out and onto the road, heading towards **their** place. 

Once they had been driving a bit, he reached out and squeezed Die's leg, almost in a reassuring manner. 

Die reached down, putting his hand over Kyo's. "We should buy one thing together... something that will be ours just to symbolize this."

Kyo stopped at a red light and turned to Die, smiling softly. "What did you have in mind?" 

Die shook his head a little. "I don't know... anything in particular you think we're missing?"

Kyo thought about it for a moment then turned left instead of right towards home. "Well, with your TV and sound system... we need a new entertainment center." 

Die's eyes lit up at the prospect of it and he grinned happily. "This should be fun!" They could make that the centerpiece of their move, find something matching both Kyo's stuff and his own and join them.

Kyo smiled and pulled up to a popular, slightly high-end furniture place. "This is where I got my bed and some of the decorative stuff on the walls." 

"I'm so glad you liked my idea." Die squeezed Kyo's hand before opening his door and slipping out, waiting to make sure Kyo locked the car up with all his valuables in it.

Kyo stole a quick kiss, then went about locking the door and engaging the alarm. His windows were tinted but still, why take chances? "Of course I like your idea. To be honest, I was thinking the same thing." 

As they headed up to the store, Die found himself walking like he was on the highest of highs. He grinned happily as he moved along, humming softly. "Great minds and all that."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "Of course..." He wandered around casually with Die for a bit, looking at a few things here and there before moving over to the entertainment centers. 

Die followed after him, looking at a cute little cutting board set before catching up with Kyo and stuffing his hands in his pockets to keep from being mr-touchy with the items in the store.

Kyo studied the pieces for a bit before pointing to a rather nice one that would fit both the TV and sound system and leave room for other components and such. "What do you think of that style?" 

Die went over to it and picked up one of the informational cards, starting to read the stats and making some agreeable noises as he went through it. He put it back and then nodded. "Looks sturdy to me and it says they'll set it up for us, so no cursing at the damn thing and missing parts."

Kyo chuckled. "That's half the fun... but... I think it'd match your couch and my coffee table as well as fit nicely in the living room." 

"Oh, it's not fun... trust me, you do not want to see me trying to put one of these things together. I have literally thrown fits that broke other things in the house because of it." He gave the other a sheepish look.

Kyo just grinned and nudged Die lightly with his arm. "Fine, we can have them set it up. I don't want you to throw a fit unless it's in my bed." He smirked slightly then picked up the card to go inform the store that they'd be purchasing it, happy that they’d found something they both liked so easily. 

Die was glad no one was around to hear them harassing one another, if only because there were still people he'd like to know before the general populous. He padded along after Kyo. "Hey... we both have to pay equally for this. It's a requirement."

Kyo stopped and chuckled lightly. "True. Okay then, we'll pay together... but how?" 

Die glanced at the price-tag in Kyo's hand and then paused, looking around to make sure no one was paying attention to them. He pulled out a wad of cash, counted through it real fast and then handed it over to Kyo. "I'll owe you 50,000 yen. Stop by an ATM and I'll give it to you right after we leave."

Kyo blinked and hesitantly took the cash, he kinda didn't like it even though he understood the meaning of it all. "Okay, that'll work. I only have 10,000 on me so that wasn't going to cover it." He gave Die half a smile then made his way to the register, paying and setting up a delivery date and time. With his receipt, he turned back to Die and grinned. "Done, it's our's." 

Die watched the other pay, putting his wallet back in his pocket while he waited. When Kyo announced he was done and the center was theirs, he smiled and headed outside, holding the door for Kyo in an absent sort of manner. Once they were outside, he smiled. "Lucky I carry any cash on me at all."

Kyo walked with Die to the car, glancing up at him. "I rarely carry more than a few 100 yen really." He slid into the car and waited for Die to join him before heading out again, this time for an ATM. 

Die nodded a little. "Good practice... I think we all know someone who's been mugged. Never pleasant."

Kyo snorted. "Yeah. I'd really rather not lose my month's pay in one go." He pulled up to an ATM. "Wanna give me your card and number so you don't have to get out?" 

Die handed his card over and then flushed before he muttered out, "0216". As if that didn't tell a lot about how long he'd had Kyo at least on his list of people he truly cared about.

Kyo took the card then blinked at the number before smiling softly and giving Die's leg a firm squeeze. "That'll be easy to remember..." He slid the card into the machine and entered the number then withdrew the money, thankful the ATM let him get that much at once. "Okay, that's it. Here's your receipt and card back." He grinned and handed the items to Die. 

Die was glad Kyo took it well. He took the card and receipt back when it was offered to him, wondering if Kyo had noticed how huge the balance was in his savings account. Everyone thought him a frivolous bastard, but the truth was, he was still wearing his chrome hearts shirts from well over eight years prior, taking tender care of them. "Yeah... I'd hope it would be," he murmured.

Kyo chuckled and pulled back out onto the road, heading towards home. "So... what are you going to do with all of that? You know you can spend it... right?" He’d seen the rather sizeable balance of Die’s account more by accident than anything.   
Die glanced at him and shook his head. "It's... let's just say it's the just in case. I mean we've already almost broke up as a band twice. It's never too early to be prepared."

Kyo frowned at the very thought, but nodded his head. "I guess you're right. I have some saved up, but nothing near that." He made a mental note to add more to his emergency fund the next day, suddenly feeling insecure, especially now that he and Die were together. 

"I'm... a freak of nature in preparation to be honest." The guitarist shrugged a little. 

Kyo hummed and, at long last, pulled up to their place, pleased to see they'd beat the movers. "Well, maybe it'll rub off on me." He smiled slightly and got out, gathering things from the trunk. 

Die reached to gently touch Kyo's cheek. "Maybe... and if not, we're good because I'm here and we're together." He smiled a little.

Kyo's smile brightened a bit and he leaned in, kissing Die softly. "Then you can do all of the preparedness stuff around the house." 

Die saluted and then grinned. "Will do." He got out and quickly went around to get his guitar and the other few things in the back seat, starting with that stuff.

Kyo laughed and waited until Die got his stuff, shutting the trunk with his hip and locking the car before heading in and right up to the elevator. "I'm glad we cleaned house beforehand."

"Right? If we didn't, we'd have all kinds of problems." He licked his lips a little and followed after Kyo, glad the elevator was waiting on them.

Kyo nodded, stepping onto the elevator. "Yeah, really. I didn't think I had that much useless junk laying around!" Once they were to their floor, he lead Die to the door and set the boxes down to open it up, grinning. "We're home." 

"Junk... dear god, I had no idea I had so much I could just toss in the trashcan until now." He laughed, stepping in and putting down his stuff and then turning around. "One more trip and we'll be back in home!"

Kyo chuckled. "Yeah, I'm not sure who had the most, me or you." He moved and set his own boxes inside the door then shut it again, going once again to the elevator. "I feel like I've ridden this elevator more times this past week than I ever have in all the time I've lived here." 

Die laughed. "I'm sure you rode it as many times when you moved in... you know, probably more since the movers will be doing most of the riding." He snorked. "In that manner, at least."

Kyo sniggered and gave Die a wink. "I'd like to do some riding on this elevator...." 

Die looked around, trying to see if there were any cameras on it. He smirked when he saw none and no place one could be hiding. "We'll see... we'll see."

Kyo licked his lips at the idea. "We will, hm?" 

"Oh yes, we will." He grinned as the doors opened and he stepped out, heading for the car, a new bounce in his step despite how tired he was.

Kyo chuckled softly, getting a good eyeful of Die's ass as he followed him. "You make me feel like a horny teenager most of the time..." 

"I am a horny teenager... in my dick and heart." He laughed and opened the trunk, pulling out another large box.

Kyo just grinned, picking up the last box. "I know." He shut the trunk and once again started for the building. "But you're MY horny teenager..." 

Die plodded back to the elevator, catching it just as someone came out. He slipped inside and managed to push the button to get to Kyo's floor. "Yes... yes I am." 

He started to make a snide comment about how Kyo was a lovely dick-hole, but decided that sounded incredibly non-romantic, so he left it in his head.

Kyo leaned against the wall of the elevator this time, close to Die. "I suppose the movers will be here soon with the rest of it." He made a slight face, not ever having been a fan of moving and unpacking, he just wanted it done. 

"I say we offer them money to unpack some of the more specific boxes. What do you say?" He laughed softly and shook his head a little.

Kyo grinned. "That would be amusing at least!" He knew some of their fellow rock stars would have had them pack up and unpack everything, no matter what it was. 

"Mmm... like the kitchen box... that should be no fun at all to unpack. Boring ass pots and pans." He headed to the door and waited on Kyo to unlock it again.

Kyo snorted and unlocked the door, moving inside and slipping out of his shoes before setting the boxes down. "I think we should make them unpack everything and be complete divas about where it all goes.

"There is not enough money in the world for the diva status I could accomplish, baby." He tossed the box on the floor, knelt and removed his boots and then retrieved the box, heading down the hallway to the bedroom to hide his dirty porn. "Bring the uh... questionable box?"

Kyo grinned. "I'd like to see you in full diva mode one of these days." He picked up said box and followed Die. "I think it'll fit in the closet." 

Die let out a, "Ha!" from the other room and then toed open the closet door, putting the box in the floor. He'd deal with it later to hide it more properly... or get rid of it. "Full-tilt diva mode is worse than Loki on a bad day, hunny."

Kyo laughed loudly at the comparison and shook his head, bringing the other box to Die. "Oh baby, it wouldn't last long. I'd fuck it right out of you." 

Die pulled Kyo to him and smirked. "Mmm... well, I know one good way to get some if you're holding out... for some... unknown reason."

Kyo gave his own smirk, running his hand along Die's chest. "Well, maybe I'll just do it on purpose." He almost laughed at the thought though, because he didn't think he could stand being without Die that way for very long. 

"Hey! That's no fair!" He snorted a little and glanced up when he heard a knock on the door. "I think they're here."

Kyo chuckled then grumbled slightly. "Alright, let's get this show on the road..."

"Hurray," Die murmured, actually smiling a little to counteract the tone of his voice. He plodded in, looking already tired.

Kyo followed and took over, directing the movers here and there with boxes and furniture pieces, just getting them in the generally right area and figuring he and Die could rearrange later. 

Die directed the second man on a few of the unmarked boxes, peeking in and seeing what was in them before telling him where to go.

A few hours later, Kyo sighed and flopped down on Die's couch that was now in place of where his used to be. The movers had finally finished up and left and he was just plain exhausted by this point. "Have I ever mentioned how much I hate moving?" 

Die flopped next to the other as well and huffed out a sigh. "God... about as much as I do?"

Kyo nodded and leaned back, closing his eyes for a few minutes before, reaching out and grasping Die's hand, squeezing it. "It was worth it though."

Die had to agree with the other. He smiled happily and reached to squeeze Kyo's knee gently. "This is all worth it... every single ache will be totally worth it."

Kyo smiled softly and shifted to lean against Die's shoulder. "Absolutely..." He sat there quietly for a few minutes then looked up at Die. "You know what?" 

"What?" Die asked softly, giving the other a heavy-lidded look and smiling happily.

Kyo licked his lips. "Your couch looks better in here and so does your grandmother's table." 

Die slid his arm around the other's waist and held onto him tightly. "Mmm... I think our things look really good together.”

Kyo smiled and kissed Die's shoulder. "I like that word... 'our'." He'd been alone for so long it'd seemed and now that he had Die, he wanted to build memories and buy things that were "theirs". 

"Ours... such a... ring to it." He leaned in to kiss his cheek and then moved, getting up and going to go and get something from the kitchen. He came back in and settled down next to Kyo, holding out a little white box. "For... us."

Kyo blinked as Die left then took the box, opening it. A big grin spread on his face as he saw the éclairs and he leaned over to kiss Die softly on the lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby." He pulled one out and then offered it to Kyo, holding it next to his lips. "Open up." He chuckled right after.

Kyo grinned widely and opened his mouth, tongue flicking out to catch a bit of the icing. 

Die groaned a little and licked his lips. "Mmmm... that's right, keep doing that right there."

Kyo had to laugh slightly but he continued, leaning for a bit to lick at the icing slowly, digging his tongue into the pastry to get to the cream inside. "Mmm..." 

"I'd tell you to suck it, but that'd be awkward." Die laughed and shook his head a little. 

Kyo swallowed the bit of cream and laughed. "I think it's a little...soft for that." He grinned and took a bite before taking it from Die and offering it to him. 

Die waved his hand a little and chuckled. "I have another one for me, this one is all for you."

Kyo shrugged and went back to eating his, slowly, making sure to dip his tongue into the center and tease Die with licking the cream out of it. "Mmm... this is so good." 

Die chuckled and flopped back, licking his lips a little. "Mmm... you're so gorgeous when you do shit like this," he murmured softly.

Kyo finished off his éclair then blushed slightly. "Mmm... I don't think so. I think you are." He licked his fingers before wiping them on a napkin and picking up Die's treat, holding it out to him. "The initials are a nice touch by the way." 

Die grinned. "I thought they were and no... I insist... you're most gorgeous to me." He leaned over and took a somewhat dainty bite of the end of the pastry.

Kyo laughed softly and leaned in to peck Die's cheek as he chewed. He was happy in a way he couldn't even put into words. Everything seemed so wonderful right then. He let out a little sigh of contentment, not even realizing he was staring at Die. 

Die moved to eat a bit more of the éclair, not bothering to be all dainty any longer. He smirked and allowed himself to eat it like a man, meaning most of it all at once. He grinned and popped the rest in, chewing and swallowing before responding. "Yeah, I enjoyed doing something cute."

Kyo chuckled and leaned forward, kissing Die's sticky lips. "Mm, you can do something cute all of the time for all I'm concerned. It just makes me love you more." 

"Then maybe I shall." He winked at him and then licked his fingers to get the rest of the pastry off them.

Kyo laughed softly and just watched Die, reaching out to gather a bit of cream the other missed, swiping it with his thumb then licking it off. 

Die sighed softly and turned to peer at Kyo, his look relaxed. "Should we unpack my clothing at least? No wrinkles?"

Kyo considered it for a moment then nodded. "Sure, we can do that. Are they all in the bedroom now?" 

"Yeah, they put the boxes on the closet floor. So it'll be easier to get going on putting it away. If we're lucky the most important shit will be on top." He smirked a little at him.

Kyo stood and laughed. "It'll all be on the bottom then." He led the way down the hall to their bedroom, grabbing a box and scooting it towards Die before popping open the one underneath. "Ooh I get your t-shirts. Exciting." He grinned and started unpacking them, laying them on the bed for now.

Die opened up his box, finding all his various pants. He smiled, starting to get them out, ripping open the bag of hangers to hang up the ones that would wrinkle if put in a drawer. "So... what side do I get and which drawer... or drawers? Or are we just tossing in and mixing?"

Kyo glanced up from putting one of Die's shirts on a hanger and shrugged. "Well, I figured we could split sides. Like I have underwear on top so just shove it to the side and put yours there? As far as the closet goes, I don't care." He grinned. "We could just start wearing each other's clothes and see if anyone catches on!"

Die chuckled. "I like the sound of that." He motioned. "I'd like right, if possible and I'll just put things in the closet. Pants with pants, shirts with shirts and so on."

Kyo nodded. "Works for me." He went back to unpacking the box, refolding a couple of shirts before raising an eyebrow and pulling out what looked like a piece of black lace. "Please... tell me these are yours."

Die hung up some of his most worn pairs of pants, sitting and starting to put things on hangers in the floor after that. He glanced over when Kyo spoke up and his eyes widened significantly. "I... er..." his face grew warm with embarrassment and he finally offered, "Well... remember how I said I liked putting on the old costumes? Maybe... it wasn't just our costumes... but just... costumes in general."

Kyo fingered the material then looked up at Die. "And... what costume do these go to?" He held them out and examined them, licking his lips as he imagined Die filling them out in all the right ways. 

Die ducked his head, going back to putting things on hangers. "Uh...the ‘my dick in them’ costume?"

Kyo let out a soft sound but didn't say anything else. He also didn't put the panties away either, instead he laid them on the bed near their pillows then went back to unpacking the box. The very idea of Die's dick trapped in that lacy material had his pants tightening. 

Die let out a little huff and quickly finished up with his box, stuffing things in the closet just after he was done, ensuring it was at least near the right area, but not being overly meticulous about it.

Kyo brushed against Die as he went to get another box, smirking to himself slightly as he started putting Die's shirts on hangers and hanging them up. 

Die dumped out the bottom of his box and stared down at his pile of normal underwear and the few panties mixed in. One pair bright red and silky, another lime green with little ties on the sides. Yeah... that was a fetish he hadn't quite admitted to, though it was also one he hadn't indulged in in a long time.

Kyo had turned around to ask Die if there was anything else and caught sight of the other panties. "Damn baby... how long were you going to hide this little bit of fun from me?" He picked up the red ones and grinned. "I think these are _definitely_ your color."

Die flicked his gaze up to him and flushed a bit again. "It's... been a while... I guess I actually sort of forgot. It wasn't an intentional omission."

Kyo chuckled softly and moved over to kiss Die's reddened cheek. "I'm only teasing you. I like some surprises." 

He studied him and then slowly started to relax. "So... you're actually okay with this then?"

Kyo ran his fingers through his hair and gave Die a smirk. "Baby, short of pedophilia, scat and a few other things, I'm okay with most fetishes, really." He ran his hand over Die's shoulder. "I'm not going to run off because you like to wear panties."

The guitarist looked incredibly more relieved, reaching for Kyo and pulling him into his arms, just holding him there. "You are the most forgiving and loving person I've ever known.

Kyo laughed softly against Die's chest, rubbing his back lightly. "With you, it seems to be a constant thing. Before, I would never have considered myself forgiving." 

"Really? Because you've always been like this with me... around me. You just used to be... darker... that's all." He shrugged a little. "But this Kyo... I've known this Kyo for a long, long time."

Now it was Kyo's turn to blush and he looked away, biting his lip. "I think... I _know_ it's just with you that I can be... human." 

Die leaned down, kissing his way down the side of Kyo's neck and then catching his earlobe in between his teeth and tugging lightly before letting go and whispering, "You can be anything you need or want to be with me... as long as you promise to be honest with me. It's what I ask."

Kyo sighed softly and turned, sliding his fingers through Die's hair and tugging him down for a deep kiss. "I'm scared right now. I'm scared that you're going to be just a figment of my imagination and I'll wake up and you'll just be the guitarist of the band I'm in and won't have a clue how badly my heart, my soul _needs_ you." 

Die slid his arms around him, holding him tight. "Then we fear the same thing... we share even that to bind us together. This way... if we are just in a dream... we're in this dream together and we'll know it when we wake up." He knew it was irrational, but he didn't care, couldn't care right then.

Kyo just nodded and clung to Die, out of words to say. He turned his head and nuzzled Die's neck, placing light kisses to the spot where the other's pulse beat, feeling as if their hearts were synched up and beating as one. 

Die almost felt like the air was too thick, like the topic was too serious. He had to break it somehow or they'd spiral down together and he knew it. He grasped the first thing he could think of it and murmured, "Would... would you like to see me model those panties for you?"

Kyo took a breath and leaned back some, a smile making its way onto his face. "I would... very much."

Die licked his lips a little and huffed out a breath. He went to pick up the panties from where he'd tossed them at. He held them up. "Which ones? Black, red, or green?"

Kyo moved to sit on the edge of the bed and cocked his head. "Red for tonight..." 

Die put the others back and then held up a finger. "Hang on a second." He wandered out of the room and into the bathroom, stripping down and pulling on the panties. He then put his jeans back on and left his shirt off. He headed back into the bedroom and paused at the door, leaning on the frame in a manner that clearly implied a sexual nature.

Kyo raked his eyes over Die's form, seeing the panties peeking up over the jeans. He licked his lips and stood up, moving over to him and dragging his hand down Die's chest, over his stomach and eventually to the edge of his jeans, feeling the silky material of the panties. "Fuck baby..." 

Die's breath ghosted out, his body shivering faintly beneath the touch that he was so enjoying right then. Kyo's fingers felt like heaven as they raked down his chest and just under the edge of his jeans. He moved his hand to grasp the other's, pulling it down to his dick, pushing Kyo's hand against it through his jeans. "Make me hard in them before I show you."

Kyo groaned softly and nodded, squeezing Die through his jeans a bit as he moved a bit closer and leaned in to take one of his nipples into his mouth, flicking his tongue over it then biting it lightly. 

Die groaned softly at the feeling of the other touching his dick and sucking on his nipple at the same time. He shuddered a little. "Yeah... like that," he whispered out ever so quietly. His dick started to swell in his pants, his cheeks flushing in pleasure.

Kyo squeezed Die's dick a little more firmly, feeling him harden in his jeans. He moved to the other nipple and gave it the same treatment as before, his free hand moving to stroke over Die's side and down to his hip, nails scraping along the skin there. "You're so damn sexy Die." 

The guitarist let out a groan, his hips pushing toward Kyo's touches. He was already almost fully hard, his breath coming in short little gasps of pleasure. After a moment, he pushed Kyo gently back and shivered slightly as he took a step back and reached down to slowly unbutton and then unzip his pants, licking his lips a little.

Kyo blinked when Die pushed him back then let his eyes focus on the other's hands, biting his lip. "Show me baby. Let me see your gorgeous cock all wrapped in lace." 

Die started to push his pants down over his hips, hips slowly twisting as he pushed his pants down, letting them fall down his hips to the floor. He stepped out of them, coming back to stand in front of Kyo. The panties molded to his dick, the tip of it poking out over the top of them, unable to completely fit in the confines of them.

"Oh God..." The vocalist couldn't help himself as he dropped to his knees and began nuzzling his lover's cock through the material of the panties. He reached up to grasp Die's hips and ran his tongue along the length of him, up to the tip poking out. It was one of the sexiest things he'd ever seen. 

Die let out a surprised little sound, his hips canting forward at the feeling of the other licking at his dick through the material. He'd never had anyone play with him while he was in them and this was becoming a whole new aspect of it for him.

Kyo glanced up at Die as he mouthed him through the panties, loving the feeling of his lover's rigid dick underneath the silky undergarment. After a moment, he moved to lick at the tip while bringing a hand down to slip between Die's legs, fondling his balls then teasing the area behind them. 

Die let out a little whimper and shivered slightly. "Jesus, Kyo... slow it down some or I'm going to fucking jizz myself in about another minute and a half."

Kyo chuckled and pulled back, licking his lips. "Sorry, I couldn't help it..." He lightly stroked his hands over Die's hips, smirking up at him. 

Die let out a little laugh and reached to ruffle Kyo's hair. "Obviously... you like what you see." He pushed his hair back and then let go, moving over to the bed and crawling up on it, swaying his ass back and forth and then settling in a manner that was somehow reminiscent of a feline's posture when stretching.

Kyo stood and watched Die move to the bed in his sexy manner, reaching down to grope himself through his jeans that had become quite tight. He stripped out of his shirt and moved over to the bed, kneeling on it and reaching out to run his hand down Die's side. "Oh yes, I like a lot..." 

Die pressed his head against the mattress, letting out a soft moan as he swayed his ass back and forth. "Show me how much."

Kyo couldn't resist a swift smack to Die's ass before slipping his hands down to unbutton and unzip his jeans, pushing them and his boxers out of the way to free his achingly hard cock. "See what you do to me?" He swiped his thumb over the tip and pulled it away slowly, a string of pre-cum stuck to it. 

Die peered over at him and then let out a soft groan as he saw how aroused the other was. "Let me taste it, baby."

Kyo shifted closer to Die and reached out, running his thumb over his lover's lips. 

Die allowed him to smear it over his lips, then he licked it off, making a show of it and then moaning softly. "You always taste so good..."

Kyo groaned as Die licked his thumb then smirked slightly and sat back on his heels. "Why don't you come get a better taste." 

Die pulled himself out of the position he'd taken up and shifted over to Kyo, tugging his hips and yanking him down on the bed. Rather than leaning down to suck him like Kyo probably expected, he shifted over him, rubbing his silk-covered length over the other's crotch.

Kyo let out a small sound at being moved then watched Die, fully expecting him to go down on him. When he didn't and the vocalist felt him rubbing against his dick, he moaned deeply, arching his hips up. "Oh... _fuck_!" 

Die moved his position just a little to curl his arms around the other, just thrusting against him with the silken barrier between them. He had no intention of doing more, just wanting them to both soil his panties in the most lewd way possible.

The sensation of Die's dick trapped in the silky panties rubbing against him was driving Kyo mad. He wrapped his arms around Die's back and raked his nails along the skin there. 

Die groaned softly, one hand coming up to pull at Kyo's hair, yanking somewhat harshly as he continued to thrust against the other, moaning rather loudly.

Kyo hissed at the hair pull, turning to bite into Die's shoulder as he shifted slightly and thrust upward, positioning himself so that the head of his length had more contact with the panties. "Hn, baby, gonna cum in them for me?" 

Die groaned in a manner that clearly showed his pleasure in the matter. He thrust harder against him, burying his face against Kyo's neck as he worked toward his release. "God yes... I want you to help me dirty them. C’mon."

Kyo moaned and wrapped his legs around Die's waist, bringing their bodies flush together as he gyrated against him. He was close already and knew it would only take a bit more for him to lose it. 

Die chose his spot carefully, avoiding tattoos and finding a piece of nice, smooth skin before he sucked it into his mouth, groaning against his lover as he frantically humped him, his orgasm ramping up on him, so close he knew stopping right then would be hopeless.

Die's mouth on his neck pushed him over the edge and with a loud moan, he came, making sure to get most of it on the panties as he still bucked his hips, panting heavily. "Die!" 

Die could feel the warmth of the other's cum wetting through his panties and he couldn't hold it back any longer. He pushed his hips forward with a groan, his back arching and his head falling back as he shot his load. Most of it spurted out over Kyo's stomach, Die too out of it to realize he wasn't getting the panties like he'd planned on, the orgasm too good for him to give a shit right then.

Kyo groaned softly as he felt Die's cum painting his stomach. It was only after he was nearly finished did Kyo realize that he'd missed the panties and it made him laugh softly as he brushed his fingers through Die's hair. "God, baby..." 

Die's hips jerked involuntarily a few times, pushing his dick through the cum on the other's stomach and he groaned softly. "Fuck... I so needed to cum," he hissed out, a little laugh right after. "That felt so fucking good."

Kyo smirked and trailed his fingers through the mess before wiping them on Die's soiled panties. "Uh huh...it felt damn good having you rub against me like that..." 

The guitarist let out a little laugh, nuzzling against the other. "And they say... that with gay men it always has to be intercourse. Proved them wrong, didn't we?"

Kyo laughed and turned to kiss the side of Die's neck, which was where he could reach. "I'd say... we've proved a lot of those foolish sayings wrong."

"Indeed." Die rolled over to the side, rubbing at the panties, getting the cum really rubbed into them and then making sure his dick was fully in them. He reached for Kyo's hand and pushed them over his dick in the panties, his hips flexing a little. He gave the other a dirty look and then got up, heading into the bathroom.

Kyo watched Die, a soft groan leaving him as he rubbed the cum in, messing the panties up even more. When the other grabbed his hand, he helped him run the cum in a little. "Dirty..." He shifted and got up, following Die to the bathroom to clean up, smirking. 

Die glanced at him as he went to the toilet. He pushed the fabric down out of the way and started to relieve himself into the toilet with a sigh of relief. Post orgasm piss was always the best.

Kyo just watched for a moment, squirming the slightest then giving up and moving over to the toilet, joining Die in pissing with a slight groan. "So... answer me this, would you rather be caught doing dirty things... or not?" 

"Mmmm... not, I'd think. When I get real caught up in being incredibly dirty, I don't like to be caught. The potential for someone to be horrified is far too high." He shrugged. "But like being caught in an alleyway or something, no big deal."

Kyo nodded and reached out to run his finger over a particularly wet spot on Die's panties, licking his lips. "Makes sense..." He pulled away and finally went to get a wet washcloth, cleaning himself up before getting one for Die. "On another subject, I don't think I could ever get tired of seeing you in those... damn."

Die pushed the panties down and stepped out of them, a little flush on his cheeks. He kicked them over to the hamper and then flushed the toilet, starting to clean up with the cloth he was given. "Mmm... I should think not."

Kyo just leaned against the counter, watching Die clean up. He smiled softly as he thought about how damn cute his lover looked when he got all flushed. 

He finished wiping up and then tossed the cloth over the panties, the gesture seeming accidental, but covering them so completely it could only be on purpose.

Kyo chuckled softly and went to tug on a pair of boxers, flopping down on the bed with a sigh and grin. 

Die traipsed after him, going to sit next to him, not bothering with underwear. He flopped backwards on the bed and huffed out a little sigh. "That really did feel good."

Kyo turned and laid down half on Die, half off and grinned, kissing his chin. "Yes, it really did. I expect you to do that again sometime... soon." 

Die smirked. "Mmm... I will, I promise." He leaned up and kissed the other gently, letting out a pleased sound and then flopping back, a stupid grin on his face.

**To Be Continued…**


	7. Chapter 7

Die sat in the living room, his laptop on the corner of the couch arm. He and Kyo hadn't done anything for a few days and frankly, he was getting to the point he desperately needed release. He used to be a two-to-three times a day kind of guy and not having done anything at all since two days before, he finally gave in to the urge while Kyo was out. 

He'd hunted down his favorite site for some guy-on-guy action and pulled up two of his favorite videos in different tabs, alternating between them while he got himself nice and worked up. It didn't take him long before he opened his pants and took his dick in hand, starting to jerk off while he watched the guy on screen start to spurt his load into the other's spread asshole. Dirty, but effective for fapping, he decided.

Kyo was tired. He'd had a photo shoot and he hated photo shoots, especially when they insisted on several different retakes. Finally though, he was allowed to leave and he very quickly made his way home, ready for some Die cuddle time. He smiled slightly as he let himself into the apartment, quietly toeing off his shoes then walking into the living room. The sight that greeted him was not something that he was expecting and had him frozen in place for a moment, biting his lip against the groan that threatened to slide out. 

Die had switched to the other video, completely oblivious to Kyo being in the house at all, his headphones preventing him from noticing much of anything except what he was currently watching. The second tab showed a couple frantically fucking while pressed up against the side of a car, like they couldn't take the fact that they had to go the twenty steps to be in the apartment complex and just had to fuck right then, right there instead. He let out a little moan, his hips pushing up into his hand as he got a little more vigorous, going in time with the thrusting the men on screen were doing.

Kyo moved further in the room for a better look, smirking as Die didn't seem to hear him at all. He watched for a bit longer, slipping his hand down to press against the growing bulge in his pants. 

Die clicked a link off to the side of the second video, immediately moaning fairly loudly as a guy took his dick out of his pants while on a public train, several people around him. The man started to stroke his cock, pausing and letting out a spurt of piss onto the seat in front of him before he continued masturbating, one of the other passengers watching him attentively. Die paused in his own fapping, head tilting back, his eyes closed as he pushed, a little stream spurting out of his dick and onto the floor. "Oh shit." Instantly, he stopped, pushing his laptop onto the couch fully and yanking his headphones out, scrambling to grab a handful of tissues and start pushing them into the carpet. "Fuuuuckkkk... he's gonna kill me. God damn it!"

Kyo raised an eyebrow as Die switched to the pissing video then pissed himself, watching it splatter to floor. He bit back a slight laugh as his lover cursed and frantically started cleaning up. He slipped up behind Die and wrapped his fingers around his throat. "Tsk....pissing on the carpet, Daisuke? For shame...." 

Die froze the moment fingers closed around his neck. But a moment after, he realized it was Kyo and relaxed at least a little. But he could feel his temperature steadily rising with his embarrassment. He'd been caught, not only with porn and his dick out, but completely missing his pants and pissing on the floor in his enthusiasm for his jerk-off session. He huffed out a breath and then murmured, "Does it matter that I seriously did not mean to and that I'm going to clean the hell out of this before I do another thing?"

Kyo kept his hand where it was and leaned into Die so that he could feel the obvious tent in his pants. "I don't know... it looked like it was on purpose to me." 

Die let out a soft moan at the feeling of Kyo's dick pressing against him. He closed his eyes, his hands still pressing tissues into the mess on the floor. "Was supposed to be my pants."

Kyo tightened his hand on Die's throat slightly then ran it down his chest and over his stomach, finally reaching his dick and running his fingertip through a droplet of piss there. "Did it feel good...?" 

The guitarist let out a little groan, his hand clenching in the tissues. "Yes," he whispered out, his dick jumping a little at Kyo's touch, making it obvious how incredibly horny he was right then.

Kyo smirked and gave his lover's dick a couple of strokes before moving back. "Well, don't let me stop you... go on." He'd deal with the messy carpet later and if it didn't come clean, he could blame it on the cat. 

Die shivered a little when Kyo told him to go on and do it. He almost felt like he'd cum if he even tried right then, though admittedly, that didn't sound like a bad thing to him. He swallowed thickly and sat back, taking hold of his dick. He stroked it slowly and then aimed for under the table, letting out a little spurt and then groaning. With Kyo watching, and evidentially approving, it was even better. He shifted slightly, peeing a little more right in front of where he was sitting at. He had the worst urge to piss the couch, but he was sure Kyo didn't look forward to waiting on this to be cleaned up either, though he eyed it real well, wondering if maybe he'd just give him permission since it was leather. "Such a dirty fuck," he muttered out.

Kyo watched Die piss in the floor, something about it making his cock throb. He couldn't help groping himself while he watched, licking his lips. "Are you done? Or is there more?" 

"I've had a few beers... trust me... there's more," he murmured, looking up at Kyo and seeing him grope his dick like that. "Take it out... let me see how hard you are for me." He licked his lips a little, lifting his dick and pushing with another grunt, letting his piss arc out a ways onto the carpet. He kept going for a little while, the piss making a wet noise as it landed in the forming puddle, the sound really getting Die off right then. His free hand went down to grope at his balls, doing so a bit roughly.

Kyo quickly freed his own dick, proving that he was rather hard at the moment. He smirked a bit as he leaned into Die, grinding against his ass some. "Damn baby. I love watching you be dirty." He reached down and grasped Die's dick, aiming it at the couch as he humped against him. "Go on, it's leather, it'll wipe up... make a nice puddle for me." 

Die rubbed himself back against Kyo's dick, pushing his jeans and underwear down more so his bare ass was against the other's dick. The moment he gave him permission to go on the couch, he lost the rest of his control, pushing hard and letting his piss hit the back of the seat where he'd been sitting, watching it splash down on the seat and then dribble off the front onto the carpet. His hips jerked a little as the last few spurts came out and he grabbed Kyo's hand. "Oh fuck, jerk me off. Please. I'm so goddamn close. Please!"

Kyo groaned when his dick slid against Die's bare ass, not being shy about grinding against his crack as he watched Die's stream splash and pool on the couch. "Fuck Die..." At the other's request, he wrapped his fingers tightly around his dick and started stroking him hard and fast, his actions a bit rough. 

Die didn't even have to wait more than maybe fifteen seconds before he stared to cum, copious amounts of it spurting out over the couch and carpet while he damn near screamed from the pleasure of it. He clung to Kyo like a lifeline and then hissed, "Oh god... fuck me. Fuck me now."

He moaned lowly as Die came, stroking him through it then pulling his hand away, surveying the mess briefly. He didn't hesitate to comply with Die's begging, glancing around then finding a bottle of lube, quickly smearing some on his dick before pushing Die over onto his hands and knees, not caring that it was right into the mess as he pushed into Die's ass as slow as he could stand, a grunt issuing from his lips. "Fuck yes!" 

Die ended up on his knees in the mess, but he didn't give a shit right then. He knew this was going to be loud and he reached for the remote for the sound system, turning it on to some loud English music and tossed the remote out of harm's way, letting out a gasp as the other pushed into him, glad he had just cum so he was more relaxed. It stung a little, but nothing excruciating. "God, baby... I made you so hard, didn't I?"

Kyo leaned down to growl lewdly into Die's ear. "I almost jizzed myself watching you piss on the carpet. You're so goddamned sexy when you really let go." He shifted back and grabbed Die's hips, thrusting in the rest of way before grabbing up the bottle of lube and pouring more down Die's crack, using his thumb to rub it around a bit. He waited just a moment then began fucking Die harshly, his nails biting into his hips.

Die groaned, his back arching in an elegant sort of manner, his ass sticking up in the air. "And here I was," he gasped, "freaking out... and all along..." another sharp intake of breath, "you enjoyed seeing me."

Kyo chuckled darkly, dragging his nails over Die's ass then smacking it. "I should tie your ass up and flog you for it..." He smirked then reached up to push Die's head down, his face close to the mess. "But you're so fucking dirty, you'd probably like that..." Letting go of his lover's neck, he went back to the task at hand, thrusting into Die's willing body. 

Die let out a groan as Kyo started talking about tying him up and flogging him. It'd been a long time since someone had done or even threatened such a thing and he thought to himself that he'd very much enjoy it if Kyo decided to. When Kyo pushed him down toward his mess, he resisted as much as he could, not wanting his hair or face in it, wincing a little. 

Kyo smirked at Die's resistance, not really intending on getting piss on the other's face, but his mood was on the sadistic side tonight. He didn't push too far though, easing them both back a bit before resuming his thrusts, feeling his cock already throbbing in anticipation of filling Die with his offering.

The moment the other started thrusting in just the right way, Die set up a racket of moans and cries, sounding closer and closer to a woman with each moment that passed them by, the pleasure too intense for him to hold back the sounds, especially after he'd already cum.

The sounds spilling from Die's mouth only drove him further and he practically pounded into his body, animalistic growls and grunts coming from him. He was so damn close, his balls drawn tight against his body. 

Die felt a white wash of pleasure shoot through him, his body trembling from the force of it. It was only a few seconds after that he realized he'd cum a second time without so much as a touch to his dick, spilling himself out all over the carpet beneath him.

Kyo felt, rather than saw, Die cum a second time and that was all it took for him to lose it, shooting the first spurt into Die's ass, then pulling out to let the rest of it hit his back and then thighs, smirking a as he claimed his lover's body in such a lewd way. "O-oh.. _yes_!" 

Die groaned at the feeling of Kyo starting to cum, the warmth of it in him and on him. He was shaking like a leaf, almost unable to keep himself upright right then, little whimpering sounds escaping him every few seconds in his dazed sort of state.

Kyo finally finished and collapsed back onto the half of the couch that wasn't messy, pulling Die with him and shuddering slightly. "Damn baby..."

Die shakily picked up his laptop and put it on the table, looking a little dazed with the whole thing. "This is gonna take half the friggin’ evening to clean up," he murmured, a stupid grin plastered on his face nonetheless.

Kyo chuckled softly and placed a light kiss to the side of Die's neck. "Yeah...but it was worth it." 

"We shouldn't wait so long in between. Apparently I can't take waiting so long." Die sighed softly and turned his head to peer at Kyo. "I was so worked up..."

Kyo hummed softly, slipping his arm around to stroke Die's tummy. "I could tell. You didn't even hear me come in..." He let out a little sigh and made a face. "Touring is going to be even more hell. We're going to either have to tell everyone or at least tell Nora... so we can get some time alone every few days."

Die let out a soft grunt as he stretched into Kyo's touches. "Nora would understand... though since Kaoru knows already, I don't see the point in hiding it from the others either honestly." 

Kyo pressed his forehead to Die's shoulder. "I suppose not but... what if... what if it rubs them the wrong way?" He looked up at Die with a slightly anguished look. 

"Then we'll deal with it. It's not their place to judge us for what makes us happy, Kyo. And if at least some of them can't see it our way, then they're not half the people I thought they were."

Kyo smiled slightly though he was still feeling anxious. "I suppose you're right. Besides, I think Kaoru's reaction was the worst we'll get."

"Toshiya has no room to talk as far as I'm concerned. And Shinya I don't think would chance anything to make you angry at him." He shrugged a little. "Some things are too valuable to lob off."

Kyo hummed. "You're probably correct. I'm just paranoid I suppose." 

"Nora would never risk saying things to us that wouldn't go over well." He shrugged. "Plus she's open... she might give us a lecture on what happens if we break up and whatnot, but I think overall she'll just be happy we're doing something steady."

Kyo frowned at the very thought of having to hear a 'breakup' lecture but shook it off and just nodded. "It will probably be a relief to her that you're in a relationship and she doesn't have to look out for you getting into trouble." 

"Yeah... tell me about it. She'll see me as scandal free in comparison to usual." He smirked a little.

Kyo laughed and pulled Die to him, pecking him on the lips. "You, my dear Dai, are a scandal all by yourself." 

He licked his lips a little and shifted slightly, feeling like he should really start cleaning up. "That... I am. The only thing I pray she never finds out is my piss fetish." He made a face. "That would not be good at all." He pushed himself up and held up a finger as he went down the hall. He came back with carpet cleaner spray and two old towels. The first, he tossed on the couch. "Mop that up, will you? I'll clean it in a few. Carpet first." He knelt down and started to spray the spots with the cleaner.

Kyo huffed and shook his head. "You should've seen her face the first time I came off stage bleeding with a massive boner." He grabbed the towel and started on the couch, making sure to dry everywhere the pee had run. 

Die glanced up at him, smirking a bit and then wincing a little. "Yeah.... well... you should have seen mine." He started in on the first spot, scrubbing while the room started to smell like lavender. "Just... saying... but do you know how it feels to see the person you've got it pretty bad for all riled up and obviously hard, and yet bleeding at the same time? It's not a mixture you're exactly prepared for the first few times."

Kyo laughed softly, standing up to get some leather wipes he kept around for spills. "I... can imagine." He paused in his actions, grinning at Die. "Sorry for any inconvenience I might have caused then." 

Die snorted. "My dick was like YES PLEASE and my brain was like oh god what has he done?! Those reactions together are quite interesting to say the least." He paused and glanced up at him. "You know I tried scratching myself while jerking off once, just to see how you felt... and that did not end well."  
‘  
"Well, I've had a few of those mixed reactions myself like 'Oh God this feels great' and 'oh God I think I need stitches now'.” He looked back at Die, raising an eyebrow. "Why not?" 

He made a face. "I did not enjoy scratching myself to say the least. I don't mind when you claw at my back during sex, but doing it myself was no good at all."

Kyo shrugged and went back to wiping down the couch, sighing as it started smelling like leather again. "I'll keep that in mind... although, if you told me I couldn't claw your back, we'd have to have sex with me in shackles from now on."

"Even been jerking off and do something that just doesn't agree with you and just lose your boner completely?" Die nodded slightly. "That." At the second part, he smirked. "Shackles don’t sound so bad to me."

Kyo laughed. "I have actually... it sucked because I was pretty turned on and then just deflated like a balloon." He moved to toss the wipes in the trash and towel in the laundry before coming back out. "Psh... you would love me in shackles wouldn't you? Completely at your mercy..." He licked his lips, actually liking the sound of that a bit. 

Die glanced up at him and laughed softly. "I think you like the sound of it, too." He had moved on to the next big puddle, scrubbing at it. "Definitely gonna need a shower after this. And we're throwing this towel away... damn."

Kyo nodded and squatted down to help Die, having grabbed another towel. "It’s okay baby, they make more..." He looked over the mess and bit his lip slightly. "Uhm... did you ever consider... puppy pads or something?"

Die's eyes flicked up to him and he let out a laugh. "Honestly, I hadn't ever considered just pissing on the fucking floor like I was two years old. I blame this one on you for everything but that first accidental spurt." He smirked to allow him to know he was fooling around.

Kyo laughed and leaned over to place a kiss to Die's shoulder, shrugging. "I just found it so hot to watch you really let yourself go there...."

Die chuckled. "Mmm... admittedly it was fun. But not fun enough to repeat it and suffer the consequences." He moved to the next puddle and started scrubbing, glad this was the last big one.

Kyo wrinkled his nose and nodded, getting the spray and covering the area that needed it. "Eh, I have to agree. I'm definitely not fond of the clean up."

"Mmm... however... your balcony is free game, just sayin'." Die glanced back at him. "And any tile area." 

Kyo glanced towards the balcony and grinned. "Mm true, true... maybe we should redo the whole place in tile." He laughed. 

"Nah... I will just refrain from doing... this... again." Die chuckled and finished up on that spot, doing the quick wiping up of the last few small places and then settling back. "Okay... that's clean, now toss the towels, wash the clothing, and pretend I never did this." He snorted and got up.

Kyo snorted as well and stuffed the towel he had in the trash, shrugging a bit as he stripped out of his own clothes to put them in the wash. "Nope, you never did this and I never got off on it. In fact, I'm not even home yet and you're dreaming." 

"Good... good... that I can agree to." Die took the rest of his clothing off and emptied pockets, taking off chains and whatnot and then shoving everything into the wash and turning it on.

Kyo reached out and pinched Die's naked butt, chuckling softly. "So... bath time." 

"Sounds like something necessary to me." He smirked a little and rubbed his hand through his hair slightly, huffing a bit.

Kyo nodded and made his way to the bathroom, assuming Die would follow him. He went about getting the water temperature just right before getting underneath the spray, letting out a sigh. "Mmm, definitely necessary." He had, after all, had quite a long day. 

Die plodded after him, his feet making a soft slapping sound on the floor under him. He huffed out a sigh and moved to get in the shower with the other, looking content as the spray started washing away his current shame.

Kyo chuckled softly and moved to let Die get the spray, slipping his arms around him once most of the mess was gone. "You're gorgeous." 

The guitarist leaned into Kyo's touch and yawned a little, a lot taken out of him by that session. "Remind me to jerk off in conspicuous places more often when I want to have you fuck the shit out of me, yeah?"

Kyo hummed and nodded, nuzzling into Die's neck, placing light kisses here and there. "Sounds like a plan to me, baby... though I don't always promise to interrupt you. I might just watch." 

The guitarist chuckled. "Honestly, I don't mind. I want to watch you one day again... now that I'm not committing some huge sin by doing so."

Kyo grinned. "I'll keep that in mind... of course, you could always 'accidently' come back to the bus early while everyone else is at an after party." 

Die smirked a little. "Ahhh... so that's what you do in your spare time on the bus, huh? We get drunk and you beat off." He winked at him and then closed his eyes, allowing himself to envision it for a moment.

Kyo chuckled. "Well, sometimes... other times, I'm dead asleep before I can even find my bunk." 

"C'mon... everyone has time for at least one good squirt before they pass out. Especially with the raging hard-ons you leave the stage with, I doubt there's any issue at all with it taking a while." 

The vocalist glanced up at Die then laughed. "Okay, fine... a good 90% of the time, I jack off as soon as I'm alone."

Die chuckled. "That's what I thought." He winked as he finished up his shower and then stepped out, grabbing a towel from the rack. He dried off quickly and then padded off toward the bedroom, humming softly to himself.

Kyo just huffed out a laugh and followed suit, taking care of drying off then wandering after Die, finding him on the bed. He plopped down beside him and stretched out, giving a slight yawn.

Die reached over and patted his leg and then rolled over, glancing at the clock. "Would it be too lame to go to sleep now? I mean... we never sleep in and this would be the perfect opportunity."

Kyo hummed softly and curled up against Die's side. "Mmm, I think that would great actually..." His eyes were already closing as he tugged the covers up. 

Die tucked the covers in around them both and pushed one leg over the vocalist's, holding him as close as he could without being suffocating in his presence.

He chuckled softly and slipped his arm over Die's chest, letting his hand rest over his heart. "Love you." 

"I love you, too, baby," Die smiled to himself, glad those words could pass between them now, not just a one-sided declaration.

Kyo smiled and soon drifted off, truly feeling at peace with the way things were between them. It was...perfect. 

**To be continued**


	8. Chapter 8

Die stood in the midst of the crowd at the airport, feeling more than a bit stressed out. He'd gotten pretty much no sleep on the plane ride over and his stomach was feeling a little blah from the food on the plane. But at least they were on solid ground now, a bus presumably ready to pick them up as soon as they got had all picked up their luggage.

He glanced to his side and took in the sight of the other's standing in a little clump. He closed his eyes and reached to pinch the bridge of his nose as he heard the announcement that they were starting to unload their baggage and please be ready to claim it at carousel three. He opened his eyes and shuffled a few steps forward, waiting as he watched bags come thumping out onto the conveyor.

Kyo stood with his hands stuffed into the pocket of his hoodie, sunglasses obscuring his eyes and shoulders hunched up. The plane ride over had proved long and annoying, as he'd kept waking up at every little sound. It didn't help any that he couldn't use Die as a pillow and they had been pretty much separated for the last couple of weeks in preparation for the tour. 

Hearing the announcement that their baggage would be arriving soon, he moved closer to the thing and waited for it, glancing around and noticing that he was standing right next to Die. "You look ill." 

Die glanced over at him and then frowned a little, nodding. "Think the food made me a little miserable... plus no sleep. But, I'll be fine." He didn't really want the other to have to worry about him so much, so he just tried to look a bit less sickly while he was at it. He leaned forward, grabbing one of Kaoru's bags and pushing it off toward the other guitarist.

Kyo grunted in response, having passed up on the food as stress did nothing for his appetite. He spotted Toshiya's suitcase and grabbed it, handing it off to the bassist and receiving a murmured, "Thanks". After a few moments, Kaoru handed him his own luggage and he moved back to let the others get their own, watching the people in the airport. One girl was studying him very carefully and it made him want to hide behind something, not ready for the onslaught of fans just yet. 

Die finally saw his own bag, grabbing the huge grey hard-shell off the belt and putting it on the little baggage carrier before heading off toward the odd-sized package area and waiting on their guitar cases to come out. It took them a few minutes to come out and when he was sure they had them all, he headed out toward the curb area, hoping like hell the bus was there already and not a group of fans.

Kyo wheeled his own bag outside to the curb and was thankful to see their bus waiting as well as staff members who were taking care of the other equipment that had had to come with them. He made his way onto their home-away-from-home for the next few weeks, and put his bag on his bunk before plopping down in one of the seats, letting out a sigh. 

Die allowed the staff to take his cart and took only his carry-on onto the bus for the time being. Getting out of here was top priority. He quickly went and figured out where Kyo had left his bag, claiming the bunk below Kyo's as his own and then settling down on the edge of it, debating going to sleep, but not so sure about it.

Kyo glanced up when Die got on the bus then looked out the window, seeing Toshiya and Shinya chatting with staff and Kaoru overseeing the loading of equipment just outside. He moved to where Die had sat down and settled down, leaning his head on his shoulder. "I wonder if they'd notice if we went to sleep at the same time...." 

Die glanced over at him and gave him a soft smile. "I doubt it... I mean, they expect me to not sleep on the flights and they know you tend to want to sleep a lot on the bus, so... you know."

Kyo hummed softly and placed a kiss on Die's bicep before standing up and tugging the curtains closed on his own bunk before toeing off his shoes and sitting back down on Die's bunk, scooting in against the wall. "I kinda don't care if they do notice. They can suck it if they have a problem." 

Die watched Kyo as he took off his shoes and then went about getting comfortable in Die's own bunk. He laughed softly and took his boots off as well, putting them aside and then slipping into the bunk, pulling the curtain shut and tugging Kyo into his arms. He pushed his hand into the other's hair and held him still as he leaned in to claim the other's lips, having been wanting to do that for near two days now.

Kyo smiled against Die's lips and slipped an arm around his waist, returning the kiss eagerly. It had only been a day or so, but it had been too long for him since they'd last been able to just be together in any sort of intimate fashion.

Die broke the kiss after a few moments, shifting slightly to take off his chains and belt, depositing them outside the bunk along with his wallet and a few other items from his pockets. He moved to do the same for Kyo, brushing over his crotch with the back of his knuckles and smirking a little before he took his belt completely off and put it aside.

Kyo watched Die remove his accessories then smiled as his lover did the same for him. He was about to thank him when he felt the other's hand brush against him and he had to bite back a groan. "You did that on purpose.”

Die glanced up at him and smirked. "Of course I did. It's been too damn long again." He sighed softly and slid his arm around him again, nuzzling into his neck and just holding on. "Mmm... I think... I can finally manage to sleep again."

Kyo snorted and shook his head, grumbling a bit before bringing a hand up to stroke through Die's hair. "Yes, it has been too long. I haven't even been able to get in a quick solo session." He sighed and kissed the top of Die's head. "Me, too... maybe." 

Die smirked a little bit and then huffed slightly. "Yeah, I've been a bit dry in that department, too. It's... yeah... not so great." He shuffled a bit closer and then pressed a finger to Kyo's lips as he heard voices and the door opening and closing.

Kyo had opened his mouth to say something else, but silenced himself when he felt Die's finger against it. He heard other's walking around and bags being set down. Kaoru's voice ringing out through the bus, taking a head count of members, staff and stuff. 

Die winced at the head count being done, not wanting to be discovered right at the beginning while he could be potentially relaxing with his lover. So he simply offered, "I'm in my bunk!" while Kaoru was still near the front of the bus, nudging Kyo a little and hoping it wouldn't sound like they were in there together.

Kyo followed Die's example, shifting a bit to yell towards the top of the bunk. "Sleeping!" He lay back down and listened as Kaoru carried on with whatever. With a grin, he kissed Die softly, whispering. "That worked..." 

Die smirked a little, nodding, burrowing himself back into the other's neck and closing his eyes, more exhausted than horny for the time being. Later, he'd have that taken care of... or so he hoped.

Kyo yawned and closed his eyes, brushing his fingers through Die's hair before falling asleep, not even noticing the bus moving and carrying them towards their first stop of the tour. 

Hours later, Die finally woke up to an aching bladder and the pang of hunger in his stomach. He licked his lips a little and nuzzled into Kyo a little more, unsure how long they'd been asleep or where they were or even what time it was.

Kyo let out a grumble and rolled over, cracking an eye open. "S'time to leave yet?"

Die nuzzled into him a bit and shook his head, whispering, "I don't think so. But... I sort of need to get up... and you're on my arm."

Kyo huffed slightly and moved, sitting up a bit. "I gotta piss, too, lemme know if the coast is clear... and where the hell we are for that matter." 

Die nodded a little and quickly shifted out, slipping out of the bunk and making his way to the bathroom, leaving the curtain drawn on his bunk. He took his much-needed piss and washed his hands before heading back and seeing no one was looking, he poked his head into the bunk. "Your turn." With that, he sauntered off down the aisle to go ask someone if they knew where they were.

Kyo slipped out of the bunk after Die had come back and went to take care of his business, rinsing his hands and then his face, combing his fingers through his hair. He patted his face dry then sat back on the edge of Die's bunk, promptly dozing back off without meaning to.

Die found out that no one knew where they were and he didn't want to bug the bus driver, so he just went back to the other, smirking a bit when he saw Kyo was dozing on the side of the bunk. He gently reached to poke him. "Kyo... lay down."

Kyo blinked his eyes open again and huffed. "I'm awake. What time is it and did anyone stock the fridge?" 

"It's late, like almost midnight, and I have no idea on that one." He leaned against the side of the bunks and smirked down at him.

Kyo hummed then looked up a Die, licking his lips and running a hand up the other's thigh, dipping inward then pulling away. "Gonna go find out..." He stood up, making sure to brush against Die as he wandered out to where the mini-fridge was, looking in it and finding some bottled water. He grabbed two bottles and made his way back to Die, offering him one. "Most everyone is asleep..."

Die glanced at him and then took the bottle of water. "Some food would be marvelous. My stomach is calm now and adding water is probably not going to work out so well." He sighed softly and then gestured Kyo toward the front so they wouldn’t disturb their sleeping bandmates and staff. 

Kyo nodded and moved back to the front, plopping down on the couch and looking out the window, seeing city lights in the distance. "I could go for fast food right now. Too bad this thing can't hit a drive-thru."

Die chuckled. "I think I could navigate it if you wanted me to. Go inside and try ordering us something. If they have pictures, even better."

Kyo laughed. "I think I can get my point across." He scrunched up his face and spoke in English. "I want hambahgah." He wrinkled his nose and looked at Die. "I dunno... it'd be hard to get out the condiments though." 

Die almost wanted to start laughing at Kyo's try on English, but he didn't dare. That'd just be cruel and he wasn't a cruel person. He smirked a little and reached to pat his hand. "Just tell me what you want and I'll convince the driver to stop and I'll go get it."

Kyo huffed softly and leaned into Die for a moment. "Okay, I want a hamburger with mayo and fries. Wonder if we should wake the others up... or just get them something for later." 

"I'll just get them something for later. No point in interrupting much needed sleep for something I can guess on." The guitarist shrugged a little.

Kyo nodded and stretched out, letting his hand drift over Die's thigh with a smirk. No one was awake to see them at the moment so he was feeling a little bold with his touches. 

Die shifted a little closer to him and reached over to cup his cheek, pulling him close and kissing him ever so gently on the lips. He pressed his nose to the other's and smiled softly as he nuzzled him a bit. "It's so nice... to have someone close to me while we're away. It's a huge comfort."

Kyo smiled softly and nuzzled their noses together, placing a light kiss to Die's lips. "I agree... it will be so wonderful to have you to go to after shows. I normally feel so isolated because I can't communicate how I feel or what I need in those moments."

Die lightly kissed him again and then offered softly, "I wish you'd known I would have done anything for you... all these years." He kissed him one more time and then shifted away. "I'll go tell the driver to stop at the first burger place... we're almost in town."

Kyo frowned a little, sighing softly. "I wish I had known too...so bad." When Die got off the bus, he watched him go, smiling at the thought that the other was doing this for him. 

Die padded off to the front and conversed with the driver shortly, going to get his wallet and then coming back, waiting until they were at the place, parked just off the street. Die left the bus and went to get food. He came back with three huge bags and a portable container with six drinks in it. He gave one to the driver and then settled into his seat next to Kyo, pulling out the other's order as well as his own.

Once Die came back with their food, Kyo gladly took his and dug in. "Thanks baby...so good...."

Die pulled out a bag of onion rings and a chicken sandwich for himself, the thing loaded with tomato and lettuce, just the way he liked it. He nodded a little at Kyo and then slumped back, starting to much on his food, a content look on his face.

Kyo smiled around a bit of burger, swallowing then taking one of Die's onion rings with a smirk. To him, this was one of those simple moments of happiness that he couldn't really explain but it was nice and he found himself smiling as he continued with his meal. "You're the best."

Die, in return, stole a few fries and then opened a few ketchup packets, dumping them on his sandwich wrapper and swiping his onion ring through it before crunching into it, getting crumbs all over his shirt in the process.

Kyo chuckled softly at Die's mess, reaching over to swipe the crumbs off his chest. He dipped a few fries in the ketchup and ate them before going back to his burger, finishing it off in another couple of bites. He wiped his mouth then sat back with his smile still in place. 

Die looked down as the other swiped the crumbs off, shrugging a little and giving him a sheepish look. He went back to eating his chicken sandwich, making please noises every few bites, something he was apparently unaware of doing.

The vocalist turned to look at Die as he made noises, grinning. "Good sandwich, babe?" 

Die glanced up at him and blinked before it slowly dawned on him that his vocal chords had been producing sounds. He flushed and swallowed the bite in his mouth, offering a small, "Uh... yeah." He made a mental note to pay more attention to what he was doing when he sat down to eat from then on.

Kyo just laughed and glanced around before leaning over to place a quick kiss to Die's cheek. He finished up his fries and balled up the wrappers then stood to toss them in the trash can. 

Die took a few more minutes to finish up his food, concentrating on being quiet and not making his noises when he ate. Finally, he was done as well, taking a huge drink of his soda and then wiping up the crumbs on the table, tossing his garbage in one of the empty bags and settling back with his soda. "First fast food in a while."

Kyo moved to sit back down next to Die, sipping his own soda and nodding. "Yeah. It was good." He set his drink down and started fidgeting with the edge of his shirt, yawning. 

"You still tired?" Die asked, lightly bumping his knee with the other man's own, a little smirk on his lips.

"Kinda. Jet lag and all." He glanced over at Die, letting his knee brush against the other's. "Too wound up to sleep though, I think."

Die's head hit the back of the seat and he lolled it over to the other to peer at him. "Think we can get away with something quick?"

Kyo licked his lips, tugging at his shirt some more. "Maybe? I mean, I know we've all jacked off on the buses before..."

Die pursed his lips a little and then murmured, "I bet we could get by with it right here if I get my laptop and we put on porn. No one would think anything of it more than us both being hard-up for it."

Kyo considered it for a moment then nodded, rubbing his hand over his thigh, already antsy for it. "That might work..."

Die slipped out of the booth and went to put the food on the counter next to the sink so no one would accuse them of contaminating it. He then grabbed his bag and pulled out his laptop, setting it up and plugging it into one of the outlets, settling down again and starting it up, fingers drumming impatiently on the counter as it booted up.

Kyo watched Die get his computer then shifted over when he set it down, reaching down to quietly undo his belt in anticipation. 

Die smirked at him as he finally logged in and then pulled up a folder of videos that were already on his computer, no need for an internet connection. He gestured to Kyo to pick one, not wanting to embarrass himself with some of the content, making sure the volume was most of the way down, and then fully relinquishing control to the other.

Kyo leaned over to look at the videos, studying them for a moment before picking one that looked relatively normal, two guys giving each other blow jobs. 

Die watched as it started up and then as quietly as he could, he unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, slipping his hand in and starting to massage at his still-flaccid length, urging himself into hardness. The idea of doing this with Kyo bounced around in his mind, arousing him further than the video would have done by itself.

Kyo watched the video for a moment then turned to watch Die, licking his lips slightly. He soon followed suit and undid his own pants, snaking a hand in to brush over himself, letting out a soft sigh. 

Die was watching Kyo from the side of his vision, trying to be inconspicuous about it. He grunted as the blonde boy in the video started going down on the other one, sucking dick in an enthusiastic manner. He shifted his underwear aside and pulled his dick free of his pants, palming it completely and starting to jerk off slowly.

Kyo became slightly enthralled with the movie, ideas for him and Die floating through his head as he pushed his hips up into his hand. After another moment, he glanced over to Die and smirked slightly, slipping his free hand along the other's leg before going about freeing himself from his pants, stroking his hand over the length of his cock with a soft groan.

Die grunted faintly due to the hand on his leg, enjoying the touch for what it was. His free hand went to rest on Kyo's thigh as well, just lightly gripping the toned limb beneath as he sped up his strokes a little bit, his heart starting to beat rapidly in his chest.

Kyo shifted and pressed into Die's touch, losing focus on the video and just concentrating on his dick. He picked up the pace a bit, his other hand flexing on Die's thigh, his lip pulled between his teeth as his hips jerked a bit. 

Die glanced to the side again, watching Kyo for a long few moments before he looked back at the screen. He was close, so very fucking close. His hips arched up, his hand moving even quicker on his dick. "Shit," he hissed out, feeling a mild bit of panic settle over him as he realized he was going to get this all over his pants. He slowed down, a bit agonized to do so, but glanced around, finally finding the tissue box he knew had to be there somewhere. Nora never let them down on that one. He snatched it up and yanked out a few, decorating his lap with them quickly and then glancing back up at the screen, a gasp leaving his lips as he caught sight of Toshiya pawing through the food bag.

Kyo was watching Die with some amount of fascination as the other had a mini panic attack about tissues, chuckling softly before his head snapped up and he spotted Toshiya. His hand froze on his dick and he glanced at Die, mouthing, "Fuck". 

Toshiya glanced back at them and then murmured, "Don't let me stop you, I'm just hungry." He went back to sifting through the bag, making happy noises when he found his breaded chicken sandwich he always liked. "You remembered! Thank you!" He grabbed his fries and soda and went closer to the front of the bus to plop down and eat. 

Die glanced at Kyo and then shrugged, starting to stroke himself again, not at all put off by it since the other hadn't reacted badly.

Kyo flushed slightly, watching Toshiya get his food then go to sit down. He was debating on stopping, but decided to fuck it and went back to his dick, his strokes built to get him off quickly now instead of taking his time. 

Die huffed out a soft moan, his hips arching as he jerked himself off rather quickly, his hand not but a blur on his dick, years of playing the guitar making him faster than the average person with it. As he started to cum, he released a small grunt, his cum spurting out a bit wildly over his tissue-covered lap, some on his hand, and some on the table.

Kyo groaned lowly as Die began cum. He watched as long as he could, but ended up squeezing his eyes shut as he got more into it, images of him and Die together fueling him on until he lost it with a low groan, not caring that most of it spurted onto his shirt. 

Die let out a low little grunt as he watched Kyo lose it all over his shirt. He wished like hell that could have been his mouth, but he didn't say anything. Rather, he just started cleaning himself up and then tossed the tissues into the bag of trash he'd had going. He offered Kyo some tissues and closed out of the porn with his other hand.

Kyo sighed softly and slumped back for a minute before taking the offered tissues and mopped up what he could, wrinkling his nose a bit at the feeling of it soaking through his shirt. He huffed a bit and tucked his dick away then pulled his shirt over his head, careful to not get the mess in his hair. 

Die watched quietly for a few minutes and then closed his laptop, putting his dick away and doing his pants back up. "Do you think Toshiya noticed we were... uh... not watching the screen at that point?" He gave a little innocent face.

Kyo bit his lip and shrugged slightly. "I'm not sure. He hardly looked at us, more interested in his food." He hoped that was the case anyway, as he wasn't ready to explain things to Toshiya right then. 

Die nodded a little. "Let's hope..." He wasn’t all that interested in explaining anything right then either. In fact, he just was relieved he'd even orgasmed, given how long it'd been for him.

Kyo sat there for a moment before he shivered and realized how cold he was without his shirt on. Glancing towards the front where Toshiya had gone and seeing that the bassist had passed out again, he took his chances and leaned over to kiss Die quickly on the lips. He smiled softly then scooted from the booth to change out of his jeans into his track pants and another t-shirt.

Die smiled at him as he watched him go, just content to be where he was for the time being. He'd bother to move in a minute, once the post-orgasm bliss had faded out. But he knew he could ride that for a while and he was going to do exactly that.

Kyo changed quickly and wandered back out where Die was, sitting back down and yawning widely. He was tired and would have to go back to sleep soon if he had any hope of keeping a proper schedule during this tour. "You're incredibly sexy in your post-orgasmic bliss..."

Die glanced over at the other and smiled softly, his eyes a bit unfocused for the time being. He chuckled. "Thank you."

Kyo grinned then grabbed his soda, taking a drink and finishing it off then tossing it in the trash. "Wonder how late we can sleep in tomorrow..." 

Die shrugged a little. "Not sure. But we should probably get back to sleep... just a guess."

Kyo hummed and nodded, standing up and stretching again before making a face. "Guess I should go to my own bunk...." 

Die slipped up from where he'd been sitting, pulling Kyo in for a brief hug, kissing him on the cheek. "Might be more conducive to not cramping up." But that also meant he'd lay awake forever, but Kyo didn't know that and he was pretty determined he wouldn't find out.

Kyo hugged Die back, nuzzling into him for a few seconds. "Perhaps so..." He let out a sigh then shrugged and headed back towards the bunk area, climbing into his own and laying down. It was going to be a long few weeks, that was for sure... unless they came out to the rest of the band.

Die watched Kyo go and then glanced back at Toshiya before heading to the bunks himself, slipping into his own and settling down, just hoping sleep would come at some point.

Kyo lay there for a while, listening to the sounds of the bus and the others sleeping. He rolled over a few times then finally pulled out his phone, shooting off a text to Die's. /"Can't sleep..."/

Die heard his phone buzz, picking it up from the floor and inspecting it. He sighed softly and returned the text. /"Me either... just glad I'm not the only one."/

Kyo read the text and huffed slightly. /"Sucks... hard to sleep without a warm body next to me."/

At Kyo's confession, Die breathed out a sigh of relief. /"I know. I've gotten so used to you... I've slept so well while you're there, but I can't when you're not."/ He sent a second one quickly after. /"Come down here."/

Kyo read Die's next text and was about to reply when he saw the next one and smiled slightly. Quietly shifting out of his bunk, he slipped into Die's. "Couldn't stand it...?" 

Die looked up when Kyo appeared, putting his phone away in his pocket and then scooting over for the other. He held out his arms and pulled him close, nuzzling into his neck. "I couldn't."

Kyo smiled softly and happily moved into Die's arms, threading his fingers through his hair. "We might as well hold a meeting tomorrow or something and just admit to them that we're together."

Die sighed softly and then nodded a little. "I think so. This isn't going to work trying to hide it. I need to be around you too much," he whispered out against Kyo's neck.

Kyo nodded, turning his head to kiss Die's temple. "I feel the same...and it would be odd for us to just suddenly start... hanging out all the time."

"True enough... I mean some things they wouldn't ever suspect, but given your uh... awake-status, I'm sure they'd think something was up." He flushed a little.

Kyo chuckled and ducked his head a bit. "Yeah, I'm sure... generally everyone steers clear of me and my... wakefulness... so why would you suddenly be following me to whatever dark corner I find?"

Die shifted his head a little, nuzzling under Kyo's neck, not caring that he was being overly affectionate right then. He was entitled given their absence from one another for a while beforehand.

Kyo didn't mind Die's affections in the least, smiling in the darkness and stroking the other's hair. It was nice, really nice to be so connected with someone like this, especially since they were so far from home. 

Die leaned into the other's touch and closed his eyes, basking in the touch and just allowing it to happen, already feeling a hell of a lot closer to sleep than he had before.

Kyo let out a soft sigh and shifted, getting more comfortable, his eyes sliding shut as his hand moved a bit to rub over the back of Die's neck.

Within minutes, Die was out like a light, his breathing deep and relaxed, his body limp, half on Kyo and half off.

It didn't take Kyo much longer to fall asleep himself, happily clinging to Die and completely comfortable despite the small confines of the bunk. 

**To Be Continued...**


	9. Chapter 9

A few days has passed by since the pair had fallen asleep in the same bunk, neither of them discovered by anyone. And Toshiya had never mentioned a thing about their little escapade with the porn out front, so Die was fairly certain the other hadn't even noticed they'd been looking at one another rather than the screen when he'd come out.

The days in between had been rather uneventful, the shows going off without too many hitches and most everyone in a good - or at least operative - mood throughout. They'd stopped by a steakhouse for lunch and Shinya and his 42oz steak had been the highlight of the stop, something that amused the hell out of most of the crew and band alike.

They'd arrived at the venue ahead of schedule and Die had wandered off to the drug store down the street to get some beer and lube, along with a few condoms. He'd worn his hoodie in and paid in cash, keeping his head down so no one would question who he was. When he came back to the bus, it looked like he only had beer and nothing else, much to his benefit.

Around an hour later, he now stood stage left, his guitar in hand, participating in sound check rather actively in comparison to how he tended to some days.

Kyo, for his part, was in a foul mood. He'd woken up with a sore throat and his day had only gotten worse. He'd tripped getting out of the bus at one point and his exclamation of pain was overheard by a group of particularly annoying fans who all rushed towards him, causing him a good deal of panic until Nora thankfully showed up to fend them off. He'd gotten away with a quick wave then dashed into the venue. 

He was getting ready for the sound check when a tech came and informed him that there was a problem with his microphone and that they were working on it but he'd have to use a spare which irritated him and to make matters worse, he was getting a headache. 

With a sigh, he finally climbed on the stage to start his vocal warm-ups, wincing when his voice came out all wrong. This was not going to be a happy night for him. 

Die got through his sound check without so much as a single problem, glad that for once the cards were in his favor. He wasn't really paying attention to anyone else during the whole thing, only his own cues when they were given. He and Kaoru and Toshiya did their test together and then he was done, handing his guitar back to Kuroo and then plodding over toward Kaoru's side of the stage. Someone yelled his name from the rafters and he looked up, still walking forward, not even paying attention, his foot catching in Kyo's microphone cord. He went stumbling forward, the mic coming crashing from Kyo's hand onto the floor. 

After a few seconds of flailing around and almost falling, Toshiya caught Die around the middle and righted him with a sigh. "You're gonna die, man."

Die looked a bit confused and then looked toward Kyo, his eyes full of his regret for not paying attention. "Sorry, Kyo."

Kyo was in the middle of attempting another song, actually getting somewhere this time when his mic was ripped from his hands and crashed to the floor with a sound the pierced his ears painfully. His head snapped up and glared at the person responsible, his mind not really registering that it was Die. "Fuck! What the fucking hell?" With a growl, he detangled himself and stalked off, brushing roughly past Die and Toshiya. He was raging by the time he got back to the bus and almost knocked George over. He didn't stop to apologize though, instead just stalked onto the bus and into the back, slamming the door that separated the bunks from the rest of it. 

Die stood there, staring at Kyo's retreating back, his eyes wide with something that looked a lot like fear. His mouth moved, but no words came out. He just felt like he was completely and utterly back-handed, despite Kyo not having put a single hand on him. 

"Told ya, man." Toshiya sighed and patted him on the back. "Shoulda picked it up for him. Might have helped."

Die sighed and plodded off toward the back room, intent to just use some part of his beer before they even got to the meet and greet - which, he was one hundred percent certain Kyo was not going to be partaking in tonight.

Kyo's fit of anger had not helped his throat in the least and after about an hour of sulking in his bunk, he finally had to go find Nora to get some medicine and hot tea. He put on his hoodie and wandered back into the club, sighing as he spotted the ever growing line. It looked like it would be packed and somehow that just made his mood worse. He moved to the backstage area, skulking around until he eventually ran into Nora and told her what he needed then, as an afterthought, said that he would not attend the meet and greet. 

Nora didn't look too surprised, just rushing off to find what Kyo needed, all the while doing her other jobs. She somehow got Kaoru back to the bus, Toshiya's bag from the bus, and Kyo's medicine and tea from the store down the street. Kuroo made the hot water for Kyo's tea and they gave it to him before quickly leaving the room.

Die, on the other hand, sat in his own dressing room, nursing his fifth bottle of beer, knowing he'd be quiet and more than a little drunk during the meet and greet, but not really giving a rat's ass.  
Kyo managed to thank Nora and Kuroo for their help as he pretty much ignored Kaoru's presence as he sipped his tea and took a double dose of the medicine. 

Thoughts of the look on Die's face kept surfacing in his head and it made him less outwardly angry and more upset with himself, his mood dropping into a dark place. He'd have to apologize to his lover but they didn't have time now as it was nearing time for the meet and greet.

Soon enough, they were called to gather for the meet and greet and Die managed to put on his cologne and pretend like he wasn't as drunk as he was. At least he knew he could play completely trashed, most of the songs known pretty much by repetitive motion now. He moved to stand behind Shinya, his head down and his nerves creeping up on him.

A few minutes later, they were hustled into the room and everyone was cheering. Die did his best to not look like a grumpy asshole, even though he felt like one. After a few more minutes, they had moved past the Q&A that he barely even heard and onto the handshaking and photos. He put on his hardcore face and kept it there, not saying much to anyone as they moved along.

Kyo was busy drowning in his own despair when a staff member came to tell him the M&G was almost over and since they didn't have an opener for this show that it would be time to go on soon. He thanked him and went to finish up his outfit which only consisted of stripping out of his shirt and slipping his jacket on instead, zipping it up about halfway. 

After he was presentable, he made his way inside and towards the area they would be entering from, peeking out to survey the group at the meet and greet. His eyes fell on Die and more guilt wrenched his gut. The guitarist was unhappy and wobbling a bit which meant he was probably drunk.

He sighed and found a dark corner to sit in while he waited on the rest of the band to finish up, keeping his hood pulled low and sunglasses on, never mind that he could barely see the floor with them.   
Die ended up having to be at least a bit sociable with one of the fans, a rather shy girl who brought him a hand-woven bracelet and gave it to him directly, not even in a bag. He thanked her and did his best to smile in the photo, though he was glad his sunglasses were on because he knew his smile never met his eyes.

For one of the first times in his life, he was glad when it was all over, not usually feeling that way about meet and greets. He went to go take a leak and then grabbed another beer to hand it to Nora to put on the stage. She took it without a word, apparently having been warned he was in a mood since she normally argued with him a little and didn't say a word today.

By the time the meet and greet finished up and the rest of the band moved to get ready to get on stage, Kyo was so deep into himself that he barely noticed them gathering nearby. Kaoru called him over for a pre-show chat/pep-talk that he had no interest in and just mumbled a couple of time as he kept stealing glances at Die. 

Finally, the lights dimmed and it was time to go on stage. Kyo prayed quietly to whatever deity listening that his mic had been fixed and his throat didn't act up then followed his bandmates onto the stage.  
Die found that he was maybe slightly drunker than he'd thought as he took the stage, his head swimming slightly. He took note of the other's on stage and then finally the bottle of water on top of his amp, the beer beside it, both of them open and waiting on him. He put his guitar on and went to gulp down half the bottle of water, knowing passing out during the show was not an option in the least.

Kyo mounted his box and peered out over the crowd without really seeing them. The place was already too hot and he knew he wouldn't stay in his jacket past the first few songs.

The music started and he waited for his cue before jumping into the song with a growl, throwing himself into the energy of the moment. Fortunately, his throat didn't give him much trouble, the medicine seeming to have done its job. When the first Inward Scream came up, he shrugged out of his jacket, baring his chest to the crowd and pulling a few loud screams. He reached down into himself and threw out the emotions of the day in the form of animalistic growls and cries, thumping the microphone hard against his chest several times throughout the process. He was damn near shaking by the end of it and as the last echo tapered off, he brought his hand up and dragged his nails over his chest, raising welts but not breaking the skin. 

Die turned away during Kyo's inward scream, facing his amp, his face distorted in a mask of pain. He'd made his lover feel like this, he'd been the cause of his agony tonight, and that ripped him apart inside. It took every ounce of his strength to not slam his guitar down on stage and just leave. When he finally looked up from the floor, he caught Shinya staring at him, resting in such a way he could see Die, but not be seen by the crowd so he could watch. For a long moment, they kept their eyes locked, and he sighed softly, looking away and closing his eyes. Kyo's cries ended and Die let his hands go to his guitar, Shinya moving back to where he belonged on the drums. A few moments later, they launched into the next song and Die remained with his back to the crowd until he could suck it

up and look less like someone ran over his puppy dog right before the show. He turned around finally and did his best to resume some semblance of normality in his routines with the crowd.

As the show went on, Kyo caught Kaoru looking at him a few times with a look that said he knew something was up. He ignored it though and focused on singing. He was doing fine in that respect until near the end of a song and his voice broke horribly and painfully. He growled in frustration and launched into another fit of cries and inhuman sounds, thankful it was time for the encore because at the end of it, he threw the microphone down and stalked off stage without so much as looking at the crowd or the rest of the band. 

It was all he had to not just keep walking straight out of the venue. 

Die exited the stage faster than normal, his beer bottle clasped in his hand. He stalked off to his dressing room and drained the rest of the bottle, throwing it against in the wall with a scream of something that actually wasn't anger. He just didn't know how else to get out his horrible emotions without crying like a fucking sissy. And going back on stage with puffy eyes seemed like a horrible plan. He stalked to the bathroom and threw some water on his face before coming back and waiting next to the entrance back to the stage.

Kyo heard the bottle break and Die scream as he'd been right outside the door of the dressing room when it'd happened. He clenched his fists to keep from screaming himself and ended up punching the nearest thing he could, which unfortunately ended up being a metal sign on the wall. With a hoarse curse, he looked at his now bleeding hand and sighed. At least the pain rush had relieved some of his tension but it was nowhere near enough. 

After hunting down more meds and a quick shot of whiskey - which had Nora shaking her head at him - he made his way back to the stage, just in time to go on again. He threw himself into the rest of their set, wincing as his voice got worse and worse.

Die actually ended up on stage last, which wasn't at all usual for him. He passed all the other's by and grabbed up his guitar, putting it on barely in time to get in on his part of the song at the right time. He felt like he was on edge the entire time, messing more than one thing up during the encore. By the end, he shoved his guitar at Kuroo and snatched up a handful of picks, tossing about ten out to the crowd in less than a minute. He threw out his water and then the bottle and the cap, feeling like throwing something more valuable in his fit of rage, but knowing he'd regret it.

He waved and headed off stage, leaving before almost everyone else, something else horribly unusual for him. He stalked off to his dressing room, slamming the door behind himself and dropping down on the couch in the dark, burying his face in his hands, allowing himself what he hadn't before, his shoulders shaking a little with his emotional overload.

Kyo forced himself to wave to the crowd before disappearing off stage and finding the closest empty, dark room. He stepped in and didn't bother with the light before letting out cry of frustration, anger and despair. He'd hurt Die and he hated himself for it. He kicked out and his foot connected with what had to be a couch and he grunted in pain. "Fuck!" 

In another fit of rage, he resorted to his old standby of relief and brought his hand up to his chest, nails digging into the flesh as he scratched them across already scarred skin. He could feel the blood welling up and spilling out and somehow it numbed him, if only briefly. He finally let it wash over him and he slid to the floor of the room, closing his eyes and mind to the world.

It took Die a few good minutes before he collected himself even a little bit. He sighed softly, wiping his eyes and locating his glasses in the dark, putting them on and then grabbing his bag. He went to the door and flipped on the light, glancing around to see if he left anything. After a few moments, he sighed and turned the lights off, departing the room and heading for the bus, his head bowed.

Kyo didn't realize he'd passed out until he was being shaken awake by a concerned looking Nora. She didn't say anything though and just handed him a few wet wipes. It took him a few moments to realize what for and he winced as he glanced down at his chest. With a sigh, he cleaned himself up a bit then took his jacket from her with a muttered 'thanks' before standing and following her from the room to the bus. 

Once there, he made his way straight to his bunk, ignoring Kaoru and Shinya as they attempted to ask him what was up. He tugged on a t-shirt then climbed into the bunk, shutting the curtain before flopping back with a sigh, once again sinking into his own dark thoughts and wishing like hell he could take today and redo it. 

Die made it to the bus and found Kuroo, giving the other instructions to give one of the venue staff a little something extra to clean up the broken bottle in his dressing room. Right after, he headed onto the bus and went straight to his bunk, throwing his bag on the floor and scrambling into his bunk, rolling over toward the wall and allowing himself to wallow in his own stew of emotions once again.

Kyo heard Die get into his bunk and desperately wanted to crawl down there and apologize and beg for forgiveness. It wouldn't work though right now and suddenly he just desperately needed to get out of there. He slipped out of his bunk and dressed himself in jeans, a tank top and a dark hoodie before grabbing his wallet and heading to the front of the bus, informing the first person he saw, which happened to be Kuroo, that he was going for a walk and he'd be back later. He headed off in a random direction, walking for a while before he realized that he was surround by shops. Paying closer attention to his surroundings, he came across a gift shop.

On a whim, he stepped into it and began looking around, stopping at a display of stuffed animals. One in particular caught his eye, a little beanie red panda. It made him think of Die and he picked it up, deciding to buy it for his lover. It wouldn't do for an apology but maybe it'd help a little. After walking around a bit more, he went to the counter to purchase the panda, having a bit of trouble with the money amounts until the kind woman at the register helped him with it. Flushing a bit, he thanked her and headed back out onto the street, intending to head back to the bus before realizing he was hopelessly lost. 

Die lay there in the darkness of his bunk for the longest time, finally getting it all out of his system. This was stupid. All he'd done was accidentally trip over a microphone cord and Kyo had gone off on him. He should have just been angry for a little bit, not so irrationally hot-headed about it. But then... this was Kyo, not just any old person, and Die had known he was getting into a hot ball of trouble with the other to start with. But the fact that he'd caused the issue made it that much worse now that he was in a relationship with him.

After a while of hearing nothing, he finally mopped up his eyes and blew his nose as quietly as possible before getting out of the bunk and seeing if they were still at the venue. When he was told they were, he got back off the bus, sunglasses still in place and headed to the venue shower, his change-bag in tow.

After wandering around a bit, Kyo sighed and gave up trying to find his way back to the bus. He would've looked up the venue but he honestly had no clue what the name of it was, having not paid attention. With another sigh, he pulled out his phone to call Nora, frowning when she didn't answer. He debated for a moment then tried Kaoru, not getting an answer there either. He stood there for several moments and finally let out a huff before he texted Die's phone. _"I'm lost."_ It was a shitty thing to do, given their current circumstance , but it was getting late and he had no interest in being found by fans while alone.

Die had just finished stripping off the moment his phone went off. He frowned a bit as he looked at it, finding it was Kyo and he was lost. He typed in the name of the venue and the address, pretty anal about remembering such things, and then tossed his phone on the pile of clothing, grabbing his kit for the shower and stepping into the cubicle, drawing the curtain and turning on the water.

Kyo stared at the text for a few minutes, noting that Die had said nothing at all to him other than the address. He sighed and shook his head. What had he been expecting? He'd been an asshole and he knew it. Shaking his head, he put the address into a map app and headed in the direction it told him to. 

Along the way, he came across a rather nice looking jewelry boutique and stepped inside. He ignored the nasty looks of the workers and went around the place, examining the pieces before coming across a lovely silver bracelet with rubies around it. He knew it would look perfect on Die and called the saleswoman over to purchase it, smirking a bit as he handed her his credit card, not having that much cash on him. 

After the purchase was made, he left and finally made his way back to the bus to store Die's gifts in his bunk for the moment then grabbed up his shower bag and headed inside to take care of that. 

Die took his time in the shower, letting the warm spray of the water lull him into a slightly less conscious state of being. He huffed slightly as he shifted and his back cracked a few times. He did one last rinse down and washed the conditioner from his hair before turning off the water. Slicking the water from his hair, he stepped out of the shower cubicle and pulled his towel from his bag, quickly going about drying off.

Kyo walked into the shower area just as Die was stepping out of the cubicle. He opened his mouth to say something, but closed it shook his head. He wasn't really sure where to start with an apology though he knew a big one was in order. Instead, he ended up hovering in the doorway, looking uncomfortable.

Die glanced up, seeing Kyo there and pursing his lips a little. He felt almost like he should hide his shame right then, not knowing how to react to the other's presence very well for the time being. He sighed a little and settled on drying off enough to put his boxers on and then his track pants.

He glanced over at the other again and then offered quietly, "Sorry I'm taking so long; didn't realize anyone needed it but me." He yanked his shirt over his head, his oldest Chrome Hearts tank, and then jammed his stuff back in his bag, phone going in his pocket. He made his way to the door and then slipped past Kyo. He paused in the hallway and then quietly offered, "For what it's worth... I'm sorry."

Kyo watched Die finish dressing then visibly winced when he apologized for taking so long. He bit his lip and frowned as the other pushed past him, his hand reaching out to touch him then pulling back when he spoke again. His heart dropped when Die once again said he was sorry and he just shook his head. "Die... I-" Fuck, why was he so bad at this? He mentally kicked himself and hung his head, staring hard at the tiles on the shower floor before taking a slightly shaky breath. "Don't... don't... apologize. It was...." He huffed out a breath before glancing up a Die with pain in his eyes. "I'm stupid."

Die paused, not sure he wanted to know what Kyo had to say, but listening nonetheless. He turned back slightly to look at him when he obviously came up at a loss for words. He could feel the pain stabbing in his chest, a familiar ache he'd experienced in the past, and he knew it was anxiety, a fear born of too many lost relationships over stupid shit.

Die gave a little shrug. "No... not stupid." He wanted to just go over and hug Kyo, to tell him it was alright, that he forgave him, if this was his apology. But without the words he needed to hear, he felt like he was somehow trapped in it all, his words stuck in his throat. He just gave him a sad little look before fishing out his sunglasses and slipping them back on to hide the obvious redness of his eyes. "I'll... see you on the bus, yeah?"

Kyo clenched his jaw as Die put his sunglasses on, obscuring his eyes like a barrier between them. He simply nodded and stepped in the shower area, shutting the door behind him and getting into the cubicle, turning the water on as hot as it would possibly go before finally breaking and letting out a sob of emotion, his throat protesting the strain. This was bad and he felt like he was drowning. He didn't know how to fix it. He didn't realize he just needed to actually apologize. 

Die made it about halfway to the bus before realizing he was probably putting a huge strain on Kyo. He slumped against the wall and pushed a hand through his still wet hair, his eyes closed and the frown on his face deepening. He felt like shit and he knew he was being stupid about this whole thing. If he just didn't give a shit, then maybe Kyo wouldn't. But... that also seemed unlikely.  
He sighed and opened his eyes just in time to see Toshiya stop in front of him. The bassist was wearing his flannel pajamas, making it obvious he'd already gone through the motions of his shower. He hand his hands jammed in his pockets and he looked grim. "Have you seen Kyo?"

Die nodded and gestured to the shower. "He took the shower after me. Sorry... have I made us late by taking a long shower?"

Toshiya shook his head. "No, it's fine. Just worried about him since he's been gone a bit and was so worked up tonight." He paused and then offered. "You look a bit... out of sorts yourself. Is... something going on?" He was delicate about how he put it, not pushing or prying, just wanting to know what was happening.

Die gave a tiny shrug. "Yeah... I guess I got too offended by what he said with the whole microphone thing. And he's upset now too... and I guess that's my fault."

Toshiya sighed and just plunged in head-first. "Look, I'm not blind. I know what's going on. Stop pussy-footing around with it. I just... Die, you know Kyo's a bit... fragile. You always took care of it in the past, but now... you're avoiding it rather than helping like you would have. Be his rock and suck it up."

Die winced a bit and shifted his bag off his shoulder, giving it to Toshiya. "Fine... but if he punches me in the fucking face, you're taking the blame." He gave him a slightly irritated look and then headed back down the hallway and into the shower room.

He stood there for a moment, just feeling stupid and then quietly, "Kyo?"

Kyo had been leaning against the shower wall, exhaustion having set it from the show but more so from his and Die's... fight? Was that what this was? Their first fight as a couple? He was rolling those thoughts around in his head when he heard Die speak up; jumping slightly as he'd not heard the door open. "Yeah?" He winced when it came out as a hoarse croak, coughing a bit to clear his throat.

Die moved to sit down on the bench next to Kyo's stuff, a frown on his face. He picked at his pants a little and then sighed softly, reaching to push his glasses up and rub over his eyes. "Finish up and come out, will you?"

Kyo snorted slightly as he realized he hadn't even washed. He took care of that quickly and finally turned the water off, grabbing his towel and slinging it around his waist before stepping out and looking at Die before finding a spot on the floor to stare at. 

Die watched the other come out of the stall, a deep sadness in his eyes as he saw those scratches there. He looked away, feeling choked up. "I... I did this to you, didn't I?"

Kyo looked up again when Die spoke then glanced down at his chest, flushing in shame and bringing his hand up to cover them as he looked away. After a few moments, he took a breath and shook his head, swallowing a bit thickly. "No... I did." He looked at the pain on Die's face and it killed him, he wanted to go over and wrap his arms around him. Instead, he dried off quickly and grabbed his boxers and shirt, pulling them on before speaking again. "I'm sorry." It came out very quietly, barely audible but he'd said it and it was the best he could do. He kept his eyes firmly on the ground as he stood there, braced for Die to tell him that that wasn't good enough or something. 

Die let out a quiet little sigh when the other told him he was sorry, standing up and quietly pulling Kyo into his arms. He pressed a kiss to the side of his head and just held him there for a long few moments, unwilling to let go, regardless of how it looked to anyone who might walk in. That didn't matter right then.

Kyo tensed when Die first hugged him then relaxed into his touch, bringing his own arms up to wrap around Die's waist, practically clinging to him as he buried his face into his chest. He couldn't believe he'd been so damn stupid over something so simple.

Die buried his nose in the other's hair, not caring that it was wet right then. He closed his eyes hard, keeping the few tears of relief at bay for the time being. After a few more moments, he murmured, "It's okay... I should have been paying attention to where I was going."

Kyo shook his head. "I shouldn't have snapped. I was having a really bad day and... I just... lost it." He coughed and sniffed a bit, his nerves feeling raw as he pulled Die a bit closer, trying to calm himself down. 

Die pressed a kiss to the side of his head again and then pushed a hand into his hair, rubbing in a soothing sort of manner. After a moment, he murmured, "I forgive you."

At Die's words, he finally lifted his head to look up at the guitarist, bringing a hand up to stroke over his cheek. "Thank you." He swallowed again then leaned up and pressed his lips to Die's, needing that intimate contact. 

Die relaxed into the other's touch, allowing the kiss and gently returning it as well. For the time being, he wasn't reacting in an aroused sort of manner, rather it was more one of relaxation and relief as he kissed him back, glad this was finally stopping. He'd had enough of being mad for the day.

Kyo sighed softly into the kiss, carrying it out a bit longer before pulling away again, giving Die a half smile. "Thanks for giving me directions earlier instead of telling me to go fuck myself or something. I'd have deserved it." 

Die shook his head. "Even if I was horribly mad at you, you wouldn't deserve being lost and ignored." He touched the other's cheek gently. "No one deserves that." He gestured at Kyo's bag. "We should probably get back to the bus."

Kyo hummed slightly, leaning into the touch for a moment before sighing. "Yeah, probably so. I'd hate to hold them up." He picked up the rest of his things and put them in his bag before pulling Die in for another quick kiss. "I love you."

Die hadn't been so relieved to hear those words since the first time Kyo had spoken them to him. He offered his best smile given how drained he was. "I love you, too."

Kyo smiled and squeezed Die's hand before letting go and heading out of the shower room, feeling drained but definitely happier than when he'd walked in there. 

Die trailed after him, feeling a little better, but not as good as he could have. In a way, he still blamed himself, and he still felt bad for throwing the fucking bottle around in the dressing room too. Usually he didn't let his temper get the better of him.

Kyo stopped before they stepped outside and looked at Die, his expression a bit odd. "What is it?" He felt the guitarist still had something on his mind and he wanted it all smoothed over before they had to face the rest of the band. No doubt the others had sensed the turbulence between them.

The guitarist huffed out a little sigh. "Honestly... I lost my temper earlier. In a pretty bad way." He stopped, bowing his head, feeling ashamed of his actions. "I guess it could have been worse, but... I'm afraid to ask what I'd have done if anyone had been in the room with me."

Kyo winced a little and reached out, squeezing Die's shoulder. "I... I'm sorry. You wouldn't have lost yours if I hadn't lost mine." Guilt crossed his face and he hung his head a bit, chewing his lip. He made a mental note to just stay locked in his bunk the next time he was having a bad day. 

Die shook his head a little and quietly pulled Kyo close, just hugging him for a moment. When he stepped back, he murmured, "So... who ruined your day before I got to it and gave it a finishing touch?"  
Kyo leaned into the hug, clinging to Die slightly before taking a breath and letting out a bitter laugh. "Honestly, myself. I woke up with a sore throat and it snowballed from there. Tripped in front of the fans, my microphone wasn't working and then..." He looked up at Die. "I hurt the only person in this world that probably could've soothed my ire in the first place." 

Die frowned a little. "In front of the fans? Really, really? That blows big ones." He reached to ruffle Kyo's wet hair. "Didn't hurt anything too bad?"

Kyo huffed and nodded, his cheeks heating a bit at the thought. "Yeah, right off the bus. I didn't hurt anything, but several of them came rushing towards me like a stampede." 

"Oh lord." He knew how the fans were with Kyo all the time. He didn't usually mind it happening to himself unless he was really hung over and trying to avoid them when it happened. Indeed, most of the time, he put himself out there so the fans had someone to converse with and be close to like normal people. He patted Kyo's shoulder. "No cameras?"

He winced. "I think I heard a couple of clicks. I'd look on the internet but I'm afraid to." It wasn't that he minded fans, but some of them were aggressive in a way that he couldn't deal with, especially when he felt he couldn't communicate properly with them. "It wouldn't have been so bad but I felt like an animal at the zoo or something at that point."

"Yeah... true enough." He glanced toward the bus, which was already running. "We should probably get on board." he sighed, not wanting to go back to the mobile trap, but he knew they had to.

Kyo glanced towards the bus and let out a sigh, nodding. "Yeah, I suppose so." He turned to Die and pulled him close again, hugging him tightly for a moment before letting go and moving towards the bus. 

As they reached it, Kaoru stepped from it and gave them both a suspicious look. "It's about time you two showed up, we're ready to go and have been for a while."

Kyo just muttered out an apology and stepped onto the bus, waving to the others then heading back for his bunk, definitely not in the mood to socialize.

Die looked up at Kaoru, thinking of just letting it all slide, but he didn't feel like he particularly wanted to. He paused by him and turned his head. "You know... there was nothing untoward going on. We were talking some things out that no one else needed to hear or be involved in." With that, he started up the bus steps.

Kaoru just glowered at Die, not saying anything more, but was obviously displeased as he slammed the door behind them then motioned to the driver to get going. Kyo, for his part, just ignored it as he made himself comfortable on Die's bunk, sitting there instead of climbing up to his own. 

Die headed down the aisle, tossing his bag in the back corner and then sighing softly. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head. This was getting to be annoying as shit. He came back to sit down next to Kyo and leaned toward him. "I think we should just tell them. Pretty damn sure Toshiya knows... Kaoru's being an ass... and if we just toss it out there, I think he'll chill a little."

Kyo looked up as Die walked in then let out a soft sigh, nodding his head a bit. "Yeah, I noticed Kaoru's attitude." He thought about it for a long moment, going over the issues that would arise if not everyone was pleased about it. After a few moments, he glanced up at Die. "Okay, we might as well. I'm a bit tired of hiding it anyway."

Die nodded and waited until Shinya drifted toward the others in the main area, gesturing Kyo with him as he stood up and went to lean against the counter directly in front of them all. "Hey... we have a bit of an announcement, which may or may not come as a surprise to some of you." He took note that Nora and Kuroo were at least paying attention as well, Rick looking a bit lost from closer to the front of the bus. "Kyo and I are seeing one another. It's been going on for a while now, but it's getting to be a pain in the ass to hide it from everyone. So... it's easier this way. Now you all know."

Kyo just stood there watching everyone's faces for a reaction and waiting on a shit storm. For his part, he was nervous as fuck about telling other people about his relationships in general, let alone one with a bandmate. 

Kaoru crossed his arms but didn't say anything, his expression unreadable. Shinya, however, simply smiled. "It’s about time you two got together. You've been dancing around each other for quite some time now..." 

Die looked relieved, noting Toshiya giving a thumb's up and Nora just smiling and ducking back into the back area. Kuroo, for his part, looked a bit confused, looking between the two of them and then finally, in a small voice, "I honestly didn't think you were uh... into that sort of thing, Kyo."

Kyo's expression was one of relief as no one jumped up and started screaming or anything. When Kuroo spoke up, he looked a bit perplexed then gave him a slight smile, shaking his head. "This seems to be... a special case." 

Kuroo's mouth formed a little 'o' and then he just nodded and went off after Nora, seeming to have been doing something with her. From the front of the bus, Rick spoke up in English. "Hey! Is anyone going to tell me what's going on?"

Die glanced at him and then laughed, shaking his head and running a hand through his hair a bit awkwardly. "Um... well..." he fought to find the right English words, "Me and Kyo are..." he held up two fingers and put them against one another, "together."

Rick looked a little surprised and then replied, "No shit."

Kyo caught the gist of what Die was telling Rick and ducked his head a bit, blushing. Rick looked shocked more than anything and he wondered what the American was thinking. 

Die replied, "No shit." He shrugged and then looked back around at the other's. "Okay, so that's out there. Now I don't have to hide it when I feel like sitting next to Kyo all the time." He offered a little sheepish look. "That was getting awkward as fuck."

Shinya chuckled and shook his head. "I don't think anyone would have noticed until you started fucking loudly or something." Kyo blushed a bit more that then let out a sigh. "Right, well, like Die said... now you know." He coughed and shrugged awkwardly. "I guess, it goes without saying that this should be kept... private." 

Die let out a laugh that quite possibly put Toshiya's to shame on level of awkward. He clapped a hand over his mouth until he could calm down and then snorted. "Yes, well... you know... that happens, too."

Toshiya snorted at Die's laugh then grinned. "Just clean up after yourselves." He shot a look at Kaoru, who had put his headphones in and was studying his computer. "Some people forget and leave their jizz in odd places." He laughed again, clapping a bit like a retarded seal.

Kyo just huffed and dragged his fingers through his hair, looking for all the world like he just wanted to crawl under the table. He had not been prepared to discuss his sex life with the rest of the band.

Die held up a finger. "I do not leave it for other people to find later on the bus." That part was necessary, given what he'd done in alleyways and bathrooms before. "No one else needs to touch my spunk." He glanced at Kyo and gave him a sympathetic look. Apparently he was far more open about this than Kyo was.

Toshiya just laughed again. "No way. That's why condoms are the best for jacking off while on tour! No muss, no fuss! Plus, you're always prepared for a quickie." His eyes sparkled with amusement. The bassist was having a good bit of fun with this, given how embarrassed Kyo looked. 

Kyo just let out a snort and shook his head. "That's also why we have wet wipes and shit. The staff aren't stupid..."

Die gestured to three different tissue boxes he could see within range. "And a fuck-ton of tissues. Wipe up the spunk so Nora doesn't have to. We're a bus full of men with a 'no girls but Nora allowed' policy. I think they expect us to be watching porn or jerking off every five minutes."

Toshiya leered a bit and laughed. "Nah, not every five minutes, just in the middle of the night." 

Kyo just rolled his eyes. "Some of us _should_ jerk off every five minutes..." he said this lowly with a glance to Kaoru who was currently going over some papers or something. 

Die let out a giggle that sounded more like he had just jizzed his pants. "Well... when you can't admit things to yourself, it's hard to get laid."

Toshiya looked a bit too interested in what Die had to say at this point, raising an eyebrow and leaning forward. "Oh? Know some secret I don't?"

Die glanced at him. "Well... er... let's say Kyo and I got a little too overzealous one night at work and he walked in on us... and didn't leave. But afterward, he got all mad and shit. Fucking weird-ass shit."

Kyo plopped down on one of the couches and shook his head. "It was bizarre... I mean, he was _pissed_." 

Toshiya coughed a bit and shook his head. "Weird... Kaoru's usually pretty laid back." He shot the other guitarist a look and frowned thoughtfully.

"Exactly," Die chimed in again. "He got up in my face and we almost got physical over it rather than just a screaming match."

Toshiya frowned a bit more, crossing his arms. "Wonder what bit his ass?" 

Kyo shrugged and glanced at Die then Toshiya. "He was jealous? Or just really hard-up?"

"No idea." Die shook his head a little. "In any case, I'm glad you guys are accepting of us. I sort of feared two more people hating us for it."

Toshiya laughed and reached out to pat Die's leg, which was the only part of him he could reach from where he was sitting. "Nah, it's cool. I just hope it all works out. It can be difficult, what with being on the road and stuff." 

Shinya nodded, smiling at them both. "But it's better than Die moping about because Kyo doesn't notice him." He smirked a little and went back to his magazine. 

Die's head turned abruptly to stare at Shinya. "God... was it that obvious?"

Shinya peered at Die over the top of his magazine. "Only when you were drunk and crying on my shoulder about it." 

Die looked taken aback and then flushed darkly. "Oh lord. Well... uh... shit." He pushed his hand through his still-damp hair. "Uh... sorry?"

Shinya shrugged and glanced at Toshiya. "No problem. Now I just have to worry about this one. So it's one less wet shoulder." This earned him a glare from their bassist which he ignored.

Kyo finally spoke up again, shaking his head. "Well, um, if we're all done with this fun stuff... I'm going to bed." He stood up and started making his way towards the bunks, feeling a bit overwhelmed suddenly. 

Die watched Kyo and he didn't want to seem too eager, but he didn't want to leave Kyo alone either. He wanted to fall asleep in his arms, to watch Kyo sleep next to him for a while as he drifted off... and damned if he hadn't told them all everything for a reason. He stood up and trudged off after Kyo, murmuring a soft goodnight to everyone else, including Rick, who waved back to him.

Kyo had already crawled into Die's bunk, making himself comfortable against the inside wall, waiting for the other to join him. He was pleased with everyone's reactions, even Kaoru's, though his was one of indifference it seemed. He knew their band leader wasn't pleased about the relationship but he didn't really know why and didn't care at that moment.

Die slipped into the bunk after removing his cell from his pocket and stepping out of his shoes. He settled in, laying down and stretching out as well as he could in the bunk. "American buses are supposedly built for American people... how the hell do they fit in here? I'm not even American-man-sized and I feel like if I were any taller, I'd be hunched over."

Kyo chuckled and stretched out, for once glad that he was short. "I don't know what the problem is; I'm not having any issues." 

"Mmmhmm... I'm sure you're not," Die commented, a smirk on his lips.

Kyo grinned and wriggled against Die, scooting until he was flush against him. "Mm, this is kind of nice. For once, the bunk doesn't feel like a cage." It was true, Kyo felt at ease despite the decidedly cramped quarters with the two of them in there. 

Die smiled, curling up next to him, adjusting until he was comfortable. "Glad to be of help." He leaned in and nuzzled him a little, just taking in the smell that was Kyo.

Kyo sighed and closed his eyes, placing a kiss to Die's shoulder before finally falling into a deep sleep, a peaceful look on his face. 

Die spent quite a while longer falling asleep, still fretting quietly over his and Kyo's fight, not having enjoyed it at all and thinking to himself that he needed to pay closer attention to Kyo's moods from then on unless he liked being violently angry. When he finally did fall asleep, it was almost an hour and a half after it was obvious Kyo had passed out and his sleep was restless, as it usually was when he was on the tour bus.

**To Be Continued...**


	10. Chapter 10

Hours later, Kyo finally dragged himself to wakefulness at the persistent fullness of his bladder. Grunting, he shook Die's shoulder. "Babe... gotta piss... bad." 

Die clawed his way through the sleepy veil of not having been asleep for nearly as long as Kyo had. He grunted softly, his brain trying to register the other's words. He made a little face and then murmured, "Huh?"

Kyo whined a little, getting desperate at this point. He shook Die a little harder than necessary, hissing. "I have to _piss_!"

Die gave Kyo a dopey little smile, blinking sleepily at him. "Oh? Mmm..." he smacked his lips a little and shifted slightly to push his morning wood lightly against the other's thigh. "Does that mean you want me to move?"

Kyo stared at Die incredulously then let out a low growl, pushing his thigh against Die's boner a bit roughly. "Please? I'll make it up to you when I get back... or hell, follow me in there. No one's awake at this hour." He squirmed a bit, reaching down to cup himself. 

Die grunted a little and then rolled out of bed, smoothly getting to his feet even though he was still groggy. He just leaned back against the divider between the sets of bunks and closed his eyes, yawning widely.

Kyo scrambled out of the bunk, thinking he was free until his foot got caught up in the blankets and he face planted at Die's feet, groaning as his bladder protested and he leaked a bit on his pants. With a wince, he rolled over and stood up, muttering out a cuss word as he stared down at the small wet patch there. "Fuck..."

Die opened one eye as Kyo flopped on the floor. The other eye opened and he arched one finely-plucked eyebrow at the smaller man. Once the other was up, Die immediately noticed the wet patch, a little thrill running through him as he purred out, "You better hurry."

Kyo practically hissed at Die as he hobbled his way to the onboard bathroom, barely getting his pants down in time to relieve the rest of the pressure on his bladder. 

Die remained where he was, closing his eyes once again and listening to the going's on in the bathroom. When he heard Kyo finishing up, he shifted to roll back into the bunk, quietly pushing his pants down and freeing his aching length, waiting to see how Kyo would react to it once he came back.

Kyo finished up after what seemed like forever, shaking off and flushing the toilet then rinsing his hands. With a sigh, he flicked off the light and made his way back to what he was starting to think of as _their_ bunk. He crawled in beside Die, flopping down, nad then noticing the other's bare erection. "Should've known..." 

Die at least had the grace to allow a blush to paint his cheeks. He sniffed a little and then shrugged. "At least thought you should know that this is at least half you." He pulled the elastic of his pants back up over his erection and then snuggled up to Kyo in such a way his cock was far from touching range, closing his eyes and snuggling down to try to sleep a while longer.

Kyo chuckled softly at Die's reaction before shifting and trapping Die with his leg, dipping his hand down to brush over the other's crotch. "I didn't say put it away." He gave Die's dick a light squeeze through the material of his pants then worked his hand under them, wrapping his fingers around his lover's length, a soft sound escaping his lips. 

Die let out a surprised little gasp, whimpering as the other pushed his hand into his pants. He shivered and then arched toward him. "Hnngggg!" That wasn't the most expected turn of events, but he wasn't going to argue with it either.

Kyo smirked, shifting so that he could place his lips right next to Die's ear, letting his breath ghost along the shell of it before whispering. "To know that _I_ caused this turns me on so fucking much." He moved his hand slowly, wanting this to last, his own cock quickly hardening. 

Die huffed out a soft breath against Kyo's neck, a little chuckle following it at Kyo's words. His tongue slicked out, wetting his lips and incidentally lightly flicking over Kyo's neck, wondering how the vocalist would react.

Kyo shuddered at the touch of Die's tongue on his neck, a soft groan escaping him. He moved his hand, swiping his thumb over the head of Die's cock, his own hips jerking a bit. 

Die's hands began to wander, sliding down Kyo's stomach and then over his cock, finding the little wet patch on his pants and drawing it between thumb and forefinger, rubbing it there before letting it go and palming the other's cock with a soft groan.

Kyo smirked slightly then bit back a moan as Die palmed him, not wanting to wake the whole bus with their activities. He pushed against Die's hand, burying his face against his neck, his own hand working a bit faster on Die's length. 

Die let out a soft little sound, hips jerking against the other's hand, slipping his own hand up and doing his best to push into the other's pants at the awkward sort of position he'd placed himself in.

Kyo squirmed against Die's hand, not getting the right angle after a moment and letting out a huff. He pulled his own hand free and held up a finger before shifting onto his knees as well as possible, his short stature making it easier in the tight space. He pushed his pants down, freeing his cock then moved so that he was near Die's head, lying down with his head resting on Die's thigh. 

Die watched Kyo shift around, wondering what he was doing. The new position made him smirk a bit as he reached out and started to stroke the other's cock, eventually leaning in and licking at the head of his cock, more than a little thrilled to be doing this with the other while they were in the bus.

Kyo had returned to stroking Die's length when he felt the other licking at him, causing him to let out a groan. He turned to look up at Die and whispered softly. "Don't buck your hips..." With that, he leaned in and wrapped his lips around the head of Die's dick, using his hand to stroke the rest of it, not wanting to harm his throat. 

Die grunted, perhaps a bit loudly the moment the other started giving him head. The fact that he was willing to do this while they were on tour made him immensely happy and he did his best to not even move his lower half at all. He made up for it by going to town on Kyo's cock, bobbing his head and sucking, his motions almost desperate in nature.

Kyo let Die's cock slip further into his mouth, keeping it from entering his throat as he bobbed his head carefully. He let out a muffled groaned at Die's actions, his hips rocking slightly, his free hand moving to find Die's, squeezing it, seeking another level of connection between them. 

Die's free hand grasped Kyo's tightly when the other took it in his own. He let out a muffled little sound around Kyo's dick, sucking particularly hard for a moment before popping off and gasping for air, his lips red from his actions.

Kyo moved to lap at the head of Die's length, dipping his tongue into the slit as he dropped his hand to cup and roll his sac. When Die pulled off for air, he glanced up at him, letting out a low groan. 

Die grunted a little and then pushed his head down on Kyo's dick again, bobbing his head over the other's length, enjoying it quite readily. He wouldn't admit it, but it was his first time actually blowing someone and getting blown at the same time and it was amazing.

Kyo paused his actions for a moment, just enjoying what Die was doing and wishing like hell he could return the favor fully. He bucked his hips slightly, giving Die's hand a squeeze before going back to work on his length, suckling and lapping around the tip. 

Die managed to squirm around until he had his free hand on Kyo's inner thigh, lightly rubbing there as he sucked him, just enjoying the opportunity to fully enjoy his lover this way.

Kyo let out a sound of pleasure at Die's touches, shifting to do the same, brushing against the neatly trimmed patch of pubic hair at the base of the other's length as he moved his mouth down, placing kisses and licks all along it. 

Die kept up his work until he couldn't possibly anymore, his jaw seriously getting sore. He pulled back and worked his jaw a bit, his hand moving to wrap around the other's dick and stroking him instead.

Kyo groaned when Die pulled off and stroked him inside, bucking into his hand. He was almost there, his orgasm building slowly, heat pooling in the heat of his stomach. He wrapped his hand around Die's length again, mimicking his actions as he stroked him, going back to licking and sucking at the head. 

It took Die a minute before he felt confident his jaw wasn't going to cramp up again. He pushed his head back down on the other's length, taking in as much of him as he could and then moaning, hoping that'd help.

When Die engulfed his cock again, it pushed Kyo over that edge. He moaned around Die's dick as he started cumming into the other's mouth, his hand squeezing the base a bit. "Mmm!"

Die swallowed everything that Kyo gave him, though he had to pull his hips back from the other to keep from bucking toward him. The moment Kyo was done, he pulled back and reached down to frantically try to pull Kyo back toward his dick, a little whimper leaving him.

Kyo groaned and took Die deep into his mouth, sucking him harshly as he cupped and squeezed his sac, glancing up at Die and silently urging him to cum. 

Die let himself very slightly tilt his hips a few times, the motion helping him over the edge. When he did cum, he didn't warn Kyo, figuring if he didn't want to swallow it, he'd just let it dribble out.

Kyo groaned when Die's orgasm hit, slightly surprised though he had known the other was close. He thought about it for about two seconds then swallowed it all, slowly and carefully taking Die's full length into his mouth just as the last spurt shot down his throat. He swallowed around Die a couple of times before pulling his head up with a groan. "God..."

Die let out a grunt as he finished up, sort of sagging against the wall and laying there, his head on Kyo's thigh and a dopy-ass look on his face.

Kyo let his head flop against Die's lower stomach, his hand stroking over the skin there as he gazed up at him. "You are... incredible."

Die gave him a little smirk and then sighed softly, nuzzling against his thigh. "Mmm... always glad to give you all my enthusiasm in that department." He winked at the other and chuckled softly before staring up at the ceiling, an odd look on his face. Very faintly, someone could be heard jerking off, the distinct sound of hand-on-dick making its way into their bunk.

Kyo was about to respond when he heard the sound too, it taking a bit longer to register to him what it was. He raised an eyebrow and slowly shifted so that he was laying the right way in the bunk, smirking a bit as he whispered to Die. "Guess we weren't the only ones... or did we give someone a free show?" 

Die let out a low little chuckle. "Mmm... I suspect a show... a sound show at least." He smirked a little. "Ten bucks it's Kaoru."

Kyo chuckled then cocked his head a bit, trying to pinpoint where the sound was coming from. "I bet it is... he always goes to wash his hands after so... we'll just wait and see." He smirked and twitched the curtain open just enough that they would be able to see anyone walking towards the bathroom. 

Die arched his eyebrow at Kyo's knowledge of other people's masturbation rituals. So he supposed he wasn't the only one listening to other people and paying attention at times. He waited, hearing a low groan after a few moments and then the sound of tissues being pulled out from a box.

Kyo shrugged at Die's raised eyebrow. "You aren't the only one that has trouble sleeping on the bus." When he heard the tissues being pulled out, he shifted closer to the edge of the bunk, peering out through the tiny crack and waiting. 

A few minutes passed and finally someone's feet hit the floor and a pair of legs passed by Die's vision, clad in khaki pants. Die pumped his fist in the air, knowing the only person to have a pair besides himself.

Kyo spotted a tattooed hand as it passed them by and he almost laughed. "Knew it..." 

"Too bad no one's going to give me ten bucks," he murmured and then chuckled, shaking his head and closing his eyes once more.

Kyo snorted and turned, nuzzling Die's neck, whispering. "I'll give you ten bucks... in the first hotel we stop at."

Die chuckled. He reached to grope Kyo. "This doesn't look like a bill to me, feels more like a giant roll of coins."

Kyo grunted slightly, his hips jerking a bit at the grope. "Mmm, I never said it'd be delivered in bills, baby."

He grinned and then rolled over on his side. "Mmm... well... good morning... now that we're more awake and less... fucking." He smirked a little.

Kyo laughed softly and glanced up at Die. "Mm, good morning to you too. Though, I have to admit, I like the part where we're fucking." 

"I have a confession," he leaned in and whispered, "I could wake up like that every single morning." He licked at his neck and then rolled out of the bunk, getting up and damn near running right into Kaoru.

Kaoru backed up and gasped. "Hey!"

Die just grinned at him. "Good morning to you, too, Kaoru. I hope you had a nice morning." He winked and then sauntered off toward the front of the bus.

Kyo grinned then moved to follow Die from the bunk, witnessing the exchange between the two. He shot Kaoru a smirk then followed after Die, a slight sway to his hips. "Is there coffee on board?"

Kaoru stood there, looking stunned as Kyo got out of the bunk as well. He knew he'd been caught, but he didn't know how to feel about that. He put on a hard face and just grunted, brushing past Kyo a bit roughly.

Kyo raised an eyebrow and looked annoyed. "Oi... excuse you." 

Kaoru muttered something that may or may not have been an apology before disappearing into the little curtained off area in the back for changing.

Die shook coffee grounds in the can to get Kyo's attention, tilting his head a little. "Coffee?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose in Kaoru's general direction before turning his attention back to Die. "Yes, please...."

Die started to make the coffee, waiting until Kyo was close and then murmuring softly, "He's such a prick about it. Someone just needs to give him a freaking kick to the ass."

Kyo leaned against the counter near Die, snorting at his comment and nodding. "Yeah, no kidding...part of me would love to just break him out of it." 

"Maybe he needs it. He's starting to piss me off... and we both know how that ends. With my fist in his face." He sighed and finished putting the coffee grounds in the filter, adding water and then turning it on to wait.

Kyo sighed slightly, shaking his head. "I really don't want you two fighting, especially while we're on the road in another country." He stroked his chin then glanced towards the bunks. "Maybe we could get him drunk and loosen him up some... figuratively and literally."

"Maybe... I have a good idea what's eating him, but it's just gotten to that point where I want to knock some new brain cells around in there. Maybe best if you at least try talking to him before we include me?"

Kyo nodded, running a hand through his hair. "Yeah, maybe so... I can try at least. Maybe tonight, after the show and after he's had a few?" 

Die nodded a little. "It sounds like maybe a good time. A bit tired, running high from the show. Just don't catch him on the downturn."

Kyo licked his lips then turned to the coffee maker, seeing that it was done. He grabbed a cup and filled it before moving to sit at the table. "It might work...”

Die shrugged a little, following suit and then settling down. He glanced up as Shinya shuffled through the area and gave him a little wave. Shinya grunted, waved back, and disappeared into the bathroom.

Kyo glanced up at Shinya, nodding to him then turning back to his coffee, yawning slightly. After a little bit, Toshiya padded out, grabbed a cup of coffee then disappeared again, his voice being heard as he greeted Kaoru and offered him the coffee. 

Die glanced over at Kyo and then toward the sound of Toshiya and Kaoru's voices. He pursed his lips a little, something flashing in his eyes for a moment before he looked back down and finished up with the coffee.

Kyo raised an eyebrow at the look on Die's face, muttering softly. "What?"

Die shook his head a little. "I don't know if I'm right, so I'll just keep it to myself for now. But... if I get more evidence, then I'll say."

Kyo hummed and nodded, shrugging a bit then yawning, pillowing his head on his hands for a moment. 

Die drank a bit of his coffee and then came to sit next to Kyo, straining to see if he could hear anything else from the back of the bus, any indication of Toshiya or Kaoru saying anything more.

A few moments later, Toshiya slipped from the back looking less than happy. He went and poured himself a cup of coffee then glanced to Die and Kyo before nodding towards the bunk area. "Apparently, some people aren't morning people." 

Die frowned a bit more and scooted more toward Kyo, making space for Toshiya. "Sit... we won't bite... much." He tried on a little smile for the joke.

Kyo snorted and moved over as well, giving Die more room so Toshiya could sit without being squashed. He peered over at the bassist with a curious look then made himself comfortable again, leaning into Die a bit, remembering that they didn't have to hide anything. 

Toshiya huffed out a short laugh at Die's joke then sighed and plopped down next to him, taking a sip of his coffee. 

Die drank more of his coffee before saying a word, finally looking over at Toshiya, his arm around Kyo's waist by then. "So... he’s been being an asshole to you, too? I sort of thought it was only us because... well... you know."

Toshiya hesitated then let out a bitter laugh, a pained look on his face. "He's being an asshole to everyone but Nora, actually. Thought, admittedly, it's gotten worse since you two...." he licked his lips and looked a bit guilty. "I... I don't know what it is... he's never been so irritable like this. I mean, we all have our moods but his has been constant the past few weeks." 

Die thought about it for a moment before deciding to just be perfectly honest. "I think he's got his ass so far in the closet that he can't see the light of day. And he's pissed we can be okay and open with it while he stews about his own sexuality."

Toshiya blinked then turned to look at Die, an unreadable look on his face. "Eh, you... you think so? I've seen him with plenty of girls." 

Die shrugged and then glanced at Kyo. "Mind if I tell him what happened before we left?"

Kyo coughed and looked at Toshiya then back to Die before waving his hand, ducking his head a bit. "Go ahead... such as it is." 

Toshiya raised an eyebrow and looked between the two. "What did you do?" 

"We got... overzealous at work," he glanced back and lowered his voice, "and Kaoru walked in on us. He didn't bother to walk out... instead, he stayed and jerked off to us doing it. But afterward, he got real pissy and I damn near got in a fist fight with him." Die sighed and shook his head. "Closet, I'm telling you."

Toshiya gaped at Die's story, finding it hard to believe that Kaoru would just stand there and watch, much less jack off to such a thing. "What the hell? Is that why things have been off between you two?" 

Die nodded a little. "I think he's feeling awkward that it arouses him and he can't control the urge to do something about it. And the fact that I'm not shy about it makes him flip out at me because I am what he can't be. He's been... slightly nicer to Kyo... yeah?" He glanced at his lover to double-check.

Kyo perked up from his half dozing state; having been a bit comfortable leaning against Die. "Ahh, yeah, somewhat. Mostly, he just doesn't talk to me except to ask about the monitors or sound.”

Toshiya chewed his bottom lip then let out a sigh, scrubbing his hands through his hair. "So... how does one even go about getting him to open up? If we force the issue, he'll just end up punching one of us." 

Die shrugged. "I volunteer to get punched if that's what it takes. I'll take his ass and beat it until we're both satisfied that we're done." He sighed. "I'm not afraid to get into it with him. It's just that it's sort of... counterproductive."

Kyo shook his head, reaching out to place his hand on Die's arm. "That wouldn't work out and it would just be a headache." He glanced over at Toshiya. "Maybe, someone else could." 

Toshiya frowned a bit then shrugged. "I could try, maybe?" 

Die studied Toshiya for a long moment and then just got done with it and said what was on his mind. "I'm under the impression you have... a bit to invest in this... are you sure you want to be the one to get lashed out at?"

Toshiya hesitated then hung his head, fidgeting with his coffee cup. "Is... is that obvious? And I can take it...I don't think he'd hit me at least." 

Die reached one hand across the table and placed it on the other's hand. "It's... well... let me put it this way, you have the same look I have had on my face for the past few years before I worked things out with Kyo."

Toshiya flushed darkly, letting his hand stay under Die's for a moment before letting out a huff, shaking his head. "It's... pathetic really. I knew or was pretty sure he wasn't... you know... but I still found myself pining away, especially after I'd gotten drunk at the after parties. I couldn't stop hanging on him." 

Kyo spoke up then. "It isn't pathetic to desire someone. What's pathetic is that you could be missing precious moments of life with him." He reached and intertwined his fingers with Die's, squeezing lightly. "Although, I do have to agree that it may not be the best idea for you to go head-to-head with him just yet."

Die pursed his lips a little and then finally murmured, "Kyo... you can keep a rational head on you if you try. Do you think you could poke the bear?"

Kyo hummed and nodded slightly. "I could at least poke him the first time." He looked at Toshiya and offered the bassist a slight smile. "Eventually though, you're going to have to grow a pair." 

Die squeezed Kyo's waist gently and huffed out a little sigh. "Company," he muttered under his breath, hearing Kaoru's distinct shuffling coming toward them.

Toshiya was about to answer but looked up in the direction of the footsteps. He gave Die and Kyo a pinched look before waving lamely as Kaoru appeared past the divider. 

Kyo glanced up but didn't say anything, instead, he leaned more into Die, yawning again.

Kaoru wandered in and then went to get coffee, turning around once he was done and sort of glowering at the three of them over the top of his cup.

Die pursed his lips a little and rolled his eyes. "Good morning, groucho."

Toshiya looked guilty and after a moment of being glared at, he grabbed his coffee cup and scooted past Kaoru to head back into the bunk area, muttering a soft, "Excuse me," as he did. 

Kyo stared Kaoru down, not appreciating the look he was getting. He knew that tonight, after their show and maybe after he let off a little steam with Die... he'd have to have that chat with the guitarist. 

Die leaned over and gave Kyo a gentle kiss on the cheek before getting up and purposely getting into Kaoru's space for a moment. He stretched, right next to him, watching his reaction. After a moment, he murmured, "Gonna get dressed," and wandered off toward the back.

Kaoru, for his part, looked purely horrified at having so many people in his space so quickly. Though, the moment Die was in it, he shivered and clenched his teeth, eyes darting to Die and then away again, a certain nervousness in the air.

Kyo caught the whole exchange, the slightest territorial look in his eyes as he witnessed Kaoru's reaction to Die's closeness. Yes, the man was definitely having some issues there. 

Die hummed to himself as he started to get dressed, putting on his concert clothing except his sandals, not wanting to put on boots just yet. He figured the fans were used to his feet by now.

Kaoru found himself staring at the floor, the hand holding his cup shaking ever so slightly. 

Kyo finally stood up and moved towards the back, pausing in front of Kaoru and taking his coffee cup away, setting it on the counter. "Should probably hold off on the caffeine if it's going to make you so jittery." He gave Kaoru a little smirk the headed back to the changing area, pulling on his standard track suit and sneakers. 

Die shifted behind Kyo and took his hand, pressing it to his belly and arching a bit toward him as he breathed a soft little moan into the other's ear. He didn't explain, didn't do anything more than that, just let go and headed back toward the front of the bus, a little smirk on his face.

Kyo stopped and shivered a little bit a Die's actions, an electric jolt of arousal shooting through his body. He had to stand there for a few minutes to get a handle on himself before he headed up front as well, making himself comfortable on the couch, whispering to Die. "Tease..."

Die leaned back against the counter and pulled his shirt up a little, showing how his belly was a bit distended and he gave him a naughty look before letting his shirt fall back down and then hopping up on the counter, swinging his legs. "How long do you give it?"

Kyo chuckled slightly and shook his head, looking around before giving Die's stomach a light pat. "An hour at the most." He bit his lip then glanced up at Die. "Gonna share...?" 

Die's eyes sparkled a bit at the very thought of Kyo allowing him to share and he huffed out a soft groan before tilting his head back. "Definitely."

Kaoru walked up about halfway through the exchange, watching them for a long moment and then finally voicing, "Share what?"

Kyo smirked then shifted his gaze to Kaoru, raising an eyebrow. He didn't really think sharing something like that with Kaoru would be a good idea at the moment, but part of him was damn tempted to. 

Die immediately spit out, "I'm thinking of getting waxed." He couldn't think of anything else to say that would get the focus off what it really was faster and he definitely didn't want Kaoru knowing about his fetish.

Kyo chuckled at that and shook his head. "I think it'd be damn sexy... and a lot easier than just shaving it all off." 

Kaoru screwed up his nose. "Hurt like a motherfucker. Guess you like the pain, though, given _who_ you've decided to be with." He stalked off after that, an even sourer look on his face.

Kyo felt like he'd been slapped in the face at Kaoru's comment. He didn't know what the guitarist meant by it, but it pissed him off and he found himself clenching his jaw so tight it hurt. He couldn't afford a screaming match with Kaoru right then but there would be one later. That much he knew. 

Die pushed himself off the counter and went right after Kaoru. "Hey! That was uncalled for!" He grabbed Kaoru's shoulder. "I get you insulting me. That's fine, do what you have to do. But do _not_ involve him in your bullshit. Do you understand me?"

Kaoru looked likely to punch Die in the face at any moment, his fists curling by his sides as he took what supposed to be a menacing half-step toward Die.

"Do it. Just fucking do it already," Die let out, his voice a low growl.

Kyo stood up and got behind Die, tugging his arm slightly. "Just leave it... this isn't worth it." He glared at Kaoru, daring him to actually hit Die. He'd tear him apart if he did.

Die tried to shrug Kyo off of him, looking beyond pissed. "No. It's gotten to a point where I can't tolerate the bullshit anymore." He jabbed a finger at Kaoru. "Just talk about your fucking problems once in a goddamn while. I never pegged you for a homophobic asshole until all of this started... and it's not making me happy with you at all. We were friends, Kaoru... fucking friends. And now you pull this bullshit all the goddamn time. No friend does that." He looked ready to spit, he was so angry. "And no coworker should either." He then took his leave of the situation, turning away and heading toward the front of the bus and the bus driver.

Kaoru just stood there, looking insanely pissed off, but not saying a word. He didn't know what he could say to that.

Kyo swallowed and looked after Die then back to Kaoru. He hesitated for a moment before crossing his arms and fixing the other with a hard look. "We need to talk."

Kaoru's eyes swiftly switched from Die to Kyo and he arched an eyebrow. "Oh do we now?"

Kyo licked his lips and nodded shortly. "Yes... because I'm sick of your bullshit, too. So, either fess up and tell what your problem is with me and Die or shut the fuck up and let us be happy. Die's right, you two were friends, _close_ friends. Now you're trying to throw that all away on something that I don't think you understand."

The bus stopped rather abruptly and Die exited the bus. After a few moments, all that could be heard was some cussing and glass breaking outside.

Kaoru had to reach out and grab the side of the counter for support and he made a face as he righted himself, staring at Kyo again after a moment. "Fess up? To what exactly? I don't think I have a damn thing to fess up to, Kyo."

Kyo stumbled and almost fell over. He let out a curse and glanced towards the front of the bus. "You're lying to yourself then." He sighed and dragged a hand through his hair. "Either way, this shit needs to stop." He wanted to continue the conversation but concern for Die made him turn and quickly find his way to the exit. He got off and looked around for Die, not seeing him immediately and slightly panicking. "Die..." 

Die came back around the side of the bus when Kyo called to him, carrying some broken bottle pieces. "Sorry... closest thing was a beer bottle from the other night, so I took it out on it rather than Kaoru's face." He shrugged a little. "Didn't mean to worry you."

Kyo just shook his head and went to Die, slipping his arms around his waist and pulling him close. 

Die leaned into Kyo's touch, sighing softly and shaking his head a little. "I honestly... do not know how to get through to him without making a huge mess."

Kyo frowned and nodded. "He's... being a stubborn jackass. I don't know what to do." He rubbed Die's back lightly, sighing. 

 

Kaoru just stared after Kyo, the look on his face completely unreadable as he moved to sit down on the now-vacated couch.

Toshiya had witnessed the whole thing and when Kyo left the bus, he moved to the front and sat on the opposite end of the couch as Kaoru, glancing at him. "You know... you're being a little unfair to them." 

Kaoru glanced up at Toshiya, a little frown on his face. "They're being too public about this shit. It's pissing me off."

Toshiya looked away and tugged at a string on his shirt. "Are they really? So far, it's only been in the privacy of the bus, Kao." 

Kaoru clenched his jaw a little and looked down. "I mean too public for me... in front of me, around me, near me, where I can hear it."

Toshiya cocked his head slightly. "Why do you care so much? It's not as if you're jealous, right?"

Kaoru looked almost ready to explode at that, but he tamped it down, reminding himself that Toshiya wasn't the one causing his problems. He took in a deep breath and then just shook his head. "Don't want to talk about why. I just do."

Toshiya looked rather sad at that and just shook his head, standing up to go back to his bunk for a while. Before he left, he turned to look at Kaoru with a frown. "Just be careful whose toes you're stepping on. You forget, Kyo's sensitive... he may look hard on the outside but he internalizes things... insults... and Die's likely to break your nose the next time he sees you." He shrugged then disappeared quickly, crawling into his bunk and shutting out the world as best as he could.

Kaoru looked after Toshiya, an odd sort of look on his face.

Die shifted a little against Kyo, finally pulling back, a slight pained look on his face. "Remember that hour? I may have overestimated that. Fuck..." he pushed his free hand into his pocket to sort of grope at himself with another wince, giving Kyo a shifty glance.

Kyo blinked at Die then let out a laugh, looking around and realizing they were kinda in the middle of nowhere at the moment, pulled off on a little side road. He spotted a sizeable tree and pointed to it. "Make like a dog...."

Die shrugged a little and headed off toward the tree. He got there, dropped the glass shards and quickly got his pants unzipped and his dick out, barely managing that before he started pissing, letting out a groan that should have told of an orgasm at the relief he felt as he started to water the tree.

Kyo followed Die, watching him for a moment before coming beside him, careful to stay out of the stream as he reached out and grasped his dick, stroking it slightly as he pissed.

Die groaned as Kyo took his dick, stroking him while he pissed. "Yeah... just like that. God... you're making me hard." He pushed harder, his piss splashing off the tree trunk and making a huge puddle on the ground. "I could cum... so easy right now. Are you gonna jerk me off when I'm done pissing, baby?" He couldn't help the dirty talk right then, so aroused it was just pouring from his mouth.

Kyo smirked, moving a bit closer to Die to get a better grip, continuing his motions as Die's piss splattered everywhere. "Yes, I want you to cum, baby... all over the tree." He reached down with his free hand and groped himself, feeding off of Die's arousal. 

Die finally finished emptying his bladder, one hand supporting himself against the tree, the other reaching to help Kyo get his cock out of his pants. He wasn't going to get all the way through this without at least touching his dick. "Jerk me off. I'm ready, I'm gonna cum so fast for you."

Kyo groaned and shifted so Die could get to him, glad for the touch as he wrapped his fingers more around Die's dick and jerking him off hard and fast, not making any pretenses about being slow or anything. "Fuck Die..." 

Die's fingers closed around Kyo's cock and he started jerking him off with equal fervor, his hips bucking forward. He didn't care right then if anyone did see them. He'd write it off somehow if he had to. But frankly, he didn't give a shit. "You're so hard... so fucking hard."

Kyo grunted and jerked his hips forward into Die's hand, closing his eyes and shivering. "All for you, Die. All for you." He swiped his thumb over the tip of Die's dick, smearing a few droplets of piss and pre-cum around then went back to stroking him, squeezing a bit. 

Die found himself on the verge of orgasm very quickly. His hand moved over Kyo's cock quite fast as he arched into his lover's hand. "Ah!" he let out, hips jerking a few times as his other hand moved to grab Kyo's hand, holding it tightly in place while he fucked it. He stopped with the head of his cock in Kyo's palm as he started to cum, doing it on purpose, wanting to feel his cum fill Kyo's hand.

Kyo hand to use his free hand to hold onto Die's shoulder as his hips bucked into the hand moving over his cock. He moaned softly when Die just started fucking his hand and then again at the feel of warm cum spilling into it. "Oh... fuck... Die... yes!" 

Die pushed his cock through the mess in Kyo's hand a few times before he pulled back and squatted down, taking Kyo's cock into his mouth without so much as a word of warning, sucking him hard and bobbing his head quickly.

Kyo was about to smear Die's cum on the tree trunk when his lover's mouth engulfed him, causing his knees to damn near buckle. "Oh God! Die... shit!" His clean hand tangled in Die's hair, his hips snapping forward slightly. 

Die took it like a champ, not choking or anything, just letting Kyo go after him. He reached down to start putting his dick away while he continued to suck his cock, everything about him screaming that he loved what he was doing.

Kyo growled then pushing his dick down Die's throat, tugging his hair as a brief warning before he started to cum. "Fuck yes!" He pulled back slightly, rocking his hips as he finished up then pulled himself free of Die's mouth, giving him a dirty look as he smeared the rest onto his lips. "You're so goddamn sexy like that..."

Die swallowed everything Kyo gave him, allowing him to give him the last bit on his lips. He smirked up at him as he licked his lips clean, cheeks flushed, and a look of pure relief on his face. "I think... we've found how I don't pound Kaoru's face in."

Kyo chuckled and slumped against the tree, petting Die's hair. "I think I can deal with that method." 

Die licked his lips again as he stood back up. He swiped one hand over his mouth to make sure he got it all and then finished putting his pants back together. "Think anyone saw us?"

Kyo glanced around and shrugged. "I don't think so, you picked one hell of a deserted place to stop. I imagine the rest of the crew is going to be mighty confused at this point." He gave Die a grin, moving in to kiss him lightly before making sure his own clothes were settled. 

"Yeah... well... this wasn't my intention, but I was about to explode... apparently in two ways." He laughed and glanced at the tree and the ground under it and then nodded toward the bus. "C'mon."

Kyo chuckled and made sure his clothing was arranged before grabbing Die's hand and walking back towards the bus. "So, you think Toshiya's got it bad for Kaoru?" 

Die glanced over at Kyo, his long fingers curling around the vocalist's smaller hand. "Yeah... I do. He seriously looks like I used to. It's the same face I stared into for years in the mirror every day, Kyo."

Kyo licked his lips and squeezed Die's hand, his face warming the slightest. He still couldn't wrap his head around the fact that Die had pined for him for years. "I hope he sorts it out soon then..."

"I do, too... that's not a nice place to be." He squeezed Kyo's hand in his own ever so gently. "This is a much better place."

Kyo smiled and paused near the bus, tugging Die to him and leaning up to kiss him softly. "Yes, it is..." He moved to open the door, not caring if anyone saw them. 

Die kissed him back gently before parting from him and entering the bus, reluctantly letting go of Kyo's hand for the climb up the steep steps. He made it to the top to find Kaoru standing there, his arms crossed over his chest, and he just pursed his lips and pushed past him, not bothering with a single word. It just wasn't worth it.

Kyo followed Die, catching sight of Kaoru and biting his lip. He wanted to say something but didn't, giving him a slight smirk instead as he moved past him, heading for the bathroom so he could wash his hands. 

Die grabbed some sanitizer and went to the sink next to the coffee pot, washing up a bit and then plopping down on the couch, firmly placing his head in the clouds for what he hoped would be a while. He didn't want to deal with Kaoru anymore right then and honestly, not much else until he had to be on stage.

Kaoru just looked between the pair, a grim look on his face as he took a seat up in the front of the bus and stuck his nose in a magazine that he couldn't even read.

Kyo finished washing his hands then joined Die on the couch, not saying anything as he grabbed Shinya's iPad, having asked to use it on his way by. 

Die eventually moved to curl up against Kyo's side, just staring off into nowhere for the longest time. He didn't want to think, didn't want to ruin what had happened outside and how it had calmed him down and this seemed the easiest way out of them all to remain attached to it.

Kyo didn't even look up from the article he was reading, simply reaching out to stroke Die's hair softly, trying to ignore the still heavy atmosphere on the bus. It wasn't like they could spend the entire time in their bunks so Kaoru would just have to get over it. 

**To Be Continued...**


	11. Chapter 11

It took them a few hours more before the bus stopped in the parking lot of a small diner in what looked to be the middle of nowhere. Die peeled himself up off the seat with a sigh. He desperately wanted a cigarette, but he didn't say anything, just looking at the building. "Think we should brave it?"

Kyo blinked and rubbed his eyes, having dozed off. He needed to piss and was kind of hungry by that point. "Ehh, maybe together?" He glanced at Kaoru, who was also snoozing and then at Toshiya, who was trying, but failing, to pretend like he was reading instead of watching Kaoru. Shinya was playing cards with Nora and not paying attention to them either. "Yeah, I say we brave it. Bathroom and then food." 

Die grabbed his bag and headed for the front of the bus, going out as quietly as possible so as to not wake Kaoru on the way out. Once outside, he headed right for the building, still fighting the urge to pull out a cigarette and smoke the hell out of it.

Kyo nodded and stood up, combing his hands through his hair then following Die. As they walked, he glanced over at Die. "Smoke one if you want to, babe..." 

Die finally stopped just outside the diner and swallowed a bit, looking sheepishly over at Kyo. "Is it that obvious?" he murmured softly, reaching into his bag and digging one out. "I'm... trying to quit. But I just can't when we're on tour and this bullshit is going around all over the place. Maybe when we're home... when I don't have to deal with Mr. Grumpy-Pants."

Kyo chuckled softly and reached out to pat Die's shoulder. "I know. I never could quit on tour either... just hurry up. I have to piss and frankly, I don't want to go in there alone." 

Die lit the cigarette and took a long, much-needed drag. He let out a tiny sound when he exhaled, blowing the smoke away from Kyo, not wanting to get him in it given his voice and the fact that they were on tour.

Kyo smiled at the gesture, moving to lean against the building, hoping the patrons inside weren't being too curious about what they were doing. 

It only took a few minutes for Die to finish up the cigarette and then put the butt out in the gravel ashtray atop the trash can. "Okay... bathroom stop and then food."

Kyo let out a sigh. "Okay, just hope the toilet is sanitary." He opened the door for Die to go in first then followed him, glancing around uneasily at the dimly lit diner. It seemed more homey than sleazy though and for that, he was thankful. 

Die headed straight for the bathroom and slipped inside, it was a single stall and a single urinal. He headed for the stall and slipped inside, undoing his pants and pushing them back a bit, starting to relieve himself into the toilet.

Kyo slipped in after Die and snorted as he took the stall. "Shy?" He moved to the urinal and pushed his pants out of the way, letting go into the fairly clean urinal. "Ahh..."

"I thought I'd be nice and let you use the more convenient one." He let out a little laugh, finishing up and tucking himself away, zipping up, and then heading to wash his hands.

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "What a gentleman." He finished up himself and adjusted his pants back into place then joined Die at the sink, playfully bumping hips with him. 

Die glanced at the door and then quickly wiped his hands off on his jeans and grabbed Kyo, kissing him harshly on the lips before letting him go and licking them. "Better than dinner..." he smirked a little and sauntered out of the restroom and to one of the open booths, settling down. They wouldn't leave without them and he wasn't leaving until he had some food in him and a non-bumpy place to eat it.

Kyo grunted into the kiss, catching a squeeze of Die's ass before he managed to get out the door, smirking at him. "Mhm." He moved out and plopped down in the booth with Die, picking up the menu and staring it with some amount of frustration. "Err...." 

Die patiently started down the menu, mumbling like he was reading it to himself, but loud enough for Kyo to hear it as well. "Chicken fried steak, hamburger, chicken and... waffles?" he looked a bit confused for a moment. "Breakfast sampler... eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, and toast or pancakes... club sandwich, BLT... er... bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwich... pork loin dinner, spaghetti and meatballs, fried popcorn shrimp." He stopped reading and glanced over to see if Kyo wanted anything he'd read so far.

Kyo smiled slightly then raised an eyebrow. "Chicken and waffles?" He shook his head then thought about it for a moment, trying to decide if any of it sounded good. "Chicken fried steak... I think." 

"I want the pork loin dinner... with salad." He smirked a little. "Do you want brown or white gravy? And baked potato or mashed potatoes?" Glancing up, Die caught the waitress walking toward them. "And what to drink?"

Kyo bit his lip. "Brown gravy and mashed potatoes... and tea." He looked at Die a little sheepishly. "Thanks." 

When the waitress came, Die ordered both their meals, pushing the menus to her and then settling back in the booth. "She's cute." It was out of his mouth before he could stop it and he flushed. "Not that way! I swear! I just... fuck." He sighed and ducked his head.

Kyo huffed out a sigh and looked at the waitress as she walked off, wrinkling his nose. "Old habits _die_ hard, hmm?" He reached out with his foot and lightly kicked Die's shin under the table, a slight smirk on his face. 

"Hey!" Die seemed to shrink in on himself a little bit more as he crossed his arms over his chest. "It's not that, it really isn't. The way she carries herself, she knows she's at least attractive. Not overconfident. It's just... cute. But not like cute in a I'd-want-to fuck-her kind of way." He sighed, looking out the window, wishing he'd just stayed in the damn bus now, his mouth getting him into more trouble than this was worth.

Kyo just stared at Die for a moment before laughing, which continued for several minutes until he was holding his stomach. Die defending himself was hilarious, especially the way he got all flustered. He finally managed to stop laughing and used his foot to pat Die's leg. "Aw, you're so cute... but not in a I-want-to-fuck-you kind of way." 

Die didn't know what to make of Kyo laughing at him. He supposed he'd expected Kyo to be angry, to blow up at him or something. So far, he'd yet to have made such a stupid move and he'd expected backlash that was obviously not happening any time soon.

He sighed a little and shook his head, cheeks heating up a bit. "Hey... be nice."

Kyo smiled, softer this time. "I am being nice, baby. I just think at this point, it'd be ridiculous for me to get overly jealous over you commenting about how cute some waitress is. Although, if you'd openly flirted with her, I might have been a bit annoyed."

Die let out a soft hiss between his teeth. "I thought I made it clear I'm not into women anymore." He sighed and reached for a sugar packet, turning it over and over in his hands. "Though... honestly, you're right about old habits. I still look because I feel like I'm supposed to. I got so used to it; it's hard to break it."

Kyo sighed softly and shook his head, looking around before reaching out and placing his hand on Die's. "Oi... I was only teasing you." He pulled his hand back and shrugged a bit, feeling a bit bad for laughing at Die. 

He glanced over at Kyo, feeling something special well up inside him at the fact that the other was willing to chance touching him like that in public. He opened his mouth to answer, but he stared in shock as Kaoru slid into the booth opposite them. Slim fingers splayed out on the table. "Thanks for waking me..."

Kyo jumped slightly as Kaoru spoke, looking over at their bandmate. He pressed his lips together in a thin line, waving his hand. "We didn't want to disturb your beauty rest... though it doesn't seem to have had much of an effect." He smirked, the jab at Kaoru was more like their good natured ribbing that seemed absent lately. 

Die busied himself with the sugar packets and little containers of creamer, making stacks and whatnot, trying not to get involved in this whole thing.

Kaoru, for his part, started to look grumpy, but then took in Kyo's smirk and took it for what it was. "Asshole," he muttered out, picking up a sugar packet and tossing it into Die's creation, watching it crumble. "Order me something with toast."

Kyo snorted and then looked at Die, shrugging slightly. "I'm not sure that's on the menu. 'Something with toast.' You'd have to be more specific." 

Die glowered at Kaoru before starting to rebuild his little structure. "Breakfast sampler has toast... club sandwich has toast." He shrugged a little, focusing on balancing some sugar packets.

"Breakfast sampler I guess." Kaoru shifted a little and then sighed, looking out the window. "Look... I know I've been an asshole and maybe we need to talk about that."

Kyo blinked and looked up at Kaoru, nodding. "Yeah... you have been. So, talk." He fixed the other guitarist with a look. He was willing to listen to him, but refused to accept any bullshit about it. 

Die gently nudged Kyo. "Let me out so I can order his food," he murmured. "I'll be right back."

Kyo nodded and stood up to let Die out, scooting back into place afterwards, giving him a slightly concerned look. The tension was obvious on his lover's face and he found himself reaching out and giving him a light squeeze on the arm. 

Die paused long enough to let the other touch him before he went to tell the waitress what Kaoru wanted to eat, just ordering club sandwiches for the others, Nora and the driver included. He knew Kuroo could order his own as well as the other roadies if they wanted to.

Kaoru watched Die get up and leave before he looked back at Kyo and sighed. "I... I can't explain a lot of it, but I guess I feel affronted by it, like seeing you both together gets to me somehow." He shrugged a little. "And I do things I shouldn't, and normally wouldn't, do."

Kyo peered at Kaoru, listening to him, his hands folded in front of him on the table. He let out a slight sigh and shook his head. "I have a theory... on why it bothers you so much." He was treading dangerous water here but since Kaoru had come willing and prepared to talk, maybe he wouldn't fly off the handle.

Kaoru pursed his lips a little and then murmured a quiet, "Oh?"

Kyo leaned back and crossed his arms, fixing Kaoru with a serious look. "You're bothered by it so much because you're jealous that we're so comfortable with our sexuality and you can't find your way out of the back of that closet you seem to have stuffed yourself in." 

Amazingly Kaoru didn't get worked up about it. Instead, he sat there and carefully considered the other's words. After a moment, he shakily offered, "I... think I need to throw up. Excuse me." He got up and sort of stumbled toward the bathroom.

Die watched Kaoru go, coming back to the table and frowning a little as he gestured he wanted back into the booth. "What was that all about?"

Kyo blinked at Kaoru's statement the looked up at Die, standing to let him back in. "I don't know... I told him I thought he was buried in the closet and he just said he had to puke." 

Die let out a little chuckle. "Mmm... well... I'm familiar with that feeling. Just let him get it out and then he'll come back. That... was the truth settling in."

Kyo shook his head, shrugging. "I hope that's all it was... we don't need a virus running around."

Die shook his head. "Trust me on this one. I've been there and done that." He sighed and sat back. "He just sat there with a blank look on his face and then said he had to?"

Kyo raised an eyebrow then nodded. "Yeah, pretty much... broke out into a sweat then darted off." 

Kaoru came back to the table, looking a bit less pale, sitting down and swiping one of the sugar packets from Die's pile, starting to nervously shred the edges of it. "I... what makes you think that?"

Kyo stared at Kaoru then let out a little chuckle. "Among other things, you just went and got sick just because I said that." He glanced at Die then licked his lips. "You also can't seem to stop yourself from getting aroused by our... activities."

Kaoru shifted uncomfortably, shrugging a little and finally heaving out a little sigh. "It's true... I can't seem to stop that. It's like I don't want to, but it's..." his cheeks flushed a little and he looked away out the window, mumbling the last part so he could barely even understand it himself, "better than sex really."

Kyo shrugged a little. "So you've got a fetish along with the other. Kaoru... you've got to loosen up, man." He didn't understand why the other was so tense about this sort of thing, but then again, not everyone was as twisted as he was. 

Kaoru looked even more confused for a moment. "Meaning... what? I... like to watch and that's why it's so... arousing? Maybe it's not the other thing?"

Kyo shook his head. "That's not what I meant. To be blunt, you're a gay voyeur. I don't know how else to put it. " 

Kaoru blanched, looking more than a little pained by this revelation. "How do I even deal with this? It's not like... I know how go about this with... men... much less the fact that I'm not okay with it." He put his head in his hands and groaned a little. "Not that I'm any good at this with girls either."

Kyo felt sorry for Kaoru at this point. He glanced at Die then sighed. "Well, you have to admit it to yourself first... but, what's the real reason you're not okay with it? Your parents? Religion? Society? Bad experience?" 

Kaoru blinked a little and then shifted again, uncomfortable. The waitress arrived, saving him from answering for a moment as Kyo and Die's food was placed on the table, she said something and Die nodded. Once she was gone, Die offered softly, "She said yours is coming, sorry it's taking longer."

Kaoru nodded a little and then continued shredding the sugar packet. "I... um... mostly religion, I guess. I've grown up with how it's not right and you'll go to Hell. But... it also makes me really uncomfortable, like the thought of it makes me hard and yet sick. That's not right."

Kyo grabbed his knife and fork and went about cutting up his steak while he listened to Kaoru talk, shaking his head a little. "You're already in hell though... one of your own making." He took a bite and chewed it, swallowing before speaking again. "That part, well... the best way to get over that is to be the top for a while. Get used to being with a man period before you go trying to let someone put their dick up your ass."

Kaoru shifted a little and then looked like he was about ready to excuse himself again. But his food arrived and he settled down again, reaching to pull at his pants under the table, a bit clumsily. He stared at the amount of food and then quietly picked up his fork and went about cutting up his egg and sausage. "How the hell am I supposed to even hit on a guy? It eludes me. What if I do it to the wrong kind of guy? I'll get punched in the face."

Kyo had to laugh at that part, his mind going to Toshiya. "That's the risk you have to take, I suppose... but, if you open your eyes, you'll be able to tell which guys are into guys. Take Rick for example, he's straight as a ruler. It's obvious. Die, though, is the opposite. Obviously into men. It's all about the looks, the actions, their posture, and their reactions to things." 

Kaoru thought about it for a minute and then sighed, just going to eating his food on his plate, a faraway look in his eyes.

Kyo shrugged and went back to his own food, looking over at Die with a questioning look, wondering if he was saying the right thing.

Die spoke up finally once Kyo gave him that look. "Try watching porn first. See which gay porn turns you on. Whatever does it for you there will likely do it for you in real life. Then you'll know going into it if you want to fuck or be fucked. Simple as that."

Kaoru looked a little horrified for a moment, but just nodded a little. After a moment, he quietly admitted, "I like it when men suck each other. And what you were doing that day... outside... I liked that a lot." He shifted again, yanking at his pants.

Kyo caught the motion of Kaoru tugging at his pants this time, smirking a little. "Yeah, I could tell... since you couldn't stop yourself from getting off to it... and since the thought is exciting you even now." 

Kaoru squirmed in his seat and set his fork down, halfway through the food and realizing he wasn't going to manage any more of it. "I... it's been... a while." He made a face and looked out the window again. "Hand only does so much."

Die snorted a little. "So do something about it. Find someone to fuck or suck you off. Whatever floats your fancy. You know... if a guy's looking at your dick in a restroom, they'll usually suck you without a second thought."

Kyo chuckled softly and nodded. "It's true, Die knows from experience and I've had the thought myself... of course, sometimes you need to look at what's right in front of your face." He said this last part with a wink, once again thinking of their bassist. 

Die pulled out his phone and fiddled around with it a bit before putting it down. A moment later, Kaoru's phone vibrated and he pulled it out, opening the message and then gasping. "Die! What the hell?!"

Die laughed softly and smirked. "You said you liked guys sucking dick."

Kyo peered over at Die's phone and smirked at the porn he'd pulled up. "Nice..." 

Kaoru couldn't help it, just letting the video play out, looking at it, no matter how ashamed he was of watching it, it made him achingly hard. "Uggh..." he muttered and finally closed it, pursing his lips a little. "Can you get a box for this? I think I've worn out my welcome in here."

Kyo just nodded and waved at him. "Sure, sure... good luck with... that." He smirked slightly, knowing that Kaoru was going to be furiously jacking off as soon as he was alone. 

Die almost choked on his drink, waving Kaoru off. Once the other was gone, he chuckled and leaned against Kyo. "Well... now that that's out in the open... maybe things will be less terrible."

Kyo nodded, turning to nuzzle Die's neck briefly. "Hopefully... I'm half tempted to text Toshiya and tell him that Kaoru needs a good sucking off." 

Die let out a little chuckle. "On that one... I think let things run their own course at least until Kaoru's more... available to the idea. There's such a thing as moving too fast."

Kyo nodded and picked at his food a bit more before pointing to it. "I think I need a box, too." 

Die flushed a little. "Not me... I'm completely and utterly done." Every last bit of his food was gone, all of it in his belly. "Sometimes I can eat a fucking horse."

 

\--------------------------

 

Kaoru ventured out of the diner and into the bus, making his way rather quickly to his bunk. He kicked off his shoes and glanced around, feeling almost ashamed of what he was about to do, but not knowing what else to do about it. He slipped into his bunk and clumsily opened his pants, pulling out his aching cock and then opening the video on his phone again, his finger accidentally hitting the volume button, the sound of slurping and then a very masculine groan coming out. _Suck my cock, like a good boy. That's fucking right._ Kaoru let out an undignified sound and damn near broke his phone trying to get it to shut up.

Toshiya was lying in his bunk when the sounds of something very obvious pornographic filtered in to him, making his eyes pop open. At first, he thought it was Die and Kyo being blatantly loud about things, but then realized it was a recording and it was coming from Kaoru's bunk. He raised an eyebrow and sat up, listening for more, squirming a bit as he did. Well, that was interesting.

Kaoru lay there, terrified someone had heard him for a long few minutes. Finally, he calmed down enough to restart the video, the sound of a moan coming from his phone again. He cursed and paused it, finding the volume control and turning it back to vibrate, shame welling up inside him. He couldn't even jack off to gay porn properly, it seemed.

Toshiya heard another sound come from Kaoru's bunk and shook his head. How long had the other been jerking off to porn? How many times have they been on tour and he still didn't know to use headphones? The bassist huffed and dug in his bag, pulling out some earbuds and standing up. He didn't bother to say anything as he shoved his hand through the curtain, holding the headphones out so Kaoru could see them. 

Kaoru let out another _very_ undignified sound as a hand came into his bunk. He stared at the hand for a moment, recognizing it to be Toshiya's, and then finally reached for the headphones, allowing himself the temptation of taking the set from his hand, his fingers trailing over the bassist's own. "I'm sorry," he muttered out quietly.

Toshiya let out a nervous chuckle, Kaoru's touch sending a shiver through him. He patted Kaoru where his hand could reach, which happened to be his thigh. "Don't worry. It's just me back here." He moved to pull his hand back and go back to his bunk, having his own issues to take care of now. 

Kaoru let out a soft gasp when the other patted his thigh. It was so close to being his cock and he almost wanted to yank his hand back and put it against his erection. But he instead stared dumbly at the other's retreating fingers and then coughed a little. "I... the volume was an accident... I promise."

Toshiya paused, letting his hand rest on Kaoru's leg, further down this time. He chuckled softly. "I figured as much... it's easy to get flustered and forget to make sure it's down." 

Kaoru stared at that hand, almost desperately wanting to see what it would feel like. But he had no proof the other was gay, no proof he wouldn't start some terrible fight over this. His fingers moved to explore his own dick, imagination allowing him to think of what if it was Toshiya's fingers and not his own.

Toshiya stood there a moment longer. He should have moved away, should have just gone back to his bunk, but instead he stood there like a fool, petting Kaoru's leg, despite knowing the other would probably rather be alone. It didn't matter though, he couldn't make himself pull away, especially after he heard Kaoru shift, the movement of his hand obvious. "Kaoru... I..." he paused and shook his head. No, there was no way the guitarist would accept something like that. "Don't worry about the headphones. I have an extra pair..." With that, he pulled his hand away and returned to his bunk, lying down and squeezing his eyes shut tightly. 

Kaoru's heart beat a little faster, knowing Toshiya wasn't moving away when he figured it was so obvious that he had gone back to touching himself. He squirmed a little and then reached for his hand, missing it by a mere inch. He just looked at where his hand had gone, a sort of dismayed look on his face. After a moment, he heard Toshiya getting back into his bunk and he licked his lips a little, returning to his porn on the phone, this time with the headphones plugged in, one out so he could make sure he wasn't being too loud, the other in so he could hear the sounds these two men were making while they hooked up. The video migrated through the blowjob, Kaoru's hand growing a bit more vigorous on his cock when the one being sucked started to push into the other's mouth, taking control of the whole thing.

Toshiya couldn't stop himself from listening to Kaoru's motions, his own hand soon slipping into his sweat pants to wrap around his own cock, turning to bury his face against the pillow to muffle the moan that slipped out. He knew he could be loud in bed and that tended to be an issue when he was jerking off on the bus. He bucked into his hand, imagining it to be Kaoru instead, ignoring the slight pain that shot through his chest. 

Kaoru got really into it when the guy pulled out of the other's mouth and started to shoot his load all over the one sucking his dick. He groaned a little, humping into his own hand, and then grunting as he came, rolling over to shoot his load all over the wall of his bunk. He had a thing for doing that, finding it dirty and offensive and enjoying that fact. But he'd always clean it later out of respect.

Toshiya couldn't help it. When he heard Kaoru obviously cumming, he jerked himself frantically for a moment then shot his load in his sweat pants, letting a little whimper escape him as he did. 

Kaoru lay there for a moment, panting as the waves of his orgasm died down. He licked his lips a bit and huffed out a quiet sound of content before starting to dig around for tissues to clean up his mess with.

Toshiya, for his part, kept his eyes closed as he tried not to make any more sounds, feeling guilty for having gotten off to Kaoru like that. He always felt that way, but he couldn't help the way the other man made him feel and the situation just then had proved way too much for him. Finally, with a sigh, he shifted and sat up, peeking out of the curtains before slipping out of his bunk to go change out of his soiled pants. 

Kaoru found the tissues he kept for just such an event, pulling them out and wiping the tip of his cock before taking care of the wall. He then shoved them in the small trash bag he kept as well. Putting his dick back in his pants, he zipped up and buckled his belt before picking his phone back up and saving the video rather than just having it as a text from Die. It'd obviously done its job.

Toshiya spent a few moments in the bathroom, washing up and changing before heading back out, pausing by Kaoru's bunk. "...Kaoru?" 

Kaoru pulled out the headphones and wrapped them up. He was just relaxing back when he heard Toshiya's voice. He flushed a little and then coughed. "Yeah?"

Toshiya stood there for a moment, opening his mouth and closing it before clearing his throat. "Erm... I... did they order food for everyone?" He winced, that probably sounded lame as fuck. 

Kaoru lay there for a moment, realizing there was more to this than the question that was actually asked. He rolled out of the bunk and sat up on the edge, peering up at Toshiya. "I think so... and I know that wasn't what you were going to say."

Toshiya almost jumped when Kaoru appeared on the edge of the bunk, his face flushing darkly. He swallowed and shook his head, hair swinging down into his eyes. "It... it's not... nothing... I'm just gonna go get food." He turned to walk away, heart hammering in his chest. 

Kaoru watched him walk off and finally sighed. "Toshiya?" He waited to make sure he had his attention before he offered, "I'm sorry I... you know... where you could hear. It was rude of me." He pushed himself up and headed into the bathroom, closing and locking the door and starting to wash up, feeling like the whole exercise had been futile.

Toshiya opened his mouth to tell Kaoru it was no problem, but just ended up staring at the bathroom door. He felt ridiculously stupid and awkward. He'd never had any issues with relationships or anything, but with Kaoru it was so different. His feelings were beyond physical attraction and it didn't help that he was pretty sure Kaoru would punch him if he told him the truth. He sighed and turned to crawl back into his bunk, not feeling like eating anymore. 

Die stepped onto the bus a few moments later, finding the air full of a tension he hadn't quite expected. He made a little face and then called out. "Toshiya, Shinya, we have food, guys! Nora, you too!"

Kyo followed Die, carrying a couple of bags with the to-go plates in them. He raised an eyebrow at the atmosphere then wrinkled his nose, muttering softly. "The hell went on in here?" 

"I have no idea," Die muttered back before he slid onto the couch and tossed his bag on the table.

After a few moments, Toshiya crawled out of his bunk and wandered out. "Hey... thanks." He dug into one of the bags and pulled out his food, going to sit at the table to eat it, getting out of the way of Shinya and Nora as they came for their food, too. 

Die watched the man and huffed out a little sigh. "So... uh... did we miss some huge argument or something?" he finally asked.

Toshiya looked up and flushed, shaking his head. "Not an argument... I mean... nothing... really." He couldn't exactly explain that he practically listened to Kaoru jerking off to what was obviously gay porn then went and got off on it himself. "Just, uhm... awkward moment."

Die arched an eyebrow and then made a soft, "Hmm..." sound, but left it at that. He assumed maybe it had something to do with Kaoru and the porn he'd sent him, but he didn't ask because that'd probably not help Kaoru on the accepting front.

Toshiya shrugged and dug into his food, not offering any more on the subject, his cheeks colored bright red by now. 

Die grunted a little, dropping it since Toshiya looked a bit on edge. He'd talk later... alone... maybe. If the bassist didn't look ready to freak out.

Kyo just shook his head and turned to look at Die. "Gonna piss quick then get ready for bed..." He headed towards the restroom, almost bumping into Kaoru as he passed through the bunk area. He gave him a look then offered a small smile. "Everything alright?" 

Kaoru gasped when Kyo almost bumped into him, looking a bit wild for a moment and then coughing, looking away, something sheepish in the way he was looking. "Uh... I... guess so?"

Kyo sort of laughed at Kaoru's reaction. "Dude, it's just me, calm down." He slipped past him then glanced back. "I would ask, but I think I can guess... the video _was_ pretty hot, hm?" 

"Yeah..." he sighed and pushed a hand through his unruly hair. "I apparently need to learn how to use headphones. Go me." He made a face.

Kyo blinked then held back another laugh. "Oh man, so that's why Toshiya's acting all flustered. He heard you..." He slapped Kaoru on the shoulder and shook his head. "Yeah, headphones are a must on the bus... and always make sure they're plugged in. I usually do a test with music first." 

Kaoru grew a little red. "Yeah... yeah... he did. And he gave me his headphones." He looked a little ashamed. "I try to go and accept something and I fuck it up like that."

Kyo licked his lip and shook his head. "Don't worry about it. Toshiya's not exactly straight... though you didn't hear that from me." 

The guitarist at least had the ability to keep his mouth shut on that, flushing a bit and grunting. "Ah... well... I see. I guess that means he didn't... mind."

Kyo shrugged. "It was probably awkward..." He stood there for a moment then nodded towards the bathroom. "Don't worry about it, yeah?" He moved on into the bathroom, taking care of business.

Kaoru made a little face and nodded, shrugging just after, wandering back off toward the bunks. "Will try not to."

Die cleared his throat a little and noticing Kyo and Kaoru were both away from them, he reached to touch Toshiya's hand. "Hey... what happened?"

Toshiya jumped about a mile when Die touched him then looked around before hanging his head, blushing. "Kaoru uhm... he forgot headphones while he was watching porn. It was obviously gay porn... and I knew he was... you know, getting off on it." He huffed and wiped his hand over his face. "It... I couldn't help... getting aroused... and I think he knew."

Die quirked an eyebrow at him and then chuckled a little. "Yeah, it was... I gave it to him." He pulled up the video on his phone, making sure it was on mute before pushing it toward Toshiya. "But... even if he did hear you, why would it matter? You heard him."

Toshiya looked at the video, his cheeks flushing again. "Oh, wow..." He handed Die his phone back then shrugged. "Well, it would have been fine if I hadn't acted stupid and felt up his leg after I offered him some headphones." 

Die let out a laugh and took his phone back. "Did you now?" He licked his lips a little and leaned forward. "And how did he react to that?"

Toshiya shrugged a bit. "I'm not sure... he didn't freak out and tell me to fuck off... he just kinda laid there." 

"Well, I'd say that's not a negative reaction." Die shrugged a little. "So honestly, don't worry about it. Kaoru's negative reactions are... very negative."

Toshiya sighed softly and nodded, nibbling his food. "I guess... but... it was damn awkward."

Die made a soft little sound and shrugged slightly. "I think it's fine. He'd have freaked out if he didn't like it at all. But we had a talk with him and... I think he's trying to accept that side of himself. He'll probably lash out a few more times, but..." he shrugged again.

Toshiya blinked. "You actually... talked to him about it? He admitted it?" He was shocked honestly because he was pretty sure their guitarist would have kicked someone's ass before admitting it. 

Die gave a little nod. "Yeah... I think he's still a bit panicked, but... we'll see if we can't get him to be a bit more agreeable in the future."

Toshiya laughed a little. "I was freaked out when I realized. I mean, you know, you're raised to believe that girls are who you're supposed to be with then suddenly you're into dudes and it's weird." 

Die huffed out a breath. "Believe me... I know. Everyone else knew about me before I knew about myself." He flipped through his phone, finding a picture of Kyo's dick and smirking a bit, knowing it was his secret that it was Kyo's. He flicked through, finding a picture of his own and arching an eyebrow. That wasn't a bad picture, actually. He selected to send it to Kyo and then looked back up at Toshiya.

Toshiya sighed and shrugged, toying with his hair. "Yeah, well it was kind of obvious with you, even when you didn't know it." He smiled a bit then raised an eyebrow. "Dude... are you looking at porn?"

Die cleared his throat and bit a little on his tongue before smirking. "Did you see it?"

Toshiya shook his head. "No but I could see the perverted look on your face."

"Ah well... just as well, unless you really want to know what my cock looks like." He let out a laugh and glanced out the bus window, seeing a road sign flash by, but not catching what it said, only that the top number was 113.

Toshiya wrinkled his nose slightly, a grin spreading on his face. "I've seen your cock so, no thanks." He was feeling more relaxed now and started nibbling at his sandwich again, shifting around to prop his feet up on the chair in front of him. "This tour has been full of surprises already and we've only gotten started..." 

"Dude! When the hell did you see my dick?" Die completely ignored the second part of Toshiya's statement in favor of the first, his cheeks actually taking on a slightly red hue in the process.

Toshiya laughed, waving his hand. "Chill, it's not like I was creeping on you or something. You were drunk as hell one night and took it out in front of me in an alley to piss." He shrugged. 

"Hey, that does not count. It's much better hard." He gave Toshiya a lewd sort of wink and then laughed. "If you're not careful, I'll have to prove it."

Toshiya snorted. "Yeah, yeah, well I would say mine is bigger and better, but then I'd have to prove it to you and I already blew my load for the night." He snickered then glanced towards the hallway before leaning forward, speaking lowly. "So, is Kyo's as glorious as it looks pressed against those track pants of his?" 

Die almost burst out laughing. He debated showing Toshiya the picture of Kyo's dick, but he decided Kyo might well kill him. Instead, he satisfied himself with holding out his fingers to show how long and then his hand like he was gripping the shaft to show how big around. His smirk was absolutely shit-eating the entire time.

Toshiya sort of gaped at Die's actions, a look of envy on his face for both Kyo's size and the fact that Die got to take it. "Damn... dude... I'm surprised you can walk." 

Die let out a laugh. "Mmm... some days, me too." He sat back and studied the other. "Should I be concerned you want to know his size and not mine?" He arched his eyebrow and gave Toshiya a stern look.

Toshiya snorted and waved his hand. "Nah, just pure curiosity on that front... I mean, I know you've seen him get hard on stage. Who wouldn't be curious?" 

Die snorted. "If only the fans knew that all their fantasies are probably underdoing it." He glanced toward the back of the bus. "Shit... let's stop talking about his dick or else the whole bus will get some insight as to what exactly I enjoy doing with it."

Toshiya let out a goofy laugh then nodded slightly. "Yeah, probably a good idea." He sat back and glanced out the window, wondering where they were. 

"Mmm... well... thanks for that." He laughed a bit and shook his head. "Now I can't stop thinking about it." He glanced at Toshiya and then away again. "Do you find yourself thinking about you-know-who’s cock all the time? What it looks like, how it would taste?"

Toshiya blinked then ducked his head, blushing a bit. "Sometimes... especially how it would taste. I sort of have a thing for blowjobs." He licked his lips and fidgeted with a napkin. Why he was nervous about this topic, he didn't know. He supposed it was because they were talking about Kaoru instead of just random people. 

"Me, too. Ever since I figured out I was into guys, fuck... man... I just want to suck cock all the damn time." Die smirked a little and leaned forward. "Have you ever?"

Toshiya huffed out a soft laugh then nodded. "A few times... random dudes in bars." 

Die shifted a little, starting to feel aroused by the topic at hand. He cleared his throat and then crossed his legs in a slightly different way, drumming his fingers on the table top, searching his mind for another subject. "I uh... I think we've been to the venue we're going to before. Haven't we?"

Toshiya gave Die an odd look then one of realization before reaching up to run his fingers through his hair, having been fighting off squirming himself. "Ah, yeah, I believe so. This will be the third time there, I think."

Die let out a little hum and licked his lips, still thinking about sucking cock rather than the venue. He coughed a little and then just shook his head and laughed. "Okay, obviously I just can't learn to shut up when I need to."

The bassist laughed softly. "Well, if you want to go cure your craving, I wouldn't mind. I'll just sit here and play with Shinya's iPad or something." 

"I uh... well..." he arched an eyebrow at Toshiya, "do you have an aversion to watching people?"

Toshiya hesitated for a moment, then shook his head. "No, I like watching. I mean, it's kind of hot. Why?" 

Die felt his cheeks flush ever so slightly. "Well... honestly? I get off on it. I love people watching me..."

Toshiya shifted a bit in his seat, licking his lips. "Yeah? Like, just full out... ogling you while you go at it?"

Die felt a thrill shoot through his body and he glanced toward the direction Kyo had gone. "Yeah..." He picked up his phone and sent off a quick text. _'Gonna jerk off. I made myself horny. And... so not leaving the table to do it.'_ He sent it off then put his phone down, reaching to grope himself through his pants, uncrossing his legs and spreading them a bit. He knew Toshiya couldn't see him just yet, but he was definitely already getting off on this, his heart thudding in his chest. Part of him just hoped Kyo would come indulge him a little as well.

Kyo had gotten caught up reading when Die texted him. He pulled his phone out and read the message with a raised eyebrow. A slow smirk spread on his face as he realized just what that implied and shot one back off to Die. _'Gonna get off to Toshi watching you?'_

Toshiya watched Die, seeing his hand disappear under the table. He drew his bottom lip between his teeth, eyes bright with building excitement. He wondered how long he could watch without touching himself. 

Die picked up his phone again when it made a little sound. _'Damn fucking right.'_ He glanced up at Toshiya and licked his lips a little, hips arching into his own touch. It made it so much better when someone was watching. He shuddered a little and moved both hands to undo his belt and then his pants, pushing his pants down a bit so he had a full range of access to himself.

Kyo looked at the last message, chuckling lowly and reaching down to grope himself, already growing hard from the thought of Die indulging in one of his fantasies. _'Don't cum without me.'_ He'd go out there in a few minutes, join the fun. 

Toshiya almost groaned when Die undid his pants, knowing that he was exposed now. "Do you ever use toys?" he questioned in a barely audible tone. 

Die smirked at the text, just glancing at it. His eyes slid up to Toshiya as he started to slowly stroke his cock under the table. "Yeah... I do. But Kyo's so much better than any toy I've ever used." He winked and then ran his thumb over the head of his cock, grunting quietly at the feeling. His hips bucked a little and he shifted back in his seat so Toshiya could see at least part of his dick if he wanted to, his hand slowly working his stiff length.

Toshiya found himself leaning forward slightly, eyes taking in Die's cock once he could see it, his hand rubbing over his own thigh. "I... I bet." He finally indulged himself, placing his hand over his crotch and pressing, biting back a moan. He was mostly hard already. 

"So you do care what my cock looks like," Die breathed out, a wicked sparkle in his eyes as he watched Toshiya lean forward to take it all in. He jerked himself a bit harshly for a moment, his own eyes trailing over the bassist's body. "Is it making you horny yet, watching me when you know I'm going to do this right here, right in front of you until I cum?"

Toshiya's cheeks heated up a bit, but he didn’t deny it. He grunted softly, his hand flexing on his dick. "Yes... s'fucking hot." He finally sat back some and unzipped his own pants, reaching in to stroke over his cock. He was about to pull it out when a sound made him freeze. He looked up to see Kyo coming from the back then looked at Die, just the slightest bit worried. 

Die eagerly watched Toshiya put his hand into his pants to take out his cock, enjoying seeing someone else getting off to him doing this. He glanced up at the sound as well and just smirked at Kyo. "Hey," he purred out, letting go of his cock long enough to scoot over just a bit for Kyo to sit if he wanted.

Kyo slipped into the area where Die and Toshiya were, greeted with the sight of his lover's cock on display and Toshiya's about to be. He chuckled softly at the look on the bassist's face. "Believe me Totchi, he wouldn't be doing this if I wasn't okay with it." He leaned down to capture Die's lips in a possessive kiss and then sat next to him, his hand slipping out to stroke over his thigh. 

Toshiya let out a breath then nodded slightly, pulling his cock free and giving it a couple of strokes before breathing out. "Go on..."

Die smirked a little and reached for Kyo's hand, taking it in his own and pressing it over his cock, slowly starting to stroke his dick with it. "Hnnggg..." his head tilted back and his hips shoved up, "much better."

Kyo smirked and took over stroking Die off, his eyes focused on Toshiya as he did so. He shifted and made a show of it, sliding his hand from base to tip of Die's dick then swiping his thumb over the head slowly, smearing a bit of pre-cum around. 

Toshiya couldn't and didn't want to look away from the display his two bandmates were putting on. It was so fucking erotic seeing them together. He resorted to full out stroking himself, hips bucking up a bit as he did. 

Die started to just let it all out, one hand moving to lightly rub at his nipple, the other reaching into Kyo's pants and stroking him there, feeling him already hard. That only made him even more aroused, his heart thudding in his chest. "Show us, Toshiya. Don't hide it. You're so fucking horny, you just want to cum. don't you?"

Kyo grunted as Die touched him, bucking into his hand for a moment before pulling back and pushing his pants down, revealing his cock with a smirk, pulling it up to show Toshiya its full length. "Show Toshiya how well you suck cock, baby." 

Toshiya couldn't help but moan at both Die's words and the sight of Kyo's cock. It was definitely magnificent and he found himself licking his lips at the thought of sucking it. He shifted back a bit, spreading his legs as he stroked himself harder. 

Die took in the sight of Toshiya's length, watching the way he stroked himself, filing the information away in the back of his mind. But he was immediately distracted by Kyo telling him to show the bassist how well he sucked dick. He groaned, giving up on the table being down. He tossed his phone into the seat, grabbing Toshiya's leftovers and putting them on the seat. He pushed the table up, putting it up in the wall bracket before he sank to his knees on the floor between Kyo's legs and took his dick in his mouth, not even hesitating to start right in on deep-throating him, lewd groans coming from his throat as he took back over stroking his own cock.

Kyo waited for Die to put the table up then reached forward and tangled his hand in his hair, tugging a bit harshly as Die started sucking him with that talented mouth. His eyes swept over to Toshiya, smirking slightly at the look on his face. "Fuck yes, Die... suck my cock... so good."

Toshiya brought his hand up to cover his mouth as he moaned again, louder this time as his hand moved a bit frantically over his cock. The scene before him was like something out of his fantasies and he knew that this wouldn't be the first time he got off on it... just the first time it'd be real.

Die let out a louder groan as Kyo got a bit rough with him. God how he wanted to fuck. He shuddered a little, pulling up off Kyo's dick and hissing out, "Want my fucking dick in your ass so fucking bad," before he went back down on Kyo, making a total scene out of it, his belt clanking as he jerked off furiously.

Kyo smirked and bucked his hips, pushing his cock down Die's throat, groaning lowly. "You'd let me fuck you right here, wouldn't you? Right here in front of Toshiya..." His voice had taken on a deep growling tone, his cock throbbing. 

Toshiya shifted forward, dragging his free hand through his own hair as his hand moved in a blur, his hips bucking up into it. He wouldn't last much longer, this was making him so damn horny.

Die let out a whine around Kyo's cock, bobbing his head diligently, wanting the other to cum so he could taste it. He wanted to see Toshiya cum and, from the sound of it, the other was getting damn close already. He stopped jacking himself off for a moment, wanting to do it where both men could see him lose it when he did cum.

Kyo groaned lowly and tugged Die's hair again, just a bit harshly. He reached down and raked his nails over his lower abdomen, his cock jumping slightly in Die's mouth. "Gettin' close baby." 

Toshiya had to make himself back off his dick some. He didn't want to cum just yet, wanting to see Kyo fill Die's mouth and see Die spill. He settled for stroking himself slower, shivering a bit. 

Die started moaning around the other's cock, using his free hand to reach up and scratch lightly over Kyo's chest, under his shirt. He looked up into the vocalist's face, his cheeks flushed.

Kyo stared down into Die's eyes, giving a soft moan then letting his head drop back as he bucked his hips a few more times before cumming with a moan. "Hnng Die..." 

Die let out a loud moan as the other spurted down his throat. He grunted and swallowed it all but the very last dribble, pulling back and letting that get on his lips. Pulling back from Kyo, he turned and slumped back against the seat, still kneeling in the floor, legs spread. He licked the cum from his lips and started to really go at himself, pumping his cock a bit harshly. "Oh yeah, oh fuck yeah... I'm gunna blow it all over the fucking floor. Fuck!"

Toshiya watched the display between the two of them moaning at the dribble of cum on Die's lips. He only had to stroke himself a few more times before letting out a soft cry and cumming, his jizz hitting the floor near Die. "Oh... God... _yes_!" 

Kyo collapsed onto the seat next to Die, reaching out to drag a nail over his neck and collarbone. "Mm that's it baby, cum for us... show Toshiya how fucking sexy you are when you lose it." 

Die couldn't take it anymore, the moment the other started to cum, his load splattering the floor near his knee, he lost it. His own cum spurted out over the floor, hitting the bench opposite him in rather large quantities. "Oh shit... o-oh shit!" His hips jerked and he arched, head falling back as he emptied himself out all over the floor of the bus.

Toshiya watched Die cum, his hand still stroking his own dick, a shudder going through him. "Fuck Die..." This was, by far, the most erotic thing he'd ever seen. 

Kyo smirked, threading his fingers through Die's hair once he was finished, eyes sweeping over the mess he'd made. "You'd think you hadn't cum in months." 

Die leaned back, panting as he finished cumming. He knew it was dirty and oh so wrong, but he couldn't help it, he pushed just a little and a few tiny dribbles of piss slid down his dick, unnoticeable unless someone was looking for it. He licked his lips a little and slid his hand over his dick before looking back up at Kyo.

Kyo had been watching Die and noted the dribble of fluid that was not cum, a dirty smirk on his face as he met Die's eyes. 

Toshiya flopped back against the seat, eyes closed and breathing finally slowing back to normal. "Ah... better than any porn." He chuckled. "Thanks guys."

Die chuckled a little, still staring up at Kyo. "Yeah... it definitely is." He held out his hand. "Give me that box of tissues so I can clean up this mess while I'm down here?"

Kyo let out a little laugh himself then reached and grabbed the tissues for Die, taking one to wipe the head of his dick off before tucking himself away. "Yep... always better to watch in person." 

Toshiya cracked an eye open and glanced at his mess on the floor mingled with Die's. He felt a bit guilty letting Die clean it up by himself, so he tucked himself away then slid off the seat carefully and grabbed some tissues, mopping up what was on his side. 

Die reached for the tissues and started mopping up his side of the floor and whatnot, glancing at Toshiya and smirking a little. "So... now you know why I like it so much." He laughed softly and used another tissue to clean himself up, tucking his dick back in his pants, but not bothering to do them up again just yet.  
Toshiya snorted and nodded, feeling suddenly drained after blowing his second load of the night. "Yeah... damn..." He let out a little laugh and dragged his fingers through his hair, glancing up at Kyo. "Thanks for the show." 

Kyo idly reached out and petted Die's head, smirking at Toshiya. "My pleasure... literally." He glanced down at Die and grinned. 

Die chuckled softly and leaned back into Kyo's touch with a quiet purr. "Thanks... for indulging me. I guess Shinya's the only one who hasn't seen me mid-fuck now." He let out a little snort and wiped his hand over the back of his mouth.

Toshiya chuckled. "I'm not sure if it would turn him on or scar him for life!" He made sure his clothing was arranged and stood up, stretching then stepping over to grab a bottle of water, taking a large gulp of it. 

Die chuckled. "Probably both." He pulled himself up from the floor and settled in next to Kyo, putting the table back where it belonged, squirming a little to get comfortable. He leaned toward his lover.

Kyo shrugged as he wrapped his arm around Die's shoulders, pulling him close and letting out a little yawn. "I think I'll try to spare him the 'horror' of seeing us go at it. I'd like this trip to be smooth sailing from now on." 

Die nodded a little. "It'd certainly be nice." He shifted again, taking Kyo's hand under the table and subtly moving it over his crotch, not having zipped up yet. He had unleashed a horrible desire by doing what he had and it was eating at him not to be doing anything more about it.

Kyo nodded in agreement, keeping his face completely passive as he felt Die move his hand, having to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smirking. He cupped Die's length, moving his hand ever so slightly. 

Toshiya for his part was halfway falling asleep as he stood there drinking his water and looking out the window, squinting at sign that had a picture of a deer on it. "Must be lots of them around or something." 

Die almost wanted to scream at Toshiya to leave them alone, but he didn't want to get into it with him over something stupid. Instead, he tried to look interested in the deer sign. "Uh... yeah... lots of... deer." He could feel that ache starting to burn low in his stomach and he knew he was going to have to go soon, no matter who was around. Starting and then not finishing was definitely not his strong suit.

Kyo coughed and looked at Toshiya, raising an eyebrow. "Toshiya, you're going to fall over or something. Go to bed..." It was the nicest way he could put it and he hoped the bassist got it and left soon. 

Toshiya blinked then looked at Kyo and Die before yawning widely and giving them a sheepish look. "Yeah, okay. You're right." He tossed the now empty water bottle then turned and headed towards the back, tossing a, "G'night," over his shoulder. 

Die lifted one hand in a wave to the other. The moment he was gone, he managed to grit out from under his breath. "Bottle. Now."

Kyo chuckled lowly and got up, finding an empty bottle and handing it to Die. "Wait too long, baby?" 

Die grabbed the bottle once Kyo came back with it, taking off the lid and pulling out his dick. He pressed the head of his cock to the bottle top and started to piss, the sound of it sending tingles up his body. "Ah... oh god," he groaned out, obviously enjoying himself, though not answering Kyo outright.

Kyo watched his lover start filling the bottle, smirking. "You know, I think you're the only person that has ever made pissing erotic." He was referring to Die's reactions to it rather than the action itself. 

Die filled the bottle damn near to the top before he finished, the last few spurts squirting out into the bottle a bit loudly. Finished, he capped the bottle and put it on the seat between them, shaking the last few drops off onto the floor and then stroking himself for Kyo's benefit. "Mmm... that's because it feels amazing. Next time you piss, just... feel it."

Kyo chuckled and leaned over to kiss the side of Die's mouth once the other was finished. "Honestly, I've thought about it... and of course a post jizz piss feels like a whole other orgasm."

Die put his dick away and did up his pants. He reached to touch Kyo's thigh, smoothing his hand over the fabric. "It does. No man can deny that." He glanced up as Shinya passed through the area, smirking a bit at them, but keeping right on walking without a word. Die glanced down at the bottle and hoped it would pass as Gatorade or something like that.

Kyo sighed softly at Die's touch, looking up at Shinya as he walked past, raising an eyebrow at the smirk on his face. He just shook his head and shifted closer to Die, obscuring the bottle from view. 

Die gave Kyo a grateful little look when the other moved to hide his piss bottle from view. He didn't want to have to explain that when the bathroom wasn't occupied or broken. He leaned back on the seat and closed his eyes, content to just rub at Kyo's thigh.

Kyo turned and nuzzled into Die's neck, kissing lightly. He was happy that they didn't have to hide their relationship now even if they did have to hide some kinks. Overall, it was just a nice feeling to be able to carry on a relationship without the hidden factor in every single respect.

With that thought in mind, Kyo rose from his seat and held out a hand to Die. “Nap?” After all, none of them kept regular schedules on the bus.

Die grinned, fastening up his pants and then picking up the bottle to dispose of in the trash, grasping Kyo’s hand and puling himself up. “Nap,” he agreed quietly, padding after the vocalist, a pleased smirk on his face.

**To Be Continued...**


	12. Chapter 12

The last notes of the song filtered through the venue followed by inhuman growls that turned into moans and cries, sounds that might seem tortured to most people, but they held an entirely different meaning tonight. Kyo's body bent and twisted to an invisible beat, motions fluid and seemingly never ending. He could feel himself growing aroused, the material of the track pants he chose to wear that night tenting out as he became fully hard. He let out another cry then stepped off the riser, eyes sliding to his left, barely hiding the heat in them. 

Kyo waved to the audience and headed off stage, hovering just on the other side to watch Die's display, his body dripping with sweat and shuddering slightly with that buzz that came from pouring himself into the music and feeling the heady energy from the audience and the rest of the band. 

Die had been watching Kyo most of the show. When he'd change places on the stage, he'd watch the other. He couldn't help it. Kyo was amazing in all that he did and the way he moved and sang. And it all hit him close to home. The other was absolutely on fire tonight and it encouraged Die to give the show of his life as well. When the last notes of Kyo's cries faded away, Die found himself lost in his own world of his guitar. For the first time in years, he found himself on his knees, playing the hell out of it in some 'big rock ending' style thing that just came solely from the heart. He knew Kaoru might have a hernia, but he didn't give a flying fuck right then. He cut off the last note and ripped the strap of his guitar from his chest, putting it aside and looking out toward the audience, screaming at them rather violently before he chucked out a few picks and stood up, grabbing a bottle of water and dumping it directly on a few people in the front row. He threw both middle fingers up at them before he whirled around and headed off stage, his heart beating frantically in his chest.

There was another energy thrumming through Kyo that night and as soon as Die rounded the corner, Kyo sprung on him, shoving him against the nearest wall. He didn't say anything, didn't need words, as he pressed against Die's body, nails digging into the other's shoulders. 

Die let out a soft gasp as Kyo pinned him to the wall, his hips instantly pushing toward the other as the other pretty much attacked him. "Oh god," he hissed out, feeling how hard Kyo was. This was the shit his fantasies had been made of for so long he didn't even know how to react properly to it. He just felt like he was going to jizz himself in no time flat if the next thing Kyo demanded of him was a blowjob.

Kyo groaned lowly as he rocked his hips against Die's for a moment then he pulled away, glancing around them. No one was coming near their little corner, most likely thanks to Nora shooing them away and that was fine with him. He looked up at Die and licked his lips. "Suck my dick, now." he demanded hoarsely, reaching down and pushing his pants out of the way, freeing his achingly hard cock. 

Die's face literally contorted into a look that sincerely meant he was about to fucking cum in his jeans. "Oh god," he repeated as he sank to the floor on his knees. He didn't even hesitate, just leaning in and taking Kyo's cock in his mouth, starting to suck the rigid length. The feel of it on his tongue made him groan, despite the stage sweat taste, which wasn't so pleasant. This was his fantasy and he was living it and he'd be damned if he gave a fuck what Kyo tasted like right then. His fingers fumbled with his belt, opening his pants and freeing his dick so he could get fully hard without the confines of such a tight area restricting him.

Kyo smirked slightly at Die's reaction, dropping his hand to thread through damp hair. He let out a soft moan as Die's mouth wrapped around him, sending jolts of pleasure up his spine. His head dropped back against the wall, his hips jerking a bit. "God, yes!" 

Die's hands pushed up over the damp fabric of Kyo's pants, his fingers digging a bit as he gave him very enthusiastic head. He sucked and moaned and bobbed his head, not being quiet or neat about it in any respect. He was drooling a little down his chin and his eyes had a wild look to them.

Kyo had to open his eyes and look down at Die, groaning at the enthusiastic display he was giving. He could already feel himself close to cumming. "Fuck Die... that's it... suck my cock." 

Die didn't stop, not for a moment. His jaw hurt but he wasn't about to give it up, not in the least. He reached around to clutch at Kyo's ass like he'd done so many times in his fantasies. He was rock hard, his cock jutting out of his pants, obvious as all hell.

Kyo groaned and bucked his hips, shuddering. Another second and he was losing it, moaning out Die's name as he came hard down his throat. 

Die grunted as Kyo filled his mouth with cum. He shuddered a bit and pulled back once he needed air so much he couldn't take it anymore. He sniffed a little and wiped the drool from his chin, looking a bit embarrassed at how into it he'd been. He just knelt there, his back and head against the wall, hips jutting out, dick hanging out of his pants. He was sure he made quite the sight.

Kyo slumped against the wall, panting harshly as he stared down at Die, his cum painting his lips, mixing with the drool on his chin. He took in the fact that his lover's cock was on display and quite hard and smirked, reaching down to pet Die's hair. 

Die tilted his head toward Kyo's hand and he choked out a little laugh. "Wow..." he chuckled again, "dude, I've had fantasies that went exactly like that." He wiped his lips again and then licked them, wiping the excess on his pants.

Kyo snorted and shook his head. "You don't know how many times I've wanted to just shove you against the nearest wall and fuck the hell out of you after a show." He glanced down at Die again, his eyes still full of primal lust. 

Die sat there panting for a few minutes before he finally decided he needed to get the hell up. He pushed himself upright and struggled to get his dick back in his pants, finally managing it. He buttoned up and groped himself real well once before he cleared his throat. "Need something to drink," he murmured.

Kyo hummed and grabbed Die by the hips, pulling him close and kissing him deeply, reaching down to grope him before letting go. "Yeah... me too." He pushed away from the wall and wandered slightly unsteadily towards the catering area.

Die groaned into the kiss, his hips jerking. He wanted so much more, wanted to have the hell fucked out of him while he screamed loud enough for everyone to know. But he was a bit uncertain what he was and wasn't welcome to do right then. He shuddered a little and followed after Kyo. He whined a little as his dick brushed the inside of his pants in the most uncomfortable sort of way.

Kyo glanced back as Die whined, a smirk playing on his lips. He knew he was still hard as well and probably in need of release. He'd be glad to take care of that of course, but he figured Die knew that already. They finally reached the table set up with drinks and located his hot tea, pouring himself a cup and taking a small sip. "You're still hard..." 

Die grabbed a bottle of water, being a good boy and downing about half the lukewarm bottle. He set it back down and shivered a bit. "I... yeah... I know. Trust me, I fucking know." He groaned a little and then looked around, seeing the couch in the corner. It was huge and leather and cooshy looking. "Fuck me," he pretty much demanded, heading to the couch, already undoing his pants.

Kyo smirked and followed Die's gaze to the couch. He took another drink of his tea then licked his lips, groaning faintly. "Gladly..." He moved to follow Die to the couch, catching him around the waist once they were close to it, his hands dipping down into Die's pants, brushing over his length. He could already feel himself getting hard again, still wound up from the show and just Die in general. 

Die had just got his pants undone when Kyo's hand invaded them. He let out a loud moan, not bothering to hide it. He didn't give a fuck right then who heard or really anything at all. He just needed Kyo like he needed air to breathe. He dug in his pockets and shoved a condom and tiny pillow of lube in the other's spare hand.

Kyo ground his hips against Die's ass for a moment then took the condom and lube, stepping back slightly to push his own pants down and out of the way. He reached down and quickly stroked himself to full hardness then slipped on the condom with a groan. Once the condom was in place, he pushed Die's pants the rest of the way down, squeezing his ass roughly.

Die allowed Kyo to rough him up, pushing him around. He slid onto the seat, perching in just such a way the vocalist could stand behind him and have about the right height to stick it to him real well. He leaned into the back of the seat, groaning faintly.

Kyo gazed down at Die as he opened the lube, squirting it into his palm and smearing it over his cock before reaching out and smearing it over Die's entrance, pushing one finger in. Of course, he was impatient and wanted to hurry but didn’t want to hurt him.

Die whined a little as Kyo pushed his finger into him. Not that he wasn't grateful for the thought, but he wanted to get on with the main event. He'd been wanting Kyo's cock in him for the whole friggin’ tour and now he was getting it and he wanted it _now_.

Kyo groaned as he wriggled his finger inside Die before adding a second, scissoring and spreading them open. It wasn't long before he grew impatient and pulled his hand back, grasping Die's hips instead, positioning himself at his entrance. With a quick push, he slipped into Die's body, moaning lowly. "Oh... God."

Die shivered a little, pushing back into the other's touch. Once the other shoved into him, he cried out, burying his face into the back of the couch. That was much better... his arousal was getting the needed attention and he knew he was eventually going to orgasm, which made him really damn happy right then.

Kyo waited just a moment then started thrusting into Die, using his hips to pull him back. The risk and the noises Die was making only fueled his desire. He smirked as he brought one hand down over Die's ass. 

Die started to cry out even louder, heedless of what was going on. He reached down under him, jerking off his cock almost frantically as Kyo fucked the shit out of him. "Kyo," he hissed out, shuddering.

Kyo moaned breathlessly, slamming into Die roughly, reaching out to drag his nails down his lover's spine. "Fuck Die... yes!" He grasped Die's hip, using it for leverage, pushing in deeper. 

It wasn't even a minute later before the guitarist started to cum. He let it splash out over the couch, knowing he'd clean it when they were done. He let out a loud moan the moment he started to cum, his body spasming from the force of it. "Oh _fuck_!"

Kyo moaned and shuddered as he felt Die clenching around him with his orgasm. He grabbed Die's hips and fucked him hard for a moment before crying out and tumbling over the edge as well, filling the latex barrier between them. 

Die just lay there, panting quietly as he found himself on the come-down from sex. He licked his lips a little and chuckled. "God, I needed that. So fucking much."

Kyo leaned over Die's back, kissing his shoulder softly and letting out a laugh. "Mhm... me too." He stayed there for a moment before moving back and pulling out of Die, quickly getting rid of the condom then flopping on the couch with a huff, exhausted by now. 

Die shivered a little when the other pulled out. He moved enough to grab some tissues, mopping up the mess on the couch and then reaching to wipe his ass a bit. He tossed the tissues down and flopped over next to Kyo. "Mmm... I won't be walking right again for a while," he murmured, smirking toward the other.

Kyo gave Die a smirk, reaching over to run his hand over his thigh. "I apologize...' He leaned over and kissed Die's cheek. "Damn... I don't think I can move."

Die chuckled at Kyo's apology. "Mmm... don't worry about it. I enjoy it."

After a few moments, Kyo turned to look at Die, smiling. "I fucking love you."

Die shifted, doing up his pants and then smirked at the other. "Mmm... I love you, too. And this... this was amazing."

Kyo smiled, totally happy at the moment. "Very... why haven't we done this before?" 

"I think because we have issues admitting our fantasies?" The guitarist shrugged a little and licked his lips.

Kyo shrugged and leaned in for a soft kiss then stood up, stretching and cracking his back. "Think anyone saw or heard us?

"Kuroo probably... he always comes to check on me after each show. But he knows enough to keep himself away from me if I'm... busy." He gave the other a little smirk. 

Kyo raised an eyebrow then laughed. "I see... Nora just usually leaves me on the floor... checks if I'm breathing.”

"Mmm... well... Kuroo tends to find the flaws and lets me know so I can work on them the next show... apologizes for anything he does that fucks up my show." He shifted closer to Kyo and leaned on him slightly. "I like doing this right after the show. It tires me out and makes me feel even more amazing. I think I could sleep better like this."

Kyo nodded, knowing the techs' work and appreciating it of course. "Mm, me too, baby... just wanna curl up in your arms now and sleep for the night." 

"We should go back to the bus, eat our dinner, and then go for it." Die smiled and pushed himself back up. "There are burgers waiting on us. They say they're whiskey barbeque."

Kyo licked his lips and was about to say he wasn't hungry when his stomach gave a loud grumble. He laughed and shook his head, patting it. "Sounds delicious." He stood up and wrapped his arms around Die, holding him for a few moments.

Die pulled him close and kissed him gently. After a moment, he chuckled and kissed his forehead. "God, people should be glad I clean my fucking jizz up with as many places as it has been shot over the past week." He laughed a little and shook his head.

Kyo snorted and patted Die's shoulder, moving towards the exit. "Especially with the amounts you manage." He grinned then headed towards the exit. 

"Hey... some people think it's good to be able to fucking jizz like I do." He chuckled a little and headed off after him. "Mmm... come on. That burger is calling my fucking name hardcore." 

Kyo laughed softly and walking down the hall. "To be honest, I like it..." He smirked, then peeked out the doors, thankful to see that most of the fans had left. He ducked his head and darted to the bus, huffing once he was safely on it. 

Die headed after Kyo to the bus, looking pleased with himself. Once they were on, he smiled and settled down at the table, grabbing the burger with his name on it. He pulled it out and groaned as he looked in the box. "Oh my fucking god. There's an onion ring on the burger, this... is amazing."

Kyo plopped down next to Die, not being shy about sitting a little too close to him as he grabbed his own burger. He chuckled softly and plucked the onion ring off of his own and set it in Die's box. "Here, you can have mine." 

Die took it and stuffed it in his burger as well before taking a huge bite of it. He let out a moan that was rather like the one he'd just made a few minutes earlier for a whole other reason. He began taking huge bites, scarfing it down quickly.

Kyo went at his food a lot more delicately, taking small bites and enjoying it though his energy level was fading fast. He did let out an mmm and called a, "Thank you," to Nora as she wandered past at some point. When he was about two thirds through his burger he set it down and huffed. "Full..." 

Die finished off the entire burger and the pile of fries next to it. He groaned as he settled back, patting his full stomach. "Oh lord that was fucking good," he muttered before letting out a burp. He licked his lips a little and then stood up, pulling up his shirt a little and staring down at his little tummy. "Mmm... very good apparently."

Kyo chuckled, stealing a couple of fries then reaching out to poke the food baby in Die's stomach. "Very nice. I think it’s twins!" 

"Yeah, burger and fries. Not identical I'm afraid." He laughed and shook his head. He put his shirt back down and padded off toward the bunks, crooking one finger toward the other. "C'mon."

"That's alright, they'll look the same anyway." He snorted then stood, gladly following Die. Once they were in the bunk area, he stopped and whispered. "Gotta piss..." 

Die sat to take off his shoes, but he glanced up the moment Kyo told him what he needed to do. He popped up off the bed and herded Kyo into the bathroom. He closed the door behind them and pushed Kyo's hands away so he could do everything himself. He moved his pants away and then held his cock, murmuring, "Okay... go ahead."

Kyo fussed for a moment as Die pushed his hands away then just let him do what he wanted, groaning faintly. He shifted a bit then started going, finding that he had quite a bit to let go, eventually leaning his back against Die's chest. 

Die shifted his aim to get it all in the toilet without splashing. He watched over his shoulder while he voided his bladder into the toilet. "Thank you for putting up with me," he murmured softly, "for doing stuff like this for me."

Kyo finished with a few more spurts then just stood there, letting the last of it drip off the head of his dick as he shrugged. "I figure there are worse things than letting you indulge a bit." He glanced up at Die. "Besides, I like making you happy."

Die kissed his cheek and shook him off before giving him a good two strokes. He tucked him back in and adjusted him like it was his own cock he was doing it to. He nuzzled against him again and then patted his ass. "Flush." He went and washed up his hands, the waited on Kyo.

Kyo grunted at the strokes then let Die once again take care of everything before reaching forward and flushing. He moved to wash his hands as well out of principal, then turned to look at Die. 

Die smirked at him. "That was nearly as satisfying as doing it myself." He let out a little laugh and then opened the door, gasping slightly to see Kaoru standing right outside. He was already clutching at himself and looking distressed.

"Move already. Jesus fuck." Kaoru pushed past Die and then past Kyo, not even waiting on the door to close before he was yanking his dick out and starting to go.

Die thought his eyeballs were going to pop out of his head and he had to stumble his way out of the bathroom, pretty much rushing for the bunk because that was not the person he needed to be staring at.

Kyo nearly yelped when Kaoru pushed into the bathroom with them, whipping his dick out frantically. He blinked then looked at Die, seeing the look on his face and almost wanting to laugh in a way. "Coulda knocked, Kao." He slipped out and shut the door, following Die to the bunk and crawling in. "You okay baby?" 

Die shoved himself in the bunk and lay there for a moment, his heart pounding frantically. He swallowed and rubbed his hand over his face when Kyo crawled in. He shook his head a little. "No... not really. God, what if he saw the look on my face?" he hissed out.

Kyo reached out and ran his hand over Die's arm, shaking his head. "Trust me, he didn't see anything but the toilet and relief. I don't think he noticed there were two of us in there." 

Die flopped back and he closed his eyes. "Please do not take this the wrong way... but that image is not going away any time soon."

Kyo raised an eyebrow, feeling an unwanted spike of jealousy. He let out a small huff and shrugged. "If you want to think about Kaoru's dick." 

Die arched an eyebrow at him. "Baby... I didn't see his dick. I mean the image of him dancing around holding his crotch. I got the fuck out of dodge before he started... you know."

Kyo just hummed in response, shrugging again. He wasn't sure but for some reason, the idea of Die thinking about Kaoru in that way bugged him. He was probably being stupid though. 

Die pursed his lips a little and felt honestly like he wanted to cry. He swallowed a bit and sighed. "I'm sorry," he murmured softly.

Kyo laid there for a moment then let out a soft sigh, feeling guilty for making Die feel bad. He found his hand and squeezed it softly, shaking his head. "Don't be." 

He closed his eyes and shook his head. "No... I guess I shouldn't be looking at anyone else, no matter how... uh... odd... the situation." He squeezed his hand as well.

Kyo shifted around and leaned up to kiss Die's cheek. "Well, I guess that's it though... I don't know how to feel in that situation." 

"If it makes any difference, I look at others, but it's you I love and will touch. I have eyes, but my body and heart are yours and yours alone."

Kyo felt like his chest might burst at Die's words. He scooted himself closer, nuzzling against his chest. "Ditto."

He pulled Kyo into his arms and kissed his cheek. "I'm sorry I made you jealous... but... I don't think I should lie either."

Kyo leaned into Die, stroking his back. "I appreciate that. I really do." He tilted his head up and lightly kissed Die, smiling. 

There was a shuffling sound outside the bunk and then a cough before Kaoru's voice. "I uh... I'm sorry I was so rude. I really had to go." He huffed a little and then shuffled off.

Die just remained quiet, not responding at all, hoping it was Kyo that he thought was there and only Kyo.

Kyo blinked then called out after Kaoru. "S'ok, I understand..." He turned back to Die and shrugged a bit.

Die rolled over on his side, facing the wall, trying to fight the image in his head. He sighed softly and closed his eyes. "Let's just sleep, yeah?" he murmured softly.

Kyo hummed and shifted around, looping his arm around Die's waist. "Yeah, sounds like a plan..."

Die tugged Kyo's arms closer around him and held him against himself real close. "Mmm... I love you, Kyo." He closed his eyes and heaved out a soft sound as he settled down.

Kyo closed his eyes, burying his nose against Die’s shoulder, murmuring softly as he began to doze, “I love you, too, Die.” 

**To Be Continued...**


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, dklc23, and sakura_ame

The show had been utterly perfect on Die's end. He hadn't missed anything major and Kaoru even high-fived him after the show, showing he didn't think he'd fucked up either. It left him feeling incredibly upbeat and alive. Even after they got back to the bus, he was antsy. He almost wanted an after party, but they had to get to the next venue. So, instead, he cracked a beer and settled back on the couch, his eyes alight with pleasure and a smile on his lips.

For Kyo, the show had been equally fantastic. His voice had remained smooth and unbroken the entire time and he'd been energetic throughout, even tossing a few water bottles to the crowd at the end. 

He had made his way to the showers first and then onto the bus to change and wait for Die so when the guitarist settled on the couch, he moved from the bunk area to sit next to him, grinning. "I'm jealous of your guitar tonight, baby." 

Die's eyes immediately flicked up to Kyo when he sat down next to him. He held his half empty bottle up in the air, toasting to an invisible source. "And maybe I'm a little jealous of your throat tonight, so... we're even." He smirked at the other and shook his head.

Kyo gave Die a dirty smirk and grabbed a drink for himself, clinking his bottle against Die's. "Mm, jealous of my throat? I can't exactly hump my throat... but you and your guitar, however..." 

Die's eyes took on a wicked look as he leaned in, one hand reaching to curve around Kyo's neck, stroking up the muscled column of flesh. "Yeah... but _I_ could hump it real well if you'd let me."

Kyo had to bite his bottom lip to keep from groaning out loud as Die's hand touch his neck, a spike of heat going straight to his groin. His own hand wandered to Die's thigh as he shifted to whisper lowly. "I think that's something that could be arranged..." 

Curiosity burned bright in Die's eyes as he slowly closed his fingers, squeezing just little by little to see what Kyo's reaction was to the whole thing. 

Kyo let his eyes slide shut, Die's actions having an obvious effect on him. His face flushed slightly as a quiet moan escaped him. He was definitely thankful that the others weren't on the bus yet. 

Die licked his lips a little and leaned in close, breathing softly across Kyo's mouth. "You like this? You enjoy having your most precious instrument threatened in such a way?"

Kyo shuddered, opening his eyes to stare into Die's. "It removes the control from my hands. I enjoy the struggle." He squeezed Die's thigh, digging his nails into the fabric of his lover's jeans. 

On instinct alone, Die thrust the beer bottle on the table and his hand shot out and grabbed hold of Kyo's wrist, wrenching it back and off to the side as he leaned in. His knee moved up between the other's legs, threateningly close to the vocalist's sac. "Beg me for my dick, Kyo. Beg me to fucking choke you with it."

Kyo's eyes flashed with surprise at Die's actions, a small yelp sounding from him as Die's knee pressed against his crotch. He wriggled his arm, finding the other's grip quite tight which only made him whimper again. "Ahh! Die..." He licked his lips and looked up at his lover, shivering a little before he commenced with the begging. "Please let me suck your cock, I want to feel you fucking the back of my throat with it, choking me, cutting off my air."

Die squeezed just a tiny bit more before he let go and backed up, standing and opening his pants. His belt jingled a little as he presented himself to Kyo, already partially hard. He gestured to the floor. "On your knees and you can have exactly what you want from me."

Kyo groaned softly and got to his knees without hesitation, leaning in to nuzzle Die's crotch, nipping at the skin right at the base of his cock. Smirking, he glanced up at Die and put on his best innocent face. "Is this what you want Die? Me, here on my knees for you?" 

Die let out a little grunt, grabbing Kyo's hair and directing him toward his cock. "It's what I've always wanted." He pushed his dick against the other's lips, waiting on him to open up and accept it.

Kyo gave a soft sound and parted his lips, eagerly accepting Die's cock, wrapping his lips around the tip of it, digging his tongue into the slit. 

Die let out a little whine and pushed the other a bit, trying to get him down further on his dick, still trying to be forceful with him.

Kyo flicked his eyes up at Die then slowly slid his mouth downward, taking Die's dick inch-by-inch until it was pressing against the back of his throat. He swallowed then started bobbing his head, going slow at first to ensure that his throat was relaxed. 

"Fuck, baby, be careful," Die gasped out, unable to keep up the badass front once he was concerned about the other's throat. He reached to stroke over his hair, groaning faintly, his eyelids fluttering a bit.

Kyo grunted in response, knowing his limits. He reached up and dragged his nails over Die's thighs while he sucked him, gradually picking up the pace, groaning around Die's dick. 

Die let out a keening whine and threw his head back, desperately trying not to thrust into the other's mouth at all. He was at the peak of his restraint, almost trembling from it.

Kyo pulled back and teased the head of Die's dick with his tongue, smirking up at him slightly. "I find it endearing that you're restraining yourself, baby." Without hesitation, he slid down on Die's cock once again, hollowing out his cheeks as he let out a low moan. Part of him wanted to feel his lover's cock choking him, despite knowing it would end up making his voice hoarse in the end.  
Die let out a strangled groan, fingers grasping at Kyo's hair again, pursing his lips a little and then huffing out his air, eyes rolling back in his head. He struggled to get the other's hand, pushing it toward his balls.

The vocalist followed Die's desperate movements, moving his hand to cup and squeeze his sac, his other finding a bare patch skin on Die's stomach and scratching his nails over it lightly, never ceasing the movements with his mouth. 

It didn't take him very long before he started to cum, shuddering and emptying himself into the other's waiting mouth. His eyes rolled back in his head and he groaned faintly.

Kyo took all Die had to offer, swallowing every last drop before lifting his head, swiping his tongue over the tip of Die's length then licking his lips. He lightly rubbed Die's thighs as he smirked up at him, loving the look on his face. 

He shuddered a little as he sort of slumped backwards a bit. "Oh my fucking lord." He sniffed and then chuckled.

Kyo stood and wiped his mouth, chuckled softly. "I'll take that as you're satisfied..." 

"Oh yeah, for sure." He reached for Kyo and pulled him up and close to him, leaning in to kiss him deeply.

Kyo slipped his arms around Die and returned the kiss, nipping his bottom lip. "Good..." 

Die slid his arms down the other's side. "You're... amazing at that, you know it?"

Kyo flushed slightly but grinned. "Nah, I just like your cock." 

"Good, because I have no idea what I'd do without you liking it." He laughed and lightly pinched Kyo's butt before letting go and nudging him slightly. “The others will be back soon.”

Kyo huffed slightly and nodded, moving back and making sure he was properly dressed and his hair was mostly in order. "Wish we could get more than a few moments alone..." 

Die nodded a little "It'd be nice, wouldn't it? Maybe we can ask Nora for something sometime."

He hummed and rubbed his chin, thinking. "Perhaps. There are a couple of days here and there where we don't have two shows in a row."

Die smiled and nudged him. "Just wait on it. It'll happen, I promise."

Kyo smiled and leaned up to kiss Die, pulling away just as the door opened, ending their alone time. "I hope so."

"I promise," he murmured one last time.

**To Be Continued...**


	14. Chapter 14

They'd had the day off for once and everyone had been given a free choice of the three hotels in the area. Die had a feeling that it had been Nora's way of trying to get them to not feel like sardines in a can and he was thankful for it, since it meant he and Kyo could find a place to themselves. She also just gave them money for the rooms, allowing them to actually pick it out themselves.

Die accepted his cash and watched Kyo take his as well, knowing they could end up with a damn nice single-bed suite for that price if they wanted. He'd ask once they'd chosen their hotel. Everyone else chose the two lower priced ones and Die pointed at the giant building that looked super high-class. "That one." He glanced at Kyo to see if he'd choose it as well.

Kyo had stood there fidgeting during the whole meeting, just ready to get the hell away from the rest of the band and crew, minus Die. He had begun feeling rather trapped and claustrophobic the last few days. He accepted his money and glanced at the hotel Die chose, automatically pointed to it as well, knowing they'd be pooling their cash for the room anyway. "That one, too." 

Die smirked a little and waited until Nora had gotten the driver to open the bottom of the bus, reaching in and getting his bag, his smaller one already over his shoulders. It was only midday and they had until the same time tomorrow before heading out, and that meant at least twenty-four hours away from the others.  
He stepped into the lobby of the hotel, the heater making him feel quite nice and he headed right for the desk, settling against the counter and quietly asking what sorts of king size rooms they had. The clerk was quite nice, pulling out a little pamphlet and showing him the various rooms.

Die immediately chose the third room on the list, done in whites and greys, the bed huge and a giant plush couch he already wanted to sit on in the room with it. It even came with a luxury jet tub and rain shower in the bathroom, a bidet listed under the amenities, something he always missed when overseas. She gave him the price and he immediately forked over his money and asked Kyo for seventy of his as well.

Kyo had quickly scooped up his bag and followed Die into the hotel, staring around in awe at the opulence of the lobby. He quietly peered over Die's shoulder at the pamphlet of rooms, humming softly in agreement at the one he chose. He slipped Die his portion of the cash then glanced at the desk clerk, wondering how odd this seemed to her. However, it seemed that money talked and she was just beaming at them, patiently waiting for Die to pay. 

Die handed over the cash and she pulled out two small duffel bags from under the counter, explaining that the room price also paid for these bags, the bath robes they were allowed to keep, and the soaps and whatnot that were in the bag. She gestured over at the bar behind them, explaining one free drink would be served in about half an hour, whatever they desired.

He smiled and took the bags, putting them on his rolling bag only to have a bell boy rush up and start loading their bags onto a cart. He just let him do so, smiling and accepting their room keys, which were actually keys rather than plastic cards.

Kyo blinked at the duffel bags, not understanding what the woman was saying in the least about them, but figured Die would tell him in a moment. He almost laughed when an actual bell boy came to get their bags, not exactly used to this sort of service overseas, since they had to be on a tighter budget. "Fancy..."

Die smirked a little. "I think that was supposed to be our food budget, too. But I don't care. I have my own money we can use for food tonight. This place is amazing... and they have a bidet." He padded after the bell boy, humming softly along the way.

Kyo snorted and followed along with them, looking around. "Yeah, I was going to suggest we spring for room service, if that's okay with you. I'm a little tired and want to just chill." 

"Sounds good to me." They got into the elevator and the bell boy pushed the buttons, basically keeping to himself, though he did glance curiously at Kyo's tattoos a few times. When they got out, he asked Die for the room key and went ahead to go get it opened and unload their items, doing so quite fast. Die dug out a twenty from his pocket and waited on the guy to finish. When he was done, he handed it over and thanked him. He thanked Die as well and disappeared down the hallway, Die entering the room and immediately ditching his boots on the corner. "Oh my god, it's so beautiful!"

Kyo nodded, reaching out to rub his hand over his arm once he noticed the bell boy staring at his tats. He wondered if the kid liked them or if he thought he was some Yakuza from the movies or something. The thought had him laughing softly to himself as he stepped into the room, slipping out of his shoes once they were alone. "This is spectacular, Dai..." 

He moved and flopped down on the bed with a huff. "Oh God, this is so soft. I'm never leaving. Cancel the rest of the tour." 

Die laughed softly at Kyo's reaction. He picked up the duffel bags and went to the bed with them, sitting down and passing one to Kyo. "They say these are ours, as well as the robes. We can take them when we leave. It's included in the price. Also, there's free drinks in half an hour down at the bar."

Kyo sat up and shifted to lean against Die as he took the duffel bag. "Cool, so you want to go get a drink, hm?" He glanced up at him and grinned. "I might even get one myself..." 

Die pulled out the stuff inside, finding a razor, deodorant, soap, shampoo and conditioner, lotion, and even a nail clipper set and small sewing kit. He grinned and put it down beside the bed. "Nice place. And yeah, a drink sounds great. But you know... the pool also sound wonderful. Did you see the photo of it on the bottom of that pamphlet?"

Kyo peered at the stuff, picking up the shampoo and sniffing it, finding it to be some high quality stuff. At the mention of the pool, he nodded and grinned. "Yeah, I noticed. It looked heavenly, especially since this is an adult hotel. There won't be any brats running around, being noisy." 

"My thoughts exactly." Die stood up and went to his bag, rooting around. He came up with a set of trunks and dangled them by a finger. "Let's go before we're too exhausted to do this, yeah?" He tossed them on the bed and started to strip down so he could change into them.

Kyo laughed and stood up, going to his bag and pulling out a pair of simple black trunks, following suit and stripping out of his clothes to pull them on. He dug out a pair of flip flops and a plain t-shirt, tugging it on over his head. "Don't forget our keys... I'd hate to have to go through the lobby soaking wet."

Die grunted a little and tucked the key into his pocket before putting on his Chrome Hearts flip flops and then shrugging into one of his shirts. "They should have towels there. If not, I'll come back and get them." He smirked and grabbed Kyo's ass as he walked past. "C'mon, let's get our free drinks and then our pool time."

Kyo let out an unmanly squeak at the ass grab, having not expected it. He huffed and swatted at Die before stepping into his shoes and following him out, nodding. "Yeah, pretty sure they'll have towels. This is too nice of a place...." 

Die chuckled, exiting the room and heading back toward the elevator, looking pleased with himself. "I haven't been swimming in a long time."

Kyo pressed the button and nodded. "Me either, not that I can swim that well anyway." He wrinkled his nose then stepped into the elevator once it arrived, almost frowning as he noticed someone else was on it. 

Die got into the elevator and waited on Kyo to follow, pushing the one for lobby to go get their drinks first. "This place is amazing."

Kyo leaned against the wall. "Yes it is. The rest of the members are gonna be jealous." He chuckled softly. 

The elevator arrived in the lobby and Die made his way to the bar, ordering the first strange looking drink on the menu as his free drink, waiting on Kyo to order his as well, a smirk on his lips.

Kyo glanced at the menu then at Die, huffing slightly as he pointed to a picture of what looked like a cherry flavored drink. He was really going to have to work on his English. 

The bar tender moved to go make their drinks and Die leaned on the counter, smiling happily. "I'm so glad we have today off. We can relax like normal people."

Kyo nodded, scooting onto a bar stool and looking around at the other people there, silently thanking whatever Gods above that there were no rabid fans. "Yeah, me too...it's so nice to not be on a schedule."

Their drinks were served up in record time and handed to them. Die smiled and accepted his, thanking the bar tender and then making a mental note to tip him later. He licked his lips a little and headed toward the sign that said pool.

Kyo took his with a nod then followed Die, chancing a sip of his drink as he walked. "Oh God, this is... strong, but good." He stepped into the pool area, glad to see it was completely unoccupied. "And it looks like we're alone." 

Die licked the rim of his glass and then took a drink, smirking. "Amazing. This one was labeled as Zombie Juice." He took another drink as they came into the pool area. It was a rather huge pool, with little fountains spraying into it at odd points, a hot tub that was semi-attached in the far side. He immediately headed for the shallow end, stepping down three steps and settling in, drink still in hand. He put it aside and took off his shirt, tossing it off onto one of the recliners, leaning back on the step and tilting his head back. "C'mere, sweet thing."

Kyo grinned and set his drink down, shrugging out of his shirt and placing it on the same chair as Die's before grabbing his drink again and stepping into the pool, relieved that the water was warmed just right. "Zombie Juice, eh? I have no idea what mine was called, it just looked good and I was right. It's delicious and sweet." He moved over to Die, slipping his arm around him with a sigh, sipping at his drink. "God, this is like... paradise." 

"Cherry Rock'n'Roll," Die murmured, with a smirk. "Fitting." He offered some of his toward Kyo as well. The door opened and a few people came in, most of them younger adults, early twenties from the looks of it, two girls and a guy. One set of them split off to go to the hot tub and the other girl stepped around them, heading into the water and away from them, quietly apologizing for disturbing them.

Kyo chuckled softly at the name. "Indeed." He took Die's, handing him his drink before trying out the Zombie one, mmming. "That one is good too..." He looked up at the other people, almost moving away from Die when the girl came into the pool, but decided to just stay when she didn't seem to care. 

Die took a drink of Kyo's and then traded him back for his own. "They're both nice." He smiled a little and shifted slightly closer to Kyo, sensing his discomfort. "Don't worry, no one looked at us like they know us," he murmured as quietly as he could.

Kyo nodded slightly, sipping his drink again, the alcohol being strong enough to already start affecting him. "Good, I'd really hate to be all over the damn tabloids and shit." He sighed slightly and leaned his head against Die's shoulder for a moment. 

"Eh... I don't think anyone would care about us in that way over here. I mean... we're not big enough to have something like that follow us on US soil." He put one hand on Kyo's under the water, smirking slightly.

Kyo hummed and shifted a bit, squeezing Die's fingers then finishing off his drink. He moved over to the edge of the pool, setting his glass down then making his way back to Die, noting that no one was paying attention. He smiled and slipped his arms around his lover's waist, sighing softly. "This is so relaxing."

Die took a bit longer to finish his drink, it having come in a larger glass to start with. He leaned into Kyo's touch and sort of let out a little rumbly sound, implying he was quite happy with this idea. "I agree."

The drink relaxed him enough that he leaned into Die's chest, nuzzling a bit. "Mmm..." 

Die chuckled a little. "You're adorable." He glanced up as the girl who'd gotten into the pool pulled herself up on the side and scooted back over the little gutter that ran around the pool. She held a hissed conversation with the ones in the hot tub and they started laughing, the boy encouraging, "Do it! Do it!"

Kyo snorted at Die, thumping him on the back. "I'm not cute. I'm scary." He mock pouted then looked in the direction of the girl as she got out of the pool, catching the words her friends were saying. "Wonder what that's all about..."

Die shrugged a little. "Who knows. Maybe wanting her to jump in or something." He sniffed a little and looked away.

The girl finally laughed and pulled her legs out as well, spreading them and reaching to get her bathing suit out of the way. She shifted forward a little bit and started to piss into the drain, the sound of it quite loud and distinctive in the enclosed room.

Die's eyes snapped back toward her, his heart racing in his chest. Was this really happening right then? Right in front of him?

Kyo hummed then jerked his head up, hearing the sound and then seeing her position. He automatically looked at Die, his expression an odd mix between horrified about the fact that she might get pee in the pool and amused because he knew this would affect Die. "Oh...." 

She finished up with a little groan and then glanced over toward them, calling "Sorry! Nature calls and the room's on the 20th floor!"

Die huffed out a little sound, burying his face in Kyo's shoulder. He was a bit horrified, not knowing what to say or do, especially given that he was steadily growing aroused from what had just transpired. He just hoped that his dick wouldn't get hard and give him away, fear gripping his insides as to how Kyo would react.

Kyo gave a shrug at the apology, mostly because he didn't know what she said after, "Sorry". He shifted a bit and lightly patted Die's back, licking his lips. "Baby... alright?" 

Die tried to take a deep steadying breath before he responded at all. He then sat up, trying to look as composed as possible. "Yeah..." he shifted a little and desperately began to wish he could just make this all not happen as he felt his body start to react, his mind processing the sound of it over and over. He pulled away. "Gonna swim a few laps." He slipped off into the water and started to swim laps, almost desperate to keep his crotch down and out of the way of anyone seeing for the time being.

Kyo blinked at Die's odd reaction then noticed the slightest bulge in his trunks as he pulled away. "O-ok... I'll be here." He was a bit confused by it all, wondering why Die was acting like he didn't already know about his fetish. He sighed and sunk down in the water, sort of swimming around but not really doing laps. He couldn't help but feel like the entire mood of the afternoon had been ruined.

It took Die at least fifteen minutes before he calmed down enough to not have his dick tenting his swim trunks anymore. He dove under and then came back up at Kyo's feet, standing up and slicking the water out of his hair. He noticed the others had left and he glanced at the hot tub. "Want to go in there for a bit?" he asked quietly.

Kyo shrugged lightly at Die's suggestion, moving for the ladder and pulling himself out of the pool. "Glad they left." He slipped into the hot tub with a sigh, settling onto the built in bench. 

Die went the other way, pulling himself up from the pool into the hot tub, settling down in the center, sort of floating there. He still looked a bit uncomfortable, but didn't say anything. 

Kyo huffed, frustrated with Die's mood. He leaned his head back and sighed again, flicking the water with his fingers. It didn't help any that the alcohol from earlier had made its way to his bladder. He wanted to say something but he really didn't feel like going to find a restroom and he wasn't about to piss down the drain either. 

It took him a minute, but Die finally floated over to Kyo, settling his arms on the other's knees, peering up at him, a sort of bewildered look on his face. He opened his mouth twice to say something and then finally hung his head a little.

Kyo glanced down at Die when he moved over to him. "Daisuke... what the hell?" He was starting to get downright concerned with the way Die was acting, not to mention utterly confused. 

Die pursed his lips a little, trying hard not to actually react the way he thought he was going to. That terrible feeling was welling up in the back of his throat and he just shook his head a little, trying to shake it off. "What?" he finally asked, very quiet about it.

Kyo gritted his teeth, reaching down to grasp Die's arms. "What the hell is wrong with you? You're acting like... like... fuck, I don't even know! I mean, it's not like I don't know that girl pissing in the gutter affected you." He sighed and let go of Die, crossing his arms. 

Die gasped a little at Kyo's reaction. He pulled back slightly and stared up at him in a way that clearly showed how shocked he was. After a moment, he looked away and he sighed, shifting onto the seat across from Kyo, his head hung in shame. "I'm sorry, okay? I... I don't know why things keep happening around me like that. I can't change that it does and I can't change how I react to it!" He honestly was close to tears, panic welling up inside him. Under the water, his fingers trembled as he grasped the edge of the seat. 

Kyo reached up and scrubbed his hand over his face, sighing softly. "Die... I thought we'd established that I was okay with... that. So, to have you freaking out on me is unsettling." He glanced over at him, frowning. 

The guitarist gritted his teeth, trying to stop the stupid sissy feeling inside him that wanted to make him cry. It took him a few minutes to actually gather up the ability to talk again. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry. I just... it aroused me... and I hate that it did and I'm sorry."

Kyo sighed again then turned, placing his hand on Die's shoulder. "Stop apologizing... I know it aroused you. I know seeing Kaoru that way aroused you. It's okay... really." He could hear the tremble in Die's voice; that tone people get when they're close to tears. He hated it. It made him feel helpless because he couldn't seem to calm Die down. 

Die took in a deep breath. "I think we should go back to the room," he murmured softly. 

Kyo nodded and stood up, making his way out of the hot tub and grabbing one of the plush towels that were stacked nearby. He wrapped his around his shoulders then held one out for Die before walking back to their stuff. He dried off a bit then slipped his shirt and shoes on, keeping the towel around his waist to catch drips from his trunks. 

Die got out as well, carefully drying off and then squeezing his trunks out as well. He put the towel around his waist as well and then went about getting his t-shirt on and then his flip flops. He picked up their used glasses and checked to make sure he had his key. He sighed softly, opening the door and letting Kyo out ahead of him.

Kyo glanced back at Die then slipped out of the pool area, heading for the elevator that was nearby, pushing the button. He kept shooting Die glances from the corner of his eye, his mouth set in a frown. 

Die dropped their glasses off at the bar and headed back to the elevator just as it arrived. He pursed his lips a little and then entered, pressing for their floor and taking out his key.

Kyo stepped into the elevator with Die, leaning against the wall of it, fidgeting with his towel. Once they arrived at their floor, he stepped out and led the way to the room, waiting on Die to open the door with the key. 

Die trailed after Kyo and then unlocked the door, stepping inside and quickly entering the bathroom. He waited until the main door was closed before he quickly stripped off and got into the shower, turning it on with a yelp as the cold water hit him full on.

Kyo had just stepped into the bathroom when Die yelped. He jerked his head up then realized what had happened, letting out a little chuckle before he stripped out of his own wet clothes. 

After squeezing out his trunks and hanging them up to dry, he sighed and glanced at Die, clearing his throat to get his attention. "Erm... I have to piss... just... you know." He normally wouldn't have bothered announcing it, but the current situation made him feel like he needed to.

The water heated up a bit and Die quickly grabbed the car of soap on the ledge, getting it unwrapped and whatnot. He glanced up when Kyo spoke and then flushed a little, responding with, "Okay," before trying to concentrate on his shower. He was still feeling really worked up and he didn't know what to do entirely about what had happened down at the pool.

Kyo moved to the toilet which happened to be right by the shower. He started to go, letting out a sigh of relief. He hadn't realized how bad he'd needed to go. 

Even over the sound of the shower, he could clearly hear what Kyo was doing and he found his body had an even more violent reaction to him than it did earlier. He started to harden very quickly, getting to full arousal quite fast. His heartbeat sped up and the moment he heard Kyo sigh, he damn near didn't stop the moan that wanted to come out. But it also swelled up the fear of what had happened earlier and he found himself trying to hide his reaction in the corner, his heart in his throat.

Kyo finished up finally with another sigh, shaking off and moving to the sink to rinse his hands on principal before going back to the shower. "...mind if I join you?" 

Die shifted a little, reaching to use the dispenser for the shampoo on the wall, getting a handful and working it up into lather in his hair. "That's fine," he murmured softly, all the while cursing his body under his breath.

Kyo stepped into the shower, moving to stand under the spray which put him in close proximity to Die. After a moment, he huffed and reached around, grasping Die's arousal lightly. "You can't hide it from me..." 

Die let out a sharp cry as Kyo reached around him to grab his dick. His body shuddered a bit violently and he grabbed the wall for support, not having expected Kyo to have done that. He closed his eyes, trying to calm down. "Can't help it," he whispered out, whimpering a little.

Kyo let out a soft laugh, stroking Die slowly, shivering slightly at how incredibly hard he was, his own cock starting to react. "I know,” he murmured as he leaned forward and placed a kiss to the back of Die's neck. 

Die leaned against the cool wall, sighing softly as he allowed Kyo to stroke him. He shuddered again, unable to stop the reaction, all his barriers down due to the unnecessary stresses he'd just encountered. He closed his eyes, trying to fight the stress down. His hand came down to grasp Kyo's wrist, just settling there, not forcing him in any way.

Kyo took his time, going slow and light, placing soft kissing along Die's skin. He could tell his lover was feeling vulnerable and unsettled and he hated it, wanted to soothe it. He brought his other hand around to splay on Die's stomach, rubbing lightly. 

Die stood there, his breathing definitely in the desperate sort of category. He let out a little whine and finally pushed toward Kyo's hand, needing a little more but unwilling to just ask for it.

Kyo hummed softly at Die's whine, smirking against his back. He shifted a bit then grasped his cock more firmly, picking up the speed of his strokes, swiping his thumb over the head a few times. 

The moment the other sped up, Die let out a little groan, hips jerking once before he was cumming, spurting his release all over the wall in front of him. He didn't even have a moment to think about it before it happened, a shock to even himself.

When Die came suddenly, Kyo let out a small sound of surprise. He stroked him a few more times then pulled his hand away, chuckling softly as cum stuck to it, stringing between Die's cock and his fingers. 

Die stayed there for a moment, chest heaving as he gasped in air. "Oh god," he whispered out, a bit horrified with how fast he'd cum.

Kyo shifted to rinse his hand under the spray of the shower, smirking a little. "Indeed..." 

Die finally pushed away from the wall and sighed softly, reaching to wash himself off and his hair out, putting conditioner in it. "I um... didn't mean to... so fast."

Kyo shrugged, moving away from Die so the other could finish washing, turning to grab the soap, quickly washing himself then moving on to his hair, ignoring the fact that his dick was fully hard. "You were pretty worked up... I'm not surprised." He rinsed himself then started shampooing his hair, scrubbing his scalp with his nails. 

Die finished up with his conditioner and then ran his hand over Kyo's abdomen as he slipped past him. He still felt that swell of displeasure, but he wasn't entirely sure what to do about it. He murmured, "Meet me in bed," before slipping away.

Kyo shivered as Die touched him, nodding in response as he went about finishing his shower. The mood was still odd, despite his arousal. He rinsed his hair, conditioned it, and rinsed it again then stepped out, drying off quickly. He slung the towel around his waist and walked into the main room, moving to sit on the edge of the bed near Die. 

Die dried off hurriedly and then slid onto the bed, the comforter pushed down to the bottom. He'd worked himself into half arousal again, the lube from his bag lying on the bed next to him, though it was obvious he'd also prepped himself already.

Kyo stood again and tossed the towel to the floor before turning and crawling onto the bed, glancing down at Die then at the lube, a slow smirk spreading on his lips. "Mm, you work fast..." 

Die flushed a little, just reaching for Kyo, tugging him close to him. "I need you... please."

Kyo shifted on top of Die, hovering above him for a moment before leaning down and kissing him lightly as he pressed against him, letting out a soft moan. "You're gorgeous." He positioned himself and slowly slid into Die's body, shuddering as the heat enveloped his cock. 

Die let out a little whine, one leg lifting to curl around Kyo's thigh, pulling him closer with it. He arched up a little, his eyes rolling back in pleasure. "Oh god... Kyo," he murmured out.

Kyo reached down to grasp Die's hip, pushing in to the hilt and staying still for a moment before starting to thrust into him, slowly picking up speed. "Die!" 

Die clung to him, panting softly, his hips arching up into the thrusts the other made into his body. "Kyo...." 

Kyo leaned down, burying his head against Die's neck, biting a little roughly as he pushed into him harder, a muffled moan escaping him. "Hnng!" 

Die gasped out as the other shoved into him a bit more roughly, his hips jerking upward and staying there. "O-oh!"

Kyo shifted back onto his knees, giving himself more leverage. He ran his hand over Die's chest and down to his cock, wrapping his fingers around it, stroking in time with his thrusts. "Yes...." 

Die groaned happily as the other started to stroke him off. His hand came down to hold onto Kyo's wrist again, enjoying feeling him doing this to him. "Please," he whispered out, not even sure what he was begging for.

Kyo paused for a moment to shift his hand, intertwining his fingers with Die's then going back to stroking him off, using both of their hands. "Die, you feel so good," he groaned out, snapping his hips roughly. 

Die's cries grew in volume, his hips moving with Kyo's thrusts and the pumps on his shaft. He clamped down around him, hoping Kyo would enjoy it.

Kyo shuddered as Die's body clamped around him, rocking his hips faster, his breath coming in pants. He used his free hand to scratch his nails down Die's thigh, groaning at the sight of the red lines that appeared.

"Come on, baby, fuck me like you need me to breathe," Die whispered out, his expression almost desperate.

Kyo didn't have any issue in complying with Die's request, shifting a bit and grasping both of his wrists, pinning them to the bed on either side of Die's head. "I do need you to breathe, more than you're ever know," he murmured lowly before he started slamming into Die's body, sounds of pleasure spilling from his lips in increasing volume. 

Die lay there, his wrists trapped under Kyo's hands, feeling more vulnerable in that moment than he ever had before. His breath caught in his throat as he stared up at Kyo, watching him move over him, his eyes full of love and so much trust. In that one moment, he knew everything was okay, that it was all trust and complete love... and all so completely worth it.

Kyo gazed down at Die, thrusting into him hard and fast, his body coated in sweat, shuddering from the effort. He could see the emotions in his lover's eyes and he leaned down, placing a breathless kiss to his lips. "I love you, Daisuke," he panted out against them before his hips snapped forward hard once more and he cried out, almost singing out his pleasure as he started to orgasm.

Die let out his own cry under Kyo, wrapping his legs around the other, body arching up toward him. The moment he felt the other start to fill him, he let out a soft sound and then whispered out, "I love you, too, Tooru."

Kyo rocked his hips, moaning softly at Die's words, finally releasing his wrists to bring his hand up, dragging it through Die's hair. He finally stilled his body and slumped down atop Die's, burying his face against his neck. He felt drained in the best way possible. 

Die wrapped his arms around the other's body, holding onto him. He held him close, shivering. He wanted to apologize to the other for the incident earlier, but he didn't, knowing it would ruin the mood. Instead, he just squeezed him closer to him.

Kyo nuzzled into Die's neck, kissing the skin there lightly before lifting his head to look down at him. "You're... perfect." 

Die reached up to touch the sides of Kyo's face, smiling softly. "I love you so much."

Kyo smiled softly, running his hand down over Die's chest and stomach, stroking over his length lightly. "Not as much as I love you."

Die gasped when the other touched his arousal. "A-ah!" He knew he was being loud, but he also knew he didn't care right then, in this place where no one knew them.

Kyo chuckled lowly, having known Die was still aroused, despite their tender moment. "That's right baby, I love it when you scream for me." He wrapped his fingers around Die, stroking him lightly. 

After a moment, Die reached down to grab his wrist again, enjoying every second of it. "K-Kyo!"

Kyo shifted slightly, rocking his hips just a bit, providing Die with some sensation even if he was mostly soft. He dipped his head down to swipe his tongue over a nipple as he moved his hand a little faster. 

Die let out another whine and arched toward him, his eyelids fluttering closed as he started to cum, spurting it out across his own abdomen.

Kyo groaned, slowing then stopping his strokes, pulling his hand away after a moment. He couldn't resist trailing a finger through the mess, smirking up at Die. "God, baby... so sexy." 

Die whimpered a little as he relaxed on the bed. He licked his lips and then closed his eyes. "Come here... lay here with me."

Kyo gladly did so, moving to lie next to Die, resting his head against his shoulder. He reached up and stroked his hand over Die's cheek, smiling up at him, feeling blissful. 

Die huffed out a little breath, curling his arm protectively around his lover's shoulders. "I'm sorry I freaked out earlier," he finally murmured.

Kyo leaned up and kissed Die's cheek, shaking his head. "It's okay, baby. You just had me worried there." 

Die pursed his lips a little and then sighed softly. "I just... I still feel bad about it."

Kyo nodded slightly, leaning back to look up at Die. "Don't, okay? You can't help it any more than I can help the fact that I'm short."

"I know..." he murmured softly, "I just... I don't know." Die sighed.

Kyo rubbed his hand over Die's chest, shrugging slightly. He wasn't sure what to say really. "I know, Die, I know." 

"I love you... and I love your forgiveness and understanding," Die offered quietly, stroking his hand down the other's back.

Kyo smiled softly and pecked Die's cheek. "I love you, too... and how could I be anything but forgiving after all I've put you through over the years?" 

Die gave Kyo his best little smile, leaning into the other's touch. "It's not been so bad, you know."

Kyo chuckled and cocked his head. "No? I haven't been trying hard enough then." He smiled at Die's smile, unable to resist leaning in to kiss those upturned lips. "You're adorable." 

"Ah, I think it's been quite enough, my sweet." The discomfort was sort of wearing off, though he honestly had to admit that he had been royally freaked out by how he'd reacted to the girl earlier and Kaoru the night before. Some part of him wanted to talk about it, but another part of him thought that'd be rude.

Kyo chuckled again then shifted so he could peer at Die better. "I know you're still... unhappy... with what happened. If you want to discuss it, I'm all ears. If not, that's fine, too." He reached up and combed his fingers through Die's hair soothingly. 

Die shifted closer to him and closed his eyes. Kyo always seemed to know what he needed the most. After a few moments, he started talking, his voice low, if not a bit sheepish. "I just... god, in a few ways I hate that my body reacts, even when I'm not actually attracted to the person. But it's like... the sound and the knowledge of it."

Kyo hummed softly in response. He didn't fully understand that part of his lover's fetish, but he did get being freaked out by one's reactions to things. "Which explains why girls doing the pee-pee dance tickles your fancy..."

Die flushed a little and reached to rub at his nose a little. "I... uh... yeah...." He fell silent for a moment and then muttered out, "Sometimes I just listen to it... and that's all I need. I think maybe that's the most humiliating part of it all."

Kyo gave Die a light pat, shrugging slightly. "You can't help what gets you off. All I can say is I'm just glad you don't want to drink it or something. Everything else, I can deal with." 

Die made a face. "It fucking smells most of the time. Why the hell anyone would want that shit in their face, mouth, or stomach is beyond me." He sighed softly and dropped his hand down on the bed near his head, just sort of flopping there. "I can't even watch the porn with it in it. It makes me lose my fucking boner."

Kyo had to laugh at that, quickly halting it though with his hand over his mouth. "Yeah, it would me, too..." He reached up and grasped Die's hand, squeezing it.

Die's long fingers curled around Kyo's, returning the squeeze gently. "I just have to put this out there... I quite often feel like a total freak. I mean... I'm the one with the fucking weird-ass fetish. I don't think anyone else has one that rivals it in strangeness. It's an uncomfortable feeling."

The corners of Kyo's mouth tugged down a fraction at his lover's words. "You don't know that for sure... Kaoru could be harboring a deep fetish for licking door knobs and you're forgetting that I have thing for cutting my skin open." He sighed softly. "All of that aside though, I understand how uncomfortable it can be... so, just talk to me when it is, okay?" 

Die reached for Kyo, gently trailing his fingers over the other's skin. "I don't consider yours strange... all of the world knows." He had to quirk a tiny smile though. "Door knobs? Really?"

Kyo hummed, shrugging slightly. "The world may know but it still freaks people out sometimes." He gave Die a grin, nodding. "I saw it on one of those documentary things. These people, mostly chicks, were getting their freak on with the door knobs. Then there was this one dude that was having a sexual relationship with his car."

Die arched an eyebrow and rolled over. "Dude... I guess I can see a chick wanting it, I mean... it's bound to feel at least okay up in there. But... what part of his car exactly?"

Kyo readjusted and shook his head. "All of it apparently. It showed him underneath it, making out with the fender..." 

Die had to laugh a little and then shook his head. "Okay. I guess I have no room to talk, but... at least something useful! Gearshift?"

Kyo snorted. "Up the tailpipe, maybe? I dunno. All I could think of was getting rust or something in my junk." 

"Not comfy, man. Not at all." He rolled closer to Kyo and smiled softly. "I feel a little better now. Thanks for talking with me."

Kyo grinned and nuzzled into Die, flopping his leg over the other's. "Any time baby... I'm glad you feel better." 

**To Be Continued...**


	15. Chapter 15

When Kyo woke up on the wrong side of the bed, he was usually in for a rough couple of days. It never mattered what was going on in his life, when his mood took a down swing, he had to ride it out and simply hope that he didn't hurt anyone's feelings. 

Today was one of those days and panic had made him avoid Die as much as possible so he wouldn't snap or hurt his lover in any way. He stayed on the bus during sound check and mostly hid inside his coat at the meet and greet. 

When it came time for them to hit the stage, he did so with the intent of ripping whatever demon it was that was tormenting him to shreds. He tore into the opening song viciously and continued on, spiraling downward as the show went on. 

Die had been trying to find Kyo and talk to him all day, but the other seemed to be strategically avoiding him. It was sort of beyond him as to what exactly the issue was, but he didn't push his luck, just waiting on the concert to be over. As they entered the stage, he found himself wincing at Kyo's viciousness, having to sort of turn away from the other to not end up entirely focused on him for the entirety of the show.

By the time they were up for the encore, Kyo was so deep within himself that he barely noticed the crowd or the rest of the band, including Die. He just knew that this was something he had to get out on his own and hope that it would ease off once the show was over. They were set to play Mazohyst for the last song and he threw every bit of anger, sadness and frustration he had into it, screaming himself hoarse by the time the last notes faded away in an attempt to shake the dark fog surrounding him. Unfortunately, it didn't work and as soon as he stumbled off stage, he punched the nearest wall with a bitter growl. 

Die found himself wondering what was going on by the time they were done. He thrust his guitar at Kuroo and quickly went about depositing picks and water bottles into the audience, even grabbing Kyo's bottle and tossing it out as well. He headed out after Kyo, frowning as he rounded the corner, wondering what he'd find.

When Die appeared in the hallway he was currently abusing, Kyo had the insane urge to tell him to just get out. He knew the other had seen him at his absolute worst but somehow, this was different. He was... scared, not to mention confused, by the inner turmoil he was experiencing. Instead of saying anything at all though, he merely slumped against the wall and hid his face by tipping his head down and away from Die.

Die took in a soft breath and moved close to the other, sliding his hand down the vocalist's back. He didn't say anything, not knowing what to say in the least to help him. He just slid his arms around the other's body, leaning his cheek against the other's back.

Kyo shuddered at Die's touch, hesitating then bringing his hand up to place over the other's. He let out an annoyed huff, his stomach twisted in an anxious knot. After a few moments, he finally whispered, barely audible, "If I could explain, I would." 

Die nodded a little, kissing at his shoulder blade ever so gently. "I know... I know, baby." He rubbed his cheek over the other's sweat-slicked skin. "Is there anything I can do?"

Kyo almost let out a laugh, shaking his head slightly. What he wanted and needed right then was a release; usually accomplished through abusing himself, focusing the pain elsewhere, and turning it physical rather than emotional. He was afraid to ask Die for that kind of thing though, despite their frequent foray into all manner of kink. This was somehow different. 

The guitarist smoothed his hands down the other's chest, turning his head to kiss lightly at his neck. His hand moved down to tease over his lower abdomen, not trying to go anywhere with it, just wanting to be soothing and blatantly there for the other.

Kyo finally relaxed enough to lean back more against Die's chest, letting out another breath. When people started milling around, gathering up equipment, he sighed and whispered to Die. "Is there somewhere we can go... alone?"

Die nodded a little, pulling back from him and taking his hand. He led them down the hallway and into a small room labeled _Thinking Room_. He slipped inside and pulled the door shut behind them, pushing the little lock button on the door and taking Kyo to the couch. He settled down and patted the seat next to him, the light in the room very dim.

Kyo looked around the room with some appreciation before sitting on the couch and curling back up against Die, still fighting his way through the murky thoughts in his head. "I hate this... I hate this part of me... this fucking pit inside." 

Die slipped his arm around the other, pulling him close to his side. He leaned his chin on the other's head. "I love every single piece of you, even the negative bits."

Kyo grunted softly and allowed Die to pull him close, trying not to squirm. He glanced up at his lover then bit his lip, reaching up to scratch his chest, probably harder than necessary. "Usually... I can relieve this by... finding something sharp." 

Die's eyes slid down to the other's nails, watching as he dug at his chest a bit. He gently grasped his hand and brought it to his lips, pressing a kiss to his fingertips. "Can we try another way and if that doesn't work... then I'll leave you to your devices?"

Kyo shifted and looked up at Die, taking a moment to appreciate how damn beautiful _his_ lover was in the soft light of the room. He snorted as the bitter thought of, _you don't deserve him_ , filtered in his head before he chased it away. "And what way did you have in mind?"

"Lay down on your front," Die murmured, getting up and waiting until the other did as he asked. He settled down on his knees beside the couch. He reached out and gently began to massage the other, following the actions of his hands with those of his mouth.

Kyo did as Die asked then let out a soft sound as the other started massaging him, his muscles far too tense for his liking. He let his eyes slide shut, his body trying to relax.

Die leaned into the harder muscles, intentionally doing it in a far firmer manner than was necessary, trying to cause him some amount of pain in a manner that it was acceptable and even expected.

The vocalist shifted and groaned when Die hit a particularly sore muscle hard, the small amount of pain it caused making him shiver slightly. "Hnn..." 

Die paid close attention to the other and how things were affecting him, wanting to ensure he was doing his part in this. He pushed against the other, working his way down his back and closer to his ass, knowing the lower back could be horrid.

Kyo was finally unwinding, the knot inside him easing up little-by-little. He couldn't help fidgeting though, shifting against the couch some. He had just settled again when Die hit a spot just above his ass that made him groan, pain shooting up his spine. "F-uck!"

Die chuckled a little and pushed down on it again. "Stubborn, baby." He kissed his upper back as he worked out the knot.

Kyo grunted, turning his head back to look at Die with a look of disgruntlement. "Bite me." 

"I was talking about your muscle, but okay." He leaned down and yanked his pants down enough to reveal one ass cheek, sinking his teeth into it enough to hurt, but not enough to draw blood.

Kyo was not expecting Die to actually bite him, much less on the ass and the action drew a surprised yelp from his lips. He wriggled a bit, another sound escaping him that had nothing to do with surprise. 

Die let out a little laugh, kissing the area he'd bitten before going back to massaging the other. "You asked for it."

Kyo huffed and shook his head before readjusting and getting comfortable again, feeling less and less moody, though it was still there. 

Die worked his way over Kyo's entire back and then down the backs of his thighs, even massaging his ass before his hands started to ache. He plopped down on his butt and held his hands out with a whine. "Please?"

Kyo moved and sat up, looking at Die's hands sympathetically, reaching out to take them, squeezing lightly. "Thank you, baby. It helped..." 

Die groaned lightly when the other started to massage his hands. He looked pleased with the outcome. "That's not all of it, just... need my hands back in shape is all."

Kyo drop one of Die's hands, focusing on a single one for now, griping it in his own and squeezing then using his thumbs to massage the palm. After a moment, he moved to the fingertips and brushed his own against the calluses there before going back to massaging, doing each finger slowly.

Die groaned as the other got toward the end of the whole thing. "God, baby, you do this fantastically."

Kyo chuckled softly and finally finished the one hand, pulling it to his mouth to brush his lips over the back of it then grabbing Die's other hand, giving it the same treatment. "I paid attention when we were getting massages back in the day."

"I did, too." He smiled after a moment and leaned in to kiss him on the lips. "But... are you serious, did it help at all?"

Kyo pecked Die's lips then nodded. "Yeah, it did... gave me something else to focus on. It's still there but not as severe." 

Die nodded a little, pulling his hand back from the other and shifting to straddle his lap, rubbing his hands down the other's chest and sides, dragging his fingers roughly, leaving red trails behind.

Kyo raised his hands to grip Die's hips when he slid into his lap, letting out a groan at Die's fingers, his body shivering a bit. "Die..." 

"Mmm... hush, baby... I know what you need." Die raked his nails up his sides, making sure not to actually cut him, but put it in as much as possible.

Kyo leaned back against the couch, holding on to Die tightly as he relished the sting of nails digging into his skin. He moaned lowly, unable to resist rolling his hips up a bit. 

Die pushed toward him, grunting softly, unable to help that he wanted him, despite this not being about him at all. He sniffed a little and reached to grab the other's hair, yanking him back and exposing his neck, scraping his teeth over it. He let out a rough sort of moan, his palm running roughly over the other's crotch, knowing the harshness of it would get his lover riled up.

Kyo groaned, shuddering at the rough treatment, loving every second of it, his cock twitching in response. "Hnng, Die... fuck!" 

Die shifted closer to him and leaned in to kiss his neck gently. After a moment, he sighed softly, breath huffing out over the other's skin. He licked his lips a little and nuzzled him a bit as he continued to rub over his cock harshly. He only hoped this was considered helping Kyo's issues.

The smaller man slipped his hands up to scratch down Die's back, bucking his hips into his touch, his mind driven with lust now as pleasure-pain coursed through him. He needed more though to push away the black cloud that had descended upon him. He turned his head to nip at Die's ear then whispered into it lowly, "Fuck me... please." 

It took everything in Die not to react in a surprised manner. But the truth was, he hadn't expected Kyo to say such a thing. He nodded a little and shifted against him, pushing his hand up to Kyo's zipper and tugging it down before flicking open his belt and the button on his jeans. "No lube," he huffed out, more of a comment on the fact that he had none than anything else.

Kyo shook his head and spat into his hand, reaching down to slip it into Die's pants and stroke over his cock, wetting it as best as he could. "Don't care." 

Die's breath hitched in his throat and he groaned softly. "Mmnnnggg!" He licked his lips a little and tugged Kyo's pants down around his thighs. "Turn over and stick that fine ass up in the air for me, baby." He stood up and quickly unfastened his pants, hoping Kyo would be ready fast.

Kyo pulled his hand away and did as Die asked, pushing his rear up in the air. He glanced back at his lover with dark eyes, murmuring, "Don't hold back."

"Don't worry; too worked up to hold back." Die grabbed his hips and positioned himself, pushing in with a grunt. "Oh lord," he hissed out, "so fucking tight."

Kyo let out groan, shifting and pushing back against Die, relishing the pain he felt from being taken this way. Yes, this is what he needed. "F-uck!"

"Holy shit." Die couldn't even seem to control himself. After a moment, he started to thrust into the other, not starting slow or anything, just fucking him hard and quick.

Kyo growled and clawed at the couch, looking for purchase. He arched his back and pushed Die deeper inside him with a low cry, his cock throbbing between his legs. 

Die kept moving, faster and faster, little whimpering sounds coming out every few seconds. He shoved into the other and paused, leaning over Kyo and reaching under him, raking his nails up Kyo's stomach.

Kyo was falling apart, tumbling so close to the edge as Die drove into his body repeatedly. When he felt the sharp sting of Die's nails on his stomach, his body jerked and he was suddenly cumming hard, spilling onto the couch beneath them, crying out Die's name.

The guitarist was almost shocked as his lover came all over the couch. He shuddered and groaned, his hand sliding down to Kyo's cock to jerk him off a few times while he was still in the throes of passion. He kissed his shoulder and thrust in a few more times in just the right way, trying to get off as fast as possible.

Kyo moaned and shuddered as Die continued to move within him, his body clenching around his cock. He was reeling from slight shock that he'd cum so fast and so hard. "Die... God~!" 

Die pushed in a few more times and then stilled as he started to cum. He didn't pull out, just letting Kyo feel him as he filled him up. "Fuck, baby..." he murmured softly.

Kyo finally slumped forward, resting on his elbows to avoid the mess beneath him. He let out a sound as he felt Die filling him, using his body to milk his lover. Already, he was feeling lighter and more like himself. 

The moment he was done, Die whimpered softly and slipped his arm around the other's midsection. He rested his forehead against the other's shoulder, panting softly. "Better?" he asked softly.

Kyo reached back to thread his fingers in Die's hair, letting out a soft sound. "A lot, actually. Thank you." 

Die slowly pulled out and then settled back, licking his lips a little. "Good." He smiled and reached to gently pat Kyo's ass.

Kyo grunted as Die pulled out, feeling slight pain, but nothing he couldn't handle. He turned and leaned in, kissing Die deeply. He pulled away with a sigh and looked around, wrinkling his nose. "Guess we better clean up before someone comes looking for us..." 

Die shifted a little and allowed Kyo to sit up. "Or we could let them see it," he murmured softly, laughing a moment after. He moved back and started to get his clothing back in order.

Kyo smirked and nipped Die's bottom lip. "I'm sure it wouldn't be the first mess they've come across..." He stood up, wincing a little as soreness settled in. He glanced down at his stomach and ran a finger over one of Die's scratches that had broken the skin, a slight shiver going through him. "Very nice..."

Die grinned at him and then shrugged. "Couldn't help myself... what can I say?" Die was quiet for a moment and then, finally, stood up. "I'll clean this up, you get cleaned up yourself, hmm?"

Kyo nodded and simply got all of his clothing back on, leaving the room to go and get himself fully back in order.


	16. Chapter 16

Die shifted his weight from foot-to-foot, licking his lips a little as he fished out his electronic cigarette. He pushed one hand through his hair, smiling as a few straggling fans made their way past the bus, waving a bit as they left. He lifted one hand in parting, and then checked the fluid level on his cigarette before turning it on and taking a drag from it.

Kyo had been hiding in the bus for a while after the show, waiting on everything to settle down. He kept peering out the window and when there appeared to finally be only staff and band members present, he slipped off the bus and moved to stand by Die. Gesturing towards the electronic cigarette, he asked, "How is that thing?" 

Die smirked a little when Kyo came out, holding it out to him at the question. "Here. This one doesn't have any nicotine in it anyway and it's just vapor, won't hurt a thing."

Kyo took it and pulled in a drag from it, humming in appreciation at the menthol flavor that filled his mouth. He blew out the smoke-like vapor and smiled, watching it curl into the night air then disappear. "Nice..." 

"It is nice. Same feel as the cigarette and none of the addicting, harmful shit." His eyes landed on the other's mouth as the vapor disappeared into the night air, licking his lips a little at the sight.

The vocalist nodded and took another, longer drag, smirking ever so slightly as he let the vapor slide out between his lips slowly, fixing Die with a dark look. 

Die felt heat spiral down toward his groin as he stared at the other man's lips while he smoked the cigarette. Finally, he looked away with a low groan, leaning back against the side of the bus and closing his eyes. "You taunt me without trying."

Kyo blew out his current mouthful of vapor and chuckled lowly. "Who said I wasn't trying?" He shifted his weight and rested his shoulder against the bus, facing his lover. In a low tone, he murmured, "It's been too long."

"Oh?" he chuckled a bit, "Mmm... well, then it was working for sure." He moved his hand up to rub over his nose and then sniffed. "It has been."

Kyo let out a huff then pushed himself upright, licking his lips. "If I thought we could get away with it, I'd take your ass, right here against the bus." He smirked then took another puff off the fake cigarette, finding that he enjoyed it quite a bit. 

Die inclined his head toward the sky, a little smile on his lips. "You so would... and knowing that you would makes it all that much better to just be standing here, even if we can't."

He laughed then looked around them, noting that the only people around were a few staff members, who were not paying attention. After a few moments consideration, he took the step that closed the distance between him and Die and leaned up to press his lips to the other's upturned jaw. 

Die let out a little sound at the action. "Baby... you tempt me so friggin bad." He tilted his head a little and then murmured, "Need a fucking hotel room so goddamn bad."

"Consider it payback for all the damn tempting you do on stage. I find it difficult to keep my eyes to the front." Kyo snorted then looked around, chewing his bottom lip. "Yeah, we do, but we aren't scheduled to stop tonight." 

Die let out a groan and pushed away from the bus, his eyes darting up to the venue and then down the street. After a moment, he seemed to come up with an idea. "Truck stop... the showers for truckers. We'll use them, say we're too icky and suggest it and Nora will let us."

Kyo brought his hand up to run through his hair, wrinkling his nose at the stiffness he felt there. "Brilliant... and not entirely untrue." He pulled out his phone, shooting off a text to Nora, adding in something about the steam from the shower being helpful to his voice. It wasn't a full minute before he received one back, saying that she would make arrangements. "Done."

Die smirked a little. "Good... then we can fix a few things that way. We'll just take the handicap stall there." He reached over and took the cigarette from him, taking in a few drags and then turned it off and put it back in his pocket.

Kyo blew out his last mouthful of vapor then nodded. "Sounds like a plan." He shifted anxiously, already anticipating shoving Die against the shower wall. 

The guitarist glanced back toward the trailer, seeing them loading the last few pieces. "We're almost out of here," he murmured, pushing away from the bus and starting toward the door, intent on getting his bag ready for this.

Kyo nodded and followed Die, waving to the other three band members as he slipped onto the bus, heading straight towards the back to get his own bag and a change of clothes. 

Die quickly shoved a few items of clothing in a bag: a condom, some lube, and his shower bag. With that done, he settled down and started to clip his nails, nail file resting on his leg while he concentrated on getting the length right.

Kyo watched with some amusement as Die primped himself then glanced down at his own nails, huffing slightly and yanking the nail file from Die to smooth them out some so he wouldn't feel like he was tearing his lover's skin to shreds. 

Die glanced up at Kyo, smirking a bit at him before mouthing the words, "So considerate," chuckling a little just after and then yawning as he clipped the last one and scooped his clippings into a tiny pile.

Kyo snorted softly, tossing the file back at Die then leaning back, feigning a nap as the bus started rolling. He crossed his legs and arms, trying not to squirm. He prayed the truck stop was nearby and not like two hours down the road instead.

The guitarist caught the nail file and started to file his nails so there weren't any hangnails. He smirked a bit and then got up and put the file away and the clippings into the trash can. Plopping back down, he sighed softly and rubbed at his head a bit.

Kyo shifted and rubbed his arms a bit. He leaned closer to Die, murmuring, "I'm going to fuck you raw." 

"You'd better..." he whispered back, closing his eyes and letting his head hit the headrest behind him, "You'd fucking better."

Kyo let that thought tide him over as they rolled down the road, his own eyes slipping shut. After about twenty minutes, Nora came to the back area they were sitting in and informed them that they would stopping shortly, a knowing look on her face as she moved back towards the front. "Finally..." Kyo picked up his bag, slinging it over his shoulder and moving to peer out the window, the lights of the truck stop filtering in. 

Die picked up his bag as well and bit on his lip a little, anticipating so much of what was coming. He paused by his bunk and dug around; finally pulling out a small waterproof vibrator, thinking Kyo might find it amusing at the least... if he had the balls to bring it out. He shoved it in the bag and then headed after Kyo, feeling the bus come to a complete stop.

Kyo didn't look back as he stepped off the bus, sure Die was following him. He made his way inside and to the waiting area, letting Nora take care of payments. A few minutes passed them by and rather rapidly, Daisuke was called over the speakers, followed by, "Your shower is ready." He stepped in and found the largest stall, he moved into it and waited for Die to join him, thankful the place was empty. 

Die trudged in after Kyo, glad that it wasn't the kind where they had to go to a specific stall once their name was announced. That would have been awkward for them to get into the stalls together. He quickly got undressed next to the little bench and grabbed the mesh bag with all the things in it he'd need, laying his towel on top of his belongings. He peered under the stall, seeing Kyo's feet and legs, and then joining him in the shower.

Kyo grinned as Die joined him then moved over to the faucet, turning it on warm then angling the spray so they both could wash without being in each other's way. "This is nice." He chuckled and grabbed up his shampoo that he'd brought with him, starting to soap up his hair. 

Die stared at Kyo as he started to wash off, his eyes burning with something far more than just his usual lusty look. He grabbed his wrists and pushed him back against the wall, sealing his mouth over the other man's, grinding his lower half against him urgently. Washing was far from his mind and he wanted to make that perfectly clear to Kyo.

Kyo had about a second to see the way Die was staring at him before he was pinned against the wall. His first instinct was to fight, squirming against Die then groaning into his mouth as the other ground against him, sending shocks of pleasure coursing through his body. 

Die kissed him until he couldn't stand it anymore, pulling back to take in a large lungful of air, tugging Kyo to where he could rinse his hair out. "Shower later, fuck now," he hissed out in an almost desperate sort of manner.

Kyo grunted then quickly rinsed the soap from his hair before turning on Die, shoving him roughly against the wall and resuming their kiss, pushing his tongue into the guitarist's mouth. When he pulled away, he was slightly breathless. "Lube's in my bag... get it. Unless you want me to fuck you without." 

Die arched toward Kyo as he was pushed against the wall. He grunted a little when the other told him about lube. He grabbed his bag from where he'd placed it on the ledge and shoved a tube of lube into the other's hands. "Condom in there if you want it, too." He almost hoped he did, wanted him to find the vibrator if nothing else.

Kyo took the lube then smirked, moving to dig for the condom as well, knowing the slickness of it would speed things up. As he was searching for the familiar foil package, his hand brushed over something else and he pulled it out, discovering a waterproof vibe. He let out a low chuckle and brought it back over to Die. "Been shopping have you?" 

Die raised his gaze to Kyo's own as he found the vibrator. He allowed his lips to turn up in a little grin. "Whatever am I supposed to do without you to fulfill me on all these long, lonely nights?" He reached down to stroke over his own erection, grunting a bit as he worked it to full hardness, hoping Kyo would enjoy the show of it. "I had to find something to help me, baby."

Kyo watched Die stroke himself with lust burning in his eyes. His own cock was twitching and he reached down to almost idly stroke it. "Show me... prep yourself with it." 

Die swallowed a bit, reaching to take it from the other. He grabbed the little red vibe and licked over his lips as he held it out to Kyo. "Lube me up, baby."

Kyo popped the top on the lube and reached out, squirting a good amount onto the tip of the vibe then setting the lube on the little shelf in the shower stall before moving over to Die, running his hand down his chest, unable to resist touching him. 

Die debated what to do with the fact that he wasn't laying down right then. Finally, he murmured, "Baby, hold my leg." He lifted up a leg and waited until Kyo had hold of it before leaning against the wall more fully and reaching down to put the vibe against himself. He pushed the top to turn it on and groaned as it started to relax him enough to slide in.

Kyo chuckled and held Die's leg, watching his actions with the vibe and groaning a little. "Even like this, you're still so goddamned sexy, baby." 

Die humped up toward Kyo, whimpering a little bit. "Thank you," he breathed out. After a moment or so, he pushed it in and started to thrust it. "Oh god!" he whispered softly. 

As Kyo watched Die, he groaned softly, shifting closer and reaching down to wrap his fingers around Die's cock, stroking lightly. The position was awkward, but he kept hold of Die's leg, eventually shifting a bit to use the wall for support. "Fuck, Die... is this what you do when I'm not around? Tease yourself like this?" 

Die's hair fell down in his face, shielding him from Kyo's direct gaze. He let out the softest of moans, still plunging the vibe in and out of himself, enjoying the slim, slick feel of it going in and out of his body. "I do... always," he murmured.

Kyo let out a low sound, his cock throbbing as his mind provided him with a mental image of Die writhing on their bed, pumping the vibe into himself. After another moment, he couldn't stand it and leaned in a bit to press his erection against Die's thigh, groaning. "You've got me so damn hard." 

Die grunted a bit, pulling the vibe out of his ass. He slid it up over his balls and then across the base of his dick with a soft groan. "Kyo... take me. Make me fucking cum already."

Kyo took the vibe away from Die and set it on the shelf with the other things then grabbed the condom, slipping it on quickly before grabbing Die and turning him around, pushing him to bend over. He grasped Die's hips, positioned himself, then pushed into his body with one thrust, moaning as tight heat enveloped him. "Fuck _yes_!" 

Die pressed himself against the wall and groaned as Kyo pushed into his body. He arched his back, causing his ass to present a bit more fully to Kyo. "Come on, baby... fuck me hard."

Kyo growled and quickly started thrusting into Die with short, hard thrusts, building a fast pace. The sound of their joining filled the shower area with lewd, wet slapping sounds. 

There was a soft cough from the next stall over and Die let out a little gasp. "I... a-ah!" He groaned softly, trying to thrust back toward him.

Kyo snickered softly, pushing that much harder into Die's body, groaning. "Your ass is so fucking hot." 

Die let out a tiny sound, his dick incredibly hard, the head of it ruddy with his desire. "Fuck me harder!" He already felt like he was gonna cum and he just wanted it hard enough to manage it.

Kyo growled and shifted them both, pulling Die's hips back some then bending his knees before slamming into him impossibly hard, fingertips digging into Die's skin hard enough that he was sure there'd be bruises later. "Fuck yes!" 

Die let out a strangled cry and started to spurt his cum out over the wall in front of him, unable to even remotely slow it down. He whimpered a bit, hanging his head down, panting.

Kyo's kept up the pace as Die came, thrusting into his clenching body until he couldn't stand it anymore and pulled out, yanking the condom off then thrusting into Die's body once more before cumming inside him with a low moan. 

Die let out a startled cry, feeling the other's cock plunge back into him. He let out a little whimper, pushing back toward him while he started to cum in his ass.

Kyo finally stilled and put his hands on either side of Die's head, bracing himself as he panted harshly. "God..." He rested his forehead against Die's back, groaning softly. "You are... amazing." 

"No... you are," Die murmured softly. He let out a tiny chuckle. "Who just got a show?" he asked quietly.

Kyo found himself flushing a little and shook his head, murmuring, "Not sure." 

Shinya cleared his throat and sighed. "I did, thank you very much." He sounded more amused than annoyed though. "I would have left and come back later, but I was already in here when I realized what was going on." With that, he grabbed up his stuff and disappeared from the showers, leaving them alone.

Kyo winced slightly and made a mental note to make it up to the drummer later. Maybe he'd buy him some fancy bubble bath or something. 

Die gasped as their question was answered by Shinya. Out of all the people he'd expected, it hadn't been Shinya. He blushed and then let out a soft groan. "Oh man... we owe him on that one." He turned off the vibe and moved to wash it off.

Kyo huffed and moved away from Die, smirking as his cum dripped out of the other's ass. "Yeah, I suppose so. I didn't even hear him come in." He wrinkled his nose then moved under the spray once more, turning it more towards hot. 

"He's always quiet," he murmured, carefully moving under the spray and starting to wash his body off. "But... it's okay, I needed you so bad, it doesn't matter."

Kyo nodded in agreement then smiled softly, feeling less sexually charged and more just exhausted now, but in a good way. "I always need you." He paused for a moment to lean over and kiss Die's shoulder. 

Die smiled, tilting his head a little and reaching to put some soap bubbles on Kyo's nose, winking at him as he did it.

Kyo wrinkled his nose and flailed a bit at Die. "Oi!" He leaned his face into the water to wash them off, then goosed Die's ass for good measure. 

Die yelped a bit and then chuckled. "Mmm... you're amazing, you know that?"

Kyo grinned and hung his head slightly before slipping his arms around Die's waist, pulling him close. "You're lying... but I love you anyway." 

"I'm not lying at all. I'd never lie to you." Die rubbed over his lover's back gently. "And I love you, too."

Kyo hummed softly, nuzzling into his neck. "You make me all warm and fuzzy, stop it." He smiled against Die's skin. No matter how much he grumbled, he truly loved their sweet moments after sex. 

Die kissed his cheek and rubbed over his hair. "Let's finish up so we don't keep everyone forever and so Toshiya and Kaoru aren't afraid to come in here." He laughed softly, reaching for his soap.

Kyo snorted and nodded, grabbing his soap again, starting to wash off. "I wonder if they'll shower together...."

"Mmm... wouldn't put it past them." Die smirked a bit and finished up washing, quickly getting his hair washed as well.

Kyo shrugged and moved under the spray to rinse off, taking a moment to stand there and let it hit the back of his neck with a sigh. "I dunno, I'm not even sure they've gotten past the awkward cuddling stage."

Die chuckled. "That's true, we have no proof. But... both of them are so fucking horny, I'm sure they might have done something at least."

Kyo laughed. "Maybe so...I dunno. I'm just glad Kaoru's off our case." He grinned and ran his hands over Die's hips before moving out of the spray and to the other side of the stall to grab his towel, starting to dry off while Die finished up. "In other news, I am so ready to be home."

Die nodded a little. "Home would be nice at this point." He sort of leaned toward Kyo, pursing his lips a little, wondering how the last few dates were going to go. He honestly was worried about Kyo by this point, though he wasn't saying anything because he didn't want to make him upset. On the other end, he sort of wondered if anyone was going to remember his birthday this year.

Kyo offered Die a smile, then went about drying off, brushing his teeth and such, missing the look on his lover's face. He made one of his own as he thought about going home and what all he needed to do once they were back in Japan. He was experiencing more and more pain with his throat as this tour went on and he was starting to worry about it. Of course, he wouldn't mention it to the others, especially Die. He hated to worry them.

Die watched Kyo wander around. He got up and followed after the other, doing his own cleaning up, shaving and brushing, and then combing his hair. He finished up as fast as he could, wandering off toward the shop area to try and get some beer for the night.

Kyo dressed then gathered their things, following Die into the shop afterwards. He wasn't interested in any of the snacks and moved over to the shelves of trinkets and souvenirs, reaching out to poke at a figure of a cat that supposedly was life-like, lost in his own thoughts.

Die checked out with a mini keg of Heineken and a refill for his vapor cigarette. He snuck in a bag of M&Ms and paid, wandering back out to the bus. He went to the back of the bus and settled down with his beer, grabbing a can and popping it open.

Kyo finally went and grabbed a couple of cold teas and bought them, struggling a little with the money and language, but managing it. He made his way back to the bus, feeling exhausted now after the show, his and Die's activities in the shower, and his sudden downturn in mood. Letting out a huff as he boarded the bus and went to the back where Die was, curling up next to him before laying his head on his shoulder. "Nice keg..."

Die smirked a little as Kyo came and settled down next to him. He took another swig from the can and then licked his lips. "Yeah... I thought it'd be a nice touch after the show tomorrow."

Kyo hummed and opened up one of the teas he'd gotten, sipping and making a face. "Ugh, way, way too sweet." He sighed and set it down. 

Die let out a little huff and then pointed toward a spare cup and a tea bag. "Make another cup and split it with the other one."  
Kyo looked at the cup and considered it before shrugging and waving his hand, digging into the bag for the other one which was a different brand and had honey in it. He opened it and sipped it, look faintly relieved. "This one is better." Tea crisis averted, he settled back against Die, closing his eyes. 

Die made a little sound and then chuckled, settling back and closing his eyes. "Good. Sucks to pay for things that you don't like. Try giving it to Toshiya, I think he might not mind it being sweeter, then at least it's not wasted."

Kyo shrugged some. "I can't be bothered to get up right now. I'll ask him later." He yawned and shifted some, getting more comfortable then pulling out his phone to check the time, smirking a little as he noticed that it was 11:58, two minutes until it would be Die's birthday. 

Die licked his lips again, finishing off the can of beer and then setting it down on the table with a burp. "Mmm... I think I need to take a whizz." He stretched a bit and started to get up.

Kyo bit his lip then reached out to grab Die's hand, stopping him. "Wait a minute?"

Die arched his eyebrow at Kyo and then settled again. "Mmm... okay," he smirked and reached to run his hand over Kyo's back.

Kyo glanced at his phone's clock once again then turned and cupped Die's face, kissing him softly. "Happy Birthday, baby." 

Die looked a bit surprised, letting out a tiny gasp. He beamed at Kyo. "Thank you, baby, you're amazing.

Kyo smiled and shrugged. "How could I forget your birthday?" He placed another small kiss to Die's lips then pulled back. "As a present, I'll sing any song tomorrow night you want me to..." He knew such a thing could be a challenge but he wanted to make Die happy in a way that physical gifts wouldn't. 

Die debated it for a moment, trying to decide what he wanted the other to sing for him the next night. "Ruten no Tou," he murmured softly, "I think I'd like to hear you try that again... but... you have to convince Kaoru to add it in."

Kyo thought about it for a moment then nodded, smiling. "I'll see what I can do... he shouldn't have too much of an issue with it... but you never know with him." 

Die smiled and shifted closer to his baby, holding him around the waist. "Mmm... you're amazing." He reached to push Kyo's hair back from his forehead. "So... was the bathroom thing intentional or... just a side-effect?"

Kyo nuzzled into Die's touch, then let out a chuckle. "Partially intentional, you're cute when you squirm... but the timing just happened to be right." 

Die chuckled, reaching to tug Kyo's hair a little before he made to get up, seeing if Kyo was going to stop him again or not.

Kyo huffed at the hair tug then smirked, putting his hand on Die's thigh. "How bad you gotta go?" 

Die paused, halfway out of his chair. He gave a little shrug. "Like... normal?"

Kyo hummed, wondering where the line was and how much Die could take and even if he'd enjoy this sort of game. "Wait..." 

Die's eyes sparkled a bit as he sat back down, wondering where Kyo had managed to pull this one from. He wondered, too, if he knew how far to push it. He supposed he'd find out. "Very well," he murmured, shifting closer to Kyo and leaning on him a bit. "Hand me another beer will you?" he pointed to the half empty twelve-pack under the table near Kyo's feet.

Kyo grinned a bit then reached to get Die his beer. He knew it must seem like this was coming out of nowhere, but over the past week or so, Kyo had been surfing fetish sites, looking for something different to do for Die's birthday that they might could get away with. He hadn't turned up much, but this had been one of the suggestions. 

Die took the proffered beer and popped it open, taking a healthy swig of it before putting it on the table and rooting through his bag. He came up with the bottle of solution for the e-cig and fished out the cigarette, putting the solution in and offering it to Kyo. "Mint chocolate chip... sounds terrible, but so good."

Kyo watched with interest as Die prepared the cigarette then took it with a skeptical look. "Mint chocolate chip?" He raised an eyebrow then took a puff, wincing when the vapor and air hit his throat wrong, sending him into a coughing fit. 

Die peered at the other and then frowned, taking it back and lightly rubbing his lover's back. "I'm sorry, baby, I didn't mean to make you end up coughing!" He reached for a water and shoved it toward Kyo, not sure what else to do.

Kyo shook his head, coughing a bit more before finally getting it under control, taking the water and drinking it. He finally let out a sigh, looking almost embarrassed. "No, it just hit wrong."

Die patted his back a bit and then shrugged. "If you're sure, then... good." He leaned back in closer to him and took a drag of it himself.

Kyo nodded then leaned into Die, hiding the look of pain on his face. After a moment, he licked his lips and spoke again. "The flavor was surprisingly good though... tasted like the ice cream." 

Die nodded. "It does..." he still suspected something more was going on, but he didn't really feel like pushing it, especially on his birthday. Maybe things weren't as bad as he was thinking they were... maybe he could ignore it just a little longer.

After a few minutes of silence, he reached over and placed his hand on Die's stomach, pressing slightly. He wanted to forget his own issues for the moment and continue on with their little game. 

Die let out a little gasp and sort of pushed into the touch, a blush on his face from the pure idea of Kyo enjoying him like this. "Mmm..." he shifted slightly and started to sip at his beer again.

Thankful the others on the bus were either asleep or otherwise occupied, the vocalist shifted and placed a few light kisses to Die's neck. "If we were home, I would have you let it go _anywhere_ you wanted... even the carpet or bed." 

Die groaned faintly, closing his eyes. He imagined it and found himself becoming quickly aroused, which would only help him with the whole holding idea of their session, that was for certain.

Kyo chuckled and pressed against Die's stomach again, a little harder this time then let his hand dip downward, brushing over his crotch before pulling back and resettling himself against his lover. 

Die almost wanted to choke on his beer as Kyo groped at him. This... this was pleasant, for sure. He smirked a bit. "Mmm... baby," he murmured.

The shorter smirked up at Die, letting his hand run idly over his thigh. "I have a confession....I _love_ teasing you." 

Die's cheeks flushed a bit and he pursed his lips. After a moment, he murmured, "You know... I love you teasing me, too."

Kyo responded by moving his hand up higher and cupping Die's length, pressing against it with his palm. "Good..." 

Die's hips pushed up involuntarily, a little groan leaving his lips as he tried to rub up against Kyo's hand. He glanced at him and then smirked, "C'mon, baby... take it out and jerk me off."

Kyo looked up at Die, licking his lips. "Well, since you asked so nicely..." He waited a moment, teasing Die some more before shifting and unzipping the other's pants, freeing his length from the confines of his boxers. He swirled his thumb over the head then started slowly jerking Die off, mming softly. 

Die started pushing up into Kyo's touches, whimpering a little as he felt the other's touch on his dick. When Kyo's full palm slid around him, he let out a groan that was purely and entirely erotic, his head falling back, beer clutched tightly in his hand.

Kyo's arousal spiked as Die started making the most delicious of noises and he sped up his strokes, seeking more of the sounds despite the fact that they would easily be overheard. 

Die could already feel his excitement ramping up, his heart thudding in his chest as the other jerked him off right where anyone could see him. He pursed his lips, letting out another little whimper.

A loud gasp was heard and then the sound of someone clearing their throat. Something slid onto the table and he looked up to see the other three gathered around, a small cake on the table.

Kaoru cleared his throat, looking away. "Um... happy birthday... and it appears we have poor timing."

Kyo was about to lean in to attack Die's neck again when someone gasping made him nearly jump out of his skin. He flushed a bit and quickly let go of Die's dick, yanking his nearby hoodie over it for the moment. "Erm..." He coughed a bit then scratched his head. "Nice cake," he offered lamely. 

Toshiya just stood their laughing into his hand, finding the whole situation rather amusing. "Ha... looks like you were getting an early gift, eh?" He winked dramatically. 

Shinya, on the other hand, was politely staring in the opposite direction. He cleared his throat then spoke. "Sorry to interrupt you two, we can wait a few minutes.." 

Die coughed a bit and then murmured softly, "Um... it's- it's okay. Honestly, um... well, it was past midnight!" He flushed, pushing the hoodie down so it was covering his junk a bit better. He sniffed and shifted uncomfortably but then spied the cake again and beamed. "You all remembered so early into the day!" His smile could have lit the room.

Kaoru shifted from foot-to-foot. "Um... yeah, you think we'd forget you? We never have when we're all together, Die."

Kyo got over his embarrassment as he watched Die light up, reaching out to take his hand then grin up at the others. "You guys could've included me."

Toshiya waved his hand and beamed at Die. "Why do you always think we'll forget? We haven't yet!" 

Kaoru glanced at Kyo and shrugged in a sort of apologetic manner. "We didn't because we knew you'd have plans of your own... or hoped... and obviously we were right. Maybe some communication would have been better." He glanced away again, a bit nervous to have seen what he had with Toshiya's prior issues with what he'd done.

Die looked between them all and then quietly offered, "Thank you so much..." He shifted around under the hoodie, trying to get his dick back in his pants, which was honestly a bit more effort than it was worth, causing him to curse under his breath.

Kyo peered up at Kaoru then shrugged. "Perhaps, but honestly, this was sort of spur of the moment." He glanced over at Die then coughed, standing up and shielding him from view for a moment. "Next time though..." he stood there a bit awkwardly before speaking again. "By the way, Kao, can we add "Ruten no Tou" to tomorrow's show?" 

Toshiya took great joy in sniggering at Die's trouble, knowing it had to be a pain in the ass to deal with. He was completely oblivious of Kaoru's discomfort with the situation. 

Die glowered a bit at Toshiya's reaction, shifting behind Kyo's makeshift shield and pushing the hoodie out of the way to lift up a bit and tuck himself back in the proper way. He managed to get zipped back up and shoved the hoodie back over his crotch since he still had an enormous tent in his pants.

Kaoru glanced at Kyo and nodded a bit. "Yeah, sure... sure... I'll slip it in somewhere." He glanced at Die and his face went a bit red. Flustered, he mumbled something about doing that now and went quickly toward the back of the bus.

Kyo nodded then glanced back at Die, seeing that he was covered. He sat down as Kaoru took off, raising an eyebrow. "What? No cake?" 

Toshiya stopped laughing and peered after Kaoru, frowning the slightest bit. "Be right back guys, go ahead with the cake!" With that, he took off after Kaoru, finding him and placing a hand on his shoulder. "Hey... what's up?"

Shinya was rather unaffected by the whole situation and just shrugged, getting out the plastic knife they'd brought along to cut the cake, going about sectioning it into perfectly even pieces. "This is why it is so much easier to not date within the band... or business for that matter." 

Die arched an eyebrow at the other and then murmured, "One cannot help what the heart wants, Shinya. And I'll have you know it's been a long time coming between me and Kyo. I've had it bad for him for a long time." He reached to scoop some icing off the piece he deemed as his own, sticking his finger in his mouth.

Kyo took his piece and halved it, scooping it onto Die's plate before digging into what was left. "It is a struggle sometimes for sure but as Die said, it's been a long time coming and it was really unavoidable..." He let his leg brush against Die's, a tender look in his eyes. 

Shinya tasked and waved his hand. "I suppose so, but still, it just seems too sticky for me..." He shrugged his shoulder then started to eat his cake, focusing more on it than Die and Kyo. 

Kaoru had reached his bunk and started digging around for paper and pen. He damn near jumped when Toshiya touched his shoulder and stared at him with wide eyes for a moment, knowing his embarrassed flush probably told his entire story. He sighed and looked away. "Saw too much... I'm sorry."

Toshiya bit his lip and lightly rubbed Kaoru's shoulder. "It's okay, really. Why are you so embarrassed by it? We all got a good eyeful of Die cock..." 

Kaoru peered back at Toshiya and then looked down at his bag, finally finding a pen. "...Because of the other night. No more wrong ideas... you know?"

Toshiya blinked at Kaoru a bit then made an, "Oh," face before smiling and patting Kaoru's back. "Oh, no, I get it. It's fine... seriously." He was rather relieved that that was all there was to it and not anything else. 

Kaoru pulled himself upright and leaned against the side of the bunk, studying Toshiya to make sure he wasn't pissed off. That wasn't going to be a good thing if he was, that much was for certain.

Toshiya looked at Kaoru, chewing his bottom lip a bit. "I really am sorry I totally overreacted the other night, but honestly, I was pretty damn smashed." He wanted to put any worries the other had to rest. 

Kaoru stared at Toshiya, his eyes filled with emotions. He shrugged slightly and then smoothed out his shirt. "It's okay... I understand where you're coming from." It just had him running like a scared rabbit, that was all.

Toshiya nodded then looked away before glancing back at Kaoru, feeling shy. They were technically together at this point but had yet to do anything remotely relationship like, including kiss. He shrugged his shoulders then gestured toward the area the rest of the band were. "I think we should skip on the cake, yeah?" 

Die grabbed his piece of cake and stabbed a fork into it, starting to eat it rather quickly. He was feeling two urgent needs and neither was going to go over well with any of the others hanging around. But he had a feeling he was going to have to put up with them for a while before cake-time was done.

Kyo, having the smallest piece of cake, finished his off first then leaned back against the couch, watching the others eat. He glanced at Die from the corner of his eye, wondering how his lover was fairing at the moment. 

Shinya wasn't blind to the situation, but didn't want to run off either, so he sat there eating his cake for the time being. "So, Ruten no Tou, huh? Your request, Die?" 

Die glanced up at Shinya and nodded a little. "Yeah... that obvious?" He smirked slightly, polishing off his cake and putting his fork down after giving it a good licking.

Shinya shrugged a little and smiled. "I've seen the way you get into that one..." He finished his cake then sat back, feeling a bit caught between the two couples. God only knew what Kaoru and Toshiya were up to now.

Die nodded a little and looked over at Kyo, then back at Shinya. "Thank you guys for the cake." He smiled and shifted slightly, the urge to pee hitting him a bit harder as his dick began to go flaccid. He put his hand on Kyo's thigh under the table and squeezed a bit, trying to let him know how he was being affected.

Shinya, not knowing about Die's full bladder or anything and just assuming that Die and Kyo could resume their activities later, made himself comfortable and peered at them both. "So, this has been one eventful tour..."

Kyo smirked slightly when he felt Die's hand on his thigh, subtly reaching down and placing his own over it, patting lightly. He knew from the way Die was squirming that he was probably getting pretty damn desperate by now, but the sadist in him loved it. 

Die stared at Shinya, coughing a bit into his hand, trying to hide the pure horror he felt at the fact that the other was sticking around while he and Kyo were playing this twisted fetish game. He squirmed a bit and glanced at the drummer. "Yeah... very, very eventful... insanely so, in fact." He turned his hand over to hold Kyo's, squeezing a bit once again.

Kaoru bit his lip a slightly, a look of curiosity on his face at the way the other was staring at him. After a moment, he glanced back toward the others and then to Toshiya. Without a second thought, he grabbed the other, pulling him forward by the front of his shirt, hand sliding up into his hair. He tugged him against his body and leaned in to kiss him, grunting faintly as their lips contacted with one another.

Toshiya could only gasp as Kaoru grabbed him by the shirt, hands flailing a bit as the action threatened to throw him off balance. When their lips met, he melted into Kaoru's embrace, tingles going down his spine as he parted his lips, clearly eager for more. 

Kaoru grunted softly into the kiss as he pushed Toshiya back against the bunk wall, grinding up against him a bit as he kissed him, clearly way too fucking hard up for his own good. His tongue slid out across Toshiya's lips, tasting him for the first time, a thrill slipping through his body. It was as good as he'd thought it would be. He pulled back a moment later though, knowing he was going to be labeled as a tease and he groaned a little, pushing his own hand through his hair. "Oh man..." he murmured.

Toshiya let out a whine as Kaoru grinded against him, the action causing fire to rush to his groin. He reached out to cling to the guitarist, flicking his own tongue out to tease at Kaoru's, moaning softly. The other pulling back only left him standing there, panting slightly as he stared at him with wide eyes, bright with arousal and emotion. "O-oh..." 

Kaoru blinked a bit at the other, a flush shifting through his body. "Um... I think... we can be clear on the chemistry thing now." He let out a shaky little laugh, uncertain how to let on that he wasn't intending to go further just yet, but that he was, in fact, quite aroused by even just the kiss.

Toshiya let out a laugh then ran his fingers through Kaoru's hair. "You think...?" He knew the other was still hesitant, but part of him desperately wanted to shove him into his bunk and show him that it would all be okay. 

Kaoru smiled softly, glancing away and backing up another step. He was too on edge to let things continue right then or he'd be soiling a perfectly good pair of underwear without meaning to. He hated to admit it, but he was horny as hell from just a kiss and that was just damn sad. He glanced back at the others. "I really do want a piece of cake and it looks like Shin cut us off some."

Toshiya hesitated a bit then leaned in to kiss Kaoru's cheek then nodded. "Yeah, okay, cake then..." He smiled and moved towards where the other guys were, knowing his cheeks were quite flushed.

Shinya crossed his arms and nodded. "I think the fans have become quite a bit attached to our meet and greet packages though I heard a few of them saying they preferred the more intimate atmosphere of special winners and such, which I can understand." 

Kyo wanted to laugh as Shinya continued on about the tour, nodding his head in agreement. "Yeah, I suppose so. I find it stressful at times, but I do enjoy meeting everyone." He squeezed Die's hand particularly hard as the conversation went on, knowing his lover was probably to the breaking point. 

Die made a little face. "But that'd disappoint so many other people. It'd be unfair." He sniffed a little and sighed, leaning on the table, thinking to himself how he would feel if his favorite bands did that to him after giving him the opportunity in the past. It seemed cruel. He shifted slightly, wincing as the shift put pressure on his bladder. His free hand slipped down to press over his stomach, which was slightly distended at this point.

Shinya licked his lips, reaching out to pluck a small bite of cake off the plate. "Yeah, it would be unfair. I like that this gives everyone a chance, though the business side of it puts a bad taste in my mouth, but you can't get around that." 

Kyo sniffed and nodded. "Yeah, it would be difficult..." He shifted slightly, taking a moment that Shinya was looking at something else to slip his hand over Die's crotch, pressing a little harshly then relaxing again as the drummer looked their way. 

Die damn near yelped as Kyo put his hand over his crotch. He grabbed his hand and put it over his belly, letting him feel how full his bladder was. He shifted again, shivering slightly and crossing one slim leg over the other, ducking his head to hide the look of distress on his face. After a moment, he gathered himself again and smiled at Shinya. "Where'd you find the cake?"

Shinya chuckled at the question. "Walmart, actually. We got it yesterday and kept it hidden." 

Kyo smirked to himself, rubbing over Die's stomach a bit before pushing then pulling his hand away completely, stretching some. "It's not bad for Walmart. Pretty good actually..." 

Die grunted a little, feeling a few drops of piss leak out from his dick into his underwear. Thankfully that wouldn't be noticeable at all and he ran a hand over his face to hide the grimace that accompanied the issue. He put his hands down and linked them on the table. He thought about getting up, unable to even talk right then with the battle waging below his belt.

Kyo noticed Die's actions and licked his lips, his own arousal spiking from it. He knew that Die was probably suffering quite a bit right now, but there wasn't much he could do about it without announcing to the rest of the band that he was going to piss himself. 

Kaoru headed back over and settled down on one of the open seats, taking his piece of cake and smiling fondly at the group of them. "You're all so wonderful to be around, you know that?" It was like he'd sprouted a third head it was so absurd for him to be thanking them like this.

Shinya kept going on about the tour and fans and such until Kaoru came back and spoke. At that point, he shut up and just stared at their leader like he was insane. "Thank you?"

Toshiya sat next to Kaoru, eyebrows raised at the guitarist's statement, a chuckle bubbling out. "Kaoru... did you hit your head back there?" 

Die arched an eyebrow at Kaoru, the shock of his statement, taking his mind off his bladder for the time being. He smirked slightly and licked his lips a little. "Yeah... hit your head real hard, didn't you?"

Kaoru glanced around and then glowered at Die for a moment. "What, I can't compliment you all on Die's birthday?"

Kyo chuckled softly and shook his head. "You can, but it is rather unusual..." He gave Kaoru and then Toshiya a knowing look, having a feeling that he knew exactly why their leader was so chipper. 

Shinya smiled then hid a yawn behind his hand. "Well, I think it is far past my bedtime. Happy Birthday... and you are all wonderful." He stood and bowed to them before turning and heading for his bunk. 

"As are you, Shinya. Thanks!" Die smiled a bit, watching the other wander off. He turned his attention to the other two. It wouldn't be so bad if he just wanted to get jerked off under the table. But having them sitting there while his 'big secret fetish' was brewing inside him was a whole other ballgame. He sniffed and wiped his hand over his nose, shifting again.

Toshiya reached out and patted Kaoru's back, beaming at him. "Ah Leader-sama, your joy is a foreign concept to us!" 

Kaoru rolled his eyes at them and then shrugged. "Just happy is all... really... happy." He took a huge bite of his cake, determined to eat it all.

Toshiya felt his cheeks warm a bit as Kaoru admitted to being so happy, joy welling up inside him as he felt that he was partly responsible for it. He picked up his own piece of cake and dug in, smiling. "I wanted to get you the Hello Kitty cake they had but they said no..." 

Kyo waved to Shinya then glanced at Die from the corner of his eye, noting that he seemed more and more distressed at this point. He shifted and dropped his hands into his lap, holding them there a moment before slipping one onto Die's thigh, squeezing. "Hello Kitty... that would've been amusing."

Die let out a laugh, regretting it immediately as he spurted out a little more piss into his underwear from the tightening of his abdomen. If he completely lost it in front of friends and coworkers this was going to be really bad. But he also knew if he tried to get up, Kyo would stop him. The glinting in the other's eyes told him that quite clearly, along with the hand on his thigh.

Kaoru glanced between everyone at the table, his eyes coming back to Die. "You okay? Pull a muscle or something tonight?" He hated the idea of Die doing something like that with only a few dates left.

Kyo could only smirk as Die struggled to keep it all in. He felt a bit cruel at this point and hadn't intended on making him wait so long, but the rest of the band had forced the situation to be drawn out. 

Toshiya was lost in thought, but when Kaoru asked Die about his pulled muscle, he turned towards the other guitarist, a look of concern on his face. 

Die wanted to melt into the floor at that point. He tried to put on his best face and then sighed. "Um... I just..." then it hit him, he could just say his dick was still hard, they'd all seen it anyway and it didn't give away his fetish. "My dick's pushing on my clothing and it sort of hurts, that's all." He shrugged.

Kaoru choked a bit as Die pretty much told them he was still hard. He shoved the last bite of cake into his mouth and stood up. "I uh... completely forgot about that. I'm sorry, Die, that's cruel of us."

Kyo almost let out a laugh at Die's excuse, bringing his hand up to his mouth, coughing to cover it up. 

Toshiya did choke, coughing a bit at the piece of cake he nearly inhaled then standing up too. "Oh, yeah... well, happy birthday then." He grinned, then grabbed Kaoru's wrist, pulling him away and back to the bunk area. 

Kaoru stumbled off after Toshiya, flushing a bit as they vacated the area, embarrassed by what they'd interrupted.

Die, on the other hand, breathed a sigh of relief once they were gone and shoved the hoodie off his crotch. "Fuck," he hissed out, "Kyo, I have to go _so fucking bad_." He turned desperate eyes on him and then huffed out something that was supposed to be a laugh. "Are my eyeballs yellow yet? Because fuck!"

Kyo waited until the others were gone before moving and straddling Die's lap, hands pinning his shoulders back. "No, but your pants are about to be. How bad do you have to go, Die?" He shifted forward, pressing into Die some, showing him that he was still rather aroused at this point.

Die let out a whimper as Kyo mounted him. Normally, he'd have been all for this, but he didn't know how he felt about pissing himself in the middle of the bus when the others could probably hear, smell, and possibly walk in on it. But the feeling of Kyo's cock pressing against him shut that part of him up real quick. If Kyo was enjoying his fetish like this, then so be it. "So fucking bad," he murmured softly.

Kyo leaned down and pressed his lips to Die's for a quick, rough kiss then pulled back, his eyes dark. "Do it, Die... piss your fucking pants... right here, right now." He felt a thrill go through him, his hips bucking against Die slightly before he moved back a little. It was a risky thing, but that was probably half of why it was getting him so riled up. 

Die stared up at Kyo, his heart pounding in his chest. Somehow, he'd envisioned this going a bit differently in his head. He'd assumed if he did end up with an accident, it'd truly be an accident, on the way to take care of his problem. But instead, Kyo was turning into an on-purpose. He supposed, that made it better... easier. He could blame it on that instead of on not being able to hold it any longer. He pushed his hips up a little and whispered, "I lost a little bit already... not on purpose," just to see how Kyo would react.

Kyo narrowed his eyes at Die's confession then reached down with his hand, running it over Die's jeans, finding the small wet spot there, tsking slightly as he pushed against Die's dick. "What if you'd lost it all? Pissed yourself while everyone was sitting there? How would you have felt?" 

"Humiliated," Die replied immediately, his cheeks flushing a bit as he pushed up toward Kyo's hand. That hand encouraged him though, made him think if Kyo was going to have him be dirty, he'd pay for it with at least a wet hand. Determination set through him and he pushed out a rather large spurt, sure to soak his pants where Kyo was touching, an evil glint in his eyes.

Kyo opened his mouth to respond, to taunt Die a little more but snapped it shut as he felt the area his hand was currently touching become hot and wet. He narrowed his eyes and drew his hand back inspecting it then wiping it on the leg of Die's jeans. "That was uncalled for..." 

Die smirked at him. "Mmm... I beg to differ." He took Kyo's hand and pressed it back over his crotch. "It's just piss... and you asked for it. Besides... if I let go you'll have it all over your pants as well, you know." He arched into the touch, pushing Kyo's hand against his dick with a little moan.

Kyo grunted and shifted some, not too sure how he felt about ruined pants, but at the same time, if Die was going to suffer, he supposed he could as well and they would wash anyway. He rubbed his hand over Die's dick then leaned back a bit, revealing his tented pants. "You have me so goddamned hard right now."

Die let out a little groan, reaching to touch Kyo's dick through his pants. He could feel his own arousal stirring, but after a moment, he could tell that there was no way he was getting fully hard until he pissed. But he wanted to fuck so badly that he couldn't even help it. He shifted slightly and then yanked Kyo forward against him. Without a moment's more hesitation, he let go. It all rushed from him so quickly that he could hear the steady hissing of it as it came out of his body. He let out a throaty moan as he felt his pants grow warm and wet, piss cascading down his crotch and pooling under him on the seat. It trickled down the legs of his pants and dripped off onto the floor. It just kept coming, so much of it when it wasn't going into the toilet, making a total mess over the pair of them. He reached between them, unfastening his pants quickly and taking his cock out, pushing out the last few spurts of it over the front of Kyo's pants, watching them darken and imagining the other pissing himself instead, his dick growing hard in his hand. "Oh _god_ ," he breathed out.

Kyo groaned as Die touched him then let out a sound of surprise as he was pulled forward. After barely a second, he felt and heard Die's piss flowing out of him then the unmistakable sound of it hitting the floor. He glanced down, watching it wet the front of Die's pants and pool in the seat with some amount of fascination and arousal. 

When Die unfastened his pants and pissed on his own, Kyo let out a groan, the warmth feeling good to his erection, despite where it was coming from. "Fuck, Die... look at the mess you made..." he reached out and smeared around a few droplets of piss that clung to the head of Die's dick. 

Die groaned, bucking into Kyo's touch. He couldn't help it, now he was just aroused as sin. He reached up, grabbing a handful of hair and yanked Kyo's neck back, licking up the column of it before he slid his hand around it, squeezing just slightly, knowing it'd set Kyo off. "You made me to do it... now you do it. You're in this with me, baby... in all the way."

Kyo shuddered as Die pulled his hair then licked his neck. He let out a groan as the other's hand slid around his neck, automatically swallowing as his dick throbbed. He looked down at Die for a moment then reached down, pulling himself free from his pants, stroking his cock some, smirking. "I'm too hard."

"Excuses," Die breathed out, his hand tightening just a tiny bit, though not enough to actually hurt Kyo at all. He just wanted to fuck with his head, not his voice or throat. He wet his lips a little and then reached for his lover's cock, starting to stroke his dick.

Kyo let out a low chuckle then groaned, the pressure Die was putting on his neck was just enough to make him feel fuzzy around the edges and to make his cock ache. He bucked into Die's hand for a moment then stopped, biting his lip and forcing himself to relax enough. It took him a moment, but he was finally able to push a spurt of piss out, grunting as it spattered onto his own pants. 

Die wanted to groan the moment that Kyo indulged him. The warmth hit his own hand and he whined a little as he rubbed his hands over the fresh wet spots on Kyo's pants, knowing he hadn't created them. That somehow urged him on greatly, his dick coming to full attention now. "Oh god, Kyo," he whispered, amazed by how aroused this made him. Maybe Kyo had given him something more to look at in this respect, though he was sure this would be a once a year indulgence, if that at all.

Kyo loved the way Die reacted to his actions. Even if this was really the wrong time and wrong place to be doing this sort of thing, he wanted to give Die something special. He licked his lips then shifted, pointing his dick more towards Die's crotch before pushing out another spurt then letting it trickle out, not having the holding power that Die seemed to have. "Hnng, Die..."

Die groaned a little, watching Kyo, his hand still in place, one on Kyo's dick and one on his throat. He felt it splatter against him, dripping down his dick and he felt like he could cum just from the idea of this, much less it actually happening to him right then. He watched as piss kept trickling out of Kyo's dick, smirking a little, finding it erotic that Kyo couldn't keep as fine of control as he could. He slid his fingers through the warm drizzle and murmured, "Just let it out... if someone catches us, I'll say I did it all. Give it to me, baby, all over my shirt and my dick. C'mon." He couldn't believe he was asking for it like this, but it was so warm and pleasant to have Kyo doing it for him.

Kyo stared down at Die, swallowing around the pressure the other's hand was creating in his throat, moaning softly as he bucked his hips a bit and forced himself to piss as hard as he could, a steady stream coming out and splashing over Die's dick and the bottom of his shirt. "Fuck, Die, so dirty." 

Die let out a soft groan, his pants growing warm again as Kyo started to piss on him fully. Knowing Kyo was being this dirty for him, and him alone, really got him going. Without being able to help it, he moved his hand from Kyo's cock to his own, jerking off rapidly as piss hit his cock. It didn't even take him a full minute before he was gone, his cum spurting up between them, splattering everywhere, his moans louder than they should have been, his hips jerking, a look of pure ecstasy on his face. "Kyo," he breathed out.

Kyo finished up with a final spurt then watched as Die started to frantically jerk off, a moan sliding past his lips as he saw the ecstasy on his lover's face. He reached down and began stroking himself, only to stop as Die began cumming. He ran his other hand over Die's dick, stroking the last bit out then bringing it up to his lips, smirking as he sucked his fingers into his mouth, cleaning them off. 

Die groaned faintly, feeling honestly rather fulfilled by what had just happened. He reached for Kyo's cock, his free hand slipping down Kyo's chest and then to his balls while he jerked him off with the other hand. "Come on, baby... give it to me."

Kyo let out a soft moan as Die touched him, his hips bucking up a bit. He let the other jerk him off, sliding his hand down to his lower abdomen and scraping over the skin with his nails some, shivering. After a few moments, he started thrusting more into Die's hand, feeling his orgasm approaching. "Die..." 

"That's right baby, come on... just like that. Cum all over my hand, sweetheart." He had no idea why he was showering the other in affectionate words in an attempt to get him off, but he really hoped it wasn't doing the opposite of what he wanted. His eyes flicked up to Kyo's and he licked his lips, letting him know how much he wanted this to happen.

The look in Die's eyes and, though he wouldn't quite admit it, the affectionate words were all it took to push him over the edge he'd been teetering on. With another buck of his hips, he moaned and started cumming, spurting out onto his abdomen and Die's hand.

Die groaned as Kyo splattered him with an entirely different sort of warm liquid. He leaned up to catch Kyo's lips in a kiss as the other came, slipping his tongue into the other's mouth and making a pleased little sound as he did it.

Kyo slipped his clean hand up into Die's hair, returning the kiss then resting his forehead against the other's, panting softly. "Happy Birthday, baby."

Die let out a little laugh and then groaned. "How... in the hell... do I explain this to Nora, by the way?" He pitched his voice a bit differently. "Nora, can you clean mine and Kyo's pants? I pissed them," he hissed out in a whisper, rolling his eyes.

Kyo snorted and shook his head. "I have no idea... I was kind of thinking we could just sneak them into a coin laundry or something." 

"I think we may very well have to," he mumbled, "but for now... we need to clean this seat, and desperately. My ass is getting cold.

Kyo nodded and shifted off of Die, groaning a bit as he had no choice but to tuck himself away from the moment, even in the wet pants. "I think there are some of those Clorox wipes in the cabinet there."

Die chuckled a bit, watching Kyo tuck himself away in wet pants. "Mmm... sexy... just sayin'." He didn't even bother, he pushed his pants off and then went to get a garbage bag, coming back with it and a few baby wipes as well as the Clorox wipes. He put his pants and boxers into the bag and then started wiping down his feet and then the couch and floor, doing a really thorough job of it.

Kyo huffed a bit then peered as Die got a garbage bag. "You could have mentioned that..." He stripped out of his own pants and underwear, tossing them into the bag as well before using the baby wipes on himself. "I find it ironic that we went and took a long, hot shower first and _then_ got really filthy."

Die let out a laugh. "Piss is sterile." He finished up with the couch and floor and then gestured. "Stand over the bag." He grabbed a lukewarm bottle of water and his towel from the showers they'd just had.   
Kyo wrinkled his nose. "I know... but besides that, cum is sticky." He moved to stand over the bag, raising an eyebrow at Die. "Gonna give me a sponge bath, baby?" 

Die shifted over to him and poured some water over the sticky parts, washing with his hand a bit and made sure he was clean before handing him the towel. "Now me." He handed him a wet wipe for his feet as well.

Kyo smiled a bit at the care Die was taking to make sure everything, including himself, was clean. "Thank you, honey." He dried off then wiped down his feet before tossing the wipe in the trash. He moved over to Die and quickly gave him the same treatment before he wrapped him in the towel. "All clean." 

Die used a wipe on his feet as well and then tied up the bag, glancing around. "Where do we put it?" he asked, his cheeks a bit flushed, realizing they were naked in the middle of the bus.

Kyo glanced down at his exposed body then hummed, staring at the bag. "Er... no idea. Just in the bathroom or something? And we really need pants."

"Uh... no... nowhere anyone can see." He bit his lip and then went to put it under the sink cabinet, pushing it into the back. He put a few things in front of it. "We'll find a way to wash them tomorrow, but it has to be then because they'll smell." He made a face as he meandered back toward the bunks, not seeing anyone out and about.

Kyo wrinkled his nose then followed Die. "Yeah, I'm sure there will be a place near the venue." He got to his bunk and reached past the curtain, pulling out his pajama bottoms and tugging them on.

Die looked up at Kyo as he crawled into his bunk, biting his lip and then getting his own from his bag and pulling them on along with a new shirt. He leaned up on his tiptoes and reached to pull Kyo in for a brief kiss. "Love you, baby," he whispered in English.

Kyo blinked then smiled, the words taking a moment to process. "Love you, too." He stood there for a moment then nodded towards Die's bunk. "Bed?"

Die smiled and nodded, slipping into his own bunk and waiting on Kyo, curled up on his side.

Kyo moved into Die's bunk as well, shifting around a bit then curling up next to him, his arm sliding around his waist. After a few moments of lying there, he whispered softly, "I hope I didn't push you too far..." 

Die's eyes glittered as he peered at Kyo. "No... actually... you showed me an aspect I didn't think I'd enjoy, but for sure did."

Kyo hummed and nuzzled against Die's chest. "Good..." 

Die ghosted his fingers over the other's cheek and smiled. "You're a very giving person and I hope you know how much that means to me."

Kyo leaned into the touch, flushing some. "I just want you to be happy." 

"Well, you managed that really fucking well," Die murmured, nuzzling into Kyo's neck. "Though... I am now cold." He laughed as he tugged Kyo closer. "C'mere."

Kyo laughed and curled himself around Die, shivering a bit himself. "You're just using that as an excuse to _cuddle_."

"Ha! Like I need an excuse!" He chuckled and tugged a blanket over them both.

Kaoru groaned in his bunk and thumped it. "Can you both be a little less sickeningly sweet while we're trying to sleep?" he asked, chuckling just after.

Kyo opened his mouth to say something then snorted. "Get some earplugs like Shinya." 

Toshiya giggled somewhere in his bunk, having been half listening to Kyo and Die murmur to each other with some jealousy, wishing that he was cuddled up with Kaoru at the moment. 

"Oh hush!" Kaoru hissed out, laughing just after as well, still in too good a mood from earlier to really be bitchy about it.

Die chuckled, shaking his head. "Okay, okay... you, too, jerkface."

Kyo laughed softly and readjusted. "Y'all are all jerkfaces... so there." 

Toshiya huffed. "Oi! I didn't say anything!"

"But you were listening!" Die tacked on, smirking from ear-to-ear.

"Go to sleep!" Kaoru huffed a bit and rolled over, though he really wasn't mad, just putting on that he was so they'd sleep at least some tonight.

Toshiya let out another huff then laughed before settling down again. 

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "Yeah, yeah, we'll sleep... eventually." He was actually already quite drowsy, the show, their shower and recent activities had taken a lot out of him. 

Die curled up into Kyo's arms and rested his head on the other's chest, something that was usually reversed, but he felt like he wanted to be held tonight, on his very own birthday.

Kyo smiled and wrapped his arms around Die, stroking his hair softly and placing a light kiss to the top of his head. He adored moments like this, really. 

Die closed his eyes and allowed his mind to start to wind down from the night, a little smile on his face as he started to drift off.

**To Be Continued...**


	17. Chapter 17

Kyo held Die all through the night, sleeping peacefully and happily until he woke up several hours later, the bus having already stopped at their venue. The first thing he noticed was that he had to piss and the second was that it felt like his throat was on fire. Frowning, he slowly shifted out from under Die and made his way to the bathroom, taking care of that, then getting a bottle of water. He took a sip and winced at the pain, silently cursing to himself. This was not good.

Die didn't even wake up, passed out completely in his bunk for the first time in a while. He was so exhausted that he was finally sleeping and not just napping.

Kyo sighed and went to his own bunk, digging out his bag and searching in it until his found what he was looking for, a pill case with four white pills in it. He hated the idea of having to take them but the way his throat felt at the moment, he would have to in order to get through the show. He shoved the pills back in his bag for now, he'd take them later.

Die woke up sometime later, stretching and yawning. He pulled himself out of bed and padded toward the bathroom, looking purely groggy.

Kyo was on his second cup of herbal tea that he'd fixed, perched on the edge of the couch in the back and looking lost in his own world, his persistent throat issues concerning him and throwing him into a downward spiral.

Once Die had finished pissing and taking care of his other morning routines, he came back out and went about getting himself dressed for the day. He put on his standard black jeans and a black tank, then grabbed his cardigan, putting it aside to get before going on stage. Fastening his belt buckle, he came to a stop in front of Kyo. He just smiled and leaned down, catching Kyo's lips in a short kiss before he straightened again. "Morning, baby."

Kyo blinked slowly when Die kissed him, barely having time to react to it before the other pulled away. He offered what he hoped was a smile and not a grimace as he murmured back, "Morning."

Die settled himself on the couch next to Kyo and smiled softly, reaching to rub his leg. "Ready for today?" he asked quietly. It would be an eventful one for certain. He could already feel the warm buzz in his body from the fact that it was his birthday and they had a show, one of his favorite things, to keep him occupied.

Kyo swallowed another sip of tea, debating on telling Die how he was feeling then decided not to, he really didn't want to ruin the other's birthday so soon. "Yeah, definitely... though I do kinda wish we were spending it alone together instead."

The guitarist gave the other a smile. "You're amazing for wishing such things." He reached to push his finger on Kyo's nose before standing up again. "Well, since we're here, I guess we should do the laundry and then get some breakfast. I can take care of it." He wandered over to the cabinet and crouched down, opening the doors and starting to root around.

Kyo blushed slightly, leaning over to kiss Die's cheek then wrinkling his nose. "I suppose so."

After a minute, he leaned up, looking purely panicked and hissed out, "Kyo! It's not here!" His eyes were wide and he could feel his heart thudding in his chest near-desperately.

Kyo had just stood up to assist Die with the laundry when the other informed him that their bag wasn't there. "Oh shit....who took it?" He moved to check the garbage can and even some of the other cabinets, just to be sure before he ran a hand through his hair agitatedly. "Damn it!"

Die sat back on his heels, letting Kyo search around with him, looking purely distressed. He pressed one shaking hand to his mouth and then quickly stood up. He made his way to the bathroom and shut the door, though not locking it, and pulled out his phone. He didn't know who to text first, finally settling on Toshiya. Sometimes he'd played pranks with him and some of them had been more than a little thoughtless in the past. He started typing out a message. _Did you take the clothing I was going to wash? It's not a funny joke to find my clothing missing if you did._ He hesitated on it, not sure if he should send it or not.

Kyo rooted around in a few more places and then sort of leaned against the wall, letting out a slightly shaky sigh. He started to ask Die what he was doing but then heard the clicking of his phone. "Who are you texting?"

"Toshiya," Die replied immediately. "Sometimes his ideas of jokes are not funny."

Kyo sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face. "Yeah, I remember."

Die huffed after a moment and finally sent the text off, having no idea what else to do. It didn't give away too much if he hadn't, but enough if he had, to show what he was talking about.

Toshiya was currently nursing a cup of coffee while watching Kaoru bustle around the venue, setting things up and checking them. His phone went off and he pulled it out, raising an eyebrow at Die's message then shot one back. _Uh, no. I haven't seen any laundry. Sorry, man._

Die groaned and slammed one hand into the wall, cursing under his breath. He came out of the bathroom and looked ready to seriously do some injury to someone if he didn't find out what happened to his bag sometime soon. "Wasn't him."

Kyo moved out of Die's way, wincing a little. This was not good... not good at all. "Great... er... Nora?" He hated to even ask her, but what choice did they have?

Die let out a sour growl and yanked his phone back out, knowing texting her was going to get nowhere, he dialed her number and waited. Once she answered, he tried his best to be civil, though his voice was shaking with something that could only be labeled as fear. "Nora? It's Die... uh... can I talk to you in person?" He didn't want to risk a fan overhearing him for any reason.

A few moments later, he hung up the phone and jammed his phone back into his pocket. "She says she'll be here in a few minutes, was just on her way."

Kyo reached out and placed a hand on Die's arm, squeezing lightly. "It's going to be okay..." he was worried too though, because it would be hard to explain piss-soaked clothes.

It took about ten minutes before the bus door opened, revealing Nora, carrying four huge bags. She got up the steps and put things down, then closed the door and locked it behind her. After some more wrestling, she got the bags onto the table and let out a sigh. She turned to Die and tilted her head at him. "Okay, what can I help you with?"

Die stared at her, a nervous look on his face. After a few moments, he looked down at the floor and then mumbled, "Did... did you take out the trash this morning?" It was all he could think of to ask, given that maybe if someone didn't pay attention to the contents, then his and Kyo's clothing had been pitched somewhere... hopefully nowhere near the venue.

Kyo glanced up as Nora entered the bus, eyeing the bags she was carrying with some concern. He bit his lip and kind of poked at them once they were on the table.

Nora reached to swat Kyo's hand away without really fully paying attention. "Stop poking the bread, Kyo," she murmured quietly, refocusing on Die a moment after. "I did." She smiled and then turned around, reaching for the bag furthest from Kyo and handing it over. "Your laundry." And she grabbed a smaller one. "You're laundry." She picked up a third bag. "Toshiya's laundry." And then she pointed at the third bag, "Groceries. I was finishing Kaoru's and Shinya's laundry when you called. I had Kuroo stay with it though." She shrugged a little and then looked concerned. "Did you throw out something you didn't mean to?"

Die paled visibly when he was handed back his laundry and quietly opened the bag, his heart thumping in his chest. He rooted around a bit, a few things had been dirty a couple of days and there on the bottom, were his jeans and boxers and shirt from the night before. The look on his face said it all, the way he went even paler and looked ready to be sick. "I... oh god," he whispered out.

Kyo let out a huff at the slap to his hand then looked up as Nora handed him a bag, pursing his lips some. He opened the bag to discover his own soiled clothing from the night before, his stomach lurching a bit. "Oh."

Nora glanced between the pair of them, noting the look of horror on their faces. She reached and put a hand on Die's shoulder, steadying him as he wavered on the spot. She squeezed a bit. "Calm down, both of you, please." She glanced back through the bus, checking if anyone else was on board and lowered her voice just in case. "I don't need any explanations, but you didn't need to throw them out. You both know I'll clean up after anything: accidents, vomit, I don't care. It's not a big deal, but I'm not letting almost 60,000 yen worth of clothing get thrown away because someone's ashamed of something." She patted Die's shoulder and squeezed Kyo's as she picked up the grocery bag and went to the fridge, kneeling down to restock it.

Die looked like he wanted to sink into the floor and vanish from earth. The idea that Nora, of all people, had seen their piss-soaked clothing made him feel incredibly upset. He didn't want his secret out and least of all did he want someone he damn near considered to be his mother knowing about it. But it seemed she already knew. "Nora, I... we... oh god," he whispered out, his voice cracking.

Nora looked sharply at him and held up her hand. "No. I said I don't want explanations, just don't go trying to throw things away again. Is that clear?"

Kyo took a while to recover from the shock of Nora having taken care of their clothes without so much as batting an eye. When she squeezed his shoulder, he turned and looked at her with gratitude. "Thanks, Nora..."

Nora gave Kyo a small smile. "For... future reference, please don't put it in a tied up bag. Makes it worse. Leave it on the floor in the bathroom or something." She gave them a little smirk and went back to restocking the fridge. "You know... if you're coherent enough by then after all the booze."

Die almost wanted to breathe out a sigh of relief. So she chalked it up to pissing himself because he was boozed up and maybe passed out. And... maybe she thought Kyo had gotten wet because he'd been in the bunk with him at the time? He blinked a little, feeling some of his worry ebb away. That, he could deal with and wave away easily. "Thank you," he murmured, traipsing off to his bunk to go put his clothing away.

Kyo gave Nora a little bow then followed Die, placing his clothing in his bunk then crawling out and peering at his lover. "Well, then...."

Die stared at Kyo, his eyes still slightly scared and he shook his head, trying to imply they'd talk in a minute, but not now. He sat down on his bunk and put his head in his hands, trembling slightly.

Nora made fast work of getting everything put into the fridge and then dumping Toshiya's laundry on his bunk. She skirted past Die and headed off the bus without another word.

Kyo offered Nora another small wave then sat next to Die, reaching out to lightly pat his arm.

Die let out a thin little whine and then choked out, "Of all the fucking people... she's like my mother to me, Kyo!"

Kyo frowned and let out a sigh, chewing his bottom lip. "I think maybe... that's better in a way?

Die kept his head bowed, arms resting on his knees, hands hanging down. He let out a soft sigh and then sat up, knowing he couldn't mope forever over something he couldn't change. "I... I think she knows, Kyo. The way she cut me off when I was going to make something up... I think she knows."

Kyo leaned back some and closed his eyes, swallowing a bit. "Maybe she does... it wouldn't surprise me for her to have picked up on some things."

The guitarist shifted uncomfortably and then ran a shaking hand over his face. He just had to deal with this. He knew she wouldn't judge him because she honestly loved them all like her own children, despite being near the same age. For a while they'd joked she was 'Mama Nora', but dropped it when they'd realized she might take offense due to the age implication. And, really, was it so bad for someone he knew would never betray his trust to know? But that didn't keep the shaken-up feeling from him whatsoever. He reached for Kyo's hand and squeezed it tight. "I think... I shall not be doing that on the bus from now on. I feel bad for her, if nothing else, for having to handle that."

Kyo hummed softly, nodding. "I have to agree..." He knew this had to be difficult for Die, especially given how self-conscious he was about his fetishes not to mention the close relationship with Nora. Kyo, on the other hand, had long ago figured out that 'Mama Nora' could handle almost anything you tossed at her.

Die turned his face to Kyo's and then looked shocked all over again. "Oh no... no no no..." he stood up so quickly he wacked his head on the top of the bunk and started cursing. After a moment, he just had a sour look on his face and was rubbing at the lump on his head. "She... she'll think... but... what about you? I... I have to take the blame. She can't think it was both of us. I just... I did it and you got it on accident. Or... something, I don't know, I'll figure it out." He looked even more distressed now that it was Kyo on the line and not him.

Kyo stared at Die for a moment then reached out, grabbing him by the wrist. "Daisuke! Calm down... I mean, you don't know that she knows."

Die didn't know what to do. He half wanted to fling Kyo's hand off and make a run for it, go prove Kyo innocence to Nora. But the other part was horrified at the prospect of having to try to make something up about why he'd pissed on Kyo. He swallowed thickly and ducked his head. "But I can't let her think you did it. That's not fair, Kyo. It's my problem, not yours."

Kyo sighed softly, reaching out to pat Die's shoulder then just leaning back against the wall of the bunk. "I think you're worrying too much."

Die shivered a little and huffed out a breath, looking unhappy. "Maybe so..." he shifted a bit uncomfortably, "but... I don't even know." He sighed and then curled up within the bunk, closing his eyes. "Just come lay with me so I can forget it, yeah?"

Kyo nodded and moved into the bunk with Die, curling up beside him, placing his hand against the other's chest. "It'll be okay..."

Die supposed it would be, one way or another. He just needed to relax and stop worrying so much about what Nora did and did not know. All that should matter was the man right here next to him and that the fans hadn't found out his dirty secret. Almost an hour went by before he finally fully relaxed in Kyo's arms, lightly snoring, though he was only napping.

Kyo only lightly dozed himself, his mind going over the fact that his throat was probably in the worst condition it had been on the entire tour. He once again considered mentioning it to Die, but decided against it, not wanting to worry the other after the morning they'd had. He'd just take meds, drink more tea, and spend extra time with his humidifier.

Kyo woke up sooner than Die, leaving the guitarist to snooze, going about getting dressed and drinking more tea, then eating the food Nora brought him. He'd made his way into the venue without much hassle and had gone straight backstage to use his humidifier, having skipped sound check in order to rest.

Die snorted himself awake about an hour before the meet and greet was scheduled to start. He winced, sitting up in a now-barren bus. "Shit!" He quickly rushed around, getting ready for their day and then hopping off the bus and heading for the sound check area, looking more than a little flustered as he passed the fans.

The vocalist had just glanced at the time when he saw Die rush past and winced a little, guessing the other had not awoke until now. He should have at least made sure an alarm was set or something, but he'd honestly not thought that Die would sleep so long.

Die quickly went through the motions of sound check, trying not to panic too much. Once he was done with that, he huffed out a sigh and padded backstage, flopping down on a couch and snatching up the waiting bottle of wine, popping it open, and pouring himself a quarter glass. He had been trying to cut down a bit and wine seemed to do it for him quicker than beer ever had. He swirled the glass and then sniffed it and took a sip.

Kyo heard Die's sound check end and he finally flicked his machine off, standing and wandering into the next room to see his lover sipping wine. He gave him an apologetic look and curled up next to him, murmuring softly, "Slept that long, huh?"

Die glanced up at Kyo and nodded a little, taking in deep calming breaths as he sat there with his wine. He licked his lips a little. "Yeah... no idea why. Maybe emotional exhaustion."

Kyo frowned slightly and reached out, running his hand over Die's leg. He was dealing with his own demons at the moment, so he wasn't much for offering moral support, but he still wanted to comfort him in some manner. "Perhaps..."

Die made a little sound and then went about drinking more of his wine. "Know if there's any dinner left?'

"I'm not sure, Nora brought me something earlier though. There should be though... there was a catering table that seemed well-stocked when I passed it earlier." He sniffed then leaned back, clearing his throat a few times.

Die gave a little nod and swallowed the rest of his wine. He stood up and pushed a hand through his hair. "I need to get some food, I'll be back in a few minutes."

Kyo nodded and continued to sit there, leaning back with his eyes closed. He honestly had no desire to go to the meet and greet this evening, but he knew he couldn't disappoint the fans that way so he would go. Perhaps he'd just huddle into his coat or something.

Die went to find the food table. When he found it, he quickly got one of the BBQ sandwiches that seemed so tasty and a few potato chips. He added a pickle slice and then grabbed a sandwich for Kyo as well just in case he was remotely hungry, coming back with the items. He handed one to Kyo and plopped down on the couch.

Kyo contemplated the sandwich then picked it up and took a bite. It was definitely tasty. "Thanks." He took another bite then reached over and took a couple of Die's chips, eating them as well.

Die smiled a little, going about eating his own sandwich. He could tell something was wrong with Kyo, but he wasn't entirely sure what and he didn't feel much like pressing given what had happened earlier in the day. He picked up a chip and offhandedly offered it to the other man.

Kyo polished off his sandwich then took the chip Die offered, letting his fingers brush over the other's before pulling away and eating the chip. After a few minutes, he stood and walked over to the table full of drinks, cups, a coffee maker, and pitcher of tea. He poured himself some tea then went back to the couch, settling down against Die once more and letting out a sigh. "Almost time for the thing with the fans."

"Yeah... it is," Die murmured. He wanted to be happy, wanted to be in sincere tip-top shape for his Birthday's meet and greet. He sighed softly and leaned back, debating his problem. After a moment, he quietly offered, "I think we should talk tonight... about last night and Nora... and some other stuff." He reached to squeeze Kyo's thigh. "Nothing bad though, I promise."

Kyo glanced over at Die then nodded, licking his lips. "Okay, we'll talk then." He had an odd feeling in his gut about that, past experiences with the phrase _we need to talk_ dancing around in his head. He finished off his tea then stood. "Going to hit the toilet before the meet and greet." He offered Die a small smile then took off towards the bathroom.

Die almost reached out to get Kyo for a moment, just to give him a kiss. But the other didn't seem in that sort of mood right then. He made a little face and decided he'd been wrong to tell him he wanted to talk when they didn't have time to do it right then. He got up to follow Kyo, but was intercepted by Kaoru, trying to round everyone up to get to the meet and greet.

Kyo quickly took care of business then washed his hands, looking at his reflection in the mirror. He could see the stress there, the worn look one got after a long tour. He hated it and scoffed at it as he turned his back and left, heading back towards the area he and Die had been sitting in. He didn't get there though, seeing that the others, Die included had gathered near the stage. With a sigh, he darted into the sitting area and grabbed his coat, tugging it on, then joining everyone, standing next to Die.

Die glanced over at Kyo and offered him a smile, lightly brushing his hand over Kyo's arm before putting an acceptable distance between them, knowing he shouldn't be squished against the other when the fans came in.

It was silly, but something about that little touch of Die's made him smile a little, drawing him out of his funk just the smallest amount. He shifted off to the side as they took their places, smoothing his coat out and then putting on a what he hoped was a neutral face as Nora lead the fans in.

Die mostly stared at the floor for the duration of the questions area. At one point the fans insisted on singing happy birthday to him and he thought to how they'd done that for Kyo once, long ago, in this very same city. He couldn't help the blushing smile that lit his face or the way he almost tripped over his words trying to say thank you. 

Kyo stayed huddled in his jacket for most of the questions, only answering a couple. When some fans insisted on singing Happy Birthday to Die, he smiled to himself, thinking it really sweet that they wanted to and remember the time fans from the same city had sang to him.

They answered their questions and then Nora led them over to another area for photos and handshakes. Most of the fans said thank you and took a picture and moved on. But two handed him a cake and he clung to it, a huge grin on his face. A few talked to Kyo longer than just a few simple words and one made a relative scene over Kaoru, making Die smile.

When they moved on to pictures and handshakes, Kyo was relieved to see it moving quickly for the most part. A few of the fans spoke to him, telling him how inspiring he was in their lives and such, making him blush a little. He understood some of their words and got the idea for the most part, but he'd had to call Nora over for one fan. After they were finished, he glanced over at the others and saw Die receiving a cake from a couple of familiar faces and he had to grin, knowing that had probably made the guitarist's night.

Once the fans were gathered around the stage, they departed from the area, Nora grabbing their bags and leading them off. Die looked around once Nora sat the presents down and looked dismayed. "Where's my cake?"

Nora looked shocked for a moment and then rushed off. She came back a few minutes later and showed him the box. "See, all fine."

Die smiled and nodded. "Good. Will you put it in the fridge on the bus?"

Nora nodded and wandered off with it.

Kyo followed and once they were safely backstage again, he pulled Die into a hug, smiling up at him. "Sweet of them..."

Die leaned into Kyo's hug, smiling softly. "Yeah." He pushed one hand through Kyo's hair, cupping his cheek and leaning in, kissing him sweetly for a moment.

Kyo nodded in agreement then smiled against Die's lips, returning the kiss, running his hands up and down Die's back. 

Die grinned once he pulled back and ruffled Kyo's hair a little. "I love you, baby."

Kyo huffed at his hair being mussed then smiled, reached up to stroke Die's cheek. "I love you, too."

Kaoru came by, smirking and waving a hand at them. "What is it that the American's call this? Oh, yes... PDA." He laughed and headed off.

Die let out a snort and slid his arm around Kyo's shoulders. "You ain't seen nothin' yet, baby."

Kyo flipped Kaoru the bird then leaned into Die's touch, grinning. "He doesn't know the half of it." 

Toshiya heard Kaoru and chuckled, catching him in the hall and smacking one on him. "PDA~!" He grinned and wandered off, heading for the food table. 

Kaoru stood there, looking a bit shell-shocked, a tingle going through his body from the kiss. Toshiya was certainly throwing him for a loop, that was for sure.

Die chuckled and finally patted Kyo's cheek again. "Gonna go take a piss before we go on." He turned and trudged off toward the restrooms.

Kyo laughed at Kaoru's reaction then nodded, going to take his throat medicine and make sure his hair was in place. He was feeling somewhat better at the moment, the pain nearly gone, so maybe he wouldn't have too many issues with the show. He did a few last minute stretches and such, and then finally headed out to where they would enter the stage from. 

Die arrived behind Kyo a few minutes later, smelling faintly of wine and his e-cigarette. He patted Kyo's shoulder and slipped down past him, getting to his position in the lineup, taking a deep breath and waiting.

Kyo turned as Die patted his shoulder, frowning slightly at the smell of wine coming off him, but dismissed it a moment later as Kaoru signaled that it was nearly time. He readjusted his in-ears, making sure they were secure and then focused on centering himself, putting all aside except the energy coming from the crowd. 

Die came out on stage to a burst of cheers and applause. He waved and then took his guitar, ready to get into this show and have a damn good live.

Kyo waited for his cue, then move onto the stage, ripping into Ruten no Tou with as much passion as he could throw out, determined to make it good, since it was Die's request. 

Die's eyes flicked over to Kyo for a moment, a grin dancing on his lips. He moved to the front of the stage and did his best to amp up the crowd, playing his own part in what he considered to be a flawless manner. 

Kyo felt electrically charged as the music washed over him, his ear picking up Die's part almost too easily. He sang out the lyrics in perfect pitch, not so much as a tingle hitting his throat throughout the entire song and soon he was wrapped up in the energy and vibes that came with the screaming crowd below him and the band pouring themselves out around him. Little did he know that it would all come crashing down before the night was over. 

Die ripped into the next song with a scream at the crowd, letting a note ring out and shaking his fist at them to be louder. They responded by screaming back at him, a few middle fingers being raised in his direction, making him grin. Tonight was going to be amazing; he could feel it deep inside his bones.

Kyo held back a grin as Die taunted the crowd, his own hands out, beckoning them to scream for him. He threw himself into the song, growling and screaming the lyrics rather than singing them. He hunched over, foot tapping on his crate as he ramped up, finally finishing the song with a ripping growl that left his throat sore. He bounced off his crate and moved to grab a bottle of water, downing half of it then going back for the next song.

Die took the opportunity to come to the very front of the stage, out in front of his equipment, crouching down and giving some very hardcore looks to a few of the familiar faces in the crowd. He lived on things like this, seeing those usual faces looking up at him, screaming for him and throwing themselves into their songs. It made all the difference in the world to his mood during a live, seeing the adoration and love there... or not. A few reached for his boot, putting their hands on it and he let a big grin slip over his face, lowering his guitar almost to the stage and violently putting out the last few chords of the song. Pulling back, he bounced away to trade off guitars while the others took a tiny break, doing what they needed as well.

Kyo caught Die's every move and would have laughed if he wasn't too busy scowling as was expected. He got more water, ignoring the twinges that were making themselves known in his throat. He made his way back to his box, stepping up on it and looking out at the crowd, sneering. They screamed and pumped their hands into the air, reaching for him, for the band, as if touching them would make their lives complete. Perhaps to some of them it would. He let a small smirk touch his lips then started into the next song.

Die bounded back to his mic, making sure he got a few of his signature moves in, making the people in front of him scream, even the men pumping their fists and letting out manly growls at him. He made his way in front of his equipment again, striking a pose and waiting on the hands to come creeping up his legs. But they stayed on his boot instead and he stared down at them, yelling to try to get them to move up higher, but they all stared at him in an almost reverent fashion. The truth was, he adored the touches, the fondling, and even being with Kyo wasn't about to stop him from giving the fans this piece of himself. He let out a laugh and twisted his leg, allowing their hands to slide up higher, some on his calf, others on his lower thigh and knee. He tilted his head back and let out another shout, starting to sing along with Kyo for a couple of bars, bouncing a little on the spot.

They were nearly through the song, everything still fine, then one long, high pitched note that he held out seemed to rip his throat to shreds. Kyo finished the song with a growl then doubled over in pain though he figured it looked more like his usual theatrics. The next song started and he carried on, screeching through most of the lyrics, pain welling up in him like fire, burning him alive.

By the time his Inward Scream started, he felt like crying and eventually turned on himself, clawing at his chest at first and then all out punching himself in the cheek, his teeth cutting into the inside of his mouth as he did it a few times until blood was dripping from his mouth and onto his stomach. It did little to sooth him as he chanted, his voice hoarse and raw.

After a few moments, he dropped to his knees, bending over far enough into the crowd that he felt people petting at him. 

He reached out and grabbed someone's hand, squeezing it tightly, then releasing it, sinking back into himself, crying out with inhumane sounds, full of pain.

Die thrived on the attention given to him by his adoring fans. There were hands everywhere, on his guitar, on his legs, gently resting on the hand he was using to strum with. He thought to himself that nothing could top this feeling: his own birthday, everyone so happy to see him, his side fuller than usual, a few people coming over for only that reason.

But then he heard it, Kyo's voice faltering and he spun away from the fans, playing toward his amp for a moment, a wince coming over his face. He wasn't at all pleased with where he could imagine this going. But it only meant he was going to try to be more for the fans, to keep the attention off Kyo's voice and on him. It was his usual reaction. Any problems with anyone, Die covered for it by drawing the attention away and onto himself.

A few minutes later, he could hear Kyo smacking himself, the sobs coming from a few fans and he winced again, covering it with a sneer at the crowd, flipping them off. They responded the same way and he licked his lips, trying hard not to look at Kyo, knowing there'd be blood, knowing his heart would be on fire with agony if he did it. With the intentions of finishing the concert in his mind, he focused on the crowd, on the familiar faces now filled with pain, and threw himself to their mercy, trying to attract their attention and gain their focus on him and him alone. It was for the best, some people thinking Kyo's actions only theatrics, others taking it to heart just as he did. And he felt for them in a way no one could have ever guessed.

Kyo stayed hunched over on his crate, hand going to tug wildly at his hair, body trembling with pain as more blood dripped down his chest. He swallowed and let out another pained cry then stilled, waiting on the next song and throwing himself into it, body jerking like it was being pulled by marionette strings.

Die did his best to continue to keep up all appearances with the crowd, encouraging their usual antics, trying to get them to head-bang, throw him the bird, and scream when he did. For the most part, it was working and for that much, he was glad.

Kyo was determined to not let the fans know that anything was really wrong, though he had a feeling some of them knew. He could see the pain on their faces and felt sorry for inflicting it. After the song, he moved over to open another bottle of water, surprised and thankful to see a thermos there instead, his name on it. Nora must've sent it out at some point. He took a quick drink of the warm liquid inside, finding it to be some type of Theraflu stuff.

He ignored the look Kaoru was giving him and didn't dare look towards Die as he moved to pick up his microphone again, praying to all the Gods to just let him finish the show without further complications.

They started the next song and though his voice was still ragged, it was slightly less painful and he managed to push through it.

Die continued to play, his head bowed to form a curtain with his hair, focusing on the crowd, on the fact that he'd pulled a few of them on his side back into his world, where he gave every pretense of being perfectly okay. One set of eyes followed his every move, absorbed in it, another person head-banged so hard he could have sworn they'd hit their head on the stage if they weren't careful. He stalked off toward the other side of his area, pumping his fist into the air and screaming out some of the lyrics, keeping everyone engaged, a few of the men roaring back at him, causing him to smirk.

Kyo was only granted a small reprieve from his pain, by the time they were on the last song, he could hardly see straight from it. It felt like he'd swallowed razor blades coated in salt. For the most part, he could tell the crowd was none the wiser, but a few concerned faces peering up at him, streaked with tears, told him that if he couldn't fool them, then there was no way he was passing it off to Die or the rest of the band as something minor.

As the final notes reverberated, he dropped his mic, grabbed a water bottle and spat on the crowd, going through the motions and then turning and making a beeline for the small private area afforded to him and slammed the door. He yanked out his in-ears then all but collapsed onto the floor, holding his head in his hands. This was bad. It was like nothing he'd ever felt before and it honestly scared the shit out of him.

Die all but flung his guitar at Kuroo when the break came before the encore. He was terrified inside as to what he was going to find inside that room. He slipped up the stairs in a bit of a rush, almost missing the last one, stumbling into the door, Nora catching him at the last second and giving him a concerned look. He just shook his head and pushed into the room, muttering, "Can you uh... keep the others out for a minute?" He reached and thrust a few towels and waters at her and then closed the door, leaning on it. He stared down at Kyo on the floor, his entire body shaking with his fear as he took a few steps forward and then knelt next to him. He lifted his chin and pushed his hands away, pressing a finger to his lips. "No talking..." he whispered.

He grabbed one of the towels and a bottle of water, wetting it and carefully started to mop up the blood from Kyo's face and then from his chest, doing it in a loving sort of manner, knowing he had to hold himself together for his lover's sake, for the crowd that was waiting on their encore, screaming for it even now.

Kyo started when the door opened, but he heard Die's voice and didn't move until his chin was being lifted up. At Die's instructions, he kept his mouth shut, jaw clenched tightly. It seemed that his lover knew just what the problem was and he felt a rush of gratitude for it... for not having to explain himself.

As Die started to clean him up, he reached out with a shaky hand to rest it on his shoulder, squeezing tightly. He could hear the crowd calling for their encore and he knew he would have to go out there again, endure more pain for them.

Die knelt there for what felt like eternity. Finally, he leaned in and tilted Kyo's head back. He placed the most gentle of kisses on those gorgeous lips, the slight tang of blood meeting his tongue. He pulled back after a moment and stood. "I'd stick around, but if I do, I'll end up with an embarrassing situation. Let the others in, please?" He hurried out the other door and down the corridor to the restroom, quickly relieving himself. His bladder had become a pain in his ass in the past five years and he hated it sometimes. As much as he could enjoy it at other times, today was not the day whatsoever. He came rushing back as quickly as he could, doing up his belt, stepping into the room where the others looked ready to leave once again.

When the others came in, Kyo ignored their looks of concern, picking up and redoing his monitor, attempting to psych himself up for the encore. He gave an experimental cough and winced, though the pain had ebbed slightly.

Nora showed up with more liquid medicine which he drank quickly, finishing it just as Die came back. He gave him a slightly helpless look then sighed as Kaoru signaled it was time they headed back out on stage.

Die squeezed Kyo's shoulder as he passed, moving to take his place as they descended the stairs. He let out a little sigh and moved toward the stage. As he entered, he pumped his fist in the air, mouthing out, "Fuck yes!" to the crowd, trying to get them amped up.

Kyo stalked out on stage, his movements slow and deliberate. He picked up his mic and spread his arms, sneering out over the audience. He sent up a quick prayer and then dove into the song, pushing away the pain, determined to get through this. His voice sounded awful even to his own ears, raw and hoarse for the most part, flat in others as he tried to reach notes that he couldn't. He didn't care though, just continued to push through the encore despite the fact that his body was shaking by the end of it.

Die pulled out all the stops, taking his brand new guitar in hand for the first time this tour. He even shared it with a few of the familiar faces, focusing on the feeling of being adored and trying to get the noise level in the venue to unspeakable volumes. When he finally couldn't hear anything over the roar of the crowd, he was satisfied, thrusting his guitar at Kuroo when the last song was over, immediately starting to give out pics and toss out water over the crowd, dumping a good amount on the first few rows as he knelt there. They still cheered and screamed and he felt at least for a moment the last bit of happiness he'd be getting tonight, he was sure.

Kyo gave one last growl and dropped his mic. He managed to toss water on a few folks in the front row and wave to the crowd before finally darting off stage. He stopped long enough to let Nora remove his monitors and hand him an ice pack before pointing at the door and heading out of it, going straight to the bus.

He was about to crawl into his own bunk when he changed his mind and moved into Die's instead, curling up with his knees to his chest as the pain washed over him, getting worse, making him sick to his stomach. This was not the usual pain of having pushed himself too far, this was something else - something serious - and he was terrified of what it could mean.

Die made his way through everything, getting off stage behind the others. He only had to look at Nora for her to point to where their vocalist had gone. He didn't even stop for water, just grabbed his wine bottle and downed some of it before putting it on the other side of the room and pushing out the back doors.

"Die!" Nora called after him, stopping him in his tracks. He looked back. "Your cake, don't forget it. I think you two might need it."

Die nodded and then headed out, quickly rushing to the bus. He came in and grabbed the cake, cutting off two small slices and putting it back in the fridge. He looked in Kyo's bunk first and then in his own, kneeling down and pushing the curtain out of the way. He sat there, reaching to brush hair back from the other's face. "Baby..." he looked absolutely forlorn, like someone had just run over a kitten right in front of him.

Kyo didn't hear the bus door open nor did he hear Die rustling around in the fridge, so when the other spoke, he jumped then looked up Die, eyes full of pain, both physical and mental. He leaned into the other's hand then drew in a shaky breath. "Die..." His voice sounded more like a croak and he winced.

It was a few moments before he realized the other had cake and a wave of guilt washed over him, reminding him that he'd probably just ruined Die's birthday. With a sigh, he gestured to it then shifted over in the bunk, giving the other room to crawl in if he wanted. "I'm sorry."

Die shook his head a little. "Don't, baby... don't talk and don't apologize." He ran his fingers over the other's cheek and then pushed one of the plates toward him. "Eat your piece... it's cold, so it'll help with the icky feeling in your throat. I hope." He took a bite of his own, chewing a kiwi off the top and thinking how grateful he was for a little bit of a pick-me-up right then.

Kyo felt his lip tremble slightly, a lump in his throat that had nothing to do with the pain just then. He swallowed it and nodded, taking his piece of cake, biting into a piece of strawberry. He chewed it and swallowed, finding the cold really did feel good and continued on with the rest of the piece, leaning onto Die despite being sweaty from the stage.

Die ate his slice quickly and then put the plate out to the side. He waited on Kyo to finish as well and then did the same, crawling all the way in with the other and settling down and putting his arm around him. He turned on the light above them and patted Kyo's cheek. "Open up, baby, let me see."

Kyo had pretty much forgotten about his cheek, but cringed a little when Die patted it. He swallowed to make sure there was no cake left in his mouth then opened up, titling his head back and closing his eyes as he did.

Die carefully moved Kyo's head to peer in and look at the damage. He could see the gashes on his cheek, relieved they weren't too bad and would heal on their own. He turned his head a little and then peered in, wincing at how raw and aggravated Kyo's throat looked. He gently patted him and murmured, "No talking between now and the next show. Period. Text or write it out. I mean it."

Kyo let out a sigh and opened his mouth to protest before snapping it shut and looking around, finally spotting Die's notebook and grabbing it, using the attached pen to scribble out on the back page. _I feel like the damned Little Mermaid._.

Die peered at what Kyo wrote, having to crack a bit of a smile at that. "Mmm... but you don't look like one." He leaned in, kissing his lips gently and then slid his hand down Kyo's hip, his gaze traveling his body. He wanted to take Kyo's mind off his problems, but he wouldn't act if there wasn't anything to act on.

Kyo huffed slightly and then inhaled sharply as Die's touch sent heat straight to his groin. Despite all of the pain, he had still been hard throughout most of the show, proving that he truly was a masochist in that way. He turned and peered at Die, eyes questioning slightly, confused about his intentions. He didn't want to assume that was where it was going.

Die wet his lips slightly, watching Kyo's reaction to his touches. Once he was sure the other was at least not in too much pain to respond to him, he gently kissed his lips again, his hand sliding down over his groin, gently rubbing. "Do you want some relief, baby?"

Kyo bit his lip and nodded, his body already responding. He pulled Die forward by his shirt and kissed him hard, arching into his touch. It seemed an odd thing to be doing, but it would take his mind off his current problem and keep him from sinking too far into himself.

Die let out a soft sound into the kiss, moving to unfasten Kyo's belt and pants, doing so with ease. He slid his hand into the other's trousers, pulling his cock free and starting to stroke him, intending to give him the relief he needed and then just lay there with him until the vocalist fell asleep in his arms.

Kyo bit his lip to keep from groaning, his hand going to thread into Die's hair as the guitarist touched him. He mouthed out, "Please," hoping Die would know what he was begging for.

Die kissed him once more before he shifted out of the bunk, getting back in the other way around. He pulled Kyo toward him and leaned in, gently licking up his length and then sliding his mouth over his lover's cock. He wasn't certain if this was what Kyo had wanted, but it was what he felt he could do best right then.

Kyo watched Die switch positions with some confusion, but then let out a hoarse moan as Die's lips wrapped around him, his hand coming out to grip the other's hip hard as gazed down at his lover, mouthing his name even though he knew he couldn't see it at the moment. He wanted so badly to be returning the favor, but knew that was the last thing he needed to do with his throat jacked up.

Die let out a little moan around the vocalist's cock. He absorbed himself in the task at hand, trying to forget that his lover was in pain while he worked to give him at least some pleasure on top of the suffering he had to still be feeling. He was diligent, his head bobbing quickly, tongue swirling and his cheeks hollowing out when he sucked.

Kyo writhed beneath Die, his body saying what he couldn't, hips bucking up slightly into the other's mouth. He let his hand move up to slide over Die's side, just needing to touch him.

Die's free hand moved to touch Kyo's hand, keeping it where it was on his hip. Yes, he was hard from pleasuring his love, but he wasn't going to let him do anything about it right then; this was all about Kyo for now.

Kyo shifted some, lacing his fingers with Die's and squeezing as he rolled his hips. He was quickly losing control, soft pants issuing from him.

Die gave it his all, doing things in just the right way he knew his lover would get off fastest from. He let out a low groan, trying to encourage Kyo to cum for him, just wanting to give him his relief.

Kyo clung to Die's hand, letting out the barest of moans as he got nearer his peak. It wasn't much longer before he opened his mouth in a silent scream, hips jerking up as he started to cum into Die's mouth, a whisper of the other's name on his lips.

Die sucked harshly at Kyo as he started to cum, taking everything his lover had to offer, swallowing it down without a second thought. He licked the head and then pulled away, quickly shifting his position to come and lie next to Kyo in the proper way. He carefully put his boxers back in place, not bothering with his pants, brushing his fingers over Kyo's cheek and nose. "Rest, baby..."

Kyo shuddered as Die finished then shifted so the other had room to lay the right way, a grateful look on his face as he reached out to cup Die's cheek for a moment, leaning in to kiss him lightly. He let out a sigh and shifted, laying his head against Die's chest, closing his eyes as exhaustion took its toll and he almost immediately started falling asleep, his fingers idly spelling out _I love you_ on Die's skin.

Die lay there, feeling Kyo writing on him, a soft smile on his face as he made out the characters the other was drawing. He gently kissed his forehead, laying there close to him and waiting on him to fully fall asleep, knowing this would be one that nothing would or could interrupt once he was fully down for the night.

Kyo let out a final sigh then stilled, his breath evening out as he finally did drift off completely, clinging to Die even then.

Die remained for a while after Kyo was asleep, finally peeling himself up and going to do a quick wash-job in the bathroom. He came out, looking exhausted and emotionally drained, dragging his feet, shoulders hunched.

Toshiya was rummaging in the fridge, looking for something that wasn't cake when Die came out. He looked up and frowned, seeing the exhaustion on Die's face that had nothing to do with being actually tired. "That bad, huh?"

Die turned sad eyes on the bassist and gave a little nod, looking almost ready to burst into tears. He pursed his lips, unable to even remotely talk. Somehow, this was worse than all the other times he'd tended to Kyo. Being in a relationship with him made him care that much more and it hurt so deeply that he knew if he opened his mouth, his last barriers would crumble and he'd end up an emotional wreck.

The bassist's frown deepened when all Die could do was nod. He'd been there once or twice before when their vocalist had had to be tended to and Die needed help carrying him or fetching supplies. He could tell that it was quite a strain on him even then, so it must be that much worse now that Die and Kyo were in a relationship. Standing, he moved over to Die and clasped his hand on his shoulder, squeezing tightly. "It's going to be okay, man..."

Die stared at him for a good half a minute before doing something he was sure he'd regret later. He tugged Toshiya into his arms and buried his head against the bassist's shoulder, tears leaking down his cheeks, unable to stop them from overflowing. He whimpered out a little sob, clutching onto the other for dear life, sure that he'd never ever live this down, not in a million years. But he needed it... needed it in a way that he was uncertain he'd ever before.

Toshiya blinked in utter surprise as Die practically clung to him. He was about to make some sarcastic remark when he felt moisture leaking through his shirt and his face softened, a hand moving up to pat Die's hair lightly. There'd be plenty of time to rib the other for this later, but right now, he could feel the trembles coming off him and knew he had to be breaking inside.

For the most part, Die held it back, only a fraction of what he was actually feeling seeping through. He gave it a few moments and then pulled back, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hands and then wincing. "Sorry," he breathed out, "I don't... I can't..." he gave up, shaking his head in dismay. "Too much."

Toshiya held Die until he pulled back then peered at him with concerned eyes. He just shook his head and turned, grabbing up the box of tissues from the table and offering them to Die. "It's alright... I understand." He frowned and scratched his head. "I don't like seeing him in pain either... or any of you for that matter."

Die knew how awkward he'd just made all of this and he took the tissue box without comment, wiping his eyes and then blowing his nose, tossing the used tissue in the trash before putting the box down and stuffing a few more into his pocket for good measure. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. In a low voice, he offered, "It's... it's not like usual, Toshiya. There's something wrong. I can feel it from him. Something's very, very wrong."

Toshiya grabbed a water bottle and took a sip, setting it back down before sighing softly, shaking his head. "Do you think we should get him a doctor? Would he even go to one?" He knew Kyo could be rather stubborn about that stuff. He sat there for a moment then winced slightly, nodding in the general direction of the venue. "You're going to have to tell Kao..."

Die flicked his eyes down to the table and nodded. "I'll do it... and I'll take care of the rest of it, too. I always have and I always will." He reached to squeeze Toshiya's bicep and moved past him. "I... um... I'm sorry I lost it like that, I really am."

Toshiya nodded then offered Die a small smile, reaching up to pat his shoulder. "It's alright..." He moved to get comfortable on the couch, yawning. He really hoped it was just a sore throat or something and not, like Die said, something serious.

Die made his way off the bus, braving himself through the crowd and back into the venue. For the most part, people left him alone, a few waving and he waved back, though he still looked grim.

One inside, he made his way to the backstage area, knowing he'd find Kaoru there. When he did find him, he pushed his hands into his pockets and murmured, "Kaoru?"

Kaoru set down the papers he'd been looking over to glance up at Die, raising one questioning eyebrow. "Yes?" He had a feeling this conversation wasn't going to be a good one because Die looked like his puppy had just been hit by a bus.

Die swallowed thickly and looked at the floor for a long moment. Finally, he looked up and then sighed. "It's Kyo... I... surely you noticed something was wrong tonight?"

Kaoru sniffed, took his glasses off, folding them, then tucking them into his shirt pocket. He fixed Die with a serious look and nodded. "I noticed... what happened and is he alright?"

Die took in another breath, trying to keep his emotions at bay until this was all finished. He shook his head. "No, Kaoru... he's not okay. This... this wasn't the same as usual. It wasn't just strain. His throat is all raw and inflamed, he's in so much pain... it's like..." his voice broke and he cleared his throat, trying to cover it, "it's like he's been hiding it from us, it's so bad right now."

Kaoru's mouth set in a grim line as Die told him what was going on. He reached up to rub a hand over his chin, then sighed in frustration with Kyo, aggravated at the vocalist's tendency to hide things like this. "He'll have to see a doctor pronto....but Die....we can't just cancel our next show, not this late in the game." He knew it sounded harsh, but it would be an absolute nightmare for all involved.

He bowed his head and nodded. "I know, Kaoru... and Kyo knows it, too. I think that's why he's been keeping it from us." He sighed, pushing his hair back, only for it to fall in his eyes again. "I forbade him to speak at all. He has to write us or text us, period. And... I'm not sure about waiting until we get back to Japan for him to be looked at, but it might be best. Make an appointment now."

Kaoru huffed slightly and nodded, tugging his notepad to him and scribbling down a few things then looked back up at Die. "I'm trusting you to keep him in line. Keep him quiet, get whatever throat medicines you and Nora can find into him and make him rest. That's all I know to do for right now. At least we're nearing the end of this leg."

Die nodded. "I won't let you down, Kaoru... remember, I'm doubly invested in this. He's as good as under my care right now and I know he'll pay attention to me." He sighed, shaking his head. "I... I need to get back to him."

Kaoru looked at Die for a moment, then reached out and patted his shoulder, nodding. "I know, just don't forget to take care of Die too..." He released the guitarist and then went back to his work, his look a lot more pinched than it was before.

Kyo was having trouble keeping quiet as he kept waking up from horrible nightmares, thrashing in the bunk and found himself calling out to Die only to have fire claw his throat and barely a harsh whisper come out. It hurt so bad it made him sick to his stomach and tears spring to his eyes. He was alone at that moment and scared out of his mind about this.

Die made his way quickly back to the bus, climbing in and heading straight for the bunks. The moment he found Kyo, looking distressed and freaked out. He gasped, falling to his knees and gathering Kyo up. "Baby, baby, calm down. Sshhhh, don't talk. It'll be okay, whatever it is, it'll be okay. I'll make it okay," he let out, convinced he could do this.

The instant Die showed up, his mind awoke fully and he took a shuddering breath, reaching out to cling to Die, his heart thumping too loudly in his ears. He buried his head against Die's chest, feeling at least safe for the moment. He took in another deep breath before he stilled against Die, just shaking his head.

Die reached toward the other, gently rubbing his hands over the other's back. "Sshhhh... just breathe, my love." He tilted his head up and peppered his face with kisses. "You're amazing and you make me tingle just from thinking about you," he murmured softly, trying to get Kyo to focus on him instead of his pain.

Kyo did as Die bid, taking another couple of deep breaths then looking up at his lover, the barest of smiles pushing through his pain-laced expression. He reached up and patted Die's face then sighed. He hated feeling pathetic like this, needing someone to take care of him.

Die reached to gently caress his cheek. "Baby... even in your pain, you are beautiful." He gave him a sad little smile and then sat back, pulling Kyo with him, into his lap. He settled against the wall and kissed the side of Kyo's head.

Kyo flushed and then shook his head, batting at Die before settling down and grabbing up his notebook and pen, writing on it then showing it to Die. "I'm starving, but I'm scared to eat anything that isn't the consistency of baby food."

Die leaned over to read the paper and then he smiled softly. "I'll fix it, baby. Just go sit at the table and we'll fix it, okay?" He got up once Kyo was out of his lap. 

Kyo blinked at Die then nodded though he was skeptical at just how Die could fix it. He padded into the bathroom and relieved himself, washing his hands then making his way to the table, sitting with his feet curled under him.

Die wandered over to get his phone off the counter. He dialed Kuroo, knowing he was the man for this job. Once the other answered, he quickly asked him to go find someplace with baked potato soup and get two big containers of it. He hung up after a minute and smiled, coming to sit down next to Kyo, putting his arm around him. "Solved, baby."

When Die came in, he leaned against the other and gave him a tiny smile. He still didn't know how Die was going to fix it, but he had to trust him in this.

Die gently turned Kyo and began to rub at his shoulders, massaging out the knots in his lover's back and shoulders. It would do him no good to be worked up like that. "You're okay, baby." Though he said it more to help himself than anything.

Kyo would have let out a groan at Die's administrations to the bunched up and knotted muscles in his back, but instead settled for reaching back and stroking Die's leg, hoping he understood.

Die smiled softly, concentrating on Kyo's back. After a few minutes, he just started lightly rubbing, kissing the side of the other's head gently. "Baby, I love you."

Kyo leaned into Die, moving his hand to find the other's and squeeze it tightly. He gave a lame nod of his head, turning and mouthing, "I love you," back to Die. He pursed his lips then leaned back, placing a kiss to Die's cheek.

Die offered the other a little smile and ruffled his hair. "We need to learn sign language," he murmured softly, hearing the door open and looking up to see Kuroo coming in with two heavy bags. 

Kyo laughed silently, having been already thinking that. He shifted to a sitting position as Kuroo came in with his load, curious about what it could be.

One of the bags was passed off to Toshiya, the other handed right to Die, containing two huge containers of baked potato soup, complete with cheese, bacon bits, and sour cream on top. Die thanked him and went about opening them, pushing one in front of Kyo with the plastic spoon.

When Die opened the container of soup and set it in front of him, he looked almost happy, the smell wafting to his nose and making his stomach growl loudly. Without waiting, he grabbed up his spoon and dug in, the soup rich and tasty as well soothing to his throat.

Die grinned as he watched Kyo start eating with gusto. He reached to run a hand over his lover's hair. "See, told you I'd solve it." He started to eat his own soup, doing so a bit slower than the vocalist.

Kyo paused between bites to smile softly at Die, leaning over to kiss the side of his mouth, licking a bit of sour cream from the corner of his lips before going back to his soup. He realized it was odd to be that happy over soup, but right then, he didn't care.

Die chuckled, already feeling a bit better that he was actually eating something and looking a bit less horrible for the wear. He went back to eating his soup, finding that he'd been more hungry than he'd thought.

Despite his initial gusto, Kyo only got a third of a way into the container before leaning back and rubbing his stomach, letting out a burp with a slight wince. He didn't think he'd ever get used to American portions.

Die chuckled when Kyo stopped, finishing off his own quite easily. When he actually did eat, he tended to do so in quantity, it was just a sad fact of his eating habits. He picked up the container and tossed it in the trash, recapping Kyo's and putting it in the fridge for later.

Kyo stayed in the booth where he was, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. He felt some peace settle in for the moment, his throat temporarily soothed by the thick, warm soup. He didn't dare try to talk or anything though.

Die came back and settled down, leaning on the table and glancing at Kyo, his mood back to a bit sourer than before. "Baby... did my e-cig do this to you?"

Kyo lifted his head, frowning at Die's question. He sighed and shook his head firmly. No, the e-cig didn't have anything to do with it, he was sure. This had started when they were still in Europe, he'd just been pushing it away and ignoring it.

Die looked down at the table after Kyo's answer and then nodded. "Okay... you promise?" he looked back up, a worried look in his eyes.

Kyo reached out and grasped Die's hand, squeezing and nodding, letting out in a soft whisper. "Promise..."

Die made a little tiny sound and then sighed, rubbing over Kyo's back. "Okay," he murmured.

Kyo felt guilt wash over him. He should have told Die what was going on from the start, but he'd been pushing it away, hiding it from him and the rest of the band.

Die flicked his eyes up to the other man, studying him for a long few minutes before sighing softly. "Okay, so... any ideas on what kind of meds soothes it the most?"

Kyo snorted lightly, thinking of a few prescription pain pills that would surely take the edge off. He wasn't about to go that route though, not without an actual prescription. The last thing he needed was to be busted for drugs or something.

With a sigh, he shook his head and grabbed the notebook, writing in it then passing it to Die. _Nothing over the counter except something like that Theraflu stuff and ibuprofen._

Die made a little face and then hummed softly under his breath. "Nothing... better?" he gestured at Kyo's throat. "The last time, what'd they give you? I'll see if I can get our doctor on the line to call something in if need be. I don't think Theraflu is gonna help you."

Kyo bit his lip and took a moment to remember then scribbled it out on the paper, adding _something like that..._ after the name of the med.

Die nodded a little and pulled out his phone, sending off a few quick texts. It was a few minutes before he got an incoming call and he answered it, slipping away from the table, the scrap of paper with the name of the drug on it clutched tightly in his hand.

Kyo watched Die go then curled up more in the booth, eventually just laying down in it and dozing off, somehow looking more like a child than anything.

Die came back some time later, having spoken with the doctor, gotten a prescription in for something more powerful than the last time, and then with Nora, asking her to pick it up before they departed for the night, the pharmacy a block away promising to have it ready in under fifteen minutes. He sat down next to Kyo and reached to gently stroke his hair. He'd wanted to talk tonight, but now was not the time and he was honestly pretty sure his own problems were nothing in comparison to this. He almost felt ashamed for what had happened earlier in the day affecting him at all with Kyo like this now.

Kyo woke up to Die stroking his hair and had to smile a little, reaching out to catch that hand and hold it for a moment before sitting up. He gave Die a little pout then gestured with his hands that he was thirsty before scribbling in the notepad. _I remembered that you wanted to talk. I'd like to... it'll help take my mind off this crap._

Die looked at the other, a confused look on his face before he nodded. He didn't really want to right then, given how it made him feel like shit to even think his problems were worth anything right then. But if Kyo asked for it, then he'd do it without question. "I got your meds ordered... and... okay, but just know I feel like it's nothing in comparison, okay?"

Kyo patted Die's arm then nodded, waving his hand. He didn't think that at all, but he wanted to give Die the chance to air out anything that was bothering him instead of having all of the attention on himself.

Die looked back down at the table and then sighed, pushing shaking hands through his hair. "I'm scared," he murmured, glancing around to make sure the others were safely out of earshot or not on the bus. "I'm scared of what Nora found out, I'm scared what she thinks. If anyone else found out... if they know... what do they think of me? I feel... disgusting." And that was to put it lightly. He felt worthless... less than human for what he enjoyed and how far out of the norm that it was.

Kyo frowned a little and reached out to rub Die's back, shaking his head. He didn't think Nora had figured out the real reason behind their messy clothes, but something told him that even if she did, she'd ignore and go on much like she did when having to clean up after a night of drinking.

He set to writing again, telling Die as much. _Don't be scared, baby. I don't think anyone else knows._

Die glanced at the message and then shook his head, looking away. "But it doesn't change how I feel about myself. I thought I could keep everything hidden away, keep everyone else out of my business, but... I guess I'm as stupid here as I ever was with fucking around in my younger years. Reckless and bullheaded."

Kyo bit his lip, feeling guilty because he'd been pushing Die's fetish a lot lately, eager to see his lover come undone. He sighed softly, frowning. _Reckless and bullheaded would be doing it on the damn street corners with strangers._

The guitarist looked again at the paper and then shrugged. "I know... but... it just _uggh_... can you see the look on Kaoru's face? Shinya's? Toshiya's? Because I can, and it's horrifying."

Kyo shook his head, wincing a bit at the thought. No, he couldn't imagine the look on their faces at all, but what business was it of theirs? _We'll just have to be careful._ He knew that was pathetic reassurance, but he was at a loss as to what to say to make Die feel better about the whole ordeal.

Die let out a little sigh and leaned down to rest his head on the table, peering at Kyo and his writing. "I think... whenever we're around anyone else, we shouldn't do any of that stuff. Just... normal stuff."

Kyo just nodded, reaching over to pat Die's leg softly, flipping the notebook closed for now.

Die closed his eyes and just rested there, feeling sour about how he was reacting to it, thinking himself not worthy to do this sort of thing right then. But Kyo had wanted to talk about it, so he had.

Kyo watched Die with a critical eye, seeing the slight self-loathing there. He let out a huff and swatted the back of Die's head lightly, opening his notebook again scribbling out, _Stop it!_

Die jerked a bit and peered at the pad as Kyo wrote out words that felt like he was yelling at him. How on earth he could get something so clearly out in paper-written words was beyond Die. But it was one of many reasons he loved him, nonetheless. He shrugged a little. "I have to get over it, baby... I can't help that it bothers me."

Kyo gave Die a slightly pinched look then nodded, reaching out to pat Die's arm lightly. He knew the situation had gotten to his lover but he wasn't sure how to reassure him that it would okay.   
Die sighed and reached to touch Kyo's cheek. "Just bear with me, sweetheart. I'll figure it out at some point. I promise."

Kyo leaned into the touch, nodding slightly then giving a yawn, wincing slightly at the strain on his throat. He pouted afterward, feeling grumpy that he couldn't even yawn properly.

Die leaned in and pecked his lips a little, giving him a gentle smile. "It's okay."

Kyo let out a huff then shifted, making himself comfortable against Die. Truthfully, he was fighting the urge to do as he normally did when he was feeling this amount of pain and inner turmoil. He usually wanted to lock himself in his bunk or some other dark corner and shut out the world.

Die gently tugged Kyo's sleeve. "Come on, baby... let's go get some rest, okay?"

Kyo blinked a bit, having dozed slightly. He nodded and shifted out of the booth, stretching then leading the way to the bunks, holding up a finger as he crawled into his own, coming out a moment later with pajama pants in his hand.

Die gave him a little smile, waiting on Kyo to finish grabbing his pants and then reaching for the vocalist's belt, pulling him close and then unfastening it and then his pants as well. With that done, he slid them down his hips and knelt, waiting on him to step out of them.

Kyo blinked in surprise as Die began helping him undress, but he let him, and stepped out of his jeans, careful not to fall as he reached out to steady himself with one hand on Die's shoulder.

Die grinned at him and then got up, folding up Kyo's pants and putting them aside on the counter. He took his pajama pants and knelt down with them, holding them out for Kyo to step into.

Kyo offered Die a smile as he stepped into his pajamas, feeling a bit silly. His throat hurting had nothing to with his ability to dress himself. However, he just complied with his lover, secretly loving the pampering.

Die stood up with the pants, drawing them up Kyo's legs and then patting his ass lightly. "Good... we're perfect." He kissed his nose and then gestured to the bathroom. "I'll be right back."

Kyo laughed silently then nodded, moving to crawl into the bunk to make himself comfortable while Die took care of business.

Die wandered into the bathroom, quickly relieving himself and then stripping down to his boxers. He came out with his clothing folded up, put it aside on the counter as well, and then put on his silk pajama pants. He crawled into bed and curled up against Kyo's side.

Kyo pulled Die to him as soon as the other entered the bunk. He leaned in and placed a lingering kiss on his lips, reaching up to run fingers through his hair.

Die made a little sound of pleasure and then chuckled. "Mmm... we're all so touchy-feely and I love it."

Kyo paused for a moment to realize that he had been sort of touchy with Die that evening. He just shook his head and dropped his hand down to goose Die's rear end with a good pinch.

Die let out a little yelp and immediately there was a cough and a laugh from the other side of the bunks.

Kyo chuckled softly then settled down, laying his head against Die's shoulder, closing his eyes.

Die put his arms around him and ran his hand over the other's back, chuckling softly. "I love you..." he was trying so hard to keep Kyo in a good mood right then, but it was getting exhausting.

Kyo nuzzled into Die then looked up, mouthing the same words back to his other before finally closing his eyes and letting sleep take him away.

Die waited until Kyo was asleep, this time trying to sleep himself, not at all wanting a repeat of before. He licked his lips a little and leaned in toward him, closing his eyes.


	18. Chapter 18

Die found himself having a fitful night of sleep, not the best in the world, but not the worst because he'd gotten at least gotten some. At long last, he dragged himself out of bed, went about his morning routine and then came back to bed, kneeling down and leaning over Kyo. He pressed one finger to Kyo's lips and then gently shook him, seeing if he'd wake up for him.

Kyo had been plagued with nightmares throughout the night, but then had finally just sort of passed out from exhaustion. When Die started shaking him, he opened one bleary and went to speak before realizing there was a finger over his lips and he wasn't supposed to talk anyway. "...."

"Good morning, my sweet." Die gave him a soft smile and removed his finger. "Scale of one to five, how much does it hurt?" he murmured softly. "Hold up your fingers."

Kyo offered Die a small smile, reaching out to pat his arm lightly. At the question, he hesitated and swallowed a bit, wincing as the pain was still there, though it had abated some thanks to the medication. He sighed softly and held up three fingers then crooked one to indicate two and a half.

Die nodded a little. "Better than last night at least." He brushed some of Kyo's hair back from his face and then held out his phone. "What do you want to eat for breakfast?"

Kyo nodded and just leaned in, pecking Die's lips with his own slightly chapped ones. When he pulled back, he took Die's phone, opened the notes application, and typed in one word. "Miso".

Die took it and read it, smiling slightly from the kiss he'd just received. "Mmm... that I can do without leaving the bus." He slid backward a bit. "Get ready and come sit out here and I'll make us miso." He pulled out of the bunk entirely and went to his bag, rooting and then coming up with a green bag of instant miso fixings. He went to the sink area and started filling the bowls with water, adding the miso paste. He peered around the bus, seeing if anyone else was awake, he could hear Kaoru still snoring in his bunk at the very least.

Kyo nodded and scooted out of the bunk, stretching and grunting as his back popped. He stood and wandered into the bathroom to relieve himself and rinse his hands and face before heading back out to where Die was, rubbing his hand over the other's back as he moved to sit at the table.

Die didn't see anyone else milling around and so he only made two bowls. He moved to sit next to Kyo with his bag of supplies and held up the little foil packets. "Tofu, green onion, or uh... whatever this unlabeled one is?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose the pointed to the green onion one, not wanting to risk the unlabeled one as being something horrid.

Die opened the packet and dumped it in Kyo's soup. He added the tofu one to his own and put the unlabeled one back in for another day. He pulled out two disposable spoons and passed one to Kyo, mixing his soup with his own, waiting on the tofu to hydrate for him.

Kyo had to smile as Die fixed his soup for him, despite his being perfectly capable of doing it himself. He took the spoon and stirred it around, letting everything incorporate as he yawned and leaned into Die.

It almost felt like one of their lazy mornings at home when he and Die would fix breakfast and just lounge around with mussed hair and pajamas, not bothering to get dressed until late in the day if at all.

Die leaned toward Kyo almost involuntarily, finally getting his soup how he wanted it and just picking up the bowl, sipping at it that way given that they were still on the road and he didn't like slopping soup all over himself.

Kyo poked at his soup a bit more then followed Die's example, picking his bowl up and sipping at it, the warm liquid soothing his still raw throat. He took his time, slowly sipping as he gazed out the window at the passing scenery before finally setting his bowl down and looking up at Die. He cleared his throat and opened his mouth, attempting to speak. "Thanks..." He winced as it came out hoarse and scratchy, a frustrated look passing over his face.

Die instantly looked over at Kyo when he spoke and shook his head. "Don't. No talking, only singing at the show. I don't think you should do sound check either. Kuroo will do it, he knows how to make most of your practice sounds to see if things are set right. But, baby, please, please don't talk." He put his soup down and reached over to gently touch Kyo's cheek. "Please." He still felt partially at fault for this and he didn't want to let the other do more damage if at all possible.

Kyo bit his lip as Die begged him not to talk anymore or do the sound check. He sighed and nodded, leaning into Die's touch some. He could tell the other was blaming himself and he hated it. He hated the whole thing. He didn't want to rely on others to do his talking for him or his sound checks or anything else for that matter. He waved his hand in an agitated gesture and just nodded again for lack of any other way to communicate.

Die leaned in and kissed Kyo's cheek, remaining there for a long moment, his eyes closed as he wrestled his emotions back into check. Pulling back, he gave Kyo a pathetic hint of a smile and then picked up his soup, silently drinking it.

Kyo let out another sigh and reached up to pet Die's hair then turned to take the last sip of his own soup before standing and putting the bowl in the sink. He went to get his notebook then came back out to sit next to Die again, scribbling on it. "This sucks."

Die finished up his soup and sat there, watching Kyo move around. He turned the notebook so he could see it better and then nodded. "I know... it does, baby."

Kyo huffed a little and put his head in his hands. He wanted to throw a tantrum, kick things, break something. It was really starting to get to him and being cooped up in this tour bus wasn't helping. He grabbed the notebook again and wrote, "I wanna get out, go shopping, whatever."

Die let out a soft sound and then pulled out his phone, doing a quick search of the area. It seemed they were in butt-fuck nowhere and the only thing was about ten miles ahead, a place called 66 Joe's which he could only assume from the store sign next to it was something seedy. He arched an eyebrow. "There's what is likely a porn shop. You up for it?" He chuckled.

Kyo considered it for a moment then gave a shrug, figuring it'd at least get him out of the bus for a few minutes. He scribbled, "That'll work." and then leaned back in his seat, closing his eyes.

Die got up and wandered to the front, telling the driver to pull off at the shop if it looked open. He went back to the bunk area and quickly put on some clothing, pulling on a hoodie. He went to the bathroom and washed his hands and face, quickly brushing his teeth. When he came back out, he smelled of mint, but still had some stubble.

Kyo waited until Die was finished dressing to get up and do the same, pulling on his hoodie over his track pants, not really caring right then about his appearance. He went and brushed his teeth then looked in the mirror, snorting at his reflection. He looked tired, worn, and scruffy. He turned and moved more towards the front of the bus to peer out of the bigger windows, seeing the store sign up ahead.

Die came along behind Kyo and made sure he had his wallet and cell phone. He nudged Kyo. "Do you have your ID? I bet they'll check us since it's friggin broad daylight."

Kyo stuck his hands in his pockets and realized he didn't have any such ID so he held up a finger and moved to the back, digging in his bag for his wallet and stuffing it into his pocket before rejoining Die.

Die smiled as the bus turned into the parking lot and bumped along to a stop, gravel crunching under the bus' tires. He heaved out a soft sigh and stepped down, opening the bus door and slipping out, pushing his sunglasses on as he stepped down onto the ground. He waited on Kyo and then shut the door, heading straight for the shop.

Kyo tugged his hood over his head and followed along with Die, his feet crunching in the gravel as they walked towards the shop. He noted that it wasn't too awful even if it was a bit run down.

Die opened the door and slipped inside, fishing out his ID as the man at the desk lazily asked to see it. He handed his over and the man looked puzzled. Die sighed and pointed at the date area, reading off, "20 December, and year." He tapped the year a few times and took his glasses off to show it was him. The man nodded and held his hand out for Kyo.

Kyo held out his own ID, following suit and pointing at his birth date. The man shrugged and handed it back after a second. Kyo took it, put it away, then turned to Die, nodding towards the toy section.

Die smirked a bit and headed down the first aisle, turning out to be magazines on one side, books on the other. His eyes raked over the various covers, feeling his heartbeat speed up a bit in his chest as he caught sight of some rather raunchy guy/guy magazines.

Kyo wandered off to look at the various offerings of novelty toys, snorting when he found some pretty horrid looking blow up dolls. He opened his mouth to say something to Die then remembered and pulled out his phone, shooting off a text instead. "Should get one of these male blow ups for Kao, put it in his bunk or something."

Die felt his phone vibrate and he pulled it out just as he'd been about to reach for a book on exotic sexual situations. He smirked a little and shot a text back off. "Go for it if you dare. I bet he'll have a heart attack." He gave the book another look and then abandoned it. The last thing he needed as more fetishes right then. He moved on to the various lubes, trying a few on his fingers.

Kyo just laughed silently then moved on to the vibes and plugs, huffing when none seemed to strike him. Instead, he wandered on over to where Die was, pointing to an exotic looking bottle of lube. He picked it up and sniffed it, raising an eyebrow when he found it to be cherry blossom scented. He held it to Die for inspection, smirking a little.

Die gave Kyo a small smile when he came over to view the lubes with him. He sniffed it and let out a little groan. "Buying that," he murmured. He moved on toward the toys section, seeing a very lovely red prostate massager that he eyeballed for a moment before flushing slightly and moving on down the row.

Kyo grinned and picked up a bottle that wasn't used as a tester and moved down the aisle with Die, seeing the look on his lover's face at the prostate massager and just picked it up as well.

After looking at a few more things, Kyo left Die to his own devices and went to pay for his items. He had some difficulty understanding the cashier but finally managed to get it all paid for then just went and stood near the door to wait for Die. He was glad the others hadn't decided to join them, figuring it might be a bit awkward if they had.

Die ended up in the DVD aisle and he found himself staring at a few of the more raunchy ones that portrayed women with dicks fucking men, the title proclaiming TREMENDOUS TRANNIES! He moved away from those as well and finally went back to the magazine aisle, picking up a good gay one with lots of blowjobs and a box of condoms along with a small tube of lube. He paid for his items and got them put into a bag. He gave Kyo a little smile and then headed out the door.

Kyo followed Die out, taking a moment to reach out and grasp the other's hand. He was feeling a little better after getting out of the bus, albeit a bit horny now, given the nature of the store they'd just visited.

Die gave Kyo a soft smile and squeezed his hand. After a moment, they arrived at the bus and he opened it, holding up his hand to allow Kyo to get in in front of him.

Kyo walked onto the bus and offered Kaoru a little wave as he headed back to his bunk to store his purchases, not in the mood for any sort of ribbing and such. He stashed everything under his pillow then moved back out to make some tea while the bus was stopped.

Die let Kyo get into the bus, following him in, securing the door behind them. He glanced up, seeing Kaoru waving back to Kyo and he sat down next to him quickly, pushing the black bag over to him on the seat. "For you. Thought you might find it... useful."

Kaoru gave Die a confused sort of look and opened the bag, pulling out the lube and examining it, then seeing the condoms, and finally the porno mag. He shoved the bag shut and gasped. "Die... uh... wow...."

Toshiya, having inconvenient timing, wandered out then, looking bedraggled from sleep. He plopped down beside Kaoru and rubbed his eyes. "What's up? Why're we stopped?"

Kaoru flapped his mouth a little bit, not having any idea what to tell the other.

Die cleared his throat. "Kyo and I went to see the porno store." He pulled the bag back toward him, deciding it'd be his until Toshiya was none the wiser.

Toshiya blinked at Kaoru's reaction then glanced out the window before laughing a little. "Nice! Did they have anything good?"

Kyo came to sit down next to Die with his tea and shrugged in response to Toshiya's question, waving his hand a little.

Die scooted closer to Kyo and looked between the other pair. "Yeah, they did... but just got basics really... lube."

Kaoru shifted slightly in his seat, glancing at the bag.

Toshiya looked out at the store again then shrugged, not really interested in it because so far, he and Kaoru hadn't done anything remotely sexual save for that one heated kiss. He gave a small sigh at that and then turned back around, a smile back on his face. "How's your throat Kyo? Feeling any better?"

Kyo peered at Toshiya then Kaoru, frowning slightly then looking at the bassist. He waved his hand to indicate he was a little better then shrugged and shifted, leaning against Die's shoulder some.

Die glanced between them and then abruptly made a decision that he might regret. He picked up the bag and plucked out the magazine. He tossed it on the table, it falling open to a slim white man blowing a rather muscled black man. He pointed between them. "For the love of god, the sexual tension is going to strangle me. At least show your cocks to one another." He nudged Kyo a bit. "C'mon, baby."

Kaoru stared at Die with a look of something like horror on his face. He half reached for the magazine and then put his hand back down in his lap, making a rather good fish face again.

Kyo raised an eyebrow then nodded in agreement with Die, standing up and heading into the back of the bus, a smirk on his face. Hopefully, his lover had made the right move because it was definitely ridiculous for Toshiya and Kaoru to be acting like virginal teens.

\---

Die settled down next to Kyo and reached to touch the other's hair gently. "Would it make this easier on you if I couldn't talk, too? If we both have to write?"

Kyo nodded then waved his hand, shaking his head before leaning against Die with a sigh, scribbling something else down. "No but you could occupy your mouth..." Porn shops always had the tendency to get him going and since they had the slightest bit of privacy with Toshiya and Kaoru occupied and Shinya sound asleep, he'd been thinking of taking advantage.

Die arched his eyebrow at the other when he read what he'd wrote. "Is that so?" he murmured, chuckling softly. He leaned in and gently kissed Kyo on the lips before slipping down off the bunk and between Kyo's knees. "Take it out for me and show me how horny you are," he purred out, popping the top on his beer and taking a swig.

Kyo smirked a little and leaned back some, unzipped his jeans and pulling his half-hard cock out. He took a moment to stroke himself to full hardness, flexing in his own hand, his mouth opening in a silent groan as he worked himself up quickly. 

Die took another mouthful of beer and didn't swallow it. Instead he leaned in and pressed his lips against Kyo's cock. Slowly, he let him slip in, the beer floating around in his mouth with Kyo's rock-hard dick. He swallowed it, looking up at the other and feeling triumphant. Two of his favorite things combined: head and beer.

Kyo raised an eyebrow at Die's actions, then found himself gripping the sheets at the dual sensations of cold beer and Die's hot mouth on his cock. It felt pretty damn good, especially when Die swallowed and he bucked his hips up, asking for more, his hand going to Die's hair.

Die chuckled softly, pulling up from his cock. "Liked that, did you?" He licked his lips and picked up the bottle, trickling some beer down Kyo's cock, lapping it up with his tongue as he did it.

Kyo let out the quietest moan, nodding his head. As the beer dripped over his cock, he shuddered, the cold being almost too much, but Die's tongue taking care of that real quick.

Die let out a little groan and smirked as he took another swig of beer and repeated the process of sucking on Kyo's cock and swallowing around him. He was enjoying the combination of beer and his lover's dick quite a bit, particularly enjoying the way he was reacting to it.

Kyo gave Die's hair a little tug, his cock jerking a bit. The sensation was unusual, but it felt damn good and he loved the way Die seemed to be enjoying himself. He pulled his lover's hair to get his attention and mouthed out, "God!"

Die looked up at Kyo when he pulled his hair, watching him at the way he mouthed out what he was feeling. He swallowed around him again and then started bobbing his head, intent on making the other lose his load as quickly as possible, wanting to see Kyo come undone so fast.

Kyo gazed down at Die for as long as he could, but ended up dropped his head back and squeezing his eyes closed as immense pleasure washed over him. His lover's mouth was like heaven around his cock and he couldn't stop himself from pushing up into it, fingers abusing the other's hair slightly.

After another moment, he slipped his hand under his shirt and scratched over his chest lightly, mouth dropping open as he was pushed over the edge, cock jerking as he spilled his load down Die's throat.

Die was utterly and entirely amazed as he watched Kyo reach to start to scratch over his chest. He groaned around the other's dick and then in the next moment he felt his cock jump in his mouth. His eyes widened as he felt the hot cum start spurting into his mouth. He swallowed around him a few times, whimpering softly as he sucked diligently.

Kyo bit his lip hard to keep from moaning as he came. He let out a breath and settled back, petting Die's hair for a moment then leaning down to cup his chin, kissing him hard, dipping his tongue in to taste the combination of beer and cum.

Die leaned in toward the other and allowed him to kiss him, smirking a bit into the kiss. He'd definitely enjoyed that and he had the arousal to prove it. He swallowed and then chuckled. "I got you off so fast, baby... I take it you liked my idea?"

Kyo snorted in response the pointed to the bunk, indicating that he wanted Die to get into it. He wanted to return the favor, but he'd have to do it in a different manner, one that Die hopefully enjoyed.

Die gave Kyo a curious sort of look. After a moment, he reached up and gently cupped Kyo's cheek. "You're not allowed to suck me off, baby." He leaned up and kissed him gently before moving to get into the bunk, settling down.

Kyo nodded then scooted into the bunk, shifting around then undoing Die's pants and pulling them down, getting them off so he could spread the other's legs a bit. He reached and dug out the bag from the store, getting out the cherry blossom lube and putting some on his hand before wrapping it around Die's length, stroking him slowly for the moment.

Die watched Kyo curiously, allowing him full reign of what was going to happen. He shivered slightly and arched up into Kyo's touch once he was using the lube on him. The scent of cherry blossoms filled the area and he felt like he was in dual heaven, letting out a tiny groan.

Kyo might not have been allowed to suck Die off, but that didn't stop him from using his mouth as he dipped his head down to nip and suck at Die's thigh while he worked his hand over his cock. He didn't stay there long though and soon moved his slick hand down to cup and roll Die's sac before going even further and pushing one finger into his body, glancing up at his face to see his reaction.

Die let out a gasp as the other started to finger him, beyond excited for the prospect of the other man fondling him like this. He spread his legs a little more. "Baby... god, please."

Kyo gave Die a smirk, pleased with his reaction and started wiggling his finger, pushing it in and out. He knew Die could take so much more, but he loved toying with him like this. He even shifted and placed small kisses and licks to the head of his dick.

Die let out a soft moan and closed his eyes, arching his hips up. "I... this... oh gods," he breathed out, hips arching up toward the other.

While Die was distracted by it all, Kyo quietly pulled out the prostate massager and lubed it up. He kept up his licks to Die's dick as he slowly and carefully pushed the toy into him.

Die immediately tensed for a moment and then relaxed when the other started to push a toy in. He groaned faintly and tilted his head up to watch what the other was doing. "Oh god, baby... you bought it," he murmured, letting out a breathless sort of gasp when it got to where it felt really good.

Kyo smirked up at Die and shifted around a bit so he could start pushing the toy in and out, rubbing against Die's prostate slowly for a moment, then turning it on the lowest setting.

Die let out a louder groan as the other started to thrust the toy in and out of his body. With the vibrations added, it made all the difference in the world. Immediately he had to yank his pillow over his face, his pleasured cries being voiced to the whole of the bus, albeit muffled now.

Kyo had to bite his own lip, finding himself squirming a bit as Die cried out. He rotated the toy and pressed it directly against Die's prostate, wondering vaguely if he could cum just from this.

Die's hips bucked and his cries grew incredibly louder, one hand flailing around until he found Kyo's hand that wasn't holding onto the toy, grasping it firmly.

Kyo squeezed Die's hand and backed off a little, pulling the toy out for a minute as he leaned down to press a few kisses to Die's quivering stomach. He gave it a moment, then slowly slid the toy back in, wiggling it a bit.

Die lay there, trembling, a fine sheen of sweat having broken out on his skin in such a short period of time. This was unreal and he couldn't have been happier to have such a toy in his possession. He gently squeezed Kyo's hand as the other slid the toy back into his body.

Kyo loved the way Die looked at that moment, so beautiful in his pleasure. He shifted some more and moved the pillow to press his lips against Die's as he started lightly thrusting the toy in and out, grazing Die's sweet spot over and over.

Die immediately had to start trying to not let out too many amazing sounds. He clung to Kyo's wrist and reached up to grab his hair as well, whimpering softly and bucking up into the thrusts. He was already straining toward his orgasm again, completely pleased with the whole thing.

Kyo leaned into Die, knowing his was close to losing it, the sounds issuing from his gorgeous lips being testament to that. He nuzzled Die's neck as pushed the toy in against the perfect spot then turned the vibration up a notch, mouthing the words, "Cum for me," against his neck.

It didn't even take Kyo mouthing the words, rather the moment the vibration was turned up and pressed against his prostate, he was a goner. He let out a loud cry of Kyo's name, jerking his hips upward as he started to spurt cum out over is abdomen and thighs, some of it landing on Kyo's hand as well.  
Kyo bit his lip as Die came, his name being cried out so beautifully that it made his heart flip flop. He turned off the toy but left it in place for the moment, his other hand slipping down to brush over Die's length, smearing in the mess there.

Die shivered, whimpering faintly as the other started to rub over him and stroke over his cock a little bit more. He let out a faint whine, hips squirming under the other's actions.

Kyo kept it up for a few moments before finally pulling away and easing the toy from Die's body, setting it aside. He leaned up and kissed Die's lips softly then grabbed some tissues from the box they had stashed in there and started wiping up, first his hand, then Die's stomach and thighs.

Die lay there, panting softly, his entire body feeling like it was on fire from what had just transpired. He blushed something awful after a moment, turning quite red. "I suppose I owe everyone an apology for my er... loudness... yeah?"

Kyo laughed silently and shrugged a bit, shifting and peering out of the bunk curtains to see if anyone was looking their way. Fortunately, it seemed that they either didn't notice or were nice enough to not interrupt at least.

Die quietly moved to put his pants back on and then slid out of the bunk. He let out a little grunt and patted Kyo's back. "I'll go and wash up and then apologize anyway."

Kyo nodded and scooted out of the bunk, going to dispose of the tissues in the bathroom trash, waiting for Die to wash up so he could wash his own hands and the toy.

Die washed up his hands and his abdomen. After a moment, he patted himself dry and then ran his fingers over Kyo's arm before he moved off toward the other's. "Hey... um... guys?" he asked quietly, peering out into the main area.

Kyo moved into the bathroom and shut the door, going about cleaning the toy really well and then his hands, feeling a little bad suddenly that Die was having to apologize.

Toshiya looked up from the porn mag Die had left earlier and raised an eyebrow. "Yes~?" He smirked a bit as he set the magazine down.

Die shifted on his feet. "I'm... sorry... I was so loud. I just couldn't help it." He ducked his head a little and glanced at Kaoru, who just shrugged, looking up from his phone where he'd been texting someone.

Toshiya just cackled, waggling his finger. "I could tell! Must've been some good head or something~" He grinned, reaching out to poke Die in the ribs, feeling like teasing the other.

Die let out a soft huff. "Or something," he murmured. But at least he got the point that the other didn't care that he'd been loud.

Toshiya just smirked and waved his hand before holding up the magazine with it open to a page with two guys fucking on the beach. "Could you do that? I'd hate getting sand everywhere!"

Kyo wandered out and patted Die on the back, waving at the others then digging in the fridge for some water. He shrugged a bit at the beach picture. He'd probably want a towel or something at least.

Die made a little face and then laughed. "With Kyo... I'd do it anywhere honestly."

Toshiya snorted and grinned at Kyo. "Of course you would." He shrugged then got comfortable again, leaning slightly on Kaoru as he continued through the porn mag like it was a novel or something.

Kyo just smiled, reaching out and briefly squeezing Die's hand.

Die tugged Kyo closer and then gestured at him. "I mean... have you seen this man? I mean really really seen? He's fucking gorgeous." He kissed Kyo's cheek. "And amazing in bed," he purred out in his ear, "and cock like whoa." He laughed at his own terminology, rubbing his hand through Kyo's hair.

Kyo leaned into Die then blushed darkly as he started praising him, ducking his head and swatting at Die's ass. He loved it though, being fawned over by his lover.

Toshiya had to keep himself from rolling his eyes and instead just laughed. "Yes, Die, I've seen Kyo's cock though I'm sure not in as much detail as you have!"

Die pulled the other in front of him and ran his hands down Kyo's sides. "Oh, it's glorious in every single way." He chuckled softly and kissed the other's cheek. "And not to mention how amazing of a person he is." He nipped his ear. "And how much fun this is to say how much I adore him while he can't say shit to stop me."

Kaoru was watching the entire thing with an amused look on his face, shaking his head slightly. "It's almost pathetic how in love you are."

Kyo felt like his face was on fire by the time Die got finished. He finally resorted to, lightly, stomping on his foot and huffing like a petulant three year old. When Kaoru spoke, he just glowered at him, giving him the finger for lack up anything else to do.

Toshiya was laughing so hard by then that he was clutching his sides. "Oh my God, Die, you're like a fourteen year old!"

Die laughed, rubbing Kyo's hair again and smirking, feeling less ashamed now. "Mmm... you know you like it, Kyo. And yeah, I know it. But it's only the truth, honestly."

Kaoru smirked. "I am very much aware. And I'm happy for you."

Kyo just sighed and leaned into Die, a secret smile on his face as he reached back and caught one of the other's hands, squeezing tightly. Yes, he did actually like it to a point.

Toshiya just grinned and nodded. "Me, too, even if it is sickeningly sweet." And he was just a bit jealous, too.

Die smirked a little and then murmured, "Well, I think a nap is in order. Wake us in an hour, yeah?" He tugged Kyo along with him, looking way too pleased with himself.

Kaoru set an alarm on his phone and ran his hand over his beard, glancing over at Toshiya. "That was... certainly amusing."

Kyo waved at them as he was tugged along, just huffing a little at Die.

Toshiya peered over at Kaoru and laughed softly. "Yeah, I have to say, I never thought I'd see Kyo so... tamed."

Kaoru snorted. "He's far from tamed. Die just has a firm grasp on how to deal with him, he always has. Remember, he's always been the one to keep him at least in a neutral mood and get him up from his worst lows. It's the best thing for him, for sure."

Toshiya hummed and nodded. "Yeah, I suppose you're right." He bit his lip then glanced back towards the bunks before continuing on, his voice lowered. "I wonder how he's handling not being able to speak.."

Kaoru winced a little. "Not well I'd assume. But Die's certainly doing his job by trying to make sure he's distracted enough to not think about it every single second. But I think we need to keep an eye on Die as well. This is crushing him more than we could ever understand. It's not just his friend and bandmate, but his lover... and from what I heard, he thinks something is very, very wrong, not just his voice being lost temporarily."

Toshiya frowned, feeling an odd flop in the pit of his stomach. "You think? I mean, Kyo's had issues before... I just sort of assumed this was something like that."

"Die's convinced otherwise," Kaoru murmured, shrugging his shoulders. "I'm no expert, but we have an appointment set up for him the moment we're back in Japan. We've got two shows to get through and then we can get home and get him examined."

Toshiya ran a hand through his hair and nodded. "Good, I hope it's nothing though."

"Don't we all," Kaoru replied, heaving out a soft sigh. "Don't. We. All."


	19. Chapter 19

Die shifted a little in his airplane seat, wincing as he pulled himself out of a foggy sleep. He licked his lips and moved to sit up a bit more. After a moment, he put his hand on his belly, wincing, the need to pee after a few hours of sleep a bit intense. He sniffed and sat back, peering over at Kyo, seeing if his lover was awake or not.

Kyo was not having a good flight. He couldn't sleep and hadn't been able to since the previous night's show. And speaking of the show, his throat was on fire and no amount of water, tea, or whatever, was curing it. He'd even tried alcohol, but that had only numbed it for a few seconds before the inferno returned. He'd been sitting with his eyes closed for at least an hour, hoping that some God would take pity on him and let him at least pass out.

When Die shifted next to him, he cracked one eye open and peered at him. In a croaky voice, he spoke, "Good morning."

Die slid his arm around the other, gently embracing him before he pulled back and brushed his fingers over the other's cheek. "Hmm... Good morning, indeed. You doing okay?" He peered at him with sincere worry in his eyes.

Kyo leaned into Die's embrace then shrugged slightly. "I guess so." He glanced away, looking out the window at the endless expanse of ocean beneath them. "Have a good nap?"

"Baby..." Die sighed softly, shaking his head a little. "You don't have to lie about being okay, I can hear your voice, you know." He reached over, gently taking his hand and lifting it to kiss the back of it gently.

Kyo's face turned more sullen and he let out a sigh. Turning back to Die, he licked his lips, squeezing the other's hand. "Yeah, I know. So no, I'm not okay. I'm fucking exhausted and in pain and I'm ready to rip my esophagus out."

"I know, baby... I know." He gently ran his hand over Kyo's chest and then up to his neck, rubbing lightly over it. "Things need to be looked at. I just hope whatever it is can be solved."

Kyo swallowed reflexively as Die's hand brushed over his neck, then sighed again. "I hope so... but for now, I just want to sleep. It's been," he looked at his watched and huffed, "twenty six hours."

Die winced a bit and looked at his watch, seeing 9 hours left of their flight. He shifted and reached into his bag, pulling out a punch-pack of pills, popping two blue ones out and passing them to Kyo. "These will make you sleep, trust me on that. All natural, not addictive." He winced a bit and held his hand over his abdomen. "Uh... excuse me for a moment." With that, he bolted off toward the restroom.

Kyo took the pills, looking at them with some skepticism. He was no stranger to sleeping pills, not that he'd ever mentioned it to Die. There were just some nights that his mind wouldn't shut off and he'd needed them to obtain some grip on his sanity. He hadn't brought them with him though, because with Die, he found that he rarely needed them.

He watched Die bolt for the restroom with an odd look. He almost got up and followed him, but decided to leave it, picking up his water bottle and popping the pills, hoping like hell they worked.

Die made it to the restroom and relieved himself quickly in the blue plastic urinal. It seemed to take forever and by the time he was done, he was a little bit aroused and he felt honestly more than a little horrified that he was. He tucked himself back into his pants and headed back out to his seat. He settled down and reached for Kyo's hand, holding it gently in his own. "They're only mild pills, I promise."

Kyo shrugged and set his bottle back in the pouch of the seat in front of him, then squeezed Die's hand, glancing over at him. "Have a good piss? You were in there a while... for that anyway..." He knew he should probably be preserving his voice at this point, but he had gotten so sick of that stupid notebook.

Die glanced at him and blushed a little. "Er... yeah... just... a lot of it." He reached down to rub over his belly a little. "I seriously had my stomach pouching out."

Kyo reached down and patted Die's tummy. "I see. You been asleep or... just waiting?"

"Asleep, for a very long time." He sighed and licked his lips, gently kissing the other's hand again. "Mmm... so it'll take about fifteen minutes for those to kick in and then I promise, you'll be out like a light."

Kyo just nodded, shifting in his seat to lean his head against Die's shoulder. "Okay, I hope so. I'm so damn tired and my mind is going crazy." He huffed and held up a sketchbook he'd brought along, flipping a few pages of abstract pen drawings on every spare inch of each page.

Die reached over, gently taking the notebook from him and flipping through the pages slowly, looking at the drawings. "Wow, these are actually really good, Kyo. Have you considered doing anything with them?"

The vocalist shrugged, closing his eyes. "Not really. They're just doodles from the brink of insanity. Not exactly something you want to hang on the living room wall."

Die gave him a sad sort of look. "I'd hang it on my wall."

Kyo opened his eyes and glanced up at Die, peering at him for a moment before offering him a small smile. "You can keep them then." He leaned over and flipped to one page in the back, separate from the others, showing Die a hand with an intricately drawn snakeskin pattern on it, very obviously inspired by a certain tattoo.

Die peered at the drawing a smile spreading over his lips. "Baby, I've found my living room piece. I can see it now, right behind the couch." He gently closed the notebook and tucked it into his bag with great care, leaning over Kyo to grab a pen that was trying to escape, flailing around in his lap for a moment, and then settling back again.

Kyo couldn't help but feeling no small amount of pride at Die's reaction to his drawing. He ducked his head a bit, burying it more against Die's shoulder. "You're too sweet." He closed his eyes once more, actually starting to feel a bit drowsy. After a few quiet moments, he reached over and rubbed Die's leg, murmuring quietly, "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby." Die slid his arm around the other and pulled him close so he could rest there against him. "Sleep, sweetheart."

Kyo curled up more against Die, taking a deep breath then settling down. It took another twenty minutes, but he did finally fall asleep, the pills thankfully keeping nightmares or dreams of any kind, for that matter, away.

Die remained there the entire time, accepting a few drinks from the passing stewardesses, and cradling Kyo against him for the duration of the time that Kyo was passed out, occasionally readjusting him so he wouldn't snore, covering him with a blanket when he started shivering.

Kyo remained blissfully asleep for the better part of six hours, awakening only because the plane hit turbulence and caused his body to realize that his bladder was quite full. He groaned hoarsely as he came awake and scrubbed his hands over his face, squirming a bit. "Gotta piss," he whispered, unable to find his voice at that moment.

Die glanced down at him and gave him a little smirk, reaching to wipe a stray tear from Kyo's face from his eyes weeping during sleep. "Good morning to you, too, baby." He leaned down and gently kissed his lips and then gestured toward the bathroom. "No one's in there right now."

Kyo squeezed his eyes shut then opened them again, running his fingers through his messy hair. He nodded, then pecked Die on the lips before practically climbing into his lap to get over him and to the bathroom.

He made it to the restroom and relieved himself though it took twice as long because he kept dozing off standing there. 

Die watched Kyo go, smirking a little as he watched him wander off all sleepy and stumbly. It was one of the most adorable things he had ever seen and he knew he always wanted to see Kyo in the mornings, to always watch him like that. He made a mental note to get up first as often as possible to watch his lover in such a beautiful moment.

Kyo rinsed his hands and made his way back to his seat, clambering over Die once again and getting comfy, yawning widely. "Where're we?"

When Kyo came back, he smiled at him and reached to put his hand on the other's thigh. "Mmm... I have no idea honestly." He peered out the window. "Over water."

Kyo snorted and lightly smacked Die's arm. "No shit..." He let out a quiet laugh then shrugged, looking up at Die all squinty eyed. "Those pills worked I guess... how long was I out?"

"Six hours and twenty three minutes." Die smirked and licked his lips a little. "And do you know that when you sit up to sleep, you get wood at least three times?" he whispered into the other's ear, chuckling a little just after.

Kyo raised an eyebrow at the time, then glanced down at his crotch as if expecting to see that he was hard. He wasn't right then, of course, just having pissed, but the thought made him snort and he shook his head. "And you didn't take advantage of that?"

"Baby... you were out on meds. I'm not about to start groping you when you're out like that." Die nuzzled against him. "Though, I have to admit, if we were at home, I'd definitely have tried to wake you up and make sweet, sweet love to you." He winked.

Kyo smiled a bit then leaned up and kissed the side of Die's mouth. It was amazing to him that, despite his throat issues and bad mood, Die still managed to get him aroused. Normally, in his down swings, his cock was left largely neglected. "Sounds like a good plan to me, whenever this damn thing lands."

Die winked at him and patted his thigh. "Baby... you're on. My dick desperately needs some action today."

Kyo smirked a bit and then subtly ran his hand up Die's thigh, letting just his pinkie finger brush over his crotch lightly. "I can't wait to fuck you into our mattress... or... vice versa." Kyo grinned, letting know that he definitely wouldn't mind a good, hard fucking.

Die swept his tongue over his lips and watched Kyo's hand trail into his crotch. "You're such a tease. Two hours more to go and you do this." He chuckled softly, showing he was just amused, not actually serious.

Kyo pulled his hand away, smirking. "I love getting you worked up... especially in situations when you can't do anything about it."

"Mmm... actually a grand reason why I love you." Die smirked and reached over to rather blatantly grope at Kyo's cock. "I'll be waiting on it... and I fully expect to be jumped."

Kyo smirked then bit his lip to keep from making a lewd sound as Die groped him, his hips jerking a bit. "Oh, you will be..."

Die took his hand back into his own lap and stretched out, cracking his neck and trying to get a little less cramped up. Two hours had never ever set out to feel so long, he was certain of it.

Kyo smirked and got comfortable again, closing his eyes and thankfully starting to doze again pretty quickly though this time he did dream, not nightmares, but vulgar scenes of him and Die.

Die turned toward Kyo and watched him sleep, his eyes sliding over the other's body as he dreamed. Several different times he watched Kyo's cock get hard and then soft again. When he finally got hard the last time, Die made sure no one else was watching, finally pulling out his phone and taking a full body picture and then a close-up of the other's dick. He saved them and smirked, getting up to go to the bathroom. When he came back, he settled down quietly and watched Kyo once more, his hand running over the other's arm in a way that it wouldn't wake him up.

Kyo slept until he heard the stewardess announcing their immediate arrival in Tokyo and he finally sat up and stretched, his back popping a few times. He looked over at Die and nudged him a bit. "Hey, we're about to land... thankfully."

Die had dozed off after a while and when Kyo nudged him, he snorted awake and rubbed over his eyes. "Oh, thank god." He quickly buckled up and made sure his seat was upright, finishing off the water on his tray table, buckling that up as well, and then putting his trash in the little pocket.

Kyo situated his own seat and tray then buckled his seat belt, glancing out as the city came into focus faster and faster until the plane jerked and bumped along as it hit the runway. Finally, the stewardess welcomed them to Japan and the seatbelt light went off.

Die smirked a little as they landed. Once the seatbelt light went off and they had taxied to the gate, he took his belt off and gathered his bags. The sooner he was off the plane, the sooner he was in bed with Kyo.

Kyo grabbed up his one bag, slinging it off his shoulder and stepping out into the aisle. "So ready to be home." He smirked a little then started following the crowd out, his legs a little wobbly after sitting still for so long.

Die immediately followed after the other, watching him wobble around and smirking to himself. He leaned down and hissed out, "I really want to fuck you when you wobble around like that, baby. Something about post-sleep Kyo makes me heady with desire." He straightened up and shut his mouth, looking the perfect picture of innocence just after.

Kyo turned to say something lewd to Die, but snapped his mouth shut as a little old lady walked past them. He settled for giving Die a dirty look, his eyes glittering a bit with arousal.

They made their way through customs quickly since both had nothing to declare, having let management take care of all of that. They went to the baggage claim to await their luggage and Kyo stood against a nearby column. "Ugh, we're gonna have to get a cab or take the train..."

Die held up his phone and shook it a little in Kyo's direction. "I already have cabs waiting for all of us going in different directions. Kaoru's sharing with us to his place and then we're alone after that. "No point in wasting money."

Kyo grinned. "Glad you're on top of things." He was going to say something else, but the baggage carousel started up and he focused on looking for their stuff, waving to their road crew standing by to gather up all of their equipment.

Die moved forward, grabbing one of Kyo's bags and putting it on one of the little trolleys, smirking a bit as he grabbed one of Shinya's and passed it over to him.

Shinya took his bag with a sleepy smile, adding it to the two already on his trolley. He waved to them and took off, ready to be home with his furrier companions.

Kyo shifted around, reaching out to grab one of Kaoru's bags, going to hand it to him then shrugging and setting it on their trolley, since they would be ride sharing.

Die hauled off the large bags for both him and Kyo, snagging one of Kaoru's smaller ones and a rather odd shaped package with Toshiya written huge across the top of it, handing it to their bassist, who smirked at him and wandered off with it.

Kyo peered at the trolley then at Die. "I think that's everything... we can finally go."

Die smirked and began pushing the cart toward the exit, his eyes sparkling brightly. "B-" he stopped himself and just shook his head. He glanced at Kaoru, trailing along behind them and found that he was actually sincerely hateful toward the fact that he had to hide his and Kyo's relationship in public. Part of him just wanted to shove Kyo against the nearest wall and lay one on him really well, show the world that they were together and he loved this man more than he loved life itself. But the other part told him their career was in the balance here and he found it a difficult battle.

Kyo glanced over at Die as they walked, feeling the irritation suddenly radiating off of him. He frowned a little and stepped closer, murmuring softly. "You okay?"

Die glanced over at him and just shook his head a little. "We'll talk about it when we're alone. But... I'm not mad at you, don't worry." He lifted his hand to touch Kyo's arm in a comforting manner, but ended up stopping halfway there. Seething, he put his hand back on the cart and pushed it a little faster.

Kaoru fell back, walked a bit behind them, his eyes darting between the pair of them, seeing everything Die was doing and not doing at the same time and watching the guitarist's demeanor completely change. He pursed his lips a little and pushed his hands into his pockets, knowing he was going to have to involve himself in this 'talk'.

Kyo opened his mouth to respond, then changed his mind and snapped it shut, crossing his arms over his chest. He wasn't actually sure what had crawled up Die's ass and he found himself glancing back at Kaoru with a questioning look.

Kaoru gave Kyo a look and then eyed his pocket, quickly pulling out his own phone and sending him a text. _'Can't you see it? He's freaking out because he can't say or do what he wants to. He got used to the US, to not being known so much. And now he has to pull it back and he's frustrated.' ___He put his phone away and focused on walking again.

Die just marched straight ahead and ended up at the cab quickly, making sure it was their driver and then unloading the cart into the trunk with the driver's help, being a bit rough on his own pieces.

Kyo raised an eyebrow as Kaoru started messing with his phone, then blinked as his own vibrated in his pocket. He pulled it out and read the message, making a little 'oh' face before frowning and nodding, putting his phone back and hurrying to catch up to Die. He slipped his carry on into the trunk then nudged Die, nodding towards the car. "Pretty sure the driver's got that..."

Die sighed softly and moved toward the back doors, opening it and getting into the car, sliding over so Kyo could get into the same side and staying in the middle so Kaoru could get in as well. Once the door was shut, he let out a frustrated growl and hissed out, "I can't touch you, I can't talk to you right, nothing. I have to hide everything I feel and it hurts me. And... I'm sorry. I just need to deal with this. But it's hard, because I care so much and I've not had to hide it for over a month now."

Kaoru remained outside, smoking a cigarette, and chatting up the driver to keep him focused on him and not on the car for a bit.

Kyo settled in next to Die and bit his lip, hating the situation. He looked around, noticing that Kaoru was distracting their driver and the car's windows were tinted and he leaned forward, kissing Die hard on the mouth. "I know baby, I know... it's just... it sucks."

Die startled a little at the entire idea of Kyo kissing him like that. But a moment later, he relaxed and kissed him back. He reached to gently run his hand over Kyo's cheek and smiled a little. "It's like I'm deciding between you or the entire band's career every single time I open my mouth or move my hands." He sighed. "And it worse than sucks."

Kyo petted Die's hair and sighed softly, frowning. "Well... at least the band and crew know, so we don't have to hide in the studio or backstage as much." He didn't have much else to offer in the way of comfort. There was no way they could announce their relationship publicly. Hell, they couldn't even tell anyone about girlfriends in the past.

Die nodded a little. "I'm sorry it frustrates me this much, I didn't realize it'd hurt me like that until I couldn't. But... I guess that goes to show how much you mean to me." He glanced up as Kaoru made a huge noise trying to open the door, finally getting in and murmuring, "Stayed as long as I could. Sorry."

Kyo patted Die's knee then gave Kaoru a grateful look. "Thanks..." He settled back in between the two guitarists, sighing softly, pain building in his chest. He hated that this upset Die so much and despite knowing that it wasn't in anyway, he couldn't help but feel it was his fault.

Die tossed his bag down over his and Kyo's knees and reached for his lover's hand, squeezing it into his on hand.

Kyo smiled a little and squeezed Die's hand tightly. After a few minutes, he let out a sigh and looked out the window. "I like going overseas, but it is good to be home where I can actually understand everyone."

Die glanced over at Kyo and gave him a little smile. "It is." And it wasn't, all the same.

Soon enough they were on the way, the driver dodging between cars in a way that should have had them on edge, but somehow didn't. Kaoru was already quietly on his phone, talking business with a few people, scheduling meetings, and whatnot.

Kyo dozed a little more as they rode and it wasn't long before they were pulling up to Kaoru's place and he woke up to offer the other a wave. "See you in a couple of weeks, Kao. I'll, er... call after the doctor's appointment I guess... if I need to."

When they got to Kaoru's place, Kaoru waited on Kyo to finish his piece and then let out a little grunt. "You'd best call me, no matter what." With that, he closed the door and unloaded his luggage, slipping away into the night and they were on their way once more.

Kyo shifted over, but not much, just giving the illusion that he was moving into the proper seat at that point. He didn't bother dozing off this time as they were fairly close to their place and he was once again anxious to just be out of the vehicle.

Die had let go of Kyo's hand at one point, it being more difficult to hide it now. He waited until the cab got to their place and pulled up to the curb. He offered no explanation to the cabbie, just removing all their stuff and taking the heavier bits so there wasn't as much strain on Kyo.

Kyo gathered up what was left and went to pay the driver. He nodded to him then started for their building, letting out a sigh of exhaustion.

The moment they arrived upstairs, Die dumped all of his stuff onto the floor in the living room. Immediately, he turned to Kyo and took the things from his hands, pushing him up against the nearest wall and kissing him hard.

Kyo barely had time to get his shoes off before Die was emptying his hands and shoving him into the wall. He groaned hoarsely against the other's lips, kissing him back just as hard, his hands going to fist into his hair.

Die broke the kiss a few seconds later and took Kyo's face in his hands, gently caressing him. "I'm sorry I freaked out. Forgive me?"

Kyo smiled up at Die softly, leaning in lightly peck his lips. "Of course... always... now shut up and make me _yours_."

Die chuckled softly, reaching to pull Kyo up into his arms, carrying him off bridal style toward the bedroom. He dumped him on the bed and crawled over him, starting to strip him of his pants, tugging them down with a growl.

Kyo let out a gasp as Die hoisted him up, flailing a little at being carried in such a way. He didn't have time to think much about it though as he was soon being stripped of his pants, his hard cock exposed to the cool air and Die's gaze.

Die licked his lips and crawled up over him, eager to get on with this. He felt like he'd been waiting too long to actually have his full way with Kyo again.

Reaching down, he took off his own pants and then removed their tops as well, quickly reaching to stroke Kyo's dick a few times.

Kyo ran his hands over Die's chest, letting out a groan as his dick was touched. He pushed his hips up into the other's hand, biting his bottom lip. After a moment, he turned and nuzzled into Die's neck, licking then sucking the area near his jugular, intending on leaving a good mark now that he could.

Die chuckled a little as he released the other's cock and moved to hover over him, lightly running his finger along Kyo's crack. "God I've wanted you."

Kyo shivered slightly, spreading his legs to let Die know he was perfectly okay with where this was going. "Then what are you waiting for?" He smirked and reached down, giving Die's cock a few strokes.

Die let out a little growl and then huffed out a laugh. "I'm not waiting on anything. I'm enjoying taking my time, baby." He leaned down and nuzzled his cheek a little bit, kissing there, and then reaching for the drawer, pulling it open and grabbing the bottle of lube he knew was there.   
Kyo laughed lowly and shifted, brushing his hand through Die's hair then watching him grab the lube, a shudder of anticipation going through him. "I apologize, I'm impatient... it's just something about you."

"Mmm... the fact that I'm a sexy bitch probably helps." He laughed softly as he squirted some lube on his fingers and then went back to probing the other's entrance, finally pushing in two fingers.

Kyo snorted and nipped Die on the shoulder. "You're a cocky, sexy bitch..." He shifted as Die lubed up his fingers then let out a soft moan as he penetrated him with them. "Don't spend too much time on that."

Die thrust his fingers in and out a few times, smirking at him. "You want me just like this, baby?" He shifted a little and tucked his nose against the other's neck, breathing in the scent of his lover.

Kyo pushed his hips up, his cock twitching a little as Die fingered him. "Hng, _yes_..." He reached out and stroked his fingers through Die's hair, reaching down with his other hand to grasp and squeeze his cock.

Die grunted softly, pulling his fingers out and quickly wiping them off, going to lube up his dick. After a few moments, he shifted forward, pressing his cock against the other's entrance, slowly starting to push into his body. His face slowly contorted into a look of utter bliss as Kyo's heat engulfed him.

Kyo moaned as Die started pushing into him, moving his hands to hold onto his biceps. For all the turmoil he was going through, the look on Die's face brought him his own bliss. " _Die..._ "

"Kyo," Die breathed out, pushing into his body as fully as he could. He licked his lips a little and hunched over him, slowly starting to thrust in and out of the other's body, sliding his arms around him and hugging him close as he pushed in.

Kyo buried his face against Die's neck as he hugged him close, his hips rolling up to meet his thrusts as he moaned again, unable to keep quiet. This was like heaven to him.

Die clung to his lover, his hips rocking against Kyo's body, not really thrusting so much as moving enough to provide pleasure, just needing to be near Kyo right then, to hold him in his arms and know he loved the hell out of this man.

Kyo shifted and wrapped his legs around Die, pulling him even closer, his eyes fluttering shut as he just let himself _feel_. He placed slow kisses to his lover's neck, murmuring out sweet nothings as he held onto him.

Die slowly moved to press his face into the pillow as he thrust into his lover's body. He whimpered softly, tears slowly starting to slide down his cheeks, soaking into the pillows as he made love to Kyo. Everything was just too overwhelming for him, making him desperate to be a part of all of this with him.

Kyo was riding the wave of pleasure, clinging tightly to Die when he felt moisture on his neck. He blinked and turned his head, meeting with his lover's tear streaked face. Almost instantly, he felt a lump in his throat and he shifted so he could kiss Die's teary cheek. "Daisuke, my beautiful love..."

Die let out a soft whine, not having wanted to be found out. But he didn't seem to have a choice in the matter. He curled himself more fully around Kyo and leaned in to kiss him gently before going back to his prior position. "I love you with everything I have, Tooru.... I really honestly do," he murmured softly.

Kyo kissed Die back then tried and failed to keep his own tears from leaking down his face at the other's words, a soft sound escaping him as his chest squeezed tight. "Ah, Dai.. .I can't even describe how much I love you." He reached out and stroked Die's face gently even as their bodies moved together. "How much you've... saved me."

Die curled himself around Kyo's body, whimpering softly at the other's words. "I love you so much, baby... I love you beyond words." He could feel himself sort of a little more desperate in the needing to move department. And slowly he allowed himself that, thrusting faster and harder into the other's body, still clinging to him as if he needed him to survive.

Kyo clung to Die, groaning as his movements increased. He leaned in and placed several kisses along Die's neck, sniffling a little. It was so incredibly overwhelming for him and he was starting to feel like he was going to burst. "You are my _everything_."

Die pressed himself more fully against Kyo's body, making sure to allow Kyo's cock friction between them. He moaned at Kyo's words, pushing one hand up into the hair at the nape of Kyo's neck, holding on there as he continued to thrust. "Baby... I'm... ah-" he breathed out, his face contorting in a pleasured sort of manner.

Kyo let out a moan of pleasure as his cock was caught between them, the friction pushing him close to the edge. He shifted and started moving his hips more, his breath coming in pants. "D-Die!"

"That's right, Kyo... just like that... c'mon... oh dear god," he breathed out into the other's ear, thrusting his hips a bit faster. "I need you... I need this." He let out a little whine and pushed in, his hips stuttering a little as he started to cum, utterly and completely abruptly, his emotions dictating it completely.

Kyo's breath hitched as Die pushed into him almost frantically, hitting his prostate. It all proved too much for him and almost as soon as Die began cumming, he joined him with a cry of his own, spurting his offering out between them. "Die!"

"Kyo," Die breathed out against the other's neck, pushing in and staying there, whimpering a little as his dick flexed again, the last spurt of his cum filling the other.

Kyo shuddered and then choked up as he held onto Die, burying his face against his shoulder and damn near full out sobbing. His release was physical and emotional and the dam had been broken, there was no holding it back.

Die let out a soft sound as the other began to sob. He gently pulled out of Kyo's body, curling himself protectively around him, holding him close as he rocked them gently. "Kyo... sweetie..." he sniffed a little as he held him close, his own mind immediately dreading the worst.

Kyo held onto Die like he was drowning. In part, he was, drowning in his own emotional turmoil of the tour, his voice and things with Die. He finally managed to calm himself enough to swallow a few times and look up at Die, shaking his head and whispering, "Just... so much..."

Die nodded a little in response to Kyo's confession, leaning down to gently kiss away a few of his tears. He nuzzled under his chin a little and kissed his Adam's apple before resting his head on the other's chest. "I love you so very much and I'll be here, no matter the outcome of this. Please... keep me involved in all of it, tell me what's going on and when."

Kyo swallowed and pressed his lips to Die's forehead as the other rested against him, his hand stroking his back. "I love you and you know you'll be the first to know, baby..." He squeezed his eyes shut, grappling to get full control of himself again.

Die gave a little nod and gently shifted them onto their sides, spooning with Kyo, tucking him into his arms and holding him there. "You mean literally _everything_ to me, baby."

Kyo let himself be shifted around then laced his fingers with Die's, sniffing a little. He was quiet for a few long moments then squeezed Die's hand tightly. "I love you so much, Die."

"I love you, too... with every bit of who I am, I love you. And if I ever lost you, I don't know what I'd do." He gently kissed Kyo's shoulder. "Your appointment's tomorrow... we should get some rest and then we'll go together, okay?"

Kyo felt a few more tears leak at Die's words then he nodded, squeezing his hand again. "Yeah, that's a good idea...” He took a breath then released it finally relaxing. 

"I'll be right here, all night. I promise you that." He squeezed Kyo's hand in return and closed his eyes, hoping rest would eventually come to him and Kyo both.


	20. Chapter 20

Kyo sat next to Die on the plastic couch in the waiting room of the hospital, his hands shoved into the pocket of his hoodie to keep himself from fidgeting. With a sigh, he glanced at the clock and then to Die. "Taking fucking forever."

Die reached over to soothe Kyo, gently patting his hand on the other's leg and then taking it back, knowing he couldn't do more than that in public. "I know. They always do." He sighed, glancing around them at the other nervous people, looking up at the news on TV, something about flooding somewhere. "It's hard, I understand."

Kyo almost jerked from Die's touch, feeling particularly twitchy and uncomfortable. He hated hospitals and doctors' offices. The smell of antiseptic and illness everywhere made him sick to his stomach. "What's taking so long? I should have just let management arrange something..."

Die winced at the way Kyo jerked when he touched him. He looked away, trying to fight off that feeling of anger over not being able to do what he wanted with Kyo in public again. After a moment, he quelled it once more, and shrugged. "Maybe that chick with the severed finger. Just a guess."

Kyo huffed slightly and stood up, going back to a long forgotten habit and patting his pockets for cigarettes before stopping and looking pissed off at himself. He was about to stalk off when a nasal voice rang out over the room, calling his name. "Finally," he muttered, turning to look at Die. He hesitated a long moment before nodding his head towards the waiting nurse and starting to walk that way.

Die watched him get up, some amount of regret in his eyes. He waited for Kyo to make some kind of inclination. When he finally did, he pushed himself into an upright position and took a deep breath, following after Kyo.

The nurse did all of the preliminaries then lead them into an exam room, telling them that a technician would be in momentarily to take Kyo back for x-rays. She departed with a slight bow then shut the door, leaving them waiting once again.

Kyo moved to sit in a chair and crossed his arms "It stinks in here," he muttered, sounding for all the world like a petulant child.

Die just quietly followed from room-to-room, nervously pulling at his pants pockets the entire time. He was worried about many things. What was wrong with Kyo? Would someone know why they were there together? What happened if they got the bomb dropped on them right then, right there? Worse, what if they had no answers? He looked up when Kyo mentioned the smell and shrugged. "Didn't notice."

Kyo finally looked up at Die and raised an eyebrow. Die's attitude was odd and he couldn't really put his finger on it. It went beyond worry for his health, he felt but didn't know what else it could be.

Frowning, he stood up and placed his hand on Die's shoulder, sighing softly. "I'm sorry. You can leave if you need to... I promise I won't be angry."

Die shook his head. "No... I want to stay... I need to." He bowed his head a little and fought back the lump in his throat. "This is everything... it's the make or break of our careers, of you being able to keep talking. I will not leave, no matter what." And he meant that in many more ways than Kyo could have possibly imagined. "Never."

Kyo listened to Die speak, his teeth gritting together painfully tight, the reality of the situation sort of sinking in. "Die..." He couldn't say anything more, partly because he was choking on his own emotions and partly because there was a knock at the door and then a man in blue scrubs stepped in, asking him to follow him to x-ray.

Kyo nodded and glanced at Die again before moving to follow the tech, nervousness bubbling in his stomach. What if this _was_ the end of his career? What would become of him? He didn't want to imagine the devastation, though it stayed at the edges of his mind as he went through the x-rays.

Die watched Kyo leave, knowing he wasn't allowed in that room. The moment the other was gone, he collapsed in the horrible yellow plastic chair, his face in his hands. Everything hurt: his heart, his soul, his mind, gods even his chest hurt. His hands shook and his breathing came in shallow gasps. After a while he realized what was happening, something that hadn't in years. He pushed himself up from the chair and went to the door, opening it and calling out to a passing nurse. She came rushing to him and he did his best to tell her he was just there for someone else and he was sure he was having a panic attack. She took him back inside and put him on the seat again, rushing back out to get a doctor.

Within two minutes, Die had the pill dissolving under his tongue and a fresh prescription for the pills in his hand. He leaned back against the wall of the now-empty room, his eyes closed as the world seemed to swirl around him. Everything was sort of fuzzy and he hated it. It was why he'd stopped taking the pills to start with. But he supposed with the current goings on, this was how it was going to be.

Kyo tried to be civil as the two technicians shifted him around and such, taking what felt like a million pictures of his throat then informing him that they were going to stick a camera down his throat. He complied with them, having no choice in the matter.

When they were finally done, twenty minutes had passed and he was lead back to his room feeling weary and grumpier than ever. His weariness increased when he saw the state of his lover. "Die...?"

Die opened his eyes when Kyo came back in the room, attempting to look and feel like himself. But the truth was, he hadn't had long enough to get the drugs through his system yet and he was having a hard time focusing. He blinked a few more times and finally managed to focus enough to speak. "Hey... how'd it go?"

Kyo grunted and moved into the room, pushing the door shut with his foot before flopping down on the ugly grey exam table. "Fantastic. Now what happened t-," the words died in his throat as he came to a realization, "you had a panic attack, didn't you?" He frowned, a look of guilt washing over his face.

Die looked up at him, his eyes a little unfocused for a moment. He shook his head to clear it and then gave Kyo a very confused look. "You... you know?" He didn't know anyone on the band had even known he used to have them. When he did, he'd lock himself away from everyone, not come back for a while, and then claim something stupid. Like that he'd gone to get beer or fucked a girl; whatever came to mind. But the thought that someone - Kyo of all of them - had noticed and then understood, was somehow a huge deal. He was certain it'd be a bigger deal later, when he could think for himself again.

Kyo sighed softly and reached out, patting Die's arm. "Always have. Your eyes look like a deer caught in the headlights." He pulled his hand back and brought his knees up to his chest, hugging them and biting his lip. He was uncomfortable in so many ways and he was beginning to regret letting Die come with him.

Die blinked a little and then sighed. "I had no idea anyone knew except me." He leaned back against the wall again, closing his eyes because it was easier to focus that way. "Give me fifteen and I'll be fine, I promise."

Kyo shrugged. "I was dealing with my own shit at the time, so I never said anything, figured you had it handled... as selfish as that sounds." He frowned a bit then rested his head on his knees. "I want to leave."

Die nodded a little. It made sense, it really did. "I did... or rather the pills did. It's been friggin years since I've had one." He frowned a little, opening his eyes and peering up at Kyo. "I'm sorry... I've made all of this harder on you. I didn't mean to."

Kyo turned to look at Die again and shook his head. "Don't be... it gives me something else to focus on instead of the fact that my voice sounds like I shoved a railroad spike down my throat."

Die swallowed, leaning forward and putting his elbows on his knees. "Did they say how long it would be?" He felt a little more with it, his brain defogging just the slightest bit.

Kyo snorted and rolled his eyes. "They said it could be up to thirty minutes while the doctor studied the films."

"Ah..." Die took in a deep breath and then sighed, rubbing his eyes and then standing up, feeling less wobbly now. He tucked his prescription into his pocket and leaned on the counter, looking ashamed. "Please understand... I really am sorry this happened." In a way, he felt like he'd taken the focus from Kyo and how much of a huge deal Kyo's tests and results were by having his own problems. It just wasn't right.

Kyo bit his lip and scooted off the table, moving over to Die and slipping his arms around his waist. "Stop it. It isn't your fault Die."

Die reached out for him, pulling him close, leaning down and kissing the top of his head. "I love you... more than I could ever describe."

Kyo leaned into Die, relishing the warm contact in the cold, sterile environment of the exam room. "I love you, too, so much." He sighed and nuzzled into Die's chest, staying there until another knock on the door sounded and he stepped away with a frown.

Die almost didn't want to let Kyo go when the knock came. In the end, he did, relinquishing his hold with a soft sigh. When the doctor stepped in, Die immediately stuffed his hands into his pockets and ducked his head. It was the same one who'd come to his aide.

"Mr. Andou?" the doctor questioned, putting his hand on Die's shoulder for a moment. "How are you feeling?"

Die shrugged a little. "I'm fine. Thank you."

With a nod, the doctor looked up at Kyo. "Okay... so... we're looking at a number of things with you here, young man."

Die wanted to snort, realizing that Kyo was a young man in comparison to the age of the doctor in front of them. The man was at least seventy if not eighty years old.

Kyo stared at the doctor, immediately feeling like a little kid there for his shots. He coughed and ran a hand through his hair, sighing slightly. "Like what?"

The doctor shifted slightly and came to stand closer to Kyo, leaving Die hanging out behind him against the counter. "First and foremost, you have a lot of scar tissue. I'm sure that helps with the irritation, but it's not the full cause." He took out a paper and handed it over to Kyo. "You have polyps in your throat. Are you familiar with what those are?"

Kyo resisted the urge to back away as the doctor came nearer, a frown on his face as he was told he had scar tissue. "I... see." He took the paper and looked at it, his expression nearly horrified as he stared at the images on it. "I am to a point..." he flicked his eyes to Die and then back to the doctor, taking a breath. "What... does this mean?"

The doctor waited on Kyo to respond before nodding. "Basically you have two options. One, you live with it and one day you'll be up there on stage and your voice is just going to... break. And judging by the pain you were describing, you're very close to that point right now." He waited for it to sink in for a moment.

Die quietly pushed away from the counter, coming to stand behind Kyo, putting his arms around him, defiant of the fact that he was showing he was with him in such a way. "And the other option? Because that isn't one."

The doctor didn't look bothered by Die's movements or his tone, he just nodded. "The other is much more sensible and I would hope you'd take my advice and go this route. You plan the surgery. You have them removed and go through vocal therapy to get your voice back. There's some risk, of course, as with anything. But some vocalists get through this. Are you familiar with Adele? She just had this done in the USA and she came out in tip-top shape."

Kyo stared at the doctor as he basically told him he almost fucked his career permanently, his hand balling into a fist, only relaxing once Die's arms slid around him. As he listened to the next option, he swallowed a few times, a shiver of slight panic going through him at the thought.

At the mention of the other singer, he licked his lips and nodded, vaguely remember hearing something about it. "What if... the surgery... doesn't work?"

"Now I don't want you focusing on that possibility. It's less than a one percent chance. But if it did happen, you'd be in the same boat you would be if you didn't go through with it at all." He pulled out another paper and handed it over. "Here are the surgeons I recommend for this. And I've also included a few top-end doctors if you want a second opinion. It's... big. I understand that completely. But I do suggest you not keep it waiting. The sooner the better on this."

Die tightened his hold on Kyo, trying to keep up a strong face even though he felt like jelly inside. It was like his worst nightmare coming true right in front of him and he couldn't even begin to understand how this was probably feeling to Kyo right then.

Kyo had gone practically numb, the doctor's words barely registering as the thought of surgery and how bad this truly was reverberated around his head. Die's arms around him kept him barely grounded, but it took him a couple of minutes to answer. "We... have a tour planned for this spring."

The doctor shook his head. "My advice to you is to cancel it. Think about the long run and go from there. Short term... the fans will forgive you." The doctor reached out and handed Die a copy of both documents as well, looking between them. He added quietly, "I'd suggest the pair of you keep your... closeness at the forefront of your minds through this. Friendship... love... whatever, it's what keeps things sane in the end."

Die tugged Kyo back against his chest more fully, squaring his shoulders. "We can do this," he replied, a certain strength in his voice that hadn't been there a moment before. "We will. Whatever the outcome."

Kyo thought about canceling the tour, the paperwork involved, the mess Kaoru and management would have to go through, not to mention the guilt of disappointing their fans. He felt sick, a cold sweat breaking on his forehead, and if it weren't for Die holding him, he doubted he'd be able to stand.

Rather than helping, the doctor's words about their relationship only made him feel worse, even Die's resolve barely helping him any. He could feel himself shutting down, sinking into his own mind until he was simply nodding at whatever was being said to him.

The doctor gave Die a look that said more than a thousand words would have, his gaze flicking back down to Kyo. After a moment, he simply left the room, letting them know they were free to go.

Die immediately moved, coming around in front of Kyo and taking his face in both hands. "Baby... look at me. Focus on me. We _can_ do this. I promise. We'll get you a second opinion and then we'll do what we have to. Okay?"

Kyo blinked slowly and stared at Die, his lips set in a grim line. "What if it doesn't work, Die? What if this is the end?" He couldn't find the light at the end of the tunnel, all he could see was darkness and it was threatening to consume him. His voice was the only thing he had to contribute to this world, the only thing that kept him _sane_.

Die leaned in and kissed him hard before he pulled back and gave him the most defiant look he'd held in many years. "Fuck that. Fuck it not working. It will!" He slid his arms around Kyo and pulled him hard against him. "It's just going to be a rough ride. But worth it in the end, I promise."

Kyo stared at Die, taking in the other's defiant expression. "Die..." He sighed and let himself be pulled against the other, his hands resting on his arms. He wanted to both stay here like this and let Die comfort him and he wanted to run, get away from all of it.

Die hugged him tight for quite a while, finally pulling back. "I won't let you not do this. We have the insurance to cover it. There's no reason not to."

Kyo looked up at Die then away, staring at the overly sterile exam room and thinking of an operating room and doctors cutting open his very livelihood. He swallowed then just nodded, moving to pick up the documents then turning to open the door as his heart started thumping hard in his chest. "Need to get out."

Die let him go, following him out. As they were leaving a nurse pushed a script into Kyo's hand, telling him it was for the pain if he needed it. There was also a paper of additional care instructions for the meantime.

Kyo took the script with a nod then, without really waiting for Die, made his way outside and into the cool air, taking a breath, trying to keep himself together until they were in private.

Die followed after him, being as careful as possible to not say or do anything that would make the other upset in any way. He hailed a cab, not wanting to deal with the subway on the way back. Once they were inside, he gave directions to their place and just sat there, holding the papers, feeling stupid.

Kyo went through the motions, getting into the cab and buckling up before turning to stare out the window. Once they were on their way he huffed out a sigh and looked up at Die, growing more and more uncomfortable with the thought of surgery.

The taxi seemed to take forever to get to their place. When it finally arrived, Die paid and got out of the cab, heading inside as quickly as possible, making sure Kyo was with him the whole way. He could only guess what the reaction might have been and he didn't want to chance it.

Kyo's mind spiraled further as the rode in silence to their place, the cab feeling cramped and claustrophobic. When they got home, he allowed Die to lead him up to their apartment. It was only then that he sort of sagged and collapsed to his knees there in the middle of the floor.

Die was right behind Kyo and the moment the other collapsed, Die just slammed the door and dropped to his knees, tossing everything else aside in favor of pulling Kyo into his arms and holding him close. He didn't know what to say or do, but this part felt right.

Kyo let himself become completely overwhelmed with the emotions that were choking him, fogging his mind and tearing at his heart. As Die enveloped him in an embrace he finally broke, letting out a keening cry of frustration, pain and anger.

Die held him, but not tight enough to limit his movements. He felt at a loss, knowing this was a huge burden for Kyo and that it probably felt like the end of the world to him. But honestly, he didn't know what to do or how to react this time. With one hand, he pulled out his phone and texted Kaoru. _Emergency, please come to the house. Bad news on Kyo front._

After several minutes, Kyo calmed himself enough to just lean against Die, his eyes blankly staring. He couldn't bring himself to speak or anything, just shivering occasionally. He knew this was not something Die needed to see or deal with or anything right then, but try as he might, he couldn't get out of it long enough to lock himself away.

Die curled himself around Kyo in a protective sort of manner. He wasn't about to let him out of his sight, not a chance in hell. He took to gently rocking them back and forth, just waiting on Kaoru to show up, not really knowing how to deal with Kyo right then, but knowing going this alone wasn't the right option.

Kyo closed his eyes, taking in short breaths as the vortex of thoughts and emotions swirled in his mind. He shifted in Die's arms, clinging to him like a life jacket as he faintly croaked out. "I'm drowning."

Die hugged Kyo closer to himself and reached to run his hand through Kyo's hair. "You won't drown with me beside you. No matter what happens, I'm standing by you fully. I just need you to remember that for me, okay?"

No sooner had he finished saying that than the door opened. A rather frazzled looking Kaoru stepped inside, shutting it firmly behind him and taking in the situation with a single sweeping glance. He moved to kneel in front of Kyo, reaching out his hand to gently touch his cheek. He didn't say anything, just watching him.

Kyo shook his head in response to Die's statement, feeling like nothing could help and he was going to drag the others, all of them, down with him. The arrival of Kaoru only brought a fresh wave of panic and his eyes snapped open to look at the band leader. "I'm sorry," he breathed out, chin trembling slightly.

Kaoru shook his head. "No need." He leaned in and pressed his lips to Kyo's ear, whispering, "Whatever this is, we'll still have one another." He pulled back and glanced at the papers on the floor with a questioning look.

Die nodded toward the papers and made sure to hang onto Kyo well enough to keep him from bolting off. He gently nuzzled against the side of his neck and just stayed there.

Kyo's hand reached out slightly to grasp Kaoru's shirt, almost trying to keep him from seeing the damage done to his throat. He couldn't stop him though, especially with the way Die was holding him and so he just gave up and hung his head, feeling rather worthless. After all, what good is a prophet without a voice?

Kaoru picked up the papers and sat back, looking through them. He carefully placed them aside once he was done and gave Die a rather tense look before he got to his feet. "May I use your computer?"

Die nodded. "It's sitting on the coffee table. Password is uh... well it's English. K-Y-O-I-S-M-y-L-|-F-e." He blushed a little and Kaoru gave him a small smile before departing the room.

Kyo barely heard what they were saying, focusing on something else that was arising... something he could actually take care of. He went to stand up, struggling a little to get out of Die's arms.

Die latched on to Kyo the moment that he tried to stand up. "Baby?" he asked softly, worry thick in his voice. He stood up as well, still holding onto Kyo. He was truly terrified to let him go right then.

Kyo let out a pathetic whine and huffed. "Gotta use the bathroom." He squirmed a little, his hand going to Die's arm, patting it a little in an attempt to gain brief freedom.

Die's mouth formed a little 'o' and he let him go, though he followed after him, determined to keep his promise to himself at least for a few days. Until they had a plan and Kyo felt better about said plan.

Kyo went into the bathroom, not bothering to shut the door because he figured Die would follow him anyway. He moved to the toilet and unzipped his pants, leaning over and starting to relieve himself, legs actually twitching a little with how weak he felt.

Die slipped into the bathroom behind Kyo, leaning against the counter and for a moment, watching him. After a few seconds it struck him that he was outright staring at Kyo while he was so distraught. Shame washed over him and he looked away, pulling out his lip balm and applying some to his lips to busy himself while the other was using the bathroom.

Kyo finished, then stood there wobbling for a moment before simply sinking to his knees and hunching over the bowl, doing what his stomach had been threatening to do since the doctor's office. He groaned as he retched, the feeling pure agony on his already raw throat, further irritating it. He stayed there for a moment, waiting to see if more would come, his stomach still wishy-washy.

Die winced a moment later, closing his eyes to get a grip on himself before he steeled his stomach against what was happening to Kyo. He knelt down behind him and tucked his hair behind his ears before reaching down and gently tucking him back in and doing up his pants. One hand slid up under his shirt, gently rubbing at his stomach while he waited on Kyo to finish.

Kaoru came at the sound of Kyo throwing up, pausing in the doorway and kindly looking away until Die had Kyo decent again. He looked back then, a certain amount of sadness in his eyes. After a moment, he retreated to the living room once more, knowing Die had it covered.

Somewhere, deep inside his mind, Kyo almost found it comical that Die was the one symbolically holding his hair instead of the other way around. He leaned forward and vomited once more before flushing the toilet and shifting to sit on the lid. He looked at Die with a “shoot me now” look on his face before standing up and bending over the sink to rinse his mouth out. Finally, he straightened and ran his wet hands over his face and through his hair then gestured to the door.

Die stayed with Kyo through it all. When he went to wash his mouth out, Die stood up and waited against the wall. At Kyo gesturing for them to leave the room, he just nodded and waited on Kyo to go first, his hand lightly on the other's back, rubbing there. No chances.

Kyo could tell with the way Die was treating him that he knew him too well. He sighed and walked into the living room, glancing at Kaoru then moving to curl himself up on the couch, peering at the leader with a knowing look, pain and guilt present in his eyes.

Die followed after him and settled down beside him, quietly watching what Kaoru was searching on the internet. He gave a little smile. Of course it was how things could go with the issues Kyo had. He reached to gently touch Kyo's leg. He knew what he needed right then, but he was almost afraid to give it to him. After a moment, he stood up again. "Kyo, will you come with me to the bedroom for a few minutes? I need to talk to you about something."

Kyo turned and looked at Die then to Kaoru before nodding and standing up, starting to head for their bedroom, vaguely confused as to why Die didn't just talk to him when they were in the bathroom.

Die made sure they both made it into the bedroom and closed the door. He gestured to the bed. "Lay down for me?" He moved around the room, quickly turning on a small light, and then getting what he thought he'd need in a minute.

Kyo stared at Die like he'd grown another head but moved to lay down on the bed. "Die... what...?"

Die came and sat down on the side of the bed next to him, a sad sort of look in his eyes. After a moment, he bit the proverbial bullet and held out his hand, showing him the razor blade he held in it. "Is this what you need right now, Kyo?"

Kyo looked up as Die sat down, frowning at the look in his eyes. It pained him to know that he'd caused it... and he was sure he had some way or another. When the other revealed the razor blade, his mouth went dry and he licked his lips a couple of times as he stared at the glinting metal. His mind immediately went to the sweet feeling of release that he knew slicing into his own skin would give him and he was nodding before he could stop himself.

Die nodded a little and shifted closer. He placed the blade safely out of Kyo's reach on his own thigh, and reached out, pushing up Kyo's shirt. His fingers lightly traced the skin that was about to be marred, an odd sort of feeling coming over him as he made up his mind. He swallowed thickly, picking it up and then exposed his own arm, drawing the blade over it to see the depth he should be using, a soft cry leaving his lips at the stinging pain. He watched as his own blood welled up and slid down his arm and a moment later, he grabbed a tissue and pressed it over the wound.

Kyo watched Die, almost wanting to yell at him for being so damn cautious. He skin jumped when his shirt was pulled up, muscles twitching beneath the skin in anticipation. Die's next move shocked him slightly, not having expected him to cut his own skin. "Die...." He sighed softly, then bit his lip, frowning. In any other situation, that might have aroused him, but now, it just served to bring him more guilt. 

Die then shifted his body to lie beside Kyo, sliding his hand down and with even greater difficulty, made one line across Kyo's side.

Kyo stilled as Die moved towards him with the blade, anticipation welling up within him only to be released with sting of pain as the blade sliced through his skin. He whimpered softly, his hands clutching the bed covers. 

Die settled close to him, repeating the action a few more times, making six neat little lines across Kyo's skin. His fingers brushed over the area, smearing the blood around and then pushed his face against Kyo's shoulder, whispering out, "Is that... enough?"

Kyo was breathless by the time Die was done with the last line. He shuddered and reached up, brushing his hand through Die's hair as he felt tears in the corners of his eyes. At the question, he swallowed and didn't say anything, simply reaching down to grab Die's hand, pushing it down further and then pressing hard, letting the blade cut deepest there, bringing one last sweep of endorphins rushing through him. No, it wasn't enough but it would have to do for now. "It's fine, thank you."

Die gasped a little as Kyo pushed his hand down more. Shock filtered over him that his own hand had caused such a deep wound on the other's body. He swallowed a bit and when Kyo let his hand go, he moved it back and put the blade out of reach. He kissed against his shoulder and then sighed softly. "I love you." The unspoken part was that he loved him enough to do this, despite any misgivings about it.

Kyo reached out and grasped Die's hand, holding it tightly for a moment. "I love you, so much."

Die shifted slightly and pushed himself into an upright position. "Let's get this cleaned up and go back to Kaoru, okay?" He squeezed Kyo's hand and picked up the razor blade, knowing better than to leave it. "Promise me you'll come to me when you need this. Let me regulate it for you... at least until this is all over, okay? I need it for my sanity."

Kyo lay on the bed shivering slightly as he watched Die sit up and take the blade, a vague look of resignation in his eyes. He sat up with a wince and licked his lips, glancing down at the bleeding cuts in his skin, then back to Die, frowning a little at his words. Another feeling of guilt settled over him as he realized how badly this must be affecting his lover. "Okay... promise."

Die looked him in the eyes as Kyo answered, nodding and then fully standing up. He reached out his free hand. "C'mon, we need to get back to Kaoru. I'm sure he has a few things he'd like to say." He pulled his lover into his arms and kissed him gently on the tip of his nose.

Kyo let Die pull him up, wrinkling his nose as it was kissed. He stayed there for a moment, letting Die hold him before he moved to the dresser, pulling out a couple of Band-Aids and sterile wipes. He quickly took care of the scratches and bandaged up the deepest ones then pulled on his shirt. "Okay, let's go see what Kaoru has to say about this..."

Die stood next to him the whole time and then finally reached to get a wipe for his own cut. He doctored it up and then tossed the wipe, moving to pull his sleeve back down. A moment later, he wrapped up the blade in a tissue and waited until Kyo wasn't looking to tuck it into a drawer. Not that he thought that'd stop the other if he wanted to do something without Die around.

Kyo puffed his cheeks up and let out a breath before opening the bedroom door and heading out to the living room to curl himself up in a ball on one of the chairs, peering at Kaoru with a look of trepidation. He was not eager to hear what their leader had to say and was feeling slightly ill again.

Kaoru looked up when Die and Kyo came back into the room. He quietly set aside the laptop and leaned forward, offering a piece of paper to Kyo. "I have a second opinion appointment set up for you. It's my personal doctor, who happens to double as a throat specialist."

Die sat down next to Kyo and curled his arm around the other man's shoulders, holding him close.

Kyo took the paper and looked at it, an address, name and time written on it. He nodded then licked his lips, flailing his hand a little as he tried to put into words what he wanted to say. "What if... this..." he couldn't bring himself to even say it, his jaw clenching tightly instead.

Kaoru took a deep breath and reached to touch Kyo's leg, holding his knee tightly. "Don't. It won't do any good to jump to conclusions. Not for you or any of us. For now, we deal with this one day at a time. We're canceling the US tour, no matter what. It's just not plausible right now. No matter what, you have to recover. Beyond that, time will tell and that's that."

Die nodded a little, squeezing Kyo's shoulder. "He's right. We just have to stick it out and believe in the best unless proven otherwise."

Kyo sighed softly, a thought going to the disappointed fans. He looked between Kaoru and Die and nodded. "I'm sorry for the trouble..."

Immediately both guitarists started shaking their heads. Die murmured, "It's not like you wanted this." And Kaoru chimed in, "Yeah, you didn't do it on purpose."

Kyo raised an eyebrow then shrugged. "I could have been more careful, paid more attention." He lifted his hand to run fingers through his hair slightly agitatedly. After a moment, he stood up and went into the kitchen, suddenly thirsty.

Die had to grip the seat in order to not follow him, nervous beyond what he should have been for Kyo leaving the room. He bowed his head a little, looking much paler than usual.

Kaoru stood up instead, touching Die's shoulder on the way past in an understanding sort of way. He followed Kyo into the kitchen and leaned on the counter. "Think you have a beer or something in there you could spare?"

The vocalist sort of jumped when Kaoru spoke. He'd been staring out of the small window above their sink instead of getting a drink. He nodded and moved to the fridge, getting two beers and a Vitamin water for himself. When he handed over the beer, he peered at Kaoru, licking his lips. "You're awfully calm..."

Kaoru accepted the beer and used his keys to open the top of it. He tossed the top on the counter and took a sip, shrugging slightly. "There's little point to freaking out. What's happening is happening, and we're going to get through it in some way or other. That's just how it is."

Kyo looked at Kaoru for another moment then shrugged. "I guess so..." He let out another sigh, reaching out to scratch Snowball's ears as she jumped on the counter and mewed at him. "I just hope I can keep it together enough for Die's sake."

Kaoru shifted closer, placing a hand on Kyo's lower back. "You realize I'm always here for you as well, right? If you don't want to burden him with something, but you need help, just call me. But... trust me on this one... Die wants and needs to be here for you right now. He's been like that since long before you two got together and I imagine he needs you to need him right now."

Kyo nodded then reached out and patted Kaoru's arm. "Thanks... I'll try. You know I'm used to folding within myself." 

Kaoru nodded a little. "I know... but at least keep trying to let him in."

Kyo gave a nod then picked up his water and Die's beer, walking back to the living room and settling next to his lover, leaning against his side. "I love you." Kaoru followed him back out of the kitchen, settling across from them.

Die looked up when Kyo came back in, accepting his beer with a quiet, "Thanks," opening it and slipping his arm around Kyo again. "I love you, too." He smiled, looking a little less lost, even at just such a small gesture as words.

Kyo silently found Die's hand and laced their fingers together, squeezing tightly. "So... Kao. Er... how're things?" He coughed and forced a small smile onto his face.

Kaoru gave him a soft smile. "On my end? Things... are going nicely. I'm glad you two forced me out of my shell. I think things are progressing nicely, though, admittedly, slowly." He looked a little embarrassed. "My fault on that one."

Die snuggled closer to Kyo, sipping on his beer, while he listened to Kaoru speak. He chuckled a little. "You really are taking it slow from what I saw."

Kyo, thankful to have the focus off of him now, nodded. "Sometimes that's the way you have to go. It's easier to take your time than to force it." He licked his lips and glanced up at Die.

"And then there's taking too much time," Die offered wisely, looking at Kyo and blushing a little. "Like we took for-fucking-ever to get together."

Kaoru chuckled a little and took a sip of his beer. "You make a good point. But I don't think we're at that point just yet."

Kyo laughed softly and nodded. "I think you two are progressing nicely, considering." He reached over and patted Kaoru's knee.

Kaoru shifted a little and then made a little uncomfortable face. "I meant to ask you... I know it's personal... and really fucking weird for me to be asking, but where do you get your supplies from?"

Die arched his eyebrow a little, letting Kyo field this one, feeling he'd be far too sarcastic about it.

Kyo coughed to cover up a snort because the question threw him off guard. He studied Kaoru for a moment. "It depends, really. Sometimes we find things in the shop nearby. Otherwise we order off of online."

Kaoru flushed slightly, ducking his head. "How... how do you know who's going to... you know... uh," he looked really uncomfortable, "put it in."

Kyo stared at Kaoru then looked up at Die before clearing his throat, again. "Well... we trade off, but that doesn't work with all couples. The best thing you can do, Kao, is to ask Toshiya what he wants."

Kaoru looked a little uncomfortable and shifted, scratching his arm and then taking a drink again. "And please... how the hell would someone even bring that up?"

Die chuckled a little and nudged Kyo. "Yeah... how would you bring it up, baby?"

Kyo peered at Kaoru, humming softly. "Just spit it out. There is no right or wrong time," he offered the other a small smile.

Kaoru nodded a little. "Er... easier said than done, but okay."

Die held up a finger. "Make sure you bring it up before you get into the bed, okay?"

Kyo smiled up at Die, patting his leg. "Toshiya's likely to get antsy though... so don't take too long."

Kaoru shifted again and coughed, looking away. "You know... I'm driving myself nuts, too."

Kyo laughed and stretched. "Just go slow, but no pressure..." He shrugged and offered them a lopsided grin, feeling slightly more... human.

The rest of the night was spent with the three of them conversing on random topics, every once in a while someone getting more than a little embarrassed by something, and then the topic being changed.

By the end of the night, Die was curled up next to Kyo, his arm around the vocalist, sound asleep. Kaoru left shortly after the guitarist fell asleep, bidding them a good night and slipping out.


	21. Chapter 21

Kyo had spent the better part of the day brooding silently with his notebook. Die had run out to get groceries and he'd decided to stay home, claiming he didn't feel good. Who could blame him though? He was due to have surgery on his throat in a week's time. He sighed and reached up to rub his temples, looking around the apartment and realizing that it had gotten kind of late. With a frown, he picked up his phone and shot a text off to Die. _"It's late, you okay?"_

Die hadn't felt so great about leaving Kyo alone to go out and get groceries, but the truth was miso and rice only lasted for so many meals before you didn't want it anymore. So he'd gone, reluctantly, and made his way to the store, getting everything on the list. He'd tried to be as fast as possible, but since they'd needed so much, he'd had to take his car, and now he was stuck in traffic on the way home.

When his phone alerted him to a text, he pulled it out and opened the message, quickly scanning over it. He frowned a little and glanced up to make sure they still weren't moving. _"Stuck in traffic, sorry. I'm about three blocks away. Dead stop. Are you okay?"_

Kyo had dozed off slightly while waiting for Die to respond and awoke with a start when his phone vibrated in his lap. He grunted and picked it up, reading the message as he made his way to the bathroom. He winced a little in sympathy with Die's current predicament. _"That sucks. I'm sorry, baby. I'm fine, gonna have a shower."_ He sent the message and quickly got himself undressed, setting his phone on the counter, and turning to climb into the shower.

Die read the reply message and huffed a little bit, unhappy he couldn't be there with Kyo right then. He sent back a quick message _"Love you."_ and then put his phone down, focusing on the road again. It was another ten minutes before traffic moved at all, and then it finally started its slow crawl forward.

Kyo took extra time in the shower, deciding to shave and neaten up certain areas. When he finally got out, he felt somewhat better. Looking in the mirror, he noticed he was rather scruffy on his face too and took care of that as well as brushing his teeth, wrinkling his nose at the thought that he'd been neglecting himself a bit lately. "Poor Die... talk about morning breath."

He snorted and moved into the bedroom to get dressed then pulled a small dark red velvet box from his travel bag, stuffing it in his pocket for the moment. He'd been debating on when to give that particular gift to Die and had decided that before his surgery was best... just in case. He headed into the living room to wait for Die, finding himself nervously tapping his fingers.

Die finally arrived home about forty minutes later. He gathered up all the bags and made his way up the stairs rather than the elevator, thinking it best to get his exercise when he could. By the time he got to their floor, he was breathing hard and his shirt felt a bit sticky from sweat. He made a face as he slipped into the apartment and went straight for the kitchen, plunking the bags on the counter.

Kyo jumped a bit when the door opened and Die came in, looking a bit winded and sweaty. He raised an eyebrow, but stood up and followed him into the kitchen, slipping his arms around his lover's waist. "Did you take the stairs?"

Die let out a surprised sound as he was touched by Kyo. He immediately noticed Kyo was clean and he was sweaty and he sort of freaked out on the inside. "Yeah. I'm sweaty!" He shifted a little to try to get back from him and not make him all gross as well, quickly putting away the things that would ruin if he didn't. "Need fans in that stairwell, I tell you."

Kyo blinked a bit, feeling a sense of rejection as Die wiggled away from him. He bit his lip then shrugged, clearing his throat and starting to put the dry goods away. "Ah...yeah."

Die glanced back at him and frowned a little. "I'm sorry... it's just... you're clean and I'm not. I'm a mess." He quickly shoved the last few groceries away and then gently patted Kyo's arm as he slipped past. "I'll clean up real fast and then I'll hug you properly, yeah?"

Kyo turned and looked at Die, his cheeks flushing a little at having been so easily read. He ran a hand through his still slightly damp hair and nodded. "Okay... I'll be here." He stood there for a moment feeling a bit foolish. It seemed his emotions were all over the damn place lately.

Die quickly went into the bathroom and wet a rag with warm water. He pulled off his shirt and quickly unfastened his pants. First, he washed his entire upper body and then rinsed the rag, quickly wiping down all the important bits downstairs as well. He took a quick piss and then fastened up his pants, tossing the rag away, and came back out, going to the bedroom for a new shirt.

Kyo had had enough time to make himself a cup of tea and had moved back into the living room to curl up on the couch, sipping it slowly as he stared at the wall, thinking of nothing and everything at the same time.

Die came back out as he pulled a black tank top over his head, pushing his hair back from his face and smoothing it down. He headed over to the couch, settling down next to Kyo and putting a hand on his thigh. "Okay, now I'm not gross." He leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. "Sorry, but you know how I am about my sweat."

Kyo glanced up and set his tea down on the coffee table as Die came back and sat next to him. He offered him a smile and small chuckle, nodding his head. "Yeah, I know, but you know I don't care." He leaned into the other's touch, sighing softly.

"I got too icky and couldn't take it myself." Die slid his arm around the other's waist and gave him a sheepish look. "So... it's obvious you took a shower, but what else did you do?"

The vocalist shrugged and reached up, running his hand over his newly shaved jaw. "I shaved... that's about it though." He looked a little guilty, knowing that their apartment had really needed picking up and that Die had been doing the brunt of that lately.

Die gave him a soft smile and reached out to run a hand over his cheek. "I'm glad. A little chin fuzz is one thing, but a full beard doesn't suit you well." He chuckled, leaning back and stretching. "Any plans? Or did I just complete them with the store run?"

Kyo leaned into Die's hand then shrugged a little. "Something other than... what I've been doing, but nothing specific... except-" he hesitated; unsure of how Die would take the gift he'd gotten him. "Except... well... while we were in the US, I did a little shopping one day while you were still asleep and...." He pulled out the little red box and handed it to Die, shrugging. "It just... suited you."

Die blinked when Kyo held out a little box to him. His eyes flicked up to Kyo's and then back to the box a few times before he took it from him and shifted forward on the seat to open it. Inside he found a silver ring with a little red stone in the top. His breath caught in his throat and he found himself truly choked up. Maybe he was reading too much into it. Maybe he wasn't. But he had to know.

He pulled it out of the box and lifted his gaze to Kyo's, swallowing thickly as he held it out to him. "Put it on me?" he asked quietly, not wanting to make a mistake and look stupid, but hoping so hard it was what he thought it might be.

Kyo's heart thumped as Die opened the ring, nervousness making him feel slightly ill. The look on his lover's face told him all he needed to know though and he almost sobbed with relief. When Die held out the ring and asked him to put it on him, his lips curled up slightly and he took the ring, waiting for a moment before grabbing Die's left hand, sliding it on his ring finger, then looking up into his eyes, breathless.

Tears instantly filled Die's eyes as Kyo took his left hand and slid the ring onto his ring finger. The box slipped from his fingers to the floor and a moment later, his arms were around Kyo, holding him so close he was probably suffocating him. He kissed the side of his head, then his cheek, and then his shoulder before almost sobbing out, "The answer is yes. God yes."

Kyo gasped softly as he was pulled into Die's embrace, his arms winding around the other tightly, his breath hitching in his throat before coming out in what could only be a sob. He didn't bother speaking at the moment, couldn't if he had wanted to. His heart felt like it was going to burst with happiness at Die's acceptance. It meant so much more, went so far beyond just those words and that act. He hadn't even asked the question out loud. He hadn't needed to.

Die tucked his face against Kyo's neck, letting himself get out all the pent up emotion that way, the tears coming as he just focused on breathing and not squishing Kyo completely against him. It took him a few minutes to calm down and when he did, he just wiped his tears on Kyo's shoulder and then pulled back to frame his face with his hands, leaning in and kissing him deeply.

Kyo stroked his fingers through Die's hair as his lover cried against his neck, his own tears streaking down his face as he quietly sniffled. When Die pulled back and kissed him, he let out a soft sound, returning the kiss with equal passion and love, his hands moving to grip the other's shoulders tightly, holding on for dear life it seemed.

Die kissed him passionately, but he stopped short of actually pushing it into a sexual nature. When he pulled back, his eyes were sparkling and he gave Kyo the happiest of smiles. "Does that mean I get to plan us an engagement party?" He beamed at him and held out his hand, looking at the ring.

Kyo was flushed by the time Die released his lips. He looked at him and the beautiful look on his face, about to comment on it when the other mentioned an engagement party. He blinked a couple of times then laughed softly, reached out to grasp Die's hand, looking at the ring and how well it suited him. "You can do whatever you want, my beautiful Die."

Die beamed at him and blushed a little. "I think I'll definitely plan one then. Only close people who need to know, but... still." He leaned in and kissed his lips hard one more time before extracting himself from where he'd pretty much landed on Kyo's lap and settled down, crossing his legs to hide the slight bulge he'd given himself.

Kyo smiled softly and brushed his hand over Die's cheek. "Whatever you find suitable will be fine with me... as long as there are only a few people." He looked at Die then bit his lip again, wondering if he should take it to the next level or if it would inappropriate. "Die... my Daisuke... I love you so much," he murmured before finally moving to straddle Die's lap, kissing him softly.

Die let out a soft sound as Kyo straddled his lap. He had no choice but to put his legs down or else he'd be jabbing Kyo with his knee. He just hoped Kyo wouldn't be upset by how easily he got aroused these days. But the truth was, he'd been keeping himself from fucking Kyo every single chance just because he didn't want to tire him out with much pain he'd been in already. And when he was with him all day, it was difficult to go do anything by himself. So honestly, being even close to him at night was getting him aroused. But he was nothing if not a patient man and he loved Kyo for far more than his body, so it wasn't an issue, not in the least. His only thought was if the other would be somehow displeased he was like this already.

Kyo could immediately feel what state Die was currently in and let a small smirk play on his lips. He loved Die and everything about him, including his seemingly endless libido. He knew the last month or so had been difficult on them both and that his lover had been holding back for his sake. "I love that I can get you worked up so quickly, you know that?" He leaned in and nibbled Die's bottom lip, taking it slow for now.

Die felt relief pour through him at Kyo's comment. He felt much better about how he was reacting to the other with just those words. He licked his lips just before Kyo leaned in to bite his lip. He let out a soft groan, letting his hands settle on Kyo's hips, gently sliding his hands over the little strip of flesh between Kyo's jeans and his shirt.

Kyo shivered slightly at the touch of Die's hands. It had been too long, even for his own touch. He still had healing scratches from the last time he begged Die for a different sort of release that had ended in a quick hand job, but other than that, he'd had no sort of pleasure. He dipped his head down to lick and kiss at Die's neck, letting out a soft sound of pleasure as he shifted in his lap, things definitely heating up for him. 

Die groaned as Kyo shifted on his lap, one hand slipping up into his hair, lightly pulling on it. He huffed out a little breath, arching up toward him a little and then pulling him closer against him. His other hand slipped up under Kyo's shirt, short nails lightly scraping down his lover's side.

Kyo squirmed against Die, his arousal quickly ramping up as he re-situated his legs, pushing against Die more firmly and letting out a soft groan. He slid his hands over Die's chest then slipped them under his shirt, moving around to scratch at his back. "I want you. I _need _you."__

__Die's hips bucked a little when Kyo shifted closer. It felt so good to stop holding himself back, to let Kyo know how aroused he was right then. When the other spoke up, he let out a loud moan, not holding it back at all, whimpering a little just after. He shuddered, pushing his hand down into the back of his pants._ _

__Kyo loved it when Die let himself go, loved to feel his body shifted and squirming. He shifted back and slid his own shirt off before leaning down to kiss Die with a hint of desperation, groaning as he wiggled his hips at Die's touch._ _

__Die watched as Kyo revealed his body to him, his hand that had been in his hair slipping down his chest. He lightly pinched one nipple and then ran his fingertips over his abs, lightly tracing them. He let out another whimper as their mouths collided, immediately pushing his tongue against the other's lips._ _

__Kyo shuddered and let out a whine at the attention to his nipple, the feeling going straight to his groin. He eagerly accepted Die's tongue in his mouth, sucking it in a lewd imitation of another act. He moved his hand to scrape over Die's belly then dipped it down between them, brushing over his lover's crotch, smirking against his mouth at the sizable tent he found there._ _

__Die let out a rather unmanly sound as the other started to suck on his tongue. His hips jerked when Kyo touched his erection, pleasure sliding through his body. His control snapped in that moment, everything he'd planned about slowness flying out the window. Both hands went to Kyo's pants, unfastening them and shoving them down. "Oh god," he hissed out, "now... need you now._ _

__Kyo was slightly taken aback at Die's abrupt change of pace but his aching length showed that he was more than okay with it. He groaned and shifted off Die's lap, quickly ridding himself of his pants. Reaching in between the cushions, he pulled out a bottle of lube before settling back on Die's lap. He lubed up his fingers and slid them behind himself, pushing two into his body with a whimper, the fit tight but not painful. He opened his eyes and looked at Die as he started rocking back on his hand, moaning._ _

__Die let out a little groan, watching Kyo get up and take off his pants. He quickly undid his own pants, freeing his cock. He gave it a few languid strokes as he watched Kyo get the lube and then start prepping himself. "Gods," he whispered out, jerking off faster for a moment before he stopped himself and reached to get Kyo's length instead, stroking him slowly, in sharp contrast to his own._ _

__Kyo groaned as he watched Die stroke himself while he stretched his passage. He added a third finger then let out a lewd moan as Die's hand wrapped around his rigid cock, a shudder going through him._ _

__He finally deemed himself prepped enough and slid his fingers out, quickly wiping them off before shifting forward and grasping Die's dick, moving into position and sliding down onto it as slowly as he could, his body shuddering as his lover filled._ _

__Die let out a little gasp as Kyo pulled his fingers free, watching him intently. It had been far too long and he was more than a little antsy about the whole thing. After a few moments passed and then Kyo was lowering himself on Die's length. Die tilted his head back and let out a loud moan, his hands on the other's hips. "Fuck," he breathed out._ _

__Kyo stilled once he was fully seated on Die's length, his body thrumming with pleasure. He reached out and pushed his hands under Die's shirt, scratching over his chest and nipples, teasing them for a moment while his body adjusted. After a few seconds though, he grew impatient and slowly rocked forward then back, setting up a slow pace for the moment._ _

__The touch on his nipples gave Die a little jolt of pleasure and he blushed, sliding his arms around the other. The moment the other started to move, he had to bite down on his lip to not start moaning immediately._ _

__Kyo shifted slightly and started bouncing on Die's cock, his head dropping back as he let out a loud moan, his hands sliding up to hold onto Die's shoulders, clinging to them as he rode him with increasing intensity._ _

__Die gasped, yanking the other toward him and thrusting up into his body. He bit his lip a little and then gave up, a string of curses flowing freely from his lips as he started to thrust up into the other's body._ _

__Kyo felt his control snap and he let out a loud hoarse moan, his body bowing slightly as Die hit his prostate, causing his cock to throb almost painfully. "Oh _FUCK_!"_ _

__Die thrust faster into the other's body and shuddered a little, closing his eyes. He knew he wasn't gonna make it, for sure. He grabbed Kyo's hips and held him down on him for a moment as he started to cum, some strange strangled version of Kyo's name slipping out of his lips._ _

__Kyo couldn't stop the sounds spilling from his lips as Die sped up, his body almost overly sensitive. He cried out Die's name as the other held him down and began to cum within him, his nails scratching roughly down Die's chest as he shuddering, feeling every pulse of Die's cock._ _

__Die finished at long last, reaching to grab his lover's cock and start jerking him off. He pushed his face against his neck and gently kissed him, shivering slightly._ _

__It didn't take long after Die started stroking him for Kyo to lose it all over the other's stomach with another loud cry, pain going through his throat at the strain, but his body shuddering as he clenched around Die's length. After a moment, he groaned and slumped forward, digging his fingers in Die's hair, moaning softly. "I love you so much."_ _

__Die clung to him, whimpering softly. "God, I love you, too, baby." He slid his hand up the other's thigh and lightly squeezed it as he milked him completely dry. He pulled him close and kissed his cheek over and over. "I love you beyond anything else in my life."_ _

__Kyo whimpered and buried his head against Die's neck, holding tightly onto him. "I can't live without you... that's why..." he reached and grabbed Die's left hand, looking at the ring there before pulling it to his lips, his throat closing up a bit._ _

__Die pulled him close, both arms slipping around him. "And I can't without you... I mean it." He pressed his lips to Kyo's. "You've made everything in my life matter. And you've brought me the ultimate happiness."_ _

__Kyo gave Die a lingering kiss then pulled back, caressing his face. "I can't even describe how much you've saved me."_ _

__Die framed Kyo's face with his hands and swallowed hard. "I saved you?" he asked softly._ _

__Kyo looked into Die's eyes and licked his lips. "Yes, you saved me... from the darkest place a person can get."_ _

__Die's eyes filled with tears, though he didn't let them spill over. He just swallowed against them and pulled Kyo close again, pressing his lips to his cheek a bit harshly. "I'm glad I could."_ _

__Kyo brought his hand up to cradle Die's head, swallowing several times in a pathetic attempt to control his own emotions._ _

__Die shifted Kyo closer to him and murmured, "Hold onto me." A moment later, he stood up, his arms tightly around the other, carrying him toward the bedroom._ _

__Kyo obeyed, slipping his arms around tightly, holding to him tightly as he was carried to the bedroom, nuzzling his head against Die's neck._ _

__Die gently placed Kyo on the bed, ridding himself of his own pants and shirt. He turned off the light and did a quick mop-up job on both of them. He kissed his lips gently and then curled up next to him, tugging Kyo into his arms. It was hitting him hard knowing he'd have lost Kyo if he hadn't ended up in the other's arms late one night. He couldn't even bear the thought that Kyo could have been gone right then rather than in his arms. But then again, fate had mysterious ways of working, and he did have the other. "You are my world, you know that, right?"_ _

__Kyo let Die clean them up then wrapped himself around the other, clinging tightly, a soft sound escaping him. "And you are my world."_ _

__Die pressed his lips against Kyo's ear and whispered out, "I know I already said yes... but will you ask me out loud?"_ _

__Kyo's eyes widened a bit, his cheeks flushing as he nodded. He turned and looked into Die's eyes, taking his left hand and stroking his thumb over the ring. "Daisuke... you are, and always have been, my savior. You've pulled me from the deepest of hells and saved my very soul. Will you be mine? Forever?"_ _

__Die's lower lip actually trembled as Kyo asked him the very question he'd dreamed of before. He swallowed thickly and nodded. "There's never been a doubt in my mind that I want to spend my life with you. Always and forever."_ _

__Kyo couldn't even respond. He felt damn near foolish as several tears dripped down his cheeks but he ignored them and leaned in to press his lips to Die's, his bottom one trembling._ _

__Die let out a soft sob against Kyo's lips as he kissed him hard. When he pulled back, he gave him a huge watery smile. "Does anyone know you were going to do this?"_ _

__Kyo brushed Die's hair back then bit his lip, shaking his head. "To be honest, I wasn't sure I was going to... I was scared you'd think I was off my rocker."_ _

__"God no... baby. Can I be completely honest?" He brushed the back of his hand over Kyo's cheek._ _

__Kyo nodded, reaching up to catch Die's hand and lace their fingers. "Always..."_ _

__"I've been waiting a very long time to hear you propose to me." He cupped his cheek and smiled softly._ _

__Kyo blushed, squeezing Die's hand tightly and leaning forward to kiss him softly. "I'm glad. I can't describe how ha-", he choked up, unable to get anymore out. It was proving to be too emotional for him, too overwhelming._ _

__Die pressed a finger to Kyo's lips. "Shh... it's okay. I get it, trust me, I do." He pulled the covers up around them, tucking them in tightly and snuggling down into the pillows._ _

__Kyo swallowed a few times then curled up against Die, resting his head on his lover's... his _fiancée's_ chest, his eyes sliding shut as he realized that he was completely exhausted. After a few moments, he murmured out. "I love you, my Daisuke." _ _

__"I love you so much, Tooru," Die whispered back._ _


	22. Chapter 22

The day outside seemed to reflect exactly how Die himself felt right then. It had been pouring rain since roughly one in the morning and - even now in the light of day - everything was a dull, dreary grey. The sun hadn't peeked out even once during the whole time Die had been watching, and he was starting to give up hope on the idea of it.

He shifted, pushing away from the window finally, blowing a stray strand of hair back from his forehead. His eyes were swollen and red from all the tears he'd shed in the past few hours and he looked equally as exhausted as he felt. The honest reflection of the whole thing was that he was worried as hell about Kyo. They'd had him in surgery now for far longer than he'd been told it would take, and no one was telling him anything. Twice already he'd taken his medication, staving off the ever-so-likely panic attack right on the edge of it.

Even looking over everything he wanted to plan for their engagement party hadn't really helped him. And that included the over 650,000 yen he'd put on his credit card ordering the supplies for it. But it helped, even if just a little, to know he was making plans for the future; a future that involved Kyo.

As if reading Die's mind, the doctor knocked and then entered the small, private waiting room, still wearing surgery scrubs. He looked rather exhausted himself as he cleared his throat. "Mr. Andou?" 

Die immediately turned, almost tripping over his own feet, the moment that the doctor came in and spoke to him. He gave the doctor a look of pure trepidation. "Yes?"

The doctor looked Die over and offered him a slight smile. "Mr. Niimura is out of surgery now and is in the recovery room. You will be able to go see him very soon. The prognosis is very favorable at this point as long as he follows the aftercare instructions and rehabilitation procedures." 

He paused to give Die a bit of a stern look. "I've been made aware of your relationship so I will entrust you to make sure he is kept silent for the duration of the healing process. This can be difficult and may take nearly a month, but until I've given him the all clear to begin talking again, it is imperative that he doesn't even try. "

Die almost deflated then, having to back up to a chair, collapsing in it and narrowly avoiding knocking his laptop off the desk beside him. He took in a few deep breaths of air and let the tears slide down his cheeks, this time in relief. He swallowed thickly and then nodded. "Right, I understand. No talking. It's fine. We made him mostly not talk before, so it'll be okay." 

The doctor reached out and kindly patted Die's shoulder. "Which likely helped keep this from being worse than it was."

Die ran his palms over his thighs and looked a little troubled. "Why did it take so long?"

At Die's question, he gave a slight shrug of the shoulders. "Occasionally, we find that some patients are stubborn and unwilling to let go of their polyps, so it takes a little more finessing to remove them without further damaging the vocal chords." 

Die looked a bit more worried at that. "Is... is that bad? Does it mean more healing for him?"

The doctor held up his hand and shook his head. "Not at all. The true test of time with his healing will come during therapy and vocal rehabilitation." He held out Kyo's chart for Die. "We have placed him on some rather strong pain killers as he seemed to have a high tolerance for them. He's also been prescribed antibiotics to keep any infections at bay. A nurse will come inform you when he's awake and ready for visitors." He handed Die a business card. "Feel free to call me if any complications arise or even if you have questions." 

Die took his chart to look at it for a moment before handing it back, all of it gibberish to him. He took the card and nodded. "Thank you." With that, he took out his phone and quickly went about entering the number for the doctor into it, so he didn't have to keep track of his papers. 

A few minutes passed before Die finally gave up, going back to his email, happy to see his Chrome Hearts representative had gotten back to him. He quickly placed an order for what amounted to around $5000 US for an entire glass and carafe set they'd collaborated with Baccarat for and a pair of red Doc Martins that matched the vest he'd ordered quite nicely.

The doctor took the chart and exited the room with a bow, going to check on Kyo and then going about his business, passing Toshiya in the hallway.

Toshiya entered the waiting room with concern written on his face. "Was that Kyo's doctor? Is everything okay? What's taking so long?" 

Die looked up when Toshiya came in, sending the email. He let out a soft sigh and then ran a hand over his face. "He's out of surgery. Something about the removal being stubborn, but he's fine according to the doctor." He offered the card to Toshiya, figuring he might want it as well.

Toshiya looked instantly relieved and let out a breath he felt like he'd been holding all day. He took the card and went about entering the number in his phone then handed it back. "So I can finally call Shinya and let him know it's all good?" Their drummer had declined being there due to a solid fear of 'hospital germs'.

Die nodded. "Yeah, tell him. For sure." He discreetly closed his laptop, not wanting to give away anything before he broke the news to everyone at the party. 

The bassist nodded, peering at Die then reaching out and clasping his shoulder. "You okay, man? You look like you're about to fall apart at the seams." 

Die looked up at him and shook his head a little. "Honestly, no, I'm not okay. I'm tired and I hurt and... god I was so fucking worried."

Toshiya nodded and leaned down to hug Die a little. "It's okay though. He's fine and we're all going to get through this." He offered the other a small smile then stood back. "I'm going to run and call Shin. Let me know when we can see him, yeah?" 

Die nodded a little and glanced over at the guest cot he'd been given. He relented finally, crawling onto the bed and sort of flopping down, his head hitting the pillow harshly. He was truly exhausted.

Twenty minutes later, a nurse tapped on the door and poked her head in. "Excuse me, Mr. Andou?" Perplexed when she didn't get a response, she moved over and lightly shook Die's shoulder. "Mr. Andou?" 

Die snorted himself awake at the touch of the nurse's hand on his shoulder. He looked up and blinked a few times, looking perplexed. "Y-yeah?"

The nurse bobbed her head and smiled. "I'm sorry to disturb you, but I thought you would like to know that Mr. Niimura is currently awake... sort of... and I think he would really like to see you." She looked just the slightest bit antsy, ready to insist that Die came with her if she had to. 

Die pushed himself up immediately, wiping his hands over his eyes and shaking his head a little to clear it. "I didn't really mean to fall asleep, I'm sorry. It's just... it's been three days." He gave a rueful little chuckle. "I'm not what I used to be." A moment later, he was on his feet, ready to be lead off.

The nurse gave Die a little smile and nodded. "I understand. These things can be very stressful. Now, if you will come with me..." She turned and led the way out of the room and down the long hall, making several turns before finally coming to a stop in front of a white door with a chart attached to it, Kyo's name written clearly at the top. 

"Here we are. I'm sure the doctor informed you that Mr. Niimura is not to speak, so we have provided a miniature white board for him if he feels up to it." She hesitated then looked at Die for a moment. "He is still under heavy sedation so his actions are... excusable." She opened the door and let Die in, bowing and then leaving him to it. 

Die nodded. "I know. I won't let him talk, I promise." He reached up and scratched lightly at his scalp before he headed into the room. He quickly went to Kyo's bedside, reaching to touch his lover's cheek. "Baby..."

Kyo laid there, hooked to several machines via IVs and tubes. He had his eyes closed, but when Die spoke, they popped open and immediately tried reaching out to him, wincing as his arm still felt like it had lead in it. 

Die shifted closer, trying to get him to not move. "Shhh, baby, it's okay. Stay still, I'll come to you." He sat down on the edge of the bed, gently rubbing over his fingers. "Everything's going to be okay."

Kyo blinked a few times, shaking his head, trying to claw his way to the surface of his mind. He felt Die's hand on him and he turned his own to squeeze it tightly. He wanted so badly to open his mouth and speak but at the same time, the dull throbbing in his throat and neck reminded him that there was no way that was happening any time soon. 

Die reached to run his hand over the other's forehead, his eyes full of worry. "God, baby... I was so... so worried. You were in there a while."

Kyo gave Die a questioning look, his eyebrows knitting together. He'd had no concept of time while he'd been in the operating room of course, the anesthesia taking care of that. He squeezed Die's hand again, unable to do much else.

Die licked his lips lightly and then pulled his hand up to kiss his hand gently. "I'm so glad you're okay." Die put his hand back down and patted it, biting his at his lower lip. One-sided conversations were incredibly awkward.

Kyo attempted a smile but it came out as a grimace instead. He nodded and looked around slightly before gesturing a little with his hand, trying to point to the board and marker the nurse had left on his table. He had something to take care of and really, _really_ didn't feel like having a nurse do it. 

Die grabbed the board and marker and passed it over to him, uncapping the marker and handing it to Kyo before holding the board upright for him to write on.

Kyo made a face and shifted a bit before scrawling out in very sloppy, wobbly English. _"Pee."_ He frowned at Die then held out the marker, his hand trembling a little. He was already rather tired of this feeling and would be delighted when it went away even though he knew that that was when the pain would truly come.

Die took the marker back and turned the board around, reading it. He swallowed thickly and then gave a single nod. After a moment, he erased the board and put it aside. He knew his way around hospitals pretty well and he bent down, looking under the bed and came up with a little jug, just like he'd thought he would. He uncapped it and pulled the curtain a bit to give them some privacy. Then he pushed up the other's hospital gown, getting the jug in place against Kyo's crotch, making sure everything was facing the right way. "Okay, go for it."

Kyo watched Die get the jug, his eyebrow rising a bit at the other's knowledge of where that would be. He put it aside though in favor of feeling vaguely humiliated when said jug was pushed against him. His bladder insisted though and in a moment, he started to relieve himself into it, letting out a huff through his nose. 

Die shifted a little, trying so very hard not to get in any way aroused by this. It was humiliating for Kyo and that wasn't something he was going to let himself enjoy. He pursed his lips a little and waited it out, glancing over every few seconds to make sure Kyo wasn't leaking on the bed or himself. 

Kyo finally finished up, the last few spurts coming out slowly. When he felt he'd dripped as much as he could, he tapped the bed rail to get Die's attention, gesturing at it with a shooing motion. He'd be real happy when he could actually move on his own as this was already irritating to him. 

Die took the jug away carefully and moved off toward the bathroom. He dumped it in the toilet and flushed, carefully rinsing it out and then coming back out. He settled down on the edge of the bed again and smiled softly at Kyo as he pushed the jug back under the bed. "Better?"

Kyo listened to Die take care of the mess then looked up at him, nodding at the question. He reached for Die's hand again, squeezing it tightly and mouthing, "Love you."

"I love you, too, baby." He gently ran a hand over the other's arm. It was going to be a hell of a long few days, for damn sure. He pulled out his phone and sent a text to Toshiya and Kaoru that Kyo was awake.

Kyo settled back, closing his eyes and dozing off lightly without meaning to, his hand keeping hold of Die's in a tight grip. 

Toshiya got the text from Die and turned to nudge Kaoru awake. "Oi... Kyo's awake."

Kaoru woke up with a start, his eyes a bit wide. A moment later he was on his feet. "Okay, c'mon. Let's go see him then."

Toshiya nodded and stood, heading down the hall with Kaoru, anxious to see that Kyo was alright with his own eyes. When they got to the room, he knocked lightly and waited for Die to let them in, just in case. "Hope he's alright..." 

Kaoru nodded. "I think Die would have told us if he wasn't." He paused behind Toshiya, waiting on the door to be answered.

At the knock, Die came to the door and opened it, ushering the others into the room.

Toshiya entered first, smiling at Die then moving to Kyo's bedside. "Hey Kyo, how ya doing? Is Die playing nurse for you?" He grinned, trying to ease the tension with bad jokes. 

Kyo came awake again at the knock and then looked at Toshiya, rolling his eyes and flipping him off, unable to retaliate in any other way. 

Kaoru glanced at Die seeing how awkward he looked with the idea of Toshiya's joke. He cleared his throat and moved to the other side of Kyo's bed, looking over the hookup and everything with a wince. "Not gonna sugar coat it, I bet you feel like shit."

Kyo looked up at Kaoru and nodded, gesturing to the tubes and crap with a grimace. He squirmed around a bit then settled again, huffing. 

Toshiya reached out and patted Kyo's shoulder lightly. "Don't worry, I think they said you only have to be here overnight and then you get to go home to a diet of miso and smoothies." 

This caused Kyo to twirl his finger around as if saying "woohoo" in a sarcastic manner.

Die chuckled a little. "Hey, I can make some badass miso, so it won't be so bad, you know?"

Kaoru had to smile at that at least, leaning against the wall.

Kyo glanced to Die and smiled a little then let out a sigh, as best as he could. If he was honest he almost wanted to be alone, with the exception of Die, because having the others see him like this was suffocating.

Toshiya chuckled softly and moved to perch on a chair beside Kaoru, addressing Die instead of Kyo. "Did they say how long it would be before he could talk again?" 

Die cleared his throat a little, playing with his keychain and biting his lip slightly. "A month at the least before he can start therapy."

Kaoru winced slightly, but didn't say anything. He pulled out his phone and started texting a few people higher up that needed to know.

Toshiya blanched and gave Kyo a sympathetic look. "That's rough. Too bad we don't know sign language!" 

Kyo shrugged and then looked at Die before closing his eyes again. They had a long, hard road ahead of them and he was dreading it even more so than he had been the surgery. 

Die watched Kyo close his eyes and then silently shooed the other two toward the door with a quiet, "I think it's best if he's mostly alone for now." He swallowed a little and sighed.

Toshiya frowned, but exited the room before reaching out to hug Die. "Just give him some time, he's probably struggling pretty hard with this... and I can only imagine how it must be for you, too." 

Die hugged the bassist back a little and nodded. "It's fine. It just happens." He took a breath and backed up. "I'll keep in touch, I promise."

Kaoru passed him and gently patted his arm. "I'll bring back some food for you. I know you haven't eaten since yesterday."

Toshiya nodded and then headed on, knowing Kaoru would be following him. 

Kyo listened to their muffled voices, knowing they were talking about him but not being able to find the strength to care. The mention of food filtered into him and his stomach gave a loud growl, causing him to frown. He didn't even want to fool with the logistics of trying to eat or anything like that. 

Die came back in after a moment and went to drag a chair from the corner closer to Kyo's bedside. He settled down and took Kyo's hand in his own. "I'm glad you're okay, baby."

Kyo turned to look at Die, smiling softly and nodding, holding his hand. After a moment, he reached out to grab the board and marker, finding it within his reach this time. He scribbled on it for a moment, his writing a bit more legible now that he had some control over his limbs. _"Get some sleep..."_

Die gave him a sad little look and shook his head. "I'm not leaving your side, Kyo. I refuse."

Kyo bit his lip then shrugged, scooting over as far as he could before patting the space beside him. 

Die looked at the spot and then the cords, making sure they were all on the other side. After some deliberation, he carefully moved to slide into the bed beside him. He curled up next to him and put his head on Kyo's shoulder, closing his eyes.

Kyo smiled a little, shifting around a bit to turn his head and press dry lips to Die's forehead, his hand coming up to brush through his hair lightly before he closed his own eyes and drifted to sleep. Die was asleep within ten minutes, snoring faintly, his head on Kyo's shoulder. He thankfully didn't dream, far too exhausted to get there.

\---

It had been four days since his surgery and Kyo was about fed up with being forced to rest and take it easy. He finished off what must have been his hundredth cup of miso and set the dish down on his bedside table with a thunk. He looked around the room with a sour look before picking up his phone and texting Die. _"I'm bored."_

Die was sitting in front of the computer in the living room, flipping through things for the party he was setting up when his phone vibrated. He pulled out his phone and smiled at the text, closing his laptop and getting up. He padded into the bedroom and came to sit down on the bed. "Bored, hmm?"

Kyo looked up as Die entered the room and full out pouted at him, nodding his head. He picked up his new best friend, the white board and scribbled on it. _"Ready to claw my eyeballs out..."_

Die read the message and made a face. "Not a grand plan. Anything you want to do? Watch a movie, play a board game?"

Kyo shrugged at the suggestions, sitting up and leaning against Die's side as he wrote out something else. _"How's the party planning going? Spend all my money yet?"_

Die snorted. "I spent all mine, for damn sure." He chuckled a little. "But fortunately it's all stuff we'll keep using after it's done, so... whatever."

Kyo laughed silently and shook his head before patting his lover's shoulder. With everything that was going on, his brain was having a hard time accepting the fact that he and Die were actually _engaged_. Musing over that for a moment, he snorted and scribbled out quickly, _"We should go to the US and get 'married' in Vegas._ " 

Die smiled softly at him. "Mmm... we should look into it, there's a few places in the US that allow it I think." He smiled softly.

Kyo scooted closer to Die and leaned in to kiss him softly in response, his hand finding Die's, running his thumb over the ring there. 

Die smiled in response to Kyo's actions, scooting closer to him. After a moment, he swallowed thickly and murmured, "Baby... how have you been doing? I mean... are the meds working out okay for you? Any pain?"

Kyo leaned back slightly to glance up at Die then away, shrugging a little and waving his hand. In truth, there had been a lot more pain than he'd let on, particularly in the middle of the night. He had refused to burden Die with it though because the other seemed so stressed out over the whole situation as it was. 

Die sighed softly and leaned back on the pillows as well. "Do you want to be surprised by what I'm doing with the party or do you want to know now?"

Kyo made himself comfortable against Die's chest, biting his lip. In a way, he wanted to know but in another way, he wanted to be surprised. After debating it for a few moments, he held up his hand and pinched his fingers together, indicating he'd like to know a little. 

Die chuckled and pulled his phone out, bringing up the picture of the glassware he'd ordered from Chrome Hearts. "I ordered this for us. First use will be the party, but I'll be damned if I'm not using it all the time."

Kyo looked at the glassware and nodded his head appreciatively, giving Die a thumbs up sign. It was beautiful and elegant yet fit them and their lifestyle. 

"I love it, it's gorgeous, isn't it?" He pulled his phone back and went over a few other photos before deciding that was enough and closing his phone. "Should we start writing the list of who to invite?"

Kyo nodded then looked over the pictures, approving each item. When Die mentioned the guest list, he wrinkled his nose, but nodded again. 

Die reached over and grabbed a notepad and a pen. He wrote their bandmates names at the top, then under it, his brother's name, and his mom and dad. Then with a questioning look, he wrote down Boss' name. "Yes or no?"

Kyo shifted and sat up a bit, leaning against Die's chest. He read over the list and nodded. So far, he had no problems with the list. 

Die wrote down Kyo's parent's names, as well as that of his sister, and held it out to him. "I think they should know. Even if... they somehow get mad about it."

Kyo looked at his family's names, his lips pressing into a thin line. His sister would be okay and maybe even his mother, but he knew - could almost hear - his father's reaction. Not screaming or yelling, no. It would simply be silence and a disappointed look on his face. 

With a sigh, he shrugged, handing the list back. 

"Maybe we can go ahead and tell them ahead of time. And... er... avoid the awkward?" He didn't know how it'd float, but he knew it wouldn't be good if Kyo had already been keeping it from them.

Kyo just nodded, shrugging a little. Truth be told, he couldn't remember the last time he'd actually spoken with his family. He hadn't even thought to inform them of his surgery. Letting out a huff, he pushed his fingers through his hair, unsure of what to "say" or do. 

"How about we start with your sister? I've met her before and she was really sweet, so... I think that would work best, yeah?" He reached to push some hair behind Kyo's ear.

Kyo leaned into Die's touch and nodded, finding that to be the lesser of evils. His sister would probably just be angry that he'd waited so long to tell her about his relationship with Die in the first place. 

Die made a little sound and added a few other names to the list, including the entirety of Merry, and some of the staff members they were closer to, including Nora and Rick.

Kyo watched Die add names, nodding with each one, knowing their fellow musicians would be fine and happy for them. He smiled a little at the addition of Rick and Nora's names, having been about to suggest them as well. He sat there for a moment then took the pen, scribbling Cipher's name down in the corner with a question mark before looking up at Die.

Die's cheeks immediately went pink at the idea of inviting Cipher. His lips worked for a moment before he finally just wrote his name down along with Kyo's, the vocalist of D'ERLANGER. He pursed his lips then, pretty much out of people to put on the list. "Anyone else, baby?"

Kyo felt the vaguest flair of jealousy at the pink tinge on Die's cheeks at the mention of Cipher, but he shook his head and smiled, knowing that his lover was just that, _his_. 

At Die's question, he shrugged and shook his head again, not being able to think of anyone else he wanted there. Instead, he seized the pen again and flipped the page, scribbling on the back. _Kiss me._

Die chuckled softly, putting the notepad aside and moving to straddle Kyo's lap. He settled there and framed his face with his hands. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Kyo's, giving him possibly the gentlest kiss he'd ever given anyone in his life.

Die's weight on him felt good and Kyo slipped his arms around his lover's waist, rubbing his hands up and down his sides as the other kissed him so gently. He returned the kiss, his hands moving around to stroke Die's back. It suddenly seemed like forever since he'd had a chance to just touch him.

Die let out a little sound after a moment. He pulled back from the kiss and beamed down at his lover. "I love you, I love you, I love you!"

Kyo found his face splitting into a wide grin at Die's exclamation. He just shook his head and stroked his hand over Die's face, mouthing the words back to him, his cheeks coloring a little.

Die giggled a little and then settled back on his knees. "Feeling better?" He ran his fingers down the other's arms ever so gently.

Kyo thought about it for a half a second then nodded. Die's enthusiasm over their engagement party seemed to have lifted his spirits and made him forget about the pain and such. He caught Die's hand and brought it up to press his lips against the ring, smiling softly. 

Die chuckled softly and leaned in, kissing Kyo's forehead. His stomach chose that moment to rumble loudly and he looked a bit embarrassed as he pulled back. "Er... sorry?"

Kyo snorted and reached down to pat Die's stomach. He grabbed his board and wrote on it before holding it up. _"Go eat!"_

Die made a little face and pushed himself upright, swallowing slightly. "Hmm... are you sure it's okay?" he asked softly.

Kyo brushed his hand over Die's back then made a shooing motion. He could tell Die had been neglecting his own needs too much and he felt damned guilty for it, knowing that he was the reason why. 

Die blushed slightly and then got up, quickly dashing to the kitchen. He came back in less than ten minutes, holding two slices of bread with some cheese between them. He proudly showed Kyo. "It's something I picked up in America. Quite good. You should have one once you're all healed." He plopped down next to him again and started to eat it.

Kyo peered at Die's food and nodded, shifting around to lean against his side while he ate, nodding a little, his eyelids closing. 

Die leaned to kiss Kyo's hair gently, chuckling softly. "Mmm... this is so good. It's wrong, but good."

Kyo laughed silently and nodded, shrugging a little. He wasn't so sure about it, but he'd give it a try once he could. 

He stayed leaned against Die for a minute before picking up the board and simply drawing a heart on it. 

Die made a little cooing sound at the idea of Kyo giving him a heart on his board. He smiled softly. "You're cute."

Kyo wrinkled his nose, blushing slightly before lightly whacking Die with the board. 

"Hey... it's true and I'm allowed to call you cute because you're my lover." He smiled softly.

Kyo rolled his eyes but the corners of his mouth were turned up in a smile. He shifted and kissed Die's cheek softly then nuzzled against his neck slightly. 

Die finished off his sandwich and grabbed Kyo, rolling him over on the bed and flopping on him. "Heeeee~!"

Kyo stared up at Die in surprise then wiggling under him lightly. He smirked and reached out, tickling Die's ribs a bit. 

Die let out a whine and shivered slightly. He let out another strange sound and then stuffed his face in Kyo's neck, blushing a bit as he squirmed a bit more.

Kyo reached up and laughed silently as he cupped Die's face and leaned up to properly kiss him.

Die let out a soft chuckle into the kiss and pressed his nose to Kyo's as well. "Mmm... you're gorgeous, my sweet, sweet pumpkin pie."

Kyo snorted and tugged Die's hair lightly at being called pumpkin pie, shaking his head. He pecked Die on the nose then shifted a bit, nipping the other's jaw. Pumpkin pie, indeed. 

Die giggled softly. "Oh my god..." he ducked his head. "We're hilarious like this. I love it."

Kyo smiled and ran his hand through Die's hair, shaking his head a little. It was cheesy but somehow... he loved it too.

Die shifted and laid his head down on the other's chest, smirking as Snow rushed into the room and hopped on the bed, coming to nudge at Kyo's hand, meowing insistently.

Kyo pressed his lips to the top of Die's head, loving the closeness. When the cat came bounding in, he smiled and reached out, scratching her head. 

Snow started to purr, winding her way around Kyo's hand as he petted her. Die watched with an amused smirk on his lips. "I think she's grown to like her other daddy."

Kyo shook his head, shifting a bit and getting Snow to lay down on Die's chest, continuing to pet her. He'd grown fond of the cat over the months she'd been in his life. He'd even bought her a pretty little pink collar with studs on it. 

Die flopped over on his side and watched as Kyo got her to come over and lay down on him. He smirked and reached up to scratch under her chin. "My two precious babies."

Kyo looked at Die and smiled, reaching out to stroke his hand through Die's hair. He sighed and maneuvered around enough to grab his board, writing on it while being careful not to disturb the cat. _"I feel so... domestic."_

Die beamed as he read Kyo's words. "That's because we are."

Kyo scooted close enough to kiss Die softly, nuzzling against his nose. He stayed that way, mouthing the words, "I love you." 

Die pecked Kyo's lips gently. "I love you, too."

\---

The days since Kyo's surgery had been long and a bit rough for everyone involved. But they were finding their ways in their own manners. On Die's part, he was looking after Kyo almost all the time, trying to keep an eye on him and make sure nothing went horribly wrong with the mood the other seemed to be in.   
It was a hard job, but someone had to do it and Die had volunteered for it with a passion that he rarely showed anything else besides music. He loved Kyo so much it hurt and the fact that the other had proposed to him only made him love him even more. 

The fact that he'd been going so far as to give Kyo the things he needed, when he needed them, despite any aversion to the idea of it, was testament enough to that fact. He couldn't count the number of times he'd already given Kyo the release he needed at the end of a razorblade, and all with seemingly no hesitation, despite the weight on his soul each time he pulled it across Kyo's skin.

But by the time they got to the end of a day, Die found himself usually exhausted and lately... unable to sleep. His stress was higher than perhaps even when they were touring and he felt badly about something. And that, in turn, led to him lying next to Kyo until he was asleep and then slipping out to the living room to read a book or watch TV until the wee hours of the morning.

Tonight, he had finally given in for the first time since they'd gotten home from the hospital nearly a month before, and decided to tend to himself a little. He'd poured himself a small tumbler of whiskey on the rocks and settled down with his laptop in his lazy-boy recliner. The whiskey was gone in a matter of minutes, the taste of it almost foreign at this point, but desired.

At first he'd just checked email and a few other things, reading through some fan mail, but in the end, he wound up right where he'd known he would. He logged into the one porn site he kept a running subscription to and started through the new videos section. By the second one he had his dick out and in hand, stroking himself languidly. The point wasn't to be fast, it was to actually enjoy getting himself off for the first time in a long while. Twice he brought himself close and then right back down, waiting until he wasn't at the edge and then working himself right back up again. He was so into it he didn't notice a single other thing, the room dark around him, only the light from his laptop illuminating anything. The seat creaked a little as he shifted his hips, stroking himself a little faster, a tiny groan of pleasure escaping his lips as he watched the guy on screen.

The past month had been hell on Earth for more than just Die. Kyo was spiraling into the darkest recesses of his mind with each passing day that he couldn't use his voice. He'd taken to begging Die to cut him with the blade until he nearly passed out just to find release from the nightmares in his mind. He could tell each cut weighed heavily on his lover and some part of him regretted it deeply. The other part relished in the pain and the sight of the lines scattered on his abdomen and thighs. 

Aside from that, he'd spent one too many lonely nights rubbing the cold area where Die was supposed to be sleeping, listening to the TV playing from the living room and feeling each time that his lover had simply had to escape from him and his brooding mood, furthering his feelings of guilt. Die already took care of him, waited on him hand and foot just to keep him resting and recovering. He hated it. He hated being helpless and feeling helpless. 

He found himself laying in an empty bed again, tossing and turning, trying to sleep, but unable to block out the pain and embarrassment of his first vocal therapy session. He'd failed each test and had been told that he would require more healing, which meant more time taken away from the band. He'd almost smashed the doctor's clipboard, only abstaining from doing so because Die had walked in right at that moment. 

He sighed and sat up, rubbing his eyes and looking around. Die wasn't in there and suddenly a thought popped into his head. He knew what would shake the God-awful feelings of despair. He could do the one thing that Die had been so afraid to let him do by himself. 

He scrambled out of the bed and snuck around, going to Die's drawer and digging in it a bit before coming up with the razor blade. With a shiver of anticipation, he ran his thumb over it, instantly slicing into his skin. He swallowed thickly and moved over to his side of the bed. 

He settled on the mattress and held the blade up, gazing at it before holding out his arm, dragging the tip of the blade down his forearm with a soft sound. 

He watched the blood well up then shifted, pushing his pants down to expose his thighs. He studied the area for a moment before making several shallow cuts over the skin there, gasping at the pain and following euphoria. It felt good, it gave him release of another kind. He wasn't sure why really, but he just kept cutting, scratching up both thighs before he caught himself. 

He pulled the bloodied blade up and looked at it, shuddering and panting as blood started to drip down his thighs. It wasn't enough though. He'd gotten too used to this and now he desperately needed much more than Die had ever given. With a deep breath, he leaned back and pushed his shirt up. He drew his lip between his teeth and placed the blade on his lower abdomen. He hesitated for a moment but then dug in and drew the blade over his skin, slicing deep into it, a hoarse cry escaping his lips. 

He sat there, bleeding, twitching a little as he watched it spill out of the wound. It wasn't slowing down like the other cuts did after a moment. It was actually getting worse and suddenly his heart began thumping hard with anxiety and he stood, swaying a little with dizziness as he started walking towards the living room. He needed Die. Now. 

The sight that greeted him though as he finally made it was enough to make him want to turn around and go back. How could he disturb Die at a time like this?

Die's cheeks were flushed, his heart beating faster and faster in his chest. His hand was like a blur over his cock, his pleasure almost too much. He couldn't wait any longer, it just wasn't going to happen tonight. He needed this... needed it so badly. His shoulders pushed back against the chair, the man on the screen finally cumming, his thick load spurting out over the desk in front of him. Die bit hard on his lip, trying not to groan, wanting to follow him over the edge so very badly. He shifted the laptop to one leg, his hips pushing up a few times into his hand. He was so close... so desperately close.

From the corner of his eye he saw movement and immediately he shut his laptop, his hand moving instead to try to cover what he was doing. Panic filtered through him, his heart hammering in his chest. He hadn't been that loud, had he? How could he have woken Kyo up? It was so inconsiderate of him. Mentally he cursed himself, struggling to get his pajama pants back over his erection, feeling ridiculously embarrassed to have been caught. He leaned to put his laptop in the floor and let down his foot rest, scooting to the edge of the chair. He still felt almost on the verge of orgasm, cursing himself for having ramped it up so much at the end. If he hadn't, then he wouldn't be caught like this. He'd just be freaked out, but not terrified he was going to jizz his fucking pants. "Kyo?"

Kyo watched Die nearly cum then stop, frantically getting himself tucked away and such. He felt a pang of guilt, knowing that had to hurt, but his stomach was bleeding too much and he didn't know what to do. Die had always been the one to patch him up. 

He shifted further into the room before he couldn't stand anymore and just slid to his knees. He murmured as loudly as he could, "Die... I'm so sorry... please..." He couldn't get his thoughts together, couldn't get himself to function long enough to tell Die what had happened. He just sat there, slightly hunched over with his hand pressed to the wound he'd given himself, shuddering. "I'm so stupid..."

Die stared at Kyo for a long moment before a different sort of panic slid through his veins as he watched Kyo crumple to the floor. "Oh god," he hissed out. Immediately he was on his feet, flicking on the light and kneeling by Kyo. He pried his hand away from the wound and cursed loudly, yanking off his shirt and pressing it to the wound. He pushed Kyo's hand back over it. "Hold it hard." 

With that, he was up again and rushing to the bathroom. He grabbed the kit he always packed for Kyo on tours and rushed back to his side, kneeling down. "Lay down on your back, right now." He quickly helped him move, not wanting to waste any time at all.

Kyo watched with guilt as Die took his own shirt off, ruining it with his blood. He bit his lip hard as Die pressed the cloth to the cut, a whole new pain coming over him. It hurt. It really fucking hurt and he'd done it to himself. 

As Die went to the bathroom, he slipped a little further into himself and started laughing with a raspy sound. When Die came back, he complied, laying on his back, but still laughing with that awful sound. He was losing it. He had to be.

Die shot Kyo a worried look that went far beyond any he'd given him to that very date. He didn't really know how to deal with that part, not in the least. But this, he needed to deal with before he dealt with the rest. He quickly removed the shirt and numbed the area. It was the best he could do with the time he had. He poured alcohol over it, and then butterfly taped it together. 

He quickly threaded the needle, looking at the wound and almost fearing to do this. But if he didn't, the tape wouldn't be enough. If he fucked it up, surely the doctor would just fix it later. Because at this rate... Kyo was still going to the hospital. Period. 

With a deep breath, he steadied himself and inserted the needle through Kyo's skin, knowing he was usually passed out for this and not knowing what was going to happen since he wasn't right then.

Kyo finally got a hold of himself and stopped laughing, just staring down at the cut as it oozed blood. Die seemed to know what he was doing and somewhere in his mind, he was grateful for that. 

The numbing stuff robbed him of the sharp pain he'd been feeling and he was surprised to find that the alcohol didn't burn, though it did sting like hell when it hit his thighs. He forgot about it as soon as he saw his lover threading the needle and found himself shuddering. "Oh..."

Die made a little face as he glanced up at Kyo. "It's bad. This is the only way." He did it as quickly and accurately as he could, pulling the skin back together. He got to the end and he quickly tied it off with a few expert little swoops of the needle. He removed the butterfly tape and wiped up the wound again. He added some of the quick-heal cream and put some butterfly tape back on now that it was clean. A piece of gauze and some surgical tape to hold it on and then he was done, putting everything back on top of the kit. 

Kyo felt his eyes roll into the back of his head as Die starting sewing his skin. It was beyond anything he'd ever seen and somehow, that made him bark out a hoarse laugh. It was irony, wasn't it? Irony that brought him to this point? 

He got up quickly, heading to the bedroom and grabbing a pair of sweat pants for Kyo and an old t-shirt and switching into his jeans and a new t-shirt in record time. He shoved on flip-flops and came back, phone already to his ear, their doctor on the line. "It... It's Kyo... he's cut himself up pretty bad and um... something... something's not right." He was talking in English, hoping Kyo would only catch part of it. He knelt down next to him, helping him get the pants on. "Will you come or should I bring him? Okay... yeah... now. No, I don't think so." He sighed, hanging up the phone and tossing Kyo's shirt aside. That was pointless. He carefully lifted him up in his arms bridal style and moved him to the couch, glad that Kyo was so small, it made his job less painful this way. He knelt next to him and gently touched his cheek. "Kyo... focus on me. Are you dizzy?"

He shook his head, trying to force away the fog that had settled in. He really hadn't meant to go so far... could he find his way back? He snorted as Die started moving him. He felt like a wet noodle. He couldn't even feel the pain from the gash in his stomach anymore. 

It finally occurred to him that Die was asking him a question. He squinted and blinked several times before nodding vaguely. Yes, he was dizzy... or something. He wasn't sure. 

Die stared at him, frowning a bit as he quickly began to web search a few things, not knowing what else to do right then. He quickly found that an IV was needed and he didn't have the supplies for that. He texted the doctor that they'd need an IV for Kyo because of the cut and he was dizzy and not acting right as well as that he'd been laughing like he'd lost it when he fell to the floor. When he was done, he scooted closer to him and just settled on holding him close, stroking his cheek, whispering sweet words to the other about how much he loved him and how much he cared.

Kyo found himself being held in a warm embrace and suddenly his mind cleared and he looked up to stare at Die in horror. What had he done? He didn't even have to ask though, he could feel the pain in his stomach and the pull of Die's stitches on the cut. Guilt and shame cut through him like a knife and he squirmed, trying to get away. He felt the lump forming in his throat and ugly tears started to streak down his face. "Oh G-god... Die."

Die held him closer. "Baby, calm down... calm down. Stay still or you'll hurt yourself more." He kept stroking at his face, gently wiping away the other's tears. "Ssshhhh... it's okay."

Kyo batted Die's hand away but held on to it as he whispered. "No, it isn't... let me go... just..." Just what? Leave him to rot in his own agony? He didn't even know anymore... and that scared him. He'd wanted that release so bad, but now what? He had stitches, _stitches_ in his stomach because he'd been a fool. And why was he sober now? What cruel God saw it necessary to yank him out of his euphoria? 

Die felt the panic slide up in his throat again as Kyo told him to let him go. It was like his worst fears coming true all of a sudden. He didn't know what else to do, so he let go and backed up. He sat back on his hands, pain starting to seize his chest, the world narrowing down dangerously in front of him. No... no... not now, not this, not right now. He grit his teeth hard, trying not to look like anything was wrong, desperately hoping he was pulling it off because his pills were in the bathroom, not his pocket.

Kyo watched the emotions slide over Die's face and he felt sick. He shook his head frantically and reached out, grasping at Die's shirt. He couldn't think straight. "Don't leave... just... fuck... Die..." What could he say to make it okay? Nothing... he knew _nothing_ was going to make this okay. "Stay... I-I need you..." 

In all honesty, Die could barely even focus on Kyo's words right then. Vaguely he heard someone knocking on the door, but he felt like his heart was going to pop out of his chest right then and that was the furthest thing from his mind at the moment. After a moment that sound stopped and he could vaguely hear someone else talking, but they were far away and not any of his concern. 

Instead, he tried to get himself back closer to Kyo again, knowing he needed to pull it together, to stop being like this and focus only on Kyo again. But it was so hard to focus through the blur of pain and anxiety in his mind. He held Kyo's hand tightly, his eyes closed to keep the wild look from showing to Kyo, his lips pressed into a thin line, jaw still clenched to keep himself from crying as emotional agony exploded inside his brain. This was definitely not a good time for this and he damn well knew it.

Kyo could see Die losing control, struggling against the panic attack that threatened to consume him. He wanted to tell him to go get his meds, but selfishly, he needed him there. 

A knock on the door sent panic through him and he jerked to look at Die, wandering who he'd called. When the other didn't even react to it to it, he settled slightly and just clung to him. Moments later, he heard the door open and he snapped his head up, seeing the doctor entering their apartment. Instead of himself though, he pointed to Die and muttered, "Help him."

Die finally noticed the doctor was in their apartment when Kyo said to help him. He shifted away from the doctor, shaking his head a little, still clinging to the last of his control. Kyo was more important. His was life threatening, Die's wasn't. He pointed to the patched up wound and shifted behind the arm of the couch where Kyo's head was at, out of the doctor's way. 

Their doctor knew what was happening to Die, but he also knew why. Between the two, he chose the more logical, quickly draping an IV bag over the back of the couch and attaching the line. He grasped Kyo's arm and alcohol swabbed it before expertly placing the needle into him and taping it down, not missing at all. He propped Kyo up a bit better and told him to stay still before moving to kneel in front of Die. "Daisuke... where are your meds?"

Die pointed shakily toward the bathroom, but by then tears were streaming down his face and he was rocking back and forth, his arms around his knees, breathing erratic. Everything felt hazy, like it wasn't real anymore. This wasn't happening. He'd just fallen asleep while on the computer. That had to be it.  
But a moment later, he had his mouth being forced open and a pill was being pushed under his tongue. Then he was once again left to his own devices as the doctor moved back to Kyo's side.

Kyo struggled vaguely as the doctor ignored his plea and started on him first. He wanted to say he was fine, that it wasn't that bad, but combined with the cuts on his legs, he'd apparently lost more blood that he'd thought. He scrubbed his free hand over his face, glancing up at the doctor's face, catching the look there before turning to look at Die. His poor lover was in full blown panic mode now and it was his fault. It seemed to always be his fault. 

A thought filtered into his mind, but he pushed it away. He'd made quite the mess and he knew that he owed Die so much for this. 

It took a few minutes, but eventually Die calmed down enough to just lean against the coffee table with his eyes closed. Now he felt drained, embarrassed, and extremely upset. His head was swimming from the stupid pill and he felt like everything was made of cotton, even the air around him. He wrinkled his nose and shifted a little, opening his eyes and watching the doctor and Kyo.

Quietly, the doctor began asking Kyo questions, most of them vague and not really pointed. But finally he got a bit more direct, flat out asking him a few things, the final of which was, "Are you feeling suicidal?"

Kyo laid there, feeling fuzzy around the edges again as everything seemed to calm down slightly in the room. It was an odd feeling, considering all that happened in the very little amount of time since he'd cut himself. 

As the doctor asked him several questions, he grew impatient, not wanting to answer them. The final one though made his chest squeeze tightly. Suicidal? Did he really want to selfishly leave Die? Was his pain... or the end of it... worth it? He only had to glance towards his lover to give a negative shake of his head. "No."

The doctor looked satisfied with that and then handed Kyo a little sheet of paper with a few questions on it for him to answer yes or no to. At the bottom it asked for a number of how many yes answers so they could rate how depressed he was. "Please answer these honestly. You can just put up a finger for each yes."

Kyo stared at the pamphlet for a moment then snorted, shaking his head as he answered yes to all of the symptoms except suicidal. He wasn't, not really... he was just frustrated and felt like giving up sometimes. 

The doctor watched his fingers as he counted up on them and then nodded. He took the paper from Kyo and on a whim, handed it over to Die as well, pointing to the instructions at the top. He then took out his phone and began sending in a prescription for Kyo. "I'm giving you some anti-depressants. Please take them daily." He looked him in the eyes. "I mean it, every single day or they won't work."

Die took the pamphlet and began to go over it, feeling like a freight train was barreling down on him as he finally got to the questions.

Kyo gave the doctor a bitter look. He'd been on anti-depressants before and had hated them with a passion. They made him numb and unable to do his job as an artist. He sighed softly and nodded anyway then glanced at Die, looking for his reaction. 

Die got through the pamphlet rather quickly, scoring low enough on both of them to not have anything that really needed to be addressed with anti-depressants. He handed them back with a soft explanation of his scores, the doctor nodding and patting his leg lightly.

Die watched the doctor send in the prescription, giving Kyo a hopeful sort of look, wanting him to feel better, no matter what. Because this was so far out of his control now, that he didn't know what to do.

After a moment, the doctor shifted forward and gently took up the sides of the bandage, looking over Die's work. "You did this?" he glanced back at him.  
Die nodded, a worried look on his face. "Yes... I did the best I could, given the circumstance."

"Die... this... wow." He put the bandages back down. "I've never seen more painstaking work to try to realign everything correctly. Did you take emergency training or something?"

Die nodded, his world slowly coming back into focus again. "Yeah..."

Kyo was only half listening to their conversation now, his mind floating away. He had to assume the doctor had put more than fluids or antibiotics or whatever into that IV because he was feeling pretty sleepy now. He did manage a faint smile as the doctor complimented Die on his handy work, pride swelling within him. 

The doctor quietly offered to get the meds for Die and come back with them, the guitarist agreeing and handing money over to him. He got up and left them, going back out the door, his supplies still there so he'd have to come back for them.

Die finally moved, coming to sit next to Kyo again, reaching up and taking hold of his hand, a sad look on his face. "I fucked up... I'm so sorry, baby."

Kyo heard the doctor leave then felt Die's hand on his. He turned his head to stare at him with bloodshot eyes as he spoke. His lover's words made him shake his head, his other hand coming up to grasp at Die's shirt. "No... no... I... it's my fault. It's my fault." 

Die's heart ached a little at Kyo's words. But he didn't see it that way, not at all. He'd failed to stay at Kyo's side, he'd gone to do something selfish and had left him there alone, with the razorblade in the room. This was his fault and his mess. And even more than that, he'd fucked up in the end and had a damned panic attack. He shifted closer to him and shook his head. "No... you're not to blame, please... it's not your fault. I should have been there."

Kyo closed his eyes as Die blamed himself. When he opened them, he looked angry. "Stop it! Stop... blaming yourself for my mistakes. Please." His look softened as he caressed Die's cheek, frowning slightly. "I should have... known you were suffering..." Kyo breathed out.

Die's heart lurched at Kyo's tongue lashing. He just closed his mouth, not knowing what else to say or do. He still blamed himself because if he'd been lying in bed next to Kyo, it never would have happened to start with. But deeper than that, it was the fact that he'd been doing something so selfish while Kyo was suffering. That just wasn't right. Not in the least.

Kyo could tell that Die was still blaming himself and there was little he could do about it. Instead, he reached out and tugged Die close, pressing their lips together. "Please... forgive me... and yourself."

Die just gave a little tiny nod and then put his head on Kyo's chest, a few tears sliding down onto the other as he closed his eyes. 

From the other side of the room he heard a faint moan and his eyes popped open as he sat up straight, staring at his computer in absolute horror. "Oh fuck meeee~" he hissed out, letting go of Kyo and pushing himself upright, quickly heading to his laptop to open it and shut off the stupid video. Nice of it to remind the world what he'd been doing, as if he wasn't already humiliated enough.

Kyo petted Die's hair, swallowing thickly as he felt moisture on his chest. He'd really screwed up this time and he knew it. He pushed that aside for now though as Die's laptop made a rude sound, the faintest chuckle slipping out. 

Die quickly shut off the video and logged out of the site, but not before making a mental note to just cancel his subscription and get rid of all his other porn on the laptop. He was so not getting caught doing that again. The sheer trauma of it was horrid. With a soft sigh, he shut the thing off and placed it back on the table rather than the floor. Sometimes, he just couldn't win, and today was certainly one of those days.

Kyo lay still while Die got rid of the offending noise, another laugh bubbling up in his throat. He must be losing it for real this time, because he found the whole situation hilarious. Here he was, cut up by his own hand and there Die was, having been damn near mid-orgasm and then having a panic attack. It was turning into one big cluster-fuck. He snorted and repeated the word out loud, finding that it vaguely echoed around in him. "Cluster-fuck."

Die stayed where he was for a moment, his head bowed, hair falling around his face. This was all so very fucked up. When Kyo voiced the single word, he could only agree, sighing as he finally straightened up and then went to his little kit, starting to get it straightened up and put away for another day.

Kyo stayed still for a few more minutes then he couldn't stand it anymore. He sat up, ignoring the pain in his gut. He stood, wobbled a bit then regained his balance before basically stumbling over to Die, knocking the kit out of his hands. "Die, stop. Stop it. Stop... bottling up." He started feeling oddly angry and he pushed at Die's shoulder. "Let it out! Yell at me! I know... Daisuke... I-I know... you can't stand it..."

The moment that Kyo was beside him, knocking the kit out of his hands, things scattering on the floor, he felt like he'd been punched in the face. His hands shook, his breath hitching. This wasn't his Kyo... this wasn't happening. 

He sighed softly and closed his eyes, just letting Kyo push at him and yell. After a moment, he reached out and completely by feel, found Kyo's wrist, holding onto it as he opened his eyes and stared right into his lover's eyes. "Can't stand what? That you're yelling at me because you think I should be exploding? Yeah... that part, I can't stand, you're right. But you know what? The rest of this... I... I've always been the one to help you, Kyo. It's always been my place, and this is no different. It's just that I should have been paying more attention. I should have known things were getting this bad. I thought I could fix it, that I could help you by pushing past my own limits and making each and every line for you. But the truth of it is... it's not something I can do for you. And I see that now. That's where I messed up, thinking I could take control of the whole situation and taking that on myself when I just needed to be the support, not the implement."

Kyo felt sick to his stomach. All he could hear was Die blaming himself over and over. How could he get him to understand that it wasn't his fault? Yelling hadn't done it and had only hurt his throat. He shook his head and wrenched his wrist free only to reach out and grab Die by the shoulders, shaking him. "Why? Why do you feel it's your 'place'? You don't... owe me anything... but I-I owe you my _life_ , my very sanity... everything." He choked a bit, swallowing over the lump in his throat before continuing. "My everything... you are... my life... and I'm sorry... so, so sorry."

Die reached out, framing Kyo's face gently with his hands. "Because I love you. When you love someone as much and for as long as I have... you set expectations for yourself. I have made it my place, Kyo. It's a choice. Maybe I don't owe you jack of shit, but that's not the point. And if you owe me those things... well that just means I'm doing my job right." He leaned in and gently kissed him on the lips before pulling back. "Now stop straining your voice or the doctor really will kill me."

Kyo stared at Die as he spoke, clarity visiting him again as Die touched his face. He took several deep breaths before kissing Die back then slumping forward, all of the energy and fight draining from him at once. "I don't deserve you," he whispered softly, clinging to him tightly. "Forgive me."

Die gently kissed the top of Kyo's head, holding him close as he rested his cheek there. "You rate yourself too low, baby. You deserve so much more than I could ever give you. But... for what it's worth, I forgive you for scaring the shit out of me."

Kyo didn't argue the point any more even though, if was honest with himself and Die, he felt like the lowest piece of scum on Earth for having hurt Die so much. He slipped his arm around his lover and held onto him tightly as his world slowly fell back into place. 

Die stroked one soothing hand over Kyo's back, waiting on his lover to get himself sorted out once more. Eventually, he got Kyo back on the couch and the IV bag back up and draped over the top of it again. 

It was almost twenty minutes later when the doctor finally came back, lightly knocking before entering the apartment. He handed Die a little bag with a pill bottle and then one to Kyo as well. "I noticed you were low on the anxiety pills, Daisuke, so I got those as well. Your change is in the bag." He gently touched Kyo's shoulder. "Are you doing okay or should I look at the wound again?"

Kyo looked up as the doctor spoke to him and shook his head. "It's fine... thank you for coming." He looked a little embarrassed, unable to meet the doctor's eyes. The fact that he'd done this to himself made him feel ashamed even though he'd done this sort of thing before, just not as severely. Maybe that's what made the difference. 

The doctor nodded and then squeezed Kyo's shoulder a little. "Let me know after a week how the pills are working for you, okay? There's a lot we can try if they aren't doing what they should be. So don't think you have to be miserable."

Die gave him a little thankful look and shifted to start cleaning up his own kit as the doctor gathered his own. He sanitized the needle with the lighter in the little case and then put everything back where it belonged, zipping it up.

Kyo simply nodded then moved to sit on the couch, watching both of them clean up the mess he was responsible for. He gave a sigh and leaned back, closing his eyes. It wasn't a minute before he was sound asleep, body going slack and soft snores issuing from him. 

The doctor left with a few words of advice to Die, Die taking his and Kyo's pills to the bathroom and quietly adding Kyo's to his vitamin caddy so he'd just take them in the mornings when he was supposed to. He put the bottles in the cabinet, dumping the old portion of his anti-anxiety pills into the new container and then using the restroom and washing up. He came back out, unhooked Kyo from the IV and then settled down in his armchair, watching Kyo sleep, not wanting to disturb him by moving him around. 

What seemed like hours later, Kyo woke again, feeling much more in his right mind. He shifted and let out a small groan of pain as his stitches pulled slightly. He looked around and spotted Die on the armchair and stood up, ignoring the weakness he felt as he moved over to the other and curled up in his lap, kissing the side of his mouth and down his jaw, just wanting intimate contact with his lover. 

Die had managed to doze off at some point, but only very lightly. The sound of Kyo moving at all had Die wide awake again and he watched as Kyo moved over to him, crawling into his lap and curling up there. He slid his arms around his waist and held on, his thumbs lightly rubbing over the skin there.

Kyo smiled slightly as Die's arms came around him. He took it a bit further, moving to nuzzle at Die's neck, peppering the skin there with light kisses. "I miss being with you," he whispered against Die's ear. 

Die swallowed a little, the kisses and the words doing things to him that it probably shouldn't have, especially with how exhausted he was. But the truth was, being interrupted the way he had been, it was killer on his nerves. He just made sure Kyo was in a good place to not end up getting poked, one hand trailing up Kyo's back to gently rub there. "I'm sorry I get up in the middle of the night... it's just difficult to sleep." He frowned a little. "And I don't want to disturb you by flailing all over the place."

Kyo shook his head, shifting a bit and pressing his lips to Die's. "Why is it hard to sleep? Is it me?" He stroked a hand over the other's chest softly. 

"It's a lot of things. You know how I get... I just don't want to use any sleeping pills. And I've been trying not to drink myself to sleep, so..." he shrugged a little. "Hello insomnia!"

Kyo gave him a pinched look, then moved again, leaning in to kiss Die hard on the mouth. "I don't want you to have insomnia... and I don't want you to suffer alone." He looked at Die, reached up to cup his face as he continued whispering. "In any way...."

Die offered the other a soft smile after the kiss, his hand still idly stroking his lover's back. "You need your rest, so don't you dare stay up just because of me." He lightly kissed Kyo's forehead, then his nose, and then gently on his lips before he leaned back in his chair again. "I love you."

Kyo leaned into Die's touch then sighed, nodding slightly. "I love you, too." He shifted to against Die's chest, staying still for a moment before biting his lip as a thought occurred to him. He glanced up at Die's face then reached down, pressing his hand against Die's crotch lightly. 

Of all the things Die had been expecting, this surely wasn't one of them. The moment Kyo's hand touched his cock he reacted like he'd never been touched before. His body jerked, his shoulders hunching forward a bit, his breath whooshing out of him along with a surprised grunt. Beneath Kyo's hand he was already partially hard, much to his embarrassment. He could feel his chest tighten as he tried hard not to shift toward Kyo's touch. It was humiliating... to be aroused like this while his lover had just damn near bled out all over the fucking house, and here he was a few hours later with a raging hard-on again. Timing was clearly not his forte. He turned his head away, trying to hide his shame.

Kyo smiled faintly at Die's reaction. He knew the other had been on edge and he was only proven correct when he found Die half-hard. He moved around and got Die's pants out of the way, freeing his length and started to stroke it. He leaned in to press his lips to Die's cheek, murmuring, "It's okay..."

Die let out a choked sort of sob when Kyo started to touch him, freeing him of his pants and pressing his hand to his overheated flesh. He did the only thing he could at that point and closed his eyes, hoping like hell he wasn't going to fully embarrass himself.

Kyo shifted to press his lips against Die's neck, moving his hand a little faster, feeling Die practically throbbing in his hand. He knew the other needed this and had for a while and he was all too happy to help him. 

A long, thin whine escaped Die's throat a few moments later, his hips finally pushing up as he was unable to hold it back any longer. One hand slid down to grab at Kyo's waistband, holding on tight. His jaw clenched and he turned his head fully away from Kyo, utterly ashamed of the feelings flooding through him right then. It wasn't even a few more seconds before his hips jerked harshly, a strangled sort of cry coming from his lips as he started to cum, thick spurts of it shooting out across Kyo's hand and arm, some of it all over his own pants. He came hard enough his stomach muscles were quivering and his mind went blank for a few blissful seconds. For a moment, he sincerely forgot how to breathe, finally gasping for air a moment after he finished.

Kyo watched as Die came undone, copious amounts of fluid coating his hand and landing on his arm and Die's pants. Even in this odd situation, Kyo found him beautiful as he found his bliss. "You're gorgeous..."

Die made a few tiny strangled sounds, his face going slightly red as he realized how quickly he'd cum and how very much he'd needed this. It seemed like everything about his sexuality was coming unraveled. First the incident with Nora and his and Kyo's pants and then the porn... now this. He supposed one didn't notice how much they needed sexual contact until they were denied it for so long. 

But honestly, he couldn't bother Kyo with it while he was healing. Aside from the fact that everything he did these days he was ashamed of, feeling like he was sneaking around and hiding it all. Without Kyo knowing, he'd gotten rid of most of his porn collection and a good chunk of his old toys, despite there not being all that much that'd he'd even brought with him when he'd moved in.

But having them around just seemed to taunt him and he couldn't take it. The less he showed himself anything sexual, the less he wanted it. So it was an effective tool, at least. Until he'd gotten ahold of his laptop and the damned internet, that was.

He slid his hand down to hold Kyo's wrist, his eyes closed and his breathing slowly returning to normal.  
Kyo watched Die's face and read it like a book. The shame written on it was clear as day. He pulled his hand away and licked his lips, hesitating before finally whispering out his thoughts. "Die... what is it? Why are you... why have you been denying yourself? You look... guilty." 

Die's heart ached in his chest at the very idea of Kyo being able to figure him out so well. He frowned a little and did his best to face him, swallowing the lump in his throat as he did. "I..." he shook his head. "It's... just personal issues. I'll work them out..." How could he tell Kyo he was freaking out over his own sexuality like a goddamned teenager? It just wasn't right.

Kyo raised an eyebrow at Die's answer then placed his hand on his chest. "No, Die, nothing is 'personal' between us anymore. You can't... you can't hide this from me." He frowned, staring hard at Die. 

Die winced a little and shifted, uncomfortable that he was still bared to the world while talking about this. Quietly, he reached to get some tissues and wiped himself and Kyo's hand up, then did up his pants and tossed the tissue in the trash beside the chair.

With that done, he sighed softly and leaned back in the chair, reaching to push one hand through his hair. There was no way to actually say this... to get it out there correctly. He frowned a little and just shook his head. "I don't know what to say, Kyo."

Kyo let Die clean them up then looked at him as he spoke. He sighed softly and stood up, ignoring the dizziness he felt. "Well... what is it? Is it me? Is it you? What?" He bit his lip. "Die, you threw out your porn collection... and don't think I didn't notice. Why?"

Die's heart jumped as Kyo got up, afraid he was fucking everything up just because he couldn't get a grip on himself. When Kyo asked if it was him, he immediately let out, "Gods no!" a terrified look on his face. It had never been Kyo's fault and never would be. He reached to run one hand over his face as Kyo continued on. So much for discretion. Maybe Kyo used some of his stuff once in a while and noticed when he went to get it. Who knew. Either way, this wasn't good, not at all.

He shifted uncomfortably. "I... I feel like... you know when you were a kid and you got your first wet dream? And you thought for sure you'd somehow done something wrong?"

Kyo stared at Die somewhat incredulously. He hadn't felt that particular feeling since he was some eleven years old. "Yeah...? Vaguely... You feel... wrong... for being turned on?"

Die crossed one leg over the other, trying to get his thoughts to straighten out enough to get his point across. "It's... it's just similar to that. Like I feel like I'm sneaking around and like when I get caught, the world is ending." He pushed one hand up into his hair. "If I'm going to be honest, it started because Nora found our clothes. The fact that she knows my biggest secret... I just... I can't even look at her in the eyes anymore, Kyo. I know she's not judging me, but I feel like she is anyway. Like the whole world knows now that she does. So I've eliminated that particular aspect completely. But it doesn't help. I just keep taking things away, praying one of them will end this feeling... and it doesn't."

Kyo frowned and sat down on the edge of the coffee table, running his hand through his hair. He didn't know what to say that would help Die. He felt partly responsible though because he'd been just as big a part of that particular incident as Die had. "What about... tonight? Were you feeling that way? I mean before I ruined it..."

Die shifted a little, clearly uncomfortable with the entire conversation, but determined to keep having it anyway. "Yeah... I was. Like I was doing something I shouldn't have been... ashamed that I even needed to. But god... it's been so long and it just gets to that point where it actually physically _hurts_. I just couldn't take it anymore, so I gave in." He stared down at his hands, trying to keep his focus on them and not on how horrible he felt right then talking about this.

Kyo didn't know what to say. Die seemed to be suffering on a deep psychological level and he wasn't sure he could fix it. He sat there for a moment before turning and picking up Die's phone. Flipping quickly through the contacts, he found Nora's number and selected it before holding it out to Die. "Call her. Talk to her. Resolve this and put your mind at ease."

Die stared at him like he was growing a second head from his shoulders. If he hadn't just taken a pill a few hours earlier he was certain he'd be freaking out right then. But the phone was already ringing and he couldn't not do this. The moment he reached out, he heard Nora pick up, a note of worry to her voice. "Die?"

He stared at Kyo and then murmured softly, "Can... can I have a minute?" He put the phone to his ear and quietly offered, "Hi..."

Kyo nodded and stood, making his way to the kitchen. He looked at the tea kettle then shook his head and opened the freezer, pulling out a bottle of Southern Comfort they'd brought back from the US. He busied himself pouring a shot, knocking it back then taking another before getting a glass and filling it about half full with the amber liquid then topping it with Coke. He took his drink and sat at the table, sipping it slowly.

Nora had been rather surprised to hear from Die at this hour and assumed the worst. "Die... what's going on?"

Die sat there for a moment, not knowing at all how to start this conversation. It would surely be the worst of his adult life; that was for certain. He took a deep breath and then murmured, "Kyo insisted I call. I've... I've been having some issues. It's not anything medical, I promise. Though, Kyo had some issues earlier, but we'll get to that in a moment."

Nora hummed softly and decided she'd better make herself some tea. She had an idea what Die's problem was about, but she wasn't going to force it out him. Making her way out of bed, she headed for her kitchen and started water to boiling. "Okay, so... what's up?"

Die closed his eyes and just bit the bullet. It was going to hurt no matter what, so it may as well be done with. "When you found my clothes... on the bus... I just... everything... I... god." He let out a little sound of frustration. "Do you think I'm disgusting?"

Nora listened to what Die had to say then let out a soft sigh. Yes, she had known exactly what had gone on when she'd found that bag of clothes. The truth was, she had known for quite a while about Die's fetish, but would never call him out on it and embarrass him. "No, Die, I do not think you're disgusting. Everyone has their... quirks. I mean, how many times do you think I've walked in on Kyo while he's bleeding or Kaoru trying to hide a gay porn mag?" She let out a little laugh. "Or even Shinya with God knows whatever that furry thing was." 

Die started to open his mouth again, completely embarrassed by the fact that she obviously knew it wasn't just an accident. But that was completely overwhelmed for a second by what on earth she was talking about with Shinya and a furry thing. Their drummer had a freaky secret, too? If nothing else, that made him feel a little better.

He calmed down a little and swallowed back some of his anxiety before he spoke again. "I just... I honestly... didn't think anyone else would find them. I was going to deal with my own mess, myself. I swear to you I'd never make you do such a thing again."

Nora cradled the phone with her shoulder and poured her tea, taking a sip of it before smiling a little. "You boys are like my children, Die. You make messes, I clean them up. It doesn't matter if it's blood, piss, vomit or other unsavory things. It's my job, sweetie. Though I do appreciate the consideration." She paused then continued. "I do have a word of advice though. Next time, double bag it. The smell was fairly strong, which is how I found them."

Die winced a little at the comment and then let out a soft, "Ah... sorry." He took in a deep breath and then let it out. "It's okay, though... I promise there won't be a next time on that one." He could hear Kyo rattling around in the kitchen and he lowered his voice a little. "But... on the Kyo front, just to let you know, he's having some issues with this whole voice thing. Some old habits are... worse than before, if you get my drift." He didn't want to outright say it and certainly wasn't going to tell her he'd been given pills, but he had to tell her something at least. She was like their mother and for god's sake, you told your mother if someone was having a hard go of it.

Nora sat down at her kitchen bar and frowned slightly at the news about Kyo. She had walked in on some pretty bad nights where the vocalist had passed out in a pool of his own blood. Die usually handled it, but she'd had to be there a few times too. "How bad is it? Is he... alright?" She knew Kyo couldn't be completely okay with everything, but at least maybe Die could keep him mostly sane.

Die sighed softly. "I honestly don't know anymore. I thought I was helping him deal well with it, but I guess I wasn't. It needed stitches and a doctor visit."

Nora winced slightly and huffed. "That Kyo... he always takes things too far... but at least he's patched up for the moment." She sipped her tea and thought for a moment before speaking again. "Die, don't let this be a burden on you. If you need help, call me... or at least call someone. Okay?"

"Yeah... I... Nora, honestly, I need help. I feel like I'm failing horribly some nights. Maybe... you can come to dinner once a week and just... help a little? I don't even know how, but a set day I can just focus on... me... for a little while..." He felt ashamed to have to ask for it, but he knew it wasn't good he was pushing himself away either.

She listened, tapping her fingers on the counter idly. "Of course. I can come over and do whatever you need me to do. Since you guys aren't on tour right now, I'm not as busy. And I've heard that you're having your panic attacks again so... you really need to take care of yourself. For you _and_ him."

Die pursed his lips a little and then sighed. "Who told you?" He didn't really mind that they had, he was just curious who else knew besides him and Kyo.

Nora clucked her tongue. "Kyo emailed me after you had the first one. He wanted to know what he should do if you started having one." 

Die let out a small sound showing that he'd heard her. He cleared his throat and then murmured, "Well... I'm sorry to have woken you up and everything. But um... Wednesdays?"

She grabbed her appointment book, glancing over it before answering. "Wednesdays work fine... but please don't wait to call me if something goes wrong, okay? You know I care a lot about you both and I know that I and the rest of the band need you two to be healthy and happy."

Die let out a soft hum. "I know and I appreciate it." He pushed one hand through his hair again. "So... sleep well and for what it's worth... I'm still sorry you had to deal with... that."

Nora chuckled softly and finished her tea, moving to set the cup in the sink. "Anytime, hon. Now go get some rest, yeah? I'll be in touch next Wednesday. Goodnight." With that, she hung up and headed back to bed. 

Kyo heard Die hang up the phone and finally made his way out to the living room with two cups of Comfort and Coke, offering one to Die then curling up on the couch, sipping his own as he peered at his lover. 

Die accepted the drink from Kyo, sniffing it and then taking a drink, looking vaguely surprised at the alcohol. He moved to sit next to Kyo. He pulled his legs up and rested his cup on his knee. "She knew."

Kyo nodded silently, reaching over to rub Die's shoulder. "I figured..."

He reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose and then took a rather large drink from his glass. "I... I'm still not okay with this. I'm really not. I just can't get over how... horrible it is." He leaned his head back on the couch and closed his eyes. "When you were coming out from under and you had to... you know. I had to work so hard not to be aroused by the situation. And if that's not fucked up, I have no idea what is."

Kyo watched Die, frowning. He slid his hand off his shoulder and wrapped his arm around his knees, downing half of his glass. "Why, Die? What makes it any more fucked up than getting aroused from say... watching your blood spill from your body? Or being tied up while someone uses you?" He glanced at Die then sighed. What could he even say to make Die see that it was okay?

Die looked over at him, something unreadable in his eyes. When he looked away again, he sighed deeply. "You were doped up like shit and probably in intense pain, and I was getting a fucking boner off it. Not okay."

Kyo finished off his drink, setting the cup down. "Fine, that wasn't okay. Even though it was an unusual situation and you can't help what turns you on." He sighed, feeling at a loss on this whole thing. He just wanted Die to be fine with everything again.

Die put his head back on the couch again, staring at the ceiling. "You know what's truly fucked up? It's like I jacked up my entire sexuality over this whole thing. I'm scared of everything now. Like what if I get caught? What if this is weird too? I can't think or do anything without the nagging feeling what I'm doing is so very fucking wrong ."

Kyo closed his eyes, head slightly spinning from the alcohol and earlier events. He reached out, about to touch Die's leg, but then stopped, pulling his hand back. "I...don't know what to say, Die. I don't. I'm clueless."

Die shifted forward, putting his head on his knees and just holding his glass in front of them, ring clinking on the glass. "I just need to get past it. But, the trouble is, with you still healing, it's... it's like a war between my libido and my brain knowing we can't do things yet."

Kyo looked at Die then bit his lip before reaching out and slapping the glass out of Die's hand, forcing his knees down and straddling his lap. "Touch me... now." 

Die looked almost panicked for a second. But he let Kyo move him around, settling his hands on Kyo's hips, unsure of where this was going. But then again maybe it would be good for him to at least get Kyo off. Nothing too vigorous or anything. Especially now that he had stitches. But still... the doctor had told him nothing too exciting for Kyo for a while and he still hadn't cleared anything yet and that made Die nervous. He spared one glance at the spilled half a drink on the floor, then dismissed it in favor of pulling Kyo closer to him, tucking him against his chest and sliding his hands up his back, letting himself enjoy the feeling of those muscles under his fingers.

Kyo sighed softly as Die's hands finally touched him and pulled him close. He tilted his head up and nuzzled into Die's neck before kissing and licking along his collarbone. He didn't leave it at that though, shifting forward and pushing his hips against Die's, ignoring the pain he felt from his wound. 

Die let out a tiny whimper, shivering slightly as Kyo moved closer to him and started pushing against him in more intimate ways. "Baby," he whispered softly. "Just... just don't get too vigorous, the doctor, ah!" Kyo shifted just the right way, pressing his ass down against his dick and it made him immediately want to be in that tight heat.

Kyo lifted his head and placed his finger over Die's lips before leaning down and kissing him hard, forcing his tongue into his lover's mouth as he continued squirming in his lap. He wasn't even thinking at this point, just going on what he needed and right then he _needed_ Die. 

Die let out a whine, arching up toward him. He slid his hands back down to Kyo's hips, already starting to get hard again. "K-Kyo," he choked out, bucking up a little. "Fuck."

Getting impatient, Kyo leaned back and tugged Die's shirt off, scraping his nails down his chest then sliding off his lap long enough to strip out of his own clothes, baring himself completely to Die. "Take me, please... please, Die. I need you so badly," he pleaded, reaching down stroke his hand over his already half-hard cock. 

Die looked up at him, seeing the other and how he was stripping out of his clothing. His excitement welled up inside him and he felt like he was going to burst just looking at the other naked in front of him. After a short moment, he pushed himself up from the sofa and moved to gently take Kyo's arm, steering him toward the bedroom.

Kyo almost groaned at the hungry look in Die's eyes, a look he hadn't seen in a long time. He gladly let the other lead him to the bedroom, going and laying back on Die's portion of the bed as soon as they were in there, taking his cock in hand and giving it a few strokes, letting out a hoarse cry. 

Die immediately started to get his pants open, pushing them down the moment he had them unfastened. A moment later, he was on the bed, crawling over Kyo, his eyes full of lust.

Kyo grabbed Die and pulled him down, kissing him hard, arching his hips up and pressing against him with a quiet moan. He clung to Die's shoulders, panting slightly, his pain, everything forgotten except his need for Die. 

Die shifted between his legs, unable to even think about anything but how good it would feel to have Kyo again after so long. "I want you every fucking day... it's been so hard." He shifted away enough to get a bottle of lube from the drawer. He popped it open and quickly slathered himself up, using the extra to coat his fingers, slipping down to press them against Kyo's entrance, pushing one in with a groan.

Kyo let out a soft sound as Die's finger entered him, the fit tight after so long. "Oh god, baby..." He shifted and spread his legs, showing Die all he had to offer. "Don't wait... just... do it... please..." He couldn't even think straight, his hands grappling at Die's shoulders, scratching the skin there, his cock fully hard now and straining against his stomach. 

Die huffed out a little breath. "No, I'll do it right..." He pulled out the single finger and pressed in a second one. 

Kyo just nodded, letting out another little cry as Die's fingers pushed into him, stretching him further. He bucked against them some, sliding his hand down Die's arm as his body gave a shudder. "I love you." 

"I love you, too... I love you so very much." He let out a quiet moan as he fucked Kyo with those fingers. It took him only a few more moments before he had Kyo fully stretched. He shifted forward and positioned himself, pushing into the other's body with a loud groan of pleasure, the tight heat feeling utterly amazing.

Kyo writhed against Die's hand and moaned at the loss of it. He reached out and held onto Die as the other pushed into his body, filling him, making him cry out in a broken voice. The pleasure of it was almost too much and he felt like bursting just being joined with Die like this. 

Die let out a strained moan, having to stay still for a moment to get used to how tight Kyo was around him. He shifted his position a little to get better leverage, starting to thrust into him as he curled one arm around his body, the other hand reaching down to grasp Kyo's cock, starting to gently stroke him. "Oh gods... oh Kyo!"

Kyo whimpered as Die started moving, the sound turning into a moan when he began stroking his aching length. "I... Oh God... yes... Dai~!" He ignored all the pain he was feeling from his throat and wound, bending his body up to cling to Die as he rolled his hips to meet his thrusts. 

Die couldn't have stopped if he wanted to. It was like joining with Kyo for the first time all over again; the desperation, the pure intensity of it. Perhaps it was even more than that first time now, knowing what he'd been missing and craving. His hips moved faster, his hand a blur over Kyo's cock.

Kyo could barely catch his breath, the intensity was so great. All he could do was hold on for the ride as Die thrust into him. He choked out a strangled sob as Die brushed over his prostate, his eyes squeezing shut as his cock throbbed in Die's hand. "Oh... Gods!" He wasn't going to last much longer, there was no way he could hold it back, not now, not like this. "Die!" 

Die shifted a little, almost mindlessly searching for someplace to settle his lips. Finally he found a patch of skin just under Kyo's tattoo and he set to sucking on it like it was his lifeline, unconcerned with how it'd leave a mark. They weren't in the public eye right then anyway... or at least Kyo wasn't at all. 

Feeling Die marking him proved to be too much and Kyo's back snapped up as he started to cum. He let out a hoarse cry of Die's name as spurt after spurt of hot, sticky fluid spilled out onto Die's hand and his stomach and chest, his body shuddering violently as he was thrown into white hot bliss. 

Die let out a loud moan at the feeling of Kyo cumming, the pulse of his body around his cock something he'd missed far too much. He threw back his head and cried out, hips pounding his cock into the other's body as he started to cum.

Kyo felt like heaven on earth as Die started filling him. He gave a soft moan, shuddering slightly, his mind completely full of pleasure. "Die... Gods... love you."

Something wouldn't let Die stop thrusting into the other, even well after he'd cum, the pleasure far too much for him, his cries proving it as he pushed into him, but he kept going, his body shaking from the effort of it, arms clutching at the other.

Kyo cried out as Die thrust into his overly sensitive body. He looked up into Die's face before rolling his hips and clenching down around him, whimpering softly. 

It only took him a few more thrusts before he came a second time, something of a grunt coming from his throat as he came to a dead stop, his cock spurting his offering into Kyo's body. After a few seconds, he slipped out and collapsed to the side, narrowly avoiding the blood stains from earlier, sweaty and almost delirious with pleasure.

Kyo groaned lowly as Die came for the second time, shivering a little. He held onto him until he stopped and fell to the side. He could feel the cum leaking from his body but ignored it in favor of turning and placing several kisses to Die's face. "Ah baby... I love you... Gods I love you so much."

Die lay there, trying desperately to catch his breath, his cheeks pink with his effort. "I love you, too, Kyo," he whispered out, licking his lips after a moment and reaching one arm to pull Kyo close. "Are... are you okay? I mean, the doctor said not to..."

Kyo shifted and leaned into Die, letting out a breath. "Hurts a little, but I'm fine... I promise... you did most of the work." He gave Die a soft smile, reaching up to stroke his hair. 

Die nodded a little and soft of collapsed against his pillow. "I... I just didn't know how much he meant about not working you up. It doesn't really make sense that we can't... just... maybe because if I work you up too much you'd make sounds?"

Kyo laughed a little, burying his face against Die's chest. "I guess so... it's hard not to... I mean, I'll be honest... my throat is raw now... but it was so worth it." 

Die flushed a little and gently shifted Kyo so he could look at his side, making sure he wasn't bleeding from his wound. Once he was sure that it was fine, he collapsed back down on the bed again, feeling completely exhausted. Maybe this was what he'd needed to sleep, because now he felt almost overwhelmed with the need.

Kyo shifted and got comfortable, running his hand over Die's side. He could tell he was about to pass out and he found himself smiling, leaning in to lightly kiss Die's lips before closing his own eyes, sighing as his body relaxed. 

It didn't take but a few seconds for Die to sink into sleep. He let out a soft little sigh and a moment later, he was gone.

\---

Kyo sat in the examination room for what felt like the millionth time as the doctor looked down his throat, felt around his lymph nodes and thoroughly examined his overall health. He kept looking at Die with what amounted to a pouty expression, completely fed up with this by now. 

Die sat quietly in the chair in the corner of the office, watching Kyo get poked and prodded once again. It was a weekly occurrence now and he knew the other was probably beyond frustrated with it. But hopefully things were coming along better now and with luck he'd get put back to where he would be getting actual vocal therapy, not these stupid sessions where they had him make strange sounds.

The doctor finally removed his instrument from Kyo's throat and smiled at him, picking up his chart. "Kyo, you're healing quite nicely now. It seems Daisuke has done a fair job taking care of you." He turned and gave Die a little wink then cleared his throat. "I'm going to go ahead and clear you for advanced vocal therapy, including singing. Go easy, take it slow. I know you're impatient, but it will be worth it."

Kyo resisted the urge to huff as the doctor pulled away from him. His irritability was squashed however when he was told that he could finally start singing again. "Ah, thank you. It will be... a relief to get back to it..." He turned and smiled at Die, feeling a little giddy. 

Die perked up at the mention of Kyo getting approval to sing again. He felt like a huge weight was lifted off of him now, most of his burden released in one single moment of time. He beamed at Kyo when he turned to look at him. "That's great news!"

The doctor smiled at them both and nodded. "Yes, I'm sure you and your bandmates are ready to get back at it. Just, like I said, take it easy. I'm going to write a prescription for Prednisone to help keep inflammation down." He wrote it out and handed the script the Kyo. "We're done for the day. I expect to see you in two weeks to make sure the singing is going alright." With that, he bowed to them both and left the room.

Kyo took his prescription then waited for the doctor to leave before hopping off the table and grinning widely at Die. "Thank Gods!"

Die stood up as the doctor left, quietly thanking him. He came to Kyo and pulled him into a quick hug. "Finally," he breathed out. "Come on, let's go get sandwiches to celebrate. I'll call them in... for all of us and you text the others. This calls for an official meeting."

Kyo hugged Die back tightly and nodded, pulling out his phone and sending a mass text to Kaoru, Toshiya and Shinya. _"Official meeting, our place, 30 mins. There will be food."_

Die quickly called in orders for Rubins all around, three huge orders of fries on the side, and a jug of iced green tea. He gestured Kyo to come after him, heading out to the car and unlocking it. He rarely got to drive and he was glad he had today, given the good news.

Kyo happily followed Die to the car, feeling like a weight was gone off of his chest. He could sing again! It meant he could finally be _himself_ again.

Die started the car and then chanced something he never had in broad daylight. He figured his car windows were tinted enough that they'd be fine. He leaned over and gently turned Kyo's face toward him and laid one on him real well, even groaning faintly into the kiss. When he pulled back, he just gave him a huge smile and then pulled out of the parking space, heading toward the sandwich shop.

Kyo had just buckled his seat belt when Die kissed him. He let out a soft sound of surprise then grinned back at Die. "What was that for?" 

"Because I'm so fucking happy, that's why." He made his way through the streets, the traffic light because he knew which streets to stay away from. "It's like this huge weight is gone from our shoulders."

Kyo chuckled softly and nodded, leaning back in the seat. He couldn't seem to wipe the grin from his face, he was so damn relieved. "Yeah, this is... this is great. I just can't even wrap my head around it yet!" He laughed and reached out, squeezing Die's thigh. 

Die glanced over at him, his eyes filled with pure delight. "Baby... god, I'm so happy right now."

Kyo waited until they stopped at a light then leaned over and kissed Die's cheek. "I am too... but maybe more than that... I'm just so relieved."

Die nodded. "I just... these past few months have been pure and utter hell." He drove the last few blocks to the sandwich shop and parked in the five minute parking out front. He turned to Kyo and looked him right in the eyes. "You realize something though? If we survived this... our relationship... we can survive anything."

Kyo nodded slightly, running his hands through his hair. It had been hell in more ways than one. For him and for Die and for them as a couple, but Die was right. It was like they could survive anything. He reached out and cupped Die's cheek. "I have no doubt about that... none at all." 

Die turned his head and gently kissed Kyo's palm before he pulled back. "Sandwiches!" He slid out of the car and rushed inside, going to get their call-ahead order. He came back out in less than five minutes with two huge bags and a jug of tea. He handed them in to Kyo and then got in, quickly buckling up and pulling back out into traffic. "Call Nora... and Rick."

Kyo waited while Die ran to get their order, getting replies from all three of their bandmates that they'd be there. When Die came back, he took the food and tea and settled it at his feet. "It's the middle of the night in the US... I'll call Rick later." He took out his phone and called Nora though, quickly telling her the news. He found himself grinning all over again as she gave a cry of happiness and told him that she was so happy for him. When he finally hung up, they were almost to their place. "She's delighted." 

Die reached over and squeezed Kyo's thigh gently. "I figure we'll leave Inoue to Kaoru. He'll be happy to be able to tell someone himself." He made the last turn into their parking garage and made his way up four floors to park the car. He cut the engine and glanced around. Seeing no one, he unbuckled and slid over onto Kyo's lap, gently framing his face with his hands and giving him the most tender of kisses, drawing it out for quite some time.

Kyo nodded in agreement. "Yeah, he'll get to do his leader duties." He laughed but cut it short when Die slid into his lap. Giving a faint groan, he wrapped his arms around him and held him close as they kissed, happily returning it with one of his own. 

Die kissed him until he started to feel the desire well up inside him for more than that. He pulled back and bit his lower lip, a faint flush of arousal painting his cheeks. "I'll make good on that later tonight, I swear it." He opened the door and slipped out of the car, grabbing the food except the tea jug, leaving that for Kyo.

Kyo almost pouted when Die pulled away but was mollified with the promise of later. "Oh fine..." He reached down and got the tea, slipping out of the car and shutting the door.

Die chuckled softly. "Mmm... never said when later was, did I?" He headed for the elevators then, a satisfied look on his face and a bounce to his step that had been long absent.

Kyo narrowed his eyes, huffing at Die's teasing. He followed him to the elevator, catching up to him and pinching his ass with a smirk. "Brat."

Once inside the elevator, Die backed Kyo up into a corner and smirked at him. "Guess what?"

Kyo looked up at Die, eyebrow raised, his free hand coming up to rest on Die's chest. "What?" 

"There's no cameras in here." He reached back and hit the emergency stop button before slipping down to his knees and putting the sandwiches aside. He smirked up at Kyo as he reached to begin undoing his pants. "No holding back, this has to be fast."

Kyo opened his mouth to ask what that had to do with anything, but stopped short as Die stopped the elevator and got on his knees. "Oh... God..." He reached down to pet Die's hair lightly, nodding a bit, his length already hardening just from the idea. 

Die licked his lips as he unzipped Kyo's jeans and pulled his boxers down, watching his cock spring out. "Fuck, baby... already hard?" He shifted closer, working up a bit of spit in his mouth before he leaned in and just engulfed all of him at once. With a lewd groan, he began bobbing his head over his cock, giving the blowjob everything he had, eager to please Kyo as much as he possibly could.

Kyo smirked. "Always hard for you, Die." He licked his lips, watching Die then letting out a groan, his fingers instantly tightening in his hair as his entire cock was wrapped in wet heat. "Oh... _fuck_!" It felt amazing. 

Die worked over Kyo's length better than any whore could have possibly done, loving every second of that thick cock in between his lips. He flicked his tongue over the head and then went right back down. His hands quickly undid his own belt, freeing his cock and starting to jerk himself off quick and hard, the sound of what they were doing distinct in the small space.

Kyo grunted as Die worked him, his hips pushing forward a bit, his hand tugging a handful of Die's hair. He glanced down as he heard Die's pants coming undone and groaned, something about his lover jerking himself off with a mouthful of dick was incredibly hot to him. "Ah, yes... so good..." 

Die shifted into a more comfortable position, his belt jingling as he jerked himself off faster, trying to match his pace over Kyo's dick as well, little moans and groans slipping free of his mouth as he did.

Kyo let his head drop back as he moaned, his cock throbbing in Die's mouth. "Fuck..." He slipped his other hand under his shirt, finding and tugging a nipple, letting out a lewd moan as he did. It wasn't but another half minute before he was crying out as he came, spilling into Die's mouth and down his throat. 

The moment Kyo's load hit his tongue, Die knew he was done for. He swallowed it down at the same moment he let out his own spurt of cum all over the floor. He came so hard he had to use the wall behind Kyo for support, not slowing down his touches until he was fully finished, swallowing the last few drops of Kyo's cum as he pulled back and stared up at him with a stupid grin on his face. "Fuck is right."

Kyo stared down at Die, panting as he recovered, giving a little laugh. "You're amazing." He reached down, stroking Die's hair, smirking. "And so damn sexy with my cum on your lips..." 

Die smirked softly and licked his lips to get the rest of the cum off them. He got to his feet and quickly tucked himself back in, doing up his pants and trying to get his hair back in order and look at least a little innocent. "I've been wanting to do that since we got together." He winked at Kyo as he picked up the bags and hit the button so they'd move again. 

Kyo laughed softly then waited until they were moving again to pull Die to him, kissing him hard and passionately. "What took you so long?" 

"I was waiting for the right moment." He gave him a smile. "This moment."

Kyo slipped his arms around Die and hugged him tightly. He let go just as the lift stopped. He bent down to pick up the tea and smiled as he stepped off the elevator. "You're wonderful, you know that?" 

Die beamed at him. "And so are you." He stepped out and headed toward their apartment, seeing the others waiting in the hallway in front of their place. Die quickly let them all inside, ditched his shoes and took everything into the living room, settling down and starting to put out the food.

Kyo grinned and waved at the others, following them all in and going to grab plates and plastic cups for the tea. 

Kaoru sat down next to Die and helped him put the sandwiches out. He scooted closer and leaned over. "Er... you might... want to go check your pants in the bathroom," he murmured softly.

Die looked down and noticed the still wet cum splattered across one leg and immediately shoved the bag in Kaoru's hand, getting up and heading to the bedroom. He made fast work of changing pants and underwear, washing up quickly in their bathroom before coming back out, trying not to look sheepish.

Kyo had just come back into the room when Die took off. He raised an eyebrow but sat down with the plates and cups, passing them out and grinning at them. "How's it going guys?" 

Kaoru smiled. "Doing okay. You guys?"

Die settled down next to Kyo and began to pour everyone's drinks, concentrating on that, not wanting to give anything away.

Kyo kept quiet for the moment, shifting to lean against Die. "Can't complain..." 

Toshiya snorted and took his tea, sipping it before shaking his head. "You two have some kind of news... what? Is Die finally pregnant?" He grinned, laughing at his poor attempt for a joke. He was only teasing them of course. 

Die snorted some of his tea he'd been attempting to drink at that. "Yes, Toshiya, I'm pregnant. And I'm going to birth it out my fucking ass."

Toshiya laughed and shook his head, getting comfortable beside Kaoru. "By the way, Shinya says he's sorry he couldn't make it. Miyu's apparently got some doggy flu thing..."

Die made a little face. "Not good. I hope she's okay." He unwrapped his sandwich and took a sizable bite out of it, groaning a little at the taste.

Kyo nibbled at his sandwich, realizing he was rather hungry by now. "This is so good... and yeah, hope doggy's alright. Snowball had a cold last week, but seems to have recovered from it now."

Die glanced around for the cat at that comment, seeing her on the windowsill, soaking up the light. He smirked a little and went back to eating.

Kaoru had unwrapped his sandwich but wasn't eating it just yet. He sat back and crossed his arms. "You called us for a reason, stop holding out."

Kyo followed Die's gaze and smiled softly. Their kitten was starting to be a grownup lady now. He hummed and went back to his food, nibbling a french fry until Kaoru spoke. He spared his food another glance then took a sip of his drink before sighing softly. "Well, I went to the doctor today..."

Kaoru perked up, scooting forward on his seat. "And?"

Kyo licked his lips, glancing at Die before finally just spilling it. "I've been given the all clear to sing again."

Much to everyone's surprise, Kaoru was on his feet in half a second and pretty much falling on Kyo the next, hugging him tight as he let out a whoop of joy. "Finally!"

Die sat back, a smirk on his lips as he watched Kaoru's reaction, chuckling softly as Kyo was pretty much smothered by the other guitarist.

Toshiya almost dropped his sandwich as he heard the news. He clapped his hands, grinning widely. "That's great!!" 

Kyo let out an "oomph" as Kaoru hug-attacked him. He smiled and wrapped his arms around their leader, hugging him back. "Yeah, I'm thrilled... beyond reason." 

Kaoru sat back and beamed at Kyo for half a second before he realized he was in very up in Kyo's personal space. The next moment there was a mad scramble to get out of it and quite a few apologies being said to Kyo and Die as he got back to his own seat beside Toshiya, an embarrassed look on his face.

Die just laughed, shaking his head. "Dork."

Toshiya just laughed, slipping his arm around Kaoru's shoulders. "So! Back to singing! I bet you're relieved!"

Kyo flailed a little as Kaoru struggled to get off of him. He glanced at Die and shrugged before smiling at Toshiya. "Yeah, I am... beyond relieved."

"Me, too," Die breathed out softly. "So much."

Kaoru smiled and then held up a finger. "Who have you told?"

Kyo pointed to Kaoru and Toshiya. "You two plus Nora... that's all."

Kaoru looked immediately thrilled, pulling out his phone, quickly dialing Inoue's number and standing up. 

Toshiya beamed and went back to eating, nodding towards Kaoru. "He has to feel important."

Die chuckled softly and snuggled a little closer to Kyo for the time being.

Kyo smiled at Die and at Kaoru's reaction then leaned against Die's shoulder. 

Die ran his hand gently over Kyo's back, biting into his sandwich again, moaning at the taste of it, watching Kaoru as he left the room, talking excitedly to Inoue.

Kyo went back to his own sandwich, sighing happily. This was great, it really was. 

Die swallowed the bite of sandwich he had and licked his lips a little. "Okay, so... Toshiya. How are you and Kaoru... progressing?"

Toshiya froze mid-bite and looked at Die before ducking his head a little. "Well, we're... at a standstill actually." 

Die gave him a sad little look. "But... why? Any particular reason or just... he's being a workaholic again?"

Toshiya glanced in the direction Kaoru had gone then sighed softly. "It's not that... it's just... I can't get him to... well... you know." He blushed and became very interested in his sandwich, squirming a little.

"Fuck?" Die supplied helpfully, arching his eyebrow a little.

Toshiya's face was bright red now and nodded, picking at his food. "Yeah... we can't seem to get past that point... he always stops there."

"So he'll get past the foreplay, but won't do penetration? Or he won't do blowjobs or anything else either?" Die tilted his head a little, eating a few fries as he waited on the other to respond .

Toshiya let out a sigh. "I can get him to do foreplay up to and including blowjobs but no penetration. I've sort of given up... actually."

"I know this is a super personal question. But... which... way... were you trying to do it?" Die made a little motion. "You or him pitching?"

Toshiya puffed out his cheeks sighing a little. "Er... with him pitching." 

Die cleared his throat a little. "And... um... did it occur to you that maybe you were trying the wrong direction?"

Kaoru chose that moment to walk through the room, heading out onto the patio, the phone still glued to his ear, a happy look on his face. He waved a little and held up a few fingers to signal he'd be in in a few. He slipped out and shut the door, immediately lighting a cigarette.

Toshiya opened his mouth to responded then sighed softly, turning to look at Kaoru as the other strolled past them. He bit his lip and shrugged a little, feeling helpless. "No, I mean... I figured he'd be... top."

Die glanced at Kyo and gave him a look that sort of asked for help here. "I... wouldn't be too sure."

Kyo bit his lip, unsure what the other guitarist's problem was. "Sometimes... it just... takes time..." 

Die finally just cleared his throat and came out with it. "Look, I know what porn I sent him and I know which ones he responded to. It was always the ones with the more masculine of the men taking it. So... if you think you can manage it that way, I'd try it if I were you. But you did not hear that from me."

Toshiya thought about it for a moment, his cheeks coloring. "I'll try it... because... I'm so frustrated! I just want to... have that connection, you know?" 

Kyo nodded sympathetically as he finished eating. He took a sip of tea then spoke. "I know how that is... but don't push him too far."

Die nodded a little and ran his hand through his hair. "Look... try something small first, like while you're blowing him, slip him a finger, make sure to get the prostate fast and make him see the pleasure of it. Maybe he'll be more receptive then."

Toshiya shifted and glanced towards the balcony, nodding a little. "I got him to... finger me once, but couldn't get him to go any further than that." 

"Look, if he's staunchly a bottom, maybe he can't take the thought of putting his dick in you. Maybe he had enough of that when he was pretending to like women." He shrugged. "Trust me, I was relieved to get to the point of a cock in my ass after years of pretending."

Kyo smirked a little, reaching out and petting Die's leg. "And now he does both. So, I know that you're basically a bottom Toto... but you may have to switch up to ease Kaoru into it." 

Toshiya picked at an invisible piece of lint on his pants and nodded. "Okay... I'll give it a try anyway... I think." He laughed a little sheepishly. 

Die gave the other an encouraging look and then glanced up as Kaoru came back inside. 

The guitarist settled down on the couch next to Toshiya, slipping an arm around his shoulders. "So Inoue was thrilled to hear about you, Kyo. He suggested that perhaps since you can start doing therapy that maybe the rest of us can... start working on recording again."

Toshiya blushed a little when Kaoru came back, but leaned into his touch, smiling. "That'd be great! I feel like I'm getting rusty!" 

Kyo smiled and nodded, glancing at Die. "I have... some new lyrics and such, so it'd be nice to have melodies to go with them."

Die looked ready to bolt from his seat to his guitar. He hadn't touched it since Kyo had come home, not wanting to take his focus off of Kyo and he'd been craving it something awful. He beamed at Kaoru and then at Kyo and then at Toshiya, not saying a word, but grinning hugely.

Kaoru chuckled. "I'll take that as a positive." He shifted back in his seat and picked up his sandwich, intent on finishing it.

Kyo glanced at Die, chuckling softly. "You're so transparent, baby. Now I'm going to have to fight your guitar for your attention." He grinned, showing he was just teasing Die, though it was partially true. Once the guitarist was in the zone, an earthquake couldn't shake him out of it. 

Die gave Kyo an alarmed sort of look. "No way!" He puffed out his cheeks and settled back, crossing one leg over the other. Just for curiosity's sake, he murmured, "So... Kaoru, how are things between you and Toshiya?"

Kaoru blinked at him, chewing a mouthful of food. He swallowed after a moment and cleared his throat. "Well... I think things are going well. I mean, emotionally we're in a good place, right, Toshiya?"

Toshiya licked his lips and nodded, patting Kaoru's knee. "Yeah, I think so..." He looked mildly uncomfortable though, given the earlier conversation. 

Kaoru reached down and took Toshiya's hand in his own, gently linking fingers with him. He smiled softly at his lover and then at the couple across from them.

Die nodded a little and then stood up, collecting their trash. He pushed some of it toward Kaoru and murmured, "Come help me for a second, would you?"

Toshiya gave Kaoru's hand a squeeze then reached to take a sip of his drink, sort of hiding behind his cup. 

Kaoru blinked a little and nodded, picking up the rest of the trash and standing to follow Die into the kitchen. 

The moment they got into the kitchen, Die dumped the trash into the bin and then turned around, leaning on the counter and looking Kaoru square in the face. "Okay... so do you really think everything's fine and dandy in you and Toshiya world?"

Kaoru tossed his own handful of trash and looked at Die, feeling vaguely uncomfortable with the way the other was looking at him. "Y-yeah... I mean... what do you mean? We're great..."

"What about in the bedroom? You guys worked things out there?" Die pressed a little, wanting to get him to at least admit something was amiss before throwing advice at him.

Kaoru open and closed his mouth, cheeks coloring a little. "We... uh... we're taking slow but yeah, it's... fine." He scratched the back of his neck, eyes darting away from Die's. 

Die made a little sound and arched his eyebrow at Kaoru. "You might want to um... take it a little faster there, Kaoru."

He winced and looked back at Die before staring at the ground. "Faster, huh? I just thought that... it would be better to er... ease into... that." 

"Kaoru... how long has it been since you two started things out?" Die shifted against the counter and crossed his arms lightly over his chest.

Kaoru coughed and shrugged, shifting from foot-to-foot. "Couple of months maybe?" 

"And you are how old?" Die gave him a look that clearly said this should prove his point.

Kaoru gave Die a look and sighed, raising his hands. "Point taken... but, Die, I just... I'm lost on this, man. I know it's not rocket science but..." 

Die sighed softly and motioned Kaoru closer. "Look... I know I'm only making a guess here... but whatever direction you've been attempting it... if it's not working... try it the other way around."

Kaoru stepped closer and listened to Die before pausing and letting that roll around in his head. After a second, it finally clicked and he hung his head, feeling rather foolish. "You mean, I should... let...Toshiya..." 

Die gave him a pointed look. "Maybe it's too much info, but me and Kyo... we switch out. It's not unusual. It's also not unusual for someone to be staunchly one way or the other. And it's okay to be either side. There's nothing bad about it." He gently reached out and touched his arm. "It's none of my business which direction you guys choose, but simply put, if you're freaking out on the way it is now, then put it the other way."

Kaoru definitely felt like freaking out right then. All of this was just a bit too personal for him, but he supposed he had to appreciate what Die was trying to do. He nodded his head, letting out a puff of breath. "Alright, I'll... try." 

Die gave him a little nod and squeezed his bicep. He gave him a slightly startled look and then laughed. "Damn, Kaoru. Been working out much?"

Kaoru chuckled and shrugged. "Eh, you know, time off, stress... gotta do something to keep my head straight." He smirked a bit and tugged up his shirt, showing off most of a six pack. 

Die gave a low whistle and then shook his head. "Let's just say I'm not showing you my stomach any time soon." He laughed and patted Kaoru's shoulder on the way back out to the living room.

Kaoru laughed and followed Die out, going to sit with Toshiya again. 

Kyo glanced at Die as he came back, eyebrow raised in a question. He knew he'd been chatting with Kaoru, the low murmur of their voices had filtered through, but about what he wasn't quite sure. 

Die settled down next to Kyo and slid his arm around his lover's waist, nuzzling into his shoulder, just so happy with today and how things were going so far. "So..." he glanced at Kyo and then licked his lips. "We have something else to announce... and on this one I get to say it."

Toshiya smiled at his lover and snuggled up to him, smiling at them all. "Oh? And what's that?" 

Kyo looked at Die then to Kaoru and Toshiya, blushing a little. He waved his hand in Die's direction, telling him to go ahead. 

Kaoru settled with Toshiya and took his hand again, arching an eyebrow at Die, but remaining silent, feeling he'd talked enough already in the kitchen.

Die took a deep breath and then held out his left hand, showing the ring there. "We're engaged." He waited on the reactions, his eyes misty with emotion.

Toshiya's jaw just dropped and he let out the most unmanly sound as he jumped forward and pulled Die's hand closer to look at the ring. "Oh my god! Congrats you two!" He beamed at them both, feeling his own eyes tearing up a bit with happiness for them. 

Kyo swallowed thickly and squeezed Die's other hand, smiling a bit watery himself. "Thanks... it's been... a long time coming." 

Kaoru sat there in shock for a moment and then smiled a bit, moving to lean in and look at the ring as well. He sat back and nodded a little. "Congratulations. So... plans yet?"

Die beamed. "I'm planning the engagement party. Have been for a while. But no date for anything else yet."

Kyo cleared his throat and shrugged slightly. "We figured that part could wait for now... I just... with everything going on... I felt I couldn't wait any longer on this." 

Die looked quite ready to have another emotional moment, blinking to try not to end up crying in front of them. 

Kaoru smiled as he crossed one leg over the other and took a sip from his tea. "I think you two just accomplished the biggest news for the day between your two announcements."

Toshiya just smiled, reaching over to pat Die's knee. "Kao's right... the only thing that could make it bigger is if you two were adopting a baby, too!" He laughed and shook his head, finding the idea of either of them being parents at the moment absurd. 

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, no rugrats today... that'll be tomorrow's news or something."

Die let out a little sob, unable to hold it back, and quickly got up to excuse himself. It was clear from the way he was acting though, that these were the happy, but overwhelmed sort of tears. He waved a hand to try to get everyone to stay put as he made his way down the hallway toward the bedroom.

Kyo opened his mouth to ask Die what was wrong, but then stood and followed him, holding up his hand to Toshiya and Kaoru. He slipped into the bedroom and caught Die around the middle, hugging him to his chest tightly. 

Toshiya watched Kyo leave the room then glanced at Kao, biting his lip and shrugging. "Should we... just go?" 

Kaoru glanced at Toshiya and then after the pair of them. "I... yeah, I think that might be best. It's got to be overwhelming getting all this news out in the open." He stood up and licked his lips a little, holding out his hand to Toshiya.

Toshiya nodded, taking Kaoru's hand and following him from the apartment, sparing one more glance towards the hallway before smiling. "I'm happy for them." 

Die stepped into Kyo's embrace, pushing his head against his shoulder and letting out a soft choked sort of sound. "I'm sorry, I just..." he shook his head.

Kyo smiled softly and reached up to stroke Die's hair from his face then leaned in to kiss away some of the tears. "It's okay baby..." 

Kaoru lead them to the door and then opened it, smiling and nodding. "Me, too."

Die sighed softly, leaning into Kyo's touch. He could hear the others leaving and he felt a bit bad that he'd caused them to leave, but honestly he was exhausted, both emotionally and physically. He caught Kyo's hand and gently tugged him toward the bed. "Come on, baby... let's get some much needed rest."

Kyo let Die pull him towards the bed, quickly shedding all of his clothes save his boxers and slipping under the covers, patting the mattress beside him. "Sounds like a plan to me." 

Die followed suit, crawling under the covers and curling up next to him, slipping his arms around his lover and resting his head on Kyo's shoulder. "Am I okay here?" he asked softly.

Kyo waited until Die got comfortable to snuggle closer to him, bringing his hand up to run up and down Die's arm. "You're perfect." He smiled and pressed his lips to Die's forehead. "I love you, Die." 

"I love you, too, darling."


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten , sakura_ame, and eilonwe2

Finally the day had arrived that Die had been planning for over two months. He was so excited to have the big day finally upon them. He had let Kyo sleep in, getting up early and decorating the entire house with the help of his brother. From every single available space he had black and silver streamers and balloons, confetti on the tables over the top of elegant black tablecloths. Their house had been cleaned within an inch of its life and things rearranged to accommodate a lot of people milling around. A long table sat along one wall containing an array of different foods, including miso ramen, Kyo's favorite sushi, pork belly, and even kobe beef you could cook yourself on a little grill he had out on the porch. Along the short wall next to the sliding glass door sat an elegant table filled with all of the band's favorite alcohols and Die's brand new set of Baccarat/Chrome Hearts collaboration crystal ware. Little strands of tiny white lights were strung over the ceiling and wound down anything remotely banister or column-like in the house, little battery powered strands hanging off doorknobs as well. 

Die had even gone so far as to pick out outfits and have them custom made for both Kyo and himself, surprising Kyo with his in a box at the foot of the bed, a little note on top saying _Wear Me_. For his own outfit he had selected a pitch black suit in a rather elegant cut, a single button on the jacket front. Under it he wore a high-end designer red and black vest that matched with Kyo's own silver and black one pattern-wise. And much to his own delight, he'd found the perfect pair of Doc Martins, a collaboration with Chrome Hearts as well, in the same red as his vest.

From one wrist dangled three of his favorite Chrome Hearts bracelets and on the other a new watch he'd been eyeing for a long time and finally gave in on for this occasion. His ring was polished and the only thing adorning his fingers this evening, something he'd made sure to do on purpose. 

Nervously, he rearranged the food trays yet again, his brother lightly slapping his hand away. "Stop it, Die. You should really go check on Kyo and stop fidgeting."

"He'll be fine. I heard him get up and go to the shower a while ago. But there's something off about the table, I'm just not sure what." Die gave him a worried look, pushing his newly red hair back behind his ear. Somehow it had just felt right to go back to a color that had represented his happiness for years, especially now that he was at his happiest ever.

Kyo had awoken to the sounds of Die's voice filtering in through their cracked bedroom door. He sat up and looked around, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he remembered that tonight was the big night. 

He stood and headed for the shower, spotting the box at the foot of the bed with a little card instructing him to wear whatever lay inside. Deciding to hold onto the suspense for now, he grabbed a pair of black silk boxers and went to take his shower, making sure to shave, trim and wash everything thoroughly.

When he was done, he went back into the bedroom and finally opened the box, his mouth dropping open at the finery within. A silver suit paired with an intricately detailed black and silver vest along with an equally ornate shirt. 

Further inspection revealed a pair of Chrome Hearts boots that must have taken Die quite the effort to find, especially in his size. There was also a lovely black hat and a Chrome Hearts bracelet to top off the entire look. 

He took his time dressing, wanting to make sure everything was absolutely perfect. He finally slid the jacket on and buttoned it then went to make sure his hair was perfectly styled. 

With a deep breath, he stepped out of the bedroom and made his way down the hall, seeing the decorations for the first time. "Oh...God."

Die looked up at the sound of Kyo's voice. He stepped out from around the edge of the wall he'd been straightening a picture on and beamed at Kyo. "Hey, baby... damn... that does look just as good as I thought it would on you. Is everything comfortable? Fits right?"

Kyo could hardly speak as he took in the details. Die had put so much effort into making everything right, it honestly choked him up a little and it took him a moment to respond. "Everything is... it's just perfect." 

Die leaned in and gently cupped Kyo's cheek, kissing his lips lightly. It was fairly obvious that close up, that he'd taken the time to do a straight razor shave and had put on a tiny bit of eyeliner to make his eyes pop just that much more for the night. He pulled back just a bit and looked Kyo in the eyes. "It's not too much is it?"

Kyo reached up and ran his hand over Die's smooth face before blinking and catching a strand of hair. "No... and when did you do this?" He'd been so caught up with everything else, he hadn't noticed that Die's hair was its former beautiful red. "I've... always loved your red hair..." 

Die gave him a look that could only be called relieved. "This morning, as a surprise." He lightly kissed Kyo's nose and then straightened up when his brother chose that moment to let out a whistle. "Lookin' nice there, Kyo!"

Kyo pecked Die's lips before turning and smiling at Die's brother. "Thank you. Your brother is... amazing." He laughed and moved over to hug the younger. "And thank you for helping him with the decorations. They're all lovely." He moved around the living room, running his fingers over the elegant tablecloths and scattering confetti, before stepping into the kitchen and eyeing the alcohol and glassware. 

Die sort of trailed after Kyo, watching the way the silver of the suit moved over Kyo's body, finding that he liked it maybe a bit too much. He leaned against the counter and smiled softly. "Isn't the glassware amazing? It came in last week."

Kyo glanced back at Die and grinned, moving to pick up one of the glasses and hold it to the light. "It's beautiful. I love it. I love everything. I can't even begin to tell you how much I appreciate the efforts you've gone to." 

Die looked thrilled at the compliment, perking up a bit as the doorbell rang. "Welp... here we go!" He moved toward the main room, his brother beating him to the door and opening it, some brief conversation occurring about how shoes were allowed tonight and the sound of coats being taken.

Kyo moved to stand next to Die, peering at the front hall as Die's brother let the first guests in, who turned out to be Toshiya and Kaoru. 

Toshiya, dressed in a simple but nice black suit, stepped in first, shaking Die's brother's hand and beaming and Kyo and Die. "Wow, you guys look amazing! This place looks amazing!" 

Kaoru followed Toshiya in, smiling at the pair of them. He held out two small, clear bags, one to each of them. The one he handed Die contained a small clamshell, a traditional engagement gift to represent hoped longevity of marriage. The one he handed over to Kyo contained a dried cuttlefish and a single white thread of hemp, traditionally used to show the wish for a long marriage and the hope that they should grow old and grey together. "Congratulations again and may this be the start of something lasting."

Die immediately peered into his bag, recognized the gift instantly. He looked surprised someone had done something so traditional for them, despite their gender and the country's general outlook on such things. He gave Kaoru the most grateful of looks. "Thank you."

Kyo copied Die, peering into the bag and then into Die's before looking at Kaoru and bowing deeply, feeling honored. "Thank you, so much." 

Toshiya grinned and clasped them both on the shoulder. "Those are from both of us and we wish you many years of happiness." 

Kaoru gave them an embarrassed sort of look and then seemed to spot the booze, making a beeline for it without another word.

Die had to laugh at that, shaking his head a little. "Could have called that one."

Kyo laughed softly then moved to perch on the edge of one of the chairs, waiting on the next guests to arrive. He could already tell that this was going to be one interesting party. 

Toshiya grinned and shook his head. "I think he's afraid I'm going to get ideas or something. The other day I mentioned adopting a chinchilla and I thought he was going to pass out." 

Die let out a laugh and shook his head. "Don't use the word adopt. Tell him you want one and maybe he'll get it for you at that point."

Toshiya snorted and shrugged. "I'm not even sure I want one, there was just a show on about them and I more or less joked about it." He was about to say something else when the doorbell rang again. 

This time Die beat Kenta to the door, opening it and making a little surprised sound before backing up, almost tripping over himself as he let in the next guests. Cipher and Kyo stepped into the foyer, the two older men smirking a bit over Die's reaction to their arrival. Die stood there blushing as Kenta took care of their jackets and explained the shoe policy for the night once again.

Kyo wandered in first, the blonde spotting the younger of his namesake, heading right for him. He came to stand next to him and smiled. "So how's the voice coming?"

Kyo had stood up when the bell rang and was just as surprised to see two of their idols standing in the foyer. When the elder Kyo stepped over to him and spoke, he licked his lips and smiled a little. "Great, actually. It feels so good to be singing again." 

The elder blonde patted Kyo on the shoulder and then advanced on Toshiya and Kaoru, seeing them over by the liquor. He called out to them and made his way over with a huge grin on his face.

Cipher grinned at Die, moving out of the doorway some. "Die, good to see you again. How is everything?" 

Die sort of choked on air when Cipher spoke directly to him. After a moment, he swallowed and then managed to get his voice in working order. "I... you... I'm good!" He looked a little panicked and more than a little like he was going to have a heart attack.

Cipher almost laughed at Die's nervousness, loving that he was still such a fanboy. He reached out and patted him on the shoulder. "That's good, nice setup you've got. This is gonna be a helluva party." He chuckled and wandered off, shaking Kyo's hand on his way to get a drink. 

Kyo watched them both head off and then turned to look at Die before laughing. "Baby, your face... you look like you're about to piss yourself." He raised his hand to his mouth, trying to stifle himself, not wanting to hurt Die's feelings. 

Die turned a little red at Kyo's comment and ducked his head. "Gah... it's just... I didn't expect them to actually show up!" He leaned against the wall, feeling a bit overwhelmed already.

Kenta chuckled softly as he finished putting up their coats. "Die... it will never cease to amaze me how you're in your late thirties and still act like the teenager that saw him as your biggest idol."

Kyo grinned at Kenta and then moved over to press his lips to Die's cheek. "You're adorable... and don't think I'm exactly calm and collected... I didn't think they'd show up either." 

Die glanced up as Kyo pressed his lips to his cheek, seeing the elder Kyo watching them, a surprised sort of look on his face, but a smile a moment later before he looked away. "Er... I think... maybe we should have broke it to some of our guests before tonight that we were... together."

Kyo looked towards their guests then blushed a little, ducking his head. "I sort of... forgot, actually." He thought of his parents and made a mental note to keep his hands to himself until they made their announcement. Clearing his throat, he moved over to the liquor table and poured himself a small drink.

Die gently cupped Kyo's cheek before the other wandered off, smiling softly as Kyo retreated.

Cipher wandered back over to Die and leaned against the wall, smirking. "You dog, you... hooking up with your vocalist, huh?"

Die looked up at Cipher as he came back toward him and leaned against the wall, talking to him. He glanced up and then let out a soft laugh. "Um... yeah. He's... well, to be blunt, he's the love of my life."

The older guitarist grinned widely. "That's great, man. You hold onto that and don't let him get away. There's nothing like it in the world." 

Die gave him a smile and then nodded. "I know. I wouldn't give him up for anything, trust me." He moved so that he was standing on the same side of the hallway as Cipher was, just wanting to be a bit closer to his idol, swallowing a little. "You... have anyone special?"

Cipher nodded, turning to look at Die. When the younger asked if he had anyone, his eyes darted towards the kitchen briefly before he smiled softly. "Yeah, actually. I do..." 

Die's look of surprise was incredibly poorly concealed. "I... wow. Kyo?" He let out a little laugh and leaned in. "That's... coincidental." He chuckled and shook his head, thinking about how he'd modeled himself after Cipher for so long and there he was with Kyo and Cipher was with his own Kyo. The amusement factor of it was seriously not lost on him.

Cipher chuckled softly and ran his tattooed hand through his hair. "Yeah, well, it's been a long time coming. You know, back in the day... we'd hook up, screw around in hotel rooms, but we never really let it get past that. Of course, I imagine it showed in the stage performance, but fans also think we all have big band orgies every night so, you know..." 

Die let out a sort of strangled laugh and ducked his head. "And in some cases they might be right... but... um... yeah, I get your point." He chuckled softly and then took a deep breath. "I think hormones get the best of people sometimes in a confined space for a prolonged period of time."

The elder snorted and nodded. "Indeed they do. Well, now that I've revealed that little secret, I need a drink." He winked and made his way to the makeshift bar, greeting Toshiya and Kaoru. 

Kyo came back to Die with a drink for him, holding it out. "I'm... having a little difficulty believing they're standing in our kitchen. I guess you never really stop being a fan."

Die watched Cipher walk off and Kyo come toward him again. He sagged against the wall and huffed out a soft, "Tell me about it." After a moment, he licked his lips and then murmured, "They're together... just like us. They're together." The moment those words were out of his mouth, the doorbell rang again and Die let out a surprised sound, Kenta moving to open the door again with a chuckle.

Kyo stared at Die, gaping a bit, but didn't get a chance to respond as the bell rang and Kenta answered it to reveal their drummer. "Shinya, glad you could make it." 

Shinya let Kenta take his coat and nodded at the information about the shoes before stepping in and smiling at them both. "I never got to say it properly, so I will now. I am absolutely happy for you two." 

Die beamed happily at their drummer, moving in to hug him briefly. "Thank you and thank you for coming."

Kenta didn't even get the door closed before two more people came in through it. Kuroo and Nora came into the house, Nora looking partially flushed and Kuroo looking rather like they'd just made a mad dash from the car to the apartment. Nora shooed Kenta away from the door, taking up that position, putting away their coats and Kenta wandering off toward the food table to make sure everything was still in order. Kuroo paused to briefly thank his hosts for the evening and then headed right for Kaoru like he had something important to say.

Kaoru turned as he heard the bell, offering Shinya a wave and then raising an eyebrow as Kuroo headed straight for him. When the tech got close enough, Kaoru smiled at him. "Hey, Kuroo, nice party, hm?" 

Kuroo smiled at him and motioned him to the side. "For the love of god, do not tell Die, but we sort of... um... well... his guitar fell over... and the neck snapped. Thank god it wasn't his oldest, but it's in the shop now at least."

Kaoru winced at the news, glancing towards Die then shaking his head. "Oh man, I won't tell him, but you better before he plays it again. He'll know something's up... even if they repair it 100%."

Kuroo made a face. "Yes, but... not tonight." He reached behind Kaoru and grabbed a beer, popping the top and draining half of it with a rather harried look on his face.

Kaoru nodded, agreeing that it was definitely not the time to tell Die that bit of news. 

Kyo found a chair and sat down again, the apartment taking on a definite party atmosphere as the din of several people chatting at once filled the room. He was feeling nervous though, worried about how some of their peers and his parents would accept their engagement. 

Die moved toward Kyo and slid his arm around his shoulders. "Stop worrying. The simple fact of the matter is that if they don't accept us, we don't need them in our life. Period. Because anyone who can't accept that I love you is no friend of mine." He gently cupped Kyo's cheek. "Now cheer up."

Kyo glanced up as Die came over to him. He blushed a bit, sometimes hating that his lover could read him so well. "I know... but I can't help it." He bit his lip then looked up at Die. "I don't want to cause a bigger rift in the family..." 

Die gave Kyo a languid sort of look and then shook his head. "No, baby, you wouldn't be causing the rift, they would be."

Kyo puffed out his cheeks and let out a breath, leaning in to press his lips to Die's cheek before settling back and looking around. "It doesn't matter either way, I'm not changing my mind. Not for them, not for anybody." 

Die beamed down at him. "That's the right idea, love." He straightened up just as someone knocked loudly on the door.

Nora immediately opened the door, looking shocked for a moment and then backing up to allow two people in that probably could have floored anyone in the room: Kyo's parents, Kana and Hiro.

Kyo stood, ready to greet their next guests. The look on Nora's face immediately told him who it must be and he forced himself to step forward and greet his parents, finding that his hands were shaking a bit. "Okaa-san, Otou-san... welcome." He offered his mother a slight smile then nodded his head at his father. 

Kyo's father nodded in return then stepped across the threshold, looking around with the slightest look of disdain on his face. "This is where you live now, hm? I suppose it is... a shade better than the last one you had." He sniffed and moved to sit stiffly on the sofa, nodding curtly at Die as he passed him. 

Kyo bit his tongue hard as Hiro practically insulted him, as usual. He'd been expecting it, but it was difficult to handle. He was a grown man, his father had no business being a dick like that. 

Kyo's mother rolled her eyes and reached out to pat Kyo's arm, smiling softly. "Never mind your father, Hiro's just being... grumpy. How are you doing? Has your throat healed well?" 

Kyo turned back to look at his mother, letting out a breath and shaking his head. "I'm fine, I've started singing again." 

Die watched everything go down, disdain for Kyo's father welling up inside him at the insult. He barely kept himself in check without telling him off over the whole thing. He decided right then, he was going to have a discussion with Hiro out on the porch, without Kyo around, and if that was the end of him being there, then fine. But it was happening before the announcement. He glanced over at Kyo and his mother, seeing their distraction and took the opportunity to get his brother's attention. He hissed in his ear. "I'm going to ask Kyo's father's permission. He's... well, to be nice, he's like our Uncle... and you know which one I'm talking about." He sighed softly. "Keep an eye on the balcony and uh... try to prevent him from throwing me over if he doesn't like it."

With that, he squared his shoulders and headed for the older man, a friendly look on his face. He gave him a deep bow, showing the utmost respect to him before straightening up and speaking quietly. "Niimura-san, may I please have a private word with you on the balcony?"

Hiro raised an eyebrow as Die approached him, tilting his head down in return to his bow. At Die's request, he cleared his throat and stood, nodding. "I suppose... I could do with a smoke anyway." 

Kyo, having moved from the doorway with his mother, glanced over her shoulder to see Die and his father disappearing towards the balcony. He wondered what his lover could possibly be doing and hoped that whatever it was, it wouldn't end up in a shouting match or something. 

Die quietly led his elder out the door, closing it behind them and then offering his lighter for the job of lighting his cigarette. He hoped that showed enough class that he'd be doing well with the whole thing before he got to it. "It's a nice night," he murmured, pulling out his own electronic cigarette and taking a drag off of it.

Hiro took the offered lighter and pulled out a cigarette, lighting it up and taking a puff before leaning against the rail, gazing out at the view. "Yes, but you didn't call me out here to talk about the weather, did you Daisuke?" 

Die let out a soft chuckle. "No, I didn't." He moved his hands to the railing behind him and gazed inside at Kyo to give himself strength. "I called you out here for one very good reason." He turned to look directly at Kyo's father before continuing. "Kyo is a wonderful person... the most amazing man I've ever had the fortune to meet in my entire life." He paused for a moment, watching the other's reaction, and then continued. "He's meant more to me than I can even express, for longer than even he knows and tonight is... well tonight is going to be one of the best moments in my life. But I also want to do this right, I want to take a more traditional path to something... a little less traditional." He slipped his e-cigarette into his pocket. "Niimura-san, I would like to ask you for your blessing in having Kyo... Tooru... in my life... for the rest of it."

Hiro puffed on his cigarette as he watched Die's face in the dying light of the sun, listening to him praise his son. Before he could speak, Die continued on and what he had to say next had the elder blinking in confusion. "You mean... you want to... _be_ with Tooru?" 

Die lifted his head and gave Hiro the most confident look he'd ever given anyone in his entire life. "Yes, I very much do. He's - and this I do not say lightly - the love of my life."

Kyo's father looked up at the younger, feeling vaguely intimidated by the seriousness on his face. He frowned slightly, obviously conflicted. Though he and Kyo had had many a rough patch, he did care for his son and wanted only the best for him like most fathers; but homosexuality was something he'd been taught all his life was wrong and an abomination. Of course, times had changed, but it was still difficult for him to wrap his head around his own son being like _that_. 

After a moment, he flicked his cigarette away and sighed, rubbing his hand over his chin. "I cannot say that I am... comfortable... with such a thing." He paused, glanced back to Die. "However, Tooru will always do whatever he wants, no matter my opinion. I suppose this will go on whether I give my say so or not." 

Die waited, hoping so much that there would be more for Kyo's father to say to him. It sort of hurt that it wasn't the blessing he'd hoped for, but he knew what era the other man was coming from and he knew that such things weren't even something you talked about, much less asked for permission for in his upbringing. Die was simply thankful they weren't in a yelling match and that it wasn't a hell no at least. He pursed his lips a little and then held out his hand, showing the ring Kyo had already placed there. "Tonight is simply us telling our friends and family and me returning the sentiment to Kyo. But... he doesn't even know that part yet."

Hiro nodded, glancing down at the ring with an odd look on his face. "He actually proposed?" He took his glasses from his jacket pocket and slipped them on, getting a better look. "Daisuke... how long have you and Tooru been together exactly?"

Die allowed him to take as much of a look as he needed, feeling perfectly okay with offering up his hand for the other to examine right then. "It'll be a year and a half tomorrow."

Hiro peered over the top of his glasses at Die before straightening back up. He took his time removing the specs and slipping them back into his pocket before looking at Die again. "You know, I have to admire your willingness to bring me out here and ask my permission. As you can imagine, I thought the only man that would be asking to marry my child would be my daughter's husband." As he spoke, his lips twitched just the tiniest bit, barely imperceptible. 

Die nodded just the slightest bit. "I... inferred as much. But as much as this is not traditional, I still believe in tradition and would like to uphold as much of it as I can."

Hiro nodded, waving his hand. "Admirable, I suppose. As I said, Tooru will do whatever he wants so it would be pointless of me, as a man my age, to battle with such a strong will." 

Die took in a soft breath and then gave him an earnest look. "May I ask for one thing... for Tooru?"

The elder nodded again. "You may..."

He gently placed one hand on Hiro's arm. "Please tell him - in some way - that... you're okay with this?" He gave him a small smile. "It's not that he requires it or even expects it... but, I think it would do him real well to hear it. Right from you."

Hiro glanced down at Die's hand then to his face, listening to him speak. The younger's request was not unwarranted, of course, but twenty years of butting heads had definitely put him and his son at odds. However, he cleared his throat and sighed, nodding slightly. "Very well."

Die gave him quite possibly the most grateful smile he'd put on in the past fifteen years of his life and took his hand back. "Thank you, sir." He gave him a slight bow and then gestured toward inside. "Do you drink?"

Hiro nodded slightly then perked up the slightest bit as he stepped inside. "On occasion, yes, I enjoy a drink."

Die eyed him for a moment and then murmured, "Whiskey?" He gave him a smile as he opened the door. "I have one I've been saving. Quite old."

The elder gave Die a look then smiled a bit. "Whiskey would be excellent. I could definitely use a glass." 

Die led him back inside and right to the little bar he'd set up. He picked up two of the crystal tumblers and moved into the kitchen. He opened a cabinet and dug into the back of it, pulling down a bottle of 1958 Glen Garioch whiskey. Die was enormously proud of the bottle, given that he'd bought it in the US for a little under three thousand dollars and it was one of three hundred and twenty eight bottles ever made. He opened it and poured a good glass of it for both himself and Kyo's father, recorking the bottle and holding it up. "Here's to fifty four year old whiskey and the rest of mine and Kyo's lives together."

Hiro followed Die, stopping to lean against the counter in the kitchen as he watched the younger retrieve the obviously old bottle. When he was handed his glass, he raised it to Die's and nodded. "To... you two then." He clinked their glasses then brought his own to his lips, sniffing slightly before taking a large sip. After a moment, he raised his eyebrows and looked at Die. "Well, you've got excellent taste in whiskey." 

Die took a sip, letting it linger on his tongue for a moment, picking up the light floral hints as well as the woodsy taste he loved so much in whiskey. He swallowed it with a soft sigh of appreciation. "Thank you." He looked up as the doorbell was rung once again. "Host duties call, please excuse me." He topped off Hiro's glass and put the bottle back in the cabinet before making a beeline for  
Kyo and the door. He greeted George and a few other staff members they'd invited as they came in the door together, Nora taking care of the rest for them. He leaned against the wall next to Kyo and offered the glass to him. "I finally opened that fifty four year old bottle of Glen Garioch I had. Have some."

Hiro waved Die off, settling against the counter with his glass, letting the alcohol relax him. Eventually he finished his drink and headed back into the living room to sit with his wife who was chatting animatedly with Shinya about dogs. 

Kyo had finished talking with his mother and had made rounds speaking with their guests by the time Die came back. After they'd greeted George and the other new guests, he looked to his lover and the glass he was being handed. "What exactly did my father say to you?" 

Die gave Kyo a soft smile. "My sweet, sweet darling... everything was fine. He knows... about us... now, and he's okay with it. I think maybe you should go have a small talk with him." He gently rubbed over Kyo's back and gently pressed on his back to get him toward his father.

Kyo looked at Die like he was crazy. "He's okay with it? What did you do, bash him over the head or something?" He glanced down at the glass in his hand before lifting it to his lips and taking a sip, distracting himself with it.

Die chuckled softly. "Just... trust me on this one." He looked up as a few of their guests started talking loudly, large amounts of laughter following Cipher's arms flailing wildly as he told some sort of story. "That still amazes me."

Kyo swallowed another sip then turned his head, shaking it as he watched the display. "Yeah, me too." After a moment, he finished off the glass and handed it back to Die before looking towards his father and sighing. "Here goes nothing, I guess." He walked off, moving through the steadily growing crowd to where his father was. 

Die stared in amazement at the finished glass of whiskey. He made a mental note to not hand Kyo another drink until he'd gotten his proposal out of the way or else he might be proposing to someone who could barely stand up. As it was, he was probably pretty tipsy... or at least would be in a few minutes when it really hit his system. He called after him, "Kyo! Try the sushi!" He hoped that would help somehow... absorb part of it at least. He swallowed a bit and looked up as Nora motioned him over.

Kyo moved and sat down beside his father, licking his lips slightly, trying to ignore the fact that his head was buzzing a little already. Maybe the whiskey was a bad idea. "So... Otou-san... Die told me you two had a little... chat." 

Hiro shifted and turned towards Kyo as he sat down. He nodded as Kyo spoke, crossing his arms. "Indeed. He told me some rather interesting news and... asked me a surprising question." 

Kyo cleared his throat and nodded. "Yeah, he told me that he informed you of our... relationship." He fidgeted with his cuff, clearly nervous to be speaking with his father. "What question did he ask you?"

Kyo's father raised an eyebrow then offered the quirk of his lips. "He actually asked my permission to... be with you... and... I told him that you were going to do whatever you wanted so... I might as well just get used to the idea." He paused, glancing towards Die. "I suppose... you could do worse." 

Kyo damn near choked as his father basically told him he approved. He couldn't believe it. Honest to God, could **not** believe that his father had actually approved of something he'd done or chosen. "Otou... I... thank you." It was all he could say, his throat knotting up a bit. 

Hiro just nodded his head, shrugging slightly. "I should've known you'd end up with a man. You've fought every other bit of convention." 

Kyo let out a strangled sort of laugh and ducked his head. Instead of saying anything else, he stood, bowed slightly to his father and headed towards Die, his steps slightly wobbly. 

Die was waiting on him when he was done, having poured himself a glass of his whiskey, sipping at it lightly as he watched Kyo and Hiro talk. When Kyo came back to him, he pulled him into his arms and gave him a soft kiss on the side of his head. "You okay?"

Kyo melted into Die's arms and let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. "I'm not sure, to be honest. I never expected my father to accept it." 

"Mmm... you just needed to let Die handle it, that's all." He ruffled Kyo's hair lightly and then stood up a bit straighter. "Er... great... my parents are here." He spied his mother across the room and felt a brief arrow of panic shoot through him. She always had a tendency to overdo things.

The moment his mother spotted him, she made right for him, her gold and black outfit swirling around her as she came toward him. "Daisuke!" she cried out, opening her arms long before she got to him. "Come here, my sweet darling! It's been too long!"

Die's father, Kaito, followed at a slightly slower pace, rolling his eyes as Moe called out for her child. He was holding three bags, one of them taped shut on the top and the others open slightly.

Kyo chuckled at Die's mother's display, shaking his head slightly. He was just a little bit grateful his mother didn't smother him. He offered both of them a smile and bowed. "Kaito-san, Moe-san, it is good to see you again." 

Die untangled himself from Kyo and accepted his mother's hug. She pulled his head close and pressed her lips to his ear, whispering softly. "Daisuke, I brought you and Kyo some personal gifts. Do not open that bag in here." She pulled back and clapped her hands, beaming.

For his part, Die looked somewhere between mortified and trying to be grateful she cared enough to do such a thing. "Er... thank you..." and under his breath, "I think." His dad gave him a helpless look and pointed at the bags and then down the hall with a questioning look. Die nodded and his dad disappeared after giving Kyo a smile and a wave.

In the next moment, Die's mother turned toward Kyo and without any fanfare at all, she pulled him into her arms and hugged him tightly. "Ah, Kyo! It truly has been forever since I've seen you." She leaned in a bit. "You are coming to Christmas, are you not?"

Kenta, who had been watching the entire exchange, was busy trying not to laugh too much into his glass of wine as he stayed as far out of her range of vision as possible for the moment.

Kyo turned nearly scarlet at Moe's instructions not to open the bag. God only knew what the contents were, and he really didn't want to think about that sort of thing in relation to Die's mother. He barely had time to process it though before he was being pulled into a hug. He smiled and hugged Moe back before nodding. "Yes, of course, I'll be there." 

"Good, good!" she exclaimed. "Daisuke does so love his Christmas!" She reached to pat Die's cheek and then noticed the food. "I am famished! Dai, do you mind, sweetheart?"

At that, Kenta stepped into her viewing range. "I'll take care of it, ma... come on." He gestured her toward the table and picked up a plate for her to start sampling things on.

Die sagged back against the counter, looking overwhelmed. "Jesus fuck." He chuckled a little and pushed a hand through his hair. 

Kyo laughed softly, looking at Die with a grin, feeling lighter already. Die's mother had that effect on people. "Aww, Daidai-chan loves his Christmas." 

Die buried his face in his palm for a moment. "I will _never_ live that down. And all because I cried one year when she gave me a birthday gift and then told me it was for Christmas as well... and then cancelled the family outing." He shook his head a little. 

Kyo slipped his arm around Die's waist, chuckling. "My poor spoiled baby..." He hugged Die then looked up at him. "Speaking of being spoiled, I'm starving." 

Die smiled. "The spider rolls... I made those myself. You should go get us a few pieces while I get some hot tea made, yeah?" They could wait on the other part of the people to show up at the least.

Die's father came back into the room and moved to gently touch Kyo on the arm. "Hey... can we have a word... by the buffet?" he noticed there was no one there any longer after Die's mother and brother had moved away.

Kyo was about to head off to the food table when Die's father stopped him. He nodded his head and started that way. "Sure... er... anything wrong?" 

Kaito shook his head. "Nothing at all, Kyo." He waited until they were at the table and then kept close to him, his voice low. "I... well, let me say I had my suspicions about what tonight might mean and I see the ring on Die's hand. Is it what I think it is?" He offered Kyo a smile, showing him it wasn't a bad thing at all.

Kyo went ahead and picked up a plate, starting to pile it with spider roll pieces and a few other snacks, intending on getting something in his stomach before the whiskey in there turned sour. He glanced at Kaito as he spoke then paused in his actions, swallowing. "Ah... well, yes. It is. I apologize for not... doing it properly." He laughed a bit nervously. "To be honest, I'm not sure what the protocol is here... Die isn't exactly your daughter."

Kaito chuckled softly and shook his head. "Don't worry about that, we're not a real traditional family in that respect. I just wanted to know if I was right, that's all." He placed one pork bun on Kyo's plate and then one on his own as well, looking up as Nora let out a surprised cry at the door. He made a little sound that was rather like Die's confused sounds. "Isn't that your US tour manager?"

Sure enough, Nora had just opened to door to find Rick and Inoue standing there.

Kyo was flooded with relief and he smiled, nodding at Kaito. "Thank you and yes, you're right. This party is meant as an announcement party, but I'm beginning to think everyone is going to guess before we get to that point." He smiled, then looked up at Nora's cry, almost dropping his plate. "It is. I could've sworn he was in the states. Excuse me...." He set his plate to the side and made his way over to the door. "Rick! What are you doing here?" 

From across the room both Die and Kaoru made similar sounds, though Kaoru's was definitely more surprised. Both of them converged on Rick and Inoue.

Rick immediately gave Kyo a short one-armed hug and grinned at them all. "I couldn't resist. I mean... for Die to send an invite all the way to the USA in priority mail, it had to be important, right?"

Toshiya and Shinya had both looked up from their conversation at the commotion and gaped, making their way over.

Kyo hugged Rick back then blinked. "Wow... thanks man..." He was really at a loss of what to say, stunned more than anything. 

Rick made his way through the group, hugging them all in the same manner, smiling softly. "You guys are always worth it."

Die took his turn, Die's father coming over and giving Kyo his plate, wandering off after a moment to go sit by Kyo's parents and Cipher, who were apparently talking with one another.

Toshiya grinned, slapping Rick on the back. "Aw c'mon man, save the warm and fuzzies! We got booze!" He'd obviously had a few by now and was in one helluva mood. 

Kyo took his plate, watching his band mates greet Rick as he finally got to nibble on one of the spider rolls, humming in appreciation. 

Rick let out a laugh and looped arms with Toshiya. "To the booze! Rick is off tonight!"

Nora laughed from behind them, shaking her head as she gave Inoue a brief little hug, the pair of them conversing about how Rick was so unexpected and Inoue had picked him up at the airport at the last moment.

Toshiya cackled and practically skipped off to the bar Die had set up, eagerly pouring Rick a drink and starting in on news about this and that. 

No sooner had Inoue convinced Nora to come along and get a drink, than the door was pushed open and Boss peered in, hiding someone a bit shorter than him behind him. He beamed at Die. "Oh, boys~! I have a surprise!" He stepped in and to the side, revealing Gara, dressed as crazy as he ever was, waving in a faintly shy sort of way.

Kyo, having finished most of his plate by now and feeling a little better, looked up and grinned as Boss and Gara stepped in. He made his way over and shook both their hands. "Hey, thanks for coming. Come on in, get a drink, food... whatever." He laughed a little, definitely not being the host type.

Gara looked a little flustered at Kyo being the one to greet him, a flush rising up on his cheeks. He muttered out something that sounded a little bit like a thank you before looking rather like Die had with Cipher, a wild sort of look in his eyes.

Die let out a laugh and hugged Boss before lightly pushing Gara and smirking at him. "Look who still gets all flustered around Kyo!" 

Gara gave Die an exasperated look. "Shut up, fanboy."

Now it was Kyo's turn to look ruffled, reaching up to scratch at the back of his head. "Oi... so uh, Gara... how's the tour going?" 

Gara refocused on Kyo and tried to look a little less freaked out. "Um... well actually. I heard your voice is getting better, is that right?"

Kyo nodded. "Yeah, much better actually..." He cleared his throat and was about to continue when there was yet another knock on the door. Being the closest, he excused himself from Gara and went to open it, finding his sister on the other side. "Mari... hey, come on in." He stepped aside to let his sister in, taking her coat and stashing it in the closet with the others.

Mari smiled slightly and walked in, looking around, offering her parents a little wave as she spotted them. "How are you doing?"

Kyo gestured to the party and let out a little sigh. "Overwhelmed a bit now. You know I don't care for social functions and my apartment is full of people!" He laughed and shook his head. "Other than that, well I suppose."

Mari chuckled and nodded. "I know, it surprised me to see so many people here! But, I won't keep you. I'm going to go say hi to Mom and Dad." 

Die stood there to the side, looking a little awkward. He'd only met Kyo's sister one time in the past and even then it had been the most brief of meetings. He gave her a little smile as Gara hurried after Boss, calling out something about sushi and vodka.

Kyo told his sister he was doing fine and briefly explained the throat surgery and following therapy and what not. Finally he turned towards Die and licked his lips, motioning his sister to follow him. "Mari, you remember Die, yes?" 

Mari looked Die over, taking note of his and Kyo's seemingly matching outfits and smiled a little. "Yes, of course. Die-san, it's a pleasure to see you again."

Die gave her a brief bow and nodded. "Much the same." He glanced at Kyo, wondering why they'd not talked more about his family in all this time. Before, it hadn't been his business, but for a year and a half he'd been with Kyo and he hadn't talked on it in any kind of detail. It made him a little sad, honestly.

Kyo glanced up at Die and noticed the look on his face and felt a pang of guilt. He had failed to share much about his family with his lover. It hadn't been on purpose really, it was like he'd just never gotten around to it. 

Mari looked from Die to Kyo then smiled again. "Well, I see there is an excellent spread so I think I will go help myself. If you'll excuse me..." With that, she wandered off to the buffet, getting in line behind Shinya and chatting with him briefly before joining her parents. 

Kyo let out a breath and looked towards the hallway. He was ready to escape the crowd and seek solitude even though the party had barely begun. 

Die watched his lover start to wander off, making a mental note to ensure if they did get married that it was a more private affair than this, given his level of discomfort. He had been planning on letting people get settled and then proposing to Kyo. For a fleeting moment, he debated doing it right then. But he couldn't bring himself to skip the pre-made format in his mind.

Rather, Die wandered toward the buffet himself, getting a small cup of miso and a pork bun, eating them rather quickly.

Kyo made his way to the bathroom and took a moment to sit on the edge of the tub, taking a couple of deep breaths to calm himself. He knew that this party was important to Die and he owed it to him to put on a strong face and just deal. After a moment, he stood, took the time to relieve himself then washed his hands before going back out to the party. He stopped and spoke to a couple of people and accepted a drink from Rick, laughing at a joke he was obviously telling though Kyo didn't quite understand all of it. 

Sipping his drink, he finally found Die again and leaned against the wall beside him. "So, looks like everyone that's coming is here..." 

Die had just swallowed the last bite of his pork bun when Kyo came to stand next to him. He looked around the room, seeing only one other person eating right then, and nodded. "Yeah..." He shrugged a little. "Gara said something about the other guys being sorry they couldn't make it, but there was some huge meeting he only weaseled out of and they couldn't."

He caught Kenta's eye and gave him a slow nod. Kenta slipped off around them, making sure he wasn't anywhere near Kyo while he went to start filling and passing out drinks so everyone had one, avoiding giving one to Kyo or Die for now.

Kyo gave a wince of sympathy at the rest of Merry's fate of being stuck in a meeting. He'd been there and it was a pain. His mind wandered to work and the fact that soon they'd all be having meetings about new stuff, making him completely oblivious to Die's and Kenta's exchange. 

At long last, Kenta came to hand both Die and Kyo slim glasses of Champaign. He backed up into the crowd of people, a little smirk on his face, the only person privy to Die's exact plan for the night... with the exception of Kyo's father knowing one part of it.

Die took a deep breath and lightly tapped the side of the crystal glass with his ring, the soft chime of it getting attention all around, everyone quieting down. Kenta stepped forward long enough to take Die's glass and hold it as Die slid his arm around Kyo's shoulders. 

"We have an announcement to make... quite the important one, actually. Some of you may already know and some may have guessed." He held up his ring finger and wiggled it a bit. "Kyo proposed to me just before he had his surgery and I accepted." He pulled him close to his side and smiled softly. "This man is the love of my life and he is the best thing to ever happen to me. And yeah... I have to admit, even the band comes second to this wonderful person I want to spend the rest of my life with. Nothing... nothing at all could be more, or mean more, than Kyo means to me." 

He turned then, moving in front of Kyo and getting down on one knee in front of him. From his suit pocket, he pulled out a ring box and opened it, revealing a Chrome Hearts custom ring, ringed with their signature crosses and fluer de lis. "Niimura Tooru... I have accepted your hand in marriage and I would be honored if you'd accept mine in return." He held out the box, his eyes bright with overwhelming emotional tears.

Kyo's heart jumped in his throat the moment Kenta handed him a champagne glass. He knew this was it, the big moment and suddenly he felt rather ill to his stomach. As Die spoke, he felt a blush creeping up along his neck and onto his cheeks, his eyes finding the floor instead of looking out at the crowd. 

When Die moved in front of him, he opened his mouth and shut it, gazing down at his lover as he got down on one knee and proposed to him. It took him a moment, the back of his hand coming to press against his mouth as he stared at the ring and then into Die's eyes before nodding and choking out the word, "Yes." 

The tears immediately coursed down Die's cheeks, the very moment that Kyo told him yes. He let out a soft sound and pulled the ring free of the box, taking Kyo's left hand and sliding the ring onto his finger. He slid the box into his pocket and stood up, pulling Kyo into his arms, kissing him deeply, right in front of everyone, finally free to show at least those he cared about his truest of affections for Kyo. 

Kyo barely had a moment to look at the ring before he was pulled into Die's arms. He slipped his own around his lover, holding him tight as he kissed him back, their combined tears mingling to make it a very wet kiss. 

A few wolf whistles were let out and a smattering of laughs and clapping, followed soundly by Kenta yelling out, "Everyone drink on it!"

The crowd - some shocked, a few unsurprised - all raised their glasses and toasted the couple before breaking out in applause, letting Die and Kyo know that their close friends and family, at least, accepted their joining. 

Die pulled back from the kiss and gently ran his fingers over Kyo's cheek, catching a few of the tears. He smiled softly and accepted his glass back from Kenta. He hooked arms with Kyo, both their glasses in the hands they linked. He took a sip from his own glass, waiting on Kyo to do the same, a smile on his lips.

Kyo caught Die's hand, squeezing it tightly before raising his own glass and sipping from it, smiling softly before clearing his throat. "I just want everyone to know that without this man here, I wouldn't be. He has gone above and beyond to keep me happy and sane." He paused, choking up a bit. "There is nothing I-I could say to convey just how much... how much I love you, Andou Daisuke." 

Die had to wipe a few more tears at that, giving Kyo a watery smile. "Every single moment has been more than worth it. Because when it's with Kyo, even the downs are better than any of the ups I had before him."

There were a few sniffs in the crowd as Kyo caught and squeezed Die's hand again, his own lips trembling a bit, his chest feeling as if it would burst. 

After a few moments of Die standing there, looking like he was going to burst out in absolute sobs, Nora moved in and clapped her hands, getting attention elsewhere. "Come on, everyone back to what we were doing before, and let's leave the," she coughed, "horribly adorable," her voice rose again, "couple alone!"

Kyo spared Nora a grateful glance before turning and embracing Die in a tight hug, murmuring, "I love you." 

Kyo's family stared in a slight shock, aside from his father who had simply sat there and held his wife's hand while their son was proposed to. It was unconventional, but he supposed if it made his son that happy, he wouldn't deny him that. Kana, Kyo's mother, was crying silently. She was happy for Kyo, though very shocked. Mari, however, was not surprised. She'd guessed Die's feelings for her brother years ago when they'd first met. 

Die pulled Kyo close and gently kissed the side of his head. "I love you, too, baby. I love you from the very bottom of my heart and soul." His eyes flicked around the room, just wondering who was reacting how. His mother and father looked proud, his mom dabbing her eyes with a tissue. Kenta looked happy as all hell and Cipher was in the corner with his own Kyo, looking at him in a way that clearly implied he wanted to kiss the hell out of him, but wasn't. Cipher flicked a glance toward Die and Die smiled softly at him and mouthed, "Do it." Much to Die's surprise, in the next moment, Kyo was in Cipher's arms and he was kissing him rather passionately. He smirked and refocused on his own lover... no his own life-partner. He smiled at the thought. "Want to escape, baby?"

Kyo caught Cipher and his Kyo's kiss, a wide grin on his face as he offered them a thumbs up. He noted everyone had stopped staring at them and when Die asked if he wanted to escape, he was quick to mutter out, "Hell yes..."

Die slid his arm around his lover's waist and gently touched Kenta's shoulder. "If we don't come back out, please tell everyone we are so happy they came and to take the leftover food." With that, he guided Kyo down the hall and into the bedroom, closing the door behind them and quickly opening a few buttons on his shirt, a bit uncomfortable.

Kyo offered Kenta a wave and soft, "Thank you," before happily letting Die lead him to their bedroom. He puffed out his cheeks and slipped off his jacket, hat and shoes, groaning in relief. He popped a few buttons on his own shirt then settled against the dresser, looking down at his ring, inspecting it with a smile. "It's gorgeous, baby."

Die followed suit with the shoes and then his jacket. He unfastened his vest and set it aside, undoing all but one of the buttons on his black shirt. He smiled softly and moved to pull Kyo into his arms again. "I'm glad you like it, I thought about what would suit you for so long and I kept coming back to this design, so... I went with it." 

Kyo tucked his head under Die's chin, holding him tightly. "You could have given me a piece of twine and it would mean just as much..." 

"I know," he murmured softly. "Trust me, I know." He closed his eyes and held the other close, exhaustion filtering through him. "I love you... I love you so goddamned much."

Kyo held onto his lover, eyes closing as he let out a tired sigh. At Die's words, he tilted his head up and kissed his chin. "I love you, too, baby. So, so much." 

"Normally... I'd want to fuck your brains out. But I'm exhausted," he murmured softly. "Shall we just... lay down and..." he let out a soft laugh, "cuddle?"

Kyo laughed softly and nodded, stepping away from Die to rid himself of his own vest and shirt, leaving the pants on for now as he moved towards the bed. "Sounds... wonderful." 

Die quietly unbuttoned the rest of his shirt, slipping it off and pausing to take off his pants, revealing a tight pair of silver underwear. He glanced at Kyo to see his reaction, arching an eyebrow and then laughing softly as he padded over and slipped onto the bed, tossing his socks off and curling up close to Kyo.

Kyo stared at the underwear, finding them absolutely amazing on Die and almost enough to get him riled up, even in his exhausted state. "Damn, baby, those are sexy as hell." He snuggled up to Die, running his hand down and over his hip. 

Die chuckled, slipping one leg over Kyo's own and holding him close to his chest. "Mmm... that was originally the point of them." He chuckled softly, resting his head lightly on the pillow next to Kyo's shoulder.

Kyo shifted and turned, pressing his lips softly to Die's, reaching up to thread his fingers through the other's hair. "I bet... and... in case I didn't say it enough earlier, I _love_ your hair." 

Die closed his eyes, letting his head tilt toward Kyo's touch. He let out a soft hum as he enjoyed the touch. "Thank you, love."

Kyo smiled and let his hand nestle in red locks, eyes shutting and breathing evening out. He felt so at peace with everything right then.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

The night had been a sort of restless beast for Die. All night, he'd woken up, every few hours. First to get up and take a piss, then to get a glass of water, and then just to flop around like a fish. He was so worked up from the previous night that it was difficult to find any peace at all tonight.

But at long last, he finally slept for a few solid hours, waking up when the sun started peeking in the window. He rolled toward Kyo, pushing the covers off of them both just to admire his lover's body. His eyes fell first on the slowly healing wound on Kyo's abdomen, and then slipped down lower, across his hip bone and then down to find a significant tent in his lover's pants. He chuckled softly.

Kyo was not unaware of Die's fitful sleep, waking a few times when the other would toss and turn or get up. He couldn't wake up enough to do anything about it until he heard Die chuckling beside him. He laid there for a moment, then realized that he was hard as a rock. With his eyes still closed and a tiny smirk on his face, he slowly slipped his hand down and into his pants, letting out a soft grunt as he took himself in hand.

Die let out a soft gasp, watching as Kyo slipped his hand into his underwear and started stroking his cock. Watching Kyo touch himself like this was the most erotic of things and after a few minutes, he couldn't help but slip his own hand down and start fondling himself through his own underwear.

Kyo cracked an eye open at Die's gasp, the smirk widening as he pushed his hips up into his own touch, then paused to get his underwear out of the way, groaning softly as his cock was freed. He carried on stroking himself afterward, sighing with pleasure. 

Die shifted just a little, he hadn't looked up at Kyo's face, so he had no idea the other knew he was watching or that he was even fully awake. He bit his lip harshly, trying to contain any noises he wanted to make as Kyo revealed himself fully and started to stroke himself off again. With a little gasp, he slipped closer to his lover, his eyes intently focusing on Kyo's hand moving over his cock.

Kyo could practically _feel_ Die's eyes on him as he stroked himself. He sped up his strokes for a second then finally stopped, just holding himself. He licked his lips and grinned slightly before murmuring, "If you're going to get that close to it, you can just suck it instead." 

Die gasped when Kyo spoke up, his head snapping up to look at his face. He flushed slightly and ducked his head. "Er... I... I thought you were asleep." Not that that was a good excuse. In fact, in the book of excuses, that was the worst one he'd ever made.

Kyo chuckled softly and reached out, threading his fingers through Die's hair and tugging lightly. "I was..." 

Die pursed his lips and then chuckled. "So... how long were you actually awake for in this?" he asked softly, reaching to slide his hand over Kyo's thigh, shuddering pleasantly.

Kyo smirked. "Right about when I started jacking off..." He shifted and spread his thighs a bit, licking his lips. "How long have I been hard like this and you've just laid there letting me suffer?" 

Die shifted a little. "About two minutes longer than that? That... I'm aware of, anyway." He ran a hand through his hair and the reached to touch his hip again. "It's just... god you're so sexy when you're mostly awake and- and so goddamned hard."

Kyo turned towards Die, biting back a self-satisfied smirk at his lover's compliment. He reached down and ran his hand over his stiff length, letting out a soft groan which turned into an unexpected yawn. "It's cuz I was dreaming about screwing you senseless over your amp while the crowd watched." 

Die quite literally choked on air at that. "Oh my god, are you serious?!" He flicked his eyes up to Kyo and gave him a dirty grin as he pushed himself up, moving up his body. "That's fucking hot."

Kyo let go of himself in favor of reaching for Die, stroking a single nail down his spine. "Mmhmm... it was..." He moved his hand back up to tangle in the red locks, tugging Die down for a slightly uncoordinated kiss, his brain still slightly fogged with sleep even though one part of him was very much awake and ready to go. 

Die groaned at the idea that the other was serious about the fact that he'd been dreaming about fucking him against his amp. The sheer idea of it was amazing as hell. He leaned down into the kiss and pushed his tongue into the other's mouth. After a moment, he pulled back and then straddled Kyo's thighs. "I take it my darling wants to fuck the hell out of me, yes?" He smirked.

Kyo smirked up at Die, sliding his hands down to grasp his hips, rolling his own up a bit. "Mmm, yes, yes he would." Shifting a bit, he slid his hand across Die's thigh, scratching the skin lightly before moving to stroke over his length. "Fuck, you're gorgeous... you know that?"

Die chuckled softly and kissed his cheek gently. He shifted up and settled over him, reaching between his thighs to take hold of his length, positioning it at his entrance and wincing a little as he started to push down on him, a low groan slipping past his lips. Maybe it was foolish to do it without lube, but he was horny and still relaxed enough from sleep to pull it off.

Kyo gazed up at Die, then gasped a little as he started sliding down onto him without any prep or even lube. His hands slipped from Die's lips to fist in the bed sheets, moaning as hot, tight heat enveloped him.

Die moved down until he had fully seated himself on the other, shivering as he remained there. After a moment, he groaned and started to move up and down on the other's dick. "Oh _fuck_!" he cried out as he started to move. It'd been too long since he'd taken it from his lover and it just felt so utterly amazing.

Kyo couldn't contain the sounds spilling from his lips as Die started moving, the feeling close to bliss for him. "Dai... oh God!" After a few moments, he started rolling his hips up to meet Die, pushing deeper into his body, a keening sound of pleasure escaping him. 

Die settled down after a moment, pushing himself down fully on him. He reached down, framing Kyo's face with his hands and staring down intently at him. "I love you, Tooru... I love you with my entire heart and soul. And I ask for nothing more than you to be in my life for the rest of it." With that, he leaned down and kissed him gently on the lips, starting to move again after a few moments.

Kyo shuddered as Die fully seated himself on his length. When his lover cupped his face and spoke such sweet words to him, he felt a lump rise in his throat. He swallowed a couple of times, his hands trailing up Die's sides as he kissed him back, murmuring, "Daisuke... Gods..." After getting a better hold of himself, he stroked his fingers through Die's hair, shifting slightly. "I will be here always..." With that, he moved to lace their left hands together. "I love you so much."

Slowly, Die began to ramp it up, taking their linked hands and pushing them down over his length. He started to stroke himself ever so slowly as he moved over Kyo's cock, moaning into his mouth. Everything closed down around him, narrowing his world down to him and Kyo, nothing else mattering at all.

Kyo pushed up into Die's body, squeezing his hand tightly then letting him settle it on his length, stroking him. He brought his other hand up to wrap around Die's shoulders, holding him close as they moved together. It was amazing. 

Die let out a low groan, moving himself over Kyo, rocking in a soft sort of rhythm rather than the frantic pace that he normally would have chosen for morning sex. But this wasn't just any sex, this was officially engaged sex and he wanted it to be memorable.

Kyo held on as Die moved, letting out soft moans and pants every now and then. It had to have been the atmosphere, but everything about this felt so wonderful, he didn't want it to end. "Ah, Daisuke... you're so beautiful." 

"My sweet baby," Die whispered, slipping down closer to him, almost lying on top of him as he moved, groaning softly, only moving a few inches of Kyo's cock in and out of him. He closed his eyes and slowly allowed himself to start ramping up toward his orgasm, keeping the exact same slow pace, just letting it feel oh so good.

When Die nearly lay atop him, he slipped his arms around him and nuzzled his face into his neck, inhaling his scent as he slowly bucked his hips up, his cock twitching, aching for release. "My everything... my absolute.... everything." 

Die worked a little bit faster over his length. After a few more moments, he let out a little cry, his length spasming as he started to cum, his cum spurting out across Kyo's abdomen.

Kyo held onto Die, pushing up into him, moaning as he felt him start to cum. He moved his hands down to grip Die's ass, pushing up into his body hard for a moment before finding his own end, a cry of bliss escaping his lips. "Ah... Die!" 

Die pushed down on him and remained there, whimpering softly as he felt Kyo's cock start to throb inside him, the feeling of his hot cum warming his insides and making him squirm a little. "Baby," he mumbled.

Kyo moaned softly, shifting just slightly to kiss Die hard on the mouth before pulling back and looking into his eyes. "I love you, my Daisuke." 

"I love you so very much, Kyo... Tooru. I love you beyond everything else in the entire world."

Kyo smiled softly, stroking his hand over Die's face. His mind wandered slightly as he thought about how he'd once thought he'd never find this sort of happiness and yet, here it was and it was beautiful. 

Die slipped up off Kyo's cock and then slid back down over his body. He pushed his face against Kyo's neck, kissing him ever so gently over his tattoo, a few tears slipping out and plinking down on Kyo's shoulder. "I love you."

Kyo shivered as Die moved off of his length, but gladly wrapped his arms around him, holding him close, a soft smile on his lips as he felt the tears on his shoulder. 

It took Die a few more minutes before he could pull back and remove himself from on top of Kyo, a slightly embarrassed look on his face. "I um... I'll be right back." He started to push himself up out of bed.

Kyo blinked a little at the look on Die's face, reaching out to catch him by the wrist. "Baby... what is it?"

Die paused, shivering slightly. He pursed his lips a little and slowly took Kyo's hand, pushing it down over his belly, which was slightly distended. His heart raced in his chest at the action. He gently patted Kyo's hand and then stood up. 

Kyo glanced down at where Die had put his hand, pressing just the slightest bit with a little smile. He didn't want to push too far, but he shifted and stood up as well, patting his own lower abdomen. "Me, too." 

Die licked his lips a little, nodding slightly at Kyo as he stood up as well. He headed into the bathroom, blushing slightly as he moved to stand against the wall, his head bowed a little. "I um... you go first," he murmured quietly.

Kyo nodded, patting Die's arm softly before moving over to the toilet. He stood there for a few seconds before he started going, the stream making a loud splashing sound and a groan passing through his lips at the relief. 

It took Die a few moments before he finally looked toward Kyo, watching what he was doing. He blushed slightly, arousal of a different sort passing through him. He wet his lips and moved toward him, leaning against his back and watching over his shoulder, one hand on his hip.

Kyo smirked a little, leaning back against Die a bit, pushing the piss a bit harder for his benefit. After the last few spurts, he gave himself a couple of strokes and then stopped, tilting his head back to look up at his lover, trying to gauge his reaction. 

Die was almost trembling with the effort of holding himself back by the time Kyo was done. He slid his hand over Kyo's hip and swallowed hard as he pushed it down over the neatly trimmed thatch of hair around the base of Kyo's cock. He gave him a little squeeze and then gently shifted their positions, one hand pressing against the wall as he leaned forward and started to go, relief coursing through him.

Kyo let out a little sound when Die squeezed him then moved, slipping his arms around Die's waist, resting one hand on his abdomen and applying light pressure. 

Just that gentle pressure was everything for the moment. Slowly, he slid his hand from his length up to Kyo's hand, splaying over it, just watching their hands as he emptied his bladder completely. "Baby," he whispered out.

Kyo pressed his lips to Die's shoulder, squeezing his hip with his other hand. "Feels good, hmm?" 

Die nodded. "It does." He finished up after a moment and shivered as he slid his hand back down to shake off the last few drops, leaning back into Kyo's touch and closing his eyes with a soft, "Thanks...."

Kyo let a soft smile cross his lips as he shifted and hugged Die from behind, placing a few kisses across his shoulder blades. "Anytime."

Die reached to flush the toilet, straightening up and then moving to wash his hands quickly. He moved aside to let Kyo in, grabbing his toothbrush, a soft smile on his lips.

Kyo followed Die to the sink, rinsing his hands and grabbing his own toothbrush, yawning as he put toothpaste on it. "I consider it a compliment that you're willing to deal with my morning breath..." He smiled and started brushing his teeth, half leaning against Die as he did.

Die let out a soft laugh and shook his head. "Mmm..." he leaned over and spat into the sink. "Baby, I'd deal with hellfire for you."

Kyo snorted and spat as well before brushing his tongue. "Good to know... I have some hellfire waiting for you." 

Die winked as he washed out his toothbrush and reached for the mouthwash.

Kyo grinned, finishing up then turning to slip his arms around Die's waist, ignoring the fact that the other had a mouth full of mouthwash.

Die swished his mouthwash around and then leaned over to spit it out, wiping his mouth and rinsing his hand. He stood upright and turned in his arms. "Mmm... minty fresh."

Kyo chuckled and leaned up, kissing Die's lips, tasting said minty-ness. "Mm, indeed..." 

Die chuckled, flicking his tongue out to lap at Kyo's lips. He pulled back and yawned. "So... what are we doing for today?"

Kyo ran his hands up and down Die's sides, seemingly unable to stop touching him. He gave a shrug of his shoulders, humming softly. "Each other?" 

Die let out a soft laugh. "Did the dry spell from you being sick hit you so hard you want to fuck again so soon?" He slid his hand over Kyo's cheek. "Not that I'm complaining..."

Kyo smirked then leaned into Die's touch, shrugging his shoulders slightly. "I just can't get enough of you. You're like the most exquisite drug..."

"Nope... that's you, my sweet." He slid his hand over Kyo's back and leaned in, gently kissing him. "Okay... but this time you fuck me."

Kyo shook his head then pulled Die closer, kissing him back slowly at first then a little more passionately. 

Die groaned softly, bucking his hips toward Kyo. He shivered a little and licked his lips. "Gorgeous... mmm... come on, baby. Couch?" He smirked a little, looking happy.

Kyo slipped his hands to Die's hips, grinding against him for a moment before relenting and nodding. "Couch sounds good to me." He grinned and reached out, grasping Die's hand and pulling him out of the bathroom and down the hall towards the living room.   
Die snatched up the lube from the bathroom counter as he rushed after Kyo, laughing at how he was being drug along. Kyo was obviously eager for this, which made him happier than he could have ever expressed.

Kyo shot Die a grin then stepped back away from him, perching on the back of the couch, his eyes narrowing slightly as he ran his hand down to his own crotch, grasping at himself with a groan. 

Die let out a grunt as Kyo groped himself. "God I love it when you're lewd like that." He crawled onto the couch, settling on his knees in front of Kyo. "Baby... I dare you... next show... grab yourself. Make it a huge re-entry to the scene."

Kyo licked his lips and gazed at Die, giving a low moan as he pushed into his hand, squeezing a bit harshly at himself. He let out a short laugh, smirking. "Mm I might do just that..." 

"No might... do it and I'll blow you like you've never been blown before, right after the show." He licked his lips and gave him a sultry look before leaning in and pressing a kiss to his thigh.

Kyo shuddered at the very thought, his cock twitching some in his hand. "Fuck, baby... it's a deal." He reached out and ran a hand through Die's hair, fingering the red with a smile. "I'm going to fuck you like the slutty redhead you are..." 

A soft growl rose up in Die's throat as he nipped at the sensitive skin of the other's thigh. "Mmm... you better." He pulled back and shifted to settle himself over the arm of the couch, displaying his ass for Kyo's viewing pleasure.

Kyo licked his lips and finally slid off the back of the couch, grabbing up the lube and unceremoniously pouring some right along Die's crack. "Fucking sexy ass..." He shifted and leaned forward, placing several kisses and nips to Die's ass cheeks as he lifted his hand and started rubbing his fingers against his hole. 

"A-ah!" Die shivered slightly, pushing back toward him, arousal shivering along his spine at the actions. "Hnngggg!"

Kyo smirked at his lover's reaction, slipping a finger into his body, working it in and out as his mouth travelled downward, tongue flicking over his taint lightly. 

"Fuck!" Die hissed out, hanging his head and biting at his lower lip. "Oh dear god... Kyo." If only Kyo hadn't already lubed him up, he'd ask for slightly more, no matter how dirty it was, it felt so fucking amazing to have Kyo's tongue in forbidden places. But he didn't give a single indication he wanted it, didn't ask and didn't move. After a moment, he murmured, "Just do it, fuck me."

Kyo tongued the backside of Die's sac for a moment then chuckled lowly, a dirty thought coming to mind. He took advantage of the fact that this was flavored lube and ran his tongue upward, pausing to swirl it around where his finger was currently thrusting in and out of Die's body. "Mmm... I love it when you're eager..."

Die didn't hold back anything the moment that Kyo's tongue went exactly where he wanted it. He let out a loud curse, his back arching harder as he let the whole feeling slip through him.

Kyo groaned at Die's display, pushing his finger in deeply then keeping it still as he lapped at the skin around it, almost enjoying the mixed flavors of strawberry and Die. 

After a few more licks, he finally pulled back and, without any warning, thrust his cock into Die's ass with a loud cry. 

Die almost whimpered when Kyo pulled his finger out and stopped licking. But a moment later, Kyo's dick was buried in his ass and that was all he needed. He let out a cry that was more a scream than anything else. He shuddered, closing his eyes, and clung to the couch. "O-oh!"

Kyo grabbed hold of Die's hips and started thrusting hard and fast into him, his cock rock hard as he buried it deep into his lover's body over and over. "F-fuck!" 

Die shifted slightly, letting his arm rest on the sofa. He groaned as he tugged Kyo's hand down to his dick. "Please," he whispered out.

Kyo grunted and changed his positioning slightly, hunching over Die's body some so he could reach him. He wrapped his hand around his dick, stroking him almost frantically as he continued thrusting into his body. "Gods... Dai!"

Die shuddered, pushing his forehead into the couch cushions, biting his lip to keep in some of his sounds just so they weren't called in given this was still an apartment. He'd had quite enough of that in his life and now was not the time. 

Kyo moaned as he leaned down, draping his body over Die's back, his teeth sinking into his shoulder blade as his hips worked, the pace becoming slightly erratic.   
The feeling of Kyo's teeth biting at his shoulder was all he needed. He let out a cry he couldn't possibly have held back and spilled himself out across the seat underneath him.

Die's body clenching around him finally thrust Kyo over the edge into sweet bliss. His hips stilled as he came, filling Die's passage with his offering, shuddering against him as he did.

"Kyo," he breathed out, shivering a little and licked his lips slightly.

Kyo halfway collapsed against Die's back, panting a bit as he placed a kiss to the bruise left by his teeth. "Die..." He let out a laugh, easing out of the other's body slowly and watching as his cum dribbled out. "Gods you're... perfect."

It felt so good, the way the other's cum slid down his inner thigh that Die remained right where he was, a satisfied smile on his lips. "Mmm... thank you."


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2
> 
> Two chapters for the new years! Happy new year everyone! Enjoy the maid kink!

The holidays were finally behind them and things had settled back into a normal sort of routine for Kyo and Die. Recording, getting ready for a new tour and other band related activities. What Kyo hadn't told Die was that one of the presents he'd gotten his lover hadn't arrived in time for the Christmas holiday but instead, it'd come several days after the new year. 

Kyo had waited until the weekend and finally decided to give Die his gift. He took the time to wrap it in plain, silver paper and set it on the coffee table while he waited for Die to get home from the studio. He'd started flipping TV channels when he finally heard the front door opening. "Hey, babe..." 

Die had had a long day at work, having re-recorded a section of one of the songs at least forty times before he was satisfied with it. Hours later, he finally arrived at home. Plunking his keys and bag down on the hall table, he responded to his lover's voice immediately. "I'm home at last!"

With that, he rounded the corner into the living room and immediately leaned over to lightly kiss Kyo on the lips.

Kyo smiled and reached up, lacing his hand through Die's hair and kissing him back deeply. "Welcome home, Koi... long day?" He patted the seat beside him, holding out a cold beer he'd gotten out just for him.

Die nodded. "Stubborn-ass part, that's all." He sat down. "Not the worst day ever, that's for sure." But assuredly not the best either.  
Kyo hummed sympathetically and ran his hand over Die's shoulder lightly before gesturing to the somewhat large box on the table. "Got you a little something..." 

Die's eyes lit up at the prospect of having a gift to come home to. He took a healthy swig of the beer he'd been handed and placed it down on the table. He reached for the package and picked it up, lightly turning it in his hands and then humming softly while he deliberated what it was.

Kyo watched Die with anticipation as he picked up the box. He scooted to the edge of his seat and grinned a little. "A late Christmas present that got stuck in the mail... I hope... you like it." He rubbed his hands over the top of his thighs, somewhat anxious about Die's reaction. 

Die shook it slightly, hearing something thump lightly in the box. "Clothing?" He didn't really expect an answer, just reached over and began opening the packaging. After a moment, he extracted a box from the paper and then opened the box itself, revealing something red and lacey. He smirked a bit and pulled out the first thing, a pair of red lace underwear with very girly frills along the sides and little bows over where his hipbones would go, the back of it just a measly strip of fabric. He placed them on his thigh and delved in for the second part, which he took note was a garter and some matching wrist-cuffs. His grin increased a little. "You kinky fuck," he murmured, the amusement and happiness evident in his voice.

Finally, he pulled out the large red piece of fabric, holding it up and letting it unfold. It revealed itself to be what appeared to be a maid's outfit in red and white, little white lacing along the edges, the main part red. The cute little shoulders puffed out, meant to fall down off the shoulders and fit snugly around the upper arms, the front obviously cut for a woman's breasts, but Die was unconcerned, knowing he could fix that easily enough in one of two ways. The front crisscrossed up to tie around the back of the neck, and there was a tiny apron left in the bottom of the box, right next to a small feather-duster.

He chuckled as he placed it back in the box, adding the pieces back in. One look at Kyo's face told him all he needed to know. This was a blatant request and one he wasn't about to ignore. He stood up, picking up the box and his beer. "Twenty minutes, the bedroom." With that, he walked off to the bathroom and shut the door behind himself.

Kyo watched as Die went through the several pieces inside the box, waiting on rejection or any other kind of negative reaction. It didn't come however, and as Die's face lit up, a shiver of arousal went through him. It was something he'd considered for a while after running into some porn with a similar theme. He also knew that Die would love the panties so he'd hoped there'd be enough of a trade-off that this would work.

When Die picked up the box and headed for the bedroom, he simply nodded and licked his lips, standing and going to the kitchen to grab his own beer. 

By the time twenty minutes had passed, he'd finished the beer and was feeling a good deal more relaxed. He made his way to their bedroom, going to sit on the edge of the bed to wait, his pants already tenting out a bit. 

Die hadn't wasted any time at all once he'd gotten into the bathroom. Rather, he had quickly stripped down and then washed up. He'd applied the most girly scented cologne he had, something a fan had given him once with a vaguely flowery scent. After that, he painted his nails a vibrant red that matched the outfit, ensuring his hair was done up with finger-ringlets, set in place with mousse. He put on a fine mist of shimmer that he'd been toying with using to make the fans think they were tripping out when he was on stage a while back. Every inch of him was shaved clean for once: legs, armpits, and his entire pubic region. 

He pulled on the entire outfit and then quickly prepped himself before washing his hands, slipping in a small butt-plug to keep himself stretched out for Kyo's convenience. With that, he leaned in toward the mirror and applied a thin line of eyeliner on each eye and a slightly smoky shadow to the lids as well as Vaseline intensive care on his lips.

After he was done with that, he opened the door and took a deep breath, hoping that this wasn't all too far for Kyo. He picked up the feather duster and headed down the hallway, humming softly and trying to flounce about like a woman might if she were in a porn. He came into the room, purposely not looking at Kyo and going about dusting a few things, bending over real well to dust the bottom of the dresser. After a moment, he turned around and made a surprised face. "Ah! So sorry, Niimura-san!"

Kyo had begun shifting about on the bed while waiting for Die to come in. He was both aroused and nervous, hoping that his lover wasn't too incredibly freaked out by the outfit or anything. 

When Die finally came in, his eyes widened quite a bit and a soft sound of approval slipped past his lips. He opened his mouth to speak but then snapped it shut as Die bent over to 'dust' something, his ass so gloriously presented to Kyo in the thong. He could also spot the butt plug in lace and it just made his cock throb all the more. 

Die's voice broke him out his trance and he looked up at him, gazing at his face and all of the trouble his lover had gone to, to make this perfect. "Oh... that's quite alright... I was just enjoying the view..." 

Die moved toward the bed and leaned over Kyo in pretense of dusting the night stand in a manner that only someone in a porno would attempt. He pressed closer, letting Kyo feel that it wasn't just tissues he'd stuffed inside the top part to make it look like boobs, though they only slightly felt like it. "I hope I'm doing my job right, Mr. Niimura." He pulled back and held the feather-duster out to the side, his hip jutted out at an angle. "I just... I'm so new to this!"

Kyo grunted softly as Die pressed against him, fake breasts that he had no clue how the other had pulled off squashed against his chest and shoulder. He'd reached up to touch Die when the other had pulled back, his stance so damn perfect for the look. "Oh, I think you're doing just fine, honey... but I think you missed a spot there on the shelf." He pointed in front of him, eager to get another good look at Die's behind. 

Die whirled around on the spot with a soft, "Oh!" and rushed over to the dresser in his flouncy little way. He quickly bent over and dusted slightly above where he had before. "Is it here, Niimura-san?" He turned a little to the right. "Or here?" He sounded a bit distressed. "Oh my, I can't seem to tell!"

Kyo almost laughed as Die prissed around so damn perfectly. He watched him for a moment then reached out, placing his hands on the other's hips, lightly pushing him to the side. "No, no, it's right there... way on the bottom shelf." 

Die debated for a moment on how he was going to bend over. Finally, he decided to just fully bend over, his legs straight, despite it pushing blood into his head. He vigorously dusted the bottom shelf. "I'm doing it, Niimura-san! I'm doing it!" He had to keep his face hidden because he looked like he was going to burst out laughing at any moment from the comment.

Kyo bit his lip as Die bent all the way over. He was simultaneously amused and aroused from the display and finally reached out to pat Die's ass cheek. "That's good... very good... thank you." He licked his lips and sat back again, running his hand over his crotch, groping himself for a moment then letting go with a soft groan. 

Die straightened up and pretended to adjust his skirt, though he was actually pulling it up a bit more, damn near showing his balls off with how high it was riding. He turned back around after he'd schooled his face into something more innocent. "Niimura-san are you-" he let the words die on his lips as he stared down at Kyo's hand groping over his cock in his pants, "okay?" he finished with mock surprise. "Are you in pain? Did you hurt yourself, Sir?"

Kyo almost uttered a curse as Die tugging his skirt up, the panties formed deliciously and showing all that Die had to offer. When he was caught with his hand over his crotch, he jerked it away in faked embarrassment. 

"I… uhm... well... honestly, I _am_ in some kind of pain... it's so swollen... and my pants are too tight. I think you might have shrunk them in the wash..." He attempted a slightly stern look, hoping it worked. 

Die opened his mouth and then allowed his mouth to form a little surprised 'o'. He gave the other his best pout, his plump lower lip sticking out slightly. "I'm so sorry, Sir. I never meant to shrink your clothing." He came over to him and laid the feather duster down on the bed beside Kyo. "Here, let me help you out of them." He reached for the other's belt, unfastening it, intentionally brushing over his dick while he went about getting it off his body. "Oh my! They are so very tight in this region, aren't they?" He got them open and gasped as Kyo's dick tented out a bit more in his underwear. "O-oh! Um..." he tried to sound surprised, "Niimura-san! Your penis is hard!" Inside, he was laughing so hard, but outside, he was the perfect picture of a porno maid.

Kyo huffed at Die's apology. "Yes, well, be more careful next time..." He let Die undo his belt and pants, another soft groan escaping him when his dick was touched. He had to hold in a laugh when Die exclaimed that his penis was hard, the whole thing almost too much for him. It took him a moment before he cleared his throat and looked at Die. "Why yes, yes it is... so hard... thanks to your 'cleaning' skills..." 

Die knelt down in front of him and slowly reached for his boxer briefs, slipping his fingers under the hem of them, a curious look on his face. "I'll do my best, Niimura-san. I want to make this up to you. First, I ruin your pants, and then I give you this discomfort." He pulled his underwear down, revealing Kyo's fully-erect cock. "Oh my! You're so _big_!" Without touching it at all, he leaned in and licked from base to tip. He kissed the head of his cock and then sucked the tip into his mouth, sucking only on that for a moment.

Kyo bit his lip as Die pulled his boxers down, his cock springing free, standing out proudly. Despite the slight bit of hilarity to the whole situation, he couldn't deny that Die in that outfit was a definite turn on to him. "Indeed… shame on you..." 

He smirked a little at the "big" statement, his pride fluffing up a bit. That was quickly forgotten though as Die's talented mouth started on him, drawing a low, deep moan from his lips. 

Die let out a moan around his dick, relaxing his throat a moment later and sliding his cock all the way into his mouth, though he didn't go all the way down on him, just filling his mouth. He pulled back up off his dick and wet his lips. "I don't think I can take all of your dick by myself, Niimura-san. Please help me do it for you?" He plunged back onto his dick, making sure to relax his throat, waiting to be forced down.

Kyo shuddered as Die went down his dick, his hips jerking up slightly. He gazed down at the other as he spoke, a slight frown on his face. "That's too bad... but yes, I'll help you..." He reached down, lacing his fingers in Die's curled hair, letting out a moan as he pushed his head down a bit roughly. "Oh... _yes_!" 

Die intentionally made a sound that was rather like choking, though he actually wasn't, his fingers gripping Kyo's thighs harshly, his ass sticking out while he did this. In his tight lace panties, his dick was so hard, straining against the tight material. It felt so good, his pre-cum wetting the front of the panties, his cock rubbing with each little shift. He clenched around the plug in his ass, moaning as he began to forcefully bob his head on Kyo's dick, making a right show of it.

Kyo tightened his fingers, yanking Die's hair a bit as he pushed into his mouth. He could see Die's ass clearly from this viewpoint, the way it was clenching around the plug. He moaned and leaned back on one hand, spreading his legs a little as Die sucked him hard. "Oh yes… that's it... mmm what a good little _slut_ …" 

Die abruptly popped off Kyo's dick, shifting back to peer up at him, attempting to mask his action of taking out the butt plug. "Niimura-san! Oh dear, oh my!" He pushed himself to his feet. "I'm so sorry, I can't seem to make you cum this way! Please, let me try another way." He sounded desperate, almost upset by it.

Kyo gave an irritated huff as Die came off his dick, his eyes narrowing as he watched him. He sighed and crossed his arms for a moment, looking somewhat pissed. "Fine, but it better be good..."

A moment later, he pushed his panties down around his thighs, the plug removed from his ass and tossed aside, and then he backed up over Kyo's lap. He reached back and held onto his dick, pressing it to his asshole, and then sank down on it with a sigh. He shifted around once Kyo was inside him, pushing Kyo's thighs together, slipping down his panties in the process, putting one leg at a time over Kyo's lap so he was straddling him. His feet were still on the ground for leverage, his panties now dangling from one knee, the other leg free. He began to bounce on his lap, moaning loudly as he fucked himself on Kyo's dick in a very lewd fashion.

Kyo kept up his look of ire until Die settled in his lap, sliding onto his aching cock, his entrance already prepped and ready to go. "Fuck..." He let Die adjust him the way he wanted, then reached out, grasping his hips tightly. As his lover began moving over him, he let out a loud moan, pushing his hips up to meet Die's downward bounces. "Oh... oh God..." 

Die reached down to grasp Kyo's legs in front of himself, using him for leverage as well, bending over more so Kyo could see what he was sticking his dick into. "Oh god, Niimura-san!" He almost screamed out, rapidly fucking himself on Kyo's dick. "Oh fuck! Oh god, your fucking cock inside me feels so good!" His dick bounced against the inside of his outfit, rubbing there so deliciously, so gently in comparison to his rapid movements on Kyo's dick. His balls were already so tight, drawn up close to his body. He knew he could cum without a single touch if he kept this up. He paused for a moment, only the tip of Kyo's dick in his ass, wiggling around a little bit and then plunging back down on him with a loud moan as Kyo's dick slid right over his prostate from that angle. It felt so fucking good.

Kyo held onto Die, looking down once the other moved forward. He could see his cock disappearing into his lover's sweet ass, the sight of it making him moan. Finally, he couldn't stand it anymore and reached around Die, sliding his hand under the skirt to grasp his dick, finding it rock hard. "Fuck right it does... hnng... that's it, slut, fuck yourself on my cock." 

All it took was Kyo's hand on his dick and the word slut from his lips. He threw back his head and cried out Kyo's given name as he started to cum, splattering the inside of his outfit with it and the floor below them as well. He fucked himself on Kyo harder, even more eager for it if that were even possible, desperately wanting what he was being given. "Oh god, oh god, oh god!" He whined, pushing himself back on Kyo a bit more, clamping his legs as he moved faster. From between gritted teeth, he hissed out, "Keep jacking me off, I'm gonna fucking cum again... oh jesus _fuck_!" Intentionally, he began to ram himself down on Kyo's dick, hitting that sweet spot inside himself every single time.

Kyo held onto Die's hip with one hand, pushing up into him harder and harder as he came, the clenching of his asshole around his dick almost bringing him to the edge. He held back though, not wanting to end it just yet and when Die told him he was going to cum again, he just jerked him harder and faster. "Yes, fuck... cum again… you fucking needy _SLUT_!" 

Die's cries became louder and louder, his actions more and more sloppy as he moved. At long last, he felt it coming, the heat exploding in his groin and then the release just after. This time when he came, he bucked forward, into Kyo's hand, eager to fuck the hole his fist formed as he came, his body spasming around Kyo's dick as he moved. "Oh, _yeah_!" He huffed out a desperate sound as his cum spurted out of him all over the floor, some of it splattering up to hit the dresser in front of him.

Kyo let out an inhuman sound as Die reached his peak for the second time, the actions of his body finally proving too much for him. He barely had a chance to let Die finish before he grabbed his hips and slammed up into him in several quick strokes before letting out his own cry of pleasure as he blissfully fell off the edge, filling Die's body up with his offering. "Oh… G--FUCK!" 

Die sort of collapsed back against Kyo once the other was done, panting a bit harshly, everything sort of swimming before his eyes. With a little huff of a laugh, he murmured, "Did I do well, Niimura-san?"

Kyo shuddered, holding onto Die's hip, his breathing labored. "Oh... you did... incredibly well..." He managed a soft chuckle as he shifted slightly, leaning forward to press a kiss to Die's shoulder. "God..." 

Die whimpered a little and pushed back into him, feeling the last little bit of his cum dribble off his cock and onto the floor. He didn't want to move, didn't want to lose Kyo's cock inside him, even if it was going soft. He shivered a little. "Came so hard."

Kyo groaned softly, flexing his cock a little, his hand sliding up over Die's stomach, pulling him back further. "Mmhm... so good..."


	26. Chapter 26

Things had been going fairly smoothly since the holidays with everything in Die's life. Recording was going nicely and even though his time with Kyo during waking hours was running sort of short, he still had a wonderful feeling about everything. The days slipped past and finally they were done with the song they'd been working on. And to make it that much better it was only noon when Die placed his guitar down, having just put the finishing touches on the last thing they needed before Kaoru's final go-over, which he didn't need any of them around for.

Die didn't even bother being discreet about it at all, he just walked right over to Kyo, who was currently bent over his bag packing some items into it and leaned down, sliding his arms around his waist and nuzzling against his shoulder. He turned his head and whispered softly in his ear. "I hope you didn't have any urgent plans today because I've known all week what I wanted to do when we finished."

The vocalist jumped a little when Die's arms slipped around him, having been deeply within his own thoughts. He was fatigued and his throat was sore from the strain of recording, but he was definitely pleased with how it had gone. He had been running over the last minute details in his mind when Die had come over to him. He smiled and reached up, running his hands over Die's arms. "Oh? And what's that?"

Die pecked his cheek lightly before pulling away so Kyo could straighten up. He readjusted his own bag on his shoulder and pushed a hand through his still-red hair. "Mmm... you'll see, I promise."

Kyo blushed a little, catching sight of one of the staff smirking in their direction. He zipped up his bag and straightened himself up properly. "Well, then, I'm all done here so let's go..." He was eager to see what Die had planned. It suddenly seemed like too long since they'd had time for more than a quick screw. 

Die reached to take Kyo's hand and tugged him along with him toward the door. When they reached the elevator, he let go of his hand, knowing it wasn't acceptable outside of their building. They got in and made the trip to the ground floor and out to where Die had parked his car, having felt like driving for the day. He slipped into the car and got buckled up and put the music on a channel he liked before he turned on the car and glanced at Kyo. "Want to get some sushi or something to go on the way home?"

Kyo squeezed Die's hand when it wrapped around his own. He carried a little smile on his lips even as his hand was dropped. He followed Die out to the car and settled in, fastening his seat belt. "Eh, how about something quick, like ramen?" 

Die nodded. "Sounds good." He knew a little place with pork fried rice and ramen that was always really fast when he needed them to be. He hit the bluetooth button on his dash and waited on it to ask him who he wanted to call and he spoke the name of the shop clearly. It dialed and a minute later the phone was answered. "Yeah, I'd like a to go order. Pork fried rice and-" he looked pointedly at Kyo for him to order.

Kyo hummed a little and leaned back in his seat. When Die started ordering and asked him what he wanted, he gave it a half a thought then decided. "Ramen, salt flavor." 

Die quickly finished up the conversation, ordering some spring rolls and that was the end of it. He disconnected the call and smirked a little. "I hope you're ready for the overly romantic me tonight."

Kyo looked over at Die and smiled, reaching over to rub Die's leg. "Mmm, romantic Die, huh? I think I can deal."

Die chuckled softly as he navigated the streets toward their first goal. It took them another twenty minutes to get to the little shop. He rushed in to get the to-go order and then came back out with it in record time. He slipped back into the car and handed over the bag to Kyo.

Kyo watched the scenery pass by as they drove, his thoughts half on the recording and half on what Die had planned as far as romance went. 

When he was handed the bag of take-out, the smell of food hit his nose and his stomach gave a loud growl. "Whoa... shouldn't have skipped lunch I guess." 

Die snickered softly and shook his head a little. "Guess you shouldn't have." He pursed his lips as he made a turn and then headed down the last street toward their apartment complex. He had some major things to discuss with Kyo and he honestly wasn't sure how the other would feel about it, but it was something that was necessary.

Kyo laughed lightly then spent the rest of the ride with his mouth watering over their dinner. When they finally got home, he quickly exited the car, setting the food on the roof then slinging his bag over his shoulder. "Glad to be home." 

Die got out and stretched a bit, yawning and then smirking at his lover. "I'm glad we're home, too, trust me." He picked up his bag and pulled out the cable he had needed to bring home as well. 

A few minutes brought them up from the car park to their home and soon enough he was inside and headed for the living room. Plopping down on a pillow next to the table, he shrugged off his bag and tossed the cable toward his amp, patting the table. "Food, come to daddy."

Kyo followed along with Die and once they were in their apartment, he quickly shed his shoes and bag and took the food over to the table, setting it in front of Die. "Do you want beer or tea to drink?"

"Water, actually." He reached for the bag and quickly pulled out all the items within and put them out on the table, making sure Kyo had a pillow next to his to sit on, ensuring his lover would sit there rather than anywhere else.

Kyo nodded and went to the kitchen to get Die's water and a bottle of tea for himself. He came back and noticed the pillow right next to Die and smiled, moving to settle himself on it. He set their drinks on the table and leaned over to press his lips to Die's cheek before moving to grab some chopsticks. He murmured a little word of thanks and dug in, going for a spring roll first. 

Die shot a look at Kyo and smiled. His lover's little habits were all so adorable and it made him feel nice when he noticed the little things. He immediately attacked his rice with gusto, obviously a very hungry man at the moment.

Kyo finished off his spring roll and moved to pick up his ramen, sipping from the bowl first then eating at the noodles and pork inside it. He ate steadily and soon he was picking out the last bits of nori from the bottom of his bowl. He drank the remaining broth and set it down with a satisfied sigh. "Not bad for take-out..." 

"It's one of my oldest secrets." He chuckled as he finished off the rice and the last bite of his spring roll. Downing half a bottle of water, he shifted a little and pulled his laptop out from under the table and put it out in front of them, clearing the trash off to the side. Signing in, he pulled up his browser window and opened a website, pushing the laptop a bit toward Kyo. "I've... been doing some research on um... well, here."

Kyo laughed softly and sipped from his tea before settling back, leaning against Die's side a little. When his lover pulled out his laptop, he opened his mouth to say something about internet porn not being romantic, but then it was pushed in front of him and he was greeted with a page of condos, townhouses and actual homes for sale. He stared at it then looked up at Die, his heart doing an odd little flip-flop. "Are you saying... that you want to buy a house together?" 

Die pursed his lips a little and then huffed out the breath he'd been holding. "Yeah... I've been doing research on the sly ever since we made our announcement." He blushed a little and chuckled. "You know all those times I slammed it shut when you came in the room and just looked guilty? Yeah... only once was that porn."

Kyo glanced back at the page, scrolling down some, letting out a little laugh. He shifted a bit closer to Die, biting his lip a little as he stared at the numerous options available, some well within their budget, some a bit too high, but still doable. "I have to admit... I've considered it... considered getting our own place..."

"I know that I consider here to be my home, but... I think it'd be nice to officially have somewhere that starts out as 'us'. There's just a completely different feel to it." 

Kyo smiled softly and nodded, his pulse still thumping a bit hard in his chest. The very idea of getting a house together seemed so very permanent, despite the fact that they were already engaged. He glanced down at their laced fingers, returning the pressure he felt. "I agree... it would be _our's_ and something... something that we've built and worked for together." 

Die reached to take Kyo's hand and squeezed it. "Do you know I've never even contemplated doing this with anyone else in the past?"

The vocalist licked his lips, squeezing Die's hand again. "Never before?"

Die shook his head a little and looked straight into Kyo's eyes. "Never before. Kyo... you are everything to me. If I had to make a choice, you or Dir en grey, I'd throw everything else away." He lowered his voice, the undertone of it very final. "If I had to chose between my life or yours and someone forced me to die or you would, I'd slit my own throat without any hesitation. And I'm not just saying that. You are everything to me. I can't see myself without you and I've never been happier in my life than I have been since I've been with you."

Kyo stared at Die as he spoke, his chest squeezing painfully at his words. When the other was silent again, he didn't respond with words at first but instead leaned forward and cupped Die's face, pressing a tender kiss to his lips. "It wouldn't matter if you died to save my life. I'd follow you even in death because there is no way I could ever live without you."

The words struck Die with the force of a physical blow. He wrapped his arms around Kyo and tugged him fully into his arms, showering kisses over his hair, tears slipping down his cheeks and onto Kyo. "Let's never talk about death again, shall we?" he asked in a slightly shaky voice.

Kyo swallowed hard as Die was suddenly clinging to him and he found himself griping the other tightly, shaking his head, his voice coming out in a broken whisper. "Never..." 

Die struggled, trying to get himself back in control. He reached to wipe his tears away, offering Kyo a watery smile. "You know you're everything to me?"

Kyo brought his hand up to stroke over Die's cheek, smiling a little. "Ditto." He sniffed faintly and shifted back, taking hold of Die's hand as he went back to looking at the computer screen. "So, uhm... so which ones are your favorites so far?" 

"Go to the top. There's a little town house that's just adorable." He shifted closer, pressing his thigh to Kyo's own, playing with Kyo's ring.

Kyo smiled at the feeling of Die toying with his ring, he shifted his thumb to brush over Die's then scrolled up to where Die was talking about. Seeing the townhouse, he clicked on it to make the image bigger and to reveal a house-plan. He sat quietly for a moment as he tried to envision them living there, arranging their furniture, even which room would their music room. After a minute of silence, he turned to look at Die with a smile. "I think it's perfect..." 

Die watched as Kyo scrolled back up to the top and looked over the floor plan and the pictures of the inside and outside of the home. He waited on the verdict, wondering if it was too big. It was a bit presumptuous, given how small most homes in Tokyo were, to want to have something that was three bedrooms, one and a half bath, with a full living room and kitchen. And the fact that it had a small patio and a back yard, too? He'd figured he was pushing it far too much with something so huge, though it was two stories and higher than it was wide. 

He gaped at Kyo when he said it was perfect. "You... you honestly think so?" He looked a bit flustered. "I thought maybe it'd be too Americanized for you."

Kyo licked his lips and pointed to one of the bedrooms that was on the first floor rather than the second with the others. "We could make that the tatami room... and here..." He pointed to the open area on the top floor. "This could be our music area..." It was true that the house was rather large and definitely Americanized but somehow, he found he didn't mind. 

Die leaned forward and watched what all Kyo was pointing out and what they'd do with things. He pondered on it for a little bit and then reached to take control of the mouse. He went back a page and scrolled to the second option, opening it and glancing at Kyo. "Just as a second option, because we shouldn't make rash decisions." This one was a bit smaller, two bed, one bath, a small yard and porch area still and the inside was a bit more traditionally set up, having the sunken area for a traditional table in the dining area, and best of all it featured both a walk in glass shower and a more traditional build of covered tub, along with a bidet and toilet rather than a combo unit.

Kyo couldn't help but have his eyes light up at the next house, traditional Japanese style to it reminding him of homes in Kyoto. He shifted a bit and looked closer at this one, imagining the table they were sitting at right then in the sunken area. "It's smaller but....." 

Die gave him a brilliant smile and nudged him with his knee. "But?"

Kyo glanced at Die then back to the house. "Well... I have to admit to liking the traditional style just a touch more..." He laughed a little, moving to grab the mouse, zooming in on one of the rooms.

"I thought you might. It's my second favorite and I thought for sure it screamed Kyo when I found it. And... it's actually not outside the realm of my savings account."

"Nor mine... it wouldn't completely break us..." He studied it a bit more then clicked on the attached neighborhood map, surveying the area and such. "Look, there's a convenience store just down the street and it isn't very far from work." 

"Mmmhmm, I tried to get things that would be convenient for us as well as nice. I figured why not." He leaned against his side and slid his arm around Kyo's waist, moving to gently kiss the side of his head.

Kyo took a moment to lean into Die's touch, letting his eyes slide closed as he imagined setting up each house. "Either one would be good..."

Die gently turned Kyo's face to his own, studying his lover while his eyes were closed like this. He loved seeing him like this. He leaned in and pressed his lips to Kyo's own in a reverent sort of manner. Without backing up from it, he murmured, "Then we'll go with this one, because the look on your face is amazing."

Kyo didn't open his eyes until Die spoke again, his words murmured against his lips. He smiled softly and returned the gentle kiss, reaching up to stroke his fingers lightly through Die's hair. "If it works for you, Koi... then it works for me. We could live in a shack by the sea and I'd still be happy." 

Die reached to take a handful of Kyo's hair at the nape of his neck, tilted his head back and gave in to the oddest urge he had to lick from the dip of his collarbone all the way up to his chin. He pulled back with a satisfied look and smirked at him. "Shack by the sea it is then!" He chuckled.

Kyo's breath hitched a little at Die's tongue lapping at his skin. Giving a little shiver he laughed lightly and shook his head. "Fine. We can have all the fresh fish in the world... 24/7!" 

Die made a gagging sound and then laughed. "On second thought, no thank you. This house will do just fine."

Kyo grinned then all out tackled Die, pushing him back and kissing him hard and deep. When he lifted his head, he smirked down at his lover a little. "You're amazing, you know that?" 

Die let out a little yelp as he fell back on the floor, but the moment Kyo started kissing him like that, he responded with equal fervor. It wasn't something you just ignored, Kyo kissing you like that. He shuddered a little and arched up toward him. And when Kyo pulled back, he whined a little. The words helped though and he chuckled. "Mmm... you are, too."

Kyo gave another small smile then returned to kissing his lover, needing to be connected to him. His chest was bursting with joy at the very thought of them taking yet another step to being together for a very long time and once again, he was feeling like the luckiest man on earth. 

Die ran his hands over Kyo's back and then to his biceps, lightly squeezing. After a moment, he sneaked his fingers up under Kyo's armpits and attempted tickling him for the first time in all these years, just to see what would happen.

Kyo was slowly becoming aroused as Die's hands ran over him... that was until the other's fingers were tickling his armpits and he was letting out the most unmanly squeal. "Oh! No... Die! St-stop it!" He squirmed to get away, looking rather ruffled. 

Die immediately turned the tables, flopping Kyo onto his back on the floor and sitting astride him, trying his sides and his armpits at intervals, a gleeful look on his face.

Kyo struggled, but the way Die had him pinned down, he might as well have been a turtle on its back. Letting out more squeaks and yelps, he tried to reach up to catch Die's hands. "You... AH! Basta--gaah... bastard!" He was trying his best to look angry, but he kept giggling instead. 

Die relented for a moment, letting him have a breather. But it was only a short moment before he attacked again, this time with renewed vigor. He leaned down over him and lightly kissed his nose before whispering out, "Adorable... cute... could just eat you up, my sweet."

Kyo let out a huff of breath when Die relented, but it was short break and soon he was wriggling again, his legs kicking up some. When Die kissed his nose and called him adorable, he responded with a growl and took Die's distraction to his advantage and finally was able to flip his lover off of him and onto his back. "You can bite me..." 

Die smirked up at him, his eyes glittering. "Mmm... yes please?"

Kyo snorted and leaned down, taking his revenge by biting Die's nipple through his shirt. 

Die let out a squeal that was far less manly than Kyo's had been and swatted lightly at Kyo's head.

Kyo chuckled and lifted his head. "So, tell me Dai~suke, are _you_ ticklish?" 

Die's eyes narrowed a little as he peered up at Kyo. "Try it and you might get more than you bargained for." He cleared his throat. "Let me put it this way, have mercy on me for approximately four minutes and then I'll come back and submit to whatever you want."

Kyo raised an eyebrow, running his hand down Die's chest and over his abdomen. "Oh~? And what happens in four minutes, hmm?" 

Die's face flushed a little and he lightly pushed at Kyo. "In four minutes, you do whatever you want. In the meantime, I'm trying not to ruin the romance with certain things."

Kyo licked his lips then grinned, leaning down to peck Die's lips softly before relenting and moving off of him, holding out his hand to help him up. "Very well, four minutes... five minutes... a hundred years, I'd wait an eternity for you." 

Die took the offered hand and stood up, quickly heading off to the bathroom. Once inside, he made fast work of relieving himself and washing up. A minute later, he came back and settled down right where he had been. "Okay, less than four minutes, now I'm good."

Kyo watched Die go, chuckling softly as he heard the bathroom door shut. He took the minute to get a drink of his tea then stood there, waiting. 

When Die came back and settled where he'd been before, Kyo kneeled beside him and leaned down to kiss him tenderly rather than torture him with tickles, though he did slip his hand under his shirt and brush the pads of his fingers over his flat tummy. 

Die looked up at Kyo, fully expecting to be tickle attacked. After a moment, he blinked a little and then arched a bit toward his hand against his stomach. Normally he didn't like people touching him there or even looking at his stomach, but with Kyo it was somehow different. He had nothing to hide with his lover.

Kyo smiled a little and shifted to tug Die's shirt up, moving to place soft little kisses and nips to the area. He could see the look in his lover's eyes, the one that spoke of insecurities and it made him angry. How anyone could ever call Die anything but too thin was beyond him. 

The guitarist shivered a little as Kyo started in on kissing him there. He let out a soft whine, arching up toward him and closing his eyes, reaching to put his hand on the back of Kyo's head. "Baby..."

Kyo dipped his tongue into Dies belly button then pushed his shirt up further, kissing a trail of exposed skin until he couldn't go any further. He abandoned Die's chest for his lips, kissing him deeply. "I love you."

Die looked up into his lover's face and let out a soft little sound, a light flush across his cheeks and chest, betraying his arousal the way his cock wasn't just yet. "I love you, too, baby... so very much."

Kyo brushed his hand over Die's face then sat astride him, smoothing over his chest and stomach, along his sides, just rubbing him.

Die shivered a little bit, drawing his lower lip between his teeth and lightly chewing on it. He'd intended to keep his hands to himself tonight, but he supposed that he still was. It was Kyo who was initiating this, not him. He closed his eyes, a tiny smirk on his face. Truth was... maybe Kyo wasn't leading this to sex, one never knew. And maybe it'd be more romantic if it went somewhere else, a massage, a little make-out session without sex at the end. Something. He opened his eyes again and smiled up at Kyo.

Kyo smiled down at his lover, watching his face as he closed his eyes. When they were open again, Kyo shifted and leaned down to nuzzle against Die's neck, pressing light kisses to his pulse point. "My heart beats for you." 

Die peered up at his lover and gave him a cute little smile as he reached to place his hand over Kyo's chest, feeling his heart beating there. "It does... it sings me the song of ultimate love."

Kyo moved off of Die but just to the side of him so he could wrap his arms around his sweet lover, not caring that they were on the living room floor. "My beautiful Koi..." He cupped Die's face and pressed their lips together, one of his hands moving to push into Die's silky hair. 

Die shifted slightly toward Kyo, rolling a bit on his side to reach him better. He rested one hand on Kyo's hip and returned the kiss with equal gentleness, beaming happily once he pulled back, just peering into his lover's eyes. "You make me so happy... I can't even describe it."

Kyo petted at Die's hair, shifting so that there was barely any space between them. "You don't have to... I can see it shining in your eyes." 

Die's tongue poked out ever so slightly from between his lips before he grinned and leaned in to kiss Kyo's nose. "You know what?"

Kyo let out a little laugh and scrunched up his nose when Die kissed it. He ran his hand over the other's side and raised his eyebrows. "What?" 

"We'd make teeth rot right now, we're being so friggin romantic." He chuckled, pushing Kyo's hair back a bit and then ruffling it. "But I wouldn't care if the world were watching, I'd still be doing this."

Kyo shook his head, a bit grin on his face as he reached down and pinched Die's butt lightly. "Are you kidding? My own teeth are rotting... but I don't care..." He turned serious for a moment. "As long as I'm with you, I can take on anything." 

"And this is why I love you." He leaned in and kissed his lips once more. "One of a bazillion reasons."

Kyo found himself blushing a little and kissed Die again to hide it. His lover never failed to make him feel like he was on top of the world. All of the sadness, pain, and darkness that filled his soul most of his life was seemingly gone, pushed out by the blinding light of his love for Die. "A bazillion and one..." 

Die flopped over onto his back and just grinned up at the roof. "I cannot think of anywhere I'd rather be than here and that's saying a lot, so be proud."

Kyo watched Die then scooted over to him and wrapped his arm around his waist, closing his eyes. "I am..." He stayed like that until he felt paws batting at his hand. He cracked an eye open to see Snowball attacking his fingers that were resting on Die's chest. "Hm... I think someone is jealous.." 

Die turned his head when Kyo spoke again and peered at Snowball, looking around until he found the kitten, flopped upside down and attempting to kill a little pink ball. He reached for Snowball and scratched her between the ears. "Hey, cute stuff."

Kyo smiled when Die spoke to the kitten and she gave a little "mew" in response. He found Die's other hand and squeezed it tightly. "I love you, Daisuke." 

Die made a kissy face at Snowball and continued to pet her, looking back at Kyo and smiling. "Love you, too, glitterbug." He made a face. "That sounded way better in my head."

Kyo was about to smile when it occurred to him that Die had called him 'glitterbug'. He blinked a few times and let out a snort. "You're confusing me with Kaoru..." 

Die burst out laughing, tilting his head back and having a real good go of it. Finally, he got ahold of himself and shook his head. "Ah... those pants were special, weren't they?"

Kyo chortled with Die, eventually holding his side as he took a few breaths. "Very... I'm waiting on him to get disco-ball pants next... especially with Toshiya influencing him." 

"God... Kaoru was bad enough on his own with the fashion, he didn't need 'help'." He carefully air-quoted the help part, making it very obvious he meant that in the most sarcastic way possible.

"I know... the next tour is going to be... special." The vocalist snorted then sat up, looking back at Die. "Come snuggle with me in bed..."

Die got up from the floor, picking up Snowball and taking her with him to the bedroom. He placed her on the foot of the bed and then quickly emptied his pockets of sharp things he didn't want to lay on before flopping down on the comforter.

Kyo followed along, smiling as Snowball curled up in a little ball. He shifted onto the bed and crawled over to Die, plastering himself against his side.


	27. Chapter 27

They'd finally started another tour, the days since they'd last been on stage far in the past and Die had been more than impatient for the night they'd return. When at long last, they finally had, it was like he'd been reborn. He was amazingly bouncy and energetic, his face brilliantly lit and his eyes full of vitality. His smile was wider, more truth and less lie. And honestly, it had affected him every single other way as well, strengthening his resolve on a number of things.

Tonight, for example, he'd gone to the gym for a full two hours, one cardio and one weights. Afterward, he'd taken a fifteen minute massage and an amazing bath in the attached onsen. Fully pleased with himself and endorphins still pumping from the work-out, Die arrived back at his and Kyo's apartment. He tossed his gym bag into the alcove with their laundry and padded through the house, looking for his lover. Tonight was going to be amazing. He already had it planned out. Take Kyo to dinner, woo him in the best of fashions, and then bring him home and have at him in all the various ways that he'd been dreaming up since the last time they'd had sex.

The start of a new tour meant several things for Kyo. Unfortunately, one of those things was a great deal of personal stress over how his voice would react to being used in all the ways he tended to use it while on stage. He'd been doing more vocal therapy than before and had even gone so far as to procure a prescription of pain killers, though he despised the things. It wasn't all bad though, not in the least. He was finally back to being who he _was_. He was starting to feel himself again. 

However, with all of the added stress, he was feeling a lot more exhausted and the past week had left him with little energy to spare save for that which he expelled on stage. So, when his happy and energetic lover came bouncing into the bedroom, it was to find him sprawled out on their bed on his stomach. He didn't move when heard Die's footsteps, just grunting in response instead.

Die paused just inside the doorway to the bedroom, peering down at Kyo's sprawled out form. He deflated a little bit, knowing this meant Kyo was definitely exhausted tonight. A little worried crease filled the area between his eyebrows and he held in the sigh he wanted to give. It'd been a little over a week and Kyo was always tired, so Die hadn't even tried to do anything with him, afraid of the rejection that would likely be associated with it.

He squared his shoulders after a moment. Maybe this didn't have to be so bad, though. He could make dinner instead, set out the romantic spread, and let Kyo nap in the meantime. That'd give him roughly two hours of sleep before the meal, a little more if he made it something he had to go shopping to get. Then they'd eat and Kyo would be rested enough for what Die had planned for later. 

His smile renewed itself and he made his way over to the bed. Settling on one knee on the bed, he ran his hand through Kyo's short hair, ruffling the shaved bits because it always felt so cool against his fingertips. "Hey, baby... I'm gonna make us dinner. You nap until then, okay?"

Kyo could feel Die watching him and was about to turn over and ask what was up when he felt the mattress dip and then Die's hand in his hair. A little smile crossed his lips as fingers stroked over the sheared area of his hair. He nodded and murmured out an, "Okay," briefly reaching back to pat at Die's leg before closing his eyes again and already starting to doze back off.

Die stayed a little while longer, just gently petting Kyo's hair, enjoying the feel and the way his lover dozed under his hands. After a few minutes, he carefully got up, in a manner that wouldn't disturb Kyo in the least. Padding out of the room, he made his way to the living room where he settled on the couch and browsed through the app on his phone for recipe ideas for the night.

Kyo rolled over and started to slip into a deeper sleep as the night wore on, forgetting that Die was going to cook and opting instead to content himself with dreamland. Even as he did, he felt a little guilty leaving his lover to his own devices for the last several nights but he was just too tired to do much else other than crash into bed.

Die finally decided on making an Italian dish that sounded amazing, knowing Kyo didn't mind his tendency to experiment around with other types of food. He spent a little over an hour on the trip to the grocery store, then another hour preparing the sauce and the chicken to go in the pasta, the last fifteen minutes involving the pasta and getting wine out for them, setting up the table with a candle in the center, and taking a really fast e-cigarette smoke break. 

By the time he was done, he was very proud of himself. He stood back and looked at the food and the layout, smiling, he dimmed the lights and then plodded down the hallway to wake Kyo up.

The smell of food cooking kept filtering into Kyo's dreams, finally waking him as his stomach gave a loud, protesting growl, informing him it was quite empty. He huffed a little and sat up, pushing his hand through his hair and looking around the dark bedroom, eyes squinting a little as he tried to focus them. He looked up as Die came in and offered a little wave of his hand before yawning widely and stretching, standing afterward. "Smells good, is it ready?"

Die smiled when he saw his lover sitting up, definitely looking like he had just woken up. "Yes, it is. Go wash up and then come eat." He smiled, gently cupping Kyo's cheek in his hand before he moved off toward the door again, looking pleased with himself.

Kyo blinked a little at Die's attitude, but shrugged it off and stood, padding towards the bathroom to take a quick piss and wash his hands and face. As an afterthought, he picked up his comb and ran it through his hair, though it only helped a little. He finished up and wandered down the hall to the kitchen, his mouth dropping a little at the spread Die had set out. "Wow... you've been busy. How long was I asleep?"

"Around two and a half hours," Die murmured, looking up when Kyo came into the kitchen. He pushed away from the counter he'd been leaning against and reached to pull his chair out for him. "Welcome to Die's Diner."

Kyo smiled a little and moved to sit down in the offered chair, blushing a little as his stomach made it well known that he was more than ready to eat. "Looks fantastic."

Die pushed Kyo's chair in and went to his own, sitting down and picking up his fork. "I hope it tastes as good as it looks and smells, that's all I can say." He lifted is fork and then dug in, hesitating on the first bite and then pushing it into his mouth. It was so good he actually groaned. Apparently he'd found a damn good recipe for it.

Kyo settled down and dug into his own food, humming appreciatively as the flavors burst in his mouth. He had to admit, Die had done a damn good job. He spent the next several moments in silence, stuffing his face a little faster than necessary.

Die made his way through his meal with an easy sort of silence, not really needing to talk, the air between him and Kyo very well established already. He only spoke when he got up to clear away their dishes. "I have green tea and plum wine ice cream, which do you want?" He glanced back at the other as he placed their dishes in the sink.

Kyo leaned back after he'd finished his plate, rubbing his stomach slightly. It was already pretty full, but the sound of the ice cream appealed to him. "Mm, plum wine sounds good to me." He gave Die a smile, reaching to take a sip of his wine that he'd nearly forgotten. He was never really big on the drink. but occasionally, usually at Die's request, he drank it with the right meal and it was generally pleasant enough in those cases.

The redhead was quick to make sure that he had two small bowls of ice cream in front of them as soon as possible. He gave Kyo a small spoon and settled down with his own, having chosen the same purplish red delight. He ate at it slowly, savoring the taste, smiling softly at Kyo over the light of the candle flickering in the center of the table. "Your voice has been doing really well," he offered.

Kyo took a bite of the sweet treat before answering Die, mming softly at the taste. He set his spoon down and licked his lips, nodding a little. "It feels like it has been... even though I'm paranoid something is going to go horribly wrong."

"It doesn't sound like it's going to do anything bad like before," Die offered. "Has it hurt at all?" He took another spoonful of his chilled treat, licking the spoon clean in a purposely sinful sort of manner, hoping to catch and hold Kyo's attention on it, to get his intentions clear before they arrived at the bedroom and it came out of nowhere.

The vocalist was completely oblivious to Die's attempts at being seductive, focusing instead on eating his ice cream. After a moment, he set the spoon down again and cocked his head, licking his lips some. "Well, no, hurt isn't the right word. It's more like... tender. If that makes sense."

Die nodded a little. "Yeah, that definitely makes sense, I suppose it wouldn't just be perfectly okay all at once." He made a little face. "Just promise me you won't go pushing it too far. Everyone will understand if you need to take another break for a bit rather than push it to breaking again."

Kyo shook his head, reaching out to pat Die's hand in a slightly reassuring manner. "I'm fine. I know my limits... now." He sniffed a little and finished off his dessert with a sigh. "Besides, we can't take another break and you know it."

"No, I don't know it. If you need it, we do it. Period." He ate the last bite of his treat and put that dish in the sink as well, coming back over to the table and blowing out the candle, leaning his hip on the table and reaching to gently run his fingers over Kyo's cheek and jaw. "We all care about you, Kyo."

Kyo gazed up at Die through the swirling smoke of the snuffed candle, leaning into this touch. He gave a little nod and shrugged one shoulder. "I know. But honestly, I'm fine."

"Good," Die murmured, concentrated on something else entirely now. He wanted his lover and he'd been patiently waiting the whole week, not even trying to get in his pants until now. He shifted closer, his hand sliding over Kyo's throat for a moment. With a smile, he slid around behind him and began to give him a shoulder massage, his eyes bright and his face radiant from the single glass of wine he'd ingested.

The vocalist swallowed as his lover's hand rested on his throat briefly, shivering faintly at the contact. Die moved then and he was about to ask where he was off to when a pair of warm hands descended onto his shoulders, pulling a quiet groan from his lips. 

Perhaps he should have listened to Kaoru and gotten that massage after all because what Die was doing was hitting all kinds of knots he didn't really think he'd had.

Die stood there behind his lover, moving his hands over all the tight spots on his lover's shoulders and back. He spent a good fifteen minutes massaging him before his fingers started to ache from the power he was putting into it. He began to lightly rub at his back instead, his heart beating faster, getting worked up over the idea of where he was leading this. By the time he lightly patted Kyo's shoulder, he was already half hard in his pants and desperate to get Kyo into the bedroom... or really, anywhere with a flat semi-soft surface.

Kyo leaned forward and almost melted into the chair as Die worked his muscles. He was tempted to ask his lover to do a full-out body massage, but he could tell his hands were getting tired and he didn't want to push him given that he needed them for guitar playing. 

When Die stopped, he glanced up at him, eyebrow raised in question. It didn't take him long to figure out the look in his lover's eyes though and it made him almost frown. He had no drive or energy for sex at the moment, an unfortunate side effect of the stress he'd been feeling. He hadn't even masturbated in several days.

Die smiled at his lover and lightly ruffled his hair. He shifted himself around to settle against the table in front of Kyo and then lightly rubbed at Kyo's shoulder and then down over his chest. Leaning in, he pressed his lips to Kyo's own, trying to be romantic and soft about it, despite the growing need he felt inside, despite how hard his dick was rapidly becoming. His fingers lightly caressed over Kyo's chest as he kissed him, making idle patterns, not pushing for anything yet, but working up to it.

Kyo reached up and stroked a hand over Die's arm, returning the kiss gently, not taking it any further than he had to. He shifted a bit and leaned back, letting Die touch his chest, a little sound escaping him.

When Die pulled back from the kiss, he smiled at Kyo, reaching for the buttons on his shirt, starting to open the top few buttons. He didn't want to say anything that would chance ruining the mood, so instead, he slipped his hand inside his shirt and let out a soft little sound as he thumbed one nipple, his free hand still trying to undo Kyo's shirt.

Kyo licked his lips as Die started unbuttoning his shirt. He'd been afraid that this was where it'd been heading but still, he didn't want to say anything just yet in case his lover was simply teasing him. He squirmed a little uncomfortably at the touch to his nipple though, but tried to look like it wasn't bothering him.

Die took the squirm as a good sign, swinging one leg over Kyo's legs and settling on his lap. He undid the rest of his shirt and pushed his hands along Kyo's ribs, leaning in and kissing him a bit harder, letting some of his desperation seep in this time. Somewhere in the back of his mind, a tiny nagging thought told him that Kyo wasn't responding to him like normal, that something was different... off. But he tried his best to ignore it, figuring it the byproduct of a week of not so much as seeing Kyo naked for more than a few seconds as his lover changed.

Kyo tried, really tried to convince his body to behave, to respond to Die's touches. He kissed him back, trying to be passionate about it. He rested his hands on Die's thighs as they kissed, feeling the other's desperation. He ignored his body's lack of response for now, hoping that a little more would at least push him into feeling like doing something pleasurable with Die.

Eventually, Die couldn't stand it anymore, he pulled back from the kiss and slid his hand into Kyo's hair, lightly tugging his head back and licking up the column of his neck. He groaned faintly, rocking his hips a little to try to quell the ache trapped inside his pants. Normally Kyo would have been all over him by then and every alarm bell he had was going off inside his head, but he just kept ignoring them, convinced it was just his brain being afraid of something that wasn't the truth. "Want you so bad," he finally whispered out, lips pressed against Kyo's Adam's apple.

Kyo let out a soft sound as Die licked along his neck, the sensation only mildly affecting him. He squirmed again as Die rocked his hips, feeling his lover's obvious arousal. It was as Die voiced his need against his throat that he finally, regretfully pushed the other back, frowning. "Die... I... I can't."

Kyo's hands pushing at him gave Die pause and he slowly sat back, studying Kyo's face as he told him that he couldn't. Couldn't... what on earth did couldn't mean? His mind spiraled around the issue, trying to find the truth of the statement, figure out what it actually meant. He frowned a little as he settled on the fact that no matter what it meant, it sure as shit meant get off his lap and stop rutting against him.

He slid out of Kyo's lap and stuffed his hands in his pants, trying his best to hide his arousal, just hoping Kyo hadn't felt it at all, though it was a fruitless desire and he knew it. After a moment, he just offered, "Oh," because he still didn't know what 'couldn't' actually meant and he needed to figure that out before reacting. 

He pushed his hands deeper into his pockets, long fingers wrapping around his e-cigarette. There, that was his out. Sometimes he went outside to smoke it still, so he could escape with that. He pulled it out and shook it a little. "Out of fluid, left it outside." Awkward, awkward, AWKWARD! He could have slapped himself in the head for that, but it was out and all he could do was roll with it. He headed out of the kitchen and toward the patio. Slipping outside, he picked up the bottle off the table and made sure the door was closed before he turned his back on it and busied himself refilling the cigarette, despite it still being mostly full right then.

He swallowed a little as he put the bottle down on the railing. He put the cig to his lips and pressed the little button, inhaling the vapor. He breathed it out through his nose, his mind rolling over and over the words Kyo had spoken. His hand gripped the railing harshly, his jaw setting. Stupid... he was just fucking stupid, that's all there was to it. He should have known eventually the novelty would wear off and that he'd end up where he always did in relationships. It was always a novel concept to fuck him at first and then needs were satiated, and then... well... then it was always a downward spiral to never getting laid again.

Kyo watched with a pained expression as Die practically jumped off of his lap and stuff his hands in his pockets. He could hear the sheer disappointment in his lover's voice as he spoke. Kyo didn't know what to say in his defense to make it any better. The simple fact was that he physically and mentally couldn't have the vaguest interest in sex, it was as if his body had shut off. 

With a sigh, he watched Die go outside without another word or question or anything. He'd expected a barrage of questions, not silence. He sat still for longer than he should have before finally standing and going to the patio, opening the door then leaning against the frame. "Die..."

Die pursed his lips a little bit when he heard the glass door slide open behind him. He didn't turn around, didn't feel like displaying his shame with the fact that he was still hard. He took another drag from his cigarette as he gazed out over the city. "Yeah?" He finally asked, discarding the idea of being a total jerk and replying with Kyo's name in a sarcastic sort of way.

Kyo bit his lip as he surveyed the guitarist's tense form. Stepping out and over to Die, he placed a hand on his back, softly rubbing. "To sound... completely cliché, it's not you." He knew that probably wouldn't help a damn bit but he had to try and reassure his lover, knowing that this had to be a blow to his ego. Hell, it was a blow to his own ego.

Die almost wanted to push Kyo away when he came to touch him like this. Instead, he just remained exactly where he was, his back rigid as he took another drag off his cigarette, blowing the vapor into the air. He shrugged slightly. "Doesn't matter." A lie, but less of one than 'it's fine' would have been at least.

He picked up the bottle of fluid and tucked it into his pocket, a good reason to keep his hand there, pushing out his pants pocket just in case Kyo looked down, all he'd see was that as the reason for Die's pants being tight, not anything else. He shifted slightly, uncomfortable with not being left alone right then. He needed to work this out in his own head, needed to deal with the fact that he would probably only get some a few times year, if that, from here on out. It wasn't something he could just jump to, even after so many times that it'd happened to him in the past. But he loved Kyo and hell if wasn't going to do his best to try and make the best of this.

His mind told him over and over, he needed to find a subject to get them off of this one, something to make Kyo think he was fine, to leave him alone and not have to try to explain himself, because the last thing Die wanted was to be told Kyo didn't want him anymore, that he couldn't get hard for him or any other array of terrible things he just didn't want to hear. He finally settled on a strange flashing green light a few blocks away. He pointed. "What's that? Something going on over there?"

Kyo frowned, dropping his hand and crossing his arms against his chest. He stood there quietly, feeling so damn awkward that he wanted the earth to open up and swallow him. He had obviously hurt Die with his rejection, but he didn't know immediately how to make it better and the feeling was making him sick. 

He shifted back a step or two and sighed, getting ready to just go back inside until Die pointed out some odd green light. He moved and peered out at it, shrugging a little. "Looks like a street sweeper to me..."

Die peered at it a little more, trying to focus on that and only that for the time being. "I don't think so, there's no orange lights. Just green." He leaned on the railing, looking off in that direction, his insides knotting with agony and his outward appearance somehow only reflecting some tiny portion of that, not all of it.

Kyo stared at the light, huffing as he found it to be a bit blurry around the edges. "Maybe the traffic light is broken..." He stood back, shrugging a little then turning towards the door when he heard the phone ringing. With a sigh, he muttered, "I'll get it," and turned to head inside, feeling like a real bastard right about then. 

He answered the phone and it turned out to be their manager, who upon realizing that Kyo had actually answered the phone, insisted on asking him a bunch of questions about his throat, the shows and several promotional things he was lined up for. He responded to each question with increasing irritability, taking up pacing by the time the conversation was wrapping up.

Die stood outside for the duration of the time Kyo was on the phone, half listening and half ignoring him to get himself settled inside. The fact of the matter was that this had been inevitable. It always was and he should never have expected anything different out of any relationship. The only way he could figure it, was that he was stuck in a horrible vicious cycle. He wanted sex so badly because he kept getting cut off when he was in relationships and because he wanted it so much, he pissed off his lovers eventually to the point he wouldn't get it anymore. He let out a soft snort as he tucked his e-cigarette back in his pocket and then swallowed thickly.

But the one thing he knew for certain was that he didn't want to be without Kyo, period. If he never got to have sex again, he could - and would - live with it. Because Kyo's love meant so much more than sex. Sure, the two things were wound up in many cases, but that didn't change the fact that he could do without it.

He turned away from the balcony and made his way quickly past Kyo, who was still on the phone, and into the bathroom. He shut and locked the door, turning on the shower and quietly stripping down. Maybe he needed to go back to his old habits of hiding things in certain places that no one would look so he could slink off and relieve himself easier. Tonight, he'd have to make do with just his hand... again. But he was sure he could dig out some of his old stuff again if he just remembered where it'd all gone off to.

Kyo finally managed to get off of the phone, left irritated and annoyed by the call as well as his and Die's issues. His lover had slipped past him and into the bathroom and now Kyo could hear the shower running. He walked to the door, raising his hand to knock then dropped it, letting his forehead _thunk_ against the door instead. 

After standing there for several moments, listening to the sounds of the shower running and Die moving about, he stood upright again and headed to the bedroom, stripping down to his boxers and simply crawling into bed. Once he was lying down, he reached down to grope himself, snorting slightly. "Of all the things to go wrong..."

Die stood in the shower, letting the water run over him. He could feel the slight claw of anxiety inside of him and he fought to shove it away, disliking the sensation. The water wasn't doing anything to relax him like it usually did and he found that he was sort of annoyed he was having yet another bathing experience in the same day, this one to cover up the indiscretions he felt like a jerk for even having to start with.

Leaning back against the wall, he reached down and grabbed his dick, quickly going about his business of jerking himself off. There was no real pleasure to it, just the action that needed to be completed to give his body the relief it was seeking. Even the way he looked told everything about the moment, his jaw set in a hard line, teeth grinding, a pissed-off crease between his brows. This was his fault... his fault for pushing Kyo and wanting so much sex, his fault for having freaky desires; all his fault. He let out a huff of breath as he came, glancing down long enough to wash himself clean of the evidence of what he'd just done and turn the water off.

He dried off quickly and picked back up his clean clothing from after the gym, pulling them back on, complete with jeans and everything else. He dried the tips of his hair that had gotten wet again and then brushed his teeth and applied the lightly cologne-scented lotion that kept him from looking like he needed to shave every five minutes.

Coming out, he paused, trying to tell which direction Kyo was in, so he could go the other way and avoid any more of this terrible conversation.

Kyo heard Die come out of the shower and closed his eyes, dragging his hands over his face, waiting on him to come into the bedroom. He didn't know what he would say if he did, but maybe they could at least just settle it for the night.

Die stood there in the hallway, feeling awkward, not having any idea what on earth he was going to do. He pursed his lips a little and then sighed, frowning slightly. After a moment he sucked it up and headed into the bedroom. Kyo was there, under the covers, and he did his best to ignore him, just going to the dresser and pulling out his red silk pajama pants and on second thought, his top as well.

He ducked back out of the room to go change in the living room. He got out of his jeans and top and into the pajamas, keeping even his boxers on underneath, though he normally never did. It'd be all wound up in the morning, but maybe if he ended up with a morning surprise it'd sort of keep it trapped and Kyo wouldn't notice. He sighed, pushing his hands through his hair and tugging lightly. This sucked so bad and worse, this time he had no one he could talk to about it. He used to tell Toshiya when things went to shit on his sex life, but there was no way he was ratting out Kyo to Toshiya when they worked together. That would be a shit thing to do.

Picking up his clothing, he carefully folded them up and went back to the bedroom, placing them on his dresser and going to his side of the bed, carefully slipping under the covers, making sure he didn't brush Kyo or take up more room than he had to. Settling in, he closed his eyes and then murmured, "Night."

Kyo laid there, listening to Die open the drawer and get his pajamas out. He expected to hear him change right there, but then Die left the bedroom again and he leaned up to peer down the hall, frowning. He flopped back after a minute and sighed, closing his eyes. He didn't open them or even move when Die came back and got into bed, now in his pajamas. It really irritated Kyo that the other had gone to change in the other freaking room just over something like him not being in the mood. But, he kept it to himself and turned on his side, shifting into the position they normally started the night out with, his hand moving to rest on Die's hip though he didn't scoot in as close this time. "Night... love you."

Die's heart fluttered slightly at the fact that Kyo turned to actually spoon with him and that he put his hand on his hip like he always did. Maybe things weren't as bad as they could have been, for sure. When Kyo told him he loved him, Die moved his hand down to grasp Kyo's own, lacing their fingers and giving the room a thankful little smile. "I love you, too, my precious."

Kyo's lips curled up the slightest as Die's fingers laced with his, glad that at least he didn't jerk away or anything. He squeezed his lover's hand then closed his eyes, finally drifting asleep though the problem was still nagging in the back of his mind.

Die lay there for nearly an hour before he could relax enough to finally go to sleep, and when he did, it was horribly fitful.

\--

The next morning, Kyo awoke feeling like he hadn't really slept much at all. He had obviously tossed and turned and the covers were in a complete mess and all on Die's side of the bed. He lay there blinking and squinting the early morning sunlight, seriously considering just trying to go back to sleep. 

Unfortunately, his bladder had different ideas and he finally rolled out of bed to stumble into the bathroom. Once he got there and finished pissing, he realized his dick was half hard so he reached down with a little smirk and started stroking himself in a way built to get off quickly. 

It took him about a minute to realize that he was not getting anywhere with it, his cock only slightly harder than it was and the pleasure of it being rather elusive. With an aggravated growl, he stopped and tucked himself back in his boxers, going to wash his hands before stalking into the kitchen to make tea. He was pissed off now, this was bullshit.

Die groaned when Kyo got out of bed, the movement of the mattress making his body flop around a bit. He sighed softly, rubbing his hand over his face. He licked his lips a little and pushed his face into his pillow, trying not to listen to what Kyo was doing. He was already hard from it being the morning and having to pee himself, but it wouldn't do to get even more aroused. He knew he had this already mastered and that was all there was to it; use what he'd learned from other relationships. It was just a shame it'd happened before they were even moved into their new place... his chest ached and he frowned. No... panic attacks over this were completely unacceptable. He turned over on his belly and buried his face in the pillow, yanking the sheets up over himself and then cradling the pillow.

Kyo got his tea ready then headed back to the bedroom, getting back into bed and grabbing his laptop, going about getting it booted up and such. While he waited, he sipped at his tea, a frown creasing his brows. Once the laptop was up and running, he set his cup down a little harder than usual and started his routine of checking email, deleting most of it and responding to one or two, his fingers flying over the keys perhaps a little too hard in his irritation.

After a few minutes of Kyo clicking around and slamming his cup down, Die knew he was doomed to have to get out of bed. Kyo was obviously still pissed off, his slamming around making that obvious. He pushed himself out of the bed and plodded off toward the bathroom, snagging his jeans on the way. No point in showing his boner around because he knew well enough by now that it would take at least ten minutes to get back into a reasonable state after he was done urinating.

He pissed as quickly as he could, washed up and brushed his teeth, changing into his jeans and then padding back into the bedroom, where he began to change his pajama shirt for his tank top. "Any breakfast wants?" he asked, trying his best to be casual.

Kyo looked up as Die got out of bed, scowling a little when he didn't say anything to him. When his lover re-entered the room and asked about breakfast, he huffed out a sigh and shook his head. He figured _my dick to work_ wasn't an appropriate response. "I'm not really hungry. Didn't sleep well," he offered in way of verbal response, his eyes remaining focused on the computer screen.

Die grunted a little. "Me either." He ran his hand over his hair and sighed, looking a bit frazzled. "I'm gonna go down to the little donut shop on the corner. You sure you don't want something?"

Kyo glanced up at Die, studying him for a bit then shrugged. "You can get me my usual I guess... I might eat it later."

Die nodded and then wandered off toward the living room. He picked up his keys and phone off the charger, slipping out the door.

Within minutes, he was at the donut shop and had ordered his usual and settled at a corner booth. Finally, he relented and texted Toshiya. _"Hey, buddy... you awake yet?"_

Toshiya woke with a start, his phone vibrating against his face where he'd fallen asleep talking to Kaoru. He squinted at the text then replied. _"Uhn... yeah... sup?"_ It was the best he could do really, considering his hand was half asleep.

Die stared down at the text back from Toshiya, debating for a long moment before replying. _"Please don't read anything into this, but I think I need like... a behavioral therapist or something. Any recommendations on how to find one on the down-low? Like... anyone who might know a good number?"_

Toshiya read the text a couple of times before it sank in. He sat up and scratched his head frowning a bit. _"Well, none of my business, but why don't you use the one Kyo had that one time?"_

Die squirmed a bit at the response, hiding his screen when the waitress gave him his coffee and donut along with the bag of Kyo's to go. He thanked her and she wandered off again, Die quickly pulling his phone back from his body and re-reading it. He sighed and replied. _"Some things you just don't want to tell your lover, you know?"_

The bassist had taken the time to get up and get himself some orange juice then flopped down on his couch, curling up and nearly dozing back off. He jumped a little then read the next message, huffing slightly. _"Thought you two could tell each other everything... but yeah... wanna talk about what's up though? I don't know any therapists..."_

Die frowned a bit at the text. There was no way he was turning anyone against anyone else within the band, he'd be a total fool and an asshole. He sighed softly. _"Not really. It's just personal sexual issues is all. All me."_

Toshiya winced at the reply, shaking his head. _"Sucks dude... I'll look around, see what I can find.."_

Die grunted a little at the reply and huffed slightly. _"Thanks. Sorry if I woke you up or anything. Hope you have a good day."_ With that, he quickly ate his donut, drank his coffee, deleted his phone's message history for those messages, and then grabbed Kyo's donut bag, heading back toward the apartment, doing his best to be perfectly okay and look the part.

Once Die arrived back at the apartment, he took a deep breath, trying to decide what exactly to do. It was hard for him to do this after walking out like he had with Kyo being that irritable this morning. That wasn't how he normally was and it hurt him to think he was changing himself on that level as well as on a sexual sort of side.

Finally, he opened the door and stepped in, ditching his shoes and formulating what he'd do. He stopped by the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of iced green tea. Coming into the bedroom, he found Kyo where he'd left him, still hunched over his laptop. He settled onto the bed, trying to be nice like he usually would be, though there was still something forlorn and upset about his entire demeanor. He nudged the bag close to Kyo and then held out the tea. "Should eat something," he offered quietly.

Kyo sat in nearly the exact same position in which Die had left him. He was staring fruitlessly at his computer, searching for inspiration and finding none. He'd hoped to forget his physical issues by throwing himself into work but it looked like that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. 

When Die settled on the bed, he glanced over at him, peering at the pastry bag and tea. He sighed softly and took both, offering Die a worn smile. "Thanks," he offered as he cracked open the tea, taking a sip.

Die took even that tiny smile as some amount of hope that he could repair his mistakes somehow. He watched Kyo take a drink of his tea and then folded his hands neatly in his lap, trying to think about what he could do to make all of this right, to at least fix something to a level that didn't leave them like they were.

After a few minutes of careful deliberation, he found himself back on something he'd started the night before and then migrated toward something else instead. The massage. That was where he'd gone wrong. If only he'd just stayed massaging Kyo instead of trying to get sex, things were fine. 

He chewed his lip for a few moments and then opened his mouth to offer the massage, wondering how on earth to not be awkward about it. After a few false starts, he finally just tackled it headlong. "I went about things really wrong last night and I'm sorry. Let me make it up to you and actually give you a massage that's just that? I swear I'll keep my... other pieces... to myself. Just a massage, no strings."

Kyo looked up at Die, his heart clenching painfully as his lover blamed himself for the previous night's failings. He huffed and shook his head. "I should be the one apologizing. I should have just opened my mouth and explained that I was having issues instead of letting it fester."

"Let... what... fester, exactly?" Die asked carefully, not sure he wanted to have it spelled out to him that he wasn't wanted sexually anymore, but still needing desperately to know where it was that he stood overall.

Kyo fidgeted, taking another sip of tea then setting it aside. He opened his mouth a couple of times to try to explain himself then just groaned in frustration. "I can't have sex with you right now....because I can't get it up, at all. No matter what I try."

There was a moment of surprise on Die's face and then he quickly covered it, compassion and understanding flooding him all at once. He shifted closer then, his hand reaching to lightly stroke Kyo's cheek. "Oh." Well, now he felt like he needed to explain himself, to tell why he had been freaking out. "I think... there's a few things you should know about my past relationships. Just... so we don't end up here again."

Kyo leaned into Die's touch, licking his lips. "Oh..?" He'd heard some of the stories of Die's past, but not a lot, all things considered. Suddenly he felt a sense of shame creeping up on him. It was as if he'd failed to pay attention to Die's life even as it happened right under his nose.

Die sucked his lower lip into his mouth, biting at it a bit before he let it go again. He sighed, having the grace to at least look ashamed. "I... first, do you remember the girl I dated for almost three years... years ago? Like back when we formed the band?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose at the memory, not so much because of Die's ex-girlfriend, but because it made him think of the skank he'd been dating at the time. "Ahh, yeah? I think."

Die looked away, debating how much of what to tell. "So... I was with her almost three years, damn near to the day. For the first four months, it was... normal. Sexual things a reasonable amount of the time, but not overly often. The fifth month, she let me have sex basically every single time I asked. And then out of nowhere, she cut me off. I wasn't allowed to touch her or kiss her or hug her or anything further either. She'd scream at me if she found out I was even doing anything to please myself, even if not around her."

He shifted uncomfortably, his hands dropping to his sides. "It was that way for the rest of the time I was with her. She never would tell me why or what happened, she just turned me down over and over. And I wasn't even honest with her about any of my strange fetishes or anything. Just... normal sex." He sighed again and pursed his lips a little. "And, just to be completely honest... it's happened in virtually every long term relationship since then. So when you just said you couldn't... I knew it was the same thing all over again. I knew I just needed to shut myself down sexually again and be happy you weren't pushing me away romantically."

He swiped at a few stray tears as he sat back on his butt, sighing. "I feel stupid though, because that's not at all what was happening and I made it all about me when it wasn't."

Kyo stared down at Die as he talked, his eyes narrowing slightly as he thought of this bitch cutting Die off with no explanation. You couldn't do that to a man, especially forbidding himself pleasure. He huffed slightly and shifted, biting his lip. He felt horrible now, he should have just been up front about it. "Oh God, Die..." He reached out to stroke Die's tear moistened cheek, sighing softly. "I am so sorry to make you even think like that."

Die stared up at Kyo and shook his head a little. "No, I completely and reasonably see why you wouldn't want to say outright what was going on. It's okay. I mean... it's not like I ever told you what happened." He shrugged and reached to lightly run his fingertips over Kyo's arm. "I'll be up front here. I'm looking at going to a therapist because I have such bad reactions to things like this and the whole Nora knowing my secret, and all kinds of other shit. Not good." He pursed his lips slightly. "I'd be a fool not to go. But... maybe we should go together?"

Kyo considered the idea of going to therapy though it made him slightly ill to his stomach. He reached out and caught Die's hand, squeezing it lightly then sighing. "I guess... I could try?"

Die laced his fingers with Kyo's own and squeezed slightly. "Maybe it'll be easier together than alone?" He shifted a little bit and then leaned forward, pushing his face against Kyo's chest, inhaling the scent that was all his lover.

Kyo nodded slightly, murmuring, "Maybe..." He wrapped his arms around Die's shoulders, closing his eyes and tilting his head downward to press a soft kiss to the other's hair. After a few moments of holding his lover like that, he lifted his head and let out a soft laugh. "Still wanna give me that massage?"

Die pulled back when Kyo spoke up and smiled up at him. "Of course." He shifted a little and patted the floor in front of himself. "Come lay down."

Kyo gave Die a grateful look and shifted off of the couch to lay on the floor. He shifted around and got comfortable, propping his head on his arms. "I will always enjoy your touch, Die."

"That's what matters," Die murmured, shifting himself so he was over Kyo's body, straddling his upper thighs as he began to lean into the massage on his back, doing it just the way Kyo liked. "Just forgive me if my body reacts in other ways, yeah?"

Kyo groaned softly as Die started working his muscles, loving the feeling of his lover's near expert touch. He gave a soft chuckle and shook his head. "I would be surprised if it didn't..."

Die let out a little huff of a laugh. "Yeah... well... let me say I wasn't looking forward to trying to get my body to go back to how I used to react to you rather than letting myself actually feel." He shifted a little. "Deep breath and once it's out, tap the floor."

Kyo snorted. "I don't think there's any way I could just... turn it off." He shook his head then took a deep breath, filling his lungs to their capacity then slowly letting it out. Once he'd exhaled as much as possible, he gave the floor a light tap.

Die leaned into where his hands were resting over Kyo's spine then, feeling the light pops beneath his hands. He gave the other's back a wry sort of smile. "Trust me, I wasn't looking forward to it, at all."

Kyo grunted as his back popped in all the right places under Die's hands, a relaxed feeling coming over him afterward. He shifted a bit, readjusting his body then settling again before speaking. "Even if for some ungodly reason I became uninterested in sex with you, I would never want you to stop jacking off."

Die's hands paused on Kyo's back at the words and he had to smile down at his lover. "Thank you. You honestly have no idea how much that statement means to me." He ran his hand over Kyo's back and then pushed his shirt up, warm flesh beneath his palms as he worked some of the deeper muscles now.

Kyo smiled against his arms then sighed in a relaxed sort of manner as Die started hitting some of the sorer spots, working the kinks out. "Mmm, you are, however, not allowed to stop doing this. I forbid it."

Die chuckled. "Just repay me sometimes, yeah?" He paused for a second again when he realized how that sounded. "Uh... I mean by massage means."

Kyo laughed, the sound muffled against the floor. "Sure, sure... I'll repay you both ways... eventually."

"Mmm... only when you're ready. I think I can survive for a while." He shifted down a bit and pressed his fingers into a particularly tight band of muscle. "What have you been doing? Creating rocks back here?"

The shorter let out a particularly loud groan when lithe fingers dug into the tightest area of all, just below his neck. "Aah... apparently... damn."

Die grunted slightly as he worked the knot out and then sat back again, now rubbing over his entire back, admiring the tattoo beneath his fingertips.

Kyo sighed softly as he finally felt his back unknotting. He shifted and let his head rest on the floor, eyes sliding shut as he enjoyed Die's touch. "Mmm..."

Die wet his lips a little, proud of himself that he wasn't so hard it hurt, though he definitely had a little wood going on. He lightly scratched over Kyo's back to stimulate blood flow and then rubbed again, patting just after. "Good?"

Kyo shifted and nodded, giving another little groan at the scratches. "I'm good. Thank you, baby."

Die pushed himself up and straightened his clothing a little bit, looking awkward for a moment before plopping on the couch and crossing his legs. "Okay, seriously about the therapist, I at least need to go. Does your therapist take clients still?"

Kyo rolled over and sat up, shifting to lay his head on Die's thigh, humming softly. "I'm sure she does. She'd probably be glad to hear from me again, to be honest."

Die reached to run his hand over Kyo's hair. "How about we try it once together - assuming she lets us - and if it doesn't work, I'm not making you go, okay?"

Kyo nodded then finally got up, moving to sit on the couch next to Die. He leaned in and kissed Die's softly. "We'll see how it goes..."


	28. Chapter 28

It'd been almost a week since Die and Kyo had finally talked about what had happened. Die found that he was still vaguely awkward around Kyo whenever he tended to have any form of sexual desire though. It was almost like he didn't know how to deal with the situation any longer.

It didn't really help that they were super busy with everything still, concerts and the like. The days slipped by and Die became increasingly aware that the more he held himself back, the more he felt like he was doing something wrong. They still hadn't had time for therapy of any sort, though he had contacted the therapist and she'd been more than willing to do couple's therapy with them, telling them she'd give them an opening whenever they found the time, understanding their schedule was sort of fuzzy for now.

Tonight they had the evening to themselves and Die had ordered pizza in, not thrilled with doing anything more elaborate for the time being. He sat with a bottle of iced tea on the couch, his lips pursed as he stared at the TV in a glazed sort of manner, his mind completely somewhere else, his second slice of pizza completely ignored on his lap.

Kyo was becoming increasingly more stressed as the tour carried on. It was weird for him. While he was on stage and directly after, he felt rejuvenated and alive again, but once they'd showered and gotten home, he would crash and burn so hard that he slept for many hours on end. He had no idea what the issue could be, but he was getting tired of it. 

They'd ordered pizza tonight and he was still nibbling idly at his first piece, somehow realizing that Die's second was untouched. With a sigh, he reached out and muted the TV, looking at Die. "What's up?"

Die sort of jerked out of his little trance and blinked, looking over at Kyo. He shrugged a little. "My mind is just elsewhere, that's all." He gave him a small smile. "Sorry." He licked his lips a little and pushed his hand through his own hair before he finally picked up his piece of pizza and quickly ate it in five bites, washing it down with some of his tea.

Kyo huffed softly and set his half eaten piece down. He reached over and rested his hand on Die's denim clad knee. "Like where?"

Die flicked a glance down to Kyo's hand and then back up to his face, a slightly confused look on his face. After a moment, he sighed, putting his drink down. "We need to actually figure some stuff out, Kyo... I just... I think I'm lost on what I'm supposed to do, how I'm supposed to act. You know?"

Kyo winced vaguely and nodded, chewing his lip then pulling his hand back, sighing softly. "I know. It's... hideously unfair to you..."  
Die shook his head a little. "It's not that." He pushed his hand through his hair again and closed his eyes, tugging lightly at that. "I need... I need to know what you want me to do. I get that you're okay with me being... er... alone... with myself. But sometimes I just want to be near you, be intimate, even if not sexual, but I feel like I shouldn't do that and it makes me act weird around you."

Kyo sighed softly, running his hand through his hair. "I… I don't want you to be distant. I really don't. I also..." he paused and looked down, blushing slightly. "I can also do... favors... for you, too."

Die looked over at him, biting his lip slightly. "Won't it be strange?" He asked after a moment, flushing slightly as he looked away. "I mean... it seems like it'd just be... awkward. You know?" Kyo leaned his head back, closing his eyes. "I don't know... kind of, maybe? But, hell, I miss touching you... just seeing your beautiful face contorted with pleasure."

Die licked his lips a little bit and then stood up, moving to stand in front of Kyo. He hesitated for a moment and then shifted to settle down on Kyo's lap. He shivered slightly as he pressed himself against Kyo's body, slipping his arms around him and pressing his face against his shoulder.

Kyo watched Die as he stood then let out a soft sound when the other sat in his lap. He wrapped his arms around his waist, turning to press a kiss to the top of Die's head. Die sighed softly, settling against Kyo, relaxing for the first time since their argument. "I love you," he murmured softly.

Kyo tilted his head and kissed at Die's neck, still wanting to touch and enjoy his lover, even if his cock wouldn't behave. "I love you, too, Die."  
Die swallowed thickly, not quite certain what he really wanted to do. He pursed his lips a little and then pulled back enough to catch Kyo's lips with his own, just needing to feel his lover's sweet lips against his own.

Kyo happily complied with the kiss, pushing his hand into Die's hair as he did. Just because one part of his equipment wasn't working, didn't mean he couldn't indulge in making out with his lover. 

With that in mind, he shifted and grabbed Die, laying him back on the couch without breaking the contact of their lips. 

Die moaned softly when Kyo moved them, pushing him back on the couch. He'd missed this contact with Kyo and it was nice to have it now. He whimpered softly, one long leg hooking over Kyo's thigh as he bucked his hips up to meet his lover's, his tongue flicking out over the vocalist's lips, tasting him with a groan. He pulled back from the kiss for a moment to murmur out, "Oh yeah... I like this."

The vocalist shifted atop Die and indulged in licking and biting at his neck, feeling twinges of arousal sneak in here and there. He knew though, that even if he became hard, he wouldn't get off. It was probably more a mental block than anything, but it was still there. 

Pushing that thought aside, He ran his hand down Die's side, lifting his head to smile softly. "I'm glad..." Die slid his hands down Kyo's back, reaching for his ass and squeezing both supple globes as he groaned, grinding his hips up against Kyo's own. He caught his lips again, pushing his tongue into the other's mouth, his fingers still kneading the other's ass, enjoying that at least he could do this with him.

Kyo grunted as long fingers squeezed his ass, causing him to roll his hips into the touch only to be met with Die grinding against him. He sucked the offered tongue, nibbling at it with his teeth then groaning softly against his lover's lips. He hesitated then reached between them, pressing his palm against the obvious bulge in Die's pants, rubbing over him. He wanted this, wanted to make Die feel good even if he couldn't get anywhere with his own arousal.

A shock of pure bliss raced through Die's body as Kyo's hand slid over his arousal. His head tilted, back arching, as he whined. His pure desperation was obvious in that moment, the fact that he really hadn't touched himself, even though he knew he could. He bit his lower lip and shuddered. "Oh gods."

Kyo let out a soft sound, leaning in to press his lips to the corner of Die's mouth even as he cried out. "You are the single most gorgeous creature in the world when you are aroused and desperate." He didn't waste a lot of time, quickly undoing Die's pants and freeing his rigid length, stroking his hand over it. 

Heat swept through Die the moment Kyo touched his cock. He was so hard it almost hurt. Whimpering softly he let go of Kyo's ass and grabbed his biceps instead. He gasped at that as well, his head tilting to look back at his lover, eyes on the area he was touching. "Oh sweet baby jesus," he hissed out, shivering after a moment and settling down again. Kyo's arms were more muscular than the last time he'd touched them and that fact alone turned him on something awful.

A look of ill-concealed pride flitted onto Kyo's face as Die's hands gripped the result of his more strenuous workouts. He smirked and wrapped his hand around Die's cock, thumbing the head briefly before beginning to stroke it properly, knowing the other would explode at any moment, the desperation too great.

Die panted, his hips bucking up into Kyo's touch as his lover began jacking him off. Desire spiraled through him in a dizzy disarray, the world turning under the pleasure of what Kyo was doing to him. One hand left Kyo's arm and reached for his own shirt, yanking it up, knowing he wasn't long for this, the unexpected surprise of getting what he'd been craving almost too much. He moaned again, cock twitching a little in Kyo's hand, an involuntary motion.

Kyo watched as the guitarist quickly became undone, his lithe body arching against his touch. When his shirt was tugged up to reveal a smooth stomach, Kyo used his other hand to brush over the skin, scraping lightly with his nails. "So gorgeous." He tightened his fingers around the pulsating length held within them and stroked harder, intent on bringing his lover to that glorious edge.

Die let out a thin whine, his muscles contracting as he arched up from the couch, ass clenched. "Fuck!" And a second later, the most intense bliss flooded through him, his length spurting his release out over his uncovered abdomen. He let out a few more fairly intense sounds, honestly feeling like he'd just taken some exquisite drug.

A feeling of lust spread through Kyo as Die reached his peak, shooting his offering over his stomach, making quite the mess of things. He didn't care though and as soon as Die settled down, he swooped in, kissing him hard on the mouth, his hand still idly stroking his length, milking him dry.

Die gasped, reaching out to grip his arms again, stroking over them and then pushing at his shirt, wanting to see him topless as soon as possible. His hips pushed into the touches Kyo was still giving him while he kissed him back passionately. 

Kyo took the hint from Die's insistent tugging of his shirt, sitting back when their kiss finished to remove the article of clothing. He licked his lips and flexed a little, showing off his body a bit.

Lust still burned inside Die as Kyo stripped for him. He always loved this part, watching Kyo remove his clothing and seeing the gorgeous body beneath them. He reached to run his fingers over Kyo's muscles. "God, baby... you've been really pushing it lately haven't you?" He squeezed a little and then slid his hands down over his pecks and to his abdomen, which was equally as ripped for the time being. "Shit... fucking gorgeous."

Kyo shivered slightly under Die's gaze, cheeks heating just slightly. "Ah, well, yeah... stress outlet... but it has its added benefits too." He chuckled softly, tightening his stomach up, making his abs show even better. "And the best part about it... this is _all_ yours."

Die stared at Kyo for a long moment before he growled out, "I want to fucking worship you." With that, he pushed himself upright, grapping Kyo before he could pitch backwards, and wrapped one arm around his lower back. His free hand raked over Kyo's abs as his lips attached to Kyo's neck, sucking slightly, though not hard enough to leave a mark.

Kyo groaned softly at the tone in his lover's voice, shivering shortly after. He let Die up, sliding his arms around his waist, holding on as Die sucked at his neck. "Gods, baby..." It felt good, despite his issues.

Die's tongue darted out over the area a few more times before he leaned to scrape his teeth over one bicep, feeling the bulge of muscle under the other's skin. He kissed it just after and then ran his tongue over what used to be Kyo's butterfly, proving how much attention he'd paid by tracing over the outline of where it used to be.

The way Die was lavishing attention to his body felt amazing and soon the vocalist was letting out small moans of pleasure, especially as that wandering appendage traced over a long-covered tattoo. He let out a huff of breath, squirming, his cock definitely half-hard at this point.

Die's fingers squeezed at Kyo's arms before he moved to his chest and rubbed over the hardened pebbles there. He was fully hard again, completely enraptured in what he was doing and enjoying it quite a bit. With a moan, he moved to suck on one of the nipples, his teeth lightly plucking at it.

Kyo could feel how affected his lover was by touching him like this, part of him swelling with pride from it. He shivered when a mouth closed over his nipple, drawing a soft whine from his lips. "Die..."  
Die shifted to the other nipple and began flicking his tongue over it, keeping his tongue rigid while his fingers plucked at the other. A moment later, he moved further down, kissing over Kyo's abs with a groan of pleasure. Maybe it was sort of vain, but he loved Kyo's body. It was amazing to have a lover that didn't just mentally make him attracted, but physically was the most amazing piece of ass he'd ever seen.

Kyo ended up reclining back some, his heart rate increasing rapidly as Die kissed him all over. He let out a deep moan, reaching to tangle his fingers in Die's silky locks. "Gods...

Die realized where this was heading, that he wanted so desperately to worship all of him, even the parts that didn't work right then. He shivered slightly, pushing him back on the couch and starting to undo his pants, kissing and nipping at his hip bones. After a moment, he found that tantalizing vein peeking out above his boxers and began laving it with his tongue.

Kyo sighed lightly as Die's mouth descended on his more sensitive areas, causing him to squirm. "Ah, Die..." He reached out and ran his fingers through the other's hair, semi-hard length twitching the slightest bit.

Die got Kyo's pants open, his palm brushing over Kyo's length before he took hold of his boxers and began to tug them down. It felt so nice, just being able to go after Kyo how he wanted to. He just hoped it didn't make Kyo upset or something, the last thing he wanted to do was make him depressed because he didn't cum or something.

Kyo couldn't help but moan as Die touched him so intimately, his hips instinctually pushing upward into the touch. A pang of regret came over him as he realized that he was probably not going to get anywhere even with Die touching him like that but, nonetheless, it felt good. "Ahh, yes..."

Die nibbled at the other's hip lightly, tugging Kyo's pants down as he went. He couldn't resist licking lightly at the tip of Kyo's cock as he moved past, enjoying such things despite it not being fully operational right now. 

He kissed each thigh and then sat back, pulling his pants off and sitting back. "Show me your ass, baby, up in the air."

Kyo let out another sound, this one a mix of pleasure and frustration as a tongue flicked over the head of his cock. He tugged Die's hair lightly, biting his lip as he watched him. 

At his lover's request, he raised an eyebrow, shivering in the cool air. He considered it for a moment then slowly shifted onto his stomach, drawing his knees underneath himself and sticking his ass into the air for him. "Like this?"

Die grunted approvingly, moving to nip lightly at Kyo's buttock, slapping the other and then squeezing the globe of flesh. "Ah yeah... sexy baby." He spread his cheeks apart and licked his lips. Normally he wasn't big on this, but he almost wanted to give this to Kyo. After a moment's hesitation, he reached for his tea and a napkin from beside the pizza, wetting it. He put the bottle back down and slid the now wet napkin between his cheeks, cleaning him up real well, tossing the used tissue in the trash.

With a little groan, he jiggled Kyo's ass around a bit and then spread his cheeks, sliding his tongue across the puckered opening, flicking it back and forth a few times before chuckling. "This is gonna sound ridiculous... but even your asshole is perfect."

Kyo flushed and buried his head in his arms, giving a muffled groan to what Die was doing and saying. He was not expecting cold tea on his rear and gasped at the sensation, his eyes darkening with lust as he thought of what it was Die could possibly be cleaning him like that for. "Oh God..." 

He couldn't help but cry out as Die's tongue stroked over his most intimate area, a shudder rippling through him and then going straight to his dick, which was very slowly getting hard, despite Die's comments on his "perfect" ass. "Die... fuck..."

Die made a soft sound and then rubbed the flat of his tongue over Kyo's entrance, rubbing back and forth. After a moment, he stabbed his tongue in just a little bit, only as far as he'd actually cleaned, and then pulled back out, fucking him with it a little bit. He grunted as he reached down to touch himself, jerking off as he worshiped this particular part of Kyo's body to the best of his ability.

Kyo squirmed and wriggled as Die's tongue worked him over, pressing into his body slightly. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore. Even if he didn't get off, he _needed_ Die's touch. "D-die… ah… please... touch me..."

Instantly Die let go of his own dick and reached under Kyo. He grasped his lover's cock and moaned as he felt how hard it was. He began stroking him in time with how his tongue flickered over his tight hole, stabbing in after a moment with a grunt.

The vocalist let out a keening whine as Die's hand wrapped around his cock, providing almost instant relief. He bucked his hips into the touch, clawing at the couch slightly. It felt damn good and all he could do at the moment was be happy of that fact.

Die pulled back from fucking Kyo with his tongue, moving to nip at his ass again, leaving a light red mark on his behind. He shifted around, finally pressing his cock against Kyo's slightly slick behind, rubbing it against his crack.

Kyo moaned and looked back at Die, leveling him with a serious look. "Fuck me. Please. Die, I, I need you so bad." His voice held a note of desperation and almost impatience as he pressed back against his lover.

Die didn't even remotely hesitate to comply. He shoved his hand between the cushions and dug out the lube, quickly applying some to his cock and then some to Kyo's behind. He pushed himself against his lover's entrance, almost trembling with his arousal. He whined softly and then shoved in, grunting as he sheathed himself completely within his lover. His hand slid around to grasp Kyo's length again, quickly starting to jack him off again.

Die slid into his body and it felt like heaven. The pain and slight burn of the stretch then the pleasure of being filled hit him and he let out a cry of Die's name. He pushed his hips back, fucking himself on Die's dick for a few moments then stilling, panting heavily. "Die, oh God... fuck..."

Die let Kyo move, enjoying the visual stimulation of the other fucking himself on his dick. He licked his lips a little and when Kyo stilled, he began to move, shoving into him, going fast because he just couldn't hold it back. 

With a moan of Kyo's name, he thrust in and out of the other's body quickly, tossing his head back as he fucked him. "Oh god, baby... need you... oh fuck." 

Kyo didn't bother trying to hold back the sounds issuing from his lips, his back bowed up as Die thrust into him. 

Suddenly, without much warning, he felt an intense wave of pure bliss slam into him, making him scream out Die's as he hunched up and convulsed beneath him. He let out a sob of pleasure mixed with relief as he felt cum spurt from his cock, though it was very little. "Die... I... oh Gods!"

Die gasped, not having expected any reaction like this from Kyo at all. He grabbed Kyo's shoulder and began fucking him almost violently, almost blind with pleasure. It wasn't long before he felt his orgasm slamming down on him, his cum pumping into his lover's passageway.

Kyo shuddered all over, whimpering as Die fucked his seemingly hypersensitive body. He let out a soft moan when the other came, rolling his hips back and clenching around him to help. "O-oh..."

Die stopped after a moment and then thrust in hard. He sniffed slightly and pulled his cock out, hunching down to lick at the cum spilling from his lover's ass. After licking him real well, he moaned and kissed his taint. His fingers gathered up the little amount of cum Kyo had spurted out and he licked that off his fingers as well. Kissing each cheek, he settled down and pulled Kyo into his lap. "Baby... I think... did you...?"

Kyo had just relaxed against the couch when he felt Die's tongue lapping the cum from his body, causing another little spasm to go through him. He let out a breathy sigh and slumped forward, his ass still in the air. "I… sorta?" It had be admittedly the weirdest orgasm he'd ever had.

Die tugged a little more, getting his lover on his lap and then let out a soft sound. "Mmm... did it feel good at least?"

Kyo shifted and nuzzled into Die's neck, nodding. "It really did..." He turned and threaded his fingers through Die's hair, pulling him close and kissing him deeply, tasting their combined cum there.

Die groaned as the other pulled him in to kiss him. He let out a soft whimper and flicked his tongue over Kyo's own. When he pulled back, he smirked a little at him. "Mmm... thank you for this. I just... god I needed to be close to you like this."

Kyo reached out to stroke Die's cheek. "No, thank you… because I got something… some kind of release... and it was amazing."

Die curled his arms around his lover and kissed over his cheek and neck. "I'm glad. And honestly, Kyo... even if you hadn't, it was still amazing." He kissed him again and squeezed a bit.

Kyo smiled softly and tucked his head under Die's chin, closing his eyes. "It was very odd, like I came every way except out of my dick." He gave his head a little shake and shrugged.

Die chuckled. "You did cum a little bit, though it was sort of watery." He ran his hand over Kyo's abs, feeling the muscles beneath. "You get me riled up no matter my best intentions not to be."

Kyo wrinkled his nose at the thought of watery cum then chuckled softly, his stomach muscles rippling slightly at Die's touch. "Mm, am I supposed to be sorry?"

"Nope. Just thought you could use the ego boost." His fingers curled slightly and he tickled his stomach a little bit with a smirk.

Kyo grinned then let out an unmanly squeak as his stomach was molested. "Oi! No... don't start that again..." He'd been through enough tickling to last him a while.

Die smirked softly and stopped, just relaxing back on the couch, holding Kyo against him. "I think things will be just fine." With a little therapy that they both probably could use anyway, he figured they'd be back on the right track sometime soon enough anyway. He closed his eyes, dozing a little since it wasn't quite time for bed, but post-orgasmic bliss tended to make him feel slightly sleepy anyway.

Kyo hummed softly and shifted, getting more comfortable and closing his eyes as well. Hopefully, in the end, it would all work out for the better and they could move on from this road block. As he dozed, he murmured, "Love you..."


	29. Chapter 29

It had been about two weeks since Kyo had first figured out he was having some kind of weird block when it came to getting off. He had managed a couple of orgasms since then but they weren't full out and each one had left him feeling completely drained, not at all the euphoric sense he usually had. 

He and Die had agreed that they both needed therapy of some kind. Today was his first appointment and he was in the gray and white waiting room, squirming in his seat. The place was dreary and there were two people on the opposite side of the waiting room staring at him, which made him very uncomfortable. It wouldn't do for the media to find out he was going to therapy and he'd taken as many precautions as he could to prevent them from finding out, including wearing gloves, a ball cap and sunglasses. 

After another few minutes, he sighed and changed positions again, glancing towards the door labeled _Private_ with some hope that it'd open and it would be his turn.

Die had come with Kyo to the therapy session, the pair of them setting it up as a couples therapy rather than individual. He was equally as freaked out as Kyo, though admittedly not quite as stuffed into things. He had his hair pulled back and a beanie on his head, making him look less like his usual self, but other than that, he was still just normal Die. 

He wanted to put his hand on Kyo's thigh and tell him it'd be okay, but he didn't want to do it in public where these people were looking at them oddly. Probably the fact that they were all kinds of overdressed to be inside.

The door slid open and the prior client stepped out. Die recognized them from one of the up and coming bands, but he didn't make eye contact or even acknowledge them in any way. They did the same and he put it out of his mind that he'd even seen them there, knowing this was how it should be.

The therapist stepped out and looked over at them. "Gentlemen?" She bobbed her head to try to get them to come inside without using their names.

Kyo was quick to look up as the door finally opened and someone stepped out, he felt vaguely like he should know the person but didn't spend much time worrying about it. This was, after all, supposed to be completely anonymous and safe for anyone who came here and a lot of celebrities had probably been through those doors. 

His gaze shifted to the therapist and he nodded slightly, glancing towards Die before standing and moving towards her office. She was what could be describe as severe looking, mid-50's and dressed well in an obviously tailored suit, her hair with a single gray streak in it done up in a simple but elegant style. For some reason, all of this made Kyo uncomfortable, especially given the subject matter they would be discussing. 

She waved them inside and he bowed slightly before moving to hover near a leather chair sat in front of her desk, a nervous look on his face as he waited for Die.   
Die got up when Kyo did, following him into the office, watching as the woman closed the door. He bit his lip a little and then released it with a nervous huff. Now was not the time for nerves, he needed to be Kyo's rock and his own right then. He glanced at the single chair and started to say something, but the therapist beat him to it. 

"Daisuke, will you help me move this small couch over and we can get rid of this chair?" She was standing next to a small love seat, her hand on the arm.

He moved to help, quickly getting the other end of the couch and lifting it up with her so it wasn't dragging across the floor of the office. It wasn't heavy and he found himself thankful for that. Glancing at Kyo, he gave him a little flick of his eyes between him and the leather chair, hoping he'd push it out of the way.

Kyo opened his mouth to say something then shut it, giving an awkward little motion before huffing and grabbing the leather chair, moving it out of the way then just standing there. He felt suddenly emasculated as Die and the therapist moved the couch, feeling like he should have helped. 

Instead, he just waited until they had it in place then sat on the edge of it, removing his hat and gloves then crossing his arms over his stomach, which was in knots. 

Die settled down on the couch beside Kyo and reached to pat his leg, giving it a reassuring squeeze to try to get his lover to be less upset.

The therapist settled down behind her desk and put on some reading glasses, smirking a little at the pair of them. "Kyo, it's a pleasure to see you again." She purposely addressed him as Kyo given that he'd expressed he preferred to be called that when he used to come to her sessions. "And Diasuke... or do you prefer Die?"

Die glanced up and gave a little smile. "Either way is fine with me." He removed his hand from Kyo's thigh and settled for leaning forward a bit, hands dangling between his knees. 

"The couch was a test and you both passed it, though I do see that you are having some problems with the outcome, Kyo?" She looked between them and Die gave her a strange look, slightly unsure what was going on. After a moment, she elaborated, not giving Kyo a chance to answer just yet. "You communicated without speaking, it's the first sign of a sturdy relationship. Good things for us and these sessions. Now... Die... can you guess what Kyo's problem was?"

Die looked a bit shocked, like he hadn't expected it to come to him having to play guessing games. "Er... because he couldn't help?"

Kyo gave a soft sigh and finally removed his sunglasses, nodding his head to therapist in answer to her greeting. He peered over at Die and relaxed just the tiniest bit when his lover squeezed his leg though it didn't last long as the therapist called him out on his reaction. She was good at that and had pulled many things out of him with her way of things over their past sessions. 

Clearing his throat, he turned to look at Die then the floor, nodding a little.  
"That's good. You can pick up on Kyo's reasoning for things, even if it's not something you could see on his face." She shifted a little in her chair, opening Kyo's file folder and tapping the back of her pin on it for a moment. "So, I know you're here for couples therapy, though I would like the issues in your own words, one at a time, and don't leave things out. I want emotions. Kyo, you first please."

Kyo gritted his teeth a little, always hating this part about therapy, the actual opening up and speaking his issues aloud. With a sigh, he shifted and glanced at her then gestured with his hand. "I've been... stressed. Stressed and afraid with my voice, stressed that I couldn't handle the new tour and now..." He ducked his head, cheeks burning as he muttered out, "...stressed in the bedroom... and ashamed because of it."

Her voice became less clinical and more soothing, geared toward getting someone to open up to her. "Stressed how?"

Die shifted a bit in his seat, uncomfortable with the whole thing for Kyo's sake.

Kyo glanced towards Die and suddenly wished he wasn't there, but also didn't want him to leave either. Letting out a huff, he squirmed in his seat a bit before speaking. "I, er, I can't seem to... you know..." he flailed his hand a bit, hoping like mad that the therapist understood without him having to be graphic. "And it's not... Die... it's completely me..."

Die scooted forward on his seat again and shifted uncomfortably. Kyo's discomfort was making him edgy as well. All it took was the therapist looking at him and he opened his mouth, spilling out everything. "I feel like I have problems, like I'm overly sexual and it's not even related to any of this at all. It started long before this. I had so much porn, I jerk off like four times a day, and then I have sex on top of that. Everyone keeps saying it's just what men do, but I feel like something's wrong with me and I want to stop feeling like that. I don't even care if I keep doing the same things in the same amount, I just want to feel okay with me." 

He swallowed a little and then quietly continued. "I've been having panic attacks ever since Kyo's throat problems were diagnosed and they still haven't stopped." He glanced at Kyo and gave him an apologetic look. "I've tried to hide it from everyone, but I can't keep going on like this. It's ridiculous."

The therapist quietly nodded and then wrote down a few notes in Kyo's file, pulling out a fresh one for Die and quickly filling out some information. "Okay, Kyo were there any other problems you'd like to address as well?"  
Kyo looked at Die as he spoke, frowning a little. He felt like they were both feeding off of each other's discomfort and it was making this whole thing worse. The mention of Die having panic attacks gave him a sense of guilt, as if they were his fault. The fact that they hadn't stopped made him frown and he looked down at the floor again, kicking his feet a little. 

When the therapist addressed him again, he glanced up then gave Die a sidelong glance before sighing and pulling up his shirt, revealing the scar from his self-inflicted wound. Though it was long healed now, he knew she needed to know about it as she had all of his other wounds. "I... also feel inadequate... when it comes to our relationship. I feel as though Die puts in so much more than I can manage."

Die immediately looked alarmed at what Kyo was saying, the look on his face clearly saying he was taken aback by the comment and didn't think it true at all. After a moment of fish-mouthing, he closed it and stayed quiet.

She looked between the pair of them and then quietly offered, "Die, the idea is to get a three way conversation going. Please say whatever is on your mind."

Die sighed and then reached for Kyo's hand, drawing it into his lap and hanging on with both of his own. "Kyo, I've never ever thought such a thing about you. You're the love of my life and I don't think you're inadequate in any way. And I seriously mean that. Even with the sexual issues, I don't feel that way at all." He reached to touch Kyo's cheek and then went back to holding his hand with both of his own once again. "I just... I feel like sometimes we both fear so much and we never reveal it until it gets to... well..." his eyes fell on the scar Kyo had just revealed, "that point."

Kyo bit his lip hard enough to almost make it bleed. He swallowed a bit, curling his hand in Die's and ducking his head a little, listening to his lover speak. The other was right, of course, they were both afraid, even though they were so far into their relationship. "I… yeah... you're right." He glanced from Die to the therapist then focused on Die's hands holding his.

She wrote a few more things down on the paper in front of her and then looked back up at them. "Okay, so I think it's very clear that the pair of you work well together. The only thing from here is that we work on how you go about telling one another things and then we attack the problems at their roots, which I think actually seem fairly straightforward." She took her glasses off and put them on the table. "Would either of you like tea? Kyo, I recall you like green teas and I have an imported one you might like to try from London."

Die quietly asked for any red tea she had and then squeezed Kyo's hand hard in his own, anxiety clearly written all over his form.

Kyo nodded slightly, licking his lips. "Tea would be nice, thank you." He shifted and pressed his leg against Die's, squeezing his hand tightly. They would be okay, he knew... now if his "bedroom issue" would just resolve itself. Of course, that was what this was for, in part.

She got up and went to make them tea, coming back with a cup for each, Die's red and Kyo's green. She sat down and then looked Kyo over quietly. "You've been working out since I last saw you." She smiled, offering the compliment as only that, nothing more, the tone in her voice showing it quite clearly. She was always big on positive reinforcement.

Die flushed a little, remembering the night he'd noticed the same. He sipped at his tea a little bit and licked his lips.

"So, I think the pair of you need to start out really simple. Just promise each other to be a bit more open when there are large problems. At times, granted, things don't need to be shared, but most of it does need to be. There's a line between those and you'll find it a little better with it. As of right now, the pair of you will be getting things out in our sessions, but a happy medium will likely fall into place at home as long as you don't stove up."

Kyo blushed a little at the compliment, murmuring a soft "thank you" in response to both it and the tea. He took a sip, an appreciative look on his face at the taste. He nodded to her words, reaching over to rub Die's leg slightly. "I think I can at least manage to try..."

Die nodded. "I think it'll work out as long as we can get it started in here." He pushed his hand through his hair and nervously picked up his teacup and took another drink of it and then patted Kyo's leg nervously again.

"Daisuke."

The use of his full name made him stop and look up. He pursed his lips a little and then asked, "Yes?"

"Let's talk with you first. I'd like you to describe an entire day for you sexually. The ups and downs of it, what makes you uncomfortable and what doesn't. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks, but only what you do."

Die made a face, his stomach rolling a bit. He sighed softly and pushed his cup back onto the desk, hunching over once more. "I wake up in the morning and I'm always at least half aroused. That part doesn't bother me at all, it's normal." He glanced toward Kyo and then away again, staring at the floor as he tried to find the will to continue. 

Kyo shifted and even brought his hand up to lightly stroke Die's back, knowing this had to be uncomfortable. It wasn't like it was easy telling the therapist about your sexual issues, especially in front of your partner.

Die felt some amount of comfort at the way Kyo stroked at his back and closed his eyes, just pressing on to get it all out in the open. "If I get off in the morning while I'm still hard, then it's easier the rest of the day, I don't get random... issues. But if I don't - which most mornings, I don't just because of time or whatever - then I end up wanting more and more throughout the day."

He glanced up and saw she was writing very short notes, just keys he assumed. "So let's say I don't... then I get aroused sometime before lunch and by the time it's been happening either a couple times or just constantly for too long, I go to the bathroom to... relieve myself." He squirmed a little, not liking saying this at all. Getting up, he began to pace the length of the couch. "After that, if we're at work, if I get stuck on what I'm working on, sometimes I'll go get off again because it helps me mellow out enough to think straight... or maybe it's just enough of a distraction to give me a better view on it." He paused and reached up to scratch his head a little. "Before the issues," he glanced at Kyo and his cheeks reddened a bit, "I'd go home and usually do something with Kyo. But sometimes I'd just get off myself if the moment just wasn't right."

Kyo watched Die stand up and pace, frowning a little as he listened to what was coming out of his lover's mouth. He'd known that Die would get off at work sometimes, but honestly, he'd had no clue that it was that much or anything. He sat there and chewed his bottom lip, wondering if it was all because he couldn't give Die enough.

She looked up from scribbling her notes and put the pen down, sitting back in her chair, eyes following Die's continued pacing. "That doesn't sound all that unusual to me, honestly. Some men just have higher libidos than others. And I'm willing to bet that Kyo here has had some similar times that you probably don't know about, and I think that he probably didn't know you did that most of those times either. International studies say it's typical for men to get off about two to three times a day. That's an average. Some will be lower and some will be higher."

Die paused in his pacing and frowned a little at her. "But that consistently?"

"Tell me something. Do you have your underwear sorted by color? Your socks in actual pairs in your drawers? Your medicine cabinet sorted by the use of each thing in it?"

The guitarist paused, looking vaguely stunned, and then nodded. "Yeah, I do."

"And do you go to the bathroom at pretty much the same times each day? Do all your morning and nightly activities in exactly the same order, for the same length of time? Do you feel slightly pissed off when someone doesn't give you prior notice about some event that you have to work into your schedule?"

Die looked a little uncomfortable, his shoulders slumping slightly. "Yeah... I do."

"Then it's simple, Die. You're a creature of habit. You realized that your body liked a certain schedule and you keep one variation or the other. It's not a big deal. But if you're truly uncomfortable with how many times you do it, then I'd suggest maybe making sure the one in the morning happens, then it cuts down on the before lunch version. That said, I think you'd do well from a bit of variety, it might cut it down even more if you changed it up a bit. Whatever methods you use now, change them rather than using the same ones over and over, spend longer on a session and work more on it being satisfying than just a means to an end." She gestured at the seat a little. "Come back and sit down, and tell me what you think you would like best."

Die moved back to the seat and sat closer to Kyo than before, taking his hand again. "I think I'll try working on one of my alone sessions being more satisfying... it might help." He shrugged. "I can go from there if it doesn't, right?"

"That is correct, Daisuke. Now, I want to make it perfectly clear to you that I find nothing wrong with your sex drive, though my opinion is of little interest. You may want to see how Kyo feels about it, now that he knows all of it."

Kyo licked his lips as he listened, shifting a bit and rubbing his hands over his knees. When Die sat back down, he squeezed his hand and looked him for a few moments before speaking. "I am ashamed to admit I had no idea that you were doing it that often." He paused and held up a hand. "Don't think I'm mad or find it wrong. I just feel clueless. I guess I've been absorbed in my own head too often lately to notice." He hesitated and then sighed before asking the question rolling in his head. "Is... there something I can do to help?"

Die glanced at Kyo and then let out a little laugh. "It's not a new development, Kyo. Honestly, it's been going on for years." He shrugged slightly and pursed his lips for a long moment. "Just... be okay with it when I do things to myself. It doesn't mean I don't want you, it just means I'm not going to bother you with it multiple times in one day. Does that work?"

Kyo nodded, blushing a good bit. He was perfectly fine with Die getting off by himself because he, too, enjoyed the solitude of it sometimes. "I am fine with it, completely."

"Good. So... for now, that's your job on this. Now... Kyo, let's deal with your issue. Is it an erectile problem or something else?"

Kyo sighed softly and shrugged. "I'm fairly certain it isn't... that, because I have managed to get aroused and even have some sort of orgasm, but not full out. I've tried with Die and by myself..." he trailed off.

She nodded a little bit. "By some sort, what do you mean exactly?"

Kyo flushed and fiddled with the hem of his shirt. "I, er, well... I guess it was like… prostate stimulation? It happened when we were having sex."

Again, she nodded. "So a dry orgasm? Where you have the sensation, but no semen?"

Kyo nodded a little. "Yes, it was after a rather, er, passionate moment."

Die looked up and then quietly offered his own two cents worth. "I personally have a suspicion that it's the stress blocking such positive emotions. I know when I'm having a panic attack that there are no good feelings left, it's all the bad ones, all at once." He shrugged. "I could be wrong."

"Actually, Daisuke, I think you're probably right. It's hard to tell without an actual medical physician doing some examination as well, but I think we'll do fine with this avenue first and if it's not helping, then a physician. I'm of the thought that if we quell the stress, the rest will come back." She cracked a little smile and then picked up her pen again, scribbling some notes. "Do you meditate still, Kyo?"

Kyo shifted in his seat, drawing one leg up underneath him. They were both most likely correct in that it was stress and his negative emotions blocking everything else. 

At the question about his meditation, he gave a frown. "Not nearly as much as I should..."

"You've always tended to be more on the end of someone who needs to get that stress out at regular intervals, Kyo. I'd like for you to take up your daily meditations again. At least fifteen minutes out of each day." She looked over at Die. "If you'd be willing, the pair of you can meditate together. If you'd like, I can show you how to do couples meditation if you're not already familiar."

Die nodded and gave Kyo a hopeful look. The prospect of doing something so meaningful with his lover really made him feel pleased. He smiled a little and murmured, "Can we try?"

Kyo considered the idea for a moment then nodded. "Yes, I think that would be... a really good way to bring us closer..." He leaned in towards Die a little. "How exactly does one do couples meditation?"

She nodded and stood up, going to a stereo that was in the wall, pressing some buttons until a soft stream-type sound came on along with some birds chirping. She dimmed the lights and lit a few candles on her desk and a stick of incense.

Coming back around the table, she gestured at them to go over toward a little rug on the other side of the room, closer to the speakers. "Have a seat on the rug across from one another, get comfortable.

Die moved across the room and settled down on the rug cross-legged. He glanced at Kyo and gave him a hopeful smile. Kyo was already familiar with the music and even the scent of the incense, his mind going into "relax" mode. He stood and made his way to the rug, opposite Die in the same position.

She came and settled down beside the pair of them. "Now take one another's hands, try to focus on feeling each other in more than a physical sort of way. Relax into it and do whatever you feel you need to do in your meditation practices. I'm here if you need me beyond that."

Die closed his eyes and reached for Kyo's hands, focusing on his breathing for the time being. He curled his long fingers around Kyo's, thumbs lightly rubbing over Kyo's hands. 

Kyo took a few moments to mentally prep himself, always taking meditation seriously. He grounded himself and found his center before reaching out. As Die's fingers curled around his own, a soft smile touched his lips briefly. He settled again and took slow, deep breaths, attempting to put himself in that relaxed state that comes with meditation.

For Die, the process of sinking into meditation was always fairly easy. He slid into it quickly, a soft blissed-out look on his face. He shivered a little and mentally tried to imagine he had a bubble that he was trying to extend from around himself to around Kyo as well. Mentally, he pushed at it, feeling a little less suffocated every moment that he imagined it getting larger.

Kyo was doing his own brand of visualization. He was focused on mentally seeing their auras mix and blend with one another, making them one connected entity. The more he pushed at that image, the tighter he held on to Die's hand until he was, at last, relaxed again and settled, his mind calm and a peaceful feeling washing over him.

Once Die was satisfied that he had the bubble around Kyo's body, keeping him inside his space while keeping the doctor out, he smiled. He shivered a little bit and slid closer, pressing Kyo's palms together, his hands on the outside of them, holding them there with his own. He let out a soft pleased sound and then focused on his emotions, trying to share them with Kyo. First, he gave him his immense love, all of that, that had been growing in him for years and years.

Kyo swallowed as he felt Die move closer, their hands pressing together in an almost prayer like position. Goosebumps slid down his spine as a warmth spread over him. It was as if he and Die were truly connected mentally and emotionally and he could feel this great sense of love washing over him. Unbidden tears welled up behind his closed lids, tracking down his cheeks. He didn't move to wipe them away or even acknowledge their presence because honestly, he hardly noticed them at that moment.

When Die was satisfied he had presented that emotion to Kyo for long enough, he decided that he would switch emotions. He eased off on pushing all of his love at Kyo and let out a soft breath. On the next intake, he started to push out his inner turmoil, the fear and pain and stress, but he didn't push that nearly as hard as before, not wanting to get Kyo too hard with it, just wanting to let him know the volume of it.

The emotional ride turned unhappy for Kyo and he was frowning within a few moments, squirming more, pain echoing faintly in his chest. Another, uglier, emotion crept in and the words "It's your fault," bounced around his head. He fought to keep it at bay, letting this be Die's emotional confessional as it were.

Slowly, Die eased off the emotions, filtering in another set instead, these he had less control over the force of the emotions. All of his sexual feelings extended from him, his cheeks flushing a little, and his breathing going up in amount. He shivered a little and clutched at Kyo's hands a bit more than he had been.

Kyo took a deep breath the moment he felt the downturn level out. He swallowed a few times, his throat tight from the influx of emotions that he felt like he had only ever seen the surface of. 

He didn't have long to ponder that as warmth of another kind spread through him like wildfire, pooling within his lower abdomen. His breathing hitched then came out in a pant, followed by a soft moan. He couldn't help but shift closer to Die, leaning more into his space. He let go and pushed back with his own feelings of desire towards Die, wrapping the other in them like a red ribbon.

Die's fingers gripped Kyo's harder as he felt his arousal spike even more, almost certain that this wasn't just him anymore. His initial thought was that if he could just hold onto a moment like this during sex, it'd be the most amazing sex of all time. Some part of him managed to hold on to the fact that they weren't at home and make him not actually reach for Kyo any moreso than he already was. He gasped softly and tilted his head back, breathing out a soft moan, his dick hardening his pants.

Kyo rode the wave of pleasure coursing through him, his hips bucking upward faintly as his pants tightened to an almost unbearable point. With a whimper, he released Die's hands only to grab and hold tight to his shoulders, a quiet pant of the other's name escaping his lips. It was damn near like tantric sex and suddenly he desperately wished the therapist was not witnessing this.

Die shuddered a little and then let out a soft whine as Kyo's hands landed on his shoulders. Some part of him didn't want to give this up, wanted to do what he desired to do, be damned of who was in the room with them. But another part of him didn't want to humiliate Kyo in front of the therapist. His emotions slipped through on that as well, his hesitation and the reasons for it, the anxiety of wanting what he did but not knowing what to do with it. Without thinking any further on it, he gathered Kyo into his arms and pushed his face into the other's neck, arms tight around him.

Kyo felt the anxiety bleeding through the pleasure and it matched his own deep within. Shuddering, he clung to Die when the other pulled him into his arms, a soft sound escaping him. He squeezed his eyes shut and sought out calming thoughts, partly for Die's benefit but largely in hopes of calming his body down. Somewhere, he saw the irony in the fact that he'd been seeking help for such an issue and now he was pushing it away. The whole situation caused him to let out a breathless chuckle as he buried his head against Die's chest.

Die sat there trembling faintly, clutching at Kyo in a desperate sort of manner. After a few moments of having the other's slightly more calming emotions ebbing away at his arousal, he finally calmed down enough to reign himself in. He pursed his lips a little and tried to somehow show Kyo he was ready to accept Kyo's emotions back to him.

Kyo basked in the calm before the storm he was about to unleash on Die. His emotions were always very tumultuous, but he knew Die knew that. What he was afraid of were the more shallow, petty, things roaming around in his mind. Ridiculous things that had no business being there, but hung around despite his protests. 

With a quiet sigh, he shifted his hands to find Die's again, pulling them to hold them over his heart. He bit the bullet and opened the door to his own personal hell, swarming with self-loathing, insecurities, and fear as well as the petty jealousies seated in his mind over a variety of things. This was the hardest part for him, to let Die see, truly see, what it was that swam around inside him.

Die slowly took in a deep breath and held it, releasing it slowly in the calm before what he knew would be a tsunami level storm. When he felt the emotions that were not his own start to flood his mind, he did his best to experience them, to know the truth of the pain and not just the concept of it. It amazed him that it was this obvious and this easy between them. He'd heard about such things working, but not to this level and it was something very special.

It took him a few more moments and then he was enveloped by emotions he knew to be Kyo's own. Carefully, he tried to pick through them, doing what he did with his own turmoil: examine it, turn it over and pick up the next piece, try to figure out the puzzle to all of it, where it was coming from, what its point was. But Kyo's were so powerful and so vast that it literally felt like drowning rather than his own that felt more like a thick fog surrounding him. Between the two, he could feel the panic rising and he immediately focused on that, tamping down on it as fast and as hard as possible.

Once he was sure he wasn't going to panic, he eased up and let himself start to feel again. The first thing was jealousy, a sharp stab of it that he couldn't even begin to understand why it was there. His brow furrowed in concentration, his mind running over the reasons for it, trying to find one that made sense. When he couldn't, he moved on, finding a fear that stabbed through him incredibly hard, making his heart race and his skin prickle. Fear... that... was at least something that made sense.

He turned that one over and found the next, gasping as a familiar emotion swept over him, though in far more vast quantities than his own usually was. He pin-pointed it as self-loathing, the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach confirming it. At a loss as to what else to do and wanting to help Kyo, he simply pushed his affection back at him, trying to counter the negative with the overwhelming positive.

Kyo knew that once he'd let the dam break, it would be hard to retain control on the outpouring of emotions and even now, while he felt Die's panic and then his affection pushing back against it, he was having trouble gaining any semblance of control. 

Using his usual technique and completely shutting off for a moment, he took a deep breath then gently opened the door back up, his hands moving to pull Die tighter. His body was shaking from it all and his breathing was faster than before. Finally though, he managed to find and release what he felt for Die. Love, passion, overwhelming trust poured out of him like a light in the darkness. He spoke without words, telling Die that he was soul-bound to him, that he loved him unconditionally.

The moment the other let out these new emotions, Die let out a sob, clinging to Kyo for all he was worth, his own emotions overflowing as well. Everything was intensely positive for a few moments before Die just couldn't take it any longer, needing his bubble back before he became weak.

He pulled back and settled down, trying to draw his bubble back around himself, hoping Kyo would understand that he just needed to have only his own emotions in him for a little while. 

Kyo held on to Die as the other pulled him close, a choked sort of sound escaping his lips. He shivered all over then blinked slightly, feeling confused as he felt Die retreating. 

The answer came to him though as Die seemed to separate them, an odd sort of relief flooding him as it became just himself in his head space. He took several deep breaths, keeping his eyes closed as he focused on aligning himself.

Die gently stroked over Kyo's back, trying to soothe him at the sound that the other made. He made a tiny sound of his own and then settled back, holding onto Kyo's hand gently as he centered himself and then opened his eyes once he felt alone in his own headspace. He glanced over to find the therapist observing them quietly, but no readable emotion on her face. He looked back at Kyo and waited on him to be ready to move.

Kyo took his time, not liking to feel emotionally vulnerable in the "outside" world. He took a final deep breath then opened his eyes slowly, peering at Die.

The moment Kyo's eyes opened, Die reached over and pulled Kyo close, kissing him harshly for a moment before pulling back and glancing over at the therapist again.

She smiled at the pair of them. "That was quite intense. I've never seen a couple be able to reach into one another in such a manner."

Kyo brushed his hand through Die’s hair, a slight smile curving the corner of his mouth upward. He let out a puff of air, shifting back a little and looking at therapist. 

She stood up smoothly and gestured them both up. "Sadly, I have another client waiting on me now. But I'd like for the pair of you to work on this together until the next session, just don't exhaust one another with it, okay?"

Die nodded and pulled out his checkbook from his wallet, quickly writing her a check, and handing it over before he stood up. "Thank you, I've found this very useful."

Kyo bit his bottom lip, almost not ready to leave the relative safety. He took a breath then nodded, bowing slightly. "Thank you." He hoped that he and Die would find some sort of peace with her advice. 

She nodded to them and then slipped off behind her desk, quickly jotting down some notes on her paper and getting ready for the next client. "Have a wonderful evening, gentlemen."

"You as well," Die murmured, opening the door and letting Kyo out, stuffing his beanie back on and then making a beeline for the door, wanting to get back home as soon as possible. Kyo hurriedly slipped his gloves, glasses and hat back on, nodding his head at the therapist once more then stepping out, full of anxious energy, eager to be in the privacy of their home.

Die made it back to their car in record time, turning it on and buckling in. Once Kyo was in as well, he pulled out, going much faster than he usually did in a bid for what felt like freedom. "So... how do you feel about this?"

As soon as Kyo was in the car he let out a breath and looked at Die, squirming around in his seat, full of nervous energy. "It... was kind of amazing... kind of scary..."

"It was, I completely agree on both accounts." He cleared his throat and then blushed something awful. "Just sayin’, I almost jizzed myself at one point there."

Kyo fidgeted some more in his seat, his mind having gone that direction as well. He looked at Die again and huffed out a laugh. "I know the feeling... I was so hard for a minute that it freaking hurt..."

Die glanced at him. "I really hate to put this as a precedence over the other parts, but... that's the most pressing _need_ I have inside me right now. So... should we sort of... do that part again to a certain extent when we get home?"

Kyo chewed his bottom lip. "Yes... Gods yes... your need was so strong..." He reached out and ran his fingers along Die's knee. "It was really kind of incredibly erotic..."

Die couldn't believe that he was acting so much like a blushing teenager right then, but somehow, Kyo knowing just how much he wanted him was something so personal that it had him feeling almost panicky about it. He licked his lips a little and then pursed his lips, finally offering a breathy chuckle. "It's always that much."

Kyo blinked a little then smiled slightly, shifted in his seat again. "Always?" It had been a lot, but Kyo thought he could handle it, especially with Die. "Wow..."

Die winced a little and paid careful attention to the road instead. "Yeah... it is." He cleared his throat. "I can't seem to help it with you." He let out a laugh. "Want to know something funny?"

Kyo laughed softly, reaching over to pat Die's knee. "Sure..." He was squirming again, anxious to be home.

"I never felt it this bad with other lovers, not once." He flushed a little. "But every time I'd be alone and think about you, it’s always been like this." At last, he pulled into the parking garage of their complex and into their spot, cutting the engine.

Kyo licked his lips, shifting again, squeezing Die's knee. "I... I kind of feel the same..."

He unbuckled when Die cut the engine, sliding out of the car and bouncing on his tip toes.

Die grunted softly, getting out of the car and heading for the elevator bank, locking the car with the remote. He pressed for the elevator, glad when it came down quickly, only a floor up from where they were at right then. He slipped inside and pushed the button for their floor, eager to get to the safety of their house so he could be all over his lover.

Kyo was growing decidedly impatient as they waited for the elevator. He let out a few agitated huffs then looked at Die. To have been having so many issues with sex before now, his libido seemed to be home. "Die..." He was going to speak but was cut off by the arrival of the elevator and he stepped on, trying to avoid his eyes .

"Die..." He was going to speak, to tell Die how much he needed him but there was one other person on the elevator and he had to quell that desire...for now.

Die glanced at Kyo and then smirked a little, just reaching to pat Kyo's shoulder a little, not saying anything. The other occupant minded his own business, just waiting on his floor to get off, exiting. They were only four floors up from that and when they got off, Die almost rushed to the door, impatient as all hell.

Kyo fidgeted as the elevator rose seemingly extra slow, floor-by-floor. When the doors did open, he had to control himself to keep from running out. It took them a few moments to get to their door, another thirty seconds to get the door open and then they were alone and Kyo was pushing Die against the wall of the entry, kissing him desperately.

Die groaned as Kyo pretty much slammed him against the wall. Yes... he liked this, like it a lot. Having Kyo come after him was something that normally got him off real well anyway, but even moreso with their recent problems.

He hooked his fingers into Kyo's belt-loops and tugged him flush against him, his fingers quickly and efficiently undoing Kyo's belt and then getting his pants open.

Kyo pushed his hands into Die's hair, moaning wantonly against his lips, desire radiating throughout his entire being. His hips thrust forward as Die opened his pants, drawing another moan from him. He pulled back long enough to reach down and get Die's pants open, his palm brushing over his length before his hand was sliding to Die's hip, griping it as he pushed his own forward, grinding their lengths together. "Die... I… oh Gods..."

Die's breath caught as Kyo pushed their cocks together, his hand tight on his hip. His head fell back, hitting the wall with a dull thud, his hips jutting out. He was almost painfully hard already, had been since their moment in the office, and his entire being was concentrated on release. He whined faintly, one hand grabbing Kyo's hair, the other on his ass.

Kyo rutted against Die desperately for a few moments, his breath coming in his harsh pants. He pressed his lips to Die's again, griping the front of his shirt as he bucked his hips, sounds of pleasure issuing from his lips. He was close to actually cumming for the first time in a long time and his cock almost hurt from it.

Die kissed him back so passionately it would have been impossible to mistake it for anything else. He whined as Kyo kissed him harshly, bucking against Kyo's body with an equally frantic sort of pace, fingers tight on his ass. He wanted it so badly, wanted Kyo to cum all over him, wanted to see bliss painted on Kyo's face and he concentrated for a moment, even in the midst of all of this, trying to shove his desire out to share it with Kyo, praying it'd help.

Kyo tried, and failed, to keep a consistent rhythm in the movement of his hips, but he eventually resorted to frantically moving against his lover as he moaned against his mouth. 

A blast of desire that wasn't his own infiltrated his mind and he lost it. His head dropped back and he let out a stage worthy cry as he began cumming, his hips never ceasing their movements as his release spurted between them in a seemingly never ending stream, his cock flexing and bobbing from the force of it.

The moment Kyo's head fell back, Die opened his eyes to watch him, his mouth slightly agape in awe of how gorgeous this moment was. He pulled Kyo against him a little bit more and hissed out, "Oh _fuck_ , baby, yes!" Just watching Kyo gave him the last bit that he needed. His own cry mixed with Kyo's own as he pushed his cock up against Kyo's, each spurt of his cum spraying out over his lover's dick, slicking their push against one another.

Kyo managed to reach down between them, his hand wrapped around both of their cum slicked dicks, squeezing as he pushed his hips up a few more times as Die finished. Then he collapsed forward into Die, supporting himself against the wall behind them. "Oh… G-gods... _fuck_..."

Die slid his arm around Kyo to help steady him, knowing how draining this had to be for his lover. He grunted a little and then gave up and slid down into the floor, bringing Kyo with him as carefully as he could. "God we needed that."

Kyo was grateful when Die lowered them to the floor, allowing him to lay against his lover's chest. "Yes. So bad..." He turned his head upward, pressing a chaste kiss to Die's lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby... so damn much." He smiled and ran his hand through Kyo's hair in a gentle sort of manner. "That was amazing."

Kyo hummed softly, his body going slack in the most delicious manner. "Mmhmm... thank you..." He laid quietly for a moment, idly running his hand along Die's leg. "I thought my dick was going to blast off..."

Die let out a laugh and shook his head a little. "I should seriously record you losing it sometime, then we should toss it in on a song and never tell anyone where it came from. Our secret."

Kyo titled his head at the thought then smirked. "We could record it right there in the studio... see what Kaoru thinks about that..."

Die tilted his head back and let out a laugh, shaking his head. "I'm game if you are."

Kyo snorted and leaned in, pressing his face against Die's neck, licking over his Adam's apple. "I'd love to have you blow me when I'm trying to sing..."

Die groaned, his eyes rolling back at the very thought of it. "Oh dear sweet god, please let me do this... and soon!"

Kyo shifted a bit, laughing softly. "The very next time we record... you're cordially invited to get on your knees and use that very talented mouth of yours..."

The sheer phrasing of it was honestly amazing and Die couldn't help the full-out laugh that left him. "God, I love you so fucking much."

Kyo grinned and responded with a passionate kiss. "Mmm, ditto!"


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

Today was a day for lovers to celebrate, in which the men would get chocolate from their girlfriends, co-workers and maybe even mothers. It was Valentine's Day and Kyo had spent all day preparing dinner for Die and after several embarrassed phone calls to his own mother, he had managed to complete the meal without ruining it. The honey chicken looked damn near perfect, its glaze light and just slightly sweet. The miso was a special type. He had taken the time to make it with daikon and braised tofu instead of just plain. Of course he'd also made the standard pot of white rice though he had gone to the trouble to add pink coloring to it, giving it a definite Valentine's feel. To top it all off, he had a large box of traditional wagashi, as well as chocolate. 

When it was nearly time for Die to be home, he arranged everything on the table, using expensive silver and white serving bowls and place settings. He fussed a bit with the sweets, finally getting them set up on a raised tray then went about lighting the candles he had scattered over the table as well as around the room. 

He finally flicked the stereo on to play soft music then went to wash up and change into the clothes he'd been planning to wear. Once he'd taken care of washing his hands, straightening and styling his hair, he donned a pair of tight black jeans and a deep red button up that he'd picked out just for the purpose of it being Die's favorite color.

Now all he had to do was wait for his lover to get home, which shouldn't be long now at all.

Die had gone into the studio per Kaoru's request for the evening, apologizing profusely to Kyo about the fact that he wasn't going to be home for a few hours. After the pair of them had smoothed out some issues with one of the recordings, they both left the studio, headed home to their respective lovers.

Die arrived home as quickly as he could after leaving work, stopping by and picking up the flower order he'd wanted for Kyo, a bouquet of Cactus flowers and red Camellias. The whole thing was wrapped up in white tissue paper and tied together with red and black ribbons. He already had another gift for Kyo at home, despite the fact that he knew White Day was really the day to return such things, he felt silly not sharing in giving things to Kyo on a day like this, especially with so much of his remaining family actually living in America.

He arrived at the door and spent the time to straighten out his hair and his shirt. He was wearing one of his flannel button-up shirts in red, white, and black. Maybe it wasn't the most romantic of outfits he'd ever had, but it was certainly festive. Stepping inside, he ditched his shoes and sniffed the air, a small grin lifting his lips as he made his way into the house.

Kyo had settled on the arm of the couch, playing with the kittens with a bit of ribbon that he was dragging about on the floor. He was about to get up and make sure the food hadn't gotten too cold when he heard the front door. A smile graced his lips as he moved towards the entry hall to greet his lover. "Hey gorgeous, are those flowers for me or you got a girl coming over?," he teased, feeling slightly giddy at the fact that Die had thought of him.

Die chuckled as he presented the flowers to Kyo and then leaned in to kiss his cheek. "Don't worry, it's only us, love." He pushed his hand gently through Kyo's hair, enjoying the spikey sides of it. "Mmm... it smells absolutely divine in here."

Kyo laughed softly and took the flowers, inspecting them then sniffing them appreciatively. He gave Die a small kiss to the side of his mouth then grinned a little. "Well, that is... well come on." He grasped Die's hand, leading him into the kitchen and showing him what he'd set up on the table. He quickly went to get a vase, setting the flowers in it in their paper for the moment then rejoined Die. "I hope... it's okay."

Die's fingers wrapped around Kyo's own as he walked into the kitchen with him. He grinned at the spread on the table. "It's more than okay, it's amazing." He pulled Kyo into his arms and tilted his chin up, kissing his lips softly before he let him go, moving to his chair and settling down, tugging his plate close. "Gorgeous."

Kyo kissed Die back, squeezing his hand. He looked vaguely relieved as Die proclaimed it awesome, even though the other had yet to taste it. Before sitting, he moved to fill Die's plate with the chicken and rice and then pour miso into his bowl. Once he was done with that, he retrieved a pitcher of iced green tea that he'd almost forgotten and filled Die's glass with it before filling his own and setting the tea down. Then he moved to his own chair, choosing to sit right next to Die, and filled his own plate and bowl. He smiled over at Die, raising his glass. "To us..."

Die beamed at Kyo, loving the fact that he was sitting next to him rather than across from him in his usual place. He raised his own glass and clinked it with Kyo's. After a moment, he kissed his cheek gently and then moved to taste the first bite of chicken and rice, delight filling his eyes.

Kyo leaned into Die's kiss, enjoying the affection. He took a sip of his tea then set it down, going for his miso first, using his chopsticks to fish out a bite of daikon, mming softly. Thankfully, everything seemed edible and he was very grateful for that, not having been too confident in his cooking skills, but wanting to make this special for Die.

Things were quiet for a while, Die eating his fill of chicken, rice, and miso. Once he was done, he pushed his plate back and reached for one of the tiny sweets, nibbling from the edge of it with a pleased look. "You remembered everything I love. It's... amazing." He smiled at Kyo and then let out a soft pleased sound. "You know that no one else has ever done something like this for me? Not once."

Kyo was still working on his meal when Die finished and reached for the sweets. Those he had not made, but they were some of the best he'd ever had before, even though he wasn't huge on sweet things. He smiled at Die and reached out to run a hand over the other's leg, squeezing softly. "No one's ever loved you as much as I do."

Die pressed his hand over Kyo's own and smiled at him. "Truer words have never been spoken." His heart thumped in his chest and he smiled, reaching to touch Kyo's heart with his free hand. "I need you like life itself."

Kyo swallowed and set his chopsticks down, placing his hand on top of Die's, grasping his fingers and squeezing tightly for a moment. "I... ditto." He smiled, a little embarrassed as he faltered, just unable to come up with an appropriate response other than 'me, too'.

Die slipped his chair back, picking up another sweet and then tugging Kyo's hand lightly. "Living room?"

Kyo nodded and grabbed a sweet for himself then followed Die into the living room. Before they could sit though, he slipped his arm around Die and pulled him close, nuzzling against his neck. "I love you more that I could ever put into words."

Die chuckled softly, tilting his head to allow Kyo better access to his neck. "I love you, my sweet." He ran his fingers lightly over the other's back, rubbing it in circles.

Kyo hummed softly, letting Die rub his back before eventually moving away to settle on the couch, biting into his wagashi with an appreciative sound. "These really are quite delicious..."

Die settled down, flopping on next to Kyo, his legs over Kyo's lap. "Mmmm... not nearly as delicious as you, but yes."

Kyo smirked a little, finishing up the sweet and licking his fingers, adding a little extra tongue flick as he looked at Die. "I dunno, I prefer to think of myself as spicy..."

Die snorted. "Darling, your jizz is not spicy, trust me on that." He licked his lips a little. "Salty and sometimes a hint of sweet in it, but not spicy."

Kyo raised an eyebrow, his eyes darkening slightly. "Is that so? Care to test that theory...?"

Die eyed him for a long moment before leaning back, closing his eyes and popping the rest of the treat into his mouth. He chewed and swallowed before smirking as he stared up at him. "Not yet, but... soon enough, I promise."

Kyo chuckled lowly, watching Die finish off his treat. "Mm, I'll hold you to that." He reached over, finding Die's hand and lacing their fingers together.

Die smiled softly, moving to lay the other direction, plopping his head in Kyo's lap. "Did you have other things planned or is the rest of the night in?" He winked at him, smirking a little.

Kyo gazed down at Die, pushing his fingers into the other's silky hair, a grin playing on his lips. "Mm, I did have something else... a little less... romantic."  
"Mmm... and that would be?" He licked his lips a little bit and reached up to tug on the longer part of Kyo's hair.

Kyo let his hand trail downward, slipping it into the top of Die's shirt to caress his chest lightly. "Leaving heart shaped marks on your gorgeous little ass..."

Die's eyebrows rose a little and then he grinned, getting the idea. "You want to spank me?"

Kyo flushed just the slightest bit though he was still smiling. "Actually, I do... because I want to see you writhing beneath me… begging me to stop, but so aroused you can't stand it..."

"I think I can handle that, just for you." He grinned up at him. "But I have one request for you... if you're willling."

Kyo licked his lips, removing his hand from Die's shirt to stroke over his lover's collarbone. "Anything for you, this is _our_ night..."

Die bit his lip a little bit and then murmured, "I'd love to have your lips wrapped around me."

Kyo smiled softly, loving the way Die was asking for him to suck him off. He shifted and leaned down, kissing him deeply for a moment though the angle was awkward. When he pulled up, he smirked. "I think I can handle that...."

Die grinned at him a little and squirmed during the kiss. "Mmm... you're so perfect, you know that?"

Kyo huffed a little and reached down to tweak Die's nipple through his shirt. "Nowhere near it, but with you, anything is perfect."

Die beamed up at his lover, though he squeaked slightly when his nipple was tweaked. "Gah! Those are sensitive tonight!"

Kyo raised an eyebrow then smirked, moving his other hand down to tweak both of Die's nipples at the same time. "They are?"

Die gasped, his hips jerking up as he gave him a freaked out look and then whined a little. "Kyooooo!"

Kyo, perplexed by Die's reaction, stopped pinching and instead just ran his palms over the little buds lightly through the shirt. "I love it when you whine for me..."

Die gasped a little and then chuckled. "I wasn't kidding, they are incredibly sensitive today!" He rubbed his head a little on Kyo's crotch, giving him a wicked look.

Kyo gave a soft grunt when Die's head pressed against his crotch, his growing arousal becoming obvious. "I think that perhaps it's time to move this into the bedroom..." He gave Die's nipples another good pinch then pushed him up, getting ready to stand.

Die smirked up at him, slipping from the couch and sauntering off toward the bedroom, making sure to sway his hips in an inviting manner, trying to get Kyo to come after him faster.

Kyo couldn't help but enjoy the view and indeed, he did jump up quickly and go after Die. He caught up with him and grasped his hips, pushing him against the wall and grinding a little roughly against his ass.

Die gasped as he was pushed against the wall, Kyo's hard cock pressing against his ass through their clothing. "Mmm... I love it when you can't stand it... you just want me so badly it has to be now."

Kyo grunted softly, pushing against Die a bit more before he finally settled down enough to pull away, letting out a little pant of breath. "You wind me up like no other..."

Die found himself hard by the time Kyo was done. He licked his lips a little and tugged him after him. "Come here. I want your mouth around my fucking dick."

Kyo's growled lowly, following Die then stopping him once they got in the bedroom. He immediately dropped to his knees, smirking up at Die as he leaned forward and started to mouth him through his jeans, raking his teeth over the tip.

Die groaned, pushing his hand into Kyo's hair, staring down at him as Kyo started to suck him through his jeans. "Oh god... just like that. Keep doing that." He pushed his hands into Kyo's hair even further, thrusting against his lover's mouth for a moment.

Kyo squirmed a bit as Die reacted. He found it so fucking erotic, hearing and seeing his lover start to come undone, get desperate. He reached up with his hand, smoothing the material of Die's jeans over his cock and mouthed the head, lapping at it with his tongue, wetting the material.

Die shivered slightly, his eyes slipping to half-mast. "Fuck... Kyo..." he hissed out as he pushed Kyo's mouth against him a little more. "Shit!"

Kyo gave a Die a dirty look and pulled back enough to speak, licking his lips. "I should make you jizz in your pants..." He didn't wait for an answer, just went back to what he was doing, moving upward along Die's cock, using his teeth now and then.

Die let out something that was half-laugh, half-groan, bucking his hips forward. "Mmm.... yes... fuck, you should." He barely held himself back from jamming Kyo's face completely against his crotch, desperately wanting what Kyo was giving him right then.

Kyo smirked and brought his hand up to press and stroke over the length of Die's cock while he focused on mouthing and biting at the head, his other hand going to grasp Die's ass.

"Shit... Kyo!" He growled out his lover's name as he tilted his head back. "Damnit! You're gonna make me fucking jizz my goddamned pants!"

Kyo groaned and pulled back for a split second. "Then fucking do it, cum in your pants!" He wrapped his lips around the head of Die's dick, pressing his tongue against the tip as hard as he could, moving his hand faster as he glanced up to watch his lover's face. Unable to help himself, he reached down with one hand and hurriedly undid his own pants, reaching in to grope his achingly hard length.

Die's hips jerked toward Kyo and he whined a little bit. It took him a little bit more before he finally lost it. He tilted his head back and let out a sharp whine and then, "Y- fuck yes!" And with that, he spilled himself inside his pants, spurt after spurt of his cum shooting out into his pants, darkening the material.

Kyo moaned as he felt Die's cum soaking through the pants. He lapped at the material, tasting his lover. He gave Die a few moments then reached up and unfastened his lover's pants, tugging them and his soiled boxers out of the way before starting to lick all along his thigh, cleaning up the mess. Once he'd done that, he took Die's softening length into his mouth, sucking lightly.

"Fuck," he whimpered a little, brushing his hand through Kyo's hair as the other licked at his trail of cum and then at his dick. "God you're amazing."

Kyo was somewhat reluctant to release Die's length, spending several more moments sucking and licking at it. Finally though, he pulled back and licked his lips, gazing up at his lover with a tiny smirk. "I try..."

Die eventually tried to get Kyo to move back from him, whimpering a little bit. "Sensitive," he whispered out, shivering slightly.

Kyo chuckled softly, sitting back on his heels as he reached down to stroke his own dick a couple of times. "I just can't get enough of you..."

Die chuckled, pulling Kyo up and then flopping back on the bed, shoving his pants off in the process. He turned over onto his stomach and then pulled his shirt off. "Mmm... come get me, sweetheart."

Kyo got to his feet and watched Die, gazing at him as he stripped out of his clothes. Part of him wanted to skip the spanking he had planned and go straight into pounding his lover's sweet ass into the bed. However, he had been wanting to do this for a while, so he moved to the closet and came back with a black leather paddle, cut in the shape of a heart. "I'll give you the option of being tied or not."

Die peered back at Kyo and the paddle. He debated for a moment and then chuckled. "I think I would rather be untied, though I promise I will stay perfectly still for you." He grinned and then grabbed a pillow, hugging onto it while he pushed his ass up in the air.

Kyo grinned a little and moved behind Die, smoothing his hand over his lover's bare ass for a moment. "You know if it gets too much, just say the word," he murmured before stepping back and raising the paddle, giving Die a light spank. He repeated this action a couple of times then went harder, biting his lip as Die's pale skin began to redden, the shape of the paddle clear.

Die nodded a little and took a deep breath, waiting on Kyo to start. When he did, he started to moan, wiggling his ass a little bit, enjoying what Kyo was doing to him. As Kyo started to spank him harder, he began to moan and whimper, his body jerking a little bit.

Kyo adored Die's reactions and he found himself ramping it up more, alternating between soft pats and really hard smacks that made Die's ass jiggle a bit. He made sure to switch cheeks now and then, not wanting to damage his lover.

Die took as much of it as he possibly could before he whimpered a little and flopped over to the side. He'd bother with the safe word if he needed it, but Kyo generally took his actions in the right ways.

Kyo couldn't help but laugh a little as Die flopped over to escape the paddle. He gave the other's hip a lite swat then tossed the paddle aside, moving to stand near Die's head, his eyes full of lust. "Mm, too much?"

Die reached back to rub his warm butt-cheeks. "Mmm... getting a bit toasty." He licked his lips a little and pursed his lips up at Kyo. "Now fuck me into the mattress, my love."

Kyo smirked a little, shifting to reach out and lightly stroke his lover's red rear. "Still sexy as hell." He licked his lips and reached into the drawer, getting out a strawberry scented lube and pouring a good amount onto his fingers. Lightly pushing Die onto his back, he settled between his legs and began stroking his fingers along the other's crack, spreading the lube around before finally pushing a finger into Die's body with a groan.

Die shivered a little bit and closed his eyes, spreading his legs to give Kyo the access he craved. "Please..."

Kyo didn't spend a lot of time being gentle, knowing that Die could more than handle a little roughness. He set about thrusting his finger in and out at a quick pace then added the second, spreading and scissoring them. He was impatient, but the teasing and foreplay were always a turn on for him.

Die groaned softly, his hips arching up toward his lover. Despite having just cum, he was still sensitive and everything was definitely pleasurable for him. "Kyo," he whispered out, one hand coming up to tangle in his own hair, lightly tugging.

Kyo finally pulled his fingers free of Die's passage, grabbing the lube to slick some over his cock, taking a few moment to enjoy the feeling of stroking himself. He made a show of it, tilting his head back and pushing his hips into his hand, moaning lowly. Before he got too carried away though, he stopped and wiped his hands on his shirt, then tugged it off over his head. He left his pants on, pushing them out of the way before shifting forward and grasping Die's thigh with one hand, using the other to guide himself to his lover's entrance. He slowly pushed in, moaning as tight heat engulfed him. "Gods... Die..."

Die lay there panting softly as Kyo went about prepping him. He arched up toward him with a whimper, his back bowing off the bed. When Kyo pulled his fingers free, he sort of collapsed down on the bed, watching Kyo as he pleasured himself. "Yes, show me what you like best."

The moment that Kyo stopped and tossed his shirt away, Die spread his legs a little wider, offering himself to Kyo in the best way he knew how. As he pushed in, he gasped, shuddering. "Fuck!"

Once Kyo was fully seated within his lover's body, he shifted forward and braced himself with his hands on either side of Die's body. He groaned softly as he began thrusting, the pace slow for the moment. He took advantage and leaned down to catch Die's lips in a deep kiss, pushing his tongue into his mouth.

Die let out a soft whine into Kyo's mouth, one leg lifting up to tug the other closer, his desperation of the moment causing him to want the other to come closer to him in every conceivable way. His tongue danced with his lover's, his body shifting beneath Kyo's in an attempt to help with the pleasure.

Upon feeling Die's leg pressing against his back, Kyo shifted his arm, looping it under his lover's torso, nearly laying on him. He broke the kiss to bury his face into Die's neck, placing damp, half -formed kisses to the skin he could reach as his hips drove him deeper within the body beneath him.

Die cried out with each and every thrust, his grip on his lover growing tighter and tighter. He was in that place that Kyo drove him to, the brink of heaven, a place to just float in until it all exploded in one glorious moment. Striving for that, he arched higher, a half-gasped, "Please," falling from his lips.

Die's cries and his own building pleasure made Kyo lose his rhythm, his pace faltering and his movements becoming more erratic. He moaned against Die's neck, pressing closer to his body, trapping his rigid length between their abdomens. He was so close to flying off that edge, every pant of breath held a whispered plea of Die's name.

Die's fingers curled, his nails lightly scraping over skin. He knew it had to be light because he couldn't ruin tattoos, but he was feeling like he wanted to just dig in, to simply become Kyo as he was consumed with this overwhelming feeling. With a soft cry, he plunged over the edge, his head falling back and his body arching hard off the bed as he began to cum.

Kyo's body shuddered with pleasure as he felt blunt nails digging into his skin. Some part of him, deep within, wished they would claw until they drew blood. He raised up as he felt Die begin to cum, wanting to watch his lover's face contort with bliss. It didn't take him long to find his own, a keening moaning sliding past his lips as he thrust hard into Die's body then still, his cock filling his lover's passage.

Die let out a soft sound when he felt Kyo's cock twitch and warmth flood his passage. He moved his hips a few times, trying to help Kyo feel even better and then stilled when it became too much again, whimpering a little bit.

Kyo felt nearly weak as he finished then slowly sank down to lay half on, half off Die's chest, shivers going through him as Die's muscles still contracted around his softening length. "Gods..."

Die chuckled softly, reaching up to run his hands through Kyo's hair, rubbing at him with a happy groan. "That... was damn good."

Kyo let out a breathless chuckle, turning to kiss the side of Die's mouth. "Uh huh..." He was unable to come up with anything more than that, his mind like mush. The fact that he'd actually cum was not lost on him either and it felt like he'd literally spilled all of his life force into Die's body with it.

Die tugged Kyo down, pressing a kiss to his lips and then chuckling softly. "Mmm... left your brain all mushy. I like it."

Kyo snorted, reaching out to just wrap his arm around Die before returning the kiss. "Mmm... love you."

"I love you, too, my sweet, delicious, wonderful man." He punctuated each and every compliment with another kiss over Kyo's face.

Kyo blushed faintly, his hand coming up to brush through Die's hair. "Mmm. What would I do without you?"

Die tugged the short strands on the other man's hair and he chuckled. "Mmm... wither up into an old prune and be pissed off all the time?"

Kyo huffed playfully and thumped Die on the chest. "I would not _wither_!" He didn't contest the other part though because surely he would be reduced to a curmudgeonly grouch without Die's light in his heart.

Die clucked his tongue and kissed Kyo once more. "You were doing a good job of it before I let on to my feelings."

Kyo grumbled into the kiss, pushing Die's face away and putting on a false pout. "That's it... next show, I'm donning rainbow glitter pants and disco balls."

Die looked at Kyo's face and then down at his balls and then back up, his lips twitching. "D-disco balls?" He snorted, unable to hold it in.

Scooting back and sitting up, Kyo puffed out his cheeks, flailing his hand a bit. "I meant have disco balls on the damn stage… not..." He let out an exasperated breath. "You know what I meant!

"I know exactly what you meant, but that doesn't mean I can't take it wrong!" He chuckled, putting his hands behind his head and letting his legs flop open, giving Kyo free reign to move.

Kyo slid from Die's body completely then flopped over, poking his lover in the ribs. "Brat."

Die smirked at him and then yawned widely. "Mmm... always have been, always will be."

Kyo, feeling too good right then to be serious about anything, stuck his tongue out at Die, then smirked. "Gotta pee." With that, he rolled over until he was at the edge of the bed then stood up, padding stark naked into the bathroom on slightly wobbly legs.

Die watched his lover leave the bed, desire of another kind swelling inside his stomach. But he simply rolled over and closed his eyes rather than getting up, hoping to at least hear him. For whatever reason, he didn't want to sully everything with his strange fetishes tonight, he just wanted to leave it at the fact that his lover had actually, fully gotten off without them having to do all kinds of meditation first.

Kyo took care of business, chuckling to himself when Die didn't follow, figuring he wouldn't have with the way the mood was tonight. He finished up and washed his hands before grabbing a washcloth to clean himself up then rinsed it and squeezed it. He took it with him to the bedroom, smiling at his lover's form. 

"You're gorgeous like that... hair all tousled and pleasure still swimming in your eyes." He moved to the bed, sitting next to Die and beginning to clean him up some, starting with his stomach then going between his legs, getting as much as he could before tossing the washcloth towards the laundry hamper. 

He moved and laid beside Die, wrapping his arm around the other's waist, nuzzling against his neck.

Die let out a soft huff of breath when Kyo touched him with the wash cloth. He smiled a little and rolled over onto his back again, spreading his legs and letting the other clean him up. He let out a rumbling little sound and arched slightly when Kyo cleaned his ass, making a tiny face. This was always so demeaning, though sweet of Kyo to care enough to clean him up. Still... it made him feel childish to be cleaned by someone else. He licked his lips a little bit and then settled. "Any other plans for tonight or shall we sleep?"

Kyo chuckled softly and shifted to kiss Die on the lips. "If you had other plans, love, you're on your own. Perhaps I could muster more energy come morning though." To be honest, he was just slightly scared of pushing it too far just yet, not wanting to overdo it and run into a frustrating situation again.

Die leaned up and kissed his lips again before flopping back and then scooching the covers down from under his ass. "We're good." He reached over and flicked off the light. "Just out of curiosity, do you still miss Puchi and Buchi?"

Kyo was just getting comfortable, snuggling under the covers when Die asked an unexpected question. He blinked then raised his head to look at Die's face, his eyebrows raised. "W-why do you ask that? I mean, yeah. They were brats but... I adored them."

Die nodded a little and reached to gently stroke his hand through Kyo's hair. "Just wondering, that's all."

Kyo hummed and settled again, laying his head against Die's shoulder. "Ahh, just threw me for a loop. Seemed to come out of nowhere." He chuckled softly and kissed Die's skin where he could reach, his eyes sliding closed.

"You know as well as I do that my mind flits everywhere." He grinned into the darkness and then rolled toward Kyo, snuggling up to him.

Kyo laughed at that, his hand stroking over Die's chest. "Mm, very true...You know, Puchi used to amuse the hell out of me. I would give them stuff like carrots or something and Buchi would eat it up right away but Puchi would take it and hide it somewhere in their bedding. Then like a week later, I look over and he's happily eating his not-so-fresh carrot. It was like, what the hell man?!"

Die chuckled. "One hoarder, one instant gratification. Sounds like a good pair to me."

"Maybe so, but I'm not sure Buchi appreciated Puchi's hoarding." He chuckled then settled down, his mind going over little escapades of his late pets.

Die snuggled in close to Kyo and yawned again. "It's funny how just being in bed makes me tired somehow," he murmured quietly.

Kyo smirked slightly. "Yeah, I'm sure it had nothing to do with what just transpired in said bed."

"Nope. Nothing at all." He stifled another yawn and burrowed his face against Kyo's neck. "Mmm... night love!"

Kyo let out a snort then yawned himself, digging his fingers in Die's hair, his eyes closed as he slowly started dozing. "Night."


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

Die had woken up at the crack of dawn, packing up a bag for Kyo and a bag for himself, getting it all in the car along with some snacks, and then sneaking around so Kyo wouldn't wake up until he was ready for him to. He had gotten the other to shower the night before, convincing him it'd be nice to cuddle naked and clean in the bed all night.

After about fifty minutes, Die slipped into the bedroom and plopped on the bed, right over Kyo's groin. He started to grind himself against the other, licking his lips as he stared down at his sleeping lover. "Come on, baby... wake up."

Kyo had been sleeping rather soundly, enjoying an erotic dream in which Die was giving him all kinds of pleasure. It took him several moments to realize that instead of a dream, it was reality and he finally opened one eye to gaze up at Die as his hips rolled upward. "Hnng...mornin'..."

"Morning, baby..." he leaned down and kissed him soundly on the lips, rolling his hips again. "Do you want to cum, you sexy beast?"

Kyo's eyes fully opened at this point and he reached out, grasping Die's hips as he kissed him back deeply, the effects of Die's actions along with his previous dream completely obvious. "Mmg... yes, please."

"Good." Die shifted slightly, nipping down Kyo's neck and then to his throat, sucking hard on his Adam's apple. He pulled back enough to pull down his sweat pants, freeing his cock and then pressed back down against him with a groan. "Ah, yeah... sweetheart... you're so hard already." He chuckled, tossing his head back and moaning as he bucked a little harder.

Kyo shuddered, letting out a low moan as Die worked over him. "Ah… Gods... Die," he panted out, thrusting his hips up hard and fast in a desperate manner for a moment before settling again. "Was… nng... dreaming..."

Die leaned down over his lover, settling his arms on either side of him. His breath ghosted over Kyo's chest, one hand tracing down over his hip, lightly playing with the vein he found there. "Tell me..." He thrust his hips again, slowing down with concerted effort, slowly brushing his now fully hard cock over the length of Kyo's.

Kyo moved one hand to tangle in Die's hair, tugging the strands lightly. He was very quickly nearing his end when Die slowed a bit, allowing him to prolong his pleasure for now. "You were blowing me in some park... felt so damn good..."

Die groaned softly. "How did I look, baby? Was I enjoying myself?" He continued with his achingly slow pace the entire time, just the tip of his dick sliding over the underside of Kyo's length.

Kyo struggled to keep control of himself despite the fact that his cock was twitching beneath Die's. He let out a moan, rolling his hips up, seeking more friction. "A-ah... yes... you were eager for it."

Die let out a soft gasp as Kyo pushed his cock against Die's own a bit more. He shuddered slightly, grasping Kyo's hips and holding them down as he moved a little faster, but still only faintly allowed their dicks to touch. "Kyo," he hissed out, his cock jerking as he started to cum, the small amount of friction doing it for him in the most obvious of manners. He threw back his head, still very lightly grazing his cock over Kyo's as he spurted across the other's cock and stomach.

Kyo stared up at Die, groaning faintly as the other started to cum. Not to be outdone, he reached down to gather up some of Die's jizz on his fingers. He smeared the mess on the head of his cock then wrapped his hand around the base stroking rather quickly as he let Die brush against the top. "Fuck baby..."

Die groaned as Kyo started to jerk off, using his cum as lubrication for it. He stared down at him, watching as the last few spurts of his cum landed across the head of Kyo's length. "Oh gods," he hissed out, reaching down to bat Kyo's hand away, taking up his exact pace for him.

Kyo grunted when Die took over for him, his hips jerking up. "Ah… so close..." He bucked against Die for just a minute more then he cried out, cumming hard enough that it spattered up to his chest. "O-oh... Gods!"

Die let out a growl as Kyo started to cum. He licked his lips a little bit and smirked. "Hnn... baby... got it all pent up?"

Kyo let out a moan as the last bit of cum leaked from his cock. He shuddered slightly and gaze up at Die. "Hnn... yes..."

Die smiled down at his lover, licking his lips slightly. "Mmm... do you have any idea how much I love it when you get it that far and all over yourself?"

Kyo pulled his hand up, patting at his chest and feeling his cum there, letting out a soft laugh. He reached up with his clean hand to stroke through Die's hair, smirking. "Mm... all thanks to you, baby."

Die leaned down, kissing Kyo gently on the tip of his nose. He pulled back and gently tapped Kyo on the thigh. "Stay put for a minute, gonna clean you up, mr.-splashed-it-all-over-himself." He chuckled as he rolled off the bed and headed out of the room.

Coming back a few minutes later, he settled down beside Kyo, gently wiping him up with a wet cloth. After a moment, he settled back to wash himself off as well. "So... I have a surprise for you. Get up and dressed... and you'll get to be taken to your surprise!"

Kyo huffed a little but laid there, getting his breath back while Die went to get a washcloth. He smiled slightly then raised an eyebrow. "A surprise hm? Whatever for?" 

He rolled over and stood up, wandering to the bathroom to take a piss and brush his teeth before getting boxers to tug on. After that, he slipped on a pair of comfortable jeans and a simple black button up, turning to Die for his approval. "Well? Is this good enough for my… surprise?"

Die smirked at him and then licked his lips a little. "Well... let's say... happy birthday, baby." He moved around, putting on jeans instead of his sweat pants and making sure he didn't have any cum on his shirt before settling against the wall.

Kyo blushed a little but moved over to Die, leaning up on tiptoe to kiss him softly. "Thank you." He brushed his hand over Die's cheek. "I will say right off that you know you didn't have to go to whatever trouble you did to do anything for me..."

Die pressed his finger to Kyo's lips. "Ssshhh... I'll go to whatever trouble I want for you, baby."

Kyo just huffed but his lips curved upward as he moved into the bathroom again to comb his hair, adding a little gel to it and styling it a bit. He wandered back to the bedroom and slid on a chain necklace and a couple of black beaded bracelets. "Ready now..."

Die just followed him around, right behind him, room-to-room. Once Kyo said he was ready, Die simply gestured him after him. "C'mon then. Off to surprise-ville!" He headed for the door, opening it and letting Kyo out in front of him, looking way too pleased with himself.

Kyo stared at Die suspiciously as he hovered nearby. It was a little unsettling but the smile on his lover's face was too precious and he was loathe to say anything that would take it away. He chuckled and grabbed his wallet and keys off of the hall table then stepped into his boots before heading out.

Die just shoved his feet in flip-flops, as he followed Kyo out the door, locking it behind them. "To the car!" He bounced along the hallway, looking completely ridiculous, he was so happy.

Kyo chuckled and made his way to the car, taking the stairs instead of waiting for the elevator. He led the way then stood beside Die's car. "You're way too giddy, baby..."

"Oh, you have no fucking idea." Die slid into the car, a huge grin on his face as he buckled up.  
Kyo raised an eyebrow as he slipped into the car, settling in, wondering where the hell they were going. "Die, if this is a surprise party... I need some kind of warning..." Being thrust into a huge crowd without preparation was not something he looked forward to, no matter the occasion.

"Nope, not a surprise party. In fact, I promise you it'll just be me and you." He stared the car and pulled out, quickly leaving the parking garage and pointing the car toward Kyoto. He grinned as maneuvered the car onto the nearest on-ramp and headed out. "You're going to be so happy, I promise!"

Kyo hummed and leaned back, yawning a little as they got underway. "Well, I trust you to be honest but... we'll see." He was smiling as he spoke despite sounding skeptical.

Die reached over and patted Kyo's thigh. "You have two choices. Either you can have some of the energy drinks in the cooler behind my seat. Or you can go to sleep and I'll wake you when we're where we're going."

Kyo yawned again and glanced back at the cooler, debating his options. "If you don't mind, I think I'll take a nap... if it's gonna be a while..."

"Go for it." Die turned on the music, setting it to something soothing enough for Kyo to sleep to, but still something he could stay awake with as well. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, setting a reasonable speed as he headed down the road.

Kyo smiled a little and reached over to run his hand over Die's leg briefly before getting more comfortable in his seat, his eyes sliding shut. He really didn't have any problem nodding off, given that the sun had just barely come up and he'd gone to bed well after midnight.

The drive was easy, a clear route from Tokyo to Kyoto. He took his time and hours later, they arrived at one of the temples that Kyo had expressed loving the most from his time living in Kyoto.

He parked and then reached over, gently shaking Kyo awake. "Baby... we're at the first stop."

Kyo snuffled a little in his sleep then woke up, glancing over at Die before stretching and rubbing his eyes. He looked around the parking lot, eyes still squinted from sleep and unable to really see anything about where they might be. "Mmm... where?"

"Here, come on... get out." He patted his leg gently and then took off his seat belt, finishing off the energy drink he had been sipping at the whole time. He crushed the can and slid out of the car, sniffing a bit. "You'll see, sweetheart."

Kyo hummed and slipped out of the car, stretching again, his shirt riding up. He looked around, finding his surroundings more and more familiar. He blinked a couple of times then turned to Die, his mouth slightly agape. "Die... are we... are we in _Kyoto_?!"

Die flushed slightly and then nodded. "Yeah... we are." He gestured Kyo along with him as he went toward the back of the car. "I um... given where we are, I wouldn't show any outward affection for a little bit, okay?" He licked his lips slightly and gestured toward a sign reading Sanjusangendo.

Kyo froze to the spot, looking around and taking in a deep breath of the air of his hometown, a feeling of strong nostalgia sweeping over him. He wanted so badly to go to Die and kiss him deeply but he did restrain himself, especially given that they were on temple grounds. He settled for a look that spoke droves of how much this meant to him then moved to stand by Die, murmuring softly. "This is… amazing… Koi."

Die's lips curled up into a lovely smile. He started off toward the doors. "Mmm... I listened to you and this seemed like the best place I could possibly take you." He pushed his hands into his pockets, heading down the path from the parking area toward the main entrance of the temple grounds.

Kyo flushed a little, ducking his head down to hide the smile that graced his lips, happily walking beside Die as they entered the temple. He took in the scent of the ancient wood and faint smell of incense clinging to the timbers and it gave him a sense of peace that he could find nowhere else.

Die entered the temple, smiling broadly as he left his prayer donation and quietly exchanged his shoes for temple slippers. He entered the first chamber, looking at the various kannon statues, hoping this would mean as much to Kyo as he thought it would.  
Kyo left a rather hefty donation of his own and, after slipping into slippers himself, followed along with Die, gazing with reverence at the statues, sending silent prayers to each. His entire demeanor was changed the moment they stepped into the main hall, quiet and pensive but not in a brooding way.

Kyo, too, was thankful for the smaller crowd, made up of mostly elderly Japanese and a few tourists. He moved over to where Die was and lit his own incense, placing it in the burner then stepping back, bowing slightly. He hesitated for a moment then reached out and gently took Die's hand, holding it for several moments before releasing it with a squeeze. It might have been unorthodox but in that moment, he asked the Gods for their acceptance of his and Die's relationship.

Die just squeezed Kyo's hand gently, smiling a little. It was just a small sign of affection and he figured everyone would write it off given he'd just squeezed his hand. He sniffed slightly and then opened his eyes, pursing his lips slightly as he stood up. He took a deep breath and then made his way toward the end of the hallway, taking in everything there was to look at.

Kyo moved along, taking in the sights, feeling light and very happy just then. He paused to gaze upon the statue that gave him the inspiration for his tattoo.  
Die turned down the other hallway, heading out toward the back area, silently mouthing a prayer to himself as he went, feeling oddly at peace with himself as he made his way through the extraordinarily calming temple.

Kyo wandered around a bit a different way then met up with Die again, standing beside him, his voice low as he spoke. "I never get tired of coming here."

Die glanced at Kyo when they met up again. He'd been standing in front of the gorgeous landscaping out back. He licked his lips a little and tilted his head back. "It's so peaceful here... I like it."

Kyo nodded and pointed to a small bench, moving towards it and settling down. "I love the way it makes me feel."

Die followed after Kyo, settling down on the bench next to him. He turned his face up toward the sun, taking in a deep breath. "It's gorgeous... so very gorgeous."

Kyo smiled and patted Die's leg. "Indeed it is... so wonderful." He sat there for a moment the staring the fountain set up in one corner. After a few moments, he started to hum softy. It was an old tune, one that was fitting for where they were.

Die closed his eyes, just letting the sun warm him as Kyo began humming, enjoying the mixture of emotions that swirled around them. He smiled as he sat there, feeling freer than he had in a long, long time.

Kyo finished up the tune, letting the last note trail off quietly. He sat there in silence, just feeling, going deep within himself and finding less shadow than there had been in a long time. He couldn't help the moisture that collected at the corner of his eyes and before long, had to reach up to wipe them, ducking his head as he did.

Die didn't comment on it, didn't draw attention to the fact that Kyo was crying. It seriously wasn't something he needed Kyo to know he noticed. He licked his lips a little and shifted slightly on his seat, watching the people slowly move past, only a handful of them still.

Kyo let out a huff after a few moments and scrubbed his hands over his face before turning to Die and offering him a soft smile. "Ready to view the rest?"

Die nodded a little and pushed himself up off the bench, motioning Kyo after him. He walked along, the gravel crunching underfoot as they went, the air in the gardens utterly serene. "It's so nice here," he murmured quietly.

Kyo hummed softly, glancing around then reaching out to grasp Die's hand, just desperately needing the contact right then. Fortunately, there weren't many people about so he didn't feel worried about being seen. 

"Die, this is just... amazing..."

Die smiled at the other, squeezing his fingers a little bit, figuring if Kyo was okay with holding his hand, then he was fine with it as well. He'd mostly been abstaining from doing anything like that because he didn't think Kyo would want the world to possibly see.

He nodded a little as they stopped by the small pond area. He studied it for a moment and then closed his eyes, saying a brief prayer in his head, feeling the need for it right then, at that moment, not hesitating in the feeling of it.

Kyo smiled as Die paused and looked as though he were praying. He offered his own thanks to the Kami, feeling like he could never give enough for all that he was blessed with right then. 

He walked a little bit further, pausing to examine an inscription on a statue there in the garden while waiting for Die.

Die finished up rather quickly, just having sent a short prayer about what he had for later, surprise-wise. He headed after Kyo, almost a bit sad they were already near the exit. Catching up, he fell in step next to him gave him a brilliant smile. "One more stop after this, though that one can last as long as you like... well... within reason. Not like a week or something." He laughed.  
Kyo glanced up and chuckled at Die, shaking his head. "Okay then." He couldn't stop the excitement that bubbled up in him, wondering what Die could have planned. After all, bringing him to Kyoto was enough, everything else was just icing on the birthday cake. 

He licked his lips and nodded towards the exit. "I guess I'm ready then..."

Die lead them out the gate and then to the car in the parking lot. He leaned against the bumper and took a goofy-ass photo of himself, sending it off to management for them to maybe put in meisyo de meisyu. He turned the camera on Kyo, taking a candid shot of him coming out a bit behind him from the gates. It was a good photo, full of emotion and hope. This one he sent to himself, not wanting to share it with anyone else.

Kyo caught Die taking the photo of him and wrinkled up his face, too late to stop it though. He laughed and walked over to Die, running his hand up his arm. "Don't be sending that off to people."

"Nope... it's mine." He pocketed his phone and after a quick glance around, he leaned in and pressed his lips to Kyo's own, his hand on the side of his face for a single moment. 

When he pulled back, he offered Kyo a small smile, opening his car and slipping inside, cranking the engine. "You may hate me for the next part... but I really hope not."

Kyo's breath hitched at the kiss, a shiver going through him as he reached up to place his hand over Die's briefly. After the other pulled away, he slipped into the car then looking over at him, frowning a little. "Er... that doesn't sound promising..." He chewed his lip a little, contemplating what Die could have in store.

Die pulled out of the parking lot and headed down a route that he seemed to be very cautious about ensuring he was doing it correctly. When he'd turn, he'd look closely at landmarks and street signs before doing it, and was overall driving more like an old woman than his usual half-reckless self.

Kyo glanced over at Die a few times, eyebrow raised as they drove along. "Die, where are we going exactly? And do you know how to get there? You look lost..."

"I know exactly where I'm going... and I'm trying to do it without the GPS so you don't know where I'm going." He smirked a little as he turned again. "AND I'm trying to do it from the back way so you don't catch on."

Kyo snorted and shook his head, leaning back to close his eyes. "Fine, I'll just stay like this then so I don't ruin the surprise." He chuckled and reached over, resting his hand on Die's leg, sighing softly. His lover was adorable when he had a surprise or a secret.

Die made more of a straight shot for his target with Kyo having his eyes closed, trusting his lover to let him get them there quicker this way, without him peeking. 

Finally, he arrived at their destination, pulling up in front of Kyo's parent's home and cutting the engine. "Do not open your eyes... and stay here." He got out and moved to stand in Kyo's line of sight in front of the car, making a quick call.

When Kyo's father answered, Die simply said. "We're here," and hung up. A few moments later, Kyo's parents emerged from the house, his father moving to open the door to the car and then kneeling down. "You can open your eyes now."

Kyo blinked his eyes open at the sound of his father's voice, staring at him for a moment then smiling a little. "Well, well, small world hm?" He slipped out of the car and shook his father's hand before turning to briefly hug his mother who was standing just behind him. 

Kyo's father chuckled lowly and nodded towards Die. "When he said he was bringing you to Kyoto, I told him your mother would be rather upset if you two didn't come by..."

Kyo's mother beamed, patting Kyo's cheek. "That's right! You were coming right by the place anyway." She fussed over Kyo's hair a bit, rubbing at the shaved bits with a frown. "Tsk, you rockers, always changing your hair."

Die stood pressed against the car, his hip jutting out a little bit, one hand on the warm hood. He watched them as they spoke together, smiling softly at the way they interacted with one another. It was better than usual, less awkward, and he felt like somehow he was bridging the gap for them, making them a better family in some small way. Or at least that was the hope in his heart.

Kana finished fussing with Kyo's hair and grumbling about how pale he looked then turned on Die, clucking her tongue as she lightly poked him in the ribs. 

"You're feeding Tooru, but you aren't feeding yourself! You should really take home some of this nabe I just made. It's good and hearty!" 

Hiro rolled his eyes at his wife's complaints, chuckling as she prodded at Die. "Dear, they're busy... I'm sure Daisuke's getting enough to eat, Tooru would make sure of that."

Die looked a bit taken aback, blinking at Kana and then flushing slightly as she poked at him. "I will not turn down free food," he replied, running a hand awkwardly through his hair. He shot Hiro a grateful look at the reply and finally pushed away from the car.

Kyo shot Die an apologetic look then cleared his throat. "How about we have some tea...?" He knew his mother would fuss over how "thin" anyone was and he hoped that Die wasn't too put off by it.

Die nodded. "Tea would be wonderful... and some of the nabe if it's not too much trouble." He figured that should sort of hush her up about his weight when she saw him eat, given that he usually did it quickly and in rather large quantities when they were busy with touring and whatnot.

Kana smiled and nodded her head, turning to lead the way into the house. "Of course. It's no trouble at all! It's still on the burner, nice and hot!" She bustled into the house and started the tea and got down a bowl for Kyo and Die. 

Hiro followed along, clapping Die on the shoulder for a moment then giving Kyo a half smile before heading into the kitchen with his wife, attempting to help.

Die slipped into the house behind them, taking off his shoes at the door and then padding into the kitchen. He settled down in a chair and pushed one out for Kyo right next to him, smirking a little. "Mmm... it smells amazing."

Kyo followed them all in, shaking his head at the exchange. He slipped out of his own shoes and then wandered in to make himself comfortable. "Yes, it smells excellent really..." 

Kana flushed the slightest bit and shook her head. "No, no, it’s really nothing!" She came out of the kitchen with coffee arranged on a tray all done up nice. "Dig in boys!"

Die licked his lips a little bit and then picked up his spoon and dug in, moaning a little bit around the food in his mouth. After chewing and swallowing, he murmured, "Oh gods this is delicious." He shivered a little and began to eat even more of it, looking up at Kyo's parents appreciatively.

Kyo went after his food a bit more slowly but made a few pleased noises as he ate, smiling at his mother and father. Holding his chopsticks in one hand, he moved the other over to lay on Die's knee, feeling very happy and at home. 

Hiro beamed at them all then dug into his own meal, definitely the type to be quiet and focus on the food rather than conversation, though Kyo's little actions didn't go unnoticed. 

Kana couldn't stop smiling and kept pushing more food and extra helpings of rice at Die and then Kyo, going on about how badly they eat on tour.

Die finished up his stew and then took a few drinks of his coffee before tucking in on the rice as well. He glanced between the others, smiling a little, glad that Kyo was getting a better reception with his parents since he'd spoken with them. He sniffed slightly and then settled back, holding his slightly distended stomach from how fast he'd eaten and the amount, just listening to the conversation.

Before Kyo knew it, he was talking to his father about his vocals and struggles with them, something he'd never done before. He had always found his father unreceptive when it came to his life but now, the man was paying attention and even adding to it, comparing to his work and such.

Die's smile grew as the moments continued forward, watching as Kyo and his father interacted more than he'd ever seen happen before. He smirked slightly toward Kana and moved his head to indicate the pair of them.

Kana glanced over at Die then smirked a bit herself, shifting a bit on her cushion to lean forward, whispering behind her hand. "Those two haven't had such an in depth conversation in many years... and it's all thanks to you, I believe." 

She chuckled then pointed to the plants with a conspiratorial wink. "Come help me with the dishes, hm?" She picked up a hand full and quietly made her way to the kitchen. 

Kyo, oblivious to his mother's and Die's conversation, continued on chatting with his father, the subject changing from work to childhood stories.

Hiro was laughing heartily now, his face a bit red as he told Kyo a tale of how Kyo had run off one time as a toddler and they'd found him hiding in his grandmother's laundry basket.

Die pushed himself up and gathered up some plates and bowls, heading into the kitchen with her, feeling somehow proud of himself. Once they were in the kitchen, he paused beside Kana and put his hand lightly on her shoulder. "I thank you both for agreeing to let me bring Kyo out here. I just... with everything, I wanted him to have his family back, and I'm so happy it’s working."

Kana set her dishes down and turned to face Die, her eyes slightly watery. "I cannot express how good it is to see Tooru and Hiro actually talking and not yelling or arguing. You've changed my son so much and I am eternally grateful." She bit her lip then bowed to Die, a few tears splashing down her cheeks. "I believe... that you've saved him."

Die couldn't take the sight of tears down her face and he stepped in, pulling her into his embrace, holding her close to him as he patted her back lightly. After a moment's hesitation, he spoke, "He told me as much... and honestly, he's saved me in a few different ways."

Kana tensed up at the embrace, not expecting it, but after a moment she relaxed and hugged Die back, sniffling a little. It took her a minute to regain her composure and when she did, she pulled back and patted Die's shoulders, a smile working its way onto her face. "I'm so glad."

Die let her move back when she wanted to, offering her a soft smile and then moving to start washing up the dishes. "I just hope they get to a point where it's not a temporary fix...."

Kana walked to the sink and grabbed up a towel to dry the dishes as Die washed them. "Oh, I think they will this time... I can feel it!" She started humming an old song as they worked, her voice steady and in tune. 

Meanwhile, Kyo and Hiro had cleared the rest of the table by sweeping everything to one side and now were engaged in a spirited but friendly argument over which guitars of Die's were best. Kyo arguing that the D-DR 300 was best and his father going for the VP-SL7.

Die and Kana finished up the dishes in what amounted to record time. When he came back out, wiping his damp hands on his jeans, he stood behind the pair, smirking at their argument. He finally leaned in. "I think they're all amazing and I'd never choose sides with them." He winked.

Kyo nearly jumped out of his skin when Die spoke, his head whipping around so fast his neck nearly popped. He looked vaguely embarrassed to be caught talking about Die's guitars and ended up ducking his head, giving an awkward laugh. "Yes, well, that's because you treat them like babies and parents never choose a favorite child!" 

Hiro chuckled loudly and shook his head. "An artist always has many tools. One cannot choose a favorite, for they are all needed to complete the work."  
Die pointed at Hiro, making a little clicking noise and then, "Bingo." He kissed Kyo's cheek and then gestured outside. "I'm going to check the oil on the car and whatnot, okay?"

Kyo peered up at Die with a questioning look but nodded anyway before looking back at his father. "And when did you get so deep about art?!" 

Hiro grinned at Die then laughed. "Hey, I used to be quite handy with charcoal! Just ask your mother." 

Kana settled down next to Hiro and smiled. "He's right. He even attempted to sketch me one time... though it ended up looking more like your grandmother!" 

Hiro huffed indignantly. "I was trying to _shade_ it!" 

Kyo just laughed, smiling at his parents, feeling very happy right then.

Die wandered out to the car, checking all the fluids and then hoisting himself up on the hood to smoke his e-cigarette for a little while, just watching the world coast by, a smile on his lips. He had such big plans for Kyo and him whenever Kyo decided to leave. They could spend the night here or in a little inn he'd found, it was really up to Kyo. But the real surprise was for when they got back to Tokyo and he found himself utterly elated by it.

Kyo, realizing that Die had not returned after a while, finally decided it was time to go. He and his father actually hugged for the first time in years and his mother nearly burst into tears. After both he and Hiro consoled Kana, she insisted on packing up the leftovers of their stew as well as a bunch of homemade mochi and other treats. 

Kyo, burdened with a large stack of food containers, finally made his way out to the car, his parents following to say goodbye to Die. "Hey... ready to head out?"

Die looked at Kyo when the other came out, sliding off the hood and going to help him with the stacks of containers. "Mmm... if you are. This is your show, baby."

Kyo nodded a little, moving to set the containers in the car then turning to his parents. "Thank you, supper was delicious." He smiled and moved to hug his mother and shake his father's hand, figuring one hug was enough. 

Kana turned to Die and tugged him into her arms, squeezing harder than a woman her size should have been able to. "Thank you, Daisuke. Please continue looking after my son." 

Hiro settled for a hearty handshake, bowing slightly as he did. "I am grateful."

Die flushed at the hugs and open words of thanks he was getting from Kyo's parents, nodding a little. "Trust me, he'll always be on my list of people I'm looking after." He slid his e-cigarette into his pocket and then moved around the car to the driver's seat, slipping inside. "Thank you for the amazing meal and everything."

Kyo got into the car, waving to his parents. "See you soon." He buckled up then settled, smiling. 

Kana and Hiro waved a final goodbye and retreated into the house, both of them with damp eyes and much lighter hearts.

Die pulled out of the driveway not long after, smirking as he headed down the driveway and back toward the main streets in a more direct route. "So... that surprise you at all?"

Kyo glanced over at Die, laughing softly. "This whole thing has been surprising and I love it, baby."

Die struck out for Tokyo, though taking the long way. "Is there anything else you wanted while you're here, baby? Any stops or anything else?"  
Kyo looked around then bit his lip, looking at Die. "Actually... do you think we could stop at an onsen...?"

Die glanced at him and then smirked a little. "Any idea where the ones we're allowed to have tattoos are at around here?" He pulled onto a different street, heading towards the center of Kyoto, hoping that was a good route.

Kyo scratched his head for a moment. "Mmm, I think there are a couple up this way that allow them..." He smiled and reached over to caress Die's leg.

Die nodded, heading down the road, looking at all the signs as he passed, looking for the logos that would indicate that tattoos were okay. Finally, he found one that allowed it and pulled into the parking lot. He glanced at Kyo. "Just so we're clear... this is probably yakuza owned."

Kyo let out a laugh and shrugged. "Well, yeah… you're probably right but... it looks pretty decent." He grinned and got out of the car, grabbing his bag so he'd have clean clothes to change into.

Die nodded. "Just so long as we're clear." He stepped out of the car and went to the back, getting himself a change of clothing and stuffing it into a small bag. He added the shampoo and soap in as well, not trusting anything they'd have here, his brush going in on top.

He shut the door and headed around the car, locking it once Kyo was done getting his bag as well. "Okay, in we go."

Kyo followed along, carrying his bag, his eyes darting around the parking lot. It seemed rather empty and he wondered if they might could get a bath to themselves. "We should ask for a private bath."

"We'll see if they have one... though, honestly most of the ones that let those of us graced with ink in tend to be a one-bath deal." He gave Kyo a little laugh and then opened the door, slipping inside, fishing out his money as he scanned over the fees, letting Kyo do the talking on this one, not trusting his nerve enough.

Kyo calmly inquired about a private bath and learned that while they don't have exclusively private baths, they are partitioned and that the day was not busy so there would likely be an empty one. The lady at the counter gave them both a knowing look as they paid. She pointed them in the direction of the baths, reminding them to please wash first. 

Kyo thanked her quietly then headed off, humming softly, already able to feel the steam from the hot springs.

Die followed after Kyo once he had paid, actually sort of looking forward to being so traditional. He headed into the locker areas and quickly undressed, leaving everything in a locker, taking the key from it and putting it around his wrist. He carried his tiny bag of soap and shampoo, a towel around his waist and a smaller one over his arm.

Upon arriving into the bathing area, he picked the cleanest stool he could see, settling down on it and turning on the taps on low. He took his waist towel off and placed the small one over his lap for privacy. Glancing around, he found there was only one other person in the bath area and he was utterly ignoring them.

He took the little plastic bowl and began to slosh water over himself so he could lather up real well with the soap, doing just that after a few moments, watching the water and suds slide down the drain in front of him. Some things were just so damn tempting.

Kyo mimicked Die's actions, settling his stuff in a locker then going about stripping out of his clothes, folding them in a neat pile then taking up a stool next to Die. He was less shy about being nude, especially since the other guy was drying off by then, completely oblivious to their presence. 

He borrowed Die's soap and cleansed himself well with it then rinsed off, sighing as he did so, finding even this part relaxing. He looked up to see how Die was faring and saw a certain look in his eye, smirking a bit. He leaned over and murmured quietly. "Go ahead..."

Die had moved on to pouring water over his body, washing away the suds from how well he'd cleaned himself off, almost meticulous about it. He let out a little hum when Kyo leaned over to speak to him, tilting his head slightly. It was so odd how Kyo picked up on some things from him no matter what. But then again, he'd always sort of been an open book, so maybe he tended to give something away when he was thinking about being dirty.

He glanced back as the other man lingered for a moment, drying his hair, his whole torso in plain view. Die looked away, a bit ruffled by the fact that he'd just seen a stranger's cock without meaning to. He picked up the bowl again, and filled it with water. Being as discreet as he could be, he slid his hand under his little towel and then pushed it back so the tip of his dick was sticking out. He was already half hard from the thought of what he wanted to do.

The guy was still moving around behind them and Die focused on the drain in front of himself, aiming, and then letting loose, a steady stream of piss slipping down the drain in front of him.

Kyo shifted closer to Die, making a show of rinsing himself off well as he watched his lover perform his dirty deed. Something about Die doing this in a basically public setting had him shifting on his stool a bit, his cock betraying him.

One of Die's fingers slipped up into his stream a few times, causing it to spray out in every direction for a moment. By the time he was done, the other man had headed into the onsen, and Die was hard as a rock. For a moment, he blatantly jacked off, hips pushing up into his hand, unable to help the arousal that flooded him.

But after a moment, he let his cock go and poured the water over himself and everything he'd gotten with his piss. Then he dumped a bowl of it over his head, picking up his shampoo and pouring some in his palm, starting to work it into his hair, not saying a word.

Kyo bit his lip hard as he watched Die, his own dick fully hard by now. He shifted back when Die was finished and picked up the shampoo, lathering up his hair, flexing his hips up every now and then.

Die glanced at Kyo's cock, definitely enjoying the sight of his lover all riled up and not doing a thing about it. His own cock was tenting his towel quite prominently and he had to smirk about it, flexing it to watch the towel bob. Once he was done rinsing his hair out, he glanced at Kyo and in a low, sensual voice, he murmured, "Dare me to walk into the onsen like this? Regardless of who's in there?"

Kyo was letting the spray from the handheld shower rinse the suds from his hair when Die spoke. He smirked and glanced over at his tented out towel, licking his lips a little. "Absolutely..." He stood up and grabbed his own towel, looping it around his waist, his hard dick tenting out the front rather obviously, a soft groan leaving his lips as it brushed against the towel.

Die stood up, squeezing out his hair and putting all his stuff into his bag, hanging it over the loop to come pick up in a few minutes. He left his towel there as well, walking right for the springs, his dick definitely leading the way. Nerves slid through his body and he shivered a little as he stepped in, three other men in the springs already. Two were in one area, one on the other side of the partition. All of them glanced up when he came in and one of them smirked a little, looking away after a moment, obviously having noticed his hard dick.

He paused, debating the direction in which they should go.

Kyo followed Die, his own dick bobbing against his stomach as he walked. When Die stopped, he peered around him and noticed the other men. He waged a quick, inner battle with himself then headed for the one with the single man in it, nodding his head as he stepped over and sat on the edge, easing his way into the pool of hot water.

Die followed suit, coming over and placing his towel on the side, stepping in, cock still in full display. He shuddered as the water slid up over him, warm and inviting. He moved to sit across from Kyo, sitting back, the water really not hiding much from the guy's sight.

The other male eyed them with interest and then finally offered, "Pretend I'm not here."

Kyo glanced up and snorted lightly as he settled against the wall, the warm water not helping his aching hard on. "Little hard to do..."

Die shot the guy a look and then Kyo, chuckling softly as he leaned back. Some part of him was thriving off this, though some other part was scared to death. What exactly did this guy want?

He shifted a little and then slid one hand over his chest before settling down again, just pretending like nothing was going on right then, aside from the smirk on his face.

Kyo cleared his throat, feeling a little less brave all of a sudden. He hadn't expected the guy to say anything, much less blatantly look at them. He couldn't help shifting a bit, arousal still heavy in the pit of his stomach.

Die noticed Kyo's immediate change in demeanor and he knew things had edged into non-sexy territory suddenly. Honestly, he didn't really know what to do, other than chance asking the guy to leave or something equally as brave, though potentially stupid.

Instead, he sat there, just letting the hot water soak them, glancing over at the other guy from the corner of his eyes. He was obviously aroused, his dick hard as well, and Die found himself both proud and completely embarrassed. He shifted a little, crossing his legs in an attempt to hide his own arousal a little bit so the guy didn't have so much so stare at and would maybe leave them be.

Kyo sat there, his arousal only slightly abating but still there, something about the guy watching them getting to him. He finally decided to be bold and moved over to where Die was, his hands going to grasp Die's shoulders as he half stood, half floated between his legs. He turned to look at the other man, smirking a little. "It’s my birthday, you see... and he brought me here as a gift..."

Die watched Kyo get up, a little bit confused by the other's change of pace. He sniffed slightly and uncrossed his legs, letting Kyo get between them. As low as he could manage, he whispered, "Do you want to fuck me?"

The man smirked at Kyo's comment, nodding a little. "A nice gift, hard to find places that allow tattoos these days." His eyes flicked between the pair of them. "Was that an invitation for me to take my leave or... do you care if I remain?"

Kyo shivered at Die's question, biting his tongue to catch a moan. Leaning in closer, he murmured, "I want to ride you..."

He turned back to the guy, running his eyes over the tattoos covering his skin, obviously Yakuza related. "True." He pursed his lips slightly then gave a shrug. "Do what you want..."

Die stared at Kyo for a long moment, barely giving him time to answer the guy before he tugged him close. "Straddle me," he murmured, sliding his hands along the other's hips and lower abdomen, finally down over the little vein he loved so much by his hip and then down his strong thighs.

Kyo groaned softly and moved to straddle Die's lap, his cock brushing against his lover's a couple of times, pulling a moan from his lips. "God..."

Die grabbed hold of his ass, hauling him close, pressing Kyo's cock against his belly. He smirked a little as he took note that the yakuza guy was trying to be discreet about fondling himself. He licked his lips as he slid his hand down under Kyo's balls, slipping one finger up into his body with a quiet groan.

Kyo held on to Die's shoulders as he pulled him close, his cock brushing against Die's stomach causing it to twitch. He shifted around and spread his legs some, giving Die better access, thankful the warm water had him relaxed enough that it would only burn slightly when Die actually entered him. 

Leaning forward to press his lips against Die's ear, nipping the lobe lightly before murmuring. "He's watching us, baby..."

Die let out a little half affirmative, half moan sound as he plunged his finger in a few more times. Something about fingering Kyo like this was blatantly erotic... and the fact that he was taking Kyo in front of someone as powerful as a possible yakuza member had his hormones raging inside and his pride sky-high.

Kyo couldn't help letting out a lewd moan as Die fingered him, his body pushing down on the digit, wanting it deeper. He slid his hands down over Die's chest, quietly speaking in a near pleading tone. "Ah, more... finger my ass, baby…"

Die let out a half growl, pulling out the single finger and pushing back in two, enjoying the way Kyo asked him for it like this. He licked his lips a little and let out a grunt as he thrust up particularly hard with his fingers.

Kyo bit his lip hard to keep from outright crying out as Die's fingers pushed deep inside him, stretching him and just barely brushing his prostate. "Oh, fuck yes, that's it... stretch my asshole for your cock," he groaned lowly, the words as lewd as their actions.

Die chuckled a little and then licked his lips as he pulled his fingers free. He held the base of his cock and nudged Kyo over his cock. "Then fucking sit on it."

Kyo groaned and shifted a bit, moving his hands to grip the rocky edge of the bath before lowering his body onto Die's cock, hissing at the faint burn. 

"Oh... oh... fuck yes..."

Die let out a hiss at the way Kyo slid onto his cock. "Oh, yeah, baby..." he immediately grabbed his hips and started to fuck him, not being gentle or slow about it.

The other man lifted himself out of the water, sitting on the edge, blatantly jacking off while he watched them fuck, obviously enjoying it.

Kyo groaned, tilting his head back slightly and glancing towards the Yakuza, surveying their surveyor. He wasn't unattractive, still young and muscular, tattoos not yet covering everything. 

He smirked at his observation, eyes landing and pausing on the guy's cock, watching the way he jerked it in time with Die's thrusts.

Die smirked a little as he saw Kyo staring at the other man. "You fucking like his cock, baby? Do you like looking at it?" He shifted down and bit at his neck a little, then the juncture of shoulder and neck, sucking a little.

Kyo whined softly, his hand going to tangle in Die's hair, his hips rolling slightly. "Nng... yeah... he's getting off to you fucking me..." He looked back over at the guy for a moment then focused on Die, moaning lowly. "Ah baby... yeah... fucking mark me as yours..."

Die let out a faint groan, starting to fuck him faster and faster, whimpering as he plunged into the other's body, again and again. "Love you more than anything," he hissed out into Kyo's ear. "So fucking hot... oh shit, baby... touch your dick."

Kyo shuddered at Die's words, shifting and bouncing on his cock. "Ah Gods... love you..." He reached down and wrapped his hand around his cock, moaning a little loudly as it twitched in his hand. He couldn't hold back anymore and started jerking himself off furiously, his breath coming in harsh pants. "Oh... fuck... mnng... yes"

Die let out a loud groan, watching Kyo jack off in his lap, truly enjoying the whole thing far more than he probably should have. He plunged in a few more times and finally glanced at the yakuza, watching as he pushed his hips up and started to spurt cum all over himself. With a growl, Die snagged Kyo's hips hard, thrusting up so hard his legs were shaking from the exertion, finally letting out a cry as he came hard, spilling inside Kyo.

Kyo's head snapped back as Die's hips slammed against his own, his lover's cock buried deep within his body, filling him to the brim. He held on to Die with one tightly, the other stroking his cock a few more time before he let out keening moan and came, spurting between them and onto Die's chest.

Die watched Kyo paint his chest, moaning softly as he pushed into him one more time. He sniffed slightly and then glanced over at the other man who was looking slightly embarrassed as he got out of the water and wrapped a towel around himself. He knelt next to them for a moment. "Happy birthday... and... this will remain with me alone."

Kyo slumped against Die, shivering in the after effects of his orgasm, a blissful feeling over taking him. He didn't even care that the other man came and spoke to them, laughing softly. "Thanks..."

The yakuza tipped his head a little and then pushed himself up, moving off.

Die pulled the other closer, pushing his hand into Kyo's hair and holding him tight. "Gods..." he whispered against his neck.

Kyo moaned softly, slipping his arms around Die's waist. "Nnhg... baby...."

Die sniffed a little and then chuckled softly. "So... how's that for a really sweet double present?" he asked quietly.

Kyo snorted against Die's neck where his head was currently buried. "I think that was a great _fucking_ present!" He looked around and noticed they were finally alone, no sounds coming from the other side of the partition. "Hnn, any other place would've kicked us out."

Die laughed, tilting his head back. "Not when a member of their... establishment... was enjoying it so very much." He shook his head and murmured softly. "If you'd told me a year ago I'd be fucking you in a bath-house, I'd have told you you were nuts."

Kyo shifted off of Die's lap with a groan, pushing the water around a bit then sinking into up to his shoulders with a sigh, a chuckle escaping him. "I'd have to agree but... to be honest... I can't say I would have completely been against the idea."

Die smirked up at the ceiling before closing his eyes. "Dude... I love that you enjoy semi-public sex... I really do."

Kyo grinned, half-swimming over to the edge again and leaning against it, closing his eyes as he let his body sort of float freely. "Mm, yeah... it's erotic and dirty as fuck... I have to admit though, that's the first time I've ever had a stranger blatantly watching..."

Die made a little sound and then smirked. "First time for a stranger for me, too. But people I know... that's happened a lot, even in the past. I have to admit, it was more of a thrill this way, though dangerous as shit."

Kyo hummed softly, a yawn forcing its way out. "I agree but the thrill was worth it." He moved to press his lips to Die's cheek, smiling. "Thank you, again, for an amazing birthday."

Die let out another laugh. "You know... I think it's hilarious how we're probably the only relationship in the world that an amazing birthday gift is having sex with someone watching." He glanced at him. "I adore you, I hope you know that."

Kyo laughed loudly at that, shaking his head. "I think you're probably right but to be fair, I was referring to the trip as well." He grinned then shifted into a standing position, reaching out to run his hand over Die's arm. "I do know that. You remind me every day..."

Die slid out of the water as well, stretching, his back popping a few times. He yawned and then leaned in, snagging Kyo into a hug and kissing him hard before he pulled back. "Ready? Or do you want to move to the super-hot one for a few minutes?"

Kyo accepted the kiss, returning it then shrugging a little. "Ahh, we can go. My fingers have gotten all gross and I hate that." He held them up, laughing a little.

"Prunes!" Die slid out of the water, going to get his towel. "I think... I need to give this place a little uh... extra... to take care of the mess we just made." He shrugged a little. "Now to just figure out how to phrase it." He headed back to the bath area, turning it on hot and spraying himself down and then picking up his bag and towel and everything and heading back toward the locker area.

Kyo chuckled. "Just say it's a tip for, uh, discretion. They'll get it... I think." He followed Die's example, going about rinsing himself then toweling dry before heading to the lockers to get his clothing. 

He went about dressing himself, feeling utterly relaxed and content at the moment. "In a way, I wish we could just stay here, in Kyoto."

Die made a little sound. "Yeah... but all the things we'd be giving up, just think of it." He shook his head. "After Dir en grey's over... maybe then." Reaching to ruffle the other's hair, he smirked at him.

Kyo blinked a little and shook his head. "Yeah... but retiring here would be nice... maybe." He smiled, images of him and Die as elderly men, puttering around the temples of Kyoto flitting through his mind. 

"That's a far off future though, as far as I'm concerned..." He finished dressing then finger combed his hair a bit. "Anyway, I'm ready if you are, baby."

Die got dressed in record time, finishing up with putting on some deodorant and cologne. He pulled Kyo close and sprayed a little bit of his cologne on his wrist before kissing him soundly on the lips. "Just so you smell like me all day and all night... my own little claim," he whispered out against his lips before letting him go and walking calmly out toward the front.

He stopped at the desk and handed the woman a few folded bills. She smirked at him a little and he cleared his throat. "For your discretion, we thank you kindly for it."

Kyo blinked as Die sprayed him with cologne, snorting. "You just marked me like a cat..." He grinned and kissed Die back then gathered up his bag and followed him to the front, his cheeks heating a little at the look on the woman's face. He just simply bowed and darted outside in front of Die, heading to the car.

Die followed behind Kyo, a smug look on his face. He slipped into the car and held his hand out to Kyo, something hidden in the palm. "Our kindly yakuza left something for you with the desk lady, but you ran off too fast."

Kyo looked over at Die and reached out his hand, taking whatever it was he was holding. It was a silver necklace with a small pendant on it. Blinking, Kyo studied it for a moment then swallowed. "Ah... it's uhm... Saint Cecilia... patron saint to singers... I think he knew..."

Die gave him a little smirk. "Not many people that don't, baby." He started the car. "She said he wished you a happy birthday and that his promise would be kept."

Kyo quietly slipped the necklace over his head, settling it with the others he was wearing under his shirt. He huffed and looked vaguely embarrassed. "I see... first time I've gotten a gift from a yakuza... hopefully the last."

He nudged the other a little and then pulled back out of the parking spot, heading out onto the street. "Well... just sayin'... it could come in handy in the future. I have a feeling he might be keeping an eye on us, might help to have someone more... affective... than the law on our side."

Kyo cocked his head, considering that. "True... they would probably make better bodyguards, at least." He sniffed and leaned back, stretching in his seat a bit. "So, back home then?"

Die nodded. "Back home." He checked his watch and then struck out toward the road to Tokyo, looking very pleased with himself. "I think it's awesome you got a gift from a yakuza. That's... an accomplishment."

Kyo fingered the pendant slightly, shaking his head. "It's definitely up there on the list of things I never thought I'd get..." He turned to look at Die's profile for a moment then smiled softly. "A list that used to include you..."

Die grinned, his eyes completely on the road though. "Yeah... god I love this life. It's so much better than the years before this."

Kyo reached over and laid his hand on Die's thigh, squeezing a little as he softly murmured, "Me, too." He would forever thank the Gods that allowed him and Die to be together even when he felt he didn't deserve so much happiness.

The next few hours were relatively uneventful, Die taking it easy on the gas, not going too quickly from Kyoto back to Tokyo. By the time they hit Tokyo city limits, Kyo was fast asleep in the passenger seat, Die having turned the heater on and some soothing music, his energy drinks keeping him far more awake than was necessary while it enabled his lover to fall asleep just as planned.

He bypassed their apartment, driving closer to their studio and entering a little neighborhood filled with townhouses. He pulled up into the driveway of a lovely grey two-story, a small pond in the front, a tiny zen garden off to the right of it, and a cherry tree hanging over the pond. 

Cutting the engine, Die carefully got out of the car and came around, making sure not to wake Kyo before he had his door opened. He took a deep breath and knelt down, holding out a small silver box. "Kyo... wake up," he murmured softly.

Kyo had indeed fallen into a relaxing sleep on the way back and did not notice they had stopped until Die's voice filtered into his ears. He opened his eyes, squinting down at his lover and then the box, raising an eyebrow. "Baby, I'm touched... but we already went through the proposal..." 

He smiled a little, reaching out to tug a strand of Die's hair, not yet looking around. Die laughed a little. "I know it's strange... but... just open it. It's not a ring. Just humor me."

Kyo laughed softly then took the box, opening it up and looking at the contents, a single key. "Die..." He finally looked up and around them, seeing the beautiful townhouse. "Did you...oh..." He looked down at the key again then back to Die, looking decidedly emotional. "You bought... it?"

Die flushed a bit and nodded. "Please... I really hope I did the right thing. I mean... both of our names are on it, the paperwork is still sort of in limbo because it needs your signature, but I told them why I was doing this and they agreed to wait on the paperwork and still... let me do what I wanted." He coughed a little. "Could be that I paid in cash." He reached to take Kyo's hand. 

"I want you to be clear on this... I want this to be ours, not mine. So... you can either take your half as a gift or... you know..." he shrugged, not wanting to say pay him back.

Kyo had to swallow a few times before he could remotely answer. He squeezed Die's hand hard and looked at the house again, moving to get out of the car. "Our's… a house of _our_ own.." He would worry about the logistics of payment and such later but right now, he wanted to see the inside of _their_ home. "Can we go inside or...?" His face was split into a grin by now, his hand still holding tightly to Die's.

Die smiled and stepped back to let Kyo out of the car. He shut the door behind him and locked the car up. "I can one-up you on that one, baby." He grinned, going to the door and gesturing. "Open your present, baby."

Kyo laughed and took the key, moving to the front door, his hand shaking the slightest bit as he unlocked it and pushed it open, stepping inside the entry. He quickly rid himself of his shoes and moved further inside, a low gasp falling from his lips as he realized that the living room was set up with their furniture and belongings. "Oh... Die...." He stepped into it and looked around, biting his lip. Everything looked damn near perfect sitting there, right down to the feng-shui flowing through it.

Die smiled as he moved in after Kyo, tossing his shoes to the side as well, and then closing the door. He stepped into the living room with Kyo, impressed himself in how everything was set up. Apparently the moving team and the decorators had done an amazing job while they had been in Kyoto. He stepped over to the bar and smiled as he plucked up a card out of a bowl of fruit. It had Kyo's name on it and he waved it at him. "Card for you."

Kyo moved over and examined the fine granite of the bar, smoothing his hand over it before taking the card from Die and reading it aloud. "Niimura-san, congratulations on your new home. We have taken the liberty to include a few gifts of our own in the decorating process. Please enjoy, best wishes." He smiled and made a note to pay attention and look for these gifts as he moved into the kitchen. Their appliances had been replaced with all matching, black, red and stainless steel ones that matched the backsplash and trim.

Die padded after him, arching an eyebrow at the quality of appliances in the kitchen. "Well... um... wow." He chuckled. "Guess that was well worth the decorator money, then. Sort of paid for itself with the new stuff in here."

Kyo ran his hand over the new rice cooker, noting it was a larger capacity than the one they'd had. "I hope they didn't just toss the old ones though. We should make sure they were donated or something..." He moved to the cabinets, peeking inside and finding that their dishes had been stacked neatly by size as well as their cups, mugs and other random things. Everything had been put away in perfect order and there was a new set of square, white dishes with silver trim. "This is... amazing... and we're only in the kitchen!"

Die beamed at Kyo. "And it's like moving in without the effort of unpacking shit and trying to figure out where to put it at. I thought that was well worth the money." He placed his hand on Kyo's back and reached for the dishes. "Oooo, I like these!"

Kyo nodded in agreement though he winced at the mention of money again, mentally reminding himself to put a good chunk of his savings into Die's account. "They're really nice... looks like they included matching cups and saucers as well." He pointed to them then moved away, looking around some more, wandering to a door off the living room and opening it up to find a half bath.

Die noticed the wince and ducked his head, making a note to not say anything about the money again, though it had cost him his entire savings and he was down to enough to live off until the next payday came in. He padded behind Kyo, peering in to see what they'd done with the bathroom. It still had the little glassed off shower with the rainfall faucets and a black shell sink and black toilet.

Kyo slipped inside and turned on the faucet, watching the water splash around the shell shape of the sink. He shut it off and looked up at Die, moving to hug him briefly before slipping by him and going to look at the dining room. The table had been set up with place settings and an intriguing blue glass centerpiece. Die chuckled as Kyo started to run water into the sink. He hugged him in return and licked his lips as he moved off toward the dining area, pausing by the stairs, watching Kyo. Off to the right of the stairs were several framed portraits of Kyo and Die and then the whole band and their families. He smiled softly at them. "Look," he murmured, gesturing at the little cluster of pictures.

Kyo moved back to the stairs and looked at the framed photographs, feeling his throat tighten up as he gazed at them, memories of when and where they were taken as well as seeing them displayed like that bringing on a strong emotional reaction. "Wow..."

Die smiled at the other and gently took his hand, leading him up the stairs and into an area that appeared to half be a home for their equipment and half for an entire home-studio set-up. Die grinned, going over to see his guitars, kneeling down to make sure they were alright.

Kyo's eyes lit up at the sight of the studio-esque set up, moving to examine his own equipment and taking a moment envision the space as one that he and Die could comfortably collaborate their talents in. A large, comfortable black sofa was situated against one wall, a coffee table in front of it. On the wall behind the sofa and the one opposite, prints of their album covers, framed poster style, hung in varying patterns.

Die stood up, his hands in his pockets as he stared around the area. "It's a really nice touch that they gave us framed prints of our album covers... I like it. I feel so much more professional." He laughed and shook his head. "Funny I say this after so many years now, right?"

Kyo laughed, nodding his head. "Right... I never feel 'professional' about it... even when I'm surrounded by studio equipment and am in the recording booth." He wandered on after another moment of looking, peeking out onto the balcony to see a small table with two chairs setup as well as a long, padded bench. 

Turning back to look around some more, he stopped suddenly and looked at Die in slight horror. "Uhm, Die... where are our kittens?"  
Die scratched his head. "Er... somewhere? Not sure. Knowing them though, probably the bedroom." He shrugged a little. "Or terrified and hiding given that strangers moved them." He headed toward what he knew to be the master bedroom, pushing the half-open door the rest of the way open. He beamed at what he found, their bed draped in a brand new comforter with a red guitar and a microphone printed on it. And right on top of it, their kittens. "They're in here, baby. Come look."

Kyo looked briefly worried until Die said they were in the bedroom and he moved to peer inside, smiling at their babies, curled up together on top of their new comforter. "Good... and nice touch there. They went all out, didn't they?" He wandered further into the room, finding it to be quite spacious, definitely bigger than before. Surprisingly though, their bedroom set up fit just fine in it, along with what appeared to be a reading corner set up near the windows. He peeked into the large closet, finding their clothing hanging on opposite sides as well as shoes, boots, belts, ties, and other accessories in categorized bins and racks.

Die settled on the bed, tugging the kittens closer and stroking over their soft fur. "Hey, sweeties... you comfy now?" He leaned down to nuzzle them and smirked a little when he realized what he was doing and how he looked. "So... just the guest bedroom and main bath to look over... what do you think so far?" He could only pray it was a good reaction.

Kyo turned and moved over to give each kitten a rub then stroked his hand over Die's hair, smiling softly. "Baby, it's perfect. The location, the setup... it's... _our's_."

Die smiled softly. "I'm really glad you like it. I was sort of worried about doing it without your approval, but... it's the one we had talked about and I sincerely wanted to do this for today." He smiled softly, reaching to cup Kyo's face.

Kyo leaned into Die's touch, turning his head to press his lips to his lover's palm. "Well, I have to admit that I'm glad we talked about this beforehand..." He gave Die's palm another peck then moved away, anxious to see the rest of the house, especially the bathroom.

Die nodded a little, biting at his lower lip and swallowing slightly. He sniffed and ran his hand over Kyo's before he got up to move to the bathroom. He followed behind him, leaving the kittens on the bed. He leaned on the bathroom doorframe and smiled as Kyo wandered around inside. "I got us a proper tub, baby... big enough for both of us."

Kyo stepped into the bathroom and looked around, brushing his hand over the counter. He looked at the huge bathtub and snorted. "Are you kidding me? That's big enough for us to have the entire band in it." He saw their shampoo and soap bottles had been replaced with permanent, built in pumps along the wall, finding the look very nice as it kept clutter to a minimum.

Die let out a laugh. "Okay, so I went overboard, but... hey... it happens." He smirked. "Truth is, the price was the same for any size with the house, so... I went for bigger is better."

Kyo chuckled. "Makes sense to me." He peered into the linen closet, finding their towels and a few other bathroom-esque things like toilet paper, the plunger, etc. in there. "I really am loving the fact that I don't have to fucking decide where to put all this crap..."

Die nodded a little and smirked at the other. "Yeah... I'm really glad I don't have to unpack, trust me." He gestured around. "Can you imagine two floors and trying to figure it all out?"

Kyo groaned at the thought, shaking his head. "No. It took me at least 3 months to figure out how to set up my first, one room place back in the day."

Die chuckled. "Worse than me, then." He stepped over to the toilet, looking mildly embarrassed. "Seriously drank too much on the road." He gestured to the room Kyo still hadn't viewed. "Still the guest bedroom to go."

Kyo peered over at the toilet then at Die, smirking slightly. "You can be the one to break it in..." He grinned then moved on to the guest bedroom, opening the door and going inside. It was smaller than their bedroom but was still comfortable. A queen sized bed, two side tables, a dresser and a flat screen television set up on a stand were all arranged neatly in the room and it had its own closet where some of their extra blankets and sheets had been stored. "Very nice... our parents would be comfortable staying here... though yours live close enough..."

Die moved open the toilet lid and unzipped his jeans. Taking himself in hand, he began to relieve himself with a soft sigh, pleased by that. He licked his lips a little as he finished up and went to flush, shaking off, and tucking himself back in. He washed his hands and then headed off to the guest bedroom. "Yeah, I asked them to make it more... guest-y." He laughed softly.

Kyo laughed and nodded, reaching out to run his hand over the soft beige bedspread. "These people knew exactly what they were doing and the place looks wonderful. It _is_ wonderful."

"Good. So... did I do well or did I jump the gun?" Die pursed his lips a little.  
Kyo moved to slip his arms around Die, pecking him on the lips. "You did wonderful and I don't think I could ever thank you enough..."

Die looked relieved at that moment, grinning at Kyo. "Well... happy birthday, my love."


	32. Chapter 32

A taxi pulled up to Kyo and Die's home late one afternoon and the vocalist exited with a suitcase and duffel bag. He paid the driver then trudged up the walk and up the stairs, letting himself in the door. Leaving his luggage in the entryway, he slipped out of his shoes and wandered to the living room, flopping down on the couch with a tired sigh, looking around bleary eyed.

It had been a week since he'd left to assist Gara with producing Merry's latest work and he was very anxious to see his lover. He knew Die was at the recording studio right then and, tempting as it had been to show up there instead, he knew his lover was busy and Kaoru wouldn't appreciate the distraction. 

Instead, he had chosen to go home and now he was sitting in his steadily darkening living room, half-dozing on the couch. He picked up his phone and shot off a text to Die letting him know he was home then pushed himself off the couch to take a much needed shower.

After his shower, he dressed in a pair of Die's red sweatpants, not caring that they were way too long and hanging off of him. He didn't bother with a shirt and simply returned to the living room to idly flip channels until Die got home.

Die didn't end up getting Kyo's text until he was done for the day, having been inside the recording booth for most of the time, and never having heard the message.

When Die finally checked his phone, it was after he was on the subway, headed home. He decided not to bother responding and show up with dinner just to surprise Kyo.

He stopped by a little pizza place on the way and got them a couple of personal pan pizzas. By the time he arrived home, he was just sincerely excited to see Kyo again after their time apart.

Slipping in the door, he grinned happily as he kicked off his shoes. "Kyo?!"

Kyo had nearly dozed off again by the time Die got home but as soon as the door shut and Die called out, he was awake and on his feet, moving to the entry hall with a grin. "Hey."

Die moved into the living room, putting the pizzas down on the table and reaching for Kyo. "Come here, baby."

Kyo was in Die's arms in an instant, slipping his own around the other's waist and hugging him tightly, inhaling his lover's scent. "Hnn... missed you..."

Die grabbed Kyo's ass, pulling him up and tight against himself. He dipped his head down and kissed him gently. The moment he released the other's lips, he grinned at him. "Missed you so much, baby. I'm glad you're back."

Kyo let out a soft sound as Die grabbed him, his arms shifting to wrap around Die's neck instead as he happily kissed him back. "Me, too. I was beginning to think they weren't going to let me leave." He snorted then leaned in for another kiss, his hand sliding up through Die's hair.

Die chuckled softly, plunking down on the couch, Kyo in his lap. "Hnn... you're adorable, by the way... in my pants." He smirked a little and grabbed Kyo's ass a little.

After a moment, he pecked Kyo's lips and then patted him a little. "I brought pizza for us. You hungry, baby?"

Kyo settled in Die's lap and smirked, wiggling his ass a bit. "They're comfortable... and yes, I'm starving. I didn't have time to grab anything at the train station." He turned and peered at the boxes of pizza, his stomach growling a bit. "I don't wanna move though."

Die chuckled, moving the other slightly so he could grab the pizza boxes and put them on the couch next to him.

He shifted slightly and opened the lid to Kyo's, holding it out to him and smirking. "Here. Your favorite."

Kyo chuckled as Die handed him his pizza, looking it over. "Mmm, chicken and spinach... yummy. Thanks, babe." He grabbed a slice and bit into it, moaning softly.

Die opened his own box as well and grabbed a slice of his pizza, chowing down on it, one hand still firmly planted on Kyo's ass. Every once in a while, he squeezed the handful of behind he had, grinning each and every time he did.  
Kyo nibbled his pizza happily, letting out little squeaks when Die's hand closed around his ass. He would glance up at the other and shake his head, grinning around his food. 

When he'd eaten three slices of his pizza, he set the box aside and leaned in to peck Die's cheek. "You're awesome."

Die polished his off very quickly. He licked his lips a little then put the box on the table, leaning back again and just framing Kyo's face with his hands, smiling happily up at the other. "Just so happy to have you back."

Kyo smiled up at his lover, reaching up to cover his hands with his own. "I'm happy to be back. I missed you..." He bit his lip, his eyes darkening slightly. "...in more ways than one."

Die slid his hands up the other's back, lightly scratching them back down, his eyes filled with emotion. "I can definitely relate to you there," he murmured softly.

Kyo let out a sound then leaned in, pressing his lips to Die's, his kiss holding a sense of desperation. He moved his hands to push into Die's hair, tangling it, mussing it up as he pulled him close and held him there.

Die licked at Kyo's lips a little bit and then let out a soft moan, rolling Kyo over so that he was hovering over him on the couch. He reached down to start opening his own pants. "God I've missed you," he whispered softly.

Kyo shifted and adjusted as Die moved him, groaning lowly when the other went for his pants, watching him with lust burning in his eyes. "Obviously..." He smirked then reached down, brushing his hand over Die's crotch.

Die let out a soft sound at Kyo's touch, leaning up to claim his lips with his own once again. He pushed his jeans out of the way and then reached for Kyo's sweat pants, yanking them down in the front, almost instantly melding his body against Kyo's own, letting out a throaty moan as he did so.  
Kyo moaned into the kiss then let out an almost pained cry, grasping Die's shoulders tightly as his hips rolled up at the contact then pulled away a bit, giving Die a semi-apologetic look.

Die pulled back the moment Kyo let out a sound that wasn't even remotely pleased. His eyes were wide, his heart racing in a single moment's notice. "Did I... what? Are you okay?"

Kyo let out a breathless laugh, squirming to sit up. "Ahh... I'm fine... I just... it was unexpected." He looked faintly embarrassed then moved to tug his boxers down and out of the way, revealing his half hard cock with a still healing apadravya piercing.

Die stared down at Kyo's cock, his mouth slightly agape. He let out a soft whine and then kissed Kyo hard. "Shit I let you out of my sight for no time at all and you go pierce your dick." He let out a little half-moaning laugh, guiding Kyo's hand to his cock. "God, baby... I don't have the patience for lube right now." He let out a soft sound and bucked into the vocalist's hand. "Do it quick and I'll take you the second time," he whispered out, kissing him gently this go around.

Kyo laughed lowly then shifted, kissing Die hard and giving him a few strokes before laying back, gazing up at his lover. "C'mere, straddle my chest. I want to suck you."

Die let out a quiet groan at the idea of Kyo sucking him like that. "Are you sure?" he breathed out, his hips bucking against Kyo's thigh. "I'm not sure I'll be the most gentle person right now."

Kyo reached down and gave Die another squeeze. "Mnn... yes, I'm sure... now come here!"

Die let out a soft groan and shoved himself up from the couch. He pushed his pants down, leaving them on the floor, and then shifted back over Kyo, straddling Kyo's chest. For a moment, he just sat there, stroking his cock and staring down at Kyo as he chewed his lower lip.

He shivered a little and then reached over Kyo's head, grasping the arm of the couch and slowly slid himself forward, his cock pressing over Kyo's lips, sliding across them and up his cheek. Die let out a gasp, starting up a steady motion, pushing his cock over Kyo's mouth again and again, knowing this way he wouldn't choke him with his exuberance.

Kyo watched Die's actions, groaning softly when he straddled his chest. He slid his hands up Die's thighs as he gazed up at him, licking his lips. He couldn't help but reach up to grab Die's hips when his lover began sliding his cock over his lips. He flicked his tongue out, slicking the length of it, moaning softly. "Die..."

Die let out a loud moan, throwing back his head as he continued to move. It felt so utterly amazing and he knew right then that he couldn't hold back for very long. "Kyo..." he gasped out, one hand sliding down into his hair. "Baby... suck it." He pressed the tip against Kyo's lips, his excitement ramping up quickly.

Kyo eagerly parted his lips, taking Die's cock between them, flicking his tongue over the head. He slid his hand up to claw lightly at Die's chest as he moaned, practically begging Die to cum in his mouth with his eyes.

Die started to lightly thrust his hips, pushing his cock in and out of the other's mouth. It felt like delicious, sinful heaven. He let out a soft whine as he pushed in as much as he dared and began little tiny, quick thrusts into his mouth. "Kyo..." he breathed out, "I'm gonna cum."

Kyo bobbed his head slightly, taking more of Die's cock into his mouth, flicking his tongue along the underside of the head. Die's excitement ramped up his own, his hips rolling up as he sought friction to his aching cock. 

Die's words had him moaning and he dropped his head back, opening his mouth, swiping his tongue over the tip of Die's length.

Die shifted to get a slightly better angel on the whole thing. Once he was sure he wasn't choking Kyo and he wasn't going to ram himself into teeth or anything equally as horrible, he began to thrust more fully.

"Fuck, Kyo!" he cried out, thrusting faster and faster. After a few more thrusts, his entire body stiffened, his eyelids fluttering closed as he came, his length pulsing in Kyo's mouth.

Kyo held onto Die's hips as he thrust into his mouth, moans sliding past his cock. He opened his eyes to look up at his lover as he called his name and cum began to fill his mouth. He moaned, swallowing all Die had to offer then leaned back and lapped at the tip, gather the last few drops. "Mmn... Gods you're so fucking gorgeous!"

Die let out a soft sound, settling back on Kyo's chest, running his hand through the other's hair, groaning faintly. "Baby... I love you," he whispered softly. His fingertips ran over Kyo's cheek. "How bad do you want me, baby?"

Kyo ran his hands over Die's thighs, scraping the skin lightly. "Mmm, love you too." He turned to kiss at Die's fingers then shifted, groaning softly. "So damn bad... my cock's achingly hard, baby. Touch it... please. Tell me what you think..."

Die let out a little groan, cupping Kyo's cheek, and then sliding off the couch. He knelt next to Kyo, gently running his hands over his belly and then down further, running his fingers through the curls at the base of Kyo's cock. After a moment, he licked his lips and then grasped the base of his cock, making sure not to touch the head with the piercing. "Come on, baby."

Kyo's stomach twitched as Die touched him, his hips jerking slightly. He bit his lip then let out a soft laugh. "Baby, touch it... it's already 2 weeks old..." He reached down and ran his hand over the head, groaning softly.

Die breathed out a soft huff of breath, watching Kyo touch his own cock. So long of watching him and it still turned him on like nothing else. He let out a soft growl, capturing Kyo's hand in his own, starting to jerk him off using both of their hands.

Kyo let out a sound of pure pleasure as Die's hand joined his own. He pushed his hips up, the pleasure pain of touching his piercing only arousing him further. "Ahh... God... yes!"

Die shifted closer, moaning softly as he started to stroke him quicker, his pace a little more frantic. "Do it," he whispered, "I want to see you cum like this... I want to watch your face the moment you cum."

Kyo let out a somewhat desperate whine, pulling his hand away to hold Die's wrist. He opened his mouth and let out a string of escalating moans as his body arched and pushed against Die's touch. It was barely a minute later when he was crying out Die's name, his cum spurting out in great amounts over their hands. "Die!"

Die watched Kyo's face entirely this time, not even a glance down to what they were doing. No... he wanted to see his lover's face painted in the utmost pleasure, wanted to see his eyelids flutter as he came down from it, wanted to know he'd caused this. He breathed out a soft sound as his name formed on those lips and he bit his lower lip, flushing slightly. And then, after a moment, "You're gorgeous."

Kyo shuddered as he came off his orgasmic high, his breath coming in slight pants. When he opened his eyes, he gazed up at Die, licking his kiss-bruised lips. "Gods... I haven't cum since I got the piercing..."

Die chuckled softly, lifting his hand and gazing down at it, finally. "Well... that explains all of this, then." He made sure he had eye-contact with Kyo and then slowly began to lick it from his fingers, one-by-one.

Kyo let out a soft laugh then watched with great interest as Die licked his fingers, his tongue slicking out over his lips. "Fuck...Die..."

Die finished cleaning his hand and then slid down, pressing his lips to Kyo's slowly slackening length, giving him one good suck to get the rest of the cum, ensuring he didn't actually touch the piercing at all. Sitting back up, he licked his lips, and gave Kyo a devilish look.

Kyo gasped when Die's lips touched his overly sensitive cock, another shiver going through him. "Gods baby, are you just going to sit there or are you going to take me like I know you want to?"

Die let out a laugh and then gave him a contemplative look. "Maybe I'm torturing you for making me wait."

Kyo groaned softly and sat up, looking Die straight in the eye as he reached down and flicked his thumb over his piercing, his cock twitching at the action. "Mm, fine... I'll just do it myself. I'm sure that lovely red vibe of yours would do the trick."

Die lifted his chin defiantly. "Maybe I _want_ to watch you fuck yourself stupid with it."

Kyo's eyes narrowed slightly, a low growl issuing from between his lips. "Maybe I should just fuck you instead."

"Mmm... maybe so, but with your piercing still healing," he pushed himself up and leaned over, gently swiping his fingers under Kyo's chin, "you can't." He stood fully and headed past Kyo, toward the bedroom, crooking his finger. "Come."

Kyo very nearly snapped at those fingers, having known fully well he couldn't without seriously risking messing up his piercing. He let out a little huff, rolling off the couch to follow Die up the stairs, reaching out to get a handful of his lover's bare ass.

Die yelped softly, turning to smirk at Kyo and shaking his head. "You'd think you'd been starved forever." Not that he was complaining... no, far from it. He slipped into the bedroom and lightly shooed the kittens out, closing the door behind Kyo. "Mmm... come on, baby."

Kyo snorted softly. "It's been long enough..." He reached down to give the kittens each a pat, promising to play with them later, then headed into the bedroom, moving to crawl onto the bed. "Mm, so... you haven't told me what you think about it..."

Die slid across the bed and pulled the vibe Kyo had been talking about out from under his pillow, brandishing it at Kyo as he stalked toward him on hands and knees. "I think," he licked his lips, "that you can see into my soul."

Kyo gazed at Die, watching him retrieve the previously mentioned toy, a shiver of anticipation going through him. He licked his lips and smirked a little, reaching out to catch a strand of Die's hair, tugging it lightly. "Hnn... I already knew that, baby."

Die moved to kiss Kyo lightly on the lips and then chuckled. "Then you already know that I think it's amazing and a huge fucking turn-on." He settled down and gestured at the bed. "Lie down."

Kyo couldn't help the vaguely relieved look that crossed his features as he shifted on the bed, turning to stick his ass in the air as he looked back at Die with a grin. "Good..."

Die moved behind Kyo, turning on the vibrator, and gently circling Kyo's puckered entrance with it, teasing just the tip of it in and out, knowing it was small enough not to need lube just yet.

Kyo drew his bottom lip between his teeth and groaned as he felt the toy teasing him. He shifted and laid his chest onto the bed, pillowing his head on his arms as he let out a soft moan.

"You like this, baby? You want this inside you? Say it." Die leaned down, kissing Kyo's lower back, running his cheek over the other's skin.  
Kyo whimpered and pushed his hips back, begging with his body for more. "Hnn... Die... I _want_ it so bad..."

Die reached under the pillow again and then leaned back, opening the lid to the lube and pouring some directly onto his lover. He smirked a little as it ran down and he slowly began to thrust the vibe, more and more of it with each thrust, lubricating it as it went.

Kyo squirmed around, waiting on Die to lube up the vibe, letting out an unmanly squeak as lube hit his sensitive body. He clenched his hands in the sheets, moaning when Die started pushing it into him. "Ahh, fuck... yes!"

"Yes, my little slut... you like this, don't you?" He slid the vibe all the way in and turned it up, thrusting languidly, his own cock hardening as he watched the vibe slip in and out of Kyo's body.

Die's lewd teasing made him moan, his cheeks flushing slightly as he pushed back more on the vibe, a low moan sliding past his lips. "O-oh... _yes_ Die... hnng, please... fuck me harder!"

Die made sure he had a good grip on it before he started full-on fucking Kyo with the vibrator, smirking down at him.

Kyo couldn't help the loud cries and moans he let out as Die fucked him good and hard with the vibe, his back bowing as he clawed at the sheets. "Ahh... hnng... Die!"

Die slowly drizzled the lube over his own cock and then recapped the bottle, putting it on the bed as quietly as possible. After a moment, he smoothly pulled out the vibrator and pushed his cock in as a replacement, taking up the same pace almost instantly. "Fuck!"

Kyo was too busy moaning to hear Die open and close the lube so when his lover's cock replaced the toy, he let out a cry of half surprise, half pleasure, his hole being stretched in all the right ways. "DIE!"

"Yeah, baby," he hissed out, grabbing his hips and fucking him good and hard, each thrust as deep as he could possibly get it. "Ahhhh yeahhh," he offered, chuckling just after.

Kyo pushed back, meeting Die's thrusts as well as he could, panting and moaning against the pillow. He let out a breathless chuckle then got a deviant look in his eyes as he purposely clamped down around his lover's cock with a groan.

Die let out a curse and then whined softly, thrusting as fast as he could with the other clamping down like that. "Damn it, Kyo," he whispered out.

Kyo smirked then pushed himself up, bracing himself on his hands so he could reached beneath them and wrap his hand around his engorged cock, moaning. "C'mon Die... fuck me... is that all you got?"

Die let out a half-groan-half-snarl, pounding into him hard and fast, completely letting go of all his inhibitions, just fucking for the sake of fucking.  
Kyo couldn't hold on much longer, Die's fierce actions making him whine as his prostate was hit over and over. Finally, he let out a stage worthy scream as his back arched and he was cumming all over the sheets beneath him, his inner walls clenching around Die's pounding cock.

Die let out a lewd moan, sliding his arm around Kyo and simply grinding against his ass for a minute, before gasping as he started to cum, filling Kyo's passage with it.

Kyo damn near collapsed from the force of his orgasm, letting out a whimpering moan as Die released inside him. He reached to place his hand over Die's on his stomach, holding tight as he shuddered. "Daisuke..."

Die let out a breathless little chuckle, shifting them onto their sides and sliding into place behind him. "Kyo... darling," he whispered in his ear. "Did you like it?"

Kyo leaned into Die, his breath still slightly too fast. "Hnng... yes baby... so much..." He tilted his head back and to the side, catching Die's jaw with his lips. "Missed you."

Die absolutely beamed at Kyo, his eyes lighting up with it. "Mmm... I missed you like hell, too, sweetheart, so much." He pushed his hand into Kyo's hair and just held onto it, smiling at the other.

Kyo smiled softly, reached to lace his fingers with Die's other hand, squeezing softly as his eyes slid shut. "Mmm... love you."

Die snuggled up to Kyo's backside, finally pulling out of him with a soft sigh, and tugged the wayward covers up over them. "I love you, too."


	33. Chapter 33

Die's eyes glittered as he flicked his gaze up to the camera, waving at the viewers on the other side. Something about the entire night had just left him floating on a high that had been so rare as of late. So much stress and too little relief had left him a bit on edge, but doing the show bi-monthly with Yakan really helped him level out his emotions. The guy was super nice and funny as all hell, so he and Die got along pretty well.

He waited until the camera had turned off and then reached over, pushing Yakan's arm slightly. "You're going to get me stuck with that stupid nickname!"

Yakan laughed, shaking his head a little and then smirking. "Dai haaaiidoo," he mocked, holding up his hands in defense as Die swatted at him.

The pair stood up, the camera men moving to pack everything away and Die picking up his random crap, shoving it into a bag. Someone held out the rest of his popsicle-stick candy and he took it back from them, chuckling a little. "Man, I cannot believe that I did that with this thing on camera." He glanced at Yakan. "I'm never going to live that down, am I?"

Yakan's eyes flicked over the candy and then Die's face and he snorted. "Never, man... never. The fans will taunt you with those things now and call you Die Hard every chance they get!"

"I bet," Die murmured, tossing the rest of the candy in the trash and shouldering his bag. "Hey... I'm super awake still, stupid hay fever meds." He sniffed a little. "Wanna grab a few drinks before we call it a night?"

Yakan packed up his own bag and stood up, glancing at the staff. "You guys got this?" At the affirmative, he gave Die a nod. "Drinks it is!"

Almost twenty minutes later, Die and Yakan entered a nearby bar, the pair of them taking seats at the bar itself and ordering a couple of Heinekens and two shots of Jack Daniel's a piece. Die slammed both of his shots back first and then took a swig of the beer to wash it all down with, holding up his hand to the other, a grin on his face.

Yakan gave him a high-five, shaking his head as they both let out, "Yakan Dai Gaku!" and then broke down in a fit of laughter. 

The rest of the next few hours went much the same way, the pair just laughing and drinking, discussing possible topics for the next show and vaguely plotting how to torture Kaoru for his appearance as well.

At long last, Die could feel the weariness of the day seeping into his bones, and he pushed himself up off the stool. Together, they paid their tab and left the bar, sharing a cab to Yakan's place, Die taking that same cab the rest of the way home. He always figured just because he was a rockstar didn't mean he had to spend money like idiots. Besides, this was conserving the planet and Die liked the planet well enough to try to help keep it around.

He paid the driver his part of the fare and slid out, making his way up the walkway to his and Kyo's home, a smile on his face. Tonight had been a nice break from his usual routine and getting out with a friend was always a good feeling. Pulling his keys from his pocket, he opened the front door, and slipped inside, tossing his bag on the floor as he shut and locked the door. Next, his shoes and jacket were ditched, and then he made his way to the kitchen.

He leaned over as he opened the fridge, pulling out a bottle of water and unscrewing the lid as he righted himself. He took a healthy swig from it and then licked his lips. He was definitely buzzed, maybe on his way to drunk. He pressed the bottle of water to his forehead and huffed out a laugh. Granted, he was used to getting drunk on tours, but it'd been years since he'd simply gotten drunk with a friend in a bar in the middle of downtown, and somehow that just flat-out amused the hell out of him.

While Die had been out doing the show, Kyo had been finishing up some work of his own. When he was finished, he found himself lonely and bored and decided to turn on the last bit of the NicoNico show, having never actually watched it. 

What greeted his eyes soon had him frowning and an ugly green monster bubbling just underneath the surface of his mind. There his lover was, all over this stranger, touching him, leaning in close, laughing and smiling. 

The show ended and Kyo sat there, glowering at the computer screen for a moment. He debated it for a moment then went to YouTube, searching for Die's show and finding various clips. He pulled up several, watching them, each one making his mood darker. By the time he heard the door open, he was damn near livid, seething with jealousy. He glanced at the clock, realizing that a couple of hours had passed since the end of the show and that just pissed him off even further. Instead of getting up to greet his lover, he just sat there in the dimly lit living room, glaring towards the kitchen.

Die took another few swigs of his drink, completely oblivious to the other's dark mood. He licked his lips and then set the bottle on the counter, recapping it and picking up Snowball, pressing his nose to hers and cooing softly before he put her down on the floor and padded into the living room, one hand already undoing the buttons on his shirt. "Kyo?" he called, squinting into the darkened room. He reached for a light switch, flicked it on, and then moved toward his lover, a bright smile on his lips. "Hey, baby!" He came up behind him and leaned in, sliding his arms around him and nuzzling against his shoulder.

Kyo's jaw clenched when Die called his name. He was angry and was torn between screaming at Die and locking himself in the bedroom, both sounded like good options right then. How could Die be so damn... _touchy feely_ with that dude? No wonder he loved the show so much. When the light flicked on, he just stared hard at the floor, lips pressed in a thin line. Die's touch made him flinch and he stiffened under it, sniffing and getting a nose full of alcohol and cologne that wasn't Die's. He shifted away and crossed his arms, glancing back at Die then away again. "Hi."

Die could feel his lover tense underneath his touch and he frowned slightly, studying the other before he pulled back from him and moved to put his hip against the desk. "Hey... you okay?" he asked, reaching out to gently touch Kyo's cheek, fingertips brushing over the other's cheek in the most gentle of fashions.

Kyo leaned away from Die's hand and stood up, his eyes narrowed as he stared at the other. "No. I'm not. And you reek... where've you been? Some bar with _him_?"

Die blinked at Kyo as he moved away. He slowly placed his hand in his lap and then glanced at his watch, seeing what time it was and what might have his lover so incredibly pissed off at him. Two hours wasn't all that long, in fact, it was downright quick in comparison to how long he stayed out when on tour. His eyes flicked back up to Kyo's, the look on his face clearly lost. "I went to a bar after the show and we discussed what to do for the next show." He tilted his head a little, licking his lips. "I'm sorry I forgot to let you know."

Kyo huffed, nodding towards his computer. “I watched your little show tonight... Die 'haaado'..." He spat out that last part, clearly detesting the nickname. "You are rather _friendly_ with Yakan."

Die stared up at him for a moment, a look of utter hurt coming over his face. He sighed softly and lightly crossed his arms over his abdomen. His mouth flapped for a moment, and then he murmured quietly, "Well... yes, I mean... he's my friend. And we get along pretty well." He gave Kyo a strange sort of look. "And I don't like that nickname any better than you do, trust me... but the fans seem to have picked it up after us talking about the movie last show."

Kyo stared at Die, gesturing with his hands. "He's your friend, hm? Well, I don't hang all over my friends." He sniffed again, snorting a little. "And I certainly don’t come home smelling like cheap cologne and beer after."

Die's mouth fell open as he stared at Kyo in what was quite possibly the most horrified manner he'd ever looked at someone. "I... what?" He looked nothing short of devastated in that moment, his heart breaking that Kyo could even possibly think such things of him. "Baby, no!" He reached halfway for him, one hand flailing a little in the air and then falling to his side. He stared down at his feet for a moment and then pushed a hand through his hair. It was almost ridiculous how much this was getting blown out of proportion. He closed his eyes for a moment and then looked back up at Kyo. "I've never not been straight with you and I will not change that, period. I went to the bar with him, we had a few drinks, and then since he's my friend, I gave him a quick hug goodnight after we shared a cab to his place. I came straight home from there, just dropping him off at the curb."

With a sigh, he ran his hand over his thighs and shook his head. "I'd never cheat on you if that's what you're aiming at here." Some part of him wasn't just upset by it, no... some part was insulted and a bit angry, but he kept that under wraps for the time being, knowing it wasn't about to help him in this situation.

Kyo clenched and unclenched his jaw, staring at Die as the other explained his actions of the evening. He snorted and gestured towards Die's shirt. "You're wearing his shirt..." It was a pitiful argument, but Kyo had too much pent up anger and jealousy bubbling up inside. "And... like I said, you reek... of _him_."

Die stared at Kyo like he was absolutely mad. Finally, his own anger overtook rationality. "Excuse me?" he bit out, pulling at the shirt he was wearing. "This is mine, not his. I'd never fit in his clothes, even if I tried!" He huffed out a bitter and incredulous laugh, shaking his head. "Fine." He pushed himself up off the desk. "If that's how you want this, then you believe whatever your crazy mind has decided it's going to believe!" He gestured at him. "But the truth of the fucking matter is that I would never sleep around on you and if you think I would, then maybe you don't know me half as well I thought you did!"

With that, he turned away, rushing to the stairs, taking them two at a time, and going into the guest bedroom, slamming the door as loudly as he could and then turning around and screaming, "FUCK!" at it as loudly as he could. Anger seized him completely and he grabbed hold of his shirt - his brand new, fairly expensive shirt at that - and literally ripped it open, buttons flying in every direction before he took it off and flung it at the closed door. "YOU THINK I'M A FUCKING WHORE!!" he screamed at the door, tears welling up in his eyes as he stumbled back onto the bed, falling with a thud and shoving his head into his hands. After all he'd done, all he'd gone to every effort to make Kyo understand he was the tip-top of his entire life... he'd bought a home for them to live in... and now things were falling apart around his ears. And over what? A friend he hosted a damn show with. A show he'd actually been required by management to attempt to do, but had ended up enjoying in the end.

But right now... right now he hated everything to do with it. He hated management for making him do the show, he hated himself for being friendly and outgoing, and he hated Yakan for letting him be. But more than all of that, he hated Kyo for believing that he'd fuck around with someone else when all he did was love him with every fiber of his being.

He slid off the edge of the bed and shoved his face against his knees, his arms hugging himself tightly as tears slid down his cheeks. A comment from someone in his past rang clear in his mind. _Real men don't cry! Daisuke's a crybaby!_ But it only made him lose it more, the alcohol in his system really not helping a damn thing right then. All he could do was whimper out, "But I told the truth... and you won't believe me." It didn't matter that Kyo wasn't right there, he was still talking to him, still so very wounded.

Kyo was shaking with anger and emotion as Die spoke to him, angry words cutting like knives. As Die stormed out, he stared after him, scowling at his retreating back even as alarm bells went off in his head. He flinched at the sound of the door slamming, Die's screams hitting him like bricks shortly after. He stood there for a few more minutes then turned, letting out a yell of his own as his fist collided with the kitchen wall as realization finally crashed into him. Nausea washed over him in waves as the veil of anger melted, leaving him only with the sick, horrid feeling of having severely wronged his lover. And over what? Some stupid show? "Fuck..." 

He leaned his forehead against the wall he'd just punched, his hand throbbing with pain, blood leaking from his knuckles. He'd really fucked shit up this time, he always managed to. Somehow though, he'd been hopeful that with Die, it wouldn't happen. "That's what I get for wishful thinking..." He turned and slid down the wall to the floor, leaning his head on his knees, hating himself.

It was almost an hour before Die cried himself out, finally leaning against the bed, little whimpers leaving his throat every few moments. His mind was telling him of all the worst things, of the fact that just because he was friendly - okay, maybe overly so in Japanese tradition, more like an American would have been - that he'd fucked everything up with Kyo. He went over how this would play out, that he'd just have to do his best to apologize and ask for Kyo's forgiveness - for something he hadn't done - on at least a professional level. The band would _not_ die over this, of that much he was determined.

He wiped his nose on the back of his hand and let out a little cough, wincing at the way his throat felt. He sighed, pushing himself up off the floor, leaving the shirt and the popped buttons on the floor, not even thinking about it at all. He trudged into the bathroom, quietly closing the door behind himself and stripping off, getting into the shower and turning on the faucet, picking up Kyo's soap and starting to scrub himself with it. Maybe it was torture on his part, stupidity given he was quite sure everything was over after all of that. But he wanted to smell like him just one last time.

He let out a sob, slowly sliding down the shower wall to sit in the floor. He couldn't cry anymore, the tears long-since gone, but the pain was still fresh and raw, beyond that of anything he'd ever felt before. For one fleeting moment, he gave consideration to something he'd not done in a long, long time, but he pushed it away, knowing he didn't need more issues on top of this giant one.

Finishing washing up, he got out of the floor and rinsed off one more time, stepping out and drying off. He took his nightly vitamins and some pain killers for his throbbing head before pulling his robe on and slipping out of the room, his head down, pants held out from his body so he wouldn't smell like them again on accident.

Once in the bedroom, he quietly changed into a clean set of jeans and one of his well-worn Chrome Hearts tank tops. He slipped out of the room and went back into the guest bedroom, dropping his dirty pants on the floor, and then went to the bed, curling up on it, his arms wrapped around his own body in some vague attempt at comfort.

Some part of him knew they'd argue again in the morning and he held some fragile piece of hope that the other would somehow listen to him more rationally in the light of day. But he knew one thing for certain, if Kyo did let him stay in his life, he needed to isolate himself again, tell his friends no when they asked him out for a drink, and tell his lover where he was every single second. He should have known Kyo was the jealous type, but leave it to him to forget such things and end up in this personalized version of hell.

Kyo stayed where he was for nearly an hour before he finally pushed himself to his feet. He wavered on the spot for a moment, clenching his fist and groaning at the pain. It was little though, compared to that laying heavy in his chest right now. He'd royally fucked up. He let his insecurities drive him into believing something that was in no way true. He knew that the moment Die had looked at him the way he did. 

He swallowed hard as he thought of the pain in his lover's eyes, the betrayal, the _hurt_ , all caused by him. The weight of it all threatened to suffocate him, drown him in the misery he had pushed onto Die. He had moved to wash his knuckles off when he heard the shower come on. Sighing, he finished up and looked at the damage, shaking his head. They were bruised and split, but he deserved it and refused to do anything to help it. 

Instead, he waited until the shower shut off and several moments beyond that before turning and making his way upstairs, prepared to be screamed at again. When he got to their bedroom, he didn't see Die and, after a moment of being confused, turned and made his way to the guest room, opening the door and peering inside. 

Die's form curled up on the bed in regular clothing cut him to the core. He looked around and saw the torn shirt, wincing because he knew that was his fault as well.

He didn't even know how to begin to fix this in any way and instead ended up kneeling on the floor by the door, staring at Die's back with a lump in his throat. "Die... I-"

Die wasn't asleep, there was no way he was going to manage that tonight, not after all of this shit, not even with the alcohol coursing its way through his system. And he couldn't take his sleeping pills because he'd had too much to drink and the combination could have been lethal. And no matter how bad this was, he wasn't suicidal, just severely upset. When he heard the door open, he just remained where he was, waiting to be yelled at, waiting to be told he needed to take Snowball and leave right this instant, not even waiting until morning. He closed his eyes tight, trying to contain everything deep inside himself.

After a few more moments, he heard Kyo's soft voice and he knew he had to let him know he was awake. With a sigh, he pushed himself upright and shoved a hand through his damp hair. His voice was hoarse when he spoke, making it more than obvious he'd been crying. "I'll leave if that's what you want. I just don't want to fight anymore... please."

Kyo watched as Die sat up, biting his lip, waiting on the storm he knew had to be coming. What he got, however, was not what he was expecting and it caused him to make an odd choking sound. "L-leave? Die... no... I..." He stopped again, not even knowing where to start, "... fuck." He shifted and swallowed, dragging his hand through his hair. "Die..." His voice broke slightly, hands trembling as he clasped them together. "Don't... leave."

There was a long moment in which Die could have sworn he felt his heart breaking in his chest. It shot through him like an arrow of pain, his arm aching along with his heart, the simulation of a heart attack. Now he knew what this felt like, what it truly felt like to be ripped apart from the most intimate aspect and it took his breath away. Trembling, he started to push himself up from the bed. But then Kyo's voice met his ears, floundering, asking him not to leave. 

He allowed himself to rest on the edge of the bed again, his head bowed, a single tear finding its way down his cheek. He didn't even try to stop it, just watched it as it plopped onto his jeans, darkening the area slightly, and he winced a little. He didn't know what to say, didn't feel like screaming or arguing, but he knew quite well what Kyo thought of him and no argument was going to solve this. Pointless. Useless. He sniffed a little and tilted his head back the small amount of moonlight from outside glistening off his damp cheeks.

Kyo finally lost what little hold he had on his emotions, the dam breaking and overflowing, tears starting to drip down his face. What had he been thinking? Accusing Die of something like that? Now what? Die thought he wanted him to leave?! He wiped at his face and swallowed several times before shifting to get on his feet, stepping one step closer to the bed. "I don't... even... Gods." He faltered again, choking on his own words.

Die lifted his head at the last words, considering Kyo's face, the look of pain there that matched his own. After a moment, he lifted one hand toward his lover, swallowing thickly. "Come here," he murmured quietly, still so pained to see Kyo upset like this that his own emotions were on hold, pushed to the side to deal with the other man's instead.

Kyo stepped forward, reaching out to take Die's hand then stopping, shaking his head. How could he even indulge in the comfort of the other when he'd caused this mess? Instead, he moved around to kneel in front of Die, hanging his head.

Die let his hand fall to the bed when Kyo didn't take it, self-loathing welling up inside him, choking him with the complexity of it. He was stuck right back in his own personal hell and it bothered him beyond all rational well-being. A few more uncomfortable moments slipped past and Die finally sighed, standing up and skirting around Kyo. He moved to open the door and murmured, "Just... let's go to bed."

Kyo pushed himself up off of the floor, moving along behind Die, the pair of them making their way into their bedroom. But even as they lay down, Die couldn't help but feel like he had lost something that he wasn't going to get back and long after he heard Kyo's breathing even out, he was still wide awake, staring at the ceiling, lost deep in his own mind.


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

It had been nearly a week since Die and Kyo had had their falling out and it had left Die an inward mess. Outwardly, he tried his best to seem like his usual self, to be all smiles and happiness and adoration and affection. But honestly, inside he was hurting so badly that some things about him still very much changed in the duration of that week, things he couldn't possibly fight back against.

He'd used to pretty much go to bed naked, try to get something out of Kyo at least every few days, even if it was an unsuccessful attempt at it. But now he at least wore his silk pajama pants, if not a tank top as well. And he'd been slinking around after Kyo had gone to bed more often, hiding away his desires, almost ashamed of them.

He knew he was doing it and he couldn't really figure out why except that he held this sense of 'starting over' with Kyo and he didn't want to wreck anything, so he kept himself on a short leash in certain ways. He'd hidden away a magazine in the spare bedroom, in the top drawer of the night stand, so that if he woke up in the middle of the night, he could act more like it was a trip to the restroom, and still not have to be _in_ the bathroom while doing his business. But for the most part, he actually wasn't watching his porn or anything else he tended to usually do.

But in other ways, he'd become more romantic than before, somehow almost courting Kyo as the days slipped by. Breakfast ready before the other was even awake, tiny gifts that seemed meaningless on the surface but were so well thought out it was almost scary. Little notes about how much he loved Kyo and why stuck everywhere like he was some heart-sick teenager.

And then there had been today, in the studio. Even Kaoru had been looking at him strangely with how much he was doting on Kyo, constantly seeing if he needed anything else, tending to him like he was panicked to be away from him on some level. And when Kuroo had reached to give him the usual friendly hug, Die had legitimately looked more uncomfortable than anyone could remember seeing him in years. His return had been an awkward pat on the man's shoulder and trying to get away from him as soon as possible, which had left Kuroo looking confused and more than a little hurt, though Die had no idea how to even begin apologizing for it.

The hours had passed stiffly from there, finally allowing them out of the studio and they'd come home to where he'd immediately thrown himself into fixing dinner, barely even giving himself a single second to rest before he did it. And stranger yet, even though he put out wine with dinner, he didn't pour himself a single drop, and he hadn't touched the beer in the fridge since that uncomfortable night, days before. Some would have said he was acting like a man with a guilty conscience, but the truth of it was, he wanted Kyo to see how much he'd give up to make everything perfect. He wasn't guilty, not in any manner. He hadn't done a damn thing wrong. But he still felt the need to make up for the way Kyo had felt, to show him he had no reason to feel that way. Not now, not ever.

And now, sitting across from him, he gazed at the cats as they rolled around on the floor - Die having given them something called cat nip - for the first time all week, he looked amused, a tiny smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

Kyo sat next to Die, contemplating the last several days. It had been strained and odd with Die, the other constantly tending to him or fixing his breakfast or buying him gifts. It was baffling to him because he felt like _he_ should be the one sucking up, not Die. Stranger yet, Die had started wearing pajamas to bed, something he never did before unless it was frigid out. He also hadn't missed the absence of all things sexual, nor had he missed the awkward looks everyone gave them in the studio as Die tended to his every whim. 

He sighed softly, a pang of guilt going through him. He just wanted things to be normal again. He turned to look at Die, hmming softly as he noted the smile. "They're cute..."

Die nodded a little, eating a bite of the pasta he'd made, trying out something Italian for the night rather than the favored meals of Kyo's whims from the past week. He just wanted pasta, and so pasta they had. He glanced for a moment at the bottle of wine on the table and then picked up his glass of water, taking a long few drinks from it before putting it back down and putting another bite of pasta into his mouth, chewing, and swallowing.

"So, there's this part I was actually sort of thinking we should change to a slightly more upbeat tempo-" he started off, his mind seeming somewhere else entirely from where his body currently was.

Kyo nibbled at his food slowly, finding that he enjoyed the pasta and sauce Die had come up with. He watched the other's eyes flick towards the wine bottle then away and it made him frown a little. To his knowledge, Die hadn't touched a single drop of alcohol since their big fight. He contemplated that for a few moments until his lover spoke and he looked his way. "...which part exactly?"

Die hummed out a soft bit of the tune, his fingers flexing on the table with the notes. And then he shook his head. "More like this instead." He hummed out parts of it again, a few things changing on his part, picking up a bit more during bits of it.

Kyo listened then cocked his head, tapping a bit on the table as he considered the part. "Could work... play it for me after dinner?"

Die made a little face. "Can't until we go back to the studio, I need my double-neck for one piece of it." He popped the last bit of his pasta into his mouth, following it with the last bite of salad and the rest of his glass of water. He pushed back from the table and went to the kitchen using the dispenser on the fridge for more ice and water and then coming back, sitting down and taking another swallow, his fingers trembling slightly.

Kyo frowned but nodded. "Alright then." He finished eating in silence then pushed his plate back with a sigh. He sat there for a moment the stood, gathering up their dishes and taking them to the sink before coming back and settling in his seat again, finally reaching for the wine and pouring himself a glass. He didn't bother with Die because he knew he wouldn't drink it. 

He stared at the table as he took a sip of the almost too sweet drink, licking his lips after. "Dinner was good, thank you... as always."

Die nodded a little. "I'm glad you liked it," he offered quietly, his eyes flicking back to the wine again. He shifted slightly in his seat, uncomfortable with it being there in a way, but needing it to be in completely another. He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes for a moment, stretching and then standing up again, chugging his water and wincing at the headache it gave him to drink something so cold so quickly.

His eyes were once again on the wine, frustration lining his face, and a moment later, he walked the length of the room, going to the front window and staring outside, his hands shoved deep in his pockets to hide their trembling. "Kyo, I need to tell you something."

Kyo watched Die, watched him squirm around and fidget then stand and chug the water. His behavior was odd, even for the weird time they were going through. 

Die paced the room then stopped and spoke, his words like ice down his back. He swallowed a good mouthful of wine then stood himself, moving to perch on the back of the couch. "What is it?"

Die glanced at Kyo in the window, his eyes moving to cast back out over the street outside. He sighed softly and then held out one trembling hand, allowing Kyo to see it. "I..." he let out a laugh, "get this one, out of all the shit to come out of this... I uh... well I have a problem." He shook his head, tucking his hand back in his pocket and turning to actually face Kyo, his shoulders squared. "Addiction." He let out a bitter laugh. "Kyo, these are withdrawal symptoms. They're not horrible, but they're still there. And hell if I had no idea I had a problem to start with." He chewed his lower lip for a moment and then looked off to the side. "Out of all of this... we find out I'm a fuck-up with an addiction to alcohol. Who'd have thought that would come out of this?"

Kyo looked at Die shaking hand, then up to his face as he spoke. The look he gave him was full of pain and guilt before he could push it away. He swallowed slightly and glanced towards the wine on the table. 

He sighed and reached out, stroking his hand over Die's shoulder then pulling away. "So... what does this mean... then? AA meetings?

Die shook his head. "No. I'm going to ride out the symptoms and then limit myself." He sighed and glanced back at Kyo. "We both know we live a lifestyle that just trying to completely give it up is pointless. But I honestly think since it's not so bad that I can just... not drink when we're not on tour or super special occasions. And when on tour, no more of this getting bombed after the show shit." He shrugged slightly, pushing his hand back into his pocket again and bowing his head. 

"I feel like the biggest dumbass in the world you know." He gave Kyo a tiny smile. "I just thought you should know." He glanced at the wine bottle on the table. "And you should know that I'm doing stuff like serving it at dinner on purpose for myself. To resist temptation as long as I can, see how far I can push before it shoves back."

Kyo listened as Die spoke, his lip drawn between his teeth. Somehow, he felt responsible for this, as if he'd missed all the warning signs even though he was with Die nearly 24/7. Maybe he spent too much time in his own head... like he was now. He gave a sigh and brought his eyes back to his lover's face. "Die..." He paused, unsure of even what to say. "Just tell me what I need to do to help." It was lame as fuck but what else could he say? _'I'm sorry I drove you to drink yourself into being an alcoholic'?_

Die looked back at his lover and nodded a little. "Right now... there's not much you can do." He pushed one hand through his hair and offered a tiny smile. "On the plus side, I haven't been too miserable, aside from the not sleeping part. But I don't know... alcohol was never the answer for that, was it?"

Kyo's jaw worked for a moment then he nodded, shrugging a little. He ran a hand over his arm, studying the carpet instead of Die's face. "I don't suppose..." He pressed his lips together and thought back, trying to see which points in recent history that he might have missed signs or clues to Die's addiction. Sure, his lover had always been fond of the drink but... when did it become a _problem_?

Die watched Kyo's face and then he sighed softly. "Baby, don't blame this on yourself. This has been a long fucking time coming. Do you know how often I get notes from fans telling me to lay off the booze? That all they see me do is drink? How often I've ignored the hell out of them... and," he snorted a little, "really shouldn't have."

Kyo let out a huff and shrugged slightly. His hand twitched as if he was going to reach out for Die but then stilled. Everything felt so fucking awkward between them still after he nearly ripped them apart with his foolish jealousy. Now this? 

He ran his palms over his legs and looked up at Die almost sadly. "I've seen a few comments but... I've always ignored them. You've always been the one to go and party after shows... but then so were Kaoru and Toshiya. It just seemed like... normal rock band shit."

Die sighed as he settled against the back of the couch as well. "Yeah, well... it is. That's what I'm trying to say. I've been living the normal rock-star life and look where it's gotten me." He held out one hand again, watching it tremble. "This shit needs to stop before we go on stage or I'm totally fucking screwed." He shook his head a little and put his hand back on his thigh. "I hate to say it, but if it comes to it, I'll drink before the show, because I just can't fuck up that badly on stage in front of all of those people, Kyo."

Kyo winced a little, finally shifting to place his hand over the top of Die's. It hurt him that Die questioned his abilities like that. He was phenomenal guitarist, why was he so scared of messing up? Even if he did, it wasn't like anyone in the crowd would notice. They're all too blitzed out to hear that Die missed a chord or slipped on this note or that. 

He sighed softly and looked up at Die, squeezing his hand. "Die..." He started then stopped again. "...I'll support you as well as I can."

Die shifted his hand under Kyo's, curling his long fingers with Kyo's own, reveling in the moment. He'd not had nearly enough contact with Kyo and when he did get it, he made the most out of it. He wasn't entirely sure why he'd pulled back the way he had other than the fact that he felt like he was trying to start their relationship over from scratch again. But the thought of trying to engage Kyo in anything remotely sexual made his heart flip-flop and he found he was actually nervous. Maybe it was being accused of cheating that had him afraid of his own sexuality again, maybe it was just his own stupidity. Either way, he wasn't entirely sure what to do about it and had sort of decided on not going any further with it than Kyo did for the time being, just wanting things to stop being strange between them. He squeezed Kyo's fingers. "Thank you, it means a lot to me."

Kyo squeezed Die's hand a little too hard as emotions flitted through him. Aside from Die's issue with alcohol, they were also dealing with a seemingly broken relationship. How had he let it get this far? After a moment, he sighed and gave in to at least one desire, standing and moving to in front of Die, slipping his arms around him and hugging him tightly.

Die leaned into Kyo's embrace instantly, his arms slipping around his lover's torso, one hand slipping up into his hair as he held onto him as though he were the only life raft on a sinking ship to hell. He buried his face against Kyo's neck, unable to resist smelling his lover, inhaling the scent that he'd fallen in love with over the years. After a moment, he whispered out, "I love you so much."

Kyo swallowed thickly, his face pressing against Die's neck, hands stroking up and down his back. "Gods, I love you, too... so damn much." He clung to Die tightly, feeling that in this moment, if he didn't, he'd disappear and Kyo would be left alone again. 

Several minutes ticked by as he held onto his lover. Finally, he tilted his head to press his lips to Die's jaw, murmuring. "I miss you..."

For a few moments, everything was right in the world. Everything slid back into place and Die felt like nothing had changed from the past. But then Kyo spoke again and reality crowded back into his mind. He just closed his eyes and tilted his head a little, giving Kyo better access. Almost to his own horror, his body was on overdrive, instantly wanting something far more out of this. It'd only been a week, but he felt like it'd been eons. His fingers flexed on Kyo's back, the others taking a handful of short hair. He couldn't help the compulsive shudder that slid through his body, nor the way his heart pounded in his chest. He felt like a damn teenager. After a few moments, he finally managed to get his voice to work, something strained and slightly desperate about it. "Same."

Kyo could feel Die's body react against his own, a tremor sliding down his own spine as he shifted just slightly closer, pressing his lips again to Die's jaw then down his neck. He needed this, needed the contact and intimacy with his lover. Had it really only been a week? It seemed like forever. Hell, they hadn't even really been sleeping together in that time. One or the other was up, spending sleepless nights wandering their house or staring at a glowing computer screen. He sighed softly and finally moved to catch Die's lips in a desperate, needy kiss, hands fisting in his shirt. He couldn't help it, couldn't stop what he so badly wanted, craved, _needed_.

Die's breath huffed out in a soft, almost worried pant. But then Kyo's hands were fisted in his shirt, his lips moving from his jaw to cover his own mouth, and he just couldn't stop anything anymore. The fingers in Kyo's hair clenched, his lips responding to Kyo's in the most base of fashions, his need clear through his very actions. With a groan, he pushed his tongue against Kyo's lips, swiping over the lower tier, dipping barely inside to tease the little hole his lover would forever have there where he'd once held a piercing, and then slid up to lightly flick over the plush upper tier as well. And then he was pushing inside, tongue thrusting in to find what he wanted so badly, to tangle with Kyo's own slick, searching, appendage.

Everything was on fire, his nerves tingling with the need to consume his lover, to pull the other as close as humanly possible, to claim him as his own over and over, to show him all he'd been holding back. And as his mind flitted over these things, his body responded in equal parts, something he had zero control over right then.

Kyo let out a near whine as Die's tongue stroked over his lips then pushed between them, he eagerly curled his own around that intruding appendage, his hand moving to tangle in Die's long hair. He couldn't hold back the way his body moved against Die's, needing to feel him pressed against his own. A feeling of desperate need washed over him as they kissed, his hand tugging Die's hair almost harshly.

Die finally pulled back from the kiss with a low groan. "Shit, Kyo," he breathed out, the fire in his body simply raging to the point that he couldn't even begin to put it out. "I need you." He wrenched Kyo's head back to give him the darkest look of desire he'd ever given him. Leaning in, he licked over the expanse of Kyo's neck, swirling his tongue around his Adam's apple for a moment before he let him go, lightly pushing him back. "Bed. Now."

Kyo whimpered as Die pulled back and uttered the words that were dancing over his own lips. He opened his mouth to respond but then snapped it shut at the look in Die's eyes, a shuddered going through him at the intensity of it. 

He swallowed as Die's tongue lathed over his throat, fueling the fire that was steadily growing within him then let out a moan as his lover spoke. He didn't respond, only turned around and immediately headed for the stairs and their bedroom, his body trembling.

Die watched Kyo move away from him, just staring at him for a long few moments, watching that form he'd grown so desperate for over the years. With a little groan, he pushed himself away from the couch, stepped over both cats, glad they were down here and out of the way of what was about to happen.

He followed Kyo up the stairs and once in the bedroom, closed the door, leaning back against it, his heart pounding in his chest. He wasn't entirely certain he should be doing this, wasn't completely convinced that fucking Kyo into the mattress was the right course of action here. But he'd be damned if he could even remotely contain the need to do so right then.

Stepping forward, he reached to unfasten his belt buckle, pulling his belt from his pants and putting it on the dresser as he passed. Something about him was calm and control on the outside, despite the inside boiling with fear and enough desire to make him crazy with it. "On the bed," he whispered out, still advancing on Kyo.

Kyo could feel Die's on him as he moved up the stairs and into the bedroom, pausing by the bed to rid himself of his shirt. That was as far as he got before Die joined him and ordered him on the bed. The look in his lover's eyes was intense and mirrored both his own desire and his own fears that they were taking this too fast all over again. It didn't matter though, there was no way to stop this. Not now. He needed Die too badly. He stepped over and crawled onto the bed, kneeling there, his desire making an obvious tent in his pants.

Die stared at his lover, watching his muscles move beneath his skin, watching as he shifted so kneel on the bed, the perfect example of glorious masculinity and pure sex. He'd have made the most amazing centerfold in about any magazine Die could think of, and he just took a moment to appreciate that this was _his_ , not anyone else's. For how long, he didn't know, but at least right at that moment, Kyo was his to worship.

His eyes slid down his body, pausing at the other's blatant desire for him, and then flicked back up to his eyes. There he found hesitation, fear, intensity, pain, and desire. And in that moment, he wavered, uncertain as to what he was doing. Anxiety welled up inside him. What was he doing? This wasn't how this was supposed to be. There wasn't supposed to be fear involved in this, not now, not ever. And in that very moment, he made up his mind. He'd reign his desires in and he'd simply show Kyo he loved him in another way. He'd claim his mind and his heart instead of his body. That's all there was to it.

Kyo shivered under Die's gaze, eyes flicking downward as if he found it too intense. When he chanced a look back up, he could see the warring emotions playing over those dark eyes, his heart clenching at the sight. There was so much he could read from that and he felt a knot form in his throat even as his body disobeyed him and yearned for the other's touch. 

He could feel his own insecurity engulf him like the flames of hell itself as he slid onto the bed. Pulling Kyo into his arms, he moved them both until they were lying on the bed, side-by-side, his arm around Kyo's torso, fingertips refusing to follow his orders to stay still, exploring Kyo's side and his back. His mouth however, simply found Kyo's shoulder, pressing there and staying still as he closed his eyes, reigning all of his desires in, shoving them back into the box he'd been keeping them in for the past week, and jamming the lid back down on it. He nuzzled his cheek against Kyo's shoulder, marveling in the softness of his skin, his eyes shut tight.

Once Die's arms were around him again, Kyo clung to him, laying down and letting the other's lips play on his skin innocently. He allowed it for the moment, knowing that this was what they needed, but he _wanted_ more. Finally, he squirmed against Die, hands slipping under his shirt to lightly claw at his skin as he uttered a single word. "Please..."

Die's heart actually physically hurt from the plea that fell from Kyo's lips in that moment. He couldn't take it and he didn't know how to deal with any of this anymore. He wanted Kyo in that moment, like he'd never wanted anything else in his entire life. If he'd thought keeping his desire for the other inside for so long had once been hard, this was so much worse.

He swallowed hard, burying his face against the juncture of Kyo's arm and torso, just breathing in the heady scent of his lover for a few moments before he kissed a spot just north of there, his hand shaking for an entirely different reason as he smoothed it over Kyo's side. Uncertainty reigned inside him and he wasn't sure how much more he could take like this. The smallest whimper left his lips and he closed his eyes hard before finally shifting to look up into Kyo's face again, his eyes full of the need to understand as he pushed himself to hover over the vocalist's body.

Kyo hated this so much. Things weren't supposed to be this way between them. Everything was teetering on a precipice and if they fell, he knew neither of them would get back up again. No, he couldn't be without Die and he couldn't deny his need to be connected with him mind, body, and soul once again. He had to repair the frayed connection. 

Die's lips pressed to his skin and he moved a hand to brush through silky locks before his lover shifted to gaze down at him, all the pain and uncertainty showing clearly on his face. It made Kyo ache, made him want to wipe it away before it could dig any deeper into his lover's mind. He reached up, hand cupping Die's cheek, thumb moving to swipe over his bottom lip.

It was that touch that broke him, that tore his world apart and began to shove it back in all the right places again. For a moment, he was almost dizzy with the shift, the realization that he and Kyo needed this. He bowed his head, closing his eyes and simply feeling for a few moments. When he looked up again, his uncertainty was buried beneath the dark haze of lust. He needed Kyo in a way that even he couldn't quite grasp, the desperation burning thick under the surface of his every action.

He moved then, easily dragging Kyo's body where he wanted him to be, sliding between his thighs and leaning down over him, his mouth quickly finding purchase just below his jaw line, nipping and sucking there for a moment before moving on, his actions slowly ramping back up to his prior excitement, his body seemingly unable to stop anywhere in between the two ends of the spectrum.

Kyo could damn near feel the change in Die, could feel the barriers they'd each built between them crumple and fall. He couldn't stop the soft gasp that left his lips as he gazed up at his lover, the red hot desire burning in those dark orbs making his very core ache with need. He was moved to where the guitarist wanted him, his legs easily spreading for him as he moved between them. Die's warm mouth affixed to his skin and he let out the smallest sound, his hand going back to tangle in red hair, his hips jerking the slightest bit.

Die let out a growl as Kyo's hips collided with his own, instantly everything he'd been trying not to do just yet crumbling into disarray. One hand grabbed Kyo's hip, the other still propping him up over Kyo's body. His hips pressed down, his need making itself obvious as he jerked his hips against Kyo's own. 

Slowly, he trailed his lips and tongue down the pale expanse of Kyo's neck, lower and lower still, pausing to swirl over the faint lines of scars long since healed, and then over to that tantalizing little pebbled bud, lapping over it a few times and then pressing his lips fully over the darker colored flesh, sucking as he flicked his tongue over it, his hips grinding desperately the entire time, every single part of him taking off in its own direction with the desire to consume Kyo whole.

Kyo couldn't stop the cry that flew from his lips the moment Die's hips met his own, his nails digging into Die's upper arm. He forced in a breath, shuddering as Die's lips trailed over his skin, his hips arching desperately to press against the other's. Lips and tongue grazed over his nipple, drawing a whine from his lips as electricity zinged straight to his core. Lust and desire to be one were swallowing him whole and he was drowning in it but didn't care. All that mattered was Die's body against his own.

It only took Die a few minutes before he was too desperate to even remotely consider trying to calm himself down. He moved his attentions lower, to the patch of scars just beneath Kyo's peck, mouthing over them as he found the button and zipper to his lover's pants, making fast work of them, grasping his underwear and his jeans and slowly beginning to drag them down his hips.

He groaned against him, finally having to entirely shift back to get his lover naked. He sat back on his knees and hooked his fingers inside both pieces of material, slowly revealing his lover to his eager gaze. It was as exciting as the first time, his body responding in the same ways... maybe even more needy than back then, having denied himself what he already knew to be exquisite.

Kyo couldn't help dragging his hands up Die's back, leaving marks as the other's mouth worked downward over his sensitive skin. Hands worked at his pants and finally, his aching desire was freed from the tight confines and he let out a sigh at the relief of it. He licked his lips and lifted his ass, aiding Die in getting his pants off then flushed as his lover gazed him in such a manner. His length was rigid and ruddy, a pearlescent drop of pre-cum coating the piercing there.

Die stared down at Kyo, his desire flooding him in the most obvious of ways. And in that moment, he knew as much as he wanted to take Kyo, as much as he wanted to claim the other as his own with this first precious moment, that his body held other desires right then. He pulled Kyo's clothing free of his body, tossing them on the ground by the bed, only pausing to pull his own shirt over his head, tossing it to the floor as well. And in the next moment, he had his lips pressed to the tip of his lover's cock, tongue gently laving over the slit, teasing the piercing there. Pressing his tongue into the slit for a moment, he pulled it back and then lapped over the underside of the head, the most sensitive spot, trying to earn himself a vocal reward from the other before he gave him all he had.

Kyo gazed up at Die, body tense with desire, muscles flexing here and there, his cock bobbing as he did so. He was impatient, wanting whatever Die would give him right then. Still though, he remained silent, hands fisting in the sheets. He didn't have to wait long for Die to make his move and suddenly the most exquisite feeling was washing over him as Die's expert tongue began lapping at his aching length. He squirmed, fighting the desire to thrust his hips up, a soft pant of breath escaping him before he couldn't hold back any more and let out a low moan of Die's name.

Die's lips twisted into a soft smirk as he heard Kyo utter his name. That was better... more like what he was used to, what he wanted. He shifted slightly, getting into a better position for his back, and then slowly began to sink down on his lover's length, his tongue running along the entire underside as he went. Once he'd taken him all in, he moaned quietly, and then began to bob his head in just the right ways he knew drove Kyo absolutely crazy with pleasure, his eyelids fluttered to half-mast, one hand lazily rubbing over Kyo's abdomen, feeling the muscles tense and relax there, the sensation one he never got tired of.

Kyo couldn't remain still as Die's mouth worked on his cock in a way that he loved and would never tire of. One hand fisted in Die's hair and the other went to his stomach, meeting Die's, his nails scrapping over the top of it. He tried to hold back the sounds, but failed and soon he was crying out nearly constantly. "D-die... _yes_!"

Die let out a soft little whine as Kyo all but lost it under him. He wasn't sure how much more he could hold back on his own end. He was so hard it hurt, his pants straining tight over his erection. And his body ached for more contact, for plastering himself to his lover's body and staying there for as long as humanly possible. But he was diligent, determined to give Kyo the very best that he could, his palm turning up to allow their hands to clasp, his eyes flickering up to watch Kyo's face, searching for the sure signs his lover always gave him before release.

Kyo held onto Die's hand like a lifeline as he felt like he was going to fly off the edge of the world. His hips bucked up sharply, pushing his cock to the back of Die's throat. Finally, after a few more times of thrusting lightly into Die's mouth, the coil within his belly snapped and with a keening cry, he found bliss, reached out and touched heaven as his very essence spilled into Die's mouth.

When Kyo came, Die was expecting it, his lover showing all the signs he usually did. But that didn't make the moment any less intense. He groaned as Kyo came, the taste of his cum spurting across his tongue exactly what he'd been searching for in this moment. What surprised him the most was how he reacted to it. As the final spurt of Kyo's release pulsed out into his mouth, he felt the telling throb in his own cock, his own release so damn close he could virtually taste it. He let out a quiet whine as he pulled off Kyo's length, licking the head once again before settling on simply watching Kyo. This... he'd needed this so much. But he didn't want to outright lose it like this. Not right then, not like this. He moved forward again, his hand keeping Kyo's occupied as he moved to press kisses lightly over Kyo's abdomen and then across the scars he found there, teasing them with his tongue in some vain attempt to calm down.

Kyo settled against the bed again, moaning softly when Die licked at his cock. He opened his eyes partially to gaze at his lover, his hand squeezing around his. His lover moved to press kisses to his slightly trembling stomach, tongue flicking over old scars and then the newest one he'd inflicted upon himself. He shivered, wondering if Die would find the still healing scratches along his hip bone, a product of self-hatred over the last week, a moment of weakness that he'd been unable to control. 

His free hand slid down over Die's shoulder blades, scraping the skin there as he murmured his lover's name. "Die..." He wanted the other to claim him, make them physically one. He didn't want to push it though, not yet.

Die hovered over Kyo, his control dancing on a razor-sharp edge between being just fine and falling over the side into uncontrollable passion. He sighed softly as he pushed himself closer to Kyo, needing the contact as he trailed his mouth back up to the other's taut little nub, nipping lightly at it and then suckling harshly in an attempt to draw some sort of sound from him again. He needed Kyo like he didn't think he ever had, in ways he was certain were reserved for debauchery at the most base of levels. 

It took him almost ten more minutes of exploring before he could stand it no longer. He pushed himself up enough to hover over his lover, claiming his mouth harshly with his own as both hands worked his own pants open, shoving them down his hips to rest around his upper thighs. He couldn't even stop long enough to get them fully off, his need was so great for the other.

His fingers slid under the pillow a moment later, searching for the lube they kept there. But he couldn't find it and his heart clenched in his chest, a frustrated whine ripping free of his throat. He wanted Kyo, needed him like he needed air to breathe right then. "Oh gods, I can't," he whispered out, his voice strained, his need clear in every single line of his body in that moment. His teeth lightly grasped Kyo's lower lip between them and tugged ever so slightly. In the next moment, he was pressed against his lover's body, his cock sliding alongside Kyo's own, his movements built entirely of a desperate man. He was so hard it hurt, and he needed release like he'd never needed anything else in his life. "Please," he choked out, his hips just slowly flexing, dragging his cock against Kyo's body, over and over.

Kyo held on to Die, letting out little whimpers and whines as the other teased him to the point that he was hard again, hips rolling up to press against Die's jean-clad thigh. The desire swirling around them was palpable and when Die finally reached for his pants, Kyo's thighs spread automatically in anticipation, his lips eagerly pressing against the others. A frustrated whine met his ears and he tilted his head up, seeing Die's hand under the pillow, searching for their lube. It must have fallen back. He let out a whimper of his own then looked up at Die, shifting and arching his hips up, pushing against Die's body as the other began moving against him. 

The desperation was clear in his lover's voice and movements and it was fueling his own. After a moment of letting Die rut against him, he brought his hand up and spat into it before reaching between them, stroking over Die's length for a moment, smearing it with spit and precum. "Take me... _now_..." He was beyond caring, just needed this so much right then. The pain would be worth it.

Need boiled low in Die's abdomen, a look of almost pain slipping over his features as his pleasure skirted through his body. He was so hard, so frustrated, that a low keening whine slid from this throat, completely unable to be stopped. And then Kyo's hand was on his cock and he almost lost it all right there, his every nerve on fire, his hips bucking hard into Kyo's hand as the other lubed him up with spit. The demand falling from his lover's mouth was the last coherent thought he could find. He couldn't even think about what he was about to do, he simply acted on it. He lifted Kyo's thigh, positioning himself with ease, his body on autopilot for such things, and then he thrust forward, just one sharp snap of his hips and he was buried in that tight heat.

His body arched back, his jaw going slack in complete bliss, his eyes unfocused as he thrust into his lover a few more times before he simply couldn't hold it back any longer. He was too close to his brink, too tortured by not having _really_ touched Kyo since their fight, and he just lost it. A soft huff of breath was all that told of what was coming, and then he was gone, every last thought wiped from his mind as he ground his hips against Kyo, his length pulsing inside the other, filling him with his very essence.

Kyo let out a cry as Die finally pushed into his body, a flash of hot pain going through him then pure desire overtaking him as his lover started moving. It didn't last long, he knew it wouldn't but it was just as fulfilling as Die began to cum, filling him, coating his insides with his seed. He didn't even hesitate, reaching down to stroke his cock furiously for a moment before slipping off the edge for the second time that night, his body clenching around Die's cock as he spurted onto his stomach. " _Die_!"

Die let out a choked little whimper at Kyo came, pressing his head to Kyo's shoulder as he rested there, panting, the stress literally draining out of his body, leaving him feeling exhausted and like he was coming off the longest high in history. He let out a soft groan, not pulling out of his lover's body, but lowering himself to rest on him, curling himself up around him, both arms under him, his eyelids closed as he looked nearly like he was going to pass out from the relief of it all.

Kyo's arms wrapped around Die's body, holding him close as his body shuddered a bit the relaxed into the mattress. He buried his head against his lover's neck, clinging to him. Several minutes passed by before he finally lifted his head enough to speak, whispering gently against Die's ear. "I love you, so damn much."

Die finally shifted, managing to get them on their sides, legs still entangled, one of his hands slipping up into Kyo's hair as the other professed his love to him. He pressed his lips to Kyo's shoulder and breathed out, "I love you, too, more than anything in this entire world." He gently pulled on his hair, a soft sigh of pleasure slipping through his lips as he finally realized something, his lips pulling up in a gentle smile. "I forgive you."

Kyo tried so hard to keep his emotions in check, but as soon as the words slipped from Die's lips, he lost it. He squeezed his eyes shut even as moisture gathered in the corners and spilled down his cheeks and onto Die's skin. He took a shuddering breath and whispered out, "Thank you."


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

Die came back into wakefulness somewhere around four in the morning. He rolled over and blinked at the clock, making a disgruntled little sound before his gaze flicked over to Kyo. Kyo... in his bed. He breathed out a soft sigh of relief. Good, it hadn't been a dream then, his lover was really here and they'd really had their make-up moment earlier in the evening.

He pushed one hand through his hair, lying on his back for a few minutes, just staring up at the ceiling. Some part of him was still quite ashamed of how quickly things had ended. But then, he'd been so pent up, he couldn't even help it. It wasn't like this past week had been the beginning of their not having sex spree. No, it was just the last week of it, and as much as it frustrated Die, he had far more urges than most people he knew.

With a soft sigh, he gently pushed himself into a sitting position, determined not to wake Kyo up with his actions. He settled back against the headboard and gazed at his lover for a few more long moments before sliding his hand under the sheets, grasping his own hardened length. Yeah... what was that about needs again? He tilted his head back, arching into his own touch as he started to stroke himself.

He feared this, feared doing it where Kyo could catch him. But it wasn't like he hadn't felt his lover doing the same at a few points in their relationship. And, besides, he needed to get over his fears, needed to be a bit more honest with Kyo about how often he wanted things like this, if for nothing else than to help him understand. Though, admittedly, he was terrified of Kyo waking up to this.

Kyo was sleeping better that night than he had in nearly a month. He was sleeping so well in fact that it wasn't Die's movements that woke him, but a full bladder, and even then he lay there, trying to put off having to get out from under the cocoon of covers and Die's arms. 

Upon that last thought, he blinked a little, realizing that Die had shifted away. At first, he felt a tremor of fear that the other had left him to sleep in the guest room, but then he heard the barely audible rustle of the sheets. 

Opening his eyes fully, he looked over and down, seeing Die's hand working under the cover. He bit his lip, shifting the tiniest bit as the pressure in his bladder and an insatiable desire for Die brought him slowly to full arousal.

He didn't want to move yet though, somehow wanting Die to get really into it before he let him know he was awake. He wasn't sure how long he could last though, already having to force himself to keep from squirming.

Die's hips arched a little, his hand pumping faster for a moment, before he forced himself to calm down a little, his eyelids slipping closed as he pressed back against the headboard, the wood creaking just the slightest with his movements.

A tiny huff of a desperate sound slid free of his lips, his other hand pushing at his pants that he'd never quite gotten rid of in the night. Once he had them at the bottom of the bed, he pulled his legs free, one slim appendage sliding up and out to the side a little. He slid his middle finger into his mouth, licking at the digit, not even fully coherent of what he was about to do, of what he was giving away in this moment if Kyo should wake up.

His hand disappeared back down beneath the sheet, the slim digit pressing into his body. He simply held it there, his other hand still working his cock in an almost frantic manner, his arousal growing steadily higher and higher. His eyes flicked over to Kyo's body, taking note of the rather obvious tent in the sheet. He bit his lower lip to try to hold in the gasping whimper. Kyo had to be dreaming of something nice for sure... or it was just that he had to piss. But either way, the thought was still arousing to Die, and he focused on it for the time being, his hips shifting a little, finger sliding into his body a little more. "Ah yeah," he breathed out, barely even audible.

Kyo watched Die closely with half lidded eyes, biting his lip as he saw the other's finger slide into his mouth. He had a feeling he knew where that digit was going to end up and he wasn't disappointed as Die slid his hand beneath the covers. 

He was quickly losing control over his arousal and bladder and in a moment of weakness, ended up pushing his hips up against the sheet, letting out the tiniest whimper as he did, his eyes fixating on Die's face to see if his lover even noticed.

Die's eyes never left Kyo's body. He was quite obviously actually using his lover to jerk off to and he wasn't even remotely ashamed of that part of it. He breathed out a soft moan as Kyo's hips shifted, sucking his lower lip into his mouth to try to shut himself up as he paused in stroking himself, instead his other hand moving for a moment, fucking himself with his finger. A few more shifts and then Heaven. His head fell back against the headboard and for a moment, he was overcome with bliss, his hand vigorously moving to abuse that bundle of nerves deep inside him.

He let out a little whimper and finally stopped, trying to regulate his breathing and failing miserably. His hand jerked over his cock a few times and then stopped again. He was so obviously close, but he was toying with himself, unwilling to let it happen just yet.

Kyo bit his tongue hard to keep from moaning as Die obviously finger fucked himself. It was really getting him off that his lover's eyes hadn't left his body during this whole time and he found himself squirming more and more. 

When Die stopped for a moment, Kyo hesitated for a split second then, making sure he was being watched, pushed his hips up a little and let out a spurt of piss, dampening the sheet around the head of his cock. He didn't move other than that and didn't open his eyes fully, intent on seeing Die's reaction instead.

Die had just started to move his hand again when his lover's hips pushed up. He let out a little wanton sound and in the next moment, he gasped, his hips pushing up into his hand, finger burying itself deep up inside his body. He watched as the sheet around Kyo's cock dampened with what could have only been piss.

A shudder of pure desire slammed into him and he just couldn't help it. "Oh fuck," he breathed out, thighs spreading further, his finger fucking rapidly in and out of his body as he strained up into his pumping fist.

Some part of him knew he should wake Kyo up, should let him know before he wet the entire bed and woke up in utter humiliation. But he couldn't help it, it was too much for him right then and he wanted nothing more than to cum while watching this. His hips shifted again, the covers falling down to reveal what he was doing in those final seconds, his hips bucking and a strangled cry of pleasure leaving him before he could even remotely think to stop it. And then he was cumming, the most pained and aroused look on his face, as though he'd needed this so much that he'd completely lost the ability to determine the difference between pleasure and pain.

Kyo held back as long as he could while Die went after himself but didn't have the strength to just hold it back like Die did and as his lover came, he let out a sound and began pissing again, the wet spot on the sheet growing as piss leaked from his cock in irregular spurts, hindered by his arousal. 

He wondered in those moments what Die would do, if he had the wherewithal to do anything about it at all seeing as how he had obviously just jizzed his brains out.

Die lay there against the headboard panting as he came down from his orgasm. His cock was still hard, even as he pulled his finger free and reached for the tissues on the bedside. He mopped up his mess and cleaned off his fingers.

As he was tossing the tissue into the trash, he glanced back over at Kyo, watching as the wet spot grew larger and larger. For a moment, he just sat there, his mouth working in shock, no sounds coming out. But a moment later he pushed himself into action. He leaned over the edge of the bed and grasped the towel Kyo had left there from a few days earlier and slid back across the bed. Without even thinking on it, he pushed half of it under Kyo's rear-end, saving the bed from too much of this, and then pressed the rest of it over the top of his cock, shuddering slightly as the damp sheets brushed over his hand, still aroused beyond belief by what was happening.

"Kyo," he breathed out, "Kyo wake up." He let out a thin whimper and nudged him with his elbow. "Hey, wake up!"

Kyo struggled hard not to cry out when Die's hand brushed over him as he stuck the towel under his ass and then covered his cock with it. He couldn't stop the flow of piss now if he wanted to and instead just let it soak into the towel, feeling it starting to finally taper off. 

Die nudging him to wake up had him smirking as he finally opened his eyes fully and murmured, "I am awake..."

Die sat there on his knees, staring down at Kyo, his eyes wild with something that was about half fear and half arousal. At the comment, he let out a strangled little sound and then looked around like he was completely lost. After a moment, he whispered, "But... you... this?"

Kyo licked his lips and nodded, grunting as he pushed the last little bit out onto the towel then settled back with a sigh, his cock still mostly hard. "Mmhmm... I was watching you."

The guitarist flicked his eyes down to the wet spot on the sheet and then back up to Kyo's face, making strange little sounds the entire time. After a moment, he ducked his head in embarrassment and shifted slightly. "I... you.... ah god," he whispered, his cheeks heating up as he put two and two together finally somewhere inside that sleep-mushed brain.

Kyo chuckled darkly then shifted, pushing the soiled sheets away as well as the towel, thankful the bed didn't get damp. He shifted to a semi-sitting position, reaching into the drawer for their elusive lube and held it out to Die. "Since you're already half-prepped...why don't you get on my cock and ride me?"

Die stared at him for a moment and then huffed out a soft laugh. He reached out, grabbing the lube from him and taking the towel, tossing it to the floor before he swung one leg over the other's hips and lowered himself to sit on Kyo's thighs. He unscrewed the lid and squirted some of it onto his fingers, pushing them up under himself for a moment and fucking two digits in and out of his passage before he squirted a healthy amount over Kyo's cock.

Licking his lips, he reached for the headboard, holding onto it as he shifted over Kyo's cock and slowly sank down on it with a groan, a look of bliss sliding across his features as he settled down. His hips began to rock, his own cock still standing at full attention despite his orgasm only a few minutes earlier.

After a few more moments of that, he finally began to raise and lower himself on Kyo's stiffened length, groaning at the friction of it, enjoying the feel of his lover's cock stretching his opening. "Yes," he breathed out, starting to move a little bit faster. "Ah fuck, ah!" A near steady flow of moans and curses slid from his mouth as he fucked himself on Kyo's cock.

Kyo watched with great interest as Die once again fingered himself, something about the act quite arousing. He shifted as Die did, then reached out, grasping his lover's hips as his body lowered onto his cock, a moan pulling free from his lips. He had barely a moment to adjust to the feeling of Die's hot body wrapped around his cock when the other began to move, riding him with a steadily growing pace. 

He couldn't help himself as his hand went to swat Die's ass as it bounced on his cock, lewd words spilling from his lips. "Oh _fuck_ yes! Yes, Die! Fuck...ride my cock!"

Die grunted softly, bowing his head as he moved over the other, completely unabashed in his desperate need to feel the other like this. He rode him hard, his dick straining hard up in front of him, his eyes full of arousal that he couldn't even begin to contain.

He let out a whimper, licking his lips as he pressed down hard on him and rocked his hips harshly back and forth. A low groan issued from his lips as he stopped for a moment, watching as his cock jerked a few times, a thin drizzle of cum sliding from the tip and pooling on his lover's abdomen. He hadn't actually orgasmed, but it just felt so good he couldn't stop his body's reaction to it. "Oh god," he whispered out, in the next moment just outright fucking himself hard on his lover's cock, barely contained at all as he moved.

Kyo's hands held on tight to Die's hips, nails digging into the flesh there as he brought his knees up and began thrusting hard into Die's body, meeting his movements as best as he could. 

He shuddered as he felt his lover's body flutter around him then saw the cum drip from his cock. He moaned then resumed pushing his hips up, his head pushing back into the pillow. "Fuck, DIE!" He was close, so close it hurt, just a little bit more and he would lose it. 

He shifted one hand down to grasp Die's cock, jerking him with erratic movements. "Fucking cum for me, Daisuke!"

Die let out a whimper as Kyo grabbed his cock and started thrusting up into him almost erratically. He shifted his angle just the smallest amount and then he was in complete control of the situation, bliss washing over him instantly. His cock throbbed, his cheeks flushed, and his mouth parted to voice his desire in the loudest way possible. His hips moved, helping Kyo as he fucked himself on his lover's cock, the power of their combined thrusts doing things to him that he couldn't even begin to describe.

He let out another frustrated sound and then a sharp cry, plunging down on Kyo's cock hard and then grinding against him, rocking hard a few times, his hand grabbing Kyo's over his cock and jerking in harsh upward movements as he lost it, cum erupting from his cock, raining down over Kyo's abdomen and chest. "Ah yeah!" he cried out, throwing his head back as he bucked hard up into their hands a few more times, his arousal at peaks he didn't even know himself capable of right then.

Kyo watched as Die lost it on his cock, the way his face flushed, the desperate sounds he made as he pushed down so hard on his cock that it damn near hurt. Cum painted his stomach and chest white and he reached down immediately to drag his fingers through it, sucking them into his mouth as he snapped his hips up a few more times then let out a loud scream, cumming hard into Die's body. "FUCK!"

Those last few thrusts had Die crying out in pleasure, completely lost in it at that point, whimpering as Kyo shoved up the final time and he felt the warmth of his cum spilling inside him. He ground back against him. "Yes," he whispered out. "Yes, yes... oh god yes, ah shit.... oh god, baby, fill me." He shuddered a little, biting his lip as he moved a few more times before settling down, looking more than a little bit dazed.

Kyo pushed his hips up once more then collapsed back on the bed, panting hard, a light sheen of sweat on his forehead and chest. He held onto Die's hips, thumbs stroking over his lover's hip bones as he fought to catch his breath, his cock faintly throbbing. "Gods..."

Die lay there against him, his cheeks flushed and his lips parted as he panted for his breath, the occasional little whimpering sound slipping past his lips as he tried to breathe properly. After a few long minutes, he finally disengaged himself from Kyo, hovering over him as he flexed, Kyo's cum dribbling back out over the other's cock. He let out a little huff of a laugh and then slid off to the side, collapsing back on the blankets, his face completely blissed out.

Kyo groaned when Die moved off of him, his cock slipping out with a soft ‘plop’, cum dripping over it. "Hnng..," was all he could muster in way of response, a huff of breath leaving him afterwards.

Die lay there on his back, unfocused gaze on the ceiling for near twenty minutes before he huffed out a soft laugh. "You dirty fuck," he whispered out, a smile on his lips, the term endearing as all hell. "You knew I was staring at you, didn't you?"

Kyo come out of a half dozing state when Die spoke and snorted softly. "Yeah...I did..." He smirked and turned on his side to look at Die, licking his lips. "And you liked it..."

Die wet his lips a little and then let out a soft laugh, shaking his head. "Fuck yes, I did." He rolled a little, flopping his head off the side of the bed and staring at their dresser upside down, letting out a little groan. After a moment, he stretched, reaching his hand out toward the dresser and making a little sound as his back popped in a few places before he settled again.

Kyo watched Die, chuckling a little. "Hnn.." He shifted and arched his own back, groaning as it popped. "You know, baby, I really miss your massages..."

Die rolled over a little bit and made a soft noise at Kyo's not-so-subtle request. He curled himself up and then stretched out the other direction, rolling to his hands and knees. "Mmm... roll over."

Kyo hummed softly and did as Die asked, huffing as the mess on his stomach smooshed into the bed a bit. He'd forgotten about that but he didn't care at the moment, the prospect of feeling Die's hands on him outweighing any discomfort.

Die chuckled softly at Kyo's huff, straddling his backside and making himself comfortable. "Have I ever told you just how much I love your ass?" He ground into it a little bit and licked his lips before shifting forward and starting in on massaging Kyo's upper back.

Kyo smirked, wiggling said ass then settling, letting out a groan as Die's hands started working on him. "Mmm...you might have but I don't mind hearing it again..."

Die's long fingers dug into the cramped up muscles, loosening as he went. For a moment, he debated being even more dirty, but decided he could save that for another time, actually satisfied for the first time in a while. His hands moved over his lover's body, finally working out the muscles and moving to just rubbing Kyo's back, his gaze finally actually focusing on the man in front of him, watching as his fingers smoothed over tattooed skin, reveling in the beautiful canvas that was his chosen life-partner's skin.

He scooted back a little bit, moving to rub his hands over the other's lower back, just before the outward press of his ass, fingers working there for a moment, knowing how bad that area could hurt sometimes. But then his fingers paused, his gaze focused on something new, something he probably shouldn't have been rubbing over, and he slowly pulled his hand away, letting out a little whimper, his hand coming up to press over his mouth.

He made the most amazed sound and then reached for it again, fingertips in the air over this new tattoo, his heart swelling to the point he thought for a moment, he might actually lose it and cry. But he let out a little watery laugh and then a huff of amazement. "Oh wow... really, baby?" he asked softly. "You... you did this for me?"

Kyo practically sunk into the mattress as Die's fingers dug and rubbed at his skin, stress melting away under his lover's ever talented hands. 

As Die moved lower, a smile spread on his face, anticipating his lover's reaction to the design that he had yet to reveal to him. And it was one that was worth it, too. Die's voice trembling with emotion as he felt his fingers ghost over it. 

"Yeah, I did... because... I know, with 100% certainty, that I will always be your's... no matter what."

That was all it took for the rest of Die's resolve to crumble and he pressed one shaking hand to his mouth, a single tear escaping and running down his cheek. After all this shit, all the fighting and the agony, and he finally let it go with a rush of relief that he couldn't even begin to comprehend, his hand shaking as he managed to move himself off of Kyo so he could move if he wanted, sitting cross-legged on the bed, his eyes filled with unshed tears as he reached his hand for his lover, wordlessly begging him to come to him.

Kyo bit his lip hard then shifted as soon as Die was off of him, sitting up and moving to wrap his arms around Die's waist, swallowing hard. No words seemed adequate so he just pressed his lips to Die's shoulder, uncaring of the tears that leaked from his own eyes.

Die tugged Kyo closer to himself, burying his face in his lover's short, black hair and taking in his scent, his hands moving over him in a completely different sort of desperation. Finally, he pulled Kyo fully onto his lap, wrapping his arms around him tightly and burrowing his face against his neck with a soft huff of breath.

Kyo let Die pull him into his lap, shifting and adjusting then threading his fingers into Die's hair, pressing his lips to his lover's forehead. After a few moments, he started humming softly. It was a song he'd written just for Die, though the other wouldn't know that, but it was something he refused to share outside their bedroom.

Die sat there quietly, a certain amount of calm slipping over him as Kyo started to hum, his body relaxing and his fears and pains slipping away. His fingers moved lightly over Kyo's back as the other continued, at first rubbing, then lightly scratching, before he went back to rubbing again to soothe away the effect that scratching had had on him.

Kyo continued to hum for a bit then stopped, letting out a soft, content sigh before turning and lifting Die's head up, kissing him gently. "With all my heart, I love you, koi."

Die accepted the kiss and then gave Kyo the most heart-melting smile he had ever applied to his face in the next moment. "And I you, my love."


	36. Chapter 36

Breathless, Die exited the studio and stepped out onto the street below. The breeze picked up his newly cut hair and he shook it back out of his face, glancing over at Yakan and raising a single finger to indicate he should wait as Die took a few steps to the side for a moment of privacy.

He pulled out his phone and selected Kyo's number, glancing at the time and thinking to himself that it'd be nice if Kyo had waited on dinner tonight. He hadn’t been lately on the nights of Die's show, but it wasn't really something they had actually discussed. Wetting his lips, he put the phone to his ear and waited on Kyo to answer, still riding the high that being on the show tended to give him. It was like a miniature version of the high he got from being on stage, guitar in hand, and it was so nice to have found a second thing he liked in this way.

Kyo had, as he had been for the last few times, settled down and watched Die's show with Yakan. He still felt lingering jealousy, but it was more of a territorial sort of feeling whenever Yakan touched Die or vice versa. He was slowly coming to terms that his lover just really couldn't keep his hands to himself. 

He had just gotten up to visit the toilet when the sounds of an acoustic guitar met his ears. He smiled softly, listening to the melody for a second before pulling his phone from his pocket and answering it. "Hey, baby. What's up?"

The moment that Kyo's voice came through the line, Die was grinning brightly. "Hey, pookie." He paused, his tongue rolling lightly in his mouth, as though tasting the way the word felt on his tongue and he chuckled. "I think I like calling you that," he murmured before laughing brightly. "Hnn... anyway," he cleared his throat and tried to lower his voice to a more suitable range so as to not be overheard. "So... I was thinking, if you haven't eaten... maybe we could get some dinner with Yakan? I want you to actually meet him and... well... because of... you know."

Kyo choked slightly at the nickname. " _Pookie_?! Cute, baby... but no." He let out a soft laugh, shaking his head and muttering, "... pookie indeed." He listened to Die's request and bit back a sigh. It wasn't that he thought Yakan was a bad guy, it was just that he'd really stepped in it when accusing Die a while back and now, he was nervous as fuck to be around the other male. 

He hummed softly then cleared his throat. "Ah... well, are you sure it'd be okay with, you know...?"

Die took to twirling a piece of his hair around his finger and then made a small sound into the receiver to let Kyo know he was thinking. After a few more moments, he finally came out with, "Yeah, I'm sure. I just... think this is needed. You know?"

Kyo had made his way into the bathroom by this point, rustling around and getting his fly open to take care of business. He was quiet for a few moments, lips pursed as he considered what Die was wanting. He didn't want to, just on the principle of going out and being social, but his lover had a point. Finishing taking his leak, he sighed and nodded against the phone. "Yeah, okay. Meet you somewhere, or...?"

The sounds of what Kyo was doing drifted over the phone and Die groaned faintly, his cheeks heating up, unable to stop the reaction, even on a public street, right in front of Yakan. He just thanked his lucky stars that no one would know why he made the sound except Kyo. "Yes, there's a little bistro that's open all night. Chez something or other... it's two blocks south of here." He knew Kyo had to remember where he was at given that he'd pointed it out to him several times before. "Within the next hour?" he asked.

Kyo let the slight smirk cross his face at Die's little sound. It was nice to know that he could always turn his lover on in his own in special ways. "Yeah, I remember it..." He rinsed his hands then looked in the mirror, huffing at his five o'clock shadow. "I’ll be there. See you then."

Die's tongue slid out of his mouth and he licked his lips a little. "Okay, and, hey... thank you," he murmured before disconnecting the call. He shoved his phone into his pocket and sidled over to Yakan, lightly bumping the shorter man in the shoulder. "So... you're coming to dinner with me and a special someone. No arguments."

Yakan smiled at him and then shrugged. "I haven't got any plans, so I'm cool with that." He reached out to flag a taxi down, flicking his eyes over Die's form and the way he was holding himself. "This is important to you, isn't it?"

Die nodded, running his hand through his hair. "Yeah. It really is." He glanced around them and made sure no one was close enough to hear. "Just... so you're not in shock, uh... it's someone you're familiar with in concept, but don't actually know in real life yet."

Yakan smirked at him. "I've got an idea, but... we'll leave the suspense to see if I'm right."

Die laughed softly and shook his head. "You know... I really just hadn't told you because I hadn't quite gotten to that comfort zone of sharing my personal life entirely with you. But, now... I dunno, I feel like it'll be okay."

"Completely understandable," Yakan replied as he finally got a taxi. He slid into the car and then glanced at Die. "Uh... where were we going?"

Die let out a laugh and pointed. "Two blocks that way. The Chez, whatever it was called, bistro."

The driver turned to look at them and then chuckled. "Hey... I was just watching your show on break!" He waved at them. "For such a short ride, we'll do this for free."

Die looked a bit embarrassed as he got in as well and settled down on the seat, humming softly as they started to move off toward the bistro.

Meanwhile, Kyo had taken care of his scruffiness and styled his hair. He got dressed in jeans with a simple but nice black, button-up shirt. After adding a bracelet that Die had given him, a couple of silver necklaces, his wallet and chain, and a pair of Chrome Hearts glasses, he considered himself dressed and moved to the hall to put his boots on before grabbing his keys and phone and heading outside.

Deciding to be different, or perhaps it was showing off, he made his way to the driveway and unlocked the doors to his sleek black car. He rarely drove, generally letting Die do it all, but tonight, he felt like having that control. He slid into the driver's seat and started the engine before pulling out and driving towards the bistro Die had mentioned. 

It didn't take him long to get there ad soon he was pulling up to the place, parking and getting out, sliding his hands in his pockets as he walked in. He informed the hostess that he'd be meeting two others then went to sit, ordering a rare drink of warm sake.

With all the fuss and everything, Die and Yakan ended up talking with the cabbie for a while before finally getting out of the car, laughing as they left, and waiving the guy off with his new passenger. For a few more moments, they stood on the curb, laughing over how embarrassing it had been to be recognized so readily by someone who was obviously a fan.

Both grinning, they made their way into the bistro. Almost instantly, the hostess descended on them and asked if they were meeting another gentleman. Die acknowledged that they were and the pair of them followed her to the area she'd seated Kyo in. Thankfully, it was mostly a private area, sort of cornered off from the rest of the bistro and not near any windows, the bar hiding them from view of most of the other patrons.

Die stepped around the corner and tried to keep Yakan behind him until the last second, finally stepping up to Kyo and briefly sliding his arm around Kyo's middle, giving him a one-armed hug, the most that they'd ever accomplished blatantly in public, and he turned to see his co-host's reaction.

For his part, Yakan looked completely shocked, but in a positive sort of way. He gestured between them and made a soft sound, then stepped up and offered Kyo his hand in a very American sort of greeting. "It's a pleasure, for certain!"

Kyo sat there and managed to finish off most of the small pitcher of sake he'd ordered while waiting for Die. After a while, he'd taken to playing some stupid game on his phone, a slight frown on his face as it got later. 

He was about to call Die when he spotted his lover walking his way. He offered him a little smile then blinked at the hug, returning the gesture by running his hand over Die's back briefly before peering around him at Yakan. He reminded himself to be polite and stuck out his head, albeit a little hesitantly. "Same..." 

Die chuckled and then quietly explained to Kyo, "I hadn't told him who I was seeing... or uh... that I'm into guys, so..." he shrugged a little, "just hadn't quite gotten to that level of trust until now is all."

Kyo looked to Die and just nodded, shrugging his shoulders slightly. "Ah, I see..." He felt a bit uncomfortable but he shifted over for Die to sit next to him, his hands coming to rest folded on the table.

Die carefully slid in next to Kyo and gestured for Yakan to have a seat. The other did exactly that and then picked up a menu, reading over the options and then placing it on the table and leaning forward toward Kyo, still completely oblivious to anyone's personal bubble. "This is fabulous... I really had no idea. I mean, I never thought... wow, just wow!" He threw his hands up and then laughed. "Amazing!"

Die had to bring his hand up and press it to his lips to stop himself from laughing at Yakan's reaction to Kyo, drawing a menu toward himself as well and flicking his eyes over the options presented to them.

Kyo bristled much like a cat would when Yakan leaned close to him, invading his very personal space. He held up his hand and waved it a couple of times. "Ah… it's ah... yeah..." He sort of trailed off, unsure what to even say to this person across from him that was behaving for all the world like a bouncing puppy. 

He shot Die a side glare then cleared his throat, picking up the menu just for something to do with his hands. He shifted in his seat, trying to relax his now rigid back, resisting the urge to sigh. 

Die couldn't help it, he let out a soft laugh and then cleared his throat as he crossed his legs beneath the table, leaning slightly toward Kyo without even realizing he was doing it. He pointed to one of the options on the menu. "Look, there's a huge sandwich, soup, and salad option that says it can be shared. Want to do this? You choose the sandwich and I'll choose the soup and salad options?"

Yakan just sat there, staring at the pair of them with a pleased sort of expression on his face. It was as if he couldn't quite get past the novel concept of the whole thing. After a moment, he burst out with, "It's a shame Shinya bolted off like that tonight!"

Kyo huffed softly then looked at the menu, nodding in agreement with Die. "Yeah, okay. I want the chicken club then." He shifted back, sipping at the water he had now, the sake having made him feel a little fuzzy around the edges.

Yakan suddenly just burst out with something and he looked up then hummed. "He isn't one to just hang out..."

"Shame," Yakan murmured, a far off look on his face for a moment.

Die snorted. "You're like a love-sick puppy, you know that?" He kicked his foot out, knocking the other in the shin briefly.

Yakan huffed at him and then sighed. "Yeah, well... honestly..." he rubbed his head a little and closed his eyes. "Never mind."

"Never mind, indeed." The waiter took that moment to appear and Die put in his and Kyo's order, indicating that he wanted a Caesar salad and French onion soup along with the chicken club that Kyo had wanted, with added avocado.

Yakan ordered the Rueben and a large order of fries for them to share, requesting them to come as soon as possible. Then he ordered a bottle of wine and three glasses.

As soon as the waiter was gone, Die chanced sliding his hand onto Kyo's thigh, rubbing lightly at it in an almost absent fashion, smirking. "God... I think we made Shinya super uncomfortable tonight, huh?"

Yakan let out a very undignified snort. "Yeah, that we very much did. Shame he had to move seats... I really wish he hadn't."

"I bet not," Die murmured quietly.

Kyo raised an eyebrow as he listened to Yakan fan-boy over Shinya. He opened his mouth to inform Yakan that he was most definitely not Shinya's type in any fashion, but then shut it. He kinda felt sorry for the guy because it would be unrequited love for sure, given that Shinya had confessed his desire for Nora. He glanced over at Die, smoothly shifting his hand to his lap to place over Die's for a brief moment. "Shin tends to feel intimidated when he's put on the spot," he offered quietly, shrugging his shoulder.

Die nodded. "Truth, he speaks it." He looked up when the waiter came back, shifting forward to hide his and Kyo's hands. He watched as the man opened the wine, poured Yakan a little bit and let him try it before pouring three glasses and leaving the bottle on the table for them from that point forward.

Die swallowed a little and then took the glass of wine with a soft thanks, relenting to it because it would be rude not to accept it at this point. He took a sip and then put the glass down, running his hand through his hair instead. "So what were we planning on talking about next week?"

"I was thinking we might toss in something about the political issues with Korea... maybe something about the newer fashion trends, and perhaps something about the male tenga? I mean the fans really wanted that right?"

Die choked slightly on air at the last part. "Yakan, I swear to god, do not put me on the spot like that again!" He shifted a little, incredibly uncomfortable with the whole idea of the talking about sex in any fashion with the fans watching.

Kyo watched his lover carefully with the wine and almost smiled when Die only took a little sip then set it down on the table. He was handed a glass as well and it took him a few moments to accept it, having a debate in his head about whether or not he wanted to admit to Die that he'd downed a whole thing of sake earlier. 

He bit the bullet however and took it with a nod, sipping it then damn near choking on it when Yakan mentioned male Tenga. His eyes darted to Die's face then to Yakan's, his jaw muscle twitching as he thought of how that particular episode had stuck in his mind.

Yakan chuckled. "Ah, c'mon, Die. I mean... all men masturbate... and most women, too! Doesn't the whole world know that?"

"Er... well... there's parts of it where I'm pretty sure it's religiously forbidden," Die responded quietly, picking up the glass and taking another sip. His eyes cast over to Kyo's face and noticed how his jaw tensed and he flinched slightly, looking away again. "Just... let's not. Korea is okay and fashion is fine... in fact, I think it'd be cool to do a male versus female and the grey area segment for where fashion is colliding, you know?"

Kyo snorted softly at the masturbation talk, thinking on Die's habits and even his own at times. He just shook his head though and shrugged, sipping his wine again. 

When Die attempted to pull the conversation to fashion, he glanced over and nodded his approval. "I think that'd be interesting to see... Maybe you could ask Shinya on since he's a girl anyway."

Die let out a laugh and threw his head back. Shaking his head, he tried to calm down as the waiter came back with the plate of fries and the salad from their food, leaving it on the table along with a variety of dips and dressings for both. Instantly, Die picked up the honey mustard and held it up. "This one?"

Kyo let the corners of his mouth quirk up as Die laughed, his hand squeezing his lover's before letting go once the waiter returned. He examined the bottle then nodded, grabbing a plate to dish out a small portion of the salad. "Works for me..."

Die waited on Kyo to get his portion of the salad out and then moved to get his portion, pushing the rest over to Yakan. He poured some dressing on his salad and then passed it over to Kyo. After a moment, he licked his lips a little bit and then portioned off a small bit of fries, giving himself barbeque sauce and some ketchup to choose between. "Hnn," he offered quietly, starting to eat with obvious gusto.

Kyo took his portion of fries, then pushed those towards Yakan as well before digging in, finding the combo of healthy salad mixed with greasy fries somewhat amusing in his near tipsy state. So much so that he let out a half giggle, half snort as he thought about it then quickly covered his mouth, looking rather embarrassed.

Instantly Die's eyes were on Kyo, the giggle tipping him off. He stared at his lover for a few seconds, deducting a few things along the way. The giggle, the slight flush on Kyo's cheeks, the glassy look to his eyes. "Oh my god," he murmured under his breath, and then grinning, "you're drunk." Looking completely amused, he licked his lips and then popped a fry into his mouth, chewing and swallowing. He chuckled and then leaned across right into Yakan's personal space, grabbing the salt and shaking some onto his fries, holding it out in front of Kyo. "Yes or no?"

Kyo simply responded by kicking what he was pretty sure Die's leg under the table then nodding to the offer of salt, taking the shaker and sprinkling some lightly on his fries before eating one. After, he washed it down with a drink of wine, slowly forgetting why he thought he shouldn't have accepted wine in the first place. He swallowed then leaned towards Die slightly while looking at Yakan. "So, are you as much of a banana as Die?"

Die let out a soft laugh, shaking his head a tad.

Yakan looked up at the other and then cocked his head to the side. "Umm... banana?" he asked, looking sincerely confused for a moment. Then he leaned forward, "You mean, if I'm gay?" He pushed his hand up under his jaw and smirked a little at Kyo. "I'd think the answer to that would be a bit obvious."

Kyo looked at Yakan for a moment then let out a real laugh, shaking his head. "Well, yeah, but no, that's not what I meant..." He licked his lips and nudged Die. "A banana... think about it. Yellow out, white within..."

"O-oh!" Yakan responded, chuckling a little. "Mmm... not that I'm aware of?" He shrugged slightly and looked perplexed. "Wait... Die?" he looked over at him.

Die arched his eyebrow slightly and then shrugged. "What he means is like... I guess I pick up a lot of American customs and keep them as my own, you know? Like... flannel shirts, American food..." he glanced at Kyo and then at Yakan, and it hit him suddenly. "Oh my god... the personal space! The shaking of hands, things like that!"

Yakan looked between the two and then started laughing. "Oh. Well... um..." he popped a fry into his mouth, chewed, and swallowed. "I guess I have picked up a few things that are less... conventional. So, a little bit?"

Kyo was outright laughing at this point as it looked like Yakan was having some kind of revelation. "Yes, exactly...that." He snickered behind his head, taking a bite of salad.

Die tilted his head a little bit and then shook it slightly, having nothing to really say about what all had transpired in all honesty. He just had the modesty to at least look embarrassed.

Yakan, on the other hand, was looking somewhat dazed and puffed out his cheeks. After a moment, he examined Kyo and then whispered out, "Oh my god... did... did I make you mad? I seriously did not mean to ever offend you by... by being... like.... _that_!"

Kyo glanced at Die then back to Yakan before nearly choking on his salad. He dropped his gaze to his plate, shifting uncomfortably now, pressing himself back in the seat a bit. His jaw was clenched as he remember some of the awful things he'd screamed at Die, guilt coiling in his stomach. He didn't respond, but picked up his glass of wine, nearly downing it instead.

Yakan stared at Kyo for a long few moments, watching him pick up the wine and down it quickly. He frowned a bit and then sighed. "Shit... Kyo..." he murmured, "I am so fucking sorry."

Die glanced between the pair, feeling more and more awkward by the moment. He shifted slightly in his seat and bowed his head, looking more than a little bit upset.

Yakan's eyes flickered to Die as well and his mouth opened slightly. "Oh no..." he managed to get out, "I... I am so sorry." This time his voice was solemn.

Kyo sat there for a moment, listening to Yakan apologizing. It made him ill. Yakan had done no wrong and was obviously clueless. Even Die had not been at fault. Kyo's jealousy had simply consumed him and he'd acted like a royal jackass, nearly ripping him and Die apart. He finally glanced up at Yakan and shook his head. "No, Yakan, do not apologize. It was entirely my misunderstanding."

"No... I mean... I really should keep my hands to myself, it's just... I don't do it on purpose, its subconscious at this point." He shrugged a little. "If it helps... it's not Die I'm attracted to." He glanced over at Die, his eyes going wide. "I don't mean to say you're not attractive, but... uh... just... not my type!" He sounded slightly panicked, trying to backtrack on himself.

Kyo poured himself another glass of wine then drank half of it before sighing softly. "No, I get it… because Die's just as touchy feely... you're both atypical Japanese men in that regard." He flicked his eyes to Die then reached over, taking his hand and squeezing it. "As for attractiveness, of course he's attractive and I get it. Fan-girls and boys are gonna faun over him and stuff all the time and there's nothing I can do to stop that... I just have to learn to chill out and remember that I trust Die."

Die let out a tiny laugh at Yakan's response and then shrugged a little bit. "Mmm... no offense taken or anything," he murmured softly. He reached to gently run his fingers through Kyo's hair for a moment before pulling back.

Kyo's eyes slid partly closed when Die's fingers went through his hair. He was truly drunk now, having drank that last half glass of wine quickly and now on his third... or was it fourth… glass after all the sake earlier. He let out a sigh, feeling the familiar feeling of haziness wash over him as his brain suddenly decided coherent thought was unnecessary. "So... Yakan... Shinya-chan, eh?"

Die watched Kyo's reaction, reading it as him being drunk. He licked his lips a little bit and then dropped his hand down to get ahold of Kyo's hand under the table. Their food arrived before Yakan could speak and Die hid his and Kyo's linked hands under the edge of the table. The wait staff moved off and Die squeezed Kyo's hand, unwilling to let it go, reaching for his spoon for the soup.

Yakan sat there, looking slightly out of place before the other finally got to the point of remembering that he had to answer. He sighed softly and then nodded, a blush staining his cheeks as he looked away. "Yes, Kyo... the answer is yes… him."

Kyo squeezed Die's hand tightly, scooting over a bit when their food came. When Die didn't release his hand, he shrugged and smiled a little, simply picking up one half of his sandwich and taking a little bite. "Mm..." 

He looked over at Yakan and nodded slightly. "Obvious... though probably not to Shin..." He bit his lip and looked at Die. How would they break it to Yakan that Shinya was enamored with Nora at the moment? "Maa, why are things so sticky?!"

Die stared at Kyo for a long few moments before letting go of his hand and reaching for the sandwich to cut it so they could share it. "Um... well... if your hands are sticky, you should probably wash."

Yakan let out a little embarrassed laugh and shook his head slightly.

Kyo raised an eyebrow. "My hands… aren't sticky. That's not what I was referring to, Die." He huffed out a breath then looked at Yakan. "So..." He trailed off, failing to think of anything meaningful to say after that. Instead, he turned back to his sandwich now that Die had cut it. He took a bite and chewed it, quietly looking between Die and Yakan as if trying to prompt them to start a different conversation.

Die cleared his throat and then licked his lips a little bit. "Mmm... well... uh... this... is incredibly awkward." He sighed.

Yakan shook his head a little and then murmured, "Sticky... as in the words and the conversation, Die." He picked up his wine glass and then took a quiet sip of it.

Kyo hummed and focused on his food, trying to get something in him to soak up all the booze before it had an adverse effect on him. After a while, he finally looked back up and cleared his throat. "So, Yakan, since I know Daisuke can't keep things to himself... what do you think of our new album so far?" 

Yakan glanced over at Die and then back to Kyo and laughed softly. "Mmm... well... it happens." He sniffed a little. "I really liked the songs so far, honestly."

Kyo nodded then shifted in his seat, leaning towards Die a bit. "Good... so I know that at least one person likes it." He laughed a little, shaking his head.

Die gave Kyo a little smile. "You've got to know so many more will love it! Seriously, Kyo... stop worrying so much!"

Yakan shook his head a little bit. "Your music is always amazing."

Kyo huffed then grinned at Yakan. "You're only saying that because you have a crush on Shin and a friend crush on Die."

"Hey!" both of them simultaneously let out. Yakan glanced at Die, Die glanced at Yakan, and then the pair sighed softly, shaking their heads a little. 

Kyo stared at them then burst out laughing. He couldn't seem to get a hold of himself after that and eventually ended up clutching his side as he tried desperately to quit giggling. "I... oh God... haa..."

Yakan simply looked shocked. But Die looked half-amused and half-freaked-out. He shifted closer to Kyo and pursed his lips a little bit. "Shit," he hissed out quietly, "how much have you had?"

Kyo finally got himself under control and looked over at Die, blinking a little then clearing his throat. "Hnn... three or four? And the sake..." He looked from Die to Yakan and then back, frowning. "Er... noticeable?"

Die huffed out a laugh. "Beyond... you're drunk." He reached to pat Kyo's leg and then glanced at Yakan. "Let's... finish eating, yeah?"

Kyo shook his head, sniffing a little then going back to his food though now he was picking at it, eating the crust of his sandwich slowly. His mind tended to become hyper focused on things while under the influence and currently it was wondering why people didn't eat their crusts. "Hnn..." 

Die eyed Kyo for a long moment and then glanced at Yakan, raising his eyebrow.

For his part, Yakan was watching Kyo with a fascinated look on his face, his eyes flicking to Die every once in a while, a small smirk playing around his lips. 

Kyo shifted a bit in his seat, sighing softly then looking up at Yakan, raising an eyebrow. "What? You look like you've seen a unicorn..." He grinned, pushing his plate away and reaching for his water, taking a sip then resting his hand on Die's knee.

Yakan chuckled softly. "It is novel... a drunk Kyo is rather like a unicorn, I think." He put his chin on his hand and smirked.

Die chuckled. "Mmm... I think he's drinking for me these days... we'll share the booze... or something like that."

Kyo laughed and shook his head. "It seems to be... a new thing. Just maybe... stress, hm?" He sniffed then looked at Die, letting his eyes rove over his lover's jawline then smirking a little, his mind shifting to focus on something else. 

Die watched Kyo, tilting his head a little bit and then flicking his eyes to Yakan. He wanted desperately to kiss Kyo, to drag him off home and have his way with his drunken, horny lover. Because Kyo had been damn clear last time that he got hornier when he was drunk. All he could think about was what he wanted to do, what he wanted to touch and feel and experience. Clearing his throat, he shifted slightly in his seat, quickly finishing up his meal and then putting his spoon down. "I um... hate to cut this short, but..." he trailed off.

Yakan chuckled slightly and nodded. "Trust me... I understand." He tossed down money for all of his part and then stood up. "I'll leave you two to this. Have a wonderful night and," he reached out to Kyo, "it's been a pleasure meeting you after all this time."

Kyo smirked at Die then looked at Yakan, reaching out to take his hand, shaking it before grabbing up the money he threw down and pressed it back into his palm. "Indeed and... it's our pleasure..." He grinned then turned to Die, bumping his hip with his own.

Yakan looked surprised and then quietly put his money away. "Okay. Well... thank you so very much!" He licked his lips a little bit and then bowed his head slightly and waved to them, heading on his way outside.

Die bid the other man a goodnight as well and smiled at Kyo's reaction to the money, taking out what was needed to pay the bill, noting it had been left sitting there by the waiter. He glanced over at Kyo and reached under the table to grope him for a moment before letting go and sliding out of the booth. He leaned over to pick up his bag and murmured, "I'm gonna do the dirtiest things with you tonight..."

Kyo waved to Yakan then had to bite his lip hard to keep from moaning out loud, his hips jerking up so fast that he hit his knee on the table. He let out a shuddering breath then looking at Die with lust and alcohol glazed eyes, murmuring lowly, "Fuck, baby... yes _please_..." He scooted out and stood, taking a moment to catch his balance.

Die gently placed his hand on Kyo's elbow and then guided him toward the exit. He handed Kyo his sunglasses and let him put them on for a little bit of dignity should someone catch this moment and choose to share it on the internet.

Kyo gratefully took Die's sunglasses, sliding them on then followed Die out, wobbling slightly here and there. Okay, so maybe he shouldn't have had all that sake by himself and then accepted the wine as well.

Pushing out into the cool night air, he glanced toward the parking lot, remembering Kyo's car was there. He debated his own sobriety and realized he was fine to drive, not even having finished his glass of wine. Leading Kyo to the car, he poured him into the passenger seat, fully confiscated his keys and slid into the driver's seat. He buckled up and then glanced at Kyo. "Seatbelt. And then open your pants and take out your cock."

Kyo huffed out a slightly annoyed breath as a pebble on the ground tried to best him, finding himself thankful when they reached his car and he was placed inside, mostly with Die's help. He glanced over at his lover when he spoke and groaned, quickly doing up his seatbelt then getting his pants open, pulling out his already half-hard cock. He gave himself a couple of strokes, flicking his thumb over the piercing there, letting out a sigh of pleasure. "Hnng, baby... gonna take advantage of my drunken state?"

Die started the car and then backed out of the parking space, navigating the car onto the road and starting down the thankfully mostly empty streets due to the time of the night. "Hnn... it's not taking advantage if you want it." He glanced at Kyo and then back at the road. "Do you want it?"

Kyo licked his lips, smirking a little as he gave his cock a few hard jerks, his hips coming up off the seat as he did. "O-oh, _yes_... I want it... want you."

"How many times do you think you can cum, baby?" He licked his lips a little bit as they stopped at a stoplight. He glanced around to make sure they weren't stopped beside anyone else and then reached over and grasped Kyo's cock, jerking him harshly for a few moments. "Fuck. I'm getting so hard, feel me."

Kyo opened his mouth to respond, but ended up dropping his head back and crying out softly as Die jerked his cock. "F-fuck..." He shifted and reached over, cupping his lover's crotch, rubbing his palm over him, feeling him getting harder. "Gods, Die... at least three..."

Die's hips lifted up off the seat a little to push his cock against Kyo's hand. "Christ," he bit out, having to let go of Kyo once he realized the light was green. He put his hand back on the wheel and settled on the seat once again. "Jerk off for me, baby... bring yourself super close and stop. Then work it back up again." He flicked a glance sideways at Kyo. "Edge for me." His tongue slipped out, flicking over his lips a few times before he slid it back in his mouth. "Been wanting to see you do this for me..."

Kyo gave Die a final hard squeeze then settled back in his seat, shifting a bit so that he was turned towards Die more. He worked up some spit and hunched over, letting it drop from his mouth to his cock then starting to smear it around the head, playing with his piercing for a long moment then finally moving to stroking himself. "Hnng... yeah..."

Die was glad there was a stop sign the moment Kyo started to drool on his own dick. He stared at him with his mouth agape for a long moment and then shivered. "Dear god in fucking heaven," he murmured, shaking his head, and then turning to pay attention to the road.

Kyo smirked over at his lover, his hips bucking up into his hand as he became more vigorous with his actions, his hand a blur, his balls already drawn up tight. "Ah... fuck..." He continued for another moment then stopped, pulling his hand away, his cock bobbing slightly as it twitched. He took a few breaths, calming himself enough to go back to stroking, starting slower this time then ramping it up, his other hand moving to push under his shirt, tweaking his nipple hard. "Die... fuck..."

Die's cock was raging hard by that point, his entire body humming with the desperate desire to fuck. He whined slightly and then made the last turn toward their home. "Cum," he hissed out as he pulled up to the final stop sign and glanced over at Kyo, watching his lover pleasure himself in the passenger seat. It was truly a sight to behold.

Kyo moaned and shifted, letting more spit drop onto his cock before he pushed his hips up, all out fucking his hand for a moment then stilling as he began to cum, painting his dashboard with spurt after spurt of his offering. "Die... I... oh _fuck_!!"

Die couldn't even begin to stand it any longer, he wanted his lover with every single fiber of his being right then. He groaned as he pulled out from the stop sign and made the final length of the drive, one hand on the wheel, one hand frantically grabbing his cock through his pants, his desire too huge to keep himself completely together.

He pulled into the driveway and cut the engine, yankied off his belt buckle and all but ripped open his pants, taking his cock out and jerking off frantically, his cock so hard it was almost ridiculous, the head ruddy with his desire. "Kyo," he gasped out, "Oh god I'm so goddamned horny!"

Kyo sunk back in the seat after his orgasm, panting, his head swimming slightly. "Hnng..." He sat there until they pulled into their driveway then turned, watching Die frantically freeing his cock. He groaned and unbuckled, leaning over and taking Die into his mouth without much warning, giving him a hard suck then swirling his tongue around the head.

The instant Kyo was in his lap, his mouth sinking down over his cock, he let go of it and instead put his hand in Kyo's hair. "Oh my god," he breathed out, his head hitting the back of the seat. "Kyo..." his voice rang with intensity, his entire body completely on edge for the whole thing, his eyes rolling back in his head as he arched up toward him. "So close... so fucking close."

Kyo moaned around his lover's cock, intensely aroused by his desperation. He debated for a half a second then lifted his head, flicking his tongue over the tip again before taking the whole length of Die's cock down his throat, swallowing repeatedly around him, moaning as he did so.

Die let out a sharp cry as Kyo's actions only managed to shove him closer to the edge. His fingers tightened in his lover's hair and he whispered out, "Here it is, baby... all for you," as his hips arched up from the seat and the first wave of his orgasm crashed into him, the spurt of his cum hitting Kyo's tongue a second later. "Ah, yeah~!" He let out a groan as he continued to cum, pulsing out his hot offering into Kyo's mouth.

Kyo groaned, relaxing his throat as Die orgasmed, eagerly swallowing every drop... except the last bit. He pulled back just in time to let the last spurt of Die's cum hit him full on in the face, painting his lips and cheek with it. He gave the head of Die's dick a lick then sat back, smirking at him.

Die sat there for a moment, sort of deflating into the seat and letting out a soft whine as he stared at Kyo's face and how he'd gotten one spurt of cum full across his mouth and up on his cheek. "Is it wrong that I love that you get horny like this when you're drunk?" He laughed softly. "You give the best blowjobs like this!"

Kyo chuckled softly, leaning against the seat, licking at his lips. "Hnn, maybe... maybe not..." He grinned then reached up wiping Die's cum from his cheek, licking it from his fingers as well.

Die leaned over, catching Kyo's lips with his own, his tongue sliding out to carefully remove bits of his own cum from his lover's mouth. He settled back and did up his pants quickly. "Get your pants done up before you get out." He grabbed a handful of napkins from the console and wiped up what Kyo had gotten on the dash, thinking the other would probably not enjoy having that there tomorrow.

Kyo hummed against Die's lips, smirking when the other cleaned him off a bit. He shifted back and tucked his cock away, zipping but not bothering with his belt. He got out and stood beside the car, shifting a little.

Die got out as well, closing the door and locking up the car. He came around and offered Kyo his arm. Once he'd led them up to the house and opened the door, he ushered Kyo inside and closed the door, latching it as well. He leaned back against it and stared at his lover, suddenly looking very shy as he stared at Kyo as though he had something he wanted to ask but was almost ashamed.

After a few more moments, he finally opened his mouth. "Do you have to piss like last time?"

Kyo took Die's arm gratefully, feeling more than a little wobbly, especially after cumming. He moved inside and began taking his shoes off, pausing when his lover spoke. He smirked a little, finishing up then looking at Die, cocking his head as if he were considering it. "Mmm, kinda... not a lot yet..."

Die pursed his lips slightly and then nodded, stooping down to take off his own shoes, ensuring he removed his socks as well. Once he was back up on his feet, he offered Kyo his arm again. He led the way upstairs and then into the bathroom where he leaned over and started to run them a bath, filling it with some nice oils and some of the bubble bath that he refused to admit he even had. Kyo followed along with Die, the alcohol wearing off some, but his brain was still floating. He moved into the bathroom then sat on the counter, watching his lover prepare a bath, a slight smirk on his lips. "Mmm, thought we were gonna get dirty... not clean..."

Die flicked his gaze up to Kyo. "Do not underestimate the bath," he replied, finally righting himself and pulling off his shirt, tossing it in the hamper and then taking the items out of his pants pockets and off his wrists and placing them on the counter. Finally, he ditched his pants into the hamper as well and put his belt on the counter.

Kyo let out a laugh then watched his lover undress, humming softly as his body was revealed. "You're so fucking gorgeous, you know that?" 

Moving to Kyo, he reached to pull his shirt off as well, tossing it in the dirty clothing, and then helped him remove his jewelry as well, tugging his belt off before stepping back to let Kyo down from the counter, ready to catch him if he needed it. 

The vocalist grinned and let Die undress him before scooting off the counter, accidentally on purpose falling forward against Die's body, his hands going to grip his lover's biceps. He couldn't help the twitch of his lips as he stared up at Die. "Oops..."

Die chuckled a little, catching Kyo and drawing him close to him. "You little shit," he purred out, "I love you so goddamned much!" He leaned in to catch his mouth, kissing him deeply, and then groaning softly as he pulled back from it and unfastened Kyo's pants, letting them fall in a puddle around his feet. "C'mon, love."

Kyo laughed, kissing Die back then stepping out of his pants. "Mm, love you, too..." He grinned and made his way over to the bath, testing the temperature with his hand before stepping in and carefully sitting down, groaning as he slid into the water.

Die turned off the water and then climbed into the tub as well, settling down across from Kyo, one long leg stretching out to slide his foot over Kyo's leg, a smirk on his lips as he picked up a handful of bubbles and blew them toward his lover.

Kyo watched Die settle in the bath, grinning at him, reaching down to run his hand over his lover's ankle. He laughed softly as bubbles blew his way, scooping up a handful and lobbing them in Die's general direction.

Die ducked and then shook his head, tilting his head back and laughing. This was so freeing, Kyo being happy and all the burden of his image slipping off completely in these moments. It was like who he'd once remembered seeing years and years before, back when they'd first come together within the confines of another band.

Leaning his head back up, he watched Kyo as he slid his foot up over Kyo's inner thigh and slowly higher, seeing how Kyo would react.

Kyo chuckled lightly, leaning back against the edge of the tub, sighing. He was still buzzing from the alcohol, but just being with Die like this made him grin from ear-to-ear. He opened his mouth to say something about it, but Die's foot was currently invading his personal space and he squirmed flicking his eyes down at it before smirking a little. 

Die let out a quiet laugh and then pushed his foot up over Kyo's balls and then lightly ran his toes over the other's length for a moment before pushing his foot up onto Kyo's abdomen and lightly pushing with the pad of his foot. "Hnn," he let out for no particular reason.

Kyo grunted softly, pushing against Die's foot for a moment then settling back. "Mn..." He shifted, moving closer to Die, sitting in his lap and nuzzling against his neck for a moment. "You know... warm water really relaxes me..."

"Mmm... it's supposed to do that, love." He allowed the other to move, dropping his foot out of the way and chuckling once Kyo was firmly planted in his lap, his arms coming around him. "Hi there, Mr. Affectionate." He kissed over his Damned tattoo and nuzzled in a little.

Kyo laughed then tilted his head, stroking his hand through Die's hair. "Mm, just warming you up..."

"Warming me up?" He chuckled a little bit and then ran his hand over Kyo's back, pressing bubbles on him and then nipping slightly at his neck. "You know... I always want to ravage you, but at times like this, I want to do it even more." He laughed softly and then nipped again.

Kyo smirked, shifting around in Die's lap, letting out a little moan. "Then what are you waiting for?"

"Mmm... I'm not waiting, I'm being slow, my lovely." He slid both hands down and grasped Kyo's ass, squeezing lightly. "Do you think you can fuck me while you're drunk?" he asked softly.

Kyo chuckled softly and turned to catch Die's lips in a long, languid kiss before pulling back and smirking at his lover. "Mm, not so drunk now… so... yes..."

Die licked at his lover's lower lip and then pulled back just enough to nuzzle noses with him before squeezing his ass again. "Mmm... good, because I want your cock up my ass sometime tonight. Are we clear?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose cutely then shifted around in Die's lap, facing him, pushing back against his hands. "Very. I have no problem pounding your sweet, tight ass."

"Damn straight!" Die leaned up and lightly nipped the tip of Kyo's nose before he reached past Kyo and grasped the loofah, scooping up bubbles with it and then starting to rub over the other's body.

Kyo laughed a little then sighed, letting his lover loofah him. "Mmm, yes, exfoliate me..."

Die burst out laughing, shaking his head. "Jesus fuck, Kyo... how much did you say you had?"

Kyo grinned widely at Die then shrugged. "I don't remember anymore, baby..." He squirmed around until his back was to Die. "Gentle on the ink, darling."

"Always," Die murmured, gently running the loofah around in circles on Kyo's skin, enjoying that he was allowed to do such things to the other man. This never really got old for him and he loved that fact more than anything. 

Kyo hummed and slumped forward a little, closing his eyes as Die scrubbed his back. After a while, he shifted back, grasping Die' wrist to pull it around him, leaning back against his lover's chest. "Mm, baby, touch me?"

Die chuckled a little, dropping the loofah and sliding his hand around Kyo's front, lightly running his nails over Kyo's stomach and then reaching down to grasp his cock. "Like this?"

Kyo let out a sound and leaned back further, spreading his legs a little. "Mm, yeah, just like that... I love the way your hand feels on my cock."

"Hnn," Die murmured as he began to softly suck on Kyo's shoulder, making sure he wasn't leaving any marks. He didn't need any questions or more so, he didn't need any accusing glances from fellow bandmates... or the public wondering why Kyo was flaunting a bruise.

Kyo brought his hand up to push through Die's hair, rolling his hips up slightly. He wasn't in a rush to get to the finish line, just simply enjoying what Die was doing to him. "Daisuke... you bring me so much pleasure."

Die moved his hand lightly over the other's length, getting him fully hard and then just let his touch be feather-light and teasing rather than anything else. He let out a soft sound and shivered slightly.

Kyo let out a groan then turned his head, pressing his lips to the side of Die's mouth. "You're awfully quiet... tell me what you want from me."

Die let out a soft grunt and then shrugged slightly, his hand still working lightly over Kyo's cock. "This," he murmured quietly, pressing his face against Kyo's neck and flicking his tongue out a few times.

Kyo sighed softly, pushing his hips up some, desire starting to overcome him. "Mm, just this, baby?" He, of course, would accept whatever his lover needed and if he wanted it this way, he was fine with that.

Die's lower lip disappeared into his mouth as he sucked on it for a moment and then he released it, his thumb playing along the head of Kyo's cock for the time being. He really did want more, but it wouldn't work with Kyo not having to piss right then... and besides, he was embarrassed beyond belief about it anyway, so that made it harder to ask for. His earlier bluntness had managed to fly away.

Kyo watched his lover's face in the mirror over the tub, seeing some hidden desire there, something that Die so obviously wanted but was holding back on. He huffed softly and reached down, gently pulling Die's hand away and turning around to face him. He cupped his lover's cheek and leaned in to kiss Die deeply. "Baby... what is it, hm? I know you're thinking of something..."

There were times in Die's life that he almost wanted to strangle Kyo for being so damn observant. Of course, he didn't _actually_ want to hurt his lover, but the annoyance of not being able to hide anything from him was sincerely frustrating. He sighed softly and tilted his head back. "Not right now, please? I just want tonight to be amazing."

Kyo blinked a little then simply nodded, pecking Die's chin. "Okay, baby... c'mon... let's get out." He shifted back to do a quick wash of necessary areas then stood, grabbing a towel, only feeling slightly off balance now as he stepped out of the tub to dry off, peering at his lover as he did.

Die quickly washed up and then slid out of the bath, unplugging the tub so it could drain before he got fully out. He grabbed a towel and slid it around his body, moving to quickly dry himself off, flicking a glance at Kyo and offering him a soft smile.

Kyo patted himself dry then dropped the towel in the hamper before leaning against the counter and watching Die. He smiled back at him then reached down, running his hand over his still hard length, sighing with pleasure.

Die smirked at Kyo as he moved past him and wandered off toward the bedroom, crooking a finger at him to follow along. "C'mon then..."

Kyo followed along, moving into their bedroom and flopping down on the bed, cock bobbing slightly.

Die tossed his own towel to the side and glanced over at Kyo before opening the top dresser drawer and removing his sounding rod kit. He pulled out the slimmest one and then came over to the bed, settling down before fishing the lube out from under the pillow. For the time being, he just held the rod, tossing the lube on the pillow next to him and then turned toward Kyo. "How do you want this?" he asked softly.  
Kyo watched Die with curiosity then lust as he spotted the sounding kit. He licked his lips and sat up, reaching out for the rod. "Let me sound you, Die."

Flushing slightly, he held out the sounding rod to Kyo and pushed the lube closer to him. He flopped back and reached down to start trying to get his cock to come back to hardness, knowing it was far easier to do this when he was hard than when he wasn't. "Just make sure you lube it good."

Kyo smiled softly and took the rod and lube, smearing a good amount on it then reaching out with his other hand, wrapping his fingers around Die's cock, stroking him. "Of course..."

Die let go of his cock and then just put his hands behind his head, closing his eyes and waiting on it, loving the feeling of this and knowing it'd be even better not knowing when exactly it was coming and then having Kyo doing it for him. "Just so we're clear... I tend to cum fast and hard with this," he breathed out, "but I'm always good for a second go directly after." And he was sure this would be no exception.

Kyo hummed softly, stroking Die lightly then taking the rod and teasing the tip of Die's cock with it, just barely pushing it in the slit. "Mm, well I have plans for you... so..." He left it at that and focused on the task at hand, grasping Die's cock and carefully guiding the sounding rod down the shaft, his eyes flicking from there to Die's face.

Die's breath caught the moment the other touched him with the sounding rod. His heart raced in his chest and his legs twitched a little, his body wanting to move and his mind quite clear that that was not allowed during sounding. He let out a groan as the rod slid deep inside him, filling him on the inside and making his head swim with the intensity of it. "Oh fuck..." His voice wavered slightly, one of his arms moving from behind his head, his hand reaching for the comforter to grasp it harshly, pleasure washing over him.

Kyo watched Die's reaction, groaning lowly as he slid the rod fully into place. He held it in place and used his other hand to lightly stroke Die. "Gorgeous..."

Die let out a soft sigh of pleasure, closing his eyes and trying so hard not to arch into the other's touch. "God, Kyo... please... move it!"

Kyo shifted a little then grasped the rod, sliding it out halfway before pushing it back in, his other hand holding Die's length still. "Like this?"

"Yes," Die gasped out, "just like that." His other hand moved to grasp his own hair, pulling slightly as he whined, his thighs quivering with the desire to push upward, the need to get closer to what he was receiving from the other.

Kyo licked his lips and pulled the rod free, adding a bit more lube then sliding it back down Die's shaft. He carefully stroked his lover's cock as he slid the rod in and out, watching the pleasure etched on Die's face. "Fuck you're gorgeous like this. So damn close to losing your control..."

Die tugged again on his own hair and whined softly, closing his eyes and finally giving in and lightly pushing his hips up once he was sure Kyo was just stroking his cock and holding the rod almost still for a moment. He settled again once Kyo began pushing the rod in and out of his cock. "So good," he breathed out.

Kyo grinned, slipping his hand down to cup and squeeze Die's sac, pushing the rod in and then holding it in place with his thumb, leaning down to flick his tongue over Die's nipple. He nipped the bud then pulled back, moving his hand to brush over Die's taint lightly.

Die gasped as Kyo licked over his nipple and slid his finger over his taint. The combination of so many sensations was putting him completely on edge. "Oh god, I'm gonna cum," he breathed out, his hips arching involuntarily.

Kyo smirked and slid the rod out then back in, barely moving it as he pushed his hand further back, toying with Die's entrance. "Then cum, baby."

Die's hips flexed up and stayed there, his thigh quivering as he neared his end. "Faster... god fuck me with it faster."

Kyo groaned and did as Die asked, taking the rod and sliding in and out quickly, being careful to not go too far or pull it completely out. "Gods, Die..."

It didn't take but a few more thrusts before Die cried out, his hips pushing up as he lost it. His back arched, his head falling back, his mouth open in a silent scream. It was obvious he was cumming, but nothing was coming out as of yet.

Kyo watched Die's body contort as he came, his hand holding the rod still as he brought the other to stroke over his lover's tightened abdomen. After a moment, he carefully pulled the rod free, setting it aside.

The moment the rod came free of Die's cock, his cum began to flow out and down his shaft, which was still quite obviously achingly hard. His hips jerked a few times and he groaned, his hands clawing at the sheets. "Oh god, Kyo, get over here and fucking ride me."

Kyo watched Die's cum leak from his cock then smirked, reaching out to stroke his lover a couple of times, smearing the mess over his length. "Mm, gladly," he murmured as he straddled Die's lap, reaching back to steady Die's length before sliding down on it with a groan. "Oh, Die... _fuck_!"

The moment Kyo's body surrounded his cock, Die cried out, his hands coming to grasp at his lover's hips. "Oh fuck!" he cried out, his hips immediately jerking upward. He began to thrust up into him, whimpering slightly as the sensations began to overwhelm him.

Kyo groaned, rocking his hips, pushing Die's cock further into his body, his own length bobbing against his stomach. He brought his hands up to rest on Die's ribcage, steadying himself as Die fucked him.

Die groaned, throwing his head back and arching upward. "Shit!" he cried out, his hips jerking almost violently. "So good! Feel so.... ah!"

Kyo leaned down, lifting his hips then slamming them back down, crying out as Die's cock hit his prostate. He shifted and did it again, shuddering as his cock leaked pre-cum.

"Dear god in fucking heaven," Die let out, grabbing Kyo around the waist and abruptly rolling them over, positioning himself where he was pretty much lying on the other, his hips humping forward frantically, as though he had very little control over what he was doing right then. "Oh fucking hell!" It was so obvious he was losing it quickly, his earlier words about how crazy sounding drove him incredibly obvious.

Kyo grunted softly when he was flipped over, but instantly adjusted and wrapped his leg around Die's waist, bucking his hips upward. He reached up and dragged his nails lightly down Die's back, moaning. "Die!"

Die's breath began coming out in harsher pants, his desperation seeping off of him like the sweat that would have been there if he sweated like a normal person. He let out a loud whine and jerked his hips harder a few times before crying out something even he couldn't understand, his cock pulsing as he shot his offering inside the other.

Kyo shuddered as Die reached his end, the feeling of his lover's hot cum coating his insides making him moan. He clamped down around his lover then relaxed, rocking his hips slightly, using his body to milk his lover. "Fuck... Die..."

Die lay there over him, panting slightly and shivering at the pure idea of what he'd done. He sighed softly and then leaned down to nuzzle at him. "How do you want this, Kyo?"

Kyo slipped his arms around Die, stroking over his back then leaning up to kiss his lover's lips. "Mm, thought you said you wanted my cock in your ass..." He smirked, giving Die's hair a tug.

"I do," Die murmured softly, "if... you want it that way." Sometimes even he had no idea what was going on, honestly. He felt like he was wavering on the line of dominating and submissive, uncertain what side he was actually standing on half the time.

Kyo chuckled softly, kissing Die's lips again. "Baby, you're adorable when you're indecisive... now prep yourself..."

Die shifted finally, pulling himself up, his cock slipping free of Kyo's passage. He settled back on his knees and picked up the lube, slowly pouring some on his fingers. Then he licked his lips and slid his fingers down to rub at his entrance, slowly sliding one finger into himself.

Kyo groaned when Die pulled free of him, his hand sliding down to brush over his achingly hard cock. He shifted so that he was sitting up, watching Die begin to finger himself.

Die pursed his lips a little bit and shivered slightly. Swallowing a bit, he pushed a second finger in and let out a quiet huff of breath as both slid inside his body. "Ah yeah," he sighed out.

Kyo started stroking himself slowly as he watched Die, smirking a little. "This is better than porn..." He flicked his thumb over the piercing in the head of his cock, toying with it with a breathy moan.

Die let out a quiet laugh. "I should hope so... live show and all." He pulled his fingers free after a few more moments and then moved to lay down next to Kyo, drawing his legs up under himself and presenting his ass in the air, his cheek pressed against the pillow. "This way... take me this way."

Kyo chuckled lowly then shifted, getting on his knees and moving behind Die, stroking his hand over his lover's slightly bony hip. "Indeed..." He picked up the lube and slicked his cock up, groaning softly. He got into position, grasping his cock then pushing forward into Die's body, huffing out a sound of pleasure. "Gods..."

Die let out a little cry as the other pushed into his body. He grabbed onto the pillow in front of himself and closed his eyes, biting lightly on his lower lip. "Hnnggg," he let out.

The vocalist grasped Die's hips and began thrusting into his body, going slow at first then gradually ramping up the speed. "Gods... fuck... Die..."

Die groaned softly and pushed back toward him, clenching lightly to see if Kyo would start thrusting into him even harder if he did so.

Kyo growled at the clenching, taking it as a challenge. He hunched over Die's back and started thrusting into him harder, his breath coming in pants. Die let out a sharp whine, shivering as the other thrust into him harder. "Ah yeah! Just like that!"

Kyo shifted one leg up to give himself better leverage, pushing into Die's body hard and fast, his orgasm not far off. "Yes... Gods... yes!"

Die pushed his face into the pillow and groaned, pushing back toward Kyo so his thrusts would be harder into his body. "Fuck!" he cried out into the bed.

Kyo's nails dug into Die's hips as he fucked him, pushing in as deep and hard as he possibly could. He finally cried out then stilled within Die, spurts of his cum filling his lover's passage. "Die!!"

"Oh my god," Die breathed out, shuddering a little bit as the feeling of his lover clutching at him harsher sent him into pure bliss. "Fuck yes, fill me up!"

Kyo pushed into Die a few more times then slowly pulled out, spreading Die's cheeks and smirking. "Push it out, baby... push my cum out of your body..."

Die shivered a little bit and then flexed, pushing in such a way to make the muscles push his cum back out of his body, feeling it as it dribbled down from his ass, across his taint, and then trailed down his balls. 

Kyo watched as the sticky white fluid dribbled from Die's ass, groaning softly. He had half a mind to bend down and lap it up, but decided not to. Instead, he shifted until he was beside Die, laying down beside him then pulling his lover close, kissing him deeply. "Gods, I love you."

Die whimpered softly, sort of half falling over when the other began to kiss him. He grabbed him and pulled him closer, nuzzling in close to him and wrapping one long leg over his hip. 

Kyo curled against Die happily, looping his arm around his lover's waist, nibbling his bottom lip. He stroked his hand up and down Die's back then let out a soft sigh, closing his eyes, a smile playing on his lips.

A similar smile pulled at his own lips as he watched Kyo, licking his lips slightly as he lay there. "Gorgeous," he murmured. Kyo laughed softly, cracking open an eye then pecking Die's lips. "I could say the same about you, baby..."

Die chuckled softly. "Mmm... still drunk, sweetheart?"

Kyo had to think about it for a moment then laughed a little. "Mm, not quite... I think I worked most of it off..."

"Hnn, good." He smoothed his hand down Kyo's side and licked his lips a little bit as he closed his eyes. 

Die could tell when Kyo slid off into sleep and he found himself smiling, lightly stroking his lover's hair for a few long moments before he settled once again.


	37. Chapter 37

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

It had been a long day for Die, one spent mostly in the office, and when he finally got home, he and Kyo had simply eaten dinner and then settled on the couch, doing their own thing for the night. Sometimes it was just necessary to still do stuff separately rather than do every single little thing together.

Tonight, Die had finally decided to sit down and do a bit of searching around on the internet. First, he'd cleaned out his personal email, finding most of it to be spam, some of it to be funny things from friends, and a little bit of it to be stuff he needed to reply to. Then, he'd cleaned out his aknot email of over two hundred emails, reading each one in turn before either deleting or archiving each message.

When he'd finished with his email, he'd began going through some of his uncategorized browser links, something he liked to do every few months to get them all sorted out or deleted if they weren't useful any longer. After about an hour, he'd run across some erotica he'd been reading and picked up where he'd left off, finishing off the short story before deleting the link. The link under it told him very clearly what he'd done last time he had been reading the story, because it was a link to a very raunchy porn video... one of his favorite videos that tended to get him excited very, very quickly. He was sitting where his feet were on the couch between him and Kyo and the screen fully away from his lover, and his volume was completely turned off. He silently thanked his lucky stars as he watched the video play out in front of him, steadily becoming more and more aroused. 

The video ended and Die shut the window, carefully setting his laptop aside and getting up, doing his best to act completely innocent as he made his way down the hall to the bathroom. Once inside, he closed the door and stared at himself in the mirror for a moment, his fingertips gripping the counter in front of him. He allowed his arousal to flow through him, contorting his features into those of utter debauchery. Teeth gnawing lightly at his lower lip, he quickly unfastened his belt and then his pants, freeing his aching length.

For one moment, he just held himself in the palm of his hand, feeling how hard and warm he was, how good it felt to touch his own prick. With a tiny sigh of pleasure, he began to stroke his cock, his wrist snapping firmly over his length. Watching himself in the full-length mirror to the side, he groaned maybe a bit louder than he should have, hips jerking as he began to stroke off faster. With a little cry, he fell to his knees, his free hand knocking a glass from the counter. It shattered as it hit the floor, but for all the knowledge that he was soon to be caught for making such a sound, Die just couldn't bring himself to stop. He was far too aroused, far too into it. He _needed_ this, needed to cum, and he'd be damned if he wasn't going to paint the cabinets white before he stopped.

Kyo had pretty much been dozing all evening as he idly flipped TV channels while Die fiddled around on his computer. When the other got up, he didn't even glance up, figuring he was going take a leak since he'd been squirming a bit. It wasn't until he heard what sounded like a groan that he really paid attention, picking up the remote and muting the TV. A second later, Die cried out and he could hear the thud of his lover hitting the floor as well as glass shattering. 

Frowning, he stood and made his way to the bathroom, opening the door carefully. The sight that greeted him was _not_ what he'd been expecting in the least. There, on the floor in front of the mirror, was Die, going steadily at his obviously very hard cock. The scene went straight to his own dick, the softest groan escaping his lips. "Jesus, Die..."

Die sort of slumped back against the wall when Kyo opened the door, unable to stop jerking himself off, too desperate to finish to even remotely allow himself to stop. He turned his gaze on the other as he shifted slightly among the broken bits of glass on the floor, his hand slowing down, but still not stopping. His free hand reached for Kyo, just waving in the air, making grasping motions, his brain unable to actually focus enough for him to ask for anything in any other manner.

Kyo watched Die, watched him grasp the air like a desperate man, not even noticing he was rather close to cutting himself. Kyo stepped forward, using his foot to kick and push away the bath mat where most of the glass was then kneeled in front of his lover, thankful he was wearing jeans. "You look so desperate... so _needy_..." 

"I am," Die gasped out, finally getting ahold of Kyo's shirt. He all but ripped it from Kyo's body, pushing his hand up over the other's abs, exploring his lover as he began to jerk off faster once again. His hips bucked at the same time as his nails dug into the other's skin, pulling down across his abdomen.

Kyo grunted in response to Die practically ripping his shirt off, the act sending yet another wave of arousal to his crotch. "Ah, fuck... Die," He shifted enough to get his pants undone and then reached out, getting ahold of red hair and tugging a little harshly. 

Die took the hand in his hair to mean one thing and one thing only. A moment later, he had Kyo shoved back against the toilet, one hand on his hip, the other still working himself frantically. He pushed Kyo's pants out of the way and leaned down, taking the vocalist's cock in his mouth, immediately going in for the kill with it, giving Kyo much the same treatment he was giving himself right then, moaning around his length as he bobbed his head.

Kyo let out a loud groan as hot lips closed around his dick, his hips pushing forward into that wet heat. "Fuck yes! Suck my dick, _slut_!" 

All it took was that magical word and Die was cumming, moaning around Kyo's cock as he shot his load all over the floor in front of himself. Abandoning stroking himself, he slid his cum-slicked hand up to rub over Kyo's chest, smearing it over his nipples as he redoubled his efforts on his lover's cock.

Kyo shifted a bit so he could watch Die cum, smirking as he saw it land on some of the glass littering the floor. When slick, cum-covered fingers stroked over his chest and nipples, he groaned and grabbed them, drawing them to his mouth and sucking the mess from them. In another moment, he was letting out a cry of pleasure as he shot his load down Die's throat. 

Die hadn't been expecting Kyo to cum so fast, but when he did, he sucked it all from him in a clearly eager manner. It didn't take him long before he was crowding the other even more, reaching his hand to fist in Kyo's hair, sealing their lips together and waiting on that tongue to invade his mouth, still holding some of Kyo's cum there so his lover would taste himself; a dirty little surprise.

Kyo groaned as Die sucked him so thoroughly to the last drop. He always loved how damn eager he seemed to do a really good job. When his lover pressed their lips together, he smirked a little and slicked his tongue over Die's lips, pushing it into his waiting mouth, groaning as the flavor of himself hit his taste buds. 

Die pushed his tongue against his lover's own, groaning as he shared the cum with Kyo. He let out another soft sound and then pulled back, dark eyes sparkling as he stared down into the other's face. "Fuck," he whispered out.

Kyo moaned into the kiss, his hand coming up to stroke through Die's hair. A lewd sound left him when Die pulled back, leaving a trail of saliva and cum between them. "Fuck... indeed..." 

Die licked his lips, breaking the silvery chain that linked them, and then leaned back, his head hitting the wall, his body awkwardly arched. "Nggg..."

Kyo let out a soft huff, shifting to sit down instead of kneeling as he surveyed the damage. After a few moment, he licked his lips and glanced at Die. "Hurt yourself?" 

Die blinked a little and then looked down, finding blood on the floor. He looked slightly shocked and shifted a bit, wincing as he noticed a small shard of glass sticking out of his leg. He'd been too immersed in what he was doing to notice before, but now it started to hurt and he whined pitifully. "Fix it, Kyo."

Kyo licked his lips and moved, leaning over to look at the blood trickling from Die's leg. He examined the shard before reaching out with his fingers and carefully removing it, tossing it into the trash can. He finally had to stand, getting into the medicine cabinet to get antiseptic, ointment and a band-aid. Moving to sit next to Die again, he gently cleaned the cut then slathered ointment on, finally sticking the bandage on. "There, all better..." 

Die managed to get himself into a spot without any shards of glass and tugged his pants down after Kyo removed the glass from his leg so the other could tend to it. He sighed, sitting there, covered in cum, blood, and sweat. He felt sated, though a bit disgusting. He chuckled softly. "I have to say that's the most exciting wank session I've had in a long time."

Kyo laughed and leaned forward, kissing Die hotly for a moment. "I have to agree... and here I thought we'd just 'cuddle' tonight." He smirked a little. 

Die stared up at him after the kiss and smirked a little. "We could cuddle now?"

Kyo grinned and just shifted to lean against the bathroom wall, pulling Die close. "Yes, yes we could..." 

Die glanced around at the mess. "Let's clean this so the kitties don't get in it and then we can cuddle on the bed." He pecked Kyo's cheek and grinned as he stood up, discarding is pants.

Kyo snorted and stood, stretching some. He left to go get a small sweeper and dustpan, quickly taking care of the glass then getting a rag to wipe up the floor, the cabinet and the side of the toilet. "Geez baby..." 

Die went about getting himself more presentable while Kyo cleaned up the floor. He glanced down when the other made his comment, blushing and then chuckling a little. "Mmm... couldn't help that at all."

Kyo finished up and washed his hands, before stripping out of his jeans then moving to slip his arm around Die's waist. *Mm... I could tell..." He leaned in and kissed Die slowly and deeply. "You are... an amazing lover"

Die kissed his lover back equally as passionately. When they parted, he gently tugged Kyo down the hallway. "And I can say the same of you, my sweet."

Kyo smiled, blushing himself as he moved to crawl into bed, waiting eagerly for Die to join him. 

The guitarist was quick to get into the bed as well, turning off the lights and shedding his shirt and boxers before climbing in. He reached for Kyo, tugging him against his side and smiling up at the ceiling. "God you're perfect."

Kyo flushed deeply in the darkness, turning to bury his face against Die's shoulder. "I love you." 

"I love you, too, baby... so much it physically hurts sometimes." He reached to gently stroke over his lover's hair, closing his eyes, a smile on his lips.

Kyo slipped his arm around Die's waist and hugged him tight, his eyes sliding shut as he began to drop off.


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

Things had definitely improved in the month that spanned between Die and Kyo's horrible fight and the present. Die's intense desire to shower Kyo in affection and romance still hadn't subsided, though it had morphed from something clearly screaming _I'm sorry_ to something far more subtle than that. He was exceptionally proud of himself as well, having kicked the withdrawal symptoms from his alcohol abuse, and gone to something far more normal in the consumption department. In fact, in the entire month, he'd consumed one beer and a single shot of whiskey, both at the after party to one of their shows.

He found himself less stuck in his own head and more willing to simply express what he felt he needed to directly to Kyo on a regular basis, simply sitting his lover down and spilling himself to him. Granted, at times, it still took a huge amount of argument with himself internally before he did it. But it was still a vast improvement over where he'd been prior to this.

It had been a week since he'd last held one of those conversations, finally admitting a few of his deeper, darker desires to Kyo. And, in turn, the vocalist had done the same to him. Die found himself pleased with the outcome; both of them were aware of the other's darker secrets, and in both cases, the other was willing to indulge. He knew for his part, it made him less upset about wanting the things he did, and he figured it was probably the same for Kyo... or at least he hoped it was.

Die had spent the past few days preparing himself, looking up various things and acquiring the necessary 'tools' for Kyo's desires to be fulfilled. At long last, he felt like he'd found the proper time. They had four days off, Kaoru and Shinya both having things to do that required out-of-town visits to family, and that left them with time to play... and heal. Both parts being of equal importance.

And so, when Die had finished with his breakfast and they'd both completed their morning routines, Die found his opening. Kyo was just finishing brushing his teeth in the bathroom, rinsing his mouth with water, when Die came to lean against the doorframe. He knew he was walking a thin line here and he only hoped he was doing it correctly for his lover's pleasure.

One hand remained behind his back, the other holding the doorframe. He gave Kyo the deepest look of affection in the mirror, catching his gaze and holding it for a long moment before, "On your knees."

Throughout the past week, Kyo had found himself increasingly excited and nervous about his and Die's conversation. The things he'd confessed to needing treaded almost into dangerous territory. However, he felt that in some part, he deserved whatever Die would dish out to him and he hoped that when the time came, his lover wouldn't hold back. 

When they were scheduled several days off, Kyo knew that this would be the time to do this, if only so his body would heal enough to avoid any uncomfortable questions from the rest of the band. 

He had no clue how Die would go about it, but as soon as his lover appeared in the bathroom doorway as he rinsed his mouth, he knew this was it. 

A quiet command fell from his lover's lips and he was quick to comply, a shiver going through him as he carefully kneeled on the floor, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed in anticipation.

Die's eyes flicked over his lover's body as he immediately went to his knees. So submissive... so... perfect. But then, Kyo was always perfect, so that was honestly nothing different than usual.

He pushed away from the door-jam, coming to kneel behind Kyo, producing a pair of lined leather cuffs from behind his back. As he fastened them around each wrist, he lovingly caressed the skin before snapping them into place. He slotted the leather through the buckles, knowing Kyo would probably appreciate the double fasteners. He left them unhooked for the time being, knowing having his lover naked for this would be important. He stood up and offered his hand to Kyo. "Rise."

Kyo's body was nearly thrumming with excitement as he felt the cuffs being fastened around his wrists, the softest sound slipping past his lips as they snapped into place. Die bid him to rise and he did, gracefully pushing himself to his feet and keeping his head bowed.

Die had to smile at the way Kyo got himself to his feet. Always the gorgeous, toned man, even now. He hooked a finger through one of the rings on the cuffs and turned, leading Kyo to the spare bedroom. He'd been working on it, knowing Kyo wouldn't come in here enough to see the changes before this.

They entered the room and Die quietly shut the door behind them, keeping the cats out for the duration of their play. On the side there were two tables. One held small finger foods and water, the other held an arrangement of toys, ranging from those that Kyo had explicitly asked for, to those that Die himself wanted to try. There were several small razor blades, a thin knife with an excruciatingly sharp edge, a flogger, a full set of sounding rods, a riding crop, a violet wand, a ball gag, a wartenberg wheel, and a wide array of dildos, vibrators, and other such sex toys. 

The bed was covered in black sheets, more pillows than usual on it for comfort and versatility. Attached to the headboard were several hooks for attaching Kyo's wrists to, and off to one side lay a pile of red silken rope. And peeking just from under the bed was their first-aid kit... the one Die had used so often in the past on Kyo.

Die gestured at the table. "Choose if you'd like to remove anything from this now..." he chuckled softly, "or forever hold your peace." He took hold of the elastic of his pajama pants and pushed them down, kicking them aside to reveal he was wearing a pair of his old tight leather shorts, more for Kyo's viewing pleasure than anything else. He tossed his tank top onto the pile of clothing and leaned back against the wall, arms loosely held over his chest. "And our standard safe word is in effect as of now."

Kyo blinked a little as he was lead into the guest room rather than their bedroom. The reason was clear to him, however, as soon as he stepped over the threshold. 

Die had obviously gone to great lengths to plan this out and the attention to detail was exquisite. From the toys to the snacks to the hooks on the headboard were all brilliant details that Kyo greatly appreciated. 

His lover informed him that this was his only chance to remove anything and, after a quick survey of everything there, he simply shook his head. 

He looked up at Die as the other began to undress and found himself biting back a moan as tight leather shorts were revealed to be hugging Die's body in all the right ways. He ached to reach out and grab a handful of leather-clad ass, a tiny little smirk crossing his lips at the thought. 

The safe word was mentioned and he nodded, another frisson of excitement going through him. "I understand." He was determined to not use it though, despite whatever Die put him through. The very thought had his pants tightening already, his cock half-hardened and pushing the thin material of his pajamas out a bit.

Die's eyes flitted over Kyo's form, smirking a little to find him already growing aroused. "Mmm... baby loves this." He reached out to gently run his fingers under Kyo's jaw. "I have a few rules and none of them should be broken at any time, is this clear?"

He waited a few moments and then started through the rules. "First and foremost, this will only work if we go at it from my own comfort zone. I'll do everything you've wanted... and more... but in between sessions, I will tend to you. There is no choice on this, period." He flicked his fingers up under Kyo's chin, causing the other's head to rise a little bit before he let go. 

"Secondly, if at any point things begin to go down a road you do not want, you will immediately use your safe word and you will tell me what it is about it that makes you uncomfortable. I don't give a flying fuck if you think you shouldn't complain or if this is some masochistic way to try to make shit up to me... you _will_ tell me if you're uncomfortable. Again, this is not a choice, it is a rule."

Kyo lifted his gaze to Die's face, nodding once in response as he listened to the other's rules. His lips quirked up at the edges as his lover told him that there would be no negotiating his tending to, something he found truly sweet and rather reminiscent of times past in which Die had been patching him up for entirely different reasons. 

The second rule had him casting his eyes to the ground in near shame. He was unsurprised though, knowing that Die could read him like an open book. He cleared his throat and nodded. "Understood."

"Good." Die pushed himself fully away from the wall. "Now for starters..." he moved to the bed and settled down on it. "Turn me on." Not that this was hard to do in any case, but he still wanted to see where Kyo would take it under such a submissive demeanor. "And lose the clothes."

Kyo watched as Die sat on the bed and considered his request. He licked lips his and murmured out a soft, "Yes, sir," before moving to stand in front of him. 

He closed his eyes for a moment then opened them, gazing at Die as his hips began to twist and roll to an unheard beat, his hands held moving along with them. 

Without slowing down, he carefully slipped his shirt off, his body twisting as he tossed it aside. His ab muscles tensed and quivered as he moved, sliding his hand over his now bared chest then downward, catching the waistband of his pants, tugging them low on his hips but not off just yet.

He turned, facing away from Die as he continued his little dance, every muscle in his body working as he undulated. 

Finally, he slid his hands down to his hips and slowly pushed his pajamas down, revealing his bare ass to Die's gaze. He kicked them the rest of the way off then turned back around, eyes burning with desire, the faintest flush to his cheeks.

Die watched as Kyo moved, his arousal slowly ramping up to a steady boil as Kyo did the one thing Die had always imagined and hoped for. He'd jerked off so many times thinking about Kyo stripping for him, the vocalist's amazing body being bared to him in this fashion.

By the time Kyo was done, Die was fully hard within the confines of his clothing, and he sat smirking at Kyo. "Good job, baby." He lifted his hand, curling one finger to beckon Kyo over to him.

Kyo couldn't help the self-satisfied smirk that crossed his lips as he noted Die's arousal. He stepped over to him and stood there, arms to his sides. "I'm glad you liked it..."

Die reached out, gently grasping Kyo's wrists and pushing them behind his back. He clasped the two cuffs together and then smoothed his hand up Kyo's tattooed back.

After a few more moments, he smirked at the other and lifted his hand to push Kyo down on his knees, turning him slightly with the movement so that Kyo was facing him fully once again. He then reached for his own pants, opening the three buttons that kept his arousal tucked inside, and letting it spring forth. "Mmm..." he let out, ever so quietly as he slid back on the bed, just closing his eyes and starting to stroke his cock, knowing it would drive Kyo insane to not be able to touch him while he did this right in front of him. "Ahhh..." he breathed out, a smirk playing at the corner of his lips as he went a little faster for Kyo's viewing pleasure.

Kyo shivered the faintest bit as his cuffs were locked together, his cock flexing the slightest bit. He easily shifted and fell to his knees when Die pushed him there, settling back on his heels as he gazed up at Die with an almost hungry look. 

What came next was not quite what he was expecting. His lover began pleasuring himself, making him squirm and tug slightly at his bonds. Oh, that was unfair and the smirk on Die's lips told him his lover knew it, too. 

He watched attentively though, refusing to look away in the least, his tongue sliding out to lick over his lips.

Die continued until he couldn't stand it any longer, finally stopping his motions and just lying there for a few moments before he pushed himself upright. His gaze traveled the length of Kyo's body and he took in how very aroused he was. "What's the one thing you want very most right at this moment?"

Kyo watched, captivated as Die stroked himself, getting lost in his own pleasure. His cock as hard and leaning against his belly by now, his hands flexing, aching to touch it. 

The question gave him pause and he glanced over at the array of toys and devices, his lip caught between his teeth. How could he possibly choose? 

Another moment of looking and then finally he settled on something, looking back to Die. "The sounding rods."

Die's eyes flashed with arousal as the other told him what he wanted the very most. He reached to grab Kyo's hair, yanking harshly on it before letting him go and standing up.

He skirted around Kyo and then went to the table, fingers racing over things as he went. After a few moments, he finally picked up his sounding kid and smiled to himself as he moved back to the bed.

Standing beside it, he gestured. "Get up here."

Kyo pushed himself up, wavering the slightest bit then moving to sit on the bed, scooting himself back so that he was in the middle of it, looking at Die with eager anticipation. "Here?"

Die nodded, placing the kit to the side and shifting around behind Kyo, unfastening his cuffs and urging him to lay back, then attaching each cuff to the headboard so that his lover's arms were splayed wide apart.

He moved back to him, settling down and extracting his specialty lube from the kit first. He didn't speak, he simply looked between Kyo's cock and the rods. After a moment, he shifted to the other, reaching and unscrewing the little ball that held Kyo's piercing on, unfastening it and then sliding the metal piece out since it would have been in the way. He screwed the ball back on and carefully placed it aside to put back in later, ensuring it was on the dresser where it wouldn't be lost.

A moment later, he extracted the smallest rod, squirting a bit of lubricant on it before he shifted to straddle Kyo's legs, a wicked look in his eyes as he settled, reaching for the other's cock and holding it steady. He looked up into Kyo's eyes and then back down at what he was doing, a smirk on his lips as he teased the rod over the head of Kyo's prick.

Kyo accepted his arms being attached to the bed, testing the hooks and finding them quite strong. He shifted a bit and got as comfortable as he could, watching Die gather his tools. 

He couldn't stop the gasp when Die grasped his cock to remove his piercing, a little whimper following it as the metal slid through the hole there. 

Soon after, Die settled on his legs and he looked up at him, taking a breath then moaning softly as the cool metal of the rod moved over his cock. 

"Tease..."

"Always and forever a tease, baby... you know that." Die flashed Kyo his sassiest grin before he lightly slid the metal just inside the tip of Kyo's cock. His own dick was achingly hard, knowing the feeling of these rods so intimately that even using them on Kyo was turning him on like he was doing it to himself. "So hard," he breathed out, almost to tease Kyo even further, letting him know what he coudn't touch right then.

His eyes met his lover's for a long moment before he flicked them back down to what he was doing, slowly sliding the slim rod deep inside his cock. "Hnnng," he breathed out, his own cock bobbing slightly as he tensed it.  
Kyo huffed a little then squirmed against his bonds, staring at Die with dark eyes. The teasing was almost as much torture as not being able to touch his lover's hard cock. 

Finally, Die pushed the rod into the tip of his dick and he let out a low moan, the sensation incredible. He fought to keep still, clenching his hands tightly as Die pushed the metal into him, his eyes rolling back in his head slightly. "Oh..fuck... _yes_."

Die let out a soft growl at Kyo's response to the sounding rod that slipped inside of him. "That's right," he whispered out, "feels so fucking good, doesn't it?"

He shifted again, this time moving in and kissing Kyo harshly as he started to ever so gently move the rod in and out of his shaft, the desperation and roughness of his kiss in heavy opposition to the gentle, teasing way he was dealing with his lover's arousal. 

Kyo moaned out a yes then pushed his hips up just slightly, shuddering as the rod pushed deeper. 

He kissed Die back fiercely, whimpering slightly, his hands clenching and unclenching. It felt amazing to have the rod sliding inside his cock like that. Sort of like he had to pee and cum at the same time. "Hnnng..."

Die could tell he was riling his lover up something awful and it was the most amazing feeling to know that Kyo just had to accept what he was doing to him and take anything that came his way... within reason, of course. He pulled back from the kiss and licked his lips, pulling the rod free. He pulled out the next larger one, working some lube over it as well, and then pressing it at the tip of Kyo's cock. "Are you ready for this, love?"

Kyo let out the quietest whines when Die pulled the rod free. He gazed at him, licking his lips and nodding. "Please..."

Die once again teased Kyo's slit with it, enjoying the way the rod looked just slipping right inside the head and not going actually deep inside him just yet. He waited until Kyo was sufficiently desperate for it and then slid the rod all the way in to the little loop on the top. "God, baby... you look so fucking good like this." He shifted to nip at Kyo's neck, making sure to do it soft at first and progressively harder with each and every single bite thereafter.

Kyo growled in slight frustration as Die teased him more, his feet shifting on the bed, toes curling into the sheets. "Die..." His voice held a certain whiny tone to it that he hated but couldn't help as the larger rod slid into him, making his eyes roll back into his head. 

Die's teeth nipping at his neck only served to turn him on further, the pain heightening the experience for him.

Die sucked skin into his mouth as he worked the rod in and out of his lover's shaft. His own arousal was almost proving too much right then, his cock desperate for stimulation, and he knew it wouldn't be long before he gave in and fucked Kyo senseless for the first time today. He hadn't jerked off for two days, intent on using all of his lust to fuel this, and honestly, he'd even gone so far as to go see Boss for a single magical blue pill if it came down to it, though he doubted he'd find it necessary.

Pulling back, he dropped himself down to lightly suck one of Kyo's balls into his mouth as he still eased the rod in and out of his cock. He let go with a soft pop and pulled the rod free, picking up the one he'd been working up to; a new acquisition of sorts. It was a sounding rod with a slightly bulbous tip and a little button on the top. And only he knew... it vibrated.

He made a show of lubricating that one and then, unable to help it, he pushed it into his own cock just slightly, fucking himself with it slightly for a few moments. With a groan, he pulled it free, and lubed it up once again, reaching for Kyo's cock again. He smirked softly as he began to slide it into Kyo's cock, knowing how the bulbous part felt now.

Kyo was becoming undone much faster than he wanted to, his hips wiggling and hands pulling at his cuffs. "Die, Gods...hnng.." Die's mouth on his balls almost proving to be too much. He didn't want to lose it this quickly but he was having a damned hard time keeping it together. 

He shuddered when the rod was extracted from his dick, a tiny spurt of pre-cum following it. He turned his head to watch Die, pulling his lip between his teeth as he ran his eyes over the form of it. This one, he decided, would make him cum. 

He took a breath and tried to relax as Die took hold of his dick again, pushing the end into him. It was incredible and he was soon letting out a loud moan as it went in all the way. "Oh...God..."

Die let it get all the way in before he pressed the button, turning on the soft vibrations. He licked his lips, his eyes taking in the whole scene, Kyo's cock - how very strained it was, so hard, and his balls so tight... he was close, that much Die was certain of. And then his face, the beauty of his pleasure written across it, his eyes bright with desire. He smiled, slowly twirling the vibrating sound as he moved it in and out of him. "Yes, baby... you like this so much, don't you?"

Kyo thought this couldn't get any more intense but he was wrong, so very wrong. The moment he registered the vibration, he let out a cry, his toes digging into the bed. It was too much and he could feel his cheeks flushing as he strained upward. 

"D-die... I... oh Gods... FUCK!" He let out a string of curses then the most intense wave of pleasure came over him, ripping a scream from his throat, making his abdomen quiver with it. Nothing came out though, it was all built up behind the sound and the vibration was only pushing him further over the brink to the point that almost hurt.

Die let out a satisfied little chuckle as Kyo so obviously lost it. It was glorious... one of the most beautiful things he'd ever seen in his entire life. Licking his lips, he turned the vibrator function off and slowly withdrew the wand, watching as Kyo's cum leaked out the tip. With a groan, he leaned down and sucked it all from him, swallowing every last drop.

Sitting back up, he took Kyo in hand and began to pump him vigorously. "Wait on it," he breathed, "this is the best part... the very best fucking part, baby." His eyes burned with desire, his entire body registering the need to fuck... and soon... but he held it back for a minute, knowing this second orgasm was going to blow Kyo's fucking mind if he let it.

Kyo whined when Die began sucking the cum from his cock, a shudder going through him. 

He looked up at Die, shaking his head almost frantically as the other began stroking his cock. He didn't think he could stand the stimulation, not after something like that. 

How wrong he was. It was only a few moments before his world snapped in two and his body arched up off the bed as he came harder than he had in a very long time. The sounds spilling from his lips were inhuman as his cum spurted out onto his belly, a garbled cry of Die's name in there somewhere.  
Die actually let out a laugh this time, hovering over Kyo's body. "See... I told you it'd rock your fucking world." He gently milked the rest from Kyo's cock and then pulled back, just letting the cum remain on his belly, doing nothing to get rid of it this time.

He sat back, picking up the sounding rod and giving it a bit more lube before he pressed it into his own cock with a groan, his hips arching. He needed to give Kyo a little bit of time to regroup after that and he knew it... and really, he wanted to play with his new toy as well. Slowly, he started to move it in and out, really liking the girth of the rounded part up inside him. "O-oh," he let out as he turned it on, the vibrations sliding through his body in the most amazing of manners.

Kyo grunted at Die, collapsing back on the bed with a pant. His cock twitched slightly in Die's hand, a shiver going through him. "Fuck..."

He shifted slightly to sit up a bit, watching Die, licking his lips and groaning softly. "Hnng..you know it's torture...watching you..."

Die's eyes flickered up to Kyo's and he smirked at him. "That's the point, baby," he breathed out, sliding the sound further into his cock and then sliding it back out with a groan. "Yes," he let out in a whimper, his hips pushing up a few times. "Fuck... oh god... I want to cum!" All the same, he pulled the rod free of his cock, turning it off and placing it back with the others, biting hard on his lower lip as he just stared at himself, at how ruddy the tip of his cock was, how tight his balls were drawn up. He wanted to cum, that was for damn sure.

Kyo snorted and licked his lips, watched Die, arousal slowly washing over him again. Before long, he was half hard again, his lover's desperation really getting him. 

When Die cried out that he wanted to cum, Kyo couldn't help but whisper, "Cum..."

Die's eyes flicked to him and he huffed out a soft laugh. "Oh, baby... I'll cum." He threw his head back and laughed louder, the sound more aroused than anything. "Oh, I'll fucking cum, trust me."

Flicking his eyes back up to the other, he examined him for a long few moments. Without a word, he reached to let down Kyo's arms, the straps extending so that Kyo could lay down on the bed, but still not reach his cock unless he contorted into a pretty fucked up position. "C'mon baby... open that gorgeous mouth," he murmured as he settled astride his chest.

Kyo gave Die a look between aroused and annoyed when the other laughed. His lover was getting a real kick out of this all and he was beginning to wonder if Die had a secret sadist side to him. 

He huffed and shifted when his arms were released, stretching them a bit, testing the limits then looking up at Die. He licked his lips then parted them, readying himself for Die's cock.

Die reached out, stroking a hand over Kyo's hair, his eyes alight with an aroused fire that nothing could touch right then. "You've got three days... you know what that means, right?" He wet his lips in the most sensual of manners before he grabbed a handful of hair and pushed his cock into Kyo's mouth with a groan. "Oh yeeah," he intoned, his body shivering with how good that felt. And for a moment, he just let Kyo adjust, not feeling like having the other actually gagging on him right then. Once he was sure Kyo was acclimated to having his dick shoved down his throat, he began to thrust, keeping Kyo's head still as he moved, just taking his pleasure in that mouth, heedless of the comforts he usually gave during such a session.

Kyo's eyes burned dark as Die mentioned their time limit, meaning that he was likely going to be hoarse after this. Oddly though, it was something he looked forward to, his voice roughened by Die's cock thrusting down his throat. 

He moaned lowly as Die's length pushed into his mouth, sliding past his lips and to the back of his throat. He swallowed once, allowing his gag reflex to relax then let his eyes slid shut as Die began thrusting. 

He made sure to keep his teeth covered with his lips as his mouth was fucked, his tongue flicking up to run over the underside occasionally. It didn't take Die long, the guitarist already intensely aroused from the prior events. He gripped Kyo's hair hard, pulling intentionally as he gave a few last, rough thrusts, his pubic bone pressing against Kyo's face as he ground into it. And then he cried out, stilling as his cock twitched and he let the first spurt down Kyo's throat. Quickly, he pulled out, moaning as he jerked himself across Kyo's lips, nose, and cheek, smearing the last dribble across reddened lips. "Ah, baby," he moaned out, still making little pleased, post-orgasmic sounds.

Kyo couldn't help but wince as his hair was yanked on, letting out a whimper around Die's cock. He flailed his arms a little uselessly as Die came down his throat, another sound slipping out as he eagerly swallowed it. 

Somehow, though, he'd known his lover wouldn't give him the full load and he slid his eyes shut as cum splashed onto his face, his tongue flicking out to catch watch it could, including the head of Die's cock. 

He looked up at his lover, looking completely debauched with cum on his face, his lips red and vaguely swollen. Die licked his own lips as he stared down at the other. He ran his hand over the dry patch of cheek and then smirked as he pushed away from him. "Mmm... what to do with you next?" He glanced back at him. "I think," he sauntered over to the table, fingers running over a variety of objects, "I want to see your ass so fucking sore you can't sit on it." With that, he picked up the crop and slid it over his hand, turning to look at Kyo, a devilish smirk on his face.

Kyo licked his lips again then stuck his tongue out, trying to catch the bits on his cheeks and nose. He glowered a little as Die just left it then watch his lover pick up the crop, a new shiver of excitement going through him. 

He stared at Die then tilted his chin up defiantly, shrugging a bit. "Your arm will get tired before that..."

Die let out the darkest chuckle yet. "Try me." He shifted forward and gently flipped it up under Kyo's chin. "Baby, you're talking to a guitarist. My arm won't get tired until you're a bleeding pile of what used to be a vocalist." He lightly smacked his chin with it again and then shrugged. "But... we'll certainly test it out."

With that, he tucked it into a pocket of his shorts and reached for the other's hands, shifting the clips to the other side so that Kyo's arms were crisscrossed in a manner that made it easier if he'd turn over and get on his knees. He stepped back, seeing if Kyo would do this himself or if he needed... encouragement.

Kyo sneered just slightly, snapping his teeth at the crop. "We'll see..." He knew he was pushing his luck, because Die was right, being a guitarist gave his lover the advantage. 

He let his arms be crisscrossed then just stared at Die, a smirk playing on his lips as he didn't move an inch.

Die lightly wacked Kyo's side, enough to sting, but not enough to cause any damage there. "On your knees, you sassy bitch." He shook his head a little, a smirk working its way onto his mouth, something about Die enjoying the dynamic between the two.

Kyo let out a little yelp, more surprised than anything at the smack. He huffed and shifted himself onto his knees, burrowing his head against the pillow, wiping some of the cum from his face. "Yes, _sir_."

"Mmm," Die let out, feeling himself getting a little rise out of Kyo handing over control in that single word. He reached out then, his fingertips exploring his lover in a way he never really let himself. Each curve or sharp angle of the other's body was explored, every tattoo rubbed lightly over, and even the most intimate parts were touched in his exploration. Once he was satisfied, he leaned in and lightly bit Kyo's behind, lapping at the area a moment later, then drawing back and smacking his ass with the riding crop, the smack of it slipping through the air between them.

Kyo shivered under Die's touch, knowing that this was just a prelude to the pain but enjoying it nonetheless. He could almost trace the tattoos in his mind's eye as Die's fingers slid over them. 

He let out a little sound when Die bit into his rear, his hips pushing back the slightest bit. He didn't have much time to enjoy the sensation though as soon the fiery sting of the riding crop was hitting him, the sound of it whistling through the air first. 

He clenched his jaw, refusing to cry out just yet, refusing to make Die stop because he _needed_ this so much.

Die shifted his stance, lifting his chin and putting a defiant look in his eyes as his mind closed off to the pain he was causing his lover and only focusing on the fact that somehow, somewhere, this got Kyo off harder than anything else. Part of him knew it was some absurd punishment for the pain he'd put Die through, but the other part of him refused to acknowledge this and stumbled onward with the idea that it was fully a pleasurable thing for the smaller man.

Again and again, he brought the riding crop down, at first moving the position of it over Kyo's entire rear-end, watching the skin turn pale pink in his wake. But then he aimed for what he knew Kyo actually wanted, hitting the same place in quick succession, not letting up or giving him time to breathe in between, determined in some bizzare way to hear Kyo cry out from this.  
As masochistic as it was, Kyo found bliss in each and every strike that Die rained down on his ass. A few quiet whimpers escaped him as he shifted and pushed against the bed, his cock fully hard by now. 

It wasn’t until Die stopped going here and there with the strikes and instead focused on one spot that he finally gave in and cried out in pleasure pain. "Oh..Die!"

Die tilted his head, taking note of Kyo's hardened cock and he found himself growing aroused at the idea that this actually did bring Kyo a good amount of pleasure. Some part of him felt a little upset that he had neglected this side of Kyo, that he'd let it slide out from their usual love-making and become a thing that needed to stretch out into several days instead. Silently, he vowed to add a few more little things to their usual rather than having to pull this.

He gave him a few more good smacks and then slid the edge of the crop down to his balls, smirking a little as he played over them gently with it. Would Kyo beg him to not do it? Or would he want it? Just the sting of it? The idea of pushing his lover's boundaries was amazingly freeing to him.

Kyo tensed when the crop played over his sac, a shiver going up his spine. He was torn between wanting that exquisite pain and being slightly afraid of it. 

In the end, he settled for a low moan and a quiet plea in the form of Die's name, deciding to let his lover take it wherever. "Die..."

Die twitched a little at the sound of his name, knowing it to be Kyo's curiosity leading him to the tone not being warning and more desiring. He slid the crop up and over his cock and then back down over his sac. With a soft inward breath, he gave the area just at the back of where Kyo's scrotum connected to his taint a light whack, seeing what he'd get from that first before going all the way down.

Kyo glanced back to look at Die then shifted slightly before letting out a low groan when the crop slid over his aching cock. 

He took in a breath the let it out in a huff as he felt the sting of the crop, the pain making his body clench a little. He bit his lip, shifting forward to give Die better access, wiggling a bit.

Kyo's movements told him everything he needed to know about the whole thing and he moved down about half an inch and repeated the process, smacking him good and hard again.

Kyo couldn't stop the cries that slipped past his lips at this point, his body jerking slightly with each smack. Finally he decided that area had had enough and whimpered out quietly their safe word. "Pine...apple..."

Die relented immediately, pulling back and dropping the crop off to the side. He instantly slid onto the bed, unfastening Kyo's cuffs from the restraint system and gently tugging the vocalist into his arms. He pressed his lips against his shoulder, fingertips lightly roaming the other's hipbone in an attempt to comfort. "Tell me what you need, Kyo."

Kyo shivered then slumped forward against Die, wincing a little. He let out a little laugh and shook his head, looking down at his hard cock. "The crop there...was not working for me..."

"Hnn," Die murmured out quietly, reaching down to gently cup his lover's balls, cradling them for comfort for a few long moments. His hand slid up to Kyo's shaft, working over it for a few strokes. "Let me know when you're ready again," he murmured, gently moving his lips over Kyo's shoulder and neck.

Kyo shuddered slightly, pushing into Die's hand a bit. He soaked up the comfort for a few minutes more then let out a sigh, turning to catch Die's lips in a kiss. "I'm ready..."

Die leaned down and kissed him gently on the lips. "Mmm... okay, well, let's see what we can do next then yes?" He chuckled softly, pulling away from Kyo and gesturing. "On your back this time."

Kyo huffed out a laugh then situated himself on his back, wincing the slightest bit as his sore bum brushed against the covers. "Do your worst... or best..."

Die slid forward, cuffing Kyo once again to the headboard, drawing up the cuffs so he had to keep his arms stretched up above him rather than down by his head. Slipping away from the bed, he procured a few things away from his lover's line of sight.

Coming back, he settled between Kyo's thighs and tucked a few things away under his thigh, showing him one of them quite clearly though, a slim vibrator that Kyo had to know Die enjoyed when on his own at times. He flicked his gaze up and then applied some lube to it before slipping it between his lover's abused cheeks and pressing it into his body.

Kyo looked at Die with a little pout as his hands were once again cuffed up to where he couldn't move them at all. He shifted and watched his lover gather whatever implements he needed then moved between his legs. 

He licked his lips and spread his legs wider apart, looking at the vibe with interest. He didn't have to wait long to feel the pleasure from it, it soon being pushed into his body, making his groan. "Hnng...yes..."

Die smirked as he thrust it in and out a few times before turning it on and leaving it there, tucked neatly inside his lover's body for the time being. "Close your eyes."

Kyo squirmed as Die pushed the vibe into him, making him moan. He shuddered when Die just left it inside him, his hips canting up slightly before he settled then did as Die asked, closing his eyes. "Hnng...why?"

"Because I said so." Die's voice held a quiet command to it now, one that clearly wasn't to be sassed with right then. He slowly pulled the second object free from under his thigh, staring down at the small blade in his fingers. Could he really start this up again? Carve into the other's skin in such a manner when Kyo wasn't going through hell right then. But then... he was, wasn't he? He was lost in a hell that was all his own making, and Die couldn't drag him out of it... unless he did this for him.

Determination lit his gaze as he allowed his fingers to travel up the back of Kyo's leg, gently over the tattoo there and then upward until he was lightly caressing the area just behind his kneecap. He shifted then, reaching his free hand out to the other thigh, careful to give no warning before he pressed the blade to skin, slowly opening a shallow wound on the other's thigh.  
Kyo couldn't deny the chill that trailed down his spine at the tone of Die's voice. It was just what he needed, really and he quickly closed his eyes, pulling his lip between his teeth as he squirmed slightly against the vibe still going in his ass. 

He felt Die's hand slide along his leg and he hummed softly, curious about what Die had in mind for this moment. 

He didn't have to wait long though, a very familiar sensation hitting him as his skin was sliced open. He cried out, hands clenching as his heart started pounding. "Oh Gods... Die... yes... _please_!"

Die's head tilted slightly, watching Kyo's response to the moment play out over his entire body and then along his face. He listened to the words and then gave a slight nod that he knew Kyo couldn't see, but still felt the need to express anyway.

Another few moments of lightly caressing and then another line, just parallel to the other, of equal depth and length, his finger lightly trailing the old wound, knowing it'd probably sting from the small amount of salt present on all people's skin.

Kyo licked his lips and took a breath, taking a moment to shift his body slightly. He let out a moan as the vibe moved as well, just brushing his prostate, sending electric shocks to his cock.

The blade cut into his skin again and he moaned, tensing his thigh, feeling the blood run down it and relishing the sting of Die's finger on the other wound. It was something that no one else would understand, but the release he felt from just those two tiny little cuts, was near overwhelming.

Die moved on to another cut that crossed through the other two as if he were trying to make actual symbols on the other's body with his work. He had his lower lip shoved between his teeth, working it firmly there as he narrowed his eyes on his work, gauging how much good he was doing for Kyo versus bad to his body, trying to ensure the two came together but didn't merge into more bad and less good.

Kyo whimpered, squeezing his eyes tighter, the faintest bit of moisture leaking from the corners. He loved the pain but it was also borderline emotional release and right now, he was caught up in both sensations, especially with the vibe in his ass. 

He let out a sound and shifted again, pushing down on said toy, groaning as it hit his prostate again. "Gods..."

Die's fingers left his thigh, trailing along to the vibrator and pushing it up a few times, purposely doing for Kyo what he'd been doing by pressing down on it. He left it there for a few seconds and then relented, his other hand swiftly cutting a fourth line at exactly the same moment, this one slightly deeper, longer, than the others.

When the combination of the vibe pushing into him and then blade slicing into his skin, he hovered for a moment on the brink then let out a scream of near agony as his grip on reality slipped and he flew off the edge. He damn near convulsed with the power of it, cum spurted from his cock to mix with the dried mess already there as well as hitting his chest.

Die watched Kyo with something that was near fascination, pleased by the fact that the other was getting off on this, happy that he had such an outright display of release with it, rather than feeling like he was hurting the other so badly with his every cut.

He allowed a few moments to pass and then turned off the vibrator, pulling it from Kyo's spent body, and shifted over him, gently pressing against him, showering him in his love and affection.

Kyo's body went slack once the vibe was pulled from him, a shuddering going through him. "Hnn.."

He licked his lips and shifted, letting Die take care of him, leaning into his lover's touch. He took a few breaths, shuddering every now and then. "Die..."  
Die leaned in to lightly kiss Kyo's cheek, pressing his own cheek there a moment later, one hand still soothing, the other going to release Kyo from his bonds. "I love you," he whispered against his ear, his hips moving against the other despite his mostly flaccid length right then.

Kyo immediately grabbed one of Die's hands once his own were free, bringing it his mouth to kiss it softly. He smiled slightly from the haze surrounding him, Die's words reaching his ears. "I love you, too... so much."

Die pressed his lips against Kyo's neck, just pushing them there as he rutted against him, still not hard, but obviously needing the contact for his own reasons, knowing this was the opposite of the point with the whole thing, but also knowing they were pretty much in time-out for the time being.

Kyo shifted back against Die, reaching one hand back to push into his lover's hair, sighing softly. He knew Die needed the contact more so than he did and the thought had him smiling. He was supposed to be the one in pain and such, but he knew this was hard for Die in a lot of ways.

Die huffed after a while, his cock finally picking up on what he was doing and growing hard between them. He settled down after a bit and just rested against Kyo, his hardened length pressed lightly against Kyo's slackened own. He pressed one hand into Kyo's hair and held him there for a long few moments, debating if he had the strength to simply pull away right then, to move forward like he hadn't just lost his shit in the slightest manner.

Kyo floated for a while in a post-orgasmic haze, only registering that Die was getting hard again when his lover made a noise. He opened his eyes and gazed at Die, reaching up to cup his cheek, smirking a little as he pushed his hips against Die's thrusts.

Die looked back down at his lover, his eyes full of pleasure and desperation. After a few moments, he gave in, gently wiping the remaining cum from Kyo's face as he shifted fully between his legs. Without anything more in the prep or lube departments, he simply slid inside his lover, groaning as he filled him, knowing it'd give Kyo that edge of pain he wanted and still have some lubricant from the toy to guide his way.

Kyo let out a soft moan as Die pushed into him, stretching him some despite the toy having been there already. It was a delicious kind of pain mixed with the wonderful pleasure of having his lover connected to him this way and he pushed aside all pretenses of their play for a moment to catch Die's lips in a deeply passionate kiss.

The redhead took that moment as permission, as the honest second of Kyo handing him the key and telling him to do as he could. He shifted up on his knees a little more, pulling Kyo close to himself as he started to thrust, desperate to give the other all that he felt right then.

Kyo moaned softly and wrapped his arms around Die's neck, burrowing against his neck as he hitched his leg up, moving his body in unison with his lover's. The emotions swimming in the air were palpable and he took a breath and let down his barriers, letting them wash over him and even releasing some of his own.

Die could almost feel what this moment was becoming, as though it were tangible on the air around them. But he knew for a fact that his own emotional barriers were already in shambles, not meant to contain a damn thing right then. He groaned a little as he thrust into Kyo's pliant body, his cock straining, and his heart beating frantically. "Kyo," he whispered out, his arms clutching the other tightly.

The shift in the mood of the moment nearly took his breath away as his barriers dropped and Kyo almost regretted it. There was no changing it however and all he could do then was ride it out, knowing that in the end, it would be better. 

He swallowed hard and shifted his body, hitching his leg over Die's hip, his hands splaying out and running down Die's back and over his side before he pressed his forehead to his lover's. "Daisuke."

Die let out a strangled sort of moan, closing his eyes as he thrust into the other's body, his aim two-fold. He wanted to cum and he wanted to delve so deeply into Kyo that the other would understand everything about him all at once, that he'd know for certain that Die had forgiven him, know he wasn't just joking around in that respect at all. He groaned as he thrust in and then stilled for a moment, the straining as his hips circled, grinding himself against his lover's body.

Kyo swallowed hard as Die pushed deep inside him, in more ways than one. He pushed back, trying to tell Die without words how much he regretted what he'd said and done and the anguish he'd caused him. He shifted and rocked against Die, teetering on the brink of breaking down, his emotions threatening to drown him.

Die's hips jerked once more and then with a tiny little cry, he was filling his love to the brim, glorious bliss sliding over his every particle of being. He slid his hand down to Kyo's cock, lithe fingers wrapping around him and starting to stroke. "My love," he breathed out quietly.

The feeling of Die releasing into him caused Kyo to moan and he pushed against him, clenching his body gently around his lover's cock. He trailed his nails over Die's shoulder blades then pushed into his hand, shuddering as Die stroked his sensitive cock. 

It took less than a moment for him to follow Die over the edge, a quiet moan sliding out as he came between them, his hand griping Die's bicep. "Ah... Dai..."

Die let out a satisfied little hum when Kyo came, gently releasing his cock and sliding his arms around the other's body instead, caressing him ever so gently. "You mean the world to me," he confessed quietly, a smile on his lips.

Kyo gave a whole body shudder the stilled, clinging to Die as he buried his face against the juncture of his shoulder. Die's words had him clenching his jaw and swallowing a few times before he could respond, quietly stating, "You are my world."

Die gently kissed Kyo on the top of the head and then pulled back enough to look him in the eye. "Is this what you needed?" he asked softly, fingertips sliding over Kyo's bare chest, his eyes never leaving his lover's, not even for a moment.

Kyo licked his lips, nodding his head, finding that he felt a sort of inner peace. He took a breath and leaned in, kissing Die softly before pulling back again, maintaining eye contact. "Thank you..."

Die smiled softly at him, reaching to caress his cheek. "Okay... let's wash up then, shall we?" he murmured softly, not wanting to break the mood.  
Kyo nodded, leaning into Die's touch then carefully pulling back to sit up with a soft groan, various little injuries making themselves known.

Die reached to undo each of Kyo's shackles, smirking a little and then tossing them aside on the bed. "Hnn... come on, baby."

Kyo rubbed his wrists a little then scooted to the edge, standing up slowly with a sigh, his legs feeling like jelly right then and not quite wanting to work.   
He managed to make his way to the bathroom, reaching in and cutting the shower on before leaning against the wall, giving Die a soft smile.

Die followed Kyo into the bathroom, quietly ditching his shorts off to the side and moving to quickly wash up the things he'd brought with him. He leaned back against the sink a moment later and smiled at his lover.  
Kyo turned and looked at Die, smiling then slipping into the shower, sagging against the wall. He was out of energy for the moment and was looking forward to the finger foods and some water. "Hnn.."

Die followed Kyo in, going about lathering up two loofahs and handing one over to Kyo, starting to scrub himself off with the other. Words seemed unnecessary right then and he refused to break the comfort of their silence for the time being. So many things seemed to have fallen more into place and he found himself pleased by it.

Kyo silently took the loofah and scrubbed himself clean in record time, moving under the spray after and reaching out to trail a finger down Die's arm with a smile. 

He felt so at peace right then and it was amazing. He took to leaning against the shower wall again, simply watching Die, his eyes half-lidded. Die went through his motions and then moved to rinse off, smiling at Kyo as the other reached out to touch him. "Mmm..." he murmured softly. After a few minutes, he reached to turn the shower off and slid out of the stall, offering Kyo a soft towel.

Kyo took the towel and dried off then scrubbed it over his hair before dropping it in a little pile next to the shower, standing there nude. He looked down to examine the cuts on his thigh, humming softly and reaching down to press his fingers to them lightly.

Die watched his lover as he dried off. After a few moments, he reached to gently run his fingers through Kyo's short, black hair, leaning in to kiss him lightly on the ear. "Love you, cupcake." He laughed at the nickname, clearly having intended to make Kyo be amused by this.

Kyo laughed softly and turned, nipping at Die's chin. "Cupcake indeed..." He looked his lover over and grinned, reaching out to tug a wet strand of red hair. "Love you, too, princess."

Die let out a soft laugh. He grinned and then lightly tapped Kyo under the chin. "Hnn..." he murmured softly, leading Kyo toward the room once again, only this time he went to pick up a sandwich half and a bottle of water.  
Kyo followed and crawled onto the bed, grabbing a sandwich half, a handful of grapes and some water for himself, sitting cross-legged while he nibbled his food.

Die settled next to Kyo, carefully eating his half of the sandwich and downing little sips of water in between. He sniffed a little and then looked over at Kyo, giving him a soft look, but not saying anything just yet. He reached to pick up a tiny candy and pushed it into his mouth, chewing and making a pleased little face. He rarely indulged in sweets, but he loved them when he did. Kyo shifted a bit, scrunching his face up as the welt on his rear rubbed against the covers. He leaned against Die's shoulder for a moment of closeness as he drank half his water then screwed the top back on. 

He looked down at the cuts on his thigh, brushing his hand over them lightly, sighing at the slight pain. He licked his lips and ran his hand up and back, stroking fondly over his new tattoo. The pain of the two was similar.  
Die watched Kyo from the corner of his eye, smirking a little. After a few minutes, he murmured, "You got the tattoo for me finally," he murmured softly. "You have no idea how much that makes me happy."

Kyo glanced up and smiled at Die, shrugging his shoulder a little. "I needed to..." he said quietly. 

Die smiled at the other and reached to gently touch his thigh. "And I needed you to," he replied quietly. After a moment, he moved back to the food assortment, grabbing a little orange and quickly starting to peel it, licking his lips as he revealed it.  
Kyo hummed and settled again before deciding that he wanted more to eat and reached over to grab another little sandwich, nibbling it as he watched Die peel the orange.

Die made his way through the orange, tossing the peels in the trash and flopping back on the bed with a pleased sigh. "Mmm... so... how am I doing so far?"

Kyo finished off his sandwich then nibbled a piece of candy before downing the rest of the water, tossing it into the trash. "Mmm, wonderfully..."

"Good," Die replied softly, pushing his hands under his head and smirking up at the ceiling. "Lay down."

Kyo shifted and did as Die asked, lying next to him, looking over at his lover curiously.

"So obedient," he murmured quietly, reaching to run his fingers over Kyo's abdomen and then down to his thighs, nails scratching as he pulled them back up. 

Kyo's stomach muscles quivered at Die's touch, his eyes lidding slightly. "Mm, for now..." He gave Die a teasing smirk, reaching out to scrape one nail over the back of Die's hand.

"Oh... we'll see," Die replied as he rolled over onto his lover, water bottle abandoned on the bed beside him. He ground down against him lightly, watching his face for his reaction to such things.

Kyo chuckled then let out a little sound as Die rolled atop him. He groaned softly, pushing his hips upward a bit. "Hnn..."

Die's fingers slid along Kyo's abdomen and thighs, a smirk sliding over his face as he looked down at the other man. "Hey gorgeous..." he moved his hand up over Kyo's chest and then up to his throat, reaching and then closing around it, "I'm gonna break you."

Kyo licked his lips, gazing up at him, goose-bumps popping out over his skin where Die touched. Those long fingers slid over his throat and he felt his cock twitch, particularly when they tightened around it. Die's words had him shivering and he whispered out a strained "Please..."

Die's fingers tightened even more, his eyes attentively watching Kyo's face for all the signs he knew he needed about when to keep going and when to let up. He just had to gauge it right, that was all.

Kyo groaned, swallowing with the slightest bit of difficulty, his body arching up to press against Die's, his cock hardening rapidly. He could feel his pulse, thumping against Die's thumb, the flow of restricted blood just enough to make him vaguely light headed, his air cut off just a bit.

Die tilted his head, watching Kyo with dark eyes as the other moved under him, as his body responded to the pressure on his throat with excitement. He chuckled and moved his other hand down to grasp Kyo's cock, stroking him lightly as he applied even more pressure.

Kyo's vision was beginning to get a little hazy but it only served to turn him on more, especially with Die's hand stroking him to full hardness. He pulled in what air he could, letting out a little sound afterward, one hand moving up to hold onto Die's wrist.

Die leaned down and murmured, "Two hard squeezes for an out." With that, he licked his lover's ear and retreated again, only his hands on Kyo's body, one pleasuring him quickly, the other squeezing him in a way he knew would probably end up leaving marks, though not too badly at least. Kyo nodded as best he could to indicate that he understood then let his eyes roll back, his hips pushing more frantically against Die's hand. He let out a strangled moan, his nails digging into Die's arm as he held onto it. 

Finally he felt himself slipping away from lack of oxygen and he clenched his hand once and then again, his hips never stilling. Die waited on it, feeling the first squeeze and then the second. He let up, still keeping his hand there, but the pressure entirely false now, his hand still working quickly over Kyo's cock and his eyes still on his lover's face.

Kyo gasped in a breath then groaned, his hand slipping up to Die's chest, tweaking his nipple with a smirk. "Hnn..."

Die chuckled down at his lover, running his palms over the expanse of the other's skin, abandoning his cock for the time being. "Mmm... you sweet, sweet, _delicious_ man." He jerked hard on his cock for a moment and then stilled, just clenching his fist over Kyo's cock again and again.

Kyo shifted, spreading his legs slightly, his whole body arching and moving as the other touched him so nicely. He let out a sigh then moaned as Die's hand squeezed in cock in such a way. "Gods..."

"Tell me what you want, Kyo... how do you want me to fuck with you next?" Die hissed out quietly, his hand finally stilling on the other's cock.  
Kyo licked his lips, shivering slightly then peering at Die. He glanced over at the various implements then bit his lip, considering it for a moment. "Shibari... then... surprise me..."

Die let out a little groan of approval and then pushed himself away from Kyo. "Stand up and spread your legs." He slid off the bed and grabbed the red silken ropes, smiling a bit.

Kyo couldn't help the smirk that crossed his lips as he shifted and stood up, spreading his legs, his hands on his hips. "Like this?"

"Mmm... close enough," Die purred out softly, slowly beginning to twine the ropes around his lover's body. He wasn't an expert at this, but he'd studied up enough to know some basic stuff. As he twisted and weaved, he sort of fell into a trance of simple bliss, the whole art of it seeming to relax him somehow.

Kyo hummed then relaxed his stance slightly as Die began wrapping him in red rope. The way his lover took great care to get it just right made him smile. The ropes felt good being tightly bound around his body and his cock throbbed a bit from the pleasure of it all.

Die didn't hesitate, not even once as he bound the other up. He smirked softly as he worked, fingers dancing over the ropes, lightly moving between them, weaving here and there.

Die's fingers caused him to shiver, the rope digging into his skin in all the right ways. He let out a sigh then looked at Die. "Take a picture," he quietly requested. He wanted to see the ropes crossing over his tattooed skin.  
Die stepped back from him once he was actually done and lightly patted his ass. "Stay still, baby." He slipped out of the room and came back with one of his poloroid cameras, quickly taking a few snapshots of Kyo from various angles and then setting the prints out to develop. He put the camera aside and then settled back on the dresser. "On your knees."

Kyo did as Die bid, standing still when the other left the room. Die returned with a camera and he smiled slightly as Die snapped the photos. He would have to look at them later. 

He shifted and carefully got to his knees, groaning as the rope pulled and strained around him. It really was a delicious feeling.

Die watched Kyo get on his knees and he smiled softly, licking his lips a little. "You look delicious like this, you know that, right?" He sat down on the bed, reaching out one foot to gently poke at Kyo with his foot, hooking one toe into a rope and pulling a little.

Kyo smirked a little then glanced down at Die's foot, grunting when one of the ropes were pulled. He shifted forward and moved his hand, trailing a nail over the top of Die's foot, pressing against the vein there.

Die arched his eyebrow a little, chuckling softly. "Baby boy... you like my foot on you?" He smirked softly, rubbing his toe gently over the other's side.  
Kyo snorted at the nick name then shook his head, shrugging a bit. "Not really but...you put it there..."

"Mmmhmm," Die replied quietly, reaching for Kyo and snapping a rope gently. He licked his lips a little. "You're my gorgeous, wonderful little baby," he murmured softly. He pushed his foot against the other's side, smirking a little bit. "You're such a cock-tease like this... all tressed up... and no place to go."

Kyo pulled back his lips, snarling a little at Die as he teased him, letting out a little growl. "Hnn... all tied up and at your mercy..."

"Utterly," Die murmured softly. "Utterly and entirely." He licked his lips a little bit and prodded at Kyo's side again before flopping back, just leaving Kyo there, completely not touching him for the time being.

Kyo huffed a little, squirming in place a bit. His cock was hard and in need of attention. Attention he wasn't getting from Die. He let out a little whine, pushing his hips up slightly as he glowered at Die's form.  
Die just remained there, on his back, a smirk on his lips as he stared up at the ceiling. "Stay there, no moving."

Kyo growled, stilling for a moment then shifting around, pushing himself up to a kneeling position rather than sitting back on his heels.

"I thought I told you to stay still?" Die pushed out his foot, shoving the other a little bit with it.

Kyo grunted when he was pushed back, that riling him up a bit. He huffed then shifted back up, slapping out a Die's foot.

Die let out a huff and then pushed himself upright. "Nope, not gonna do," he murmured softly. He wet his lips and then reached out grabbing the flogger, shoving it under Kyo's nose and brandishing it there. "You want this. But you're not going to get it." He pulled back and then yanked Kyo to his feet, pushing him over on the bed and quickly tying up the other silken ropes to get Kyo attached to the bed with arms and ankles. Kyo snapped his teeth at the flogger then let out an "oomph" as he was moved around. 

He couldn't contain the look of sheer lust that came over his face as Die attached him to the bed completely, leaving him unable to move much. He licked his lips and smirked a little, looking at Die. "You just don't have the guts to use it," he taunted.

"Oh please," Die spat out at him, "amateur." He tossed it on the bed, a tantalizing reminder, and then snatched up a strip of cloth, rolling it a few times and then kneeling on the bed next to Kyo, careful to not let his body touch him. He slid it all around his lover's head and then knotted it slightly to the side so it wouldn't dig into the back of his head the way he was lying there.  
With that done, he stood up, picked up his bottle of water, and simply stood there for a moment.

Kyo snorted, then narrowed his eyes as he watched Die with the cloth, wondering what he was going to do with it. For a moment, he thought Die might gag him and he couldn't deny the vague sense of relief when, instead, it was wrapped around his eyes. 

He simply huffed and turned his head in the direction he thought Die was in. He curled his lip up in a sneer and tugged at his binds. "Can't handle me, huh?"

"Shut your pretty cake-hole or I'll fill that, too," Die returned in the most flippant of manners, a smirk on his lips.

Kyo laughed, shaking his head. "You already did, if I recall correctly..."

Die didn't reply this time, taking some of his water and flicking it toward Kyo before shaking his head a little and grabbing the ball gag. He settled down next to Kyo and debated it for a moment. Finally, he tapped him on the mouth with it. "Shut it. Now."

Kyo flinched slightly when water was flicked on him. He opened his mouth to make some smart ass remark about being wet but then a ball gag was being tapped against his lips and he decided against it. He settled for baring his teeth instead, snarling slightly.

Die chuckled a little and shook his head. Without another word, he simply got up from the bed and walked to the door. He paused there for a moment and then opened it, stepping out, and shutting it behind him. A bit of sensory deprivation never hurt anyone anyway.

Kyo listened to Die walk away then huffed as the door shut, Die's footsteps retreating down the hall. 

He laid there for a moment, wondering at what he must look like, like this. Tied up and rock hard, his cock heavy against his belly and oozing pre-cum. He let out a soft groan and tried to push his hips up, looking for some kind of stimulus and finding none. 

He wondered how long it would be till Die returned. How long could his lover handle waiting? Die stood there for a moment and then shrugged, wandering off to the kitchen for a Popsicle from the freezer. He stood there, quietly licking at it while he watched the clock count the minutes away, wondering how long it would be before Kyo started to panic on him.

Kyo was fine for the first few minutes but then his inner demons woke up and began tormenting him, taunting him by telling him that Die was just going to leave him there. 

He ignored it successfully for a bit, then started struggling with his binds , his stomach knotting as his mind tortured him with thoughts of what would happen if there was a fire or an earthquake. 

A sheen of sweat popped out all over his body and his breath quickened as he rolled things over in his mind, feeling more and more trapped but no less aroused. Surely Die would be back soon. Right?

Die finished off his popsicle and then tossed the stick in the recycle bin before making his way upstairs again. He stood just outside the door, listening... waiting... knowing the other would eventually cave and call for him, and that would be his moment.

After a few moments, he went to the bedroom and grabbed the lube there, quickly prepping himself for what he wanted to come next, smirking a little as he wiped his fingers off and came back to the guest room door, leaning against the frame.

Amongst his inner torment, Kyo picked up on the sound of Die's footsteps again and let out a little sound of relief. It was short lived, however, because Die didn't enter the room and instead seemed to be heading into their bedroom. 

He bit his lip harshly then, after another struggle with his ropes, gave in. He turned his head towards the door, hoping Die could hear him. "Die...? Please..."  
Immediately Die opened the door, shutting it quietly behind him. He still said nothing, moving to the bed and quietly shifting to settle beside Kyo, his hand on his lover's hip.

Kyo shifted a bit more when he heard the door open and shut. "Die?" For a brief moment, he had a slight panic attack that someone else had come in, but then rational thought as well as Die's hand on his hip calmed him and he squirmed a little at the touch.

"It's me," Die replied quietly, sensing Kyo's unease with the whole ordeal. Quietly, he reached out and grasped Kyo's cock, eager to stroke him back to full arousal, licking his lips a little at what was to come.

Kyo nodded once then moaned once Die's hand was on him. It didn't take him long before he was pushing his hips up as best as he could, his cock once again at full mast. "Gods..."

Die groaned softly, finally pulling away and then shifting so that he was over Kyo without touching him. He waited for a moment and then snaked one hand down to hold his lover's cock steady, pushing himself down on his dick a moment later with a loud groan. "Ah yeah!"

Kyo whined a little when Die pulled away, having just gotten good and worked up again. What came next had him letting out a stage worthy sound as Die's tight body engulfed his length unexpectedly, taking his breath away. With his arms and legs bound and eyes covered, he could only focus on the way Die's body felt. It was amazing and he arched his back, groaning. "Die... oh... fuck... _yes_!"

Die shifted down over him, carefully starting to move himself on Kyo's cock, just shifting his hips rather than actually moving up and down on it, feeling it more intimate this way. "Ah, gods, Kyo," he breathed out, making it so obvious that he'd needed to fuck like this.

Kyo's arms flexed and tugged at the ropes as Die moved on him, a moan sliding past his lips. His lover's body was always amazing but like this, with him in control, it was indescribable. "Hnn... Die... so good...”

Die worked himself up quickly, knowing all the right ways to please himself on Kyo's cock like this. It really wasn't all that difficult to get himself aroused to the point he wanted nothing more than to cum, but he did it in a way he knew would share with Kyo all his favorite moves, all the right places to aim, all of it.

After only a few minutes, he threw back his head and groaned, rocking Kyo's cock, pressing it right into his prostate over and over. "Oh baby... oh fuck," he breathed out, "tell me..." he panted, "tell me you fucking want this."

Kyo could only lay there and let Die ride him to his heart's content. He let out a seemingly continuous string of moans as Die worked himself on his cock.

His lover got more and more worked up, fueling his own desires, pushing him towards the edge. "Gods... yes... I want this so fucking bad!"

Die groaned at Kyo's response, shoving himself forward on Kyo's cock a few times and then finally letting himself go and bouncing on Kyo's lapt, letting out a couple of choked moans and then a sharp cry as he started to cum, spurting all over Kyo's abdomen as he continued to move.

Kyo gasped out as Die's movement became more frantic. He struggled against his binds, writhing against the bed as Die bounced on him. "Ah fuck Die..." 

It was only a moment more before felt his lover's body clenched around his cock then warm cum was spurting out over his stomach. He groaned, his cock twitching with need.

Die all but collapsed on Kyo, whimpering a little bit and then sighing softly as he came down from the whole thing. After a moment, he reached to release Kyo's ankles. "Do your worst to me," he murmured softly.

Kyo groaned softly when Die collapsed against him. He longed to reach out and touch his lover, finding that being unable to was torture in its own way. 

When Die released his ankles, he let a sound then drew his knees up, waiting a moment then pushing upward, thrusting into Die's body with a moan.  
Die grunted softly, leaning forward and releasing one of Kyo's hands as he allowed his lover to use him to obtain his orgasm. "C'mon baby... fuck me and cum."

Kyo immediately dug that hand into Die's hair, holding onto it as he pushed up harder into his lover's pliant body. It didn't take him much longer before he was letting out a loud cry, snapping his hips up hard then cumming, filling Die's entrance with his cum. "Ahh, fuck... _Die_!"

Die huffed out a soft pleased breath as the other shoved up into him and then started to cum. He slid himself down on his lover, leaning in and kissing him deeply before releasing the blindfold and sitting back enough to peer down at his lover. "I love you, baby."

Kyo let out a soft sound, kissing Die back deeply, stroking his hand through his lover's red hair. "Hnn... I love you, too..."

Die reached up and released Kyo's other cuff, smirking softly as he patted Kyo's cheek. "So how badly _did_ I freak you out?"

Kyo let out a sigh of relief when his other hand was freed. He took the opportunity to shift to a slightly sitting up position, groaning a little. "Hnn... just slightly..."

Die leaned down to nuzzle him a little and then sat back up, smiling softly at him. "I wouldn't actually harm you like that, baby, I promise."

Kyo smiled a little, reaching out to run his hand over Die's arm, nodding. "I know..." He shivered a little, the ropes shifted and rubbing against his skin slightly.

Die reached down, lighting tugging at three different points, the ropes loosening and then falling away. He wasn't good enough yet for a single point release, but he was at least well-read on the subject. "So..." he ran his fingers over the delicate patters on Kyo's skin from the ropes, smirking a little.

Kyo shifted a little, smiling as the ropes fell away easily. "Hmm?" He slid his hand up Die's thigh, stroking it lightly.

"Have you had your fill yet?" he asked quietly, moving his hands to run over the other's biceps and then over his pecs.

Kyo licked his lips and looked up at Die for a long moment before nodding his head, knowing this wasn't exactly easy for him. He reached up and tugged Die down gently, kissing him again. "Thank you."

Die smiled at the response, carefully nuzzling into Kyo's neck and then yawning, glancing back at the other two sandwich halves. "Want to polish that off?"

Kyo glanced at them then shook his head. "Nah, I'm good...but I do have to pee..."

Die offered the other a tiny smirk and then slid off the bed, offering Kyo his hand since his lover had been tied up there. He knew he shouldn't leave him alone for a while now, given that he had left him there for so long and he wasn't about to be an idiot about it, not whatsoever.

Kyo took Die's hand and pulled himself up, taking a moment slip his arms around Die's waist and pull him close, needing the contact of his lover skin to skin, something about it rather intimate.

Die held Kyo there for a long few moments, smiling softly and then gently kissing the top of Kyo's head before leading him toward the bathroom, looking pleased with himself.

Kyo hummed softly as he followed along with Die to the bathroom, moving to the toilet once they were there.

Die slid up onto the counter, knowing he should probably look away and not be a pervert right then, but not really able to monitor himself in that instant as much as he usually could. He glanced at the other man and then flushed slightly, looking away again.

Kyo glanced over at Die, grasping his cock and aiming it towards the toilet. He hesitated for a moment then looked at Die again, chuckling lowly. "You've got about 5 seconds to do something..."

The guitarist glanced between Kyo and his dick and then away again, worrying his lower lip. On one hand, he wanted desperately to have Kyo claim him in much the same way he'd just claimed the vocalist. But on the other hand, he was a bit worried that he wasn't supposed to be putting his kinky bullshit off on the other right then.

Torn between the two, he finally just looked back at Kyo, allowing himself to at least watch for the time being.

Kyo read the slew of emotions on Die's face, seeing the dilemma and the ultimate decision there. He smiled softly and shifted forward, proceeding with emptying his bladder with a soft sigh. 

It took him a minute to finish then he shook off and grabbed some toilet paper, dabbing the tip then tossing the paper in the toilet and flushing it before moving to rinse his hands. 

He looked in the mirror for a moment, sliding his hand up and over the faint bruises on his neck, perfect imprints of Die's hand. His gaze traveled downward, taking in a few spots here and there where the rope had left a mark, as well as to the cuts on his thigh. He caught Die's eye through the mirror, smiling softly.

Die pushed himself off the counter when Kyo finished up and then moved to quickly fill their tub with water, adding in some bubbles and oils, knowing it was silly to have bubbles, but he honestly still liked them.

He returned the smile to Kyo and pulled the other toward him. "I love you, sweetheart."

Kyo watched Die prepare the bath, sniffing the oils appreciatively, various aches in his body letting him know that this would feel rather nice. 

He leaned in to Die, nuzzling against his neck. "Mm, I love you, too, baby."

Die waited until it was halfway full and then stepped in, sitting down and offering his hand to Kyo, not wanting to have the other away from him for too long.

Kyo eagerly stepped into the tub as well, almost immediately shifting to lean against Die's chest, shivering a little at the contrast between the warm water and cool air of the bathroom.

Die pulled Kyo against him and slid his arms around him. "You're the most gorgeous man I've ever known," he murmured as he began to lightly rub his fingers over the other's abdomen.

Kyo sighed softly, bringing his hands to rest atop Die's forearms, tilting his head back to kiss his lover's jaw. "Hnn... I appreciate the compliment but I have to argue that that's impossible when you hold the position instead."

"Awww," Die murmured softly. "Thank you, baby," he murmured quietly, shifting and then settling down once again. "What did you like best about this whole thing?"

Kyo rested his head on Die's shoulder, closing his eyes, hands idly dipping into the water to rub along Die's arms. He hummed softly at the question, considering it carefully. 

"The utter trust I felt with your hand around my throat, choking the life from me while bringing me so much pleasure."

Die let out a soft hum and then leaned his head back against the rim of the tub. "You... are the most amazing person on the face of this planet, baby."

Kyo ran his hand up along Die's arm then down over his thigh, sighing softly. "Hnn..."


	39. Chapter 39

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

The whole band had been forced to an industry party that night, much to Kyo's displeasure. He'd had no choice though and now he found himself sitting on a couch alone, a rare drink in hand. 

Die had been pulled away by some fellow guitarist or other, leaving Kyo to his own devices. He tried not to feel any jealousy toward the lanky man that currently had his arm casually draped over his lover's shoulders, but he could feel it bubbling just beneath the surface. 

He huffed and downed the drink in his hand then pushed himself up, heading for the bar and ordering something stronger. Maybe he could drown that green eyed monster before it escaped and he fucked up with Die again. 

This time, instead of going back to his couch, he settled at the bar, sipping the too strong alcohol as he looked around the crowd. There were familiar faces, but none of which he wished to strike up a conversation with and so he just sat there, finishing off his drink in no time and mindlessly ordering another. 

This proved to be a mistake, or rather, a miscalculation on his part. He knew he couldn't hold his liquor very well and as he tilted his head back to take the first sip of the third drink, his world shifted sideways. He blinked and shook his head then laughed a little, finding that rather comical in his own mind. 

"I think... I'm drunk," he said to no one in particular, shifting off his stool, wobbling a tiny bit then heading for his lover, who was still engaged in an apparently fascinating conversation.

Die had been completely pulled aside by one of his fellow comrades and the other hadn't let go of him since the very moment he had shown up. Though, at least, the other was seriously at least nice enough.

He was working on his forth drink, aware of the fact that normally he'd have been all the way through a bottle of Jack by this point rather than only partway through his forth watered-down drink. So... this was what progress was, he supposed.

It wasn't but a few minutes before he found that Kyo was heading toward him... on very wobbly legs. Arching his eyebrow, he took his chances given he was in front of only people who were inside his known circle of people who wouldn't... or couldn't... announce to the public about his relationship. He reached out and tugged Kyo to his side, rubbing a hand over his shoulder.

Kyo made a very unmanly sound when Die pulled him close, his booze fogged brain screaming that this wasn't right and they were going to be exposed before he managed to calm down enough and just offer the other person a tight smile. 

He looked up at Die with vaguely glassy eyes and then leaned in to murmur into his ear. "I'm horny and you've been ignoring me all night. Ass." He pulled back with his lips quirked slightly, tongue flicking out to moisten them. 

Alcohol always did one of three things to him. It either knocked him straight out, made him rage like a madman or, and this was tonight's affect, it made him ravenously horny.

Die arched an eyebrow at him, his tongue working over his teeth for a moment of contemplation. He smirked a little and then cleared his throat, looking back at his fellow guitarist. "Something's come up and I need to get going," Die delivered smoothly to the other man.

The elder man gave him an amused look, murmuring, "I bet," before lifting a hand to wave him off. "See ya later."

Die made a soft positive noise and then steered Kyo away from the others and toward the back where he knew he could find Shinya, who had volunteered to remain sober to drive everyone home tonight. "Should have told me sooner," he murmured to Kyo. "You know I'd never neglect you like that."

Kyo offered the other man half a wave then let Die steer him away, unable to help the smirk on his face. "Yes, well... you looked pretty busy being Mr. Social Butterfly over there..."

"Is that jealousy I detect, my love?" He reached to rub his hand over Kyo's hair and then chuckled. "I love you, too."

Kyo batted at Die's hands, stepping away and huffing a little. "Not jealous. Just...tipsy or something." He squinted at Die then waved to Shinya who was currently chatting up some female or other. "He looks busy..."

Die grunted a little. "Well, unless you want to get dirty in the backseat of his car, then he's taking us home anyway."

Kyo looked at Die and wrinkled his nose. "I don't think Shinya's backseat is dirty... unless it has dog hair all over it."

Die paused, turning to stare at the other. "... Seriously?" He laughed and shook his head. "I mean fuck. In his backseat."

Kyo stared at Die then snorted. "Right... he wouldn't appreciate that... even though I would." He glanced at Shinya again then leaned in to Die a little more. "I'd like to ride you in the backseat, even if Shinya was watching," he said lowly, his fingers dancing lightly over Die's arm.

Die honestly could find no flaw in that whatsoever. He sniffed a little and then murmured, "Stay here." He marched right up to Shinya and cleared his throat. "Kyo and I need to go home... now." He glanced at the girl Shinya was talking to and gave her a soft sympathetic look. "I apologize." He leaned over to her and murmured in her ear, "If you give him your number, I'll make sure he calls."

Kyo did as Die bid, though he found that standing still was difficult. He was glad he'd drank as much as he had, if he'd had anymore, he'd likely be a mess right now. 

Shinya looked up as Die walked and gave him a slight frown, turning back to the girl he was chatting up and offering her a slight smile. "This is what I get for offering to be the designated." He slipped his hand into his pocket, and pulled his phone out, handing it to the girl so she could input her number while he turned to talk to Die. "I find it ironic that Kyo's the one that can hardly stay on his feet and you seem mostly sober. An interesting change..."

Die shot Shinya a look and a moment later, she had handed the phone back, making her own exit toward the ladies’ room. He shrugged. "I actually um... admitted I had a problem," he murmured. "So... yeah." He headed back with Shinya toward their vocalist.

Shinya's mouth formed a little "oh" but he didn't comment any further than that. He gave Kyo a once over as they reached the short singer and let out a soft huff. "No defiling my backseat..." With that, he headed for the exit, keys in hand. 

Kyo waved as Shinya came over then gave him an exasperated look. "Party pooper." He looked at Die then turned to follow Shinya, still a tad unsteady on his feet. Die trailed after Shinya and once they were out in the parking lot, he smirked. "So... by defiling, you mean no puking, right?"

Shinya stopped to unlock his car, giving Die a look. "No bodily fluids of any kind, thank you." He opened the back door then slid into the driver's seat, starting the car up and waiting for Die and Kyo to get settled. 

Kyo laughed then shook his head. "Not gonna puke, for sure. Haven't had enough for that."

Die shrugged and glanced at Kyo, looking amused. "I don't plan on there being any... bodily fluids involved in this for a long while."

He slid into the back seat and then strapped in, glancing at Kyo. Once the other had the car started, he smirked. "So um... any chance you'd be interested in watching us fuck?"

Kyo got himself buckled in with minimal difficulty then looked at Die, already squirming in his seat. 

Shinya was about to pull out of his spot when Die asked him the most insane question and he ended up slamming his brakes on. "What?! N-no... No thank you."

Die chuckled. "Ah well... your loss then." He chuckled, reaching for Kyo's leg and running his fingers over his lover's thigh.

Shinya huffed and pulled out, turning and heading down the road. 

Kyo chuckled himself then bit his lip, looking over at Die with dark eyes, shifting in his seat a little.

They were a while down the road before Die dared to speak up again. When he did, he laughed softly. "So... can I ask why the quick answer?"

Shinya glanced in his rearview mirror when Die spoke again, flushing just a bit at the question. "It's nothing personal. I’m just really not into voyeurism... especially between two guys. Dick just doesn't do it for me, y'know?"

Die gave him a nod. "I get ya on that." He chuckled a little and leaned back. "Just... impatient." He huffed a little and squeezed Kyo's thigh harder.

Shinya rolled his eyes at Die then focused on the road again. "Impatient? At least you're getting some. I've been hard up for like a month...” 

Kyo let out a groan when Die squeezed his thigh, his cock twitching in his pants some. He didn't add to the conversation, choosing instead to focus on running his hand up and down Die's arm.

Die cleared his throat. "Call that girl back. She'll give you some, trust me. She looked like she thought it was hot you were willing to give us a ride home." He reached to grab Kyo's cock through his pants, squeezing it, and then letting go of him and returning his hand to the other's thigh.

Shinya hummed softly as he made a turn. "I was going to… I was actually working my way towards the coat closet..." He laughed quietly then reached to turn the radio on to some rock station. 

Kyo barely contained his moan when Die grabbed him, his hips pushing up into his lover's hand then relaxing against the seat once he was released. He licked his lips then shifted, slipping his belt off. "Don't feel good..." With that, he laid his head in Die's lap, facing his crotch rather than the other way.

Die grunted a little and looked down at his lover, worry creasing his brow as he reached to run his hand through Kyo's hair. "Do we need to stop?" he asked quietly.

Kyo shook his head, a smirk playing on his lips as he shifted a bit then nuzzled his nose against Die's crotch, showing that he was faking. Die worked hard to contain his gasp, just keeping his hand in Kyo's hair, licking his lips a little bit as he tilted his head slightly. "Mmm... So.... why've you let it be so long? I mean, I know you can get a girl any time you want one."

Kyo almost cackled, moving to mouth Die through the material of his pants, scraping his teeth over the head of his lover's dick. 

Shinya sniffed a little, unaware of what was happening in his backseat. "Hnn... You would think, but it’s hard to find time when Kaoru's being a slave driver."  
Die's arousal immediately flared and he pushed Kyo's mouth closer to his cock, keeping his hand where it was so as to help shield their actions from view. He was so incredibly turned on by the other doing this after Shinya had expressed not wanting to see it. It was dirtier that way.

He chuckled softly. "Yeah well... typical."

Kyo was careful not to leave a huge wet spot on Die's pants as he mouthed him. He brought a hand up slowly and carefully to tug the zipper of his lover's pants down, revealing his cock him. His eyes shot up to Die's face before he silently grasped the base of his cock, sliding his mouth around the tip and sucking lightly. 

Shinya shrugged, running his fingers through his hair. "It doesn't help when you have someone you want to get with, but they don't know you exist."

Die pushed up into Kyo's mouth the moment it was on his cock, unable to stop his instant desire for his lover's mouth. It felt like utter heaven to him.

After a moment, he looked back up at Shinya and sighed softly. "Trust me... I know. I felt that way for a long time, but... it happens and sometimes good can come out of it. So... can I ask who it is?"

Kyo held back a groan, not wanting to alert Shinya to their current activity. He slowly bobbed his head, sucking as best as he could from this angle. 

Shinya stopped at a light, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel. "Hnn... I usually just end up empty handed with stuff like that... but... anyway. I'll give you a small hint. She's staff..."

Die stared at him for a long moment and then gasped out, "Nora?!"

Kyo almost choked when Die uttered Nora's name. His slightly booze soaked brain taking a few seconds to realize that he was talking to Shinya and _not_ calling out Nora's name by mistake. 

Shinya ducked his head, cheeks flaming hot as Die hit the nail square on the head. He didn't respond, suddenly regretting this conversation quite a bit.  
Die reached to pet Kyo's hair, definitely not wanting the other to think that had been about him. He licked his lips a little and then grunted faintly. "I honestly see no shame in that. She's super sweet." And she had a great ass, but he didn't think Kyo would currently approve of such conversation.

Kyo settled and went back to slowly bobbing his head, pressing his tongue into the slit of Die's cock. He moved his hand to press against his own bulge, hips bucking slightly. 

Shinya was quiet for a moment longer then shrugged a little. "Yeah... I'm just not so sure she'd be interested, and if I were to open that can of worms, it could ruin things..."

Die had to push Kyo into stillness for a long moment, his cock so hard he felt like he was going to burst from the pure excitement of getting blown like this. He shuddered a little and then murmured, "Yeah, true enough... but... I think she'd understand if you did it like... nicely."

Kyo squirmed a little but stilled finally, pulling back off Die's cock to breathe for a moment. He was more than aroused and amused at the entire situation. 

Shinya licked his lips, turning down the street that would take him to Kyo and Die's place. "Perhaps. I don't know... It'd help if I had some idea of her take on it...”

Die bit his lip for a moment and then murmured, "Well... I could... um... ask for you?" He let out a cough at the end, pulling up his zipper, ensuring his cock was in his pants before he did it. He glanced at Kyo and smirked a little at him.  
Kyo bit his tongue to keep from laughing as Die stealthily zipped up. He waited a few moments before sitting up again, yawning a little and smacking his lips. "Mm, almost there?"

Shinya pulled into Die and Kyo's driveway and looked back at Die. "I… well... I guess you could... discretely."

Die nodded as he reached to open the door. "Yeah, I will definitely help you out in that realm. In the meantime... go get laid." He slipped out of the car and reached for Kyo's hand. "Because I'm certainly going to."

Shinya nodded his head, a hint of a blush still on his cheeks. "Will do.." He waved at them, shaking his head. "I bet..." 

Kyo took Die's hand and slid out of the car, his arousal very apparent now that he was standing, the front of his slacks tented out vaguely. "See ya Shin, thanks for the ride."

Die licked his lips a little bit and then chuckled, reaching toward Kyo and tugging him along with him toward the house. Once on the front step, he paused there, waiting on Shinya to drive off, getting the door unlocked but not open. He smirked at Kyo and then grabbed the front of his shirt. "Oh my god, you minx." He opened the door and stumbled in backwards, slamming the door back as he pushed Kyo against the wall right there in the foyer. "Baby, sweetie... oh my god, I'm horny."

Kyo stumbled as Die pulled him forward, groaning when he was pushed against it. He licked his lips and stared at Die. "Then fuck me, Die..."

"Not yet," Die purred out quietly, reaching to quickly undo Kyo's pants, pushing them down around his thighs and then grabbed his ass, groaning as he fondled both handfuls of it. With a grunt, he pushed against him, starting to hump him through his jeans. "Ah yeah... oh fuck, baby... wanted to do this for a while now," he admitted softly in Kyo's ear.

Kyo whined a little then groaned, letting his head drop back against the door as Die's jean covered cock pushed against his bared one. "A-ah... Gods... Die..." He brought his hands up to grip Die's upper arms, pushing his hips forward against him.

Die held onto him hard, humping him hard for a few minutes before finally relenting, just reaching down to fumble open his pants, revealing his cock. He simply moved forward, thrusting his cock against the other's crack, moaning. He bent over a little bit and worked up some spit, letting it drip down over Kyo's entrance and his cock, doing it again and again until he felt it was enough, then finally took hold of the base of his cock, rather abruptly pushing into his tight heat. "FUCK!"

Kyo braced himself against the wall, moaning lewdly when he felt Die's spit drip down his crack, his legs automatically spreading slightly. 

He was getting impatient by the time Die had done this three or four times and opened his mouth to sass him about it when white hot pleasure washed over him. He cried out, pain and pleasure mixing to create the perfect combination as Die's cock sank into his eager body. "O-oh fuck... Gods... _Die_!"

Die chuckled as he pushed into him, over and over, panting slightly as he began to thrust into the other's body. "Shit, baby... oh my god, you're amazingly tight!"

Kyo moaned loudly as he pushed his hips back against Die, his hand reaching back to catch Die's, bringing it to his lips and drawing one finger into his mouth, sucking it lewdly. 

He was so damn hard it hurt but he wanted more. Releasing Die's finger, he cried out. "Fuck me, harder!"

Die grunted, letting Kyo do what he wanted with his hand. But after the other cried out for more, he grabbed his hips with both hands, readjusted their stance, and began to pound into him with all he had.  
Kyo let out an inhuman scream as Die started fucking him, practically shoving him against the wall.

He braced himself against it, head thrown back in passion, his breath coming in pants. "Die... fuck... yes... don't stop!"

Die let out a groan, fucking him harder, reaching around to jack Kyo off almost frantically. "C'mon, baby... oh my god... fucking cum on the goddamned wall for me!" He was already close himself and he just wanted the other to cum hard for him. "Please!"

Kyo lost it the minute Die's hand wrapped around his aching cock. He snapped his hips forward then cried out, cumming hard, his release spraying the wall in front of him. " _Fuck_ , YES!”

Die groaned as he continued to thrust into the other's body, feeling him clamping down as he came. "Fuck yes, baby!" He groaned and then began to fuck him harder, so ready to cum, his heart pounding in his chest.

Kyo moaned, bracing himself against the wall, his inner muscles clenching and unclenching around Die's length. "D-die… fuck!"

Die stayed there for a moment before pulling out ever so slowly and chuckling softly. "Hnn... how was it, sweetheart?"

Kyo shuddered, slumping against the wall, letting out a moan. "Gods baby..." He slowly shifted and turned around, reaching out to pull Die to him, kissing him hard and deep.

Die pulled the other into his arms and smirked softly, kissing him back the moment he had his mouth against him.

Kyo dragged his hand through Die's hair then pulled back, nipping at his bottom lip. "Gods, I can't ever get enough of you..."

Die smiled at him. "Seriously, I can't get enough of you either, so... the feeling is mutual." He leaned in to kiss him once again and then grabbed his ass hard.   
"By the way, secretly blowing me in Shinya's car drove me fucking nuts."

Kyo smirked, pressing against Die. "Yeah? I wanted to make you cum... right then and there... all down my throat in Shinya's car."

"But then I wouldn't have been able to fuck you like you wanted, now would I?" he asked, smirking and reaching to rub Kyo's hair. "Also... remind me to give you half my drinks from now on. Because this... is an awesome result."

Kyo smirked a little, trailing his hand down Die's chest. "Hnn, I'd have gotten you worked up again..." He let out a laugh then licked his lips. "I'll have to keep that in mind..."

"I'm certain you would have. Now come on, we look silly standing around in the entryway with our pants around our ankles."

Kyo laughed and turned, heading for the stairs after stepping out of his pants, the slightest wobble to his steps.

Die just watched him go, an amused little look on his face as he hitched his own back up and ditched his shoes, going to get Kyo's shoes out of his pants and tossing them back into the entryway. "You... are fucking adorable when drunk, baby."

Kyo glanced back and Die and grinned, leaning against the stair rail. "Hnn... You think so?" He shook his rear a bit then headed on up the stairs. "I'm not even drunk drunk... maybe I should have more."

Die snorted. "Trust me... you're drunk," he murmured as he followed after the other, licking his lips.

Kyo stopped once he was at the top of the stairs, leaning against the rail and gazing down at Die. "Am not..." He grinned widely, tapping his fingers on the wall.

"Are, too," Die replied, coming up the stairs and taking Kyo, guiding him away from the railing and toward the bedroom. At the last moment, he detoured toward the bathroom and then guided him inside, pushing him toward the sink. "Brush your teeth and wash up."

Kyo huffed a little but let Die lead him along, obediently stepping into the bathroom and up to the sink on Die's orders. He stopped there though and glanced at his lover in the mirror with a smirk. “Why should I brush my teeth when I'm just gonna end up with your cock in my mouth?"

Die arched an eyebrow at him and then chuckled. "Yes, well... go ahead and brush them anyway." He leaned over to peck his cheek.

Kyo shrugged and went about the task quickly then spat into the sink, missing a little as his vision went a little blurry as if the alcohol was sloshing around in his head. He stood there for a moment, holding the counter then stepped back. He looked at Die for a moment then moved over to the toilet in a bit of a hurry. "Gotta piss!"

Die was leaning on the wall, watching Kyo, a small smirk on his lips as the other weaved around on the spot. He shook his head a little bit and then laughed as Kyo headed toward the toilet. He almost opened his mouth to have Kyo do something dirty, but after a moment of deliberation, he decided that it would be wrong to use a drunken Kyo for his pleasures like that, given he wasn't sure how sober Kyo would have thought of what he wanted. He supposed he might should have thought of that before taking Kyo earlier, but it was obvious he'd wanted him at least.

Instead, he settled in a slightly different position so he could watch him.  
Kyo took several moments to relieve himself, a seemingly unending stream of piss leaving his body until he was supporting himself against the wall. Finally, he finished up and shook off, grabbing some toilet paper to dab any leftover then went back to the sink to wash his hands. 

"Hnn… am I good enough, now?"

Die almost groaned as he watched how much Kyo had in him, vowing that next time before his lover was drunk, he'd tell him what he had in mind, see if he agreed or not, and then pull the card later if he still wanted it.

After a few more moments, he held out his hand to the other. "You're always good enough, I just thought you'd like to be able to wake up without that horrible after-drink taste in your mouth. By the way... have you had any water?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose then took Die's hand, moving to stand by him. "Hmm... water... does ice count?" He squinted up at Die then leaned in to kiss his neck lightly. "C'mon... I'm getting cold standing here naked..."

"No, it doesn't." He reached over to fill a cup with water and pressed it into Kyo's spare hand. "Come on, baby. Drink this... slowly. And we'll go to the bedroom. Does the bed sound nice?"

Kyo hummed and took the water, sipping it. "Mm, yeah, it does sound nice..." He leaned against Die slightly, slowly drinking the water like Die bid him to, knowing it'd be better for him in the morning. Unfortunately, a hangover was unavoidable for him due to the fact that he so rarely drank. 

He finished off the water after a few minutes then moved to fill up the cup again himself before all but tugging Die from the bathroom, heading for their bedroom. "When I'm sick in the morning, you'll take pity on me... right?"

Die regarded Kyo as he spoke about being sick in the morning. He knew those mornings a little too well for his own good and he definitely didn't want to have any incidents like some of his in the past. He grabbed the trashcan from the bathroom and followed after him. "Sure thing."

He settled on the bed and sighed softly, putting the trashcan next to Kyo's side of the bed. "Puke here or the bathroom. Nowhere else. Got it?"

Kyo stared at the trashcan like it was his enemy then nodded, saluting Die. "Got it. Now, can we stop talking about puke and move on to... better things?"   
He grinned then climbed into Die's lap, kissing his lover lightly on the lips. "You're kinda sexy when you're all in control..."

Die once again managed to look shocked as he stared at Kyo as he climbed onto his lap. He coughed a little and then flushed, grabbing Kyo's hips. "Mmm... I'm glad you think so... and better things?"

Kyo chuckled lowly, leaning in to nuzzle Die's neck, nipping then sucking the skin just above his collarbone. "Mm, yes...better things." He shifted his hips, rocking against Die slightly as he drug his mouth up along the vein in Die's neck, stopping to tug on his earlobe. 

Die let out a soft laugh, rubbing his palms up the others back over and over. "Damn... someone's horny." He laughed softly.

Kyo laughed against Die's ear, flicking his tongue into it then reaching up to dig his fingers in Die's hair, tugging his head back so he run his tongue over Die's exposed Adam's apple before scraping his teeth over it. "Mm, want to mark you as _mine_."

Die let out a little hiss and then closed his eyes. "Mmm... okay, baby... then mark me... just... remember I only have 2 days to not show it on stage, yeah?"

Kyo groaned then ducked his head, planting his lips against the juncture of Die's shoulder and neck, kissing and sucking the area lightly at first before sinking his teeth in, sucking harder, bringing the blood the surface to make it bruise, his hips moving a little more frantically against Die.

Die felt almost overwhelmed as the other went after him. He licked his lips slightly as he grabbed Kyo's ass and squeezed it harshly. "Shit, baby... tell me how horny you are..."

Kyo let out a moan and leaned back, sliding his hands over Die's shoulders. "Hnng... I need you so bad, baby." He licked his lips, gazing at Die. "I'm so damn hard and I need your dick in my ass _now_."

Die let out a soft groan as Kyo confessed his desire to him. It was incredibly arousing to him that Kyo was being so vocal about his needs when he was drunk like this. He chuckled softly and then flopped back, taking Kyo with him. "C'mon, baby... then take me out and mount me."

Kyo smirked and shifted down on Die's legs once he was laid back. He hurriedly unfastened the other's pants, tugging them down enough to free his cock. He licked his lips and grinned up at Die before dipping his head down to swipe his tongue over the head.

He then scooted up and reached back, grasping his lover's cock and slowly lowering himself onto it, dropping his head back in pleasure once he was fully seated. "Oh Gods, _yes_ Die!" He raised himself then slid back down, moaning. "Your cock feels so damn good in me..."

Die gasped when the other licked at him, not having expected that given what they'd just been doing before that. However, he knew the other probably wasn't really thinking about it so much.

He bucked his hips up a little bit as Kyo slid onto his dick. "Oh my god," he hissed out, "Fucking hell, Kyo..."

Kyo shifted and leaned forward, pressing his hands to Die's chest as he stared down at his lover, raising and lowering his hips with increasing speed, a lewd moan slipping from his lips.

Die's eyes followed Kyo's every movement, watching as his lover bounced on his lap, letting the pleasure rush through him. "Oh my god," he breathed out, "oh holy fucking _yes_!"

The vocalist shifted forward, leaning down to take one of Die's nipples into his mouth, nipping it rather sharply as he bucked his hips in such a way that his cock was rubbing against Die's stomach. "Ah… Die… fuck!"

Die moaned quietly, shivering as the other slid over him. "Right there, baby... come on," he murmured softly.

Kyo slid both hands over Die's chest then planted them on either side of his head, rotating his hips for a moment then resuming the rocking motion he'd been doing before. "Gods... so fucking close... cum in me, Die. Fill me up with your jizz," he moaned out lewdly.

Die licked his lips a little, watching Kyo ride him, really getting off on seeing him do this. He shivered slightly. "Hnn..." he murmured quietly, his hips arching up. "Dear god, sweetheart."

Kyo whined a little and sat back, reaching to grab Die's hands and place them on his chest in a silent request. He leaned back a little, moving one hand to brace himself on Die's thigh, changing the angle slightly so that his lover's cock brushed against his prostate.

The guitarist slid his hands up over the other's chest, grasping his nipples and after giving the other a wicked look, he twisted his nipples harshly. Kyo's breath hitched when Die grasped his nipples then flooded out in a scream when the sensitive buds were twisted, his cock twitching from the pleasure pain. "Fuck! Die! Yes!"

Die let out a soft snarl, plucking hard at the other's nipples and then reaching up to grasp his throat, though the touch was almost teasingly light.  
Kyo finally lost it as Die's hand slid over his throat. He raised up then slammed himself down hard on Die's cock before cumming, not even touching himself as he spurted out across Die's stomach. "Fuck!!"

Die watched his lover as he came hard across his chest, smirking a little. He gave Kyo a few moments before he rolled them over and curled himself around Kyo's body, slowly thrusting his hips, mostly grinding his hips as he trailed light kisses over Kyo's shoulder and throat.

Kyo shuddered as he finished, leaning forward to rest his hands on Die's chest. He groaned as he was flipped over, shifting to wrap his arms around Die's shoulders, his hips pushing up slightly. "Hnn... baby..."

Die continued for quite a while and then finally groaned as he stilled inside his lover, thick spurts of cum filling his lover's passage. Kyo moaned softly as he felt Die's release filling him, his arms moving to wrap around Die's shoulders as he buried his face against his neck. 

He was truly exhausted by this point, all of the drunken energy flooded out with his last orgasm and now he could barely keep his eyes open. 

He pressed soft kisses to Die's throat, murmuring against it. "Love you..."

Die smiled softly against Kyo's shoulder. "Mmm... I love you, too, baby... so fucking much."

Kyo smiled then closed his eyes, promptly passing out, his whole body going slack beneath Die's.


	40. Chapter 40

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta Readers: cadkitten, eilonwe2

The hours had passed them by, days turning into weeks, into months as time slid forward. As a unit, the band progressed back into the unit they had once been, pressing onward with enthusiasm as giant as the day they had first started.

Somewhere in the swirl of the entire thing, personal lives had been cast as secondary, reduced to fleeting moments stolen in the heat of aftermath. And yet... deep inside of Die burned the desire for more, to find what he most needed in a moment once again, and to feel something deeper than flesh against his own.

And with that as his basis, he spent every single waking moment in which he had alone time researching one very finite thing: his desires for his and Kyo's official union. When, at last, he felt that he had enough information to even begin to present it to Kyo, he finally found a three day break in their schedule and on the first night, drew Kyo into the living room, a smile on his face. "C'mere, baby."

It was with some surprise that Kyo followed Die into the living room after being drawn out of his thoughts, focused on the previous night's show and what he could do for the next as well as the content for his new webpage. 

Still, he didn't hesitate to remove himself from his desk at Die's bidding and walk with his lover to their living room. "Mm, what is it?"  
Die settled on the couch, crossing his legs and drawing his laptop across them. He smiled up at his lover. "I've been meaning to get you alone for a while... to discuss..." he crooked a finger at him, "Come sit."

Kyo raised an eyebrow, wondering what Die wanted to discuss. He moved over to curl up next to him on the couch, leaning against his side some, feeling the need to be close. "Oh, and what is it we're discussing?"

Die brought up his browser, glancing over at Kyo and then scooting to put one arm around his shoulders. "Our wedding." He waited, his breath held, gauging Kyo's reaction.

Kyo looked at the browser and then to Die, smiling a little at the thought of Die having been researching things much like an anxious bride. "Our wedding, hm? And... what about it?" He looked expectantly at his lover, waiting for his response, curious about how far Die had gotten into this.

Die actually had the grace to blush a little bit, licking his lips a little bit. "Well... I've been researching things and I wanted to share what all I've gotten so far. So... um... where do you want to start? Details? General concept?"

Kyo couldn't help the little chuckle that escaped him as he leaned up and kissed Die on the cheek. "General concept and then details?" he answered then flicked his eyes back to Die again. "...and please tell me that you didn't plan it at Disneyland..."

Die looked vaguely appalled for a moment and then shook his head. "No, sir." He sighed and then pursed his lips. "I haven't really planned any of it just yet because I don't want to plan things without you, baby."

Kyo looked a little too relieved and nodded. "Good... carry on then, love." He shifted a little and tucked his feet beneath him.

Die licked his lips a little bit and then opened the first folder of options up in the browser windows. "So we have several viable options for places that are legal and... um... outside the radar of Japan, so hopefully still keep our personal business personal. New York, so some of my family is already there, easy enough warning for family here, we know the place at least a little..." he shrugged a little. "Sweden, because... well... Sweden. Spain, Holland, or Canada." He'd sort of ruled out a few of the other places, costs simply not making sense for the whole thing, given that the house alone had exhausted a great chunk of his and Kyo's savings.

Kyo peered at the list of places, rubbing his chin a little. "Hmm, well, my mother always wanted to visit Canada... New York has a pretty large fan base in it... I'd kinda feel... well, exposed."

Die gave a nod. "Canada it is!" He smiled at the other and then tilted his head a little. "Still not sure on the specifics of any ideas for the ceremony, honestly. But... do you have any ideas on it?" he asked softly.

Kyo nodded then looked slightly pained. He knew Die wanted something like this to be really special and he did, too. However, he was also in favor of simplicity and a quiet affair. "Well, if it were up to me... it would be something small... but... I'm willing to settle for something formal and elegant."

Die chuckled softly. "I was aiming for small... I can't guarantee quiet, because well... some of the required guests are quite loud." He smirked and squeezed Kyo's shoulder, closing off everything except the Canada tab and deleting the folder he'd been using, making a new one labeled _Decisions_ before saving the link there. Next, he opened an entire folder of invitations.

"I was more asking like... what... type of ceremony? Religious? Not? What types of words... that kind of thing."

Kyo made a little face then stared at the invitations, shaking his head, finding it hard to believe that they knew that many people that they could trust to invite to their ceremony.

Licking his lips, he thought about it for a moment. "Mm... Somewhat traditional style? And... simple vows..." He looked to Die, wondering if this was okay.

Die nodded, "That sounds fantastic to me. Keep it short and sweet, focus on the concept and the family and friends and most importantly," he squeezed Kyo a bit, "us."

He began to flip through the invitations, showing Kyo each one in turn. "I was thinking... black, white, red, and silver, yes?"

Kyo smiled a little, feeling relieved that he and Die were on the same page there. When the other brought up invitations, he looked at each option, chewing his lip a little. "Mm, I like the colors… it's very much... us." He thought about it for a moment then gently pushed Die's hand away so he could preview each one longer. "I think I like this one, here. The second option."

Die nodded a little as he looked over the black envelopes, simple white invitations set on red paper, and a red ribbon tied over them. "It's the simplest idea and... the least girly." He glanced at the other two again, both of them having somewhat feminine notes to them, though it was admittedly hard to find things that were masculine in wedding arrangements.

He peered at Kyo and then cleared his throat. "I've sort of... found what I'd like to do with the reception, but I want to clear it with you. I hope... that's okay?" There was an edge of excitement to the words that he couldn't quite contain.

Kyo chuckled softly and nodded. "Yes, I was thinking the same thing about them being a touch... feminine." His lover's next statement had him raising his eyebrows, the smile still on his lips. "It's fine with me, go right ahead with what you've got. The excitement I see in your eyes is adorable."

Die blushed again and then cleared his throat, opening a few images he'd found. The first one showed tables all dressed up in black, red strips of cloth hanging off every other place setting, simple champagne flutes at each setting and square plates. The center table runner was a mixture of black, white, and silver and chairs were draped in alternating black and red, looking far more elegant than they were without them.

And the best part in his opinion was the centerpieces. Red rose petals surrounding four cylindrical glasses, four of them in point around the tallest one, in which a red rose was submerged in the gel inside it. The outer four glasses each contained a single white candle making for simple, but elegant... and not really expensive. He showed the other the combination of photos, explaining what he wanted from each. "Isn't it glorious?"

Kyo peered at the images, finding the settings to somehow be a perfect mix of him and Die. The red and black working together to make it elegant rather than dark and the centerpieces managed to be beautiful but again were not overtly feminine. 

He found himself shifting forward, looking closer, and imagining how this could really be. "Yes, baby, this is... this is actually perfect." His voice held a note of emotion.

Die licked his lips a little bit and then grinned. "Hurray!" He laughed just after and leaned in to kiss Kyo on the nose before saving those to the folder for his decisions. "And... um... cake." He opened up two options, having narrowed it down significantly. The first one was of a white, four-tiered round cake, elegant sakura blossoms running up the side in white, the branches in brown. He found it to be elegant and yet somehow still masculine. And the second option was a three-tiered white cake, sitting upon a silver pedestal with red and black ribbons around each layer, red roses for accents in very strategic places.

Kyo laughed softly, wrinkling his nose then shifting, watching Die open up more photos and then studying the cakes. He chewed his lip as he considered them both, finding that he liked them almost equally. "Mm, what if... on the sakura blossoms, some were red?"

Die looked honestly pleased with this idea, his eyes lighting up. "Like a light smattering of red ones?"

Kyo nodded, reaching out to point out some of the blossoms. "Maybe not even red but a very dark maroon… nearly black... but not..."

"Hnn," Die saved it with a little note attached, licking his lips a little bit. 

"That's... really all I have right now," he murmured, closing some things and accidentally opening another link labeled as "Shirts", which turned out to be a video of two men engaged in frottage with one another. Die let out a gasp and quickly moved to try and close the window. "Oh shit!"

Kyo nodded then gaped at the window before letting out a loud laugh. "Oh, oh baby... is that our honeymoon plans?" He smirked at Die, unable to help it.  
Die managed to get it closed, though he was rather red in the face by the time he was done. "I... uh... yeah... sure, we'll go with that!" he hissed out, closing his browser least he give away any more of his secrets.

Kyo laughed again then leaned over, kissing Die's cheek lightly. "About that... the honeymoon I mean... do you have anything in mind?"

Die cleared his throat, trying to get some amount of dignity back after that. "Um... well, not yet. I mean, I have wild ideas, but we both know it has to be discrete."

Kyo nodded, shifted and leaning back. He was completely ignoring Die's porn for the sake of the topic of conversation though he was still rather amused. 

"I'd like to go somewhere I've never been before... but... barring that... anywhere with you is fine." He smiled at Die, reaching up to push a strand of hair from his face.

"Yeah, I'd like to go somewhere we haven't been before, too. And not somewhere completely cliché." He shrugged a little and then shifted, putting the computer on the table and staring at it like it had somehow offended him. He just couldn't let the fact that he'd clicked on porn go. He pursed his lips a little bit and then leaned his head back. "Um..." he stared at the computer for a moment and then sighed.” I guess you know my secret hiding places for porn now, don't you?" He snorted.

Kyo nodded then looked at Die, grinning a little. "Mm, yes... but when did you move it from the "pants" folder?"

Die's face turned even redder and he licked his lips. "Uh... like a month ago. I... rotate."

Kyo snorted softly then shrugged. "It's been at least that long since I looked..." He had the good sense to look slightly guilty. "Er... I was... in a mood one night and figured you'd have some of the good stuff... so..." He gestured to the computer.

Die stared at Kyo for about twenty seconds before he just started laughing, dropping his head back. "Oh my god... you probably got an eyeful of shit you never ever wanted to see or know. I almost feel bad for you!"

Kyo raised his hand, shaking his head. "No, I was very… very, careful... though that one with the chick in it was... yeah, no." He laughed a little then peered at Die, head tilting slightly. "How much of that is fap fodder and how much of it is just 'interesting'?"

Die blinked at Kyo, wondering exactly which 'chick' one he was talking about. At the question, he licked his lips a little bit and then murmured, "Um... well... I guess I'm sort of odd in my porn tastes. I like things that make me sort of... I dunno... feel... different?" He shrugged, looking strange like he had no idea what he was actually talking about.

"So... if you've only been through my links... you have no idea where the best parts are, do you?"

Kyo blinked a little then shrugged. "Okay... I guess I can get that... the forbidden crap or whatever…" He wasn't a stranger to looking up bizarre or out of the norm porn to get off. 

He licked his lips a little and shook his head. "Ah... no, I guess not... if they aren't in there..."

Die debated for a moment and then murmured, "Videos folder, show hidden files, the one labeled Under the Sea, password is prawn, all lower case." He flicked a glance at Kyo. "Stay out of the one labeled Freaky or you'll probably regret it."

Kyo raised an eyebrow then nodded slightly, wondering just how freaky the "Freaky" folder was. "Got it..." He shifted then leaned into Die, glancing over at him. "Somehow, I love the way you still get embarrassed over your porn..."

Die chewed his lower lip for a moment and then gave Kyo a half smirk. "Dude... with some of the shit I watch... it's not a far stretch to being embarrassed that I have it." He tilted his head back. "I found your magazine collection a few weeks ago, but to be honest, I was too embarrassed to look through it, I just shoved it back and tried to pretend like I never found it."

Kyo snorted then blushed slightly, ducking his head. "Gods, Die... that is some of the most vanilla porn. I mean... aside from some bondage... I don't think it even qualifies as porn." He hesitated then shrugged. "The really kinky stuff is elsewhere. I hardly even think of it now..."

Die glanced at the other and then blinked. "Don't think of porn or don't think of the magazines?"

Kyo shook his head. "The magazines... you're all the kink I need, lately." He grinned at Die before leaning up and catching his lips in a kiss.

For a moment, Die honestly had to feel like maybe he was too much by having so much porn when he had Kyo as well. But the truth of the matter was, he'd finally done research on it and apparently a lot of men got even hornier when they were getting regular sex. So it wasn't actually surprising that he found himself jerking off more often than not. He didn't have time to actually think any more on it because Kyo was kissing him. He tugged him close, kissing him deeply with a soft moan.

Kyo smirked a little into the kiss, his fingers sliding into silky red locks, tugging them slightly. He pulled back a bit to nibble Die's bottom lip then soothed it with his tongue before speaking. "The truth is, baby, I find it hard to concentrate on porn when all I ever do is put your gorgeous face in their place..."

Die's mouth fell open slightly and he found himself grinning after a moment. "Oh my god, really?" He reached for Kyo's cheeks, gently squishing them.  
Die's reaction was not what he'd been expecting and he wrinkled his nose as his cheeks were squished. "Well, yes...most of the time, anyway..."

"God you're fucking adorable!" Die announced, reaching to haul Kyo onto his lap. After a moment, he ducked his head a little bit and then murmured, "I admit, I'm horny... again." Though, at least this time it had been three days since they'd touched one another in a sexual sort of manner, so he didn't feel nearly as foolish as he sometimes did.

Kyo let out an "oomph" when Die pulled him into his lap then he shifted, settling a leg on either side of Die's. "I know..." He smirked a little and shifted forward, pressing against Die slightly. "The topic of conversation can have that effect..."

Die let out a soft chuckle and tilted his head back. "Mmm... well, I have to admit, the conversation is only part of it." He closed his eyes and then wet his lips slightly. "I'm glad we're working things out for the wedding... and that you don't think I'm completely mental actually wanting to do this."

Kyo let a deeply chuckle rumble out before dipping his head forward, pressing light kisses over Die's Adam's apple then travelling up to his jaw. "Mm, I don't think so... if anything, Koi, I know it means a lot to you... and I want you to be happy above all else."

Die pursed his lips a little bit and then sighed softly. "Is it what you really want though?" He placed one hand on the back of Kyo's head, trying to keep him in area, enjoying what he was doing and finding it easier to hold this candid conversation without being stared at.

Kyo took a few moments to nip and lick along Die's jawline, moving to tug his earlobe lightly before letting out a soft laugh. "I didn't, at first... the idea of a ceremony was rather daunting... but... now, I...." He paused for a moment, dipping his head down to nuzzle into Die's neck. "Now I want it to be... official."

Die wasn't entirely certain how to feel about Kyo's words, his heart aflutter with the idea that perhaps there was something about him that wasn't entirely what Kyo was seeking in his life pushing at the forefront of his mind. He tried to hide it well, always had, but his insecurities ran deeper than most people could ever fathom.

After a moment, he whispered out, "What changed?" his voice surprisingly steady. Kyo could feel the change sweep over his lover and he visibly winced. He licked his lips and shifted, simply bringing his hand to rest against Die's chest, over his heart.

It took him a minute to speak after that and when he did, his voice was low and just the slightest bit shaky. "When my voice went out and I could feel myself... spiraling into the darkness within myself... there was always this one light that kept me from truly hitting bottom." He swallowed then took a deep breath before continuing. "You were there, holding my hand throughout it all, despite my best efforts to be miserable." 

He ducked his head a little further and let out a sigh. "Then, when... the thing… with Yakan... I just...," he raised his head finally though he didn't meet Die's eyes. "...I knew that I would do anything for you... for the rest of our lives..."

Die closed his eyes to seal away the depth of his emotion in that moment. He didn't know how to feel about it, to know that before that, Kyo hadn't really thought about them being together forever... and yet, he'd accepted the engagement. In some ways, it upset him greatly, and yet... in others... he'd always known Kyo wasn't one for typical love, had never conformed to the rules that other people did.

He ran his hand gently through Kyo's hair, soothing himself with the action as much as Kyo. After a few moments, when he thought he could control his voice, he responded quietly. "I don't want you doing anything - especially something so permanent - that you don't completely want. Marriage shouldn't be about me, it should be about _us_ , and the decision to stay with one another for the rest of our lives. If you have _any_ misgivings about this, then... we'll wait."

Kyo listened to Die's response and felt a bubble of frustration well up in him. He could hardly hear Die's words over the rush of emotions swirling in his head and he clenched his jaw against them, forcing himself to be calm. 

He finally shifted back to look at Die's face, taking him by the shirt and shaking him a little. "Damn it, Daisuke! That's not what I'm saying! At all! What I'm saying is that I was content to just be with you, as we were. _Now_ , however, I want that to be more than just emotionally together. I want it to be... legal!" The look in his eyes pleaded with Die to understand what he was saying, pleaded for him to see what he'd meant.

Die gasped when Kyo grabbed him and shook slightly. He tilted his head up to look Kyo in the eyes, confusion written across his face as he gazed at the other. The use of his legal name held him to the words, forcing him to take them at face value, knowing how rarely Kyo used it and the instances in which he did.

He swallowed thickly, studying the other and then sighing softly, tugging Kyo into his embrace fully, pushing his nose against Kyo's neck. "I'm sorry," he offered softly, "I just... I want..." he could feel the tears welling up and he couldn't seem to stop them, so he clamped his mouth shut to keep from showing them to Kyo in that manner.

Kyo just shook his head, pressing his lips together to hide their trembling. He spared a brief thought for the fact that before Die, he'd never been a man to cry. He wrapped his arms around his love, embracing him tightly, stroking his fingers through red hair. "Koi...," he murmured softly, pressing a kiss to Die's temple.

The moment that Kyo voiced the affectionate sentiment, Die hugged him tighter, letting out a soft sound and then breathing out his reply, "I love you more than I fucking love anything, Tooru... I can't imagine how my life would have ended up without you in it and sometimes... I guess... I get carried away in my own mind, thinking things I shouldn't."

The vocalist could only hold Die tighter, hearing his true name on those lips causing him to spill a few tears, the drops gathering in Die's hair. He let out a soft, shaky laugh, shaking his head. "I love you just the same..." He squeezed 

Die then very lightly smacked him. "You should stop thinking..."

Die let out a soft laugh and then tugged on Kyo's hair lightly. "Only one thing ever makes me stop thinking, trust me on this." He sighed, sliding his hand down to rub at Kyo's back lightly. "So... we're okay then?"

Kyo let out a chuckle then leaned back so he could look into his lover's eyes properly. "We're perfectly imperfect," he quipped with a smile.  
Snorting, Die nodded and then sighed, flopping his head back again, wanting to say something, but having no idea what.

Kyo solved Die's conundrum by shifting forward and covering his mouth with his own, claiming it thoroughly.

Die let out a surprised little sound as Kyo began to kiss him. He closed his eyes and went with it though, simply kissing his lover back in a languid sort of manner.

Kyo settled against Die, content to focus on the press and pull of their lips together, his hand sliding through his lover's hair. Somehow, he felt exhausted now, as if the emotion of the moment before had wiped him out, leaving him a little raw feeling and in need of comfort.

As the kiss continued, Die pushed his hands into Kyo's hair, angling them so he could kiss Kyo in a much deeper manner. He groaned softly into the kiss, his fingers lightly tugging on his lover's hair.

Kyo pushed out a breath through his nose, eventually parting his lips, shifting against Die, his hand stroking over his chest, a soft sound escaping him.  
It took Die only a few minutes before he was ramping back up again, his cheeks flushing slightly and his cock threatening to respond to the situation. He huffed out a soft breath and then pulled back entirely from kissing Kyo, just stroking his hair lightly. Some part of him desperately wanted the other, needed to have that solid proof of his lover in his arms. But the other half was desperate to prove this wasn't about sex and that he'd be just fine without it, feeling slightly thrown off by their previous conversations.

Kyo could read Die like a book and when the other pulled away, his eyes held a slight twinkle. He leaned in and pecked Die's lips again before stroking his hand over his face. "Die, part of being bonded with someone is the joy of finding glorious physical pleasure in each other's bodies." He licked his lips then continued, "After all, what better way to claim me than by doing so physically?"

Die could feel the pang of brief panic slip through him the moment Kyo spoke up. He wet his lips a little and then sniffed, shifting and then sighing as he tilted his head back, his hand lightly tugging at Kyo's hair. "I know... I just... you know I don't _have_ to turn everything to sex, right?"

Kyo considered removing himself from Die's lap for a moment but then decided against it, not wanting his lover to think him annoyed. "I know, baby. I _know_...otherwise, we wouldn't be here... with a house, a wedding... two kittens..."

Die stroked his hands down Kyo's neck, shoulders, and then his sides, nodding a little. "Just as long as you know... I'm just... really sexually active and I can't seem to turn it off at this point in my life." He huffed out a laugh. "I don't know if I ever will be able to, but I guess at least you know what you're getting into, yeah?"  
Kyo chuckled and slid his hand over Die's shoulder. "You haven't seen me complaining yet, have you?" He reached up to tug a strand of Die's hair. "I'll never have to worry about _not_ getting any."

"I guess that's a one-up on a lot of relationships, hmm?" He reached to slide his hand back up into Kyo's hair, unable to leave it alone since the other had cut it. It was becoming more of a nervous tick than fiddling with his own hair.  
Kyo snorted lightly and leaned into Die's touch, getting used to the feel of the other's fingers in his hair. "Indeed. Though, you know, if tomorrow you came to me and told me that you couldn't anymore, I'd be fine with that, too."

Die pulled him closer and pressed his lips to the corner of Kyo's mouth. "You know what I've had the strangest craving for lately?"

Kyo shifted and leaned into Die, resting his hand on the back of his neck. "Mm, what's that?"

"Pancakes," Die murmured, chuckling after a moment and shrugging. "No idea why. Just pancakes with maple syrup."

Kyo pulled back and blinked at his lover, having not been expecting that answer in the least. "Pan...cakes?" He laughed, scooting off Die's lap then standing up, holding out his hand. "Let's go get pancakes then!"

Die blinked at Kyo for a moment and then laughed softly, reaching and taking his hand. "Actually... let's make them. We haven't cooked in a while."

Kyo pulled Die up with surprising ease then pulled him close for a tight hug before nodding. "Okay, but I don't promise mine won't turn out to be burned bricks..."

"Pssh, you mix, I'll make." He moved into the kitchen and began pulling out all the items they'd need, feeling proud that he still had some Bisquick he could use easily. Leaning against the counter, he winced slightly, his erection pushing against the counter. Why was he so foolish as to ignore this anyway? 

He supposed, though, that it was worth the point he was making.  
Kyo chuckled, following along behind Die and reached to get a mixing bowl and spoon. He caught Die's wince and glanced down, seeing the reason and just shaking his head. He knew his lover was trying to prove something but he couldn't imagine trying to do anything when his cock was that hard.  
Die began setting out ingredients, telling Kyo what the English instructions on the box told him to do with them, finding a griddle to put on the stove. He flicked his gaze over to Kyo and smiled a bit at him.

Kyo squinted at the box for a moment then went about measuring out what he needed before beginning to mix it all together, leaning his hip against the counter as he did. He glanced up and caught his lover's eyes, smiling. "How did you even find this stuff? It's not like we made pancakes in the hotels..."

Die beamed at him and then intoned, "Wal-Mart! That place was full of all kinds of fun things." He went about cracking the eggs into the mixture and tossing the shells away, washing his hands. "Also, the breakfast Boss took me to when we were both in LA."

Kyo chuckled as he made sure everything was well mixed before handing the bowl to Die. "I should have known..." He pushed himself up onto the counter, swinging his legs, cocking his head as he thought for a moment. "I should have gone in to one at some point..."

"Next time, I'll drag you. It's golden! Nothing like the ones here. Completely different stuff!" He pulled out a spatula and cooking spray, spraying the griddle and then pouring some of the batter onto it, waiting for a few moments and then flipping it over to the other side.

Kyo sniffed and nodded. "Maybe..." He watched Die making the pancakes, his stomach giving a little rumble as the sweet smell of them cooking reached him. "Looks perfect, baby."

"In the pantry, there's a bottle of syrup. The bottle shaped like a woman." He carefully retrieved a plate and put the first one onto it, starting to repeat the process with a second one.

The vocalist hummed and hopped off the counter, going to retrieve the syrup then reaching into the fridge to get the milk. He took both bottles to the table then went back to get a glass, turning to Die. "Want milk or something else?"

"Milk please. That's appropriate to go with this." He gestured slightly. "If you want to get the eggs and make two, we can have some protein with this."

Kyo considered it for a moment then stood, going to grab the eggs and a little bowl. "Sounds good to me." He cracked three into the bowl, added a little water, salt and pepper before whisking them up with a fork then pouring them on the still hot griddle. He waited a moment then carefully folded the eggs, forming a roll. After making sure they were set, he used the spatula to cut the roll evenly in half, putting one on each plate next to the pancakes. "There..."

Die watched Kyo with some amusement, finishing up the extra batter in tiny malformed pancakes and then tossing them onto their plates. "I learned the small ones are better anyway," he murmured, turning off the oven and turning around, narrowly avoiding stepping on a cat before meandering off to get forks.

Kyo chuckled. "Yeah, they can be." He snuck a bite of one to both kittens who were very interested in what they were doing now then moved to the table, grabbing glasses for milk on the way. Once he settled down, he poured them each some milk then added syrup to his pancakes before waiting on Die to join him.

Die joined him after a moment, settling down and passing over a fork, popping open the syrup and pouring some over his entire plate with a smirk. "Trust me on the eggs bit unless you can't stand the sweet."

Kyo snorted lightly, shaking his head. "I don't want the syrup on my eggs but I don't mind bacon or sausage getting it on there." He grinned then speared a small pancake with his fork, bringing it to his mouth and taking a large bite. "Mm!"

Die watched his lover take a bite and then, looking triumphant, he stuffed a bite into his own mouth, chewed, and swallowed. "Perfection!"

Kyo gave Die a syrupy grin then dug into his food, not realizing that he'd been hungry until just now.

Die sat there, eating his pancakes and eggs for a few minutes, shifting every once in a while in his seat until he finally put down his fork and groaned slightly, scooting back and putting his head on the edge of the table with a soft laugh. "Next time I think I can prove some kind of fucked up point by ignoring my dick, tell me I'm an idiot?"

Kyo had finished most of his food when Die laid his head down. At first, he thought maybe his lover had a stomach ache but then he spoke and Kyo found himself laughing. He took a swig of milk then reached over, squeezing Die's thigh. "You're an idiot."

"Thanks," Die offered with a soft groan, eventually sitting up and quickly eating the rest of his meal, washing it down with his milk and then sitting back in the chair, his dick finally starting to slacken. "Took long e-fucking-nough," he murmured.

Kyo chuckled and finished up his own meal then drained the rest of his milk before patting Die's leg. "Mhm, though I have to say, I wouldn't have been objective to a little... dessert."

At that, Die groaned, tilting his head back. "Damn it, Kyo! You _know_ you have full control over my cock!"

Kyo smirked then stood up, gathering up their dishes to put in the sink. "A power I enjoy greatly..."

Die ran his hand through his hair and then sighed, pushing himself up and stuffing his hands into his pockets. "Yes, well... just as long as you don't super-boner me in public somehow."

The shorter man turned around and grinned at his lover, shaking his head. "Mm... I'd love to watch you squirm." He moved over to Die and reached out, pulling him close by his hips and leaning up and steal a kiss.

Die let out a soft whine into Kyo's mouth, backing him up toward the wall and pushing his lover against the flat surface, reaching to get one of his legs hitched up over his thigh.

Kyo inhaled sharply through his nose as he was pressed into the wall, a soft moan sliding past his lips as Die hitched his leg up. He slid his hands over his lover's chest then up through his hair, tugging the strands slightly.

Die pulled back from the kiss just long enough to gasp out, "God I was trying so hard to prove I didn't require sex, but damn it all to hell, you make me so fucking horny," before he pressed his lips against the other once again, hips grinding hard.

Kyo simply let out a breathless laugh then groaned, pushing back against Die's hips, his cock quickly hardening within the confines of his pants. He nipped and tugged at Die's bottom lip then soothed the area with his tongue before pushing it into Die's mouth.

Die let out a keening whine, shuddering and bucking his hips a little bit, pursing his lips and then reaching down to grab at Kyo's ass, humping harder against him.

Kyo groaned and shifted, grabbing Die's shoulders and moving against him. He let his head drop back against the wall for a moment, pants of breath escaping him.

Die sighed softly, his hips pushing against Kyo's over and over, unable to even remotely stop. He whimpered as ground against him harshly. "Goddamn it, I want you so fucking bad!"

Kyo's nails dug into Die's skin as he pushed his hips back against him, moaning lowly. "Fuck, Die..." He let his lover grind against him for a bit longer then looked up at him. "Fuck me on the table. Now."

It didn't even take a second before Die had Kyo onto the table, pushing him onto the table and wrenching his pants off. In another second, he had his own undone and his cock free, spit on his fingers as he ran his hand over his cock.  
Kyo groaned at Die quick actions, his body giving a shudder as it was pressed into the table. He shifted and spread his legs, showing Die just how eager he was.

"Fuck, Kyo," he hissed out, shifting forward and pressing his cock against his tight hole. "Do you want this or do we need something else first?" he breathed out.

Kyo shook his head, hands moving to grip the edge of the table. "I can take it... just hurry up!"  
Gritting his teeth, Die plunged into Kyo's body, a low growl ripping free of his throat as he sank into the other's waiting body. "Oh fuck!" Immediately he began to thrust, desperate for the feeling of it.

Kyo let out a cry as Die thrust into him, the pleasure pain making his eyes water slightly. He pushed against Die, wanting more and more. "Fuck, yes!"  
Die shifted up onto his toes, grabbing the table with one hand, Kyo's thigh with the other as he thrust as hard as he could possibly manage, moaning loudly as he picked it up even more.

Kyo shifted, reaching up to grasp Die's bicep with one hand and his cock with the other, jerking himself off hard and fast as his body clenched around Die.  
"Shit, baby," Die gasped out, his head down as he fucked him, watching where his cock was going with rapt anticipation. "Can't last long right now." He let out a whimper, shivering slightly a moment later.

Kyo grunted in response, his hand a blur over his own cock as pleasure began to overwhelm him. He drug his nails down Die's chest then brought it to his own, tweaking his nipple harshly. That was all it took for him lose it and he was cumming, spilling his offering onto his stomach and chest as his body arched up, a cry ripping from his lips. "Die!"

Die took that moment as a signal for his own body, pushing in one last time and grunting as he lost it, a bit dazed with how quickly he'd cum tonight. But the truth of the matter was... he didn't give a shit. They could have quick fucks, too, if they damn well wanted. With that in mind, he smirked as he pulled out and leaned his weight on the chair next to him.

Kyo let out a groan as Die came within him, his body offering him one last spurt of orgasm before he slumped back against the table fully, his breath coming in pants. He looked up at his lover, noting the smirk on his face and raising an eyebrow. "What? Have I got syrup on me or something?"

"Nope," Die let out a little laugh. "Just how fucking fast we were because I tried to wait and not do it tonight."

Kyo snorted and pulled Die down to kiss him deeply. "Mm, well, no more waiting, okay? Or should I make you wait until our wedding?" He grinned evilly, knowing that neither of them would be able to abstain that long.  
"Dear god, I'd explode," Die returned, chuckling softly as he nipped lightly at Kyo's lower lip.

Kyo chuckled then stroked his fingers through Die's hair, grinning a little. "Gods I love you."

Kyo grinned then sat up, groaning a little as he hopped off the table. "C'mon, let's shower then you can show me more of your wedding ideas." He grabbed Die's hand, pulling his lover towards their bathroom, a nervous excitement building up in his stomach at the idea of truly planning their wedding. It was something he never thought he'd get to do.

Die followed Kyo off toward the shower, a goofy look on his face. "Mmm... sounds good to me."


	41. Chapter 41

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna straight up be honest. I can't find time to edit this and my editors have lives of their own that need attending to. So this is completely unedited, as will all future chapters, until I start putting the "beta readers" tag back in on here. Sorry to do this, but I want it at least posted (and off my desktop) after it's been done for... what... years now? Yeah. Urgh.
> 
> In any case, if anyone sees anything glaring they'd like to point out, go for it and I'll fix it. Basically all i did was remove any personal comments we made, check spelling (only underlined incorrect things, not full-read-through) and formatting, and then tossed it up here. I hope it's still worth something like this.

For Die, the day started off like any other day. The 13th of May. Not particularly anything much to him... another concert, another typical day in the life of the guitarist of Dir en grey. He got up, showered, put on his clothing for the day, and then headed to the venue. Lunch, setup, sound check, dinner, and then the waiting. When they entered the sage, Die found himself perhaps more energized than he had been for a good long while. He bounced around his side of the stage, completely and utterly in his own zone.

He felt somehow elated and completely enthused with the show. With his monitors in his ears, he never once took his gaze off of what was happening in front of him, even when he shifted sides of the stage to Kaoru and Toshiya's side, he still never lost focus on the crowd. And by the time he left the stage for the night, he was in a damn good mood, his eyes alight with the fire of a damn good show, and a bounce to his step that had been lacking for several months.

Moving to plop down backstage, he took the offered pop-top Asahi and cracked it open, taking a healthy swig of the first beer he'd had in nearly three weeks, his gaze floating around the room, finally spotting Kyo standing in front of the mirrors, his hands braced on the table. He looked exhausted, but that wasn't exactly unusual for Kyo post-show.

In complete opposite to Die's cheerful day, Kyo's was not going at all like he'd hoped. Over the past couple of days, the telltale signs of an infection of some sort had settled over his body, making his throat ache and eventually a fever set in. He'd stubbornly refused to admit to being ill, even to himself and had been combating the symptoms with pain killers and tea. 

The evening of the show, he danced his way out of a sound check on the pretense of just a headache and spent the time lying on the couch backstage, praying that he could make it through the show without making it obvious that he was not in the best of health. 

It came time to do the show and after swallowing down more pain killers with alcohol laced tea, he went out and pushed himself to the brink, ignoring the fatigue and pain that washed over him. 

Kyo wasn't sure how he made it to the end of the show but eventually he found himself standing in front of the mirrors, leaning heavily on the counter, his forearms shaking. 

He knew he had to get sat down or else he'd fall and falling in front of Die or the rest of the band would ensure that his condition would be revealed. With a sigh, he turned to make his way to a chair but never made it. The moment he pushed away from the counter, the world tilted sharply and soon he found himself on the ground, a faint gasp leaving his lips.

The instant Kyo pushed away from the counter, Die knew something was horribly wrong. His own shocked cry echoed around the room as he watched Kyo start to collapse right in front of him. His heart clenched in his chest and the beer fell to the floor, contents spilling all over as he actually launched himself as Kyo in a hopeless attempt to catch him before he hit the ground.

But Die just didn't have enough superhuman strength to get there first and he ended up there a second after Kyo fell. Sliding to his knees, he grasped the vocalist, pulling him into his lap and staring helplessly at him for a few seconds. "Kyo... baby... can you hear me?" he gasped out, pure concern washing over his face in that moment.

It was only a second or two that Kyo blinked out but when he woke up again, Die was there holding him. He let out a grunt and struggled to sit up, looking more pissed than anything. He opened his mouth to speak, a rough whisper coming out instead. "I can hear you."

Die pressed his palm to the side of Kyo's face and then gasped, pulling it back. It burned like fire. With a frown, he touched his forehead. "Oh fuck. You're burning up." He smoothed Kyo's now-short-blonde hair back, wiping his sweaty palm on his pants before he pulled his phone from his pocket. "I should call an ambulance."

Kyo closed his eyes, taking a moment to lean against Die even as the other fussed over his apparent fever. At the mention of an ambulance, however, he sat upright and snatched the phone from Die's hand. "No, absolutely not...I'm...I'll be fine."

Die stared at Kyo in absolute alarm. He grasped his phone and pulled it from his lover's fingers, it slipping through all too easily, showing how weak Kyo actually was right in that moment. He swallowed thickly. "Then we have the tour van take us to the hospital. You're going and that's final. I will not take no for an answer with a fever like that." He stood up and gently helped Kyo from the floor to the couch where he gave him a bottle of water and then rummaged around until he came up with two aspirin to try to reduce the fever. "Take this."

Kyo sighed and let Die help him up, not that he had any choice in the matter. He took the water with a faintly trembling hand and downed the aspirin plus half the water before sighing and looking at Die, his eyelids barely open. "Don't make a lot fuss, ok?"

Die stared at him for a long moment and then shook his head, just sighing and turning to leave the room. Once he found Nora, he quickly told her he needed to have the van for Kyo and himself and that he'd drive it if need be, but they'd have to get another van for the others because Kyo was sick. He indicated they were going to the hospital, but didn't tell her what was wrong or why and declined to answer any other follow-up question, simply waiting on the keys.

Once he had them, he went to get the van, pulling it up with the passenger side of the doors right next to the exit. Slipping back in, he went to Kyo and held out his arm. "We're going."

Kyo remained on the couch in a dazed state, ignoring the others as they moved around him, going about cleaning up, changing and showering. They were used to his after show moods so they paid him no mind at the moment and for that he was thankful. 

After a few minutes, Die showed up again and he looked up at his lover and sighed. He could see the determination in his eyes and he resigned himself to visiting the hospital, despite the fact that he'd just about rather swallow boric acid. He stood, wobbled for a moment then grasped Die's arm, letting the other lead him towards the exit. "

Die led Kyo out of the venue and into the passenger seat of the van with no interruption. He went around to the driver's side and got in, starting the engine, and then pulling out.

After a few minutes, they were on their way, away from the venue and halfway to the hospital, Die perhaps pushing the speed more than he should have been, his lips set in a thin line, and his entire demeanor simply radiating his need to get Kyo through this.

Kyo settled into the seat, nursing his water bottle then leaning back, the ride and post-show exhaustion making him woozy. He closed his eyes and let himself drift in and out of consciousness, trying to ignore the fact that his head was trying to explode.

Die arrived at the hospital in record time and all but burst out of the van and into the ER, breathlessly asking the nurse for a wheelchair and that he'd brought the patient to the ER because he was burning up and needed to be seen immediately. When they asked who, he leaned over the counter, and informed the nurse that it was Kyo from Dir en grey and that he'd just collapsed post-show, all but snarling at her that this needed to go fast and quiet. She immediately got the point and an orderly was rushing out the doors with a wheelchair within moments, Die hot on his heels.

When Kyo opened his eyes again, it was to the view of the ER entrance of whatever hospital Die had taken him to and an orderly with a wheelchair being chased by his lover. He gave a weak groan and let himself be put in the chair and taken inside. 

Once they were in, he was taken to a room and assisted onto a bed, blood pressure, temperature and other vitals being taken. He overheard one of the nurses murmur, "40 degrees," then cluck her tongue as she inserted an IV into his hand. He winced slightly at the severity of his fever, having not realized it was quite that high. "No wonder I feel like shit," he muttered aloud, leaning back against the scratchy hospital bed. He was already ready to get out of there.

Die went to park the van and then tore back into the hospital, rushing through the hallways and skidding into the room. By the time he got there, he had a stitch in his side that he was clutching at and he was gasping air, his eyes wide and his pulse frantic. Sliding up to Kyo's bed, he stood there next to him, watching the going's on and reading the chart, his gasp loud. "Oh my god! Forty degrees Celsius?!"

Kyo opened his eyes when he heard Die enter the room again, he pinched look on his face. "Hn..." He turned his attention to another nurse that had arrived at his bedside. She affixed an oxygen sensor to his finger then applied a gel pack to his forehead before bustling off. "Sit down, Die," he uttered quietly, frowning at his lover.

Die stood there, looking nothing if not distraught. He had gone from happy to utterly upset. Pursing his lips, he shook his head a little bit and then flopped down in a chair. He closed his eyes and let out a soft whine, pressing his hand to his forehead.

Kyo shifted a bit in the bed, looking at Die then sighing. What he really wanted to do right then was get away from the tubes in his hand, the disgusting smell of antisceptic and constant beeping and whirring of the hospital machinery and just go home. 

He let out a huff and squeezed his eyes shut, moving his hand to scratch his nose a bit.

Die peered at the other and then reached to take his hand that didn't have tubes in it. He licked his lips a little bit and then just sat there, holding his hand, hoping it came across as worried bandmate and not lover to the nurses and doctors rushing around.

Kyo took Die hand gratefully, holding onto it tightly. It was a short while longer until the doctor showed up and went about examining him, doing the usual checks of listening to his lungs and heart then peering into his eyes, ears, nose and finally his throat. It was here that caused the doctor to raise an eyebrow and look at Kyo. "How long has your throat been bothering you?" 

Kyo glanced at Die then back to the doctor, sighing. "A couple of days..." The physician hummed and pulled out a swab, taking a throat culture then feeling around Kyo's glands and such. "I'm going to go run some tests but honestly, it looks like tonsillitis...and a pretty severe case, judging by your fever." He gave Kyo a look as if to say it was Kyo's fault for getting sick in the first place then turned and headed for the door. "I'll be back with the result."

Die didn't say a word while the doctor was in. He just let a nurse know he'd given Kyo two aspirin to try to help the fever. The nurse seemed okay with it and then wrote it down, wandering off as well, leaving the room devoid of staff while fluids seeped into Kyo's body via IV.

Kyo stared after the doctor then looked at Die. "Tonsillitis? Is he fucking serious? How can I have tonsillitis?" Kyo groaned and flopped back on the bed, tugging the cool gel pack over his eyes. "Can we leave now?," he mumbled, sounding for all the world like a petulant child.

Die stared at him for a long few moments and then looked down at their linked hands. "Any number of things can cause it," he murmured, remembering asking the doctor once when he'd had it. "Flu, staph, strep, colds... a lot of other shit. It's not so unusual for people to get it, especially after the surgery you had." He was very quiet, his head bowed. It was if Heaven and Earth had moved to give him one of his worst fears that he'd never voiced aloud to Kyo.

Kyo sighed, fidgeting with the IV cord. "Lovely." He leaned back against the bed and closed his eyes again, feeling more drained than he'd like to admit. "Can you go see if I get some water or ice or something?"

Die instantly stood up, released Kyo's hand, and moved numbly from the room. He wandered the halls for a good five minutes before a passing nurse realized he looked like he was in shock and asked him what he needed. She gave him a bucket of ice chips and he came back into the room, sitting down with it and pulling on the glove so he wouldn't give Kyo anything else, and then offering him a chip of ice wordlessly.

After Die left the room, Kyo laid there silently cursing the gods for his predicament. It had been at least an hour since they'd gotten there and he was ready to get his prescription antibiotics/pain pills/whatever else and leave. He had a sad feeling that wasn't going to happen any time soon though. 

When Die came back and offered him some of the ice with a gloved hand, he grunted in thanks and took it, sucking it with a sigh of relief.

Die fed Kyo chip after chip of ice until he couldn't take the cold any longer on his fingers. Setting the bucket down, he just flopped back in the chair, realizing that he smelled like sweat and then realizing that it was actually Kyo's sweat and that made him even grumpier.

He sighed and closed his eyes. Questions swirled inside of him; he wanted to know what was going on with the whole thing, why Kyo hadn't told him he was sick, why he hadn't realized... but he wasn't asking at all.

When Die sat back but didn't speak, Kyo just closed his eyes and found himself dozing off again. 

It was another little while before the doctor returned, clipboard in hand. "We have concluded that it is in fact tonsillitis. Normally, we would prescribe antibiotics and rest but given your..unique situation...I'm recommending that you stay a day or so, especially since your fever is still rather high though it has decreased some." 

Kyo stared at the doctor for a moment then sat up, shaking his head. "That's impossible. We have shows to do..."

Die sat up, his gaze sliding between Kyo and the doctor, looking rather peeved when Kyo said he couldn't cancel the shows. But he knew his lover would only just argue with him, so he just pursed his lips a little bit and sighed, looking away if only because he couldn't stand to look at the scene unfolding before him.

The doctor gave Kyo a look of displeasure then sighed. "I highly recommend that you stay but..I can't make you. However, would you at least consider coming back in for more IVs each day until the show?" 

Kyo frowned and glanced at Die before looking back at the doctor. He sighed and nodded, knowing that Die wouldn't let him skip out it in the least."Yes, as long as I don't have to stay here overnight." 

The doctor nodded then looked at Kyo's IV bag which was nearly empty. "When that is finished, a nurse will come and get you ready for discharge." With that, he nodded to them both and walked out.

Some part of Die was happy that Kyo at least relented to the IVs each day. He sighed and then licked his lips a little bit. "Mmm... yes, I'll make sure he comes back in each evening." He crossed his arms and looked away, not caring how much he gave away right then.

Kyo gave a quiet cough then shifted around, sitting up and pushing the blanket off of himself. He stared at the IV, silently willing it to hurry up to empty. 

When it finally did, the machine beeped and shortly after a nurse came in to unhook him from it and bandage his hand. She took his temperature again and announced that it had decreased to 38c. She handed Kyo his discharge papers and informed him to return immediately should his fever begin to rise or if anything changed then bid them goodnight. 

Kyo sighed with some relief that his fever had decreased and he stood up, papers in hand, a little more steady on his feet. "Let's go."

Die stood up and poured more of the ice chips into a plastic cup and handed it over to Kyo. He took the papers and folded them, pushing them into his pocket, and then going ot the door, opening it and waiting on Kyo, still silent.

Kyo took the cup and made his way out into the hall, walking slowly towards the exit. Once they were outside, he glanced at Die then at a bench nearby, frowning a little. "Can you...get the van?" He wasn't feeling up to walking to the parking garage.

Die made sure Kyo sat down on the bench and then went about moving to get the van, walking off quickly. Once he got to the van, he slid inside and then collapsed over the steering wheel, shaking slightly, as he let himself just breathe for a few minutes. This was entirely fucked.

After a minute, he straightened up, put on his seat belt, and then maneuvered the car from the garage and up to the bench Kyo was waiting at.

When Die pulled up, Kyo climbed into the passenger seat and buckled himself in, leaning his head back with a sigh. "I need a fucking shower. I reek like sweat _and_ hospital funk."

Die stared at him and then sighed, pulling out. "Yeah... we both need our showers, trust me." He headed toward their home, intent on keeping the van for the night and then returning it in the morning... or he'd have someone come get it.

Kyo hummed the promptly fell asleep on the ride home, his body slumping in the seat. 

He awoke when the van stopped again and he looked out, a look of relief on his face as he saw that they were home. "Mm, finally..." He carefully climbed from the van though he stumbled a bit before he could head for the door. "Ugh, you may have to come hold me up in the shower."

Die wandered off toward the door, almost absently. Unlocking it, he turned off the alarm system and then stepped inside. "I have no problem with that... though, I think honestly a bath might do you better."

Kyo sniffed and nodded in a agreement, silently and carefully making his way upstairs. He unceremoniously stripped himself down and sat on the edge of the tub, leaning in to stopper it and start filling it, adding some lavender and mint oil to it. 

Finally, for the first time that night really, he looked up at Die's face and cocked his head. "Baby...are you okay?"

Die found his way to the kitchen, found the one lonely beer in the fridge, popped it open, and then downed it in under a minute, crushing the can and tossing it in the bin. He tilted his head and then belched before he made his way upstairs and into the bedroom. He swallowed a little and moved to the bathroom.

Stepping inside, he removed his own clothing and then glanced at Kyo when he spoke. "I just slammed a beer in one go. No breath. You tell me."

Kyo's jaw tightened and he had the good sense to look somewhat ashamed for a few moments before turning and slipping into the bath, his eyes cast on the water. "....I'm sorry." He didn't know what else to say, really. They'd had this discussion before about how he'd pushed himself too far and he just really didn't want to argue about it.

Die sighed, reaching to actually turn off the hot water tap and force the bath to fill with cold water. He pursed his lips again, realizing that honestly, he was pissed off. "You didn't fucking tell me."

Kyo glowered a little at the cold water, shivering as it ran over his heated flesh. He gathered some in his hands and let it drip over his face. "I know. I didn't want you to worry, Die. Because...all you ever seem to do is worry about me." He looked up then immediately glanced away, guilt crossing his features. He knew Die had reasons to worry, knew that they were his fault.

"We have an honesty policy, Kyo... and you need to keep up your end of the bargain. When you're not doing okay, I want to know about it. Before it gets this bad. I promised you I'd tell you things about my issues... you tell me about yours." He sighed and then settled in the tub as well with a wince. Picking up a washcloth, he began filling it and then wringing it out over Kyo's body.

Kyo hung his head, drawing his knees to his chest, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. He shuddered as Die began letting the cold water run over his body, chill bumps popping out everywhere. "I..I know...I just..." He waved his hand, unsure of what to say in his defense. Finally, he just reached out and caught Die's hand, squeezing it then bringing it to his lips. "I'm sorry."

"You'd best be," Die returned. "And now you'd best stop talking." He sighed and went about actually washing Kyo, turning off the faucets.

Kyo looked at Die then nodded, moving around to let him wash him, already feeling better just getting the grunge off of his body. As he was bathed, he thought with no small amount of distaste that he was going to have to become friends with a whiteboard again.

Die finished up with washing Kyo off and then quickly went about washing himself off as well. He crawled out of the tub and then grabbed a towel, wrapping it around his waist before moving to get one for Kyo. "Can you get out?"

Kyo made sure he was rinsed then stood, carefully stepping out of the tub with a determined look before nodding at Die. He took the towel and dried off, his actions slow and a bit unsteady.

Very carefully Die moved the other toward the bedroom once he had the towel around him fully. He moved him to the bed and then slid him down on the bed. "Are you aroused at all from the show?" he asked quietly, knowing it seemed out of the ordinary.

Kyo curled up in a bed as soon as he was there, his body feeling like it would meld to the mattress. Die's question had him cracking an eye open to peer at him curiously before shrugging. He was rather weak and knew doing anything physical would be a bad idea. Instead of answering, he simply point to Die and raised his eyebrows curiously.

Die studied the other and then patted his thigh. "I just wanted to know if you needed anything, that's all." He stood up and then sighed softly. "Go ahead and sleep, love. I'll be just a few minutes. Need to let Nora and the others know what's going on at least a little."

Kyo nodded a little then flopped on his back, closing his eyes, listening to Die's footsteps fade away. He laid there feeling guilty for a few moments before exhaustion took over and he slipped into a fitful sleep.

Die went downstairs and picked up their landline, calling Nora and quickly filling her in, asking her to relay to the others what was going on. Once he hung up, he sighed, running his hand through his hair. Honestly, he was just happy she'd decided to come for a little while to be with them for a few interviews they had been doing in English. With a sigh, he grabbed a bottle of water from the water bottle on his desk. 

Traipsing back upstairs, he flopped onto the bed, and turned to peer at Kyo's sleeping form.

Kyo kind of jerked awake when Die flopped on the bed and turned to look at him, reaching out to catch a strand of his hair, pulling it lightly.

Die grimaced lightly when Kyo woke up. He sighed and caught Kyo's hand, kissing it gently. "Sleep, love." He pressed a kiss to his hand and then lt it go, rolling over and facing the wall, closing his eyes and trying desperately to fall asleep.

Kyo smiled a little then settled back down, finally falling deeper asleep, a soft snore issuing from him.

Die waited until Kyo was honestly passed out again before he shifted ever so slightly, pushing his towel free, and reaching to grasp his half-hard cock. Closing his eyes, he felt the wave of shame wash over him as he began to jerk off. The truth was, he couldn't help it. He desperately needed what he was doing, in so many ways, but he also felt like he should be ashamed of it. There was no joy in the action, simply the physical need for release, and the desperation of his mental faculties.

It didn't take him long before he came with a little whimper, spilling onto the towel beside him. With a shudder, he milked himself out, and then flicked the last drop off with his forefinger. He pushed up a little and pulled the towel out from under himself, tossing it to the floor and then pulling the covers up around himself, feeling truly exhausted as he shut his eyes, finally relaxed enough to drift off, no matter how worried he was.


	42. Chapter 42

There had been a lot going on since Kyo had been taken to the hospital on the thirteenth, but Die had managed to get himself collected in the meantime. Kyo had stopped talking and they'd done their level best to keep the promises of taking him in each night for his IVs and temperature checks.

Finally, the sixteenth rolled around and the show arrived. Die entered the evening with trepidation. Something in the air just felt _off_ , like something was horribly wrong and nothing in the world could fix it. But he kept his mouth shut, knowing well that Kyo would argue until he was blue in the face and then go on anyway, no matter what Die did or said. Because if there was one thing his lover was, it was stubborn as fucking hell.

Several old friends called just before the show, letting Die know that they'd be at the after party waiting for him. It was with a heavy heart that Die agreed to meet them there and slowly realized that the only one of them that knew he and Kyo were together was Boss. He turned his phone off and pushed it into his pocket, quietly collecting himself as best he could, squeezing Kyo's shoulder on the way past, and then slipped out on stage, doing his level best to give the audience a smile.

Kyo, honestly, felt worse with each passing day. The IVs and extra fluids had done little to improve his condition. However, he was determined to not disappoint the fans and gotten two IVs right before the show as well taken heavy duty pain killers. Now the intro music was playing and it was time to go on, but Kyo found that he could barely stand. He pushed himself up anyway though and made his way to the stage, thankful the light was dim. 

Halfway through their set, he lost it and ended up leaning over his crate, arms shaking as nausea rolled over him. He started an impromtu Inward Scream to cover it up, keeping the tone of it low and even then his voice sounded like hell. 

Another few songs later, he found himself on his knees, frustrated as fuck at his own weakness. He screamed into the mic, making his throat raw. 

At their encore break, he downed a shot of whiskey and pushed himself through the rest of it before walking off stage and promptly collapsing before he could even get to the dressing room.

The entire show had Die on edge, feeling as though he were going to throw up at any second. He wasn't his normal bouncy self and he sure as shit didn't smile like he usually did. For the most part, he simply played his part and tried to keep himself steady as a rock; if for nothing other than to keep the fans attention and hope that they weren't nearly as worried about what he was seeing out of the corner of his eye throughout the entire show.

Die stayed out longer, watching Kyo leave the stage, and then threw out some picks and his water bottle. He then made his way backstage to a huge fuss, staff members gathered around in a circle, and someone talking frantically on the phone to what sounded like emergency services.

Anxiety rolled in full-force and Die shoved one of the newer staff members aside without so much as asking to be excused. Kyo lay there on the floor, completely passed out and unresponsive to what the person on the phone was trying to do. He could hear the distant wail of sirens and he slid to his knees, uncaring in that moment how it looked to anyone else as he shifted to cradle Kyo's head in his lap. 

Bowing his head, he simply sat there, tears trailing down his cheeks as he stroked over Kyo's cheek, fear welling in his heart. How much higher had the vocalist's fever climbed? Was he worse off than he'd been before? He let out a broken sob and at long last, Kaoru appeared, dispersing staff with gruff barks of orders, getting the breathing room significantly larger around Kyo, Die, and the girl on the phone.

Die pressed one shaking hand to his lips as he heard the back doors of the venue slam open and the sound of hurried feet on the floor. As soon as the medical team arrived, Die moved back, giving them the space they needed, watching as they strapped Kyo onto the board and then carried him away. And in that instant, he realized that they'd never changed his or Kyo's medical contacts. He was being taken to the ER and he wasn't conscious... and there was no way in hell they'd let him in without him being on that list.

Shoving himself back against the wall, he buried his face in his hands and simply let it all out, full-blown sobbing into his hands.

Toshiya spent his time toying with the crowd after the show then finally made his way off stage, grin still plastered on his face as he skipped down the hall. The scene that greeted him when he turned the corner however wiped it right off his face and made his heart jump in his throat. There, their vocalist was laid out and being loaded on a stretcher, staff members and the rest of the band looking tense and worried. 

He frowned and then looked around for Die, knowing the other would be melting down at this point. He soon found him sobbing against the wall and his heart went out to him. He knew that Die wouldn't be allowed to go to the hospital with Kyo and that had to kill him. Sighing, he moved around and quietly came to Die, tugging him into the dressing room and getting him sat down. "Die, he'll be okay," he reassured, though he wasn't exactly positive about that himself.

Die stumbled to his feet at Toshiya's insistence, going after him, trying hard to even pay attention to where he was and what was going on. Once he was inside, he all but fell on the couch, his entire body trembling, his lips numb with fear as he shook his head. "He wasn't awake, Toshiya... he wasn't awake... he wasn't," he grabbed at Toshiya's sweaty shirt, "fucking," he shook a little and then let out a loud sob, "awake!"

The bassist sighed softly, reaching out pat Die's shoulder. "I... I know, buddy... I know...but they'll get him awake." He looked around a bit and finally moved, grabbing a towel and a cold beer from the table, handing both to Die, unsure of what else to do at that point.

Die stared at the other for a moment, finally releasing him and grabbing the beer. He almost savagely smacked the lid off on the side of the table, and then slammed back half of it in one go. When he came up for air, he took the towel and mopped his face up, cursing and then launching the towel across the room. "Fuck!"

Toshiya sat down beside Die and sighed, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "Deep breath, Die...He's done this before and has come out fine."

Die closed his eyes and slid one hand over his face before doing as he was instructed, pulling in a deep breath of air and then slowly breathing it back out. He wet his lips and then sighed softly, shaking his head a little bit. "There's this stupid after party... and people are expecting me. Miyavi... Boss.. Motokatsu." He groaned and leaned forward. "Only Boss knows about Kyo and I, the others wouldn't understand why I'm so upset."

Toshiya looked at Die with sympathy then licked his lips. "Are you sure you want to go? You could just feign tiredness...though it has been a while, hm?" He frowned thoughtfully, reaching over for a beer for himself, popping the top off and taking a sip.

Die pushed one shaking hand through his hair. "I have to go," he murmured quietly. "And we forgot to change all of our medical shit, so they won't let me in unless he's awake and asks for me anyway."  
Toshiya nodded, reaching over to pat Die's knee. "Want me to come with? I brought my car tonight."

Die nodded a little. "Yeah... please... I... I might need someone to cover me if I flip out." He tilted the bottle back, lips sealed around it, and chugged the rest of his beer, tossing it in the trash can. "And to pour me out at the hospital once I get smashed," he tacked on as he stood up.

Toshiya nodded and set his beer aside instead of finishing it since he'd be driving. He also made a mental note to not drink much at the party for the same. "Okay, gonna grab a quick shower then I'll be ready to go." He pushed himself up from the couch, making his way to shower area, squeezing Die's shoulder on his way past.

Die sat there on the couch, staring down at his hands for a long few minutes before he finally got himself pulled up off the seat and made his way past the staff and into the showers as well. He came face-to-face with Kaoru the moment he stepped inside, and he winced, looking away, ashamed of how easily he'd broken over this.

Kaoru reached over and gently squeezed his arm. "If you need anything, I'm going to stay up late tonight," he offered quietly.

"Come to the party... I... I have to go." Die pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it on the bench. "Miyavi and Motokatsu have no idea that I'm in a relationship with him... and we never changed our emergency contacts on the paperwork with the hospital, so I won't be allowed in unless he wakes up and asks for me anyway." He was getting tired of repeating himself and he shut his mouth as he shoved his boots off and then unfastened his pants, letting them fall on the bench, completely unfazed by his nudity though usually he'd be almost ashamed of it.

Kaoru quietly handed him his own shower bag, realizing Die didn't have his with him, and then lightly gave him a push in the correct direction. "I'll go, but I'll meet you there. Got some things to take care of real fast... regarding... what happened." He sighed and slipped away, leaving Die stumbling into the showers in a daze.

Toshiya was nearly finished when Die walked in and he listened to his and Kaoru's conversation, feeling a pang of sympathy for his boyfriend for having to deal with the crap on this end. He sighed and rinsed his hair then reached and shut off the water, grabbing up his towel and drying off. 

He stepped out of the stall to finish drying and quickly redressed. "Die, I'll be in the dressing room whenever you're ready," he called as he made his way to said location to brush and dry his hair and put his jewelry back on.

Die scrubbed off in a complete state of hazy confusion. Once he was done, he found a towel that Kaoru had kindly placed under his new change of clothing. He picked up the towel and dried himself off, quickly pulling on his new clothing and putting all of his stuff in his pockets. Making his way back into the dressing room, he pretty much fell on the couch and closed his eyes.

Toshiya glanced up when Die returned and frowned a little. "Ready to go then? Or would you like a few minutes?"

Die opened one eye and then sighed softly, shrugging a little bit. "Yeah... we'll go." He pushed himself up and picked up the other half of Toshiya's beer from earlier, sucking it down and tossing the bottle away. He licked his lips and then gestured. "After you."

Toshiya frowned at the beer but let it go, leading the way out to his waiting car that staff had pulled around for him. He unlocked and opened the passenger side then climbed into the driver's seat, buckling up and waiting on Die before heading out to the location of the party.

Die slid into the passenger seat and then buckled in. He tilted his head back and just sat there, pursing his lips as he stared up at the roof of the car.

Toshiya made it to the small, private club in record time and was soon exiting the car and handing the valet his key. He opened the passenger door and lightly nudged Die, nodding towards the entrance. "C'mon, we're here...I'm sure everyone is waiting by now." He knew that Die likely didn't care either way but he didn't really know what else to say.

Die blinked himself out of his stupor and slid out of the car, closing the door and making his way toward the doors, pulling his sunglasses on as he got out. He headed inside and licked his lips a little bit as he passed through the doors, no one stopping him at all.

He pursed his lips and headed straight toward the back room. Stepping into the slightly darker area, he went to the back table of people who were expecting him, plopping down on one of the chairs and holding up three fingers. "Whiskey," as one of the waitresses swooped in toward them.

Toshiya casually followed behind Die, greeting a few people he knew on the way then being pulled to one of their tables. He glanced back at Die and saw that he was with the others so he relented and settled with the people that had called him out. He ordered a beer then sat back, trying to chat casually with his own group while keeping an eye on the guitarist.

Die's drink arrived in record time and he just pulled the waitress aside and paid her the amount for the whole bottle, sitting it next to himself as he pulled the glass over and downed the contents.

He looked up and then tried to fit a fake smile onto his face, quietly interjecting in the conversation every few minutes as he normally would have, though far less animated than usual.

A half hour into the party, Toshiya finally managed to break away from the group that had nabbed him at the start and he made his way over to Die's table, frowning a little at the bottle of whiskey. He didn't say anything though and just sat down next to the guitarist, accepting a one armed hug from a very happy and drunk Miyavi who immediately started showing him pictures of his daughters on his phone.

By the time Toshiya showed up at his table, Die had already drank most of the bottle of whiskey and wasn't looking too great around the edges. His answer to almost everything was, "Hnn," or, "Mmm..." whenever he was asked something.

No sooner had Toshiya sat down than Die picked up the bottle and emptied the rest of the contents into his glass, the ice long since gone. He put the bottle in the center and picked up the glass, downing the contents in one swallow, thumping the glass back down hard on the wood.

Toshiya "ooh'd" and "ahh'd" at Miyavi's pictures for a bit then suddenly something caught the younger man's attention and he was off, leaving Toshiya free to turn to Die and give him a pinched look. "The whole bottle? How you holding up?"

Die stared glassily at Toshiya, trying to figure out what the bassist was saying. After a moment, he shrugged. "I'm f-" but he didn't get the whole word out. Rather, he tuned a rather distinct shade of pale and pushed his way back from the table. With more grace than he'd managed the entire night, he left the room as quickly as was humanly possible, darting off down the hallway to the bathrooms. He narrowly made it inside and definitely didn't make it to the toilets, barely shoving the lid off the trashcan in time before he leaned over it and lost everything he'd put in his stomach since arriving in a rather violent sort of manner.

Toshiya saw Die's face change color and knew immediately what was going one. He gave the guitarist a few moments head start then followed him, standing outside the bathroom until the sounds stopped. He pushed his way inside then and get some paper towels, wetting them then going to Die and handing them to him, a vaguely ill expression on his face.

Die had managed to sag against the wall by the time the bassist slipped inside. He accepted the paper towels and wiped his mouth and then his hands, tossing the paper towels in the trash bin and then shakily making his way to the sinks. Leaning heavily on one, he turned it on and leaned over, rinsing his mouth and then washing his hands. When he pushed his sunglasses back, it was rather obvious he was crying again, tears streaking down his cheeks and his eyes bloodshot. He wiped his face with a wet hand and then grabbed more paper towels, drying himself up and shoving his sunglasses back in place with a soft, "Apparently... I'm not fine."

Toshiya watched Die then sighed, moving over to pull him into a hug, rubbing his back. "Die, there's no use tearing yourself up over it. He's going to be okay...he'll wake up soon and then you can go to him." No sooner had he said this than the sound of a phone going off filled the bathroom. Toshiya patted his pockets then shook his head. "It's not mine, it must be yours."

Die pulled back from Toshiya, reaching into his pocket and yanking his phone out, realizing Kaoru had been kinder to him than he'd ever thought, having remembered to turn his ringer back on for him since he probably knew he'd be drunker than shit by now. He answered the unfamiliar number and murmured, "Hello?"

He listened for a few seconds and then hung up without a word, one shaking hand covering his mouth. When he finally found his voice again, he murmured, "Hospital. Now."

Toshiya's eyes went wide then he was wrapping his arm around Die's shoulders and guiding him out the door. He'd make excuses for their absence later but for now, he was focused on getting outside. He gave the valet his ticket and waited anxiously for the car to be brought around and when it was, he got Die into the passenger seat then got into his own seat before taking off for the hospital. As he drove, he glanced at Die then sighed. "What is it? Is he okay?"

Die sank into the seat, thankfully feeling less like he was going to hurl again and praying to god he didn't do it in Toshiya's car if he did need to. When the question came, he gave a little nod. "He's set up a fit with the nurses apparently, refusing to stop bothering them until he's got me there with him. He updated his paperwork and they filed it to let me in." He sighed and pushed his hand through his hair, looking obviously on edge and much worse for the wear than he would have liked right then.

Toshiya let out a laugh before he could stop it then shook his head. "Feisty little fucker..." He drove as fast as he felt like he could and soon they were pulling up to the hospital. "Go ahead, I think I'm going to head back to the party, catch up with Kaoru. Call me if you need me."

Die reached to pat Toshiya's arm and issued a quiet, "Thank you," before he pulled himself out of the car. He stuck his head back in and murmured, "Just tell them you took me home because I puked I guess." 

Toshiya nodded, giving Die a thumbs up. "Good luck..." With that, he left, heading back to the party and his own boyfriend, mentally thanking the Gods that Kaoru was not stubborn in the way Kyo was. 

Die backed up and closed the door, making his way to the entrance and then inside, going up to the desk and signing for a visitor pass before asking what floor Kyo was on. Once he was directed in the correct direction, he made his way as quickly as he could.

The elevators turned out to be the wrong thing for him to take and Die got off feeling like he was going to hurl at any second. But he managed to choke it back, finding the nurses station and asking for Kyo's room. They gave him quite the disgusted look and he was sure he reeked of puke and whiskey. Wincing, he followed after them and slipped into the room, shooing the nurses away and closing the door before he rounded the curtain.

Kyo was lying in the hospital bed, having been stripped of his clothing and put into an ugly blue gown, various IVs attached as well as a heart monitor and oxygen, which he kept removing. When he heard the door open and close, he struggled to sit up some, his arms crossing over his chest. "Go away."

Die stopped when he heard Kyo's voice tell him to go away. Granted, he looked like hell... smelled like shit... and frankly, he was certain Kyo was going to be mad at him for not having remembered to have them update their paperwork before this. But why the hell would Kyo rage to get him here and then tell him to go away? Tears swam in his eyes, thankfully hidden behind his sunglasses still as he put his hand on the curtain and bowed his head. "I'm sorry," he whispered out, his voice cracking.

Kyo blinked a little then finally properly saw Die standing there. "Die...," he called out hoarsely, flailing a little with the tubes sticking in him. "....I thought you were that bitch nurse."

Relief flooded through Die so intensely that he almost felt like he was going to pass out. He clung to the curtain for dear life for a moment before finally orienting properly with the world again and making his way to Kyo's side, falling into the chair beside his bed and grasping his hand tightly in his own. "So scared," he managed to get out, the words almost stuck in his throat.

Kyo shifted onto his side to look at Die, squeezing his hand, letting out a huff of breath. "I'm sorry..." He closed his eyes, laying there for several minutes without speaking again, truly and utterly exhausted at this point, having spent the tiny amount of energy he had left demanding that Die be here. After a while, he cracked his eyes opened and looked at his lover, swallowing thickly as tears suddenly spilled down his cheeks, a shuddering sob wracking his body. "I'm so..s-stupid."

Die sat there in the chair, tears slowly trailing down his cheeks from behind his glasses, something he couldn't have stopped no matter how badly he wanted to. When Kyo started to cry, Die instantly ripped off his sunglasses, casting them on the table beside Kyo and pushing himself up. Leaning over Kyo, he pulled the other into his arms as best he could, and began stroking his hair. "Yes... yes you are, you fucker. But I love you," he hissed out in his ear, lightly tugging on the other's short blonde hair. He hated that there wasn't enough of it to really truly grip and he cursed it silently in his head, hoping it'd grow back out soon. After a moment, he realized he was forcing himself to think in terms of future, in terms of okay, and he pressed a hard kiss to Kyo's mouth before he pulled back and framed his lover's face with his hands. "You're staying here until you're better. Period. I mean it and I will do everything in my power to force the issue, so don't try me."

Kyo swallowed hard, fighting to get himself under control because he knew it was making things worse. When Die hugged him however, he lost it again, wrapping his freer arm around Die and clinging to him. He finally took a shuddering breath and looked up at Die, nodding a little. "Fine..." He sighed, closing his eyes as he reached up to push his fingers in Die's hair. His arm trembled with the action and he hated it, hated being so fucking weak.

Die leaned in and kissed Kyo once again, this one gentle and reverent. He settled back down and then sighed softly, running his fingers through his own hair and then wincing, suddenly realizing he'd been kissing Kyo after he'd thrown up earlier. "Fuck... I'm so sorry," he murmured. "Uh... I'll be back in just a second." Pushing himself up, he headed toward the bathroom, slipping inside and quickly washing out his mouth using the mouthwash from the wall dispenser. He quickly relieved his aching bladder, and then washed up and came back out with a small cup of mouthwash and another of water for Kyo, coming to sit next to him again and handing it over. "I... uh... sorry."

Kyo sniffed a little, making at face when Die kissed him again because it had tasted so very obviously like alcohol and puke. He sighed and watched Die go to the bathroom then come back, taking the mouthwash and rinsing his own mouth before drinking down some of the water. "It's okay...how much did you have? And for that matter...where were you that you could drink? I thought you were downstairs..."

Die bowed his head and looked very obviously ashamed. "The after party. Everyone was expecting me and the only one there that knew was Zenji..." he sighed and shook his head. "I couldn't not go or there'd be talk and I knew you wouldn't like talk. And... well... the paperwork." He let out a soft sob. "I'm so sorry, I drank the whole bottle and two beers and..." he pressed the back of his hand to his mouth.

Kyo stared at his lover as he confessed, his lips pressing in a thin line. He knew, deep down, that he shouldn't be angry with Die for going to the after party. After all, he was right, people would question it too much and he wasn't exactly ready for the whole world to know. Still, he couldn't help but think of Die having a good time at a party while he was here, being poked and prodded and frozen with ice packs. "I see..." It was all he could really come up with and after he said it, he just leaned back, closing his eyes again.

Die let out a soft sob as he bowed his head and pressed his forehead to the bed. "Don't even think that I had fun at all... I drank myself stupid and I threw up in a fucking trashcan," he breathed out, shuddering slightly. "All I wanted was to be here... right here with you, but the fucking rules-" he broke off, unable to speak any longer, his fingers clenching tight on Kyo's hand.

Kyo looked at Die with a miserable expression on his face, his jaw clenched tightly. He took in a shaky breath then pulled his hand away, scooting himself over in the bed. "Die...please...I just....I need you..please."

Die's fingers grasped at air for a moment and then he lifted his head to stare at Kyo, biting his lower lip harshly and then sighing. He reached for Kyo and gently slid his hand over the other's face. "I'm here... I'm not leaving. I won't leave. Not for anything."

Kyo just nodded, reaching out to grasp Die's arm, unable to stop the trembling of his lip. He sniffed and leaned into Die's hand, shivering a little. "I'm so tired...and cold...and hot."

Die shifted a little bit. "Do you want me beside you?" he asked quietly. "Or here?"

Kyo immediately moved on the bed again. "Beside me, please..." He fought with the IV tubes again then settled, pushing the oxygen tube away completely.

After a few moments, Die pushed himself up off the chair and then onto the bed, kicking his shoes off and then settling on his side next to his lover. He sighed quietly and reached to run his hand over Kyo's cheek. "I love you, baby. Rest."

Kyo immediately curled into Die, his hand coming up to fist in his shirt, a shiver going through him before he settled again with a sigh. "Love you, too..." He fell asleep shortly after though it was fitful, fever dreams and shivers wracking his body.

Die curled himself protectively around Kyo, exceptionally tired but completely unable to even pass out from the alcohol. Rather, he kept constant watch over Kyo's vitals, his eyes roving the screens over and over, calling the nurses in when his fever spiked during the night, and then shooing them away when they came in to try to wake him up later on in the morning, refusing to move away from the other, no matter what.


	43. Chapter 43

The whole ordeal had been honestly just as hard on Die as it had been on Kyo. Well, perhaps that was overstating it a bit. But Die had found himself horribly hungover the following morning, throwing up every fifteen minutes for a good couple of hours. When he'd finally kept enough water down to recover, a nurse had shoved an IV in his arm and put him in the corner of the room to sulk. As if that hadn't been a wonderful highlight of the whole thing, Die found that his back ached awfully from the awkward position he kept putting himself in at night while sleeping on Kyo's hospital bed. And when he'd tried to sleep in the chair, he'd only managed to keep snorting himself awake every five minutes.

The entire week had been filled with one thing after another fucking itself up for Die. Vending machines that ate his money and gave no snacks, coffee that spilled all over his crotch, burned his nuts, and made him walk around looking like he'd pissed himself for several hours until it dried... and maybe worst of all, the phone calls from every concerned person he'd ever known. Die repeated himself until he was blue in the face, all the while trying to pretend he wasn't completely heartbroken over Kyo's current state of wellbeing.

When, at long last, they finally agreed to let Kyo out so that he could go home for one night before the show, they showed Die how to give him his IV drip and then sent them off with strict instructions not to fuck anything up.

Kyo signed his forms and Die poured him into his car that Shinya and Toshiya had thoughtfully brought to sit in the parking lot of the hospital. And when they got home, Die immediately put Kyo to bed, refusing to let him do anything else other than eat a little bit and use the restroom.

That night, he fell asleep on the bed beside Kyo, still completely dressed, and feeling thankful they owned a bed that wasn't nearly as tiny as the stupid gurney in the hospital.

When Die finally awoke, it was to the insistent sound of text after text coming in to his phone. Picking it up, he glowered at the screen, his brother's name and at least 30 messages on it having been the source of his interrupted sleep. Sitting up, he scrolled through them and then finally returned, _Trying to sleep, asshole... I'm exhausted and you know why. I'll see you tonight, so calm down._ Once that was sent, he turned to peer blearily at Kyo. "Baby?"

For Kyo's part, he hated every moment he was in the hospital, attached to noisy machines and forced to ask for help every time he had piss due to the IVs. It didn't help that he felt like crap and his voice sounded like he'd swallowed rocks. All in all, the only thing that kept him the least bit sane was Die being there. He even managed a laugh at his lover being forced to have an IV of his own from drinking himself into a stupor the night before. 

Finally, a couple of days later and after much bargaining with both doctors _and_ Die, he was released and allowed to go home before the concert. He had intended to do vocal training pretty much as soon as he got home, but instead was forced back into bed by Die, who was playing nursemaid and nagging wife at the same time. He couldn't blame him though and despite his protests, he found it endearing. The next morning found him sleeping rather peacefully, his body very happy to be back in his own bed. His hair stuck up at odd angles and stubble darkened his face as well as the bags under his eyes. He awoke to Die's voice and blinking his eyes open sleepily, peering at him from between his lashes. "Mm?"

Die stared at Kyo for a long few moments before yawning widely and then pushing himself up, going to check Kyo's IV, which was still about half an hour from finishing. He smacked his lips a little and then murmured, "Need to piss... you need help in there, too?"

Kyo sniffed and shifted around, deciding that yes, he did indeed have to piss. "Uh huh...really need a shower... and a shave too." He wrinkled his nose, bringing his hand to rub over his scruffy cheek.

Die nodded a little. "Right-o." He reached up and took the IV bag down from the hook, holding out his arm for Kyo to use to stand up. "C'mon, sweet thang. Let's get your stubborn ass all fixed up for tonight, yeah?"

Kyo shifted to a sitting position and stared hatefully at the IV bag for a moment before nodding and pushing himself to his feet, leaning heavily on Die's arm for a moment while he waited for the world to stop spinning. He offered his lover a smile for his comment then moved with him into the bathroom, huffing out a sigh once they were there. "Great, walking ten feet exhausts me, this is gonna be fantastic."

Die reached down and pulled the toilet seat up, slipping up behind Kyo and wrapping one arm around his waist, the other still holding his IV bag. "Hush and piss," he offered quietly.

Kyo gave a disgruntled look then shifted forward, reaching down to pull himself free of his underwear and grasp his cock, aiming at the toilet and starting to relieve himself into the bowl. After what seemed like forever, the stream tapered off and he let out a sigh, finally shaking off then tucking himself away. "At least they didn't make you measure it like they were in the hospital."

Die arched his eyebrow. "Fluid intake and outake, I assume?" He pursed his lips a little bit and then gently scooted Kyo off to the side. "Excuse me for a moment or this is going to be a giant mess." Still holding the IV bag aloft, he pulled the front of his pajama pants down and leaned forward, groaning softly as he started to piss.

Kyo grumbled and nodded. "Yeah, something about the fever possibly dehydrating me, blah blah blah." He shifted aside and leaned against the counter so Die could take care of his own needs. "When can I detach this damn thing?" he questioned, plucking at the IV in his hand.

"Stop pulling at it," he murmured softly, "It's got like twenty minutes left." Die sniffed a little and finished up, reaching to flush the toilet, pulling his pants back up and then scooting back over. "Sit and I'll shave you... if you'll trust me with the razor."

Kyo made a face then nodded, carefully pushing himself up onto the counter, giving a yawn then settling again. "What time is sound check?"

"Whatever time I get you there." Die leaned over and hooked the bag over the side of the mirror so it'd stay up and keep draining into the other's body. He leaned over and pulled out the shaving cream and Kyo's razor. Squirting foam into his hand, he leaned over and started to rub it over Kyo's chin, cheeks, and upper lip.

The vocalist looked faintly annoyed at that, but accepted it, and shifted to make himself more comfortable. He puffed out his cheeks a little as Die rubbed cream over them then relaxed his face, not interested in doing anything that would get him cut. "You're wonderful, you know that?"

Die leaned in and kissed Kyo on the nose ever so gently. He flicked his tongue out to lick at the other's skin and then pulled back, picking up the razor and turning on the water in the sink. Wetting the razor, he moved to start shaving Kyo's face, doing it so carefully one would have thought he were using a straight-razor.

Kyo's lips quirked up in a smile then he settled again, closing his eyes as the blade scraped over his face. At one point when Die pulled away to rinse the razor, he huffed out a laugh. "I don't think I've had this much stubble in years."

"Stubble no. Beard, yes." Die chuckled. "I should have taken a picture of the mustache you started. Seriously... let's not grow that out. It's as bad as mine." He washed the razor again and then made a face at Kyo to imply he should stretch his lip for him so he could shave off said offending object.

Kyo laughed. "What? Don't want me to look like Kaoru?" He grinned then pulled his lip over his top teeth, stretching it properly for Die, ending up making a monkey face.

"Nope," he murmured, "I like my Kyo darling." Die shaved off the offending hair and then rinsed off the razor again, reaching to wet a cloth and clean Kyo off, checking to see if he got everything. Once he was sure he had, he leaned in and kissed Kyo's Adam's apple and then pulled back, lathering himself up and picking up his own razor to work on his own stubble.

A smile graced his lips before he once again stretched his lip out for Die. He let out a sigh of relief once the shaving cream was wiped off and reached out to run his hand through Die's hair. "Thank you, baby." He shifted to the side a little, looking at the IV to see how much it had left and was happy to see it was nearing the bottom. He turned back to watch Die shave, a content look on his face.

Die let out a soft hum as the other gently touched his hair. He finished up quickly and then washed his face off with the towel. He reached up and touched the bag. "Like five more minutes, tops." Settling back in front of Kyo, he leaned in and lightly ghosted his lips over Kyo's own. "Okay, so... teeth now?"

Kyo nodded then pecked Die's lips. "Yes, please." He moved himself off the counter and waited for Die to get the stuff out, figuring that he would just let his lover baby him for now.

Die pulled out the toothpaste and toothbrush, handing it over to Kyo and then pulling out his own, promptly wetting the brush and starting to scrub at his teeth.

Kyo took his brush and wet it, adding a bit of toothpaste to it and then going after his teeth. After a moment, he spit into the sink then cupped his hand, bringing water to his mouth to rinse before spitting that out too and rinsing his brush. "Ah, so much better. I'm starting to feel human. All I need is a shower and a good meal."

Die chuckled softly, refraining from saying what he was actually thinking about right at that moment, not finding it appropriate with Kyo's current state. After a few more moments, Die finished up as well and then checked Kyo's bag again. Carefully, he reached to disconnect Kyo's IV from his arm, bringing his arm up and lightly kissing it before he picked up the container for sharps and stuffed everything inside, placing it in the trash bin and then going into the shower, pulling down the tiny seat from the side and then turning on the water to let it heat up for a moment. "You sit, I wash you. No arguments."

Kyo let out a huge sigh of relief when he was finally detached from the IV, taking his hand and scratching it vigorously after Die kissed it. He peeled the tape off and chunked it in the trash with the rest of the stuff then watched Die go to the shower and pull out the seat. He huffed a little but nodded, stripping himself then padded over to the shower, settling on the little seat. "Very well, nurse."

"At least call me nurse Andou, come on, now." He smirked a bit and then shucked off his own pants. He licked his lips a little and then slipped into the shower, reaching for the soap. He squirted some gel onto the loofah and then moved to rub his hands over it so he could get it lathered up. Once he was done, he shifted closer to Kyo and began to scrub lightly at the other's skin, looking completely like he was enjoying himself.

Kyo smirked a bit, shifting here and there as Die scrubbed him. "Fine. Nurse Andou...don't forget to scrub _everything_ nice and clean..."

"Don't you worry your sassy little ass, I'm not gonna forget anything." Die knelt down and soaped up the loofah again, starting to wash Kyo's thighs, peering up into his eyes as he smirked and then looked back down at what he was doing.

Kyo's smirked widened at that and he shifted forward on the seat, spreading his legs some. The truth was, it had been far too long since he'd had any sort of release and despite his condition, he found he really wasn't opposed to finding relief.

Die slid the loofah over Kyo's body, trying to ensure he got the other completely clean in every single way, his touch gentle and in some ways almost reverent. Leaning in, he pressed his lips to Kyo's newly washed skin and then moved to clean even his feet really well.

Kyo sat there quietly as Die washed him so carefully, almost as if he was worshipping him. He reached out to run his hand over Die's slightly damp head, wiggling his toes as they were washed. "You're spoiling me, Daisuke."

"I'm washing you... properly." Die finished up and then went about getting some shampoo on his hands and then moving to start scrubbing it through Kyo's hair.

Kyo chuckled softly then leaned back a little as Die washed his hair, his hand sliding over his body for a moment. "Either way, I like it."

Die went through the motions, finishing up Kyo's shampooing and then the conditioning of his short blonde locks. Once he was done, he rinsed Kyo's hair a few times and then leaned in, kissing him hard on the lips. "Okay, you're done, sweetheart. Want to stay in here while I wash up or want to dry off and rest for a bit?"

Kyo kissed Die back then thought about it for a moment. "Mm, I'll stay here, the steam feels good." He reached out and ran his hand over Die's hip, flicking his eyes up to his face. "And the view's not bad either..."

Die's heart skipped a beat when Kyo touched him. It'd been over a week since they'd touched and in all honesty, it'd been six days since Die had even dared to do anything to himself. Hospitals were not conducive to even jerking off. But he had to keep himself in control and he damn well knew it. Smiling softly at his lover, he leaned in and then kissed him gently. Pulling back, he soaped up the loofah again and then started in on scrubbing himself, trying to keep his mind focused on the task at hand and off his cock.

Kyo smiled a little then contented himself with watching his lover bathe, inhaling the fragrant steam of the shower. After a few moments, he found he couldn't keep his hands to himself and ended up reaching out to trace a line down Die's back, following the rivulets of water that tracked down his spine.

A shudder ran through Die's body at his lover's touch. He pursed his lips a little bit and then licked his lips slightly. After a moment, he murmured, "You're being unfair, I hope you know that." He shifted, holding himself up against the wall as he scrubbed first one foot and then the other.

Kyo smirked behind Die's back, unable to help it. "I'm sorry, love, I can't help it." He tweaked Die's bum then stood up, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. "But, I will let you continue on in peace while I go dry myself." He smiled and slipped out of the shower, grabbing a towel and drying himself, finally feeling steadier on his feet. 

Once he deemed himself good and dry, he wandered back into their bedroom and lay down, nude, on the bed, completely spread eagle amongst their sheets and blankets.

Die watched his lover leave, heaving out a sigh once he was out of the room. Part of him wanted to jump right into giving himself some of the relief he was aching for, but the other part of him felt bad, knowing Kyo couldn't exert himself like that and it'd leave him more level-headed than Kyo. It just didn't seem fair. He put the conditioner in his hair and focused on trimming some of his more manly hairs before he finally rinsed everything off once more, got the conditioner out of his hair, and exited the shower stall. Wrapping a big fluffy black towel around himself, he padded out into the bedroom and settled on the edge of the bed. "What did you want to eat, baby?"

Kyo was slow to open his eyes when Die spoke to him, the exhaustion taking its toll. "Mm, you first...then something light." He smirked, sitting up, rubbing his hand through his hair.

"Well, we could get so-" he stopped, the first part of the sentence finally registering. His mouth moved like a fish for a moment and then he cleared his throat. "Well then." He shifted slightly, his body definitely reacting to that. After a moment, he sighed. "God you have no idea how fucking much I want you, but... you need your energy for tonight, not wasted on me."

Kyo smirked widely at Die's reaction, loving the way realization dawned on him. He chuckled then sighed at the rejection, sniffing a little. "I know..."

Die studied the other for a few long moments and then relented, slipping up closer to Kyo, gently rubbing his hand over his lover's thigh. "Do you need the relief though?" he asked quietly, leaning in to kiss Kyo's shoulder.

Kyo shifted into Die's touch, reaching out to tug damp red hair. "I always need to relief when it comes to you, baby." He left it at that, knowing that Die's concerns were legitimate.

With a soft sigh, Die moved his hand down over Kyo's belly and then down further, lightly dancing his fingers over the other's skin. "Just... don't strain." With that, he grasped Kyo's flaccid length, slowly starting to stroke him into arousal, his mouth lightly ghosting over Kyo's skin as he did so.

Kyo gazed at his lover's face then let out a soft gasp as his hand closed around his length, his body responding quickly to the stimulation. "Ah..Gods..." He slid his hand over Die's shoulder and back, lightly scraping the skin there with his nails.

Die licked lightly at the other's neck and then groaned softly as he started to actually jerk him off in a more intensive manner. The feeling of his lover's cock in his hand was honestly something he'd missed. His own arousal flooded through him and he knew if he got Kyo off, he'd have to fix his own problem.

Kyo groaned as Die's hand moved over him faster, his hips pushing up into calloused fingers. He couldn't stand not touching Die and soon his hand was travelling down his lover's chest, to his stomach and eventually curling around the base of his cock.

Die let out a loud groan when Kyo touched him. His hand came down over Kyo's hand, holding it in place as he shifted, starting to thrust into the other's hand as he moved his own over Kyo's cock. He didn't want Kyo exerting himself, but he had to admit, he was almost desperate to cum by his lover's hand.

Kyo turned his head and captured Die's lips in a heated kiss, his hand squeezing a little more firmly around Die's length. He moaned against those lips, his free hand tangling in Die's wet hair.

Die gasped and then shuddered, unable to even remotely focus. Pushing his lover's hand away, he whispered, "In a minute... I just... you first."

Kyo huffed a little but settled back, pillowing his head on his arm and focusing on the way Die's hand felt around his length. "Hnng...have it your way then."

Die squirmed a bit, shifting over the other's body and then leaning down, starting to suck Kyo's cock, moaning softly.

Kyo's eyes rolled back as pleasurably hot moisture surrounded his cock in the form of Die's mouth. He moaned loudly enough that it hurt his throat, but he didn't care, his hips pushing up into Die's mouth. "Baby...Gods..."

Die popped up off his dick and glowered at him for a moment. "Hush and enjoy quietly this time." With that, he was back down, his head moving quickly over his lover's cock.

Kyo raised an eyebrow, but snapped his mouth shut, trying hard not to make too much noise though the occasional whimper did slip out. He bit his lip and reached down, pushing his fingers into Die's hair, tugging a bit.

Die worked as quickly as he dared, head bobbing quickly, his cheeks hollowing out as he moved, moaning quietly.

The vocalist was almost at his peak, a huff of breath escaping him as he brought his other hand up to claw over his chest lightly. After another moment, he let out a quiet moan and started to cum, pushing up into Die's mouth.

Die sucked him until he was completely dry. After a moment, he pulled back and licked his ips. "Mmm... tastes like relief," he purred out, shifting onto his knees and then taking Kyo's hand, wrapping it around his length and then pushing forward into his hand. "Oh my god... yes," with a groan, he threw his head back and began thrusting.

Kyo groaned again, smirking down at his lover. "Felt amazing..." He shifted onto his side, getting at better angle in which he could stroke Die's length, though he let his lover do most of the work.

Die whined quietly, closing his eyes as he just went at it, aiming for his pure pleasure on the whole thing. He shuddered, starting to moan louder and louder, finally just holding Kyo's hand there, his other hand on the wall as he full-on humped against the other's hand. "Fuck! Kyo! I'm cumming!" he cried out, hips snapping forward one more time, his body shivering as he strained, and then he lost it, spurting out over the bedsheets beneath him.

Kyo flexed his fingers around his lover's cock as it slid in and out of his hand. He brought his thumb to stroke over the tip just as Die cried out his impending orgasm, a smirk on his lips as he watched him spill his load.

Die pumped a few more times and then groaned, falling onto the bed, off to the side with a sigh of relief. "Oh lord, I needed that," he breathed out quietly, closing his eyes.

Kyo chuckled softly, bringing his hand to his lip and licking off the little bit of Die's cum that got on it. After, he let his own eyes slip shut, tiredness coming over him once again. He lifted one hand to his forehead and huffed with displeasure when he realized it was a bit warm. He refused to say anything though and simply reached out to grasp Die's hand. "Mmm...me, too," he murmured softly.

Die lay there for a long few moments before he finally squeezed Kyo's hand and then pushed himself upright. "Stay put." He licked his lips a little bit and then stood up, going to the dresser and getting some tissues to clean up what he'd just done to the bed.

Once he was done with that, he went to the bathroom and got Kyo two aspirin, coming back with a cup of water, handing it all to the other man. "Take this. I'll make some soup and get some crackers, yeah?"

Kyo sniffed and sat up a little, taking the water and aspirin, downing them both in one go. "Mm, sounds good, I'll be here." He smiled up at Die then shifted back down onto the bed, getting himself under the covers.

Die pulled on his underwear and then his jeans for the night, going downstairs. Starting up the soup, he quickly fed the pets and then frowned, tending to his few plants quickly, realizing that they'd forgotten to have someone water them. He put on some chicken noodle soup and then went about getting some crackers out and a little cheese for himself as well as a few grapes.

Once he was done, he poured the soup into two bowls and settled it all on a tray he'd laughed about having, and then wandered back upstairs with all of it plus a pot of tea.

After all of the activity of showering and then cumming, Kyo found himself tired once again and ended up falling asleep, even as the scent of chicken soup wafted up to his nose, making his stomach growl. He didn't even hear Die when he came back in, soft snores issuing from his half-open mouth.

Die carefully settled everything down on a chair that he pulled close to the bedside and then sat down beside his lover, gently shaking his hip. "Love... c'mon. Need you to wake up and eat."

Kyo came awake and stretched, smiling at Die softly. "Mm, okay." He shifted to a sitting position then pulled Die to him, kissing him softly. "I love you."

Die let out a quiet groan into the kiss, kissing him back and then chuckling softly. "I love you, too, you sweet, adorable man." He pressed a kiss to his nose and then sniffed. "Food."

Kyo grinned then reached for his bowl, settling it carefully in his lap and taking a bite, sighing as the warm liquid soothed his throat.

Die shifted to get his own food, looking pleased as he started eating his soup, just sipping it straight from the bowl because he was home and lazy.

The vocalist added some crackers to the soup, waiting for them to get a little soggy then slurping them up with a few noodles. After a few minutes, he picked his bowl up and tilted it back, draining the rest of the soup from it with a satisfied sigh. "I was starving..."

Die smiled as he took the bowl from his lower and put it down with his own, eating his cheese and then offering Kyo a grape. "Glad you're eating again finally. I just hope it's okay with your stomach. Don't need any more problems."

Kyo hummed and took the offered grape, nibbling it then taking another before pouring them both some tea, handing Die a cup. "Mm, yeah, definitely not." He sipped his tea then leaned back against the headboard, taking Die's hand and squeezing it.

Die reached to pat Kyo's hand gently and then poured him a little bit of tea, handing it over. "Here." He licked his lips a little bit. "So how are you feeling? We have about an hour before we should be going."

Kyo huffed a little, sipping the tea. "Should probably do the other IV then." He wrinkled his nose at the thought then sighed. "I can nap while it's going."

Die nodded, standing up and going to go get it. When he sat back down, he put the rubber band around Kyo's arm and then lightly felt over his arm. "The veins in your hand are getting too frail, do it here instead, okay?" He finally found one he liked, rolling it under his fingers, and then opened the package with the new needle in it, finding the vein once again and slowly sliding the needle into it, his eyes on what he was doing the entire time.

Kyo simply nodded his consent, eyes watching Die's actions. He winced as the needle slid through his skin then relaxed, letting out a breath. "You're so much gentler than the nurses."

"Because I don't have to do it four hundred times a day and I give a shit if you hurt or not." He held the needle in place with one finger and then taped it down. "Does it hurt at all? Feel strange?" He was fairly certain he got the vein, but there was the off-chance he pushed through it or under it.

Kyo snorted then shook his head. "No, it feels fine." He settled back, holding his arm out so that Die could attach the actual bag. "You know these damn antibiotics burn going in."

"I know." Die hung up the bag and then carefully turned the drip up so it'd be done in an hour. "Okay... shouldn't be any air in the lines, drip's started... you have fun taking a nap and for the love of god don't roll around." He smiled softly and then licked his lips a little.

Kyo smiled then huffed when the first drip hit his veins. He reached out and tugged Die down for a kiss then settled back, closing his eyes. "Okay, thank you, baby."

"Of course, my love." He planted another kiss on him carefully, and then stood up, going to find what he was going to wear for the evening. The next few minutes were spent doing that and then the next few after that dressing. Once he was fully finished, he leaned over the counter and began applying makeup for good measure, something he'd taken back into habit recently, just enjoying it while on stage.

Kyo soon fell asleep, despite the awkward angle his arm was stuck out at. He had a few weird dreams but thankfully, the wild, intense fever dreams seemed finally to be gone. He snuffled in his sleep then settled again, slipping into a deeper doze.

Die finished up everything and then laid out what Kyo had wanted to wear for the night. Once he was done, he came to sit back down next to Kyo, pulling his laptop onto his lap and starting to go through some of his email.

Just before time for the IV to be done, Kyo woke, turning onto his back and then sitting up, careful not to pull the tube connected to his arm. His voice was rough with sleep when he turned to speak to Die. "What time is it?"

Die had been looking through a rather explicit email, his eyes wide and his mouth parted when Kyo spoke up. He cleared his throat, deleting the email and then looked over at the other. "Umm.." his eyes flicked to the clock, "like ten minutes until you'll be done."

Kyo raised an eyebrow at the look on Die's face, a soft snort escaping him. "Cybering with some boyfriend I don't know about?" He was smirking a little as he said it, his hand moving to stroke over Die's arm.

Die gave him an alarmed look. "No." He sighed. "Fan sent some pretty explicit email and... well... I read everything I get." He flushed. "And it was pretty hot. I'm not sorry though, I mean... it was daring of them to send it and they sent me pretty much porn of me sucking an unnamed person's dick. I was just pretending it was you, that's all." He looked a bit ashamed. "But I guess I shouldn't have been reading it at all."

Kyo let out a soft laughed and shook his head. "Baby, I was teasing you. I don't care if you read the explicit crap your fans send you..." He shifted and ran his fingers through his hair, sighing a little. "Do my makeup tonight?"

Die flushed slightly, moving to put the laptop aside. He wandered off and when he came back, he sat down with his makeup bag, reaching to gently touch the side of Kyo's face. "Close your eyes. I'll do my best."

Once he started working, he sighed softly and then murmured, "Sometimes, I think the fans already know about my preferences."

Kyo waited for Die to come back then slipped his eyes shut, humming softly. "Who knows. With the way they write Gods know what in fanfiction, I doubt they know or care either way."

Die gave Kyo an amused look. "Fanfiction, hmm? You've read some then?" He began stroking the black liner around Kyo's eyes.

Kyo's cheeks reddened slightly and he let out a huff. "You aren't the only one to get erotica in your inbox. Though my fans prefer to send me far kinkier things than blowjobs."

Die chuckled. "Dude, you should really show me some of this sometime." He wet his lips a little bit and then carefully brushed the eyeliner in so it wasn't so stark, going back to do eyeshadow and then lightly blowing on his face, trying to make sure the extra came off now, not later.

Kyo snorted, opening his eyes once Die was done. "They're pretty graphic at times but yeah, the next time I get around checking it, I'll pull some out for you." He glanced at the bag and nodded to it. "It's done. Want to pull it out or would you like me to?"

Die kissed Kyo's cheek gently and then reached to pull the IV from his arm, recapping it and leaving it there, leaning in to kiss Kyo harder on the mouth, groaning as he really went for it.

Kyo grunted as the IV was removed then groaned a little at the kiss, eagerly returning it, his hand moving up to cup the back of Die's neck.

Die pulled back, gasping softly, and then flushed. He settled back and crossed one leg over the other, examining Kyo's makeup. "Mmm... once you're better, I'm ravaging you within an inch of your sanity." With that, he got up and went to go put his bag away.

Kyo nipped at Die's lip before he could pull away. "You better." He sat up and moved into the bathroom to take a piss, taking his clothes with him. Once he was dressed, he stood in front of the mirror and smoothed a small bit of mousse into his hair, combing it back and getting it styled just so. Once that was done, he opened the medicine cabinet and took out the heavy duty pain killers that had been prescribed especially for tonight. Taking two, he washed them down with some water and then moved back to their bedroom, sliding on his jewelry then finally declared himself ready.

Die watched Kyo move around and then finally got up when his lover said he was ready, moving off with the other toward the stairs, holding out his arm. "Hold on to me, I'm not letting you down these stairs without it."

Kyo looked at Die's arm then nodded in agreement because there was no denying that while he may be able to walk on a flat surface, stairs would probably make him rather woozy. "Okay, let's go." He took the first step then the second and then the third, wobbling a little on that one and holding fast to Die. "Fucking hate being sick," he mumbled irritably as they progressed further.

"Yeah, I know," Die murmured softly. He got them onto the first floor and then steered Kyo over to the door, kneeling down and helping him with his boots before pulling on his own. His phone went off and he groaned, pulling it out and looking at it. "Fuck... more party invites." He glanced at Kyo and then licked his lips a little, shoving the phone back in his pants without answering. He was not getting in this shit again, which reminded him. "Baby, I changed my information at the hospital. Now you're the emergency contact."

Kyo stomped his feet in his boots, getting them on just right then looked at Die, cocking his head. "Baby, you should go to the after party. It's expected...I'll probably just come home and sleep anyway." He smiled a little then reached out, taking Die's hand. "Good, I don't want another mess like that. I was miserable not having you there even for that time..."

"I'm not making any obligations, Kyo. If you collapse again, I'm damn well going to the fucking hospital with you." He gave Kyo a hard look and then sighed, shaking his head. "I'm not okay with everything going how it went last time."

Kyo gave Die a pinched look but nodded, not having liked that Die drunk himself sick during that. "Well, if it all goes well, I want you to go and I mean it." He moved to get into the car, settling in the passenger seat.

Die nodded. "Okay, fine, I will as long as you're fine. If you're not, I flat out refuse though." He got into the car and closed the door, starting the car, and then pulling out, heading toward the venue. "Showing up in a car may be the stupidest thing I've ever done."

Kyo nodded then turned to look at Die. "Why do you say that?"

"License plate number... if they see us get out, someone will probably be lame enough to track it." He shrugged a little.

Kyo wrinkled his nose at the thought the shrugged a bit. "We'll just have to be extra careful." He shifted and leaned back, watching the scenery go by.

Die navigated the roads mostly in silence the rest of the way, finally pulling into the back lot, glad his windows were tinted. He got the car close enough to allow Kyo to get out really close to the back door.  
When they'd finally stopped at the venue, Kyo grabbed his bag and carefully exited the car, keeping his head down in case anyone had managed to get back there. He didn't wait for Die, knowing his lover would find him in his quiet room in a few moments so he slipped into the venue's back door. After greeting a few people, he found what he called his personal space during shows, a quiet corner, sometimes an entire room that he could either close a curtain or door to and meditate. He was pleased to see mat for him to sit on as well as a pitcher of water and a pot of hot tea already for him. He set his bag down and settled on the rug, sending a silent prayer to the Gods for the show to go well.

Die parked the car and then wandered into the venue, coming to the stage to quickly do sound check before he slipped backstage again and went to go wait outside Kyo's dressing room, waiting on the others.

After running through his vocal warm ups and taking some throat medicine, Kyo finally sat back and relaxed, pulling his phone out to text Die. _"Come in here for a min, please?"_

Die pulled out his phone when it rang, flicking the ringer off, and then closed his phone, tucking it back into his pocket after seeing the text. He knocked on the door and then slipped inside. "Kyo?"

Kyo looked up when Die came and beckoned him over. "Shut the door," he murmured softly.

Die closed the door and then came over toward Kyo, kneeling down. "What's up, baby?"

Kyo smiled and pulled Die forward, kissing him deeply, more lovingly than anything else. "I just really wanted to kiss you before we went on."

Die groaned softly into the kiss, gently kissing Kyo back before he pulled away and reached to cup his cheek. "Thank you for that, my darling."

Kyo grinned widely, running his hand over Die's arm before standing up, stretching a bit then rolling his shoulders. "About time, mm?"

Standing up, Die licked his lips a little bit and then nodded. "Yeah, it is." He sighed softly. "All my best tonight, okay?"

Kyo nodded, reaching out for another hug then swatted Die's ass. "Do your best, love and I'll do mine."

Die gasped and then chuckled softly. "Indeed," he murmured softly. "I'll do my best and you... stay upright, okay?"

Kyo nodded and moved for the door. "I'll try my best." He grinned a little then opened the door, letting them out. "The staff are prepared this time, at least. I saw them with a ton of ice packs, water and towels."

Die nodded, following Kyo out. Once they got to the hallway, Die gestured the other's toward them, taking a deep breath and attempting to steady himself.

Kyo got into the group huddle, looking around at everyone. Kaoru asked him how he felt and he told him he was well enough. They formed a circle and put their hands in, readying themselves.

Kaoru led the chant and then pushed their hands down and then back up.

Die smirked a little bit and then popped their hands back up, his own on the bottom. Taking a deep breath, he turned around and then headed out on stage, not a single backwards glance.

Kyo felt the energy building when they did the chant. Everyone broke ranks and started onto the stage, leaving him there last to focus one more time on mentally preparing himself. 

He heard his cue and came on stage to the roar of the fans. For a moment, he was overwhelmed but then he started into the first song, giving it his all.

Die sank himself into the music completely zoning into everything in front of him, just praying Kyo was going to be okay through the whole ordeal.

Kyo did fine the first couple of songs but found that his voice could not bare the strain and he ended up improvising with hand motions and dances. He rested a lot on his crate as well but also found spurts of energy here and there. 

The encore came and he went backstage, receiving more meds and water. Then he went out to the first notes of Jealous -reverse-, standing there silently before starting in on the lyrics. It was just a few short lines into the song before he could pick up the sound of the crowd singing in almost perfect harmony with him and he found himself overwhelmed. Emotions crashed hard into him, pushing tears from his eyes and causing him to choke up, unable to go on. He stood there trembling, reaching up to pull his ear monitor, listening to the fans go right on singing, singing for him.

Die found himself distraught enough to have to pull his hood up on his outfit for the night, honestly more than a little bit on the freaked out end of things as Kyo decided jealous - reverse- was the answer to the night's encore. Honestly, he still wasn't sure why they were doing an encore to start with when his voice wasn't fairing so well, but he knew Kyo had a thing about tonight... somewhere inside, they all did. After all, it being the first time playing this venue since the first time they had... three mere days after hide's death, it was a big moment that none of them could have stood not to play.

Kyo pushed through the final parts of the song, his voice cracking and trembling but he didn't care, the voices of the fans swarming around him. At the end of the song, he leaned forward against his crate, panting heavily, definitely weak. 

After a few moments, he stepped back to take a drink of water then slipped his monitor back in, starting into Rasetsukoku, giving it his all for the rest of the show, for the fans and for the memory of this place.

Die and the others instantly joined in as they were supposed to, Die stepping from the shadows and quickly making his way to the front of the stage to rile up his side of the crowd.

The minutes slipped past and finally they came to an end, playing The Final. As Die struck the last note, he looked down to find a few fans on his side crying, and he honestly couldn't blame them in the least. Kneeling down, he tossed picks right at the more distressed ones and then launched some fully out into the crowd, standing up and going to the other side to repeat his actions.

The end came, Kyo pushed hard through to the end, all but screaming the last notes then standing there with his hands pressed together, held high over his bowed head for a few moments before bringing the Moto up and speaking quietly into it. "Minna-san, arigatou gozaimasu." And with that, he bowed again and left the stage, knees weak as he made his way down the short steps there. 

He headed to the dressing rooms and was immediately handed an ice pack, a cold towel and water. He put the towel on his head and after downing half the water, leaning back and settled the ice pack over his throat with a sigh.

Die left the stage soon after, hurrying down the hallway to Kyo's dressing room. He came to slip into Kyo's dressing room and settled down on the seat next to him. "Are you okay?" he asked softly.

Kyo looked up when Die entered and gave him a tired smile, reaching out to take his hand, squeezing it hard. In a strained voice, he whispered, "I'm fucking exhausted but I'm fine...or I will be, at least."

Die smiled softly and then reached to cup his cheek gently. "I love you," he murmured quietly, pushing his hand back through Kyo's sweaty hair. "You were amazing on jealous -reverse- tonight."

Emotions flitted across Kyo's eyes and he reached out to stroke his hand over Die's face. "I couldn't make it through it but...the fans made it a very special moment." For a split second, his lip trembled but then he pulled it between his teeth, stilling it and getting a hold on himself once more. "I think you should go to the after party, Koi. After a live like this, they'll definitely be expecting you even if you didn't respond." He smiled and leaned forward, pressing his lips to Die's. "And I love you, too."

Die pulled Kyo in and kissed him hard to help him cover up the quivering in his lip. When he pulled back, he licked his lips and then smiled softly at him. "I'll send rediculous pics all night, okay?"

Kyo grinned a little and nodded, reaching out to spear his fingers through Die's messy hair. "It's a deal. Now go shower and take me home first, you can be a gentleman and even buy me dinner."

Die leaned in and smiled, pecking his lover's lips again for a moment. He pulled back and then danced off toward the showers, intent to get things moving quickly and then get Kyo back home.

Kyo stayed where he was for a while until finally changing into some sweats. He had already decided he'd take a lengthy shower or maybe a bath at home. He gathered his things then moved out into the main area to chat with his fellow bandmates, ensuring them as well that he was just fine.

Die took a shower in record time, quickly coming back out and finding Kyo, his bag over his shoulder. "Ready?" he asked quietly, then glancing at staff that didn't know, "I promised I'd take you home."

Kyo nodded, standing up and bidding everyone good night. "Yep, thanks again, just didn't really feel like getting a taxi." He had to hide a smirk as he wandered out the door, heading for Die's car.

Die rushed off toward the car. After a few minutes, they reached the car, and he slipped inside. Starting the engine, he smirked over at Kyo. "Sorry I had to sort of throw them off... new staff, not sure how trustworthy they are yet, you know? Not the news we need circulating."

Kyo smiled a little, reaching over to pat Die's leg almost absently. He was still thrumming with the energy of the show and his mind was still on stage and not exactly with the present just yet. "Mm, it's fine, baby."

Die pulled out and then headed off toward downtown. "Burger? Ramen? Fried rice?"

Kyo blinked a little, then yawned, stretching and causing his shirt to ride up. "Mm, fried rice sounds good."

Die glanced over and then reached to pat his abs. "Baby, your abs are distracting the driver." He pulled up to a stoplight and then smirked a little.

Kyo glanced over at Die and smirked, purposely pulling his shirt up some more, running his hand over his stomach. "I'm...not sorry."

"I'm sure." Die chuckled, looking back at the light and pulling out as it changed. He headed right for the little street-stand he knew was rather good.  
Kyo laughed then leaned back in the seat, running his hand over his stomach then over his thigh. When he saw where Die was headed, he mentally thought of their menu then turned to his lover. "Mm, get me the number 4, no chilies, extra garlic and a side of clear soup."

Die chuckled. "Feeling randy after the show, love?" He pulled up at the stall and parked along the street, blinkers on, and then smirked at Kyo before he slid out of the car.  
Kyo chuckled, finding that he did indeed feel a bit _randy_. "Despite my extreme exhaustion, yes, my libido has no suffered a bit." He smirked then settled back, waiting on Die to get his food, finding himself very thankful in that moment to have a lover so willing to do for him.

Die hurried through getting their meals, coming back to the car quickly, handing Kyo his bag and opening his own box, using a fork to start shoveling part of his food into his mouth, confident that eating before going to the party was definitely better.

Kyo grinned at Die once he was back in the car, deciding to wait til he got home. "Be honest with me, if I wasn't in such bad condition, would you take me home and fuck me against the door?"

Die swallowed the bite of rice he had in his mouth and then muttered, "I'd fuck you in the backseat of the fucking car." With that, another bite of food slipped into his mouth and he started chewing so he would be quiet and not give himself another problem to deal with.

Kyo smirked, obviously happy with that answer. He dug into the bag after a few minutes and got a napkin, reaching over to wipe the side of Die's mouth.

Die shivered a little bit when Kyo wiped his mouth up a bit. He pursed his lips a little and then glanced at Kyo when they stopped at a stop-light again. He almost told him to get well so he could fuck his brains out, but the other part of him knew that was just rude and definitely not nice. 

A few more minutes got them into their driveway and Die closed his food, shoving it in the bag and taking Kyo's as well, getting out, and coming around to his side, opening the door.

Kyo smirked at Die's reaction, loving teasing the other. He grabbed his bag and slide from the car then took the food bag. "Go have fun, baby, but don't drink and drive, okay? Get a taxi or something."

Die looked a bit disgruntled for a moment, but then nodded. "Yeah, okay, I'll do that." Coming inside, he turned off the alarm and then pulled out his phone, dialing a number and then quietly asking for a cab, giving his address. Once he was done, he went to get his food from the bag Kyo had snatched, finishing off the carton and tossing it in the trash.

Leaning against the counter, he sighed. "Small favor, next time don't turn me on before I go to a party you're not at, yeah?"

Kyo gave a soft smile as Die did what he asked, making his way inside and starting to pull out his food, reaching into a drawer and getting chopsticks. 

At Die's words, he looked up and a frown crossed his face, almost a pout. "I'm sorry, baby..."

Die chuckled softly. "On the plus side, if I end up desperately needing to jack off, I'll go to the bathroom and send you the photos, yeah?"

Kyo grinned, taking a bite of his food, chewing it slowly. "Mm, sounds good to me. Just make sure you're alone this time."

Die flushed a little and then nodded. "Yeah... bathroom stall or something." He tilted his head backwards. "Are you sure you're okay tonight, baby?"

Kyo was washing down his bite with some of the clear soup when Die asked if he would be okay. "Mm, yeah, I'll be fine. Gonna go take a bath, take my meds, curl up with the kittens and probably pass the fuck out before you're even remotely drunk."

Die reached to lightly flick his fingers under Kyo's chin. "Behave and call me if you need me home, I mean it."

Kyo smiled softly, catching Die's hand and pressing his lips to his palm. "Always, baby. Take lots of pics and send them to me, yeah?" He set down his food then moved to slip his arms around Die's waist, nuzzling against him for a moment.

A horn sounded outside and Die leaned in to kiss him lightly before ruffling his hair. "Be careful, hold the handrails getting up to bed, and rest, rest, rest. When I come home I'll put the IV bag in for you, okay?" He hugged him tight and then slipped out from around him and dashed off toward the door. "Love you, baby!"

Kyo wrinkled his nose at the horn then kissed Die deeply. "Yes, nurse Andou! I got it!" He laughed then waved to Die, calling out, "Love you, too!" After Die had left, he sat there and finished off his dinner then tossed the trash before grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge and heading slowly up the stairs for his bath.

Die made his way all the way to the party and once he arrived, he found that he could actually have a fairly good time knowing that Kyo wasn't in nearly as bad a condition as last time.

Wandering in to the party, he was immediately set upon by several people, all of them giving him multiple drinks. After a while, he found himself more than a little drunk, Motokatsu, Moto, and Boss all teasing him and trying to provoke him into doing strange things.

He sent off a few photos of his drinks and then finally, sent Kyo a photo of himself and Moto, flipping off the camera, and making silly faces.

Kyo was well finished with his bath and curled up on the bed with his computer and their two cats, fiddling around with some of his latest photo he'd taken. His phone went off and he grabbed it, looking at the messages Die had sent, laughing to himself. He simply texted back _"Goofball"_ then returned to his work, though his eyes were getting heavy.

The hours flipped by and Die was wheedled into more and more to drink. At long last, they all decided they were walking home, a group of four of them wandering off toward their homes. Die stumbled over the sidewalk, gasping sharply. Motokatsu grabbed him and Die giggled, pushing at his arm. "Fucking carry me home, shit! You assholes goes me drunk!"

Moto pulled out his camera, watching as Motokatsu swept Die up in his arms, the guitarist clinging to him to not fall, the pair laughing madly. After a few moments, Moto took the photo and then, laughing, sent it to Die's phone as well as the drummer's.

Die hopped down and pulled his phone out, sending a text off to Kyo with the photo in it, reaching to shove Motokatsu slightly and then bolted off down the street.

Kyo had given up on his photography and instead decided to troll his twitter, simply tweeting _"Fufu"_ before putting everything away and settling down to sleep. Hours later, he was awoken by his phone going off again and he scrambled for it in the darkness, squinting at the picture then busting out laughing at Die and his friends and their obvious drunken insanity. He shot a message back to his lover, taking several tries to get it right in his half-asleep state. _"Idiot :)"_

Nearly an hour later, Die arrived home sans his friends. Stumbling inside, he locked up the door and then wandered upstairs, laughing somewhat gleefully as he damn near fell on the stairs on the way up.

Getting up, Die wandered into the bathroom, taking a leak and then stumbling into the bedroom. He ripped off clothing as he went, entirely naked by the time he fell on the bed, crawling up next to Kyo and straddling him as he went about getting his new IV bag up on the hook and then pulling the supplies out of the drawer, quickly swabbing his arm and then tying him off, searching out the vein. Even in his intoxicated state, he still had steady hands and a drive to do for Kyo what was needed.

Kyo didn't wake up when Die came in but when a naked body straddled his semi-nude one, he woke up and flailed a little before settling down again, peering up at his lover as his IV was attached. He huffed as the needle pierced his skin, grumbling something about being glad when all of this was over. "Coulda waited til morning, baby...how plastered are you?"

Die finished up with the IV and then peered down at Kyo, a smirk on his face. "Mmm... completely fucking wasted. But trust me, I'm not going to fuck this up and I'm certainly not going to puke on you." He licked his lips a little and then slid off Kyo, flopping to the side. "All done, fluid started."

Kyo snorted softly and looked at Die, blinking his eyes a couple of times. "Coulda waited til mornin' or at least until you were dressed." He shifted his hips up, grunting as his half-hard length brushed against the bed sheets.

Die eyeballed Kyo from where he'd landed and then huffed out a soft breath. "Stop bitchin', you got your loverboy rubbin all over you drunk to put an IV in. Hell of a lot better than some grumpy ass nurse."

Kyo reached over and thumped Die's arm before shifting onto his side. "Dont' get sassy with me just because you're drunk, Daisuke."

"I only speak the truth.. Tooru." He stuck his tongue out at the other and then rolled over onto his back, spread-eagle on the bed. "Did you get my texts?"

Kyo sniffed at the sound of his name, rolling his eyes. "Yes, I did. I was rather amused and somewhat glad I wasn't there to caught in those pics."

Die chuckled. "Motokatsu is friggin open as hell about himself. No shame at all in that boy." He rolled over again and grunted faintly, his cheek pressed into the material of the pillow. "And by the way, I tripped and that's how I ended up there. We joked and all that."

Kyo laughed a little then nodded. "I wondered how that came about, but figured you were all goofing around." He reached over to scratch at the IV then settled again, closing his eyes and yawning.

Die reached over and wacked Kyo's wandering hand away from the IV tube. "Stop it." He sat up on his knees and sniffed, looking around, and for a moment, looking more like an adorable animal than anything else.

Kyo grumped in Die's general direction then looked up at him, a smile working its way onto his lips. "C'mere..." He reached up and tugged Die down, kissing him softly on the lips. "You're too fucking cute sometimes, you know that?"

Die gasped softly when Kyo yanked him down, landing with his arms on either side of his lover, his eyes wide. Once the kiss was done, he chuckled. "Thank you." He poked Kyo's nose and then half flopped on him. "My _adorable_ lover, baby, darling."

Kyo looked at Die as if he'd grown two heads then laughed, stroking his fingers through his hair. "Adorable? I think that's worse than cute..." He rested his hand atop Die's head and closed his eyes again, not exactly ready to be awake.

"Mmm... and I'm allowed to say it. No one else. Just meee~" Die yawned cutely and then closed his eyes, smacking his lips. "Imma sleep right here."

Kyo stared down at Die and let out a laugh before situating his arm on the side of the bed then dragging part of the cover over Die and himself. "Fine, g'night, baby."

It didn't even take but a few moments before Die drifted off, snoring lightly from both the position and complete exhaustion.

Kyo watched Die sleep for a few minutes then he, too, slipped off, his hand still tangled in Die's hair.


	44. Chapter 44

After the concert at Shibuya Public Hall, Kyo had focused on getting himself well. He allowed Die to play nursemaid and baby him until he couldn't stand lying in bed anymore and started doing vocal exercises in their music room at home as well as working on his photography. 

Finally, nine days later, he was feeling back normal and he decided to take care of an ache that had been building for far too long. Die was still at the studio and for the time being, that suited Kyo just fine, or so he thought. 

After pulling out a slender silver vibrator and lube and setting them on the nightstand, he brought up one of the porn videos he had on his computer and pressed play. Soon, a guy appeared on the screen, slowly jacking off with a sounding rod and Kyo let out a soft groan as his dick began to harden. 

Partway into the video, Kyo grabbed vibe and turned it on, reaching down to slide it over his now hard cock. He groaned and shuddered as pleasure shot through him and soon the video was forgotten as he focused on running the toy up and down his length then over his sac. It wasn't quite enough for him though so he grabbed the lube and squirted some on the tip of the toy before dipping his hand between his legs, carefully pushing the vibe into his body. "Ah, shit...yeah.." He groaned and flicked the vibe on then started slowly fucking himself with it, his free hand going to stroke his dick.

After some time of doing this, he flopped back on the bed and stared down at his dick, a frustrated look on his face. He had not managed to cum nor was he even fully hard anymore. He growled and pulled the vibe out, flicking it off and tossing it down on the floor. It wasn't enough. He needed Die and Die was being overly cautious at this point. "Ugh!" He huffed out a breath and reached over to slam his laptop shut, kicking the bed sheets in a petulant manner.

Die had, truthfully, been avoiding touching Kyo for a while now. He wanted him to get completely well and by his definition, exhausting him by fucking around was not the way to go. He'd seen how much even blowing his lover had exerted him and he didn't want to keep going down that path. And to top it all off, Die had decided that if Kyo couldn't get satisfaction, he wouldn't allow himself any either. So no matter how hard he got, he just refused to jack off. 

Die came home from getting groceries, putting them all away, and then headed upstairs in search of Kyo. He arrived at the open bedroom door in just enough time to see Kyo toss a vibrator to the floor and then slam his laptop shut. Leaning against the doorjamb, he crossed his arms, and then chuckled. "I guess I get to catch you at long last, hmm?"

Kyo jerked a sheet over his lap and stared at Die when he spoke. He made a face and gestured to his uncooperative dick and huffed. "Not like it matters, there wasn't a lot going on." He crossed his arms and looked back to Die, a rare pout on his face. "I couldn't stop thinking of you fucking me and how much better it would be than that vibe and my body just shut down."

Die pursed his lips a little bit and then made little puffy cheeks. After a moment, he came to sit down on the bed next to Kyo and reached out to pat his leg. "I know... I want you so bad it hurts at times... like seriously hurts. Agony. In my dick." He let out a soft laugh and then shrugged. "But all agony is worth it to make sure you get back to tip-top health."

Kyo reached out to grab Die's hand, somewhat roughly putting it on his dick. "Damn my health, Daisuke, just fuck me," he exclaimed in an exasperated tone. "I'm fine, anyway. I took the last of my antibiotics two days ago."

Die gasped, none-too-softly, shivering a little bit and then groaning. It took him almost no time at all before he was scrambling onto the bed, ripping his shirt off over his head, and then quickly starting to unbuckle his pants. Leaning in, he caught his lips and started kissing him in an almost desperate sort of fashion.

Kyo groaned into the kiss, his hands pushing into Die's hair, pulling a bit harshly as he kicked the covers off of his body. "Die, please...," he murmured against his lover's lips, desperation in every word.

Die barely fumbled his pants open and then tugged Kyo up, knowing what he'd been doing with the vibrator and knowing what that meant for him. With a quick thrust, he was inside, a loud moan floating free of his mouth as he penetrated the other.

A harsh cry left his lips as Die entered his body, his legs immediately coming up to wrap around Die's waist. "Gods, yes!" He was soon dragging his nails down Die's back as pleasure coursed through him.

Die let out another moan and then shuddered, quick to start thrusting almost violently into his lover, unable to even remotely hold back what he had so desperately been wanting.

Kyo held on for the ride, his body thrumming with intense desire. "Die!" His cock was rock hard between them and a subtle shift of his hips had it rubbing against Die's stomach with each thrust. "Fuck!"

Sliding down over Kyo, hunching close, he curled his arms around the other and thrust even harder, the look on his face and the tension in his body clearly radiating his desires and just how long he'd been holding them back. "Baby... shit... I'm gonna... I can't... oh gods," he hissed out, burying his face against Kyo's neck as his rhythm completely fell apart, a sure precursor to his impending orgasm.

Kyo gasped out a breath then beat Die to it, his hips snapping up as he started to cum almost without warning, his body contorting underneath Die's. "A-ah yes!," he cried out against Die's neck as spurt after spurt of cum shot onto his stomach, his body trembling with the effort of it.

"Oh holy fucking shit!" Die shoved so hard into Kyo that he honestly thought he might go blind from the sheer pleasure of it. His hips jerked and his body trembled, his breath catching in his throat as he finally lost it, cumming harder than he could remember in a long, long time.

Kyo's eyes rolled into the back of his head as Die slammed into him, ramming right over his prostate and pushing him into another orgasm directly after the first. His mouth opened in a silent scream as more cum spurted from his cock.

Die let out a cry as Kyo's entire passage clamped down around him. Bowing his head, he stilled. After a few moments, he let out a strangled sob and then gasped in much-needed air. "Oh my fuck."

Kyo practically melted into the body, shivers going through him as he fought to regulate he breathing. "Fuck..indeed."

Die leaned in to lightly kiss Kyo and then simply collapsed there, still inside his lover, refusing to leave him just yet.

Kyo kissed Die back almost weakly then just wrapped his arms around him, breathing too heavily still. "Gods..."

Die took his time, resting there for a long time before he finally decided where he was going with this. Leaning down, he caught Kyo's lips with his own, initiating the sweetest of kisses, his tongue dancing along the other's lower lip and then pressing just within the seam.

Kyo hummed softly as Die's lips met his own in a tender kiss, his hand coming up to trail through his lover's red hair as he gradually parted his lips for him.

Die shivered a little bit as he slowly and completely claimed the inside of Kyo's mouth. Once he felt he'd earned his rights within the other's warm cavern, he slowly began to move his hips, thrusting his still-hardened length achingly slowly in and out of the other's body.

By the end of the kiss, Kyo found himself somewhat breathless. He slid his hand over Die's narrow shoulder, digging his nails lightly into the skin there as he curled his tongue around the one invading his mouth. Die began to move, pulling a quiet moan from him as his nerve endings lit up with pleasure once again.

Die shifted slightly, pulling back from the kiss enough to trail his lip, feather-light, down Kyo's chin and across his jaw, then down to his neck. He breathed hot across the skin there, licking his lips a little bit and then nipping lightly. "I fucking love you... don't you dare scare me again like you did, you bastard."

Kyo groaned, bring his other hand up to splay both on Die's back, his hips rolling upward. He let out a sigh, closing his eyes as he tilted his head back, allowing Die to do as he pleased. "Hnn, I'm sorry, my Koi. I love you, too...so very much."

Die leaned up again, crushing his mouth to Kyo's own just as he finished speaking. His kiss was in sharp contrast to his thrusts... the thrusts slow and simple, the kiss hard and almost violent.

Kyo whimpered into the kiss, wrapping his arms tighter around Die. A moment later, he brought his legs up to slide around his lover's waist, pulling him as close as possible.

When Die finally pulled back from the kiss, he just let out a soft groan and simply stared down into the other's face as he thrust ever so slowly, his hips circling round-and-round. "I love you, baby... I love you so very much."

The vocalist stared up at his lover, his eyes a little too bright. He let out a faint moan, moving one hand to stroke over Die's face as he pushed his own hips up. "My precious Daisuke..."

Die leaned into the touch, enjoying the hand being against his cheek like this. It felt so good to have him close in such a manner. With a quiet moan, he turned his head to press a kiss to the other's palm, his eyelids fluttering closed.

Kyo shifted slightly beneath Die, shivering as his cock brushed against his lover's stomach. He loved the heat that was slowly building between them, a slow gentle climb to their bliss. He pushed his fingers in Die's hair, tugging his head down for another kiss, taking control this time and gently pushing his tongue into his lover's mouth with a soft groan.

Die quietly allowed the other all the access he was so obviously craving, not at all pushing it any further than they already had it. Just a gentle bit of lovin' with all the tenderness and affection and none of the rush.

Kyo took his time with the kiss and when he pulled away, his suckled Die's bottom lip for a moment before tilting his head up to press his lips to Die's neck, pulling the skin between his teeth, marking it lightly. After a few moments, he dropped back to the pillow and looked up at Die, pushing his hair from his face. "Have I ever told you that you are the most gorgeous creature in the universe, Koi?"

Die groaned the instant Kyo's lips touched his neck. Rarely did the other venture there and when he did, it was always like sparks were flying through his every nerve ending. "O-oh!" he cried out softly, his hips jerking forward once before he settled.

As the other complimented him, he shivered slightly, and then closed his eyes, a tiny smile on his lips.

Kyo's lips curved into a smile of his own, loving the way Die reacted to certain touches. Unable to help himself, he leaned in and nuzzled the other side of Die's neck, licking and nipping the skin, tracing his jugular with his tongue.

Die's breath caught and he reached out, grasping the back of Kyo's neck, holding him in place. "Ah... ah," he found himself groaning like he was about to cum from the licking and sucking of the skin of his neck. "Oh fuck," he gasped out in between startled breaths. "Please.... oh please."

Kyo groaned as Die held him place, one arm shifting to help support himself as he leaned up further. His mouth worked over Die's neck, teeth scraping along his jawline then tongue flicking over the spot just behind his ear before moving to swipe over his lover's gorgeous Adam's apple. "Die...," he breathed out against the other's skin, breath blowing over the area his tongue just moistened.

Despite his best efforts, Die knew if Kyo kept doing this, he'd be done for... and quickly at that. It had been one of his best-kept secrets until now, Kyo not really choosing to explore it in such a manner except for fleeting moments in time while Die contained his reactions. But he felt like a virgin with how easily triggered he was by this, his reactions desperate and swift. His hips moved steadily, his rhythm still achingly slow, but his cock throbbed like he was pounding into the other furiously, completely on edge.

Kyo eventually pulled back, a little smirk on his face as his tongue swiped over his bottom lip. The feeling of Die throbbing within him told him all he needed to know about what his previous actions had done and he made a note to provide that area with more attention. 

With his lips still quirked up, he brought his knees up and used a quick maneuver to flip them so that he was on top, his hips pushing down on Die's cock once more, a soft moan escaping him. 

He leaned down over Die, rocking his hips steadily but keeping the same pace as he once again buried his face against his lover's neck, paying attention to the opposite side now.

Die let out a sound at being flipped over, though he honestly could find no complaint in Kyo's display of power. Excitement lit his eyes as he lay back, reaching up to bury both hands in Kyo's hair. "Fuck, baby..." he whispered quietly. "Yes...." He shivered and then arched upward, letting Kyo ride him to his heart's content. "God, please!"

Kyo smirked, taking his time, scraping his teeth over one spot then moving to suck at another, leaving red and slightly purple marks on Die's neck. He didn't care though and finally moved to the juncture of Die's neck and shoulder, biting the skin a little roughly as he pushed his hips down particularly hard.

Die's cries increased greatly and after a while, he completely lost it, his hips jerking up and his eyes rolling back as he started to cum, spurting hard into the other's body. "F-fuck!" he cried out.

Kyo didn't relent until Die started cumming, causing his breath to hitch in his throat. He sat up, rocking his hips harder for a moment as Die filled him, groaning at the feeling. "Ah, yes, baby...that's it, fill me up."

Panting, Die ran his hands through Kyo's hair and then whimpered softly, slowly sinking down onto the bed and closing his eyes. "Oh my god..." he let out a soft laugh, "I owe you... big time."

Kyo smirked a bit, easing off of Die's cock, moving to lay back on the bed beside him. He took perverse pleasure in the feeling of his lover's cum seeping from his body and soon his hand was trailing over his own hardened length. "Hnn, you can repay me now by using that gorgeous mouth of your's..." He turned and looked at Die, smiling.

Die let out a soft laugh. "Yeah, I was actually going to offer that," he murmured. Pushing himself up, still slightly shaky, he shifted to run his hand over Kyo's stomach. Leaning in, he licked over his abdomen, trailing his tongue down from his belly button to just above his pubes.

Kyo chuckled then let out a soft sigh, settling down on the bed some more before reaching down and pushing his fingers through Die's hair again. "I can't get enough of your hair, baby. The red looks so good sliding through my fingers."

Die peered up at him and then smiled softly. "Mmm... I'll remember that." With a grin, he bowed his head and then took nearly all of his lover into his mouth in one single movement, starting to bob his head ever so slowly.

Kyo smirked. "Good." He was going to say something else but then Die's mouth had him letting out a loud moan, his eyes rolling in the back of his head as his lover's mouth engulfed him. "O-oh Gods! Yes!"

Sliding his hand up, Die raked his fingers back down, just pressing the fingers to make the skin red, though he wasn't using his nails. He moaned as he started to bob his head faster, really going to town on the other's cock, slurping a bit loudly.

Kyo shuddered, his hips pushing up slightly as Die sucked him. He was already on edge from their previous activities and he found himself very close to losing it already, despite wanting to draw out his own pleasure just a bit longer. "Fuck, baby..."

Die moaned softly and then pulled up, flicking his tongue over the head of his cock. A moment later, he plunged down over the other's length once more.

With Die's next move, Kyo lost it, a cry coming from him as his hips snapped up, pushing his length completely into Die's mouth as he came. He shuddered from the pleasure of it and when he finished filling Die's mouth with his offering, he pulled back, letting the last little bit smear across his lover's lips.

Die let out a soft snort around Kyo's cock and sucked greedily as the other came in his mouth. Swallowing thickly, he pulled back and then opened his mouth, showing the remaining cum to the other, cupped in the dip of his tongue.

Kyo stared down at Die, groaning softly before crooking his finger at him. "C'mere, Daisuke..."

Shifting forward, Die sealed his lips with Kyo's own and slowly pushed his tongue into his mouth with a moan, sharing his cum with him.

Kyo moaned against Die's lips, loving the taste of his own cum in Die's mouth. He pushed both hands into Die's hair, kissing him for a moment before pulling back, licking a strand of cum and saliva from his lips. "Gods, you're amazing."

Die pulled away once Kyo was done kissing him, licking his lips and then smirking softly at him. "Well... now you know all my secrets." He winked and then rolled over onto his back with a soft sigh.

Kyo chuckled, rolling to his side and sliding his arm across Die's waist. "Mm, I doubt that but I do have one more weapon in my arsenal."

"Oh yeah?" he asked softly, arching one eyebrow. "And what might that be?"

Kyo smirked, tilting his head up to flick his tongue over Die's neck. "I can always mess with your neck if I want you riled up in a hurry."

Die shuddered slightly and then playfully batted Kyo away. "So you can." He caught his tongue between his teeth and then huffed out a soft sigh, closing his eyes.

Kyo laughed then settled down, leaning up to press a soft kiss to Die's cheek before resting his head on his shoulder, his hand tracing idle patterns over his stomach. "Mm..I love you."

"I love you, too, my sweet, darling, adorable, baby." He reached to gently tap Kyo's nose. "I'd dare call you... cute."

Kyo raised an eyebrow and gave a little growl, finding and tweaking the teensy amount of extra skin on Die's stomach. "Oi...not cute. Save that for the kittens!"

Die laughed softly and tilted his head back. "Mmm... you're adorable, period." He poked his tongue out from between his lips and then cackled. "Cute! My cute adorable sweetpea!"

Kyo stared at Die with a slight look of horror on his face before reaching down and plucking a single pubic hair. "Sweetpea? That's the cat's name!" He huffed a bit, his nose wrinkled up.

Die yelped and then rolled off the bed. "Oh my god! Ouch, you prick!" He puffed out his lips and then rubbed absently at his now pained lower half.

Kyo raised an eyebrow and sat up, snickering a little. "Drama queen." He rolled off the bed and moved over to his lover, bending down and pressing his lips to the area. "There, happy?"

Die pursed his lips and then sighed softly. "Mmm... sure." He reached and ruffled Kyo's hair. "Don't pull my fuckin' pubes out, man."

Kyo righted himself and smirked. "Then don't call me cute." He reached around and groped Die's ass before turning and heading for their bathroom, his hips swaying a bit.

"Hey, I thought I was the only one allowed." Die watched him go and then leaned back against the side of the bed, closing his eyes with a soft sigh.

Kyo just laughed, going to turn the shower on, getting the water warmed up. After a moment, he poked his head back out, a soft smile on his face. "You are the only one, love."

Die pursed his lips a little bit and then shook his head a bit. "Mmm... that's what I thought." He pushed himself up, hearing the shower running in the other room. "Shower time?"

Kyo smiled and nodded, disappearing back into the bathroom. He took care of the essentials before Die joined him, wanting to get that out of the way. "Better hurry, koi, the water'll get cold."

Die padded into the bathroom and moved to take an allergy pill before coming to the shower and slipping inside.

Kyo frowned a little as he watched Die take the pill, reaching up to lightly tap Die's nose. "Still bothering you, baby? Are you sure it's just allergies?"

Die peered over at the other man and then made a little sound. "Mmm... I think it is. It's always bad this time of the year." He licked his lips a little bit.

Kyo nodded then moved to slip his arms around Die's waist, pressing a light kiss to his lips. "My poor snuffly Dai."

"Mmm... yes... poor me... getting kisses from my loving and wonderful darling." He chuckled softly and then patted Kyo's behind.

Kyo grinned then gently pushed Die under the stream of the shower before get some shower gel and pouring a good amount into his hand. He set the bottle aside then started massaging and working the gel into Die's skin, washing him with his fingertips.

Die gave Kyo a curious little look and then chuckled. "Mmm... I see... you just wanted to touch me some more, didn't you?" He put on his best cocky look, though it obviously didn't meet his eyes.

Kyo looked up at Die then smirked. "Oh yes, Die, I can't live without touching you every five minutes! Didn't you know that?" He slid his hand downward, soaping up Die's pubes then started running his hands over his dick, cleaning that particularly well.

Die pretended to preen, primping his hair gently and then grinned. "Mmm... but you clean me so well, baby," he issued cheesily.

Kyo chuckled, dipping his hand down and rolling Die's sac then slid his fingers over his taint before pulling his hand back up. "Mm turn around so I can wash your back.."

Die turned around and leaned his hands on the wall, yawning a little and humming. "I adore you."

Kyo smiled softly as he got more shower gel, applying it to the sponge this time before he started lightly washing Die's back. "Hmm, I know." He laughed then dipped the sponge down between Die's butt cheeks, tending to matters there before tossing it down to be rinsed later. "Want me to wash your hair?"

Die shook his head a little bit. "Nah, been trying to do an every other day thing with the hair like my bother's been on me about." He chuckled.

Kyo kinda rolled his eyes but smiled, running his hands over Die's shoulders to help get the soap off. "Okay then, you can be greasy headed." He tweaked Die's butt lightly then shifted around, rinsing his hands and arms off.

"Shush..." he laughed quietly. "I don't turn into a greaseball that easy." He gasped when Kyo goosed him, blushing faintly as he finished rinsing off.

Kyo moved so that he was standing in front of Die, his hands resting on his lover's hips. "I know, I'm just teasing you." He stood on tiptoe and pressed his lips to Die's, kissing him for a moment before pulling back and stepping out of the shower. He grabbed a towel and started drying off, taking his time.

Die chuckled, lightly kissing Kyo back and then swallowing as he reached to turn off the water. Getting out, he grabbed his towel and then headed right back for the bedroom. "I'm getting old, Kyo... I'm tired."

Kyo looked at his lover, snorting softly. "Where's all of that virility gone to?" He finished drying up then glanced towards the door, smirking the slightest bit. "Gotta piss," he announced a little loudly, moving towards the toilet slower than necessary, watching out of the corner of his eye.

"Right to my dick for fucking you," Die quipped softly as he headed to the hallway. Kyo's comment hit him and he could feel his nerve endings electrify, pleasure cascading through him. But no... he was no doing to do this. Not tonight and not while his lover was still sick. And really, he'd been trying to tone himself down a bit lately. Without missing a step, he continued on the way to the bedroom. "Well hurry! I want my Kyo-heater in bed!"

Kyo paused and raised an eyebrow. Dies' reaction struck him as odd and he actually found himself a little disappointed. He'd been looking forward the intense look of desire that settled itself on his lover's face when they indulged in this particular fetish. 

Huffing slightly, he simply turned around and followed Die to the bedroom, though he stopped at the door and leaned against it. "That's it?"

Die leaned over the bed and pulled the covers down. He'd just turned off the bedside lamp when Kyo spoke up, startling him into jumping slightly. "Fuck, scared the hell out of me." He laughed softly and then turned around, tilting his head. "What do you mean, that's it?"

Kyo sniffed a bit and crossed his arms. "You don't even want to watch? Not even the tiniest bit of interest?" He gave Die an odd look. "You haven't shown interest in it in quite some time, actually. Did something happen that you're not telling me about?"

Anxiety welled up in Die's chest and he swallowed thickly the very moment that Kyo started to talk. He'd been half expecting this talk for a long while, but that didn't make it any easier for him to actually manage. With a soft sigh, he reached to hold the edge of the dresser. "Um..." closing his eyes for a moment, he shook his head a little bit. "Fine, you caught me. I've been trying to lay off it while you're sick. I've sort of ramped back all of it."

Kyo gave Die the same look he gave him when he thought he was being ridiculous about something, which he was, in his opinion. He sighed softly and moved to perch his nude rear on the edge of the bed and frowned at Die. "Die, I'm not sick anymore...otherwise I wouldn't have just managed that amazing sex we just had."

Die's fingers curled around the edge of the nightstand and he reached with his other hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. Huffing out a soft sigh, he just gave up and quietly admitted, "I want more than to watch you and I don't want to ask that of you right now. I feel like... all we ever do is focus on me and my sexual deviancy. I just feel like sometimes we should focus on you instead."

Kyo shifted on the bed a bit then sighed, casting his eyes down to the ground. "Baby, the only reason I even announced it was because I wanted to involve you in it. I _enjoy_ seeing you get worked up over things. My desires are..." He paused and bit his lip, thinking for a moment. "Well, they're harder for you to handle than yours are for me to handle. I know it greatly disturbs you to spill my blood or to utterly dominate me. So, because of that, I just indulge in your pleasure instead."

Die turned a horribly sad look on his lover. "I think... we need to have a completely honest talk." He sighed and took his towel off, pulling on a pair of clean boxer briefs and then settling down next to Kyo, taking his hand. "Nothing held back and just... frank honesty, okay?"

Kyo almost winced at the look on Die's face, his heart dropping some. He hated, _hated_ it when he felt like he'd upset Die and right now, he did. He just nodded, shifting back to pull the covers over his nude form for now, lacing his fingers with Die's. "Okay."

Die took a deep breath and then squeezed his hand tightly. "I love you with my all, sweetheart. Please remember that before I say a thing, okay?"

Kyo glanced up at Die then nodded though his forehead was creased. A feeling of worry settled over him and he found himself clenching his jaw already.

"I find it very difficult to hurt you. I like giving you pleasure and watching you cum for me. But I honestly can't get pleasure out of harming you in certain ways. However," he held up a finger, indicating he was nowhere near done, "I want to point out that I do like tying you up... harming you in less permanent ways _can_ work for me, too. Spanking, flogging, the paper-thin cuts... pretending to choke you." He closed his eyes for a moment and then squeezed his lover's fingers. But actually choking you or cutting you really deeply... it hurts me more than it actually hurts you in the end."

Kyo listened as Die spoke, his lip pulled between his teeth. He sighed softly, realizing that he was, perhaps, taking some things for granted. A sad look flashed in his eyes as Die mentioned how much those things hurt him and he just squeezed his hand tightly, feeling a bit like an ass. "You're...you're right. I'm sorry for putting you through that. It's...selfish of me."

Die shook his head. "No. It's not. It's what you want and you have every single right in the world to want it." He reached to run his hand lightly over Kyo's cheek. "I want you to know that some parts of it, I delight in... but I don't do them because I'm half afraid you'll want more than I can give you right in that moment. Sometimes, I can do everything... but sometimes I'm just too fragile. So I think we need some sort of sign for me to let you know how much I can do... or am willing to do, each time." He put his hand down on his lap. "As for my own stuff... I don't feel it right to indulge more often in it than we indulge in yours. I feel like a total prick."

Kyo sighed again then leaned over, resting his head against Die's shoulder. "I don't know, love. It loses something when I know that you're uncomfortable...whereas I am perfectly comfortable with yours." He shifted to look up at Die. "I don't want to break you."

Die made a little face and then reached to take Kyo's jaw in his hand, lifting his head up. "Baby... listen to me. There's parts of it I _love_ doing. Like genuinely love." He leaned in and kissed him hard. "I like thinking you're helpless to what I want. I adore tanning your ass-end until you can't even _think_ of sitting. There's things in the domination realm that make me want you so bad it fucking hurts in a damn good way. Don't you dare ever think that I don't like any of it."

Kyo couldn't help but groan a little at the kiss before he made a face of his own. Die's words sent shivers down his back, despite the tone of the conversation but he just ignored them in favor of reaching up to cup Die's cheek. "I think I get it." He smiled a little crookedly, running his thumb over his lover's jaw. "I also think that...I either over-think or under-think things sometimes and make it very awkward." He let out a wry laugh, shaking his head as he sat up properly. "Forgive me?"

Die let go of Kyo's chin and then cleared his throat. "There is nothing to forgive. But what do you mean by over-think or under-think?"

Kyo shifted, crossing his legs before looking back at Die. "I mean I assume too much and don't give enough thought to your feelings on the matter before I go opening my mouth."

"More the opposite, perhaps." He reached to run his hand through Kyo's hair and then let his hand fall once again. "I need you to talk to me, baby... I can't just open up like this and not get something in return or I'll feel like a jerk."

Kyo reached out to once again link their fingers, a thoughtful frown on his face. "I know and I'm trying. I don't want you to worry or be upset. I'd rather just deal." He sighed softly then continued. "When we're toying with the more unconventional side of things, sometimes I think of asking for something but then I'm just afraid it'll be too much or too weird for you. So, in the interest of not ruining the mood, I don't say anything."

"Listen to me on this and I mean it... I'll always consider your requests. And I promise you if I have a raging boner... killing it is harder than you think." He chuckled softly.

Kyo let out a light laugh then nodded. "Okay, fine. I'll remember that next time I want you to wear a clown wig to bed." He looked at Die, attempting to keep a straight face but the corners of his lips were twitching far too much.

Die reached over and soundly delivered a smack to the back of Kyo's head. "Dork." With a smirk, he looked away and shook his head. "Okay, so... sometimes I think we get too stuck in our own heads. I mean... it's a part of both of us and it's not good when we don't communicate completely. So I suggest we remember from now on that we can't read minds and try to be a bit more open."

Kyo winced, reaching back to rub his head. "Bitch." He laughed then sobered up, sighing before leaning over to kiss Die's cheek. "I agree."

Die chuckled softly and then licked his lips, tilting his head back a little. "Okay... do we suck less now? Is it maybe a bit clearer where I'm coming from?"

Kyo nodded, scooting off the bed to stand up. "I think so. I'm still sorry I made things all weird tonight...but I guess we needed it." He smiled a little then pointed towards the door. "Now, I _really_ gotta piss so, uhm...I'm going to go do that." He turned and headed for the bathroom, truly feeling a bit desperate at this point.

Die swallowed a little and then pushed himself up off the bed as well, trailing after Kyo. His lover had made it clear that he'd wanted to share this with him and he'd be damned if he were enough of an asshole to deny it after that conversation they'd just had. Coming into the bathroom behind him, he curled his arm around Kyo' stomach and rested his chin on his shoulder, nuzzling his nose lightly against his neck.

Kyo smiled when he heard Die following him. He flipped the toilet seat up and reached down to grasp himself, aiming for the bowl while he leaned into Die. He started going, letting out a sigh of relief as his bladder began emptying itself rather noisily. "Ahh...I really did have to go."

Die just made a little sound into Kyo's neck, pressing his lips there and then, finally, looking down to watch what Kyo was doing, that usual surge of lust boiling up inside him. It was honestly the first time he'd indulged in a while, not having been watching porn, fantasizing about it, or actually even doing anything out of the ordinary on purpose himself.

Kyo pissed for what seemed like forever before the stream began tapering off. He moved his free hand to rest on top of Die's, sliding them both down to his lower abdomen and pressing. He grunted and pushed the last little bit out in a couple of hard spurts then stood there, letting his cock drip for a moment.

Die licked his lips a little bit and then pursed his lips slightly. "Mmm..." he couldn't think of anything else to say, simply kissing his neck once more and then patting his belly lightly. "Love you."

Kyo shook off then reached forward to flush the toilet before turning to kiss Die on the lips, smiling up at him. "Mm, love you too." He shifted away to go rinse his hands then looked at Die again. "Bedtime, baby?"

Die pulled back and then made his way to the door to wait on Kyo. "Yeah... I really am tired. That part was seriously not a lie."

Kyo nodded and headed for their bedroom. Once there, he pulled on a pair of boxers and a tshirt before climbing into bed, settling almost in the middle, giving Die no choice but to snuggle with him.

Die went to the dresser and removed a tank top. But a moment later, he debated it, and then put the shirt aside, sliding into bed and finally pulling the covers up as he pretty much curled himself around Kyo's body.

Kyo smiled then curled into Die's embrace, wrapping his arm around his waist, rubbing the slightly hollow dip there. He tilted his head up and caught Die's lips in a soft kiss. "Mmm, I think we both need a few nights of junk food and take out."

Die let out a quiet chuckle. "Mmm... yeah... we do. I vote on some pork fried rice and miso soup and... bbq pork. Oh lord I'm hungry, what is this?" He laughed softly.

Kyo chuckled and shook his head, stroking over Die's hip. "Mm, I was thinking more along the lines of some McD's french fries and chocolate shake."

Die smirked. "How about... we take ourselves a day and get random crap food. Just one day of whatever the fuck we want."

Kyo grinned. "That sounds good to me! We could even hit up Costco and stock up on sugary cereal and potato chips."

"Whatever you want, baby," Die returned, his voice slowly fading off, indicating he was falling asleep despite best efforts to keep talking.

Kyo chuckled softly then quieted down, watching Die as his face slowly relaxed. He smiled and leaned up, pressing his lips to Die's cheek then got comfortable again, yawning and finally falling asleep himself shortly after.


	45. Chapter 45

It had been nearly four days since Die and Kyo had finally fucked. And, frankly, Die was growing impatient for more alone time with his lover. He was planning something for Kyo soon enough, but tonight... he just wanted a taste of what he'd been craving for weeks now.

They'd been doing housework, something that had been sorely lacking as of late, and Kyo was still downstairs, vacuuming while Die had been upstairs, cleaning the entire bathroom. Tossing the sponge in the sink, Die washed his hands off and then headed down the stairs, pausing mid-way down to squirm slightly, a devious look on his face. Perhaps... he'd show Kyo a different side tonight.

Kyo was finally feeling normal again and able to attend to some much needed housework. He and Die had split up the duties with Die doing the bathrooms and Kyo doing the vacuuming. 

He was still vacuuming their living room carpet, his headphones in his ears to drown out the monotonous drone of the vacuum cleaner. As he moved the machine over the carpet, he danced a little to the songs currently being fed into his ears.

Die glanced around the room and then debated what cleaning supplies they had in the house. Maybe... he'd go a bit further than was necessary today. After all, it gave him a thrill to do terrible things.

Stepping off the stairs, he skirted around behind Kyo and slid into the kitchen area. Okay... so he had opted to take mopping duty... he could make a mess first. Smirking, he stepped into the kitchen and onto the tiles. Unbuckling his pants and then unzipping them, he pushed his hand inside and cupped himself, allowing himself a whimper as he sort of hunched over.

Kyo didn't notice his lover creeping around as he finally finished up the carpet. Turning the vacuum off, he moved to unplug it and stow it in the hall closet. Once he'd done that, he turned off his iPod and removed his headphones, settling them on the coffee table for the moment. 

He dusted his hands off and headed for the kitchen, intent on getting both him and Die a drink.

Die grew more and more impatient with how Kyo didn't even look up from his work. By the time Kyo was putting the stupid vacuum cleaner away in the closet, Die had already decided he was going to just be a terrible, terrible person and piss in as many places as he could find. 

Pulling his cock free of his pants, he moved to the little potted tree in the corner - something he'd been dying to water for nearly a month now - and let free enough to wet the soil around the base of it, intentionally dribbling some on the floor in front of the pot as a sign of what he'd done. 

Chewing his lip, he moved to the table and reached across to fiddle with how he napkin holder was set up, letting free a spurt across the chair, a thrill running through his body as he did it. Yes... devious... dirty... Kyo was going to kill him. And hell if he cared right then. He wanted to water the whole house, room by room, until he was done. And by god, he hadn't gone all day, so he had _so_ much to offer.

With a grunt, he moved to the wall and pressed himself there, hands sliding up the wall as he pressed his cock to the coolness of the paint, leaning in enough that when he pissed, it went down the wall and splashed over his pants as well. He left a little puddle on the floor there and then dashed to the sink, opening the cabinet and pulling out the trash bin, holding it as he let out a squirt there as well, the sound of it on the plastic liner making him moan lowly. Kyo... was going to shit a brick.

Kyo was humming when he walked into the kitchen but abruptly silenced himself upon seeing the scene playing out in front of him. His jaw dropped slightly as he watched Die dart from pissing on the wall to pissing in their trash bin. 

After a moment, he found his voice again, none too pleased with the mess Die was making since they'd just spent all day cleaning. "Daisuke! What. The. Fuck?! Is this what you've been doing while I've been in there vacuuming?!"

Die grinned to himself, putting the trash bin back and then licking his lips. "I cleaned the bathroom... it's sparkling clean, I assure you." His eyes flicked up to meet Kyo's, gleaming with pleasure. Reaching out, he grabbed Kyo's shirt and hauled him close. "C'mon... I need this... I can't ask for it, but... please," he breathed out against Kyo's ear.

Kyo just stared at Die incredulously then huffed out a breath, pushing Die away, his expression dark. "Where all did you piss? Show me and you better not fucking leave out a place. If I find it later, I'll spank your ass raw."

Defeat slid through Die like a raw knife. Fine... so Kyo wasn't going to be okay with his little games. Something like shame slid through him and he swallowed thickly. He'd deal... like a fuckin' man. That's just how things worked. He pulled out the trashcan and set it down, doing up his pants with one hand as he grabbed a few wads of paper towels and the bleach spray. He went to dump the towels in each place and then started back in with the bleach and the new paper towels on the wall, the floor, and then the chair. He cleaned up in front of the planter and sprayed some bleach into the soil of the fake tree, knowing that was likely the one that was going to piss Kyo off the most.

Throwing it all away, he tied up the bag and then brushed past Kyo to go and take the trash outside. Out front, he loaded it all into the big bin and then stood there for a moment, completely uncomfortable and... completely turned off. Well. It'd worked to do one thing at least, then. Coming back in, he headed straight upstairs without a word, going straight to the bathroom and closing the door, quickly moving to finish pissing in the toilet... where it belonged. He honestly felt like running away from it all... leaving his terrible idea behind. But he didn't know what to actually go about it. Finishing up, he flushed and washed his hands, coming back out and going back downstairs. He grabbed the mop and floor cleaner and headed for the sink to start in on his next chore like he supposed he should have been doing to start with.

Kyo watched Die, thinking he was going to go through with point out all his naughty spots, but then confusion slid over his face as Die began to actually clean up. His mouth hung open while Die wiped everything off then disappeared outside. Realization hit him and he literally face-palmed, sighing. 

So he'd been a little too harsh right off the bat and now Die was upset. Fuck. Just fuck. He stood there still while Die when back upstairs, but when he returned with the mop, Kyo couldn't stand it anymore and moved over to the sink, reaching out to flip the water off. "Daisuke...what the hell? You're acting like...like a scolded puppy! Which... I guess... I treated you like one. But... I thought..." He paused and crossed his arms over his chest, frowning. "I thought that's where you were taking that."

Die stopped when Kyo turned off the water, staring at the half-full sink. He sighed and reached to turn it back on, adding the two capfuls of cleaner to it and then recapping it, putting it aside. He waited until it was full and then put the mop in, getting it wet and then wringing it out before starting to mop the floor. 

Finally, he answered, quietly, his voice clearly a bit shamed. "I wasn't... I just... it's something I haven't done since I had my own place. It's exciting... completely wrong, but exciting. But I get it that it's gross to everyone else, even though I clean up meticulously."

Kyo blinked a little then hung his head. "I'm sorry. I just... I guess I got the wrong idea." He reached out and took the mop away, leaning it against the counter. "I want you to be 100% comfortable, baby. I know this sort of thing excites you... and I also know that you clean up so well one could eat off the surfaces afterward."

Die stared at the mop, a little annoyed with having started the task and then having it taken away from him. "Okay, well... let's go with... I'm not comfortable with being shamed for it. I do that enough on my own, inside my own head." He sighed, looking down at the floor, discomfort written all over his features. "I just... I dunno. I was thinking maybe you'd join me or something. Like I could tell you where to go and we'd do it together." He tucked some hair behind his ears. "But I wasn't exactly clear on that. It's not your fault you didn't know... and... I get it. I do. And I'm sorry."

Kyo shrunk into himself a little, really feeling like a heel now. He ran his fingers through his hair and gave Die an apologetic look. "Oh...I-I see..." He should have known that he was crossing a line and now, he'd completely ruined Die's plans. "Don't be sorry. It's my fault. I just...jumped the gun." He waved his hand uselessly then slumped against the counter, unsure of what even to say now. After a moment, he gave a sigh and pushed himself upright. "Just gonna go..uhm..away..yeah." And with that, he turned and headed for the stairs.

Die watched Kyo sadly. If only he hadn't had such devious and stupid plans then he wouldn't have made his lover feel bad. But no... he'd wanted more than was acceptable and he'd done stupid things and now Kyo was upset and he just felt like shit. "I love you," he murmured, hoping Kyo would at least hear him as he reached for the mop again and started to work on the floor. Stupid... he was a fucking stupid idiot.

Kyo was about to take the first step when he heard Die's murmured words. They hit him like a hot spear and he stopped, hanging his head. He could hear the tremble in his lover's tone and knew that this had hurt him deeply and now, he didn't know how to fix it but knew he had to. He turned around and went back into the kitchen, ignoring the wet floor in favor and simply wrapping his arms around Die's waist tightly, burying his face against the back of his neck. "I love you, too...and I am so sorry I'm an idiot."

Die paused what he was doing when Kyo came and told him he loved him and that he was an idiot. He kept his head bowed, but he reached up one hand to lay over Kyo's own, trying hard to be perfectly okay with all that had transpired. After all... what could be done with the past?

Kyo sighed softly, holding Die close for a moment then clearing his throat. "For what it's worth...I really have to piss...if you want...."

Die let out a sound that was likely a laugh and then shook his head a little. "It's fine, love..." he didn't really know what else to say about it, but he definitely needed a while before he got past his hang-ups again. "Let's finish the chores and then we can watch a movie or something yeah?"

Kyo pressed his lips together in a frown but nodded. "Yeah, okay then..." He released Die and turned to head up to their bedroom to finish up dusting there.

Once Kyo was gone, Die went about finishing up the mop job on the kitchen. With that done, he scrubbed the counters and the chairs and table within an inch of their lives and wiped off the front of all the appliances, then cleaned the stove. When he was completely done, he headed upstairs with a load of towels from the dryer, going into the bedroom to dump them on the bed. He glanced at Kyo and then ran a hand through his hair. "Can we take a shower?" he asked quietly.

When Die entered the bedroom, Kyo was dusting the same spot he'd been dusting for at least five minutes. He glanced up when Die spoke then nodded, moving to the pile of towels to begin folding them. "Yeah, that'd be nice...after cleaning all day."

"Leave them," Die motioned to the towels. "We'll fold them after the shower." He pulled off his shirt and tossed it into the hamper, the rest of his clothing following, all of his jewelry going in a pile on the dresser.

Kyo just nodded again and dropped the towel he was holding to go strip off his own clothing, adding them to the hamper then wandering towards the bathroom. He glanced towards the toilet briefly then shook his head, leaning into the shower to get the water going so it'd warm up.

Die didn't miss the way Kyo stared at the toilet. With a sigh, he placed his hand on Kyo's back. "Did you still not go?"

Kyo huffed a little and shook his head again. "No, kinda forgot actually..."

Die gently steered his lover to the toilet and lifted the lid, kissing his shoulder. "I forgive you. Stop fretting and tend to your needs."

Kyo sighed and looked at the toilet then to Die before relenting and grasping himself, letting out a soft groan as he finally started to go. He hadn't realized he'd built up so much in the past couple of hours that he'd needed to piss but now it was flowing strong and steady and all he could feel was relief.

Die allowed himself to stay for a moment because he had no idea what else to do. He sighed softly and kissed Kyo's cheek before lightly patting his ass and then moving to get into the shower.

Kyo finished up and made his way into the shower, feeling awkward now. He shifted to lean against the wall, just letting the spray hit his body. "Bathroom looks nice...everything is shiny again..."

"Yeah, I scrubbed everything top to bottom," he murmured softly, reaching to swat Kyo's behind and then hand him a loofah.

Kyo hummed then pursed his lips at the ass swat, turning to take the loofah. "I don't think I put nearly as much effort into the living room." He grabbed some body wash and sudsed up the sponge before reaching out and starting to wash Die's chest, lightly running it over his skin.

"Doesn't matter, it wasn't nearly as dirty. We use it less." He laughed and then looked down at Kyo's hand on his chest, washing him. "Mmm..."

Kyo chuckled softly then moved in closer, slipping his arms around Die and washing his back that way, their bodies close and sliding together. "Mm, true..."

Die simply reached out, running his hand through Kyo's hair lightly, studying him and smiling softly. "Do you forgive me for uh... sullying the kitchen?"

Kyo tilted his head up, pressing his lips to Die's chin. "Of course...Baby, you can sully any part of the house you want as long as it comes clean. Seriously. You could even sully me...because I wash." He slid the sponge downward, stroking over Die's cheeks with it, smirking a bit.

Die flushed slightly and then gave a little nod. He licked his lips a little bit and then tilted his head back, just letting Kyo wash him up. "So what movie do you want to watch?"

Kyo finished up then dropped the sponge, giving a little shrug before standing on his tiptoes, kissing Die's Adam's apple. "Mm, how about something we've seen before?"

"Genre?" Die reached for the other loofah and lathered it up, moving to start washing up Kyo's body as well.

Kyo leaned into Die, closing his eyes. "I don't have a preference, baby. Your pick. In fact, everything for the next few days is your pick..okay?"

Die pursed his lips a little, knowing what Kyo was doing. It was his repayment for what had happened in the kitchen and Die knew better than to argue with it by now. He sniffed a little and then tilted his head slightly as he went about washing him up.

Kyo stretched out his arms for Die to get everywhere then shifted back to rinse off, bending down to pick up his dropped loofah to rinse off.

Die rinsed the loofah he was holding and then started to wash his hair as well.

Kyo went through quickly washing his hair then stood there, watching Die, his hand coming out to trail down his lover's back. "It's almost time to dye it again, isn't it?"

Die rinsed out his hair and then started to put conditioner in it. "Yeah it is. This week. I was planning on doing it Wednesday actually."

Kyo hummed, reaching up to run his fingers through Die's hair, helping distribute the conditioner. "Good, I love the red."

"Mmm... me too... so much freedom in the color." He allowed Kyo to help him, waiting the three minutes required on the bottle, and then leaned back to rinse it out as well. When he was done, he shut off the water and wrung his hair out before stepping out and grabbing a towel.

Kyo smiled a little then nodded, stepping out as well. Since his hair was still short, he just scrubbed a towel over it then slung it around his hips, going to brush his teeth. He briefly considered shaving but decided against it. Instead, he finished drying off and dropped his towel in the hamper before padding towards the bedroom.

Die duplicated Kyo's efforts, having shaved in the morning so not worrying about it right then. He padded after him and then once they were in the bedroom, he quickly folded the rest of the towels. "Will you put them away, love?" He grabbed a pair of sweats and tugged them on along with an old, worn t-shirt. Pushing his hair back, he headed for the stairs. "Stay up here, I think I want to watch a movie in bed. I'll go choose one and then come back."

Kyo hadn't bothered to dress yet and when Die asked him to put the towels away, he just grabbed them up and headed for the bathroom, still nude. "Okay, would you bring me a water or tea?"

"Will do." Die headed out down the hallway and then downstairs. He got Kyo's tea and a bottle of water for himself before grabbing a DVD at random and coming back with it. He put Kyo's drink on his nightstand and then his bottle of water on his side before popping the movie in and going to curl up on the bed next to the wall, propping pillows behind his back and fast-forwarding through the advertisements. "Apparently it's XXX that Vin Disel movie. You've seen it once, right?"

Kyo finished with the towels and made his way back to the bedroom, tugging on a pair of sweats and nothing else. He climbed into the bed next to Die then laid sideways, his head pillowed on Die's thigh. "Yep, twice I think..."

"Good. Then it fits the criteria." He found the front of the movie and pressed play, cracking open his water and taking a sip from it before lying his hand on Kyo's shoulder, just resting it there as he watched the screen.

Kyo hummed then grabbed his tea, opening it and taking a sip, careful not to spill it in his current position. He screwed the top back on then settled again, his hand idly rubbing Die's leg as he watched the movie.

Die watched avidly, particularly into this particular movie and occasionally making sounds of either warning or empathetic pain when something happened worthy of it.

Kyo paid attention to the movie for the first 45 mins then started to doze slightly, his mind wandering to what would have happened had he not royally fucked Die's plans. He imagined it would have ended in some pretty hot sex and it was that thought that had him growing aroused.

Die found himself growing sleepy in the darkness of the room as well and after a while, he simply rested his head back on the wall and closed his eyes, not really caring that he was falling asleep sitting up. He was allowed every once in a while, right? Right.

Kyo ended up fully dozing for a while, his arousal ignored for the moment. When he awoke, the movie was off and Die was asleep, still sitting there. He sniffed a little and sat up, turning to face Die before leaning in and kissing his lips softly.

Die was fully asleep against the wall when Kyo chose to kiss him. For a few moments, Die didn't respond at all, but then in his half-sleep-drunk state, he let out a soft moan, one hand lightly pawing at Kyo's chest.

Kyo smiled a little once Die responded and continued to kiss him, shifting to run his fingers through his hair. "Hey sleepy head..."

When Kyo shifted back to talk to him, Die let out a quiet groan and popped open one eye, making a face. He licked his lips a little bit and then yawned slightly. "Dozed off... sorry."

Kyo laughed and leaned in to kiss Die's cute face again, tugging on his lip lightly. "Mm, that's okay. I didn't make it past the first half hour..." He stroked his fingers through a few red strands. "Wanna go to bed?"

Die let out a little rumble and then nodded. "Yeah... probably best. Apparently we're getting old, Kyo."

Kyo snorted and shifted off of Die, moving more towards his side of the bed but not fully. "I'm not getting old. Its just been a long week..." He plumped up his pillow and flopped down onto his side, staring at Die.

Die snorted. "Well... I'm getting old. No two ways about that." He got up and went to remove the DVD, placing it back in its holder and then turning off the DVD player and the TV. Coming back over, he plopped down on the bed and closed his eyes, stretching out and then yawning widely.

Kyo just shook his head then watched Die move about. He eventually rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, finding that he wasn't as sleepy as he thought.

"No sassy comment to that?" Die asked, amusement evident in his voice. "Figured you'd have at least had some over the hill comment."

Kyo huffed a little then shook his head. "Sorry, baby. Too busy being in denial that I'm getting old...though you're welcome to follow Kaoru right on over that hill with your walker."

"There, that's more like it." Die laughed softly as he plumped up his pillow again and then rolled around, trying to get comfortable and failing.

Kyo chuckled lightly. "Glad I could please you." He shifted and watched Die move around, raising an eyebrow when his lover didn't settle right away. "What's the matter? Got ants in your pants?"

Die huffed out a sigh. "Can't get comfy," he admitted quietly. "My back hurts, my hip feels strange, and my fuckin' ass is numb. I'm tellin' you, I'm getting old!"

Kyo hummed then sat up. "Want me to massage you? I'm not exactly falling asleep anymore."

Die rolled over again and then huffed at the ceiling. "Not sure it'll help, honestly. It's not really that kind of ache." He sat up finally and pushed his way out of the bed. "I'm going to get some pain killers. Need anything?"

Kyo blinked a little at the refusal of a massage then pressed his lips together, figuring Die wasn't in the mood to be touched. "No, thanks." He sighed and laid back down, pillowing his head on his arms as he stared at the ceiling again, his expression vaguely troubled.

Die padded out of the room and went to go and get two good-sized pain killers from the bathroom. He came back in and downed them with the remaineder of his bottled water, tossing the bottle in the garbage. Settling down, he yawned and then scooted in close to Kyo's side, draping his arm over his lover's stomach. "This okay?"

When Die returned and laid next to him, an arm going over stomach, he was quick to settle his hand on top and smile a little. "Yeah, of course, baby."

Snuggling down, Die closed his eyes and huffed. "Oh lord I ache. Remind me not to sleep sitting up again, yeah?"

Kyo frowned a little, running his hand along Die's arm. "Sure but are you sure that's what did it?" His voice was full of concern, not caring for his lover to be in pain.

"Eh... maybe that and the housework. But I don't really want to blame that... that's ike gyping out on housework."

Kyo chuckled a little as he found Die's hand, lacing their fingers. "We could always just hire a maid."

"It's some of the only external exercise I get... I think giving it up would be stupid, honestly." Die shrugged and then yawned again.

Kyo hummed then quieted down, focusing on evening out his breathing even as his thoughts were still going haywire.

It took Die a while, but eventually he managed to sort of fall alseep, despite his discomfort.

It took Kyo much longer to fall asleep and when he did, it was fitful and plagued with nightmarish exaggerations of his and Die's fight from earlier. 

He finally awoke with a start, drawing in a breath then looking around, squinting in the darkness of the room. He realized that there was faint light filtering from underneath their curtains, signalling early morning. He took another breath then looked over at Die before realizing that in his sleep, his lover had become literally attached to him, octopus style.

Kyo waking up in such an abrupt manner pulled Die from his own sleep and he let out a quiet whine, squeezing Kyo tight before he pulled himself up from the dredges of sleep. Looking around in the semi-darkness, he huffed lightly and then murmured, "You okay?"

Kyo sniffed, reaching up to rub his face with his free hand before turning to look at Die again. "Mm yeah..just..I dunno. Crap I guess."

Die rubbed his side and frowned a little, still blinking bleerily in Kyo's direction. "What kind of crap?"

Kyo huffed a little, somewhat unwilling to share. "Just..uhm...my own mind being me, baby. Nevermind. Just nightmares or something."

Die grunted softly and then patted Kyo before closing his eyes again. "Sleep, love."

Kyo sniffed and shifted down onto the bed a bit, closing his eyes. He tried to sleep but as the early morning light grew brighter, he found himself laying there awake now. Sighing, he realized that there was no way sleep was coming again and threw back the covers, wriggling from Die's grasp and padding off towards the bathroom.

Die whined a little when Kyo wriggled out of bed, but he didn't move, unwilling to give up his cocoon of soft warmth for the unforgiving temperatures of the bedroom and the bright light of anything other than the bedroom.

Kyo did what he had to do in the bathroom then, instead of going back to bed, he wandered downstairs to turn on the coffee maker then leaned against the counter, staring out the kitchen window, still bleary eyed.

It was nearly an hour before Die finally woke up, unable to sleep any longer without Kyo by his side. He got up and padded out of the bedroom, making his way downstairs, completely rumpled from bed, still blinking against the harsh light coming in from outside. Sometimes he still longed for the darkness that had been Kyo's apartment.

Coming downstairs, he came into the kitchen, finding the package of pastries and quickly opening it, pulling out a danish. It was a rare time he indulged, but it sounded amazing right then and he figured he was being a rebel for once.

Kyo had taken his coffee out on the porch and was fiddling with his sketch book when he heard Die doing around in the kitchen. He didn't look up from his drawing though, focusing on it and Die's e-cig that he'd snuck out with him. The vapor curled from between his lips as he shaded a part of the paper almost idly, his thoughts elsewhere.

Die ate the pastry and then wandered to the living room and then around the lower level, looking for Kyo. Finally it was Snow who lead him to Kyo, mewling quietly at the back door. He headed out and closed the door behind himself, chuckling softly as he noticed Kyo was smoking his e-cigarette. He sat down, careful to be quiet so as to not distrub Kyo and then tilted his head slightly, watching him draw.

Kyo heard Die come out and glanced up at him for a moment before going back to his drawing. He scribbled around it some more then stopped, tossing the rather dark piece aside and pulling from the e-cigarette again then slowly huffing it out before setting it aside and looking at Die. "Morning...made coffee..."

Curious, Die reached out and took the drawing, pulling it closer to look at it. His eyes roamed over the piece and he felt a wave of sadness hit him at the contents of it. Pushing it back toward Kyo, he reached for his e-cigarette and took a long drag himself, breathing it out, his eyes closed for the time being. "So... those nightmares," he murmured, "about me?"

Kyo drew his knees up and rested his arms on them, shoulders hunched a bit. He didn't look at Die but murmured out softly, "I dunno...maybe."

"Mmm..." Die took another drag and slowly blew it out into the light breeze. "I told you I forgive you. All that's left is to forgive yourself."

Kyo huffed out a bitter laugh and shifted back in the chair he was sitting on. "You know how that goes for me, Die." He sighed softly. It wasn't that he didn't want to forgive him, he just couldn't yet.

Die sighed softly, shaking his head. "Look... maybe some blunt honesty will help here." He leaned forward, bracing his arms on the table. "Yesterday... yeah, I was upset. I felt like all the effort I'd made to actually let myself do something I wanted was completely for nothing and what little thrill I got out of it was nothing in comparison to how stupid I felt. But... really... you weren't trying to hurt me. You thought that's how I wanted it played out and so you were trying to help get me off on it. It's just a miscommunication, plain and simple. I thought you were trying to tell me I was being a disgusting prick and you thought you were playing my game. The moment we realized we were not on the same page, some things became really clear, really fast. You're sorry... I know that. You know that. And I forgive you because you never meant to hurt me. You were just honestly attempting to help me." He sighed and shrugged. "Besdies... really, I should have given you some warning. It's not fair that you were looking for water wings and I jumped in the deep end of the pool."

Kyo listened to Die talk, the words sinking into his head and swimming around. He was quiet for a while after then reached across the table to take Die's hand, squeezing it hard. "Fine..just...don't forget the floaties next time, yeah?" His lips finally quirked up in a little smile. He wasn't completely over what he'd done but for the moment, he was trying to push it away. Especially since Die seemed perfect fine and that really helped him mentally.

Die gave him a little smile and reached to squeeze his hand. "Yeah... sorry... I guess it was a huge step given I didn't really tell you I... used to do that sort of thing." He sighed and looked away, moving his fingers to lightly stroke Kyo's palm as he stared out across the small yard. Clearing his throat, he looked back at Kyo. "Right, so... what are the plans for today?"

Kyo let out a little chuckle then took a sip of his coffee before tilting his head. "Nothing official but..." He stood up and moved to stand in front of Die, bracing his hands on the arms of the chair. "Do you think we could...spend it in bed?" He smiled a little. "Or this chair...or...the couch."

Die peered up at Kyo and then let out a soft laugh. "Mmm... horny, I take it?" He reached to grasp the vocalist's slim hips, running his fingers along the elastic of his waistband and then dipping in to lightly feel of over his hips.

Kyo smirked a little then shrugged. "I always want you, baby. Besides, what better way to put my brain back on track than giving you pleasure..." He leaned down and caught Die's lips in a kiss.-

Die grunted softly and then reached to pull Kyo onto his lap, kissing him hard. He slid his hand into Kyo's pants, grasping his cock and starting to massage it a bit harshly. After a moment, he pulled back and smirked. "Wanna pay me back?"

Kyo easily settled into Die's lap, his hands going to grasp his lover's shoulders. He moaned into the kiss as Die's hand wrapped around his cock, abusing it slightly. "Hnng...yes..yes I do."

"Then suck me... right here... right now." He gave Kyo a devious look, sitting back in his seat.

Kyo raised an eyebrow then smirked a little, slipping off of Die's lap. He knelt in front of him and ran his hands up over his thighs then along his stomach. Shifting forward, he pushed Die's shirt up and  
started kissing the skin there, slowly heading downward. Once he reached Die's waistband, he nuzzled his crotch a moment before tugging his pants and boxers down, freeing his lover's cock. He flicked his eyes up at Die as he leaned in, swiping his tongue over the head in slow circles.

Die groaned faintly, closing his eyes as Kyo begant to give him the attentions he'd been wanting. But after a few minutes of it, he was still only semi-erect and he silently cursed himself. He was horny as fuck and it felt amazing, but honestly, he just couldn't get hard. The thing was... he knew why... and he knew he couldn't bring it up after yesterday particularly. Opening his eyes, he gave Kyo a pleading look, biting at his lower lip and doing all he could to show him he was enjoying his attentions.

Kyo worked diligently on Die's cock, having started licking up and down the length of it. After a few moments, he caught Die's look and lifted his head, frowning slightly. "What's up baby? Besides not you?"

Die shifted a little bit and then closed his eyes again, swallowing thickly. After a moment, he began to laugh, shaking his head. "You wouldn't fucking believe me if I told you."

Kyo raised an eyebrow, licking his lips. "Well, I know it's not because I suck at this particular act...so..try me." He ran his hand over Die's leg, not moving from his spot just yet.

"Oh... you do suck... in the good way." He shook his head a litlte and then gestured. "I didn't... you know... before I came down here this morning." He sighed. "Just... give me a minute, yeah?"

Kyo snickered at Die's comment then opened his mouth in a little 'oh', catching Die's meaning. "Go right ahead..." He pointed to the corner of the yard then stood, getting out of Die's way.

Die made a little face and then pushed himself up. He wanted to go where Kyo had pointed, but at the same time, he definitely didn't wnat back into that realm right then. Instead, he darted inside and headed right for the lower level bathroom.

Kyo watched Die go inside instead and just shrugged his shoulders, following him after a moment, taking his coffee cup to the sink and rinsing it out. He was completely fine with whatever Die wanted to do that morning, there was no need to force him into something uncomfortable.

It was with much relief that Die emptied his bladder into the toilet. When he was done, he worked himself hard and then tucked himself back into his pants, heading back out to find Kyo.

Kyo heard Die walking down the hall and stepped out to greet him, his eyes immediately spotting the way his pants strained. "Mmm, I see that helped..." He was quick to drop to his knees, nuzzling against Die's cloth covered dick.

Die smirked, reaching down to spear his hand in Kyo's hair. "It did... c'mon... suck me now. I promise it'll be worth your while."

Kyo chuckled and once more tugged Die's pants and boxers out of his way, revealing his lover's arousal to his gaze. He groaned and reached up, grasping the base as he wrapped his lips around the tip, sucking hard then slowly starting to bob his head.

"Ah yeah... just like that, baby... fuck..." Die groaned, pushing his hips forward, already incredibly horny just from the thought of making Kyo suck him off like this, right in the middle of the fucking room.

Kyo reached up to run his nails over Die's hip as he pushed down all the way, burying his nose into Die's pubic hair then swallowing. He barely pulled back before doing it again and then again, swallowing around his lover's cock repeatedly, a moan escaping him.

Die honestly didn't last very long. After a few more moments, he grabbed Kyo's hair hard and held him in place, pulling out and grasping his dick with the other hand, frantically jerking off. With a loud groan, he came, splattering his offering all over Kyo's face, watching as it landed on him.

Kyo groaned as Die's hand tugged his hair then held him in place. He was quick to open his mouth, watching his lover jerk off then cum on his face. He caught some of it in his mouth but there were a few spurts that his his cheeks, lips and chin. After Die was finished, he swallowed what was in his mouth then flicked his tongue out, slicking it over the head of his cock with a smirk.

Die stood there, panting slightly from his orgasm, looking completely thrilled with himself. He let Kyo go and stepped back, smirking at him as he stroked his cock a few more times. "So pretty with my cum all over."

Kyo licked his lips then dipped his tongue down far enough to get to his chin before gazing up at Die, his hand settling over his own sizeable bulge. "Mmm, you think so? You should do it more often.." He stood up then before taking two fingers and wiping the mess from his cheeks before sliding them into his mouth, sucking them lewdly.

"Oh yeah?" Die chuckled softly, reaching to hold onto the back of the couch, more than a little weak-kneed from his orgasm. "Mmm... sounds like amazing fun."

Kyo pulled his fingers from his mouth with a loud "pop" then moved to perch on the arm of the couch. "Mm, I bet." He chuckled lowly before licking his lips, somewhat revelling in the taste of his lover's cum.

Die winked at his lover and then wet his lips a bit. "Two options. I suck you off or you fuck me. Right here. In the living room."

Kyo stared at Die for a moment then grinned, pushing his pants down out of the way, giving himself a few strokes. "Mm why don't you wrap those pretty lips around my cock, baby? "

There was a moment in which, Die wasn't entirely certain what was going to happen. He settled down on his knees, making quite the show of it. Pushing his hair back behind his shoulders he smirked and then ran one hand through the top of his hair, pushing bangs back from his face. Slowly... tortorously, he ran his tongue over his lips. "Hnng..." he let out a soft sound and then reached for Kyo's hips. "Come closer, love."

Kyo smirked as Die got to his knees, pushing up off of the arm of the couch to stand before him. He reached down to spear his fingers into red tinted locks, his eyes focused on the teasing tongue that slipped out.

Die reached out and then trailed his fingertips over his hips, over the lovely vein running down toward the most dangerous zone Kyo owned. Die let out a guttural sound of pure lust and then leaned in, flicking his tongue over the head of his cock.

Kyo moaned softly as Die's hands slid over his skin, a shudder going through him. He grunted lowly as Die's tongue flicked over the head of his cock, causing it to flex a bit.

"Steady, love," Die murmured quietly. He reached out and grasped the other's length, holding him steady and then leaning in to suck lightly on the head.

Kyo smirked a bit and stroked his fingers through Die's hair then settled his hand once more, letting out a sigh of pleasure. "Hard to be steady when I have such a gorgeous pair of lips on me."

Die just gave him a sassy look, leaning toward him more and pushing down on his length with a lewd groan.

Kyo let out a loud groan as Die pushed down on him, engulfing his cock with glorious wet heat. "Ah, fuck..yes.."

Bobbing his head slightly, Die closed his eyes and slid as far down as he could possibly get. He let out a groan and then sucked hard.

Kyo rocked his hips slightly, reveling in the feel of Die's mouth on him, another moan sliding past his lips. "Die...Gods..."

Die slid all the way down, nose buried in Kyo's hair. For a moment, he almost wanted to laugh, knowing well that his thoughts were certainly not usual for such a time. But pulling back up, he composed himself and started moving faster.

Kyo was unaware of Die's strange thoughts, his mind focused totally on the delicious pleasure around his cock. He re-tangled his hand in Die's hair, tugging a little harshly as he bucked his hips, moving in time with Die, his breath starting to come in pants.

Die let out a soft growl and then grabbed Kyo's hips and held them tight, forcing his lover to stay still while he moved faster and faster over him, his eyes tearing up slightly as he stared up at his lover.

Kyo huffed when his hips were held but as Die started swallowing him again and again, he could feel the familiar sensation coiling in his abdomen. He gazed down at Die, moaning as he stroked his hair, his cock twitching inside his lover's mouth. "Fuck..so close baby..."

Die kept right on going, keeping his pace like the rhythm guitarist he was, knowing that consistency was the key to Kyo's orgasm like this. Not going faster at the end, not falling apart... no... steady does it was how you got Kyo off quickest.

It wasn't long before Kyo gave Die's hair another tug as a warning before letting out a loud moan as he began cumming, spurting down Die's throat with a shudder.

Die groaned as Kyo started to fill his mouth with cum. He swallowed thickly and then pulled back, opening his mouth and then showing Kyo that he'd swallowed it all. With a smirk, he winked at him and then stood up. "Tasty."

Kyo stared down at Die as the other showed off his cum, giving a breathless laugh. When Die stood, he grabbed him and pulled him forward, kissing him hard, thrusting his tongue into his mouth to get a taste of himself there. He pulled back after a moment and smirked, licking his lips. "Tasty indeed..."

Die let out a soft grunt and then chuckled, reaching one hand down to tangle in Kyo's short-and-curlies. "Someone... should definitely come to the shower with me... and let me help a little down here." He smirked at him and then let out a quiet laugh.

Kyo winced just the tiniest bit when Die's fingers gave his pubes a tug. He had the good sense to look faintly embarrassed then snorted. "Fine, fine...you can trim my bush...wouldn't want you suffocating then next time you blow me."

Die leaned in and kissed him gently. "Mmm... I love you, sweetheart. But seriously... pubes don't taste good."

Kyo chuckled and kissed Die back before turning and heading towards the stairs. "Yes, I know...which is why I'm thankful you trim, baby."

"Hnn... tell me about these other cocks you've sucked that the owner didn't trim then." He goosed Kyo's ass and then pulled his pants back up. "I mean it... I wanna know. Call me a perv."

Kyo made a sound at the goosing then laughed, shaking his head. "Ah, there was one guy...the worst one...This was way back in the day, mind you but he was like half-Italian and his bush stuck out of his briefs. I almost didn't but I was already drunk and he'd just let me blow my load on his face so...yeah, I was spitting out hair for a while."

Die choked out a laugh and then gestured. "Seriously? _Out_ of his fucking briefs?!"

Kyo paused on the stairs and turned to grin at Die. "Yup, out of his briefs. It was a goddamned forest." He shook his head and moved on upstairs before pausing again. "I'm just glad he didn't ask me to rim him or something..."

Another lovely choke. "Dear god." He laughed and shook his head. "Mmm... talk about salad tossing." He headed up the stairs toward the top.

Kyo let out a loud laugh and shook his head. "Oh God...indeed. Either way, I haven't thought of that in years. Nowadays, I wouldn't even think of touching it."

Die moved up the stairs and then headed toward the bathroom. "Let's see... four... maybe five years ago now? Bathroom. Bar. I got that cock in my mouth and I swear to you... I damn near puked. Fuckin' tasted like rimming an unwashed asshole."

Kyo paused by the bathroom door and wrinkled up his face at the very though. "Oh God...what did you do? Did you finish him?"

"I jerked him off and tried to pretend it was sexy to drool all over myself." He went to go and get the trimmer from the cabinet and then settled down on the toilet seat. "Get over here, bushy."

Kyo shuddered at the very thought then moved over to Die, stripping completely out of his pants. "Nothing like stanky crotch..."

"Yeah... nothing at all." He gestured Kyo close and then chuckled as he turned on the razor and then went to town on the other. "Even after you've been on stage, you seriously do not go and stick up the place like that."

Kyo reached out and rested his hand on Die's shoulder, completely trusting him to trim his pubes up nicely. "That's because I shower beforehand..."

Die licked his lips a little and then finished up with his pubes. He lightly lifted his cock and then trimmed the hair on his balls as well, using the trimmer end. Lifting his sac, he kept going and then finally finished up. "Hnn... lookin' sharp. Now go and get in the shower."

Kyo watched Die work on trimming him, a smile on his face. He shifted his stance a bit when Die lifted his sac, getting in a more steady position, not wanting that to get cut or scraped in anyway. When Die was finally finished, he reached down and ran his hand over the area, humming in approval. "Mm, thanks baby." He turned and wandered into the shower, flipping the water on.

Die stood up and then ditched his pants on the floor. Going back to the same area, he'd trimmed Kyo up in, he started to trim himself, only needing a tiny touch-up. Finishing up, he dusted and then put the razor away, grabbed the broom and swept up. He headed right toward the shower then, tossing his shirt aside. "Okay, there we go."

Kyo watched from the shower while Die trimmed himself, a smirk dancing on his face. "Very sexy. Next time, you should shave a D into it."

Die arched an eyebrow at Kyo. "I think that.. might be tacky." He laughed softly, moving ot slip into the shower with Kyo, settling under the spray for a moment and then shifting away to start soaping up, paying careful attention to where he'd been shaving. "You're just lucky I stopped shaving my pits and shit."

Kyo just stood leaning against the shower wall, laughing. "Mm, I'm glad you did. I like you to look...and smell... a little manly." He smirked and reached out, slipping his hands over Die's hips, ignoring the fact that his lover was trying to get clean.

That stopped Die right in his path and he smirked a bit. "Oh?" He lightly pushed Kyo against the wall and then leaned in. "You like my scent?"

Kyo looked up at Die and ran his tongue slowly over his lips before smirking.

"Mm, I do..." He slid his hand up Die's chest then over to rub under his armpit, lightly toying with the hair there.

Die slowly slid his hands up the wall and then leaned closer, giving Kyo better access, dipping his head down to lightly nip at the juncture of Kyo's neck and shoulder. "Well... I adore the taste of your cum... if we're confessing things."

Kyo hummed softly, leaning in to kiss the skin at the edge of Die's pit before smirking and turning to run his tongue over the hair there, inhaling Die's scent while he did. "Is that so? I have no problem letting you get your fill of it, you know..."

Despite all that had transpired just minutes before, Die was incredibly aroused by the direction things were heading in. Kyo's little confession made things easier in many ways on him. His breath hitched as he moved in closer to push against Kyo more fully, sharing his soaped up body with his lover, semi-cleaning him that way. "You know... we never ordered horrible take-out like we were supposed to."

Kyo grunted softly as Die pressed against him, pulling back slighlty and running his palms over Die's chest before pressing in and rubbing against him, enjoying the slick sensation the soap provided. At Die's statement, he raised an eyebrow and chuckled lowly. "No, we didn't..."

"So now we know what we're doing today..." Die took a large amount of skin between his teeth and slowly began to apply pressure, seeing how far he'd get before Kyo panicked that they had to get on stage in a few days.

The vocalist chuckled again. "Indeed..." He pushed a hand into Die's hair, inhaling sharply as the pleasure pain went straight to his dick. He bit his lip, holding out as long as he could before gently tugging on his lover's hair. "Wouldn't look good on stage to have bite marks on my neck, baby..."

Die let out a sharp growl as he was tugged back.

He licked the spot and then sighed quietly, nuzzling it. "What if I want to mark you as my own for the world to see?"

Kyo's eyes narrowed slightly then the softest moan escaped him as he stroked his fingers through his lover's hair. After a moment's debate, he licked his lips then pushed against Die's head, pushing his mouth against his neck. "Do it, then..."

Arousal swelled up thick and fast inside Die's body as he was given permission to mark his lover. Grasping the short hairs at the nape of Kyo's neck, he held him still as he leaned in, right behind his tattoo and began to suck, grinding his hips against his lover's in the meantime.

Kyo whimpered and tilted his head to the side as Die's mouth latched onto his neck. He was quickly growing hard again and the grinding of Die's hips against his pulled a moan from his lips. "Yes..claim me..."

Die took the way the other responded to him in favor and only released him long enough to grasp the shower head, spray it between them to get the soap away, and then reseat it as he latched back onto that spot on his neck. Reaching down, he lifted one of Kyo's legs and helped get him in the right position to press his cock against his opening.

Kyo watched as Die rinsed the soap away then groaned as his leg was lifted. He shifted himself slightly then braced his hands on Die's shoulders, pushing down against his cock, moaning as the tip slipped into his body. "Oh Gods..."

"You want it so fuckin' bad, don't you?" Die breathed out against his neck. Some part of him realized they were perhaps acting rather sex crazed, but it had been a while and his libido was on fire. And the truth remained that one day his own sex drive would diminish and he wanted as much as he could get before that happened. Feeling the tip slip inside his lover, he moaned, hips slamming forward to push the rest of his length into his lover's body.

Kyo breathed out a, "Yes," in response to Die's rhetorical question, his rigid length standing between them proving that he did indeed want it bad despite having orgasmed not too long ago. 

Die's cock slammed into him and he let out a cry, his nails digging sharply into Die's shoulders. "Die!"

"That's right," he huffed out against Kyo's neck as he began licking and nipping at the flesh there. "Call my name for the world to hear." His hips played out a sharp staccato against Kyo's body, his actions swift and somewhat desperate.

Kyo let his head drop back against the shower wall, his body rocking against Die's as best as he could in his current position. He repeatedly cried out Die's name, damn near singing it as his pleasure built, coiling tight in his stomach, ready to snap at any moment.

Die's excitement ramped up as Kyo's voice did. He knew with all respect that Kyo shouldn't be using his voice on him, but the truth was, he couldn't bring himself to urge him to do anything but keep going with it. It was glorious and delicious to his ears.

Kyo could have cared less about what he was doing to his voice at the moment, the pleasure of Die taking him, claiming him in more ways than one was overwhelming his senses. He held on tight to his lover, panting heavily, moving against him until finally, the coil within him snapped and he came hard between them without a single touch to his cock. "D-die!"

Die's fingers moved from the wall to Kyo's chest. He waited, listening to his lover's breathing, never breaking his pace as he fucked him. When he heard Kyo's breath hitch, he scraped his nails over his lover's chest and then slid his hand up firmly around his neck, choking him for a few seconds, his lips on his ear. "I fucking love you like no one else." The last word was forced out, his own orgasm slamming into him full-force. With a strangled moan, he came hard, his hips pushing forward, making circles against Kyo's body as he filled him.

Die's nails scraping over his chest and then those talented fingers wrapping around his throat made Kyo nearly black out from the sheer pleasure of it. He shuddered at his lover's words, clinging to him tightly as he felt Die cumming deep inside him. He buried his nose against Die's shoulder, panting against the moist skin there as he rocked with him, moaning softly. "Fuck..."

Die kept it up until he couldn't take the pleasure on his cock any longer. Pulling out, he knelt down and pushed Kyo against the wall to keep him there, shoving his legs apart. Quickly, he inserted two fingers inside his lover and found his prostate, instantly starting to thrust against it.

Confusion flitted over Kyo's face when Die knelt down but then his eyes rolled into the back of his head as intense pleasure swept over him from Die's fingers thrusting against his prostate. His entire body trembled as he clawed at the wall, a thin cry escaping him. "O-oh Gods!"

"Yes," Die hissed out, watching his lover's face for his reaction. "You like this... c'mon... scream it, baby."

After a moment, Kyo forced his eyes open and stared down at Die with lust and desire etched onto his features. His cock bobbed between them, achingly hard still, the tip ruddy with need. "Fuck...Daisuke!!"

Die groaned faintly at Kyo's voicing of his need. He leaned in, licking the tip of Kyo's cock and then simply nuzzling it against his lips as he continued to fuck his lover with his fingers. He loved making Kyo weak-kneed with lust and it'd been far too long since he'd indulged in it in his opinion.

Kyo didn't want this to end despite the torture he was experiencing teetering on the edge of bliss. Die's tongue on the tip of his cock about did him in and finally, he reached to grab his lover's free hand, placing it on his rib cage. "Please..." he choked out between moans, barely able to breathe properly.

Without a moment of hesitation, Die obeyed Kyo's plea, curling his fingers so his short nails actually touched his skin, raking it across the area harshly, sliding the tip of Kyo's cock into his mouth for one moment for a harsh suck before he pulled back to let his lover cum all over his face.

As Die's nails dug into his skin, a scream ripped free from his throat and he lost it completely. He hold onto Die's shoulder for dear life as he came hard all over his lover's face, coating it a good bit despite having just cum. "Die.."

Die let out a quiet chuckle, giving Kyo's prostate one last rub before he pulled his fingers out and rinsed them under the water. "Turn around, baby," he murmured, lightly goosing his ass.

Kyo slumped against the shower wall, panting harshly as he stared down at Die, groaning softly. He let out a huff of breath and shifted, turning around and leaning against the wall that way. "Fuck..baby..."

Die reached for that lovely ass and spread the cheeks apart. "Push my cum out," he murmured, a little thrill sliding through his body at the idea of watching this happen.

Kyo grunted and bit his lip, sticking his hips out a bit then pushing, feeling Die's cum sliding out of his body and down his thighs.

Die watched as the cum oozed out of Kyo's body, running down his inner thigh. He chuckled softly and reached to lightly run his fingers through it. "Mmm... lovely." He issued a light smack to Kyo's ass and then pulled back. "Hand me the shower head."

Kyo shivered a bit then groaned at the smack. He reached up and grabbed the shower head, passing it back to Die. "Mmm you're in quite the mood today..."

"Hnn," Die returned quietly, moving to take the shower head and then spraying it toward Kyo's crack, letting it wash away the cum, his fingertips lightly rubbing the area to help, dipping inside a bit.

Kyo let Die clean him, his body clenching around Die's fingers slightly as they slipped inside. When Die was finally finished, he turned around and threaded his fingers through Die's hair, tugging him up to kiss him deeply.

Die almost laughed when Kyo pulled him up and then kissed him back equally as soundly, completely pleased with it. "I love you."

Kyo smirked at Die a little. "Hnn, love you, too, gorgeous."

Die shifted back and began washing his face off. "Mmm... so... did you enjoy that?"

Kyo huffed out a laugh and shifted to grab the sponge, getting himself cleaned off properly. "Not in the least. It was so awful I had to cum twice just to prove how awful it was."

"I see how it is." He laughed softly and then shrugged. "Just really horny after... you know."

Kyo hummed and rinsed off before leaning in to kiss Die again. "I know...and to be honest, that little bit there was fucking amazing."

"I'll remember that." He winked a bit and then finished rinsing off, stepping out of the shower and grabbing a towel.

Kyo grinned and stepped out of the shower after Die, quickly toweling off. "Mm, good."

Die tied the towel around his waist and made his way out of the bathroom. "So... um... what kind of takeout did we want?"

Kyo padded after Die, leaving the towel in the hamper. "Hmm...haven't had a really good pizza in forever..."

"Sounds good to me." He wandered toward the bedroom, going ot get his phone from where he'd plugged it in. "Toppings?"

Kyo headed into the bedroom and tugged on some sweats before flopping down on the bed. "Mmm...whatever, just get extra cheese."

"Will do." Die dialed the only pizza place he ever used and then listened quietly to their specials. Once they were done, he gave his number to pull up his account, listed under Lester Lestrade, something the poor guy struggled with, quite to Die's amusement. He licked his lips a little and then ordered a large with extra cheese, sausage, onion, and olives. It came with ten hot wings and a 2-liter of soda, which he ordered Sprite for. Smirking, he hung up the phone, opting to pay in cash and then plopped down on the bed.

Kyo listened to Die order the pizza, snorting lightly at the false name. He opened his mouth to repeat it but then decided against it, knowing it would come out ridiculous sounding. He huffed out a breath then shifted to sit behind Die, smoothing his hands over his lover's back.

Die closed his eyes as Kyo ran his hands over his back. Quietly, he asked, "Would you rub it?"

Kyo smiled softly and dipped his head down to press a soft kiss to the back of Die's neck. "Of course." He got into a better position before running his palms over Die's back once more then starting to lightly massage the muscles there.

"Mmm... that feels nice... thank you, love."Die let out a soft sigh, enjoying what was going on.

Kyo continued, moving down Die's back slowly, digging his fingertips into a few knots here and there. When he reached Die's lower back, he massaged it then moved his hands back up to his lover's shoulders. Here, he paid more attention to what he was doing, knowing that repeatedly playing the guitar could get to Die and cause him discomfort.

Die let out a low hiss at his lower back and then actually gasped at his lover's hands on his shoulders. But after a moment, he issued a moan and then laughed. "Fucking shit... what is wrong with my body?"

Kyo raised an eyebrow at Die's reactions then laughed, sliding his hands around to rub over Die's chest. "Mm, it's just your unending attraction to me." He nuzzled his nose against Die's neck, pressing light kisses to the skin there.

"Or maybe it's that you have magic fingers." He let out a chuckle and then leaned back into Kyo's caress. "Can we just roll around and fuck and eat and watch random TV all day?"

Kyo grinned, tracing circles over Die's chest, flicking a nipple with his thumb. "I beg to differ, love. You're the guitar player, not me." He chuckled then nipped at Die's neck for the hell of it. "Skip the TV and I"m good to go. Watching TV would just take away time from fucking."

A giggle slipped out from between Die's lips before he could catch it and he just lolled back on Kyo, letting his weight lean on the other. "Rub me all over... I like it."

The vocalist just grinned and turned to press his lips to Die's temple before doing as he was asked. He stroked over Die's chest then downward, lightly rubbing his stomach then using a firmer touch on his ribs and sides.

Die's hips lifted a bit and he let out a soft coo. "Feels nice... so nice."

Kyo moved down, stroking Die's hips and then inner thighs, really unable to reach any further. "Good.."

Die shifted his head a little and nipped under Kyo's jaw. "My dick's hard... again." He huffed out another laugh. "Shit. I'm just riled up beyond belief today."

Kyo chuckled and slid his hand over the bulge in Die's pants. "I noticed..." He moved his hands back up to toy with Die's chest, scraping the skin with his claws.

"Mmm... if you noticed, then fix it." Die nipped lightly again. "I have a request... if you're okay with that."

"I intended to fix it..." He titled his head back slightly, enjoying Die's nips. "Mm, what's your request, baby?"

"Remember the prostate massager you bought me? We used it only once?" He bit his lower lip. "Yeah... that."

It took Kyo a few moments to remember what Die was talking about but then he recalled the black, curved massager with a smirk. "Hmm I think that can be arranged...but....the pizza'll be here in like...ten minutes..."

Die grunted a little. "Trust me... I can get off in like five. You have no idea, but my body is trying to kill me right now with horny."

Kyo hummed and reached back down, groping his lover for a moment before gently pushing him up. "My poor love..." He shifted and got up, going to dig through their toy box to find the massager. 

Once he'd found it, he inspected it for cleanliness then moved back to the bed with it. "Mm, on your hands and knese, gorgeous.

Die immediately got up and then plopped down on the bed with his face agaisnt the pillows and his ass up in the air. He moved the towel so it was under him to catch his release when he came.

Kyo watched Die get into position as he grabbed a bottle of lube then settled behind him. He considered something for a moment then nodded his head slightly. "Mm, such a gorgeous ass..." He patted one cheek then grasped them both and spread them open. "So incredibly gorgeous..." He licked his lips then leaned in, pressing them to Die's puckered skin, lightly kissing around the area.

Die gasped as Kyo's mouth pressed against him. Years ago he'd found rimming to be a disgusting practice and he'd never wanted it nor wanted to try it. But since he'd been with Kyo, he discovered it was amazing when your lover was actually cleanly. With a groan, he shoved his face into the pillow and reached down to his own dick, jerking himself off a bit.

Kyo turned his head slightly to nip at Die's cheek before turning back and swiping his tongue over his entrance. He groaned and started lapping at the area, licking from tail bone to taint ever once in a while.

Die let it go on for quite a while before whining. "Please... they'll be here soon... just... please."

Kyo hummed and pulled back after another moment. He gave Die's ass a swat then grabbed the toy, lubing it up well before pressing it against his lover's entrance. He pushed it into Die slowly, being careful even though the toy was slender.

Die let out a choked sob at being filled, arching his behind up in the air, very much obivously enjoying what was going on. "Y-yes!"

Kyo worked the toy in and out slightly then pushed it in about as far as he thought it needed to go to be against Die's prostate. He flipped the switch on, turning the intensity to medium for now.

Die let out a whine, arching back toward his lover and the lovely toy they were currently playing with. He pushed on it until it was actually right where it felt best and then he relaxed, one hand still steadily running along the length of his cock.

Kyo watched as Die shifted and adjusted himself, knowing he was getting the toy just right. He turned it up another bit then lightly moved it back and forth, brushing over Die's prostate. "Mm, beautiful, baby."

Die huffed out a groan and buried his face in the pillow, cutting off his ability to breathe as he stroked himself faster, letting Kyo do all of the thrusting. His body burned in multiple ways, begging for oxygen and desiring his end at the same time. With a jerk of his hips, he started to cum in one way, but he still needed it in the second way and he just prayed Kyo would understand and keep going.  
Kyo shifted behind Die, increasing the speed of his thrusts, working the toy in and out of him hard and fast. He smoothed his free hand over Die's back, settling it there as he watched Die cum. Smirking, he pushed him down, making his cock rub against his fresh mess.

Die moved his hand, allowing Kyo to do what he wanted with him. He finally moved his head, gasping for air in the same moment that the deeper prostate orgasm ripped through him. He let out something close to a sob as shudders wracked his entire body.

Kyo watched as Die came undone in an entirely different way than before. He groaned lowly, pushing the toy against Die's prostate a couple of more times before pulling it out, turning it off and setting it aside. "So beautiful..."

Die lay there, panting quietly as he tried to regain his composure in some way. He wet his lips a little and then huffed out a quiet laugh. "Thank you, love."

Kyo smiled and leaned in to press his lips to Die's butt cheek. "Anytime, koi..." He moved off the bed and grabbed the toy, running to the sink with it for the moment. He washed his hands and rinsed his mouth quickly before grabbing a washcloth, taking it back into the bedroom. 

Once he was back in the room, he gave Die's rear a quick clean up with the cloth then tossed it aside before curling up next to him, huffing out a sigh. "Have I told you that you're perfect?"

Die blushed faintly when Kyo returned to the room with a cloth and cleaned him, complimenting him. "I could say the exact same about you, my love." 

The doorbell went off and Die sighed. "Would you get it? Money's in the tray on my dresser," he mumbled.

Kyo simply smiled, stroking his hand over Die's cheek. The moment was interrupted by the doorbell and he huffed a little but got up anyway. "I"ll be back in a few minutes then." He grabbed the cash and made his way downstairs, quickly paying for the pizza. 

He took it to the kitchen with him, grabbing two plates and two sodas from the fridge before heading back up to the bedroom, grinning at Die. "Pizza in bed?"

Die had rolled over and cleaned up his front end by the time Kyo got back. He was still naked as the day he was born, but for once it didn't seem to bother him like it usually did. "Yeah... sounds great. And if we drop anything we can lick it off one another." He laughed, reaching for a plate and then serving himself some of the food.

Kyo chuckled and settled in next to Die, leaning over to kiss his cheek before grabbing his own slice of pizza. He picked the olives off of it then bit into the cheesy goodness with an uninhibited groan.  
Die watched Kyo pick off the olives and made note of it for future reference. It was strange how many things he still didn't know and only found out through trial and error, even after so long of knowing the other man. He picked up his own slice and bit into it with a groan.

Kyo didn't waste time with the first slice and soon was on the second one, nibbling it a bit slower as he leaned against Die. "You know, I could do this every day..."

"Then we'd have to work it off twice as much... not that I'm complaining... as long as exercise is sex, then I'm all for it." He laughed and shook his hair back from his eyes, taking another bite.

Kyo grinned at the idea as he chewed his bite. "I think I could deal with doing twice as much sex..." He chuckled and went back to his pizza, focusing on finishing it off.

"Our dicks might chafe you know..." He laughed and shrugged.

Kyo snorted lightly, shaking his head. "Maybe but they make cream for that and we could always try tantric sex."

Die wet his lips and then flopped over onto his side, still munching on the pizza. "I feel like someone slipped me Viagra today," he admitted quietly, flushing faintly.

Kyo turned to look at Die curiously, his eyebrow raised. "Speaking from experience, love?" He shifted and took the last bite of crust of his piece, peering at Die still, his lips quirked the slightest bit.

Die at least had the grace to look ashamed for a moment before he cleared his throat and then nodded. "Yeah. My twenties were... uh... special. We'll go with special."

Kyo blinked then laughed a little. "Really now? Special, hm?" He was, admittedly, quite curious about it.

It was clear to Die that Kyo wanted more than just a simple admission and he finished off his pizza, leaning up to get the cup of ice and the soda bottle. "So... you know how I told you when we started dating that I was pretty much a whore for a while, trying to make up for the fact that I wasn't getting what I wanted?"

Kyo followed suit with getting his own soda, taking a sip before nodding. "Yeah?"

"So during that time, I honestly fucked around... a lot. And sometimes I'd be too drunk to get it up, so I got a prescription from a not so scrupulous doctor for Viagra. Let me tell you... that is not fun shit after two hours." He made a face and then took another drink of soda.

Kyo frowned slightly then reached out to run his hand over Die's knee. "Sounds rather painful..."

"Yeah.. it is." Die rolled over onto his front and then turned his head to watch Kyo. "I know you love me, but sometimes it's hard for me to understand how with all of my past."

Die's next words cut through him like a knife and he found himself clenching his jaw for a moment. "Daisuke...how could you even think that way?" He sat for a moment, fighting to find the right words other than screaming at Die about how much he would move the sun and stars for him. Finally, he sighed and reached out to take Die's hand, squeezing it hard. "I love you as you are now and yesterday and tomorrow...no matter what."

Die offered him a soft smile, turning his hand to lace their fingers together. "I know things like that are hard for you to hear... but I think it's also important because it shows you that when you're feeling down, you're really not alone. I just hide it more... that's all."

Kyo huffed a bit, shaking his head. "Don't hide it, okay? Tell me and if all I can do is hold your hand while you rant about this or that, then so be it."

"I wouldn't be me if I spilled everything all the time, love. You know that as well as I do." He pulled Kyo's hand up and kissed the back of it. "You're amazing and you've made me feel better than anyone else ever has."

Kyo hummed then shifted to lie next to Die, curling up beside him and kissing his lips softly. "I'm glad..."

Die lightly poked Kyo's nose and the sniffed a bit. "I love you, my sweatpea."

Kyo wrinkled his nose, both at the poke and the silly nickname. "I love you, too, snook 'ums." He grinned then wrapped his arm around Die's waist, nuzzling into his neck.

Die flailed around a little and got another piece of pizza, jamming it into Kyo's mouth and then laughing as he grabbed one for himself.

Kyo blinked at the piece of pizza, flailing a little himself and sitting up. He went out removing the olives then started eating it, shaking his head at Die. "If you didn't wanna cuddle, all you had to do was say so."

"Hey, I don't mind the cuddling, but the purpose of the junk food was to eat it so I'd get back to my proper weight, not let it get cold and icky."

Kyo snorted and reached out to poke Die's rib. "That's true but I'm not sure I need to gain any more weight." He set his piece down in favor of grabbing one of the hot wings, nibbling it carefully so as not to make a mess.

"You didn't eat at all in the hospital and I know you've been eating like me. Stands to reason... we both need this."

"Bah..." That was all he said on the matter as he finished off the wing then went back to the pizza. Die was right, of course, he'd gone several days without eating while he was sick simply because it hurt too bad to swallow anything.

The rest of mealtime was mostly spent in silence, the pair of them polishing off the wings and half the pizza. By then, Die was so full his belly was slightly pooched out and he took to rubbing it lightly, lounging against the headboard. "Hey... jerk... you knocked me up." He let out a snort and smirked at the other.

Kyo had just taken the last sip of his soda when Die mentioned something about being knocked up, causing him to almost spew everywhere. He looked up at his lover then grinned as he noticed his belly poking out a bit. "Oh..no...it's not mine..." He laughed and shifted, reaching out to run his hand over Die's stomach. "Hey, I think I felt it kicking..."

Die rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I totally somehow got knocked up by the pizza man." He shook his head a little and then laughed.

Kyo burst out laughing at that, patting Die's food baby. ."You slut you...I knew you liked foreign men..."

Die snorted. "Mmm... delicious. Tastes like pizza."

Kyo rolled his eyes then flopped back, letting out a huff of breath. "I ate too much..."

"You and me both... blah." Die sat there, holding his stomach for a while and then closed his eyes. "Mmm... nap time?"

Kyo looked over at Die then nodded. "Mhm, I think so..."

"Good..." Die murmured, yawning and then trying to let himself sort of drift off.

Kyo yawned widely and shifted around until he was comfortable. He closed his eyes and relaxed into the bed, soon drifting off into a light doze.


	46. Chapter 46

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

Die wasn't entirely sure what had compelled him to sit down and look through old live videos of the band online, but he found himself absorbed in a whole other world as he watched them now. Something was so incredibly different about watching Kyo now that he was with him, his affection for the vocalist sealed and stamped with a proper name rather than afloat in an abyss of undefined emotion. 

He clicked through to Fukai and sat, watching Kyo's performance, something like anxiety boiling in his veins as he listened to the words, as he watched his lover's face contort in what could only be called pain. And then the razorblade came into play and Die winced, forcing himself to watch the display that half made him sick to his stomach. 

He pursed his lips and minimized the window, slowly pushing back from the desk and looking up the stairs where Kyo had disappeared about ten minutes earlier. "Kyo?" he called out, seeing if his lover was somewhere he could hear him.

Kyo was just exiting the bathroom when he heard Die call him. He made his way to the top of the stairs and called out, "Yeah?"

Die wetted his lips a bit and then crossed one leg over the other. "Come down here when you're done?"

Kyo shrugged a bit and made his way downstairs, moving into the living room and coming to stand by Die, his hand sliding over his lover's shoulder. "What's up?"

Die shifted around, moving the chair closer to the computer desk and then lightly pulled Kyo down to sit on his lap. With one arm around his waist, he reached over and pressed play on the live video of Fukai.

Kyo blinked a bit as he was pulled into Die's lap but settled quickly, his eyes focusing on the screen as the video began.

A few minutes into the song had Kyo wincing as he listened to his voice spew out lyrics that spoke of agony and heartbreak. "Okay...why are we watching this?"

"Just... watch to the end," Die issued quietly. "Please."

Kyo sniffed slightly and shifted in Die's lap, watching as his younger self pulled out the razor blade and began slicing into his own skin. 

As he watched, he turned his wrist over and glanced at the ink covered scars there, barely visible except to those who knew they existed. He let out a soft huff, the emotions from that time long ago seeming to be someone else's now. It was a pain he could no longer relate to.

Die took note of Kyo's reactions along with his own. His seeming nonchalance on stage that he knew was internal pain that would flair later in the evening as he waited for Kyo to pass out so he could tend to the wounds. This wasn't the concert that brought him the most pain and for that, he was grateful. There was no record of the worst moments that he knew of.

His arms tightened around Kyo's waist as the video ended. He lightly pressed his lips to the other's arm. "So... I have a question."

Kyo didn't speak for a few moments, caught up in his own memories. He finally glanced at Die, frowning a little. "And what's that?"

"I had never really regarded it... I guess I just assumed lyrics were lyrics and your pain was related to something else. But now, looking back on it... I feel stupid. It seems so obvious that it was maybe... more related than I thought?" It wasn't really in question format, but it'd have to do.

Kyo listened to Die then sighed softly, his body tensing a bit. "It....was sometimes just lyrics...but yes, sometimes it was...speaking from experience."

"And Fukai?" Die asked quietly, "Experience or... just lyrics?"

The vocalist pressed his lips together as he stared hard at the ground. "Experience...," he murmured lowly, almost reluctant to admit that he'd ever felt so strongly for another person other than Die.

Die ran his hand lightly over Kyo's side. He didn't feel any form of jealousy, oddly. Rather, he felt a slight anger toward the one that would have hurt Kyo so badly... that would have gone so far as to cheat on such a wonderful man. His voice was filled with emotion when he murmured, "What happened?"

Kyo leaned into Die's touch, finding it soothing as old emotions and turmoil were dredged up from the dark corner in his heart he'd locked them in. He took a breath then closed his eyes, his voice coming out quiet. 

"She was my first serious relationship after a long spell of just fucking around. At first, I thought she might save me from myself... and for a while, she did but it didn't last. It started with little shit and then escalated to me coming home early one night to find her in bed with another guy." 

He paused, looking more disgusted than anything. "I was devastated, to say the least. I'd been planning on proposing..." He glanced at Die then shook his head. "I think what hurt the most though was that she wasn't even sorry. She blamed me for being emotionally cold."

Die found himself completely stunned. He hadn't expected anything like that Kyo was commenting about. Some part of him had figured it would be a simple case of dating for a while and someone fucking someone else, the word getting back... that sort of thing. But for Kyo to have walked in on it... for him to have been so far into the relationship that he was going to propose. It was like a blow to the face that someone would have treated his Kyo like that.

Still, oddly, he felt not a single drop of jealousy. One would have thought he'd be upset that Kyo had been looking at proposing to someone else in his life. But to Die, it didn't matter. Kyo had accepted with him and that was what mattered, not the past. At least not in that sort of manner.

He slid his hand up under Kyo's shirt and rested it against his side, the skin warm beneath his fingers. "What a fucking bitch." He shook his head a little. "So... you actually walked in on it?" Some part of him was pained that Kyo had to have seen something like that... and another part was impressed his lover wasn't in jail for strangling them both.

Kyo watched Die, watched myriad of emotions cross his face and felt his heart swelling in his chest as he realized that Die wasn't the least bit upset about the relationship but was infuriated for the way he was hurt. 

Die's hand on his skin made him sigh softly and lean in to press his forehead to Die's shoulder, humming at the question. "Yeah, right in the middle of it..." He paused for a moment then let out a laugh. "From this side of things, it was rather hilarious watching them both run out of the apartment and try to dress at the same time." He shifted then glanced up at Die. "I burned every last one of her things."

"Your bed?" Die asked, thinking of how he'd feel in that instance. Sure... he'd had people cheat on him, but never in his own fucking bed. That was lower than fuckin' low.

"Tossed it in the dumpster. That was when I moved to that place near the train station."

Die made a horrible face. "Fucking... lower than low scum. Cheating is one thing. Cheating in your lover's apartment is a whole other. And cheating in the apartment on their bed is like... the shit on the bottom of the pond that breeds the scum that floats in the water and makes the floaty shit on top."

Kyo laughed and shifted to kiss Die softly on the lips. "Thank you for that..." It felt good to have Die so vehemently take up for him even if the incident had occurred a long time ago.

Die made a soft sound in the back of his throat and then reached up to grasp Kyo's hair, lightly tugging on it as he kissed him hard on the lips. Pulling back, he wet his lips and stared right into Kyo's eyes. "I swear to you, I will never cheat on you. Ever."

Kyo felt his throat tighten a bit at Die's words and his hand came up to cup the red head's cheek. "I swear I will never cheat on you, either."

Die beamed at him and then reached for his arm, pulling it to his mouth and pressing a hard kiss to the area he had once tended to with tears streaming down his face in the dead of the night. He kissed it again and again and then licked the skin, much like Kyo had in the video. He almost wanted to know how many of those scars were over such things, but another part of him knew it didn't fucking matter. What did matter was that he'd cared for them, that he'd patched Kyo up to wander through another day, each and every time. His tongue swept over the skin again and he murmured, "I tasted your blood once... way back then... it was really an idiot move on my part given all the things I could have not known... the dangers that could have been hidden in it. But I couldn't bring myself to care. I patched you up that night and you were bleeding all the way down your arm, more than I could clean up with the few tissues I had... and I just... I didn't think about it, I just licked it off."

Kyo let out a soft sound when Die's lips pressed to his scared arm, his other hand going to thread through red locks. As Die continued to kiss and then lick the slightly sensitive skin, he found himself shifting a bit, another sound sliding past his lips. 

Die's sudden admission had him gaping at his lover, hand frozen in his hair as he processed what he'd said. "I...wow...you really just...licked it off?"

Die's cheeks darkened in something that was half shame and he pressed one more kiss to the skin before relinquishing Kyo's arm. He knew it was somehow creepy... wrong on so many levels. He'd done things in his life that he wasn't proud of, and frankly, that was one of those things. But Kyo had bared his soul, and somehow he'd felt compelled to bare his own in return. Humiliation for humiliation... or some such thing. He only hoped Kyo would recognize why he'd said it then.

"Yeah... creepy, I know." He slid his fingertips over Kyo's skin, wiping up his saliva, feeling a bit ashamed about it right then. "I know I shouldn't have. Dangerous... wrong... non-consensual." He winced at the last one. Did that make him as bad as a rapist? Had he really done low-life things like that in his life? In all honesty, it could be viewed on the same level and he damn well knew it. "I know it can't cover it... but... I'm sorry I did it while you were out cold."

Kyo shook his head, reaching up to stroke Die's cheek. "It's...not that big of a deal, Die. I'm just surprised. That's usually my department." He quirked his lips up a bit. "Besides, as long as I know it was you...I don't mind."

Die leaned into the touch, closing his eyes. "There were times... when I was really wasted... it took you so long to pass out that I already had a few too many in me..." he shook his head, "sometimes it was really hard for me to not let you know how much I cared. To wake you up and show you that I was the one sewing you up and bandaging you. That it was always me who cared for you when you were at your worst." 

Die's eyelids fluttered open and he gazed at the screen. "I never really admitted it, but it was worse when you'd actually beat yourself instead of cutting. I couldn't heal those wounds. There was nothing to doctor up. Nothing to stitch back together or bandage up. I had to leave you in your pain and it fucking hurt."

Kyo's jaw tightened as memories of the past swarmed through his head, vague images of being carried out of the dressing room of whatever venue, images of long fingers skillfully sewing his skin shut. He'd always assumed it had been medics or something, had never questioned it once.

Knowing that it was Die and thinking over it again as he considered the nights that he had left bruises rather than cuts, he realized that those nights were some of the worst. The nights that plagued him with nightmares and pain throughout, and there was nothing he could to stop it. It was shocking to think he once welcomed that pain and torment, thought he deserved it. 

"Daisuke...," he murmured quietly, turning a bit and wrapping his arms around his fiancé. "Thank you for saving me."

The use of his real name hit home like a brick to the face and Die pulled Kyo tighter against himself. Some part of him wanted to lay claim to Kyo in an entirely different fashion right then. He nearly always thought of intimacy in a fucking sort of fashion. But right then, he craved an entirely different sort that had nothing to do with arousal and everything to do with showing Kyo his heart and soul, served up with no barrier between.

He shifted them so that they were standing, making sure Kyo had his footing before he led him to the stairs and then up to their bedroom. He shut the door and drew his lover with him to the bed, gently lying him down on it and shifting over him. There was nothing sexual in the way he looked at him, the way he drew his fingers over Kyo's skin. And even when he reached for his shirt, pushing it up as if to remove it, it felt entirely different from usual.

Kyo's heart flipped in his chest at the way Die crushed him against him. He held on, needing the closeness right then as he was feeling a little raw from remembering all of his past pain. 

He was soon placed on his feet and being lead upstairs and he didn't even question it as they eventually ended up in the bedroom. 

Die laid them down and he simply reached up, running his hands over Die's arms, shivering faintly as his shirt was pushed up.

Slowly, Die removed the other's shirt and then lightly dusted his fingertips over Kyo's skin. He drew his arm up and then closed his eyes, breathing out, "I need your attention... the details of my memory... I just need you to know."

Kyo shifted a bit then let do as he pleased, watching his face. "Then tell me..."

Still keeping his eyes closed, Die drew Kyo's arm up to his lips, lightly pressing a kiss to the inside of his elbow. His fingers slid up and then paused, as if measuring the skin. "Here..." his fingertip traced a long-since-gone line across his skin, "this was the first time I ever felt the need to step in. This was the beginning of my own descent... the start of everything."

Kyo watched Die's fingers move over his skin, his eyes full of a sort of wonder. As Die spoke, he fought to remember ever cutting the skin there and yet it was only a vague memory now. "Was it...deep?"

"Deeper than the rest... enough that it wouldn't close up on its own by the time you were passed out on the floor. Not enough it required me to stitch you up. But enough that I felt the need to intervene." His fingers moved up to Kyo's wrist, tracing another track, this one more prominent, the scar still felt beneath the fingertip, raised and permanent. "The first time I ever had to stitch you up... the fuck-up job. This earned all my fear, every terror in the book. A week-long stint of war within myself. Did you need more help than I was giving? Was this still just a show or were you dying inside, and no one was doing a damn thing about it?" A single tear escaped down his cheek and he swallowed thickly. "The moment I realized maybe... just maybe... I needed to keep a better eye on what was going on."

Kyo nodded slightly then watched as Die's fingers moved to his wrist and the one cut that he had had to stop himself from making deeper. This one he remembered doing, remembered the pain behind it. Die's words and tears stabbed him straight through the heart and he wanted to apologize, beg Die for forgiveness for the pain he'd put him through. "It was...easier...to hide behind the show."

"If I knew then what I know now... things would have come out the other side a lot differently. But all I had were my own fears and assumptions. I lacked the hard evidence." He kissed the area and then turned Kyo's arm, running his fingertips over another area that no longer held the scars. "The first time I learned to do it right... I took your scars away because I sewed it up right and managed to get ahold of you often enough to keep it from scaring."

Kyo nodded slightly then looked at his arm where Die went next. "I'm still amazed that you and you alone did this...because Gods know I wasn't going to help myself...not then."

Die chose not to reply to the comment, knowing that there wasn't really a good response to it. Rather, he curled his fingers and dragged his nails down Kyo's arm across where he'd opened himself up one night. "This is the night of my first sin... the night I licked you clean without a second thought to what it could do to me or how you'd feel about it. My biggest sin."

Kyo sighed softly, reaching out to trail his hand over Die's. "And yet you did it because you cared...even if the method was...perverse."

Die pressed one more kiss to Kyo's arm and then descended on him, his hands pressing to the bed, his breath suddenly hot against Kyo's neck as he breathed there for a moment. He pressed a kiss to the underside of his jaw and then drew back so Kyo could see his eyes were still closed. It was with immense precision that Die placed his fingers on the two most prominent scars on Kyo's upper chest. He drew his fingers across the extent of them and then stopped. "The first time I was truly terrified. The first time I truly felt the agonizing pain you were letting escape... and the first time I took the razor blade from you. That night..." he paused, almost afraid to go on.

Kyo sighed softly, his arms coming up to wrap around Die once the other leaned into him. He looked up at Die's closed eyes then shivered as the other's fingers slide over his scarred flesh. He swallowed hard and followed the path of Die's fingers before quietly speaking. "Go on..."

"My second sin," Die admitted quietly. "I had already trod the dangerous road, so... why not follow it further?" He kept his eyes closed, a barrier of sorts between the admission of truth and his desire to run from his past mistakes. He took Kyo's hand and turned his own wrist over, pressing Kyo's fingertips across the skin there. "It was the final night of the tour, and no one would see me for nearly a week. And I wanted to know why... what it helped... how it felt." There were no scars left behind from what he'd done, nothing to show of his own foray into the dangerous fields of what Kyo had been doing for years by that point. "And I forced myself through five lines, each deeper than the last. I needed to know. And honestly... I still just can't understand how I wanted to."

Kyo stared at Die's face, his own slowly turning into a mask of shock as he learned of what his lover had done. His fingertips stroked over the skin of Die's wrist, relieved that there were no lasting scars. "Oh…Die...you...you hurt yourself...because of me?" Guilt sliced through him then and he turned hand, catching Die's wrist and pulling it to his lips, kissing the once abused skin.

Die opened his eyes then, forcing himself to see Kyo's reaction. He studied him for a long few moments. "I do not tell you this for guilt, Kyo. I tell you because I need you to understand that I wanted so badly to understand why you were doing it that I tried it myself. I desperately wanted to see where you were coming from. I couldn't just ask... you wouldn't have told me back then. I was... just your bandmate. Maybe, on some distant planet, your friend. I didn't have permission to touch that part of your soul... not like now."

Kyo stared up at Die then shook his head, reaching push a strand of hair form Die's face. "I know...and back then...my soul was so raw...you wouldn't have survived coming in contact with it."

"I did what I could, from where I was allowed." He gave the other a soft smile and then smirked a bit. "It's not all bad... the memories... I make it seem like hell and torture. Well..." he shrugged, "part of it was. But part of it was entirely a different beast." He shifted then, rolling down beside Kyo and sliding one thigh over Kyo's own, holding him in place gently. "I remember the first night I picked you up and carried you to the dressing room. I remember kneeling next to you for nearly an hour before you started to come to... and I remember stumbling away so you wouldn't be creeped out that it was me who carried you there."

Kyo hummed and curled against Die, finding his hand and lacing their fingers together. He chuckled softly and shook his head. "I would have just been shocked rather than creeped out..."

"Well... there's something to be happy about." He smirked a bit at him and then squeezed Kyo's fingers lightly. "There's every single time I ever kept watch on you to make sure things didn't go where I horribly thought they might. And the relief of knowing they didn't."

Kyo turned his head to look at Die, his mouth quirked up in a small smile. "What was the longest you've ever stayed?"

"Ever?" Die arched an eyebrow. "I'll work off the theory you mean before we were together... in which case... four and a half hours, give or take a few minutes. You were out cold and wouldn't respond to anything. I think it was just exhaustion. But I ended up actually taking you home that night. Inoue told me if you didn't make it home, he'd have my skin for his next suit."

Kyo blinked a little then laughed at the thought of their manager saying such a thing. "God...I can't remember that at all. To be honest, there are concerts that I've lost in the haze."

"I figured as much. You never once asked anyone how you got home. I think the most awkward part was the fact that I had to dig in your pocket for your keys. That's when I took to asking you to put your keys in the bag before going on stage. The idea of rooting around in your pockets while you were out cold was somehow the worst part of the experience." He shrugged awkwardly and then rolled on his back.

Kyo blinked a little then shifted to pillow his head on Die's shoulder. "Why? Didn't want to grope my dick accidentally?"

"There's one thing to invading someone's space to take care of them when they could be in danger. There's another to rooting around in someone's pockets when they'll never remember. It's... too personal." He shook his head. "It felt wrong."

Kyo nodded a little, smiling at his lover's thoughtfulness. "I appreciate that." He looked up at Die. "Anyone ever tell you that you're an amazing human being?"

Die blinked a bit and then ducked his head, an awkward sort of smile on his lips. "Not to my face."

Kyo grinned. "Well, you are...I don't know anyone else that would have been so selfless in taking care of me."

Die tilted his head a little and studied Kyo. "That's just it though... it was never selfless."

Kyo looked at Die, pursing his lips. "What would you call it then, love?"

"Selfish by all rights and means." Die shrugged again and stared up the ceiling. "I didn't want to lose you. I saw a man struggling to make peace with himself, struggling to stay whole, and I stepped in without permission. I selfishly put you back together and did everything I could to keep you from fully falling apart because it would have fucking killed me to lose you."

Kyo stared at Die for a moment then closed his eyes, burying his face against the other's shoulder, swallowing hard. "I'm glad you did, though...even if I wanted nothing more than to let myself fall to pieces...because if I had...I wouldn't have you here and now."

Die reached to lightly run his hand through Kyo's short hair. "Then I'm glad I did it, no matter how selfish it was."

Kyo nodded then shifted to press his lips to Die's cheek. "I love you, my Koi."

The name quirked Die's lips upward and he gently tugged the other against him. "I love you, too, Tooru... I love you in every single way you can ever imagine and probably a few dozen more."

Kyo laughed softly, wrapping his arm around Die and hugging him tightly. "Yes, well, I love you times infinity."

"You mushy little bastard," Die murmured affectionately. He pressed his lips to Kyo's ear and whispered, "I'll never tell that you do all these amazing things... except maybe once. I take liberties if we ever do go through with the wedding... my vows will be chalk full of all of this."

Kyo flushed a bit then looked at Die, reaching up to tug his hair. "Fine, you get one free pass during the wedding." He smiled softly and closed his eyes, feeling content with life right at that moment.

Die just let out a quiet grunt, leaning in and just lightly moving his lips and tongue over Kyo's neck, tracing the strong muscles there, slipping down over his collarbone and then up to his Adam's apple. His actions were still built from something that was entirely devoid of sexual intent, and it was somehow more obvious than ever before.

Kyo sighed quietly as Die began kissing his neck in such a sweet manner. He took the opportunity to lace his fingers in the red hair that he was so fond of, stroking the silky strands as he tilted his head back slightly.

Die's fingers moved to lightly stroke over the flesh that separated his fingers from Kyo's heart, the movement idle, almost as though he didn't realize he was doing it. His lips found a spot they were happy to stop at, the tendons on the left side of Kyo's neck his newest achievement.

Kyo brought his hand to rest atop Die's, letting out a soft sound as the other continued to move his mouth over his skin.

Die finally relinquished Kyo's skin and then lightly blew over the saliva-coated area, drying it. He smiled as he snuggled into the bed and Kyo's side. "I couldn't be happier that I helped save you from yourself. Otherwise this never would have happened, and I'd still be living in my own internal hell."

Kyo hummed softly, curling into Die. "We saved each other then, and I couldn't be happier either."


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

It was rare that Kyo felt like going outside the normal bounds of sexual acts by himself but something he'd seen recently had planted an idea in his head that he was eager to try out. 

He waited until one day that Die was going to be out for a while and then embarked on his deviant adventure. He started by taking a little blue pill that he'd gotten from Boss for just such an occasion and then waited for it to work. Once he started feeling the effects, he made his way into their living room and settled on the couch. He opened his pants and pulled his cock free, already semi-hard from the pill as well as the excitement of what he was about to. It didn't take him long to become fully aroused, and soon he was bucking up into his hand, groaning. 

A few moments later, he stood and faced the couch, stroking himself in a manner built to get himself off and soon he was letting out a groan as his cum spurt out onto the back of the couch. He shuddered slightly, looking down at his still hard cock. He smirked then moved to his next target, the kitchen. 

Here, he pulled out a tube of lube that he had in his pocket as well as a small bullet vibe. He slicked his cock up then palmed the vibe before going about stroking himself off again, lewd moans escaping as he did. This time when he was about to cum, he leaned forward and placed his dick right on top of the counter. He groaned loudly as he deposited his second load there, smirking at his handiwork once he was done. 

For his final act of defiance, he moved to the middle of the kitchen floor and waited for his cock to soften just the slightest bit though he knew that with the pill, it would be hard for a while. Once he could bend it a bit, he took a breath and then forced himself to start pissing, right there in the middle of the kitchen floor. He let out a sound of relief as a puddle formed in front of him, he'd been holding it a while. He finally finished up and shook off, stepping back to admire his messes before smirking and making his way upstairs to wait for Die to get home.

Die had been out for most of the morning and afternoon. He honestly hated the errands he had to run for that afternoon. The stupid bills were due, and he hadn't remembered to actually get them in the mail in time. And if there was one thing Die hated, it was late bills. Rock stars, in his opinion, did not pay their bills late.

He had, therefore, run off with his checkbook and a list of addresses to pay the actual bills. With that done, he'd made a stop by a local pet shop, taking a look at a few things he'd been meaning to, and then headed home, perhaps a bit later than he'd been meaning to.

It'd been nearly four hours since he'd left home when he finally pulled back up in the driveway and he sat there for a minute, listening to the last of the song he'd been going back over. Getting out of the car, he flicked the locks on the car, and then headed into the house. The first thing he noticed was the scent of piss. He made a little face, trying to remember if he'd been a moron at any point in the last few days. After a while, he realized that he hadn't indulged in that since the humiliating episode with Kyo nearly three weeks earlier. He sniffed again. Definitely not cat piss. "Odd," he murmured under his breath.

A few more moments passed by and he dumped his bag on the table by the door, going to lock the door and set the alarm behind himself. That much done, he headed toward the kitchen, following the scent. He stopped dead, arching his eyebrow at the amount of piss on the floor. No cat had done that. Which left wo options. One... he'd fucked up and blacked out and done some stupid shit... or two... Kyo did this. He almost wanted to laugh.

After a few more moments, he let out a snort and then gazed around the kitchen. A moment later, he noticed the white substance drying on the countertop. He tilted his head a bit and then ran his fingers through it. Cum... definitely cum. "You sneaky little shit," he muttered out. "What the hell have you been up to?" His eyes scanned the rest of the room and then he walked into the living room, going to plug in his phone and noticing the cum on the couch. He bit back a grin and then laughed softly.

"Well... okay then." He unfastened his belt and then let his fingers run over the surface of it. This was perfect... absolutely perfect. Kyo was nearly begging for it, and he'd been semi-planning something for him for weeks now. The opportunity was crystal. 

He pulled his belt free and grinned, pulling off the buckle and then heading toward the stairs. "Oh, Kyooooo~" he sang out, "where are you?" He wrapped it around his fingers once and then took the stairs two at a time. Getting to the top, he went right for the bedroom.

Kyo had managed to time things perfectly in that it was just under an hour from when he'd soiled the living room and kitchen to when Die got home. 

He had moved to the bedroom, alternately jacking off because he was still hard as hell and then trying to focus on something else, wanting to build himself back up for the inevitable moment that Die did come home and find his little treats. 

He heard his lover calling him and smirked, shifting to sit up and lean back against the pillows. "I'm here, Die..."

Die moved his hand back behind his back, trying to make it look natural as he slipped into the room. He moved toward Kyo, his eyes on the other. He slid his tongue over his lower lip and then chuckled. "Did you leave those messes in the kitchen and the living room, baby?"

Kyo gave Die as innocent a look as he could muster, though his lips were twitching at the corners. "I might have...were you surprised?"

"I was... three messes... two of them cum." He settled on the side of the bed, right up next to Kyo, still holding his hand away from him so he couldn't see the surprise he had for him himself. "Mmm... and your cock is still hard." He flicked one finger over him. "Horny today?"

Kyo chuckled lowly then groaned, jerking his hips up slightly at the touch. "I admittedly had a little help...because I didn't want the party to end before it got started." He smirked at Die, waiting on his lover to do something about his obvious horniness.

Die smirked at him and then chuckled. "You little deviant. What was it? Horny goat weed? Passion infusion?" He leaned in and breathed out the last part, remaining that close. "Viagra?"

Kyo shivered as Die breathed into his ear, his lover's close proximity really having an effect on him. "Hnn…yes, Viagra..." He shifted and squirmed, reaching down to grope at himself for a moment. "Whatcha gonna do about it?"

Die chuckled darkly. "And where... exactly... did you get such a thing, my young... virile... lovely, man?"

Kyo's tongue flicked out to run over his bottom lip before he smirked. "Where else would one get such a thing? Boss, of course..."

"Ah yes... our lovely... supplier." Die let out a laugh. "Pot and dick drugs." He snorted a bit and then reached down, grabbing his lover's cock. He gave it a few good pumps, just to get Kyo going, and then chuckled, grabbing the belt with both hands and shoving it against Kyo's throat, effectively pinning him against the wall. "Why'd you need the little blue pill, my love?"

Kyo chuckled. "Indeed." He was going to say more but then Die's hand around his dick had him moaning, his eyes closing briefly so he didn't see the belt that was soon pressed against his wind pipe. His eyes shot open and he stared at Die, more than a little shocked. "Because...I needed to be able to cum a few times..."

"I see," he murmured softly. He leaned in and flicked his tongue over the other's earlobe. "Sweetheart... you remember what you asked me for?"

Kyo swallowed with some difficulty before nodding his head, a groan slipping past his lips. "Yes..."

"It's happening," he murmured quietly. He let out a soft laugh and then pushed harder on the belt. "Today. All day. And yes... that includes tonight. All through the concert."

Kyo couldn't stop the moan that escaped him, his cock throbbing hard at the very idea. He looked at Die and brought his hands up to rest on his wrists as he pulled in a breath with some difficulty. "Hnn...and how...do you intend on carrying out your little...plan?"

"Sweetheart... any fuckin' way I want." He pulled back and snapped the belt in front of Kyo's face to try to produce a reaction from him. "You will, in fact, do as I say today. Is that clear?"

Kyo stared at Die then flinched away from the snap of the belt, a shiver going through him. He licked his lips then nodded. "Perfectly..."

"Good." He backed off, sliding the belt back through his belt loops and fastening it. "Second rule... that Viagra you took," he let out a laugh, "you're going to fuckin' regret that shit."

Kyo huffed softly, glancing down at his raging hard-on. "I might have known..." He licked his lips and shifted, grunting softly. "You're going to be a cruel bastard, aren't you?"

"Yes... in fact... that's what you signed up for, baby." He buckled up his belt and then settled down astride Kyo's legs. "Now tell me... what fantasy were you having about this? What was I going to do to you when I found your deviant little messes?"

Kyo brought his hands to rest on Die's thighs, somewhat glaring at him. "Hmm, this is really along the vein of what I was thinking…though it went more like you'd be excited by the idea and come fuck me into the mattress..."

Die grinned at him. "I am excited to do exactly that." He reached out and grabbed his hair, yanking him to the side with the short strands. "After I've tortured you."

Kyo let out a soft cry at the hair pulling. His eyes narrowed slightly as he tried to decide if he wanted to fight Die during this or not. He let it be for the moment, deciding to see where Die took it. "Mm I see..."

Die smiled and then shifted back, looking down at Kyo's cock. "How long ago did you take it?" he asked quietly.

Kyo licked his lips, flexing his hips up a bit. "Right at two hours ago..."

"Then you have... probably an hour to two hours of boner-ville to deal with." He smirked a bit and reached down to flick Kyo's cock. "Okay... you have a choice to make. I get you off right now... and for the duration of the rest of the night, you live in agony. Or... you get two random surprises throughout the night that may - or may not - help you with the blue pill that you managed to ingest."

Kyo stared at his lover and wondered where Die picked up such sadistic practices all of a sudden. He huffed out a breath and looked down at his aching cock before pursing his lips. "I choose the second choice..."

Die tilted his head, smirking when he got the response. "Excellent choice." He pushed himself up and then gestured Kyo up from the bed. "Come. Stand in front of me."

Kyo licked his lips. "We'll see..." He shifted up and stood in front of Die, staring up at him.

"Oh no, trust me, it was the better of the two deals, darling." Die cast him an exaggerated wink and then chuckled, walking around Kyo. "First... Die has such a big surprise for you." He smacked Kyo's ass. "Close your eyes and we shall proceed."

Kyo sniffed a bit, rolling his eyes at Die's wink then letting out a little yelp at the ass smack. "A surprise, huh? I'm scared to look forward to it." He closed his eyes anyway, admittedly more excited by this than he should be.

Die laughed softly, crouching down and pulling a box out from under the bed. He removed a length of jet black silken rope and crouched there, tying the first of a series of intricate knots. As soon as he had it done, he stood up and moved to Kyo. "Spread your legs, love."

Kyo sucked his bottom lip between his teeth, listening to what Die was doing. He shifted anxiously then spread his legs for Die, wondering what was coming.

Die created a little harness and then moved Kyo's leg so that he stepped into it. Moving it up his thigh, he tightened it, though not too much, and then went about doing up the knot for the other thigh as well. With that done, he brought both lengths of rope around his ass, tying another knot, and then looping it around his waist, inserting the ties through the knot he'd just made. Swooping it back down, he brought it up and under Kyo's balls, off to the right to tie on the rope around his middle, and then across and down the other side. One more tie on the bottom and the extra he used to create a slightly more intricate pattern over his hips. Settling back, he checked his work. "Any of it too tight? And you can open your eyes now."

Kyo felt Die sliding silky rope over his skin and couldn't stop the groan that escaped him. His already hard cock twitched as Die went about securing and knotting the rope harness on his body. When his lover was finished, he opened his eyes and looked down, shifting his body a bit. "No, it's not too tight....Die this is...gorgeous."

Die flushed a little. "It's not real intricate... I mean... I'm only learning, but... thank you." For a moment, embarrassed Die was present, even in the middle of his dominant display. But after a moment, he was back on track, standing up and running his hand over Kyo's hip. "You will wear this all day. If you need to use the restroom, you will let me know... and I will have to help you. Are we clear?"

Die gave a nod and then hooked a finger into the rope. "Baby... you're gonna live through hell tonight. Just so we're perfectly clear on this." He drew Kyo into the bathroom with him. "I need to piss... open my pants."

Kyo stared at Die. "Mm, is that a promise?" He chuckled lowly then followed Die into the bathroom. He looked at him for a moment then reached out, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants.

Die watched him for a few long moments. "It's a threat." He gestured. "Take my cock out and hold it."

Kyo couldn't help the shudder that slid through him. He'd wanted this sort of thing from Die for a long time now. He moved to take the other's cock out of his boxers, grasping it and holding it out towards the toilet.

Die let out a quiet groan as he started to piss. If he wasn't careful it was rather quickly going to be more difficult than he'd anticipated to urinate, though. Lightly, he pushed Kyo's hand down so even as he grew harder in his lover's hand, he was still going to manage to finish up. Closing his eyes, he murmured, "Choose your safe word... one breathe of it and we're out instantly, okay?"

Kyo felt Die growing hard as held him while he pissed and it made him more excited. He went as far as to stroke Die slightly as he was finishing up. 

At the mention of a safe word, he considered for a moment then chuckled slightly. "Rinkaku."

Die gave him an incredulous look and then snorted. "Fine." After a moment, he reached out and removed Kyo's hand from his dick, tucking it back in his pants. "Flush and wash your hands." He moved to wash his own as well and then stood back to observe.

Kyo glanced at Die then did as he was told, flushing the toilet and going to wash his hands. He was feeling a little on edge by these simple commands, things seemed to be going too easy at the moment.

Die waited until he was done and then tucked one finger in his rope binding again, leading him out of the bathroom and down the stairs to the living room. "Now clean your fucking cum up before the cats lick it or something equally disgusting."

Kyo had no choice but to follow his lover down the stairs and into the living room. He glanced at the cum then raised an eyebrow. "How am I supposed to clean it up?"

Die stared at him for a long moment. "Careful what you ask me. Use this," he tapped his lover's head lightly, "or else I'll decide what you get to use and you won't like it."

Kyo blinked at Die then scowled at him slightly before turning to go into the kitchen. He tore off a couple of paper towels and wet them before returning to the living room. He moved to the couch, bending over to start scrubbing up his mess, the ropes pulling and sliding along his ass and cock as he did, causing him to gasp lowly.

Die watched him clean it up with a smirk on his face. "Be glad you did that quickly... I was going to make you use your mouth on your hours old cum. Do you have any idea what hours old cum tastes like?"

Kyo glanced back at Die then snorted, wiping up the last of it. "I don't ever want to know, thanks..." He wrinkled his nose at the very thought because cold, slimy cum, even if it was his own, sounded positively repulsive.

"Now the kitchen counter," Die instructed, his voice deceptively quiet.

The rope bound vocalist moved into the kitchen and repeated the process of cleaning up his mess, using disinfecting spray on the counter.

Once Die was satisfied the jizz was cleaned, he gestured at the floor. "And this? Really?" He leaned in and chuckled darkly in Kyo's ear, his hands holding tight on the ropes. He ground his hips against Kyo's ass, showing him how hard he was just then. "How did you feel doing it?"

Kyo looked at the puddle of piss on the floor then groaned as Die pressed against him. He pushed back against his lover's cock, enjoying the feel of it right then given that his hadn't softened a bit during this whole time. 

He took a breath and licked his lips before replying. "Mm, I was mostly hard during the whole time and all I could think about was you coming home to find it...I almost jizzed again just thinking about it."

Die let out a possessive little sound as arousal swam through his system. "Dirty fuckin' singer that you are." He nipped at Kyo's shoulder and then lightly pushed him. "Down on your knees. I'll get the mop."

Kyo groaned then knelt on the floor, making sure not to get into the mess. While Die was getting the mop, he reached down, groping at his crotch for a moment, needing desperately to relieve the ache there.

Die came back in and put the bucket over Kyo's head. "I saw that." He continued onward to the kitchen and went about putting the mop in the sink, carefully putting some soap in the water. He wrung it out and brought it back. "Fix it."

"Oi..." Kyo protested when Die put the bucket on his head then pushed it off and stared at the mop. "From this position?"

"I didn't tell you to remove that. Some might have thought you'd be use to a bucket on your head... given your past." He gave him a smirk and then leaned down. "Mr. Rape Me bucket... what the hell was that ever about anyway?" He pushed the mop into his hands. "Yes from there, now do it."

Kyo huffed at Die, shaking his head. "I don't even know myself..." He took the mop and awkwardly started mopping up the piss, scooting back on his knees to get all of it before glancing up at Die. "Will that suit you, Sir?"

Die bopped Kyo on the nose. "No sirs for me... I don't like it." He took the mop and went about cleaning it out and then wringing it again. He took bleach and some paper towels and passed them to Kyo. "Just a bit."

Kyo rubbed his nose, laughing a little. "Good because I don't think I could remember to keep it up." He grabbed the bleach and sprayed it on the floor then wiped it up really well. He made one more pass with a bit more bleach then sat back. "Yes?"

"Yes. Get up and wash your hands. No bleach hands for you." He mussed Kyo's hair and then stepped back, waiting.

Kyo stood up and washed his hands well then turned and leaned against the counter, his cock standing out prominently between the ropes.

Die regarded him for a few moments before turning and walking away. "Come."

Kyo followed along behind Die, his mind swirling with the possibilities of how things could go, though now he wished he hadn't had the Viagra because his cock was starting to hurt.

Die made his way back to the bedroom and then settled down on the bed, pushing himself back on the bed far enough Kyo could straddle him. "Straddle me."

Kyo moved into the bedroom with Die and waited while he got settled on the bed. At his command, Kyo walked over to the bed and straddled his lover's waist, holding onto his shoulders for balance.

Die pulled Kyo closer to himself and then leaned in, nipping and nuzzling at Kyo's neck. "Your dick just straining out... so fuckin hard... it's driving me mad with desire," he admitted quietly.

Kyo groaned softly, one hand going to bury itself in Die's hair. "Hnng, it almost hurts it's so hard..," he murmured, his voice almost pleading.

"I know, baby... I know." He kissed his shoulder. "You didn't ask for anything, so that's going to get you somewhere." With a chuckle, he rolled them over so that Kyo was beneath him. He leaned down and sucked on his nipple harshly, his hand wrapping around Kyo's shaft and starting to stroke.

Kyo hummed softly, making a note of that. He shifted once he was under Die then let out a loud moan, his hips bucking up harshly into Die's hand. "Oh fuck!"

"That's right... be loud for me, baby," Die purred out, lapping at the nipple a moment later and then squeezing his cock harshly.

Kyo's hand came up to claw at Die's back through his shirt, his hips thrusting almost wildly. "Fuck! Die!"

"God, you fuckin' need this, don't you, love?" He shifted himself down and licked over the head of Kyo's cock before sucking on the tip, jerking the rest of his shaft off quickly.

"I…oh God…yes!" Kyo cried out, grappling at the bed with one hand, the other sliding up to tangle in Die's hair, tugging almost harshly. "I…can't...gonna cum...," he panted out, so close to the edge already.

Die sucked up off of him and then murmured, "You have permission," before sliding his cock back into his mouth, his hand still moving over his length.

Die's words were all it took for Kyo to fly off the edge. He gave a loud scream of Die's name as his hips snapped up and his orgasm slammed hard into him, copious amounts of cum spurting down Die's throat.

Die took every ounce of it before leaning back and swallowing. He cleared his throat and reached to rub lightly at Kyo's lower abdomen. "Feeling any better?"

Kyo slumped back down on the bed once he'd emptied his load, his breath coming in harsh pants. "For the moment…Gods..."

Die simply smirked at him, still rubbing the area in a soothing sort of manner. "Had you ever taken something like Viagra before this?"

It took Kyo a few minutes to come to himself again, his brain swimming after cumming so hard. He looked up at Die and shook his head. "No, never really needed to…y'know?"

"But you just decided to use it to surprise me today? Tell me... what were you going to do?"

"Well, I took it initially because I wanted to leave you those little messes downstairs and then really, after that...I was looking forward to some good, long-lasting fucking."

Die reached to cup his cheek. "Baby... if you ever desire me in a certain way... you just have to tell me. Period." He gave him a smile and then settled back, slipping right back into his dominant role with a blink of his eyelids. The sultry eyes came back and he pulled lightly on Kyo's bindings. "Let's get you ready for tonight."

Kyo smiled a little. "I know...but I like surprising you." He licked his lips the looked at Die, finding that he loved the glint in his lover's eyes right now. "Mm and how do you propose we do that?"

"Get you dressed and your makeup on... and all that good shit." He reached to lightly flick his finger over Kyo's cock. "This is gonna be trapped... and if you're lucky, it will be less... hard... by the time you go on stage. Otherwise, you get to go on with a boner."

Kyo twitched at the flick to his cock, which was still hard, the tip slightly red. "It wouldn't be the first time..." He stood up and waited for Die to lead the way, his mind going over the idea of being on stage while he had the rope bindings on. "Hmm...won't be able to take off my shirt..."

Die's lips twitched a bit. "Oh no... you will. And if your pants get low enough to show it, then you explain it away however you need to for the interviewers. But you will take your shirt off."

Kyo blinked slightly then huffed, looking down to see where it hit. This was going be...interesting. "Very well..."

Die let out a little laugh and then led Kyo to the dresser. "I get to pick your outfit."

Kyo huffed a little. "You do, do you? Well, please make it somewhat practical..."

Die gave him a very clear bitch-please look before snorting. He opened Kyo's drawer and began rooting through it, muttering incoherent things under his breath as he went along. After a while, he finally pulled out a pair of leather pants and handed them back to Kyo.

Kyo raised an eyebrow at Die's attitude, almost groaning a little. His lover was in a mood and carrying it out well. After a few moments of listening to Die muttering at his clothes, he snorted. "You could buy me some new ones if you don't like them..." He took the leather pants and stared at them. "Not even sure these fit...," he grumbled, stepping back to try them on.

"I bet they do," Die murmured. "And I just might because damn it... I got a massive boner for you in some of the old outfits."

Kyo got the pants on and buckled them up, shifting around a bit with the ropes then stepping back. "Does that work for you?"

Die leaned against the dresser and watched as Kyo went about getting the pants on. He smirked and then nodded. "Oh yes... yes it does. Turn around."

Kyo did as he was bid, turning his back to Die, arms out.

"Oh yeah... what a lovely view. I've missed that one." He grabbed Kyo's ass and then moved to shove the pants he'd moved around back in the drawer.

Kyo grunted softly, giving his hips a little wiggle. "The ropes are just peeking over the top."

"Mmmhmm... and it'll be partly dark and they're black, so... maybe it'll look like embellishments to the pants. If not... well..." he smirked, "then we'll have shown the world something."

"True...I can see you're not worried..."

"Damn right I'm not. You can sweet-talk your way out of anything. You always have." He pulled on a belt loop this time, leading Kyo to the closet and opening it to start looking through shirts. "Something button-up I think... so you can unbutton it and thrill us all."

Kyo huffed. "Doesn't mean I have to like doing it..." He let Die lead him along to the closet and stared at his shirts. After a minute, he reached in a pointed to a couple of black button-ups. "Those are nice..."

Die pulled out one that had a few pleats in the front and held it out to him. "I think I like that one. No necklaces today, I want to focus on your structure, not your bling." He offered a snort at his choice of words. Leading the way back to the drawers, he gave Kyo a black skull ring and a single leather strip bracelet.

Kyo really had no choice in the matter and simply nodded, going along with Die to put on his jewelry. After that was done, he shifted a bit and readjusted his cock which was bowing out the front of his pants.

Die watched the other adjust his cock, a huge grin on his face. "God I hope that stays and I hope someone backstage says something about it." He leaned in close and murmured, "If someone points it out, I'll blow you after the show. Right in the hallway. No cheating or I'll find out."

Kyo groaned at the very idea of getting post-show head and right then, he prayed someone would point it out. "Deal..."

"That's more like it," Die returned, taking Kyo's hand this time and delicately leading him into the bathroom. "Up on the counter."

Kyo gave Die's hand a squeeze then moved to sit on the counter, situation himself and getting comfortable.

Die carefully went about styling Kyo's hair, using a bit of mousse and then spiking bits of it up. He applied some hairspray to keep it and then moved to spritzing his lover with the cologne he so adored him to use. With that done, he moisturized Kyo's face and hands and then even his feet after washing them with a washcloth.

Kyo sat and allowed Die to do all of the styling he wanted, smiling a little at the care his lover was taking to make him look just so. After his hands, feet and faced were moisturized, he took a moment to stretch. "I should let you be in charge more often..."

"You like the care of it, buttercup?" He was intentionally overusing the cute names, seeing how far it would press Kyo if he just kept it up all the time. But really, it was starting to amuse him far more than anything else. He pulled out Kyo's makeup bag and began to root through it. "Christ, Kyo... we need to get rid of some of this shit and get new. How long have you had this?" he held up a mangled-looking eyeliner.

Kyo wrinkled his nose at the name "buttercup", shaking his head at it. "I do..." He watched Die get into his long abused make-up bag and snorted. "I dunno...since...a while?"

"Let's say that they changed the packaging on this like five years ago." He shook his head. "Seriously, it gets gunky after a while." He tossed it in the trash and then rooted around, tossing out about five other things. "Gross." He laid out what was left and tilted his head a bit. "Well, you are in luck that I bought a new eyeliner pencil and an extra of white eyeshadow. Those I can replace right now." He pulled open a drawer and put them out. "No point in skipping on the buy one get one when it happens, right?"

Kyo stared at his lover a bit incredulously and tried to think back to when he'd used his own makeup. It had been quite a while because at all photoshoots, he directed but let them apply it for him. "I see...well...thank you honey for taking care of that for me."

Die chuckled. "Picky, I know. But it gets greasy and disgusting."

Kyo shrugged. "Yeah, I know...I just never pay attention."

"Someone has to or you put that shit on and your eyeballs die." Die shrugged a bit, going about pulling out things. "What sort of feeling are we going for here?"

Kyo snorted then shrugged. "I dunno, something different but not too heavy..."

"Define your version of heavy." Die arched an eyebrow. "Mr. I dressed like a peeling zombie thing."

"Just, do up my eyes in an interesting fashion....how about that?"

Die shrugged a little and then murmured, "Close your eyes." He leaned over and opened the black and the white eyeshadows along with the eyeliner pencil, throwing away the sealing wrappers. He selected Kyo's brushes and nearly praised him for having the right ones for the job, but didn't. After a moment, he was working on the eyeliner first, heavy-handed because it was - after all - stage makeup.

Kyo shifted and closed his eyes, letting Die carry on with getting his make-up done. He could feel his lover's hands on his face, doing what was probably an excellent job and it made him smile a bit.

Die moved beyond the first phases, smoothing out the eyeliner and then adding the shadow. He worked carefully down onto Kyo's cheek, adding an eye that eerily blended into looking like his own eye was displaced when his real one was closed. When he finished up, he murmured, "Stay. Finishing spray. Brace for it." He knew Kyo was used to the stink and the tack of it until it dried, but it was still nice to get warning.

Kyo could feel most of what Die was doing but when he felt the pencil and brushes move to under his eyes, he was a bit perplexed. Still, he remained still and when Die warned him of the spray, he took a breath to hold, not wanted to breathe it in.

Die used the finishing spray as quickly and gently as possible. After a few moments, he picked up a paper off the shelf and used it to fan Kyo's face so it would dry faster. "You can breathe again, sweet pea."

The spray made Kyo's face twitch and he almost reached up to scratch at it but stopped himself. He let out the breath he was holding and opened his eyes to look at Die. "How many more cutesy nicknames are you going to use tonight?"

"About four hundred more. It's part of the punishment." He laughed softly and then shrugged, putting away the makeup, then reaching for his own bag, just doing a quick simple ring of eyeliner and a brush of shadow. He didn't bother spraying it on, never sweating profusely as other members of the band.

Kyo sighed and turned to look in the mirror at what Die had done to his face. He stared at for a while, mouth slightly open. "I'm...impressed."

"Close this eye," he pointed, "and look at it that way. It's fuckin' sweet."

Kyo closed the indicated eye and looked at it, smirking as he tilted his head this way and that. "Nice...you can do my makeup from now on..."

Die laughed. "Mmm... not as good as the girls are... or you for that matter, but I try." He smiled and then stood back. "Still hard?"

Kyo chuckled softly then glanced down. He'd honestly forgotten about his raging erection for the moment that Die was fixing him up but one look confirmed that it was still there, if not wilted some. "Mostly, yeah..."

"Good. And there it shall be. We are T minus roughly eighty minutes. And I need to dress and then we're on the way." Die headed out of the bathroom, rushing to get to the closet and change his clothing into what he was wearing for the evening.

Kyo hummed then went to slip his shirt on before gathering up his bag, putting in a few necessities into it that he took to every show, including super strong pain killers, just in case.

Die was quick, almost amazingly so. When he was done, he gave himself one spritz of his cologne and then crooked his finger. "Okay. I want you to remember you are mine tonight. Period. Do not wander off without my permission. Do not do things without my okay. Understood?"

Kyo watched as Die readied himself, amazed at his speed. Die laid out the rules for the evening and he nodded. "Understood..."

Die stopped at the front door, giving Kyo a pair of boots and then kneeling to put his own on. Once he was done, he stood up and waited on Kyo to stand as well before reaching out and lightly grasping his jaw. "Mine."

Kyo hooked his bag over his shoulder and headed for the door, slipping his boots on and lacing them properly. He stood and Die grasped his jaw, making him gaze into his lover's eyes. "Always and forever."

Die wetted his lips and then leaned in, kissing his lips lightly before letting him go. "Right then, off we go."

Kyo returned the kiss then followed Die out, his stomach bubbling with excitement for the way the evening would go.

Die unlocked the car and got in, waiting on Kyo as well before pulling out and heading toward the venue, anticipation boiling in his veins like it always did. He was just glad they were local tonight. It made things easier.

Kyo rested on the way to the venue, retreating into his own mind and getting into the right mood, even as his current play with Die was overriding mostly everything.

Die didn't say anything at all, not wanting to pull Kyo out of the right mood for the show. He'd re-assert his dominance later, when the moment called for it. Until then, they were in work-zone and he let it be that way for a reason.

Kyo was grateful for Die's understanding as he shifted into his usual quiet mode. When they were almost to the venue, he opened his eyes again and looked over at Die, smirking a little. "This should be fun," he murmured quietly.

Die's lips quirked up. "Always is. And it will be more so, given... certain things, I'm sure."

Kyo chuckled lowly. "Indeed...."

Die turned into the back lot of the venue, went through security by rolling down his window and arching an eyebrow, no words exchanged. Once inside, he found a spot next to Shinya's car and cut the engine.

Kyo watched as Die went through security with no issues then gathered up his bag once they'd parked. He turned to look at Die, his eyes questioning. "Now what? It isn't time for sound check yet..."

"Just... let's get inside and then we'll see how we're set up tonight."

"After you then." Kyo said as he shifted to exit the car, grunting a little when his ropes tightened around his cock some.

Die smirked. "Are they pulling, baby?"

Kyo huffed at Die. "A bit...just when I stood up...why? Is that your evil plan? To keep friction on my cock all night?"

"Something like that," he returned. "You'd be surprised how helpful the Internet is on that sort of thing." Leading the way, Die opened the back door and ushered Kyo in in front of him.

Kyo eyed Die for a minute then shook his head. "You're too crafty for your own good, Die." He stepped through the door, offering the usual greetings to the staff milling around as he made his way down the hall.

"Truer words..." Die muttered as he headed down the hallway after him.

Kyo found their designated dressing rooms and headed in, setting his bag down then looking at Die. They were alone for the moment though he could hear Kaoru's guitar playing from the direction of the stage.

Die glanced toward the stage area, hearing Kaoru. "Fuck. Uh... you're allowed to leave for sound check if they ask about it. Otherwise, stay here." He flashed a grin at him and then headed out the door.

Kyo snorted and waited for Die to leave before going over to a corner of the room and laying out the black, yoga-like mat he had rolled up in his bag. He removed his boots then settled on the mat cross-legged, hands pressed together and eyes closed.

Die made quick work of getting to the stage, taking his guitar from Kuroo and apologizing for apparently being late to the party.

Kaoru glanced up at the other, smirking at him a bit. "Late?"

"Shut up... I'm never late," Die teased in return, shooting Kaoru a slightly dirty look.

Toshiya snickered from in front of the stage. "Don't worry Die, Kaoru just wanted to get an early start. You're not late." He grinned at the redhead then turned to wink at his lover.

Die rolled his eyes. "Fancy that." With that, he calmed down and slid into work mode, instantly running through the required parts of tuning in their guitars and the bass and then allowing Shinya to do his drums. And then came the run through of the first minute of two different songs to make sure things switched up correctly.

While the rest of the band were going through their runs, Kyo was meditating in the dressing room. Well, he had meant to be meditating but now it had turned into more of a nap instead, his body finally relaxing just enough.

Once Die was done, he stood back and handed his guitar over to Kuroo. Pulling himself off the stage, he headed back towards the dressing room. Slipping inside, he arched an eyebrow at Kyo's hunched over form, being really, really quiet as he went to sit down.

Kyo did not stir as Die re-entered the room except to wobble on the spot slightly as if he might slump over at any minute.

Die crossed one leg over the other and sat there, just watching Kyo, wondering if he was meditating or asleep, an amused little smirk on his face.

Kyo jerked slightly and that woke him up with a snort, causing him to raise his head and look around a little bleary eyed. He caught sight of Die and looked faintly embarrassed. "How long have you been there?"

"Five minutes? Were you sleeping?" Die's lips quirked up a bit.

Kyo coughed a bit and stood, scrunching his face up as everything shifted around a bit. "N-no...of course not. I was meditating." He turned his back on Die to get a bottle of water and to hide the guilty look on his face.

"Mmhmm... sure." He tilted his head at Kyo and then quietly commanded, "Come here."

Kyo just sniffed and moved to stand in front of Die, peering at him.

"What's going on? You getting sick again?" Die ran a hand over his cheek, his eyes filled with concern. "Remember... there is no lying today."

Kyo leaned into Die's touch, smiling softly. "Nah, I think I've just about jizzed my brains out today...that, and I didn't sleep well last night."

Die ran his hands through Kyo's short hair, messing it a bit from how he'd styled it. "Mmm… well... as long as that's all it is."

Kyo nodded then look up at Die's hands in his hair. "You're mussing it up after all that work..."

"Hush... it's mine to mess up." He gave Kyo a grin and then a harsh tug he knew would go straight to his cock.

The vocalist snorted slightly then bite his lip hard, a low moan escaping him as Die tugged his hair just so. "Fuck..."

Die smirked at the other and then cupped his cheek, pulling him in and kissing him gently, extending the kiss further than he usually ever dared when they weren't heading toward sex. His tongue slid along the other's lower lip and then dipped inside.

Kyo hesitated to kiss back, given where they were, but Die's tongue soon gave him no choice. He shifted against his lover, the ropes tugging and pulling at his sensitive cock, pulling a moan from his lips.

After a few more moments, Die let him go and then smiled at him. "It's time for your sound check, love."

Kyo bit at Die's lip as the other pulled back long before he was ready for him to. He nodded and went to grab his water before nodding towards the door. "Shall we then? Or are you going to rest now?"

"You go. I'll sit back here. I've already done sound check." Die settled down on the couch and crossed one slim leg over the other with a smirk.

Kyo nodded and headed for the stage, going to his mic. He did a few vocal warmups then ran through the sound check, making notes on little things he wanted to change before going through it again.

Once Kyo had left the room, Die took the opportunity to get a little nap in of his own. He figured if they were going to end up fucking tonight after the show, he needed his energy and that meant a nap before so he'd get a bigger post-concert high later.

Kyo finished up his sound check then discussed the sound of his mic with the techs for a bit before finally heading back to the dressing room. He smirked when he saw Die sleeping, moving to sit beside him. "Hey sleeping beauty..."

Die snorted himself awake when Kyo sat down beside him, talking. For a moment, he stared at him blearily and then yawned. "Mmm ... hey yourself."

Kyo chuckled and leaned back, listening to the bustle of the rest of the band and staff getting ready. All too soon, they'd be on stage and he'd be worrying about his ropes showing as well as the erection that was threatening to pop up at any moment.

Die sat back and sniffed a little. "Get two bottles of water."

Kyo blinked a little then did as asked, going to retrieve two bottles of water from the mini-fridge then bringing them back to Die.

Die took one from him and gestured at the other. "Drink it."

Kyo looked at the water then to Die. "Like...all of it?"

"All of it." Die opened his own and started to sip at it.

Kyo pursed his lips, not relishing the thought of having a completely full bladder during the show. However, he was under Die's command right then and so he opened the bottle and started drinking. He got about a third way into it the pulled it away, glancing at Die then around the room. "You're evil."

"I am, in fact... very evil." He let out a soft laugh. "On the plus side, if you piss yourself, no one will ever know in the leather pants. So... in a way, I'm also nice."

Kyo wrinkled his nose then went back at the water, trying to make it look as though he were just really thirsty. "If I piss myself, it'll run into my boots!"

"I'll pay to clean them." Die shrugged a little. "Or you could pull it out and make it fuckin' rain on the front row like that dude in America did."

Kyo snorted. "I'd rather not get arrested or some shit." He sighed a little and finally finished off the water before leaning back against the couch.

Die chuckled. "Okay, I'll give you one freebie. If you go now... somewhere you're not supposed to... then maybe the pressure won't be so bad later."

Kyo considered Die's proposal then nodded. "Okay. Where then?"

Die gestured. "Anywhere in here."

Kyo looked around the room and frowned. He'd hoped to find something like a plant he could "water" but there was no such thing. Finally, he spotted a bucket in the corner and pointed it out. "What about that then?"

"Completely up to you, love." He crossed one leg over the other to hide his steadily growing arousal.

Kyo bit his lip, not exactly comfortable with the idea of getting caught pissing somewhere. He considered the bucket for a bit then finally stood and moved towards it.

Die stood then, moving to the door and holding the handle so that anyone would have to yank hard against his own force to open the door.

Kyo took the bucket and moved it away from the wall, turning so that Die could see him. He undid his pants and pulled his length free, groaning a little at his own touch. He shifted and aimed for the bucket then started to go, his piss hissing out and spattering a bit loudly in the bucket.

Die chuckled when the other started to urinate into the bucket. "Mmm... that's right, baby... just fuckin' do it."

Kyo grunted and pushed his piss out harder, trying to get as much out as he possibly could.

Die reached down to blatantly grope himself and then let himself go. "Seriously dude... you already had to piss that much?"

Kyo shrugged a little as he finished up, shaking his dick off then tucking himself away. "I was going to go before the show started..."

Die wetted his lips a little bit. "Now pick it up. We don't leave our messes for other people to clean up."

Kyo nodded and grabbed the bucket, looking at it then at Die. "And what are we gonna do with said mess?"

"Janitor closet is across the hallway. Just empty and rinse it there." He reached out to gently run his hands over Kyo's arms. "Gorgeous."

Kyo licked his lips then nodded before turning to look at Die, smirking a bit. "You're having a lot of fun, aren't you?"

Die gave him a suggestive look and then shrugged slightly.

Kyo just chuckled and slipped out into the hallway and into the janitor's closet. He took care of the bucket quickly then washed his hands well before rejoining Die. "Nearly show time..."

Die stood on the watch for Kyo, making sure no one came by to see what he was doing. When he was done, he patted his shoulder. "Good."

Kyo nodded then looked up at Die. "So...any rules before I get on stage and get caught up in the music?"

"When you come back off stage, you are to wait on me. Do not touch yourself. Do not go further than twenty steps past the curtain. That's the rules."

"Understood." He sniffed a bit then heard Kaoru calling them together. "Okay, let's do this then..."

Die shifted forward and grasped Kyo's hips, pushing him against the wall. Nimble fingers quickly found Kyo's cock through the material of his pants and began to massage him back into arousal. "This is your torture for the night, sweetheart. Just a taste of how cruel I can... and will... be."

Kyo gasped at being pushed against the wall and groped. He bit his lip and bucked into Die's hand, unable to help it with how sensitive he was still feeling. "A-ah...fuck Die..."

The guitarist continued until he managed to get him mostly hard. Pulling back, he smirked at him and then opened the door. "After you."

Kyo groaned as his cock grew under Die's touch. When his lover pulled away, the front of his pants were tented in an almost obvious manner. "You wicked man…" He stepped out and headed down the hall to join up with the others, thankful for the shadows at the moment.

"So wicked," he murmured to the other before they arrived where the others were at. He straightened his outfit and was, for once, glad his dick didn't insist on poking outward when hard most of the time. His boxer briefs and jeans kept it in place.

Kaoru glanced up as they came in, tilting his head a little and then letting out a half laugh. "You little perverts," he muttered before holding out his hand toward the center of the forming circle. "Are we ready?"

Kyo flipped Kaoru the bird then stuck his hand in the middle, nodding at the question. "Ready..." 

Toshiya and Shinya added their hands, the bassist shifting close to Kaoru for a split second before leaning away as if nothing had happened.

Die put his hand in on top and smirked at the lot of them, shaking his head a little bit.

Kaoru blatantly hip-checked Toshiya and then snorted a bit, counting lowly under his breath, "One, two, three!" In the next moment, all of them let out their usual cheer and raised their hands up.

Kyo caught Kaoru and Toshiya's actions, smiling a bit to himself before doing the cheer then stepping back. He was handed his in-ears and got them situated before moving to the edge of the stairs.

Die accepted one of his in-ears and then waved the other one off, not comfortable with both at once tonight. He wetted his lips a bit and then went to the curtain, waiting on the signal. When it came, he watched Shinya go out and then he headed out second, waving to the crowd as he headed across the stage.

Kyo awaited his own cue then stepped out onto the stage, trying his best to ignore his obvious boner at the moment. He swept his eyes over the crowd then launched into the first song with enthusiasm.

Die simply waited on the cue from Shinya and then started in on the first song. Time slipped past and they headed into the second and then third songs, Die's excitement ramping up as each song passed them by.

By the time they were midway through the concert, Kyo was struggling with two things. First, his cock was so hard it hurt. Second, his bladder was full, and he was starting to feel a bit desperate. 

There was a small break in between songs, and he took that moment to remove his shirt as well as get a much needed drink, even though it would add to his full bladder. He glanced down at his torso and saw the very edge of the rope sticking out and snorted lightly to himself. At least Die would be amused at that. 

Turning back and standing on his box, he went into the next song, spending a good bit of it hunched over and growling into the mic.

Die chanced watching Kyo for a few seconds in between songs. He watched the shirt come off, saw the rope, and then watched the subtle things in his lover's actions that told he had to piss. He grinned a bit and then turned around with a water bottle he'd been sipping out of and tossed it out into the crowd. Not something he usually did so early, but some of them looked a bit worse for the wear.

Kyo saw Die toss his water bottle out to the crowd and had to smile, though he hid it behind his mic. A few more songs in, and they were almost to the encore; Kyo was desperately hoping Die would allow him to relieve himself during that break, because he found himself squirming more and more and having to hide it as wild motions with the song.

They worked themselves up to the break before the encore, and Die nearly forgot to give his guitar to Kuroo before ducking off stage.

Kyo very nearly ran off the stage when it was time for the break. He was both aroused and in pain at the same time, an interesting combination to be sure. He hurriedly found Die just off-stage and walked up to him. In a low voice, he murmured. "Die, I have to piss so bad..."

Die leaned against the wall, waiting on Kyo. When he came to him, he smirked. "How bad, baby?"

Kyo looked at him and for the first time in a long time, he looked like he was about to start begging. "Painfully so...like...I can't even think straight." He shifted on the spot a few times, clenching and unclenching his fists.

"And you're damn gorgeous like this," Die returned quietly. "Now go take a piss. Hurry. And no taking care of the other problem."

Kyo huffed softly and then all but ran to the toilet, nearly plowing Kaoru over. He got into a stall and struggled to get his pants open, his cock already leaking a bit. He finally managed to get himself free and shifted into an awkward stance, trying to aim with his cock being hard. It took only seconds before he started going, a loud groan leaving his lips as relief crashed into him. He pissed for what felt like hours before finally feeling it tapering off. He cleaned up and washed his hands, taking a moment to re-spike his hair before heading back out and flopping down onto a chair, looking up at Die. "Thank you..."

Die waited until Kyo came back. Part of him wished he'd gone after him, but honestly, he didn't think his own libido could take much more before he attacked the other, and watching him damn near piss himself would certainly send him over the edge of sanity. When Kyo spoke up, he smiled a bit and patted his leg. "Consider it your one favor."

Kyo bowed his head then leaned back closing his eyes. Not caring at the moment, he reached out and found Die's hand, squeezing it hard. "For your information, I was leaking by the time I got to the toilet."

Die let out a little groan. "Should have kept you around a few more moments."

Kyo chuckled lowly. "You'd have liked that, wouldn't you? For me to piss myself?"

"Mm... maybe so," he admitted quietly before the other members began to come back to their area. "Okay... well... back on stage we go then." Die stood up and offered Kyo a hand.

Kyo smirked a little at Die's admission, turned on by the sheer fact that it would please Die so much. He reached out and took his lover's hand, pulling himself to his feet.

Die let go of Kyo's hand once he was up and smiled happily as he headed back out on stage first. He took his guitar from Kuroo and shooed the other off for his break. He had half a song to do what he needed, and then he had to be back.

Kyo walked back out on stage and ripped into the next song with great intensity, pouring all of his built up sexual frustration into it. By the time it was finished, he was straining against his pants, and it was all he could do not to reach down and grope himself. 

As they went into the last song of the evening, he gave it his all and then some.

Die kept glancing over, almost hoping Kyo would eventually touch himself. Even just a fleeting moment. Anything to get him off a bit more.

As if he could sense what Die wanted him to do, at an appropriate part during the song, he snaked his hand down between his legs then scratched his nails up his abdomen. He groaned/growled into the mic, almost smirking as the fans went crazy

Die wetted his lips and then threw himself into the rest of the song, smirking horribly at the fact that Kyo had just lewdly grabbed himself where the fans could see. That turned him on something awful for a myriad of reasons.

The song ended and with it, the show. Kyo gave the crowd a wave then hopped off his box and made his way off-stage, handing off his in-ears and accepting the cool towel he was given. He stopped in the hallway and waited for Die.

Die tossed out picks and whatnot, even a few more bottles of water, handing off the rest of his beer to an older dude in the front row. He snickered a bit as he wandered off stage, hunting for Kyo.

Kyo watched Die come off stage and called out to him. "Over here..."

Die headed right for Kyo and immediately, he grabbed the other by a belt loop. He ran one hand over Kyo's erection. "Too bad no one noticed and commented, baby... You're just gonna have to suffer."

Kyo damn near whimpered when Die told him he was going to suffer. He bit his lip then gestured to the still noisy crowd. "They noticed..."

The laugh that came out of Die's mouth was utterly hysteric. He grabbed Kyo's hand and tugged him off toward the dressing rooms. "I said other members and just because we thank the members of aknot for things does not mean they are one of the members."

Kyo growled a little and as soon as they were alone again, he crossed his arms and leveled Die with a heated gaze. "Is that so? Are you not the one that said aknot members are the 6th member of Dir en grey?"

Die stood there for a moment, completely floored that Kyo was tossing his own words back at him. He wanted to cave in some ways, just because he wanted to suck Kyo's dick. But on the other hand, he needed to prove he was in charge. "Who cares what I've said in the past," he returned, "what I meant was Toshiya, Shinya, or Kaoru. Period. You just get to suffer, so touch shit."

Kyo felt very well like throwing a tantrum right then. He turned and sat down on the couch, jaw clenched a bit as his cock shifted around inside the leather pants, adding to his suffering.

Die watched Kyo for a moment, picking up his bag. "You only have to say one word, you know."

Kyo looked at Die then snorted. "I refuse." He wouldn't back down, not now, not over something like a boner.

Quirking an eyebrow, Die shrugged. "Your torture then, baby." With that, he was off toward the door. "Get your bag. We're going home. Fuck after-parties."

Kyo huffed and stood, going to collect his things. He bid everyone good night then followed after Die.

Leading the way to the car, Die unlocked it and then plopped into the driver's seat, turning on the car and waiting on Kyo to get situated.

Kyo put his bag in the backseat then got into the car as well, buckling up then leaning back.

Die licked his lips a bit and then watched Kyo buckle up. He pulled out and then headed to the exit, rolling down the window to show who was leaving, before rolling it back up and exiting. Once they were on the move, away from the venue, he spoke, his voice full of amusement. "Take your cock out."

Kyo looked at Die then shifted a bit, unbuckling his pants and unzipping them, freeing his cock from their confines with a moan. He was so hard, he was oozing pre-cum.

Die glanced over at him and then back at the road. "You have my permission to touch yourself, but you are not allowed to cum."

Kyo nodded and immediately started jerking himself off, groaning out of sheer relief. Soon, he was bucking into his hand, his cock rigid as ever. "Fuck..."

"Tell me how you're enjoying yourself. I need to focus on the road so we don't die here," he murmured.

Kyo gave a low groan then slowed down, shifting back some. "It feels amazing to be able to touch it. I'm so fucking hard. I feel like I'll cum buckets when you do let me cum."

"I'm sure you will, baby," Die returned as he drove, perhaps, a little faster than he normally would have toward their home.

Kyo bit his lip and stroke his hand over his cock, circling his thumb over the head a bit. He smirked and gathered up a drop of pre, waiting until the next light to hold his finger out to Die.

Die pulled up at the light and reached to take Kyo's hand, licking his finger clean and then sucking it more lewdly than was necessary. He placed the hand on his own bulge, pulling out from the light a moment later.

Kyo groaned as Die sucked on his finger, his dick twitching. His hand was placed on Die's bulge, and he immediately began messaging him through his pants, pleased to see that Die was just as hard.

Die grunted out a little bit when Kyo's fingers actually began to touch him. He pushed his hips up slightly and made quick work of driving the rest of the way back to the house. Once he arrived in the driveway, he squeezed his hand over Kyo's and then smirked. "Put it away and come inside."

When they finally arrived home, Kyo was quick to follow Die's instructions. He tucked his dick back into his pants but didn't bother to do them up. Instead, he just hurriedly headed for the door.

Die followed a bit slower, getting both of their bags and heading inside. Stepping in, he knelt to get his boots off and then turned on Kyo, shoving him against the wall with one hand. "On your knees."

Kyo had barely gotten his own boots off when Die shoved him into the wall, making him groan. He slid to his knees and looked up at his lover, his eyes full of desire.

Die undid his pants and murmured, "Hands behind your head. Keep them there."

Kyo did as he was asked, interlacing his fingers behind his head. "Like this?"

"Just like that, gorgeous," Die murmured. He realized vaguely that they'd left Kyo's shirt behind on stage somewhere, but he didn't give a shit right then, knowing it's be returned to Kyo at some point regardless. He shifted his stance and moved in closer to Kyo, his dick against his lips. "Lick it."

Kyo kept his eyes on Die's face as he opened his mouth and snaked his tongue out, flicking it over his lover's dick lightly. He did this a couple of times before moving in and swirling his tongue around the head, groaning softly.

Die breathed out a soft sigh of pleasure as the other man began doing delectable things to him. His hips canted forward slightly, and he huffed out a quiet laugh. "Such a little cock-whore... so eager to get your lips around my dick and suck it for all your worth." Something about being dominant always made him want to open the proverbial flood-gates on the dirty talk, and this time he didn't hold it back, tossing the comments at Kyo as they came to mind.

Kyo glowered up at Die even as his mouth was full of his lover's cock. He gave it a particularly hard suck then began bobbing his head, his hands coming up to rest on Die's hips.

Die growled, grasping Kyo's wrists and putting his hands back behind his head. "I didn't tell you to move those, now did I?"

Kyo squirmed a little and made a sound around Die's cock. "Mmph." He focused on moving his head again, taking more and more of Die into his mouth and throat.

Kyo eagerly sucked Die's cock as his own strained out, painfully hard again. He wondered if he'd be getting relief anytime soon and found that he kind of hoped Die would hold off. 

Die held Kyo's hands tight where he wanted them, taking some thrill off the power of holding him there while he sucked his cock. After a few more moments of it, he pulled himself away and stepped back. For an instant, he hesitated, all of his fears surfacing in that moment. He knew where he'd been wanting to take this, where he'd found he sort of had a desire to try things out at. But he felt like a prick for wanting some of what he did, for even thinking of it. He closed his eyes for a moment, his voice coming out stronger than he felt right then, "Close your eyes and stay put." He checked to ensure Kyo complied and then closed his own again, getting his bearings. He had to remember the book he'd been reading for days now, that told him he wasn't a bad person for giving Kyo what he wanted, just because it went against all other things he'd ever lived by. It was like acting... like a movie... a role to play, nothing more.

Swallowing down his fears, he opened his eyes and then let go of Kyo's hands, grasping him by the hair instead. "On your feet."

Upon Die's command, he closed his eyes and waited, wondering what was coming next. He felt Die release his hands then felt a sharp pain in his scalp as his hair was pulled. He let out a low sound of protest but struggled to his feet, his eyes still firmly shut.

Die glanced back at Kyo, realizing he'd not let him open his eyes. And given they were headed for the stairs... it might be a better plan than a trip to the hospital. "You may open your eyes for the navigation of the stairs. As soon as we're up, shut them again." He pulled Kyo to a halt in front of the stairs and then let go of his hair, slipping two fingers into his necklace and using it to tug him along instead.

Kyo opened his eyes and stared at Die with lust burning in them. The way his lover was taking control was really getting to him, and he ached to reach down and grope himself. He followed along up the stairs then let his lids fall shut again.

Die led Kyo into the bedroom and then studied the area, making sure where Kyo would land after this next part wouldn't actually hurt him. With his eyes closed, he'd never know where he was going to fall though. He left Kyo by the door. "Stay there. Lose the pants." Grasping the bed covers, he shoved them all into the floor and built a little barrier of pillows so Kyo'd be protected from the dresser. With that, he went back to get Kyo, yanking his hair to get him away from the doorway, then shoving his shoulder to get him started stumbling forward. A moment later, he brought up his foot and shoved it against Kyo's behind, sending him sprawling into the mass of softness he'd created on the floor.

Kyo once again listened to what Die said and halted in place. He shifted slightly from foot to foot, eagerly kicking off his pants and chewing his lip in anticipation. Suddenly, Die shoved him and he stumbled a bit, his foot meeting with what felt like a pile of clothing. He didn't have long to contemplate what it was before Die's foot on his ass had him falling onto what turned out to be the bed covers. He groaned and caught himself with his hands, letting out a soft huff. This he had not been expecting, and it only served to heighten the experience for him. "Asshole."

"Shut up." Die came to kneel over him. "I never said you could have a mouth for anything other than my cock, now did I?" He shoved Kyo's face down into the bedsheets and rubbed it there for a moment. "Fucking treat you like the cats if you're gonna act like one."

Kyo growled as his cheek was pushed against the sheets. He jerked his head away a bit, wondering how much Die would put up with him fighting him. "Didn't know you liked pussy that much."

"Shut your fucking mouth, "Die ground out, "You're the one with a fucking tit-fetish, not me." He smacked him up the back of the head enough to make him feel it, but not enough to truly hurt. "One more word, and you will regret it."

Kyo bared his teeth in Die's generally direction but kept his mouth clamped shut for the moment. He shifted onto his knees and placed his hands on his hips, still snarling slightly.

Die looked satisfied with that much at least. He'd gotten what he asked for, though some part of him had wanted to see the look on Kyo's face when he told him to hose off the patio as punishment. He sat back on his haunches and studied the other man, the ropes criss-crossing his body that he'd tied on in the morning.

With a little exhalation of breath, he reached to run his thumb from Kyo's bellybutton to where the top rope resided, just above the neatly trimmed hair. He didn't say a word as he slid his hand down, grasping Kyo's length and starting to jack him off in exactly the way he knew Kyo would love, his aim to bring the other high and then leave him hanging on the edge and walk away.

Kyo shivered when Die finally touched him in a way that wasn't getting him from one place to the other. The other's fingers sliding over his skin where the rope was made him bite his lip, the sensation delightful. He shifted slightly then gasped as Die's hand wrapped around his achingly hard cock, his hips bucking forward of their volition.

Die smirked a little at Kyo's reaction, his fingers moving in all the right ways, the pressure at just the right times, the flick of his wrist bringing pleasure to him again and again as he brought Kyo higher and higher, watching for the telltale signs his lover was about to lose it.

Kyo's head tipped back as pleasure coursed through him. He bucked his hips more eagerly into Die's hand, pants and moans issuing from his mouth. Soon, his hands were clenching at his sides and his eyes popped open to stare at Die as he could feel that coil about to snap within him.

Die waited on that moment, the wild look in Kyo's eyes, the part of his lips in those last precious seconds. It was the look he craved like nothing else. The fleeting start of freedom, of free-floating bliss. It was then that he knew Kyo couldn't have a single horrible thought in his mind, only the singular one to desire more of that one feeling. And that was what had attracted him to this particular part of the play: denial. He wondered if he could bring it to a point where that singularity expanded and became the only thing Kyo could focus on, that one desire clouded over everything else for longer than few achingly small seconds before orgasm. He pulled his hand away and softly murmured, "I order you to relax. Do not tense, do not flex, do not attempt to achieve release."

Kyo was climbing that blissful ladder to release, higher and higher, so close to his peak. He let out a moan as he could almost feel the coil snap and then...Die's hand was gone and his mouth ordered Kyo to relax. A pained sound escaped his lips as he stared at his lover, his hands going to fist tightly in the sheets beneath him. He forced in a breath and then another, trying to climb back off the edge of the cliff that he'd been about to tumble over.

Die tilted his head a little, watching Kyo's reaction to what was happening right then. His lover was struggling to come back down, but he didn't want him all the way down, he wanted him on edge. He slid his fingertips over the thatch of hair at the base of Kyo's cock, his fingers trailing down over the tightened flesh of his balls. "So close," he murmured quietly, "So blissfully close... and so beautiful."

Kyo visibly shuddered and let out keening sound, close to a whine. He gazed at Die, his cock flexing of its own accord when the other touched him again. He opened his mouth to say something then closed it, remembering he wasn't supposed to speak. He simply drew his lip between his teeth and bit hard as another groan escaped him.

Die watched from under hooded lashes, finally shifting back and just watching his lover for a few moments. Then he stood up and simply walked away, hitching his own pants back up a bit, glad he'd worn tighter ones tonight. He strayed into their little musical setup area and settled down on his stool, picking up his guitar and running his hands affectionately over it. With a smirk, he began to play, the cool back of it touching his achingly hard length as he strummed.

Kyo whimpered softly when Die stopped touching him. He watched his lover leave the room then heard the sounds of Die's guitar. Groaning, he pushed himself to his feet and moving into the music area, watching Die play, his cock bobbing every now and then.

Die looked up at him and then arched one slim eyebrow. "Did I tell you to move?" he asked, his voice holding a hint of danger.

Kyo's eyes widened slightly then he shook his head, lips pursing slightly. He wanted to speak, to bitch at Die for leaving him like this but he held his tongue, for now.

"That's what I thought." He strummed out a few more notes and then some crazy shit before putting his guitar aside with a sniff. "If you're going to act like a dog who needs their master on them every second to follow instructions, then get down on your hands and knees like one."

Kyo silently watched Die play his guitar a bit then stared at him wide-eyed when he basically called him a dog. He ground his teeth and crossed his arms for a moment before finally complying, getting down on the ground on his knees, a sour look on his face.

Die snorted a bit and got up, walking past and lightly ruffling Kyo's hair. A second later, he yanked hard on his hair and then let go, walking off once again. "If you get off your hands and knees, this ends, unless I say otherwise. We clear?"

Kyo yelped a little at the hair pulling, wincing then turning to watch Die walk off. He huffed out a breath then nodded, shifting a bit. He may have been irritated on the outside but truly he was loving every moment of it, his cock so hard he thought it might burst. He hoped Die was enjoying it as well, he seemed to be.

Die went downstairs and got a bottle of water. Coming back up the stairs, he paused on the second to last step and knelt down. "C'mere."

Kyo sat still while Die was gone, for once obeying his lover. When the other returned, he turned around and crawled over to the stairs, looking at Die expectantly.

Die chuckled and leaned down to kiss Kyo's nose. "Adorable little baby you are."

Kyo wrinkled his nose, a look on his face saying that he clearly disliked being called an adorable little baby.

Die leaned in and pressed his lips to his ear, as if sharing a secret. "You hating it makes it that much more delicious, love."

Kyo sighed and shifted around a bit, resisting the urge to nip at the closest thing of Die's he could reach just then.

Die licked his earlobe and then pulled back, studying him. He could make him suffer so much, but he chose not to, chose to lay off the humiliation aspect in the ways he knew he could have pulled and much enjoyed. But he wanted Kyo to enjoy it as well and certain things... he knew just wouldn't go over so well. He scratched him under the chin and then stepped around him. "Come."

Kyo pulled away just the slightest bit from the chin scratching then turned and crawled after Die, grunting a little as his knees scraped over the carpet.

Die stepped into the bedroom and then moved to beside the door, waiting on Kyo to crawl up next to him.

Kyo was slow to make it into the bedroom but he finally did and then settled at Die's feet, looking up at him.

Die knelt down again and reached under him, grasping his cock and jacking him off quickly, his mouth slicking over Kyo's neck, straight to the point that usually made him whimper with need when he sucked it.

Kyo was suddenly thrown back into pleasure as Die began jerking him off once more. His lover's tongue on his neck soon had him moaning, his hand clawing at the ground slightly.

Once again, Die pushed Kyo to his limits, listening to him this time, the other's moans music to his ears. Once he was sure he had him worked up nearly to the point of no return, he let him go. "Same rules. You may stand now."

Die smirked at the other, at how radiant and glorious he looked like this. Debauched was a word that came to mind. Wetting his lips, he moved in, one finger pressing under Kyo's chin, his lips meeting the others in the most gentle of caresses, completely in opposition to what he'd been doing to him just seconds before.

A few more tender, sweet seconds slid past and then he pulled away, slowly backing up and then turning to step into their closet, taking down a box and removing a Poloroid camera from it. He loaded it with new film and made sure the flash-bulb was new before coming back out and taking one of Kyo before he could react to the knowledge that he had a camera in hand. Unadulterated, unabashed... purity. That was what he was looking for in that moment. He pulled it free and set it aside on the dresser, stepping up to Kyo again. He pierced him with a lustful look and then murmured, "Tonight you are mine. In every single way."

As Die kissed him so tenderly, part of him longed to reach out and slip his arms around his lover and pull him close. He was aching for release to the point that it was rather painful now though he knew the end results would be explosive to say the least. 

Die moved away and into their closet, leaving Kyo to wonder what the other was doing. He licked his lips then looked up when he heard Die re-enter the room, only to have a flash go off in his face without warning. He gasped then blinked a few times before it dawned on him that Die had just taken his picture. He almost groaned at being captured like this, so vulnerable but he decided that his lover was probably looking for just that. 

At Die's words, he met his eyes and licked his lips again before drawing the bottom one between his teeth. He stood, completely submissive and willing to do whatever Die wanted right then.

Die reached out, lightly drawing his fingers over his lover's cheek. "You may talk to me, so long as you address me in a kind and gentle manner. I don't want any cussing, no backtalk... just... kind... sweet... gentle... adoring Tooru, are we clear?" His own voice was equally as kind, his fingertips inflicting only tenderness for the time being.

Kyo listened to Die, shivering at the touch and nearly flinching at his birth name. It seemed so very out of place in this setting though he supposed that was why Die chose to use it. He swallowed slightly then lowered his head, his words coming out low and softly. "Please...let me cum. I don't know how much more I can take...at the least, let me touch you..."

Die's lips curved up in a gentle smile. "I promise you, I will let you cum, darling." The use of the pet name wasn't at all built in the manner it had been earlier in the night. When he said it this time, it was all tenderness and loving care. His fingertips left Kyo's cheek finally, dancing lightly through his hair, stroking as if he were petting for a moment, and then departing his scalp. "Lay on the bed, face-up, and slightly askew. No pillow under your head."

Kyo nodded slightly then followed Die's instructions, laying on his back, at an angle, making sure his head was not on a pillow. "Like this?"

Die moved to gently adjust him, moving him ever so slightly this way or that. He fluffed up his hair a bit and then took Kyo's left hand, moving it to his lips, pushing one slim digit into the vocalist's own mouth, lightly curving the rest. With the other hand, he ever so delicately moved his hand to his lower abdomen, fingertips almost grazing the base of his cock, but not quite. And then he knelt and took a few close-ups, shifting back and taking in the whole scene with the camera. He set those aside as well. "You may touch yourself for four seconds. No more, no less. And you may not cum by your own hand. When you are allowed, it will be by my hand."

Kyo groaned a little as he was shifted here and there, wondering just what Die was up to. He found out when his lover started taking more photos. He smiled a little himself and gave the camera a few sultry looks, knowing these pictures were for Die and for Die alone. 

"Four seconds? Very well..." He shifted a little and reached down, wrapping his hand around the head of his cock, squeezing hard, unable to help bucking up into his own touch. "Gods…so hard for you Die..." He gave himself a few hard strokes then dropped his hand to the side, gazing up at Die once more.

Die waited on Kyo to start touching himself, catching that first moment of relief on film and then the moment he was letting himself go, the defeat of that moment, the urge still in his belly that wasn't fulfilled at all. Die carefully set the camera aside then and murmured, "Close your eyes once more, love."

Kyo squirmed a little then let his eyes slide shut. He took the moment to settle his arms over his head, getting more comfortable.

Die glanced over at Kyo, smiling as little as he pulled out the pump lube and squirted one pump on his fingers, settling down on the bed beside his lover. He lifted one of Kyo's legs and then pushed his index finger against him, sliding deep inside and crooking up hard against Kyo's prostate in hopes that it'd surprise him so much he might very well lose it from only that.

Kyo lay there listening to Die move around. He thought he heard the sound of lube being pumped out and Die's finger moving against him confirmed it. He let out a soft sound at being touched then all out cried out as Die's finger pushed into him and immediately hit his prostate. His hips snapped up, and he gripped the sheets tightly as he flew over the edge just from the sheer intensity of pleasure, cum spurting from his cock in copious amounts to paint his stomach and chest and even landing by his shoulder. "DAI~SUKE!"

Die watched only his lover's face, simply staring at the way the other reacted, the way he looked so utterly amazing in those fleeting moments. He smiled to himself as he slid his finger free and quietly wiped it on a tissue. He wanted his own release so badly, but the truth was... he needed something else far more in those moments. He needed Kyo by his side, the comfort, the love... in some ways he needed the come-down more than Kyo probably did.

He slid off the bed, gathering up the comforter and the pillows, tossing them back up on the bed and then pushing his own clothing off into a heap on the floor. He gathered up the photos of Kyo and quickly slipped back onto the bed, gathering his lover up in his arms and helping him turn to lie against the pillows. He picked up tissues and tenderly wiped Kyo's body clean before he pressed himself against him, the photos splayed across the bed beside them. "Rinkaku," he whispered softly against Kyo's ear, letting him know they were done, that this was as far as he'd been able to take this.

Kyo shuddered as he slowly relaxed back against the mattress, eyes opening to stare at Die with a bright gaze. He let his lover clean him up then curled into his arms. A soft smile graced his lips as his lover uttered their safe-word, ending the session all together. He shifted and leaned up, spearing his fingers in Die's hair and kissing him hard and deep. "I love you."

Die let out a soft groan into the kiss, nearly clinging to Kyo, his heart racing now that he was done, the apparent calmness of the last part wearing off fast. He pulled back and just stared into Kyo's eyes before he ducked his head and pushed it against the pillow over Kyo's shoulder, tears welling up that he didn't want to admit to. How weak was it that the Dom ended up emotionally unstable afterward? Parts of him felt ashamed over some of the things he'd done and other parts were still so turned on it wasn't even right. He clutched Kyo closer.

Kyo could feel Die breaking before he even pulled away. He could only smile a little as he wrapped his arms tightly around Die and petted his hair softly. All in all, Kyo had enjoyed nearly every moment of what had gone on though he was surprised his lover had yet to cum. He pushed that aside for the moment though in favor of soothing Die.

Die didn't say a word for quite some time, simply holding onto Kyo and attempting to give him back the same courtesy he was being given, his hand stroking over his lover's side and then his arm while he tried to calm himself down. After a few minutes he managed to relax enough to stop the tears and he rubbed his face against the pillow, uttering quietly, "Face itches," as a way of telling Kyo he didn't want to talk about his little crying jag.

Shifting around, he wet his lips a little and then sat up slightly, cupping Kyo's cheek in his hand. "Tell me what you need, my love."

Kyo rubbed his hand through Die's hair then over his back, caressing him tenderly. He simply nodded at Die's statement about an itchy face, ignoring the fact that he could feel moisture on his shoulder.

When Die sat up and asked him what he needed, he smiled and reached up, pulling Die down for another kiss. "Make love to me."

Something like surprise filtered over Die's face at the simple idea that Kyo would want that from him right then. But then... it was the simplest route to making both of them feel grounded once again, to bringing the whole thing back around to love and caring and tenderness. 

He closed his eyes for a moment and then it hit him how much different he felt even going into this. The idea of making love to Kyo completely different than it had been in the past. He found that his sexual relief was completely in the background, his true desire utterly emotional in nature. Even as he nodded and moved himself enough to pull the lube over... even as he coated his length in the slick fluid... his arousal wasn't his focus. And in that next moment, he gently shifted Kyo beneath him, moving one of the vocalist's legs up to hook over his shoulder, hunching down enough to make it possible without discomfort to the shorter man. His hands were quick to move a pillow under Kyo's body, shifting them both up enough to find the relief to the strain in his own back, and then his slick fingers, ever so gently exploring his lover's entrance.

Kyo watched the changes come over Die's face, the look of surprise fading into one more emotional. He shifted around, reaching to caress Die now and then as the other prepared things, getting them just so. He let out the faintest of sighs as slick fingers touched him, one hand going to stroke up and down Die's arm. "You're gorgeous," he murmured softly.

Die's eyes flicked up to meet Kyo's own, his gaze focused on his lover as his fingers explored and then, finally, slipped inside, slowly stretching Kyo in all the right ways. "I love you," he returned to the compliment.

Kyo smiled softly then it faltered as Die's touch pulled a soft moan from him. He moved his hand to slide over his own stomach then down, brushing over his length before meeting up with Die's fingers, lightly stroking them and the area around them.

Die's breath caught at Kyo's simple touch to his hand. It was intimate, almost gloriously so, and he let out the softest of whimpers in response to it. He pulled his fingers free, wiping them on a tissue and then positioning himself just so before pressing the head of his cock inside his lover's body. He stopped there, his eyelids fluttering shut as he simply felt.

Kyo loved the way Die responded, relished the look on his lover's face. He pulled back when Die moved and just watched as the other pushed into him, a low moan escaping him. He closed his eyes as well, focusing on the way it felt to have his lover inside him.

Die pushed slowly forward, sheathing himself within the other's tight passage. It felt just as good as it always did, but something else was there... that little hint of it not being about the orgasm, but about something deeper than that. He shifted himself so that he was closer to Kyo, his lover's leg sliding down to catch around his arm, hooking it there as he leaned in to run the flat of his tongue over Kyo's nipple, just a single swipe of the wet appendage as he began to move, his hips finding a slow and sensual rhythm, less thrusting and more grinding gently against his lover's body.

Kyo shivered slightly as Die filled him completely. There was no sense of urgency this time. His mind was focused on the joining, on him and Die becoming one. When his lover leaned into him, he wrapped his arms around him, holding on tightly, soft, pleased sounds issuing from his lips.

Die didn't stop, never faltered a single moment, his body falling into the rhythm as naturally as his fingers found their own upon the strings of his guitar. And for the very first time in their entire relationship he felt what it was like to truly know Kyo. There was no urgency, no desperate race toward the finish line, just... existence. Peaceful, blissful existence.

Kyo felt a transition in the mood of the moment, a sort of calmness coming over him. He gave a soft sigh, his body relaxing back against the bed even as his hips gently rocked in rhythm with Die's movements. He gazed up into Die's face and smiled tenderly, his heart beating hard and fast. He knew, in that moment, that there was nothing more in this world that he wanted.

It lasted a lot longer than Die had ever dreamed possible after all day of working himself up so badly. And when he finally did cum, it was with the slowest push of his hips, his face contorting into a mask of utter bliss, his hands sliding up and over Kyo's thighs as he continued to move through his orgasm, the gentle little pushes of his hips punctuated by the feather-light sounds of his voice as he nearly whimpered out his pleasure.

Kyo was not surprised that he barely got aroused by what Die was doing. This was deeper than that and though he was half hard when he felt his lover finally tumble over the edge, he was uninterested in seeking out his own pleasure again, choosing to focus on Die instead. He watched his lover's face contort with pleasure, and he reached up, tugging him down to hold him close, his hips rolling upward to carry Die over that edge. "I love you, Daisuke," he murmured into his ear, his hands moving to stroke over his back.

Die let out a final little sigh of breath, stilling within Kyo as he allowed his pleasure to simply wash over him, his mind slowly pushing through the haze of his mind. Relief settled over him like the warmth of a blanket and he eased himself from Kyo's body, gently letting his lover's leg down and then shifting to his side, tucking himself against Kyo, his hand lying low on his abdomen. "I love you, too, my sweet."

Kyo sighed softly and then curled into Die, resting his hand over the other's. He relaxed, letting his eyes slide shut. "This was perfect, Die."

Die made a little sound against Kyo's shoulder, lightly kissing him there. "What did you like best?" he asked quietly.

Kyo traced his fingers over Die's hand, humming softly. "Honestly, I liked the ropes being around me all day. Every time I moved and felt them, I was reminded that I was yours."

A little smile slid over Die's lips at that, his hand lightly plucking at the ropes he hadn't removed yet. After a moment, he slid his hands down to start untying them, careful with his work. "I really liked taking pictures of you... and..." his cheeks turned a bit pink, "the denial."

Kyo shifted a bit, almost sad to see the ropes go but at the same time, his skin was a bit relieved. He ran his hand over the slightly imprinted areas then smiled. "Mm, next time, remind me to set up one of my cameras for you. I would have no problem with letting you capture that...As for the denial, yes...I liked that, too."

Die leaned in to lightly kiss Kyo's shoulder as he continued to remove the ropes, his fingers pausing every now and then to enjoy the feeling of Kyo's dimpled skin beneath where the ropes had been sitting. Once he was done, he settled back, his mood slowly becoming more somber. He swallowed hard once and then quietly admitted, "I'm... conflicted... with some of the things I did."

Kyo shifted around a bit more then looked up at Die, frowning slightly. "Like what?"

Die took in a deep breath and then let it out, closing his eyes for a moment. "Shoving you around... I..." he wasn't sure he wanted to admit it, but he knew he needed to or he'd feel remorse over it forever, "on some level I got off on it... and that scares the shit out of me."

Kyo looked up at Die then licked his lips. "Die, I don't think that it's anything you should be upset about. It was in a controlled situation...and I know you wouldn't truly harm me."

Die studied him and then shifted slightly, reaching to lightly rub over one of the areas of skin that still had the rope's pattern embedded into it. "It just makes me feel guilty... like I'm a bad person... for liking it."

Kyo bit his lip then let out a little laugh. "Then what kind of person am I for getting off on being pushed around?" He reached up to stroke Die's cheek softly. "Please don't feel bad...or guilty. I asked you to do it."

Kyo's laugh caught him off guard a bit, but the words that followed it made far more sense. He nodded a little and then gave Kyo a soft smile. "I see your point...." He reached past Kyo and picked up one of the photos, the first one he'd taken, studying it, and then handing it over to Kyo. "Do you see what I love so much about those moments? Why I love being intimate with you so very much?"

Kyo brushed Die's hair from his face, a feeling of relief sweeping through him as his lover understood his point and didn't get upset. He leaned in to press his lips to Die's cheek before taking the photo and peering at it. "I'm completely open...I'm me," he uttered quietly.

Die nodded a little at Kyo's response. "It's like every single grievance, every pain, every horrible, self-deprecating thought... is just ripped from you... gone. It leaves behind everything else, all the other layers of you that are so very, very precious." He slid his hand over Kyo's skin to place it over his heart. "It's the man beneath the pain."

Something about what Die was saying struck a chord within him, and he felt his throat tightening with emotion. He nodded and placed his hand over Die's, his breath stuttering for a moment as he became overwhelmed.

Die curled his fingers with Kyo's own and took the picture, lying it on the nightstand where it could be seen at a single glance. For now, that was where it would live. "Do you see now? Why I crave you every single second, of every single day? I feel like if I see it enough, if I draw it out enough times... that more and more of it will stick to the surface, that the pain will become a background." He leaned down, pressing a kiss to Kyo's ear. "I love you the way you are, but there's nothing I wouldn't give to make you even happier."

Kyo closed his eyes for a moment, listening to Die's words, feeling them seep into his very soul. He couldn't and had no desire to stop the sudden tears that tracked down his face. Even as he let out the quietest sob possible, he was smiling through the tears because Die was his happiness, through it all.

Die gathered Kyo impossibly closer to himself, tucking the smaller man under his chin and holding on tight to him. He didn't have the words he wanted to say, everything he could think of coming up empty after he'd just bled his heart out to Kyo. Instead, he remained silent, lightly stroking Kyo's hair, cradling him close.

Kyo laid there and let himself cry, letting it cleanse him and renew him. He struggled to find the words to respond to Die's and instead just ended up squeezing his hand hard as he fought to stop sniffling and hiccupping. 

Finally, after several more minutes, he brought himself under control and turned, pressing his face against Die's neck. "As long as you are by my side, I am the happiest man alive."

Die let a gentle smile surface, his hand finally just resting on Kyo's hair rather than stroking over it. "The same for me, love." With a little sigh, he shifted back. Knowing now wasn't the time to leave Kyo alone, but he had some other urgent matters to attend to as well. He peered down at Kyo and then leaned in, gently kissing him before slipping over him and picking up the photos, studying each one and then putting them in a neat stack on the dresser. "Come with me for a moment?"

Kyo took in a deep breath and let it out, feeling raw and bare but safe within Die's arms. He finally smiled a little then looked up when Die moved. At his lover's request, he nodded and sat up, standing and grasping Die's hand. "Mother nature won't hold, hm?"

The redhead bit his lip a little and then shook his head, issuing a slight sigh. "Sorry..." he gave him a wry smile and then led the way out of the room. Once in the bathroom, he gestured a little. "Get in the shower?"

Kyo nodded a little then moved to get into the shower, turning the water on hot and full blast while he waited for Die to finish up taking care of his needs.

Die made quick work of everything he needed to do and then slipped into the shower, his hands already wet from washing them in the sink. He shifted behind Kyo and then tugged him back against his chest, pushing his hands out of the way from where he was already washing his hair. "Let me..."

Kyo had just gotten started shampooing when Die joined him. He smiled and removed his hands, pushing then under the water to rinse them off. "If you insist, love."

"I do." Die gently massaged the other's scalp, paying careful attention to make sure he didn't send any soap into his eyes. "I didn't mean to make you cry... but everything I said was perfectly true."

Kyo closed his eyes and let Die carry on, leaning into him slightly. He huffed out a weak laugh and shook his head slightly at Die's words. "It was like a dam breaking, I suppose...there was no helping it. You have this magic ability to tear down every wall I could ever put up."

Die huffed out a little laugh. "Yeah... I know. I do it on purpose sometimes, I admit. Because sometimes it's exactly what you need to build it all back up again without all the ugly trapped on the inside."

Kyo just shook his head before turning and catching Die's lips in a soft kiss. "You sneaky bastard."

Die returned the kiss gently and then murmured quietly, "I have my ways," before taking the shower head off the hook and tilting Kyo's head back to wash his hair out.

Kyo snorted lightly then shifted, letting Die do as he pleased with his hair. "I know..." He waited until Die was finished before lifting his head back up and grabbing the conditioner, holding it out and pouring some into Die's hands.

Die actually threw back his head and laughed, letting Kyo put the conditioner in his hand, hanging up the shower head with the other. "So you like this that much, hmm?"

Kyo pursed his lips at his lover's laugh then rolled his eyes. "You said you insisted...I was just helping." He sniffed then turned his back to Die, hands resting on his hips.

"Mmmhmm..." Die chuckled, moving to put the conditioner in Kyo's hair, pressing close again. "Just remember... if you ask, I'll always help if I can lift my arms, okay?"

Kyo gave in and chuckled softly. "Okay…wait...why wouldn't you be able to lift your arms?"

Die made a little thinking face and then shrugged. "Injure myself, sick as hell, I have no idea. But there's a stipulation involved that I can actually physically do what I say."

Kyo snorted and turned around, handing Die the sponge. "You think too much, love."

"Always and forever." Die took the sponge and eyed it. "Still don't know why you like these instead of the fluffy ones." He poured some of his own gel on it and then began rubbing it over Kyo's body, rather obviously trying to mark Kyo with his scent in every way possible short of actually marking his territory.

Kyo shrugged then held out his arms a bit. "It was there? I dunno." He sniffed then eyed the gel Die had used, grinning a little. "Marking me, love? You could just piss on my leg..."

"I could and if you don't watch it, I might," Die returned easily, seeming a bit less on edge than usual about certain aspects of his own sexuality.

Kyo chuckled then moved forward, wrapping his arms around Die and rubbing against him, getting soap on him as well. "As long as we're at home or someplace I can wash quickly, I don't care."

"Mmm... see, I'm not the only one with stipulations." He smirked a bit and leaned down to nip at Kyo's ear. "Least romantic question ever, but have you cleaned your piercing lately? Like taken it out and cleaned? It's been long enough you should be able to."

Kyo grinned then leaned into Die before tilting his head. "Mm, I haven't, actually...Why do you ask? Wanna do it for me?"

Die lightly kissed the side of Kyo's head and then finished up with washing the other parts. He knelt down and put the sponge on his knee, rinsing his hand and then reaching to lightly hold the piercing and then start unscrewing the little ball on the end.

Kyo braced his hands on the wall of the shower, watching as Die began disassembling his piercing. He couldn't help the soft little sound that escaped at the touch to his cock, still feeling the slightest bit sensitive.

Die's eyes flicked up and then back down as he held the ball out to Kyo. "Hold this." Once he'd handed it off, he went back to sliding the piercing out and then reaching toward the antibacterial soap, squirting some onto his hand and the piercing. He washed that first and then reached down to actually clean out the hole.

Kyo took the ball, clasping it tight in his hand. He peered down at the piercing as Die washed the bar, glad to see that it wasn't gross or anything. Die began cleaning out the actual hole and he hissed a little, finding the sensation a bit odd.

"Does it hurt?" Die asked, a twinge of worry in his voice. After a few more seconds, he gently turned Kyo to let the water from the shower flow over it to rinse it clean.

"It just felt a bit weird or something. I think because of the nature of the area." He smiled a bit then reached down, twisting his cock here and there to make sure all of the soap was out of the hole. "Thanks, baby."

Die waited until Kyo was done, nodding a bit. "No problem. Just realized the timing was about right to finally remove and wash, then put it back in. And I imagine it's probably not all that easy to do this part yourself." He held up the bar before taking his cock in hand and finding the hole, gently starting to push the piercing back through.

Kyo hummed then let out a little grunt as Die pushed the bar back in, liking the sensation a bit more than he'd like to admit. "Yeah, you're right."

Die's gaze traveled up to Kyo's face and he arched his eyebrow. "Masochist." With that, he reached for the little ball. "Gimme."

Kyo looked away then back to Die, handing him the ball. "There's a reason my dick is pierced..."

Die carefully screwed the ball back on and then lightly tapped the head of his cock. "Want to know something hilarious?"

Kyo waited until Die was done then flexed his cock a bit. "Mm, what's that?"

"It seriously took me three times of seeing your dick on the off-chance in the bathroom before I fully realized you weren't circumcised."

Kyo looked up at Die and chuckled. "Really?" He reached down and grasped his cock, pulling forward so that the foreskin covered the head. "I never really think much of it."

Die let out a soft hum. "Of course not, it's yours." He reached to lightly run his fingertip over the now loose skin. He smirked slightly. "I was so nervous way back the second time we had sex about hurting you. I researched if there were things I needed to do differently during sex or if you needed to wash differently than me, what would hurt, what wouldn't." He let out a laugh and then pushed himself to his feet. "I'm a complete dweeb."

Kyo groaned faintly at the touch then moved to get shampoo, looking as Die as told him of his research. He chuckled softly and leaned up on his tiptoes. "You're completely adorable. Now let me wash your hair."

Die let out a soft laugh and then pulled the little chair down from the sidewall, settling down on it and waiting on Kyo. "Isn't it ridiculous... that from day... two... I've freaked out over such stupid things?"

Kyo smiled a little as Die sat down for him. He poured a good amount of shampoo into his palm then started slowly massaging it into Die's scalp. "Mm maybe a little but that's okay. I find it sweet."

Die cleared his throat a bit. "I have a confession."

Kyo focused on getting all of Die's hair sudsed up then moved to lightly rub his shoulders for a moment. "And what's that?"

Die let out a groan when Kyo's hands went to his shoulders, enjoying that greatly. "When you work out... I like to pretend to be asleep so I can watch you."

Kyo's hands worked Die's shoulder muscles for a moment before pausing. He raised an eyebrow then chuckled softly. "Really? All this time I thought I was working out alone..."

Die ducked his head a little. "Sometimes I am actually asleep... if I don't notice you leave the bed. But if I feel you get up... I wait on it."

Kyo smoothed his hands over Die's back, ignoring the shampoo for a moment. "Mm, you should just get up and watch, baby. Maybe I'll add some stripper moves or twerking to my workout." He laughed then finally grabbed the shower head, moving to rinse his lover's red hair.

Die choked out a laugh. "I'd pay good money for that." He leaned back to let Kyo rinse his hair, closing his eyes, shoulders still shaking with laughter.

Kyo very lightly sprayed Die in the face then went back to his hair, getting of it rinsed out. He replaced the shower head and then got the conditioner, massaging that into Die's hair next. "I'm sure you would..."

Die sputtered a little and one-eye glowered at him. "Dick." He smirked a bit a moment later and then settled again.

Kyo leaned over Die and kissed him upside down. "I know."

Die smirked a bit and then closes his eyes, relaxing again the wall slightly. "Mmm... so it's been a little bit... should we discuss things again?"

Kyo rinsed the conditioner from Die's hair then took care of actually washing his body. He shifted and slipped his arms around Die's shoulders, nuzzling into his wet neck. "Mm, if you'd like."

"I think I need to," Die admitted quietly. "I... looked into some stuff, and there was one resource that said that maybe I would need to talk about it a few times. And I think they're right. I do."

Kyo smiled softly as he came to the realization that Die had put so much effort into this. He hummed then pressed his lips to Die's skin. "Do you want to discuss it right now or would you rather wait until we're dry?"

"We can dry off," Die responded, finally standing up so Kyo could rinse the lower half better, washing off the top.

Kyo nodded then took care of getting Die fully cleaned and rinsed before turning off the shower and grabbing a towel. He patted his lover dry then handed him another towel for his hair before taking care of himself, standing just outside the shower to wait for Die.

Die stepped out behind Kyo and smiled softly at him before going to the sink and putting on some moisturizer and his good hand cream since without it his fingers cracked from the pressure and calluses and chemicals from the spray for the strings. He ran the towel through his hair again and used the hair dryer on it for about two minutes before deciding that was enough and brushing his teeth, applying deodorant, and then a spritz of his cologne. He turned around and murmured, "Tada," with a slightly annoyed look. "I swear... I have more of a routine than half the chicks I know."

Kyo moved to the sink to brush his teeth, watching Die go about his routine with a soft smile on his face. He stole Die's deodorant and used it as well, further spreading his lover's scent on himself. When he was done, he ran a comb through his already drying hair. He leaned against the counter to watch Die finish up, grinning at his statement. "Mm, yeah but you're sexier than any of them so it doesn't matter."

Die snorted softly and then lightly bopped Kyo's nose. "Thank you. Now... back to the glorious bed, yes?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose then nodded, tossing his towel aside and wandering nude from the bathroom to the bedroom before flopping down on the bed with a sigh. "Come, join me you sexy bastard so we can serious talk."

Die left his towel in the bathroom as well, flipping off lights as he went, stepping over the sleeping cat pile in the hallway and then headed into the bedroom, closing the door, just wanting them tonight, no extra pet guests. He settled on the bed and rearranged the covers before lying down and holding open the covers. "C'mere."

Kyo shifted and moved to crawl under the covers with Die, pressing himself against his lover's side, his arms snaking around his body. He placed a kiss to Die's chest then looked up at him.

"So... slightly calmer... less... shocked." Die chuckled a little. "I really... really got off on keeping you so aroused you couldn't think of anything else."

Kyo hummed and smiled a little, shifting against Die. "It was torturous but the end result was…explosive. Being that way on stage, too...it was almost too much."

Die let out a sound between a snort and a laugh. "I was honestly rooting on you losing it on stage and completely jizzing yourself."

Kyo snorted, shifting his hand to run over Die's belly before tickling it lightly. "Yes, well, I came really close a few times...but I desperately wanted you to suck me off."

"Mmm," Die smirked a bit. "Okay, so... on the other end. I know I didn't go as... far?... as you maybe wanted me to with some things. But I sort of went for what I thought would be a sort of compromise between us. However... I know there's things that probably could be done differently... better... I think I can accept a little bit of... critique now."

Kyo thought very carefully about what Die was saying now. He didn't want to hurt his love in the least, especially with something like this. "I have only one complaint, if you will, about it. I would have liked if you'd bent me over whatever flat surface and taken me from behind...roughly. I would say more pain but I know you can only go so far and that's okay."

Die nodded a bit. "I had honestly considered it, but I'd worked you up so badly, and you were just so... naked." It was clear he wasn't only talking clothing-wise. "All my plans changed right that moment, to be honest."

Kyo nodded in understanding, sliding his hand up to rest on Die's chest. "I understand. Oh, and in case I didn't say this, I truly appreciated this."

"Totally worth it for the pics," Die returned, kissing Kyo's shoulder lightly. "I have one question about the last part... is that... is that sort of thing okay with you for the Dominance play? It... it just... it was so erotic for me."

Kyo smiled then looked up at Die. "Yes, I found it incredibly erotic as well and a nice way to...bring it to an end."

Die offered a smile and lightly ran his knuckles down Kyo's cheek. "I'm not sure where it came from, but that part... it was just so easy for me. Completely natural rather than trying to ensure I was doing everything correctly. The dominance like that... I sincerely enjoyed it on every single level."

Kyo licked his lips, slipping his hand down to brush over Die's ribs. He traced patterns over the skin there lightly as he listened to Die then nodded. "I want you to be relaxed and natural when doing this sort of thing, Die. I want both of us to enjoy it. Otherwise, it's just selfish."

Die nodded a little. "It's the mistake I made the first time." He sniffed a little, embarrassed to admit that. "I fucked up on that one, pushed myself too far, overstepped every single boundary I had."

Kyo nodded, frowning just slightly. "Yeah, and the end results weren't good, and that's not what this is about." He laid there quietly for a moment then looked up at Die, his face serious. "Honestly, if you told me right now that you didn't ever want to engage in that sort of thing again, I would be perfectly okay with it because I don't want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable."

Die smiled softly. "We're on the same page then. The same goes for my... sexual deviancy." He sniffed a bit and then ruffled Kyo's hair. "I liked how this time turned out. Granted... I still feel a little conflicted about what we discussed earlier, but I think I can reconcile that with the fact that you liked it and I liked it... and it's just... a role, you know? I'm playing that part. It doesn't mean I am that part."

Kyo nodded and shifted himself up to press his lips lightly to the corner of Die's mouth. "Exactly. It's just a role..."

Die closed his eyes and allowed his mind to drift. Finally, he murmured, "I keep seeing your face... the beauty of how incredibly... naked... you were. Stripped down... your soul bare to me... it stretched those few seconds out into minutes and I loved it so much."

Kyo shifted back and pillowed his head on Die's arm, closing his eyes, one leg moving to drape over his lover's. "Mmm...you'll be the only soul on this planet that gets to see that."

"I feel honored," he murmured softly, yawning a little. "Oh... and making you jerk off for me... oh yeah... I love it."

Kyo chuckled softly then yawned shortly after. "You can always ask me to do that...I've got no problem jerking off for you. I love the look in your eyes, the way your excitement builds as my orgasm does."

Die shivered a little. "I have a request at some point... surprise me with it. Just... middle of the night or morning, if you wake up horny, start jerking it and make it super obvious so I wake up to it. It'll be perfection."

Kyo hummed at the idea, grinning. "You got it. I'll make sure to moan your name or something."

"I fuckin' love you, you amazing man." Die closed his eyes and snuggled under the covers more. "So much."

Kyo smiled softly and pressed his lips to Die's shoulder, drifting off for several moments before softly murmuring, "I fucking love you too, Koi."


	48. Chapter 48

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

Die still wasn't entirely certain where he'd picked up the need to ask certain questions from, but he'd thought about it all the way home from the store. The moment he was inside, he dumped the bags on the counter and went in search of his lover. He found Kyo upstairs, and he tugged him into a light hug as his way of greeting. After a moment, he pulled back and tilted his head a little. "I know it's a little out of nowhere, but... have you ever done drugs before?"

Kyo stared at Die in slight shock, his face reflecting his answer fairly clearly even when he didn't voice a response to the other's question. He pulled back from the hug and leaned on the dresser, one eyebrow arched, as if urging Die to continue.

Die gave him a look and then shrugged. "What? It's a valid question. I'm not the cops, and I'm not gonna change how I look at you because of how you answer. Aside from that... you can ask me any uncomfortable question you want, how's that?"

A heavy sigh left the vocalist's mouth. "Okay... a few times."

Die plopped his behind down on the bed and studied his lover. "What kind?"

Kyo seemed less wary to answer this time, perhaps realizing that Die was just being Die. "Coke... some LSD, but mostly coke."

Die arched one slim eyebrow. "I thought I was the wild child!" He let out a little laugh and then reached for Kyo again, tugging him down on the bed with him and nuzzling into his neck a little. "So... why did you do it?"

Kyo leaned back into Die's embrace, allowing him to guide him however he wanted. A wry laugh left his lips and he shrugged. "Escape and inspiration."

"I'll accept LSD for inspiration, but coke? The high's just too short." Die made a little face, recalling some of the things he'd seen go on in clubs.

"Yeah, I know... it was a blissful escape and rush before getting on stage."

The answer stopped Die's mind right in its tracks as he brought up images, times he'd suspected things but made no move forward on the matter. "Well... that explains a thing or two about '06." He mocked a conversation, changing his voice between his own and a slightly deeper version for Kyo. "Hey, Kyo, are you sick? No... Okay, then why are you throwing up in the trashcan before?" He snorted. "Hmm... now we know."

Kyo let out a little cough, his eyes darting off to the side. "Yes... well...."

Die reached to run his hand through Kyo's short hair, lightly stroking through it to help the other remain calm about the whole thing. "You always struck me as a straight opium type." He shrugged a bit and then paused for a minute before murmuring, "Ask me something uncomfortable."

Kyo looked like he was contemplating Die's words, even after the other had asked him to question him instead. "I might've done that, too... I can't honestly remember." He turned his face, lightly nuzzling himself in under Die's neck. "How many strangers did you mindlessly screw thinking of me?"

Die let out a laugh. "Good lord... straight for the big one, hmm?" He leaned back and debated it, his eyes flicking over the ceiling. "Well... how do you want this? Just a number or information?"

"However you want, baby," Kyo murmured softly.

"So... total... at least six times I can remember doing it on purpose. The first time is probably the most shameful."

Kyo's hand came up, his fingers tangling in Die's red hair. "Yeah?"

"Do you really wanna know this?"

Kyo's response was fast and smooth. "If you want to tell, love."

Die nodded a little. "Well... it's awkward. I didn't really think it through. I was drunk and we were all at that bar the night the press came in to film us? Well... they let some cosplayers in, and one girl ended up in the men's bathroom. She was dressed like you. Damn good lookalike, just... you know... with tits. And I let her suck me off." He made a face that was a bit stressed out, his eyes looking anywhere but at Kyo.

Kyo frowned a little bit at Die's distress and shifted slightly, trying to urge Die on. "What happened after?"

Die shrugged. "She got up, wiped her mouth, and walked off. Second time was more conscious than that. I picked this blonde chick, same sort of general build as you, A-cups... took her home and did my usual routine. Don't ever let a chick tell you I didn't get her off at least twice before ever getting my dick involved if I actually went further than a blow in the bathroom.... But yeah, anyway, I got to the fucking part and ended up behind her, and she asked for anal... and I just couldn't help myself."

"I see... well, I slept with my share of redheads," Kyo admitted quietly.

Die smirked a bit and relaxed slightly, feeling better with that being admitted. "Do you ever miss the boobs?"

Kyo let out a laugh. "Not enough to give you up."

"Never thought that for a second, baby." Die rolled around a little bit on the bed. "Not even curious about me and the drug question?"

Kyo smirked a bit. "Yes... I am."

"Pot twice, ecstasy once, and Adderall for nearly a year." Die winced a bit once he'd said the last part, more than a little upset by the memory of that particular year.

Kyo peered over at Die. "Just twice on pot? And Adderall... was tempting."

Die shrugged. "Just wasn't my thing. Kaoru likes it. Adderall... well... I told you I've had eating disorder issues in the past, and I was originally using it as weight loss and then I stopped sleeping and... yeah. Bad juju. Ecstasy was like freaking horny juice, I swear to god. I came off it and I swear to you, there were four people in my bedroom, and I had photos of me with all of them at least two separate times."

A soft hum left Kyo's mouth before his lips curled upwards in a grin. "There are pictures?"

Die pushed himself up off the bed and went to get a shoebox from the closet, tossing it on the bed next to Kyo and plunking back down on the bed. "My deviancy box."

Kyo reached for the box, opening it and instantly finding some photos of himself on the top layer. He snorted a bit and then dug in deeper. "You little stalker." He tossed aside a few pictures of drugs and such before coming upon the foursome photos. "Holy shit! Is that Boss?!"

Die sat there, smirking ab it at Kyo seeing his pictures. "Yes well..." he responded to the first comment and then, ducking his head, "Yeah, it is. Second time I ever fucked a guy." He looked at least slightly embarrassed.

For a few long moments, Kyo just stared at Die. "You... Boss..." he wasn't really sure how to feel about that.

"If it makes you feel any better, neither of us remembers a damn thing. We... well... let's say we got a bad batch, and there's a reason why I'll never do it again."

Kyo snorted softly. "That's... really kind of amusing, though I'm sorry it was a bad batch. I'd kind of like to lock ourselves up one weekend and get high and fuck like rabbits."

"I'd rather remember it. The Viagra idea would work, there's another one that's less stressful on the heart, but I don't remember the name." He gave Kyo a look.

Kyo hummed thoughtfully. "The Viagra was... nearly painful."

"Yeah. well... ecstasy has a habit of nearly killing people, so let's not, yeah?"

Kyo wrinkled his nose a bit. "Yeah...."

Die leaned back on the bed again and studied the ceiling a bit. "Why coke?"

"Well, I was drunk the first time... the next time I was at some party and this fine-ass boy in a thong offered me a bump and a blow job..." he trailed off for a moment. "The other times just became a slight habit."

"What does it feel like?" Die asked softly.

"Like your brain being a rapidly spinning chamber with bees. You can feel every last nerve you have, and it's on fire."

"Sounds unpleasant," the redhead returned, giving Kyo an odd sort of look, slightly confused why one would want such a feeling.

Kyo's tone of voice changed, and he murmured, "It is..."

Die studied Kyo for a long few moments, finally looking like he got it. "So... I don't really know why I wanted to know, I just did."

Kyo nodded a little and then kissed Die's neck gently. "It's okay."

Die's eyes flitted over the objects in the room. "I should probably get rid of most of that box, huh?" He didn't seem upset, just sort of matter-of-fact about it.

"If you want, baby."

A little smile came over Die's lips. "Wanna burn it?" He gathered up a few of Kyo's pictures and put them on the dresser, handing over one of himself nude to the vocalist.

Kyo studied the picture for a moment and then went to get his own smaller box, bringing it back. "Let's burn them."

"Oh-ho! Do I get to see before we do?" He looked a bit excited, as though he wanted to know Kyo's dirty sexual secrets.

Kyo quietly handed over the box. "Go for it."

Die took the box from Kyo and opened it, slowly starting to remove things from inside, a small frown on his face as he pushed through the razor blades. He pulled out the photo of him and Kyo, smiling softly and setting it aside on the dresser before thinking about it and giving Kyo a slightly horrified look. "Were you..." he took a deep breath and forced himself to say it, "were you doing this because... of us not being a thing?" He rooted through the rest, wincing a bit at the coke picture, not really caring so much about the blowjob one or the ex-girlfriends. He placed it all back in the box and then picked up the photo on the dresser, looking at it, wondering where the pain in this memory was.

Kyo watched Die remove the contents of the box. Some he'd honestly forgotten. He frowned at the razor blades, his hand scratching at his arm almost unconsciously. "I...maybe." He cleared his throat then looked at the picture Die was holding, an odd look on his face.

Die studied Kyo for a few long moments before reaching out for him and tugging him down on his lap, the box on the bed, picture still in his hands. He leaned in and kissed the side of Kyo's mouth ever so gently. "Talk to me, baby... tell me... free this from your soul."

Kyo allowed Die to pull him down then curled into his lap. He licked his lips and sighed softly. "You know, that night...we all went to whatever after-party, something I hadn't done in a long while...This was taken early in the night but later, after a few shots and a bump in the bathroom, I came back, and I think I basically started to admit to needing help…but this chick came by and you were gone before I could even get the first words out. After that, I left and nearly OD'd on the stuff out of my own misery."

Die pulled Kyo close while he spoke, lightly stroking over the back of his hair, his hand never faltering, never giving away the tears that came to his eyes at the admission. He turned his head and lightly kissed Kyo's earlobe. "I'm so sorry, baby... I know I can't change the past... but I wish I'd been there for you that night... I wish I hadn't thought I was all alone... and more than anything, I wish you'd known a long time ago that it has always been me that's taken care of you when you needed it... but I just..." he shook his head a little, "Sometimes I couldn't see past my own pit of despair. Sometimes I felt barely tied to reality, and sometimes I felt like I'd just float away if I so much as told a soul what was wrong with me. And through that... I failed to see when you really, truly needed me." He tossed the picture into the box and pulled back, studying Kyo for a moment. "If we're going there... then... well... closet, bottom left. There's a book and a small leather bag under it. Grab them, will you?"

Kyo clung to Die, his hand moving to squeeze his lover's thigh a little too hard. After listening to Die, he bit his lip hard, swallowing thickly. He hated knowing that while he was in his own hell, Die was suffering too. He looked up at Die's request then nodded, going to find the book and small bag, taking them out to Die then curling right back up in his lap.

Die slid his arm around Kyo's waist when he got back, opening the bag and dumping the contents into his own box, a few blue pills and a lighter that he'd used to carry all the time in it. Then he gestured to the book. "Open it. You deserve to know. Sharing... fair is fair."

Kyo stared at the blue pills and lighter then flicked his eyes to Die's face before opening the book. He flipped through the pages, his frown growing more with each one and pain squeezed around his heart as he read every hateful word Die had ever written about himself. About halfway through, he found Die's hand and held onto it tightly. He carried on, wincing at the pictures of Die being painfully thin, having never realized it had gotten so bad. At the end, he closed the book and set it aside before turning and wrapping his arms tightly around Die. "You're beautiful. Don't ever fucking think otherwise again," he murmured out, his voice a bit shaky.

Die wrapped Kyo tight in his arms and kissed the top of his head ever so gently. "I honestly... I found myself one day. It happened all by myself, and I realized there was this horrible pit in my soul and that I was hating myself outwardly because I was lying to myself inwardly. When I admitted what I did about my sexuality, it relieved so much of the hatred. It's still hard sometimes... but it's not that level anymore. It's a lingering effect of what I did to myself, how I trained myself rather than anything else."

Kyo nodded, holding onto Die. "I'm glad you found your way out...I need you. Selfish as that may sound, I need you here, with me...always."

"It got really bad..." Die reached out, taking the book and opening it by memory, handing the single opened page back to Kyo. "That night... do you really want to know this?"

Kyo shifted and looked at the book again, taking it from Die. "Yes, if you need to let out...then yes."

"You'll be the only person I ever tell this to. Please never repeat it unless I'm in that pit again somehow and need professional help. Are we clear?"

Kyo nodded tersely. "Absolutely."

Die took a deep breath. "There was this month in which I was spiraling downward like crazy. I started with the Adderall, and I was eating maybe 300 calories a day, drinking water to offset the hunger. I'd even cut out all alcohol, and I was having horrible withdrawals, but I couldn't tell the difference between those and the hell I was putting myself through. I weighed in 42kg on the 1st of the month. And then I was introduced to purging by my then girlfriend. She did it to stay in a size four, otherwise she was a six and got teased by her girls." He adopted a far-away look, the emotion thinner than before, as though he were cutting himself off from the emotion of the memory as he retold it. "I started doing it on the third. By the end of the month, I was at 37kg and the thinnest I've ever been. I looked worse than any of those photos. My stomach was so sunk in, I could see the lumps of my organs under the skin. I could feel each one and every single bone in my body stuck out. It hurt to sit, to walk, to play... my guitar strap bruised me to the point I had a black stripe over my shoulder that wouldn't go away. I threw up about five times a day and ate only one bowl of white rice per day, fourteen glasses of water, and I was taking laxatives." He shook his head a little. "I passed out one night after a show... in my car... while I was driving." His lips pursed into a thin line. "I wrapped the car around a light post and luckily since I was out, I was just bruised up, nothing more. No one else got hurt. But…I realized I was killing myself. The blackout was a result of my body dying so slowly on the inside. They did my test that night and my BMI was 11.48... anything under 18 is anorexic. I had less than 2% body fat, which means I had nothing left to burn."

The story broke Kyo's heart in a million pieces. To think his Die had ever been so horridly thin and sick made him feel incredibly guilty for not noticing it. News of the car wreck made his eyes widen in shock. This was something he'd never heard about it. "Jesus, Die..." He reached up and stroked his hand over Die's face. "I'm sorry I didn't know..."

"No one else does either. I just... I kept it to myself. My lowest of the low. And the thing is... even that didn't turn it all around. I just stopped purging." He shook his head. "It took the turn-around of my way of thinking about myself in other ways to make me realize I was taking it out on myself."

Kyo nodded, frowning still. "Was there....ever a point when you wanted out?"

Die stared past Kyo for a moment and then came back to himself, giving Kyo a long look. "The truth is, yeah... there's times I wanted to die so fuckin' bad it hurt. But then I would always think of you..." his hand came up to rest on Kyo's cheek, "that you needed me around to patch you up and keep you running. That without me, you'd fall apart and no one would take my place."

Kyo stared at Die, his jaw clenched hard. "Thank Gods for my fucked up-ness...hm?" He bit out a laugh then rested his forehead against Die's chest, shaking his head, really unable to say anything for fear of crumbling into an emotional heap.

Die gathered Kyo closer to himself and pressed hard kiss after kiss against the other's neck and shoulder. He squeezed a bit harder than necessary before whispering, "You saved my life, and you never knew it... but you did." He pressed another kiss to Kyo's ear and then pulled back enough to smile softly at him. "But it's the past, baby. I'm so happy now... I've... I've never known anything like this before, and it's glorious. Even our low moments, even the arguments or the fucked up things... even that's heaven in comparison to pieces of the past to me." He ran his fingertips lightly over Kyo's cheek. "I love you... now let's go burn the shit out of these horrible memories, rid ourselves of the burden, yes?"

Kyo dragged his fingers through Die's hair, clinging to him for dear life for a moment, feeling as though he were drowning. "I'm...I cannot express how happy you've made me, Die. I love you, so very much my Koi." He leaned in to press his lips to Die's before nodding. "Yeah, it'll be like a cleansing...."

Die smiled softly at his lover, lightly flicking his fingers under his chin. "You're amazing." He gently removed Kyo from his lap and then got up, dumping everything into his larger box and then picked up a small incense holder with a single stick from beside the door. "C'mon."

Kyo actually blushed a little the stood, following Die. "Where shall we do it?"

"Back patio in the metal bucket for cigarettes that I've never had occasion to use." He led the way downstairs and then out, going straight to the bucket and dumping the entire contents into the bucket. He picked up the fluid from on top of the BBQ grill and squirted it on it before lightly the incense with the lighter from his box and setting it down beside it. He crouched down and gestured Kyo over. "Come. Kneel."

Kyo hummed and went with Die outside, watching him dump the box. At Die's bidding, he moved and kneeled beside the bucket, placing one hand on Die's knee.

Die reached to curl his fingers over Kyo's own. "All the fuck ups, all the shit, all the pain. Burn it all away." He flicked the lighter on and tossed it in the bucket, watching as it ignited willingly.

Kyo nodded then offered up a silent prayer to the heavens for their continued happiness together. He watched the fire grow and the things within the bucket slowly turn to ash.

Die watched everything burn until the embers were dying in the bucket. He let out a soft laugh. "Shall we put it out like men?"

Kyo turned to look at Die, blinking a little as he'd slipped into his own mind a bit. "You mean piss on it? Why the hell not...it's a fitting way. Piss on the past." He chuckled and pushed himself to his feet.

"My thoughts exactly." Die stood up as well, finally letting go of Kyo's hand and unzipping, pushing his underwear aside just enough to expose the tip of his dick, but nothing more, spreading his legs for stability, and then glancing at his lover, waiting on him to be ready.

Kyo grinned a little then fished his cock out of his track pants and boxers, aiming for the bucket and nodding his head. "Okay, ready."

Die took in a little breath before canting his hips forward a little bit, his stream hitting the side of the bucket. He readjusted a bit and hit dead center.

Kyo focused on pissing directly into the center as well, though he was aiming rather than trusting his stream not to come back and drip on his pants. The embers hissed and smoke as their collective urine doused the flame, nothing left but muddy ashes now.

Die finished up, shook off, and tucked himself back in, zipping up. He moved behind Kyo, sliding his arms around the other's waist, careful not to get in the way, nuzzling into his neck. "I love you."

Kyo finished shortly after Die's arms slid around him and he smiled, shaking off and tucking away before leaning back into his lover. "I love you, too. Koi."

Die's hand slid over the other's stomach, lightly holding him there. "Let it all go, baby... float away into the clouds."

Kyo turned his head slightly to press his face against Die's neck, taking a deep breath then releasing it slowly. "I feel...relieved."

"Good... me, too." He lightly ran his hand through Kyo's hair, just loving doing that tonight. "C'mon... let's share a beer and sit on the couch."

Kyo smiled. "Mm, sounds good." He turned to and headed into the house, pulling Die along by the hand. He went to the fridge and got the beer, handing it to Die then moving into the living room, curling up on the couch and waiting.

Die followed after him, a little smile on his lips as he accepted the beer. He paused by the couch, fishing his keys out and cracking open the beer, tossing the cap on the table. He debated for a moment and then settled himself on Kyo's lap, leaning a lot against the arm of the couch, but in his lap nonetheless. He took a swig from the beer and passed it over to Kyo, pulling up his shirt and gazing down at his belly. After a moment, he took Kyo's free hand and placed it on the slight bump there, his lips quirking upward ever so slightly. "You helped me get here."

Kyo let out a soft sound when Die settled in his lap but he smiled up at him, readjusting a bit. He sipped the offered beer and smirked up at Die as he rubbed his belly. "Mm, I'm glad. I love it. You're beautiful anyway but with the meat on your bones it's even better. You're radiant now." He stroked his hand over Die's stomach lovingly.

Die smiled a little, his long fingers gently caressing his lover's own as he touched his stomach. "Thank you, love." He let out a soft hum and then murmured, "You're the first person I've ever felt completely comfortable naked with. I just thought you should know that."

Kyo looked up at Die then shifted, bending to press his lips to Die's stomach before sitting back up and peering at him. "I appreciate that...so much more than you could know..."

Die let out a soft laugh when he had the other press that kiss against his skin. "Tickles a bit... Mr. stubbly." He brushed his hand over Kyo's cheek and then waggled his tongue at him. "C'mere. Gimme sugar."

Kyo laughed and leaned in, pressing his lips firmly to Die's. "Mmm...I thought you liked my stubble."

"Never said I didn't." He let out a soft laugh and shook his head.

Kyo grinned then kissed Die a bit more deeply, pushing his fingers into his hair.

"I love you," he murmured out before he groaned and then kissed him back a little more desperately. After a moment, he pulled back from it and gently cupped Kyo's cheek. "I'm glad we did that."

Kyo nibbled at Die's lip then leaned into his touch. "I love you, too…and I'm glad as well...it felt like a true release."


	49. Chapter 49

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

As much as Die wanted to be happy and upbeat for the night, he wasn't. He had grown steadily more and more upset as the past week had passed him by and now, he sat in the closed bathroom, his head in his hands, eyes closed tight against the world outside. Certain things were eating at him and not one of them had a thing to do with Kyo. No...his relationship was picture perfect. But his job... his life... his career was on the rocks, and he hated it more than anything else. But, the truth of it was, it wasn't the whole aspect of the job, either. He loved being a guitarist, and he loved his bandmates dearly. The music they produced was like heaven to him. And when Kyo or Kaoru spoke of Dir en grey being their all... he knew well what that felt like, because it was the same for him as well in a great many ways.

But the past week had been full of the kind of news Die didn't like and couldn't reconcile with in any kind of way. Tours were being set up and the extras being decided upon. When Die had tried to contribute his two cents worth, he'd been brushed off and told it was "label" stuff and not to stick his nose in it. That alone had shaken him pretty badly, but the fact that what was actually meant was that he had to go along with whatever was decided, no matter how rude it came off, just really ticked him off. So far, they'd rolled down three things he knew he shouldn't know yet, but had overheard, that sincerely pissed him off and made him half ashamed to be a part of such a thing.

And then there was the stress that their past two pay periods had been virtually ignored. CDs just weren't making as much money anymore, and no matter how many times Die tried to tell someone that they needed to open up the other horizons, sell in other markets, and go digital... and maybe not charge such insane amounts for the CD to start with, he was told to "leave the thinking to the men with the brains," which just told him that they considered him stupid. An object to be posed and moved and not a person with feelings and desires. 

So here he was, sitting inside the bathroom, trying to hold back the way he felt long enough to get through what was supposed to be a nice dinner with Kyo... a date after a while of not doing such things. But the bitter taste in this mouth told him he was bound to ruin it all at the drop of a hat and that alone nearly brought him to tears.

Kyo was not completely oblivious to Die's downturn in mood over the past few days, and while he was concerned, he wasn't really sure how to even go about asking his lover what was wrong. In fact, every time he attempted to bring it up, Die was suddenly talking about something else or ready to go to sleep or some other form of distraction that prevented the conversation from continuing on. The vocalist had had no choice but to let it be for the moment and continue on as if nothing was wrong. He had just hoped that by the time their romantic evening rolled around, Die would be in better spirits. 

Now it was said evening, and he was in the bedroom, getting ready. He had already dressed in dark khaki slacks, a black button up and gray suede vest. He put the finishing touches on his hair then finally headed towards the bathroom to take care of some last minute business and see if Die was out of his shower. 

He was greeted with a locked door when he got there and that made him frown. They never locked one another out. He bit his lip then raised his hand, knocking lightly. "Die? Are you alright? The door's locked..."

Die shifted slightly on the toilet lid, raising his head to stare at the door when Kyo knocked. At the words, he winced and looked away. Swallowing thickly, he did his best to suck it up and then went to the mirror to peer at himself a bit, making sure he hadn't fucked up his hair too badly by sticking his hands through it. He slid his hands down the sides of his black silk shirt that he'd left open on the top three buttons, the tight black khaki's built to make him look like actually had an ass for once. He closed his eyes for a second and then turned to open the door. "Sorry, I didn't mean to. Hit the button." He leaned in and lightly pecked Kyo's cheek before slipping past him.

Kyo stared at the door for a few moments, waiting on Die to say or do something. He was about to knock again when the door opened and his lover leaned in to kiss his cheek before exiting the room. Kyo frowned, confused at Die's actions. He pursed his lips and quickly took care of business before washing his hands and going into the bedroom. "Die, what gives? You're acting....well, odd."

Die was leaning over his dresser, trying to decide what necklace he wanted to wear out of the vast collection. He'd just righted himself, holding onto one of the oldest Chrome Hearts pieces he owned: the simple, tiny cross. Shifting a little, he reached to fasten it around his neck and then picked up a strappy leather bracelet, fastening it on while Kyo spoke. He paused when Kyo finished, his hand hovering over his little ring drawer, a frown on his face. So he wasn't hiding it as much as he should have been.

He sighed softly and just shook his head. "I don't want to ruin tonight...and please, just know it's not us at all, okay? We're perfect... and frankly, the glue holding me together at this point." He turned a bit to try to give Kyo a reassuring look before going back to his rings, digging around.

Kyo watched Die then pursed his lips at his explanation. He hated the way Die held things back in favor of the mood of whatever was going on. He sighed and moved to stand behind his lover, wrapping his arms around him and hugging him tight. "Okay, well...if you insist....I'm ready and the car will be here soon." Kyo had gone out of the way a little to rent a town car for the evening so they could both relax and drink if they wanted.

Die closed his eyes when Kyo put his arms around him. He'd asked for tonight... he'd wanted it desperately, and now he felt like he was going to ruin it. All he had to do was be strong until tomorrow, keep the tides at bay one last day. He lightly ran his hand over Kyo's fingers, feeling the ring he'd given the other there and clutching his hand close for a few moments.

He took a deep breath and then let it out, finally reaching into the jewelry box and extracting a few different rings, including the engagement ring from Kyo off the dresser from his usual pile, putting them on his fingers. He ran his hand around Kyo's hip and then reached for one of Kyo's brightly colored ankle bracelets, kneeling down, and reaching to fasten it around Kyo's ankle as he nuzzled lightly against his thigh.

Kyo pressed a kiss to Die's shoulder when he felt fingers stroke over the ring on his left hand. A soft smile graced his lips as he watched Die slide the matching one onto his own finger. When Die knelt down, he was slightly confused but then realized what his lover was doing and let out a soft laugh, reaching down to gently stroke Die's face. "Mm, thank you. I'd forgotten about it..."

Die leaned into Kyo's touch, his eyes closed as he finished fastening the links together. Once he was done, he lightly slid his fingertips over Kyo's ankle before sliding his hand up the other's leg and peering up at him. "I love you with all my heart."

Kyo peered down at Die, smiling a little before bending at the waist and kissing his lover gently. "I love you just the same, Koi." He lingered there for a moment until he heard a horn sound outside. "That'll be our ride....if you want to go...if not, I can send them away."

Die's lips parted in slight protest, a sad look drifting over his face. But after a moment, he schooled himself back into happy-mode and shook his head. "No, I want to go. I really do." Standing up, he held out his hand. "Please believe me?"

Kyo sighed softly and nodded, taking Die's hand. He didn't believe him for a moment but there was no point in arguing about it right then. Whatever was eating at his lover was just going to have to stew until Die was ready to spill. "Alright then. Let's go." 

He picked up his shoes and led the way down the stairs and to the front where he bent down and got his shoes on. Once that was done, he slipped his wallet into his back pocket then added his keys to the front pocket. He looked up at Die and offered a half-smile before opening the door and waving his hand. "After you, love."

Die was quick about getting downstairs and putting his boots on. He slid sunglasses over his eyes, despite the fact that it was nearly nightfall, knowing well enough he might need them for several reasons. He double-checked on his phone and his wallet and then stepped out the door when Kyo opened it. He made his way to the car and slid into the backseat when the door was opened for him.

Kyo shut and locked the front door before following after Die, nodding to the driver and murmuring the address of their destination before slipping into the car as well, settling in the middle seat so that he was right against Die.

Die slid his arm around Kyo's shoulder when the other settled next to him, reaching to secure both of their seatbelts with his free hand, ensuring his lover was buckled in first, then himself. Kyo smiled when Die buckled him in, finding it endearing that his lover always put him first. He settled against Die, trying to put his worry out of his mind for now. For a long while, Die didn't say a word, almost afraid to given their prior conversation. After a while though, he finally offered a quiet, "I really do need tonight."

Kyo was watching the road, calculating how far away they were when Die interrupted his thoughts. He looked up at him and nodded a little. "Mm, I know, baby. I just hope it's...what you had in mind."

Die squeezed Kyo close a bit and then murmured, "It's already what I had in mind."

Kyo hummed, finding and squeezing Die's hand tightly. "Good. It'll be another 15 minutes..."

"That's fine with me," Die returned softly, not even trying to think of where they were going. He shifted enough to cross his legs and then tilted his head back, closing his eyes behind his shades, and attempting to get rid of his problems through will alone.

Kyo shifted and started rubbing Die's leg as they rode along. His thoughts drifted and soon they were coming to a stop behind a non-descript building. To any passers-by, it held no interest but to those that knew what it was, it was a sanctuary of sorts. 

The drive came around and opened the door for them and Kyo unbuckled and slid out, waiting for Die to join him. He informed the driver to be back in 2 hours though they may be a bit longer. It was hard to tell.

Die slipped out of the car when it came to a stop, not really paying attention to where they were just yet. He straightened his shirt again and then wet his lips as he waited on Kyo to lead the way.

Kyo linked his arm with Die's and lead him up to the door where a staff member was waiting. "Mr. Niimura, Mr. Andou, it's lovely to see you again! Please come in! We have your room reserved just as you requested." The staff member bowed then turned and walked off down the carpeted hallway, leading them past several different partitioned areas and rooms, all of which seemed to be occupied. 

Finally, they were lead into a room of their own, this one decorated in modern Japanese style. The table was western-style and made of dark wood and set with delicately patterned plates. The lighting was bright enough to eat by but fairly dim to keep the atmosphere romantic. There was a bottle of Die's favorite sake, chilling on ice as well as cups for them to drink it from. 

Kyo waited until they were alone, the staff member having bowed and exited for the time being. "Well, what do you think?"

Die looked a little shocked when he heard his name and then, slowly, it dawned on him where they were. He smiled softly then and clutched Kyo a bit closer, feeling like this was okay. 

When they came into the room, Die instantly saw the sake, one of the few served cold rather than hot and he was surprised, given the price on a single bottle. But he supposed they were allowed to splurge on events such as this, given how rare they were.

He moved to pull out a seat for Kyo, gesturing him to it and then leaning in to kiss him lightly on the cheek. "I adore you for this in so many ways." With that, he went to his own seat and settled down, reaching for the bottle and opening it, pouring some into both cups.

Kyo smiled and relaxed a little when Die seemed to brighten up a bit. He settled in his seat and, once Die was finished pouring, took his cup, holding it up. "To a lovely evening..."

Die took his cup in hand and lightly clinked it to Kyo's own. "To us." Mentally, he added, and to me not fucking up and crying halfway through dinner to the end of it. He took half the cup back and then settled it on the table. "So did you plan the meal or are we going with menu options?"

Kyo took a sip of his drink then shook his head. "I took the liberty of ordering miso and gyoza for an appetizer, but I thought you'd like to choose your own meal. They should bring the menus with the appetizers."

"You know me well," Die returned quietly, finally reaching to pull his sunglasses off, putting them on the front of his shirt, letting them hang there for the time being.

Kyo smiled a bit and reached over to squeeze Die's hand. "I like to think so..." He lingered there for a moment, only pulling away when there was a knock at the door and a petite waitress entered carrying their miso and dumpling as well as menus. She quietly set everything up then bowed, exiting again with a word.

Die watched as the woman came in and then gave her a half-bow in return, as well as a quiet thank you before she disappeared. He pulled the menu over and quietly flipped through the pages. Settling it back down, he reached for the miso soup and dug in with gusto. "They have my favorite," he offered to Kyo.

Kyo grinned a little, selecting a dumpling and eating it before picking up the menu, glancing at it. He quickly decided on a vegetable dish that originated in Kyoto. "Mm, I knew they would..."

Die grinned a little at that and then finished off his bowl of soup, pushing it aside and drinking down the rest of his cup of sake, choosing not to get anymore for the time being, not wanting to be wasted tonight.

Kyo set aside his menu and focused on his own soup, eating it quickly then leaning back with a sigh. "Mm, so good. Did you know that you can actually tell them the kind you'd like and they'll serve you that instead?"

Die arched an eyebrow at the other. "Seriously?" He smirked and then reached to pinch the bridge of his nose a little, the first feelings of a headache settling in. Definitely not what he needed when they were out somewhere.

 

The vocalist took a sip of his sake then grabbed another dumpling. He flicked his eyes at Die and grinned a little. "Yeah, really." The way Die pinched his nose made him frown and he reached out to hold Die's hand. "Are you okay, baby? Allergies again..?"

With a wince, Die nodded. "This year is killing me. I'm worried about how many pills I'm taking to try to make it stop, but without them I turn into a horrible ball of discomfort."

Kyo gave Die a sympathetic look, shaking his head. "You're going to have to start wearing a mask more often, especially on days the pollen's especially high." He shifted then looked a bit worried. "You don't think it's the cats, do you?"

Die looked a bit alarmed at the possibility that it could be his babies. "...No?" He made the most epic of horror-stricken faces. "I hope not."

Kyo winced and shook his head. "Well...I guess we could lock them out of the bedroom for a week or so and see if that helps? And if it does, then...maybe we'll just have to vacuum a lot more and keep them brushed." He wasn't willing to get rid of them; the little fur-balls had grown on him.

Die nodded a bit and then settled again. "Change all the linens out and then hope real hard it wasn't the cats."

Kyo nodded and finished off his sake. Shortly after, their waitress returned to take their orders. She took Kyo's first then turned to Die, asking him what he'd like.

Die ordered a bay roll to share and then a small pasta bowl type thing, just feeling more adventurous than eating everything he normally would have. The waitress took Die's order then nodded to them both, informing them that their meals would be out in less than 15 minutes before darting back out the door, once again leaving them in peace. 

Kyo waited until she was gone then reached out and took Die's hand. "So, as this is a date, I feel the need to tell you that you look very nice this evening."

Instantly, Die's face heated up and he ducked his head. "Thank you, love. You look stunning as well."

Kyo chuckled lowly and then shifted, leaning over the table to kiss Die's cheek. "Thank you."

Die looked slightly thrilled by that, reaching for the bottle and pouring them some more. "This is amazing, I have to say. I'm honored that you remembered this place and even more so that you ordered this particular drink for us."

Kyo settled back in his seat and grinned, looking a little pleased with himself. "Well, I enjoyed the effort you put into making that one night so special, and this place is just...perfect for that. As for that drink, it's one of the few I truly enjoy so why not splurge a bit, hm?"

"Really? You like it, too?" He smiled at that, happy his lover liked something as much as he did, even if it was as simple as alcohol.

Kyo chuckled at that, nodding. "Yeah, I do. I just never really got around to saying so." He loved seeing his lover's face light up, glad that he could brighten his mood, even for a moment.

"It's one of my top five," Die returned, finally reaching for a gyoza, dunking it in the broth and then pushing it into his mouth, quietly enjoying the treat.

Kyo nodded, selecting another gyoza and dipping it into the sauce. He popped it into his mouth, savoring it before washing it down with the rest of his sake. "I remembered you saying that at one point...which is why I selected it."

"I love you, darling... for so many reasons." Die grinned and then settled back, thankful that for the time being, he'd shifted his focus from his problems.

Kyo grinned and settled, licking his lips. "I love you, too, Daisuke." He let out a sigh of content then looked around the room, his eyes focusing on the small bamboo fountain in the corner.

A few more minutes slid past and their main dishes arrived. Die quietly asked for some water as well and that was brought back rather quickly.

Kyo waited until they were once again completely alone to make eye contact with Die. "You're perfect." He smiled then made a quick little bow over his food before digging in, letting out a happy sound at the delicious flavors of it.

Die smiled at that, not responding, but instead drinking some of his water, and then picking up one of his two pieces of sushi and tasting it, an interesting look on his face.

Kyo watched Die try the sushi, his eyebrow raised. "Is it good? Or did you accidentally get raw?"

Die finished off the piece and then shrugged. "I know it has crab in it, but it's not bad. Two of those are yours by the way."

Kyo hummed a little then smiled, reaching over to take one of the pieces. He pushed it into his mouth and ate it, mming as he swallowed. "It's pretty good, thank you."

"I thought we should share something... it's a bit... traditional in other countries." Die laughed softly and shrugged. "Call me strange."

Kyo gave his lover a little smile then shook his head. "I don't think it's strange, love. I think it's sweet."

"Mmm... good. See this is why you're such a keeper. You put up with my weirdness and think it's amazing somehow."

Kyo let out a loud laugh at that, shaking his head. "Your weirdness compliments my weirdness, so I think we've got a mutual weirdness, and that's why we work."

"Yes, that." Die sat back a bit and grinned, wetting his lips slightly before he finally picked up his fork and began to roll up some pasta on his fork.

Kyo chuckled again then delved into his food, eating the lightly seasoned vegetables one at a time.

A few more minutes of silence went by, and finally Die had finished up about half of his meal. He took another sip of the sake and then downed some water just after it.

Kyo quietly enjoyed his food, mentally appreciating the atmosphere and Die's company as he ate. After a while, he leaned back and picked up his own glass of water, sipping from it then peering at Die.

Die leveled his lover with a saucy look and then chuckled. "Just enjoying the view or plotting against me?"

Kyo smirked widely and leaned forward, resting his chin on his fingertips. "I'm plotting against you, of course...but I'm also enjoying the view while I plot."

Die countered by leaning forward as well. "Oh yeah? What sort of thing are we plotting against me for this time?"

Kyo slicked his tongue over his bottom lip, his eyes growing a bit darker. "What would you say if I wanted to make full use of the privacy screen in the car and...well...have dessert there?" He chuckled a little at his own innuendo, knowing it was a bit lame but not wanting to be overly lewd at the table like this.

Die's eyebrows instantly rose and then he grinned, actually looking slightly embarrassed for the first time in what seemed like forever. "I'd say you know the exact path to my... uh... heart."

Kyo just grinned before reaching out and swiping his thumb over the corner of Die's mouth, gathering a minute amount of sauce. "You missed a little something there..." He put the digit between his own lips, sucking it clean.

"Maybe I just left it there so you'd have to touch me," Die retorted, chuckling just after.

Kyo wiped his thumb on a napkin then laughed. "Is that so? You should have left a bit more then..."

Die gestured at the bowl. "Still half a meal left. We can share it later... once we've... worked this half off." He fought to keep his face straight.

Kyo licked his lips then bit his tongue to keep from saying something inappropriate at that point. He simply nodded and gestured towards the sake. "We'll take that home as well..."

"It's nice to have privileges... most people wouldn't be allowed." He winked and then tilted his head back a bit, his headache starting in larger now. Now... was not the time.

Kyo snorted a bit. "With as much as I paid for it, they should send it home in a diamond encrusted case." He grinned but it slid off his face when he saw the way Die was leaned back. "Head still hurting, baby?"

Die winced a bit. "Yeah... I just need to take something, that's all. I have one of those nasty packets of stuff at home, but... it's at home. Convenient, right?"

Kyo frowned then stood up, going to the service phone by the door. He pushed the button for the front desk and informed them of what he needed. Luckily, they had some on site and said they'd be right there with it. He thanked them and hung up, going to sit back down but sitting next to Die instead. "They're bringing some..."

Die watched Kyo, his head tilted a bit. He sniffed and then let out a soft laugh. "All kinds of service I suppose, hmm?"

Kyo nodded and finished off his water. "Indeed. I believe you said they would go above and beyond for their customers..." He was about to say more but the door opened and their waitress appeared with a package of the headache medicine Die needed as well as more water. Kyo informed her that they needed to-go boxes as well as a bag and she hurried off to acquire said items.

Die thanked her quietly and then opened the baggie, dumping it into the small glass of water and picking up his unused spoon to stir it with. Once it was dissolved, he made a face and then knocked it back like the expert shot-taker he was.

Kyo watched Die take the medicine, wrinkling his nose at the thought. "I don't think I could stand taking it like that. I'm too used to my pills..."

Die put the glass down and took the rest of his cup of sake before huffing out a breath. "I have to. When I get a headache it's never small, and it needs the hard hit of this shit."

Kyo frowned and nodded, reaching over to squeeze Die's hand. "I know, baby. I'm sorry you're getting one now. Hopefully that wards it off." 

They sat for a few moments until the waitress came back and quickly boxed up their leftovers and the sake, putting them into a bag and then quietly handing Kyo the check. 

Kyo looked up at Die then gestured towards the check. "Did you want anything else, babe?"

Die glanced at him and then nodded. "Four chocolate covered strawberries. Two white, two dark. I'll pay for those though. Cash." He smiled a bit.

Kyo smiled and handed the girl his credit card and she informed Die of the cost of the strawberries then took off once again to get them.

Die found the proper amount of money from his wallet and put it out on the table for the strawberries, smiling a bit at Kyo. "They're super good."

Kyo smiled and nodded, shifting back a bit. "I remember from the last time...though I think we were rather...distracted at the time."

Die chuckled. "That we definitely were. So... no eating these in the car then, hmm?"

Kyo smirked, opening his mouth to say something but then shut it firmly when the waitress came back with his card and the strawberries, two extra dark chocolate covered ones added to the package. He handed her the cash for them as well as adding on a hefty tip before signing the receipt and handing her that as well. 

"Ready to go then? No rush..."

Die thanked her quietly and then shifted in his seat, chuckling a bit at Kyo's questioning. "Mmm... I think I'm ready to go."

Kyo grinned and stood up, holding out his hand for Die. "Then let's go and..." He lowered his voice, leaning more towards Die. "....soil the backseat of that car."

Die almost choked on air when Kyo said soil the backseat of the car. He was pretty sure that Kyo didn't really mean it in the way his mind took it, but it was still worthy of the picture at least.

Kyo's grin only widened at Die's reaction. He didn't say anything further though, simply picking up their bag and leading the way down the hall and out the door. Their car was waiting for them and when they exited the building, the driver was quick to get out and open the door. 

Kyo slid into the back and buckled up then waited on Die, going ahead and pushing the privacy screen up.

Die took a moment to actually collect himself once they were outside, putting on his sun glasses because the lights from the streetlamps were hurting his eyes. He slid into the car and buckled up, quietly crossing one leg over the other and waiting on the door to be closed.

The driver asked their next destination, and Kyo told him their address. The door was shut, and they were soon on their way, Kyo's smirk still firmly in place.

With a soft sigh, Die pushed his glasses up on his head, the action pushing his hair back and making it frame his face in an oddly attractive manner. His tongue slid out and washed over his lips. Reaching over, he took Kyo's hand and squeezed it lightly in his own.

Kyo glanced over, watching Die's actions, biting his lip slightly. He glanced down at their hands before squeezing Die's and leaning over to press his lips to his cheek. "You are...so gorgeous."

"You know, I never get tired of you telling me that... it makes me happy every time." Die stretched his back a bit, a pop sounding from the action. "C'mere, you," he whispered out, moving his free hand to Kyo's cheek and gently pulling him in, kissing him gently.

Kyo grinned slightly then eagerly leaned in to kiss Die back, his hand moving to spear in his lover's hair, unafraid of mussing it up now that they were on the way home.

Die let out a soft groan as Kyo slid his hand into his hair. He bit his lover's lip lightly and then chuckled, pulling back just enough to talk. "Sometimes I think of the most messed up shit."

Kyo's tongue snaked out over his lip where Die just bit it then he chuckled lowly. "Oh? And what are you thinking of that's messed up?"

"That as many 'wrong' things as we've touched upon, we've never had someone eating someone else in an MV, that's what." Die chuckled a bit and then shrugged.

Kyo raised an eyebrow then cocked his head, his mind going back over the years of MVs. "Well, technically, there was the baby head fruit thing in Obscure...." He pulled back slightly and looked at his lover. "What made you think of that?"

Die considered it for a moment and then shrugged. "I guess I was more talking like... zombie level nomming." He laughed. "Mmm... I bit you and as... fucked up as it is... when I have migraines, my brain flits over things it normally doesn't, so... I thought how fucked up it would be if someone turned zombie all of a sudden during a kiss."

Kyo blinked a bit then snorted. "That's usually my department. I think you've been watching too much Walking Dead, Die." He shook his head and reached out, tweaking Die's nose.

Die snorted and batted at Kyo's hand. "Yes... well... perhaps." He sniffed and bit his lip a bit. "Mmm... so... weren't you going to seduce me, Mr. Sexy Pants?"

Kyo smirked again then shifted, running his hand over Die's cheek then down over his neck. "Mm, I was going to try..." He leaned forward, kissing the side of Die's mouth then trailed kisses along his jaw to his ear, pulling the lobe between his teeth lightly before murmuring lowly. "I have to be honest, before this night even started, all I could think about was the filthy things I'd like to do to you...which is slightly unfair, since this was supposed to be romantic..."

A soft laugh issued from Die at that, his hand coming up to spear into Kyo's hair. "Baby... you can do all the filthy things you want to me."

Kyo grinned against Die's ear, moving his mouth down to lick and suck the area just below it, for sure leaving a mark. "Good..." He moved his hand to unbutton another button on Die's shirt before slipping his fingers inside, caressing then scratching the skin there.

Die groaned at the way Kyo sucked on the skin just under his ear, the action going straight to his cock. He shuddered and arched upward as much as his belt would allow. "Jesus fuck, Kyo."

Kyo let out a small groan of his own at Die's reaction, absolutely loving it. He lathed his tongue over the spot then moved downward, trailing bites and licks along Die's throat. He changed directions and slide his tongue upwards, slicking it over Die's Adam's apple.

The moment Kyo's affections turned to his Adam's apple, Die's hips jerked again, and he all but crushed Kyo to him in an attempt to keep him there. The truth was he could cum from attention there alone, though he was sincerely embarrassed by such things.

Kyo was delighted to say the least about the way Die held him to his neck. He had no problem staying in that place, mouthing over Die's throat there then scraping it with his teeth as his hand dipped further into his shirt, finding and pinching his nipple.

Die allowed it to continue for quite a while before finally letting Kyo's head go, panting slightly as he tried to get himself back under control. His teeth worried his lower lip, and he let out a soft chuckle at the idea of the whole thing and what he was letting happen in the back of the car right in that moment.

Kyo finally relented once Die let go of his head. He lifted his own and looked at Die's face, licking his lips. "I will never grow tired of seeing your face that way, flushed and so full of desire." He scraped his nail over Die's nipple before removing his hand from his shirt only to place it in his lap, stroking over the obvious bulge in his pants.

All of the attention on various parts of Die's body was seriously getting him going. His hips bucked and his head fell back. "Feel like a fuckin' teenager," he hissed out just before laughing and shaking his head.

Kyo snorted and pulled back slightly, giving Die's length a squeeze. "Isn't that what 'necking' in the back of the car is all about?" He pulled his hand away and straightened up a bit. "But...I understand if you'd rather...cool your jets."

Die grunted in response. "It is... don't you fuckin' dare!" He reached to tug Kyo's hair, perhaps a bit harshly, his eyes narrowing.

Kyo felt Die's hair tug go straight to his cock, and all he could do was smirk before reaching down and unbuckling, working his way to the floor of the car between Die's legs, thankful for once of being short. "I love it when you're needy to the point of being a little forceful." He tugged the front of Die's shirt out of his pants, reaching to unbutton it the rest of the way before burying his face against his abdomen, nipping the tiny amount of bare skin there.

A soft gasp issued from the taller man as he leaned his head forward enough to watch what Kyo was doing. He gave a slight attempt at holding back the smirk that wanted out and shook his head slightly. "Only with you, baby... seriously."

Kyo flashed Die a grin then set to work on his belt, unbuckling it then pushing it out of the way before unbuttoning and unzipping Die's pants. He made short work of releasing his lover's length from the confining material, his hand stroking over the heated flesh.

"Fuck, Kyo," he whispered out, watching the other unfastening his pants. "Please... yes..."

Kyo shifted a bit then leaned forward, flicking his tongue over the head of Die's cock lightly, teasing him for the moment.

For a moment, Die tried to be subtle about it and then finally lost his grip on his mouth. "Fucking, just do it! I need this, please, oh god, suck my cock!"

Kyo's eyes shot up to Die's face, giving him a slightly surprised look before smirking. "Mmm, if you insist." He dropped his head down, taking most of Die's length in one go, swallowing around him then setting up a fast pace of bobbing his head, groaning.

Die groaned loudly as the other slid down on his cock. "Fuck yes!" He pushed his hand into the other's hair and bit at his lip, trying to contain some amount of his eagerness that way. Kyo grunted around Die's cock, his hand dropping to grope his own aching length as he worked in a way built to get his lover off quickly.

Die's hips bucked a bit, something he did intentionally for once, trying to see how far Kyo would let him push it this go around, though not aiming to do any damage for sure. "That's right," he hissed out, "suck me good."

Kyo groaned when Die hit the back of his throat then adjusted himself to take him nearly all the way down, swallowing around him then sliding his head up, scraping his teeth very lightly along the underside.

The light use of teeth was nearly Die's undoing, his lover seeming to intentionally target him in all the ways that would bring him off fastest. When he couldn't take it even a second longer, Die held Kyo's head in place, flexing and then letting his orgasm slide through him, getting the first shot down his lover's throat, the second on his tongue, and then pulling out, holding the base of his dick to shoot the rest over his lips and the bridge of his nose, having a thing for seeing Kyo wearing his cum. "Ah, yeah," he grunted out, "wear it."

Kyo groaned as Die lost it, swallowing the two shots that went in his mouth then closing his eyes as the rest spattered onto his face. Once Die was finished, he stroked him lightly, gazing up at him with cum dripping down his face. He smirked slightly, flicking his tongue out to catch some of it.

Die watched the other intently, waiting on him to open his eyes. When he did, he huffed out a slightly embarrassed laugh, his cheeks tinging vaguely pink. "I... uh..." he cleared his throat and pulled out a tissue from his pocket, handing it over to Kyo, "yeah...."

Kyo took the tissue and cleaned his face before shifting back up into his seat, leaning back to reveal a sizeable tent in his own pants. "We're nearly home now..." He blatantly groped himself then stopped, glancing over at Die.

Die swallowed a bit and then quickly tucked his softening length back in his pants. "I will most certainly take care of that… in any way you desire... once we are home." He eyed Kyo and then smirked.

Kyo grinned then shook his head, leaning over to draw Die into a deep kiss. "It's your game tonight, baby..."

Once they parted from the kiss and Kyo spoke, Die smirked at him. "And I desire making your sweet ass scream for more."

Kyo's eyes narrowed just slightly, desire written all over his face. "Mmm, I see..." He didn't much further than that with the thought before they were pulling up to their house. He was quick to get out and pay the driver, tipping him greatly for his service and discretion before turning and joining up with Die, leading him by the arm into the house.

Die chuckled at Kyo's reaction, quite happy to make him feel that way. He stepped out of the car and made sure they had their food before closing the door and heading to the house. Once Kyo had him inside, he ditched his shoes and then went for the kitchen, putting the leftovers away as well as the strawberries.

Kyo kicked out of his shoes and tugged his socks off, leaving them there for the time being. His vest came next, it landing on the back of the couch and by the time he reached the kitchen, his shirt was unbuttoned and his belt unfastened. "Running away, are we?"

"Putting the food away, not running away. And you should know by now, any chance I have to fuck the living hell out of you, I will." Die grinned, closing the fridge and rounding on Kyo, instantly reaching out and pushing him against the wall, one hand on his shoulder, the other in his hair. "Speak up. How do you want it?"

Kyo smirked then groaned when he was shoved against the wall, his cock twitching at the action. He licked his lips and reached out to draw Die closer with one hand on his hip, grinding against him. "Hard, fast, dirty..."

Die pressed his lips to Kyo's ear. "Define ‘dirty’, love." He shoved Kyo's pants down, a harsh contrast to the silken words he breathed out at the same time. Reaching between them, he unfastened his own pants, freeing his rapidly hardening cock from the confines of the material.

Kyo's laugh was cut short by a moan as his pants were pushed down, his cock springing free of its confines. "Mmm, use your imagination, baby..." He reached down, squeezing Die's cock a bit harshly.

Die's hand slid up to Kyo's throat, lightly running his nails over the flesh there. "I said define it," he breathed out once again, a dark sort of chuckle coming after it.

Kyo shuddered and groaned as Die's fingers slid over his neck. He licked his lips then looked up at Die. "I want you to fuck me right here in the kitchen, slap my ass, call me names then jizz all over me..."

"Fair enough," Die murmured out, leaning in to swipe his tongue over Kyo's cheek, just mostly to be slightly irritating than anything else. He backed up and informed, "Stay," before he padded off toward the living room and his lover's hidden bottle of lube. Such secrets were not actually secrets in the Andou-Niimura household. He came back in with it and gestured to Kyo. "Table now."

Kyo huffed a little and reached up to wipe his cheek off. He smirked at the command, tempted to break but ended up staying put. When Die returned with the lube, he chuckled and moved to the table, stepping out of his pants on the way. He laid over it with his ass sticking out and up, legs spread to brace himself. "Like this, Daisuke?"

"Yeah, just like that," Die murmured, taking in the lovely view of his lover's ass end so neatly in the air before him. "You've got the best ass in the entire world," he informed him. "Glorious. Gorgeous. Fuckin' amazing as all hell." He reached out and goosed it hard. "I think I'll make it red first."

Kyo wiggled said glorious ass for Die's pleasure. "Mmm...glad you think so." He chuckled again then let out an unmanly sound as Die goosed him, a huff coming out after.

The sound Kyo made only encouraged Die. Shifting to the side, he put the lube on the table and ran his hand over Kyo's tattooed back and then traced the edges of it that dipped down nearly to his ass. With an evil smirk, he began to spank him, his cock stiffening the rest of the way the instant he gave Kyo the first smack. Instantly, he decided he'd definitely found something else he really enjoyed and got off on.

Kyo shivered as Die's hands trailed down his back though he was suspicious of the light action given the current mood. He closed his eyes, waiting for what Die would do next. The smack to his ass caused him to let out an odd combination of a yelp and a moan, his cheeks flushing just after. "A-ahnn.."

Die bit down on his own lip rather harshly, delivering a second smack to the other cheek, and then alternating between the two, groaning in delight as Kyo's naturally tan skin began to turn pinkish under his actions.

Kyo let out a breathless gasp, his hips pushing back slightly. He hung his head down, groaning as Die assaulted his ass. "Hnng, Die...fuck!"

Die alternated between hard, outright smacks and little, quick swats to his behind, watching the skin color darker with each thing that he did, his cock throbbing with the excitement he felt from the actions. When he felt ready to nearly cum off of his actions alone, he relented, grabbing the lube and squirting it on his cock and then down the crack of Kyo's ass. A bit roughly - though not enough to actually do damage - he pushed two fingers inside the other and began to thrust them, giving little to no warning on the subject.

Kyo found himself leaking precum onto the table by the time Die let up. He shuddered and moaned when the lube ran down his crack, the coolness of it making goosebumps pop out on his heated flesh. Two fingers pushed into him roughly, and he was crying out, pushing back on them a little too eagerly. "Fuck!"

"Yes, you want this, don't you, baby?" Die chuckled. "I told you I was going to make you scream for me, didn't I?" Leaning down, he nipped at his ass cheek and then straightened, pulling his fingers free, and shoving his cock deep inside him with one swift movement.

Kyo opened his mouth to respond but only a scream came out as Die's cock pushed into him. He grappled for the edge of the table, holding onto it. "F-uck...DIE!"

Die grunted softly and reached to rub Kyo's lower back in case he was actually hurting him rather than giving him pleasure. He waited, feeling the signs of Kyo's body around him, finally deciding he only felt need and not actual pain. At that point, he began to move, not being slow or gentle about it, simply fucking hard and fast.

Kyo shuddered, finally shifting slightly to push himself up, giving him leverage to push back against Die and meet his thrusts. "Gods yes...fuck me Daisuke!"

"That's what I'm doing, you little pain in the behind," Die quipped, grinding hard against him for a moment before going back to thrusting quickly.

Kyo grunted, reaching back to grab Die's hip, scraping his nails over what skin he could before Die started moving again.

Die grasped Kyo's hand and pulled it behind his back, pinning it there as he continued to thrust. "How hard is your cock, baby?"

Kyo almost whined as his hand was pinned, preventing him from doing anything else. He lowered his front onto the table, huffing out a breath. "Achingly so...there's a puddle on the table..."

Die bit his lip at the information, pushing his hips hard against the other and then letting out a bit of an undignified sound at the information. He pulled his other hand and pushed it down to his cock. "Touch yourself... tell me what you're doing as you do it."

Kyo moaned and shifted, wrapping his hand around his cock, shivering at his own touch. He smeared the precum around then started stroking himself. "A-ah...I'm using my own pre as lube, stroking my hand up and down my cock...I'm absolutely rigid right down..."

Die smirked at the way Kyo was describing it, enjoying that greatly. He leaned down to nip at Kyo's shoulder, using quick, short thrusts instead for the time being. "Does your ass still hurt?"

Kyo whined a little, clenching his inner walls around Die a bit. "Hnng, slightly stinging but no..."

"Then I didn't do my job well enough," he hissed out, grasping Kyo's hips, short nails digging in. "Are you gonna cum, baby?"

Kyo slid his hand up and down the length of his cock, moaning lowly. "Maybe you didn't..." He bucked his hips, hissing out a sound . "I could at any moment..."

Die breathed out a soft, pleased sigh before shifting back and taking a firmer hold on Kyo's hips, really starting to go at him, heedless of anything but how hard he could fuck Kyo into the table.

Kyo shifted slightly, bringing one leg up to rest on a chair, putting Die at the perfect angle to ram right into his prostate. He held back as long as he could, a steady stream of cries and moans escaping him as he hovered at the peak. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore and reached under himself again to jerk his cock a couple of times hard and fast before letting out a loud cry of Die's name as he exploded onto the table, his vision going black from the force of it.

Die could feel how close Kyo was, and he bucked against him, panting loudly, his cock driving deep into the other, hips slapping harshly. And then Kyo was cumming, Die's head swimming with how hard Kyo clenched down on him in those last few seconds before he burst. "Fuck!" He all but hauled Kyo off the table, lowering him to the floor. Settling him face-up, he slid between his legs and smoothly entered him again. "Look at me," he whispered out, his body laboring over the other, his eyes fastened on Kyo's as he strove toward his own end. "Do you see?" he asked, a certain amount of desperation in his voice, "Do you see how much I love you?"

Kyo let out a sound of surprise as he was moved to the floor, his eyes going wide as he stared up at his lover. Die's words sent his heart skittering, a vague discomfort coming over him as Die pleaded with him. "O-of course..." He reached up to cup Die's cheeks, moaning softly as Die pushed into his overly sensitive body. "I..nng...love you, too."

Die was so close to his orgasm that he was almost in pain because of holding it off. But the moment he saw that look cross his lover's face, the one that meant he was uncomfortable with something, he knew he'd done something that he shouldn't have somewhere. Maybe he'd hurt him with the move or he'd said the wrong thing. Whatever it was, it yanked him so far back from the edge, he thought he'd never see orgasm ever again. He nearly went soft at the sense of dread that came down on him. 

The truth was he knew exactly why he was reacting so horribly to it. His downward spiral of depression and anxiety was like a raw, gaping pit that attached onto anything remotely negative and amplified it a thousand times. Not wanting to bother Kyo with it, he began to slowly back off from what he'd been doing, dropping his head and acting like he was working on his orgasm. But he slowly ramped it back down, eventually stopping completely and slipping free of Kyo's body, gently running his hands over the other's hips and side. "Did I hurt you?"

Kyo shivered as Die continued to push into him but within a second of his lover slowing down, he knew something had changed. When Die slipped from his body, he winced then looked back up at his lover, bringing his hands up to cup his face gently. "No, baby, not at all. Why would you think that? Are you okay?"

Die took in a deep breath and then for the first time in a very, very long time, he outright lied through his teeth. "I'm fine." He brushed his fingertips over Kyo's abdomen and then lightly patted his leg before standing up and hitching his pants and boxers back up. He held out a hand. "Shower?"

Kyo stared up at Die, the look on his face saying more than words ever could. He knew for a fact that Die was bullshitting. His lover hadn't cum, and that was beyond abnormal for Die. He frowned and got himself up but didn't move from the spot, his arms crossing over his chest. "Daisuke...," he warned, his voice low.

Die blinked at him, instantly knowing he was caught in his own lie. It was worse than his parents ever had been, Kyo knowing without even trying. He let out a sigh and shook his head a little, declining to change his answer for now. "Just... please... shower."

Kyo pursed his lips then sighed, nodding and reaching out to grasp Die's hand, leading the way to their bathroom. Once there, he silently moved to the shower and started the water to heating up, concern written all over his face.

Once they were in the bedroom, Die swallowed a bit and dislodged himself, going to take his clothing off. He left only the engagement ring on and then went back to the bathroom, stepping into the shower and quietly picking up the shampoo bottle.

He hadn't gotten much further, only lathering his hair up before the tears began to roll silently down his cheeks, and he just hoped to God that Kyo thought it was the water instead.

Kyo stood in the shower under the spray while waiting for Die. He watched his lover quietly begin to shampoo and then stop. His lips pressed in a thin line as he caught the slightest quiver of Die's shoulders. "Daisuke, darling, please...talk to me."

Finally at a loss as to what on earth to do with himself, Die simply slid down the wall into a seated position and leaned back, letting the water wash his hair out for him. "I just..." Die gestured a little, "Fuck, baby... everything's pouring down on me, and I get to this point," his voice cracked a bit, and he cleared his throat, gesturing, "this point where I can't even deal anymore. It happens... it's... been a long time, and I'm sorry you have to see this one, but... well... welcome to what Die-hell is."

Kyo watched Die slide down the wall and for a moment, his heart leapt into his throat, thinking the other was passing out or something. He swallowed and knelt down, peering at Die, feeling a bit of relief when the other began talking though not much, given the subject. 

"Die...what happened to, to bring this on? I mean....I know I get....into spells but...I usually have a trigger..."

"Everything... except us," Die replied quietly, closing his eyes. He sniffed a bit and then shook his head ever so slowly back and forth. "There's shit I just can't reconcile with happening at work, Kyo. Things are coming down that I shouldn't know, and I'm not okay with, but I have no choice. We have no choice. I feel like a dog on a choke-chain, and I just want to fucking scream... and I can't. I have to bend over and fucking take it, and I'm not... not okay with that at all."

Kyo reached out and placed his hands on Die's knees, frowning deeply. "Are you serious? Will you tell me what sort of things? What sort of hell they're inflicting on us now?"

Die was very quiet for a long few moments and then finally, "The start of the hell... do you have any idea how much they charged for the last album? The special version?"

Kyo thought back then shook his head. "No, I really don't...I assumed it was the usual extra...I mean..." He cleared his throat, making a mental note to check very soon.

"Seven thousand yen... and that's just the album. And they didn't release it on any other platform and didn't offer it in most other countries... and when I told them what they should do, they just ignored me. Told me to fucking," he scoffed and instantly looked more pissed off, "leave the thinking to the men with brains." His fingers trembled as he curled his hands into fists. "Seriously... they fucking called me stupid to my face!"

Kyo raised an eyebrow, anger boiling up inside him. "They...what?! That's...that's bullshit! This is OUR band! Yours, Kaoru's, Toshiya's, Shinya's and my band! Fuck them!"

Die shook his head violently. "That's not the worst, Kyo... God, that alone, I could have handled. I've been called stupid a lot. But damn it... it gets worse." He leaned forward and washed his hair out before leaning back again, more comfortable without the shampoo starting to itch. "They're pushing down some things I should never have overheard about our Europe tour, Kyo... and I can't stand behind what they're doing... but I can't exactly do anything about it either. But it's going to make us look like assholes."

Kyo shifted back while Die was washing out his hair, pulling down the seat and settling on it instead, reaching out to lightly stroke Die's shoulders. "Like...what? I haven't heard this news...."

"Of course you haven't. I was snooping and listening in on things I shouldn't have been I guess. I mean... it is my business, it's partly my band." He frowned a bit and looked down at the shower floor. "They're planning VIP things, and it's going to be an extra seventy eight thousand yen for it, which is ridiculous. And on top of that, they're going to be pretty much fucking us and the fans over all at the same time."

Kyo scoffed at the idea of so much extra cost for VIP tickets. He knew they needed to make money but for the fans, it was unfair, and he thought they could do things entirely differently. "Lovely....so are we not getting the usual handshake and photo bit while the rest of the crowd looks on? It was much better when it was more intimate...not that I attended many of those...but still..."

"Nope. They're talking like they're not even wanting people to talk to us, and they'll tell them that. I feel like a stinking piece of meat!" Die wrung his hands and then leaned over, pressing his face to his knees. "I'm gonna look so bad to them all. I'll look like an asshole, and they'll all hate me!"

Kyo felt physically nauseous at the idea. His hand found the top of Die's head and stroked it though it was wet. "Are you...serious?"

Die nodded, letting out a little whimper. "Yes... completely."

Kyo just sat there, feeling like a weight was on his chest. "Great...just...great..."

Almost dreading to say it, Die murmured out, "And they're putting us behind a barrier so no one will even accidentally touch us. Something about germs and ignorant people."

Kyo blinked a little. "A...a barrier? So...we're to be trotted out like cattle, then?" He was seething by this point, so ready to just call management and outright refuse to go on the tour.

"Yes, exactly," Die huffed out. "Cows... meat... fucking things, not people. And worse, they're not planning on being upfront with the fans about it either."

Kyo finally stood up again, adjusting the water temp as it was getting cold. He washed quickly then settled against the wall as bile rose in his throat. "This is fucking insane. Why would they do this?"

Die watched Kyo wash for something to do and then finally got up and went about washing himself as well. Once he was done, he turned off the water and cupped Kyo's cheek as he passed him, getting out of the shower. "I don't even know. But I got told off twice for my opinions and basically told to keep my nose out of shit that wasn't my business." He grabbed a towel and handed it off to Kyo, then getting his own and wrapping it around his waist, heading right out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. "I'm a mess," he admitted softly, not sure if Kyo had followed him or not, but needing to get it off his chest. "I can feel the plunge... that black hole of despair... the depression eating at my mind and my actions. And I know exactly where it's coming from."

Kyo sighed and shook his head, taking the offered towel from Die. He dried quickly then followed the other into their bedroom, hearing Die's quiet admission. He moved behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist. "I don't know how to help, baby, but I'm here...always."

Die brought his hand up over Kyo's, holding onto him. "Not smoking right now is the hardest thing I've ever done. It's always been my automatic go-to with this kind of shit. And now I don't have it... and I'm out of fluid on the e-cig, have been for days now." He closed his eyes and huffed a bit. "I feel completely lost... mentally. And then... well... I fucked up downstairs, didn't I?"

Kyo frowned a little, making a mental note to get Die's e-cig re-filled. At the mention of their previous activities, he shook his head. "You just worried me, that's all..." He pressed his lips to Die's back, squeezing him tighter.

Die stood there for a few minutes, just accepting the hug and then he moved away, crawling onto the bed. He rolled over, revealing the tears glistening in his eyes. "Make love to me, Kyo? Just... all the lights off, just you and I...and slow. Achingly slow."

Kyo peered at his lover for a moment and nodded, moving to turn the light off, making the room mostly dark save for the glow from the hallway and the streetlamp that sat a little ways down the street. 

He stepped over to the bed, climbing onto it beside Die and coming up to kiss his lips softly before moving to kiss away the tears under each eye. After pausing at Die's lips for another moment, he travelled downward, placing feather light kisses along his neck while his hand slowly drew patterns over his chest and stomach.

Die just lay back, letting Kyo love on him, needing the affection more than he cared to actually admit. He pursed his lips a bit and slid his hand up into his lover's hair, holding onto him gently.

Kyo smiled against Die's skin, working his way to his chest then finding his heartbeat, lingering there, kissing the skin. After a long moment, he shifted to one of Die's nipples, lightly flicking his tongue over the bud and then giving the other the same treatment. He moved back up to kiss Die deeply while finally dipping his hand between his legs, brushing his palm over Die's length lightly.

Die let out a soft gasp and then whimpered at his nipple being paid attention to. He liked that and realized he seriously needed to find some kind of way to indicate that to Kyo more often. His hips shifted upwards a tiny bit, and he breathed out a soft sound.

Kyo nibbled on Die's bottom lip then lifted his head, gazing into his eyes as he wrapped his fingers around Die's length, stroking him slowly. "You are, by far, the most gorgeous human being I have ever had the pleasure to love."

Die arched into Kyo's touch, his head lolling back and a moan making itself evident after a few seconds. "I love you."

Kyo smiled and bent to nuzzle Die's neck, nipping the skin very lightly. "I love you, too, Koi." He shifted so that he was between Die's legs, once again making his way south with his mouth. He paused to pay better attention to Die's nipples, licking and sucking each one in turn while his hand continued to move over his lover's length.

Die tilted his head backwards, closing his eyes and pushing his hips forward with a tiny groan. "Yes," he pleased quietly, not really sure what he was asking for.

Kyo made a soft sound and finally moved back, spreading Die's legs and lifting one up to press his lips to his calf and then up to his knee, kissing there and then to his thigh, paying more attention to the skin here. He licked and nipped then drew it between his teeth, intent on marking it.

Die let out a soft laugh at the way Kyo was kissing his legs, biting his lip a little and then lightly tugging on his baby's hair. "Love you."

Kyo flashed a grin up at Die then nipped his skin again before moving to the other leg and doing the same, leaving an identical mark on the opposite thigh. "My gorgeous love."

Die bit his lip lightly and then shifted under him. "I need you in me, baby… please."

Kyo looked at Die, smiling softly. "Impatient..." He leaned over Die to get the lube from underneath the pillow, stealing a kiss as he did. Once he had lube in hand, he poured some onto his fingers, rubbing it around to warm it up before pushing both digits into Die's body carefully.

A small laugh left Die's lips and he shrugged slightly. "I just... I adore you," he let out quietly.

Kyo grinned up at his lover, pushing his fingers in and up to just the right spot, massaging Die's prostate for a few moments. Die's breath hitched as Kyo's fingers pushed against his prostate. It wasn't entirely flail-worthy like it sometimes had been in the past, but it was amazing, nonetheless.

Kyo continued watching Die's face as he paid attention to the bundle of nerves inside him. He slowly rubbed the area a bit more then begin sliding his fingers in and out in a gentle rhythm, wanting to stretch Die even though he was impatient himself.

Die's breathing slowly evened out, his arousal cresting in a gentle sort of fashion. He bit his lip slightly and then issued a soft sound of pleasure as the other started to move even more rhythmically within him.

Kyo kept it up for a bit longer before finally removing his fingers from Die's body. He poured more lube onto his length, stroking himself to spread it around, letting out a soft groan at his own touch. 

After quickly wiping off his hand, he grasped Die's thighs and pushed them apart, positioning himself then pushing into his lover's body with a low moan.

Die brought his leg up to wrap around the other's hip, arching into his movements, grinding back against him and letting out slightly breathless pants as Kyo slid into his body. "Kyo..."

Kyo rolled his hips, seating himself fully into Die's body, groaning as he bent over him, slowly rocking against him. "Die...Gods..."

Die huffed out a soft breath, greatly enjoying what the other was doing to him just then. "Feels... amazing," he whispered out.

Kyo slid his hand along Die's thigh and around to his hip, holding onto it as he pushed into his lover at a steady, slow pace. "Yes, you do..." he groaned out, a shiver going through him.

Die's fingers slipped up to the back of Kyo's neck, lightly massaging the muscles there while his lover moved over him. "A-ah," he breathed out against his ear, feeling nearly overwhelmed already by what was going on.

Kyo shifted and leaned into Die more, wanting to feel his lover's hands on him. He slipped one arm under Die's back, burying his face against his neck as he rocked his hips, picking up the speed a bit.

Die met Kyo, thrust for thrust, his hips just slowly arching toward his lover each time, his mouth and tongue laving over Kyo's earlobe and neck.

Kyo felt a shudder of pleasure course through his body as Die's tongue flicked over his earlobe. He let out a sigh of pleasure, bringing his other hand up to push into Die's hair. "Gods, I love you..."

"I love you more than anything," Die whispered out to him, both hands sliding down to grip Kyo's biceps as he arched up a bit harder, gasping as his abdominal muscles trembled.

Kyo groaned then lifted his head to lock lips with Die, kissing him almost desperately as he ramped up his speed, his control unraveling quickly.

Die lifted his other leg and curled it around Kyo's hip, arching hard into him. After a moment, he sighed softly and then arched almost impossibly as he started to cum with absolutely no warning at all.

Kyo closed his eyes, feeling the way Die's body clenched and quivered around him as his lover reached his peak. He gave a few hard thrusts then stilled, moaning lowly as he came as well, spilling his offering into Die with a barely audible whisper of his lover's name.

Die shivered slightly as he felt Kyo start to cum deep inside him. He arched up toward the other and huffed out a soft sigh before sliding back down onto the bed.

Kyo shifted only slightly to lie down atop Die, his head resting on his lover's chest as he fought to catch his breath again. "I love you, Daisuke."

Die curled his arms around his lover and closed his eyes, biting at his lip. "I love you, too, sweetheart... with everything I am."

Kyo kissed Die's skin where he could reach it, closing his eyes and clinging to his lover.

Die slowly settled back, his breathing evening out as he closed his eyes. "Thank you, love."

Kyo smiled and lifted his head, kissing Die softly on the lips. "You're welcome, baby."


	50. Chapter 50

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

As rare as it was, everyone had a week off following the last bits of the Japanese tour before they were scheduled to head off to Europe. Die had chosen to use his time catching up on all the things he neglected the rest of the year. He'd spent an entire day pampering himself, complete with getting his hair cut and dyed, and a manicure and pedicure as well as an honest to god massage at a place trusted with celebrities. After all of that, he'd felt a lot more refreshed and relaxed, coming home with some food Boss had insisted he drop by and pick up, along with a new shirt as a gift from the other man.

Once he'd come home, he'd set about eating the meal, perched in front of the big screen TV in the living room while he watched a replay of D'erlanger's 2011 live from his DVD that he'd purchased a while back and never got to complete.

While Die had spent the day pampering himself, Kyo had gone off to a few different places with his camera. He'd gotten several lovely shots in and was in a very good mood upon his return home.

D'erlanger's music greeted his ears when he walked in the back door, pulling a smile from him. He darted upstairs to put away his equipment then headed back down and into their living room, spotting the top of Die's newly dyed and cut hair. "You look gorgeous," he commented, moving to sit next to Die on the couch, feet tucked under himself.

Die glanced up when Kyo came in, a smile on his lips. "Thank you, love." He leaned over toward him a little. "Boss sent food. If you're hungry, it's in the kitchen. Just warm it for like two minutes." His eyes moved back to the screen even as he made a kissy face at Kyo, indicating he wanted at least a peck on the lips, though his focus was clearly on the lovely rendition of Lullaby D'erlanger was providing at the moment.

Kyo glanced towards the kitchen then shrugged slightly. "Maybe later..." He chuckled softly at Die's kissy face, leaning in pressing his lips to Die's briefly before settling back. "I can see Cipher's got all of your attention right now..."

A slight flush appeared on Die's cheeks at the statement, and he sniffed a bit. "Not all. You always have at least some part of my attention... the advantages of being my lover." He watched avidly even as the song changed, watching Kyo move about the stage and then Cipher shift in his signature ways, a small grin coming up on Die's face as he half mimicked the strumming with the hand holding a barbeque rib.

Kyo snorted lightly and shook his head, his lips still curved into a smile. The next song started in, and he soon found himself quietly humming along, his eyes watching the guitarist and singer. "It's fascinating watching them with the knowledge that they're together..."

Die nodded a little. "I'm sure they feel the same way, honestly. You know... Cipher had me send them a copy of The Unraveling... he had the regular one, but the limited was all out when he realized it had been released already." He snickered. "I guess I sort of... felt... proud? That he'd even want it." He quieted down, watching the two men pull the crowd's attention in tandem, a grin curving his lips. "They don't even realize they're doing it."

Kyo's eyes flicked to the screen then to Die's face. "Seriously? I had no clue...that's kind of amazing." He pushed his hair from his face, unable to help the smile that plastered itself there. He returned to the video and hummed softly. "Nope, but they're in sync even there..."

Die shifted, finally putting down the ribs, finished for now, licking his fingers off one by one, his eyes completely glued to the screen as Kyo pranced over toward Cipher. He bit his lip a little, his cheeks flaring up with the slight pink of arousal as he reached for his soda. "Sweet sin," he hissed out at the way Kyo converged on Cipher, not even actually to him yet. "This feels like voyeurism," he announced a moment later. "Actually knowing them and then... this... and... gah."

Kyo's eyes darted from the screen to his lover's face, a smirk crossing his lips. "You think so?" he murmured, his hand slipping over to rest on Die's thigh. "Or are you just so attracted to Cipher that you can't help but think that way?"

Die caught himself sucking on his fingertip for a bit too long, removing it from his mouth. He flushed even brighter as Kyo damn near went in for touching himself, so very close to being dirty, but only teasing. He shoved his face into his palm and groaned as a second later, the screen panned to Cipher, only showing him from the elbows upward, making it look like he was jerking off rather than playing the guitar. "Holy fuck, I'm hopeless."

Kyo's eyes were glued on Die's face rather than the action on the screen. His lover's reactions as well as his own appreciation for the men on the screen were having an effect on him, and when Die proclaimed himself hopeless, Kyo snorted. He slid his hand up Die's thigh, shaking his head. "I think we both are..."

Die peered out from between his fingers when Kyo said they both were. He sighed a bit and then laughed, putting his hands down. "Well... I... um..." he sniffed a bit. "Yeah. Just. We'll go with yeah. Yeah is an answer to everything, right?"

Kyo chuckled then leaned in to press his lips to Die's neck, nipping the skin lightly before pulling back and peering at his lover. He was quiet for several moments; his lip pulled between his teeth as he considered bringing something up that he'd been working on for a while now.

Die let out a little groan at the nip, raising his hand, almost putting it in Kyo's hair before becoming aware he was still sort of sticky. He put his hand back down and made a face, reaching for the alcohol wipe on the table to wash his fingers with. "You know, I think they only get better and better with time. I've adored them forever, but I thought 2008 was amazing, then this DVD... and god, being on stage with them. I think they're aging like wine. Motherfuckers."

Kyo grinned at Die's fanboying over the band then finally reached out and grabbed the remote, hitting the pause button. "Die, I have something to ask you..."

Die attempted to sober up quickly, licking his lips a bit and then tossing the wipe on the table after a moment. "What's up?"

Kyo shifted back slightly and fidgeted with the hem of his shirt, trying to think of a way to say what he wanted. He huffed out a breath then looked up at Die's face. "What would you say if we invited Kyo and Cipher over...for more than just friendly company?" he asked, squirming in his seat a little.

Die followed along with him all the way to inviting them over. And then he gaped, at Kyo, having to forcibly shut his mouth and then swallow. After a moment, he flushed and murmured, "You think they'd do it?"

Kyo hesitated for a few moments then took another breath. "They've already agreed..."

Die almost choked on his inward breath, certainly glad he wasn't holding anything right then, because his entire body sort of failed to do a damn thing for a half second before becoming operational again. After a few more deep breaths, he closed his eyes, and murmured, "Okay, I think I've had a…uh... failure... somewhere in the... brain region. Because you cannot have just said what I think you did. I've got to be taking this wrong." Mostly because there was no way in hell that Cipher and Kyo would want to fuck him... them... well... anything that he'd just heard. "Let's try this again, with less brain failure on my part. What?" He opened his eyes and stared at Kyo, his eyebrow raised.

Kyo clasped his hands together. "At our engagement party, after we'd discovered they were a couple and after Kyo had had a few drinks, we got to talking. Well, it turns out that he and Cipher are into that sort of lifestyle. I ended up telling him that I was admittedly attracted to the idea of watching you with Cipher, and that, well, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought of him in the same manner." Kyo paused, reaching to take a drink of water then continued on. "So, it eventually came up that Kyo would talk to Cipher about it, and well, here we are. It's my turn to talk to you..."

Die could feel the tingle of arousal start low inside him. He swallowed thickly and shifted on the seat, not quite sure how he was supposed to be reacting to this news, though inside it was pretty clear the party was already starting without the rest of him. When they got to the last part, Die couldn't really do much else except sit back on the seat and just mouth the word, "Wow," several times, never actually speaking it thought.

Reaching up, he rubbed his nose a bit and then, quietly, "So they're like officially... swingers?" He'd heard the term somewhere before and honestly, it had intrigued him enough to make him want to look far enough to understand what it was. The idea of swapping partners and ending up with Cipher for the night and Kyo ending up with Kyo... well, he'd be lying if he said his dick wasn't already hard thinking about it.

Kyo watched Die's face carefully for his reaction then nearly breathed out a sigh of relief when his lover didn't seem to object. His tongue slid over his bottom lip before he nodded in answer to Die's question. "It would seem so, yes...I didn't ask for many details but we wouldn't be their first..."

Die thought about it carefully for a few moments, wondering how it would affect his thoughts on Cipher, his virtual idolization of the man. But then... he'd gotten closer with him over the past year and more often than not, if he was going to share some random thing, Cipher was on his list to send it to. So it wasn't that far of a stretch.

He reached for Kyo's hands and ran his fingers over them before clasping them in his own. "Are we sure they both want it?" The last thing he wanted was awkwardness between any of the four members.

Kyo squeezed Die's hands, looking at his lover then holding up his finger. He leaned forward and picked up Die's laptop, opening it up and quickly getting into his mail client. He searched for and found the string of emails between him, Kyo and Cipher then showed the screen to Die in which they both flat-out admitted to finding the idea quite intriguing and arousing.

Die watched Kyo use his laptop and then when he handed it over, he started looking through it, scrolling down through the string of emails. He blinked a bit at the way that Kyo seemed so very eager about it, Cipher not far behind in his descriptions. He let out a soft sound at the final mention from Cipher on wondering how Die would react if he knew he wanted in his pants. Putting the laptop down, he sat back and just looked purely shocked. "They... he... wow." After a moment, he realized he hadn't really answered the question and he looked right at Kyo. "If you're as okay with it as you sound in these emails, then my answer is hell yes."

Kyo watched Die read the emails, again nervous about his lover's reaction to it all. When Die finally looked at him and gave his enthusiastic consent, a smile finally graced his lips and he nodded. "Yes, I am okay with it as long as we have understanding and discussion about what will take place beforehand."

Die shifted, looking a bit uncomfortable, but all the same, he nodded. "I only have one worry in all of this, love... just one." He sighed and leaned forward. "You know how much Cipher means to me... in a completely different way than you. I don't love him in any sense of the word... but I adore him, and I'm not... shy about that fact." He held up his tattooed hand as proof of this. "The very last thing I want to do is somehow rip us apart because I'm... too enthusiastic or something."

Kyo sighed at Die's statement and nodded. "I've considered and made peace with that fact. I don't promise to not feel a bit of jealous, but I want this to be...mind blowing for the both of us."

Die nodded a little bit, shifting to grab Kyo's hand again. "So... as long as we're good on that end, then... I'm fine." He pursed his lips a bit. "When...?"

Kyo laced his fingers with Die's, squeezing tightly. "Incidentally, they're free this weekend...if you want..."

Die bit his lip a little and then nodded. "Call them where I can hear?"

Kyo shifted and pulled his phone from his pocket. He flipped to his address book and selected Cipher's number, hitting "dial" then pressing the button to switch it to speaker phone. As it rang, he shifted to lean closer to Die, his fingers flexing slightly.

Die leaned over toward Kyo, taking his free hand and pushing it against his crotch, showing him he was hard. He leaned in and whispered in his ear, "Suck me off in a bit?"

Kyo pressed his palm against Die and groaned, barely cutting it off when he heard the phone pick up and Cipher's voice come over the line with a questioning hello. "Cipher, hey, it's Kyo... and Die. You're on speaker."

Die's head fell back against the headrest of the couch, his hips pushing up into Kyo's hand, his arousal throbbing at just the idea of what they were about to set up. He managed a somewhat breathless, "Hi," as well.

Cipher chuckled a bit at Die's hello and then, after a bit of crackling across the line and a slight clatter, he announced, "You're on speaker as well. Kyo's here. What's up?"

The elder Kyo could be heard moving about in the background before his voice came over the line as well. "Hey guys," he greeted.

Kyo licked his lips then looked at Die before pushing forward with the issue at hand. "Well, Die and I have been talking about...well, about getting together with the two of you...and he's agreed."

Die wasn't entirely sure how to progress the conversation, biting at his lip a little and just waiting on the others to say something... anything... that would affirm it still being okay.

Cipher made a little noise, audible across the line, and then offered a quiet, "So you are interested in what your idol's cock looks like then," followed by a devious sounding chuckle.

Kyo turned to Cipher and hit his arm, snorting. "You're so subtle, Ichiro..." he quipped, pulling away from the phone and laughing.

The younger vocalist let out a sound between a snort and a laugh then shook his head. "He is very interested, Cipher." He looked to Die then bit his lip. "He's hard just thinking about it, to be honest."

Die let out a gasp at Kyo mentioning his hard-on. "Kyo," he hissed out, blushing something awful, firmly planting his palm over his face. "Oh my god."

Cipher chuckled, pinching Kyo's ass. "Mmm... yes, well, Hiroshi," he returned, pushing the other's real name in return to the use of his own, "you heard the man... apparently he's interested," the sound of a sloppy kiss, "in my," a smack as Cipher swatted his ass, "cock." He firmly grabbed his lover around the waist and pulled him against himself. "Plus... you know, some hot Kyo on Kyo action to watch, right Die?" 

The redheaded guitarist let out something of a squeak, nodding a bit and somehow, feeling completely off his usual game.

Kyo shot Die a half-apologetic look then listened to the exchange on the phone, something about it shooting straight to his dick. He bit his lip hard to contain the moan that threatened to slip out.

The older vocalist chuckled lowly over the phone then grunted as his ass was smacked. He leaned into Cipher, turning his head back to tongue his lover's jawline, grinding against him. "Kyo on Kyo action would be very interesting to me, I know that...,” he responded, his voice laced with arousal.

Die shuddered at the look on Kyo's face, the way his body responded to the words, the actions. The fire burned brighter inside of him, and he pushed himself off the couch, sinking to the floor at Kyo's feet, pushing his legs apart, and nuzzling in against his thigh, his hand roving the other's lap.

Cipher let out a moan worthy of any porn video Die had seen in the past few months and then a laugh. "I think we're all... in agreement here, judging by the sounds."

Kyo watched as Die slid to the floor, his hand instantly going to Die's hair, tugging just a little. He cleared his throat then nodded at Cipher's response before remembering he was on the phone. "Yes, indeed...How about Saturday night then?" He tugged Die's head just a bit closer to his crotch, groaning.

Kyo let out a rough laugh as he listened to the younger men become excited over the phone. He turned fully in Cipher's lap and noisily sucked at his neck for a few moments before releasing him with a loud smack. "Yes, all in agreement for sure..."

The tug on his hair was all Die needed. He quickly opened Kyo's pants, freeing his length to his gaze, loving the fact that Kyo was as hard as he was right then. With a soft hiss of, "Yes," he worked up enough spit and then leaned over his lover, letting the spit dribble from between his lips down over Kyo's cock before taking him in his mouth and starting to suck him off, completely unabashed that they were still on the phone and he wasn't exactly being quiet with his blowjob.

Cipher groaned a bit when Kyo started in on his neck. "Hiro... ah..." he cleared his throat, "Saturday sounds wonderful. And... uh..." he paused for a moment, listening, "Die?" At the distinct lack of response, he let out a dark chuckle, "Fuck... you're sucking him off, aren't you?"

Kyo could not contain the sound of shocked pleasure that escaped him when Die's mouth descended on his length. He stuffed his knuckles in his mouth to stifle it somewhat but Cipher's comment let him know his efforts were futile. "Oh...yes..." he groaned out by way of reaction and response. 

The elder vocalist cackled softly then slipped his hand down to squeeze Cipher's bulge. "Mm...Ichi...you're just as hard as he probably is." He smirked then nodded towards the phone. "Saturday's perfect for us...we'll be there around 6."

"Of course I am," Cipher returned. "Hey, Die... you hear that? You succeeded in getting me riled up over the phone. Congrats on that." He snuck his hand around to grope his lover, not relenting at all. "Tell them goodnight, love... go on...."

Die's way of response was simply to keep sucking Kyo off, perhaps growing a bit more frantic with his actions, desperation setting in on his own arousal.

Kyo groaned loudly when Cipher groped him, his hips bucking. "Ahh...hnn...yes, uh...Goodnight, gentlemen. We shall see you Saturday." He let out another groan at being groped then hung up the phone, promptly lunging for his lover afterwards.

The younger Kyo could only moan in response, hanging up the phone once they had gone and focusing on bucking his hips up into Die's mouth, his cock aching for release. "Fuck...Die..."

Die popped up off his dick long enough to hiss out, "Cum down my fuckin' throat... I'm gonna fill your mouth with mine so goddamned fast." He groaned, sliding down on his dick again, bobbing his head desperately.

Kyo growled and got a fistful of Die's hair, yanking hard as he snapped his hips up. He fucked Die's throat for a few moments before he lost it with a cry, spurting cum down his lover's throat. "Die, fuck!"

Die swallowed everything he was given, groaning just after and pulling up off his cock. "I just... god... suck me, baby, I need you." He sat back against the table, opening his pants and revealing his achingly hard length to the other's gaze. "Please."

Kyo took half a minute to catch his breath before sinking to his knees in front of Die. He reached out to grasp his lover's length, holding him steady as he took him into his mouth, immediately bobbing his head.

Die let out a whine the instant Kyo's mouth descended on him. His hips arched, and he gasped, pushing his hand down into Kyo's hair. "Ah fuck!"

Kyo diligently bobbed his head, his hands moving to rest on Die's thighs, nails scratching into his skin. "Mmngh!"

Die's hips began to buck ever so slightly, not wanting to actually choke Kyo given the other's voice, but he definitely knew he could get by with asking for a blowjob given the week off. "God, baby...use your teeth just a little."

Kyo flicked his eyes up to Die's face the nodded, pulling his lips back and letting his teeth graze his lover's cock ever so slightly as he worked.

Die moaned, as the other followed his instructions. It didn't take him but a few more seconds before he was cumming, his hand fisting in Kyo's hair to hold him there, one of the few times he didn't give him a choice in the matter, wanting to fill the other's mouth with his cum.

Kyo relished that hand in his hair, pushing his head down and completely burying his nose against Die's pubic hair as his lover spilled his offering right down his throat. After a moment, he pulled back, a trial of cum and saliva sticking from his lip.

Die watched as Kyo took it all so willingly. When he pulled back, Die let him go, lightly stroking over his hair. "I love you, darling," he murmured softly.

Kyo swallowed then lifted himself up, kissing Die hard on the lips. "I love you, too, Koi." he returned, brushing a stray strand of hair from his face.


	51. Chapter 51

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

The day slowly approached that the two couples were to meet up for an evening of...well, there was no other way to put it, than passion. And Die grew more and more nervous inwardly about the whole thing. Part of him was waiting with bated breath, but the other part was almost scared he... or someone... would create jealousy or anger in another person involved. It was a rather fragile thing that they were treading into. Lover versus idol versus friend versus teacher. He honestly couldn't think of a stickier situation than what they were heading toward... but what was reward without trial?

In preparation, Die found himself laying the romance on Kyo stronger than ever, showering him with praise and love, affection and passion. For the entirety of the time between, he did his level best to make it entirely clear that he was utterly in love with the other man.

The evening of their meetup, Die prepared the spare bedroom, not wanting to invite guests into their own bedroom, the symbolism of such a sacred place not lost on him in the least. To invite them into the guest room created the idea that they were guests, not permanent residents of the relationship. An endeavor not a fixture. He laid out condoms, lubricant, and various toys that seemed tame enough. In the bathroom, he laid out four towels rather than the usual two, and then he set the touch lamps in the bedroom to low and shut the cats out.

Downstairs, he laid out a bottle of chilled wine, four glasses, and some sushi: some without meat and some with. And then he called to his lover, nearly an hour before the others were due. "Kyo?"

In the time since he, Die, Cipher and Kyo had decided on a day and time for their "get together", Kyo had found himself showered in much love and attention from Die. He didn't mind it in the least though, because he knew why Die was doing it. This was going to be a tricky thing to juggle but he was confident they could handle it. 

That evening, Kyo spent some time grooming himself, trimming various hairs and ensuring he was as clean as possible. He was just putting his shirt on when he heard Die call for him. "Coming," he responded, making his way quickly downstairs. "Oh wow, nice spread..."

Die smiled a bit at Kyo's comment and curled up on the couch, gesturing for Kyo to come sit next to him. "Thanks." His tongue slipped out and slid across his lower lip. "I wanted to talk before they arrive. I feel like we should discuss some dos and don'ts with... just the pair of us around. It'll be easier to admit things, I think."

Kyo moved to settled next to Die on the couch, peering at him then nodding. "Okay, I think you're right about that." He reached over to rest his hand on Die's knee, squeezing lightly. "What's on your mind?"

"First... I have sort of researched how swinging usually works... and generally it's either done in individual rooms where things will not be revealed... or it's done where all four people can see each other, and it sort of rotates among each pair. I know I can't expect an answer on what we're doing right now, but... if I were given a choice... I'd prefer to be in the same room. I think it'd leave less open to the mind, to wondering what was happening and potentially being jealous of it."

Kyo listened to Die, nodding a bit. "I agree, I would really prefer to be in the same room, and I think, given that we're not typically in this lifestyle, they will be okay with that."

Die nodded. "Yeah... so... is there anything you want completely off the list of allowed acts? I... have one request myself... I'd like for my... kink," he gave him a significant look so he could figure out what one he meant in particular, "to remain between us. Not because I'm embarrassed, but because I want that to be ours. Only ours. One thing completely off limits."

Kyo pushed his hand through his hair, pursing his lips. "I understand. I don't think there's anything in particular that I want off the table except I certainly don't think we should bring in anything like choking or cutting."

A small smile spread across Die's face. "Your own thing to keep between us then as well." For nearly the first time in all the time they'd been together, Die made a display of his strength, reaching over and pulling Kyo into his lap without offering him any say in the deal at all. He nuzzled into Kyo's neck and let out a huff before offering, "I'm excited... are you?"

Kyo nodded then let out a soft sound of surprise. He wasn't used to Die manhandling him but secretly, he did like a show of strength here and there. He reached up to lightly stroke his hand over Die's hair. "Yes...and nervous as fuck."

"Yeah... well... that's a given." Die nipped lightly at Kyo's neck. "Tell me... what do you want the most? What is it that you've secretly been wanting since it was mentioned?"

Kyo tilted his head to the side slightly. "Mm, honestly? Watching you and Cipher. I want to watch you suck his dick."

Die pressed his lips to Kyo's ear and chuckled softly. "Yeah... well... that's what I wanted to do the most, so... aren't we in luck?"

Kyo grinned, sliding his hand down Die's chest. "I would say so. I do have one other thing I'd like to have happen." He paused for a moment, licking his lips before carrying on. "I would love to feel my cock alongside Cipher's inside you, possibly with Kyo buried in me." He looked at Die. "I understand fully if you don't think you can handle that, though..."

Die's breath caught and he shivered slightly. "I've never... tried it... but I think I'd like to."

Kyo swallowed and nodded, reaching up to push Die's hair from his face. "It's something that has crossed my mind before, and now would be the best way to achieve it."

Die huffed out a little laugh, "My dick is getting hard," he whispered out.

Kyo chuckled lowly, shifting on Die's lap a bit. "I can feel that." He squirmed a bit more, leaning in to lick and nip at Die's neck. "This should prove to be one hell of an experience, baby."

"You know... the only issue is, I'm not sure I have any clue how on earth to start any of this," he murmured softly.

Kyo gave Die a nearly pained looked, shaking his head. "I'm not either. I was honestly thinking that maybe we should let them lead? They are our seniors in more ways than one, after all."

Die's head bobbed a bit. "Yeah, I just... I predict awkward at first on my part at the very least. I want to be smooth as fuck... I want to show off how I can be when given the chance. But I'm afraid it's just going to all end up derp in the end."

Kyo chuckled and shifted on his lover's lap. "I know. I'm afraid I will be too quiet and won't get my wants out there."

"I think part of it is actually discussion... like at first. From my understanding of how this works." A moment later, the doorbell rang and Die nearly jumped, jerking violently and gasping. "Holy fuck!"

"Yeah, I think you're right." The doorbell rang and he found himself nearly being dumped to the floor. "Shit...uhm...shall we answer together then?"

Die gripped the edge of the couch and looked rather like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming semi. His mouth flapped but words didn't come out.

Kyo stared at Die then glanced at the wine on the table, deciding that they would both need some of that before the night was over. "Okay then." He stood up and moved to the front door, wiping his hands on his pants a couple of times before actually opening it. "Good evening."

Die barely managed to get his mouth to close, finally shutting it and closing his eyes, concentrating on breathing normally for a few moments before he attempted to stand up, making his way up behind Kyo, his actions half-way between chaotic and stiff as a mother fucking board.

Cipher was the one currently at the door, a bottle of high-end tequila in his hand and a single stalk of Delphinium, the blue flowers delicate and yet sensual. He held the tequila out to Kyo and the flower out to Die. "Good evening to you as well, Kyo." He reached out and gently cupped Kyo's cheek before stepping to the side and kneeling down to start taking his shoes off.

Kyo took the bottle of tequila with a slight bow before blinking a little at the physical contact, finding that he was not in the least bit objecting to it. "Please make yourself at home. Where is Kyo?"

Cipher chuckled. "Struggling to get himself and his big ass gift out of the car I imagine. Little fucker doesn't like help on things like that. Leave him be, he'll be in shortly."

Die looked sort of flabbergast at the flower, a pathetic little whimper leaving his mouth a moment after as he stood there utterly uselessly.

"Die... loosen up. I'm not some big badass you know... I'm me." Cipher shifted away from his shoes and moved to stand behind him, placing his hands on Die's shoulders, lightly rubbing the tense muscles. "Something maybe you don't see, Die... but you're just as talented as I am... you're just as much an inspiration for me as I am to you. Don't put me on this pedestal."

Kyo had stepped away to put the tequila on the table next to the wine and sushi. When he returned, he caught most of Cipher's pep talk to Die. He was about to head back to the couch when he spotted Cipher's Kyo coming up to the door with a large box in his hands. "Kyo, whatever it is, you shouldn't have."

The older Kyo was balancing a large box in one hand a single sprig of Tuberose in the other. He shot Die and Kyo a wide grin as he handed the flowers to the vocalist. He handed the box to Die with a wink then went about getting his shoes off. "How's it going?"

The younger vocalist took the flower and bowed his head slightly. "Thank you," he murmured softly, cheeks flushing the slightest bit. He wasn't exactly used to getting flowers from people like Kyo from D'erlanger.

Die smirked a bit at what was given to Kyo. He carted the box off into the living room, Cipher trailing after him, and set it down off to the side of the couch, settling on the smallest amount of couch possible.

Cipher settled down on the couch, pressed right up against Die's thigh, completely intentionally. He smirked a bit as he carefully reached for the wine bottle, opening it and intentionally pouring it for Die, handing him a glass before putting the bottle back down. 

Instantly, Die reached out, returning the favor, and handing the new glass to Cipher, his hand shaking ever so slightly.

Cipher smiled brilliantly at him, reaching to tilt Die's chin up, leaning in close, his breath ghosting over Die's lips. "We are equals, Die. Keep that in mind tonight."

Kyo and Kyo followed them along to the living room, the younger vocalist settling on the other end of the couch while the elder sat between him and Cipher. Feeling the need to be polite, Kyo reached out and grabbed the box the other had brought, opening it up. Its content perplexed him, however, as it turned out to simply be a smaller box. He glanced at the elder then opened that box as well, letting out a low laugh when it revealed a tray of strawberries and whipped cream. "That's...rather amusing. Thank you."  
The elder vocalist grinned then slipped his hand over the other's leg, winking. "I find strawberries and cream lighten the mood quite a bit..."

Die sat there, Cipher's lips an inch from his own, his blood pounding through his veins. He wanted nothing more than to kiss the other stupid right that moment, but he also couldn't bring himself to do it, uncertain and completely unwilling to be the first to jump into it, afraid it would create tension he didn't mean for it to. 

When Die didn't kiss him, Cipher chuckled and shifted back, moving to pour wine for the two vocalists that seemed to be slightly off in their own world. He passed them out and then raised his glass, Die instantly moving to clink glasses with him. "Cheers."

Both guitarists made to hold their glasses out to the vocalists, so much in sync it was almost funny.

Kyo wasn't thinking properly as he tried to take in the fact that Cipher was very nearly kissing Die already. The scene sparked heat deep within his belly, and he almost felt relieved to feel the lust building within him. Before he could fully pull himself from his thoughts, he was handed a glass by Cipher, and he took it without hesitation. He watched as the two guitarists moved in sync to raise their glasses and almost laughed, knowing then that at least they would have no issues. He raised his own glass, tapping it lightly against each of theirs then turned to do the same with the elder Kyo.

The older vocalist was just grinning as he ran his eyes over his lover and Die. He took his glass and gleefully clinked it against the other three. "Kanpai." He took a sip then leaned back, letting his arm slide around Kyo's waist. 

Kyo took a healthy drink of his own wine and shifted, tensing up slightly as the other Kyo's arm slipped around him. Somehow, it made him feel like a damn teenager.

Die clinked glasses with Kyo and with Hiroshi, taking a drink from his glass and then settling back, a smirk on his lips as he took in the strawberries. He gestured a bit at the sushi. "I ordered some sushi for us... break food or appetizer... before dessert." He chuckled and then crossed one leg over the other, seeming slightly more at home in his own skin as he continued to sip at the wine he was holding, his eyes bright. "So... I think it's prudent to admit that we've not done this sort of thing before... well, at least not in this context. We've had a third party, but usually mostly watching more than anything else." He glanced at Kyo, hoping he wasn't being too forward.

Cipher reached and picked up one piece of the non-fish sushi, popping it into his mouth, chewing, and swallowing. Settling back, leaning slightly on Die, he hitched up his shoulders a bit and then let them fall. "We figured as much given that Kyo needed to talk to you about it first." He glanced toward Hiroshi and smirked. "As I'm sure my darling told you already, we generally tend to swap partners when we do this sort of thing." He slid his hand onto Die's thigh, causing the redhead to instantly tense up, his eyes wide. "Given the things expressed, we sort of set things toward... let's say... some guitarist-guitarist and vocalist-vocalist love." His hand slid slightly higher on Die's thigh, lightly running over it, but not going anywhere particularly dirty. "Normally things would be done in either separate rooms or completely separate households and include a sort of date at the beginning. Truly swapping partners for the evening. But we took into account the fact that we are fairly certain you are not, in fact, swingers. Is this a valid assumption?"

Kyo took a breath, an attempt to steady himself as he listened to Die speak. His lover glanced toward him and he simply nodded his head, implying that he was fine with how this conversation was going. Another sip of wine went past his lips and he finally settled the glass on the table, not wanting to imbibe too much of the stuff. Cipher spoke up and he felt relief flooding him as it seemed the guitarist understood perfectly where they were at in this situation. "Yes, that's true...we've not dabbled much into this sort of thing."

Hiroshi smiled at the two guitarists, his hand sliding up to play on the back of Kyo's neck, toying with the short hairs there. "That's perfectly fine with me. As Ichiro said, we generally split it up entirely, but I certainly don't mind being in the same room. I think it will provide an interesting dynamic all together."

Cipher's hand finally stopped wandering, just resting on Die's knee, squeezing lightly. "Some things need to be said, and I don't think that either of you," he glanced between Die and Kyo, "will be comfortable enough to say what needs to be said. So I'll take the dirty job." He cleared his throat and then stood up, shifting to crouch between the two younger men. He looked between them. "It needs to be crystal clear that absolutely nothing that happens here tonight is a threat to anyone's relationship. Pleasure for the sake of pleasure, sex for the sake of sex. In all of mine and Hiroshi's time doing this, I have found that it's actually only driven us closer together, created a stronger bond in our relationship in the end. The knowledge that we can trust one another with another sexual partner and realize that at the end of the night, we still come home to one another."

Die shifted slightly, taking a deep breath and looking toward Kyo, smiling softly at him before biting his lower lip.

"I wish to be clear on one other thing. We will not be staying the night. The night of such things is for partner-based intimacy. I need a promise from both of you that you will not just roll over and fall asleep once it's all said and done. You need tenderness, affection, loving care that is directed one hundred percent at only your life-partner. Do not talk about us once we are gone for the rest of the evening. We do not exist once we walk out the door until the following morning. As the same, once we are out your door, you will not exist to us until morning. That is the way the bond grows stronger. Understood?"

Kyo could have kissed Cipher for the next topic he brought up. He had been dancing around it with Die since they started discussing this. He braved settling his hand on Hiroshi's knee as the guitarist laid it all out. To be honest, he hadn't considered the afterward intimacy between him and Die, though he'd imagined they would spend time discussing it after the other two had left. 

Hiroshi glanced at Kyo, smirking at the younger's hand on his knee. He moved his own to rest atop it then looked from Die to Cipher and back, nodding his head. "It is essential that you understand this and abide by it. Ichiro's right, it will push you closer."

Cipher just smiled calmly at the three men before him. "Next dirty topic of the hour... giddiness, nervousness," he glanced at Die and then at Kyo, knowing well that Ichiro was fine, "shock, whatever it may be... it's going to happen. Me and mine are just... more used to hiding such reactions at this point. It's still there, underlying everything. Like getting on stage. You still feel nerves, but it's under this layer of knowing how it'll likely go down." He shrugged a bit. "Don't think for a minute both of us aren't sitting here wondering what it'll be like, what you both look like without all the pesky clothing in the way... how you will choose to fuck, what things we'll find out, and what secrets will be kept. It's natural. Trying to tamp out those things would make the whole endeavor pointless. Variety... isn't that the point of it all?" He reached to tilt Die's chin up, making him look him in the eye for a moment before doing the same to Kyo. "Now... the last thing on the laundry list. Off-limits things. I think we all probably have one. And we may or may not want to speak about what it specifically is... but if you think it might even remotely come up, then you need to specify it is not allowed. My big one is that no one is ever, ever allowed to rim me except Hiroshi."

Die shifted a bit, looking uncomfortable now that the topic had gone to his biggest fear. How was he supposed to admit that the thing he wanted to hide was the thing that was off-limits? After a few moments deliberation, he managed to half choke out, "Mine's a kink... and I do not believe it will come up... it's... rare." Rare was being nice. Wild, insane, fucked up... those were better adjectives, but he didn't dare use them or it'd point them in the right direction.

Hiroshi chuckled at the mention of giddiness and nervousness. He was feeling a bit of both though mainly he was riding a high of lust at the moment. The idea of watching Ichiro with Die was very appealing to him as well as the one of having his way with the younger vocalist by his side. He shifted and squeezed Kyo's knee before leaning back some, "On the subject of off-limit things, and I highly doubt we'll get to this this evening but I don't allow anyone but Ichiro to dominate me...but again, I don't think that will be an issue. "

Kyo squirmed a little and glanced at Die, thinking his lover had handled the kink thing very well. He shrugged his shoulders a bit and let out a little laugh, more out of nervousness than humor. "I can only think of one thing and that's that I prefer not to be choked or have any marks made above my collarbone."

Die didn't miss that Kyo left off even mentioning one of his things he'd said he wanted off-limits before, perhaps because he didn't think it'd happen. He opened his mouth and then shut it, uncertain what he was going to say in the first place. After a moment, he just let out a nervous chuckle.

Cipher arched one eyebrow at Die and then pushed himself up, settling back between them on the couch. "Die... boy... drain that thing, and get another one. You're going to shit yourself with nerves if you don't." He chuckled, shaking his head. "I know you have it in you to be suave as fuck, I watched you do it with Kyo, but I think you've got some pedestal problems right now."

Die looked honestly rather put in his place, his cheeks faintly flushed and his hand shaking slightly as he all but chugged the rest of his glass of wine and made for more.

"Not that I think alcohol solves all problems, but... in this case, I'm not sure you've been more nervous since your first time on stage."

"You'd be wrong... there's been things since then," Die glanced at Kyo and then flushed even darker. "But... yeah... in this case... second glass is allowed... encouraged... fuck, needed."

Kyo looked at Die then the still half-full glass of wine that was his own. He shifted and leaned forward, grabbing it and taking a good, long sip from it. He knew that he wasn't contributing to conversation much, and that was entirely due to the fact that he was nervous as fuck and every brush of Hiroshi's hand on his leg had the muscles beneath twitching like mad. He huffed out a quiet breath and pushed a hand through his hair before taking another sip of the wine.

Hiroshi laughed lightly, watching the exchange between the two guitarists. "Don't fret, Die. I think once you've found your footing here, you will be just fine. The same for Mr. Quiet over here." He smiled and turned to look at Kyo, squeezing his leg. "You both need to relax and focus on the fact that this will be a very pleasurable experience all around."

"Speaking of pleasure," Cipher spoke up, "I would like to direct the conversation to pleasant territory. What things do you most definitely want to happen tonight? Say... top three for each of us. And the quiet ones have to go first... which puts me last." He chuckled. "Kyo?"

Kyo found his own cheeks turning a bit pink as Hiroshi called him out for being quiet. He ducked his head slightly then looked back up, eyebrow raised at the new topic. He cleared his throat, fingers flexing over Hiroshi's hand before he spoke. "Honestly, Die and I just talked about this but...at some point, I would like for you and I, Ichiro, to double penetrate Die while Hiroshi is fucking me." He scratched at his nose. "I know that's a bit ambitious, but there you have it. Other than that, I wouldn't mind watching the two of you and vice versa."

Hiroshi's eyebrows lifted in slight surprise at Kyo's desires. He hadn't considered that sort of thing, though now that he thought about it, it provided for a very interesting scene. "I think, personally, that scenario could work out well. What do you think, Ichiro?"

Cipher's mouth curved upwards into a rather large smirk. "I think... as long as Die agrees, that it would be a challenge I'd like to endeavor upon." He turned to the younger guitarist and flicked under his chin, finally leaning in and catching his lips in a slow, gentle kiss.

Die sat for all of a few seconds, completely stunned before he started to respond, one hand moving to Cipher's thigh, resting there as he kissed him back, just tasting him, though not for the first time. A thrill shot through his body that this was happening again... and this time in private rather than in front of a thousand or so people. It was longer, gentler... nothing like the fan-service that had happened on stage. After a few moments, he parted, feeling a little more at ease with himself. "I would actually love to watch the pair of you," he gestured at the other couple, "together for at least a little bit. The dynamic intrigues me. Even if it's just for a minute or so."

Kyo's breath caught as he watched Cipher finally kiss Die. He had expected to feel jealousy of some sort but instead, all he could feel from the act was desire to see more. Arousal pooled in his lower stomach and he found himself biting his lip. When they parted, he let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding.

Hiroshi just grinned as he watched his lover kiss the younger guitarist. He could practically see Die's toes curling, and he wanted to laugh. The vocalist shifted slightly then smirked as he felt Kyo tensing next to him. His hand slid upward before he snaked his arm around the smaller man, turning away from the display to press his lips to close to Kyo's ear. "They're rather gorgeous together, aren't they?"

Kyo twitched only slightly when Hiroshi's lips pressed against his ear though it sent goosebumps down his arms. He brought his hand up to rest on Hiroshi's cheek momentarily before licking his lips and nodding. "I agree completely." 

Hiroshi smirked and reached out, cupping Kyo's cheek and turning his head. "I don't think we should let them outdo us though," he murmured with a wink before pressing his lips against Kyo's, engaging him a slow, sensual kiss. 

The younger vocalist let out the softest sound when Hiroshi kissed him, having been expecting it sooner or later, but still shocked to feel the other man's lips on his own. He returned the action though, his fingers moving to lightly push into blond hair.

Die sat for a moment, somehow having expected someone to say something in return to his confession of his wants. After a moment, he craned to see past Cipher, his eyes going wide and his mouth hanging open slightly as he watched Kyo... and Kyo... engage one another. He let out a muffled moan and tilted his head back. "Oh my fuck."

Cipher chuckled and then finished off his wine, taking another piece of sushi and eating it before picking up the plates of it and nodding with Die. "Where are the cats not at? Last thing we need is cats in sushi while we have fun."

Die stood up, finishing off his own glass and putting it on the table, pushing the cork partway into the wine bottle before trailing away from the two men on the couch, gesturing Cipher to follow him so the sushi could go in the fridge. Once there, he opened the fridge and helped put the plates inside. Without another thought on the matter, he closed the door the moment Cipher was done, and pushed the older man against the counter, pressing and holding him there with his own body, wetting his lower lip as he ground his hips sensually against the other man's own. "I've wanted to know how this would be... for longer than is even right."

Cipher was quick to react, his hands on Die's hips, holding onto him and arching back toward him. "That's it, Die…show me what you've got pent up in there."

Hiroshi heard the other two get up and leave, and he smirked, taking a chance and pushing Kyo back against the couch slightly. He moved one hand to rest on the younger's hip, his tongue dipping into his mouth, deepening the kiss. 

Kyo felt a shiver go down his spine as he was pushed back, his hands automatically going to hold onto Hiroshi's shoulders. He couldn't stop the groan that escaped him as their bodies pressed together, revealing that they were both about half-hard. When they parted, he let out a breathless laugh, his cheeks flushed. "I'm not good at really expressing things like this, but I will say that my desire for you goes back a while." 

Hiroshi grinned and leaned in, pressing his hips down, rocking them slightly. "I think you're doing just fine..." He flicked his gaze up and caught Cipher's eyes, shooting him a wink.

Cipher glanced toward the living room as Die's mouth descended on his neck, licking and lightly scraping his teeth over the column of flesh. He caught the wink from his lover and smirked back at him, glad to see the other pair were well on their way to having fun as well. 

Die slid his hands down to cup Cipher's ass, grasping and flexing on the firm flesh, a slight bit of jealousy sliding through him that his idol definitely had a better ass than he did. But certainly not Kyo-level ass.... He grinned a bit, realizing that even while he was there with Cipher, he was still thinking of Kyo in many ways. True love at its finest, he supposed, and he wondered for a moment if, perhaps, Cipher was thinking of his Kyo in much the same manner.

Kyo, loosened by the wine he'd drunk, let out another sound of pleasure, pushing his hips up to grind against Hiroshi's. He tilted his head back, opening his eyes and realizing he could see the action in the kitchen, and that only served to turn him on further. 

Hiroshi moved to nuzzle against Kyo's neck, licking the skin. He pushed his hips down, feeling Kyo's arousal pressing against his thigh, noticing that what he saw on stage was definitely no camera trick or pants fold.

Die's arousal level certainly didn't wait on his mind to catch up, not in the least. For one moment, he almost dove headfirst into it, wanting to rut mindlessly against the other, to feel his hardened dick pressed against him, to know he was making Cipher just as aroused. But a few moments flitted past, and he closed his eyes, steadying himself. And after a deep breath, he offered, "We should all move to the bedroom."

Cipher shifted back from him, a little knowing smirk on his face and held out his hand. Maneuvering Die toward the couch, he paused and held out his hand to his Kyo, Die offering his own to the shorter man.

Both Kyos looked up at their respective lovers came into the living room. Hiroshi moved off the younger Kyo and grabbed Cipher's hand, smirking at him knowingly. Kyo let out a breath and reached out a grasp Die's offered hand, giving him the tiniest look of nervousness as they moved towards the bedroom.

Die pulled his lover to his side, determined to show him some affection in light of the way he'd just been pretty much crawling all over Cipher in the kitchen. He stroked Kyo's side all the way up the stairs, the fact that Cipher didn't let go of his hand making the trip slightly awkward. Once they were up, Die led them to the spare bedroom, and Cipher opened the door, revealing the lovely setup Die had created.

Kyo leaned into Die, accepting the affection gratefully. It grounded him and let him know that this was really going to be okay. He just prayed that he didn't disappoint his partner for the night.

Cipher tilted his head a bit, looking around the room, and then grinning. "I smell Die's suave-ass-self all over this." He slapped the other on the ass end and then moved into the bedroom, going to pick up the various lubes, picking one he obviously liked and placing it on one side of the large bed. He crooked one finger toward his lover. "C'mere... let's give them one of their wishes for a moment, shall we?"

Hiroshi studied the set up and grinned broadly, nodding his head. "Mmhmm. Very impressive, but I find it hilarious that this is something you'd do." He smirked then sauntered over to Cipher, his hands automatically going to the other's hips.

Cipher grinned up at his lover. "Oh... the similarities run deeply, don't ya know." He settled back on the bed and drew the blonde over him, encouraging him to straddle him, already shifting to press his lips to Kyo's neck, nipping lightly at the skin, expert in how harsh he could be without leaving marks. "You're already hard," Hiroshi murmured. "Did he rile you up that much, baby?"

Cipher let out a deep laugh, biting a bit hard on his lover's shoulder. "Mmm… hard not to be." He flicked his gaze to Die, giving him a smoldering look before he picked the blonde up and quite literally tossed him on the bed, following after, sliding between his legs, tugging at his shirt.

Die gaped at the scene before him, his mouth flapping a bit at the look Cipher gave him and the actions that followed. He didn't know what he'd expected... maybe tenderness... gentleness. Certainly not Cipher tossing his lover around like he weighed nothing

Kyo let out a low moan at the bite, then snorted at the pun. He followed Cipher's gaze the pair standing near the doorway, winking to the shorter of the two before letting out a huff at being tossed. He easily shifted, raising his arms to get his shirt free, his legs wrapping around Cipher's waist as he rocked his hips upward.

The younger Kyo found himself in a similar state as Die. He shifted slightly, watching the pair on the bed with fascination. Arousal pooled deep in his stomach, and he found himself pressing against Die's side, desperate for any touch at all.

Die slid his arm tighter around Kyo's waist, holding him close, fingertips sliding up under his shirt. "God, they're gorgeous," he breathed out.

Cipher pulled his own shirt off, tossing it aside and sliding back down over his Kyo, catching one nipple in his mouth, sucking hard, his hips jerking against his lover's own.

Kyo licked his lips, turning to press them to Die's neck for a moment, murmuring against his skin. "They really are...I could just watch them."

The elder Kyo buried his fingers in Cipher's hair, tugging harshly as his hips snapped up. "Ichiro...," he intoned, voice low and deep, full of arousal and need.

Cipher let out a little growl at the treatment from the other. "Save that for your namesake over there, love." With a smirk, he pulled back then, pinning Kyo with a look. "Well... your turn... let's see what you've got in you, hmm?" He backed away from the bed, holding out his hand toward Die in the process.

Die moved forward, taking Cipher's hand in his own, much-steadier one now that the alcohol had kicked in.

Kyo observed the scene playing out before him, more than a little aroused by it. He had to force himself from focusing on the fact that Kyo and Cipher from D'erlanger were currently tumbling around on his guest bed lest he get caught up in the whole idol thing Die was having trouble with before. 

When Cipher informed him it was his turn, he glanced from Die to Cipher to Hiroshi then back to Die. He licked his lips and swallowed down his nerves, moving to the bed and placing his hands on Hiroshi's shoulders. He leaned down to engage the older man in a kiss, finding that to be the easiest starting point and a distraction for himself.

Hiroshi smirked at his lover then looked up at Kyo, smiling encouragingly. When he finally moved over to him and initiated a kiss, he was quick to slide his hands up along his sides then back down, grasping his ample ass and pulling him into his lap. "Relax," he murmured against the younger's lips, nipping the bottom one lightly.

Die squeezed Cipher's hand as he watched the two men roll around on the bed with each other, his eyes tracking them, quite interested in the whole thing. He shivered a bit and then attached himself to Cipher's side. After a few more moments of watching, he lightly pushed Cipher against the wall and then smoothly slid to his knees.

Cipher watched Die as he descended down his body, kneeling in front of him and running his hands over the tent in his pants. He smirked down at him, an arrogant sort of look in his eyes. "You want it, Daisuke? You want my cock in your pretty mouth?"

A laugh flitted from Die's lips as he reached up, unfastening Cipher's belt, his fingers moving quickly to open the four buttons on his jeans. "Do you have to ask?"

Kyo's head turned slightly to watch the exchange between Die and Cipher, showing his tendency towards voyeurism in these moments. He wanted to watch and observe almost as much as he wanted to participate. 

Licking his lips, he took a moment to remove his own shirt before finally turning back to Hiroshi, a smirk on his lips. He shifted down between the other's knees and worked his pants open to reveal that the vocalist was not wearing underwear. He chuckled lowly then wrapped his fingers around Hiroshi's hard length, marveling at how different it felt from Die's. Where Die was long and not really thick, Hiroshi was more like his own, thick and somewhat large.

Hiroshi grinned at his lover's words, shaking his head. Cipher always had a thing for talking dirty. Of course, he knew the redhead guitarist currently on his knees was eager to get on with it probably as much as his lover was. 

He focused his attention back on Kyo, his hand going to the other's short, black hair. "That's it, Kyo...just like that..." He let out a soft moan, enjoying the attention to his cock.

Cipher's tongue snaked out, wetting his lips slightly as he watched Die work, opening his pants to reveal his mostly-hardened length. Die's fingers dipped inside, freeing him from the confines of any material at all, lightly running his knuckles over the other guitarist's sac. With a little moan of appreciation, he leaned in, flicking his tongue quickly over the head of Cipher's cock, his own nearly hurting in the confines of his pants he was so hard from this. Just the idea of getting to do this, much less the actuality of it had him wound up almost unreasonably. Die's hand curled around Cipher's moderately lengthy cock, stroking him up and then back down, fascinated to have another circumcised cock in his grip.

Kyo flicked his gaze to Die and Cipher, watching the older guitarist's length disappear into his lover's mouth. He groaned and glanced back up to Hiroshi, finding the other smirking at him. "Don't let them outdo us, hm?" The younger vocalist grinned then leaned forward, taking Hiroshi's cock between his lips, sucking at the head as he fisted the rest of it, pulling a moan from Hiroshi.

Die heard the words drift from behind him, and he wanted so badly to look... but the other part of him was far too busy with his idol's cock in his mouth. He slid down further on his length, licking and sucking and then outright moaning at the way Cipher's cock fit in his mouth. It was so much different from Kyo's, a giant contrast, and he found he appreciated the difference for the sheer fact of being different.

Cipher pushed his hand into Die's red hair, just resting his hand there while he lazily flicked his gaze between what Die was doing and what was going on on the bed. "Your love is sucking mine off," he informed, his voice a deep, sexual rumble.

Hiroshi caught Cipher's eye and winked. He was quickly coming to the realization that having his lover in the room while they experienced different partners was rather a nice change of pace. He shifted and leaned back on his hand, the other still in Kyo's short hair. 

Kyo groaned softly as he pushed his head down further, beginning to slowly bob it as he moved his hand to cup and fondle Hiroshi's sac.

Die had an even more difficult time not pulling off Cipher's cock to turn to look, but he closed his eyes and concentrated on the cock in his mouth, wanting to give Cipher a sample of how good he could really be at this, working all of his magic.

Cipher smirked down at Die, watching him and truly enjoying what the redhead was doing to him. After a few more seconds though, he gently pushed Die away, holding out his hand. "Bed... so we're all together, and you can see what's happening with them, too."

Die accepted the hand up eagerly, all but dragging the older man off to the bed just after, pushing him down next to Hiroshi and crawling up between his legs, goosing Kyo on the ass before he settled, watching the pair of vocalists for a few moments.

Kyo got into what he was doing, going down on Hiroshi as best as he could, taking most of the other vocalist's cock. The pleased moans he received drove him further, his hand moving to drag up and down Hiroshi's thigh. 

The older of the two let his head drop back as Kyo went to town on his cock, the feeling absolutely amazing. When he overheard his own lover telling Die to move to the bed, he lifted his head and watched them settle in beside them. His free hand strayed to stroke over Cipher's side briefly. 

Kyo let out a strange sound as Die goosed him, his eyes opening and catching his lover's as he sucked Hiroshi off. He slowed his actions, pulling back slightly to swirl his tongue around the other's cock as he peered at his lover, never breaking eye contact.

Die smirked at Kyo, giving him a sultry look a few seconds later before he, too, began to suck the other off, bobbing his head quickly. He whined a bit and then slid down on Cipher's dick with a lewd moan.

Kyo moaned around Hiroshi's cock as Die went after Cipher's. He glanced up at the other vocalist, his hand sliding up to stroke over Hiroshi's bare chest, scratching his nails lightly over the skin there. 

Hiroshi gave Kyo's hair a good tug when the smaller vocalist got back to business on his cock, finding him to have quite the talented mouth. "Hng, Ichiro...you were right...vocalists are good at head."

Cipher reached over, grasping Hiroshi's forearm for a moment. "Yeah... well... guitarists are enthusiastic." He winked down at Die when the other flicked his gaze up toward him.

Die eventually closed his eyes, bobbing his head over the other's length before pushing all the way down, his eyes nearly watering over how far he pushed himself.

Hiroshi grinned, leaning over enough to plant a kiss on Cipher's shoulder. "It certainly seems that." He glanced back down at Kyo, pushing up into his mouth slightly with a moan. Too much more of this and he'd be blowing his load.

Kyo was torn between keeping his eyes closed and focusing on Hiroshi's cock or watching Die deep-throat Cipher. He settled for a combo of both, alternating his attention from one to the other, moaning lowly.

Die grew overzealous with his efforts, bobbing up and down on the other's cock, nearly humping the bed with the level of arousal he was feeling at the moment. He groaned loudly, pulling up to the top and sucking hard before popping off, staring at Cipher nearly wildly, not saying a single word.

Cipher watched Die as well as he could through the haze of arousal Die was creating. When Die popped off his cock, he let out a breathless laugh. "Shit, man... you are damn good at head."

Hiroshi glanced over to the other pair and smirked. "Better than me, love?," he teased, shooting Die a wink and giving his red hair a stroke before burying his hand back in Kyo's hair. "I think Kyo here could give him a run for his money." 

Hearing Cipher praising his lover's technique somehow made Kyo feel almost proud in a way. It was definitely true; Die was indeed very talented with his mouth. That thought and the fact that Hiroshi voiced his own pleasure had him nearly rutting against the bed, his cock aching in the confines of his pants.

Cipher chuckled, reaching over to run his knuckles down the side of Hiroshi's neck. "Mmm... I know better than to answer that, given one of you is my full-time lover and the other is currently going to town on me." He grinned down at Die and gave him a wink though, aiming to make the other as full of pride as possible.

Die climbed up Cipher's body, panting softly as he shifted over the other man, spearing one hand in his hair and giving him a smoldering look. "I'm going to fuck you. Right here. Right in front of everyone. How does that make you feel?"

Cipher's grin only widened, his head tilting back. "Mmm... got a live wire over here, don't I?" In the next instant, his hands shot out, grabbing Die and yanking him close, rolling them over and pinning him. "Fight me for it then, bitch."

Die arched up under him, unable to resist it, nearly growling out a moan before sliding his leg sensuously up Cipher's own, abruptly locking it in place and then twisting, causing both of them to fall off the bed onto the stack of extra blankets he'd put there in case things moved to the floor. "Bitch?" He grappled with Cipher for a moment and then shoved both hands to the floor, holding him tight but not enough to hurt his wrists, knowing that both of their jobs were on the line with anything involving their arms or hands. "Who's the bitch now, Cipher, darling?"

The older vocalist let out a deep laugh then gently tugged Kyo up. Once the other had released his cock, he tugged him up into his lap, sliding his hand around the back of his neck and pulling him forward for a deep kiss. He released him and nodded towards the other pair, smirking as they begin to grapple around, loving seeing them fighting for dominance with each other and wondering if his lover would win as he usually did in their own bedroom 

As Kyo settled in Hiroshi's lap, he reached down to unfasten his own pants, unable to take the pressure anymore. He didn't get much further though as Die and Cipher's tumble caught his attention, and he let out a soft sound as Die's mouth got away from him.

Kyo's moan from above only fueled Die on. He transferred Cipher's hands to one of his own, holding them as tight as he dared, reaching down to fumble open his pants, glad he'd left off the belt tonight. Freeing his cock, he stared down at the older man. "Look at me." He shuddered a bit. "Just fucking look at my cock."

Cipher was staring up at Die like he was the best damn thing since sliced bread, his cock straining out from his body for more than one reason at the moment. Kyo fought him for dominance usually, but never this strongly. They'd rarely ended up tumbling off the bed, and surely Kyo's mouth wasn't nearly as in gear as Die's was. His eyes smoldered with unrestrained passion as he skimmed his eyes down Die's body. He let out a groan as his eyes landed on the other male's cock, impressed by the length of him. "You'd fit just fine," he purred out the instant before he reached up and took a handful of red hair, yanking to the side, toppling Die off of him, "if I fucking let you." He snarled a bit, tossing Die half on the bed, yanking the younger man's pants off in a few swift movements, and then moving behind him, pinning him against the bed. "But we've got to loosen you up for two cocks later, now don't we?"

"Fuck, Ichiro...," Hiroshi groaned out, watching his lover manhandle the younger guitarist. He smirked shifted a bit closer to them, his hand going to stroke over Cipher's hip before finding purchase in Die's hair, winking at him. "You're in for a real treat, Die...you've got him riled up now, and there'll be no stopping him." He released Die then turned back to Kyo, grabbing his hips and flipping him over onto the bed. He quickly rid him of his pants then stripped his own off before burying his face against the vocalist's neck, nipping the skin lightly then moving further south. He found and followed Kyo's treasure trail, noting with a smirk that the other was trimmed neatly, something he appreciated. The older vocalist took Kyo's thick length in hand then began working his tongue over the head, slicking it up before wrapping his lips around it and pushing down, taking more and more of Kyo's cock into his mouth. 

Kyo decided that he could very nearly cum from just watching Die and Cipher fight one another. The sight of Die pinned to the bed by the other guitarist was one that would remain in his memory for a very long time. A startled gasp left him as he was flipped onto the bed but he was quick to dig his fingers into Hiroshi's hair, his other hand falling out beside him, landing atop Die's arm. He turned to look at his lover before letting out a deep moan as Hiroshi's mouth descended on him, making his hips buck up. "A-ah..Ky--Hiroshi!"

Die tried to move against the bed, utterly helpless in his current position to get his dominance back. His cock throbbed with the desire to be deep inside Cipher's body, and he strained, whimpering slightly as Hiroshi's hand slid into his hair for a moment. He stared at the other, relaxing for a moment, giving the illusion he'd given in. 

For a moment, Cipher didn't do anything more than watch the other pair on the bed, his eyes taking in Kyo's endowment, his eyebrow arching slightly. Leaning down, he pressed his lips to Die's ear, stage-whispering into his ear, intentionally loud enough so Kyo could hear him, "You take all of that, Die? And you want Kyo's cock and mine in your ass at the same time?" He breathed out a chuckle. "May as well fucking fist you, you slut."

Die groaned at the way the other dirty talked to him. His hand moved to grasp Kyo's that had been resting on his arm, fingers squeezing as he stared at the elder Kyo as he sucked his lover off. He groaned rather loudly, his other hand coming up to grab Cipher's hair, pulling harder than he'd ever actually pulled someone's hair before. "Either stick your fucking dick in me or get off me, fucker."

"How about," Cipher's hips jerked forward, "I get off on you. Just to torture you?"

Die very nearly lost his fragile control on not going full-on smack-down on getting his way, closing his eyes, trembling slightly, his hand gripping Kyo's hard. When he opened his eyes again, that same fire that had burned deep within them the night he'd dominated Kyo and shoved him over into the pillows and comforters had surfaced, that forbidden desire written completely across his face.

Kyo bit his lip as Die squeezed his hand harshly. He could see his lover's control breaking, and he wanted to intervene yet he knew in this case, it wasn't his place. He raised an eyebrow then flicked his eyes to Cipher and back to Die before smirking a little and bringing Die's fingers to his lips, nipping a knuckle, kissing the skin after before releasing him. Hiroshi's mouth was doing a good job of working him towards his end though he desperately didn't want to go there just yet. He finally lightly tugged the other's hair to get his attention. "Fuck me," he quietly requested, not even thinking of putting up a fight like Die had. 

Hiroshi was greatly amused by the exchange between the other two, his eyes glancing over to see the desperate look on Die's face. He mentally wished the guitarist luck as he began bobbing his head over Kyo's cock, setting a good rhythm only to have it broken by the younger's fingers in his hair. He glanced up and listened to his request, his head lifting off Kyo's cock shortly after. "Mm, if you insist," he replied, moving off to gather up one of the bottles of lube and a condom.

Cipher pushed Die even more against the bed, reaching toward his lover. "Baby, hand me the lube and a couple condoms?" He wasn't stupid, this wasn't going to be a one-off, not for anyone involved, he was sure. And Die was basically squirming under him, obviously in need of a great many things.

Hiroshi gathered up the requested items for Cipher, handing him strawberry scented lube and three condoms, smirking a bit. "Going to attempt to tame the beast there, love?"

"There ain't no taming this one. He's a fighter." Cipher chuckled a bit as he accepted the items and dumped all but the lube in front of Die. He leaned over and nipped his ear. "Do you want this, Die?"

Cipher's question seemed to quell the fire inside Die, and he deflated somewhat, relaxing against the bed, loosening his grip on Kyo's hand. "Yes... please."

"Mmm... that's better," the older guitarist murmured, kissing Die's cheek and then backing off a bit, lubing his fingers and then sliding them down Die's crack. When he reached the other's puckered entrance, he slowly sank two fingers into him, smirking. "He accepts me so easily."

Hiroshi snorted and sat there for a moment, watching Cipher's fingers disappear into Die's body. After a moment, he shifted and spread Kyo's legs, pouring a good amount of lube onto his fingers then slipping them between Kyo's legs. He tested first one then two digits inside the vocalist's body, greatly enjoying the slight clenching of the other's muscles. "Mm, so does Kyo, but I get the feeling he'd rather I didn't waste too much time on prep." He smirked and looked up at the younger. "You like the pain, don't you?" 

Kyo felt the defeat come over his lover, and he almost spoke up but then remembered that it was between Die and Cipher. He just hoped his lover would be satisfied either way. 

Fingers pushing into his body robbed him of all rational thought, a quiet moan of ascent leaving him at what he thought was perhaps a rhetorical question.

"I'll bet..." he plunged his fingers into Die, making the guitarist pant, "you're going to refuse to cum for me just so you have a reason to fuck me afterward, won't you?" Cipher hissed out.

Die shuddered a bit and then let out a snarl. "I'm going to fuck you stupid. You haven't won, Cipher... not by far."

"So says the man with my fingers in his asshole." Cipher bit down on Die's shoulder enough to make the other guitarist yelp, chuckling just after.

Hiroshi quickly finished up prepping Kyo, pulling his fingers free and wiping them off before grabbing the condom and rolling it over his cock. He added more lube then situated himself between Kyo's legs, slowly sliding into the other's tight body. "Mmnn, Gods yes, Kyo...your body is so damn tight." He smirked, shooting his own lover a dirty smile, letting him know he was enjoying the exchange between the two guitarists. 

Kyo groaned as Hiroshi went about methodically stretching him. He appreciated the way the other didn't take too much time with it, and soon he was being filled with Hiroshi's cock, a shudder running down his spine. Hiroshi's cock had more girth than Die's and so it was stretching him in new ways, a sensation he enjoyed greatly. "Gods...," he breathed out, focusing entirely on that for the moment though his hand was still firmly within Die's grip.

Die's argumentative nature in the situation completely slid away as he watched Kyo take Hiroshi's length so easily. He groaned, his own cock throbbing at the sight. It was something he'd dreamed of... watching Kyo take it from someone else. Though usually, he hadn't thought he'd be doing the same while watching.

Cipher thrust his fingers into Die's body a few more times before pulling them out and grabbing a condom, opening it and rolling it down his length, tossing the foil aside and then positioning himself. He drizzled some more lube on his cock and then held Die's hips, thrusting inside. He didn't give Die but a second to adjust before he was thrusting hard and fast, the sharp staccato of flesh-on-flesh echoing through the room.

Die cried out when Cipher penetrated him. "Yes!" The word slipped out before he could even think to stop it, his back arching, his cock pressing firmly against the bed in front of him, muscles straining. It was Cipher's cock that was thrusting into him, and Die wasn't sure he could take it for long, the thought along getting him off, much less the thrusting and the fact that he was watching Hiroshi's cock as he buried himself into Kyo's ass, his lover's face a mask of bliss. His fingers tightened on Kyo's hand again, though this time in desperation to hang onto himself and not completely embarrass himself by being the first to cum.

Kyo could see the pleasure written all over his lover's face, knowing that it wasn't just from what was happening to his own body. Die was actually enjoying seeing him with Hiroshi, and somehow, that turned him on further. He shifted to wrap his legs around the older Kyo's waist, bucking his hips up to meet his movements. He squeezed Die's hand hard then smirked a little, a devious little thought popping into his head. "Oh Gods…Die...baby…Kyo is fucking me...right now...it feels so fucking good," he moaned out, getting louder with each word. 

Hiroshi bit his lip as he began thrusting into the younger man's body with short, quick thrusts, building up the speed fairly quickly. If he wasn't careful, he would be the first to come, and that was against his own personal rules.

Die let out a choked moan when Kyo started talking dirty to him, intentionally using the elder Kyo's stage name, planting other devious thoughts in his mind as he watched the pair. His fingers clawed into the bed, and for a second he had to bow his head and close his eyes, just focusing on Cipher's forceful thrusts behind him. "Feels... so different," he gasped out before pushing his face into the mattress and letting out quite a few incoherent noises, nearly on sensory overload.

Cipher continued fucking Die with all he had, watching his cock disappear into the younger's body for a while before he looked up and watched his lover sink into Kyo's body. "That's right… fuck him hard, baby."

The younger vocalist was quickly wrapped up in his own pleasure, increasingly louder cries of Hiroshi's name, mostly his stage name, sounding from his lips as he held on for dear life. It felt so good, in an entirely different way than with Die. Kyo was outright fucking him, there was no tenderness or such between them, and that changed the dynamic completely.

Hiroshi glanced over at his lover and winked before snapping his hips hard against Kyo's, earning yet another moan of pleasure. He found that he enjoyed hearing evidence of the other's great vocal range even in the primal sounds spilling from his lips now. He hunched over him, laving his tongue over his throat then moved to bite an area on his chest that had received abuse before, lines of scars causing the skin to be raised. "Ah, fuck, yes!"

Die clawed at the bed, covers pulling toward him, fabric bunched up in his fists as Cipher's thrusts grew more insistent behind him. He let out a few choked sounds and then all but screamed, unable to hang on any longer, Cipher's cock finally finding his prostate and slamming mercilessly into it. His cock throbbed against the bed, coating the side of the sheets in his offering, his dick still pushing through the mess as Cipher only sped up behind him.

"You've lost it, haven't you, Daisuke? You just fucking jizzed all over the mattress, didn't you?" The older guitarist's hand slid into Die's hair, tugging his head back, baring his pleasured face to both Kyo's views.

Upon hearing his lover scream, Kyo turned his head to watch, seeing the tell-tale movements and jerks of his lover's body as the other finally came with what appeared to be quite a bit of intensity. A low moan rumbled from his lips when Cipher pulled his head up, exposing the sexiest look he'd ever seen on Die's face. The very idea sent heat flooding his abdomen, and he finally reached between himself and Hiroshi, jerking his own cock hard. 

Hiroshi just smirked as he listened to Die lose it, knowing the feel of Cipher's cock bringing him to completion all too well. He shifted and wrapped his hand around Kyo's, aiding in pleasuring him as he slammed harder into his pliant body.

Die eventually sort of sagged against the bed, watching the pair in front of him, little whimpering sounds issuing from him every few seconds. Intentionally, he squeezed around Cipher's cock, intent on repaying him with being the second one off.

Die's efforts weren't wasted, the intensity of Die's inner walls clamping down on Cipher's cock drawing him closer and closer to the edge with each thrust he made into the younger guitarist's body. "That's right... grip my fucking prick!" he snarled out against Die's ear, thrusting hard into him a few more times. 

Almost abruptly, Cipher pulled out, yanked off his condom, and pulled Die off the side of the bed, pushing him down on the floor. Straddling his chest, he jacked himself quickly and then started to cum with a choked sounding grunt, cum spurting out thick from his cock, splattering across Die's face.

The redhead closed his eyes and opened his mouth, just waiting on what he knew was going to happen. When the warm liquid began to splash down over his face, he let out possibly the most whorish moan he'd ever let out.

Cipher stroked himself until he was finished, settling back and then licking his lips, his hand trailing over Die's collarbones. "He likes it so much," he purred out, "so much I bet he'd get hard again if he got two more loads." There was a hinting tone to his voice, and he flicked his gaze to both Kyo's, arching an eyebrow in question.

Kyo was so close to cumming and very nearly lost it when Hiroshi's hand wrapped around his own. He held off though, for just a bit longer and was grateful he did when Cipher yanked Die off the bed and presumably jizzed all over him. He could barely see Die's cum-soaked face from his vantage point on the bed, though it was enough to make him moan. 

Hiroshi chuckled at his lover's antics, loving when he got feisty like that. At the unspoken request in Cipher's voice, he pulled out of Kyo and tugged him towards the edge of the bed. He got up and moved to stand beside Die, tugging the condom off and tossing it as he started jerking off, groaning lowly as he did. 

Kyo followed along with Hiroshi's example, moving to kneel besides Die's face, smirking a little. He reached out and got a handful of Die's hair, yanking his head up just enough to push the tip of his cock between his lips. Another few strokes and he was cumming, moaning loudly as he spilled the first bit down Die's throat then pulled back, painting his face, mixing it with Cipher's. 

The elder Kyo wasn't far behind, jerking off furiously for a moment then letting out a low sound as he came, spattering it all over Die's chest.

Die lay there, panting as he was basically used as a cum depository for all three men. The feeling of someone yanking his hair had him opening his mouth wider, someone's cock in his mouth. His tongue swiped out, slicking over the heated flesh before he got a shot of cum right across his tongue, and then the rest over his face. He swallowed what he'd been given and relaxed there, waiting on the third. When he got it, he moaned again, his cock doing exactly what Cipher had predicted and starting to stiffen again.

Cipher watched the proceedings and smirked a bit, reaching over to Kyo and sliding his finger over the slightly-damp tip of his cock, taking the last bead of cum and then shifting to Hiroshi, pushing the digit into his mouth, leaning over to hiss in his ear, "Taste it... taste his cum. You know you wanted it."

Kyo sat back on his knees, panting heavily as he stared at his debauched lover, covered in three men's worth of cum. It was sexy as hell, and he found he wished he had his camera with him right then. Cipher's finger on his cock had him moaning, his sensitive length twitching from the touch. He watching as the guitarist lifted that finger to Hiroshi's lips and pushed it past the plush tiers.

Hiroshi was quick to accept Cipher's finger, sucking it clean then swirling his tongue around the digit. He smirked a little at his lover's words then nodded before releasing Cipher's finger. He glanced at Kyo then to Die and leaned down, revealing one of his own fetishes as he began to lick the cum from Die's face, eventually pushing his tongue into the younger's mouth with a soft groan.

Die gasped to feel someone licking the cum off of him. He just let it happen, finding that he knew instinctively it wasn't his fiancé doing it. When the kiss was offered, he took it, one hand raising to delve into Hiroshi's hair, moaning to realize it wasn't even Cipher doing it to him, his dick fully hard.

Cipher shifted himself off Die's body, moving grab the lube, starting to prep himself to be able to repay Die what he'd wanted to start with.

Kyo watched as Hiroshi lapped cum from his lover and found the scene arousing. He shifted back a little then turned to see what Cipher was doing. He let out a soft sound then took the lube, smirking a little. "Let me..." Squirting a good bit on his fingers, he shifted behind Cipher a little bit, lightly running his fingers along his crack before pushing a single digit into his body. 

Hiroshi finally pulled back, licking his lips like a cat then turning to see what the other two were up to. A low chuckle rumbled past his lips and he leaned down, putting his mouth right by Die's ear. "Look Daisuke, Kyo's getting Cipher's ass ready for you..."

Cipher allowed Kyo to help him, biting his lip a little so he didn't make sounds to alert Die as to what was going on just yet. When his lover gave him away, he opened one eye to smirk at him, amused.

Die opened his eyes when he was basically told it was safe, sitting up just enough to get a corner of the comforter he was on and start mopping up his saliva-slicked face. "Mmm... prep him right, baby," he murmured to Kyo before looking up at the other vocalist, smirking a bit. "Tell me... did you enjoy it?"

Hiroshi winked at Cipher then turned to Die, grinning widely. "Of course...that's one fine piece of ass you've got there." He chuckled then dipped his hand down, stroking Die's cock lightly, bringing him to full hardness. 

Kyo smirked at Die, adding a second finger, scissoring his fingers inside Cipher's body. He could tell the guitarist wouldn't need much prep so he focused on bringing him a bit of pleasure while he was at it, thrusting both digits in rather roughly, curling them in just the right spot.

Die groaned as this new touch came to his cock, completely different than any before it. He bit his lower lip, closing his eyes. "Yeah..." he breathed out, "he does have a nice ass."

Cipher shifted slightly, hanging onto the bed enough so he wouldn't fall over, bowing his head as Kyo worked on him. He almost opened his mouth to tell Kyo where to go with his fingers, but the vocalist found it all by himself, and he let out a long moan, his cock starting to swell between his legs.

Hiroshi just grinned, stroking Die with long, languid strokes, built to arouse, not get off. 

Kyo smirked at the moan Cipher let out, focusing his fingers more on the other's prostate, thrusting his fingers right against it. He paused long enough to add a third then continued with what he was doing for a bit longer before finally pulling his fingers away. He wiped them off on the corner of one of the blankets then sat back, licking his lips.

Cipher let out a soft sigh when Kyo's fingers slid from his body. He shifted out of the floor and up onto the bed, lying back. "I suggest you get your ass-end up here and fuck me, Die... or I'm going to let Kyo do it for you."

Die's response was immediate. He scrambled up from the floor, snatching up one of the condoms, noting it was super lubed and knowing how Kyo tended to lubricate meant it would be enough. He yanked the wrapper off and rolled it over his cock before sliding onto the bed, hooking his arms under Cipher's knees and shifting into place. But there, he paused, just watching Cipher, smirking a bit. "Ask for it."

Cipher arched one eyebrow and then huffed, looking away. "Not at chance."

"Oh... okay, I see how it is then," Die returned, smirking as he settled back, looking off around the room in a rather exaggerated manner.

Both Kyos moved back onto the bed, settling next to each other but not engaging in physical activity for the moment. They watched Die settled himself between Cipher's legs and refuse to move, an action the pulled smirks from both vocalists. The elder of the two glanced from Cipher and Die and back then licked his lips, cocking his head. "Mm, baby, I think he wants you to beg...be a good love, and fulfill his deepest fantasies, hm?" he crooned, unable to keep the smile from his face.

Cipher rolled his eyes at Kyo's comment. "Mmmhmm, I know what he wants. And I'm being stubborn..." his voice dipped, "for a reason." 

Die gave him a look and then shrugged. "As am I." He flicked his gaze to both Kyo's giving them a meaningful look.

Kyo looked at his lover and shook his head. It was amusing to him to see the stubborn streak in both of them. He shifted and settled against the headboard, crooking his finger at Hiroshi. 

Hiroshi chuckled and moved up beside Kyo, giving his lover's hair a sharp tug on his way. He settled next to the younger vocalist and looked him. "We have our hands full, don't we?"

Die stared at Cipher for a long few minutes before finally issuing, "I said fucking ask for it!"

Cipher's lips split into a grin, and he laughed, tilting his head back. "There it is. There's my boy's loss of control." He settled in and then grunted, "Make me."

Die's reaction this time was immediate, not used to being denied what he wanted, plus that volatile streak from before welling up into something he felt almost incapable to stop. With a snarl, he pushed himself up off the bed, snatching up the largest of the dildos he'd left out and then coming back, pushing it into Cipher without so much as warning of what he was doing. Within a few thrusts he'd found Cipher's prostate and began rapidly abusing it. "Ask for it! Ask for my cock!"

Cipher strained up under the relentless thrusting of the plastic cock, his own dick so hard it was ruddy in color, his balls drawing up tight in a matter of a few seconds. His hands reached up, grabbing the edge of the headboard and clinging to it as Die mercilessly fucked him with the fake cock. "Not. Yet."

Kyo had to bite his lip to keep from groaning at the display happening in front of him. He shifted and placed his hand over his rapidly hardening cock, giving a couple of strokes to ease the strain. 

Hiroshi shifted and moved to straddle Kyo's lap, reaching over and grabbing the Fleshlight he'd spotted earlier. He added lube to the toy then shooed Kyo's hand away from his length, sliding the toy down over it instead. 

Kyo let his head drop back against the very same headboard Cipher was holding onto as Hiroshi slid the slicked up toy down over his cock. He groaned and pushed his hips up into it for a moment then grabbed the other man's wrist. "Together," he murmured. 

Hiroshi was quick to comply, pulling the Fleshlight off of Kyo then pressing his cock against the younger's before sliding the toy over them both, moaning at the nearly too tight feeling. "A-ah..."

Die let out a snarl, pulling the toy out of Cipher's asshole and tossing it down on the blankets below. He stepped back from the bed and crossed his arms, just standing there, completely not touching Cipher at all. "Relent," he ground out, his gaze flicking over to watch the other two on the bed, both of them using the same Fleshlight. His cock throbbed at the thought of being inside that toy, and he flicked his gaze back to Cipher. "Fucking do it, or I'll just get myself off."

Cipher didn't let himself get distracted by what was happening beside him, he just smirked at Die as the guitarist got more and more worked up. Watching Die carefully, he murmured, "What's so important about it anyway? Just fuck me into the bed like you were going to before, Die." The words were intentionally built to try to persuade Die to give up his position on the whole thing, though he suspected that it wouldn't happen, and that sort of thrilled him.

Kyo raised his eyes to look at his lover's face, seeing the determination there. He groaned faintly, hips jerking into the Fleshlight, already feeling as though he could cum. Hiroshi moved the Fleshlight over their cocks for a bit more then had to abandon it, pulling it off and setting it aside. He took to rutting slightly against Kyo, leaning in to lick and nip lightly at his neck. "This fight is interesting, hm?"

Die wetted his lips and cocked his head away, intentionally trying to portray he was ignoring Cipher and thus all of his pleas or wants for the time being. He wasn't entirely sure why he was so hell-bent on having Cipher plead for him, but perhaps it was something to do with the fact that he hadn't won in dominance last time, and he didn't want to 'given in' to him this go around either. He'd asked for something, and he was damn well going to get it.

Cipher just laid there, his arms behind his head, now watching the pair off to the side of him, attempting to wait Die out, casting Hiroshi an amused look.

Hiroshi snorted lightly as neither guitarist gave up their fight. He continued moving slowly against Kyo, just enjoying the pleasure and not ramping it up. Part of him wanted to get off watching Die completely dominate his spitfire of a lover. 

Kyo groaned softly, digging his fingers into Hiroshi's blond locks, arching his hips up. He cast his eyes up to Die's face then let them travel southward, pausing to take in just how hard his lover's cock was.

Cipher finally grew tired of waiting, his excitement starting to ramp off, and he finally let out a laugh. "Alright... you win, Die. Get over here, and give me your cock."

Die shot him a look. "Say please."

"Please," the older guitarist offered, amusement written all over his face. "I beg you, Daisuke. Come give it to me."

Satisfied, Die made his way back to the bed and slid between the older guitarist's thighs, steadying his cock as he shifted forward and then started to push into his body with a groan. "Oh fuck yes."

Hiroshi let out a laugh as Die got his way. He then shifted back and grabbed a lubed condom, rolling it over Kyo's length and adding a bit more lube before moving to straddle him again, slowly sinking down onto his cock with a groan. It was a tight fit but he was just relaxed enough from his recent orgasm for there to not be any noticeable pain. "Ah, fuck...Kyo.."

Kyo was a bit surprised when the other vocalist began rolling a condom onto his cock. Surprise turned to pleasure though as his cock was engulfed in tight heat, his hips jerking up slightly. "Fuck yes...," he breathed out, hands going to hold onto Hiroshi's hips.

Die paused once he was inside, just feeling Cipher around him, allowing his body to actually realize he was fucking Cipher, not Kyo. Slowly, he pulled out and then slid back in, finding that the angle was slightly different for Cipher than it was for Kyo, a little smirk sliding across his lips at the detail. Slowly, he started to thrust, pushing his way in and then pulling back out, setting a steady, but not frantic pace.

Cipher slid his arms behind his head, watching Die as the guitarist set about thrusting into him. He brought his legs up, smirking as Die slid his arms back under his knees, the way he had been before, affording him the angle that felt far better. Die's long, slim cock inside him was so much different than having Hiroshi in him... in fact, it was different than any lover he'd ever let have their way with him. Completely unique. He slid one arm out and touched Kyo's arm, stroking over it to get his attention. "Die's cock is unique... I've never had anyone like this before," he murmured, "feel special. He fits so easily, like the Gods built him for this."

Kyo turned to look at Cipher when he felt the other touch him. He licked his lips and let out a soft groan, nodding his head. "I...a-ah...know...he feels perfect to me..." He glanced at Die, smiling then turning back to Hiroshi, focusing on pushing up into his fellow vocalist. 

Hiroshi chuckled lowly against Kyo's neck at Cipher's admission, raising his head to smirk at him. "Careful now, love, I might get jealous," he teased, smiling after to let all involved know he was just playing.

Cipher reached to pinch Hiroshi's arm and chuckled. "Mmm... maybe if you are jealous, you can reclaim me when we get home," he purred out before refocusing on Die, who had paused for the duration of the conversation.

Die smirked down at him and then licked his lips, starting to thrust into the older man again. "Talk to me about it, Cipher... tell me how much you like it."

Cipher arched up toward Die and then shuddered a bit. "Your cock feels so good... so very good."

Hiroshi chuckled and winked. "I'll take you up on that offer." He got quiet and focused on rocking his hips, pushing himself down repeatedly on Kyo's cock, groaning. "So damn thick...hnng.." 

Kyo shuddered at his lover's dirty commands, finding that he enjoyed hearing them even if they weren't directed to himself. He slid his hands back to grab Hiroshi's ass, raising his knees and thrusting up into his body hard and fast, earning a moan from the other vocalist.

Die glanced over at the others, watching Kyo fuck Hiroshi somewhat furiously. Flicking his gaze back to Cipher, he sped up, matching Kyo's pace unconsciously, their hips syncing up, Cipher straining up toward him.

Kyo kept up the pace, glancing over at Die and noticing they were in sync. He smirked a bit, dragging his hands up over Hiroshi's ass then up his back. "Fuck..."  
Cipher gasped softly, arching up toward the redhead, licking his lips and then reaching down to touch his cock. "You feel so good, Die... your cock feels amazing buried inside me."

Die ground out a pleasured sigh, thrusting faster and harder into the other man's body.

Hiroshi groaned, his eyes straying to his lover's face, loving the look on it. He rode Kyo's cock, hissing out when the other's nails dug into his skin. After a few more minutes, he pulled off and shifted onto his back right against Cipher, his legs spread. 

Kyo let out a soft sound of protest at the loss of the warm body in which he was pounding his cock into. He shifted and moved back between Hiroshi's legs, spreading them slightly then pushing inside him, ramping back up quickly.

Die took note of the new position of the other two, reaching for Kyo's hand. He placed it on Cipher's cock and then slid his own hand over to jerk off Hiroshi, hoping the contrast would be magnificent to both of them.

Kyo groaned lowly as his hand was placed on Cipher's cock. He wrapped his fingers around the unfamiliar shaft and started jerking him off, loving the different feel all together of it. 

Hiroshi moaned and bucked into Die's hand and Kyo's thrusts, his breath coming out in pants. He turned and leaned his head over, pressing his lips to Cipher's shoulder, smiling at the slightly damp flesh. Cipher groaned as Kyo touched his dick, hips jerking up into it, loving the difference of having the person who was thrusting jerking him off versus this. It was on a completely different rhythm, utterly changed from the way Die would have been doing it.

Kyo kept up a smooth pace of stroking Cipher off and thrusting into Hiroshi. It was almost like sensory overload to be feeling so many different sensations at once, and yet he found it thrilling. "Fuck yeah..."

Hiroshi, for his part, was getting close to his second orgasm of the night and found himself wondering how his lover was faring. He pushed his hips up more insistently, panting.

Die let out a groan, his thrusts growing faster and faster, less controlled as he ramped up toward his orgasm. Throwing his head back, he let out a loud cry, slamming into Cipher so hard the bed thumped into the wall as he did it. And then... just like that... it was over, bliss flooding through him as he filled the barrier between them with a soft sigh, his hips stilling, eyelids fluttering shut.

Cipher grew louder as Die fucked him, jerking his hips up into Kyo's hand, feeling the way Die slammed into him and enjoying it immensely. And when Die started to cum, he calmed down, despite hanging on the edge of his own orgasm.

Kyo, try as he might, couldn't hold on with the way Die was reacting next to him. He thrust hard into Hiroshi and let out a sound of his own before his entire body shudder with his orgasm as he filled the condom. He had to drop his hand from Cipher's dick in order to hold onto Hiroshi's knees to keep himself up right, his chest heaving with pants.

Hiroshi groaned as he felt Kyo cumming, his body clenching around the other vocalist's cock. When the other stilled and rested against his knees, he took a deep breath and looked over at his lover, smirking a bit.

Cipher groaned, watching Die and then Kyo cum. He shuddered a bit and then settled, restraining himself from actually falling over that edge, wetting his lips slightly. "Jesus fuck, Die!"

Die stared at him for a long few moments and then chuckled, closing his eyes again. "God that felt amazing."

Kyo pulled out gingerly and rid himself of the condom, tying it off and tossing it in the bin. He settled besides Hiroshi and grinned, his expression akin to one of someone that was high. "Amazing indeed..."

Hiroshi chuckled lowly, shifting to a more upright position. "Absolutely... Die, I don't know how you handle that monster..."

Die slowly pulled out and tugged his condom off as well, tossing it in the trash, sighing softly. He slid his hands over Cipher's torso and then slid down, licking over his cock a few times before sitting up and licking his lips. He just sat there, staring at Cipher for a moment before laughing and glancing over at the pair of Kyos. 

Cipher arched an eyebrow and then chuckled, shaking his head. "You just can't get enough, can you?" He glanced at Kyo. "Is he always like this?"

The younger vocalist groaned softly as he watched his lover fellate Cipher. He had a feeling that he'd be jerking off to that image for a long time. Chuckling to himself, he shifted and pushed Die's hair off his face, smirking up at Cipher. "Oh yes, and I love every minute of it." 

Hiroshi reached over and gave Cipher's hair a light tug. "You're one to talk, love..."

Cipher snorted. "Okay... five years ago, yeah... probably. But these days..." he gestured, "the reboot time is a bit longer." 

Die reached over, tugging Kyo closer and laying one on him, all but shoving his tongue down his throat as he kissed him harshly.

Hiroshi just laughed and reached down, stroking over his still hard cock with a soft grunt. 

Kyo blinked in surprise at the sudden kiss but quickly returned it, digging his hand into Die's hair and tugging roughly as he fought for dominance.

Die let out a snarl against Kyo's lips, taking his one advantage over the other man - his height - and arched Kyo back before plopping him on the bed and crawling over him, straddling his lap. Pulling back, he stared down at Kyo, his eyes burning bright. "Wasn't there a promise made to double-fuck me?"

Cipher watched, his eyebrow arched as the pair flopped over. At the comment, he snorted. "Classy, Die." Sitting up, he snatched up a condom and quickly rolled it on. "It'll be easier if I'm the only one with a condom... have you guys... you know... without it?"

Kyo growled and bit Die's lip for his trouble as his back hit the bed. He was quick to grasp Die's hips, digging his nails into the flesh there. When Die pulled back and spoke, he smirked, pushing his hips up slightly. He calmed down after a moment then turned to peer at Cipher, nodding his head. "We do almost exclusively without now...so there's no problem there."

Hiroshi shifted and moved into a better position to watch the proceedings, unsure of where he'd fit in but confident that he'd find a spot once things got going. Perhaps he'd just mount Cipher from behind while his lover was buried in Die's ass.

Cipher opened the condom and rolled it onto his own dick, tossing the package aside before shifting around and then reaching to lightly tip Die's chin up, looking him in the eyes. "This will be much better for you if you let someone prep you correctly first, understood?"

Die nodded, licking at his wounded lower lip, looking purely excited.

The older guitarist glanced over at Kyo and then murmured, "Kyo? Would you like me to walk you through this... in case... he gets a wild hair... or you do... and someone wants two something's inside at some point again?"

Kyo peered a Cipher, a frisson of excitement going through him. Even though they'd been going at it all evening, something about this part had his stomach quivering with anticipation. He licked his lips and nodded. "Yes, please..."

Cipher gently patted at Die's side. "Move, sweet ass." He chuckled. "Okay..." he moved to look over the lubes as Die shifted off of Kyo, standing awkwardly by the bed for a moment. "Put some pillows under you and sort of lay your head on Hiroshi's stomach so he can soothe you if you need it, okay?" He glanced at his lover and then selected a thick lube that seemed not to dry out as quickly.

Die did as he was told and then settled down, three pillows under him, his legs spread, ass in the air, and his head on Hiroshi's stomach.  
Hiroshi was quick to thread his fingers in Die's hair, brushing the red locks back with a grin. "And don't forget that if you're uncomfortable, you say so right then before it goes any further." 

Kyo watched Die get into position then shifted a bit so he could see what Cipher was doing. Cipher glanced at Kyo and then arched an eyebrow. "Oh you aren't sitting this shit out, man, you're the one doing it." He handed the lube over. "I hope you're not squeamish about sticking your fingers in his ass."

Kyo looked at Cipher and blushed just slightest bit, having misunderstood. He cleared his throat and moved fully behind Die, next to Cipher. "There's very little I'm squeamish about, actually..."

"Good." He leaned in and whispered where Die couldn't hear him, "’cause you're gonna have your hand up his asshole. Your whole hand." He chuckled and then handed the lube over. "Start like you normally would... but with more lube than usual... and more gentleness. Don't work him up if at all possible."

Kyo's eyes popped open as Cipher whispered in his ear. He bit his lip hard to keep from groaning aloud, the very idea making his cock begin to harden. "Okay..." He took the lube and squirted nearly double what he normally used onto his fingers. He smeared it around a bit then shifted forward, resting one hand on Die's back as he pushed two fingers into his already loosened body, slowly working them in and out. "Like this?"

Cipher nodded, smirking a bit.

Die shifted slightly, leaning into Hiroshi's touch, closing his eyes. "It feels so nice," he murmured softly.

Hiroshi hummed, continuing to pet Die. "Mhm, it does..." 

Kyo quickly added a third finger, pausing for a moment to pour more lube into his hand. He worked them in and out for a long time, spreading them out as much as possible while still be gentle and thorough.

Die breathed out a chuckle. "Does that mean that you've done this before?" he asked softly. Die honestly wasn't even remotely phased by the whole thing, fitting three fingers just fine given his regular taking of Kyo's cock.

Hiroshi nodded, moving his hand to rest on Die's back for the moment. "We've dabbled a good bit over the years, and this sort of thing has occurred more than a few times..."

Kyo glanced at Cipher then finally pulled his hand free from Die's body. He added more lube, coating the side of his hand and pinky well. Folding his fingers together slightly, he pushed four into Die this time, going much slower now.

Cipher nodded and smirked, leaning in to whisper in Kyo's ear, "You know exactly what you're doing already, don't you? Have you imagined doing it to him before?"

The singer let out a soft breath and nodded, leaning back slightly to show his fully hard length. He turned his head and put his lips against Cipher's ear. "Many times..." He moved back to what he was doing, pushing his fingers further inside Die, as far as he could go, his thumb pressed against Die's body. "How is it, Die? Does it hurt?"

Die had his eyes closed, his fingers repeatedly stroking over Hiroshi's stomach, his teeth worrying his lower lip as he stroked at the soft skin. In response to Kyo's question, he murmured, "I'm doing... just... great." He wet his lips and rubbed his cheek against Hiroshi's skin. "Hnngg..."

Cipher chuckled softly, reaching down to start slowly stroking off Kyo, lowering his head to start nipping and sucking at the skin of his neck. "You have," his free hand slid down to grope at his ass, "the best fucking ass."

Hiroshi took to stroking his hand up and down Die's back, make sure the younger kept calm and still. He knew precisely what was going on behind him and knew that it could feel amazing but also overwhelming. 

Kyo paused when Cipher's hand wrapped around his cock. He let out a low moan, his free hand coming up to thread into the guitarist's hair, pushing his ass into the touch. He chuckled deeply, smirking as he went back to moving his hand, opening his fingers as well as he could. "Thank you..."

Cipher licked up his neck and then began flicking his tongue over his earlobe, his eyes on what Kyo was doing. Die was squirming slightly under the touches, the four fingers spreading a bit more overwhelming than he'd expected it to be. Much to his surprise, he was aroused as hell, but he wasn't actually hard... and that in and of itself confused him.

Kyo shuddered as Cipher's tongue hit one of the most sensitive areas on his body. Biting his lip, he finally pulled his hand back and tucked his thumb against his palm. He poured more lube and smeared it all over his hand and even onto his wrist. Finally, he began pushing all five fingers into Die's body, going slowly as possible. Once all fingers were fully inside, he rotated his hand then closed it into a fist, groaning at the way Die's walls tightened around his hand. "Oh…Gods.."

Cipher dipped his tongue against the same place, and then nipped slightly with a grunt, noting the sensitivity. 

Die let out a soft whimper as Kyo started to try to push in all of his fingers, his own hands grasping at Hiroshi, his eyes wide, mouth open, panting slightly. Some small part of him started to panic, his heart beating frantically, his mind asking him how he was supposed to do this... why he was doing it. But another part began to let him know that it was almost euphoric in a sense, his nerve endings on fire. He huffed out a breath and then closed his eyes, shivering slightly. He could feel everything inside of his passage spasming slightly, and he grew slightly paranoid for a moment, whining, pawing at the blonde under him in an almost frantic sort of manner.

Kyo paused his movements, letting Die adjust around the girth of his fist. Cipher's tongue drew another moan from him, and he tilted his head back, enjoying the sensation. 

Hiroshi couldn't exactly see all that was going on behind Die, but knew the moment Kyo had his fist inside him. He was quick to react to Die's panic, grasping his hand and squeezing it tightly. "Shh, Die...you're alright. Take a deep breath, and just feel..."

Die took in a shuddering breath and then slowly released it, repeating the process until he was breathing semi-normally again, thankful that Hiroshi was actually paying attention to his state. Once his body had finally paid attention and relaxed, he sort of half-collapsed on the older vocalist, closing his eyes.

Hiroshi stroked over Die's back, providing him with comforting touches rather than attempting anything arousing. 

Kyo waited as long as he could before he had to move again to avoid a cramp in his hand. He gently rocked his hand back and forth, his knuckles grazing over Die's prostate. "Are you okay, baby?"

Die lay there, panting, a sort of half-glazed look on his face. And then Kyo started moving his hand, gently brushing his knuckles over Die's prostate, and stars burst in front of Die's eyes, his world lighting on fire in half a second. With a sharp cry, he strained for about half a second, and then he was cumming, despite his cock only being half hard, losing it all over the pillows he'd so diligently piled up under himself.

Cipher watched the proceedings, his eyes flicking between Kyo and Die, then up to Hiroshi's face, smirking a bit at the knowing look on the other's face. His eyes drifted back to Kyo and then to what Kyo's hand was doing, still utterly amazed when someone's hand could fit inside another person's body like that.

When Die started to cum, Cipher let out a soft groan, reaching for the lube and quickly lubing up his latex-covered length, putting a fair share of it on Kyo's cock as well, jacking him off longer than was even remotely necessary.

Kyo could only watch in amazement as Die began to cum. He gasped lowly as the other's body clenched impossibly tight around his hand, nearly making it go numb. "Ah, Die...I can feel…everything inside you quivering." He bit his lip and groaned, getting louder when Cipher's slick hand wrapped around him. He took a moment to buck into the touch then carefully, slowly eased his hand from Die's body. He checked quickly for signs of blood or injury then used a towel and some water to cleanse his hand before glancing at Cipher. "What would be the best way for this? I was thinking he could ride me, and you come in from behind..." 

Hiroshi held tight to Die as the guitarist came, petting his hair and smirking up at his lover, knowing exactly how Die was feeling. He was fully hard just from watching and thinking about it and was anxious for things to get rolling again. "It's really up to Die...

Cipher nodded in agreement to what Hiroshi had stated, relenting on Kyo's cock, nipping his neck one more time. He shifted to lightly pet Die's cheek, peering down into the guitarist's pleasured face. "Hey... you with us, buddy?"

Die let out a low moan of affirmation, looking like he was floating around somewhere on cloud nine.

"Mmm... okay, how do you want this to go? Or do you even still want it?"

Die looked slightly alarmed at the idea of not wanting it, trying to move and failing miserably, just plopping back down on the pillow pile. "I wa-nngg," he trailed off, groaning as he bucked slightly against 

Kyo shivered then moved, going to lean down and press his lips to Die's cheek. "Baby, you need to take a break? I want you to actually be aware of this happening..." 

Hiroshi chuckled softly and carefully pushed Die upright, sliding his hand over the younger's chest, plucking at his nipples. "Perhaps a bottle of water or something?"

Die sort of lolled there, rolling his head between the various people talking and touching him. "I..." he trailed off for a good while and then mumbled out, "came..." a few more seconds and then, in a rush, "so hard."

Kyo stared at his lover and let out a soft laugh, shaking his head. "Yes you did, baby..." He glanced at Hiroshi and nodded. "I think water would be good..." 

Hiroshi snorted and stood up, exiting the bedroom completely nude. He acquired four bottles of water then returned, pressing one into Die's hand before handing the other two theirs.

Cipher settled down against the headboard, tugging Die into his lap and holding the guitarist there, stroking his red hair for the duration of the time that Hiroshi was gone. When he returned, he accepted his water bottle after ensuring Die was capable of hanging onto his own, smirking a bit as the guitarist fumbled and then got it open and took a few sips, still looking mostly dazed. "Kyo... might want to get a larger toy in him, or he may sort of... tighten back up."

Kyo took a large swig of his water and nodded, grabbing their largest toy and lubing it up. He carefully slid it into Die's body then settled back, stroking Die's thigh and then brushing over his length lightly. "I know you said you still want this, but don't force yourself, Die..."

Die rolled his head over to the side and frowned a little at Kyo, reaching one hand to him. "But... I want to," he whispered out. "Just... feels... so good."

Cipher chose then to speak up, reaching to lightly brush his fingers over Die's lips and then over Kyo's. "It's really intense... have you ever had someone fist you before?" he asked softly.

Kyo threaded his fingers with Die's, squeezing tightly. At Cipher's question, he shook his head. "It's been on my list…but hasn't happened yet..." He licked the elder guitarist's fingers then looked at Die. "Should we continue?" 

Hiroshi leaned over and nuzzled against Die's neck while the other two were talking. "Try taking a deep breath, Die...bring your mind back into focus."  
Cipher smirked at Kyo sucking on his fingers. "It's sort of mind-blowing... more intense than usual, and more exhausting to orgasm when your body is so full. It's like... the best drugs in the world... without the drugs."

Die grunted in slight agreement, following Hiroshi's advice, finally shifting himself and reaching to pull the toy out, mounting himself on Cipher's cock, causing the elder guitarist to moan at the abruptness of it. 

Cipher grasped Die's behind and then slid down the bed so that he was on his back, smirking slightly. "Guess he decided the position for us, hmm?"

Die lay there against Cipher's chest, nodding a little. "Kyo wanted to be fucked..." he let out a little laugh, "by Kyo while he fucked me."

Kyo hummed at Cipher's explanation then blinked as Die suddenly mounted Cipher. He groaned softly, moving between Cipher's legs and behind Die. 

Hiroshi was quick to remove the water bottles from the bed then grinned, grabbing a condom for himself and rolling it on. "I have no problem with that." 

Kyo's hands slid over Die's back then down to his ass, pulling him up the slightest bit to see Cipher's cock buried deep inside. A moan slipped past his lips as he grasped his own cock and began pushing it against Die's hole. He gasped when it slid along Cipher's and into Die's body after a little pushing, the feeling insanely tight. "Oh...Gods..."

Die cried out the moment that Kyo’s length slid deep inside him. He shuddered, gasping and then burying his face against Cipher's chest as he moaned again, louder, rolling his head from side-to-side. "Oh my god... oh my god... oh yes."

Cipher stroked over Die's hair, just remaining still. He smirked a bit at Kyo. I'm going to let you do most of the moving, Kyo. It'll be easier for you than for me."

Kyo nodded then reached down to grab Die's hips, slowly beginning to push forward into him, rocking slowly, moaning with each movement. 

Hiroshi watched the goings on with a big grin, occasionally reaching down to stroke over his cock. After a bit, he moved behind Kyo and added lube to his cock before pushing the younger vocalist forward, pancaking him against Die's back while he slid into his body. He began thrusting, and soon Kyo had picked up a good rhythm between pushing into Die and pushing back against Hiroshi.

Die lay there against Cipher, his fingers grabbing onto the blankets beneath them, his eyes wide with the amount of feelings coursing through him. He didn't talk, didn't even moan, just clung to Cipher and the bed, feeling every bit of it, that same cloud-nine look glossing over his features.

Cipher took up his role, slightly tilting his hips every now and then, but mostly just stroking over Die's face, neck, and arms, reassuring the guitarist non-verbally.

Hiroshi rested one hand on Kyo's shoulder as he pushed into him, effectively pushing him forward into Die's body. Kyo was in his own state of bliss of feeling Cipher's cock against his own engulfed in Die's hot body as Hiroshi thrusted into him. It was an amazing feeling.

Die's cock slowly swelled against Cipher's stomach, hardening completely in a matter of a few minutes. Floundering for a moment, he finally reached back to get Kyo's hand, drawing it down over his hip in an attempt to ask for what he wanted. He did the same with Cipher's hand, and then managed to push himself upright enough to allow them both access to him.

Cipher smirked, watching Die do his level best to get what he wanted from them. It was endearing and arousing all at once. He slid his hand over Kyo's, lightly playing with his fingers for a moment.

When Die grabbed his hand, Kyo had a moment of panic that he was going to ask them to stop but then he felt Cipher toying with his fingers and smirked. He linked fingers with Cipher then wrapped their hands around Die's cock, stroking him. His movements slowly grew erratic as he got closer to cumming, and soon he was thrusting hard into Die's body, moaning. 

Hiroshi kept up with Kyo's pace, his free hand going to rest on Cipher's leg as he leaned in to bite and lick the back of Kyo's neck.

It didn't take long before Cipher was arching up as much as he could, his hand stilling around Die's cock as he lost it, a low moan slipping free of his throat as he began to cum, pulsing out his offering into the condom separating him from Die and Kyo. As the last few spurts released, he squeezed Die's cock and Kyo's hand. "Do you feel it?" he hissed out.

Kyo groaned at Hiroshi's attention to his neck then he slowed down as he felt Cipher's cock twitching against his own. He focused on doing slow thrusts, loving the way it felt having Cipher cum right against his cock, despite the barrier. "Oh Gods...yes."

Die whimpered, his hips jerking a few times of their own accord, squirming a bit to get a good angle. "Do it," he hissed out to Kyo, "cum... cum and fill me."

Kyo shifted forward somewhat then grabbed Die's hips, holding him as he pushed into his body hard a few more times before he was crying out. His cock throbbed as he spilled his release deep inside Die and all over Cipher's cock, his body clenching around Hiroshi. 

Hiroshi didn't have to try much harder to follow Kyo over the edge, the intensity of the moment providing him with enough stimulation to bring his orgasm on quickly. Another push into Kyo, and he, too, was flying off the edge with a low moan.

Die stayed where he was, whimpering somewhat pitifully, his own cock achingly hard, filled to the brim, and something else a bit urgent as well making itself known. He waited a few moments for everyone to at least enjoy their orgasms and then murmured, "Please... I need up."

Hiroshi was the first to move, going to collapse next to Cipher with a huff of breath before looking up at Die's face. "You okay, Die?" 

Kyo was reluctant to pull out but finally did, stroking Die's back lightly as he watched his cum drip out of Die's body and down the length of Cipher's cock. "Mm, what's the matter, babe? Something hurting?"

Die huffed out a little breath when Kyo moved, managing to get himself off of Cipher and off the bed, only to take two wobbly steps and collapse in the floor, looking a bit shocked. 

Cipher rolled himself off the bed and moved toward Die, reaching down to slowly help the guitarist back up. "Where are you going? You're too overstimulated to be moving around right now."

Die gave him a pained look and then whimpered, casting Kyo a look that pleaded with him to understand.

Kyo's eyes grew wide when Die moved off the bed then promptly collapsed. He quickly made his way over to Die then noted the look on his face, his mouth forming an "oh". Pursing his lips, he glanced at Cipher and sighed softly. "Help me get him to the toilet...too much wine and water..." He hoped that was an okay explanation for Die's issue.

Cipher looked completely concerned with what was wrong with Die, stroking his side and propping him up until Kyo came over. At the explanation, he nodded and then helped Kyo get Die out of the room and to the bathroom. 

Die looked grateful the moment the bathroom was within range.

Kyo helped guide Die into the bathroom then over to the toilet, glancing from him to Cipher and back, unsure on whether he should ask the guitarist to leave or to continue standing there as support. "Er...Die...?"

Die sort of managed to get ahold of the toilet seat, pushing the lid up, but not the seat itself. He grabbed the edge of the counter and sort of managed to get himself turned around and seated, waving them off.

Kyo blinked then gave Cipher a bit of an embarrassed look before turning and quickly exiting. 

Cipher followed Kyo out, leaning against the wall beside the bathroom and closing his eyes. "Hnn... god that was amazing."

Inside, Die sat there, feeling slightly dazed as he finished taking a piss. Once he was done, he called out, "Uh... little help? My legs are... still dead."

Kyo all but leaned on Cipher, humming. "It really, really was. Between me and you, I am already thinking that I would love for this to happen again..." He laughed then heard Die call. Opening the door, he peeked inside then moved over to get Die up before waiting on Cipher to come in and assist as well.

Meanwhile, Hiroshi had darted downstairs and retrieved the sushi and wine from the fridge as well as glasses for everyone. He made his way back upstairs and settled on the bed, waiting for the three of them to return.

Cipher came in behind Kyo, chuckling a bit and then helping Kyo get Die up. He reached to flush the toilet for him and then slid his arm around Die's waist. "So, Die... how have you liked tonight?"

Die chuckled softly. "Mmm... I've enjoyed it a lot," he murmured softly.

Cipher winked at Kyo and then smirked. "Mmm... I think we could probably arrange it to happen again if you guys are up for it."

Kyo rubbed Die's back then helped lead him back to the bedroom, nodding his head. "If all parties are in agreement, I am, as well." They reached the guest room, and he gave Hiroshi a grateful smile for having brought their snacks up. After getting Die settled on the bed, he made himself comfortable between Die and Hiroshi. 

Hiroshi grinned at the three of them then started passing out drinks and the tray of sushi, settling back and reaching over to give his own lover a rub. "How's everyone doing?"

Cipher crawled into bed next to Hiroshi and settled down, leaning slightly against him. "So... Die didn't get off the last time... you still horny?"

Die blushed a bit and then slid his hand down, touching himself for a few moments before he just closed his eyes and leaned against the headboard. "I want to save this one for Kyo... when we're alone."

Hiroshi turned to press his lips to Cipher's shoulder then chuckled. "I was the very same way the first time...." He selected a piece of sushi and popped it into his mouth, chewing it with a smile. The singer was thoroughly satisfied with how the evening had gone. 

Kyo smiled at Die, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze. "I was wondering why you weren't rabidly humping one of us..." He sipped his wine then looked to the older couple. "As I said, this has been…fantastic...thank you."

Die chuckled a bit and then shrugged. "Mmm... saving it for you, baby. All rabid humps go to Kyo-ville now."

Cipher let out a laugh and stole a piece of sushi right out from under Hiroshi's hand, popping it into his mouth.

Kyo snorted and shook his head, reaching to grab an avocado roll for Die and pushing it between his lips. "Then you better start rebuilding your strength..." 

Hiroshi was about to eat a delectable piece of salmon sashimi when it was snatched right out from under his hand. He turned and looked at Cipher and huffed. "Oi, Ichiro...that was the last one!"

Die looked a bit shocked at the idea of having food shoved at him and then accepted it, chuckling softly while chewing it.

Cipher stuck out his tongue. "Tough... come kiss me for a taste of it then, fucker."

Kyo look satisfied as Die chewed the bite then went for another himself, laughing at Cipher and Hiroshi's "spat". 

Hiroshi huffed and reached out, tangling his hand in Cipher's hair roughly, tugging him forward and kissing him hard.

Cipher groaned softly, kissing the other and then chuckling as he pulled back. "Mmm..."

Hiroshi just smirked and settled against Cipher, sipping his wine slowly. "Brat."

Kyo moved to set his own glass down and laid back with his head pillowed on Die's lap, covering a yawn with his hand. "Hnn.."

Cipher slowly pushed himself up off the bed and smiled at the pair. "As per our rules... we'll be leaving now." He moved around the room and picked up his stuff from the floor, glancing around at the others and smiling softly.

Hiroshi watched as Cipher got up then nodded, moving to stand as well. He got his clothing on fairly quickly then grinned at the pair on the bed. "Thank you for a lovely evening, gentlemen." 

Kyo sat back up as Cipher and Hiroshi began dressing. He bowed his head then smiled. "Thank you, as well..."

Die sniffed a bit and then licked his lips, managing to push himself to his feet and go to hug both Cipher and Hiroshi goodbye. "It's been wonderful. Have a lovely evening."

Cipher hugged Die back, chuckling softly. "Save your energy for Kyo, Die." He scrubbed his hair and then headed off. Hiroshi patted Die's back then left with Cipher after another wave, a grin on his face.

Once they had departed, Kyo stood and moved to slip his arms around Die's waist, pulling him close and pressing his lips against the back of his shoulder. "How about a nice bath, love?"

Die nodded, smiling softly at him. "I'd love to go get a bath," he murmured softly.

Kyo smiled and gently pushed Die forward to get him walking, ignoring the mess in the bedroom for now. He eventually moved to lead the way to the bathroom, going to the tub and turning the faucet on, getting it warmed up. Once it started steaming, he put the plug in and added chamomile and lavender bath salts. After it was finished filling, he stepped in and settled down in the warm water with a sigh. "Oh man, this feels heavenly..."

Die sort of stood around in the bathroom, waiting on Kyo to get the bath done, feeling like if he bent over, he'd probably fall over. Once the bath was drawn, he pulled himself into the tub and settled down with a sigh.

As soon as Die was in the tub, Kyo pulled him into his lap and wrapped his arms around him, rubbing his stomach and sides. "You doing okay baby?"

Die leaned against Kyo, his eyelids fluttering closed as the other began rubbing at him. "Mmm... I'm just fine, love. You?"

Kyo nuzzled and kissed at Die's neck. "Perfect..." He eventually dipped his hand down, brushing over Die's length, stroking over him lightly in the water.

Die groaned faintly, pushing up into Kyo's touch, his eyelids fluttering. "Hnng.... your hand feels like home," he murmured.

Kyo smiled and leaned back a bit, running one hand up over Die's chest, the other still lightly rubbing his length. "I was just thinking the same about you..."

"That my dick does?" Die smirked a bit.

Kyo laughed softly then pulled his hands away to shift Die in his lap so that he could look at him. He cupped his chin lightly and shook his head. "No, having your body against mine..."

Die grinned down at Kyo, wrapping himself around the other and humming softly. "Mmm... I adore you, love."

Kyo slid his arms around Die and held him tight, pushing his face against his neck. "I love you, Koi."

"I love you more than anything." Die nuzzled into Kyo's arms and closed his eyes. "I feel safe here."

Kyo pressed his lips to Die's skin over and over, feeling a rush of emotion sweep over him. "You are and always will be."

Die lightly nipped at the skin of Kyo's shoulder, licking over it soothingly as the other spoke. He wanted to make a comment about earlier, but he remembered the rules and completely pushed it back out of his mind, concentrating only on Kyo.

Kyo sighed lightly, nuzzling against Die as he stroked his hands over his lover's skin, finally resting them on his hips, his thumbs making small circles there.

Die hummed softly, resting his head on Kyo's shoulder and closing his eyes as he ran his hands up and down Kyo's back, lightly massaging him in the process. "We should take more baths, baby."

Kyo closed his eyes and relaxed into Die's touch, smiling. "Mm, we really should. It's so nice to be close to you in the warm water like this." He turned his head and pressed his lips to Die's shoulder. "Seriously though, how is everything feeling? No pain inside?"

Die debated it for a moment and then chewed his lower lip a bit. "I'm sore, but I don't feel like anything is actually like... broken or something." He shrugged and then closed his eyes. "I... um... how long have you wanted to do that to me?"

Kyo hummed, satisfied with that answer. He knew Die would be sore, but so long as there wasn't anything severe going on, all would be okay. At his lover's question, he let out a soft laugh. "I've thought about it off and on for a while now. It's also something I've thought I'd like to have done...purely because I'm masochistic."

Die shivered slightly. "Mmm... I'd love to try it sometime with you. You think you can show me how on like... a toy or something?"

Kyo pulled back slightly to look in Die's face, grinning. "Mm, yeah, definitely." He reached up and cupped Die's cheek, pulling him forward for a deep kiss. Despite everything that had occurred less than an hour ago, he found himself desperate for intimacy with his lover, needing to reaffirm that bond.

Die was about to say something else when his lover pulled him in for a very lovely, searching type of kiss. He grunted softly and then began kissing his lover back, his tongue slicking out and delving into Kyo's mouth, tasting him in the most intimate of ways.

Kyo let out a soft moan, parting his lips for Die, curling his tongue around the one in his mouth. He drew Die closer, hands sliding over his body in the water then sliding up to tangle wetly in his hair.

Die groaned softly, arching toward Kyo's touches, his own hands wandering his lover's body, sliding down between them and grasping his cock, stroking him into full hardness as he continued kissing him, not giving him the option to get out of it in any manner.

The vocalist hadn't really been expecting it so when Die's hand wrapped around his cock, he let out a loud moan against the other's lips. Seeking to give Die pleasure as well, he slipping his hand down to stroke over Die's length, loving the way it felt as it grew in his hand.

Die's hips bucked into his lover's hand, kissing Kyo hard as he worked him. After a few more minutes of that, he finally pulled back from the kiss and reached to steady himself on Kyo's shoulder, shifting himself and then slowly lowering himself down onto Kyo's cock with a slight wince. "Just... be gentle," he murmured.

Kyo didn't realize what Die was doing until it was too late to stop him. He groaned and reached out to grasp Die's hips, steadying him. "A-ah...Die..." Biting his lip, he looked into his lover's eyes as he gently pushed upward, Die's body noticeably looser than usual but not so much so that it didn't feel good. "Gods baby..."

Die leaned his head against Kyo's shoulder and then licked his lips, his breath hitching slightly as Kyo began moving. He licked lightly at Kyo's shoulder and then shifted closer to him, making it so that Kyo couldn't possibly move more than a few inches.

Kyo let out a soft sigh of pleasure then wrapped his arms around Die, pushing up just barely, rocking more than anything. He turned his head and pressed his lips to Die's ear, nipping the lobe lightly.  
"Lay claim to me," Die breathed out, "make me yours again... only yours."

A shudder went through Kyo at Die's words, and he bent his head, biting into Die's neck, putting a physical mark there for the world to see, not caring in the least. As he did that, he rocked his hips a bit harder, building towards his end. "Daisuke...my Daisuke…"

Die moaned softly as Kyo bit him. His hips canted slightly, unable to stop it despite the ache from what they were doing. One thing was for sure, he wasn't going to need to be fucked for a while after this... or rather his body probably wouldn't be able to take it.

Kyo reached between them, wrapping his hand around Die's length and stroking him as he bucking his hips up into his abused body. He tilted back slightly, putting himself at a better angle. Die's hips jerked as Kyo continued stroking him off. Bowing his head, he groaned as he started to help Kyo move, whimpering quietly.

Kyo titled his head back and closed his eyes, groaning lowly when Die started moving too. He was slowly nearing orgasm so he tightened his hand around Die's length, intent on getting his lover off first. Die desperately wanted to give Kyo what he was wanting, but his body felt like it was entirely possible he might not manage another orgasm out of tonight. Whimpering softly, he held onto Kyo tighter. "Fill me, baby... claim me."

Sensing Die's slight distress, Kyo eased off a bit on stroking him and instead focused on pushing into his body. It wasn't another minute before he let out a soft gasp, and he was cumming, managing at least one spurt into Die's body, the rest simply pulsing out from the tip of his dick. "A-ah...Die...yes!"

Die rocked against him as he came, letting out a quiet groan. Once he was sure Kyo had cum, he relaxed, just sitting quietly in Kyo's lap. After a few moments, he murmured, "I'm sorry I don't think I have anything left to uh... give."

Kyo shuddered slightly then looked at Die, biting his lip before nodding, pulling his hand away from his lover's cock. "It's okay, baby. As long as you're satisfied."

Die let out a soft chuckle, nuzzling his nose against Kyo's neck. "Very much so, my love."

Kyo hummed and stayed still for a few moments before gently pulling out of Die with a groan. He shifted a bit then pulled Die into his arms, holding him tight against his chest. "I love you, Koi."

"I love you, too... and nothing in this world will ever change that. Ever."

Kyo felt emotion well up inside him, and he held Die tighter, closing his eyes as he pressed his face to his lover's neck. He'd honestly never felt so sure of their love than he did tonight.

Die nuzzled against him, reaching to rub Kyo's sides ever so gently. "We should probably shower off before we prune."

Kyo hummed and nodded, reaching forward to unplug the tub. Once it had drained a good bit, he stood up and scooped Die up bridal style, stepping out of the tub and over to their shower. He settled Die on the pull out seat then turned the shower on to fairly hot, going about washing himself quickly before taking care of Die as well, being very gently on his backside.

Die gasped when Kyo scooped him up, clinging to him, a huge grin on his face. "Holy... wow!" he breathed out, always sort of forgetting that Kyo had the strength necessary to do such things on whim.

Kyo grinned widely at Die, loving that he could still shock him that way. Once he was done cleaning them up, he took a moment to just let the water wash over them. "I think I'll sleep for the next week..."

Die chuckled softly. "Yeah... I can't say I'm going to have issues sleeping tonight, that is for sure."

Kyo grinned then finally shut the water off and stepped out to get towels. He took care of himself quickly then wrapped his around his waist. Grabbing the second towel, he stepped in and dried off Die's top half, then his legs before finally pulling him to his feet to get the rest. "Think you can walk?"

Die let Kyo treat him to it all, so happy with the whole thing. It was definitely a change of pace from their usual. He stood up when Kyo urged him to and then chuckled when Kyo asked if he could walk. "Yeah... but it was way more fun having you carry me, I'll admit to that."

Kyo laughed softly and simply scooped Die up again, carrying his lover to their bedroom. There, he rid them both of their towels before settling on the bed with Die still in his arms. "You're beautiful, you know that?"

Die gleefully held onto Kyo as the other picked him up, a smirk on his face that clearly told his pleasure of the moment. Settling down on the bed, he pushed the covers out of the way and then snuggled down.

"Thank you, love," he murmured out in response to Kyo's comment.

Kyo released Die long enough to get under the blankets himself before attaching himself to Die's side, octopus style. "Mmm, so comfortable now..."

Die rolled over to face Kyo, tugging the other into his arms and snuggling him close. "You're perfect," he murmured softly.

Kyo grinned at Die, leaning in to kiss him softly. "Mm, I'm not, but thank you." He chuckled and pulled back to look into Die's eyes. "I love you, Koi. So very much."

"And I love you, with all my heart."


	52. Chapter 52

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

It was nearly five thirty, and Die was, not for the first time in his life, late. And rather upset to boot. He had an interview starting at five thirty, and traffic was being a pain in his ass. Three accidents that happened nearly on top of him had given his hour and a half leeway all the run for its money it could possibly have. Huffing, he drummed his fingers on the wheel, maneuvering between the wreck and the police who were milling around rather than moving the wreck out of the road.

As soon as he was out of the mess, he made fast work getting where he was going, parking in the guest parking, glad they enforced it here as much as anywhere else, and darted up the stairs into the building. Three floors up, five doors down, and he burst in one minute until curtain time. "Sorry, oh my god I'm sorry! Three wrecks! I'm so sorry!"

The makeup crew surrounded him and did a record job of getting his hair and makeup in order, straightening his shirt, and then nearly shoving him into his seat.

Die composed himself just as the countdown to air came. Something boiled in the pit of Die's stomach, making him uncomfortable with the whole thing. He never went on interviews without knowing the questions, but this time he was flying completely blind on the whole ordeal.

He waited as the host talked about a few things and then finally, introduced him. He waved to the camera and the audience he knew was watching this roll live on the other end of the technological wonder that was TV. The younger man Die knew from watching this show before launched into the questions almost instantly.

First he asked about any new recordings, Die giving the requisite answer from management. This was the sort of shit he always hated, feeling it gave nothing of his personality to the viewers. But he supposed that it was also sort of requisite in the industry. They talked a bit about Kyo's health, how his voice was healing and how Die had felt during the time he was down for the count. Again, Die shuffled off the management-required answers, feeling slightly sour about having to say he'd never worried a single moment. It sounded arrogant and asshole-ish at best.

They moved on to commercial break, and Die was refreshed of his makeup and whatnot, the girls flitting away at the last possible second before they came back on. The hostess asked a few questions on fashion and foods Die liked to eat before the host went back to asking his own questions.

Just when Die was growing impatient with the usual questions, he was asked a question he honestly hadn't been in years.

"So, Die, rumor holds it you have a special someone in your life. What do you have to say about this?"

Die sat there for a moment, his lips parted, fear gripping his stomach. He knew what answer he needed to give, but he also knew what answer he wanted to supply. Lying about Kyo was one of his biggest issues, something he couldn't possibly deal with having to do. After a moment, he forced a chuckle and then shrugged, "Rumors are always just that, right? Rumors. Some have truth and some don't."

The hostess took up talking about some rumors surrounding one of the female idols and how she'd gone and gotten a boyfriend, and it had turned into a huge scandal with her label. But as soon as she was done talking, the host went right back to Die again. "So seriously, here's some of the rumors." He tapped his paper with his finger. "I saw Die the other afternoon with two women going toward a love hotel in my neighborhood." He laughed. "Scandalous, Die! But expected, right? I mean a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do!"

Die clenched his jaw, a certain amount of anger radiating out from him despite how much he tried to rein it in. He knew for a fact that Kyo was watching and if nothing else, this would probably amount to a fight between them over if Die had done it or not. Not that he blamed Kyo for it... after all, he'd be pretty peeved if someone said Kyo was fucking around behind his back, too, and he'd probably confront him about it. And confrontations never ended well.

After a moment, he leaned forward, clutching his hands between his knees, and shook his head. "People will say anything they want. On the other hand, somewhere out there, there's bound to be someone with my taste in clothing and my haircut, right? But, no, I don't do that sort of thing."

"That's not the only rumor! This one dispelled by the man himself, but what's this one? It's an even larger scandal than the last!" The man looked positively gleeful. "Die, the guitarist of Dir en grey, seen going into a celebrity hot spot with none other than Kyo, the band's vocalist, on his arm! Are they dating? Was it a one-time fuck? Or maybe they're co-dating a woman behind the scenes!" He flicked his gaze up to Die. "So what say you on this subject?"

Die almost couldn't mask the fear in his eyes, having to bow his head and collect himself. He had to deny... management would have his and Kyo's head if he didn't. But the pain in his heart told him lying was betraying and that saying he wasn't dating Kyo when he was... well that was rather like shunning his lover. After a moment, he finally quietly let out, "I'd really rather not be addressing such questions. I apologize, but it really does make me quite uncomfortable."

The hostess attempted to launch into another subject, but the host cut her off, holding up a hand and staring right at Die. "With how you're acting, I'd say someone just hit the nail on the head, and you actually are doing one of those two things."

Die raised his head, anger written across his face. "I asked nicely if you'd please drop the subject. I'm asking again. My personal life is my personal life, and people will make things up however they wish just to get a rise. Well... you got a rise. Are you happy with that?"

The host gave him a smug look and turned to the camera, starting in on how it was seen here first, but Die refused to pay any further attention to him. When the commercial break cut, Die stood up. He looked toward the hostess and murmured, "I am truly sorry, but I am going to leave now." With that, he walked past the both of them.

The host reached out, grasping his sleeve, and Die reacted in an instant, turning around and nearly punching him. He pulled back at the last second and shoved the man's hand off his sleeve. "Don't ever touch someone without their permission. It's rude." Turning away, he walked right back out the door, down the stairs, and got into his car, pulling out and driving away.

By the time he was a few blocks down, he was shaking he was so upset, absolutely convinced Kyo was going to be livid with him and management was going to kill him for what he'd just done and said. Pulling off the main roads, he headed toward their home rather than back to the studio, knowing it was closer and he was more likely to have a few minutes to sort out what to say when everything came crashing down around his ears. After all, with Kyo at work, it was going to take him at least half an hour to get home if he even realized that was where Die was going.

Though Kyo had been in the studio all day, he insisted on taking a break when it came time for Die's live interview on some talk show or another. He had gotten himself some tea and settled on their break room couch with it, flicking the TV on just in time to see Die there on the screen. He smiled a bit as they introduced him and his lover's grin flashed for the cameras. 

The interview got underway and Kyo found himself sighing as it ended up being the same stale crap as always. Sometimes, he really wished they'd go off road with these things. However, Die took it like a champ, answering the questions and still managing to not look pissy or bored. 

The show went to commercial and Kyo ran to the bathroom, coming back just in time to hear the topic turn to rumors. His stomach wiggled uncomfortable but he kept an open mind, knowing that these things followed celebrities around. He chuckled softly at the way Die played them off then leaned forward a bit at the actual rumor, his eyebrow raised. Die's answer didn't exactly suit him as it wasn't an instant flat out denial but he supposed his lover was being diplomatic or something. Besides, the look on Die's face was one of great discomfort and that alone let Kyo know that he was unhappy with this subject. 

The next rumor had Kyo's jaw clenching. When the hell did they go anywhere they could have been seen? "Fuck..." he uttered to the empty, scooting the edge of his seat, his knee bouncing as he awaited Die's response. Would Die deny their relationship? Were they ready to tell the world? They'd only ever discussed it briefly and never with any seriousness.

Die looked rather like he was going to vomit and when he did answer, Kyo let out a sigh, his heart aching at the thought that Die had to sweep them under the rug. He knew management would flip shit if he didn't, but it didn't stop it from hurting. 

The host persisted after Die requested him to stop, and Kyo could see his lover's face turning red with anger. His own face was a mask of hurt and annoyance that this had even become an issue, and he found his hands clenched tightly. Die got flat out rude on camera and after the commercial break, he wasn't there anymore, meaning he'd walked off. That was something Die never did. 

Kyo sat there for a moment, seething. He didn't know whether to be pissed at Die or the host or management but after a few minutes, he stood, heading out. Kaoru met him in the hall but he didn't even give the guitarist a chance to speak, instead just waving his hand and stalking off for the doors. He had to get home. He and Die had to talk, and he knew his lover would be there instead of heading back to the studio. He got to his car, thankful they'd drove separately that day and headed for their house, his hands shaking by then.

By the time Die got home, he felt like he was going to throw up, his stomach boiling something awful. He shoved inside and made his way into the downstairs bathroom, knowing only guests ever used it and they kept it closed. Anything he did in here wouldn't have any repercussions with Kyo just so long as he didn't make it obvious.

Slipping into the bathroom, he sank to his knees in front of the toilet, staring down into the water with a sullen look. He slid a hair tie from his pocket and tied his hair back in a ponytail, leaning forward and closing his eyes. He knew this better than anything, an old enemy of sorts, really. And for the time being, he just needed to not be feeling ill by the time Kyo came home. And he would... there was no way he wouldn't.

Clenching his muscles in all the right ways, he leaned further forward and retched a few times, finally getting his body to cooperate. For the next few minutes, Die proceeded to empty the contents of his stomach into the toilet, finally finishing and spitting a few times before he flushed and then wiped up everything as a precaution. He used the guest mouthwash to rinse his mouth a few times, finger brushing his teeth, and then finally sprayed some air freshener.

Slipping back out into the living room, he shut the door to the bathroom, leaving it like it usually was, and then headed to the kitchen, pouring himself a rather large glass of Jack. Two large swallows later, and he leaned on the counter, taking his hair down and stuffing the band back in his pocket, efficiently erasing the rest of the evidence of what had happened. What was he going to tell Kyo? How was this going to go down? And really, how much trouble was he in with management now that he'd walked out of an interview. It made the band look bad... made him look bad... and really, most importantly to management, it made management look bad.

Kyo arrived home about twenty minutes after Die, parking beside the other and getting out, heading inside. He braced himself for the storm to come and stepped into the kitchen, his arms crossed. "Daisuke. What the hell?"

To say the least, Die hadn't been expecting the first words that came out of Kyo's mouth when he stepped inside. He stared at him for a few moments before slamming back the rest of the glass he'd poured himself and settling the glass on the countertop. Pursing his lips, he looked away, and shook his head. "I got mad."

Kyo stared at the glass in Die's hand before stepping further into the kitchen and settling against the counter. "Really? I didn't notice...except for the fact that you walked off an interview." He pursed his lips and sighed. "And for that matter...two girls at a love hotel? Rumors of us together? The fuck?"

Die's jaw clenched when Kyo brought up the rumors of him at a love hotel with two girls. He crossed his arms over his chest defensively. "You know damn well I haven't been at any love hotels with any girls. People are hateful and rude, and they'll say whatever they need to say to ruin someone."

Kyo waved his hand. "That doesn't matter. What I wanna know is who you've pissed off lately? And…who the hell could have seen us doing anything together?" He stood upright, pacing a little. "This is bullshit. Management is going to have your and probably MY head for this."

Die closed his mouth and just looked wounded as he stood there. Who had he pissed off? Why only him? Aside from that, he did his damn best to never piss anyone off... except tonight. Closing his eyes, he tried to will away the agony of being basically accused of being the reason this was all happening. "I'll take the blame," he finally uttered, turning around and pouring himself a new glass of booze.

Kyo stared at the alcohol being poured into the glass then sighed, shaking his head. "They're going to slaughter both of us, whether you take the blame or not." He stepped over and removed the bottle from Die's hand, taking a swig then setting it down. "We didn't need this kind of publicity right now. Just…what the ever loving fuck?" He wasn't questioning Die's involvement now but more along the lines of why now of all times?

Die bowed his head, letting Kyo take the bottle away only if because he didn't need to drink the whole thing on a completely empty stomach. As if on cue to Kyo's comment, his phone began to vibrate in his pocket. With a sigh, he pulled it out and stared down at the familiar number. "Speak of the devil." He slid the bar to answer the phone and put it to his ear, not even getting out a greeting before he was being yelled at by one of the higher ups for having left the set like that. He picked up the glass and downed another large part of it, just leaning on the counter and waiting on the hell-storm of words to be over with.

Kyo capped the bottle and put it away. Die's phone buzzed, and he looked up, frowning at it, hearing the screams for the other side. He scrubbed his hand over his face, sighing. Just when things had started to get better, this shit was raining down on them. 

He moved to sit down at the table, watching Die with a pinched look. His lover's expression on the screen flashed before his eyes, and it felt like a knife in his gut. He could practically see Die crumbling as he denied their relationship. What else were they supposed to do though?

Die waited it out, just listening to management crawl up his ass about it. After a few minutes, he finally murmured, "This is the first time I have ever done something like this. You won't catch it happening ever again. But I have one question for you. Would you rather me have gone about it and told the world that Kyo and I are together or walked out? Because he was pushing, and I wasn't going to take shit." He listened for a few more moments and then simply pulled the phone away from his ear and hit the end call button, ditching the device on the counter top. "Asshole."

Kyo gritted his teeth as he listened to Die talk. He knew some of the higher-ups didn't know about them yet. He guessed they did now. Another sigh left him when Die hung up, and he angrily picked up the Jack, swigging out of the bottle again just for something, anything to do with his hands. "This is fucked up. So goddamned fucked up."

Die downed the remains of his glass of Jack and set up pacing back and forth across the room. "They're going to have my head. I'm going to have to fucking shave my head or something like that girl... publically apologize for having a relationship." He stopped, staring outside. "I'm not going to do it. I won't. I can't."

Kyo shook his head. "No, you're going have to shave your head. We've fucked up before. You have fucked up before. They're just gonna be pissed for a while..." He scratched his arm, a bit harder than needed. "Why didn't you do a pre-interview? Why wasn't there one this time? There usually is."

Die bowed his head, closing his eyes. "I was late. Three accidents on the way and even though I left super early, it didn't matter. I got there like one minute before the start of the show. There wasn't time. So I guess the rat bastard decided to slip in the questions I'd otherwise never have approved."

Kyo huffed and dragged his hand through his hair. "Fucking hell."

Die just nodded a bit and then glanced back at the counter when his phone started to vibrate again. "You misunderstand me..." he murmured quietly, "it's not that I can't and won't shave my head... it's that I can't and won't deny us again."

Kyo bit his lip and moved to Die's side, reaching out to lightly touch his hand. "Die...it's..." He was going to say it wasn't worth it, but he knew Die would take it to mean that they weren't worth it. "Just turn your phone off..." No sooner than he'd said that, he heard his own go off somewhere upstairs. "Fuckers."

Die picked up the phone anyway, knowing the screaming would be worse later. Pressing it to his ear, he murmured, "Daisuke speaking." A few moments of listening and he looked completely surprised and then just bowed his head, closing his eyes and trying not to cry. "Thanks... it means a lot, Nora. Yeah... I'll let him know... have a good night."

He hung up the phone and gave Kyo a watery look. "She says no matter what happens, as long as we need her, she'll move wherever we do."

Kyo watched as Die answered, expecting more screaming but didn't hear any. When Die spoke and mentioned Nora's name, he bit his lip, guilt sweeping over him. This would cause so many people so much trouble if it blew up and it would be their fault. 

After Die had hung up and relayed Nora's message to him, he simply nodded, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. "We owe her...so much."

Die nodded and then sighed as his phone started vibrating again. He answered it without looking, once again muttering out, "Daisuke speaking," and then waiting for a few moments before making a few noises to let the other person know he was listening. After a few moments, he held out the phone to Kyo. "It's Inoue... he knows your here. He's... only a little mad."

Kyo huffed when Die's phone rang again. When Die held the phone out to him, he stared at it wearily before finally taking it. "Kyo." He grunted a few times then hung up, sighing. "He said we should ‘cool it’ for a bit until this blows over...whatever the fuck that means."

Die tilted his head back and shook it slightly. "Nope. Fuck that shit." He took his phone back and tucked it into his pocket. "I'm taking a fucking nap."

Kyo just sighed. "Better get my phone before it blows up." With that, he turned and headed up the stairs before Die, going into their bedroom to get his phone. He looked at the missed calls, one each from Nora and Inoue and then a text from Kaoru. He messaged their leader back, telling him he'd talk to him later then looked at the bed. He wasn't sure if Die wanted to just be alone or what, and so he found himself standing there awkwardly.

Die dragged himself up the stairs, making his way into the bedroom and pulling his shirt over his head, tossing it on the floor. His pants went next, leaving him in his boxers. Collapsing on the bed, he curled up and then murmured, "Are you gonna stand there like a weirdo, or are you gonna lay down?"

Kyo huffed a little then tugged his own clothes off before climbing into the bed with Die, lying beside him.

Die curled up next to Kyo and tucked his face down against his neck, closing his eyes. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry I caused a scene, and I'm sorry I fucked everything up. But I just..." he shook his head, "I can't keep denying us."

Kyo was quick to wrap his arms around Die, shaking his head. "Don't be sorry. That host was a piece of shit. He pulled this bullshit on purpose." He sighed and pressed his face against Die's hair. "I love you, no matter what...and it means a great deal to me that you'd go that far for us."

Die nodded a little and then sighed, doing his best to relax. "Cool it... like, seriously, how the hell are we supposed to do that? We live together."

Kyo snorted, shaking his head. "I don't know. I got the impression that he'd like for us to not be seen together unless with other members. I mean, what the fuck? We're bandmates..." He huffed and rolled over, leaning more against Die.

"It's going to virtually confirm it if I start avoiding you in public, you know... I mean, people aren't stupid. And I just made that scene where everyone and their mother will see it."

Kyo nodded, groaning a little. "Yeah, I mean, I guess we could flipping go out and act like super buddies or some shit." He rolled onto his back. "Ugh! This shit makes my head hurt. That fucking asshole."

Die grunted softly and then sighed. "I don't care. I really don't fucking care." And yet... he did care. More than he was willing to admit.

Kyo hummed and then shifted closer to Die, leaning up to kiss him lightly. "Good. Just...fuck him, yeah?" He settled back down, closing his eyes, trying to relax some.

"Yeah... fuck him," Die muttered, snuggling in closer, pulling the covers up.

Kyo laid there for a long time, staring at the ceiling. There was no way he could possible go to sleep at this point. In fact, the only thing he felt like doing was going beating the shit out of that interviewer. Another sigh left his lips, and he rolled onto his side, peering at Die's face.

Die lay there, his head tucked down, tears slowly making their way down his cheeks as he did his best to pretend he was actually napping.

Kyo didn't know how long he laid there staring at Die's face but after several long moments, Die moved just so, and the light from outside caught the tears on his face. Kyo's lips pressed together in a thin line, and he shifted, pulling Die to him. "Daisuke...baby..."

Die leaned in closer to Kyo, sliding his arms tightly around the other, finally just losing it completely. "I don't wanna lose you," he whispered softly.

Kyo's throat constricted at Die's words and he sighed softly, shaking his head. "Baby, I'm not going anywhere...I swear."

Die let out a quiet sob, tucking his head down against Kyo's chest. "Even if it c-costs us everything else?"

Kyo swallowed hard and nodded his head, holding Die tightly against him. "Yes, because life wouldn't be worth it without you."

Die pressed himself closer to Kyo, clutching him tight as he simply nodded in reply, unable to say anything else in that moment. He felt more upset than he had in a very long time and while he felt reassured by Kyo, he honestly still didn't know what to actually do.

Kyo held Die, pressing kisses to the top of his head. He was truly unaware of how much this was affecting his lover and was under the assumption that Die would be okay the next day or so.


	53. Chapter 53

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

Die sat perched on the edge of the back porch, watching the little black and white rabbit he'd rescued a few days prior as it hopped around the back yard, occasionally coming back to him to nibble at the carrots he'd laid out in front of him. He shifted one flip-flopped foot out of the way, letting the bunny come back over, smiling a bit when the little guy pushed himself up onto his back paws and hovered there, his ears perked up and his nose sniffing a million miles a minute. "You still need a name," he murmured to the little creature. 

With a sigh, he looked out over the patio, pursing his lips slightly. Some things were honestly beyond his control, and he felt like right then, his life was doing a monumental spiral into hell. He'd gone to his brother's house last night and had him chop his hair off super short. Kyo still hadn't seen it, but it was Die's own personal one-man rebellion to the questions he'd been asked, to the lies he'd had to tell. His reasoning had been simple. If that idol girl had had to chop her hair off for dating someone and admitting it, then Die would chop his off as his admission to the world. 

But even that had only settled part of his issues. He felt honestly more upset than was reasonable... and in the week since he'd been confronted, he'd lost his fragile control on his old habits. Even now, watching the rabbit nibble on the edge of a carrot, the mere sight of food made him ache for the release he'd been allowing himself.

Swallowing hard, he leaned forward and reached for the bunny, drawing the fluffy little animal onto his lap, stroking over the most incredibly soft fur he'd ever felt. He knew Kyo wasn't entirely happy he'd taken the little guy in, but he'd been abandoned, and it had been raining... and Die just had a soft heart when it came to any creature suffering. He tweaked one jet black ear and slid his index finger down between the bunny's ears, stroking there, the creature sliding down to lay stretched across Die's lap, perfectly content with the attention.

Kyo had been away for the last several days in Kyoto, dealing with his photography project. Though he and Die had been in contact every night, he'd had a feeling that things weren't right with his lover. The site that greeted him when he stepped out on the back porch after getting home proved his gut feeling correct. Die had shorn off most of his hair and sat hunched over as though he were in pain. Kyo gritted his teeth then cleared his throat, alerting the other of his presence.

Die gasped when he heard the familiar clearing of a throat behind him. He fitted a smile onto his face and gently placed the rabbit down, standing up, brushing his hands off on his shorts and stepping around the carrots to rush to his lover. Sliding his arms around the other's shoulders, he tugged him into his embrace. "Hey baby doll, I've missed you," he purred out, tilting Kyo's chin up with one finger and pressing a light kiss to his lips.

Kyo held back a frown as he saw Die's face. His lover was slightly green looking and perhaps a bit sunken, as if he wasn't eating or feeling well. He pushed it aside as he slipped his arms around Die's waist, pulling him close, hugging him too tightly. "I've missed you, too." He returned the kiss then pulled back, studying Die's face. "Everything been alright?" He reached up to tug one short lock, humming a little. "Are we breaking up or something? You usually only cut your hair during a breakup..."

Die gave Kyo a little half-sad look when he asked if he was alright. But when he asked if they were breaking up, there was a flash of something that could have only been labeled as agony on his face for a moment before he shook his head. "No... it's my admission... my confession to the world. I am with you, and I don't like hiding it or lying about it. Call it a one-man confession, but... here it is."

Kyo's lips pressed together in a thin line at Die's explanation. He'd hoped that this sort of thing would blow over quickly but it seemed as though it had really, truly upset his lover. He, himself, didn't care for hiding their relationship either. He pushed his fingers through Die's hair, testing the short locks then sighing a little. "Now what am I going to hold on to?"

Die slid his hand up to cover Kyo's own, pushing it tight into his hair and curling it into a fist. "This," he breathed out softly, "trust me... it works."

Kyo huffed out a breath but allowed his fingers to be curled into a fist. He gave it an experimental tug then shrugged, figured it wasn't so bad. "Just don't go any short, okay?

The response maybe wasn't entirely what Die had been looking for in that moment, but he supposed he had fairly shocked his lover. Pulling his hand back down, he kissed the palm and then turned away, following the rabbit and going to pick him up, coming back to show him to Kyo. "This is the little guy who was out in the rain just abandoned."

Kyo stared at Die's back, biting back a sigh. He moved to squat beside Die, peering at the rabbit. "Hello, you look like tomorrow's stew."

Die shot Kyo a little glare. "Hey... he's someone's pet... not wild rabbit."

Kyo winced a little then shook his head. "I was just teasing, love." He moved and settled down.

"Better be." Die shifted the bunny and sat down fully, putting him back in his lap. "He likes this," he stroked between the bunny's ears lightly, trying hard to ignore the carrots on the ground in front of him.

For a moment, panic actually filtered through him. Kyo had told him to go shopping, and he had intentionally not done it yet. What if Kyo noticed and... no, he wouldn't. He'd say he hadn't had time and he'd eaten out.

Kyo reached over, running his finger over the rabbit's soft fur. He glanced out over the yard then back to Die. "What did the cats think of their new housemate?"

Die shrugged a little. "Slightly afraid at first, but I think they ended up okay with him in the end. At least he got no issues the past two nights.'

The vocalist hummed then let out a laugh when his stomach gave a loud growl. "I'm starving, what's for supper? I could really go for something home cooked."

Die stared at Kyo for half a second with a shocked look on his face. It was as if the world were slapping him in the face with his own thoughts. With a sigh, he stood up, picking up the bits of carrot left, and headed inside, mumbling under his breath. "Sorta... forgot... groceries."

Kyo blinked at Die's reaction to his statement. It was odd, and he didn't really understand why but he didn't like it. Standing, he followed the redhead inside, moving into the kitchen. "Forgot groceries? What've you been doing then?"

"Eating out," the lie slid from his lips with practiced ease. A habit too old and held onto too long in the past for the hesitation to be where it should have been. "Got busy, sorry..." well at least he was sorry.

Kyo made a face, only slightly annoyed. "Well, I don't feel like going shopping tonight. Is there enough left to make soup with or something?"

Die placed the rabbit down in his box and put the carrots next to him. He moved to the sink and washed his hands, feeling guilt start to trickle down inside him. "I'll go to the store. There's some crackers left in the meantime. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to go."

Kyo waved his hand, grabbing a bottle of water from their rather empty fridge. "Nah, let's just go to the conbini and grab some onigiri or bento or something. It's fine." He offered Die a half smile the moved to slide his arm around his waist, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. "Mm, next time, you have to come with me to Kyoto. I want to photograph you in about a hundred spots there..."

Die relaxed a bit at the idea that the other was actually okay with the fact that he hadn't gotten food for the house. At the comment about Kyoto, he focused on it and brought it to forefront. "I'd love to go with you next time... but I think maybe this time I wasn't meant to go just so that I could find the bunny and save him." He headed toward the front door and then stopped short, staring at their shoes, a forlorn expression on his face. "But... we... we're not allowed to go together."

Kyo had moved to get his jacket, tugging it on then heading back to the front door. When Die stopped and spoke up, Kyo sighed and shook his head. "We're bandmates, Die; we can go wherever the ever living fuck we want to go!"

Die half winced away from Kyo's vehement words, quietly going to get his shoes and pull them on. He slid on one of his old hoodies and zipped it up, tugging the hood up and pushing his hands into his pockets, standing there awkwardly, waiting on Kyo to get his shoes on as well.

Kyo stared at Die after he'd stated his stand on things, waiting on the other to respond in some form. What he didn't expect was the silence and hunched look. He pursed his lips, stepping into sandals. "Wanna drive or walk?"

"Drive," Die murmured softly, all but darting out the door and to the car, opening it and sitting himself in the passenger seat rather than the driver's seat, something of an oddity for him.

"Okay then." He followed Die out, glancing at the car with an odd look before slipping into the driver's seat. "Where to? 7-11 or Lawson?"

Die buckled up and then sat there quietly, contemplating what Kyo's question might be... would he notice what Die had been doing? Would he know just right off the bat?

A few more minutes passed and then he sighed and licked his lips. "So... how was it?"

Kyo started the car and headed for the nearest convenience store. "It was beautiful as always minus the rain and the lack of you being there. I got several new shots though and bought a new lens." He glanced over at his lover then back to the road.

Die nodded. "Rain can be beautiful in its own way... did you get any shots in the rain? I think that would probably thrill more than a few people to see again."

Kyo pulled up into the parking lot of a 7-11, cutting the engine shortly after. "Of course I did. The staff and I went to that one park with all of the ancient trees and took shots there." He slipped out of the car then stood, waiting for Die to join him.

Die slid out of the car behind him, shutting the door and jamming his hands into his pockets as he walked around it. "Cool... hopefully got some good shots."

Kyo hummed and nodded, going to the door and holding it open for Die. Once they were inside, he moved to the food counter, studying the selections, his stomach giving an audible growl.

Die slipped inside, immediately going toward the back of the shop, picking out a bottle of cherry vodka and one of 'cake' flavor, just to see what the hell it tasted like, since some of his friends had been raving about it. He grabbed a box of crackers and came back up toward Kyo, hoping the other had just ordered something so he didn't have to be confronted with the choices.

Kyo finally chose a package of regular fried rice and some spring rolls for them to share. He had just grabbed the packages of food when Die returned and he looked up at him then at what he was carrying, an eyebrow raised. "Dessert?"

Die grunted. "Something like that." He chuckled a bit and then moved to put his purchases on the counter, pulling out his money and waiting on the total from the bored-looking cashier. After a moment, he pointed at a package of ice cream mochi behind the counter. "Those as well. Green tea flavor."

Kyo snorted then settled his stuff on the counter, looking at Die's money then shrugging. At the mention of mochi ice cream, he glance over then nodded his approval. Once they'd paid and their things had been bagged, he gathered them up and headed back out. "So, what did you do while I was away? Have orgies?"

Die arched an eyebrow and shook his head. "Read my fan mail... worked my part in the next mag... a few interviews."

Kyo chuckled. "Sounds exciting. You had Yakan Dai Gaku as well, right? I wasn't able to watch it this time, I'm afraid." He got into the car, buckling up then waited on Die to do the same before heading back towards their house.

"Yeah... it was nice." He sniffed a bit and then pulled his e-cigarette out of his pocket and turned it on, taking a drag.

Kyo's eyes flicked over to the e-cig, his lips curving downward a bit. "Die....are you sure you're alright?"

Die blinked, wondering what part he was putting forward so much that it was showing through to Kyo. He didn't want to worry him, didn't want to push his shit on the other... and yet some part of him still wanted someone to understand him and actually know his problems. But... not today. He plastered on a smile and nodded. "I'm fine. Why?"

Kyo watched Die from the corner of his eye before he had to focus on the road. He shrugged slightly. "You just seem off, baby."

"I was up too late last night; I think I'm like... lack of sleep drunk or something..." Die shrugged slightly, taking another puff from his e-cig and staring out the side window.

Kyo frowned a bit but didn't push the issue any further. It wasn't long before they were pulling up into their driveway. He gathered the bags and got out, going to unlock the door, pulling it open then waiting on Die.

Die went to the mailbox and removed their mail before coming back up the driveway and slipping inside, ditching his shoes before making his way into the living room and flopping on the couch. "Don't wanna eat in the kitchen."

Kyo followed suit, slipping out of his shoes and just bringing their food to the living room. "Suits me." He took everything out and opened the box, grabbing the pair of disposable chopsticks and digging in. "Mm, starving..."

Die leaned over to get the bag of booze to cover his blanch at Kyo saying he was starving. The hard part was going to be even eating anything at all in front of Kyo, and he knew he was going to have to eat as much as usual if he wanted to keep his secret, which... on the plus side, would probably expand his stomach to insane levels of discomfort and make him throw up without even trying. He took one of the spring rolls and stuck it in his mouth, pulling out the mochi and heading off toward the kitchen with them. He put them away and while in there, snuck a third of the roll to the cats.

Kyo watched Die head for the kitchen with the mochi then shrugged, leaning back and flipping on the TV. He ate a bit more than his portion then started on his spring roll, channel surfing idly.

Die came back with only the very tip of his roll, settling down on the couch and putting the rest of it in his mouth, chewing, and swallowing. He stared at the bottle of cake vodka and then tilted his head back a little, staring up at the ceiling. "Saw Boss the other night... he's got a new line of clothing set to come out in September."

Kyo shifted over when Die came back then handed him the food. "Oh yeah? What's it like? Gonna get a few pieces?"

"There's a shirt I sort of like." He shrugged slightly. "Maybe a few pieces you'd like in there somewhere, but I suspect it was geared more toward Karou and Toshiya." He laughed and took the rice, not too thrilled by the prospect of being required to eat it.

Kyo chuckled and nodded, finally settling on watching some news program. "Yeah, most likely. I'll have to see what all he's got." He shifted a bit, resting his arm on the couch behind Die and leaning towards him a bit.

Die slowly began to eat his rice, finding it harder and harder not to just jam it into his mouth with Kyo being right there where he could see his every single move. Would he notice? Would he feel the four pounds he'd dropped in a week? No... that was stupid.

Kyo gave a yawn. He was exhausted from his trip and just happy to be home. Within a few minutes, he had started dozing off, his breathing evening out as he leaned more into Die's side.

Die was relieved by Kyo falling asleep and he did his best to just wait on the other to drift off completely, mostly picking at his rice in the meantime, keeping a careful eye on the other. It wasn't long before Kyo was completely out, his body going slightly limp and soft snores issuing from his mouth.

Die sighed softly as he closed up the rice container and put it aside, relieved. Maybe Kyo wouldn't dig around too much and wouldn't notice... though, he admittedly felt bad about wasting the food.

Kyo stayed asleep like that for nearly half an hour before he woke up with a start. He groaned and sat up, rubbing his eyes and looking at Die a little guiltily. "Sorry babe, didn't mean to crash on you."

Die shrugged slightly, reaching to ruffle Kyo's hair. "It's fine," he murmured softly. "You're tired."

Kyo gave Die a lopsided grin before shifting over to straddle his lap, kissing him lightly. "Mm I am…but...I was having an interesting dream." He smirked, wiggling his hips a bit.

Die's heart skipped a beat when Kyo slid into his lap, kissing at him. The truth of it was, when he was neck deep in his purges, he had almost no sex drive at all. The only saving grace was that Kyo didn't know because Die had never talked about it like that before. But... if he wasn't interested in sex with Kyo back after being gone for so long, he would be a dead giveaway that something horrible was wrong to start with.

With that in mind, Die determined he'd try to do his best to get himself into the gear of wanting this. "Oh? What about?" he asked softly.

Kyo smirked and leaned in to nip at Die's neck a bit. "Mm, well, I had you all tied up with red rope." He sucked at a patch of skin, leaving a light mark. "And you were sucking my cock, making all sorts of lewd noises."

Die let out a soft laugh, knowing usually he'd already be hard just at the mention of such a thing. But then... he saw his chance. If he did that, then maybe his own arousal issues could be overlooked, and Kyo would be satisfied. "Then... do it."

Kyo laughed softly against Die's neck, shaking his head. "Soon, baby, but right now...tonight...I just want you." He lifted his head and pushed his hand into Die's short hair, tugging lightly. "Upstairs?"

Die could have seriously groaned right then, but he kept it to himself, instead running his hand through Kyo's hair and then nodding. "You lead."

Kyo grinned and stood up, making his way towards the stairs, his hips swaying with each step. Die pulled himself up, snatched up the cake vodka bottle, and then wandered after Kyo. Kyo made his way to the bedroom, quickly ridding himself of his clothes and grabbing the lube. He wasn't in the mood to take it slow tonight.

Die stepped into the room and opened the lid, taking a swig and making a face. "Dear god... it's like... alcoholic cake... fuck." He took another big swig and then capped it, tossing it on the bed and pulling his shirt over his head. Ditching his pants, he slid onto the bed, face down, and ass up in the air.

Kyo snorted, shaking his head. "I don't think I'd like it." He climbed onto the bed beside Die, leaning down to press his lips to the back of his neck, his hand sliding down his spine. "Mm, I missed you."

"I missed you, too, baby... so much more than you know." Die ran his cheek over the bedspread and closed his eyes. "Take me, baby."

Kyo let out a soft sound then shifted back behind Die, squeezing his ass lightly before grabbing the lube. He squirted some on his fingers and made quick work of getting two of them inside Die's body, working them in and out. He quickly but thoroughly stretched Die before finally pulling his fingers out and adding lube to his cock, groaning as he gave himself a few strokes with it. He positioned himself behind Die and with one hand on his cock and the other on Die's hip, he pushed into his lover's body slowly, groaning. "Gods...you feel like heaven."

Die was almost relieved to have Kyo's cock inside him, the feeling of it making him happier than his fingers had and actually managing to pull some arousal from him. He let out a quiet moan, arching his backside up toward him.

Kyo's hands moved to Die's hips then spread out, sliding up along his back as he began thrusting into his lover's body. Die groaned softly, pawing lightly at the bed, again and again, huffing in between thrusts, grateful for his swelling dick. "Hnng!"

Kyo was oblivious of the fact that Die wasn't nearly as turned on as he was. He hunched over his lover, sinking his teeth into Die's shoulder as he slid his hand around to wrap around Die's cock, not paying attention enough to notice he wasn't fully hard.

Die squirmed a little and then groaned, arching enough to allow Kyo to stroke him at least slightly better than he had been. "Ah, baby... baby boy..."

Kyo grunted, jerking Die off in time with his thrusts which were becoming increasingly erratic, his hips snapping hard against Die's ass. "Fuck..Die..."

Die let out a soft whine, arching back toward Kyo, enjoying his lover's enthusiasm fully.

Kyo sat back, dragging his nails along Die's skin as he did. He released his lover's length and pulled out, pushing Die onto his back. He spread the other's legs, sliding between them and sinking back into his body with a groan. "Needed to see your gorgeous face," he panted out as he began thrusting once again.

Die's eyes went wide when Kyo pulled out. He rolled over when he was prompted, settling back in place and reaching for Kyo when his lover came down over him, wishing like hell that he wanted it more than he did. Granted, the intimacy was lovely, but he couldn't find his enthusiasm for gratification.

Kyo leaned in and buried his face against Die's neck, bucking his hips wildly. It wasn't long before he was crying out as he found his end, thrusting hard into Die then stilling as he came. "D-ie!"

Die arched up as Kyo plunged into him and started to cum. He moaned softly, reaching to push his hands through Kyo's hair. "Baby, I love you."

Kyo shuddered as the last of his orgasm slid through him. He lift his head and kissed Die hard before pulling back. "Mm I love you, too, Koi." He remained where he was for a few moments then eased out of Die, lying beside him and slipping his hand down to wrap around Die's length, beginning to stroke him once more.

Die shivered slightly when Kyo started to touch his cock. With a quiet whine, he closed his eyes and just felt, willing his body to work with him.

After a few minutes of jerking Die off, Kyo shifted down between his legs. He smirked up at him before leaning in and taking his cock between his lips. After giving the head a few good licks, he took nearly half of Die's length, slowly bobbing his head up and down with a groan.

Die let out a sharp cry as Kyo went down on him, closing his eyes and willing himself to just cum. He wanted it, and he wanted it bad, but it just wouldn't come down on him.

Kyo diligently bobbed his head on Die's cock, moaning around him as he sucked, his eyes flicking up to his lover's face. He was starting to think that it was taking quite some time for his lover to cum but pushed it from his head for the moment, reaching up to cup and squeeze Die's sac. "Mmnn.."

Die nearly wanted to cry he was so completely and utterly desiring his end. But a few more moments and finally, he found it with a shudder, though it had to be the weakest orgasm in all of his history, for sure.

Kyo felt Die shudder then tasted the first spurt of his lover's cum. He stayed where he was, waiting on the rest but when it didn't come, he lifted his head and sat back, licking his lips and looking up a Die. He was concerned, to say the least, that Die only came such a small amount, but he didn't immediately bring it up. Instead, he shifted to lie beside his lover, tugging him into his arms and pressing his lips to his forehead. "I missed you so much, baby."

Die lay there, feeling more exhausted than he was ultimately willing to put up with. He closed his eyes and lay there, curled up beside Kyo, his hand stroking over his side.

Kyo pushed his fingers through Die's hair, trying to get used to the short length. "Die...baby...are you sure you're alright?"

Die bit his lip a little bit and then sniffed, touching Kyo's cheek. If Kyo kept asking, he was going to cave, secrets from his lover wasn't exactly what he wanted. "Kyo... I..." he trailed off, tears sparkling in his eyes.

Kyo had closed his eyes while waiting on an answer from Die, his early exhaustion returning. When his lover spoke, he opened his eyes, blinking in surprise to see the look on Die's face. "Die...what is it?"

Die rolled over, pushing his face into Kyo's shoulder, his arms going around the other's middle. "I lost my control," he whispered, tears coursing down his cheeks. "I... I..." he hiccupped softly, shaking his head.

Kyo's eyes widened in alarm as Die started crying. He wrapped his arms around Die, rubbing his back soothingly. "What...what do you mean you lost your control? Over what?"

"I..." he didn't know how to say it. But after a few more moments, he managed to squeeze out, "there's no food because..." he curled in tighter against Kyo, "don't judge me... please don't... I can't... I just..."

Kyo's jaw clenched as Die more or less told him what was going on. His heart sank as his lover begged him not to judge him. He swallowed and let out a breath before speaking. "You mean you've started...binging and purging again?," he questioned, needing the clarification.

Die shook his head a little. "I just don't eat... and then if I do eat anything, I wait fifteen minutes-" he took a deep breath and just shrugged, unable to actually say the rest, but knowing Kyo would understand. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry."

Kyo stared down at Die, anger and sadness welling up inside him. He shifted back some and cupped Die's chin, tilting his head up. "Daisuke, baby...why?"

"I can't," he gasped in air, "handle it... I need us, and I can't, and we're... and they.... they're trying to rip us apart, and I can't deal." He burrowed himself closer against Kyo. "And I'm so fuckin' sorry."

The vocalist clenched his jaw and wrapped his arm around Die, holding him close. "Oh baby..." He was at a loss of words, wanting to scream and rage, but knowing that Die didn't need that.

If anything, Die was grateful the other wasn't yelling at him and didn't seem to be getting overly up in arms about it. He couldn't take that right then, and he just needed support more than anything. He curled his body as close as he could get it to Kyo, trying to stop the faint trembling in his core, the results of being overly emotional and malnourished.

Kyo shifted and rested his forehead atop Die's head, stroking his back lightly. After a while, he spoke up, his voice gentle but stern. "I want you to promise me that you'll work on stopping this. Those reporters don't mean a damn thing to us and our relationship."

Die pushed his nose against Kyo's armpit, closing his eyes and then, finally, nodding a little, breathing out a quiet, "Yeah... but... I need help. I can't do this alone."

Kyo nodded slightly. "I know, baby. I'm here for you every step of the way...even if it means you have get professional help this time."

Die nodded again and rubbed his face against Kyo before he pulled back and peered up at him. "I just... I'm sorry."

The vocalist shook his head. "Don't be sorry. Just get better." He leaned in and lightly kissed Die's lips.

Die let Kyo kiss him, but kept his lips closed so the other couldn't taste anything bad. He sniffed a bit and then slumped over. "I will do my best."

Kyo nodded then shifted down so he was laying down more than sitting up. "Good."

Die pursed his lips and then quietly got himself up. "I need to brush my teeth. I... um... yeah... earlier."

Kyo held back a grimace and waved his head. "Yeah, okay...go brush your teeth..." He hesitated for a moment then sat up. "I'll come with. Gotta do the same and should really piss before sleeping."

Die started toward the door, nodding. He was sort of glad Kyo was coming with him; it prevented him from shoving the toothbrush down his throat like an idiot.

He moved toward the sink and slowly started to apply tooth paste to his brush, then went about brushing his teeth, doing a very meticulous job of it.

Kyo slid off the bed and followed his lover into the bathroom, going to the second sink and starting to brush his own teeth. He hated feeling like he need to follow Die around, but he knew for the next few days and maybe weeks, he would be on his lover's tail. 

He finished up and spat into the sink then rinsed his mouth before moving to the toilet and taking care of business there. After he was finished, he rinsed his hands then leaned against the counter. "All done?"

Die finished up brushing just as Kyo was about to take a piss. For a long moment, Die found himself just paused, toothbrush in mid-air, foam on his lips, and then he blushed and looked away, spitting and rinsing his mouth out. For a long few moments, he hung over the sink, welcoming the feeling of it beneath his hands, waiting... almost relieved when Kyo asked if he was done, pulling him out of his personal hell.

With a sigh, he straightened up and wiped his mouth off with a towel, nodding. "Yeah... all done."

Kyo offered Die a little smile then took his hand, leading him back to their bedroom. There, he released Die to crawl into bed, wiggling beneath the sheets with a sigh. "It feels good to be back in our bed."

Die followed him and then settled down as well, heaving out a soft sigh as he settled down. "I bet. It always does after tour, too."

Kyo rolled over and curled against Die, letting out a soft sound. "Yeah, even more so after tour. At least in Kyoto, the hotel bed was decent."

Die closed his eyes and rolled around on the bed. "I love you..."

Kyo found Die's hand and squeezed it tightly. "I love you, too, Koi...we'll get through this."

"We have to," Die murmured. "I'm sorry."

Kyo squeezed tighter. "Shush."

Die slid closer to him and tucked his face against Kyo's neck again. "Thank you."

Kyo pressed his lips to Die's forehead. "You're welcome, baby. Anything to get you better..."

"Just hold me for now... right now that's what I need."

Kyo hummed and wrapped his arm around Die, pulling him impossibly close, burying his face against his love's neck.


	54. Chapter 54

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

It had been two weeks since Die had confessed to Kyo that his depression had pushed him to purging again. The singer had been trying to be as supportive as possible though he found it difficult to keep his spirits up. Today, he had decided that they needed to get out of the house. So, he packed a light lunch, Die's favorite wine and tea for himself up in a cooler then had gone and gotten one of Die's acoustic guitars. He set everything by the door then headed upstairs to wake up his still sleeping lover, crawling onto the bed behind him and nuzzling the back of his neck. "Hey...it's past noon..."

Die was slow to wake up, finally doing so when Kyo spoke up. He cracked open one eye and slid backward toward him, nuzzling in against him and then sighing softly. "Mmmm... hold me," he murmured out quietly.

Kyo hummed softly and shifted forward, molding himself against Die's back, his arm coming around his lover's midsection. He placed a few light kisses to Die's neck then settled for a moment, enjoying his warmth.

Die closed his eyes again and stuffed his face against the pillow. He'd been really uneasy for a few days now, and he was nearly exhausted from the few times he'd snuck off and thrown up like he wasn't supposed to.

Kyo held Die for several minutes before shifting back and lightly patting his hip. "C'mon, love, get up and get dressed. I've planned a little outing for us."

Die breathed out a little sound and then grunted. "A surprise?" He pushed himself toward the edge of the bed, stumbling as he started to get up. Straightening up, he licked his lips and then moved toward the bathroom.

Kyo chuckled softly and nodded. "Yeah, kinda. More along the lines of I'm tired of being cooped up in the studio and the house." He rolled off the bed and followed after Die, perching on the counter. "I thought maybe we could go somewhere isolated or something.

Die moved to the bathroom and moved to sit down, taking a much-needed piss with his head in his hands. "So tired lately," he murmured softly.

Kyo watched as his lover sat down to piss, frowning a little. He sighed and hopped off the counter, stepping over to run his fingers through Die's hair. "Maybe we should up the amount of vitamins you're taking..."

Die winced a little when Kyo spoke about vitamins. After a few moments, he just pulled Kyo close to him and pushed his face against his chest. "I just..." he sighed and then murmured, "I did it again... last night. I'm sorry."

Die's words made Kyo's heart sink, and he bit back a sigh as his arms came around his lover. He thought Die had been doing well with the light meals and nutrition shakes, but it seemed that they still had quite a way to go. 

Bending down, he kissed the top of Die's head. "What made you do it? Did something trigger it?"

Die shook his head a little. "No... I just… I don't know. There's not always an answer," he murmured quietly. After a moment, he let go of Kyo and reached to flush the toilet, standing up and then holding him again.

Kyo simply nodded, not sure what to say. When Die stood up, he moved back slightly then hugged him again, squeezing him tightly.

Die sniffed a bit and then hugged Kyo tighter. "I'm sorry, love... I'm trying, I really am." He shifted past him and quickly began to brush his teeth, moisturize, and fix his hair.

The vocalist rubbed Die's back. "I know, baby, I know. It's okay." He moved to check his own hair then went to the door. "I'm going to grab a blanket and some other things. Meet you downstairs." 

He went to the closet and got out a sturdy but soft blanket then grabbed his camera bag. He checked to make sure he had the right lenses then headed downstairs to wait.

Die was a bit surprised that Kyo let him actually be alone in the bathroom after that confession. But he liked the trust of it anyway. He licked his lips a bit and went about getting himself ready for the day. Once he was done, he came back into the bedroom and selected a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Once he was downstairs, he moved to put his shoes on, glancing over at Kyo.

Kyo had some reserves about leaving Die alone but he knew that there needed to be some amount of trust there. He had settled on the arm of the couch to wait after making sure he had everything they'd need. When Die joined him, he smiled and stood up, stepping into his sandals and shouldering his camera bag. He picked up the cooler and blanket then nodded toward the guitar. "I figured you might get inspired to play for me..."

Die smiled a bit at Kyo's thoughtfulness about bringing the guitar. He pushed his feet into flip-flops and wandered out after him, holding the guitar. "Yeah... I think I'd like that."

Kyo grinned then turned to lock the door before heading for the cars. "You wanna drive or...?" He didn't care either way but figured he'd give Die the choice.

"I think I'd like for you to drive, baby..." He smiled as he slid the guitar into the backseat and then got into the passenger side.

Kyo nodded and settled the cooler in the trunk before coming around and getting in the driver's seat. He leaned over to peck Die's cheek before starting the engine and pulling out onto the road.

Die smiled over at Kyo and then sat back in the seat, putting his sunglasses on. "Baby... you know I don't mean to be such a pain in the ass, right?"

Kyo shook his head, navigating through traffic then heading out of the city. He reached over and grasped Die's hand, holding it as he drove. "I know, Die. You're not a pain in the ass."

Die smiled. "Yeah... I am. But you put up with me well, so thank you."

Kyo just huffed out a laugh. For the next twenty minutes or so, he concentrated on the road, the landscape changing from city to more rural. Eventually, he turned onto smaller road, heading into a heavily wooded area. 

Finally, after going down a couple of narrow lanes, he pulled off near a rather large stream. Scattered about were some large boulders, including a couple flat ones that would make good seats. "What do you think?"

Die just watched the road quietly for a long while, finally smiling when he saw how 'alone' Kyo actually meant. He grinned when they came back to a stop and reached to rub Kyo's thigh. "I think it's lovely."

Kyo grinned and cut the engine, running his hand over Die's before unbuckling and slipping out of the car. He went around to get the cooler and blanket, then headed for once of the flat rocks. He folded the blanket over twice then spread it out, covering the ground. He settled down and opened up the cooler, grabbing one of the waters he'd brought along. "It's nice up here. Not too hot."

Die followed along with him and then settled down with his guitar, leaning back against one of the upright rocks and yawning a bit. "Mmm... it is nice."

Kyo pulled out another water and offered it to Die, then took out his camera and started fiddling with the settings, adjusting for the lighting in the area.

Die accepted the water and cracked it open, watching Kyo adjust his settings. "It's really lovely up here, honestly."

Kyo smiled, going about attaching the lens to his camera then lifting it, snapping a quick shot of Die before setting it back down. "Yeah, it is...and quiet. There's no people around, which is a big bonus." He shifted over to sit next to Die, leaning against him.

"Definitely a big plus," Die replied, sliding his arm around his lover. "So... while you were gone, I also worked on some music..." he looked a bit embarrassed.

Kyo leaned more into Die once the other's arm was around him. When the guitarist mentioned working on music, Kyo's eyes lit up. "Oh, yeah? Like what?"

Die shifted to take his arm back, pulling the guitar into his lap and starting to strum out one part of the song he'd been writing, his eyes closed.

Kyo shifted and watched as Die got his guitar, smiling. Music began issue from the instrument, and he closed his eyes as well, listening, almost immediately loving the sound of it.

Die finished through the first time and then paused for a moment, murmuring, "Second layered part... this should be on electric..." and then began playing it as well, clearing his throat and then starting to sing at certain points.

Kyo grunted softly to let Die know he'd heard him then continued to listen, liking the song more and more. He was swaying slightly with his eyes closed when Die's voice made them pop open in surprise. He had not been expecting Die to sing.

Die had been watching Kyo, waiting on a reaction, and he grinned when the other reacted the way he did, still continuing on.

Kyo opened his mouth then closed it, not wanting to interrupt Die at that point. Instead, he shifted carefully and grabbed his camera again. Changing a few things, he aimed it at Die and began taking shots of him, leaning this way and that for the perfect angle.

Die finished up the song and then settled down his guitar. "There's drums and bass, too, but I haven't got a way to really show you that right now."

When Die was finished, Kyo once again set aside his camera. He crawled forward on his knees and straddled Die's lap, leaning in to kiss his lips softly. "I like it...a lot."

Die grinned, reaching to gently touch Kyo's cheek. "Mmm... good."

Kyo sat back and tugged Die's hair lightly. "Where'd it come from? The urge to sing?"

Die grinned and then shrugged. "I'm not sure. But while you were gone, I wrote it as a sort of comfort."

Kyo leaned in and pecked Die's lips again, looking faintly sad at the thought. "Hnn...I see. I'm sorry you needed the comfort, but I really do like the piece. Will you record it?"

"I think I'll do it for YakanDaiGaku... what do you think?" He took a sip of the water and then sniffed.

Kyo shifted off of Die's lap and dug in the cooler for tea and one of the sandwiches he'd brought. Settling again, he took a bite and nodded. "I think the fans would like that."

Die let out a quiet chuckle. "I'm sure they will, for sure." He sniffed slightly and tilted his head back. "Okay... give me a sandwich, I'll try."

Kyo smiled slightly then grabbed a sandwich, passing it to Die. "I hope you like it."

Die accepted it, pulling off the plastic wrapping and sniffing it a bit. Finally, he took a small bite and began chewing it, giving Kyo a thankful little grunt.

Kyo watched his lover carefully, his going to rest on Die's thigh as he ate his own food, eyes scanning the horizon.

Die took his time eating the sandwich, feeling rather like he was going to throw up, but managing to keep himself okay for the most part.

Kyo finished his off then turned back to look at Die. Frowning a bit, he reached out to grab Die's wrist, stopping him from taking another bite. "Don't force yourself, too much. Ok?"

Die paused when Kyo grabbed his wrist, tilting his head a little and then nodding, lowering his hand. "I just... I want to make the effort, but... my stomach doesn't." He shrugged slightly.

Kyo nodded, releasing Die's wrist then sitting back. "It's okay...or it will be, at least." After taking a drink of his tea, he nodded towards a little path. "Do you want to take a walk?"

Die smiled and then carefully wrapped up the rest of his sandwich, putting it back in the basket Kyo had brought along. He stood up and offered his hand to Kyo. "I'd like that."

Kyo stood, grabbing his camera then heading towards the path, holding tight to Die as they walked. "I'm 90% certain that our things will be okay. This place is pretty remote."

"It's not like we can't replace it if it's not. And if someone feels the need to steal partly eaten food, then they probably need it more than we do." He laced his fingers with the other man's, stepping carefully over a branch and then onto the actual path. "So what brought this all on anyway?"

Kyo chuckled softly. "That's very true." He was quiet for a few minutes then turned to look at Die. "I thought that....we needed a change of scenery."

Die smiled a little. "I'm glad you thought that, because it feels really nice."

Kyo smiled a bit and nodded. "Yeah, it really does." He paused, bringing his camera up and fixing the lens before turning to take a few photos of the stream and then an up close shot of a tiny white flower blooming on a root. "It's perfect for inspiration."

Die followed along, quiet when Kyo went into photograph nature mode. It was nice seeing this part of Kyo up close and personal. Some part of him hadn't managed to witness it enough, and he just remained silent, waiting, watching.

Kyo shifted around, eventually getting on his knees and leaning back slightly, photographing the canopy above them. When he was done, he let his camera hang around his neck and stood up again. He turned his eyes to Die and smiled. "This lighting suits you, Die."

The words caught Die off guard, and he licked his lips a little. "Yeah?" He bit his lower lip and pushed his hands into his pockets. "Does it make me look less... blah?"

Kyo couldn't not stop the frown that formed on his face. With a soft sigh, he shook his head. "Die, you don't look blah to begin with. I meant, though, that it works nicely with your skin tone and eyes."

Die shifted slightly on his feet, tilting his head and then shrugging. "I know I haven't been looking my best since I went all... fucked up again. But thank you."

The vocalist leveled Die with a serious gaze, stepping forward and resting his hands on his shoulders. "Daisuke, you're too hard on yourself. Sure, you look a bit pale and too much on the skinny side, but that doesn't matter. You're still beautiful to me."

Die actually nearly teared up at Kyo's words. He pulled his hands from his pockets and reached to simultaneously rub his hand through his hair and the other on his thigh. "Thank you, love."

Kyo leaned in and pressed his lips to Die's cheek. "You're welcome." He pulled away and grasped Die's hand, going along the trail once again.

Die walked alongside Kyo, pausing and watching as a little lizard rushed across the ground in front of them. He smiled after it. "Long-tail lizard. Not native... someone must have let the little guy go."

Kyo paused and looked down, watching the lizard stop on a root and look around. "That's a shame. It's a shame that some people just let their pets go rather than trying to place them." He turned and very quietly kneeled, raising his camera and trying for shot of the reptile. Unfortunately, something startled it and off it scurried into the thicker woods. "Damn it! Quick little bastard."

Die watched Kyo attempt to get a shot of it. "Yeah, like the bunny... why someone would be that cruel, I will never know or understand." He sighed, shaking his head.

Kyo clucked his tongue the stood back up. "Yeah, me either. I get that things happen, but there are better solutions than just turning them loose." He took Die's hand again and walked some more, falling into a comfortable silence.

Die let out a grunt of agreement, silently traipsing along beside Kyo, trying to ensure he was keeping in pace with his lover.

Kyo continued on for some time before turning down another path, taking them back towards their picnic area.

Die lagged a bit behind on purpose, finding a patch of wild flowers. He picked one of the ones that was near the end of its cycle, following after Kyo and then holding it out to him. "I love you."

Kyo stopped once he realized Die had and turned to see what was wrong. Spotting the flower in Die's hand and hearing the words, he grinned widely and took the flower. "I love you, too, Koi." He stuck the flower behind his ear then moved to embrace Die in a tight hug.

Die beamed at him and tugged him in close, nuzzling against his neck. Leaning in, he murmured, "You're adorable sometimes, and I'm the one person on this planet allowed to say it."

Kyo laughed, pushing his fingers through Die's hair. "You're the only one that gets to see it too...I can't be letting my guard down."

"Mmm... because adorable Kyo is all mine, that's why." He cupped his cheek and then pressed a soft kiss to his lips.

Kyo smiled then returned the kiss, his fingers massaging the back of Die's neck as he did. After several long moments, he finally pulled away and tugged Die along back to where their things were. "You know, it's going to be dark soon. I would love to lay out here under the stars with you."

The thought of being under the stars with Kyo, just out in the closest to the middle of nowhere they could get was pleasant. "I'd like that."

Kyo smiled again then moved over to the blanket and plopping down onto it. He took his shoes off and tugging his shirt off then leaned back, patting the space beside him. "C'mere, my gorgeous Daisuke...," he beckoned, reaching for a water and couple of strawberries.

Die settled down next to the other, sitting cross-legged and watching Kyo as he took off his shirt. "Mmm... half naked Kyo. I love it."

Kyo grinned and shifted over, pressing himself to Die's side. "Mm, I bet. You get a good look at my awesome abs," he quipped, tensing his stomach up a bit.

De let out a quiet laugh and then reached to run his fingertips over Kyo's abdomen. "Mmm... such lovely abs they are, too."

Kyo let out a soft sound of pleasure, his eyes closing for a moment. "Mm, thank you...I owe part of them to you...since you keep me so busy in bed." He smirked up at Die, leaning up to nip his chin.

Die chuckled. "Wonder what the fans would say if they knew that part of your gorgeous physique is actually from fucking me into the mattress."

Kyo's grin widened, his hand moving to trace over Die's lips. "The same thing they would say if they knew that those nights when your lips are at their plumpest are nights that they've been around my cock."

Die let out a soft sound and then shifted to straddle Kyo's hips, staring down at him as he slid his hands over his chest and abdomen. "Mmm... some fans would definitely like that... and some would be peeved off."

Kyo grunted softly as Die straddling him, his body reacting rather favorably to the familiar weight settled there. "Mm, I'm sure. I would love to stare in their eyes and kiss you full on the mouth, show them our rings....even recite our vows." He tugged Die down to kiss him deeply before murmuring, "No one in this world could make me change my mind about you and our future."

Die kissed him back firmly and once he'd released him and spoke the final words, he murmured, "Do you really mean that? The in front of them part?"

Kyo brought his hands up to cup Die's face. "Yes, I do. I am not and will never be ashamed of us."

Something inside Die shifted in that moment, and he breathed out a sigh of relief. "Even if they catch us? If they actually completely out us? You're completely okay with that?"

Kyo licked his lips and breathed in before nodding. "Yes...it's their business if they want to be bent out of shape over it. I love you. Period."

Die looked nearly ready to cry, attaching himself down on Kyo. "I love you, too, baby... I love you so very much."

Kyo lifted Die's head and kissed him deeply, pouring his emotions into it. When they parted, he gazed into his love's eyes and smiled softly. "I am tired of being so careful. If they see, let them see. Management can suck my dick. There's no way in hell they'd dump me anyway."

Die pressed his forehead to Kyo's own, closing his eyes for a moment. "Then we do this together. We don't fully flaunt it, but we do what we want. And if everyone finds out in the meantime, the so be it. No more stressing over it, no more tears and no more fears."

Pushing his hands into Die's hair then settling them on his back, he nodded his head slightly. "Yes, no more tears or fears, Koi...they aren't worth your pain or stress."

Die sniffed a little and then nodded. "Okay." He let out a soft breath and let himself relax. "Mmm..."

Kyo held Die to him tightly, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. He closed his eyes and imagined what it'd be like to wander around with Die without having to be careful. It wasn't as though they had to keep themselves from screwing in the middle of the street or anything but a touch here, a smooch there would still give it all away.

Die nuzzled slightly on the other's touch and then licked his lips, hesitantly rocking his hips. "You made me feel so comfortable in your presence, love."

Kyo gave a little shiver at the movements of Die's hips, his own arching up in response. "Mm, I'm glad...otherwise I'd have quite a problem on my hands." He let out a chuckle then tilted Die's chin up, kissing him again though this held more heat, more desire.

Die groaned quietly, returning Kyo's kiss with equal fervor. He didn't hold himself back the way he would have usually in public. This time, he went with it, went with what he was feeling.

Kyo could feel the way Die loosened up and gave into the kiss, and it made him groan. Looping his arm around Die, he twisted them over so that he was on top, their bodies flush together. He broke the kiss and nuzzled against Die's jawline, going to press his lips to his ear. "You are the most amazing man in the world, Koi."

Die let Kyo manipulate him, fully okay with anything Kyo chose to do after that confession from a few moments before. He shifted one leg up, his thigh up against his side. "I have a run for my money in you, baby."

A chuckle bubbled from his lips and he shook his head, giving Die's earlobe a nip as he rocked his hips down, his need evident as he did. "Let's agree that we're both amazing, yes?"

"Mmm, I think I can manage that," he murmured softly. In response, he grabbed Kyo's hips and tugged him closer. "It's almost dark."

Kyo groaned softly then smirked. "So it is...are you afraid of the dark, love? Surely I can find something to take your mind off of it," he purred out, his tongue swiping over Die's Adam's apple.

Die chuckled, just going with it. "Terrified. Fix it for me?"

Shifting back to look into Die's eyes, he laughed then reached up to caress his lover's face. "Are you sure, darling?"

"I think I am," he grinned, "well, as much as I can be!"

Kyo smiled then leaned down to kiss Die once more before sitting up and pushing the other's shirt up and off. Once Die's skin was bared, he ran his hands over his chest, letting his fingertips toy with his nipples lightly before sliding down and over his ribs. "Sometimes you remind me of a porcelain doll. So fragile, but so very beautiful. It brings out a fierce protectiveness in me."

Die leaned into the touch and smiled softly. He let out a soft sound and then murmured, "Not entirely fragile, but broken in a lot of ways. I think it's how we fit. Our broken parts fill the other's voids."

Kyo gave Die a sad smile before reaching to grab his hand, placing it over his heart. "It doesn't matter what's broken or not, now. You have and will continue to mend me."

Die closed his eyes, fighting back the wave of emotion. After a few moments, he murmured, "And you, me."

Kyo smiled, his lip trembling the slightest bit. He swallowed a couple of times then bent down start kissing a trail down Die's chest, his hand caressing his side gently as he went.

Die arched into the touch, breathing out a soft sigh as the other moved down his body. When he got to his belly button, he let out a quiet laugh. "Do you know, I once thought about piercing that?"

Kyo glanced up and dipped his tongue into Die's naval before smirking. "Oh? You should...it would be a sexy little secret for me...like my cock," he grinned the nipped the edge of it before following Die's scant treasure trail to the edge of his pants. He moved along the edge, going to Die's hipbone and scrapping his teeth over it before finally lifting his head up again. Smiling, he reached to undo Die's pants, getting them open and lightly brushing his hand over his lover's crotch.

Die let out a grunt. "Too much pain for my taste though. It's why I didn't do it." He laughed. "And it was a long time ago."

He pushed his hips up when Kyo got his pants open, closing his eyes. "I like this," he murmured quietly, "the slowness, and the way you're paying attention to little details."

Kyo laughed softly. "Mm, I see. Well, if you ever change your mind, you have my approval." He grasped Die's pants and pulled them and his boxers down and off then ran his fingers over the patch of neatly trimmed hair at the base of Die's length. "I'm glad. I want to love every inch of you...." he murmured, shifting tolie down between Die's legs, turning and pressing a kiss to his inner thigh.

Die let out a soft laugh. "Every inch?" He grinned. "There's quite a few of those, love."

Kyo grinned up at Die from between his legs, moving to nip the other thigh. "It doesn't matter, love. Even if you were as big as a sumo, I'd still want to." He chuckled then took Die's length in his hand, bending to wrap his lips around the tip, lightly caressing it with his tongue.

Die leaned his head back. He'd meant it more in the dick sort of way, but the fact that Kyo had gone that direction with it made him feel a bit more at ease. He smiled softly and reached to caress the other's hair as he started to suck his cock.

Kyo took his time with his lover's cock, going to kiss down the length of it and back up before finally engulfing it in his mouth. He brought his hand up to lightly fondle Die's sac, rolling the smooth orbs with his fingers. "Mmnn..."

Arching slightly, Die let out a whine and then settled back, allowing Kyo to simply fondle and suck him, feeling like he was experiencing a treasured moment right then.

Kyo kept his actions light as he lifted his head then slid it back down, not really ramping up the speed or anything. After several long moments, he pulled off of Die's cock and moved to bury his nose in the hair at the base, nuzzling him there then bringing his hand to press against his lower abdomen, his eyes flicking up to Die's face.

Die arched up a bit and then whimpered, licking his lips as the other nuzzled against him and pressed at his abdomen. Die huffed out a soft sound and then bit his lower lip, his cheeks heating up slightly.

Kyo let a smile curve his lips upward at Die's reaction, having gotten exactly what he'd hoped for. He shifted up to kiss the area he was pressing then sat back again. He stood up, gazing down at Die as he unfastened his pants, shucking them off, followed by his boxers, revealing his achingly hard cock to the air and Die's gaze. He reached down and gave himself a couple of strokes before settling beside Die. He cupped his cheek and leaned to kiss him softly before going to his throat, licking and nipping all along there, his hand sliding over his chest and abdomen. "Gorgeous..."

Die let out a soft sigh as Kyo let up and moved up. He watched him stand up and then smiled softly as his lover began undressing. "You never fail to be the most gorgeous person."

Kyo snorted and rolled on top of Die, drawing his leg up to hook around his back, their cocks pressed together. "Again, let's agree to disagree?" he said with a smirk.

Die chuckled and then groaned as Kyo pushed their cocks together. He breathed out a sigh. "Hnng, baby."

Kyo rocked his hips, rubbing against Die with a groan. "I'm so hard for you, Die. I need you so bad."

"Then take what you need from me, love."

Kyo smiled then reached into their basket, pulling out a small bottle of lube. He gave Die a sheepish look when he revealed it and shrugged. "I came prepared..."

Taking the cap off, he shifted and poured some over Die's length, smirking at his lover as he smeared it around, getting him good and lubed up. Once he was satisfied, he added a bit more to the tip of Die's cock then straddled him, reaching back to hold him in place as he slowly sank down onto him with a groan. "O-oh...Gods...Die...."

Die was more than a bit surprised when Kyo decided to put lube on his cock and then mount him. He let out a gasp, hips jerking up a little bit that he couldn't contain, a small whimper issuing from his lips. "Oh my god," he whispered out. "Kyo."

Kyo shuddered as he fully seated himself on Die's length, a moan escaping his as Die's hips jerked up. "Gods, feels so good, baby..." He was still for a bit then finally shifted forward, placing his hands on Die's chest, his hips very lightly circling.

Die started to slowly push his hips up, time and again, moaning as he thrust up into his lover's body. It felt amazing and he just couldn't stop himself. Kyo groaned and rolled with Die's movements, his hands sliding to either side of the other's body as he pushed back. "Hnng..."

Somehow, Die was still in awe. He wasn't used to this, to being in the midst of such a tender moment while they were in the middle of the closest to nowhere one could get in Japan. And Kyo riding him was something truly rare, something that had only happened a few times in the past. It filled him with a certain joy to be experiencing it, no matter how much his sexuality was suffering from his disorders.

Kyo dipped his head down, capturing Die's lips as he pushed back onto his length, moaning at the feeling of his lover filling him. It was, in short, amazing to be with Die like this. It felt so free, so intimate. "I love you," he whispered against the other's lips, his hand moving to grasp Die's and place it on his hip.

"I love you, too, gorgeous," Die returned, gasping out the last bit as Kyo sank down on him again. His fingers lightly dug into Kyo's hip as he arched up a bit more, thrusting quicker.

As Die's thrusts quickened in pace, Kyo felt his length brushing over his prostate causing him to shudder. He shifted back slightly and cried out as he found the perfect spot. "A-ah! Die...there...harder please!"

There wasn't a single moment of hesitation in Die. He picked right up and began thrusting into the other's body full-force, doing his best to keep the angle he was at despite it being difficult to maintain.

Kyo let out another cry as Die pounded directly into his prostate. He reached between them and started stroking his cock hard and fast, gasping out of breath as he raced toward orgasm. "Die...I'm cumming...cum with...me!," he panted out, his body shuddering as he gave himself a few more strokes the cried out Die's name as he lost, thick spurts of cum painting Die's stomach. "Daisuke!"

Die gritted his teeth, doing his best to fuck up into Kyo in the same way until the other came. A few seconds elapsed between them as he found a better position and then pounded up into Kyo with a few groans, finally stilling as he started to cum, losing it deep inside his lover.

Kyo leaned back slightly, still holding his cock. He moaned softly as he felt his lover's cum filling him. "Gods...yes..."

Die eased up and then lay back, panting softly, rather exhausted after that. "Jesus fucking shit," he hissed out.

Kyo groaned then shot Die a lopsided grin before gently pulling off of Die. He collapsed next to him on the blanket and curled up against his side, his head resting on Die's shoulder. "I agree..."

Breathing out a sigh, Die closed his eyes and turned enough to gently place his hand on Kyo's hip. He felt like he should say something, but honestly, he just didn't even know where to start or what it was he wanted to say. So, instead, he simply remained silent.

Kyo had closed his eyes and now opened them to peer at his lover. "You're beautiful, Koi." He smiled and leaned forward, pressing a light kiss to Die's lips before reaching his hand out to run up and down his side.

Die let out a little grunt. He wouldn't be a jackass and respond to that how his mind automatically did. Instead, he just returned the kiss and lightly ran his nails over Kyo's side.

Kyo let out a sigh and closed his eyes once more, feeling content in the moment. It wasn't until he heard an owl in the distance that he shifted onto his back and looked up at the star-filled sky. "Look, it's so clear..."

Die shifted as well, pulling up his pants in the process and fastening them back up. He reached for one of the napkins and stuffed it in his pants, cleaning up and then cleaning his belly as well, tossing it in the little trash bag they'd set up. At long last, he looked up at the sky and smiled. "Yeah, it is."

Kyo, completely unconcerned with cleaning up at the moment, shifted over to lie on Die's arm, his hand resting on his belly. A shooting star zoomed across the sky, and he made a silent wish to it, praying to the Gods for Die's health above all.

Die saw the star as well, and he closed his eyes, making a wish for Kyo's voice to remain healthy, for the longevity of his lover's career, if not his own, and for their happiness. A single tear slid down into his hair, and he just remained there, hoping Kyo wouldn't notice.

After Kyo was done with his silent wish, he turned to peer at his lover, his chest tightening as he spotted the glint of moisture sliding down Die's face. He gave a soft sigh and turned, ignoring the sky in favor of pressing his forehead to Die's.

Die offered a slightly sheepish smile when Kyo turned to him like that. He knew he'd seen and he wished he could explain; but to explain a wish was to nullify it, and he knew that better than anyone. Rather, he just squeezed Kyo's hip.

Kyo hummed softly and finally shifted back to look up once more. After several more long moments, a cool breeze swept through the trees, causing him to shiver and huff out irritably. "I guess I should get dressed before I catch cold," he grumbled, moving tug his pants back on as well as his shirt.

"Preferable. Last thing we need is a sick Kyo on our hands." Die shifted upright and used some of the wet wipes to wipe of his hands before gathering up their basket, putting things back into it and then pulling out his phone to check it. He groaned, shoving it back in. "Four missed calls. Two from Inoue, one from upper management general number, and one from Karou. I think I'm in deep shit for something."

Kyo assisted in packing up their stuff then turned to look at Die. "Wonder what it is..." He pulled out his own phone and noted that there was only a text from Kaoru asking him to have Die call. "Kaoru texted and said for you to call," he informed, frowning a little.

Die sighed, letting Kyo handle the basket as he fished his phone out again, staring at the numbers. Which one to call first? Kaoru, perhaps, was the most innocuous on the list. He pushed in the number and then put the phone to his ear, trudging back toward the car.

Kaoru picked up on the third ring. "Die? My god, where the hell are you two?"

Die sighed. "On a date," he muttered, "remind me to thank management for such a lovely end to it, too."

For a moment the older man was silent and then he sighed. "Well, then... this can wait. I'll tell them it has to."

"Just spit it out, man. It's obviously important enough for four calls."

"A girl has turned up in the papers... claiming she has your lovechild. Are you pleased to hear that?"

Die paled and stopped dead in his tracks. His voice was deadly serious when he spoke again. "If this is a joke, I will punch you in the fucking throat when I see you next. I am not kidding."

"No joke. She sold her story to one of those gossip rags and they published without even trying to go through us to get more money. Not usual routine, but... Die... the kid looks a lot like you in the pictures."

Die clenched his jaw. "Let me guess. I'm in deep shit over someone else's bullshit now? Because I have never not been careful."

"Well, you did get an STD back in the day... and... well... the kid's about six... those weren't good times for you, buddy." Kaoru sounded apologetic, and Die just paled even further.

"I have to go, Kaoru. What paper?"

Kaoru provided the name, and Die sighed, thanking him and hanging up. Glancing at Kyo, he shook his head. "I fucked up apparently... big time."

Kyo showed up at the car with their things and peered at Die as he hung up the phone. The guitarist looked rather pale and he frowned. "What...how?" he questioned, settling the cooler and basket in the trunk.

Die gestured. "Can we... get in the car first?" With that, he opened his own door and slid inside, closing the door and leaning forward with his face in his hands. Some finish to the night this would be. And there was no smooth way to say it.

Kyo's frown deepened but he slid into the driver's seat, buckling up and starting the car to warm it up. "Die...what on earth is happening?"

"Promise me you won't hate me... if... if it's true?" Die reached to pinch the bridge of his nose and then sat back, crossing his arms over his chest in a defensive posture.

Kyo stared at Die for a minute then shrugged. "I promise I won't hate you if whatever piece of frivolous bullshit that's come up now is true," he intoned, feeling more irritated by the moment. "What is it? Some chick trying to claim you've fathered her brat?"

Die turned his face away, not liking the tone of Kyo's voice, not liking that he was pissing his lover off like this... and truly not liking that he'd probably fucked up somewhere along the lines. "Yeah... exactly that," he finally breathed out, "it's in one of the dirt rags."

Kyo's head snapped around and he stared at Die with his mouth agape. "Wait...what?! She didn't even come to you first??"

"No. And the rag didn't contact our management either, they just ran it. No protocol at all." He closed his eyes and then whispered, "Kao says the kid would be six and... that's when... when..." he couldn't even finish, just shaking his head.

The vocalist was seething by this point, though not at Die but at the woman. As Die mentioned the child's age, he gritted his teeth, images of the various skanky women he watched Die disappear with night after night flashing through his head. "....I see," was all he could manage in way of response. He wasn't angry with Die. It wasn't as if his lover had cheated on him, but the idea of a child suddenly in their lives as well as the child's mother was not sitting well with him. "I suppose the best thing to do would be to get DNA tests as soon as possible. Otherwise, she's full of shit and can fuck off."

Die swallowed hard and then nodded. "Stop by a convenience store, and I'll get the paper... see if I even recognize her." Though, damn lot of good that would do if he'd been dead drunk at the time.

Kyo nodded and finally pulled back onto the road, heading towards town. After several quiet minutes, he glanced over at Die. "What will you do if the child is yours?"

When the question came, Die couldn't say it was unexpected, he'd been pondering the same from the moment the words had been out of Kaoru's mouth. After a few moments, he sighed. "Take responsibility and support the child. No way in shit I'm dealing with the mother though. I'm in a committed relationship, we're engaged, and she didn't fucking tell me until six years into the child's life? Fuck that."

Kyo simply let out a grunt of affirmation. He'd expected as much. It was only right that Die take care of a kid he'd fathered. He finally pulled into a convenience store and parked.

Die sat there for a moment and then quietly got out of the car, trudged inside, found the issue of the gossip magazine that Kaoru had told him about along with a twelve pack of Heineken. He came back out, getting back into the car before putting the beer in the floorboard and buckling up. "I refuse to look until we're home."

Kyo waited while Die was in the store, looking at his phone a few times, considering messaging Kaoru. He didn't though and when Die came back, he dropped it back in his pocket. "I don't blame you...," he muttered, pulling out of the parking lot and heading towards their house at a slightly faster than normal clip.

It didn't take them long to get home, and Die got out quickly, picking up the beer and the magazine, along with the blanket. He left the basket for Kyo, unable to get it all and not crush things. 

He unlocked the door and disarmed the alarm, kicking off his shoes and going straight to the kitchen. He ripped open the box of beer and pulled out two, popping the lids off and putting one beside him on the counter, the other in hand. He downed a good half of it before sighing and opening the paper, scanning articles.

Kyo glanced at Die as he got out, letting out a sigh and getting out himself. He moved around to gather the basket and cooler, setting them in the garage for now. He made his way and kicked off his shoes before going to the kitchen to stand next to Die. He glanced at the already open beer and sighed again, picking it up and taking a health swig. "Well?"

Die shrugged a little, downing the other half and moving to toss the empty in the garbage. He pulled out another and opened it as well, flipping the page. "Haven't found it yet." He flipped a few more pages and then stopped, seeing the headline scrawled across the page.

Die from the popular band, Dir en grey, has child out of wedlock.

Die winced, leaning over the counter, nursing at his beer as he read down the page, most of it rude things about his past, trash talk about his sexuality, and the rumors that he was dating men now. 

Somewhere down the page, a name was mentioned that Die didn't recognize, the woman talking about how she'd had sex with him shortly before he'd left to go to America for their second time over there - Family Values Tour - and how he'd been a rather poor lover in bed. She claimed she found out she was pregnant around a month later and had no other intercourse in the timeframe, so she knew it was his.

Die scanned down the page, finding no photo of her, but one of the child. And Kaoru was right; he had the same brow-line and the most piercingly gorgeous eyes. It very well could have been his child, and he shook his head, shoving the paper to Kyo. "I don't recognize the name, and I honestly don't recall if I fucked anyone before the tour or not... I know I did a lot of bad things on the tour, but... not sure about before it."

Kyo shrugged and took another drink of the beer, downing almost half of it. He set it back down and watched Die read through the article bearing a rather nasty headline that made him roll his eyes. "It isn't the fucking 50s anymore..." He watched Die's expression change as he got to the photo and when Die finally shoved it over to him, he was almost hesitant to even look. He did, however, and the boy's resemblance to his lover was almost uncanny. He felt like he'd been punched in the gut as he read over the article quickly then stared at the photo again. "....We'll have to contact Inoue in the morning and get the lawyers to do the DNA test...." 

He stood there for a moment then pushed the paper into the trash can before downing the rest of his beer then going to grab a bottle of Jack from the cabinet.

Die all but chugged the second beer, angrily throwing the bottle in the trash before he grabbed another and headed toward the stairs. "I need a shower." With that, he took the stairs two at a time and made his way into the bathroom, starting the shower and then stripping off. He pulled his phone from his pocket and quickly dialed Inoue's number. 

Their manager answered on the third ring. "Die? Did you-"

"I saw it," Die growled out. "I'll do a paternity test. Just tell me when and where. And don't fuck with me on this, I don't want or need wasted time or drawn out shit. I'll pay whatever it takes to get this found out as soon as possible. Period." Without waiting on a reply, he hung up the phone and opened the beer with the edge of the counter, downing a third before setting it there and getting into the shower, starting to angrily wash off.

Kyo watched Die stalk off upstairs before he opened the bottle of Jack and took a long pull from it. He stood in the kitchen for a moment then snorted, taking another drink then heading for the guest bathroom, needing his own shower. They didn't need this shit right now, and he was angry at the universe for raining it down on them. Especially after they'd had such a beautiful moment earlier. "So much for wishing on stars," he muttered as he stepped into the steaming water.

Die took most of his shower in anger and then finally, slid down the wall and pushed his face against his knees, letting out a quiet sob and finally allowing himself to cry. What had he done in his life to deserve this shit storm? He'd always been careful, always used a condom and always checked after to make sure it wasn't broken. He supposed a tiny hole he couldn't have seen, but he was always so meticulous. And now this... and that kid looked so much like him. His shoulders heaved as he began to sob so hard he was nearly retching with the force of it.

Kyo was done with his shower in a matter of minutes and when he shut the water off, he could hear Die's sobs coming from upstairs due to the bathrooms being on top of one another. He growled angrily and struck out at the shower wall before stepping out and grabbing a towel to sling around his waist. 

He made his way upstairs and knocked on the bathroom door. "Daisuke...?"

Die jerked the moment he heard Kyo's knock and attempted to scramble up from the floor. In the process, he slipped and went crashing back down to the floor, hitting his knee pretty hard. "Fuck!"

Kyo heard the crash and was in the bathroom in an instant, going to kneel beside Die. He could see the blood oozing from his lover's knee, and he winced, reaching out to lightly place his hand on Die's shoulder. "Die..."

Die reached up to flip off the water just as Kyo came in, and he shifted over, staring down at his knee and cursing under his breath again. "Slipped... that's all."

Kyo just nodded and grabbed the washcloth, placing it on Die's knee to soak up the blood. Once he'd done that, he shifted his way next to Die and took his hand, squeezing it tightly. "You know...no matter what...I will still love you..."

Die looked down at his knee, unable to look up. He shrugged slightly and then leaned his head back on the wall, a few more tears coursing down his cheeks. "I'm sorry... I'm so fucking sorry, you have no idea. If I could take it all back, I would. All the lies... to myself and to others, all the fucked up shit I did that year."

Kyo sighed and drew his knees up, resting his head on them. "I know...but it's over. It's done. You're not that person anymore..."

"I'm not, but it's certainly coming back to haunt me." Die sighed softly and then shook his head, pushing himself up from the floor and gingerly exiting the shower stall. He made quick work of bandaging up his knee and then drying the rest of his body off. 

With that done, he picked up his beer and drained the rest, tossing that bottle in the trash as well. "I should go to bed before I get trashed... because I can feel it coming on. I'm not doing too well in the not obeying the urge department right now either."

Kyo sighed and stood up after Die, following him out and watching him bandage his knee. He looked at Die kind of sadly then nodded. "I think that's a good idea then." 

Tossing his towel in the hamper, he made his way to the bedroom and pulled on some boxers before getting under the sheets.

Die followed him in as well, though he just tossed his towel aside and crawled into bed. Curling up next to Kyo, he tugged him close and whispered, "I don't care how much pressure she puts down, I'm not giving her shit. If he is mine, I'll do my best to be a good father, but... it's going to have be separate households. I love you, and that will not change."

When Die got into bed, Kyo instantly curled against him. He nodded, a grim look on his face. "I appreciate that…" He shifted and looked up at Die, stroking his hand over his face. "I love you, Daisuke...and if that little boy is yours...then I'll love him, too."

Die nodded a little, burrowing his face against Kyo's neck after a moment. "Thank you," he offered quietly, not knowing what else to say on the subject, just knowing sleep would be uneasy until things were sorted out.

Kyo nodded and wrapped his arm around Die's waist, pulling him close and closing his eyes. He was already starting to drift off, the alcohol in his system helping him along, but even as he slid towards sleep, he uttered a silent prayer that this all worked out in the end.


	55. Chapter 55

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

The next few days were tiresome for Die in all honesty. He was run through four different clinics, getting the tests done for paternity, two of them swabs and two of them blood-based tests. It had taken a while for the tests to come back, and the lawyers to get ahold of the girl and make her turn up with the kid for testing as well. The names were passed back down to Die: the girl's name was Yamada Haruka, and the kid was Kazuo. The thing that Die had dreaded the most was that he recognized the name, and it definitely was one of the girls he had had sex with before leaving on that tour.

Now, he stood outside the lawyer’s office, puffing away at his e-cigarette in a nervous sort of fashion. He'd put on his pinstriped black suit and made sure his hair was presentable. He shuffled from foot-to-foot and reached to pinch the bridge of his nose. "God, I'm so scared."

Kyo had been with Die at every appointment, and now he was at the lawyers' with him. He was dressed up as well, though he'd stuck with a button down black shirt and black slacks. So far, his presence hadn't been questioned, and for that, he was thankful.

With a sigh, he looked up at his lover, his face grim. "I am, too, Die...but...what's done is done. It's not as if, if he's your kid, you can send him back to the storks."

Die huffed out a quiet laugh, though it wasn't nearly as merry as usual. Shaking his head, he murmured, "Not really, it's just that I... I know what I'll do, but I just..." he shook his head, "even at my stupidest, I was always careful, Kyo."

Kyo sat there quietly for a moment then looked up at Die, frowning slightly. "Even those times when you were so blitzed you couldn't remember your name?"

Die winced and looked away. "I hate to say it, but when I get that bad, I can't get my dick up, man. It's called whiskey dick for a reason."

Kyo snorted softly and shook his head. "I hope you're right...but there's always that 2% chance that something went wrong with the condom."

Die nodded a little and then tucked his e-cig away. Taking a deep breath, he muttered, "Well, it ain't gonna change for me standing out here. Here goes nothing."

Kyo nodded then stood, reaching out to grab Die's hand and give it a squeeze. "Good luck..."

For the first time since all this shit had rained down on them, Die did something he knew he could not regret. He pulled Kyo to him and hugged him tight, one hand lightly holding the back of his neck. "I love you, and don't you dare forget that."

Kyo gasped softly, not having expected Die to hug him like that. His arms were quick to wrap around his love and squeeze him tight. "I love you, too...always."

Die hesitated for one moment before tucking his finger under Kyo's chin and placing a relatively chaste kiss to his lips. He'd be damned if he was going to let anything get in the way of him and Kyo, and he would hold his head high and proud as he walked in. And only one thing was going to do that. 

Taking a step back, he smiled softly and then turned away, opening the door and stepping inside.

Kyo smiled at the kiss then took his place upon the bench again, watching as Die walked through the door and silently hoping that he didn't come out with a son.

Die closed the door behind him and took in a deep breath as he glanced over the woman sitting across the table. He recognized her, which meant he hadn't been completely bombed. His gaze flitted over to the child who was sitting across the table as well, and he took in the boy's features. He looked so much like Die it was nearly painful.

Offering a smile and trying to be amiable, Die gave a rather traditional bow to them, the child standing and giving him a bow back as well. The woman inclined her head and then let out a quiet sigh. "Can we get this over with?"

Die took his seat next to the lawyer that had been supplied by their management and smoothly crossed his legs, one over the other.

Both lawyers took out papers and traded them, dual sets of paternity tests being traded. Die's lawyer then pushed copies of all four over to Die, quickly highlighting the main point. Negative. The word glared up from the paper, and for an instant, Die was both relieved and saddened. This wasn't his fuck up, wasn't his mistake. But the sheer fact that he'd have thought of a kid like that made him upset. 

Shifting uncomfortably in his chair, he murmured, "Well, I guess that's that, isn't it?"

His lawyer placed his hand on Die's arm. "Stay. Now we debate what we want back for libel."

"For what?"

"Defamation of character. Selling a false story to the tabloid and smearing your good name."

Die pursed his lips and then straightened his shoulders. "I want to know your story, Haruka. I know I did sleep with you, and I make no bones about that. I remember it clearly. I can see your basis," he tapped the kid's age on the paper in front of him, "given the age of Kazuo here. But I want to know why you sold it to the papers rather than coming to me."

Haruka stared at him for a long moment and then sighed, waving her lawyer off when he tried to tell her to be quiet. "I honestly thought he was yours, Die. I mean... look at him." She gestured to Kazuo, and Die's eyes flicked over to him and then away again, nodding slightly. "I lost my job as a lawyer's assistant a few months ago and nowhere has hired me back so far. Got laid off with no warning. Last month we had a car accident and," she shifted, pulling up the side of her shirt, showing the giant healing gash up her side, "this happened, costing a fortune in medical bills. They offered me most of that in payment for the story, and... I took it. We've been short on food and everything else; we're nearly at eviction from our house. I just..." she shook her head and then bowed it, "I'm sorry, Die. I feel like a total bitch, and I feel even worse knowing that what I thought was the truth all these years wasn't."

Die pinched the bridge of his nose and then sat back, debating for a moment. "I'm not pressing forward any charges. Issue a statement back to the same tabloid and a few others, run it that says I am not the father, paternity tests proved it." He shifted his gaze to the child, who looked more than a little distraught. "And don't leave... I need a minute." With that, he got up, taking the papers with him and headed out the door. Stepping outside, he held the papers out to Kyo.

Kyo hadn't remained seated for very long, nerves pushing him to pace the corridor outside the office. He was lost in thoughts of what they would do if the child was Die's and by proxy his step-child of a sorts when the door opened, causing him to jump slightly. He spun around and saw it was Die, then noticed the papers being held out to him. Wordlessly, he took them and scanned over them, quickly finding the words he needed to see. When he was done, he glanced up at Die, looking over his lover's face, relief painting his own. "Was she just lying, or did she sincerely believe you were the boy's father?"

"She sincerely thought so... and I did sleep with her in the right timeframe, there is no dodging that. She's... Kyo she's in deep shit. They're both barely making it." He sighed. "Her priorities are straight; she just took a leap in the wrong direction. I'm not pressing charges; I'm making her retract everything she said. But, I... I feel bad just walking off somehow. I know it's not my problem, but I'm loathe to let that poor kid live like that. I don't know what to do."

Kyo listened to Die, his jaw working as he heard of the woman and child's plight. When Die had said his piece, he gave a huff then reached out, patting Die on the shoulder. "And what is it you'd like to do? Help them?"

Die gave a little nod. "At least the kid. It's not his fault, and you should have seen the look on his face. He looked so sad that I wasn't his father." He pushed his hands into his pockets. "He's been living in a dream world in which I am his father. Just... something. Helping her get a job... pulling some strings. That'd be the best. She was a lawyer's assistant. Got laid off and shit. It's not her fault, and she wasn't a bitch when I was with her."

Kyo nodded, crossing his arms. "I suppose that would be acceptable. I'm sure our lawyers could work something out somehow."

Die handed one of the papers over to Kyo. "Keep this." With that, he lightly touched the other's shoulder and then slipped back inside. He took his seat and studied them, "Is everything I've already said agreeable?"

Both Haruka and the lawyer nodded. "Yes, those terms are fair, and we thank you."

Die leaned forward on the table. "On a personal note, I would like to help you find a stable job. It'll give you a chance at getting back on your feet and frankly, it makes my conscience feel better." He looked right at Kazuo. "You may not be my child, but that doesn't mean I didn't see how you were looking at me." He shrugged a little. "Don't ever let it be said I'm a jerk."

Die's lawyer all but gaped at him. "Daisuke, these people tried to drag your name through the mud. And you're wanting to find her a job?"

Die lifted his hand and held it there for a moment. "I don't want any arguments on how I choose to run my personal life. At this point, the entire reason we are here is already solved; the rest is on me and what I choose to do."

His lawyer backed off, leaning back in his chair. "I'm not sure this is advisable, Daisuke."

"Your position is noted, thank you." Die leaned forward toward Haruka. "I want a resume by tomorrow, and if you can get a letter of reference from someone, I want that as well. I guarantee nothing, but I will try."

Haruka nodded and then whispered out a few grateful words in between the tears that were now threatening to stream from her eyes, though she was vigorously fighting them back. "I'm so sorry, Die. I really thought Kazuo was yours. I really did."

Die stood up and then murmured, "May I have a moment with Kazuo please?" He glanced at the kid, "If that's okay with you?

The kid nodded, and Die's lawyer stood up, though the other lawyer did not. "He's under legal age."

Die gave him a sincerely annoyed look. "I just want to talk to him for a moment, is that such a terrible thing?"

"The mother or I stay, period."

Haruka sighed. "I'll stay."

The second lawyer stood up and left the room as well.

Die then moved to Kazuo and knelt down, lightly touching his shoulder. "I just wanted you to know... I hold nothing negative against you on this. I'm sorry I didn't turn out to be your father, but don't let that define you. Don't let it get under your skin. You can be strong no matter who your father is, okay?" 

The kid nodded, and Die squeezed his shoulder before standing up. He glanced at Haruka. "Tomorrow, send everything through my lawyer." With that, he turned and left the room, the door quietly closing behind him.

Kyo stood up when Die came back out. He licked his lips then looked up at the other. "Are we finished?" he questioned, somewhat ready to get the hell out of there.

Die nodded. "We are." He glanced back at their lawyers and then stepped away toward the elevator. "Come on, let's... go get dinner or get drunk... or something." Honestly, Boss' sounded like more fun at the moment given what all could be done.

Kyo gave a slight nod to the lawyers then followed along with Die, thankful the car showed up quickly so they could get on it right away. "Sounds good to me."

Die slid into the car, settling down in the passenger seat rather than the driver's seat, waiting on Kyo to get in, intent to apologize that he wasn't going to drive.

Kyo followed Die out, glancing at his lover as he slid into the passenger seat. With a shrug, Kyo went around and got in on the driver's side, settling down and getting buckled.

The moment that they were away, Die sort of crumpled in his seat, his shoulders shaking for a few moments before he started to cry, not even remotely able to stop it, his hand pressed tightly over his mouth in an attempt to hold back the sobs.

Kyo had pulled out onto the road and gotten a few feet down when Die started to cry. Frowning, Kyo reached over to find Die's hand and squeeze it tight. "It's...it's okay baby...we're through this...."

Die just shook his head, grabbing ahold of Kyo's hand and clinging to it. "I-I," he couldn't manage any more than that and just let himself cry it out, shuddering slightly.

Kyo glanced around, finally choosing a decent pull-off and driving up behind a large supermarket. There, he parked the car and unbuckled before leaning over to hug Die.

Die reached for Kyo, clinging to him and just letting it all go, shaking slightly. It took him a few minutes before he was to the point where he could even talk again. He curled up against the seat and then murmured, "I'm so sorry... I'm so fucking sorry."

Kyo just rubbed Die's back the entire time, keeping a watch out for any other people that might come by. When Die spoke again, he just shook his head. "Shh, it's okay, Die. It would have been okay either way," he murmured.

"I always knew that my past might come back to bite me in the ass, but... what if it gets worse?" Die asked softly. "Like... I... I don't know."

Kyo leaned back a little to peer at Die's face. "Like what? You've been tested for everything under the sun..."

Die sniffed and nodded, mopping at his eyes and just generally looking very displeased.

Kyo sighed softly and hugged Die again, squeezing him tightly. "Do you want to just go home and order in or something?" he asked, feeling that maybe a public setting wasn't going to work well right then.

Die was quiet for a moment and then murmured, "I... can I be honest?"

Kyo cocked his head slightly then nodded. "Of course..."

"I just want to get lost... right now I don't care how. A bottle... something more. I know it's not healthy, and it's not a wise decision, but... there's my honesty." He sighed, wiping off his face one more time and wiping his thumb under his eyes before slinging the tears off into the floorboard.

Kyo pressed his lips together, a certain sadness in his eyes before he nodded again. "Alright..." With that, he shifted back into his seat and re-buckled, pulling out onto the road and heading towards the one place he knew Die could find his door to being lost.

Die leaned back in his seat and pressed both palms over his eyes. "I just... I can't right now. I'm not sure what I can't... but I can't."

Kyo just hummed softly, reaching over to pat Die's knee as he took turns and different streets. Soon enough, he was pulling up to a familiar house and parking in the driveway. "We're here..."

Die looked up when they stopped, glancing over at Kyo and then murmuring, "Are you sure you want to be remotely involved in this?"

Kyo shrugged slightly. It had been a long time since he'd been to Boss's for this purpose. "I'll go with you but...I don't know that I'll partake..."

With a nod, Die took off his seatbelt. "If you want no part... I can come back out in a few minutes? But... if you want to come, then... please?"

Kyo shook his head and got out with Die, going over to grasp his lover's hand. "C'mon, let's see what Boss has for an entryway to Wonderland..."

Die took his hand and headed for the door. He knocked a few times and then waited.

A few minutes passed, and then Boss opened the door, looking a bit shocked and then taking in Die's face. "Oh god, what's wrong?" He opened the door and ushered them in. "In, please. What... what's wrong?"

Kyo bowed to Boss when the elder opened the door then silently entered the man's house, immediately getting out of his shoes. "I'll let Die be the one to tell you, but it involved a lengthy meeting with lawyers this morning."

Boss' mouth opened a bit and he started between them. "Please tell me it's not you guys. Please. Not your relationship and not the band."

Die shook his head a little. "No... not that." He knelt down, untying his shoes, getting a bit frustrated with one before he finally got up and sighed. "Tabloid ran a thing about me having a child out of wedlock, and I was afraid they were right. Turns out they weren't, but I'm sort of... my brain is a fucking mess. I want out of the mess for a while. Here I am."

Boss looked between Die and Kyo, worry clear in his eyes. "Right... okay." He ushered Die and Kyo into his living room, leaving Die sitting on the couch. "Kyo, I wanted to show you something, come with me for a minute?"

Kyo followed them in, shaking his head when Boss inquired if it was them. He let Die answer, reaching over to rub his back as he talked. When Boss asked him to come with him, he nodded and gave Die's hand a squeeze. "Sure...what's up?"

Die remained on the couch, just hunched over, his face in his hands.

Once they were out of earshot, Boss led Kyo into his bedroom and pushed the door partway closed. "He's... he's not okay, is he?"

Kyo glanced at the door then back to Boss before sinking down on the bed and scrubbing his hands over his face. "No, no he really isn't...before this...or rather on top of this....he's started purging again. We've been trying to work through it, but it's been difficult."

Boss winced a little and then breathed in a soft hiss. "Fuck." He knelt down and put his hand on Kyo's knee. "And you? How are you holding up?"

Kyo let out a humorless laugh and shrugged. "I'm holding... the stress is eating a hole in my gut, but... I've yet to give in to the urge to cut it out. I just want him to get through this shit."

Boss squeezed Kyo's knee for a moment and then murmured, "You two do realize I am your one hundred percent confidential place to come talk about all this shit, right?" He frowned as he rubbed at the other's kneecap and then patted it. "I hate seeing my friends so stressed out they're... well..." he gestured toward the living room, "since when does Die do this?"

Kyo looked over at Boss and offered him a half-smile, reaching out clap his hand on his shoulder. "I know, and I appreciate it more than you can imagine," he stated before glancing towards the living room. "Die has been trying hard to keep from getting boozed up all the time...but right now, I think he needs a quick escape...quicker than booze could ever do."

Boss nodded a little. "Well... I've got... well," he eyed Kyo for a moment and then muttered, "You never saw this, any of it." He moved to the dresser and pulled out the bottom of the drawer and gestured his hand over the array. "A shit ton of things. Enough to get some major flack." He leaned against the edge of the dresser. "I'm trying to get some of it back out of here, pull it back down to... minor levels."

Kyo stood and moved over to the open drawer, his eyes widening at the sheer amount. "Holy shit, Boss...how'd you manage to get this much?" He looked over everything seeing baggies of familiar pills and some weed and even what he assumed was cocaine. Shaking his head, he reached into the drawer to pull out a set of small, white pills. "What are these?"

Boss heaved a sigh. "Friend dropped if off before he... uh... well, left the country. And he didn't bother coming back. I can't bring myself to flush this much money's worth of shit, but it's like... I could get some major time for it if anyone found out." He flicked the baggy. "E. Trust me; he doesn't want that right now." He sifted through some stuff and then sighed. "I'm almost afraid to give him anything more than weed, to be honest."

"Nice guy..." Kyo wrinkled his nose at the E then looked through the stuff before finally glancing at the weed. "That'd work for him but...I can't smoke it. Got anything in pill form that'll do the same?"

Boss grinned at him. "Oh, buddy... you don't have to smoke it. Neither does he. If you've got some time, I've got some mean baking skills." He rooted around and found the most potent batch he had, putting the false top back in the drawer and sliding it shut. "How do you feel about chocolate?"

Kyo titled his head then snorted. He hadn't been thinking about pot brownies or anything. "Chocolate's fine...we've really got all night...." He paused then held out his hand. "Thanks, Boss...I really appreciate you doing this...I know it's risky as fuck..."

Boss took his hand and just squeezed it. "I'd go to the ends of the earth for you guys, you have to know that by now." He touched Kyo's shoulder. "Um... you know... if he's having issues eating... you can always give him the munchies more for a while." He laughed softly and shrugged. "It's only sorta not legit."

Kyo smiled a bit and patted Boss's shoulder. "Thank you...and you know, I did kind of think of that. It would just be something to get his appetite up..."

He nodded a little. "You guys don't get random drug tests anymore, right?" He opened the door and ushered Kyo back out, closing the door behind himself and then heading toward the kitchen.

Kyo shook his head. "Not for a few years now...I guess they figured we've grown up enough..." He followed Boss back out then diverted to the living room to go sit with Die, looping his arm around Die's shoulders.

"Boss is gonna fix us something...special."

Die had obviously had another crying jag by the time Kyo was back with him, his face sort of splotchy and his eyes bloodshot. He sniffed a little and pushed his suit jacket off, curling up against Kyo's side without a word.

Kyo waited for Die to get his jacket off then pulled him close and held him tightly, leaning down to kiss the top of his head.

Die clung to Kyo's side, his head bowed and his fingers tight on his lover's clothing, as if letting him go would be a huge mistake. "I'm sorry," he whispered out again.

Kyo held Die tighter, shaking his head. "Stop apologizing, Die...it's okay...I promise."

"It's not okay... I... I'm bringing hell down on us, Kyo. And it's all my fault. All me. I'm ruining everything with my past." A new hot wave of tears slid down his cheeks, rushing to wet the collar of his already partly drenched shirt.

Kyo pursed his lips then shook his head, squeezing Die. "Die...," he paused, not sure what to say to calm Die down. He thought for a moment then sighed, pulling out his phone and texting Boss rather than yell at him across the house. "Could you bring Die some strong whiskey, please?" He realized that was a bit silly, but figured Boss would understand. 

Shifting, he moved his hand to stroke over Die's face, pushing his hair out of it. "Your past doesn't matter anymore, love."

A few more seconds passed and then Die was practically pushing Kyo over onto the couch, his lips harsh against Kyo's own, his hands shaking as he simply randomly grabbed at Kyo, the entire kiss a huge mess, nothing about Die's normal state of sexual being around in this presentation.

Kyo kind of flailed ungracefully as Die pushed him over. He was very confused about this turn of events and after a moment, he grasped Die's shoulders, pushing him up slightly. "Daisuke....what on earth??"

Die looked nearly desperate, wild-eyed and... most of all, scared. He let out a loud whine when Kyo pushed him back from him and after making one more feeble attempt, he backed off, slinking to the other side of the couch and curling in on himself.

Kyo just stared when Die finally pushed off of him. He seriously considered hauling Die to the emergency room or something because his boyfriend was clearly not right at the moment. He sat there then moved, reaching out to stroke his hand over Die's arm. "Die...baby..." He was at a complete loss as of to what to do.

Die curled in more on himself and shook his head. "Bad person... I'm a bad person," he muttered out, his fingers plucking at his shirt incessantly, little huffs of breath ghosting past his lips every few seconds. "Bad, bad person."

Boss reappeared in the room, taking one look between Kyo and Die, hearing the mumbling coming from him and he pointed at Kyo. "Don't touch." Darting out of the room, he made a mad dash for the bedroom and then into his bathroom. He came out a few moments later with a pill bottle and some water, the whiskey forgotten on the counter in the bathroom.

Kneeling in front of Die, he hissed out, "Hey, fucker... look at me."

Die's head snapped up, and he stared at Boss, his eyes full of sadness. 

"Take this." Boss pushed the pill into his hand and then the glass of water.

Kyo watched with abject horror as Die started mumbling. Fear settled in the pit of his stomach as he witnessed what he was sure was going to be the end of Die's sanity. When Boss showed up, Kyo just looked up at him wide-eyed, his breathing coming a little too fast. "What...," he cut off when Boss took off again. 

Their friend was back soon enough with a pill bottle and he watched as the pill was pressed into Die's hand, wondering if his lover had enough sense to take the damn thing.

Die stared at the pill for a long few moments and then muttered something incoherently, finally putting the pill in his mouth and just sitting there with it, refusing to take the water and looking disgruntled when Boss tried to ply it on him a second time.

Shifting back, Boss settled on the edge of the coffee table and reached to take Kyo's hand. "Let him be for a minute... just... give it time." He sighed and glanced over at Kyo. "Does he not keep the meds on him anymore?"

Kyo sighed softly when Die finally took the pill. He looked over at Boss, squeezing the elder's hand then looking confused. "The medi-..oh...no, he quit. I used to try to get him to keep one in his wallet but I just gave up. He hasn't needed them," he answered, his tone a bit shaky and gruff.

Boss nodded and then shook his head. "Idiot... him, not you. He had to know this was gonna do it." He reached to lightly rub his hand through Kyo's hair, trying to refocus the other man a little bit, give him something to deal with other than Die's currently rocking form on the other end of the couch.

Kyo huffed out a sigh then shifted, leaning into Boss's touch, appreciating it. Very few people were allowed to touch him in such a manner, but he trusted Boss. The man was sort of a big brother to all of them, really.

The oven dinged in the other room, and Boss stood, lightly tugging Kyo's shirt. "Let him be; that's gonna dumb him out something terrible for a few minutes." He picked up the bottle and tucked it into his pocket, walking around the back of the couch and waiting.

Kyo glanced up at the ding then nodded, standing to follow Boss after looking at Die once more. 

When they got into the kitchen, the scent of brownies hit him, and his stomach gave a growl, causing him to wince slightly. "We were actually going to go get dinner..."

"Oh... you'll want dinner after this," Boss murmured as he fished out oven mitts and pulled the brownies from the oven. "Though I'm starting to think this is more for your end than his at this point." He glanced back toward the living room. "I'm going to give you some of my anxiety pills, and you're going to keep them for him. Because that boy..." he shook his head, "is knee deep in his shitpile right now."

Kyo snorted and nodded. "Yeah, I think you're right..." He sniffed then settled against the counter, his arms crossed. "I'm glad you've got some to spare....he's probably going to need them again."

Boss fished out a baggy after he'd put the brownies down and then poured a few of his pills into it, handing it over to Kyo. "No more than three per day. If he wigs out more than that, he needs to get to the doctor. He used to be a classic re-set sort of case though... let's hope on that." He sighed and shook his head. "How is it that the Gods plunked you two down on my doorstep just in time? If you'd gone anywhere else, you'd be in the ER right now."

Kyo took the pills, and stuffed them into his pocket before pushing his hand through his hair with a sigh. "I got it. He might need to go anyway...." He shifted on his feet then let out a laugh. "I have no idea...but thankfully, we were here. The last thing we need is another tabloid going on about Die breaking down in public."

Boss nodded and then pulled out a spoon, dipping it into the half-cooled brownie and scooping some out, holding it out to Kyo. "Here... you calm down first. Then we can deal with him again." He glanced toward the living room, noting Die was idly pushing his finger in and out of his mouth and wincing. "You stay here." With that, he headed out of the room and leaned over the back of the couch. "Boy... if you puke on my sofa on purpose, I will rub your face in it."

Die lifted his head, giving Boss a bleary look before he huffed out a sigh and pulled his finger out from between his lips, staring down at it for a moment and then showing Boss his tongue with a quiet, "Eww."

Rolling his eyes, Boss pointed at the coffee table where he'd left the water. "Drink that. You're not two years old." 

Die reached for it and picked it up, taking a few sips and then putting it back down, making a face. 

Boss snapped his fingers, and Die turned to look at him again. "Are you with me yet?" Still a glazed over look on Die's face. Boss sighed. "Right... five more minutes in the good 'ol bake-the-brains-oven for you, then." He walked back into the kitchen and leaned on the counter. "He's got a good case of the dumbs out of this one. He'll be back with us after this commercial break."

Kyo took the piece of brownie and ate it, finding that Boss was indeed quite capable of baking. He gave a nodded of his head and moved around, getting another bite. "Thanks."

Boss sighed softly and shook his head a little. "Think nothing of it. You two are some of my closest friends." He moved beside Kyo and picked up his own spoon, taking a few bites of the brownie and smirking. "Great, I didn't overdo it." He leaned back and leveled his gaze on Die, who was now just sitting there with his chin on his knees, legs pulled up on the couch, his eyes closed while he hummed softly to himself. "I don't mean to seem like a dick, dragging you away from him, but he just didn't need to stress you out any more than he did, and frankly, I usually just need to be left alone once the pill is in me and checked in on every few minutes until I'm back from wherever my brain decided to deliver me to." He pushed one hand into his pocket and shrugged. "You gotta pull yourself out of that net, you know?"

Kyo glanced towards the living then shook his head. "I don't think you're a dick at all. I'm glad there's someone who knows what the hell to do. I wasn't doing a very good job of it." He ate yet another bite then scratched his nose. "I get that he has to come out on his own....I've just never seen him have one so bad..."

Boss let out a soft grunt. "That was... well... bad news." He took a bite of the brownie as well and then ditched the spoon in the sink, putting a fresh one in it. "I suspect he's been halfway in it for a few days now and just thought he could come out the other end or something."

A soft sneeze came from the other room, followed by the sound of Die blowing his nose, and the couch creaking as he lay down on it.

Kyo hummed then shifted to lean on the counter more. "Well, there was also that interviewer that pushed him about relationships, and that started it...he started purging after that. Then, just when I think he's getting better...we get that call..." Kyo paused then looked at Boss, an odd expression on his face. "I...halfway wonder if maybe he was hoping that boy was his...like his one chance to have a biological child or something..."

Boss sucked in a breath through his teeth and shook his head. "Dangerous territory there, buddy." He shook his head. "You have two options on that. Outright ask him, or just fuckin' forget the thought ever happened." Shaking his head, he gazed toward the living room. "I can't tell you what's going on in the dear head of his, but I can tell you for him to get to that point in that matter of time from him walking in the door to when he did it, there's all manner of fuckery going on up there."

Kyo bit his lip and nodded, hanging his head. "Yeah, I don't think I'll bring it up...I mean...he'd probably flip again." Rubbing his forehead, Kyo just shrugged and got more brownie, the effects slowly starting to show up.

A soft thud came from the living room and then Die popped up over the edge of the couch. "I'm good... I'm good... rolled in the fucking floor." There was a grunt and then the sound of Die trudging off down the hallway. The toilet lid went up and then the sound of him urinating came through the house.

Boss glanced at Kyo and then huffed out a little laugh. "Look who's back." He leaned to Kyo and took his head in his hands, lightly rubbing the locks of hair and then shaking his head. "The pair of you and your hair, I swear it... no idea what you did. Now... buck up, let this shit hit you hard on your ass, veg on my couch, and I'm going to go get us all some takeout. Nice, horrible for us, carbo-loading take-out."

Kyo jumped when he heard the thud, then snorted as Die spoke up. He couldn't deny the relief he felt when he realized that Die was back on planet Earth. 

He looked at Boss and grinned before shaking his head. "Sounds good...I want something with fried cheese of some kind." He grabbed one last bite of brownie, turned to go in the living room then stopped and looked at Boss. "Weird question...but uh...you got some sweats I could borrow? I'm uncomfortable as fuck."

Boss smirked and then nodded. "Drawer up from the drawer. Whatever fits you, have at." He shifted slightly and then gestured. "Him too, probably, that looks like a terrible ass suit. And... just sayin', I'll be gone for at least half an hour for you if.. you know, that kind of thing helps him." With that, he slipped around Kyo and headed for the front door. "Be back in a bit."

Die finished up in the bathroom, flushing, zipping up, putting the lid back down, and then starting to wash his hands and face.

Kyo nodded then waved. "Thanks again...see you later." He stood there for a moment, definitely feeling a bit less than sober, and as he thought of it, he laughed then laughed at himself for laughing. Shaking his head, he headed down the hall into Boss's bedroom, going to his dresser. After digging around for a bit, he found one of their band tees and a pair of yoga pants that he wasn't entirely sure didn't belong to a woman. Shrugging, he dug a little more and found a decent pair of track pants that he thought would fit Die and a Chrome Hearts tank top, which he found fitting. 

With his finds in hand, he wandered down the hall and knocked on the bathroom door frame. "Hey...."

Die was simply standing there, leaning over the sink, staring into the mirror when Kyo appeared. He turned to look at him and then gave him a little smile, ducking his head. "I put on a scene... shouldn't have done that."

Kyo snorted then clumsily tossed him the clothes he'd found. "It happens...change into that stuff." He moved into the bathroom, pausing to press his lips to Die's shoulder before unceremoniously stripping down to just his boxers. He held up the yoga pants and inspected them before setting them aside to open the toilet. "Gotta piss....bad."

Die caught the clothing, though he stared at it sort of disorientedly for a few moments before shrugging and putting it on the counter, starting to unbutton his shirt. He glanced at Kyo and then at the door, finally pushing it closed with his hip and slowly continuing to unbutton the pesky shirt.

Kyo glanced back at the door closing and laughed. "Boss left to get food. Said he'd be gone a while..." He fished his dick out and leaned over the toilet, waiting for nature to take its course.

Die let out a low grumble of sound and then shifted closer, kneeling down in pretense of taking off his socks, though it was probably more obvious than he wanted it to be that he was just getting a new and better angle on the situation.

Kyo smirked to himself when Die kneeled down near him. He backed up and pushed his boxers down to the floor before leaning over the toilet again, his hand unmistakably stroking up and down his length as he did. He held it in for a bit longer then, when he couldn't stand it, he groaned and started pissing. "Hnn..."

Die sat there for a few moments, watching from the corner of his eye and then finally, he just gave in, full-on staring for a few seconds before pushing himself up again and putting his socks on the counter, quickly starting to unfasten his pants. "Hey," he murmured quietly, "I'm sorry about like... whatever the hell that was earlier, I had no right."

Kyo stood there pissing for a min, glancing in the mirror at Die the grunting. "It's all good...you were not...with yourself."

Die gave a little nod and then muttered, "Still... wasn't right of me." He finally got the shirt off and Boss' shirt on, moving to work at his pants, unfastening them and pushing them down his long legs, hopping around to get out of the second leg before finally leaning against the wall to pull the new pants on.

Kyo finished up with pissing and shook off before bending over to tug his boxers up. He moved to the sink and shrugged. "I know...it's okay." He smiled and rinsed his hands before grabbing the yoga pants, pulling them on and then the t-shirt. Both things were a size or so big on him and they hung off of him.

Die tugged the shirt on as well and then shifted slightly. "So he says he'll be gone for a while?" he asked softly, looking more than a little embarrassed as he sort of piled his clothing up on the counter.

Kyo licked his lips and nodded. "Yep...a while..."

Die shifted from foot-to-foot for a moment and then gave a nod. "To get food?" He opened the bathroom door and padded out into the hallway, one hand up in his hair, tugging lightly, toying with the short strands in a half-frustrated sort of way.

Kyo cleared his throat, watching Die leave the bathroom then following him. "Yep...something unhealthy for us to veg on...."

A little sound bubbled up from Die's throat, his eyes casting this way and that, from one end of the hallway to the other and then he turned - at long last - and headed for the living room, his steps shuffled more than his usual confident lift-and-place of each foot. He avoided the couch, as though it contained memories of what he'd just done there, and instead seated himself on the floor, knees drawn up, and his chin resting on top, a soft sort of lost look on his face.

Kyo watched as Die settled on the floor, almost groaning aloud. He licked his lips and knelt in front of his lover, his hands on his knees. He pushed Die's legs apart and moved between them to cup the other's face, stroking his cheek with his thumb. "Baby..."

Die looked up at him and murmured out a soft, "Hmm?"

Kyo leaned in to peck Die's lips softly. "You're all over the place...," he murmured, his hand resting on Die's chest. "I know what you need... and it's okay."

The smallest of sighs slid from between Die's lips, and he reached for Kyo, pulling him close and just resting his forehead against Kyo's own, his eyelids fluttering closed. "Just hold me... it'll work."

Kyo hummed and wrapped his arms around Die, holding him tight. He tilted his head a bit to get at Die's neck, pressing his lips there. "If you think so, then okay."

Die shifted enough to pull Kyo nearly flush against him. "I know I've spent all damn day apologizing, but I really need to get my point across here. I'm honestly horrified that I did what I did to you earlier. I know I wasn't in my right mindset, but that was unacceptable no matter who I am or what was wrong."

Kyo stroked his hand over Die's face, shaking his head. "It's honestly fine, Daisuke. I understand that you weren't your usual self."

Pursing his lips a little, Die nodded and then reached up to push his hand into Kyo's hair, idly playing with it. His heart raced in his chest and he shuddered slightly. "Do I smell brownies?"

Kyo sighed softly, closing his eyes as Die played with his hair, finding it to be quite nice. "Mmm, yes. Boss made special brownies...they're.....yummy."

Die let out a little sigh and then pulled on Kyo's hair. "I love you."

Kyo couldn't help the little groan that escaped at the hair pull. He quickly lifted his head and kissed Die deeply, smiling at him. "I love you, too, Koi...now let's have some brownies, yes?" With that, he pushed himself to his feet, holding out his hand for Die.

Die nodded a little and pulled himself up with Kyo's hand. He padded along toward the kitchen, sniffing a little and then spying the entire tray and the spoon Boss had left it there. He grinned as he reached for the spoon and scooped out a bunch, eating it off the spoon with a soft groan.

Kyo followed along and grinned, going for another good bite himself. "Best fucking brownie ever..."

Die didn't talk, he just started to munch on the brownie, spoonful after spoonful, licking at the spoon in between and making strange little pleased sounds.

Kyo watched Die for a minute then moved around to stand behind Die, wrapping his arms around his waist, hands rest low on his stomach. "Slow down, angel, the brownies aren't going anywhere."

"It's the best damn thing I've eaten in months," he returned, looking a bit embarrassed and then putting the spoon down on the counter.

Kyo laughed and stood on his tiptoes to nuzzle the back of Die's neck, his high settling in and making him cuddly and well, horny. "Mmm, the best thing I've eaten in months is you..."

Die flushed slightly, his cheeks going pink. After a moment, he licked his lips and then reached back to lightly rub over Kyo's side. A low rumble of a chuckle left him, and he purred out, "Want some icing with your brownie?"

Kyo nipped the back of Die's neck and laughed lowly, molding himself to Die's back. "Mmm...I already ate my brownie but I don't mind getting the icing directly from the source..."

It only took a few seconds before Die turned around and backed Kyo up against the counter, one hand shoved in his hair, tugging his head back a bit viciously. He rubbed himself against him a little and let out a groan. "Shit... what the hell else is in these?" he breathed out.

Kyo groaned as he was pushed against the counter, his hands resting on either side of him as his hips bucked up against Die. "Hnng..fuck if I know...but I'm already damn near fully hard."

"I can fix that," Die breathed out, sliding down to his knees and pulling the other's borrowed pants down below his cock, revealing the other's erection to his gaze. He groaned, leaning in without hesitation and took him in his mouth, one hand holding the counter, the other grabbing his lover's ass a bit harshly.

Kyo let out a snort and then moaned as he was exposed to the air, his cock giving a twitch. Die's mouth descended on him, and he let out too loud of a cry, one hand going to fist in Die's hair. "Fucking...hnng Die!"

Nothing - absolutely nothing - was going to deter Die from what he was doing. He sat there on his knees, sucking and bobbing his head, more than a little bit pleased with the feeling of the other's cock on his tongue. He let out little grunts and moans every few seconds, squeezing Kyo's ass cheek and then sliding his hand into his pants instead.

Kyo's head dropped back, his hips bucking into Die's mouth as a near continuous stream of vulgarities spilled from his lips. "Fucking...fuck...Daisuke…yes, suck my fucking cock!"

The way the other was talking, the loudness and the fact that he was quite literally being the dirtiest mouthed person Die had ever heard during sex was turning him on something fierce. He let out another groan and continued bobbing his head.

A few more obscenities and minutes later, Kyo grasped the back of Die's head and pushed him down so that his nose was buried in the hair at the base of Kyo's cock. He gave one last thrust of his hips and then started cumming down Die's throat with a loud grunt, his body shuddering. After the first couple of spurts, he released Die, leaving it up to his lover where the other went. "Fuck yes!"

Die was glad of the fact that he'd taken Kyo enough to judge what he was going to do and when. The moment the other shoved his head down on his dick, he let out a muffled sound around him. With a groan, he pulled back when Kyo let him go, keeping his mouth open and letting Kyo shoot directly into his mouth.

Kyo reached down to milk himself of the last few drops, giving Die a dirty smirk as he smeared the head of his cock of his lover's lips. "Hnng...fucking sexy..."

Tilting his head back, Die showed him the mouthful of cum he had and then closed his mouth, swallowing it. He pushed himself up and then scooped up more brownie, eating it off the spoon and making a tiny face, laughing. "Simultaneously the best icing and not." He leaned back and licked his lips, gathering up another bite. "I'm dyin' here, man."

Kyo laughed and stood there for a moment, catching his breath before finally tugging up his pants. He gave Die a look and smirked, licking his lips before grabbing another bite of brownie. "Whatcha want me to do about it?"

"Get on your knees and fix it," he returned, smirking slightly.

Kyo chuckled lowly as he moved in front of Die and slowly slid to his knees, taking the other's pants with him. He flicked his eyes up at his lover as he reached out and grasped the base of his cock, leaning in to take every inch of him in and down his throat with a moan.

Die let out a groan the moment that Kyo grabbed his pants and began on his way down to his knees. "Oh fuck yeah... I like where this is going," he muttered out, his hips jerking when the other grasped his cock. And then his dick was down Kyo's throat, and his eyes rolled back in his head.

Kyo's hands moved to grasp each of Die's hips as he began bobbing his head, groaning around his lover's dick. Every once in a while, he'd let his teeth catch the underside, bringing an element of pain and surprise to his actions.

Die let out a loud groan, reaching to grasp his lover's hair, pulling on it a bit harshly. "Hnnggg, shit baby, yes. Suck it hard."

Kyo did just that, giving it his all, his nails digging tightly into Die's hips. "Mnng!"

Die fished up another spoonful of the brownie and slowly began to lick it, one hand in Kyo's hair, the other holding the spoon steady, his eyes narrowed down to slits as he simply felt what Kyo was doing to him. Lightly pulling on Kyo's hair, he murmured, "Stroke it for a moment."

Kyo flicked his eyes up then pulled off of Die's cock, licking the bit of precum on his lips as he slid his hand down to stroke Die.

"Jerk it fast," Die whispered out, his hips canting slightly as he stuck the spoon in his mouth and tilted his head back. "Sloppy... fuckin' loud. I wanna hear it."

Kyo chuckled lowly. "Mm, dirty..." He shifted forward a bit and let a glop of saliva drop on Die's cock before sliding his hand over it, picking up the pace quickly so that it was definitely sloppy and loud. "Like that, baby?"

Die let out a loud moan and then shuddered slightly, his hips pushing toward Kyo's hand, his eyes on the other's movements. "Holy fuck, man. Your hand looks so fuckin' hot on my dick."

There was a cough from the doorway and then a soft chuckle. "Well if that isn't one of the most erotic things I've ever seen, I have no idea what is," Boss backed up and held his hands up. "Leaving. Leaving. Sorry." With that, he turned and started back toward the living room.

Kyo groaned then jerked his head around at the couch, staring at Boss but not slowing his hand. He gave a snort and shook his head, looking back up at Die with a shrug.

Die arched an eyebrow at the other man and then let out a little chuckle. He wasn't going to call him back, but he didn't care that he'd seen either. "Suck me again, baby," he whispered, "I'm close."

Kyo smirked and leaned in, going back to sucking Die off, though he was a bit louder with his moans this time.

"Oh gods," Die breathed out, grasping the counter with both hands, his hips starting to move as Kyo started to bob his head again. "Oh fuck, god, you should suck my dick more often." He stared down at Kyo, seeing his lips wrapped around him, the way his mouth looked around a cock. "And in the light," he breathed out.

Kyo grunted, pulling his head back to swirl his tongue around the tip before engulfing Die with his mouth again, his hand going to cup and roll Die's balls, giving them a squeeze.

"Wait... wait," Die murmured quietly, patting around at his pockets and then groaning. "Man... when I want to, it's not even there." He lightly caressed Kyo's hair and then cupped his cheek. "Go on, it's okay."

Kyo stopped then smirked around Die's cock, shaking his head as he carried out, making the loudest slurping sounds he could.

Die closed his eyes, sliding his hips forward and then finally holding Kyo's hair hard enough to hold him still, starting to buck into his mouth. "Oh fuck, baby... I'm gonna lose it... where do you want it?"

The vocalist moaned as Die fucked his mouth. At the question, he just shrugged his shoulders, not really caring where it went.

"Then I'll paint your pretty face," he whispered softly. Die spread his legs a little more and then plunged in deep a few times, pulling out as he started to cum, a shudder sliding through his body as his released rained down over his lips and nose, some on his cheek.

Kyo shivered and let Die fuck his throat before simply gazing up at him, lips parted. He let out a pleased moan as Die's cum landed on his face, smirking and he licked his lips. "Mmm, best damn icing....'

Die huffed out a little laugh, shifting forward and rubbing the head of his cock on Kyo's tongue. "Isn't it?" he whispered softly. "Stay like this? I want to capture this," he purred out.

Kyo hummed then nodded. "That's fine with me..."

Pulling back, Die pulled his pants back up, his dick still partly hard in his pants, but he didn't seem to care. Wandering off to the bathroom, he came back a minute later, his phone in hand. He leaned back against the counter and pulled up his camera application, taking a few pictures of Kyo's face coated in his cum. Squatting down, he took hold of his chin and leaned in, licking it off his cheek and then releasing him. "My cum tastes... different." Perhaps a bit too much information on how often he tasted it.

Kyo pulled a few faces while Die took his pictures then laughed, licking his lips. "Mmm, it's been sweeter lately..." He stood and went over to the sink, getting a paper towel and wetting it to clean up his face with. He washed his hands after then tossed the towel in the trash before come back over to Die, his hand groping him blatantly. "We should go see what Boss brought us for food...I'm starving."

Die groaned, pushing his hips toward Kyo's hand. He grabbed the other's ass again and groped hard. "Mmm... we should... and yes, baby... I'm still hard. Boss put the good shit in here, didn't he?" He huffed out a laugh. "Fucker knows..."

Kyo chuckled and leaned in, grinding against Die's thigh for a moment to show that he was affected in the same way. "Yes, he did..."

"Not gonna complain," Die returned softly, tipping Kyo's chin up and kissing him on the lips ever so softly. "I love you, you sexy fuck."

Kyo smirked and kissed Die back, stroking his cheek for a moment. "And I love you." He gave Die's ass a pat then pulled away, heading for the living room as his stomach gave a loud growl.

Die picked up the brownie and followed into the living room, plopping down on the couch between Kyo and Boss, looking between them. After a moment, he chuckled and offered, "I just came all over his face, in case you were wondering."

Boss sputtered slightly, coughing and then chuckling. "Thank you for that, Daisuke." He reached to pat his thigh, took note of his boner, and pulled his hand away. "Woah there, boy, Jesus."

Kyo gave Die a look then laughed at Boss's reaction, shrugging. "You can see to him while I stuff my face if you want." He was grinning the entire time as he leaned forward and picked up one of the food containers, digging into the cheese sticks inside. "Oh my fucking God, yes!" he groaned out around a mouthful. "This is like heaven..."

Boss looked between the pair of them and then shook his head. "Remind me next time to not get so heavy handed with the weed, damn boys. It's like a fucking aphrodisiac for the pair of you." He picked up a double cheeseburger with all the fixings and placed it on Die's lap. "Eat this. I wanna see you get messy in it." He stared right at Die and leveled his gaze. "It's my kink."

Die debated if he was serious for a moment and then burst out laughing, picking up the burger and unwrapping it, taking a bite and moaning. "Oh my god, what did you do, go to crack heaven?"

Kyo nearly choked from laughing at Boss. "Fucking hell Boss, that's one helluva a messy kink!" He grinned then reached into another container, coming out with a cheeseburger of his own and chowing down, ecstatic moans issuing from him.

Boss grinned and then reached for the spoon, scooping up some brownie and shoving it in his mouth without a second thought.

Die watched him do that and then stared between the spoon and Boss and then at Kyo. "Um..."

Kyo stopped mid-bite and stared wide-eyed at Boss before putting down his burger, swallowing then sniggering. "Oh man...."

Boss slowly pulled the spoon out from between his lips and then swallowed. Rolling his eyes, he pushed his tongue against the front of his lips, pushing the skin out from his teeth for a moment before snorting. "Okay, who licked this after licking cock? Not that this is by far the worst thing I've ever put in my mouth, but Jesus."

Die choked on a laugh and looked away. "Kyo's... you just so totally ate Kyo's cum and my fucking spit."

Kyo leered at Boss. "How was it, eh? Like my cum, Boss? Or would you rather a better taste?"

Die lounged back on the couch, watching Kyo, a little smirk on his face. So his baby got mouthy when he got high; that was relatively exciting.

Boss picked up a cheese stick and slowly slid it between his lips. After a moment, he ate it and then licked his lips. "You are aware I'm actually one hundred percent into men, right? Like... not my first ballgame here."

Kyo licked his lips and smirked. "Can't say I've considered which team you're on, but now that you mention it...yeah..." He paused for a minute then laughed. "Why the fuck didn't you beat…or fuck, for that matter.. some sense into Kaoru then?? We'd have avoided tons of conflict."

Boss sat back and crossed one leg over the other, suddenly rather serious. "The truth? If you're sober enough to handle it... is that it's because I've always harbored a sort of... thing for him." He shrugged. "And him being an asshole about everyone else's sexuality kept me from ever actually telling him what team I'm on. And now he and Toshiya are happy, and I refuse to step anywhere in that."

Kyo was giggling but he stopped and sobered up as Boss spoke. Running his fingers through his hair, he winced a little. "Hey man, that...really fucking sucks...like...a lot." He leaned over and patted Boss on the shoulder, shaking his head.

"It's life, that's basically what it is." Boss shrugged slightly. "Now... if we're off the serious bullshit, then... since we're talking about it, boy what have you been eating?"

Die hacked out a laugh at the last comment, some ketchup smeared across his lower lip from his burger as he leaned forward. "My dick."

Kyo snorted and shrugged, giving Boss a look that said "it's true" before grinning. "His cum...those brownies...this burger...and cheesesticks...why do you ask?"

Boss smirked. "Because even from the small amount on the spoon, I can taste you." He looked between the pair and gave them a sort of sexy look before reaching to pick up his own container, which happened to have American style nachos in it, setting about crunching down on a few.

Die crossed his legs on the couch, reaching down to yank himself around since his dick was still about half hard and rather irritating in these pants. "That's because he tastes like pure sin."

Kyo gazed at the two of them for a moment then squirmed around, an image of the two of them sucking him off making his dick twitch in his pants. He opened his mouth to suggest but then decided that given Die's current mental issues, perhaps right then wasn't the best of times. He closed his mouth and licked his lips before standing up. "Gonna get us some drinks...," he informed, heading for the kitchen, the tent in his pants very obvious.

Die watched his lover walk off, his interest in the vocalist's pants very obvious. He turned back and licked his lips, getting the ketchup off and then eating a few more bites before murmuring, "He's so fuckin' turned on... I love it." He sniffed slightly, glancing at the brownie tray. "Sorry about the spoon, bro."

Boss let out a chuckle. "It's fine. I'm serious, not the worst thing I've ever had in my mouth, trust me." He smirked. "Besides, I got part of the show on accident anyway."

Kyo came back with Cokes after a few minutes, handing one to each of them. "I figured beer wouldn't mix well...." He popped his open and took a drink before smirking at Boss. "So, what is the nastiest thing you've had in your mouth?"

"Are we talking legit nasty or like... sexually deviant?" Boss arched an eyebrow at him. "Two different things."

Kyo smirked. "Sexually deviant...I don't want to know what kind of nasty shit you've been eating..."

"Well, let's top that list with the one time I got a little too high and ate pussy. Second down the list... a few men I'm not proud of and am damn lucky things didn't... go wrong from that. And third..." he hesitated there and then, finally, "piss." He shrugged. "Things you do for someone you're with that likes things, that's all. Doesn't taste great though."

Die nearly choked on his soda when the other mentioned piss, his face heating up in a manner that was nearly a dead giveaway on his own tendencies.

Kyo very smoothly elbowed Die in the ribs when he choked then shook his head. "Our lists sound about the same....what about the best you've ever tasted? Like the best salad you've ever tossed?"

Boss tilted his head a little. "Rimming's not really my deal, don't mind having it done, but not big on the giving end. But... there was this amazing son of a bitch I fucked twice and his dick... oh man... I could have sucked that all day."

Die grinned a little and reached over to grab Kyo's dick and then pulled his hand back.

Kyo let out half a moan before he could cut it off, his hips jerking up of their own volition. "Fuck Die..." He cleared his throat then shrugged. "I'm all about oral...though...mind you...I don't rim just anyone but...I will let a few people do it to me."

Die really liked this. He was being incredibly open, and he felt like he was delving into the depths of Kyo's perverse nature with the whole discussion, despite never opening his mouth at all. He put the other half of his burger down and shifted to press against Kyo, sliding his hand into Kyo's pants and just grasping his dick, more interested in that for the moment.

Boss politely ignored Die's mobile hands and simply continued the conversation. "It does feel nice. Under the right circumstances." He picked up another cheese stick and chewed it, looking thoughtful for a moment. Once he'd swallowed, he questioned, "You say your list is about the same as mine? Don't like the pussy?"

When Die's hand slid down his pants, he lost all interest in trying to eat. He leaned forward to set his food aside then reached over to grope Die before answering Boss. "Not particularly....I tried a few on, but they never really did it for me like sliding into a nice tight ass." He smirked a bit then nodded towards Die. "And nothing in this world feels like his..."

Die flushed slightly at Kyo's comment and his prowling fingers. He lightly pushed Kyo's fingers away and tugged him so he was pressed in his lap, starting to move his hand on Kyo's cock, though it was slow and built to tease.

Boss chuckled. "I wouldn't begin to know on that end." He shrugged, the admission easy. "And the uh... third part? Was that the same, too?" This time he cast a curious glance at Kyo's face.

Kyo grunted as he was pulled into Die's lap, flushing when he blatantly started stroking him off. He took a moment, finally letting out a soft laugh and nodding. "Yeah, it was piss...." His eyes flicked from Boss's face to Die, a slight smirk playing on his lips.

"Sterile, but too... strange," Boss admitted, shrugging a little and then glancing at Die, a slight look of surprise on his face before he looked away again. "And your kink? The one thing that gets you off harder than anything else?" Boss leaned forward, scooping up more brownie and eating it.

Die flushed slightly, shifting, but continuing to stroke Kyo off, his own erection pressing firmly against Kyo's rear end.

Kyo pushed his ass down, grinding against Die with a soft groan. "Ahh…that should be obvious, Boss...." He tugged his shirt up then just pulled it off before running his hand over the scars on his chest. "I like to bleed..."

Boss let out a quiet chuckle, "A man has to ask, given the chance." He let his eyes linger on Kyo's torso, being offered the other's body to look at like this. He smirked a bit, his eyes sliding down to what Die was doing in Kyo's pants, and then he looked away again. "I really need to say this. I love how completely nonchalant you are being about the fact that our lovely Daisuke has his hand shoved down your pants."

Die let out a quiet laugh, leaning in to lick at Kyo's shoulder. "You're the motherfucker who gave us the fucking horny weed."

Kyo smirked, basking in the way Boss was looking at him. He jerked his hips up, his hand sliding down over his tattoo before reaching back to tug at Die's hair. "I'm somewhat of an exhibitionist...and high as fuck...so there's that." He licked his lips then smirked, subtly letting the muscles in his stomach flex. "Your turn, Boss...what gets your dick up faster than anything?"

"Some really fucked up porn?" He glanced back at the pair of them, "Strippers... Die doing that to you right here in front of me." He gave a sheepish little smile and then ate another one of his nachos. 

Die reached to press his fingers against Kyo's abdomen and then slid them down over his side and then pinched him a bit, stroking him hard and fast for a few seconds, working his own frustrations out on Kyo's cock.

Kyo laughed then turned his focus on what Die was doing. He let his head drop back on Die's shoulder as he thrust his hips up into Die's hand then grinded roughly against Die's cock, moaning wantonly. 

After he was finally able to think again, he smirked at Boss and nodded at the tent in the elder's pants. "Wouldn't be the first time we've witnessed someone jacking off in the same room as us..."

Boss sat his food down and shifted on the couch. "Don't have to ask me twice." He pulled one leg up onto the seat, wiping his hand off on his pant leg and allowing his gaze to actually linger on Kyo this time. "No regrets when you're sober?"

Die let out a grunt. "We don't do regrets like that... not with this. I get off on showing Kyo to people... Kyo gets off on getting watched... and fuck, if you get off on watching, then we're all copacetic."

Kyo chuckled then nodded his head in agreement before shifting up a bit to tug his pants out of the way, revealing his cock to Boss's gaze. "Like Die said, we're all good." He smirked then ran his hand over his chest and down over the top of Die's hand before dipping it between his legs and giving his balls a squeeze.

The lust in Boss' gaze was instantaneous, his entire body shivering as he took in the other's arousal. "Holy mother of kami," he breathed out, "Damn, Die."

Die smirked over Kyo's shoulder, moving his hand for a moment so Boss could take in the whole package, his fingers rubbing at Kyo's thigh. "Sexy isn't he? The whole deal is..." he whistled through his teeth and then groaned, "damn fine."

Kyo couldn't help the blush that creeped into his cheeks at being praised like that. He cleared his throat and shifted off of Die's lap, discarding the pants then pointing to Die's. "Lose the pants, gorgeous." While he was waiting, he stared directly at Boss, his own hand going around his cock, stroking it slowly.

Die's eyes shifted between Boss and Kyo for a moment, hesitating just for a second, his mind flitting back to his current insecurities for a moment. A second later, he stood up and pulled the shirt over his head, dropping it on the small table next to him, adding the pants a few seconds later.

Boss watched Kyo with avid interest, reaching down and unfastening his belt. After a moment, he shrugged, "Fair is fair... but hang on." He got up and went to the door, flicking a few more locks and then coming back, pulling his shirt off and then unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. His eyes flicked over Die's form, and he arched an eyebrow. "Wow... the pair of you... got blessed." He chuckled and then shucked his pants, revealing he was somewhere around average, uncircumcised, and quite well aroused at the moment. His eyes drifted over the pair and then toward the bedroom. "Venue choice is yours. My house is open to whatever you're feeling up to."

Kyo gave Boss's body an appraising look, smirking before he turned to Die and raised an eyebrow in question. "Up to you, babe..." He didn't really care where at the moment, just as long as he got some form of release and soon.

Die grabbed Kyo's hand and gestured Boss along after them. "For the love of god, tell me where the lube and condoms are."

Boss followed along toward the bedroom, chuckling softly. "Are you normally that horny or just... the weed?" He moved to his dresser next to the bed and pulled out a bottle of lube, a leather cock ring, and some condoms, tossing them on the bed.

Kyo laughed softly at Die's request. He hadn't been thinking to take things this far, but it was more than obvious Die needed it, and he was pretty desperate himself. 

"Mm, we are almost always ready to fuck each other's brains out...but the weed is kicking that drive up tenfold..." He got into the bedroom, watching Boss get out the supplies, eyeing the cock ring with interest.

Die didn't miss the look, a grin slipping across his face. "Oh... you're in for it," he hissed out, pretty much shoving Kyo onto the bed and crawling over, him sitting on his thighs as he snatched up the cock ring, unfastened it, and then began the tedious work of fastening it around Kyo's cock and behind his balls. "You want relief, but you fucking looked at this like it was the best thing you've ever seen." He leaned in and hissed out, "And that naughty thing that gets you off... being my bitch>? Right now... in front of Boss, how about that?"

Boss minded his own business for a few moments, pulling a chair over and then settling in it, his legs spread.

Kyo looked at Die then let out a grunt as he pushed down on the bed. He watched the cock ring fasten around his cock and moaned, feeling the tight restriction of it, his hips jerking up slightly. "Fucker...," he spat out, his eyes flicking to Boss and offering him a wink.

Die didn't waste his time, pulling away and manipulating the other's position, rolling him over and then yanking his hips up in the air. "Got a spare tie around here?" 

Boss leaned over and tugged a box out from under the edge of the cabinet, pushing the lid off and tossing a short length of rope to Die instead. "Better?"

"Oh yes." Die picked it up and made quick work of tying Kyo's hands behind his back, smacking his ass a few times.

Kyo huffed as he was pushed into position, his ass in the air. He let Die bind his hands, groaning as he rubbed his cock against the bed. The weed had obviously tore down Die's usual barriers and part of him loved that...even if they were doing this in front of Boss. Hell, it just added more to it, being humiliated in front of someone. "F-fuck...," he hissed out as Die smacked his ass though he pushed it up more.

Boss let out a soft groan and smirked, shoving the box closer to Die in case he got even more kinks up his sleeve in the process.

Die shifted, reaching for the lube and letting it drip down Kyo's ass crack, watching his body respond with interest. "No prep for you, baby," he whispered, "just the way you want it." Not that Kyo couldn't take Die's dick just fine without prep as long as he was lubed, but that didn't matter nearly as much as the words. Time had granted them the ability to be used to one another in many ways. 

Shifting, Die poured some lube over his own dick and stroked off for a moment before he spread Kyo's ass again and pushed his hips forward, slowly sinking into his lover's body with a groan, glancing at Boss again, his eyes sparkling. 

The older man sat there, his hand wrapped around his cock, fisting himself quickly as he watched, his excitement evident in every single line of his body.

Kyo let out a soft whine as the cold lube dripped down his crack. He glanced back at Die and snorted. "Fuck me raw, Daisuke..." He shifted slightly then turned his head to watch Boss, grinning as the man jerked off furiously. 

As Die slid into his body, he moaned rather loudly against the bed, bucking back into Die. "Oh…fuck!"

"Stay still," Die growled out. "You do what I say, when I say. Is that clear?" He grabbed Kyo's hips a bit more harshly than usual. "Or I won't wreck you the way you want me to." An empty threat, he'd do whatever Kyo wanted, and he knew it.

Boss had to slow himself down, groaning as Die bit out the words. "You tell him, Daisuke."

Kyo growled but settled down, Die's words making his cock positively ache. "Yes, sir," he bit out.

Die ground his hips against Kyo's ass for a few moments, just enjoying the way his dick felt in the other's ass. The warmth, the sensation, the way he just adored Kyo surrounding him in such a way. And then, he glanced at Boss, watching him as the other drew lazy circles over the head of his cock, the other hand simply holding his dick still. He smirked and then looked back at Kyo, running his fingers hard down Kyo's back, no nails, but the pressure intense. 

Pulling almost all the way out, he slammed back in, and then began to nearly rabidly fuck him as hard as he possibly could, knowing he could lose control like this, and it didn't matter right then.

Kyo, for his part, was loving every moment of Die's harsh treatment and found it next to impossible to remain still. He moaned at Die's fingers, almost wishing his nails were scratching his skin but nonetheless enjoying the pressure of it. He had just taken a breath when Die slammed into him, forcing it out in one great whoosh. He let out an uninhibited cry, the slightest bit of pain shooting up his back. He relished it though, his cock already red and weeping.

Die let out a matching cry, loving it when Kyo was vocal. "Fucking louder for me, baby!" He drove his cock into Kyo's body, harder and faster, his nails finally biting into skin, sliding up Kyo's thighs, leaving red lines in his wake. 

The sound of Boss just going at his dick, the harsh pant of his breath as he sincerely got off on the situation filled the air. "Your cock," he whispered out, eyes flicking between Kyo's length and Die fucking Kyo nearly as hard as he could.

Kyo delivered Die's desire, damn near screaming as his lover's nails dug into his skin. It was so intense and everything felt so good, he could hardly get his breath. "D-DIE!"

In the next moment, Die grabbed Kyo's hair, wrenching his head back, his other hand clamping around Kyo's throat as he all but drove into him, gasping and groaning, his entire pace falling apart. "Do. Not. Cum," he hissed out, "or I will lay into your hide like you've never before seen." With that, he released a cry of his own, sinking in as he started to cum, spurting into Kyo's passage.

There was a dull thud as Boss shifted and knelt beside the bed, still desperately jacking off. After a few seconds, he uttered a quiet, "Let me see it... it's all... I need."

Kyo let out another cry, this one cut off by Die's hand on his throat, his body shuddering. He nodded his head in response to Die's command, moaning as he felt Die cumming inside him, his body tense, cock so hard it hurt. 

He managed to look at Boss, pure pleasure in his eyes as he shifted his leg enough to give the other a clear view of his cock, groaning softly. "So fucking hard..."

Die pulled out, shifting back and letting Boss see as his cum slid down Kyo's thigh, his hand stroking at Kyo's neck where he'd been choking him with it a few seconds prior. 

Boss let out a sort of muttered groan and then shifted back, leaning back on his hand and huffing out, "I'm... ah!" as cum began to shoot from his cock, landing on the floor between his legs. "Yes!"

Kyo let out a quiet whimper when Die pulled out, glancing towards Boss then pushing the cum from his body a bit, watching with pleasure as Boss came. "Hnng..." 

He lay there quiet for a moment then looked back at Die. "Please...."

Die shifted back to Kyo, reaching down and unfastening the cock ring. He shoved Kyo face-first into the pillows, keeping his ass up in the air. He reached under him, pulling his cock back toward him between his legs and then leaned in to suck on the tip. "Let go, baby," he purred out.

Kyo groaned in relief as the cock ring came off then grunted when Die pulled his cock back. As soon as Die's lips wrapped around the head, he moaned and started rocking against Die's mouth. It only took a moment before he was yelling out and cumming for the second time that night, spattering it all in Die's face. "Fuck!!"

Die just let Kyo cum on him, perfectly content to allow it to happen. He shuddered and then licked the tip as Kyo finally finished, sitting back and reaching to untie Kyo's hand, freeing him fully. He smacked his ass. In English, he murmured, "Bitch," with a grin on his lips.

Kyo slumped forward once Die had untied him, groaning into the pillows. At the word, he huffed and shook his head, responding back in English, "Fucker."

Die slid down next to him and rubbed over his back, gathering Kyo protectively close to him, his eyes peering curiously at Boss. He grinned at the other and then slid his hands over Kyo's slightly reddened ass. He leaned in, nipping Kyo's ear gently, whispering, "Was it good, baby?"

Boss shifted, grabbing a used towel and mopping up his own mess from the carpet before he put it on the bed and stood up, slipping out of the room to give them a few moments alone to regroup.

Kyo shivered then curled up against Die, smiling at Boss. "Mmm, yes...very much so." He watched as Boss left the room then turned to kiss Die deeply. "To be honest, that was really fucking erotic with Boss watching..."

Die let out a deep chuckle, reaching to use the towel to wipe up all the messes they'd created and then pressed a kiss on Kyo's shoulder, his hand coming to smooth over his lover's abdomen in a gentle sort of caress. "I took a chance... I'm glad it didn't turn out badly."

Kyo sighed softly, leaning into the touch. "Mmm, me too...I like that we can have these moments of...fun."

Die's hand meandered upward, lightly touching Kyo's throat. "I hope I didn't bruise you." At least not there... his hips, sure.

Kyo hummed and ran his hand over Die's. "I don't think so..." He reached up to push his fingers through Die's hair. "You're gorgeous when you're in control. I love it...and I love you."

"I love you, too, my sweet darling," he murmured quietly. Leaning in, he nipped the other's earlobe again. "God damn it, what did he put in there?" He huffed out a laugh.

Kyo grinned then laughed. "I don't know...but I'd almost like to take some home..." He patted Die's hip then finally rolled over to stand up, groaning as he did. "I feel like jelly..."

"You okay, love?" he asked quietly, sitting up and sniffing slightly.

Kyo grinned. "Oh yeah, just well-fucked...come with me to clean up? We'll just use all of his facilities today..." He laughed then headed for Boss's bathroom, grinning wider when he discovered Boss had a bidet. "Oh good, that'll be easier." He settled down on the seat and turned on the wash function, letting it spray his ass with nice, warm water, a pleased look on his face.

Die wandered into the bathroom behind Kyo, groaning softly as he took in the bidet, watching Kyo perch on it. "Okay... it's my one fucking regret with that house. We are fixing that. Seriously. My ass-end will thank you."

Kyo laughed. "I told you we needed one...we can put it where that one cabinet is." He finished up and let it dry him as well before standing and waving his hand toward it. "All yours, baby." He went to the sink to wash his hands and face, leaning his head back to look at the very light red marks on his throat. "Mm, sometimes, I wish you could bruise me here..."

"Next time we have a month off," Die shrugged a little, taking his seat and then sighing softly as he turned it on. "Hnngg, oh yeah... oh that's the stuff." He licked his lips and then chuckled.

Kyo groaned at the prospect then grinned at Die. "Gonna get off on it, baby? Careful, you might make me jealous over some plumbing..."

Die shifted a little and then gave Kyo a dirty grin. "Oh... nothing is as good as your dick up my ass, but... this is certainly a nice place to be sitting."

Kyo laughed then moved over to Die to lean down and kiss him. "I bet," he replied with a wink. "Now hurry up, I'm starving again...worked up quite an appetite being fucked senseless by you."

With a little laugh, Die flicked off the water and turned on the air, waiting on it to dry him before he stood up and shifted to the sink to wash his dick and his hands, then his face.

Kyo moved over to Die to wrap his arms around him, hugging him tightly. "You're gorgeous," he murmured before releasing Die and heading into Boss's bedroom to retrieve his borrowed clothing before remembering it was all in the living room. With a huff he went back into the bathroom to get a towel to sling around his waist. "Our stuff's still out front."

Die blinked a bit when Kyo left and then came back. He shrugged a little. "I'm pretty sure Boss has just seen our junk, Kyo." He chuckled a little and slipped past his lover to head - completely nude - into the living room. Retrieving the pants he'd been wearing, he glanced at the older man, a little smirk on his lips. "Was it good for you?"

Boss was sprawled across one end of the couch, his clothing back on, but he looked a bit more strung out than he had a few minutes earlier, his pupils blown out and his motions slightly less calculated as he slowly ate a cheese stick. He gave a small, knowing smile and then, "I came didn't I?"

Kyo snorted then wandered out after Die, grabbing his pants to pull on, skipping the shirt for now. He looked over at Boss and laughed, reaching out to pat the other man on the shoulder. "You did, all over your carpet."

Boss gave Kyo a cheeky grin. "And when I go to bed tonight, I'm going to be smelling both of you all over my sheets."

Die plopped down on the couch, yanking Kyo down to sit with him, nuzzling into his neck a little and just closing his eyes, sniffing.

Kyo chuckled then curled up in Die's lap, reaching out to grab his soda and taking a long drink before stealing the last cheese stick. "Sounds sexy...I think I'll probably sleep like the fucking dead tonight..."

Die let out a little laugh. "Depends on the point of view, I suppose. Sex stink is, after all, stink." He shifted a little and then shrugged.

Boss chuckled. "Mmm..." he leaned his head back, "took more than I meant to, sorry boys."

Kyo laughed then gave a big yawn. "Mmm s'okay. We really need to head back to our place anyway..."

Boss waved one hand a little. "Are you sure you're okay to drive? I don't want any incidents."

Kyo considered it for a moment then nodded. "Yeah, I think so. All that fucking sobered me up some." He grinned then looked up at Die. "You good, baby?

Die shifted around Kyo to carefully put the rest of their burgers into a bag, adding some of the brownie to a small extra container that used to contain something else and pushing it into the bag. "I think we'll be okay." Or at least he hoped so.

Boss watched Die, a little smirk on his face. "I expect you to eat what I gave you, or I'll be insulted, you hear me?"

Kyo grinned then grabbed the shirt he'd been wearing, tugging it on. "We'll get these back to you." He slipped out of Die's lap and held out his hand to Boss. "Thank you...for everything," he said, looking seriously at Boss as he did.

Die got up, wandering around to get their other stuff from the various rooms.

Boss pushed himself up off the couch and pulled Kyo in for a warm hug. "No regrets on any of this, right?"

Kyo smiled and hugged Boss back, shaking his head. "Not in the least, man. Just don't go telling people how glorious my dick is. They might come beating my door down just to get a taste."

Boss let out a hearty laugh, reaching for Die when he came back into the room. He slid his arms around the other man and reached to tuck something in his pocket, patting his back. "You both take care. Seriously."

Die nodded a little and hugged their friend back a bit harder than he initially intended. "Thank you. For everything."

Boss waved his hand. "No worries. I'm here."

Kyo waved then gathered up the food bags before heading to the door. He simply stepped into his shoes instead of bothering with untying them then headed for the car to wait on Die.

Die double-checked their stuff, clearing up some trash for Boss really quickly and then headed out after Kyo, carrying his shoes and their other clothes. He slid into the car and tossed his shit in the backseat, buckling in and sort of lying against the seat, looking for all the world just as stoned as he really was. "Please, God, do not let the world see me right now."

Kyo laughed and leaned over to kiss Die's cheek before popping open a compartment in the console and handing Die a pair of sunglasses. "Here, that'll help...but I don't plan on seeing anyone either." He started the car and pulled out, heading for their house, his pace just a bit slower than he normally would have gone.

Die accepted the gift of the sunglasses, planting them firmly on his nose. They were foreign in weight, not his own, but Kyo's instead. The thought put him at ease, and he just sat there, fingers flexing every few moments, impatient, unable to remain still even for a finite span of time.

Kyo took drove as carefully as possible though the closer they got to home, the faster he went. At long last, he was pulling into their driveway and cutting the engine, letting out a sigh when he did so. "We're home."

Die had fallen into a light doze along the way and when Kyo spoke up, he jerked a bit, snorting and then rubbing at his nose as he pushed himself upright in the seat.

Kyo chuckled softly and reached to pet Die's leg before grabbing the bag of food and getting out. "Just leave the other stuff. We'll get it later."

Die fished out his and Kyo's phones, taking them along for the trip inside, but leaving his suit rumpled in the back, his shoes in the floorboard of the car. He traipsed toward the door, pursing his lips just a little.

Kyo looked back at Die and smiled softly before opening the door and moving to let Die in first. He followed after him and kicked out of shoes before going to stuff the food in the fridge. While he was there, he grabbed two bottles of water and offered one to Die.

Die took the water from him, screwing off the top and downing a few drinks of it as he headed toward the stairs. "Tired... want to nap?" He knew it wasn't really their usual time to go to bed, but he'd been sleeping like shit, and he figured after they day they'd just had, he was allowed to just want to sleep through the rest of his high.

Kyo drank half his bottle then nodded. "Yes, please...I'm worn out." He screwed the top back onto to his water and turned to grab Die's hand leading him upstairs.

Die took his lover's hand, following him toward their bedroom. With any luck at all, tomorrow would be a better day, a brighter dawn.


	56. Chapter 56

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

The previous day had been more than a little stressful for Kyo, not to mention the hell Die went through. Fortunately, though, they'd found some much needed relief at Boss's place. Kyo had thought it was would be a good idea, but as he woke up, his stomach threatening to spew, things no longer seemed so cheery. He groaned and de-tangled himself from Die limbs to turn on his back. "Oh gods..."

Die lay beside him, curled up on his side. He'd been clutching Kyo most of the night, more than a bit clingy in his sleep. But the instant that his lover was awake and moving away, Die was pulled out from under the relieving veil of sleep.

Rolling over, he registered Kyo's words and quickly sat up. Those were the famous last words he'd heard a million and one times from either his own mouth or someone else's in the bus, and he was not fond of what generally followed. Flailing for a second, he grabbed the plastic trashcan from beside the bed and all but shoved it at Kyo. "Baby?" he asked softly.

Kyo sniffed and looked up at Die. "Feel like I'm gonna hurl..." He turned his head to look at Die, letting out a huff of breath. He so desperately did not want to vomit. "Ugh...Never again..."

Die stared at him for a moment. "I can clearly see that fact." He pulled himself upright and then frowned. "How the fuck does weed make you want to hurl? Or was it the food?" He sat up, holding the trashcan within range of the other still, not wanting to take a single chance on this and the new bedspread they'd just put on a week ago.

Kyo shifted gingerly and let out a bitter laugh. "It was the combo...weed and the really bad food." He swallowed a few times then waved the trashcan away. "Put it down for now. Maybe I can will it away."

Die frowned a bit and put the can in his lap, just watching Kyo carefully. Maybe did not sound good to him. He sniffed and then shrugged slightly. "I'm fine... but then again, I did my bullshit yesterday, so... there's that." He chuckled a bit and looked slightly sheepish.

Kyo huffed and sat up slowly. "Mm, think nothing of it..." He smiled and leaned over to lightly peck Die's cheek.

Die smiled a bit and then reached to lightly rub Kyo's hair. "Okay, so... would a bath or a shower be more operative to you right now?"

Kyo closed his eyes and leaned into Die's touch. "Mm, perhaps a shower...if I can stand..."

Die nodded as he pulled back and then stood up, still holding onto the trashcan as he offered Kyo a hand up.

Kyo took Die's hand and stood, wobbling a bit on his feet then taking a deep breath. "I'm good. How are you? Feeling human today?" He grinned a little, slipping his arms around Die.

"I am. Whatever Boss gave me helped a lot." He stepped around the pile of clothing on the floor and headed toward the bedroom door.

Kyo nodded and followed along with Die. "Good." Once they were in the bathroom, he moved over to the toilet to piss, letting out another groan.

Die put the trashcan down once they were in the bathroom, going to start the shower so it could warm up. He peeled off what little clothing he still had on from the night prior and then shivered a bit as he watched Kyo relieve himself. His eyes ghosted down the other's body, arousal pooling in his belly as he stared at the other rather blatantly.

Kyo felt Die's eyes on him, and he glanced back as he finished up his task. "Mm, love it that your eyes take on that dark, gorgeous look when you're being particularly naughty." He finally shook off then turned to move into the shower, testing the water. "Mmn...just right."

Die let out a little laugh and then shifted away from the counter, going toward the shower as well. "Mmm... at least my hang-ups are trying to be less... prominent?"

Kyo snorted and tugged Die into the shower. "Hang-ups, smang-ups...I don't know about all that but....I prefer it when some things are prominent."

Die burst out laughing, pushing Kyo back toward the wall, running his hands down the other's sides. "Mmm... well, some things can be more prominent if you want them to be, baby."

Kyo smirked then let out a groan as he was pushed into the wall. "Is that so?" he purred out, his hand snaking out to trails over Die's chest.

Die let Kyo get a good taste of him there before he pulled back and turned away, grabbing the shower gel and both of their loofahs, pouring some on both, handing one over to Kyo.

Kyo pursed his lips and let out a sound of protest when Die turned away. He grabbed his own loofah though, pouting up at Die. "You're such a tease..."

"Hey, once in a while, I'm allowed to be. Besides... Mr. Pukey, that's not a good way to start in on things, now is it?" He began to rub at his own body with his loofah.

Kyo stood there for a moment then huffed a bit. "You make a good point..." He glanced down at his dick and shrugged. "Not right now, blame the stomach." With that, he began washing, his actions slow and easy.

Die nearly rushed through the washing part and then went into shampooing his hair, paying more careful attention here. He frowned a little, glancing down at his pubes and then over at Kyo, his eyebrow arched. "Fuck... what the hell kind of funk have I been in?" He sighed, opening the shower curtain and then reaching out to get his electric razor, glad it was waterproof. Shifting to the side, he began to shave off most of his pubes, trimming them down to a more manageable level.

Kyo finished up rather quickly and was rinsing out his hair when Die started examining his pubes. His eyes quickly landed on his lover's crotch area, humming softly. "I was beginning to wonder...I'm used to a much better trimmed Die...."

Die sighed softly and shook his head slightly. "Well... taking care of it now." He finished up the trim and then double-checked it. Once he was done with that, he trimmed up his underarms as well, thinning them out considerably.

Washing off the head, he gestured a bit. "Would you like me to just take care of all of this at once?"

Kyo licked his lips, leaning against the shower wall as he watched Die go about getting rid of his body hair. "Mmm, yeah, go for it..."

Die knelt down and then reached to lightly hold Kyo's cock, shaving around it and then lightly holding his balls, pulling the skin taut enough to shave them a bit as well. Down each side and then around. He wiped the loose hair off and then stood back up, putting the razor out of the shower again. Washing out the shampoo, he put in his conditioner. As soon as he was done, he shivered a bit violently, stepping aside from the spray. His cheeks were lightly flushed, but he said nothing at all just yet.

Kyo shivered while Die went about taking care of the hair at the base of his cock. When Die was finished, Kyo slipped his hand down to run over the area with a sigh. "So much nicer...."

Die chuckled softly, shifting a bit on his spot, watching Kyo. "Good. It looks so much more amazing that way, just sayin'. Not to imply it's not amazing generally, but more."

Kyo smirked and leaned over to grope Die's ass. "Mm, maybe I'll shave it smooth one day." He grinned then moved behind Die, his arms slipping around the other, his hands settling on his lower abdomen. "You're squirming..."

Die made a little face. "Trust me on this one... it fuckin' itches when it's coming back in if you don't intend to shave forever." He shrugged. "Plus razors near my dick? No thanks." He had just leaned back to wash his hair out when the other slid his arms around him and lightly pushed his hand on his lower abdomen. A soft grunt left him, and he closed his eyes. "Haven't gone yet," he muttered back.

Kyo grinned, pressing a little more insistently against Die's bladder. "I figured as much..." His hand travelled downward to grope at Die's length a bit, then finally he moved away to let Die finish up with rinsing his hair.

Arousal swept through Die hard and fast when Kyo pushed against his bladder. Part of him really wanted to do something terrible, but the other part was still more than a bit scared of it. He shifted and washed his hair out completely before he moved enough for Kyo to do the same.

Kyo fucking loved the look he saw on his lover's face when he stepped back. He could see the desire come over Die's face, and it made him nearly groan. He could also see the uncertainty and fear, and that made him sad. He wanted Die to be happy, to indulge in whatever he liked. He moved under the spray to rinse when Die moved back. He made quick work of it then looked up at his lover, smiling. "You're gorgeous when you're all aroused…"

Die huffed out a little laugh, wincing just after as it pulled the muscles in his abdomen a bit tight. Yeah, he was gonna have to go or suffer whatever consequences lay behind losing it somewhere else. The water was certainly not helpful. Kyo was over the drain though, and he wasn't quite that brave just yet.

Stepping out, he grabbed his towel and quickly dried off before moving toward the toilet, lifting the lid. "So you know about the bidet? Were you serious we could look into having one installed? Renovate this area?"

Kyo followed along behind Die, frowning just a wee bit that his lover went to the toilet rather than pissing somewhere unusual. He shrugged though and moved over to stand in front of him. "I think that we could honestly fit one in with a little rearranging.

Die looked a bit shocked when the other came to stand between him and the toilet, a pang sliding through him at the cut-off of his relief. "Yeah... good," Die returned, more than a bit distracted for the moment. And then, "Unless you're trying the torture game or want to clean the floor, I seriously need to piss."

Kyo raised an eyebrow at Die then laughed softly, moving out of the way. "Then go piss, Die. I'm not going to stop you..."

Die pursed his lips a bit and then shifted to the toilet, moving the lid up and shifting close enough to start to relieve himself. As he pissed, he let out a moan, thumb lightly stroking the base of his cock.

Kyo watched, his eyes lidding as he caught Die's extra movements. Licking his lips, he reached out, running his finger along the length of Die's cock.

Die's hips jerked slightly, a bit of his piss splashing off the rim of the bowl before he readjusted the angle and calmed himself down. "Oh my god," he hissed out, finding he was super sensitive to Kyo's touch.

Kyo smirked, unable to resist moving his finger to stroke over the head of Die's cock, ignoring the fact that piss was getting on his hand.

Die gasped as Kyo touched him like that, his fingers flexing as he debated grabbing Kyo's wrist and putting his whole hand there. He shivered slightly and closed his eyes. "I... o-oh..."

Kyo chuckled lowly, moving closer to Die, letting his fingers draw small circles around his cock head. "Good, baby?"

Die's hips arched a bit, his stream slowing down to a trickle as he backed it off on purpose, wanting to extend the entire thing. He let out a tiny whimpering noise, arousal sweeping through him fast.

Kyo grunted, loving the way Die reacted to things like this. He wrapped his hand around Die's cock, stroking him lightly as the stream slowed down. He shifted a bit so he could place his other hand on Die's lower abdomen, pressing a little there. "You're making me hard just by watching you..."

The smallest of near-squeaks slid from Die's mouth as he jerked a little into the touch on his abdomen, shuddering a second later. "I'm about to get hard," he returned, huffing out a little laugh.

Kyo snorted as he pressed harder against Die's stomach, his hand flexing around his cock. "Good...because I'm about to fuck you over the counter..."

It was a whim, and Die went with it, praying Kyo wouldn't back out on him or make a big deal out of it. He slid his hand under the edge of the counter, pulling free a tiny bottle of lube and putting it on the counter closer to Kyo. Without a word, he shifted himself so he was still over the toilet, but holding onto a few sturdy items to keep himself still and present Kyo with the correct height to do what he wanted. "Do it... now."

Kyo watched Die grab the lube and had to smile. The thought to do exactly what Die was requesting had slipped through his mind moments before. He took the lube and moved behind Die. Opening the bottle, he placed it at the top of Die's crack and squeezed half of it out, immediately taking his finger, gathering some and pushing it into Die. He made quick work of it, soon pouring the rest onto his cock then positioning himself behind Die, grasping his lover's hips and easing into his body with a groan. "Oh…fuck..."

Die shivered slightly when the lube ran down his ass, it being slightly cold still. Bowing his head, he did his best to hold the rest of his piss for the time being, shifting uneasily a few times while Kyo prepped him.

And then Kyo was sliding into him, stretching and filling him in all the right sort of ways. He pushed back toward him and released a soft sigh, hanging his head forward as he did his best to relax around his lover. Gritting his teeth, he waited for a moment and then, finally said, "Fuck it out of me."

Kyo took half a second to let Die adjust then he was thrusting into him hard and fast, his actions built to do exactly as his lover requested. "How long can you hold it while I fuck you, baby?"

Die strained against the other, doing his best to hold on while Kyo fucked him, but the other was honestly not pulling any punches, going as fast and hard as he could.

Kyo let out a low laugh when he got no response. He shifted and wrapped his arm around Die's middle, slowing down but still pushing in just as hard.

Die squirmed under him, whimpering and then quite suddenly spurting out a hard jet of piss as Kyo hit a certain spot inside him. He let out a sharp cry, the sound of his piss hitting the toilet bowl echoing in the bathroom. He stopped it after a second and hissed out, "More."

The vocalist shivered slightly as he felt Die's muscles inside contract slightly as the piss shot out of him. He did as Die requested and continued fucking him at that angle with hard thrusts. "Fuck, Die..."

Die's fingers turned white as he gripped the counter and the towel bar as hard as he could. He started to moan, louder each time Kyo thrust into him. And before long, he was full-on begging for it, urging Kyo on with perhaps some of the dirtiest talk he'd ever managed before. And then he was losing it, a steady stream of hot piss flowing from his cock as he reached down and started to jack himself off, obviously more than a little desperate. "Oh god! Oh fuck! I'm... oh FUCK!"

Kyo growled as obscenities spilled from Die's mouth, his thrusts getting harder and faster with each one. Soon, he was pounding into his lover's body as the other started all out pissing. He shifted and placed one hand in front of Die's cock, letting the stream hit his fingers. "Yes, Die, fuck!!"

It wasn't but a few more moments before Die was done, his cock straining with how hard he was. His head fell completely forward, and he shuddered hard, cum spurting out over Kyo's fingers, not a single touch to his dick having been needed to get him off.

Kyo watched over Die's shoulder as his lover lost it, the cum spurting onto his hand. He groaned then focused on his own release, his hips snapping hard against Die's. Within a few moments, his pace was faltering, and then he was cumming, filling Die with his offering as he let out a loud moan.

Die's hips still moved even after Kyo was done, nearly frantic with how aroused he was right then. It didn't matter that he'd just cum, he still wanted release. Reaching down, he grabbed his own cock and began jerking himself off. "If you... have any..." he let out a little whimpering sound, almost afraid to ask for what he really wanted right then.

Kyo stilled once he was done cumming, his cock slowly softening within Die. He was about to pull out when Die spoke his request. A soft huff of a laugh escaped him, and he moved to grab Die's hip, pushing closer to him to keep from slipping out. It took him a moment but finally he was able to let out a few good spurts of piss into Die's body, a shiver going through him as he did.

Die rocked back on him while it happened, moaning, his hand moving faster, his breath coming in pants. Piss ran down his legs that he knew wasn't his own, and that was what it took for the second time, this one more violent than the first. He let out a loud cry, nearly collapsing as he began to cum, his load shooting over the back of the toilet seat, some of it onto the tiles below as his knees began to buckle.

Kyo groaned as Die rocked against him, his cock still sensitive from having cum. He shifted back to hold Die up as his lover came hard a second time, his arm around his middle making sure he didn't actually fall. "Fuck, baby..."

Die's hips bucked, and he whined softly, easing himself down to straddle the toilet, pushing a little to get the cum and piss back out of himself. He leaned forward, panting as he tried to catch his breath, still trembling with the power of his orgasm.

Kyo shifted to lean against the counter, his clean hand going to thread through Die's hair, his eyes half-closed as he caught his breath.

Die let out a few more soft groans, leaning back into Kyo's touch, sniffing a little and then drawing in a larger breath. "Oh my fuck," he breathed out.

Kyo chuckled and leaned down, pressing his lips to the top of Die's head. "Uh huh...," he murmured. "Oh my fuck, indeed..."

Die took a few moments to reorient himself with reality and then sighed, shifting to stand up. He moved around and got some toilet paper to mop up the drops that hadn't hit the toilet, tossing the paper into the bowl and flushing. With that done, he moved back to the shower, turning it on and stepping in to do a quick rinse. "C'mere, I'll clean you up real fast."

Kyo watched Die clean up then grinned, moving over to step into the shower. "Mm, I was just contemplating doing that..."

The former redhead pulled Kyo in close and knelt down, carefully washing off his cock, balls, and then his legs. Once he was done, he smiled up at him and lightly patted his ass. "All done."

Kyo peered at Die as the other washed him, a soft smile on his face. "Mm, thank you baby." He held his hand out to help Die up then slipped his arms around him to hug him tightly. "Have I told you how incredibly sexy I find you?"

Die ducked his head a little, leaning in to put his arms around his lover's waist, his nose in his hair as he let the water wash him that way. "You win the sexy award..." he was quiet for a moment and then offered, "I... um... thank you."

Kyo snorted softly then tilted his head back to look up at Die. "You're welcome." He grinned then leaned up to kiss Die lightly before shifting back to let him finish rinsing off.

Die just nodded a little and watched the other go, turning and starting to wash himself off. He finished up quickly, smiling a bit and stepping out of the shower as he shut it off. He gathered up his towel and then padded out of the room, stepping around both cats, who were currently play fighting on the floor, and making his way toward the bedroom.

Kyo followed after Die, giving himself a good pat down with the towel then stepping out of the room. He nudged the cats with his foot then headed into the bedroom, flopping down crossways on the bed. "Mmm, you sapped all of my energy."

Die was busy rummaging through one of his drawers when Kyo came in, various shirts and underwear nearly falling out of it while he dug around. "I think you must have given it to me, I feel better than I have in months." He pulled out a pair of gold briefs that Toshiya had once given him as a joke and winced. "Jesus fuck."

"I'm glad..." Kyo turned his head to watch Die, an eyebrow raising at the briefs. "Those are about the ugliest things I've ever seen." He chuckled then sat up, pushing his fingers through his hair.

"Damn fuckin' close at least." He shifted to the side and tossed them into the trash bin. "Toshiya, I swear to god." He pulled out a nice red pair of boxer briefs and then went about getting them on. With that done, he sort of jammed everything back into the drawer and opened the next one down, extracting a pair of black cargo pants to put on. "It's a bit strange to get your buddies underpants anyway, isn't it?"

Kyo shrugged a bit, finally standing and going to get dressed himself. "Yeah, unless it's really a joke...I doubt he expected you to really wear them."

"That's true." Die zipped up his pants and then came up behind Kyo, sliding his arms around his lover's middle. "There's this old pair of blue jeans you have... little bit long on you but they make your ass look fucking amazing. Wear them for me today?"

Kyo immediately leaned into Die's touch, humming softly. "Okay, just for you..," he murmured, though he didn't make any effort to move away from Die's embrace.

Die nipped lightly at Kyo's ear and then patted his hip, stepping around him and going into the closet, starting to root through his shirts, making little faces. "Okay, I think it's time to donate some of this shit to someone. Fucking hell, man."

When Die moved away, Kyo bent down and dug through his drawer to find the aforementioned jeans. He finally came across them and pulled them out, tugging them on and doing them up. Once finished with that, he moved over to the closet, peering around Die. "Hey, you're a rock star; you're allowed to have a fuck-ton of clothing. Mariah Carey's "closet" is bigger than our bedroom." He grinned and reached in, grabbing one of Die's well-worn t-shirts to wear.

Die snorted. "I don't wear half of this... a lot of it was just given to me." He shrugged. "I think we should find some underprivileged people who need it and it would fit, and spread the wealth a bit."

Kyo slipped the shirt on then looked into the closet again. "We could...it is rather cramped in here now that you mention it." He shuffled through a few things then shrugged. "It's up to you, baby. It's your stuff...mostly."

Die chuckled. "That's what I'm saying. It's like a clothing bomb went off in my stuff!" He selected a red t-shirt with some random print on the front and pulled it on, reaching to run his hand through Kyo's hair. "So let's um... see who would need it?"

Kyo laughed then nodded his head. "Yeah, well…there are tons of shelters and shit that need clothes, I'm sure." He paused for a minute then snickered. "Or you could sign them and sell them on e-bay and donate the money."

"Oh god." Die shook his head. "That's asking for trouble, my friend." He lightly patted Kyo's ass and then headed back for the bathroom, quickly going about grooming himself into something at least partly presentable.

Kyo laughed then moved to the dresser, simply running a comb through his hair then flopping back on the bed again, feeling rather lazy.

Die reappeared a few minutes later, his hair combed, his stubble trimmed, and smelling faintly of his cologne. Settling down beside Kyo, he lightly patted his thigh. "Do you know what excites me a lot?"

Kyo smiled to himself as he smelled Die's cologne. He shifted a bit closer to his lover and reached out, running his hand up his back. "Mm, what excites you, baby?"

"Just getting to do simple things like this. Talk about random shit, feel free to sit next to you and touch you... just to be around you." He turned and then laid down on his side next to Kyo, one leg slipping over his lover's as he leaned in and kissed him delicately on the lips, one hand cupping his cheek. "I love you."

Kyo grinned at Die's words, shifting closer and kissing him back. "I love you, too....and I agree. It's some of the simplest shit that makes me happy with you." He reached out to stroke his hand over Die's side.

Shifting slightly to accommodate Kyo's movements, Die leaned in and slowly began to kiss Kyo. This wasn't any of his lust-fueled usual kisses. Rather it was just sweet, nearly innocent, and built to show affection more than anything else. Kyo let out a soft sigh as Die began to kiss him in such a way. He very happily kissed him back, pouring his love and affection into the act as he moved his hand to cup the back of Die's neck.

Die kept it up for a few minutes, finally relinquishing Kyo's lips, giving his hip a little squeeze before sitting up and then heading for his dresser, going about putting on his rings and necklace, a few bracelets and his watch. He looked around for his wallet and chain and then pursed his lips. "Oh... our shit is still in the car, and we need to return Boss' clothing."

The vocalist let out a little huff and sat up himself. He moved over to dresser himself, slipping on his own rings and necklace as well as his bracelets and watch. He looked at Die then wrinkled his nose. "We need to wash them first..."

"Yeah, for sure." Die quickly headed downstairs, taking the steps two at a time and then going to the bunny's cage, making sure it had food and water before he gave it a quick scritch and went to turn off the alarm system. Slipping outside, he went to get the mail and then the stuff out of the car, coming back in and emptying their pockets on the hall table. With that done, he dumped the clothing into the washer and called up the stairs, "Bring down the rest of our laundry?"

While Die was getting the mail and such, Kyo went to brush his teeth and put on deodorant. He heard his lover call for the laundry just as he was finishing so he gathered up a few stray things to stuff into the hamper before dragging it downstairs to the laundry area. "We should get a laundry chute..."

Die laughed and nudged Kyo. "But it's more fun watching you flex your muscles to get it down here." He began emptying the various items into the washer, setting aside the whites for a second load and then adding detergent and the fabric softener ball.

Kyo let out a laugh then swatted Die's ass. "Look at us, being all...domestic and shit..."

Puffing out his cheeks, Die shook his head and then grinned. "It has to happen sometimes... and I'm sorry, I've been being lazy lately and not doing my part."

Kyo shook his head and waved his hand as he wandered into the kitchen. "Don't worry about it. I've let you take the bulk of it a lot of times...now, what do we want for lunch? Brunch? Lunch? What the hell time is it anyway?"

"Not a clue what time it is. Just... I dunno, something that won't upset your stomach again."

"Hmm, old-school Japanese it is then." Kyo grinned then started getting together ingredients to make miso, rice and eggs.

Die made sure the lint trap was cleaned out for the dryer and then padded into the kitchen, sliding up onto the countertop and sitting there, his legs swinging back and forth. "Look... Kyo... I'm really sorry about the past few months. I..." he shrugged a little, "I've fucked up a lot, and I just want you to know it's never been because of you. It's just my mind gets tangled up and I freak out, ya know?"

Kyo got the rice in the cooker and water boiling for the miso before Die came into the kitchen. He looked up at his lover and shook his head, reaching out to rub his leg. "I know, Die. It's...well, it's not fine but....it's okay. You know? This isn't the first time, and I'm sure it won't be the last. There's a lot of bullshit stress that comes with what we do, and honestly, a lot of guys just all out quit the minute things go south. So, in all reality, Die, I'm proud of you for sticking with it."

Die studied the other and then frowned, looking away. "How could I quit? I mean... this is the life I know, and it's what keeps you and I both going. It's not the job itself; it's the fucked up in betweens... the past... the insecurities that are born from life being what it fucking is."

Kyo sighed softly and shrugged. "I know. You've seen me rip myself open because I couldn't handle the shit anymore. The constant scrutiny of our lives is damned stressful...all we can do is ignore it the best we can."

Something akin to pain slid across Die's features for a moment, the memory of what had happened in the past clouding his mind. He nodded as he stared off into the distance. "Yeah..." he reached to pat his pocket gently. "Boss gave me some more of the anxiety meds, and I should probably keep them on me."

Kyo's expression had darkened as he talked, and the pain that appeared on Die's face only made it worse. He let out a soft sigh and nodded, his hand stroking over Die's arm. "Yeah, probably so..," he murmured before turning to add the miso to the boiling water. After stirring it in, he reduced the heat then turned back to Die.

"No matter what, I'm here for you..."

"You know the same applies to you, Kyo... I'm always right here. I don't care how absorbed I am in my own world; I want to know when you're suffering, okay?"

After giving Die a long look, Kyo nodded, the corner of his mouth lifting slightly. "Of course..."

Die offered him a soft smile and then hopped down from the counter. "I'm gonna take the rabbit outside for a bit to get some grass, okay?"

Nodding his head, Kyo leaned over to peck Die on the cheek. "Okay, I'll call when the food's ready." He turned and went back to adding stuff to their soup then started on the eggs.

Die knelt down in front of the cage and opened it, the rabbit eager to come out, leaping onto the kitchen floor. He gathered him up and opened the back door, slipping outside. Settling him down on the grass, he sat on the edge of the concrete, watching him carefully.

While Die was outside, Kyo let the soup simmer a bit while he took care of the few dishes that were in the sink then finally got the pan ready for eggs. After stirring them together with a bit of water and salt and pepper, he poured them in and started scrambling them.

The bunny made a few rounds of the area, eating some grass from the allowed patch. Finally, he came back to Die and sat between the guitarist's bare feet. Die reached down and stroked over the soft fur. "So I guess Kyo doesn't mind you being around too much... I'm worried about how you'll fair without us around though."

Kyo finally finished up their meal and got everything onto plates and into bowls, carrying them to table once he had. He headed outside, stopping when he heard Die talking to the rabbit. "No, Kyo doesn't really mind so much because Die's doing a good job of taking care of him."

Die looked up when Kyo replied and gave him a soft smile. "Have you held him yet? He likes to be near people so much..."

Kyo shook his head, going to squat down next to Die. He reached out to stroke the rabbit's ears. "I've always been scared of hurting them or something."

"He doesn't kick like a lot do. Just pick him up like this." Die slid his hand under the bunny's belly and then his other hand under his back legs, lifted him an inch or so and then put him back down. "He likes to be tucked against your chest."

Kyo eyed the little creature for a moment then reached out and mimicked Die's actions, carefully lifting the bunny up. When he didn't flip out, Kyo brought him up to his chest and smiled. "Cute little fucker."

Die chuckled as he watched Kyo cradle the rabbit. "Yeah... he is." Settling back, he pulled out his phone and positioned the camera before taking a photo of Kyo and the bunny. He saved it and then tucked his phone away again, reaching to rub lightly between the bunny's ears. "He likes this a lot, too. I think he's... different somehow than most rabbits."

Kyo let out a little huff at the picture then stroked the bunny's head after Die did. "Perhaps so. He seems pretty mellow most of the time."

"He definitely is." He tilted his head a bit, watching Kyo carefully. "He's already pooped, so we can let him down inside for a bit while we eat. He should be fine."

Kyo chuckled and stood, still holding the rabbit. "Okay. Everything's ready and on the table." He turned to go inside, settling the bunny on the floor then going to wash his hands quick before grabbing a couple of waters from the fridge. Moving back over to the table, he settled down in his seat then waited on Die.

Die went to wash his hands as well after he latched the door. Coming to the table, he settled down and smiled. "It smells so good."

Kyo grinned at Die, shrugging. "It's like the only thing I can cook decently well." He gave a chuckle then dug into his soup.

"Liar." He chuckled quietly and then dug in, making little pleased sounds.

Kyo laughed softly as he ate, shaking his head. He ate his soup first then went for his eggs and rice, letting out his own pleased sound. "I love it when the eggs are nice and fluffy."

"Me, too. So many people cook them too fast and it sucks." He shrugged and then crossed his legs, one over the other, watching as the cats came around to investigate the bunny, sniffing and lightly touching with their paws, the bunny shoving his face in theirs to sniff as well, far more bold than either cat.

Kyo nodded, taking another big bite before leaning over to watch the animals. After he swallowed, he laughed and nodded to them. "Cute and brave. That's funny."

"Oh yeah, he's got some balls on him for sure." Die smirked, finishing off his eggs and going for his miso.

Kyo chuckled then sat back, drinking some of his water. He shifted in his seat, tucking his leg up under himself as he finished off his rice then sighed. "I think I may live now."

"Good. That's generally advisable," Die returned, a smirk on his lips. "You sure it was just the food from last night? Not... the other parts?"

Kyo sniffed and shrugged. "I'm guessing so...I mean, I pigged out pretty badly..."

Die nodded. "Yeah... me, too. I mean, that was like a double burger, and I ate most of it. But I guess maybe since I needed the calories it was easier on me?"

Kyo sipped at his water and nodded. "Perhaps, plus I ate a lot of the brownies on top of that. So yeah...my stomach was unappreciative of it all."

"Mmm... speaking of which." Die cast a glance at the fridge. "I should feel bad about having that around, but somehow... it fuckin' helped. A lot." He sighed and put his chin on his hand, elbow propped on the table. "What would the fans say if they knew?"

"I imagine that some of them would be disappointed, some would be thrilled, and others would just have expected it." Kyo grinned. "The real surprise would be that I joined in..."

Die chuckled. "Yeah... that's true." He tilted his head back. "Not the worst thing I've ever done, though." He sipped his soup and then set the bowl down.

Kyo shook his head. "No, not the worst either of us has done..." He shrugged then scratched his nose. "Perhaps one day, when we're like in our seventies, I'll write a memoir detailing all of the sordid things we used to do."

Die chuckled. "Go all Nikki Sixx on the world? Show them the fucked up version of our lives? The truth behind the lies?"

Kyo snorted. "Yeah, why the hell not? I don't even know if I'll be able to sing then...so what else will there be to do? Besides fucking you senseless still...that is."

"Mmm... are we gonna do the old people tango still?" He reached across the table and lightly ran his fingers over Kyo's tattooed hand. "Good."

Kyo smirked, turning his hand to hold onto Die's. "Yes, yes we are. I'll eat Viagra three times a day if I have to, and you can come sit on my lap in my wheelchair."

The sound that came out of Die was purely a cackle, his head tilting back as he laughed, fully and freely. "I love you so fuckin' much, baby."

Kyo grinned widely then joined in on the laughter. "Ah, I love you, too...and I will always...even if your dick gets floppy."

"It's okay, we can work with floppy dick... and our hair migrating to our chins and ears... big bushy old man eyebrows, wrinkles, and aching bones." He squeezed Kyo's fingers. "We can live with it all... just so long as we have one another."

"I refuse to live any other way." Kyo squeezed Die's hand tightly then gave him a bright smile. "We sound so fucking sappy right now..."

"Sad and sappy, but... that's okay because this is us. Our truth and our lives." He smiled and released Kyo's hand, leaning back in his seat, glancing down at the pets, who were curled up around one another.

The vocalist nodded then stood, padding over to his lover to hug him from behind as he peered at their pets. "I guess they all love each other, too."

"I think they got it from their daddies." He craned his neck back to stare up at Kyo, liking his lover over him like this. "Mmm... do this more often, I like it."

Kyo peered down at Die then leaned in to give him an upside down kiss. "Mmm, I think I can do that..." He shifted to nuzzle Die's neck, peppering it with little kisses.

Die grinned, letting Kyo do as he wished. "Thank you so much for being one hundred percent behind me... even in all the crap that's gone down. Now, tell me... what can I do for you?"

Kyo finally just settled his head against Die's shoulder, his hands idly stroking his chest. "You can be happy for me."

Die nodded, his hand coming to lightly touch Kyo's hair again. "I will be... I promise."


	57. Chapter 57

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

Die had found himself in a far better mood for the past few days, his anxiety and depression regulated better than they had been in years. He could smile again and make it genuine. Perhaps best of all, he rarely felt the urge to void himself after consuming any food. The only downside was that the insomnia was back, leaving him lying there awake in the dead of the night for seemingly no reason at all. But he'd found he could deal with that best out of anything that was wrong with him, regulating a certain intake of alcohol at night if he desperately needed to sleep.

He hadn't slept more than five minutes the night before and finally, he'd given up, not wanting to turn back to alcohol for everything. Instead, he'd gone into his closet and started through everything in there, trying it on and deciding if he wanted to keep it or not. If he wanted to keep it, it went back in the closet, if he didn't care but thought Kyo might, it went in a pile near the door, and if he didn't want it at all and thought Kyo would have no desire for it either, he put it right into one of many garbage bags to take to an all-boys school for the underprivileged. It seemed the best method, and by the time dawn arrived, he'd gotten through half the closet.

With the increase of Die's happiness, Kyo found himself experiencing an uplift in general mood as well. He adored seeing his lover smiling and laughing easily. The only thing that made him worry now was the fact that Die wasn't sleeping like he should be. Many nights, he'd wake up to an empty bed to hear Die fiddling around in their music room or doing something downstairs. Other times, when Die was actually asleep by him, he could smell the alcohol that his lover used as a sleep aid. That didn't worry him too much in terms of Die's alcohol use because he knew it wasn't a lot, but it was still concerning that his lover needed it at all. 

On this particular night, Kyo had fallen asleep pretty quickly and didn't notice Die had gotten back up until sunlight was streaming through the windows. Mother Nature woke him up, and he rolled over with a grunt to snuggle up to Die for a moment only to find his spot empty. Huffing, he sat up and peered blurry-eyed towards the closet, barely making out the piles of stuff. "Die...?," he called out in a rough voice that made him cough afterwards.

Die popped up from where he'd been sitting on the floor, going through some of the shoes he had in the bottom of the closet, deciding if they were acceptable or not when he heard Kyo's voice. He stood up and made his way out of the closet, coming to sit on the side of the bed, clad only in his boxers for the time being. "Hey, baby. You're awake early."

Kyo sniffed then shifted around, his head landing in Die's lap, his arms going around his waist. "Mm, couldn't find you...and gotta piss."

Die chuckled softly. "I'm right here; it's fine." He gently stroked Kyo's hair and then glanced around. "Just doing what we decided we would with the donation stuff." He lightly patted Kyo's cheek and then nudged his shoulder. "Go piss."

Kyo hummed in response, nuzzling against Die's stomach for a few moments before sitting back up. He gave a wide yawn then looked over at the closet again as he stood up. "Looks like you've gotten pretty far," he mumbled sleepily, his feet carrying him towards the door. He wandered off into their bathroom, taking his much needed piss then washing his hands and face before coming back and flopping down on the end of the bed. "So...what've you got so far?"

Die watched his lover go, getting back up and going back to sit in the closet, the little light still on as he rummaged through more of his shoes. When Kyo spoke up again, he glanced up and then gestured. "Stuff I'm keeping is going back in the closet, stuff I'm donating in the bags, and stuff you might want to go through first... right there." He pointed at a small pile. "Things I know you've borrowed or talked about at some point."

Kyo slumped over onto his side and stared at the pile, squinting in the low light. "Mm, okay...decided where you're donating stuff?"

"There's an underprivileged boys’ school that needs stuff... thought it'd work out well enough." Die tossed another pair of shoes into the bag of shoes he was currently creating and picked up a pair of silver AllStars. He chuckled. "Do you still have the gold ones?"

Kyo smiled softly at the thought of his lover giving his stuff to a boys’ school. Something about it made him feel rather warm and fuzzy inside. He finally pushed himself up off the bed again to go sit cross-legged next to the pile of stuff Die wanted him to go through. Immediately, he spotted a well-worn t-shirt of Die's and tugged it on before looking at the shoes and laughing. "Yeah, I think so...somewhere in the mess that is my own closet."

"We should totally wear them again. That was a ridiculous shopping trip." Die pawed through a few more things and then tossed two more pairs of shoes in, tying up the bag. "Much better."

Kyo laughed softly and nodded. "Yeah, it really was." He shifted a bit then held up one of the shirts Die had left out for him to look at. "I used to love seeing you in this shirt. There was something about the way it fit you."

Die glanced at Kyo and the shirt in question. Pulling himself up from the floor, he took it from him and pulled it on, arching an eyebrow. "Still got it?"

Kyo watched Die tug on the shirt and grinned. "Mmhmm. It still looks damn good on you. Keep it?"

"For you, my love." He pulled it off and put it back into the closet on a hanger, starting to dig through the next section of closet. "What is it about it that you like?"

Kyo laughed softly and shrugged. "I don't know. It fits you just so and I love the deep V-neck of it."

"You just like seeing my chest." He chuckled, pulling on a few more shirts in quick succession, tossing them into the bag closest to him, since they didn't fit all that well. "I hope whoever gets these likes them. Or at least appreciates having new clothing of any kind."

Kyo smirked then pushed himself up, edging into the closet to see what Die was tossing. "I'm sure they will. It's amazing what a new shirt is like to someone who's only got four or five total." He turned and flipped through a few of Die's things, letting out a laugh when he came across a pair horribly striped pants. "Sexy."

"Do not even fucking ask. Some of this stuff fans gave me. I think as a joke in some cases. But I always felt bad, like I needed to keep it, you know? But now... it'll be going to a good home at least."

Kyo snickered and shook his head. "I kept a lot of it but like, in a separate box. I kept telling myself one day I'd do something artsy with it."

"Artsy... right... some of this stuff these people were seriously trolling us." Die picked up another shirt and held it up. "However, sometimes they have badass taste and I adore what they send."

Kyo hummed then looked at the shirt Die was holding. It was black with a silver dragon across the front, the tail of it curling around the back. "Yeah, that one's nice. I've gotten some nice things, but so many of them are either way too big or too small. I don't get it."

"Sizing from other countries makes it really difficult. Most people give me things that are far too small for me, like they can't see that I have broad shoulders or something... I dunno. Or maybe it's a hint."

The vocalist shrugged, reaching out to smooth his hand over Die's shoulders. "Nah, I mean...what do they expect you to do? Turn into a skeleton? It's probably just the same mistakes as with my own stuff." He turned and dug a little deeper into Die's stuff, flipping through a few shirts then jumping and letting out a very unmanly sound as something ran over his hand. "Fucking hell!"

Die backed up a bit, colliding with the wall behind himself. "Oh god, is it a roach?!"

Kyo shook his head and gingerly parted the clothes, positive a giant spider was going to leap out at them. Instead, what he found was something perhaps more offensive than any bug. With a snort, he pulled out a shirt that had fuzzy balls attached to it, one of which that had come loose and provided the sensation of something living as it moved over his hand. "I'm going to burn it...."

Die nearly collapsed on the floor, laughing and shaking his head. "Fuck, baby... we're a pair of idiots."

Kyo tossed the shirt to the floor and laughed, though he had his hand pressed to his chest. "Fucking attacked by hideous fashion...I'm sure the fans would find that fucking hilarious." With a huff, he shoved the offending garment with his foot then settled onto a sturdy storage container. "Jesus..."

"Oh... I'm just glad the DVD guys don't invade our houses, or else we'd have just totally made the fucking cut on level of dumbassery."

Kyo's nose wrinkled up at the unpleasant thought of a camera crew in his home. He shook his head and held up his hand. "Never...they may never come here...especially while we're likely to be attacked by fuzzy balls of yarn."

The snort Die gave was anything but attractive, ending in him coughing as he rummaged through a few more shirts, trying one and then sliding a few over to save in the closet because he knew he loved them anyway.

Kyo watched Die for a minute then stood, stepping out of the closet, his hand brushing over Die's back as he did. "I'm going to make us some coffee, want anything else?"

"Mmm... coffee is good. That's all for now." Die moved to get some of his pants where he could see them, starting to sift through those.

Kyo nodded and headed out and downstairs to make the coffee. He got it going then took care of feeding and watering the animals. When the coffee was finished, he poured them both a cup then went back upstairs. "Here, it's that French vanilla blend you like." He handed Die his cup then settled on the edge of the bed for now, sipping his own.

Die took the cup and settled back, stretching slightly as he peered at the other. "Any good dreams or at least inspirational ones?"

Kyo cocked his head and thought about it for a moment before shrugging. "It seems like maybe I dreamed about a live, but I can't recall anything particular about it."

"Mmm... I couldn't sleep again," Die murmured, shrugging a little. "So I did this instead. I'm not sure what the deal is, but I think this is better than the other options.

Kyo's brow creased a little, his expression turning vaguely worried. "I guess so...but...if you're not sleeping, you're not resting." He took another sip of coffee then shifted forward to set the cup on the floor. "And when you're not resting...I'm not."

Die's head jerked up, and he frowned at Kyo. "I'm sorry, love. I try to stay in the bed long enough to try to let you get some rest."

Kyo shook his head. "I don't mean to make you feel guilty, babe...I just get worried when you're not there." He smiled a little. "Besides, I need your butt to keep me warm."

Die snorted. "Yes, because there's so much of it."

Kyo laughed and stood up, moving over to the closet again to wrap his arms around Die's middle. "There's enough of it for me..."

"Damn good thing, because it doesn't grow even if I do." He reached to pat Kyo's ass. "And then there's your ass, which is just fuckin' amazing."

Kyo chuckled softly, wiggling his ass lightly. "I know, you remind me often...and I like it." He grinned then leaned up to kiss Die, taking his time to enjoy his lover's coffee flavored mouth. When he pulled back, he smirked then nodded to the closet. "Are you gonna go into the very back?"

"I already did my part back there, started in the pits of hell first." He laughed and shook his head a little.

Kyo huffed out a laugh then nudged the giveaway bag with his foot. "So, what was the worst thing you've found so far?"

"That sweater you had an encounter with and that terrible pair of pants." Die put his coffee down on a shelf and went about trying on a few more pairs of pants, keeping one and tossing the other.

Kyo made a face at the mention of his sweater encounter. "Could've been worse, I suppose. Do you remember that one shirt that a fan gave you years ago? She'd written your name with hers and little hearts all over it. I think she even drew a wedding cake or something."

"Oh god." Die winced a bit. "I didn't even know how to respond to that." He shook his head. "Creepy, that's what. Speaking of which, I've got Kuroo cleaning my email again for a while, some girl has been sending me pictures, and I'm not even sure she's legal."

Kyo gave a slight shudder at the thought then raised an eyebrow. "Oh? What kinda pictures...and why didn't you mention this before?"

"Fucking nude photos, and I didn't because if I told you every time I got nudes of some chick, that's all we'd ever talk about. But this one is particularly creepy, so I'm having him go in every day and remove them so I don't have to see any of it." Die shrugged a little.

Kyo looked vaguely disgusted and shook his head. "Gross...I'm jealous, though. No one ever sends me their nudes."

Die stared at Kyo for a few moments and then snorted. "Oh... I bet they do. You do realize the staff still cleans your inbox for you before you get to your mail, right? They never stopped since way back when you quit answering it entirely."

Kyo blinked then tilted his head. "Huh...haven't really thought of it, to be honest. Though, I have wondered why I never got anything creepy anymore." He shrugged. "They can keep cleaning it. I don't relish seeing underage tits or some dude's spunk on a picture of my face."

Die nearly choked on a sip of coffee at the last one. "Oh, do tell me someone actually did that."

Kyo huffed and nodded. "Yeah, several years back...this dude sent me like five different pictures of my face from magazines that had all had jizz on them."

"Fuck, man... I never get dudes trying to hit on me. Always fucking strange-ass girls." He shrugged. "Apparently it's some sort of 'thing' to hit on me among certain groups... or so I've been told."

Kyo snorted. "I don't think he was hitting on me so much as just being fucking creepy." He shifted then looked at Die oddly. "A 'thing' to hit on you?"

"Some college girl thing, apparently it's like... cool or something to hit on me. I don't even know. Last one said something about older men, which made me feel real fuckin' great, ya know?" He smirked a bit and rolled his eyes. "I mean, I ain't Yoshiki yet."

Kyo let out a laugh. "If you ever become Yoshiki, I'll kick your ass."

"Then I promise not to become old lump on a log."

"Good. Now, how much do you have left to clear out?"

"Like twenty more pairs of pants, my shorts, and then the drawers out there, I guess." He tied up another bag and then shoved it out of the closet, making three so far. "How do I accumulate this shit?"

Kyo raised an eyebrow then laughed. "Damn, you can't blame all of that on fan gifts...I think you like to shop too much." He finished off his coffee then nodded towards the closet. "How much of that is Chrome Hearts?"

"More than I'm proud of," Die returned with a laugh. "But at least most of it is at least three years old at this point, and a good chunk of that from a few years before that even."

"That's good, at least...we could be a lot worse, I think. New clothes for every day of the year..." He snorted then shrugged. "I'm just glad you're not obsessed to the point of bankrupting us."

"Uh... no." Die thumbed at the house. "This tried real hard though." He shrugged and then trudged to the dresser, plopping down and opening the bottom one. "Holy god what is this stuff even?"

Kyo looked around their room then smiled, moving over to sit next to Die. "It was worth it....and I have no idea." He peered into the drawer, seeing a seemingly random assortment of clothing. "Is that...a strap on?"

Die blinked down at it and then pulled it out of the drawer. After a moment, he turned bright red and dropped it back in. "Oh. My. God." He scrunched up his face and groaned. "It's like the sixth layer of hell."

Kyo stared at it then laughed. "Indeed it is....so better dig in now, and get it over with."

Die heaved out a sigh and began pulling things out. Various pairs of panties and things that looked sort of like parts to his old costumes. He separated things, keeping the old parts of costumes and then frowning at a few things that didn't look like his at all. "What the fuck did we do? Shove all our sordid pasts in here?"

Kyo eyed the panties and costume bits curiously then peered into the drawer, his cheeks flushing a bit as he spotted something that was definitely his and not Die's. "Apparently." He reached out and picked up a spiked cock ring.

Die chuckled and rooted around a bit more, finally just dumping all the rest on the floor and then taking a trash bag and shoving in all the random bits of his past except the costume pieces and tying it up. "Burn that shit or something."

Kyo hummed in agreement, rescuing one pair of red lacy panties from the bag. "We need to burn that, those pants and that evil sweater."

Die eyed the panties. "Are you entirely aware those are likely not even mine?"

Kyo looked at them and shrugged. "They can be washed..." He left it at that and opened the next drawer up, finding a mix of old tank tops and various socks that didn't have mates as well as a few old phones and chargers. "Weird...why didn't we just throw those out?"

"Apparently we are pack rats." Die shrugged, rescuing a tank top and then dumping most of the rest into an extra bag to give away.

"I don't remember being a pack rat when I lived alone. I think it's all your influence." He grinned then grabbed one of the phones, pushing the power button to see it would come on. When it actually did, he gave a little surprised sound then started going through the contacts to see who it used to belong to. With a laugh, he turned it and held the device up. "So who was Keiko?"

Die eyeballed the phone and then gagged a bit. "Burn it with fire. And if you really want to know, the answer is random slut."

Kyo snorted and turned it back around, finding the pictures section and flipping through it. "Nice dick...I don't think that's yours...it's too dark to tell though...wait, is that Kaoru's bedroom?"

Die was rooting through the remaining stuff when Kyo spoke up, and he looked up, clearly alarmed. "What the fuck? I promise you, I was not doing anything with any men back then. What the hell is someone else's dick doing on my phone?"

Kyo shrugged and held the phone out again. "No idea...maybe it was a prank or something. If it was taken at Kaoru's, chances are everyone one involved was smashed."

Die took the phone from him and peered at the photo, shrugging a little. "No idea. But those are his things in the background for sure."

"That's not Kaoru though...and I'm pretty sure it isn't Toshiya. Maybe it's…wait..." He took the phone back and looked at it before letting out a laugh. "It's fucking Boss."

Die snorted. "I must have left my phone unattended at some point. And then never noticed I had a cock pic. Wow."

Kyo chuckled. "That's amusing as fuck..." He thumbed through a few more pictures before finding one of himself giving a cheeky grin, his hand up in a peace sign. "I don't remember this at all. It looks like Kyoto, though."

Die chuckled softly and then nodded. "Yeah, it was. I still have that on my computer."

Kyo smiled a little then finally set the phone aside. "Do you have all of those pictures like that saved?"

"I'm pretty sure I dumped them on my computer before tossing the phone in there." He shrugged. "That one I know for sure because it's in my Kyo file." He winked. "A file all your own."

Kyo had turned to look through a few other things before his head snapped back around. He stared at Die for a moment then blushed. "You have...a Kyo file?" he questioned softly.

Die chuckled. "Yes, and if you delete it, I will be so fuckin' mad at you. I've kept like... everything... for all the years I've known you."

Kyo shook his head. "I would never delete it...I...I'm almost afraid, but I kind of want to see it someday..."

"It's not as creepy as it sounds. I'm not like... collecting other people's pictures of you or something. I just have the things we've taken together or that you've sent, or I took of you like that one."

With a soft laugh, Kyo scratched the back of his head. "I figured but...I just...I dunno. I guess I just didn't expect you to have kept that stuff. I mean, I kept yours, too....but...I don't know." He flailed a little. "Never mind."

Die smiled a little. "I'm a hopeless romantic."

Kyo returned the smile. "You're hopeless, alright..."

Die stuck his tongue out at the other and then shook his head. "Yeah... well, you knew that before you got involved, which makes it entirely your problem."

Kyo let out a loud laugh and reached over to tweak Die's side before standing up pulling open the next drawer. This one was apparently something they'd randomly tossed together as it was fully of papers, some CDs and several notebooks. "Why isn't this with the office stuff? Did we get drunk when we were unpacking?"

Die snorted. "No, remember, the movers unpacked most of it for us. I guess they just couldn't find a place to put some shit, and this turned into a junk dresser." He scooted closer and began sifting through one side of it. "Holy hell... there's fuckin' demo CDs in here." He pulled a few out carefully and put them down next to him.

Kyo blinked then scratched his head. "Oh yeah...you're right. No wonder this is all fucked up." He peered over at the demo CDs with slight disdain. "I don't want to hear them...I sounded worse then than I did a few months ago." He huffed and started going through the papers, tossing a few notebooks and journals to the floor.

Die rolled his eyes. "If you throw them out, I will be deeply hurt. I happen to like listening to our base-lines as inspiration sometimes. These were my copies anyway." He turned one over and pointed at the label, his name printed on it. "See?"

Kyo glanced to see Die's name on the label and snorted. "I wasn't gonna toss them, but still..." 

When Kyo started in on tossing journals and notebooks around, Die reached to sort of straighten them up, tilting his head a little. "Poetry stuff?"

Kyo turned a bit and looked down at the notebooks and stuff, shrugging. "No idea, look inside, and see...I don't think there's anything in there that I care if you read or not..."

Die shrugged, picking one up and flipping it open. The first one was filled with little doodles, obviously some of Kyo's starter attempts as drawing. Smiling, Die placed it carefully back down and then reached for one that was clearly a bit more geared toward writing given it had lined paper.

Opening it, he began through the various entries, sort of speed-reading as he flicked through the pages. There was a lot of Kyo in it, sorrow and pain, a few happy moments... even an entry about Die himself and how Kyo was worried about him. Die stroked the page, a sort of contemplative look on his face. "This is from 2002, and you... you wrote about how worried you were about me, but you couldn't figure out what was wrong." Die looked up at him. "Do you know now what it was?"

Kyo stopped what he was doing and bent down to peer at the page, trying to remember. "Ah...yeah. I think so. You were really withdrawn."

Die nodded a little. "I uh..." he gestured, "Well, you just experienced something close to it in the past few months. This wasn't quite as bad as it was then... but close." He went back to flipping through the pages, wincing a few times and chuckling at others. 

And then, rather abruptly, he stopped flipping and began to actually read. By the time he was done, his cheeks were flushed, and he quietly closed the journal, looking up at Kyo, clearing his throat as he discretely moved the journal to cover the rather prominent tent in his pants. "Uh... wow, Kyo."

Kyo frowned slightly, reaching out to give Die's head a soft pat before he started going through the papers, separating them into different piles. He had just about gotten the drawer looking neat when Die spoke up again, and he turned back around, his eyebrows shooting up at the look on his lover's face. "Uh....what did you find?"

Die wetted his lips, a little smirk forming on them. "Porn. You fucking wrote erotica. I'm not sure if it was the truth, or if you just wanted to pen out what got you riled up, but Jesus fuck, man."

Kyo blinked then took the notebook from Die, reading over the page before letting out a soft sound. "Fucking hell...I didn't write this...but it's a true account..." He flushed a little, shifting on the spot.

Die coughed and then chuckled slightly. "Former lover?" He peered at the page again and then leaned back against the side of the bed, his hips pushing up a little. "That's some truly inspirational kinky shit."

Kyo eyed Die, feeling his own arousal welling up. "Yeah, his name was Ken or Gen...or something.." He knelt down on the floor, eyes still on Die. "That sort of thing turns you on? I mean...even knowing it was another guy? I had him tied up for hours in those ropes...completely at my mercy."

Reaching out, Die reached out and attempted to urge Kyo onto his lap, a low rumble of a groan issuing from him. "It's fuckin' hot. I don't care who it was or that it was someone else. It was before me, and that's fuckin' life. But knowing you liked to take as much control as you like taken from you... that's hot." He planted his hand firmly in Kyo's hair and tilted his head back a bit forcefully, leaning in to nip at his neck. 

Kyo let out a soft groan as Die pulled him into his lap, his hands going to rest on Die's shoulders. "I did like it, a lot...I always came hardest when jacking off to thoughts like that."

"Tell me," Die licked over his Adam's apple, "what else," a little bite to the sensitive area under his jaw, "you've been keeping from me, you little pervert." He pulled Kyo against him, arching up a bit, letting him feel how hard he was.

Kyo shuddered at the nips and licks to his neck, his own pants growing rather tight. "A-ah...a few things." He took a moment to grind his hips down, an erotic sound sliding from his lips. "Mostly watching people...." He ran his hands down Die's chest. "I used to watch people masturbate and fuck in their cars..."

Die's hips jerked a little at the last admission, his mouth attaching to Kyo's ear and sucking rather harshly before he let it go and nuzzled into Kyo's hair, breathing in his scent. "You actually watched them? Like... how close?" He grabbed Kyo's ass and squeezed for a moment. "Did you jack off while you watched or...?"

Kyo growled lowly at Die's actions, his hips jerking forward, the tent in his pants matching Die's now. "Hnng...like, as close as I could without joining them...and yes, I jerked off." He leaned back slightly and smirked a bit. "The best times were when I could time it just right and cum at the same time as the other people."

"Oh my god, you're so fucking dirty," Die growled out, obviously quite turned on by this fact. He grasped Kyo's hip and placed his other hand on the middle of his back. He rolled them over and pressed Kyo to the floor, urgently grabbing his hands and pulling them up over his head as he went back to attacking Kyo's neck and collarbone. "Tell me more... I need to know."

Kyo let out a grunt as he was flipped over. He squirmed against Die slightly, letting out a breathless moan. "O-oh...uhm...there was one couple that was particularly hot." He bucked his hips, his hands flexing a bit. "Man and woman...or so I thought. 'She' was wearing a skirt and had great big tits but when that skirt was pulled up, 'she' also had a great big cock. They fucked for nearly an hour. I ended up cumming twice, all over my pants and steering wheel."

Die groaned, jerking his hips against his lover. "Fuck, baby... god, what if someone had seen you?" he asked, sounding more than a bit turned on by that idea.

Kyo took a moment to simply rock his hips up against Die's, his breath coming out in little pants. "I think I was seen once or twice...but I was watching them...so we had an equal understanding at that point..." He licked his lips then looked up at Die. "Then, perhaps my most scandalous act....was laying in the hotel room next to yours, listening to you fuck whoever while jerking off to it…"

That really got Die's attention. He kept his head bowed to hide the look of surprise, nipping at Kyo's shoulder after a moment and then shifting to sit up, his hands still holding Kyo's over his head. A little smirk slid over his lips. "Was it intentional, or did you just get off on how loud it was?"

Kyo let out a little whine, squirming under Die more. "It was fully intentional...which is why it felt so fucking dirty..."

Die leaned down and hissed in his ear, "When was it?" his hips slowly starting to grind against Kyo's again.

Another sound of pleasure left Kyo's lips as he eagerly moved against Die. "I did it several times...the most recent was a couple of years ago." He smirked a little. "I still don't know if you were with a guy or girl that time...but fuck you were intense."

Arousal slammed through Die so hard it was nearly painful. Shifting Kyo's hands to one of his own, he reached down, unzipping his pants and freeing himself. He gave his cock a few harsh strokes and then began tugging at Kyo's pants, intentionally making slow work of it. "What did you hear?"

Kyo glanced between them and moaned, bucking up a little as Die took his time with his pants. He wriggled his hands some then stopped, just leaning his head back. "Lots of things....mostly the sweet sinful sound of your voice as you came." He let out a low chuckle. "Not to mention the various commands you were giving. 'Spread your legs. Suck my cock. Tongue my asshole.'"

Die nearly choked, his head snapping up to look at Kyo. "Oh my god, was I fucking wasted?"

Kyo shrugged a bit and smirked. "Not sure. I couldn't tell...I was too busy fucking myself with my fingers to pay attention."

Die shivered slightly at the mental image of Kyo going at himself in the room next to the one he was randomly fucking someone else in. He knew from the ways Kyo had said he was talking that he'd been with a man, not a woman and that surprised him a little. He finally got Kyo's pants down to his knees and - frustrated - he pulled his other hand away, hissing out, "Stay," as he pulled back and yanked them the rest of the way off, pushing Kyo's thighs apart and settling between them again, his hand going back to hold his lover's in place. "I only ask for... uh... things like that... when I'm really drunk."

Kyo watched Die's face, loving the arousal he saw there. He smirked a bit when Die told him to "stay" but did as he was told, lifting his ass to assist Die with his pants. Once his cock was free to the air, he let out a moan, his length bobbing slightly. "Mm, I see...you don't have to be drunk to ask me for those things..."

Die let out a little groan and then leaned down to lick at the spot under Kyo's jaw again, liking the taste of him there. "Mmm... most of it, but... the last bit... I don't ask for that very well when I'm sober." He let out as he finally shifted in close enough to slide just the tip of his cock against Kyo's own, nothing else touching.

Kyo moaned out his pleasure at being licked there, his head tilting slightly. He longed to tangle his fingers in Die's hair but settled for squeezing his hands into tight fists. "I noticed..." He chuckled then let out a near pitiful whine as Die's cock slid against his. "Fuck Die..."

Die gave a few more bucks of his hips and then breathed out a little whimper. "God this is torture." But a moment later, he was just doing it again, shifting enough to find Kyo's nipple with his lips and start sucking on it.

Kyo huffed out a laugh. "More so for me than you." He arched upward, needy for contact. Die's mouth closed around his nipple and he growled lowly. "Fuck, Die..." He laid there for a moment then glanced down at his lover. "Bite it," he requested softly.

"Was that a request or a demand," Die returned easily, his hips shifting a little, slipping the head of his cock over Kyo's partially exposed tip, groaning at the feeling of it, both of them a little slick with pre-cum.

"It was whatever you want it to--Ah, Gods...fucking tease," he groaned out, his length twitching against Die's.

"Not tease... I bet I can get you off like this," Die breathed out, flicking his tongue over Kyo's nipple and then nipping softly at it in the same moment he jerked his hips to more fully brush their cocks against one another. In the next moment, he was back to what he was doing before, switching to the other nipple instead.

Kyo shuddered, pulling his hands a little more insistently as Die's actions caused a cry to spill from his lips. "Hnn, I'm not going to deny that..." He spread his legs more, pushing up against Die, eager for more contact.

"Stop that. I'm dictating this." Die bit hard at Kyo's nipple, but not hard enough to actually damage.

Kyo full out whined at Die's reprimand. It was turning him on something fierce to have Die in control like this, holding him down on the bedroom floor. "I'm sorry...I'm finding it a little hard to hold still..."

"You'd better be," Die returned easily, shifting himself into an easier position and then taking up rubbing just the head of their dicks together again, concentrating on how it felt for a little while, not doing anything else, just breathing and feeling.

Kyo grunted then closed his eyes, taking a deep breath to back his lust down a bit. He did as Die did and focused on just feeling, soft moans issuing from his lips every so often. Eventually, he let out a low moan of Die's name, his body shivering.

Die continued their little session for as long as he could, alternating between simply feeling and giving Kyo a little more to work off of by sucking at his nipples or that lovely spot under his jaw. But soon enough, he was nearly trembling with how aroused he was, his cock jumping each time he slid it along Kyo's, still only giving Kyo's cock the feel of his against the head, but allowing Kyo's length to drag over the first few inches of his own.

Even though it was pure torture, Kyo was loving this, a lot. He tossed his head from side to side, moaning and squirming beneath Die with increased frequency, his hips jerking upward. "Die...please...," he begged, needing more, his cock painfully hard by then.

Taking pity on Kyo when he actually begged, Die shifted himself down on Kyo a bit more, fully sliding them against one another, his breath coming in quick pants, nearly ready to lose it. When Die finally gave him more friction, he let out a loud moan. He bucked his hips in the neediest of manners as he panted. He was so close he could taste it.

Die debated telling Kyo not to move again but decided against it. Instead, he slid his hand off of one of Kyo's and moved it to wrap around his throat instead, slowly closing his fingers around his windpipe, jerking his hips a bit faster, just waiting on Kyo to cum before he could.

Die's hand closing on his throat pushed Kyo over the edge hard and fast. Within seconds, he was gasping as he arched upwards and started to cum, thick ropes of white spurting out onto his stomach, his free hand clawing at the floor as he shuddered with his orgasm.

Die gasped at how effective it was, moving his hand and pressing himself down hard against Kyo, nearly rutting against him as he started to cum as well, moaning as he shoved his mouth over Kyo's own, kissing him harshly.

As soon as Die began to cum, Kyo dug his fingers into his hair. He returned the kiss with equal passion, moaning against his lover's lips as he rocked against him. Die rode it out, finally settling and breaking the kiss to gasp for much-needed breath. "Hnng," he hissed out, a soft laugh escaping him.

Kyo took in a deep breath then slung his arm around Die's shoulders, groaning softly. "Die...you're fucking amazing."

Leaning down, Die kissed Kyo's cheek and then sat back, reaching for the tissues on the nightstand, pulling the box down and tugging out a few to wipe up with, tossing the box next to Kyo so he could do the same. "As are you."

Kyo grinned then sat up, grabbing a few of the tissues and mopping up the mess on his stomach. He balled them up and tossed them into the trash can before flopping back against the bed with a huff. "So much for cleaning, eh?"


	58. Chapter 58

Things had been relatively calm in between concerts. Die did his show as usual, moving the day in accordance with some of their tour dates that didn't accommodate for it. When they finally got a few days in between where they weren't needed somewhere else, Die found himself in the bathroom, a box of red hair dye in his hands and a smile on his face.

Kyo had been busy for the last several days with their tour things as well as his own little side projects. He'd also been spending a lot of time vocal training and such, determined to keep his voice in the best condition. He'd been at one of the sessions all day and was finally home. He made his way inside and headed upstairs, calling out to Die. "Babe? Where are you?"

Die had just snapped on his gloves, a towel around his shoulders, and was dumping the contents of the bottle of dye into a plastic bowl. "Up here!"

Kyo followed Die's voice to their bathroom, stopping when he got to the door. "Oh ho, what have we here?" He grinned widely, peering at the box on the counter. "Mm, gonna be my sexy redhead again? You know your brother's gonna be so offended you didn't let him do it..." He chuckled and stepped in, slipping behind Die to hug him from behind, being careful of the dye and such.

Die grinned at Kyo. "I am... and... well, tough shit. I asked if he was busy today, and he said swamped, so that's his deal." He leaned back into the touch and made a kissy face, trying to obtain some lip lockage from the other.

Kyo snorted and shifted around so he could kiss his lover, getting a good groping of his ass in while he was at it. When he pulled back, grinned up at Die then moved to shut the lid of the toilet, settling on it. "So, gonna do it all over or streaks or what?"

Die shrugged a little. "It doesn't have bleach, so the places where my black is coming out already a bit will end with a red tint. I think it'll look neat that way." He wiggled his bottom toward him a little and then grinned.

Kyo hummed then reached out to swat said bottom. "Sounds like a plan." He leaned back, stretching a little, waiting on Die to get on with it.

After the swat, Die got down to work, starting to put the dye in his hair, making a face. "This stuff stinks so much more when it's in our bathroom," he murmured.

Kyo watched then wrinkled his nose, nodding. "Yeah, it's really strong." He stood up and opened the small window over the tub, letting in fresh air. 

After he'd sat back down, his folded his hands together and looked up at Die. "So...I've been thinking...."

Die looked over at him and then looked a bit stunned. "Oh? About?" He painted some more dye in his hair, being very careful about it.

Kyo shifted a bit then cleared his throat. "Well, about our....wedding." He licked his lips, looking a little nervous.

Die looked like he was about to piss himself, his face morphing between a range of emotion before he schooled it back and then quietly asked again, "Oh?"

Kyo rubbed his hands together and then coughed again, his knee bobbing up and down. "Well, I was thinking...and it's fine, really if you don't like this idea...but I was thinking that we could....uh....have a ceremony here...and then do the legalities in…Canada...instead of trying to do the whole thing in another country."

Die's eyes lit up, and he stared at the other in the mirror his mouth slightly open. He bit his lip and then grinned. "Yes."

Kyo blinked slightly then smiled softly. "Yes? You think that's okay, then?"

Die nodded as he added a little more dye, brushing it into his hair. "I love that idea. It means our friends can all come, and then we can just make it official when..." he smirked a little, "whenever we visit Canada again." He was thinking of the next time they went, the tour in just a month or so, but he didn't say it, not wanting to push.

Kyo licked his lips, watching Die with the dye. "Yeah, that was...another thing...we'll be going overseas again very soon....and I thought...you know...if we had a few free hours......" He shifted around and shrugged. "I mean, we can take our time with a ceremony and all but....the other part..."

Die very nearly choked on air the moment it was out of Kyo's mouth. He dropped the brush in the bowl and quickly came to kneel in front of Kyo. He slid his hands over the other's thighs and then murmured, "Seriously? Like completely seriously?"

Kyo felt as though he would choke on his own heart and had to swallow a couple of times before he could answer Die. "Y-yeah, why wait, you know?" He let out a nervous laugh and reached out to rest his hands on Die's, becoming aware of the fact that his palms were clammy.

Leaning up, Die caught Kyo's lips with his own, groaning softly as he kissed him somewhere between gently and passionately. "I've been waiting," Die breathed out, his cheeks flushing slightly, "And here we are... god, I love you."

Kyo let out a soft sound as Die kissed him, his hands going to cup his love's face as he returned the gesture. "I…yeah...I love you, too, Koi."

Die kissed him again and then pulled back, going back to picking up the brush and continuing to brush it into his hair. "Now this is for two victories, not just one." He grinned into the mirror.

Kyo let out a shaky breath and laughed at his own nervousness. "Is that all I am to you? A conquest?" He winked at Die in the mirror, letting him know he was joking. "Gods, I can't believe that just happened..."

Die rolled his eyes. "Yeah, sure, just another fuck." He snorted. "Those days are long gone... it's all about love now." He painted more red dye on another part of his hair, smiling. "Honestly... it's the last thing I expected you to bring up tonight. But I couldn't be happier that you did, baby."

Kyo stood, going over to sit on the counter so he could be closer to Die. "The truth of it is...it hit me out of nowhere a few days ago, and the more I thought on it, the more I liked it."

Die finished up the top layer and gathered it up, putting his hair up into a clip and starting to do the next layer. "It'll make things so much easier... and we can have all our friends and family without the expense of taking any of them overseas. It's perfect, and I'm so glad you thought of it."

The vocalist smiled and nodded. "Yeah, and we could invite more people as well…instead of struggling to cut down a massive list." He ran his fingers through his hair, tugging at the strands some.

Die gave up on the brush on the under layers, starting to use his fingers. He frowned a little. "You okay, baby? You're pulling your hair."

Kyo blinked and shook his head. "Ah, yeah, I'm fine...just..." He paused then let out a laugh. "Just suddenly really freaking nervous about the ceremony...It's not like I get up in front of a bunch of people all the time or anything."

Die chuckled a bit. "Sweetheart... we have time with the ceremony, okay? Just... calm down."

Kyo released his hair and nodded. "I know...just...it's suddenly starting to feel real."

"Trust me... I know." Die glopped on another bit of hair dye and ran it through his strands. "Before I proposed... I was honestly freaked out. I kept thinking of all the what ifs... all the things that could go wrong, from bad to worse."

Kyo shifted around a bit, not wanting hair dye on his clothes. "Yeah, I felt the same then, too...and even now I can't help thinking about all of the what ifs..."

"But you know what?" Die looked over at him and then gave him a serious look. "If we can talk about the what ifs... admit they're there... then we're ten steps in front of a lot of people."

Kyo looked up and held his gaze. "You're absolutely right."

"I worry all the time... I panic that someone or something will come between us." He sighed softly and shook his head. "I used to worry the media would find out, and that we'd get in trouble, the label would drop us. I used to worry I wasn't everything you needed... sometimes I still worry that I'm too much of a burden. That you had no idea what you were getting into with my problems." He turned to look at Kyo, pinning up the next layer of his hair. "But all of it has been completely unfounded. Fuck the public, the media... maybe you didn't know what you were getting into, but you're doing a fabulous job of dealing with it. And you know what?" He peeled off his gloves and tossed them in the trash, taking Kyo's hands in his own. "This is us... and we're fucking amazing."

Kyo listened to Die, nodding his head a few times, some of his lover's worries his own. When Die finished, he squeezed his hands tightly and smiled. "You're right. And nothing and no one can stop us." He leaned in and carefully kissed Die on the lips before pulling back.

Die smiled into the kiss, grinning a few moments later. "Mmm... nothing," he murmured quietly in return.

Kyo reached to stroke his hand over Die's cheek then hopped up off the counter. "Hurry up with that so I can possibly ravish you without fear of staining my hands red." He grinned then sauntered off towards their bedroom.

"Oh wouldn't that give the fans something to talk about!" He chuckled. "Die dyed his hair redm and Kyo shows up with red hands. Did he just help him dye it or... more?" He chuckled, plunking down on the toilet.

Kyo laughed from the doorway, turning around to stick his head back in. "Scandal hits DIR EN GREY, Kyo caught red handed!"

Die started laughing, shaking his head and then letting out a fake gasp. "The horror!"

Kyo cackled and shook his head, turning and heading back out. He made his way to their bedroom and got out of his clothes, tugging on some comfortable pajama pants for the moment. He flopped onto the bed and stretched out, simply waiting for Die to be finished.

It was nearly forty-five minutes before Die finally got into the shower and started to wash out the hair dye, humming under his breath as he washed the red dye down the drain.

Kyo had dozed off in the meantime, finally waking up to a pressing ache in his bladder. Grunting, he pushed himself up and padded back to the bathroom, tapping on the door. "Die, gotta piss."

"Then get in here, and do it," Die returned, laughing softly. "I'm just rinsing out the dye, that's all."

Kyo snorted and walked into the bathroom, going to the toilet and opening the lid. He fished out his cock and leaned over the bowl, groaning as he started to go. "Ahhh...had too much water..."

Die bit his lip, keeping his head out of the spray, waiting and listening while Kyo took a piss. He shivered a bit and then chuckled. "So how was training today?"

Kyo finished up and shook off, tucking himself away then going about rinsing his hands. "Mm, tedious as fuck...and I was distracted so I kept going off key and shit."

"Distracted by what?" Die quickly leaned back to rinse again and then finally grabbed the little bottle of shampoo that came with the dye, pouring the contents into his hands, starting to scrub his hair.

"Mm, thinking of you and our wedding, mostly." He leaned against the counter, yawning widely. "A few of those what ifs we mentioned, and then my hair kept getting in my eyes, so I kept entertaining thoughts of finding the nearest pair of scissors and sheering it off."

"So fuck with it..." Die chuckled. "I just freaked out the whole fandom going all short and black with mine." He leaned back and let the water rinse everything out for him.

Kyo hummed, turning to look in the mirror, flicking the strands around. "Maybe...."

Die leaned back out of the spray and looked behind him to see the water running partly clear. He sighed and reached for the conditioner.

Kyo stood there for a minute then opened the drawer, pulling out the set of clippers and plugging them in. "I bet the fans would be amused that we still do our own hair a lot," he stated, setting the right length on the clippers and then turning it on. He leaned in and began buzzing his hair off, watching to make sure he got it all even.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Die returned, leaning back to wash the conditioner out of his hair. He quickly soaped up a rag and then washed himself down.

Kyo finished up his hair quickly, running his hand through it to get all of the excess out. He adjusted the clippers and fine-tuned it a bit then put them away before going to grab the little broom and dust pan from the cabinet. After sweeping up his mess and tossing it, he settled back against the counter, feeling lighter and better already.

Die finished up, relieving himself down the drain before he turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. He pulled a towel from the rack and scrubbed his hair a bit before he wiped his face and then started down his body, glancing up. "Holy fucking shit," he laughed as he stared at Kyo's new haircut. "Took me literally, I see."

Kyo grinned at Die, running his hand over his head. "Yep, and I can see some of the red already. I like it. I've always loved you as a redhead."

"Good... because we both know how I feel about red." He winked at the other and then shifted around him, finishing drying and dropping the towel in the hamper. He lightly tugged Kyo's hand. "C'mon."

Kyo chuckled and followed along with Die. "Mmhmm, if I didn't think the world would collapse, I'd be tempted to put red tips or something in my own hair..."

"I think it might implode. And to be perfectly honest," Die offered, "I don't think red was really your color." Teasing, he turned and stuck out his tongue, waggling his tongue a bit. "Only when you're wearing me."

Kyo snorted and caught Die by the hip, pushing him against the door of their bedroom. "Mm, is that an invitation to wear you, Daisuke?" He leaned in and nipped Die's bottom lip before pulling back and grinning.

Die let out a soft groan as Kyo pushed him against the door. "Damn right it is," he returned, a little smirk on his lips.

Kyo chuckled lowly, leaning in to kiss Die deeply, his hands sliding down his sides. "Mm, invitation accepted."

The grin on Die's face was one that just wouldn't quit. His eyes lit up as Kyo spoke to him, just leaning against the door and smirking at his lover. "Mmm... if it's so accepted, then how about you show me the time of my life. Enact everything you want on me, baby."

Kyo smirked, sliding his hands down over Die's hips then around to cup his ass cheeks, pulling him close. He tilted his head to run his tongue over Die's Adam's apple, pausing to suck there as he pressed against his lover.

Die tilted his head back for Kyo to have better access, moaning as the other started to lick over his Adam's apple. "Oh my god," he whispered, his hand sliding up to try to hold onto Kyo's hair. He found nothing and let out a whine, settling them on his shoulders instead.

Kyo chuckled at Die's whine, grazing his teeth over his neck then pulling back, looking up at his lover. He grinned before leaning in, his head dipping lower as he found and sucked one of Die's nipples into his mouth through his shirt, wetting the cloth with his tongue.

A few more seconds of Kyo sucking at his nipple, and Die breathed out a soft groan, closing his eyes and leaning back against the door, just allowing Kyo to explore. Clearly the other was in league for torture for the time being, and that was just fine with Die, just so long as he got some in the end.

Kyo got his fill of torturing Die's nipple then lifted his head, moving to the other one, biting lightly before sucking it a bit. He lifted his head again, grinning. "To the bedroom?"

Die bit his lip to keep in another moan at Kyo's treatment of the other nipple. Something about the whole ordeal was incredibly erotic to him, and he was beyond pleased. When Kyo asked, Die grinned, reaching back and opening the bedroom door stepping inside and gesturing the other through.

The vocalist followed Die into the room and moved to the bed. He stripped out of his clothes, revealing he was already rather aroused from their play. Settling on the bed, he smirked at his lover. "C'mere."

Die closed the door, leaning against it to watch Kyo strip off and settle down. When he issued the command, he walked over, his own cock already hard, standing out from his body in a rather obvious manner as he stood there. "Yes?"

Kyo reached out and grasped Die's length, stroking his hand over it for a moment before reaching with his other hand to pull Die closer by the hip. Once he had him in the right spot, Kyo leaned forward and took his lover into his mouth, taking his time working his way downward.

Instantly, Die's hips pushed forward, moans making their way out of his mouth, louder as the other progressed further and further down on his shaft. "Fuck, Kyo," he bit out, nearly straining toward him.

After a moment, Kyo pulled back and focused his attentions on the head, running his tongue over it and along the underside. As he did so, he wrapped his hand around the base, stroking him slowly. "Mmm..."

It took him a few more moments, and then Die breathed out a groan, his hips canting forward rather abruptly. "Ah yeah... just like that."

Smirking, Kyo looked up at Die as he treated his cock like a lollipop, slurping around the head in an almost obnoxious manner. Finally, he slid his tongue down the length of it, flicking it over his balls then coming back up. He took Die between his lips and began properly sucking him off, his head bobbing at a fast pace.

Die definitely enjoyed the way the other was being lewd about it. The entire idea of Kyo intentionally giving him head in such a sloppy fashion was a complete turn-on. He slid his hand to the back of his neck, watching as he finally started bobbing his head over his dick. "Sometimes," he breathed out, "I want to videotape you so I can save these moments forever."

Kyo glanced up at Die, lifting his head and licking his slightly swollen lips. "Why don't you?" he questioned before once more lowering his head over his lover's length, pushing the limits with his throat and not caring.

Die's heart skipped a beat, and then he cried out, unprepared for the other to have done what he did. He bit his lip and then let it free, whispering, "Because I don't have my phone on my naked body?"

Kyo hummed, bobbing his head for a few minutes before lifting up again. "Do you want to get it?"

Die was sincerely getting into it when Kyo suddenly stopped and asked him the question. Letting out a whine, Die stared at him for a moment and then huffed out a breath. "Yeah..." a soft laugh left his lips as he moved back and then went to go retrieve his phone. 

Once he came back, he had the phone already switched over to video. He came to stand in front of Kyo once again, flicking it on so he'd get the action of Kyo actually coming to take him into his mouth, too.

Kyo chuckled lowly, sitting back to wait on Die to come back. When he did, Kyo smirked up at him, leaning forward once more to lathe his tongue over the head of Die's cock for show then finally took him down his throat, returning to bobbing his head, groaning.

Die shuddered and then let out a loud groan, pushing his hips forward as Kyo took him in. "That's right," he muttered in English for the benefit of the camera, "suck it." He gave Kyo a slightly twisted smirk and then brought the camera down to show a side view of what Kyo was doing.

Kyo cut his eyes to the camera, making a show of pulling almost all the way off Die's cock then pushing his head back down, moaning louder than necessary. He let his eyes slide shut and set up bobbing his head over Die's length, more moans escaping him, his hands coming up to grasp Die's hips.

Die let Kyo go at it for a bit, holding the phone there and recording for the duration of what it'd let him. He quickly saved the video and then tossed the phone on the dresser, reaching down to caress Kyo's cheek. "Do you know how easily that's going to get me off, baby? How quick I'm gonna cum watching that when I'm alone and missing you?"

As soon as Die turned the phone off, Kyo slowed down, flicking his up to gaze at Die. His thumbs moved in circles over his lover's bones, a soft moan issuing from him in response. He was hard and aching, this getting him more worked up than he could have imagined. The idea of Die getting off to it didn't help.

Die's hips canted forward at the touch, his eyelids hooding slightly as he waited for the other to pop up off his dick. After a few moments, he lightly touched his shoulder. "I need more than this, baby. Please."

Kyo complied, lifting his head up, licking his lips. "And what is it you need, my gorgeous lover?" He flicked his tongue over the head of Die's cock once more then sat back on the bed, peering up at him.

Die leaned down, kissing Kyo sweetly on the lips, his mouth ghosting over his cheek to his ear. "I need your needs to be satisfied, too."

Kyo gave a soft sound at the kiss, his hand coming up to stroke over Die's cheek. "Mm, I have a request then..." He turned and opened the nightstand drawer, pulling out lube and a decent sized black vibe. "I want to watch you prep yourself for me."

The way that Kyo looked at him had him going almost instantly. He took the items and slid onto the bed, a smirk on his face. Settling back against the pillows, he spread his legs and shifted slightly onto one hip. He poured lube over the vibrator and then slid it down against his entrance, just holding it there as he turned it on low. A moan slipped past his lips.

Something about the way Die just simply complied with his request made Kyo groan. He slid further onto the bed and turned, lying on his side to watch, his hand sliding down to stroke over his aching cock a few times.

Die let the vibration relax him, finally started to slip the dildo inside. He started to push the dildo into himself, the first notch of it slipping in, where he kept it, slowly rotating it side-to-side.

Kyo shifted almost anxiously, his lip pulled between his teeth as Die pushed the toy inside himself. Unable to stand not touching him, Kyo shifted forward a bit so he could run his hand over Die's side and down, caressing his thigh.

The redhead let out a soft sound as Kyo started to touch him, a smile on his lips as he accepted the other's caress. Turning it up another notch, he pushed it in all the way to the next notch on the dildo, this one slightly larger than the last. He bit his lip and then whispered, "The next one is your exact girth... did you know that, baby?"

Kyo smirked at that bit of information, his hand trailing down to brush over Die's length. "Is that so? Is that why you bought that one?"

"It is," Die returned, a smirk on his lips, "It's also why I can take it like this... I've been trying to take it more and more easily so I can take you with less prep." He slowly started to thrust the toy and then pushed it in to the bit that was 'Kyo-sized', letting out a loud moan, his hips jerking up.

The knowledge that Die was making an effort to make things easier for him made Kyo smile widely. "You're amazing, you know that?" He shifted up onto his knees, watching Die thrust the toy into himself, groaning softly.

Die calmed himself down, slowly starting to thrust the toy in and out, sliding through the stages. He pursed his lips and then murmured, "Thank you, my love."

Kyo hummed, reaching out to grab the lube, pouring a good bit on his cock. He began stroking himself, moaning lowly, clearly getting a bit impatient but still enjoying the show.

Shoving the toy fully in, even to the notch past the one he'd labeled as 'Kyo-sized', he cried out as his hips jerked. "Fuck!"

Kyo bit his lip, just holding onto his cock as he watched Die. "Mnn, that's it, baby. Fuck yourself...get your sweet ass good and ready for my cock."

Die kept up all of his actions, fucking himself until he was nearly ready to cum. Pulling the toy out, he turned it off and hissed out, "Now... fucking now."

By the time Die pulled the toy out, Kyo's cock was rock hard, his balls tight against his body. He wasted no time in moving between Die's legs. He grasped the base of his dick and positioned himself at Die's entrance before pushing into him, immediately beginning to thrust. "O-oh Gods, yes!"

It only took Die about fifteen thrusts before he was completely gone. With a cry, he began to cum, his hips bucking desperately.

With as worked up as they both were, Die's quick release didn't surprise Kyo. He moaned and carried on thrusting, pushing through the clenching of Die's muscles. After another few minutes, he shifted to thrusting in short quick bursts before letting out a loud moan and stilling within Die as he came.

Die clutched onto Kyo as the other worked toward his release, moaning when he knew the other was there. "I love you," he breathed out in that moment, just wanting Kyo to hear it while he was cumming.

Die's words hit him in just the right moment and he slumped down, pressed his face against Die's neck. "I love you, too, Koi." He lay there, panting against Die's neck, his hand stroking over Die's side. "I am the luckiest man in the world to have you."

"I'm afraid... we have to share that title," Die returned, a grin on his lips that just wouldn't quit.

Kyo laughed softly, lifting his head to kiss Die deeply. When he pulled away, his lips held a grin that rivaled Die's. "If you insist..."

Die stared up at him, his eyes sparkling happily. In that moment, he couldn't have been happier.


	59. Chapter 59

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

Things had been fine for nearly two weeks, Die more relaxed than he'd been in a very long time. But then things had spiraled back out of control again, his stress skyrocketing when the lawyers kept contacting him again and again with how the magazine wouldn't take the apology and retract the comments that had been made.

Finally, they'd agreed to run it in a few other magazines, since the first one hadn't wanted to run a story like that. Once they'd come out, management had calmed down and backed off, realizing that Die had dealt with everything basically without them, cleaning up his own mess this go around.

But somehow that hadn't been enough. He'd relapsed twice, finding himself in the bathroom after what should have been a victory dinner, puking his guts out. And the second time had been nearly out of his control, panic spiraling him into sobbing so hard he threw up one night when Kyo had been out of the house. The third time, Die had gone to Kyo, all but clinging to him as he'd made his way through it without incident, Kyo lulling him to sleep with the sound of his voice and the gentle rocking of their bodies. And that... that had been the best relief he'd ever found from his own head, something he clung to in every dark moment of his mind for the rest of the month.

Kyo had gone out for the day, and Die hadn't had anything to do, Kaoru having meetings with the higher ups that he didn't need to involve the other members in for the time being, so they had the day off for once. It was a rare treat and for the most part, the boys used it as a way to get chores done. But Die had completed his rather quickly and then set about cleaning out his email, running a virus check on both his and Kyo's computers, and then starting to clean out the junk from his hard drive that he'd accumulated over the past year and a half since he'd done it.

Curiosity had gotten the better of him and he'd finally gone and gotten the baggie Boss had sent home with them, separating out the pills, all of them being various anti-anxiety meds, and then he'd pulled out the white tissue wrapped item, finding it to be an already rolled joint.

Some part of him felt bad for it, but the rest just wanted the relaxation... and the horniness, given he'd been a bit off in that department for a while now. He hadn't even jerked off in nearly two weeks and hadn't fucked around with Kyo in more than that. Granted, sometimes they went through phases, but for the most part, they fucked like rabbits, and he knew it was worrying the hell out of his lover that he hadn't even been getting morning wood. 

And so, he lit up out on the back porch, just lounging there while he smoked through the joint, letting it relax him into that gentle cradle of oblivion. Once he was done, he came back inside and went right back to cleaning out his laptop, eventually wandering into his porn folder, intending to clean out some of the more raunchy stuff before the tour... just in case. You never knew when you'd fall asleep with it open and someone would find out all your dirty little secrets, after all.

But after a while, even the three or four seconds of the videos just to see which ones they were started to turn him on, his cock achingly hard in his jeans. He knew Kyo was due back soon, but he just couldn't bring himself to wait any longer. His dick was persistent, his balls tight just from the thought of finally getting off again, and he knew even if he did wait, he'd just blow his load so quickly it'd probably be depressing.

Settling at his desk, he selected a video he'd once taken of Kyo slowly sucking his dick off. It was just a crappy cell phone video, but it didn't matter. It was his cock and his lover's mouth wrapped around it, and it turned him on better than any kinky thing he'd ever watched. He set it on repeat and just sat there, working himself up for the first few rounds, not even touching himself.

When he finally, blessedly, gave in, he tortured himself with it, taking his time opening his belt and then sliding his hand down over his clothed erection. And then just sat there, fingers over his bulge but not moving, just watching Kyo's head bob over his cock, listening to his lover's moans around his length. "Fuck, baby," he whispered out to the video, knowing exactly when he'd said it... exactly how he'd felt as Kyo took him in completely.

When the video looped again, he finally opened his jeans and freed himself from the confines of the material, feeling all that much more dirty since he'd neglected to put on any underwear that morning. Licking his lips, he wrapped his fingers around his dick and began to stroke over it, moaning quietly as Kyo lapped at the head of his dick in the video. "Love it when you do that," he whispered out, just like he had in the video.

The past few weeks had been better than the past few months, but worry still ate at Kyo. Die was not coming to him for sex, and he knew for a fact that there'd been at least one slip up with the vomiting. When Die had come to him, distraught and stressed, he'd been both relieved and upset. Relieved because Die came to him instead of giving in, and upset because Die was still having problems. He'd done the best he could do with comforting his lover, thankful it had worked. 

That didn't address Die's libido, or lack thereof, though. Kyo had even tried to tempt him into sex a few times, but Die had put him off in one way or another, something that wouldn't have happened before. These thoughts weighted heavily on his mind as he went about taking care of various matters that had gone neglected while they were busy with their work. His last stop had been the office to drop off some form or another they needed, and then he was finally able to head home. 

Once he arrived, he went about removing his shoes and putting away the pet food he'd picked up before calling out to Die. When he got no answer, he frowned and headed upstairs, hearing sound coming from their office area. 

He moved towards it, stopping in the door when he heard Die speak, his eyebrows going up. A quick peek inside told him all he needed to know about what was going on. Arousal swept through him hard and fast at the sight that greeted him, his lip clamping on his teeth to keep from groaning.

Die didn't hear Kyo in the least, too focused on what he was currently doing to his dick to even remotely worry about any other sounds in the house. His hips pushed up and he shuddered, his breath hitching as Kyo took his cock all the way in his mouth again in the video. "Uhnnng," he moaned out, completely in sync with the sounds he was making in the video, reliving the feeling of it through the screen and speakers.

He pushed his chair back a little, shifting back in it, the leather creaking as he pushed his hips up, his hand working his cock rather quickly. "Fuck, I'm gonna," he let out, leaning his head back and closing his eyes, the sound of the chain on his pants clinking against the plastic arm of the chair not even stopping him right then. "God, so good..." his hips jerked and his breath caught. He was so close he could taste it.

Kyo watched, barely breathing as Die worked himself into a frenzy. His hand dropped to grope at his own steadily hardening dick, his hips jerking slightly. He was torn between interrupting his lover and watching him to completion, both options quite appealing. When Die started making more noise, he took the opportunity to unbuckle his belt and unzip his jeans, sliding his hand inside with the quietest moan he could muster.

Die was so lost in himself that he didn't hear a thing, though as he spread his legs a little more, his chair shifted in a manner that afforded Kyo a better view of both what was happening on screen and what was happening between Die's cock and his hand.

Kyo shifted against the door frame as Die did in his chair and had to bite back another moan. On the screen, he could see himself sucking Die's cock and somehow, the fact that it was them that had Die so riled up made him feel proud as well as even more turned on than before. 

Gasping, Die grabbed his shirt with his free hand, yanking it up and out of the way mere seconds before he started to cum, shooting rather copious amounts of cum all over his abdomen, the most exquisite of sounds sliding from his mouth, his eyes opening and landing on Kyo in those last seconds. All he did was stare at him as he rode out his orgasm, slowly stroking the rest of his cum from his cock onto his skin. His hips flexed a few times and then he let out a little tiny huff of a laugh, whispering, "Kyo... baby."

He gave his cock a few strokes then dropped his hand, simply watching as his lover finally lost it. He was about to cross the room when Die spotted him. A slight smirk settled on his lips as Die spoke, his cock flexing slightly. "Hey...."

Die licked his lips, pushing his hips up a few more times, giving Kyo the definite once over, smirking for a moment. He leaned back in the chair, sliding his hand up from his cock to run through the mess he'd made on his stomach, a breathy little sigh leaving his lips. "You're hard," he observed, a bit obviously.

Kyo snorted lightly and pushed off the door frame, crossing the room to stand in front of Die, his eyes on the cum painting his lover's belly. "Mm, yes, I am...and you've made a mess," he replied, his tongue sliding out over his lips slowly.

Die bit his lip a little and then turned fully away from the computer, reaching with his clean hand to hit pause on the video. "Care to clean it up then?" he all but purred out, a grin on his lips.

Kyo chuckled lowly, easily sliding to his knees. He placed his hands on Die's thighs and spread them, leaning in and running his tongue over his lover's belly button, gathering a good bit of the cum that had pooled there. Die groaned as Kyo slid his tongue over his sensitive skin, shuddering. "Oh dear sweet fucking heaven," he hissed out, his hand instantly going into Kyo's hair, the look on his face one very near to the look he'd just had when he'd cum.

Kyo's eyes flicked up to Die's face, taking in the expression there, loving it. He shifted and licked over Die's stomach, following the spurts of cum up to his lover's chest. Once he'd finished getting all of it off, he moved to sucking to one of Die's nipples into his mouth, his hands clawing at Die's thighs. "Mmm..."

Die groaned as Kyo attacked his nipple, his hips bucking up a little, his dick still fully hard. He yanked Kyo's head back and bent down, catching his lips and all but shoving his tongue in, knowing Kyo would taste what he'd been doing earlier and not really giving two fucks about it at all.

Kyo growled as Die kissed him, his hand coming up to brace himself on the arm of the chair. He nipped at Die's tongue the sucked on it in a lewd manner, very much the same way he'd been sucking his cock in the video.

By the time Die got his tongue back from Kyo, he was ready to basically shove Kyo over and fuck him into the goddamned table. He ripped his shirt over his head, tossing it aside and wrenched Kyo's head back, nipping along his jaw and then sucking on his Adam's apple for a second, nearly falling out of his chair in the process. Stopping for a second, he growled out, "Bed. Naked. Now."

Kyo let out a hiss of pain at the pull to his hair though his cock throbbed between his legs, pre-cum steadily oozing from the tip. "F-uck, Die!" He tangled a hand in Die's red hair, giving it a harsh tug before staring up at him, snorting at the command. After a few seconds, he stood and turned, heading for the bedroom, losing his clothes along the way. Once there, he crawled onto the bed on his hands and knees, ass in the air, clearly stating what he wanted. "Come fuck me, Daisuke."

Die was up and following him in seconds, leaving his pants forgotten in a puddle of cloth by his desk chair. He was still so hard it fucking hurt, and he knew it was from so much pent up tension... and the drug currently coursing through his system.

He made his way quickly to the bedroom, pausing only long enough to grab lube and slick his cock with it. He tossed it on the bed, just in case, and then slid behind Kyo, holding the base of his cock as he grasped Kyo's hip with the other hand. He shuddered as the head of his length pressed against Kyo's ass. Gently, he tested, pushing forward just a tiny bit to see how the other reacted with no prep.

Kyo turned his head to watch Die enter the room, his eyes focusing on his lover's now slicked up cock. He shifted into a slightly better position then closed his eyes, groaning lowly as he felt Die push against his ass. "What the fuck are you waiting for? Christmas?"

"Fuck you," Die hissed out, a smirk on his face as he pushed in with one forceful thrust, groaning at the way Kyo's walls clamped around him. "Oh holy fuck you're tight."

Kyo opened his mouth to retort but ended up letting out a near scream as Die thrust into him, pain of the best kind searing through him. "God...fuck!" In retaliation, he squeezed his inner walls around Die then relaxed, a shudder going up his spine.

Die's hand tightened on his lover's hip for a second before he moved to swat him harshly on the ass. "Bitch... fucking stop it." He shuddered and then closed his eyes, starting to thrust into Kyo's body, the feeling nearly more than he could take after having just cum. "Holy fuck!"

Kyo jerked his head back to glare at Die at the name. "What the fuck did you just fucking say?" He clamped down again, biting back a moan as Die started to move anyway. 

"I said...bitch," Die returned, growling possessively as he started to actually full-on thrust, unable to hold it back, his rhythm erratic and nothing like usual.

"Fucking shit...Daisuke…" He clawed at the bed, his back arching. "You take fucking Viagra or something?"

Panting, he leaned down over Kyo, wrapping one arm around his middle and holding on as he rutted against him in the most desperate of ways. "N-not that," he offered by way of answering.

Kyo gave a return growl, pushing his hips back roughly against Die. When his lover leaned over him, he reached back and got a handful of hair, giving it a good yank. "Bite me...cunt." He ignored the other comment for now, his brain unable to focus on it.

"Just remember you fucking asked for it," Die snarled out, fucking him harder, finding the bit of un-tattooed skin on his lover's shoulder and biting down on it.

Kyo let out a loud, uninhibited scream as Die's teeth sunk into his skin. He jerked his hips back harshly, then he was cumming without warning, his body trembling with how hard it was. "FUCK!"

Kyo's orgasm was like a chain reaction for Die, something he'd honestly usually had to work at. But this time it came without warning, his own orgasm slamming into him as Kyo's body began to spasm around his cock. He choked out a strange sound and then began to fill Kyo's passage with his cum.

Kyo shuddered beneath Die, his breath coming in harsh pants. He slumped down against the bed, groaning lowly as he felt his lover filling him. "Die..."

Die let out a strained little sound as he pulled out and then slid onto the bed beside Kyo, flopping an arm over his face, his breathing heavy.

Kyo stayed as he was for a few moments then finally rolled over, peering at Die as he tried to catch his breath. "Fucking...hell...Daisuke."

Die moved his arm a little, staring at Kyo in quite the woozy sort of manner, a small smile on his lips. "I... uh... I found my horny again."

Kyo snickered and shifted over to run his hand over Die's chest. "Mmm...obviously." He laid there for a moment then looked up at Die. "Did you by chance find it in herb form?"

Die snorted softly and shrugged, giving a low groan as he moved. 

"Well, wherever it came from, I'm glad...because I fucking needed that."

"Me, too, baby... me, too." Die reached over, pulling Kyo into his arms and curling up against him, closing his eyes. "I love you. So much."

Kyo pressed his lips to Die's chin, smiling softly. "I love you, too, Koi..."


	60. Chapter 60

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

Things had been sort of slow in their lives once they had returned from the overseas tour. Die had done a few more interviews long-distance, and then Toshiya had some photoshoots. But for the most part, they were relaxing a bit before starting in on the new album. He was thankful for the time off, it gave him time to catch up on things he should have been doing all along, but had been neglecting. But eventually, he'd done all he could in those respects as well and grew restless. With that in mind, he'd turned to making a bit more music of his own, things that would probably never see the light of day within Dir en grey.

He did record some of it, just wanting to keep it, maybe as something for a rainy day project, maybe something else. But halfway through trying to process what he had imported into one of his programs, everything started to fuck up on his computer. With a growl of frustration, Die went about trying to figure out what was going on with it. Twenty minutes to no avail, he finally pulled up his virus scanner and set about getting the quick scan up and running. He sat back, fiddling with his phone for a few minutes until it dinged, telling him nothing was found.

But something kept nagging at him, and he knew that couldn't be right. With a huff, he pushed back from the machine and sighed. "Kyo?!" he called out urgently, looking more than a little peeved off at the moment.

As things had slowed down as far as band activities went, Kyo had begun focusing more on his own projects as well. He was currently in the midst of sorting through some of the processed photos he'd snapped while they were abroad when Die's urgent call sent him darting up the stairs.

He made his way to the music room and stopped in the doorway, concern written on his face. "What is it? What's the matter?"

Die huffed out a groan when Kyo came into the room. He pointed at his computer. "Something's wrong with it... I think it might be a virus or something." He pursed his lips a bit, knowing he'd put some stuff on there that he probably shouldn't have had on a work computer, but... that was beside the point. "The scan says nothing's wrong with it."

Kyo blinked then looked at the computer. Sniffing he moved to sit in the chair beside Die's, looking over the scan screen. "Hm, it may need a more in depth scan." He shooed Die out of the way and started pulling up the antivirus's options, selection one that would scan the entire computer from top to bottom. "It'll take a bit...why don't you go to the post office like you were going to yesterday while I play babysitter with it?

Die moved when Kyo shooed him, standing there and staring at it while Kyo fiddled with the options. Sometimes he hated the fact that while he was irrevocably smart in some places, he was also incredibly dumb in others. Like this... he had no idea that the antivirus had more than one setting. But, clearly, Kyo did. For that much, he was at least, thankful.

When Kyo suggested he take a hike to the post office, he nodded. "Yeah... will do. I'll pick up some bunny food, too. I completely forgot it, though at least he's not out yet." He gestured. "Speaking of the pets, can you clean the cat's litter box while I'm gone? The dust has been making me sneeze."

Kyo turned and wrinkled his nose at the request for him to take care of the cat box. "Fine, but only if you stop at the market and bring me back some yogurt."

"Good lord, it's like a circus!" Die chuckled though. "Fine, I think there's a place I can get the bunny food and the yogurt." And beer... he was running low anyway. "Did we need more stamps? Or just to check for that package and send off the one to Mic?"

Kyo snorted, flicking his eyes at the computer then back to Die. "Uh, I don't know about stamps but there was some bill due to be mailed off. It's in the...thing by the fridge. Also, if you get yogurt, get strawberries to go in it."

"Yeah, yeah... I know what you like." Die snorted and waved his hand, turning and heading downstairs. He paused at the top of the stairs. "I tried to save the file I was working on... if at all possible, please don't let it delete it?" With that, he was off down the stairs, taking them two at a time and then skirting past one of the cats to get into the kitchen, grabbing the bills from the caddy, double-checking them, and then finding Mic's package and the notice of attempted delivery on the other one.

Satisfied he had everything, he made his way to the door, shoved his feet in his shoes, laced them up, stuffed everything in a shoulder bag and headed out.

Kyo smirked then waved, turning back to the computer once more. "I'll see what I can do," he called, not looking away. It soon became apparent, however, that it was going to take a while so he leaned back in the chair and closed his eyes.

Sometime later, the virus program dinged rather loudly and obnoxiously, pulling Kyo out of a doze. Huffing, he run his hand over his face and sat up, blinking a few times to get his eyes to focus. Finally, he looked at the screen and read what the program had listed as infected files. Several he immediately quarantined but one caught his eye and he hesitated. "What the hell is 'wedding dp p?'," he uttered to himself, going to find it and click on it. 

The folder had nothing in it except another folder simply labeled "P", which Kyo opened up to ensure it wasn't something important. 

There were a handful of pictures in there, the previews set to icon view so Kyo had no clue what they were. He debated opening them, not really digging the idea of snooping too far into Die's computer, but then the computer dinged at him again, and he went for it, needing to ensure they weren't important.

What he saw upon opening the first picture, however, had him gaping at the screen and wondering what sort of Pandora's box he'd opened. There, lying in the middle of a bed, was Die with what appeared to be the handle end of a baseball bat, covered in a condom, sticking out of his ass. There was cum on his belly and a bottle of lube beside him. Kyo couldn't even comprehend what he was seeing and just out of pure morbid curiosity, he switched to the next picture and got something similar. This one with Die basically sitting on an empty, plastic vodka bottle. "Holy...shit."

Die made all his rounds to the various places he'd decided he needed to go, picking up stamps, the package (which turned out to be his newest set of guitar picks), and then the bunny food, strawberries, granola, and a tub of vanilla yogurt for Kyo. He also picked up some quick sushi and spring rolls, heading home with everything.

Once he got inside, he quickly put things away, being relatively quiet, though the TV in the living room mostly masked the sound of him moving around anyway. Making a face at it, he flicked it off once he was done putting things away and then called out, "Hey, I got us lunch; do you want me to bring it up?"

Kyo was still in a state of shock when he heard Die call out to him. Clearing his throat, he debated on what to do then finally decided he needed to know what had gone down to warrant these pictures. "Uh, no, just bring yourself up here," he called back, switching the pic back to the baseball bat one.

Shrugging to himself, Die put their food into the fridge except one of the spring rolls, which he took a huge bite out of as he shut the door. He make a clicking sound at one of the cats who seemed more interested in his food than anything, shaking his head and then chuckling as he moved through the kitchen. He tore off another bite as he got to the stairs, making his way up relatively slowly, since he had a cat swirling between his feet, making pitiful mewling sounds, trying to get at the food. 

Once he got to the top of the stairs, Die shoved the rest of the spring roll in his mouth and padded across the floor toward where Kyo was seated, still paying more attention to the cat than anything else. "So," he swallowed so he wasn't being so rude, "find the virus? Or is something worse wrong?"

Kyo turned to look at Die, an odd expression on his face before he moved out of the way, the picture on full display on the monitor. "Oh, I found the virus....but...uh...I have so many questions, Daisuke."

Die started to nod at the acknowledgement of having found the virus, but then he looked up, an odd look on his face as he looked at Kyo instead of the screen. But after a moment, he flicked his gaze over to the screen. Instantly anxiety rushed through him, his lips parting as though he had something to say: some words with which to defend himself. But... given the photo on the screen, there was no defending anything, really. It was so obviously him. Granted, it had been taken on timer with a terribly old camera, but there was no second guessing, no explaining away that it was some porn double or something. No, nothing like that would work at all, and besides, he didn't like lying, particularly to Kyo.

Swallowing, he squared his shoulders and shoved his hands into his pockets, shifting somewhat nervously on his feet. "Ah... um..." he finally breathed out, "Oh." As if that explained anything at all.

Kyo gave Die an indignant look. "Oh, indeed...," he quipped, sarcasm lacing his words. "You didn't tell me you were a fan of shoving odd things up your ass, Die...much less particularly large things." He paused then chuckled lowly. "I should've known...."

Die's hands pushed further into his pockets until his anxiety was overly obvious rather than just hinted at as Kyo spoke. Once again, his mouth opened to attempt to somehow defend himself, but nothing came out this time either, though Kyo saved him from looking stupid by speaking up a moment later.

He huffed out a soft sigh and then sighed, pulling one hand free to reach up and pinch at the bridge of his nose. "I... uh... fucking hell." His hand flailed helplessly for a moment before he just huffed out a humorless laugh and shook his head. "Okay, fine... it's something I used to do... like... before I got brave enough to get an actual dildo. And things just... sort of got out of control at a certain point." He made a vague wave to the screen. "That... yeah. I should have deleted them years ago, but... never quite got around to it."

After noting how uncomfortable Die seemed, Kyo closed the picture. "I see. So...wow...not something I ever expected to find..."Kyo was at as much a loss for words as Die was. He wasn't overly offended or upset by the pictures, just shocked more than anything.

Die slid his tongue out over his lips and then gestured at it. "Just... was one of the files in there a virus?"

Kyo nodded, going to look at the virus scan again. "Yeah, it's some weird one labeled with in impossibly huge file name. Viruses like to hide in nooks and crannies a lot, so...it's not surprising, especially if you haven't opened this folder in a while."

Die winced a bit and then nodded. "Yeah... well, not like I stare at myself to get off or something." He tried to break the stiff mood in the room with the crack, finally just shifting over the computer. "Just... whatever it is, quarantine it and delete it. As for those pictures... I don't know how much you saw, but... do what you will with them, should probably delete them off this computer though. I put things on here when my old laptop was about to die and sort of forgot about them."

Kyo snorted softly then turned back to the folder, studied the files for a moment before hovering the mouse over one. "We've been together for this long and yet, you still have little secrets tucked off in there," he murmured, his tone even. He clicked on one of the pictures, bringing it up and looking at it. It was of Die again, spread out on his bed with a fairly large candle wedged up his ass, his cock hard and obviously dripping with precum. 

Kyo leaned back to let Die fully see what he was looking at then let out a little laugh. "That's certainly bigger than my dick..."

Die let out a cough when Kyo pulled up another image and then said it was larger than his dick. He rubbed his palm over his mouth and then down off his chin, dropping it to his side. "Yeah... it was." He swallowed a bit and then offered, "Listen... it's not like I do this sort of thing anymore. It was a long-ass time ago."

Kyo closed the picture and went through the process of quarantining the virus and setting the scanner to repairing Die's computer. Once he'd done that, he closed the folder and turned to look at Die. "I'm getting the distinct impression that you're rather uncomfortable with me seeing this. Want to explain?"

Kyo certainly wasn't wrong. Die's heart was in his throat over the subject, really. He honestly didn't know how to react to Kyo having found things like that and he really was more nervous over the fact that Kyo had brought up the little secrets tucked away bit. 

With a huff of breath, he gestured. "Can we go… like... sit somewhere more comfortable? The living room maybe?"

Kyo stared at Die for a moment, vaguely perplexed with his lover's attitude. He found it difficult to believe Die was still so uncomfortable about certain things with him. Sighing, he nodded, pushing himself to his feet. "Yeah, let's go to the living room. You mentioned lunch anyway, right?"

Die nodded as he turned and made his way downstairs. "Yeah, I brought food for us both." He skirted around one of the cats on the stairs, muttering something about it trying to kill him or something, and then padded off toward the kitchen. He retrieved the other spring roll and the sushi, coming back to the living room with all of it and putting it down. He went back and grabbed two glasses and the jug of green tea from the fridge, bringing that back as well and then plunking down on the couch.

Kyo likewise stepped over the cat then followed Die down the stairs, going on into the living room and settling on one side of the couch. "Looks good, thanks." He picked up a piece of sushi, popping it into his mouth and chewing as he poured them both some green tea.

Die nodded at the thanks for the food, pulling out the one crab roll he didn't mind eating and plucking a piece up with his fingers, shoving it into his mouth. Once he was done eating it, he sniffed and then murmured, "Okay so... I'm sorry that there's still things you don't know from the past. I just sort of... figured if I wasn't doing them anymore then no need to bring them up?"

Kyo reached forward to grab another piece of sushi, picking a veggie roll next. He paused and held it between his fingers as he looked at Die and shrugged. "It's not even that you haven't laid it all out like that...it's more like you're just so incredibly ashamed of them that you're freaking out because I found out. I think that's what gets me the most," he responded.

"I've tried some really fucked up shit in my life, Kyo... like really fucked up. I just... worry that you will eventually be like 'nope I'm out' if you find something that's way too far over the top, you know?" He sighed and then picked up the other spring roll, since he'd basically gotten Kyo more sushi and himself these and a few things he could try sushi-wise.

Kyo sighed and ate his bite, viewing Die with some amount of exasperation. Once he'd swallowed, he sat back and crossed his arms. "Well, then, why don't we go round for round on the weirdest shit we've tried? Just lay it all out instead of letting it fester and rot, waiting to be found by unhappy accident."

For a moment, Die thought about it. And then, finally, he nodded. "Yeah... sure. Okay. Um... well... once I slept with three completely different girls in the same night. Within like... twenty minutes of each other."

Kyo's eyebrow hitched up then he snorted, shaking his head. "That's not weird, that's just slutty...but okay." He reached up to stroke his hand over his chin. "I slept with a guy one night and his brother the next."

Die choked out a laugh and then shook his head. "Seriously? That's impressive as fuck."

Kyo chuckled, reaching to get his tea, taking a sip then settling it back down on the table. "Not nearly as fun as it sounds, to be honest. All in all, their sister was the better lay."

Die had been about to take a drink of his tea, and he was glad he didn't or he'd have spewed it everywhere. "Oh my holy fuck." He leaned back and plain out cackled, just pleased by the idea of the whole thing. "Okay, so... um... less slutty more... weird? Um... are you sure you want some of this while we're eating?"

Kyo grinned at Die, glad to see his lover relaxing a bit. "That was way back in the day." After eating his third piece of sushi, he gave a shrug. "Yeah, I don't care...unless you're gonna tell me you tried scat."

Die made a face and then muttered, "Tried no..." before he awkwardly scratched at his head and sat back again, looking a significantly paler than he had a moment before.

Kyo's head turned to look at Die fully, his eyebrow shooting up. "Looked at?"

"Not the like... disgusting stuff," he muttered out. "But... um... just like people doing it in public, yes. I went through a phase where the whole piss thing was more about the urgency of it than anything else, and I guess... that fell into it. But then it started making me feel sick, so I stopped watching it and have never had the desire to do so again. But god only knows if somewhere my idiot ass saved something, so... there you go."

Kyo considered that for a moment then nodded, rubbing his hands together. "I've admittedly looked at it, too. I couldn't get off on it, though; my dick wouldn't even get hard."

Die stared at him for a moment and then closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he murmured, "Seriously?"

The vocalist shifted, drawing his legs up beneath him. He scratched at his arm and nodded, jerking his shoulder up. "Yep, couldn't even get a rise out of it. I was actually really amused, considering I've gotten off to...uh...gore."

"Like... real or just the animated stuff?" Die seemed to remember he was holding the spring roll and finally bit off a piece of it, putting the rest down for a minute.

Kyo watched and waited for Die to actually swallow before he answered. "Both but I preferred the animated stuff in this case. They could go a lot further..."

This time Die didn't look like he was gonna choke on anything. He, in fact, pretty much had suspected the answer. "Like... how far did the non-animated stuff go?"

Kyo cleared his throat and huffed out a laugh. "Well, there were some pretty deep cuts in a lot of them but the furthest I ever witnessed was them hacking this chick's leg off. It was so damn realistic that I was actually afraid I'd ended up with a snuff film instead. Turns out though, she was actually an amputee already. For a low budget-ish porn though, the effects...and her screams....were pretty real."

Die sort of sat there for a moment trying his best not to gape at the other while he told him of the porn. He licked his lips and then quietly offered, "When I was determined I was still into girls and something was just wrong, I watched some really fucked up shit. There's this... one site... bang bus? Do you know of it?"

Kyo watched Die's face for a moment then broke his gaze to grab the last piece of sushi, placing it in his mouth as the other spoke. "Mm, yeah. I have...," he replied, his hand covering his full mouth.

"Have you... seen stuff off of it or just... about it?" Die looked a little more horrified by the passing second and then ducked his head.

After he swallowed, Kyo took a moment to drink down part of his tea then settled once more. "I've watched more than a couple of the videos..."

"Yeah well... that was... about the start of fucked up shit I watched for a while before I realized I was being... um... someone I wasn't." Die shrugged a little.

Kyo nodded a little, chewing his lip a bit. "I'll be honest. I've been done nearly every road there is when it comes to shit I've watched. Not so much with actually doing, though, but I've been to a few extremes."

Die sat back, feeling a bit more relieved that he wasn't alone in the fucked up porn department. "Okay... once I sort of followed through on... some... of the stuff we talked about earlier. Only once, that was a nightmare I never wish to re-live."

Kyo licked his lips, his nose wrinkling a bit. "Yeah, I have a feeling I know what you're talking about, and I went there, too. An ex-lover of mine was a bit twisted though. So it wasn't really for my benefit."

Once again, Die sort of gaped at him and then huffed out a laugh. "I've been so fucking embarrassed over this shit... and over my piss fetish, and you've already been down way worse roads. Shit... I must be a blessing if uh... they were into... that."

Kyo laughed and shook his head, pushing his fingers through his hair. "I don't know. I mean, of course you're a blessing compared to anything, but...I was just as rough on him...he let me beat the shit out of him once then begged me to fuck his bloody mouth...which I did."

Die sat there for a moment and then murmured, "Do you ever fantasize about beating me up?"

Kyo's expression turned to one of horror, and he shook his head. "Never. Not even once. The worst I've fantasized about when it comes to you is cutting and choking."

"What changed? Like... why did that desire sort of... disappear?" He knew he was fifty questioning his lover, but he could tell him to stop at any moment if he wanted to.

Kyo sighed softly, looking down at his hands instead of at Die. "I was in one of my bad places then, and I was angry, a lot. He liked it though, got off on it...so it became a release." Rubbing his palms over his knees, he cleared his throat. "After I broke it off, I started seeing that one therapist that Boss recommended, and whatever meds he prescribed kicked any urges like that out, I guess."

Die gave a little nod and then slid closer to Kyo, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "You always know if you don't want to answer something... or talk about it... that's fine, right?"

Kyo turned to look at Die, smiling softly and shifting to pull his lover into his lap. "Of course...it's fine, though. I'm not overly bothered by it now. It's sort of...dirty water under the bridge."

The redhead moved so that he was straddling Kyo's lap, settling down and putting his head on his shoulder, sort of all hunched over to do it, but liking it anyway. "Mmm... I think my dirty laundry is out... for the most part. I guess I have some strange things I've done, but for the most part, I think they fall more under slutty than dirty now?"

Kyo shifted around then wrapped his arms around Die's waist, turning his head to press a kiss to the redhead's temple. "Mmm, I suppose so. Just don't get bent out of shape when something else comes up, yeah?"

"One girl had me suck her toes... that was fucking disgusting, and I nearly gagged. Not that her feet were... bad... but... eww." Die let out a laugh and then pushed his face against Kyo's shoulder.

Kyo shuddered at the thought, shaking his head. "I don't do feet. I will massage your feet, I might even kiss them on my way up...but sucking toes? No, thanks." He stroked his fingers through Die's hair, quiet for a minute. "What's the absolute nastiest thing you've licked, fucked, fingered, touched, whatever?"

"Oh god, that's easy. There was this one girl. I was super fucking trashed, and she ended up in our VIP after-party somehow... I guess at the time I just thought she belonged there. Later found out she was a fan and had been in the pit all night before... and let's say I'm not sure she washed for like a fucking week before we fucked. I didn't know how to get out of it once I was in it. So I uh... sort of... went for it fast and had to take a really long shower after. But I almost gagged myself trying to pleasure her."

Kyo listened to Die's story then made a gagging sound. "Oh God, that's awful. Tell me you didn't eat her pit funk pussy?"

"That... is exactly what I was trying to tell you I ended up doing. See... I was always a man who tried my best to make it worthwhile for every person I was with." Die shrugged. "Even when completely fucking bombed."

Kyo wrinkled his nose, almost feeling nauseated from the thought. "Oh wow…that's...that's really terrible. I'd have just had to be an asshole that night."

"On the plus side... at least she didn't want me to deal with the backdoor." Die actually did make a gagging noise at that and then shuddered. "Okay, new subject!"

Kyo huffed and shook his head before burying it against Die's shoulder. He inhaled his lover's clean scent just to get his mind off such unpleasant things. "Yes, please..."

"Um... so in recent history... meaning since you've been with me... what's the strangest porn you've watched?" He shifted slightly, reaching up to lightly stroke Kyo's basically nonexistent hair

The vocalist was quiet for a minute, having to actually think about the porn he'd watched. "Hmm, the only thing that's coming to mind is a whole lot of golden shower type stuff." He bit his lip, thinking some more. "Oh, no, I was wrong. I did resort to pretty kinky pet-play stuff like last year."

"You actually... went and watched that kind of stuff? Was it... for me?" Die questioned quietly, his fingers lightly playing with Kyo's shirt.

Kyo licked his lips, moving his hand to stroke it up and down Die's back. "Mmhmm. I'd watched it before, of course...but I wanted a more in depth look at what turned you on. I actually found what sites you visited the most and went to those."

Die choked a little bit at that and then huffed out a laugh. "Shit... back before I learned to clear my cache... whoops."

Kyo chuckled and turned his head, pressing his lips against Die's skin, his hand settling on his lower back. "Yes, well, I know it was rude to be nosy but..." He offered a shrug and laughed again.

"Mmm... well... future reference... all my porn bookmarks are under the folder called recipes." He coughed softly and then shook his head. "I wanted to look at yours, but... I imagined you probably knew how to lock things up tighter than me, so..."

Kyo snickered and nodded his head. "Yeah, I have things locked up but, if you ever get in the mood to see what gets me off, just go look in the mirror."

Die pulled back from the other, absolutely beaming down at Kyo as he sat there. "Okay... night officially made." He leaned in and gave Kyo a quick peck on the lips and then pulled himself off his lap, plunking back down beside him - though right against him - and grabbed the rest of the spring roll.

Kyo gave Die a smirk, his arm slipping around his lover's shoulders. "Good." He leaned over and caught the spring roll with his teeth just as Die got it to his mouth. He bit off a small portion then leaned back to chew it, grinning.

"Hey!" Die stuck his tongue out and then stuffed the rest into his mouth, looking irrationally dumb with a large quantity of food stuffing his cheeks.

Kyo swallowed his bite then burst out laughing at Die. "You look like a demented squirrel."

Die sputtered out something around it and then continued to diligently chew at the huge wad of spring roll, starting to regret his decision.

Kyo snickered and grabbed up his tea, leaning back to sip at it as he watched Die. "That's what you get for being greedy," he said with a grin.

Eventually, Die got the food all chewed and swallowed and then chuckled. "I should not go that route again."

Kyo reached over to pat Die's back, chuckling. "Probably not. You're lucky you didn't choke."

"Please... I've had bigger things in my mouth than that," Die gave Kyo's crotch a significant look before smirking.

Kyo followed Die's gaze then licked his lips, smirking. "Indeed you have..." He almost made some comment about even bigger things elsewhere, but kept it to himself for the time being.

Die chucked a bit and then sat back, stretching slightly. "Okay... that was all less horrible than I was anticipating. Somehow... I guess I just thought it'd all be me, and you'd have like one ridiculous little thing, and I'd still be pouring my fucked up shit out three hours later."

Kyo gave Die an incredulous look. "Daisuke, I cut myself on stage for years. Hell, I've even vomited up there a few times. Who do you think you're talking to here?"

"We both know the face we give the public isn't the full thing... and sometimes not the real one either." Die shrugged. "That aside, I always fear I'm too much more fucked in the head and one day..." he pursed his lips, not wanting to say it. "I fear these things, because it's in my nature to do it... not because I think it'd actually happen that way, you know?"

Kyo sighed softly and nodded, reaching over to take Die's hand. "I know, darling...but look at it this way...I've already agreed to marry your ass. You've got me hook, line, and sinker…so it doesn't matter."

Die grinned at him and then leaned over just to nuzzle his nose against Kyo's for a moment. "Mmm... all mine. This cute ass will never be available to someone else without my say so... and yours, but... you get my point."

Kyo laughed, tilting his head a bit to catch Die's lips, kissing him slowly for a few moments before pulling back. "Yeah, I get your point," he murmured with a smirk.

Die sort of burrowed himself against the other man with a bit of a yawn. "So... what things do you think Die likes best from the porn then?"

Kyo brought his hand up to cup the back of Die's neck, massaging lightly. The redhead chuckled a bit, leaning into the massage, his eyelids a half-mast, pleasure of a different sort cascading through him at the actions. "Mmm... feels so good," he murmured about the massage, his hand fluttering to lightly touch Kyo's arm to tell him what he was talking about without saying it. 

"Hmm, I think Die likes it the best when the guys jack off afterward...and I think he likes it when it's particularly desperate....am I right?"

At the deduction, Die let out a laugh. "Yeah... I like it a lot when they get off on what they just did. Makes it a million times better. When it's followed by a cumshot... fuck yeah." He nuzzled his nose up under Kyo's jawline again and huffed out a soft breath. "And it depends on the day for desperation... but yes."

Kyo hummed softly, a smirk playing on his lips. He shifted his hand a bit to really knead the muscles of Die's neck, knowing that those in particular got a lot of strain.

"Mm, I did notice that you tended to have more views on certain ones. Like the one where the guy pisses and then jizzes all over the mirror."

Die squirmed slightly in Kyo's lap and then settled again with a sound of bliss as Kyo massaged him even harder. "Yeah... there's certain ones that just do it for me faster, and I use them for a quick fix, especially when one of us is sick, or we're too tired... stuff like that."

The vocalist nodded then shifted around a bit, bringing his other hand up to join in on the massaging. "Yeah, I think we all have ones like that in reserve."

"Those ones that just make you so fucking horny so fast that it's pointless to watch them if you're trying to prolong it." He chuckled and then shifted his hips, pressing himself closer to Kyo, enjoying the massage while talking about this sort of thing. "What's yours?"

Kyo grunted in response, his hands dipping underneath the collar of Die's shirt to get at more skin. He turned his head to nuzzle against Die's hair, chuckling. "There's one where this guy is being choked as he's fucked from behind, and he cums without even touching his dick. He just explodes all over the damn place."

Die shivered a little and then slid his tongue out, teasing at Kyo's neck just a little bit. He, for once, wasn't aiming to ramp things up quickly. In fact, he wouldn't be disappointed if things never went beyond this. But he was sincerely loving the massage and fully enjoying playing with Kyo like this. "You'd like that... wouldn't you?" he murmured. "To be the one being choked."

Kyo tilted his head a bit, inviting more of the licking. Die wasn't the only one greatly enjoying the way things were right then. He shifted gears a bit and pulled his hands free only to slide them down and back up Die's shirt the other way, gaining further access to his back. He trailed a fingertip down Die's spine, smiling to himself when he could barely feel it. "Mm, yeah, I would. Something about it sets me off a good bit."

"Maybe," Die nipped lightly, "when we're not having any interviews or anything you need to sing for, hmm?" Though, he was admittedly afraid he'd be the cause of horrible things for the other in a permanent sort of way.

Kyo let out a soft sound of pleasure at the nip. "Mm, there's a way to do it without completely fucking my throat up." He slid one hand free and grasped Die's, bringing it up to his neck. Placing it against his jugular and away from his vocal chords, he tapped lightly. "Here will give the same effect...but without risking it as much."

Die let out a soft hum against Kyo's neck when the other took his hand and showed him where to push. "I tried it once, but I don't think I did it right..." he licked just behind Kyo's ear and then settled, his head resting on his shoulder.

Kyo nodded, pulling Die's hand away and kissing the back of it. "I've looked into it some more since the surgery and such. I think it's just a matter of getting the right placement and pressure." He kissed Die's hand again then held it against his chest, closing his eyes. He was quiet for several moments before he turned and nuzzled his nose into Die's hair. "Mm, love you."

"I love you, too, baby," Die returned, just resting against Kyo's shoulder, his eyelids mostly closed, a soft smile on his face. Even after all the shit of the day, at least... they'd come to here. This was a comfortable place, all the shit in the dust behind them, only pleasantness in front of them now.


	61. Chapter 61

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Between the business of getting home from the tour and settled back into something resembling a routine, Kyo had found that he'd been unable to plan anything super special for Die's birthday. If he was honest with himself, he didn't actually want to deal with a party anyway. Instead, he'd opted for something extremely simple that involved just the two of them, at home with no interruptions.  
The morning of, he awoke before Die and slipped out of bed without waking his lover. With some trial and error, he managed to make french toast with strawberries and peaches on top as well as scrambled eggs, bacon and coffee. He went the sappy route and arranged it all on a tray with "Happy Birthday Die" written in chocolate drizzle over the top piece of french toast.  
He tied a small, heart-shaped balloon he'd had filled with helium to the handle. Then, adding a single long-stemmed rose and a square, black velvet Chrome Hearts box to the tray, he cautiously carried everything upstairs.  
After very nearly losing it all when Snowball darted between his legs, he made it to the bedroom, pausing by the bed and smiling down at his sleeping lover. "Dai~suke," he called out, bumping the bed with his hip. "Wakey wakey, Die."

Die hadn't stirred at all in the entire time Kyo had been gone, out like a light. He'd stayed up well past Kyo the night before, drinking probably a few beers more than he should have before he was completely done and had crawled in bed.  
When Kyo bumped the bed, he grunted, but didn't open his eyes. But then his lover's voice rang out again and Die huffed out a breath, sucking it right back in with a yawn as he rolled over. "Mmm?" he questioned, his eyes still not open.

Kyo shifted on his feet, watching Die roll over but not open his eyes. He snorted lightly and nudged the bed again. "Sit up, baby. This is kinda heavy."

Die finally cracked an eye open when Kyo told him something was heavy. Slowly the sludge that was his brain registered it was his birthday, and he immediately started pushing the covers back, completely disregarding his slight morning wood and the fact that it was on display, just moving until he was comfortable and then settling back against the headboard with a mumbled, "S'my breakfast?"

Kyo pursed his lips, looking ever so slightly annoyed as he realized that Die must've stayed up drinking after he'd gone to bed. Biting it back though, he leaned over and settled the tray over Die's legs, keeping it away from his morning issues. "Yes...well, it's our breakfast."

Die blinked a few times and then wiped his hand over his eyes, yawning a bit and then settling again. "Mmm... it smells amazing." He picked up the flower and pretty much jammed it in his nose, sniffing it and then grinning, putting it back in the vase and transferring it to the nightstand. "You're sweet."

Kyo offered a smile at that, finally crawling onto the bed to sit next to Die. "Happy Birthday, gorgeous."  
"Thank you, love," Die returned, reaching for one of the peach slices, just popping it into his mouth and then sitting there chewing, still looking very bleary-eyed.

Kyo looked up at Die , waiting expectantly for reactions to what he considered was immense effort he'd put into this meal. When it became obvious that Die was not fully with himself yet though, Kyo bit back a sigh and just went about taking his portion of the food. He shifted over and grabbed his fork, the other one on the side where Die's gift was sitting. He cut off a piece of the french toast and took a bite, chewing slowly.

It took Die a few minutes before he was finally within his own mental faculties again. By then, he had eaten a good portion of the fruit off the top of the french toast. He picked up his fork and dug into the eggs first, popping them in his mouth and then looking slightly surprised. "What'd you do different? These are amazing."

Kyo looked up from his coffee cup, peering at Die over the rim for a moment before shrugging. "I couldn't find the salt so I added a bit of soy sauce instead."

"Mmm... I really like it," he murmured before stabbing another bit and pushing it into his mouth.

Kyo smiled a bit, going back to his own food. He picked up a piece of bacon and bit off it, then took in a mouthful of eggs as well. "Mm, good. They do taste pretty awesome. I'm just happy I didn't undercook them."

Die shrugged. "Eggs are okay as long as you cook them at all. I forget what Americans call it, but there's one that has runny bits still in it... not just the yolk." He cut off a bite of the french toast and popped it into his mouth as well, humming softly and then smiling.

Kyo shrugged. "I know what you're talking about but I don't know the name." He shifted around and got closer to Die before he reached to pick up his second piece of toast. He dipped it in the remaining syrup and chocolate drizzle on his plate and took a bite, licking his lips right after.

It took Die a while, but he made his way through the meal, eating most of it without many pauses in between. After a bit though, he gently moved the tray. "I need to pee, or I'm gonna fuckin' piss the bed." With that, he was up and heading quickly to the bathroom, the quickness of his steps making it apparent at how urgent it really was.

Kyo had long finished off his food before Die, having given the redhead a larger portion. He looked at the other then rescued the tray, noting that the balloon had come undone and was now bobbing along the ceiling. Puffing out a breath, he took the last sip of his coffee and settled the cup on the tray, waiting for Die to come back.

A few minutes later, Die came back, looking much relieved and smelling a bit of mint. He plopped back down and then scooted in close to Kyo, leaning over to kiss his cheek. "Thank you for breakfast. Sorry about that... I tried to hold it but... yeah."

Kyo smiled slightly at the kiss on his cheek then shook his head. "It's okay. I totally understand..." He shifted the tray over. "Set it on the floor if you're done, or else there'll be syrup everywhere."

Die picked up the tray and shifted off the bed, knelt down and put it down on the floor. He picked up the box and put it on the bed, shooing the remaining cat out and closing the door. "No cats in the syrup either. Messy, messy." He came back, picked up the gift, and settled on the bed once again, quietly opening the box.

Kyo watched as Die put the tray down, almost sighing in relief when he came back up with the box. Part of him had been seriously worried the other hadn't even seen it, and he was going to be more than a bit upset if so.  
Gesturing to it, he shrugged a bit. "I know you have a ton of bracelets but I loved the design of this one and knew you didn't already have it."

The instant he opened the box, Die's eyes lit up. It was true, he did have a ton of bracelets, but that never stopped him from buying more or from wearing more if he was gifted some. He gathered it out of the box and immediately put it on, holding out his arm to admire it. "It's gorgeous." He turned a full-on smile on the other and then leaned over, framing his face with his hands and kissing him soundly on the lips.

Kyo's face held some amount of relief on it as Die seemed to genuinely be happy with his gift. He couldn't help but smiling at Die's happiness, leaning into the kiss and returning it enthusiastically. "I'm really glad you like it."

Die beamed at him and then nodded. "Of course I do... since when have I not liked something you've gotten me? You've always known me really well."

Kyo shrugged a bit, giving Die a bit of a sheepish smile. "I still worry, though."   
"You shouldn't," Die returned quietly in return to Kyo's expressed worry. "You're just fine."  
Kyo leaned in and kissed his lover again, this one holding a little heat to it. "So, now that you've had your breakfast...would you like dessert?"

Die reached out and grasped his lover's hips, tugging him in an attempt to get him onto his lap. "C'mere."

Kyo shifted into Die's lap, straddling him and leaning in to nuzzle his neck, nipping the skin lightly. "I can't help it." He slid his hands over Die's chest, stroking lightly.

"I know," the redhead returned quietly, tilting his head a bit and then smirking. "Mmm... as much as I want to make like a rabid bunny and hump your brains out... I think I'd rather just make you do all the work today, hmm?" He smirked a bit.

Kyo chuckled and scraped his teeth over Die's Adam's Apple. "Believe it or not, that was the plan, since it is your birthday." He shifted around a bit then pushed his hips forward, starting to slowly rock them against Die's, his arousal becoming obvious. "If I hadn't just gone to all the trouble to fix breakfast, I'd have jumped on your morning wood for a ride."

Die huffed out a soft laugh, reaching up to rub his hand over Kyo's slightly longer hair. "Mmm... it would have held up, though I'm not sure I could have cum like that."

Kyo laughed lowly, lifting his head and grin at Die. "That's alright. I could have." He smirked then leaned in to kiss his lover deeply, pushing his tongue between his lips.

Die started to respond, but he was rather insistently assaulted by Kyo's tongue in his mouth, and he found he couldn't complain about that.  
Kyo took his sweet time plundering Die's mouth, sliding his tongue against the guitarist's. He rocked his hips forward as he did, building up the passion between them. The other shifted slightly, pushing his hips forward to meet Kyo's own, a soft purr of pleasure rumbling through him. Kyo finally pulled back from the kiss, nipping and sucking on Die's bottom lip. He smirked at his lover, dipping his head down to lock his mouth around Die's Adam's apple, sucking the area harshly before swiping his tongue over it.  
Die let out a loud moan when the other sucked on him there. Grabbing the back of his head, he pushed him down against it with a grunt, desperately wanting more of that.

A chuckle left Kyo's lips as Die pushed against his head. He shifted a bit then scraped his teeth over the protrusion, following with another swipe of the tongue. Pressing his lips to the slowly reddening skin, he jerked his hips forward, showing Die that he was getting rather riled up over all of this.

Die hissed out a breath and then shuddered slightly. "God yes," he muttered out. "Just... keep doing that."

Kyo raised an eyebrow, having had a few other things in mind but nonetheless, he did as Die asked, focusing on nipping, sucking and licking at his Adam's apple. He kept his hand busy, sliding it over Die's side and up to his nipples, tweaking one as he squirmed in his lap.

It took a few minutes before Die was already gasping, squirming under him. "Hnngg... fuck, Kyo!" he hissed softly.

Kyo finally lifted his head again, licking his lips. "Later...," he quipped, giving Die a dirty smirk before shifting down a bit. He paid attention to Die's nipples, giving each of them a good once over with his tongue before kissing and biting his way down. He dipped his tongue into Die's belly button before following his non-existent happy trail to the edge of his pants, finally darting his eyes up to his lover's face.  
The redhead just allowed it all to happen, his head falling back against the wall, his eyelids fluttering shut. This... was amazing, and he wasn't about to let it go.

Kyo repositioned himself then began to mouth at Die's cock through his sleep pants. He focused mainly on the head, getting the fabric good and wet around it.

Die's hips jerked a bit when Kyo began to mouth over his cock in his pants. He shivered and then moaned, a pleasant little sound as he reached down to stroke over Kyo's hair, just rubbing his hand back and forth over what was left of it, a little smirk on his face.

Kyo worked at Die's cock that way for a few moments more before growing impatient. He leaned up and tugged the guitarist's pants down just enough to free his length. Groaning softly, he grasped the base with long fingers, holding him still as he ran his tongue up the underside of it then over the head. After repeating these actions a couple of times, he finally took Die between his lips, slowly working his way down.

"May the gods bless you and your mouth," Die breathed out, fingers lightly raking at Die's hair as the other went down on him. It all felt so amazing, and he was more pleased than he had any right to be with the fact that the other was doing this to him right then.

Kyo couldn't help but smirk around Die's cock at the other's words. Pulling up, he locked eyes with Die as he snaked his tongue out, lewdly lapping it over the head of his cock like a lollipop. He wrapped his lips around it once more, giving a good slurping sound before he actually began bobbing his head up and down. It took him a few moments but he was finally taking all of Die in, groaning as his lover's cock slid down his throat partway.

Die watched his lover work in amazement, sort of gaping down at him as he moved over his dick. It felt so good, and he just couldn't even begin to figure out what Kyo would do next. But once the vocalist had his dick down his throat, he cried out Kyo's name a bit loudly, whimpering just after.

Kyo moaned around Die as he worked his dick. He bobbed his head diligently, his hands coming to rest on his lover's hips to keep him from thrusting too much. Swallowing around him, Kyo glanced up at Die, lust in his eyes. He was achingly hard already just from sucking Die's cock.

Die squirmed a bit and then shivered slightly, pursing his lips as he huffed out a soft sound. And then, immediately after, "Fuck, baby if you don't... uggh!"

Kyo groaned, bobbing his head a few more times before finally pulling up. "As much as I'd love to have you cum down my throat...I have other plans." He shifted up onto his knees, pushing his pants down then squirming around to get them off, leaving himself completely naked.  
He straddled Die's lap again, reaching back to grasp his cock, steadying as he slowly sank down on him, revealing that he was pre-prepped and lubed. He shuddered as he got about halfway then stopped, gazing at Die. "Unless you'd rather something else..."

Die was, admittedly, in a complete state of shock over what Kyo was currently doing to him. Particularly when the other slid down on his dick, already lubed up and ready for him. "No... no." He slid his arms around Kyo to hold him in place. "No other things. This is... is good."

Kyo huffed out a laugh then let himself drop the rest of the way down. "A-ah fuck!" He settled there for a second then started gyrating his hips, basically grinding against Die for the moment.

The guitarist didn't waste any time either, thrusting up into the other just the smallest amount as Kyo humped against him. "Fuck, baby..."

Kyo leaned forward, basically lying against Die's chest. He lifted his hips and pushed them back down, just barely moving off of Die's cock but moaning anyway as it brushed over his prostate.

Die grunted softly and then breathed out a quiet laugh, pushing his face against Kyo's neck. "Happy fucking birthday to me."

Kyo rumbled out a laugh, lifting his head to catch Die in a quick kiss. "Happy birthday, indeed." He grinned then finally righted himself, smirking down at Die. He drew his feet up until he was basically squatting over his lover then proceeded to start bouncing on his cock, letting out a rather loud cry. "Oh fuck!!"  
The instant that Kyo moved around and then actually started to bounce on his dick, Die started to cry out rather frantically, his eyes wide and pleasure written all over his face.

Kyo moaned and reached out, grabbing Die's hands and holding onto them for support as he bounced. He slowed his pace a bit in favor of pulling almost all the way off of Die's dick to slam back down on it, impaling himself again and again with breathless moans.

Die just let Kyo work after a few moments, enjoying the way he moved. He let the other hold onto his hands, helping him keep a good grip while he moved.

Finally, Kyo stopped his bouncing, returning to moving his hips in slow circles before stopping completely. Smirking, he carefully slid off of Die's cock, shifting over onto the bed, positioning himself on his hands and knees. "C'mere Die and fuck me into the bed."

The redhead let out a sound of protest the instant that Kyo slid up off of him, his lips clearly about to form a more coherent issue with what had just happened. But then Kyo was asking him to fuck him... from behind no less. Die wasted no time at all, pushing himself up and positioning himself behind the vocalist. In an instant, he had him impaled on his dick, his hips moving quickly as he bent over his back, basically leaning on him while humping his ass.

Kyo let out a porn star worthy cry as Die pushed into him, the angle definitely hitting all the right spots for him. He reached back and pushed his hand into Die's red locks, tugging a bit harshly. "Oh fuck yes!"

Die just kept up what he was doing, not at all hindered by the hand in his hair... or anything else for that matter. No... this was his time, and he was definitely taking it in every way he possibly could. His hips moved quickly, his breathing equally as sharp as he went after Kyo.

Kyo loved every moment of the way Die was going after him, his cock aching and weeping between his legs. He found Die's rhythm then matched it, rolling his hips back at just the right time.

Somewhere in the midst of it, Die simply lost all ability for patience. His thrusts grew harder, his breathing more rapid, and after a few more bucks of his hips, he was cumming, a loud cry issuing from him as he came.

As Die came unraveled, Kyo shifted enough to slide his hand between his legs, jerking his cock. He let out a moan as he felt Die filling him, a shudder of pleasure going through him. He clenched around him, milking him as he worked for his own end, his breath coming in heavy pants.

For a few moments, Die did nothing, utterly in shock over his own orgasm. But the instant he came back around to reality, he pushed Kyo's hand away, replacing it with his own, starting to jack him off quickly. "C'mon baby... join me."

Kyo groaned the instant Die's hand came around his cock. It didn't take but another few seconds before he was letting out a cry of his own, spurting his offering onto the bed beneath.

Die groaned, his hips pushing forward a few more times as the other came around him. His hips rocked and he let out a quiet sigh of relief. "It feels so perfect when you cum."

The vocalist sagged a bit after he'd cum, huffing out of a soft moan. "Mmm, if it feels anything like you, then yeah...I know that perfection."

The guitarist just snuggled up against Kyo's backside, a smirk on his lips as he remained there. Yes... this was... perfect. Oh so perfect.

Kyo grinned, reaching back to push his fingers into Die's hair again, his touch gentle this time. "After we've recovered...I have another surprise for you...but it can wait for now."

Die only remained there for a few minutes, finally pulling out and sort of falling to the side. He chuckled softly and then murmured, "Another surprise? Really?"

Kyo grunted when Die pulled out, shifting around then collapsing himself, careful to avoid his own mess. "Mmhmm. Really."

Die yawned and then rolled onto his side, flopping one leg over Kyo's. "Mmm... all the surprises today!"

Kyo laughed softly, reaching out to place his hand on Die's chest. "Yep. That's what you get for your birthday....surprises."

Die huffed out a soft laugh. "Sounds great to me." He snuggled in a bit more. "After another nap?"

Kyo yawned and nodded, pushing his face against Die's neck. "Yes, nap sounds good..."

"Good..." Die yawned loudly once more and then snuggled down, pulling one of the covers over them to keep them warmer while they rested.

Kyo shifted around then settled, a small smile on his face. He dozed off eventually, feeling pretty good about how things were going so far.

It took Die a few hours before he started to wake up, rolling over and smacking his lips as he stared at the clock. He squinted a bit at the numbers and then huffed out a sigh. He really did need glasses again it seemed.  
Die pushed himself up and quietly padded off to the bathroom, staring in the mirror for a moment and then making a face, pushing himself back and padding over to turn on the shower, letting it warm up.

Kyo let out a near whine when Die rolled out of bed, robbing him of his pillow and warmth. He lay there for several long moments until he heard the shower running, his bladder instantly responding to it.  
Grunting, he rolled out of bed and shuffled into the bathroom, coming up behind Die and wrapping his arms around his middle. "Gotta piss," he mumbled, face smooshed against Die's shoulder blade.

When Kyo came up behind him, he leaned toward him and then murmured, "Mmm, hello to you, too," a big smile on his face as he turned around and lightly goosed the other.

Kyo huffed out something akin to a squeak before smirking and leaning in to press his face against Die's neck. "Mm, hi there, sexy."

Die nuzzled his face against Kyo's still mostly shaved head and then muttered, "I know it's your head, but a little longer is preferable... no handles anymore." He chuckled.

Kyo chuckled, nipping at Die's skin a bit then pulling back. He ran his hand over the top of his head and shrugged. "It's growing...just slowly."  
He gave a little yawn then moved to pad over to the shower, giving Die a dirty look. "You gonna come watch me piss or not?"

Die stared at Kyo for all of half a second and then headed right after him, looking perhaps a bit more thrilled than he should have been.

Kyo grinned widely, stepping into the shower and leaning against the wall. He reached down to give his cock a couple of strokes, sighing with the pleasure of it.  
Finally, he held still and pushed out the first spurt, groaning lowly as it spattered on the wall and trickled down.

Die stepped into the shower stall as well and then turned off the water. He bit his lip a little and then stepped in front of Kyo, reaching to run his hands over the other's stomach. "Mmm..."

Kyo, with some difficulty, stopped pissing and looked at Die, smirking. "Any requests, love?"

Stepping right up to his lover, he pressed himself against him, trapping his dick between them, and braced his hands on the wall on either side of Kyo. "Just keep pissing, baby."

Kyo groaned and nodded, moving his hand. He settled both on Die's hips and then just started pissing, letting it go freely. "Hnng..."

Die shivered slightly, his eyelids falling closed as Kyo relieved himself all over him, the flow cascading down his legs and over his own stiffening cock. "Just like that," Die breathed out softly.

Kyo finally finished up, not having had a completely full bladder. He stood there though, drawing Die closer and rocking his hips forward, his cock slowly hardening against Die's.

By the time Kyo was done, Die was nearly panting from how horny he was from what the other did. He crushed his mouth against Kyo's own, shifting his hips forward, pushing a bit, piss starting to leak from the tip of his cock.

Kyo groaned into the kiss, shoving his mouth into Die's, his hands sliding around to grasp at his ass. He pulled him closer, nearly rutting against him, smirking against his lips as he felt the warmth of the piss.

"Oh god," Die breathed out against Kyo's lips, pushing harder until he finally started a good stream, it spurting up between them, the sound of it hitting the floor actually rather loud.

Kyo leaned back enough to grin at Die before slipping one hand back around between them. He ran his finger over the head of Die's cock, playing in the piss as it came out, occasionally pressing against the hole slightly.

Die groaned, shivering and then leaned down to attack the other's neck, licking at him and then nipping as he continued using Kyo as his newfangled toilet.

Kyo gave Die's ass a good squeeze then brought his other hand up to tangle into his lover's hair, yanking it a bit just for the hell of it. He shifted and pushed his erection against Die's cock, looping his fingers around both of them and holding them there. "Hnn, having fun using me, baby?"

Die grunted softly and then nodded. "Yes, I am," he whispered against his neck, nipping and then licking in apology for the nip. Another kiss, and then he rubbed his nose against the other's jawline.

Kyo stroked his fingers through Die's hair then along his neck, tilting his head to the side. "Good..."

A fast gush of piss left Die's body as he gave it a good push and then finished himself out, panting softly from the effort it had taken to get his hard cock to let it all go.

Kyo let out a low moan as Die finished up pissing. He released his lover and leaned back a little, smirking. "You're hard as rock. I'm surprised you were able to get it out..."

Die grunted and then murmured, "It's sort of... difficult, but you learn how eventually." He nipped once against at Kyo, feeling rather bitey for the day. "God, I want you so fucking bad right now... covered in my piss and yours... fuck!"

Kyo hummed in response then groaned at the bite. He licked his lips, giving Die a sultry look. "Then take me, birthday boy. It's all yours today."

Die pulled back and murmured, "Turn around."

Kyo smirked and did just that, turning around and bracing himself against the shower wall. He spread his legs a bit then looked back at Die over his shoulder.

The redhead shifted behind Kyo, pressing his cock between Kyo's cheeks and slowly starting to lean into it, seeing if he could manage this just with the dampness from his piss or not.

Kyo bit his lip as Die started to push in, forcing his body to relax, loving the way it burned a little.

"Are we okay?" Die breathed out, hoping he was going to be okay and not have to leave the bathroom, but he wasn't entirely sure.

Kyo grunted and nodded his head. "Yeah, keep going...we're fine."

Die pushed most of the way in before reaching to turn the shower back on, figuring that it would probably make things a bit easier. He started to move, his eyelids hooding slightly.

Kyo shifted and rocked his hips back, moaning. "Oh God...Die..."

The warm water from the shower felt nice cascading over him as he took Kyo from behind, looking down at that lovely ass as he pushed himself between the globes. "You've got the best ass, just... so you know."

Kyo huffed out a laugh, rolling his hips, making his ass move. "Mm, so I've been told..." He reached back to find one of Die's hands, dragging it around in front of him. He kissed his fingers, drawing one between his lips, suckling it for a moment then releasing it.

Die let Kyo do whatever he wanted with his hand, smirking as he kept moving, watching himself for a few moments and then groaning, closing his eyes.

Kyo loved everything about what was going on right then. The warm water and steam wafting around them as Die took him were relaxing enough that he didn't even feel the need to ramp it up. Die, on the other hand, was definitely worked up. He kept thrusting quickly, his arousal rather boiled up instead of just on simmer.

The vocalist moaned as Die pushed into him at such a pace, his cock hard between his legs. He shifted his stance a bit, bending at the waist a bit more then crying out lowly when Die's length hit just the right spot.

"Oh yeah, baby, you like that?" Die hissed out, his pace picking up when he heard Kyo cry out, something about it setting him off even more than he already was.

Kyo clawed at the shower wall, a shudder rippling through him as Die's thrusts quickened. "O-oh yes! Fuck me harder, Die!"

"Your wish," Die ramped up his pace along with the hardness of his thrusts, gasping for breath as he went, "Is my command."

Kyo let out a keening cry of pleasure as Die slammed into him. He ended up leaning into the wall, pushing his hips back to meet Die's. "Oh..fuck...I'm cumming!," he cried out, doing just that, his cock starting to spurt onto the wall in front of him. "Yes!!"

Die was honestly somewhat amazed as Kyo started to cum so easily. He grinned happily as he continued to pound into him for a few moments, finally groaning and settling deep inside him, pulsing out his own release.

Kyo shuddered as he felt Die cumming inside him, loving every moment of it. "Die..."

Pulling out, Die knelt down behind Kyo, spreading his cheeks and watching as his own cum slid back out of his body, shivering as he watched it.

Kyo turned his head, seeing what Die was doing then grinning. He pushed the cum out, moaning softly as it slid down the back of his thighs.

Die kneading Kyo's ass and then pushed himself up kissing lightly at Kyo's lower back before he moved to under the showerhead.

Kyo hummed, slumping against the wall for the time being, a satisfied grin on his face. "Gods, baby...

Die began rinsing off quickly, a smirk on his face. "Sex twice before three in the afternoon..." he murmured. "I couldn't be luckier."

Kyo laughed then finally moved, turning around to interrupt Die's rinsing with a kiss. "Mm, indeed..." He released Die, leaning against the wall once more, waiting his turn to rinse off.

Die tugged Kyo against himself and started to scrub him down real fast, nuzzling into Kyo's neck and just breathing in his scent.

Kyo sighed, a grin on his face. "Hey, I'm supposed to be pampering you, today."

"Shhh, this is what I want to do," Die returned, nuzzling over the other as he continued to wash him. A few more minutes and he finished up with both of them, turning off the shower.

Kyo huffed and reached up to pet Die's hair as he nuzzled him. "If you insist then." Once they were all finished up, he stepped out and grabbed a towel, patting himself off quickly before holding out another one for Die. "So....for dinner...I was thinking of the Tea Garden...."

Die grinned at him and then stuck out his tongue at Kyo, knowing it was childish and feeling pleased with himself. He toweled off as well and then shot Kyo a shocked look. "You... you got us in there?"

Kyo smirked, popping Die with the towel lightly before tossing them both in the hamper. He turned back around and grinned, looking rather proud of himself. "Yeah, I did...we have reservations for 6."

"Holy crap," Die returned, murmuring softly, "Dude, you are seriously amazing, I'm just sayin'." With that, he wet upon himself in the mirror, starting to dry his hair.

Kyo couldn't help feeling rather happy about Die's reaction, his lips quirked up in little smile as he went about getting his teeth brushed. His hair was too short to do anything with, so he let it be and wandered out towards the bedroom, patting Die's ass on his way.

Everything Die did, he did much the way he would have prepared for a concert; styling his hair and then adding a small amount of eyeliner, moisturizer to his cheeks, and then slipping into the bedroom, still naked.

Kyo was lounging on the bed, dressed only in a pair of red and black boxers. "It's still early. I didn't see a rush in getting ready just yet," he said by way of explanation for his current state.

Die surveyed him and then snorted softly. "You're... sexy as fuck when half-dressed so, I have no objections." He stepped into the walk-in and began rummaging. "Suit?"

Kyo shifted back on the bed, pillowing his head on his hand. "Mmm, too stuffy. Slacks and dress shirt, no tie."

"Hnn," Die went on digging, finally pulling out a pair of pinstripe grey and silver suit pants and a silk silver button-up shirt. He brought them out and held them up. "Yes, no, maybe?"

Kyo stretched and lolled on the bed while Die was digging in the closet. When his lover spoke up again, he sat back up, surveying the out. "Mmm, yes. I approve."

"Kyo approved, Die... wearing." He made a face. "That sounded better in my head." With that, he placed the outfit on the bed and went to get some underwear on, then pick out jewelry.

Kyo laughed and flopped back, yawning a bit. He'd gotten up a good bit earlier than Die to make his birthday breakfast. He debated on it for a minute then huffed, reaching out to draw a corner of the covers over himself. "Hey babe, wake me up in 30 minutes? I seriously can't keep my eyes open."

"Of course," Die returned, putting out what he wanted to wear jewelry-wise and then setting his alarm on his phone, putting it down and rolling onto the bed, making sure he was on his stomach and his head resting on Kyo a bit so he wasn't going to end up messing up his hair too badly before closing his eyes as well.

Kyo smiled and shifted closer to Die, his hand coming out to rest on his lover's back. He let out a soft sigh, already drifting off for his nap.


	62. Chapter 62

With a final wave, Kyo stepped off of the stage, heading towards the back with a satisfied feeling. His solo project's debut had been quite well received judging by the roar of the crowd. He was actually smiling as he arrived at the designated room that the other members were gathered in, and he offered them all a deep bow before going to collapse in an available chair.

He accepted a towel and wiped off his face before looking around, frowning when he didn't immediately notice a certain redhead among the people in the room. "Has anyone seen Die?" he questioned, receiving a few head shakes in response. He huffed out a sigh and pulled out his phone, shooting off a text, feeling the slightest bit put out now. 

Where are you?

Die had been in the pit with the rest of the crowd during Kyo's show, and he had been more than a bit alarmed by the power of the people that had been around him. The instant Kyo had appeared on stage everyone had crushed forward, Die being swept up in it, unable to remotely fight it. It'd been years since he'd been directly in the midst of a pit like that, and honestly he had mildly panicked.

Once the show was over, it took a while for the crowd to relax enough for Die to push his way out. He was sweaty, trembling, and wide-eyed. Honestly, he felt like he had when he'd tried one of the tiny brown pills someone had offered him once years and years ago. He finally got to the backstage door and tried to get in, but the security guy was apparently an idiot and had no fucking idea who the hell he was and kept blocking his way, even with Die tried to get argumentative with him about it.

Finally, he pulled out his phone, only to find it was smashed, the screen cracked to shit and back and even though the could turn on the screen, he couldn't make it do a damn other thing because of how cracked the screen was. Dejected and somewhat upset, he leaned against the wall and glared at the guard, refusing to leave when he was told to get out of there.

Kyo sat for a few minutes, awaiting Die's answer. When none was forthcoming, he began to get upset. Die had pretty much insisted on coming, and Kyo had gladly set him up with tickets. They'd agreed to meet backstage after Sukekiyo's set and Kyo had been eager to see his lover's reaction. 

Frowning, he stood up, pacing back and forth a bit before growling and wandering out of the room, not wanting everyone in there to ask questions. He tried calling Die's phone and let it ring until he got voicemail. He hung up without leaving a message and stood there, trying to figure out what he could do to get in contact with his wayward lover.

Sugizo's set started, and he glanced towards the stage area. Deciding that maybe Die wanted to see part of it, he made his way towards the stage, expecting to see Die there watching. What he found was a very surly looking redhead, glaring at the security guard. He frowned and walked up to them both, his arms crossed. "Oi, what the fuck's going on?"

Die pushed himself away from the wall the instant that he saw Kyo, something like desperation plastering itself across his features. He gestured angrily at the security guard. "This asshole won't let me back to see you." He nearly spit the words out at the guard. "Doesn't seem to know who I am and is refusing to check any fucking lists!"

The guard just stood his ground, defiantly staring at Die. "No one backstage, Boss' orders." He didn't seem to see or care about Kyo's presence, still holding his place between the pair of them.

Kyo stared between Die and the guard, his expression turned dark. "Are you fucking stupid? Not only is he allowed backstage...he was INVITED," he practically screamed. "Now check your damn list and quit being a lazy fucktard."

Die seemed to sort of calm down as Kyo got more and more angry. He looked nearly amused by the time the guard looked ready to shit himself at Kyo's yelling at him. Finally, the man looked at Kyo's pass, the fact that it said artist and then just moved for Die to go back. 

And he certainly did. He stepped around the man and muttered out, "Asshole... had to go and make him mad after such an amazing show? Really?" He glowered and then shook his head, opening the back door and holding it for Kyo, slipping in behind him.

Kyo shot the guard another nasty look before stalking through the held door, everything about his stance radiating anger and annoyance. Once he was behind that door, however, he had only one thing on his mind and that was the redhead standing before him. 

"Well?" he questioned softly, peering at Die, eager to know his thoughts on the performance.

Die closed the door behind himself and then glanced around. Once he was sure they were alone for the moment, he grasped Kyo by the belt loops and pushed him back against the wall. His fingers slid up under the white tank top and then around to Kyo's side as he pressed an array of kisses over Kyo's jawline, working his way to his ear. He knew he was a sweaty mess, but he didn't care. Kyo wasn't much less sweaty anyway.

"You were amazing, baby... and the crowd was utterly in love. They nearly crushed me in all their adoration." He chuckled.

Die's touch instantly sent heat spiraling through him. He let out a soft groan, he hand coming up to tangle in Die's rather wet locks. 

"Mnn...you braved the pit for me?," he murmured out, turning to press his lips to Die's cheek.

Die let out a quiet laugh. "Of course I did. Though... I thought I was going to die." He chuckled. "You've got some brutal fans, darling."

Kyo tilted his head back and smirked. "I didn't think they'd get so riled up during a non-DIR EN GREY performance..." He chuckled then looked around before drawing Die's head down, pressing their lips together in a slightly desperate fashion, his post-concert need still hovering around the edges.

Die groaned into the kiss, his hands leaving Kyo's sides to slide up over his chest, pausing at his hardened nipples to rub his thumbs over them in gentle circles. And then he was migrating upward, his hands forming around Kyo's neck for a moment in a tease of certain things they'd once done, and then up into his short, shockingly blonde hair. He ran his hand through it as he nearly shoved his tongue into Kyo's mouth, uncaring who might see them right then, too riled up from a number of things, not the least of which being Kyo's performance... and the crowd, the friction... and even his anger.

Kyo was quick to react to Die's touches, his chest pushing up against his hand, a groan escaping him at the attention. A shudder rippled through his body as Die's fingers closed around his neck, his nails digging into the other's back. He sucked hard on Die's tongue, pushing his hips forward the slightest bit to show just how riled he was himself.

Die finally pulled back from the kiss, panting softly. He slid his fingers back around Kyo's neck again, caressing the skin and then backing off completely. "I have the worst urge to give you post-show head... find us someplace, baby."

Kyo stared at Die with hooded eyes as his lover stroked his neck. He groaned at the idea of what Die wanted to do and immediately took off down the hallway. He debated for a few minutes then smirked when he came up Sugizo's currently empty dressing room. It would be at least another hour before the elder musician would return to it. He tried the handle and was delighted to find it unlocked. Looking back at Die, a made a come hither motion then slipped inside, not bothering to turn on more than a lamp.

Die gave Kyo a shocked sort of look and then a grin before he slipped in after him. He closed the door and then leaned back against it for a moment before making a decision. He grasped Kyo by the wrist and tugged him to the couch, nearly tossing him down before he knelt in front of him. He didn't waste a second in opening his lover's pants, fondling him through his underwear for a moment, using them to wipe up any residual sweat before he pulled the material back and immediately leaned down to take him in his mouth, whispering out, "Everything was perfect tonight," before he took him in.

Kyo stared at Die as his lover leaned against the door. He was about to sit on the couch when he was rather unceremoniously pushed down onto it. Letting out a huff of breath, he spread his legs slightly, gazing down at Die while the other got his pants open. 

A soft moan slid past his lips at the fondling then an even louder one came out as Die took him in. His lover's words made him grin widely, his head dropping back as his fingers dug into Die's hair. "Fuck you're amazing..."

Die went to work on Kyo like a sex-starved maniac, his head bobbing quickly, lewd sucking sounds coming from everything he did, one hand resting over his own bulge, the other roaming Kyo's body. He started at his thigh, worked his way to his hip, and then further... and further until he was pinching at his nipple while he nearly gagged himself on Kyo's cock.

It didn't take long before Kyo was letting out some rather loud moans as Die worked on him. He pushed his hips up, reaching out to claw at his lover's back as he took him down his throat practically. "Die...oh Gods..."

Die moaned and groaned, making a general racket as he sucked Kyo off, obviously enjoying himself beyond usual. Popping off his dick, he panted out, "I thought about it... in the pit, while I was staring up at you." His eyes glittered faintly, and he gave Kyo a dirty smirk. "Pretty sure the dude in front of me has a story for a lifetime if he noticed who I was." With a breathy laugh, he leaned back down and slid his tongue from base to tip and then swirled around the head.

Kyo opened his eyes to peer down at Die as he spoke. A smirk formed on his lips and he let out his own huff of a laugh. "Hnng...I got worked up but not nearly as much...but oh Gods baby...your mouth.." He tugged Die's hair, not being exactly gentle with it.

Die licked his lips a bit and then shivered before he pushed his mouth down on Kyo's cock again. This time, he pushed his tongue along the edge of Kyo's foreskin, ringing his tongue around the overly sensitive area and then pulling back to lave over his piercing. He tongued the ring for a while before letting it go and then moaning softly, pulling off again.

Kyo loved everything that Die did when he gave him head but the way he teased his foreskin had him especially worked up, his hips bucking upward. "D-Die...oh my fuck..."

Die gently laved his tongue back over the head of his cock, finally starting to bob over him again, moaning as he went, groping himself rather boldly, his other hand still fondling Kyo in a wide variety of ways. The vocalist rode the wave of pleasure as long as he could before he could feel himself losing control. His cock throbbed between Die's lips and his threaded his fingers in his hair once more, pushing his head down a bit more insistently. Within another minute, he let out a soft cry as his orgasm slammed into him, his cock spurting down Die's throat.

He pulled back after the initial spurt, shooting the rest of his load onto Die's face, shuddering as he gazed down at him. "Fuck..."

Die barely realized what Kyo was doing before he was getting a face full of his load. He closed his eyes and let it happen, panting softly as he felt the warmth splatter all over him. Some part of him was even more turned on that Kyo would be so blatant about it where they could very well get caught. He knelt there, panting, his face covered in his lover's jizz, a somewhat self-satisfied look on his face.

Kyo slumped back after he'd painted Die's face with his offering. He stared down at his lover, soaking in the utterly debauched look he had right then. "Hnng..."

Die reached in his pocket and pulled out a slightly damp tissue to wipe near his eyes with. With that done, he sort of did a cursory mop of his face with it and then pushed himself up to toss it in the trash near Sugizo's mirror. He paused there, giving himself a look and then snorting. He looked like he'd been through hell and possibly lost. The pit had not been kind, that was for sure. He pulled a few more tissues from his box and wiped up the rest of the cum before grabbing a bottle of water and opening it, just dumping half the contents on his head and then taking a few small sips from the rest of it.

Kyo watched as Die cleaned up before standing up and going over to him. He slipped his arms around his waist and rested his head on his shoulder, ignoring the dampness. Peering at the two of them in Sugizo's mirror, he smirked and slipped his hand down, grasping Die's sizeable arousal.

Die breathed out a quiet groan when Kyo touched his dick. He leaned forward on the countertop, leaving the bottle there and then staring at Kyo in the mirror, smirking at their size difference and how much that alone tended to turn him on, though he'd never once admitted it to Kyo. His hips pressed forward, urging Kyo to do something about his arousal while they were like this, hoping he'd get the hint on what he wanted.

Kyo licked his lips, pressing closer to Die, turning his head to nip at his neck. He debated it for a few moments before finally unzipping Die's pants, pushing them and his underwear down to expose his cock. 

He watched in the mirror as he wrapped his hand around Die's length, stroking it slowly as he pressed up against his ass.

Die's eyes sparkled as Kyo started to unfasten his pants. He bowed his head and watched as Kyo's hand slid around his cock and began to stroke him. He bit his lower lip for a moment and then breathed out a moan, looking back up into the mirror instead, enjoying watching Kyo's face while he did this as much as his lover's hand on his dick.

Kyo caught Die's eye in the mirror, flicking his tongue out over his neck, tasting his salty skin. He picked up the pace on Die's cock, his thumb swiping over the tip.

Die watched him, shivering slightly as he moved his hips a little bit, moaning softly. He was so horny after all of this that it wasn't going to take him long and he damn well knew it. He released a groan and then, "Where should I put it?" in a breathless whisper.

Die's question made Kyo pause his actions. He so desperately wanted to watch Die jizz in the mirror but given that this was Sugizo's dressing room rather than his own, he felt that would beyond inappropriate. He thought about it for another moment then pulled away, shifting to kneel in front of Die, opening his mouth in a silent answer. It would be much less likely to leave a mess this way.

Die glanced down at where Kyo had stowed himself - halfway under the table - and he smirked a bit, shifting and then taking hold of his own cock, pumping it quickly for roughly another half a minute before his hips jerked forward and he let out a low moan. He attempted to aim himself, getting it into the other's mouth, though doing so while he was having a rather incredible orgasm was more of a challenge than he would have thought.

Kyo's eyes stayed locked on his lover's face as the other jerked himself off the rest of the way. He moaned as he felt cum spurt into his mouth and over his tongue. He licked his lips then his chin, getting what Die left there. 

Finally, he reached up with his hand, swiping off the last little bit from his cheek and sucking his finger clean. "Mmm, gorgeous..."

Die breathed out a quiet laugh as he leaned his hip on the table and waited for a moment, his dick too sensitive to put back in his pants just yet. He stared down at Kyo and then smirked, his thoughts still swirling around how much their height difference got him off sometimes... today apparently being one of those times.

Kyo sat there for a few more moments then stood up, following suit with Die's clean up. He took the water and a tissue and wiped his face then drank down a few gulps before tossing the bottle in the trash.

The guitarist took a few moments and then put cock away, grabbing another bottle of water and intently putting it into his body, one sip and then pause... one sip and then pause. He finally shifted to the trashcan, washing one of his hands with it and then the other, sighing and then drinking more of the water.

Kyo adjusted his clothing then watched his lover drink the water down. Once Die was finished, he licked his lips and moved over to pull the guitarist into a tight hug. "Thank you for braving the pit for me, it truly means a lot..."

Die let out a soft chuckle, wrapping his arms around his lover and reaching to rub his hand through his short blonde hair again. "Anything for you, my porcupine," he murmured.

Kyo nuzzled against Die's neck for a moment then pulled back, his eyes slightly narrowed. "Porcupine...?"

Die grinned. "Your hair. It's like petting a very soft porcupine... and I like it."

Kyo snorted and playfully batted Die's hand away before leaning up to kiss his lips softly. "You just like it because you have something to hold onto now..."

"Guilty as charged... and to play with," he put his hand right back, ruffling at it a bit and then smirking.

Kyo huffed though there was no real irritation to it. He tweaked Die's tummy then nodded towards the door. "I suppose we should return...I'd hate for Sugizo to actually find us in here...

"Mmm... you think he'd be mad?" Die lightly caressed Kyo's ear and then stepped back, making sure there was nothing evidence-wise besides the trashcan that they'd been in there. He headed for the door, pulling out his phone and showing it to Kyo. "By the way... this happened."

Kyo shrugged a little then followed behind Die. Pausing to look at his lover's utterly destroyed phone, he gaped and took the device in hand, studying it. "Holy crap, what happened to it?"

"The very same thing that happened to me in the pit. Your fans." He snorted and then shook his head a little.

Kyo winced and felt a thread of guilt slide through him. He pocketed the phone and shook his head. "I'll replace it in the morning then..."

Die reached out and cupped Kyo's cheek for a moment. "I didn't show you to make you feel bad. I showed you because I wanted you to see the intensity of what you cause. Sometimes I don't think you truly understand it... standing on the outside of it. I know I definitely needed that experience to remember, to feel it all over again."

Die's words gave Kyo pause, and he found himself chewing his lip as he contemplated them. It was true that he was incredibly clueless when it came to what was going on out in the crowd. The only real example he had was watching videos. 

He turned to look up at Die and offered him a soft smile. "You're right...I don't understand it...maybe I'll hold onto this to remind me."

Die stood there, his hand on the door handle as he quietly offered, "What they feel, Kyo... it's not just admiration. It's not just the joy of a band and of music. You are a direct line to everything that they feel, that they need to get out and can't. Even in your calmest of moments, you are a balm that heals, a buffer to their own struggles. And while, yes, I'm beat to fuck and back after being in there... I don't care. Simply put, you heal."

Kyo blinked slightly then had to look away as Die spoke again. He clenched his jaw as emotion swept through him, gripping him by the heart. Of course it was what he'd proclaimed he wanted his music, his art to do but hearing it, and knowing that it was truly what was happening had a profound effect on him. 

He found himself reaching out to wrap his arms around Die, burying his face against his chest as he digested it all.

Die cradled Kyo against him, holding him close and soothing him as best he could with his presence and the feeling of his being so close to Kyo's own. Kyo held onto Die, breathing in his scent, ignoring the pit odor attached to it. It was a lot to take in when he really thought about it and eventually, he had to reel himself back before he went too far. 

Sighing, he lifted his head and looked up at Die. "Thank you."

Die gently slid his thumb over Kyo's lower lip and then smiled at him. "Let's... get back to your band, hmm?"

Kyo pursed his lips to kiss at Die's thumb then nodded. "Yeah, they're probably partying without me!" He chuckled then grasped Die's hand, leading him down the hall.

Die snorted softly and then nodded. "Yes, but you had a better party by far, didn't you?" He made sure to close the door behind them, following along with him, a smirk on his lips.

Kyo grinned, pausing outside the door to Sukekiyo's dressing room, hearing laughter of more than just his band. "I would definitely have to agree."

Die smirked at his lover and then reached past him, pushing open the door and waving him in with a, "Tada!"

Kyo huffed as he was ushered into the room but immediately waved and bowed to everyone. He moved to get him and Die glasses of champagne then sat down on the couch, waiting on Die to join.

Die came in with him and took a seat next to him on the couch, accepting the drink and smiling at the others, who looked rather bouncy and happy on their own. Kyo sipped his drink slowly, peering around at his band members. He was truly pleased with how everything had gone, the energy having flowed rather nicely.

Die crossed one leg over the other, blinking languidly at the others as they moved around and spoke, watching as they interacted even with Kyo. He did feel like a bit of an outsider in here, not used to not being a part of what Kyo was involved in. But he supposed this was what he should have expected and though it did make him a bit unsure of himself, he wasn't upset.

As the evening wore on and Kyo imbibed a few more glasses of champagne, he grew bolder with the way he was acting with Die. His hand would linger on his lover's thigh too long, or he would lean against his shoulder and purr, seemingly not minding the others in the room.

By the time Die had his second glass into him, Kyo was already ahead of him in the drinking department, Die intentionally not drinking as much, knowing he was dehydrated from the pit and that he needed to drive them home afterward. The more Kyo started touching him, he more amused he became, wondering if anyone was going to notice them at some point or not.

Kyo found himself laughing and generally having a good time with Die and the members of Sukekiyo. He was well on his way to tipsy when he pushed himself up off of the couch, intending to go to the restroom. 

What happened instead was he took one step, stepped on his own shoelace and promptly tripped backwards, falling pretty much in Die's lap with a soft "oof".

Die gasped when Kyo fell back on him, his arms going around him instantly, fearing he'd roll or slide off into the floor. He gave a quiet chuckle and shook his head a little. "Okay... where were you going?" he asked softly, trying to sort of make it look like he'd tugged Kyo down... for the vocalist's sake.

Kyo let out a laugh when someone else called him a klutz. He waved off concerned questions and squirmed around in Die's lap, peering at him. "To take a piss...."

Die patted his hip a little. "Okay, upright, and we'll go adventure to the toilet together."

Kyo licked his lips then shifted back to stand up, going at it more carefully this time. He wobbled a teeny bit on the spot, grinning at Die. "The champagne is sweet...I really like it."

"I... can see that," Die returned quietly, a small chuckle leaving him before he took Kyo's arm and guided him across the room and then out the door. "Where are the bathrooms?"

Kyo allowed himself to be guided about, a grin plastered on his face. "To the right...I think."

Die turned them toward the right and then plodded off down the hallway. "How many did you have?"

Kyo had to think about the question as he walked down the hall with Die, holding onto him for support. "Uhmmm...4 or 5? I'm now sure to be honest..."

The guitarist gave a soft snort. "Okay... well, you drink some water next, okay?" He sighed, coming to the end of the hall. "No bathroom." He turned them around and started back toward the other direction.

Kyo nodded to Die's instructions then looked around, frowning before glancing back down the hall. "Crap...maybe...that way?" He rubbed his forehead then gave a little groan.

Die just led Kyo along. "You doing okay? Not gonna puke on me?" He made a little face, recalling some of his own hangovers that had started far too early into the night.

Kyo stopped and turned to look at Die, eyebrow raised. "C'mon baby, I know I'm a lightweight but I'm not that weak..."

The redhead gave a grunt and then patted Kyo gently, finally finding the bathroom and pushing open the door, directing Kyo inside. "Just gotta piss?"

Kyo wandered into the bathroom, his hand coming to brace himself on the wall as he did. He offered a little nod at Die's question as he made his way to a urinal, starting to unzip to go about his business.

Die hovered by the door, torn between wanting to watch and not wanting to get anywhere near in the way or give Kyo any ideas that might lead them to getting caught by Kyo's new band.

Kyo went about taking his piss, going for what seemed like forever before it finally tapered off. He sighed and shook off before tucking himself away and washing his hands. 

Once that was finished, he returned to Die, leaning up on wobbly tiptoe to kiss him lightly. "I'd really like to just go home...and celebrate there."

Die gently stroked over Kyo's shoulder and then nodded, giving him a small smile. "That can be arranged. Let's just go get your stuff, okay?"

Kyo eyed Die for a moment then nodded, slipping out of the bathroom and heading for where his other bandmates were gathered. Part of him felt a little bad for leaving early, but he knew that they wouldn't mind. All throughout the recording and rehearsal process, they'd gotten used to his moods.

Die followed after Kyo, not holding him now, hoping he'd be okay. When they entered the room, he went to gather up a bag of bottled water, sticking a spare bottle of unopened champagne in there as well.

Kyo quickly made his apologies, thanked everyone for a job well done with the show, and then moved to gather up his stuff. It took him slightly longer than usual given his inebriated state but finally he was finished and with a final wave, walked over to Die. "Okay, we can go..."

Die smiled at the other and then led him out, waving to the others before he closed the door back and slipped out. He led the way out the back where he'd parked, gesturing to Kyo. "Might wanna put your hoodie on; I imagine people are still hanging around."

Kyo considered it for a moment then nodded, tugging his hoodie on, pulling the hood down low.

They stepped outside a few moments later, and Die kept the bag close, the weather outside a bit biting. He shivered as they plodded along, no one really paying them any mind just yet.

Kyo glanced around as they walked, thankful no one seemed to notice them. He was doing just fine until he missed stepped off of a curb, twisted his foot and very nearly fell face first onto the pavement. With a loud curse, he caught himself on a pole and clung to it, scowling at the curb. "Fuck!"

Die basically panicked as Kyo started to go down, nearly dropping the water bottle bag, though he didn't because it was on his wrist as well, and then basically grabbing Kyo, making it overly obvious how concerned he was.

A nearby guy came rushing over at the same time, stopping short of the pair of them and then quietly offering his help. "Anything I can do to help? That looked painful there, man."

Kyo kinda flailed in panic as someone else came up to them. He waved his hand, bowing his head, more to hide his identity than anything. "Ah, no, it's fine..." He started off walking again, more than a little annoyed at himself.

The young man glanced at Die, studying him for a second, obviously recognizing who he was, but he said nothing. He just gave them a parting little wave. "Take it easy, man," and then he was wandering off.

Die bit his lip a little after the guy turned away, trying to hold back his amusement over the situation.

Kyo waved his hand as the guy departed then began walking again, though his steps were decidedly slower now. "This is why I don't drink...," he muttered to himself, walking out ahead of Die before stopping and turning to look at him. "Where did you park?"

Die chuckled a bit. "Don't worry about it... doesn't matter." He declined to mention that the guy had obviously recognized him. He didn't seem the type to go telling everyone or anything else. He gestured across the parking lot. "Right there. It was as close as security would let me get."

Kyo huffed and finally made his way over to Die's car, leaning his hip against the side of it. "Remind me next time to clear you through all security..."

"Yeah... please do. It's a pain in the ass to not be recognized or known or... oh god, I sound like a total twat." He unlocked the car and slid inside, putting the bag in the floorboard on Kyo's side and then closing his door. He went about getting his seatbelt on, sighing softly and shaking his head.

Kyo stared at Die then let out a laugh, shaking his head as he slipped into the car with him. "You twat...," he repeated, snickering as he got his own seatbelt on.

Die snorted, starting the engine and then pulling out once Kyo was secure. "Seriously, I just went full-on snob, didn't I?"

Kyo grinned and nodded. "You did...but you're right though. At least in this case...my fiancé should certainly be able to get to me whenever and however..."

Die let out a soft cough, choke sound and then chuckled at the last part of Kyo's statement. "Mmm... however, hmm?"

Kyo smirked and leaned over when Die came to stop light. He pressed his face against his lover's neck, nipping the skin there before settling back in his seat. "Yes, however..."

"Good god... how do I always forget that being drunk makes you horny as fuck... and open about it?" He chuckled softly.

Kyo smirked, reaching over to dance his hand up Die's thigh, definitely feeling the warmth pooling in his belly now. "Mm, I don't know, because I tend to fuck your brains out every time I drink...am I really that forgettable?" He gave Die a mock pout, completely teasing his lover.

Die snorted and then shook his head. "No, not at all forgettable, baby." He reached for Kyo's hand, pushing it up a bit higher and then lightly patting his hand.

Kyo chuckled lowly, waiting for another red light then moving his hand to cup Die through his pants. He flexed his fingers, squeezing a bit then pulled away, licking his lips. "If I wasn't concerned for our safety...I'd so give you road head right now."

Die let out a quiet purr. "Like you haven't before?" He snorted softly. "Suddenly concerned while you're drunk as all hell?"

Kyo bit his lip then laughed softly. "I'm not that drunk, baby..."

"Mmm... you weren't at all last time."

The vocalist pursed his lips and looked at his lover for a few moments. "You just want it that bad, hmm, baby? Need my lips around your cock right now?"

"Well, you could put it that way," Die returned, a smirk on his lips.

"I did...how would you put it?"

"That I have a thing for semi-public sexual acts, and you're just drunk enough for me to push it... but that I won't for the simple fact that you are drunk?"

Kyo stared at the side of Die's face for a moment then huffed out a laugh. "Sweetheart....I love you." He grinned then leaned over, pressing his lips to the side of Die's neck, kissing then nipping the skin there. "To be honest, I'd love for you to pull over right here, right now so I could climb into your lap and ride you..."

Die flicked his gaze to the other and then back to the road. The offer was on the table and he wanted it - dear god did he want it - but he wasn't going to. "Let's get home, and we'll re-evaluate that once we get there, hmm?" He reached to touch his hand. "And I love you, too."

Kyo could see Die thinking it over and that alone had him turned on. He hummed at his lover's response and gave his kiss another nip, this one harder than the others. "As you wish..."

Die lightly touched the other's hand, rubbing over it gently before he reached to turn on his turn signal, pausing and then making a left turn.

Kyo turned his hand, clasping Die's fingers and settling back into his seat, his eyes sliding shut. He was quiet the rest of the ride, nearly dozing after a while.

Die pulled into the driveway, cutting the engine and then squeezing Kyo's hand again. "Wake up, baby doll."

Kyo sniffed and opened his eyes, peering at Die for a moment before giving a yawn. "Mmm, what a gorgeous sight to wake up to." He leaned over to peck Die's lips, unable to get enough of touching him tonight.

Die chuckled faintly, gently pecking the other's lips. Pulling back, he licked his lips and then patted Kyo's thigh. "Out of the car, love." He picked up the bag of water and champagne and then slid out of the car.

Kyo did as he was told, slipping from the car. He had to hold onto the roof for a moment before he could start walking forward. He let out a laugh at his ridiculous balance, giggling as he made his way inside the house. He plopped down on the bench by the door and took his boots off then just sat there, waiting on Die.

Die got them into the house and then closed and locked the door. He smirked when Kyo plopped down, shaking his head before he removed his own shoes. Plodding off to the kitchen, he settled everything down and then pulled out a bottle of water, taking it back to Kyo, handing it over. "Drink."

Kyo got up and followed Die, nearly frowning at the water. He took it anyway though and cracked it open, taking slow sips from the bottle.

"Finish that, and we'll see about your.... offer," he murmured quietly, smirking at Kyo.

Kyo licked his lips and took a healthy gulp of water. "Are you bribing me?"

"I wouldn't call it that, actually." Die gave a little shrug and then pursed his lips as he gestured. "Couch is far more comfortable for those of us not well on the way to wasted."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head, turning to wander over to the couch, losing his jacket along the way. He flopped down and took another drink of the water, rubbing his belly as he did.

Die flopped over and then laid his head on Kyo's lap, chuckling softly. "Mmm..." he turned his head to kiss his stomach. "Ache or...?"

Kyo reached down and pushed his fingers through Die's hair, peering down at him with heavy lidded eyes. "Nah...but if I said yes, would you keep kissing it?"

"Mmm... maybe I would. You gonna try it?" Die asked softly.

Kyo grinned then put on a false face of pain. "Oh…my stomach…so much pain...it hurts, baby." He rubbed it again, just above Die's head.

Die rolled his eyes and then chuckled, shifting around and then pushing Kyo's shirt up, kissing at his stomach a few times, gently licking over his belly button and then chuckling as he pulled back.

Kyo let out a pleased sound, his stomach twitching faintly at Die's kisses. When the other pulled back, he full out pouted, lower lip sticking out. "It was almost cured...why'd you stop?"

The redhead gave Kyo a look that clearly stated he thought this was amusing, but he was going with it, and then leaned back down, nipping lightly at the skin, lapping over it in apology just after.

Kyo attempted to tell Die to keep going but all that came out was a rather loud moan. He shifted and pushed at Die's head, urging him downward towards the obvious bulge in his pants.

Die shifted a bit uncomfortably when Kyo started pushing his head down toward his crotch. He was still stuck on the issue of consent versus Kyo being drunk. After a few moments of war with himself, he decided he'd give Kyo the pleasure he was literally pushing his head down for, but he'd stop it there. 

He reached down to gently undo Kyo's belt and then lower his zipper and unfasten the button on his pants. Opening them, he delved his fingers in and retrieved the other's arousal, freeing it from the confines of his pants and gently starting to lap at the head of his cock.

Kyo was oblivious to Die's inner struggle, selfishly focusing on his own pleasure at the moment. Die released his cock from his pants, and he let out another moan, his hand moving to push into Die's hair. "O-oh…yes...so good."

Die moaned quietly as he began to suck on the tip of his dick, his tongue flicking over the slit and gently running under the edge of his foreskin a few times before he pulled up with a soft pop. He worked up some spit and then slid his head all the way down on him, moaning quietly.

Kyo let his head drop back, his hips jerking upward to seek more of Die's mouth. He didn't care that this was the second time his lover was blowing him that night, it felt good anyway. "Fuck...Daisuke...love the way your mouth feels on my cock."

Die let his eyes flick up to look at Kyo's face as the other spoke, a smirk trying to tug at his lips as he began to bob his head, groaning quietly around his dick as he started to feel the swim of arousal in his system.

Kyo, in his inebriated state, couldn't seem to stay still. He writhed against the couch, panting and huffing out moans as he first gripped at the cushion then went back to tugging Die's hair only to move his hand to his shoulder. He let out a groan and stroked his other hand over his stomach, scratching at the skin lightly as he started coming undone. "Die..."

Even as he moved, Die's eyes went to the other's hand that was scratching at his stomach, his eyes sparkling at the realization that he was growing more and more aroused by the moment. He pulled up on his shaft and pushed his tongue against the slit again, tasting pre-cum there, the slightly bitter twinge sending him back to bobbing his head a bit more frantically.

Kyo pushed his hand under his own shirt, tweaking his nipple. Die's actions had him crying out with pleasure, his entire body thrumming with it now. "Fuck....fuck Die....gonna cum..."

Eagerly, Die bobbed over Kyo's cock, his eyes on his lover's face now, watching... waiting on it. He was always so gorgeous when he came, after all. It wasn't another minute before Kyo's face contorted with pleasure as his orgasm slammed into him. He jerked his hips up, mouth hanging open in a silent scream as he came.

Die swallowed it all down, licking at the head before he finally pulled back and rubbed at Kyo's thighs gently, smiling up at him. "Feel good?"

Kyo finally settled back into the couch after a few moments, letting out a soft sigh as he gazed down at Die. He stroked his fingers through his lover's hair, petting him more than anything. "Oh yes, so good, baby."

After a few moments, Die gently went about getting Kyo tucked back in and his pants done back up. He leaned up and kissed him briefly and then murmured, "I'll be right back." He wandered off to the lower level bathroom and closed the door, forcing himself to take a piss to get rid of some of his erection, nature forcing it down at least enough to take a wizz. Once he was done, he flushed, washed up, and then came back out, plopping down next to Kyo and gesturing at his water. "Drink it up, baby."

Kyo had slumped back against the couch, his eyes closing while Die was gone. He cracked them open and peered at the water before gesturing to Die's crotch. "I'd rather drink you up..." He laughed at his pathetic attempt at a pun then shook his head, reaching for the water a taking a few sips.

"Later, baby," Die returned, his voice velvety smooth as he leaned over to kiss his cheek.

Kyo let out a soft sound and turned to bury his face against Die's neck. "Mmm, fine, fine...." He sipped at the water some more, trying to stay awake. However, between the concert, two orgasms, and alcohol, he was losing the battle fast, he hand going slack on the bottle he was holding, nearly dropping it.

Die quietly slid his hand under the bottle, catching it as it fell from Kyo's fingertips. He retrieved the cap and put it back on, placing the bottle to the side and just relaxing there with Kyo leaning on him. He'd give him more of it when he was more coherent.

Kyo shifted, finally just letting himself lay against Die, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as he dropped off. He let out a snore and woke himself up, laughing at it then sighing. "Die...," he mumbled out, planning on saying something but losing it as he drifted off again, his body relaxing.

Die chuckled faintly, finally shifting and getting a good grip on Kyo, picking him up and testing to make sure he could still carry the other. He maneuvered himself carefully up the stairs, pausing every few moments to ensure he didn't fall and then finally got to the bedroom, placing Kyo on the bed. He wandered off to go and take a quick shower, making the fastest work of a shower he ever had at home and coming back. After putting on some pajama pants, he crawled into bed next to Kyo still-sleeping form, sliding his arm around his waist and laying his head on the pillow with a small yawn.

Kyo hardly moved while Die was carrying him along. He didn't stir again until his lover's arm was wrapped around him. He smiled and shifted closer, his hand going to grasp Die's, holding onto it as he fell back asleep completely.

It took Die quite a while, but he finally drifted off along with Kyo, clasping his lover to him, a little smile on his face.


	63. Chapter 63

Die sat at his computer desk in the midst of all of his sound equipment. He had been playing his guitar with his headphones on for a few hours now, determined not to actually disturb Kyo and knowing the soft plink of the strings without the amp wouldn't wake him up at all. Currently, he was leaning past his guitar, flicking to the next email from a fan and then starting to read as he went back to idly playing through his exercises, his foot tapping on the carpeting gently. Snowball watched him interestedly from under the desk, her eyes glowing in the semi-darkness as she stared up at his quickly moving fingers.

Kyo awoke to the midday sun streaming in through a crack in their curtains, hitting his face just so. He squinted and groaned, scrubbing his hand over his face as he assessed his level of hangover from the alcohol he imbibed after his show. He had a dull headache, and his stomach seemed a little rocky but not too much, so he pushed himself up and padded into the bathroom, taking a much needed piss. Once he was finished, he rinsed his hands then his face and set about brushing his teeth. After, he took a couple of headache pills then wandered out to find Die.

It didn't take him long to pick up on the sound of his lover's guitar sans amp, and he made his way to the source, finding Die hunched over the instrument, not one but two cats watching him carefully. He slipped in and perched on the arm of the chair nearby, waiting on Die to be finished with his current exercise.

Die didn't even seem to realize anyone was around him. He paused for a second to hit the Page Down button and then went right back to his playing. A few minutes later, he finished up the email and the exercise, finally reaching for the mouse to exit the email and go to the next one, still not realizing he had company.

Kyo sat for a while, nearly dozing as he watching Die fiddle around. Finally though, his butt got tired of sitting on the chair arm. He stood and carefully moved over, peeking over Die's shoulder just long enough to see that he was reading fan-mail. A soft smile crossed his features, and he shifted back, clearing his throat, hoping Die wouldn't jump out of his skin.

Hope was a small-founded thing, because without him doing a thing with his guitar for a moment as he opened the next mail, the sound of Kyo clearing his throat was the only thing he heard. He let out a small bewildered sound, his head jerking around as if he'd been caught watching dirty porn or something, and he stared at the other in shock for a moment before laughing and relaxing. Reaching up, he pushed his headphones from his head and sighed. "Scared the shit out of me."

Kyo let out a laugh as Die jumped anyway, and he shook his head. He moved over to drape his arms around Die's shoulders. "Sorry, I was really hoping you'd hear me come in...but you didn't...and I got tired of waiting."

Die's hand drifted up to lightly run over Kyo's tattooed flesh, stroking lightly at the fine dusting of hairs, always enjoying the way they stood on end when he touched them just so. Dipping his head, he kissed Kyo's knuckles and then murmured, "Was just doing exercises and catching up on fan-mail. I've been neglectful... I mean I'm still back in July of last year. I feel horrible for that."

Kyo hummed softly at the attention to his skin, thoroughly enjoying it. He turned his head and press a few kisses to the side of Die's neck then glanced at the screen. "Still though, you're reading them...and that's kind of amazing." He chuckled and shook his head, standing up and brushing his fingers through Die's hair. "Admittedly, I feel guilty for not reading most of it but...well, you know why I can't."

Die was quiet for a moment and then cleared his throat. "I read them." He gave a little shrug. "Someone should, and the staff member that used to quit, so I'm eons behind on it, but, eventually I will have read them all as well." He leaned into the touch in his hair, his eyelids fluttering shut. "Sometimes when I ask you a strange question it's because someone got me wondering about it."

Kyo's hand stilled at Die's confession. He let out a soft sound and bent down, kissing the top of the other's head before continuing on combing his red locks. "That's sweet of you...if there's ever anything in them that maybe I really should address....let me know?"

Die let out a quiet hum. "I may or may not have sent out an anonymous letter on a few occasions. Never signed or addressed, and I'm sure the people involved would never understand completely where it came from, but it generally seemed necessary." He was silent for a moment. "I'm not entirely sure I should have admitted that, but... there it is."

Kyo huffed out a quiet breath and moved to hug Die from behind, smiling against his hair. "Thank you, love. I'm sure it touched their hearts one way or another."

There was a moment in which Die said nothing before he finally cleared his throat and then murmured, "So... how's the hangover?"

Kyo leaned against Die in that quiet moment, a soft sigh escaping him. At the question, he finally stood upright again and sniffed. "I have a slight headache, and my stomach's a little weak feeling...but other than that, surprisingly fine..."

"Good, good, I was a bit worried. You were pretty gone for a while there." He smirked a bit and then finally shifted to put his guitar down, unplugging the headphones and making sure everything was away and whatnot. He leaned over the computer for a moment to quickly read the message he had up, snorting and exiting out of it. "Fans drunk mail me, and it's hilarious," he offered by way of explanation before turning around in his seat and peering at Kyo.

Kyo hummed in response then watched as Die detached himself from his equipment. Once that was done, he moved to settle himself in Die's lap, easily fitting in it without feeling like he would fall. "Gotta love drunk emails..." He chuckled then looked up at Die, licking his lips. "Yeah, I haven't drank that much in a while, but...I do remember most of the night."

Die patted his side and then lightly squeezed the tiny amount of pudge he found there, loving Kyo's itty bitty love handles when he wasn't actively attempting to bulk up for the next lengthy tour or anything. His fingers played there for a moment as he murmured, "Good, it's nice not to black out... sure signs of starting to become an alcoholic... says the alcoholic." He snorted softly, rolling them slightly so he could see the computer screen over Kyo's shoulder, his chin resting there as he scrolled through the titles of emails, quietly deleting some that were obviously spam.

Kyo squirmed a bit when Die toyed with his pudge, though he didn't really mind. At the alcoholic comment, he gave a little frown and shook his head before burying it against Die's chest. After a few moments, he spoke up again, "So...why didn't we actually fuck last night? I know I was horny as hell…and was pretty sure you were too..."

Die took pause at that, his hand stopping the clicking and scrolling, completely abandoning the mouse. He breathed out a quiet sigh and then leaned back in the chair, cradling Kyo against him, rubbing his side. "You were drunk enough there was no way there was any ability to give consent. I made a concession and gave you pleasure because you basically put me where you wanted me. Even that was shaky ground given how far gone you were though..."

Kyo blinked a little and shifted around before lifting his head to peer up at Die. "Consent? You have basically...permanent consent. I'm confused..."

The redhead gave Kyo a soft look and then sighed, shaking his head a little. "For one, debate the word ‘basically’ in there. For two, even if you've said ‘yes’ a hundred times, that does not mean the answer is still ‘yes’ the next time. Assumed consent is not consent; it's a dick move."

Kyo bit his lip, considering what all Die was saying. It wasn't something he'd thought of much with his and Die's relationship, the two of them being fairly symbiotic when it came to all thing sex. However, this was a new light being shined on things, and it gave him pause. How many times had he taken advantage of Die's drunken state? It was unsettling to even think he might have pushed Die into doing something he didn't want.

Die studied Kyo for a long few moments, and then, almost as if he could sense where his thoughts were going, he murmured, "It's different with me... I'm nearly always somewhat drunk. It's like everyone else's sober." He shrugged a little. "I think... if we agree to something... we can be okay. I just read a lot of things recently, and it got me to thinking and... sort of upset about it." He reached out one foot to poke one of the cats with his big toe. "I want to make it clear that I always consent to sex with you unless I expressly state otherwise."

Kyo's brow furrowed, but he nodded slightly. Glancing down at what Die's foot was doing, he let out a soft sigh. It pained him that something made Die upset about their bedroom activities. It tarnished it, and he hated that. Licking his lips, he nodded again, turning back to look at Die's face. "Okay. And it should be clear that I feel the same…"

Die leaned in and gently kissed his cheek, his eyes closed as he murmured, "Say it... say those words."

The vocalist cleared his throat and mimicked Die's declaration. "I always consent to sex with you unless I expressly state otherwise." He reached up and cupped Die's cheek, stroking it with his thumb. "Okay?"

Die gave a little nod and then smiled at him. "Thank you, love..." he pinched his side again and then slid his warm hands up both sides and then flat against his skin before tickling him.

Kyo returned the smile then squirmed again, letting out a very unmanly squeak at the tickles. "Stop that...you're making me sound like a 13 year old girl!"

Die chuckled softly, but gave in, letting go of his lover's sides and leaning back a little more. "Mmm... okay, okay, since you asked sooooo nicely."

Kyo huffed then leaned in to kiss Die properly, sharing his minty fresh breath with him. "Thank you..." He grinned then tweaked Die's nipple without warning, snickering as he did so.

Die sucked in a gasp of air at the tweak and then retaliated, grabbing Kyo's and twisting a bit. Completely not expecting the retaliation, Kyo let out a soft sound, wiggling in Die's lap at the action.

"Really? Less of a sound to that?" Die snorted softly and then licked his lips.

Kyo pursed his lips, huffing a little. "Yes, well, my throat wasn't expecting to be put on the spot..."

Die leaned in and lightly nipped along his jawline and then pressed a kiss to the skin before murmuring, "I love you."

Kyo leaned into Die, going to stroke over his previously abused chest, letting out a pleased sigh. "Mmm, I love you, too, Koi."

The look on Die's face made it clear he was pleased with the name. "Okay... what are we doing today? Anything or just hanging around the house?"

Kyo shrugged his shoulders. "I've got nothing planned for today except probably answering a few phone calls about the show."

"Mmm, then what shall we go ahead and figure out something to eat? Leftovers? Italian?" He made a face that clearly stated he had moved on beyond breakfast and was well into wanting something more hearty.

Kyo sniffed and thought about it, rubbing over his stomach. He chewed his lip as he contemplated the choice then finally gave his answer. "Italian. I want something breaded and cheesy."

"How about... we call my favorite little place, and see if they'll be kind enough to let someone deliver since it's early and... they know me?"

Kyo grinned and nodded, leaning up to nuzzle into Die's neck. "Sounds fabulous..."

Die sort of dug around in his pockets for a moment and then pulled out his phone, flipping it open and starting to flick through his contacts. "Chicken parmesan and fettucine alfredo for two?"

Kyo contemplated for a moment then nodded. "Yeah, sounds good to me. Maybe add some tiramisu for later?"

"Great." Die found the contact and dialed it. He held a quiet conversation with the lady on the other end, sweet talking her into delivery by mentioning the article and his reputation with the girl who'd said he was the father of her child. He said he'd pay for the gas and the employee’s time and finally got off the phone, smirking at the other and gently kissing his neck. "Fixed it."

Kyo listened to the conversation, biding his time nuzzling against Die's neck. He let out a soft chuckle when Die finally hung up, his hand going to push through his hair. "Mm, good. Sometimes it's nice to exercise that celebrity thing we've got..."

"Once in a while... not usually, though." Die nipped a bit at Kyo's jaw and then murmured, "I love you, pumpkin pie."

Kyo hummed then snorted at the nickname. "I love you, too...but...pumpkin pie?"

"Just tryin' it out." Die chuckled and then shrugged slightly.

Kyo peered up at Die then laughed, leaning in to nip his bottom lip. "Then I guess that makes you cherry pie."

"I guess it does," Die returned, snorting softly before he pushed his face back into Kyo's hair and sort of snuffled around for a moment. "Fuzzy."

Kyo chuckled, moving his head back and forth a bit. "Fuzzy pumpkin pie...doesn't sound good..."

"Ewwwwwww," Die returned quietly. "Sounds moldy." He moved to Kyo's earlobe and gently nipped at the tip top of his ear. "Why did you take out your last piercing, baby?" he purred out.

Kyo let out another laugh then a soft groan at the nip to his earlobe. He contemplated the question then reached for Die's hand, lacing their fingers together. "Each piercing represented some pain, some hurt that I had experienced...Then, as each wound was closed or healed, I removed them...You've healed the last part of me that was damaged in that way...so I no longer need it."

The answer nearly choked Die up. He pursed his lips a bit and then licked the last spot gently before pressing his face back into Kyo's hair, nuzzling. His hand creeped down, fingertips gently running over Kyo's cock. "And this one?"

Kyo smiled softly then let out a soft groan, his hips jerking slightly. "That one...is an exception. It was purely for the pleasure it would bring...and I haven't regretted it in the least."

Die gave a little nod, his fingers trailing back up to a more reasonable place. He kissed Kyo's ear again gently and then offered a soft, "As much as I loved your piercings, I'm glad to know that you have healed."

Kyo hummed softly, squirming a bit then settling back down. He looped his arms around Die's neck, leaning into him. "I may return them someday, but then it will be purely superficial..."

The guitarist gave a little nod and pressed his forehead to Kyo's now that he was facing him on the chair. "Thank you for telling me... for allowing me the knowledge of what this means to you."

Kyo smiled and leaned in, kissing Die on the lips. "You're welcome, darling. I promise one day you'll find all of the puzzle pieces...even though I'm not intentionally hiding them."

"It's half the fun," Die breathed out quietly, his lips pressing to Kyo's own again for a few moments, utterly still.

Kyo smiled against Die's lips, stroking the back of his neck with his fingers. He adored these sweet moments between them, ate them up.

Die nipped lightly at Kyo's lower lip and then smiled softly, touching noses with him for a fraction of a second before he scooted back and blinked at him a little. "You're adorable, and I'm the only man on the planet who can call you that."

Kyo wrinkled his nose a bit then rolled his eyes in mock annoyance. "I'm not adorable...I'm hardcore." He held the face for a few moments then laughed, pushing at Die's chest. "Just not in public, yeah?"

"Not in public," Die breathed quietly against his lips before claiming them again, feeling the tingling from everything that hadn't been done the night before start to ignite in him. But he held it back, kept it at a simmer, pulling back and smirking a little.

Kyo was quick to react to the kiss, his own lust coming to a quick boil. He was left wanting when Die pulled back though, and he gave his love a look that told of his desires. He leaned in and nipped Die's bottom lip for good measure before leaning back. "I should really go shower...since I didn't last night." He made a face, not at all wanting to get intimate with Die with stage sweat from the night before.

Die let out a little grunt and then patted Kyo's side gently. "Shower up; I'll keep reading emails until our food gets here." He smiled softly at his lover.

Kyo grinned and gave Die another quick peck before sliding out of his lap and wandering off to the shower. He made rather quick work of getting clean and going about shaving his stubble off. Once he was done and rinsed off, he stepped out and dried himself before dressing in a pair of lounge pants and one of Die's old T-shirts. Making his way back to where Die was, he plopped down on the sofa nearby, peering at the guitarist. "How much longer til food?"

Die spent his time with Kyo in the shower going through email, just as he'd said he would. He deleted a few with nude pictures in them and a few spam mails that hadn't been caught by their filter. He still wasn't sure how on earth he was getting nudie pics at his age, but he certainly was somehow.

By the time Kyo came in, he was uncomfortably on edge and getting annoyed with the onslaught of naked emails. He finally realized what date he was on in his email and he flushed slightly, huffing out a laugh just after Kyo asked his question. "Should be about time... and dude, I just realized why there's like a million naked pics in here. I'm on December."

Kyo raised an eyebrow then snorted. "Happy birthday, here's my titties?"

"Yeahhhhhh... and pussy and dick and god just everything." He sighed as he opened another one and then nearly choked. The way his stuff was set up email-wise it pulled up any link they put in automatically when it was a photo so he could see it right off the bat. But sometimes that got real annoying. On screen there was a man, his ass to the camera, spreading his butt cheeks. Die covered his eyes and sighed. "Jesus. Like seriously, could half of these pics even just be artsy and not so very look-at-my-ass-or-tits-or-whatever?"

Kyo huffed out another laugh then peered at Die when he made a weird sound. Not wanting to intrude on Die's privacy but feeling nosey anyway, he got up and moved to Die's side, staring at the screen. "Christ...what the hell?" He felt a surge of protectiveness go through him, and he reached out, closing the email for Die. "Ew."

Die shuddered a bit and then blanched. "Random tits are one thing, shit like that is just... god, man, why?" He dropped his hand and then moved to delete the email, making a face. He scrolled back a few and opened it, pointing. "This one is nice though... this person always sends stuff. I have to translate it since she sends it in Spanish, but... she's nice as far as I can tell and just sort of tells me about good things."

Kyo huffed a bit then shook his head before looking at the one Die was point out. He had no idea what it said beyond "hello" and maybe something about cars. "That's nice...so you do remember frequent senders?"

"Some of them. When they send often enough that you notice the name or it's unique... or their writing style is." He shrugged a bit, closing the email and then jumping a little as Snowball flopped on his foot and the doorbell rang at the exact same time.

Kyo hummed and nodded, thinking back on a few memorable emails he'd gotten and some names that had stood out to him. When the doorbell rang and Die jumped, Kyo jumped too, looking at Die. "Food's here...and apparently we're both startled by it..."

Die let out a laugh and then gently pushed Snow back before he stood up. Padding past Kyo, he moved down the stairs and then opened the door, fishing out his wallet. He knew he'd only been charged for the food, it was common when this happened, and he hated it, so he always gave gas money and made sure they understood that's what it was for. Not a tip and thus not an insult. 

The girl on the other side stood there, looking nervous beyond belief, and incredibly wide-eyed. "D-Die?" she asked quietly, as if she couldn't believe what was going on.

Kyo wandered after Die, ready to help carry their food to the table. He arrived behind his lover just as the girl uttered out his name. A frisson of panic went through him at the idea of being recognized, old habits dying hard, but he tamped it down and stood there, though he didn't say anything.

Her eyes flicked to Kyo briefly and then back to Die as she nervously held out his food.

Die took the bag and held it out to Kyo, a kind smile on his lips as he did so. Pulling out the money, he took the initiative, taking her hand and putting it in it. "This is for gas for your car because you brought this to me, okay? I know you guys aren't paid for gas money." 

She nodded a bit dumbly at him and then sort of stuffed the money into her pants before turning away, still a bit dazed as she started down the walk.

For a few moments, Die stared after her and then he leaned against the door, a smirk on his face. "Really? You recognize me, and you're just gonna walk off dazed?"

Kyo took the food from Die, standing there and watching the interaction between the two. He let out a soft chuckle as she started to walk off, shaking his head. It was adorable and slightly refreshing from the more excitable reactions.

The girl paused and then half-turned, gazing at him, a smile trying to find its way onto her lips. "You have company, I don't wish to bother you. Thank you for the gas money... I... uh... well... thank you."

Kyo smirked faintly at the girl's remark then just turned to put the food on the kitchen table, going about setting everything up with utensils and plates. 

Die pushed himself away from the door and made his way down the steps and over to her. He gestured toward her car. "I'll walk you."

Together they made their way wordlessly to her car and once she unlocked it, he opened the door for her and she got in. "Have a wonderful evening, okay?"

She nodded and wished him the same, Die closing the door and then stepping back as she departed the driveway, heading off down the road.

Die walked back to the house, stepping inside and closing the door, smirking a bit at Kyo as he closed and locked it. "Mmm... such a different sort of incident."

When Die returned, Kyo had already poured them glasses of wine and had settled in his seat, grinning at his lover. "Mmhmm, kinda nice really...I'm sure she'll think about that for a long time...if she's a fan that is."

"No idea, but she did know my name, and that's not what's on the order name with the restaurant." He shrugged a bit and made his way to sit down, smirking a bit as he plopped on his chair and sniffed at everything. "Mmm... smells amazing, as always."

Kyo shrugged then started serving them up helpings of each, getting Die's plate done first then his own. "Yeah, my stomach has very loudly agreed with you." He chuckled then dug in, groaning almost in a near orgasmic manner as he ate.

For the next few minutes, Die simply feasted on the items before him as well, all too happy to be putting food into his belly. He groaned faintly, chowing down on everything in his usual not-so-ginger manner.

Kyo wasn't exactly going easy on his own food as he shoveled it into his mouth. He paused long enough to wash some down with a drink of wine then carried on, looking very pleased.

The redhead watched as his lover ate heartily, glad to see it. He ate until he couldn't any longer and then sat back, holding his stomach and groaning. "Fuck man... so full."

Kyo polished every last bite on his plate then sat back, washing it all down with the rest of his wine. He rubbed his slightly protruding stomach and groaned. "I'm so full I look pregnant."

"This time it's you with the food baby!" Die let out a laugh and then grunted, patting his stomach again. "Seriously should have stopped before I did."

Kyo chuckled and sighed, patting his chest before a loud burp escaped him. "Oh yeah, that's better..." He looked at Die and grinned. "C'mon baby, let's go have wild sex now..."

Die stared at Kyo for a moment and then tilted his head back with a groan. "Worst timing ever, baby. I couldn't vigorously move right now if I wanted to. Give me like... an hour and then yes, fucking yes, please."

Kyo smirked. "Oh c'mon...it'll be fun." He was very clearly joking, feeling nowhere near capable of anything sexy right then. He sighed and stretched, rubbing his stomach once more.

"Fun... if that's your definition of fun, we have found some very dissimilar fetishes." Die breathed out a laugh, shaking his head.

Kyo snorted then finally stood up, another loud burp escaping him as he went about closing up the containers of leftovers. "Yeah...no. I'm not into being miserable during sex."

"Good... me either." Die didn't move for once, just watching Kyo clean up. Mostly because he wanted to stare at his ass, but partly because he could.

Kyo put things away then moved to brush his hand through Die's hair, kissing the top of his head. "I'm going to go stretch out on the bed....care to join me?"

Die stifled a yawn and then pushed himself up. "Mind if I keep practicing on my acoustic while we sit?"

Kyo smiled and shook his head. "Not at all, you can serenade me with some horribly cheesy love song." He chuckled and started for the stairs.

"Love song... good lord, we'll have to see if I even know one." He picked up his wine and padded after Kyo, smirking to himself as he passed the cats going downstairs, both of them obviously looking for leftovers or scraps.

Kyo laughed loudly as he made his way into the bedroom, flopping down on the bed on his back with a sigh. "If you can't produce a love song...then something else will do..."

Die found his guitar and picked it up, bringing it in and settling down beside Kyo. He adjusted his situation on the bed and then pulled the pick from between the strings, quietly going about tuning his guitar, humming under his breath.

Kyo shifted around and scooted to where he could lay his hand on Die's thigh, sighing softly. He watched as the other prepped his instrument, loving the methodical way he did it.

Once Die had it tuned, he began to play random pieces of chords until finally, he chose a tune and began to play it, his eyes closed as he slowly rocked back and forth, his fingers flying over the strings.

For nearly an hour Die continued before he glanced over, finding Kyo fast asleep, sprawled out, his head still on Die's leg. The guitarist carefully moved Kyo and then his guitar, gently going about getting them both laid down for a good nap. Honest to god, the older they got, the closer they got to the running jokes about old people needing nap time. He snorted a little and then slid his arm around Kyo, breathing out a soft sigh as he closed his eyes. Ever so slowly, he relaxed into the mattress, allowing sleep to claim him.


	64. Chapter 64

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: hamhamheaven

Days had gone by since either Die or Kyo had had time to themselves. The constant work on new album stuff and the incessant necessities of day-to-day life got in the way more and more, it seemed. For Die, that meant a number of things. First and foremost, he was lonely. It didn't really take much for Die to feel that way: just a little drop in contact, and he'd start into that part of himself that insisted he was, in fact, lonely. Not alone. No, that was not the issue. Kyo was there each night, but they so rarely got time to themselves as a couple that he was nearly starved for affection. 

But Die was also Die: he never complained about it, just taking life as it came to him and doing his level best to deal with it. Even now as they trudged up the driveway after another meeting, the snow lying thick on the cement, Die could feel the cloud of his emotions hovering over his head – the constant worry, the voice that told him if he fucked up something he'd lose the love of his life. It was just in Die's nature to worry.

He unlocked the door, reset the alarm, and then ditched his jacket and shoes. Trudging into the kitchen, he went about making sure the cats had food and the bunny had water and fresh greens. He was still debating giving the rabbit to the kid down the street, but he was somehow deeply attached and just couldn't quite do it. Perhaps the next foreign tour he'd find it in him to do it, since rabbit sitters were far rarer than cat sitters.

He washed up and then pulled out a can of coffee drink and shook it up. Popping it open, he pulled out his phone and slid the lock on the screen, giving it a bit of a wide-eyed look and then quickly shutting some things down. Obviously, his last personal session, he'd forgotten to exit the browser where he'd been viewing less-than-work-appropriate material. Though, honestly, trying to hide his other needs from a rather exhausted lover was sort of getting tiring as well. He always felt a bit wrong about getting off if he knew Kyo would find out. So that basically meant anything at home when Kyo was home was out of the running. And that meant he'd resorted to the nearly teenage act of finding a few minutes in a bathroom stall at work while no one else was in there.

He moved around the island and went to flop on the couch, putting his feet up on the center cushion, leaning back and sipping at his drink. "So, how far did you get today?" he questioned Kyo, making an assumption that he was even still within earshot, not looking up from where he was studying the can in his hands.

Kyo, being the sort that gets absorbed into whatever projects he has going on at the time, had failed to notice Die's downturn in mood over the past few weeks. He did, however, greatly miss the affection and sex. Sadly, by the time they were finished with their work for the day, neither of them had any energy left to do anything other than crawl into bed. He hated it but moved forward, throwing himself into his projects.

When Die had returned home, he had been using the downstairs bathroom and so had not heard his lover until the other spoke as he exited the room. 

"Eh, far enough," he answered, moving to stand in front of Die as he snatched his coffee and took a sip. "Not bad..."

Die allowed Kyo to take his drink from him, more than okay with sharing. He shifted a little and then nodded, sort of absently staring up at Kyo. "Yeah... me, too. At least far enough Kaoru won't feel overwhelmed anyway." He tilted his head back and reached to run a hand through his hair, tugging lightly at the ends before letting it go.

Kyo grunted in way of response then handed Die his can back, moving to flop on the couch next to him. He shot his lover a sidelong glance the leaned back.

The guitarist just accepted his can and remained where he was. After a few long minutes of silence, Die sat up and drained the rest of the small can, putting it aside and then rubbing his face with the heels of his hands, sighing quietly. He gave Kyo a little glance, trying to gauge how tired he was without being intrusive. But after a moment, he gave up and pushed himself up, turned so that his behind was closer to Kyo and his feet away from him, and then settled basically with his head in Kyo's lap, long arms looped around Kyo's legs.

Kyo watched Die finish off the coffee then blinked as the redhead moved to use his lap as a pillow. He bit back a sigh, figuring Die must be exceptionally tired tonight. Shifting around, he placed his hand in Die's hair, brushing his fingers through it softly. "Mm..."

Die pressed into the touch of Kyo's fingers, letting out a tiny sound of approval as his hair was stroked in such a manner. Any affection at all was definitely on Die's to-do list for the evening, and even if this was what he got, then he was better off than before. Even just such a small touch was already calming him somewhat, pushing back the boundaries of his mind sort of half freaking out constantly.

Kyo glanced down at Die's reaction then smiled the slightest bit, pushing his fingers through those red locks a bit more. He shifted some more so that Die's face ended up very near his crotch as he attempted to get comfortable.

The instant Die was confronted with Kyo's crotch nearly in his face, he honestly couldn't hold himself back any longer. He let out something rather like a whine and then moved, one arm winding behind Kyo's body, his cheek nuzzling against the fabric that covered his lover's dick for the time being. A groan loosed itself once he was sure exactly where Kyo's length was at, and he pressed his mouth against the material of his jeans, teeth lightly grazing, his tongue darting out even though all he was getting was denim.

When Die nuzzled against his crotch, Kyo had no control over the moan the slid from his lips. His hips jerked as Die's teeth scraped over him, despite the denim blocking him from the sensation. "Oh…Gods..."

That was all it took to encourage Die and let him know that he wasn't the only one wanting this, at least. Eagerly, his fingers started to unfasten Kyo's belt buckle and then unfasten his jeans. Once he had them open, he parted the fabric and leaned in, mouthing him through his boxers, sort of enjoying the sensation of giving Kyo a blowjob, but not really.

It had been so long that every touch Die gave him had Kyo shuddering and sighing with pleasure. His length was rapidly growing hard as Die mouthed him through his boxers, making him moan again. He pushed his hand in Die's hair and tugged the strands a little, gazing down at him.

Die gave it a few more teasing moments before he yanked the boxers out of the way and nearly gagged himself on Kyo's cock he was so eager to get at it. Bobbing his head, he let out a loud moan, everything about what he was doing honestly sloppy in comparison to how he usually was.

Kyo dropped his head back against the couch, one hand in Die's hair the other roaming over his lover's shoulders as much as he could touch. He was about to beg Die to get on with it, but then he was being engulfed in delicious wet heat and all he could do was cry out as his hand tightened harshly in Die's hair. "Jesus, FUCK Die!"

Die went at him for a while before he grew nearly desperate himself. Letting out a whine around Kyo's dick, he shifted himself, reaching down and starting to undo his own pants as he still bobbed his head over Kyo's cock. Honestly, he wanted far more than his own hand again, but he was so worked up he needed the touch, and there was just no way Kyo could even reach that part of him from their current position. Plus, he didn't know if his lover was too tired to do anything else, and he didn't want to end up how he had the night Kyo had been drunk again. Hard up and ignoring it was not on his list of things to do for the day, that was for sure.

Kyo was close to coming absolutely undone when the sound of Die's zipper brought him back to his senses. He groaned and, with some amount of regret, pushed at Die to get him to stop. "C'mere...sit in my lap..."

Something like agony burned in Die the instant Kyo started pushing at him to stop. He let out a whine, but pulled back, doing his best to look composed, though honestly that was a hopeless battle. Fumbling a bit, he used his shirt sleeve to wipe up some of where he'd drooled everywhere and then sat up. He hadn't gotten his cock even out of his pants yet and for that much he was sort of thankful, realizing how much like an idiotic teenager he had to look right then as a man verging on forty who had just been desperately sucking on his lover's dick.

Kyo stared at Die for a moment then huffed out a groan. "Die...." He stood up and rid himself of his pants then basically attacked Die, yanking his pants down enough to expose his rather hard cock. Without bothering to explain himself, he pushed Die back against the couch and got into his lap instead, moaning when their crotches brushed one another. He grasped Die's shoulder and began rutting against him, groaning. "Fuck..."

Die sort of watched the whole thing feeling like he was only about half with it... until the moment Kyo's cock came into contact with his own. In that moment it was like reality crash-landed back on him, and his hips jerked up harshly, the action nearly toppling them from the couch. A loud keening whine left him as he grabbed hold of Kyo's hips, holding on tight, his hips starting to move with an unusual lack of rhythm for him.

Kyo shifted and balanced himself, allowing Die to take control, bucking his hips now and then. He noted how incredibly desperate his lover was and knew then that this would not be enough tonight. With that in mind, he leaned down, lathing his tongue over Die's neck, one hand pushing under Die's shirt to tweak his nipple, eager to fully pleasure his lover.

That was about all it took before Die was already losing it. It was embarrassingly fast and he knew it, but he also had zero control to actually stop it from happening. His body went sort of rigid, a strained sound coming out, and then cum was spurting all over his abdomen and shirt.

Kyo took in the way Die's body stiffened and bowed, shuddering a bit at the sight of it. He glanced between them, watching Die paint his stomach and shirt. Licking his lips, his pushed his cock through the mess some then finally eased back, gazing down at Die, smirking. "My baby's rather desperate, I see..."

Die couldn't have been more mortified in all honesty. He'd already cum once today and now here he was, losing it like this, so quickly it was shameful. He tossed an arm over his face and mumbled out, "Just... been a while." Hell if he was going to remotely admit he'd already gone at himself today and still went off like a cooked grenade.

Kyo licked his lips then leaned in, trailing his finger through the mess on Die's stomach. "It has...and I've missed you..." He shifted a bit then dipped his head down to start lapping at the mess Die had made, making pleased sounds. He was rather oblivious to Die's embarrassment.

The actions of his lover forced his hips to involuntarily jut upwards, and Die found himself nearly squirming in the next few seconds. He let out a whine and then closed his eyes, reaching up to hold Kyo's head gently in place for a moment. "Would you... please...?" He gently pushed at Kyo's head, attempting to move him down toward his balls as he squirmed around a bit.

Kyo glanced up at Die then smirked, nodding his head before shifting downward. He lapped at Die cock briefly then moved to suck one ball into his mouth. "Mnn..."

Die let out a little groan when Kyo did as he wanted, his body sort of relaxing from all the tension he'd been having in it. With a sigh, he rubbed over Kyo's still-fuzzy hair, his head lolling to the side as he breathed out, "I need you to take me. Please..."

Kyo licked his lips and let out a soft groan at the request. Die wasn't the only one feeling needy lately. He tugged his lover's pants off and out of the way, stroking his hands up his legs and over his thighs once he was done. Flicking a glance to Die's face, he took two fingers and gathered up the remainder of Die's cum, smearing it all around the digits. He slid his fingers down, stroking over his lover's entrance, pushing into him with little resistance thanks to his orgasm.

Die let out a loud moan the moment it was clear what Kyo was going to do with his cum. He squirmed a little and then shivered, arching into his touch as the digits slid into him. "I want it from behind," he finally breathed out, shivering a little at just the idea.

Kyo slicked his tongue over his lips and looked back up to Die's face, a smirk playing on his lips. "Mmm, gladly..." He thrust his fingers into Die for a few moments before removing them and wiping them off on a tissue. He patted Die's hip and moved back, reaching down to stroke his own cock for a moment. "Get on your knees for me, baby..."

Die did his best not to get impatient, even though he was honestly squirming with anticipation inside. He shivered a bit and then pushed himself up once instructed, moving to get on his knees on the couch. Intentionally, he moved so that he was straddling the two cushions, pushing his ass-end sort of back toward Kyo.

Kyo was faintly amused by Die's impatience, but he had no desire to harm his lover by inadequate prepping. Still though, when Die's ass pushed back towards him, he gave it a good smack then positioned himself behind the redhead. 

He smeared his own precum over the head of his cock then pressed the head against Die's entrance, groaning as it slipped in easily. He eased himself the rest of the way in then stilled, letting out a huff of breath. "Fuck, you're always so tight when it's been a while..."

Die bucked his hips and then whined, stilling himself so that Kyo could actually get all the way inside him. He shivered and then bit his lip, closing his eyes as he pressed his face against the couch. "Needed you... so bad."

Kyo shuddered as Die moved, reaching to grasp his lover's hips. He was so hard it hurt, and he was suddenly desperate to fuck Die into the couch. "Gods...me, too," he murmured before finally pulling back then pushing forward with a hard thrust. A moan escaped him as he begin thrusting into Die's body, having next to no control with his pace or rhythm, his need too great.

Die's solution was just to let Kyo go at him, his head resting on the couch, his body bouncing with Kyo's movements. His eyelids fluttered closed, and he breathed out what could have only been described as a sigh of relief, nearly melting into the couch as he was taken.

The way Die relaxed beneath him had Kyo going at him even harder, his breath coming out in heavy pants. He shifted back on his heels, pulling Die with him, changing the angle of his thrusts completely. "Die!"

Die was achingly hard, his cock brushing against the couch with each movement they made, and he found himself thankful for the slickness of the cum that had slid down his cock already. His head lolled to the side, and he rubbed his cheek against the leather, bona fide bliss settling over him.

Kyo shifted them again, making his cock thrust deeper into Die, pulling a loud moan from him. He was so close to losing but wanted to hold onto to his bliss just a little longer. He wrapped an arm around Die's waist, grasping his cock and starting to jerk him off in time with his thrusts.

A little tremor went through Die's body as Kyo's fingers wrapped around his cock. He shivered and then murmured out a quiet, "Yes," about nothing in particular.

Kyo hunched over Die's body enough to press his face against the other's neck, murmuring how damn good it felt to be inside him and other declarations of pleasure as he bucked into him. It felt so damn good.

Die was so incredibly lost in the emotion of the whole thing that he didn't even realize he was going to lose it until he was. A soft breath left him and then his cock was twitching, cum spurting out over the couch as he sort of buried his face against the leather and sighed, relaxing even more.

Kyo shuddered, gasping in some amount of surprise as Die's body tightened around his cock when he came. He stilled for just a moment to just feel Die's orgasm then he grasped his lover's hips and started slamming into him almost roughly. It wasn't but another few seconds before he let out a guttural cry and started cumming, filling Die's passage with his offering. "Fuck!"

Die just lay there against the couch, looking more content than he had in weeks, a blissed-out look across his face, eyes unfocused and his mind finally calming down. Kyo thrust into Die a few more times then collapsed against him, shivers of pleasure going through him even as he slowly relaxed. He let out a low moan and closed his eyes, everything within him unwinding and unknotting.

Die fished around for a moment until he finally got ahold of Kyo's hand, squeezing his fingers and then letting out a soft grunt of a sound, looking ready to sort of become a puddle of Die. Kyo squeezed back then shifted the tiniest bit before settling again, unwilling to leave Die's body just yet. He nuzzled into the hair at the base of his neck, mmming softly.

It took Die a while to come down from it, but eventually he reached up to rub at his face. grunting faintly and then blinking a few times. "I think... you broke me. In a good way."

Kyo huffed out a laugh and pressed a kiss to Die's skin before finally moving back and pulling free of his lover's body, groaning as he did so. "I'm...not sorry then..." He ran his hand over Die's lower back, watching as some of his cum trickled from his body, enjoying the sight.

Die lay there for a little bit and then smirked to himself, whispering out, "Lick it up, my little pet," just to see how Kyo would take it, out of the blue like this.

Kyo's eyes widened at Die's words and a spike of hot lust went him. He hesitated for just a second before leaning over, whispering out, "As you wish," as he ran his tongue along the edge of Die's crack. Groaning to himself, he leaned in more, spreading Die open with his thumbs as he started lapping at his entrance, pushing his tongue in to get more of the cum.

Honestly, Die hadn't expected it to turn out like this. But the instant that Kyo breathed out those words, he knew that even if he had to strain for it, twice just wasn't enough tonight. As Kyo lapped at his tight hole, he pushed his hips back a little, giving him better access and then waited until he was sure he was cleaned up. "Sit back."

Kyo smirked and gave Die's taint a flick of his tongue before sitting back as requested, licking his lips like a cat with cream. He was already growing aroused again, his cock half-hard between his legs.

Die moved then, turning himself around and then settling on a different part of the couch that wasn't covered in his cum. He pointed at the mess he'd made. "Lick that up."

Kyo glanced at Die then inclined his head slightly before shifting around, putting his ass basically in Die's face. He bent over and began lapping at the cum, ignoring the fact that it had cooled and was slightly unpleasant. He made sure to make as much noise as possible too, letting out several "mmms".

Die nearly snorted at Kyo's overplay on it, but he managed to keep it inside. He smirked a bit and then reached out to grab Kyo's ass. First he squeezed it, then he kneaded it, then lightly smacked it before leaning over to bite at one cheek. "Mmm... Kyo ass, the best ass."

Kyo groaned softly at the attention to his ass, undulating his hips slightly. He finally lifted his head to reveal a mostly clean spot on the couch. "All done..."

"Good... now my cock," Die purred out softly.

Kyo smirked and shifted again, moving to settle himself on the floor in front of Die. He put on then best look of submission he could muster then leaned in, beginning to slowly run his tongue over Die's dick going from base to head then down to his balls.

Die let out a quiet little groan, reaching down and running his fingers through Kyo's hair. "Good... just like this."

Kyo moaned lowly, taking Die into his mouth for a moment, sucking him then releasing him as he moved back to his balls. He drew one into his mouth, suckling it, scraping his teeth lightly over it then doing the same to the other, eyes flicking up to Die's face.

After a few moments of Kyo moving between his balls, Die finally reached down, putting one hand on the back of Kyo's head and pushing him down so that his face was pressed into the hair at the base of his dick. He didn't say a word, just kept him there, waiting to see what the reaction would be.

Kyo made a confused sort of sound as he was pushed into Die's pubic hair. He looked up at his lover then flicked his tongue out, licking over the hair there.

Die breathed out a quiet laugh, rubbing his hand through the other's hair and then smirking down at him. "No argument. I like that." He pushed him back and then pointed toward the downstairs restroom. "Bathroom. Now."

Kyo snorted softly then sat back, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand as he stood up. He tugged his shirt off finally, tossing it in the heap with the rest of his clothes before sauntering towards the bathroom, definitely eager to see where this was going.

Die stared after him for a moment and then growled out, "Get back here and put that shirt back on this instant. Did I tell you to do that?"

Kyo blinked then turned, lips quirking up into a smile. "My apologies, Sir..." He grabbed up the shirt again and slid it back over his head, standing there to await further instruction.

Once Kyo had put the shirt back on, Die waved him back off toward the bathroom. "Go now." He pushed himself up and did a quick once-over of the couch to get up the remaining ick before he started toward the bathroom, instructing, "Kneel on the shower floor."

Kyo moved off to the bathroom, undeniably turned on by Die's play right then. He got himself into the shower and knelt down, automatically putting his hands behind his back, eyes cast to the ground, his dick jutting out from his body.

Die came in shortly behind Kyo and closed the door to keep any roaming pets out. Stepping into the small shower as well, he stared down at Kyo and then reached to stroke over his cock a few times. "Make a guess as to what I want."

Kyo lifted his head to gaze up at Die, licking his lips. "You want to soak me in your piss?"

"And how do you feel about that?" Die asked, the way he was asking it making it clear he didn't really care, but that he was sort of baiting Kyo.

Kyo bit his lip and gave Die a false annoyed look. "I don't want you to. I don't like it."

Die tilted his head at him and then held his dick, starting to piss, though it splashed the floor between them, not directly on Kyo. He stopped it after a few seconds and then pursed his lips. "Pull your shirt up above your nipples."

Kyo pursed his lips as Die started pissing anyway. He shifted back and did as asked, tugging his shirt up enough to expose his nipples. "Like this?"

Die moved then, kneeling in front of Kyo, his body pressed against the other's. Once he made sure his dick was tucked up between them, he grabbed Kyo's ass and then groaned as he started to piss, just full-on letting go, nothing to hold back at all.

Kyo couldn't help the groan that escaped him when Die pressed against him, rubbing up against his cock. He struggled a little bit to get away, hoping to evoke some form of retaliation from Die.

Die just pressed Kyo tighter against him for the duration, enjoying himself too much to stop it to retaliate. As soon as he was done, however, he basically shoved Kyo back into the puddle he'd made and then smirked down at him in an evil sort of manner, looming over him. "Are you scared? Are you gonna piss yourself you're so scared?"

Kyo squirmed and wriggled as Die continued pissing on him, the warmth of it hitting his cock and making it twitch, despite his feigned discomfort. 

He let out a grunt when he was pushed into the puddle, shooting Die a glare then settling with a defiant look on his face. "No. Fuck you."

With no deliberation at all, Die's hand shot out and wrapped around Kyo's neck. He didn't squeeze, didn't aim to actually hurt, but he knew Kyo's wants after all this time, and he played on it now, hissing out, "And now?"

Kyo shuddered as Die's fingers wrapped around his throat, his hips jerking up of their own according. This was such a dangerous game to play, but damned if he didn't want to take it just the slightest bit further. He turned his head away, refusing to meet Die's eyes or answer him.

Slowly Die's fingers tightened, not enough to hurt, but enough to pinch off the blood flow just enough to force Kyo to feel a bit light-headed. "I asked you a fucking question."

Kyo finally let out a whimper, his cock twitching hard as it felt like his air was being cut off. "Yes," he whispered out, shooting a glance at Die then groaning before biting his lip.

Die's gaze slowly drifted down Kyo's body to watch his cock expectantly, his fingers still holding him somewhat tightly.

Kyo closed his eyes and focused on voiding his bladder. He was hard so it was rather difficult, but he finally managed, piss trickling out then finally coming at full speed. He grimaced in what he hoped was an embarrassed manner, a shiver going through him.

Groaning, Die pushed himself forward, his hips pressing to Kyo's own as the other urinated, obviously trying to get more of it for himself as the whole thing occurred.

Kyo couldn't really hold up the act of not being aroused anymore and finally moved his hand to grasp his cock, moaning at his own touch. He pointed it more towards Die, pushing out his piss as hard as possible, giving a faint whimper.

Die only allowed the action because it benefitted him, otherwise he'd have probably done something more to Kyo to get him to 'cooperate'. He let go of his neck, basically plopping him back further into the puddle and then leaned over, grabbing his hair and yanking his head back hard before he crushed his mouth against Kyo's own.

Kyo's hand grappled at Die's chest as he kissed him back hard. He finally finished up pissing, pushing the last few spurts hard. He moaned and clawed at Die's chest, panting with need by now.

This time, Die took a moment, debating his next action. At long last, he decided he could possibly pull it off and then moved back from Kyo, leaning against the wall and spreading his legs. "Come. Between my legs."

Kyo peered at Die for a moment before he did as asked, moving in between his lover's legs then stilling once more.

Die reached up and grabbed Kyo's shirt, yanking him down by it. Winding it up a bit, he used it to sort of haul Kyo around, hissing out, "Put your fucking cock in me. Now."

Kyo let out a gasp as he was jerked around. Die's command had him groaning and quite eager to obey. He debated for a moment then motioned at Die. "From behind...?"

"Subs don't ask questions," Die growled out, yanking again. "Now do it."

Kyo lowered his eyes then nodded, moving to spread Die's legs open. "Yes, Sir," he murmured out. He positioned himself and slid into the other's body, a moan ripping from his lips as he sank into his warmth.

Kyo's moan was met with one of Die's own, his head falling back against the wall. He kept a tight grip on the shirt that was holding Kyo close to him. "Fuck me hard. As hard as you can."

Kyo eagerly complied, reaching to grasp Die's hip for leverage. He shifted around a bit then began slamming hard into Die's body, the sound of it bouncing off the walls.

Die groaned, pushing himself up a bit so that the angle changed. "Fuck," he groaned out, his hand wrapping tighter in Kyo's shirt.

Kyo hung his head forward as he thrust into Die as hard as possible. His breath came out in gasps and moans as he slammed repeatedly into his lover's body, charging quickly towards his end.

"When you cum... keep fucking me until you think you're going to explode from the intensity of it," Die breathed out, leaning up enough to look down between them.

Kyo took that for permission to cum when he needed to and hissed out a "Yes, Sir," in response. He was able to keep it up for another few minutes before he lost it. He slammed hard into Die then stilled as he came, shuddering at the power of it. After a few seconds he started thrusting again, whimpering from his cock growing oversensitive.

Die watched Kyo's reaction after he'd cum, smirking up at him as the other looked more and more uncomfortable. Finally, he pushed Kyo back, letting go of his shirt and pushed himself up off the floor, coming toward him, already stroking his dick. "Open up."

Kyo grunted when he was forced back out of Die's body, a shiver rippling through him. He gazed up at Die and did as he was bid, opening his mouth for him, looking eager for what was to come.

Die pushed his cock into the other's mouth and took the back of his head, pushing him down a bit. "Suck me until I cum."

The vocalist groaned at the rough treatment, quickly starting to bob his head on Die's dick, taking him to the hilt. Die closed his eyes and then let out a moan, just allowing Kyo to do as he wanted on his dick, though he was honestly quite deep in pleasure. Kyo moved his hand up to cup Die's balls, squeezing them despite not being told to do such a thing. He sucked hard on Die's cock, burying his nose in the hair at the base and swallowing around him with a moan.

After a few moments, Die started to cum, shuddering a bit and then easing out a moan as he started to stroke over Kyo's hair. Kyo took every last drop of it, finally pulling back to look up at Die. He purposely let it dribble out over his chin before licking his lips with a moan.

Die eased himself back against the wall and then reached to turn on the water, hissing a bit as droplets of cold water sprayed both him and Kyo.

Kyo let out a soft sigh as he sat back. He squeaked and shuddered at the cold water, wrinkling his nose at it. "If it's just the same to you, I'd like to remove this shirt now..."

Die chuckled and then nodded. "Go for it."

Kyo gladly pulled the soaked garment off, dropping it on the floor of the shower and giving a slight shiver. "Much better."

The water heated up slowly, and Die just smiled down at the other man and then extended his hand. "C'mon. Get up."

Kyo reached out and grabbed Die's hand, standing up and moving under the spray with a sigh, greatly enjoying the warmth of it.

"How did that work out for you?" he asked softly

Kyo peered at Die then grinned. "Wonderfully....you?"

Die breathed out a sigh of relief. "I'm glad." He wanted to express that he hadn't been real sure on what had just gone down, but he thought it might ruin the effects of it for Kyo, so he didn't say anything about that at all. Instead, he just leaned down and kissed him gently, murmuring, "I love you," after.

Kyo hummed softly into the kiss, finally relaxing and wrapping his arms around Die. "I love you, too, baby."


	65. Chapter 65

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

It had been nearly three weeks since Kyo and Die had had sex, and Kyo was starting to feel a bit frustrated. It seemed every time he attempted any sort of foreplay, Die would skirt around it and either make excuses to go to bed or insist he had something else to do. They were currently sitting on the couch, watching a movie that they'd seen before so Kyo decided to try again. He shifted over and nuzzled his head against Die's neck, starting to lick and nip the skin there softly, his hand running up Die's thigh.

Die instantly responded to Kyo, just as he always did, his head tilting a little to let Kyo have better access. His hips ever so slightly lifted as he breathed out a pleased sigh. Arousal spiraled through him quickly, the lack of sex honestly getting to him as well. But even in the back of his mind, he knew it was coming... he could feel the start of the nagging worry start up, just the smallest of tugs for now. He had no doubt it'd grow into something he couldn't contain anymore sometime soon, though he really, sincerely, hoped it would stay at bay until they'd at least had sex for once.

Kyo continued on, advancing to slipping his hand underneath Die's shirt, grazing his stomach with his nails then moving up to pluck one nipple. As he paid attention to Die's chest, he moved to sucking and nipping his earlobe, his arousal growing quickly, pajama pants tenting out already.

Die wasn't far behind him, he was honestly more aroused than he was willing to even admit, his cock equally as hard, perhaps faster than Kyo's own. His hand came up to slide into Kyo's short blonde hair, his eyelids falling closed as they progressed.

Kyo let out a soft groan, finally moving to seal his lips over Die's, his hand moving south. He let his fingers lightly dance over Die's length as he pushed his tongue into his mouth.

Die was honestly nearing desperation with how much he really wanted Kyo. But his mind was starting to reel, his wants and desires making themselves known and forcing him into discomfort. Slowly, the forefront of everything in his mind became the idea that he wasn't being fair, that asking for what he wanted in this case was selfish. And yet... the thought of doing the opposite was so far out of his reach that it actually started to pull his desire back down the instant he considered it.

Dismay filled him, and he started trying to figure out what to do to back out again without seeming like a total fuck. Finally, he found the seeming answer, and he shifted Kyo's hand to his hip and moved onto his lap, making sure he kept himself far back from Kyo's cock, not wanting to end up grinding against him - though the thought sent shivers of desire running rampant through him. And somehow... the whole ordeal made him feel torn and like he wanted to honestly break down.

Nearly desperate, Die slid his hand into Kyo's pants and started to stroke him off, knowing he was just going to have to suffer tonight... pretend like he didn't want it. But that was getting harder and harder to do as time went on. And honestly, it was starting to rile up his anxiety levels.

Kyo felt his hand being moved to Die's hip, and he wanted to sigh. Just as it had been nearly every time he started something, Die was putting him off...again.

When the guitarists fingers slid into his pants and started jerking him off, he let out a loud moan, his hips jerking upward with desperate want. It took him a moment to regain control, and then he was grasping Die's wrist, pulling his hand out and holding it firmly. His eyes flicked to his lover's face as he moved to grope him through his pants, stroking his cock through the material.

Die's instant response to Kyo turning the tables on him was to arch into the touch and groan. He wanted it, and it was more than obvious. But he just couldn't quite get himself to stop thinking, and he nearly sobbed into Kyo's shoulder as he tried to wrangle himself back in.

Kyo mistook Die's anguish for desire and pushed it further, sliding his hand into his pants to wrap his fingers around his length, groaning softly as he stroked it.

Anxiety began licking at him, and Die found himself torn between wanting desperately to just cum and get it done with and scared of what he really wanted and why his emotions were in such turmoil. His fingers dug against Kyo's shoulder, and then he whined a bit. "I..." he couldn't even figure out what to say, his mind already starting into the screaming noise of an attack.

The moment Die actually whined in such a desperate way, Kyo stopped what he was doing and pulled his hand back. He pushed Die back enough to see the anguish and anxiety written on his features and frowned. "Die...what on earth...?"

Die stared at Kyo for a few moments, his heart honestly aching, and he closed his eyes, shaking his head a bit. "I... I'm sorry..." he whispered out in a strained sort of voice. "I just... I..." he honestly couldn't find the words for what he needed or how he even felt about what he wanted so badly he couldn't focus past it.

Kyo peered at Die and sighed softly, gently pushing the other from his lap. He stood up, held up one finger then disappeared into the kitchen. 

There, he took a few deep breaths and willed any lingering arousal away. He got a drink of water then grabbed two glasses and a bottle of Jack from the cabinet before returning to the living room. He set the glasses down and filled them before settling on the couch. "Okay, now, what is going on? Have I done something?"

Die sat himself down on the couch, his head in his hands as he did his best to will himself away from the anxiety that burned like a fire inside him. By the time Kyo came back, he'd actually fished out his pill bottle from the side table and shoved one of the smaller doses under his tongue, having finally gone to the doctor to get his own pills a few months prior. 

Once the Jack was on the table, he gratefully took a swallow of it to get the lingering taste of the pill out of his mouth and then sat back, trying to focus on letting it work, despite how much his hands were shaking and how close to breaking down he honestly felt. When the question was posed, he shook his head. "No... I promise you, you haven't done anything wrong."

Kyo took his own swallow of Jack then sat back, concern written on his features. He licked his lips and nodded a little, looking the slightest bit relieved at that. "Okay...then...what?"

Die fidgeted around, his nerves getting the best of him as he tried to figure out what to say or even do to not sound like a total asshole. Because that's what he felt like: needy, greedy, and a fucking handful of a fiancé.

He finally crossed his legs, wincing because his arousal hadn't fully gone away either. Finally, "I'm a selfish brat."

Kyo blinked, utterly and completely confused by what Die meant by that. "You're a...selfish brat? In what way? Sex?" he pursed his lips and shook his head. "If that's so, I don't agree..."

Absently, Die rubbed at his arm, the pain of his anxiety shooting down the limb forcing his mind to think about other more horrible things that that could signify. But he knew it wasn't, and he pushed it away, willing the medication to work faster. "Yes, sex," he returned quietly. "Answer me this... the last three times we've done it, how did we do it?"

Kyo watched Die's actions and reached out, picking up his glass and handing it to him. He sipped from his own again and then tilted his head. "With me taking you...? Is that what you're getting at?"

Die accepted the glass and then sat there with it, waiting on the reply. Once he got it, he gave a small nod and downed the entire glass at once. He put it down and then leaned forward, bracing his forearms on his knees as he stared at the floor between his legs. "Yes. And I'm being selfish... but it's what I want. I..." he closed his eyes and just spit out, knowing openness was a key between them, and he'd been violating it for weeks now. "I need it. I don't entirely understand why or what it is, but I crave it something awful and even when we do... it's... it's not quite enough." He looked utterly defeated at that, shame written across his face as he looked up at Kyo, feeling he owed him at least that much after a statement like that.

Kyo listened, his face schooled into a neutral expression. Mostly he was watching Die for signs of a full blown panic attack, unwilling to let his lover get that worked up. When Die finally came out with it all, Kyo found himself feeling a bit hurt at the idea that he wasn't enough for Die. He shifted back and pushed his fingers through his short, blond hair, chewing on his lip a bit. "Not...enough?"

The look on Kyo's face instantly told Die he'd said the wrong thing. Panic gripped him, and he shook his head, reaching for his lover. "No... no no, oh god, that did not come out right." He grabbed Kyo and pulled him close. "Oh Jesus, please don't think I meant it that way." His hands were shaking again as he held him close, rocking a little on his spot, completely unable to stop the action.

Kyo huffed out a little sound when he was pulled to Die. He wrapped his arms around him and hugged tightly. "Then please, Die, explain to me what you did mean...what's not enough?"

Die did his best to sort of calm down, trying to take a few steadying breaths as he realized if he didn't explain himself well enough, everything was suddenly on the line. Not just sex, not just getting what he wanted from it... but Kyo. The love of his life hung in the balance of all of it, and he was upsetting that delicate web something awful right now; a thrashing roach clinging to the lower quarter of a gorgeous web, wrecking it all in the desperate struggle to figure out what was happening to him. 

Pulling back a little, he placed his hands on Kyo's shoulders and did his best to keep his breathing steady as he tried again. "I know I have a whole list of fucked up shit on my list... I have so many things I enjoy sexually that it would give any other person a fucking headache just to hear it all, much less deal with it on a daily basis. You're a saint for that... and I couldn't thank you more for letting me be who I am. But... I..." he could feel the anxiety rushing up again, and he knew that stopping at a 'but' was not a good idea by any means, so he spit it out in a rush, "About a month ago, I was sort of going through random porn, and I found some things that really interested me. I don't know what it is about it that I like so much, but I do know that I'm afraid... and that I can't actually have it. I know my place, and that's not it. And it's causing me to be sort of stressed out about it in the end, because I desperately want it, but I'm being selfish and stupid."

Kyo licked his lips and listened to Die, growing more confused rather than finding any clarity. He sighed softly and shook his head, reaching up to cup Die's cheek for a moment. "Die, I need you to tell me exactly what you watched that you found interesting...and never mind about 'your place'...we have equal footing in this relationship. Period."

Slowly, Die let go of Kyo's shoulders, sinking back on the couch, feeling a bit uneasy about it, but knowing he had to be honest. But the more he tried, the less the words would come out. Finally, he sighed and picked up his phone, murmuring, "Can I just show you a few of them? I can't bring up the words... at least not properly." He pulled up a folder and flicked through images until he finally found the ones he was looking for.

The first one held an image of a man, fully clad in rather sexy faux leather, kneeling on the floor in front of another, who was completely naked. The one standing held the kneeling man's chin in his hand, between forefinger and thumb. The whole scene looked gentle, but somehow strong, intense, as though no questions were to be asked about it, just accepted. 

The second image was of a different couple, the one on bottom wearing a collar around his neck and leather cuffs on his hands, a chain leading between the two, his hands behind his back and the one taking him holding onto the chain as he fucked him from behind. The same sort of feeling exuded from the whole thing, as though it were somehow gently dominating, forceful but in a reserved sort of manner.

Die handed over the phone and murmured, "That one and the one to the right."

Kyo took Die's phone to peer at the pictures, immediately picking up on the theme between the two. He glanced at Die and then back to the photos before setting the phone down. "I am assuming that what you want is to be submissive to that extent?" 

He had to admit that even the idea of dominating Die in that manner turned him on quite a bit. He could almost easily exercise that kind of control and power and enjoy it immensely. Of course, he had no idea why Die was so bent out of shape over wanting something like, but not everyone accepted the desire to be subjugated very well.

Die squirmed around as Kyo went over the photos and then asked him the question he'd known would follow them. His cheeks flushed a bit and he sighed softly, nodding. "But I know that's not the position I'm supposed to be in, and I'm trying really hard to figure out why I want it that way... I promise I'll work it out, but I just... I'm trying to sort of get it out with you taking me, but like I said... it just... doesn't quite get what I want, and it's frustrating." He pushed his hand through his red hair and shook his head, gently tugging at it.

Kyo stared at Die and then crossed his arms. He was feeling some amount of frustration with his lover and his insistence that what he wanted was wrong. He sighed and held his hand up, shaking his head. "Stop. Just stop. What do you mean position and all that crap? The only position I'm worried about it whether we're doing it doggy, missionary or somewhere against a wall....Daisuke...I love you, but you've got to quit thinking about things like that." He licked his lips and sighed. "You work yourself up over nothing. I've told you, sex is sex, and we both have different things we want or want to try. For Gods' sake, I've pissed my jeans for you...I'm willing to do nearly anything you can throw at me...at least once."

Something about the way Kyo launched into everything forced Die's mind to at least attempt to deal with what he'd been nearly in denial about, and he found his anxiety fading fast, leaving him with the numbness that came from the pills. He fidgeted again and then breathed out a sigh, closing his eyes. "I mean I'm supposed to dominate you. You're the most accommodating lover in the world, but I can't ask you to give up the place you want to be in and change it all around like that." He gave Kyo a pleading look. "It's cruel. I know I can't do a good enough job of it to start with, that I'm honestly horrible at dominating you the way you need. So what on earth gives me the right to ask you to take the other side of it? The side I'm supposed to be on?"

Kyo peered at Die then sighed, scrubbing his hand over his face. "Die, baby...you've got it...incredibly wrong. When I asked you to dominate me...I meant sometimes. I did not mean all the time. Just as I have to assume you don't want to be my permanent sub..." He reached out and took Die's hands, squeezing them. "Besides, if it really comes down to it....then we'll outsource." He gave a slight quirk of his lips.

Die caught Kyo's meaning, and he almost managed a tiny smile. He looked more worn out than anything for the time being, though he was still somehow desperately horny and even bringing up the photos hadn't helped him at all in that respect.

With a soft sigh, he slid one of his hands on top of Kyo's own, lightly rubbing at it. "You're right; I don't want it all the time. I don't even know if I actually want it at all. I don't know how far or anything, and it's that part that scares me. I get it, in theory, but... attached to me, I don't understand it. If that makes any amount of sense in the least."

Kyo shifted so that he could wrap his arm around Die and hug him tightly. "It does...and we can experiment, see which aspects you like..."

Die breathed out a breath and shifted toward Kyo in some attempt to curl around him. "I'm sorry I've been a total jerk about this whole thing..." he murmured quietly.

Kyo shook his head and leaned over to kiss Die's cheek, lightly rubbing his arm. "I just wish you wouldn't get so worked up about things, baby. Talk to me. Always let me know what's on your mind."

Die nodded a little and then murmured, "Yeah, I need to work on it, I do." He pressed his face against Kyo's neck. "Will you take me? We'll... work on the other part later. I'd just like you to be a little forceful with me... rough about the whole thing?" He sounded a little bit afraid, but he wanted what he asked for at least.

Kyo nodded then smiled a little, unable to deny the fact that Die's words had his arousal spiking again. It really had been too long. "Here or on the bed?"

Die shifted a little and then murmured, "Don't ask me, please... just... do." He ducked his head slightly, not used to this end of things, but knowing if he didn't get part of it, he would go away just as on edge as before.

Kyo licked his lips and sat there for a moment, considering things. He idly rubbed Die's arm for a moment, then, without warning, moved his hand to grasp Die's hair, tugging his head back and kissing him hard.

Die's instant response was to whine and buck up toward Kyo's body. He shuddered slightly, his arousal starting to ramp up hard and fast, making more than a little bit obvious how much he wanted this sort of thing.

Kyo groaned lowly, reaching up to grasp Die's chin as he pushed his tongue into his mouth, his hold anything but gentle. He didn't know how much he could work in, he was so desperate just to have Die.

Something like relief spread through Die as Kyo took the control away from him, asserted himself and took on the more dominant role. His body went from all rigid lines to relaxed, the crease between his eyebrows that always represented his deep-seated concerns fading away as he kissed Kyo back, though much more gently than Kyo was going at him. Before even a few minutes had passed, Die was already achingly hard again and his demeanor had slackened off from the fearful man he'd been earlier to something more like his usual self.

Kyo abruptly pushed Die away from himself and stood up, unzipping his pants. He pushed them down just far enough to release his cock. He shifted more in front of Die then stood there, not saying a word, wondering if Die would take initiative and suck him, or if he was going to have to demand it.

Die nearly wanted to whine when Kyo backed away from him. But he went with it anyway, knowing this was a part of what he'd asked for. He took in the way his lover was looking at him, the expectancy in that gaze, and then the way his cock stood out rigidly from his body, and he found a whole new level of appreciation for Kyo in that moment. Even just the air he gave off was intense, more like the man he saw on stage than the man that usually greeted him at home, and somehow that sent a thrill through him. 

He pushed himself off the couch and knelt down in front of Kyo, his hands sliding over his thighs, feeling the muscles beneath the material. And then he leaned in, brushing his lips over Kyo's length before shooting him a look that clearly asked if this was what he was supposed to be doing.

Kyo grunted softly, his hand moving to slide into Die's hair, fingers tightening in the red locks. He gave a single nod of his head in response to the questioning look Die shot him, his hand tugging his face closer to his cock.

Die was careful as he slid his lips around Kyo's cock and slowly began to suck him off. He didn't display his usual over-eagerness, but he also was clearly not disinterested. He wanted what he was doing, but he was more reserved than usual, as though he were taking all his cues from Kyo.

Kyo leaned back, keeping his hand firmly tangled in Die's hair. He let his lover go at it at the same pace for several moments then finally gave his hair a good yank. "Faster."

The redhead nearly moaned around Kyo's cock as his hair was pulled so harshly. Immediately, he responded, going after Kyo more like he usually would, though he was nearly slobbering on himself, and he looked somehow a bit more glazed than usual, but definitely enjoying himself.

Kyo almost moaned, but he kept it to himself, just lightly pushing Die's head down. He shifted position and pushed his hips up, letting out the slightest sound but gave no other indication that he was pleased or displeased.

Die seemed to nearly redouble his efforts with Kyo's cock the moment that the other's hips pushed forward a bit. He started making all kinds of noises, moaning and whimpering as he gave him head, his fingertips pawing at Kyo's thigh gently.

The vocalist let Die carry on for a bit longer before finally jerking his head up and pushing him away as he stood. He stared at Die for a moment then physically hauled him up onto the couch, pushing him against the back. He yanked his pants down and swatted his ass for good measure before he slid his cock between Die's ass cheeks, unable to stop his moans then. He started humping against Die, one arm around his waist to hold him

Die gasped when Kyo actually exerted his physical strength, pulling him up onto the couch and plopping him down there. His eyes widened as he was basically manhandled into position and his pajama pants taken down. He let out a rough moan, basically clinging to the couch as Kyo started to thrust against his ass, his cock sliding between his ass cheeks, creating a pleasant sensation. "Oh god, Kyo," he moaned out, desperation starting to bubble up inside him.

Kyo smirked and slipped his hand around, splaying it over Die's lower abdomen, pressing lightly as he rutted against his backside. "I could thrust into your right now...take you while you scream...use you then leave you there with my cum dripping down your thighs..."

Die groaned as Kyo continued thrusting against him. The words made him shudder, his head bowing and something goaded him to breathe out, "Use me how you want to," before he could stop himself.

Kyo snorted and pulled back, grabbing handful of Die's ass and squeezing roughly. "Oh believe me...I will." He shifted and dug around between the cushions, finding the tube of lube he thought they'd left there. 

Uncapping it, he poured some onto his fingers then set it aside, moving to run the digits up and down Die's crack. As much as he wanted to skip the tedium of prep, he was not interested in harming his lover. With that in mind, he slid two fingers into Die's body, groaning lowly. "Always so tight for me..."

Die just clung to the couch, his head bowed and his body just exuding an air of complete submissiveness. There was none of the usual responsive, reciprocating Die, but a ton of this new version of him that simply let things happen, almost mindlessly existing as he waited on each thing to come to him. And in all honesty... he hadn't looked as calm as he did now in months.

Kyo took in Die's stature and attitude with the whole thing, finding that the more Die acted submissive, the more he wanted to utterly dominate him. He reached up with his other hand and pushed Die over the back of the couch, holding him there tightly as he started fucking him hard with his fingers.

Die's fingers tightened in the couch cushions for a few moments, and then he loosened up, groaning quietly as he rested his head on the couch, his eyelids falling closed as Kyo fucked him. It felt amazing, and he couldn't have been happier with the whole thing, his body humming with pleasure and relaxation.

Kyo added a third finger, twisting them around then going at Die again, harder than before. He dragged his nails down Die's back, leaving bright red marks in their wake. Finally, he grew tired of waiting and pulled his fingers out. After wiping them on a tissue and pouring a few drops of lube onto his cock, he positioned himself behind Die and started teasing his entrance with his cock. He pushed just the head in then pulled back only to do it again. When he decided Die had gotten used to that, he pushed all the way forward, sinking himself into the guitarist's body with a loud groan. "Oh…fuck yes!"

Die shuddered as Kyo pushed inside him, just the head of his cock teasing in and out a few dozen times. It felt amazing, and he nearly wanted to beg for it to just keep like that for a while, but he thought he'd ask for it later, when he wasn't supposed to be being quiet and undemanding. He rubbed his fingertips over the couch and then shifted his hips a little bit, something he couldn't quite help as Kyo pushed into his body. His own moan met Kyo's, a look of pure bliss on his face.

Kyo noticed Die shifted his hips and reached down to grasp them as he started to thrust into him. He wasn't sure how long he would last, it had been so long, but he couldn't help but go at fast speed, already panting with lust.

Die buried his face against the couch and moaned loudly, his body shuddering as he got what he'd been wanting for far too long. Simultaneously, he sort of relaxed and became desperate. His cock was so hard it nearly hurt, his balls tight and aching for his release. But the rest of his body was still so relaxed, it was damn near scary.

Kyo thrusted harder into Die, his arousal ramping up more and more. He slipped his hands up Die's sides, clawing at his ribs lightly then going to hold onto his shoulders. The way Die was so relaxed during this, that Kyo was almost worried, but when he moved one hand around Die's front, he found that his lover was rock hard. He pushed in and paused, just grinding his hips against Die as he started stroking his cock, leaning in to murmur against his ear. "You may cum when you need to..."

Die's reaction was nearly instantaneous, a low moan coming from his lips as he was stroked by his lover. He let out a quiet, "Thank you," his hips canting forward slightly, a slight shudder slipping through his body.

Kyo responded by starting to thrust again, his hand stroking Die's length in time with the snap of his hips.

Die's face crushed into the back of the couch for a moment, and then it was like something snapped inside him. For a few seconds, he strained, and then he let out a cry that actually had the cat panicking all the way in the kitchen. A few seconds later, he was painting the couch with all of his cum, a sigh of pleasure leaving his lips as he sort of deflated again.

Kyo could feel Die's inner walls rippling and tightening around him just as he was about to cum. He stilled for a second then slammed hard and fast into Die for a minute before pulling out and cumming all over his lower back, ass and thighs, a groan leaving his lips as he did. He sat there for a moment the grabbed a tissue and wiped the head of his dick off before tucking away. He swatted Die's ass then shifted to flop on the couch, letting out a satisfied sigh.

Die just remained where he was, grunting a little at the swat. He closed his eyes and concentrated on breathing and on pulling himself out of the place he'd gone to for the duration of their session. When he opened his eyes again, he found Kyo settled there and he moved finally, tugging up his pants without care of how he wasn't cleaned up, and settled himself astride Kyo's lap, sliding his arms around him and snuggling in like the most comfortable man in the entire universe. He was so relaxed it was incredible, nothing about him reading stressed at all.

Kyo smiled when Die came to him. He wrapped his arms around him and nuzzled his neck, placing light kisses here and there. He brushed his fingers through Die's hair, pushing it from his face. "You're beautiful."

Die's arms tightened for a moment around Kyo and then relaxed again, though he turned his head and nuzzled a bit against Kyo's neck. "I ask that when we do this... after... we do this part. I feel closer somehow... I'm not even sure that makes sense." Oddly, despite the words, he didn't sound uncertain or stressed out over not knowing like he usually did. Rather, he was utterly calm.

Kyo smiled and nodded, cupping Die's cheek and kissing him softly. "I was planning to anyway, Koi. It seems to be an integral part of it." He pressed his lips to Die's forehead then settled. "And yes, it makes sense...I feel the same."

"May we go to bed now?" Die asked quietly, already sounding like he was ready to fall off to sleep.

Kyo chuckled softly and nodded. "We may...but don't you wanna clean up first..?"

Die shook his head a little. "No, I don't." For once, he didn't seem at all embarrassed about something like this.

Kyo laughed softly and nodded, patting Die's thigh. "Then get up; I don't think I can carry you up the stairs, Baby."

"Mmm... but you did so well at tossing me on the couch," he murmured softly. But a moment later, he got up and then held out his hand, looking sleepy as all hell. "Mmm... come on, lover boy."

Kyo chuckled and stood up, taking Die's hand. "I know...I suppose I could piggy back you up there…" He grinned and headed for the stairs, pulling Die along.

As they went up the stairs, Die breathed out, "I liked you showing me how powerful you are... losing all the control... it was just like pure freedom. I didn't have to worry about anything. Not if I was doing things right or wrong, because you'd tell me no matter what, not about what would come next or wouldn't, because it wasn't for me to decide..." he trailed off, still looking somehow distant and dreamy.

Kyo glanced over at his lover and hummed in response. Once they'd reached the top of the stairs, he pulled Die into a tight hug. "I'm glad you enjoyed it. Having that sort of control can be freeing all by itself and knowing that you enjoyed it as much...is a relief, actually."

Die stepped into Kyo's embrace and tucked himself against him, feeling more protected than anything in that moment. "You enjoyed it, too, then? It's... okay?" The barest hint of uncertainty was there, but he was still far too relaxed to be freaking out about it.

Kyo nodded, running his hands up and down Die's back. "Yes, I enjoyed it a lot. It's okay." He smiled then stood on tiptoe to kiss Die softly before grabbing his hand and tugging him the rest of the way into their bedroom. Once there, he flopped onto the bed and unceremoniously pulled Die down with him, immediately wrapping him in another embrace.

Die allowed himself to fall onto the bed beside the other, rolling into his arms. He stuffed his face against Kyo's neck, nuzzling in just under his ear and pressing his lips against the other's skin there. "Thank you... thank you so much. And I'm so sorry I didn't actually just come out and say it. Sometimes... I'm an idiot," he chuckled just after, nuzzling in again.

Kyo allowed himself to laugh and then buried his face against Die's hair. He stroked his back for a few moments before shrugging one shoulder. "It's okay, baby. Sometimes it can be hard to reconcile our wants with ourselves and even more so to tell someone else..."

"I feel so much better right now than I have in quite a while," Die murmured softly, shifting around to get the covers up over them and get into a comfortable position that was still mostly on Kyo, but not crushing him so they could fall asleep against one another if they wanted to.

Kyo shifted around a bit to assist with the covers then settled, keeping Die right where he was. "I can tell; even the lines of your face have relaxed, and you're like jelly." He nuzzled against Die, smiling widely.

"Thank you... thank you so much, baby."

"Any time, my love...any time."

Die stifled a yawn and then sniffed a bit, closing his eyes and relaxing down against the other. "Once a month?" he asked quietly.

Kyo considered it for a moment then nodded. "That or whenever you'd like...you can send me a text or something if we're working...and I'll know..."

A small smile slid across Die's face and he nodded a little, quieting down until he was almost asleep before he whispered out, "Baby... promise me you'll tell me when you want it the other way?"

Kyo stroked a hand through Die's hair, letting out a yawn. "Of course..." He laced his fingers with Die's then murmured, "Goodnight Koi, I love you."

"I love you, too," Die murmured softly, settling down again and slowly drifting off.


	66. Chapter 66

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

It had been a long day for Die, as he'd first gone to his therapist for a check-in about his anxiety pills and how he was handling things and then straight from there to an interview with GiGs. The interview and photoshoot had been fun, but had taken way more time than they were supposed to, and by the time he got himself home, he knew Kyo had probably been waiting on him for a while, but his phone had died somewhere between the shoot location and the office so he could catch the train to come back home. 

Coming inside, he tossed down his bag, hung up his jacket, and shucked his boots. It was still fucking cold outside as far as he was concerned, and while that wasn't horrible, he still didn't like being cold in the least. He made his way in and glanced around, finding Kyo on the couch and starting toward him with a small smile. "Hey, baby. Shoot ran behind."

Kyo had been planning his evening pretty much all day. He'd had a few things to tend to in the afternoon but had arrived home what he was thought was an hour before Die was supposed to be there. However, Die did not arrive when he was supposed to, and after getting Die's voicemail for the 10th time, Kyo was almost ready to just give it up entirely. 

Then Die was waltzing in like nothing had happened, an excuse on his lips. Kyo snorted and crossed his arms. "You didn't answer your phone."

Die fished it out of his pocket and held it up, pressing buttons to show him he was out of power. "This old excuse for a phone is a joke while I'm waiting on the new one to come in." He took a look at Kyo's face and then tilted his head a little. "Are you okay? Did something happen?"

Kyo scooted to the edge of his seat and glared at Die's phone for a moment before look at its owner. He clucked his tongue and raised a finger to silence the other. "Shut up. Come here." He pointed his finger to the spot directly in front of him.

Die arched an eyebrow at the other and opened his mouth to protest. But a moment later, he got a look of understanding on his face and moved quietly toward Kyo. He set the phone on the table and quickly connected the charger before settling down on his knees at Kyo's feet, easing himself back so that his butt lightly touched his feet, his hands in his lap, and curiosity reflected on his face.

The way Die immediately positioned himself on his knees sent a wave of arousal through Kyo. His lover learned fast, and that was a good thing. He licked his lips and studied Die for a moment before cupping his chin and leaning in to kiss him with a deceivingly soft touch, just lightly sliding his lips over Die's then gently pushing his tongue into his mouth.

Die craned up into the touch, moaning quietly as he kissed Kyo back, enjoying the moment immensely. Something about the gentleness of the whole thing was exciting, though he had a feeling it wasn't going to last very long.

Kyo took his time with the kiss then abruptly pushed Die back. "Undress for me."

Pulling back, Die licked his lips and then slowly stood up, pulling his cardigan off and tossing it aside. Next went the patterned top, falling to the floor to the left of his feet. Then he grabbed his belt, slowly opening it and then unbuttoning the four buttons on his pants, easing them down his hips, thighs, and then down and off his legs along with his socks. And, finally, his fingertips slid under the band of his underwear, easing them down his legs as well and stepping out of them. He knelt back down after he was naked and carefully took off the few bracelets he was wearing along with his rings and placed them on the coffee table in the small glass bowl. With that done, he turned back to peer at Kyo, completely wordless.

Kyo sat back and watched Die undress himself, reaching down to grope at his growing erection. He gave a soft sound of approval then reached out, stroking his fingers through his hair. "Do not make a sound until I give you permission to do so or you feel the need to use our safe word. Verbally tell me that you understand."

"I understand," Die responded quietly, already looking for all the world like the most submissive person on the entire planet.

Kyo nodded, moving his hand down to pat Die's cheek for a moment before pulling his hand away. "Good. Now, do you have to piss?"

Die debated it for a moment and then tilted his head a little before moving one hand to sort of tilt it in the air and shrug.

Kyo hummed then shifted some more before settling. "Come here and stroke me or suck me until I'm fully hard."

Moving forward, Die settled down closer to him and then reached up to take his cock in hand, slowly starting to stroke him, enjoying the way his lover's dick grew in his hand as he pleasured him. He wanted to moan out his pleasure, but he assumed that was part of what Kyo meant about not making a sound. Instead, he bit his lower lip and looked up at Kyo with sincere pleasure in his eyes.

Kyo let out a quiet moan as Die began stroking him, his hips canting upward into the touch. He'd been worked up pretty much all day as he'd planned what he would do to Die this evening. The look on his lover's face told him all he needed to know and as he dropped his head back, he breathed out, "Good, just like that..."

Die kept going, occasionally playing with the head of the other's dick or sliding his fingertips over the head of his prick. He knew Kyo was as hard as he was going to get with the exception of right before cumming, but he also hadn't been told to stop and Kyo's last comment seemed like he wanted him to continue... and thus, he did.

Kyo allowed Die to carry on for quite some time until he felt himself nearing orgasm. With a moan, he reached down and grabbed Die's wrist, stopping his actions. "Enough. Stand up, turn around and put your hands behind your back."

Surprise filtered over Die's face, but he didn't protest in the least. He stood up and then pulled himself away from Kyo, turning his back on him and slowly slid his arms behind his back, loosely holding one wrist in his other hand, almost cradling it there.

Kyo pulled out a silk scarf from his pocket and wound it in a figure 8 around Die's wrists, loosely binding them together. He tied it off then swatted Die's ass. "Mm, very nice. Go up to the bedroom and kneel on the bed; I'll be up in a minute."

Arousal spiraled through Die as the other bound his wrists, only narrowly avoiding spilling out a sound when Kyo swatted his ass end. He bit his lip a little bit and then made his way toward the stairs. He managed them really well, getting up to the bedroom and attempting to crawl onto the bed without his arms, huffing a bit as he tried not to laugh about the fact that he was having obvious issues with this.

After a bit, he managed to get only part way on the bed, finally just dealing with his feet hanging off the edge, sort of tottering there, hoping Kyo would be fast.

Kyo waited until he heard Die get to the top of the stairs. He followed at leisurely pace, finally entering the bedroom to see the position his lover was in. He almost laughed but kept it himself, instead going around the bed until he could see Die's face. "That isn't kneeling. Can you really not follow such easy instructions, Daisuke?"

Die gave him a little sad look, his lips pursed a bit because he knew he wasn't supposed to answer, but he hadn't been able to get on the bed well enough with his wrists tied. Instead, he sort of flapped his arms a bit and looked down at the bed, then back up at Kyo with a little hopeless look.

Kyo looked at Die and did laugh then, reaching out to pet his hair. "You're not supposed to make me feel sorry for you..." He shook his head and moved back around, lifting Die's legs all the way onto the bed for him. 

Once he was done, he reached into their nightstand and pulled out a sizeable butt plug and lubed it up. Without much warning, he began entering it into Die's body, wiggling and twisting it a bit until it popped it. Tapping the end of it, he grinned. "This is to loosen you up for me." 

Die bit back a whine as the plug was taken and inserted into his ass without any other prep. He was lucky they'd had sex the night before, so he wasn't entirely un-used to having something in him. He pursed his lips to hold back the grunt that wanted out and then nodded a little to show he understood.

Kyo moved back to where Die could see him then grabbed a towel he'd left lying there. After spreading it out on the floor, he pushed his pants down out of the way and started pissing on it, his eyes on Die's face as he did.

Die’s gaze flicked over to Kyo again when the other came back into his view. He watched the towel go down, and he gave it a curious look. An instant later, Kyo had moved his pants and was pissing on it. It was all he could do to stop any sounds from coming out besides the sound of his breath hitching slightly, his cock twitching slightly as he stared at the other and what he was doing, arousal sweeping through him quickly, making his ass clench around the plug.

Kyo smirked as he noted the arousal washing over his lover. He pushed the last few spurts of his piss out with a loud moan, immediately starting to jack off afterward, bringing himself back to full hardness. 

He stood there for a moment, running his finger over the head of his cock, pulling it away and watching the string of precum go with it. 

He finally moved again, going to settle on the bed behind Die, rubbing his hand over his ass for a moment before taking the plug and pulling it out with a pop. He contemplated what he wanted to do next and reached into the drawer again, pulling out one of their larger vibrators. Turning it on low, he started running it over Die's sac and up the length of his cock.

Die's hips sort of bucked when Kyo started playing with him, his teeth sinking into his lower lip as he did his best not to make any sounds at all. But the fact that they'd not used the toys in so long and now here Kyo was using so many of them, it was hard for him not to want to make all kinds of sounds, and even more difficult for him not to squirm around in near-desperation.

When Kyo got the vibe to the head of Die's dick, he circled around it, teasing him. Finally, he pulled it away and patted Die's hip. "I want you to moan for me now, as loud and desperate as you want." With that, he turned the vibration up a notch and ran it down Die's cock again before finally pushing it into his body, groaning softly.

Relief slid through Die at the permission to allow him to go ahead and make noise. His hips jerked a bit, and he shuddered, letting out a moan as the vibe moved down his dick again. After a few moments, the vibrator pushed up into his ass, and he nearly fell over for a moment from the entire feeling of it all, but he caught himself.

Kyo pushed the vibe in and out slow a few times before starting to fuck the redhead hard with it. "How does it feel, Die? To be fucked like this?"

Die wanted to answer Kyo, to tell him it felt like the most amazing thing in the entire world and like he was going to cum so hard he'd be left deaf and blind from it. But instead, he moaned and cried out as though he were nearly overacting a scene in a porno... only, he was honestly feeling that aroused already, something about having no control over the situation leaving him needy for even more, his body on fire with the desperate need of it. Even his breathing was broken, little huffs and pants, punctuated by the moans he gave and the quivers of his body as Kyo went after him.

Kyo smirked at the response he got, pushing the toy in even deeper. He shifted and twisted his wrist, moving the toy in a different angle, searching for Die's sweet spot. "You're so gorgeous like this....I bet you're ready to paint the bed with your cum...but...don't you dare...not until I say you can."

Die loosed a whine at that, but he knew he'd do his best not to violate Kyo's wishes. As long as Kyo didn't push him to it, then he'd be fine, knowing well enough how to hold himself off of orgasm from some denial play he'd had with a girlfriend years ago.

He cast those memories aside, focusing on what Kyo was doing to him now, adoring the fact that he was once again presented with the man he saw grace the stage so often over the years, right alongside the man who had come into his life in such a wonderful manner in the past while.

Kyo finally found that spot he was looking for, and Die's hips jerked involuntarily, his eyes rolling back and his mouth falling open in a nearly silent scream as he tilted his head back, his dick flexing up hard for a moment before he offered a small grunt.

Kyo groaned when he hit Die's prostate, shuddering with arousal at the way Die reacted. He pushed the toy over it a few more times then finally relented, pulling the toy out of Die's body. He turned it off and set it aside then reached to untie Die's wrists.

He grabbed up the lube and slicked up his cock then moved to position himself against the headboard. "C'mere, Die, and ride my cock."

Die felt a surge of sadness wash over him when Kyo untied his wrists, thinking that the release from the bonds meant Kyo was done with what he'd been doing. But then he was telling him to come and ride him, and his tone was still the same. He felt relief settle back over him, the sense of calmness he held when Kyo took this position over him coming back. 

Moving off the bed, he took a moment to sort of regain his legs before he climbed back onto the bed and straddled Kyo's lap. He reached down and steadied the other's cock, slowly sinking down onto his length and then taking hold of the headboard for leverage as he began to move, pleasure shooting straight through him in an instant, his cock harder than it had been all night, and he rode the other.

Kyo leaned back and made himself comfortable as Die began to ride him. At first, he showed now outward expression of pleasure, simply sitting there as Die bounced on his dick. Eventually though, he moved his hands to grasp Die's hips and start thrusting up into him, a moan ripping free as he did. It felt too damn good for him to remain stoic. "Fuck, yes...that's a good little pet...you like riding my cock, don't you?" He swatted Die's ass, glancing up at him. "Answer me."

At first Die just nodded, but when he was spanked and then told to answer, he nearly cried out a desperate sounding, "Yes!" in reply. Moans and whines still poured from him as he moved with Kyo, horny as all get-out, really loving being the one riding Kyo like this. It was a powerful position and one they didn't use nearly often enough in his opinion, but it just made him more aroused when they did.

Kyo wasn't satisfied with Die's answer and smacked his ass again, harder. "Yes, what?" He snapped his hips up particularly hard, driving his cock deep into Die.

Die choked on his words when Kyo shoved up into him, nearly losing it and having to bear down just to stop it, a look of near pain on his face as he did it. After a few seconds, he let up and gasped out, "Yes, I love riding you... it feels so... ah... so good," he panted out.

Kyo shuddered with the way Die was bearing down. He smirked and grabbed his hips, shifting them forward so that Die landed on his back and now Kyo was on top. "I'm going to fucking fill you with my cum," he grunted out as he started pounding into Die in their new position. 

It wasn't but another moment before he was growling out as he stilled and started cumming, his cock twitching with the effort of it. "O-oh…fu--ck!"

Die wanted to scream with frustration at still not being told he could cum. But the feeling of Kyo pounding into him was a welcome one, and despite his frustration, he found himself melting into it, almost involuntarily. He bit his lip as he felt Kyo's cock start to throb with his release, squeezing down on him to make it just that much better, squirming a little.

Kyo thrust into Die a couple of more times then pulled out, holding onto his lover knee as he panted. "Fuck you feel so damn good." 

He sat there for a few moments then looked at Die, licking his lips. "You're so hard, it looks painful...do you want to cum, Die?"

Die peered up at Kyo, a desperate sort of look on his face as he nodded adamantly in response to the question.

Kyo chuckled softly, reaching down to grasp Die's cock, pulling it up then releasing it, watching it snap back against his body. "Beg me."

Immediately, Die was whimpering, his hands coming up in front of him to clasp as he gave his most convincingly pleading look, not sure if he was supposed to talk or not.

Kyo licked his lips then held up his hand. "I meant verbally...verbally beg me..."

Within a few seconds, pleas were falling from Die's lips. "Please, I need to cum so bad. I almost did, but I held on for you... please..." after a moment of hesitation, he breathed out, "Master?" his voice almost uncertain.

Kyo's dick twitched at the pleas coming from Die's mouth, and then he called him Master, and that was about enough to undo him. He growled and leaned down, licking over the head of Die's cock. "You may cum..." With that, he took Die into his mouth and started bobbing his head over his rigid length, not taking his time with it in the least.

Die cried out loudly as Kyo told him he could cum and then started to suck his dick. He arched up off the bed, trembling and then started to cum, his fist smacking the bed as it started, everything about him utterly losing it in that moment.

Kyo groaned, having to grasp Die's hip to keep him from choking him on his cock. He swallowed everything his lover had to offer then sat up, licking his lips, looking very satisfied. He stroked his hands over Die's thigh, peering at him, taking in in the moment.

Die lay there after his orgasm, trembling slightly, but looking far more relaxed. When his gaze traveled up to Kyo's face, he was obviously still fully in his role, a certain half-lost look in his eyes gave him away.

Kyo licked his lips then leaned over Die to kiss him deeply, sharing what was left of his cum in his mouth. When he lifted his head, all traces of his dominate side were gone, and he was once again the Kyo that Die came home to every night instead. He stroked Die's cheek and smiled. "You okay?"

Die looked almost reluctant to let go of that side of himself when Kyo pulled back. But he closed his eyes and once he opened them again, he was a bit more with it, though obviously still struggling to come out of it. "Yeah..." he arched off the bed a little and then groaned quietly.

Kyo noted Die's reluctance and cocked his head, stroking his cheek again. "Die...if something isn't... complete for you...I need to know..."

The guitarist shifted around uneasily for a few moments, and then breathed out a quiet, "I need more." Silence for a second and finally, "I need to feel used." His embarrassment was clear, but at least he'd spoken what he needed to.

Kyo licked his lips and nodded. "Stay there, I'll be back." He got up and made his way out of the room. He headed downstairs and into the kitchen, getting a bottle of water and taking his time sipping, giving them both time to settle and go back into their roles. 

He had wondered how far to take things, and now he had some idea as of to what Die needed and wanted.

Die lay there, feeling uneasy with Kyo having left the room. Worry settled over him, and he found himself wanting to call out to the other to come back, but unable to force himself to vocalize the want, unsure if this was a part of it or not. Rolling onto his side, he curled up and tugged one of the pillows down to cling to.

Kyo came back in time to see Die clinging to the pillow. Instantly, he regretted leaving the room and found himself standing in the doorway, feeling a bit lost. He wanted to go and reassure his lover but wasn't sure if that would blow the entire game or what. Sighing softly, he cleared his throat to get Die's attention.

Die sort of uncurled himself once he heard Kyo come back, pushing the pillow away and moving to peer at his lover, quietly offering, "Don't leave me..." before he closed his eyes and then opened them again, much more into his role when he opened them again.

Kyo nodded once then did the same as Die, closing his eyes and slipping into his role once more. "Come over here and make me hard again."

Die rolled off the bed, padding over to his lover and settling down on his knees as he had before. He still opted for his hand, this time more because Kyo's cock had already been in his ass, and he wasn't a big fan of sucking dick after it'd been there. He used his other hand to caress his balls, every once in a while sliding a finger back to gently rub around his taint and over his entrance.

Kyo let out a soft moan as Die began stroking him. He threaded his fingers through the other's hair, giving it a sharp tug then just resting his hand there. "Mmm, yeah, finger my asshole…"

This... Die could do. He pulled his finger back and spit on it before he moved to push it behind Kyo's balls again, nearly instantly finding his entrance and slowly fucking his finger in and out of him, staring up at him with stark arousal in his eyes as he did it.

The moment Die's finger slid into him, he groaned, his cock twitching with arousal. "Mm, just like that, pet..." He gazed down at Die, mirroring his lover's desire in his own eyes.

Die shifted enough to start actively thrusting his finger in and out of Kyo's tight hole, a little moan feeing itself from him as he performed the action on his lover.

Kyo's hips canting up as Die thrusted his finger into him. After a few minutes, he tightened his hand in Die's hair. "Stop."

Die stopped when he was told to, no questions asked, just settling there and waiting, gnawing lightly at his lower lip.

Kyo stepped back then around his lover, moving over to the bed. He settled down on it and crooked his finger at Die. "Over here. Now."

Die picked himself up off the floor and made his way over, standing before Kyo, his hands at his sides and his head bowed, waiting on instruction.

Kyo examined Die then stood once more. He circled behind Die then grabbed his arm and roughly turned him around so that his back was to the bed. He pushed him down onto it then was on top of him, grasping his hips and moving him into the position he wanted. He slid his hands between Die's legs and gripped his thighs roughly, surely leaving bruises. 

Pushing the limbs apart, he leaned forward and presented his fingers to Die's mouth. "Suck 'em."

Die's rush of arousal was instantly obvious, his cock starting to stiffen between his legs as he was manhandled, obviously getting much more of what he'd been looking for this time. His cheeks and neck started to flush ever so slightly, and the moment Kyo told him to suck his fingers, he opened his mouth for the digits, waiting on his mouth to be invaded by them.

Kyo took in Die's reactions, mentally making notes as he pushed his digits between the guitarist's lips. "Suck them like you're sucking my dick."

Die's hands got involved quickly, holding onto Kyo's hand with a certain tender caring as he began to bob his head over the other's fingers, licking and sucking at the slim digits, sometimes pulling up to swirl his tongue around the tips and then back down toward his knuckles.

Kyo groaned at the way Die imitated with his fingers, the actions sending hot lust straight to his dick. When he couldn't stand it, he pulled his hand away and used his other to push Die's up above his head. He leaned down and licked his lover's lips, nipping the bottom one harshly before slipping his hand between his legs and thrusting his fingers into him.

Die cried out as the fingers slid into his body, his hips arching up off the bed and his thighs trembling slightly. He wanted this, and he wanted it bad.

Kyo held Die's hand above his head as he fingered him, not being gentle with it. He was quick to add a third finger, aided by his own cum still in Die's ass. "Piss on yourself," he commanded, not relenting with his thrusting.

At the command, Die sort of half gaped at Kyo for a moment, knowing they were on the bed and that he couldn't get the mattress below wet. He calculated it in his head and then sort of pushed his hips up for a moment, his dick twitching as he strained slightly. After a few moments, piss spurted out from the tip, raining down over his abdomen and sliding off and over his sides, down onto the bed below.

Kyo smirked when Die obeyed him, curling his fingers and rubbing right against his prostate as he pissed. "You're pissing the bed....it's gonna be soaked."

The touch against his prostate had him squirming and crying out under Kyo, flailing around nearly in desperation as he paused in his actions, knowing if he did more it would undoubtedly soak through the comforter and the sheets.

Kyo, having planned for this, reached up and sharply slapped Die's thigh. "Didn't tell you to stop..."

Die let out a low whine, shuddering a bit and then hissing out, "No," before he laid back and accepted his fate... and the fate of the bed as well, and started to simply empty his bladder, a small puddle forming under him.

Kyo licked his lips, slapping Die's other thigh for the "no," then pressed harder against his prostate as he reached to grasp Die's cock, stroking him even as he pissed.

It didn't take all that long before Die was finished, not having had an entirely full bladder to start with. He strained up into the touch, moaning quietly, his hands lightly tugging against the hold.

When Die finished pissing, Kyo pulled back entirely, wiping his hand clean on some tissues. He looked his lover and the mess over then smirked. "Did you enjoy that Die? Pissing the bed?"

Die squirmed a bit more and then stilled, nodding and breathing out a quiet, "Yes."

Kyo licked his lips. "Good." He shifted to the side and tugged Die with him, out of the puddle then pushed him over onto his stomach. Grasping his hips, he pulled his ass up in the air and spread his cheeks, groaning softly as some cum dribbled out. Moving Die around a bit more, he finally grasped his cock and steadied it before pushing into Die's body with a moan.

As he was manhandled around, Die found himself sinking into the pleasure of it all quiet easily. By the time Kyo's dick was sliding into his body, Die was nearly in a daze again, as he had been last time, the hard lines of his body slackening and his tension floating away.

The way Die became putty in his hands told him all he needed to know about what was needed during these sessions. He groaned and hunched over Die as he started thrusting into him roughly, his hand going to grasp Die's hip hard.

A small sound let Die's lips at the way he was handled, his fingertips kneading at the covers in front of him before he relaxed into it again. He was still hard, achingly so, the tip of his dick ruddy with his desire. But he made no move to get to it, seeming content to simply remain there, Kyo fucking him hard from behind.

Kyo shifted back and grabbed both of Die's hips, pulling him back onto his cock hard enough to bruise his ass. He moaned out a wild sound, his dominate demeanor falling apart as he gave into utter pleasure.

Something snapped inside of Die the moment Kyo let out his moan, and in the next moment, Die was losing it. His cum splattered across the bedsheets under him, his ass clenching around Kyo's cock as he came, his own moans falling from his lips as he let himself go.

Kyo stuttered out a half-moan, half-cry of pleasure as Die started cumming around him. He let loose everything he had then, pounding into Die until he was cumming, everything ounce of reserve left in him gone as he screamed out in pure pleasure, nearly sounding as though he were on stage.

Die pushed back against Kyo as he came, moaning quietly as the vocalist filled him up for the second time tonight.

When Kyo finished cumming, he sagged against Die, practically draping himself over his back as tremors went through him. He was utterly unable to move right then, every bone in his body liquefied and useless.

Die slid down against the bed, mindless of the puddle of cum he was lying in. He sort of rubbed around on the bed in a way that was nearly reminiscent of someone completely strung out on something, making tiny noises as he moved ever so slightly.

It took Kyo several long moments before he was able to move, easing out of Die then collapsing next to him. He wrapped his arm around Die's torso and pulled him close, tucking his head against his shoulder with a soft groan.

Die crawled nearly over Kyo, draping himself against the vocalist and nuzzling into him, rubbing his cheek against Kyo's shoulder with a quiet whine.

Kyo grunted and wrapped both arms around Die, cradling the guitarist to him tightly. He pressed a kiss to his lover's forehead, closing his eyes as he came down off it himself.

After a few moments, Die murmured out a quiet, "Thank you..." and then pressed his lips against Kyo's shoulder. "Should... I tell you what I liked?"

Kyo shifted and cupped Die's cheek, kissing him softly. "If you want to, love."

Die returned the kiss and then nodded a little, burrowing himself against Kyo again and then quietly talking, his voice muffled, "I like being manhandled... tossed around and moved." He paused to sniff a bit and then continued, "Taking it really hard, too... and... like when you made me suck your fingers... you pissing in front of me out of nowhere, and when you were really forceful with me." He paused for a second and then breathed out a quiet request, "I like you pulling my hair... and the idea of servicing you." He pulled himself back to actually earnestly look at Kyo. "I feel like there's another part of you when we do this, and I like that a lot."

Kyo listened to Die and nodded, filing all of it away for future use. He smiled a little and brushed his fingers through Die's hair. "I'm glad I'm doing something right...I'm not hurting you too much am I?"

Die paused for a moment at that and then burrowed his face against Kyo's neck to issue a soft, "Need... more."

Kyo hummed and nodded, stroking his hand down Die's side. "What about tying you up...did you like that? Would you want more?"

"Either way... if you like it, then I'm good with it, but it's not necessary," Die offered.

Kyo licked his lips and nodded again. "I liked it. I'd like to delve further into it, but I didn't want to go too far without having discussed it...hence the soft scarf instead."

Die nodded, closing his eyes and resting on Kyo's arm. "I'm more than willing to let you take it that way if you'd like." After all, it wasn't just about him, nothing in a relationship was only about one party, and he definitely understood what it took out of someone to be in Kyo's current position.

"Okay, good...I'll explore that sometime then." He yawned widely, wrapping his arm more securely around Die, rubbing his cheek against his hair. "Anything else?"

Die breathed out a quiet laugh and then, "The poor mattress..."

Kyo chuckled and shifted enough to yank back the covers, revealing a pad and a couple of towels. "I was prepared..."

Die stared down at what Kyo had revealed and then smirked, leaning back down again and murmuring, "You're amazing, you know that?"

Kyo grinned at that and shrugged, tugging Die close again. "I try...especially when it comes to you."

"I love you, baby."

"I love you, too, darling."


	67. Chapter 67

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Die stood in front of the bathroom mirror at the office, his face lined with worry and near desperation. He was sincerely done with today. Three meetings, one near yelling match with some idiot in upper management, and a photo approval later, and he was on the verge of a full-blown anxiety attack again. For a while, it had been enough that Kyo had calmed him down the way he had. A full three weeks later, and this was the first time that he was at this point. A wonderful track record if he were to tell the truth, given how bad off he'd been as of late. 

With a sigh, he pulled out the small pill bottle he kept attached to his keys, unscrewing the lid and dumping the mass of tiny pills into the palm of his hand. Rooting around, he pulled out a tiny blue pill and popped it into his mouth, ditching the rest back into his vial and screwing it back to his keychain. A palmful of water from the tap later, and he swallowed, glancing at himself in the mirror one more time.

Splashing his face with water, he leaned up and blindly grabbed for a paper towel, mopping up his face and then his hands, taking an unsteady breath and exiting the bathroom, making his way back to their meeting room.

Kyo sat in the meeting room Die had just vacated, looking surly and ready to flip the table on the entire thing. Management was pissing them all off, and even Shinya looked ready to blow up. He was about to get up and go find Die when the other returned so he simply offered him what he hoped was a sympathetic look though it felt more like a grimace.

Die's gaze flicked over to Kyo, and he gave a little nod to him, trying to let him know he had taken his pill and he'd be fine eventually. Settling back down, Die crossed his arms over his chest and then pursed his lips as Kaoru tossed a folder on the table and made the most "I am so done" look Die had ever seen. A second later, the random people from upper management dug right back in again, as if Die had never left at all.

Kyo nodded back at Die in understanding then sat back, scrubbing his hands over his face. This was the shittiest meeting they'd had in a long time, and he was just ready to go home. When management started yapping again, he gave up and started doodling on his notebook, starting to tune them out before he stabbed them all...if Kaoru didn't first.

Die's eyes flicked between Kaoru and these other people, a horrified sort of look on his face about what the hell was going on with the lot of them. Kaoru looked ready to start screaming, and Die was honest to god exasperated at the whole lot of them.

The minutes ticked by, Toshiya finally starting to type on his phone rather than converse, and Shinya just sat there, looking a bit glazed, like he'd tuned the world out.

Kyo watched the whole thing play then finally huffed. "You know what? You people clearly have no idea what we're looking for...So, until you get your heads out of your asses, I'm done." He flipped their documents back towards them and stood up, stalking from the room.

It seemed like a dick move, but he knew they'd end the meeting right then and there, and it wouldn't end up with Kaoru boiling over like he was so close to doing. 

He made his way out to the car and settled against it, waiting on Die to join him.

Die watched Kyo toss the documents toward the management and then heard the words pour out of his mouth. He arched his eyebrows and then crossed his arms over his chest, staring around at everyone in the room as his lover stalked off. Some part of him was faintly worried that his pill was not working. Usually by now he was already feeling the aching calm settling in, but so far... nothing at all was happening, and that pushed him one step closer to panic.

Kyo certainly wasn't wrong about his move though, because within five minutes, the meeting was called, and Die made sure Kaoru was out the door in front of him, away from the people he clearly wanted to strangle. 

He went and grabbed his and Kyo's stuff , and then made his way out to the car, his hands shaking by the time he got there. He unlocked the car and then jammed his stuff in the back, hesitating for a second and then muttering, "Your license still valid?"

Kyo looked up when he saw Die then frowned, seeing the shaking in his hands. He nodded and shifted around to the driver's side, slipping in and settling. "Uhm, I thought you took one of your pills...?"

"I did," Die returned quietly, giving Kyo the keys and then walking around the car, sliding into his seat with a sigh. He fished out his water bottle from the center cup holder and took a quick drink. He gave it a few seconds and then put it down, gesturing for his keys for a moment. "Need that back again. I'll just... take another one." After all, he had a few in there, he wasn't an idiot.

Kyo hummed softly then handed over the keys again. "Alright..." He waited, grabbing up his own water and sipping from it. "That was some bullshit they were trying to pull. I hope Kaoru sorts it out and tells them to fuck off."

"I pushed Kaoru out the door in front of me. I have no idea what the ever living fuck their problem is, but he was ready to slit throats. No way I was leaving him with the vultures, or we wouldn't have a band by tomorrow... or maybe not a label." He sighed, unscrewing the little pill bottle again and dumping it out into his palm once more. Again, he grabbed a little blue pill and popped it into his mouth, putting the cap back on and handing the keys back. A swig of water and he leaned back against the seat, sighing in frustration.

Kyo grunted and rubbed his forehead. "Good thing; hope Toshiya takes care of that one...Jesus." He took the keys back and started the car, pulling out of the parking lot and heading towards home, very glad to get away from work.

They headed down the road, Die gazing out the window as the various landmarks passed them by at varying speeds. As the minutes ticked by two things started to happen. One, he felt his emotions start to ease, the tension fade as his anti-anxiety meds kicked in. And, two, his cock started to become achingly hard in his pants. 

For the life of him, he couldn't figure out where that was coming from. He wasn't even 'in the mood', and it didn't seem like a random boner. There was absolutely nothing to set him off, and the feel of it was just all wrong. But by the time they were even five minutes into the ride, he was rock hard and had to adjust his pants in order to not be in the most amount of pain he'd been in in quite a while.

Kyo drove in relative silence, focusing on getting them home. He pulled up to the last stop light before their turn and glanced over at Die, noticing his adjustment and the reason for said action. His eyebrows shot up in surprise, and he cleared his throat. 

"And what have you been thinking about?" he questioned, wondering how on earth Die could accomplish a boner after all of that stress.

A sigh spilled from Die's mouth, and he shook his head a little. "Nothing! I have no fucking idea why this," he gestured at his dick, "is happening."

Kyo blinked then shook his head, taking his turn and heading up their street. "Okay...has that ever happened before...like that?"

"Not... like this. Like," Die huffed out a quiet laugh, "random boners, yeah, but... fuck. This just sort of came out of nowhere." He took note of the neighbor's yard having a lovely snowman built on the driveway. He smirked a bit and then refocused on Kyo.

Kyo huffed a little, easing the car into their driveway, minding the snow. "I know random boners and stuff...I meant after you have a panic attack or take your pills." Putting the car in park, he pulled the keys out and handed them back to Die before getting out.

"Hell no," Die breathed out. "Usually it makes me not even want sex unless I was super horny before. And even then, it's very... calm? Different... I don't know."

Kyo looked confused and shrugged a little, reaching into the back to get his bag. "Weird...." He didn't know what to think of Die's random boner, but he was anxious to get inside where it warm. He moved over to the door and unlocked it with his own key, stepping into the entry and removing his coat and boots with a sigh.

Die followed after him, grabbing his shit and then locking up the car. Once he was inside, he dropped his stuff and just plodded off toward the stairs. "Babydoll? Can you make something real quick to eat, and I'll draw us a bath?"

Kyo nodded and wandered into the kitchen, opening the fridge to poke around. He finally decided on simple sandwich wraps, pulling lettuce, onion, tomatoes and left over chicken from the fridge as well as mayo and mustard. He put them together, leaving the mayo off Die's then settled them on plates, taking them over to their bar to eat.

Die made his way upstairs while Kyo was making something for them to eat. He cleaned out the tub and set the water to dripping in the faucet so he could warm it and the pipes up, making sure the cats were out of the room. With the towels set out and the chosen oil by the bath, he set up incense and a candle with a lighter. 

Making his way back downstairs, he came to the bar and reached for the chicken wrap Kyo didn't currently have his hands on. "Thanks, darling."

Kyo was halfway through his wrap and simply nodded at Die's words of thanks, reaching over to rub his leg. He swallowed and gestured toward it. "I hope it's okay; we didn't have any ranch or cucumbers or...anything really. Looks like we need to go to the market soon."

"It's fine... just wanted something. I skipped lunch... not on purpose, but it happened." He winced a bit and stuffed another bite of food into his mouth. At least, he was telling the truth.

Kyo sniffed and squeezed Die's leg tightly. "I know; I was only able to get a few minutes myself and managed vending machine ramen." He finished off his wrap then wiped his mouth on a napkin before leaning over to kiss Die's cheek.

Die accepted the kiss and then smiled softly at him. He stuffed the rest into his mouth and then stood up, gesturing. "Bath... maybe it'll... stop... this," he gestured at his dick with a somewhat sullen expression.

Kyo chuckled though his eyes lingered on the bulge in Die's pants for a few moments, a spike of lust going through him. "Maybe so..." He stood up and wandered after Die, smelling the incense and feeling relaxed already.

Die made quick work of lighting everything up when he got into the bathroom, then plugging the tub and turning on the water. He added in some oil and set the vial back in the little holder they had for them, starting to shuck off his clothing. "You know, I don't normally disagree with my body... but, honest to god, I have no idea what's going on with this."

Kyo entered the bathroom and watched Die go about getting everything ready, smiling at his lover's attention to details. He removed his own clothing, tossing it in the hamper then going to brush his teeth real quick and assess his need for grooming. "Mm, I don't know...I guess you could say you have the weirdest boner right now..."

Die was dumping his belongings into the small basket he'd put in the bathroom for just that purpose. Glancing back at Kyo, he chuckled and then shrugged. "I'm never going to turn you down unless I'm dying over the toilet or something, you know that."

Ditching a few more things into the basket, he finally went about getting his clothing off and into the hamper, heading for the tub and then slowly sliding down into the very hot water.

Kyo licked his lips and smirked, moving over to the tub to join Die, letting out a near erotic groan as he slid into the water. "Mmm, it's been a while since we've had a bath..."

"It has... and maybe we should make sure we do this at least once a month, hmm?" Die shifted around until he had his legs sort of resting over Kyo's in the slowly raising water.

Kyo nodded in agreement then sunk down some, leaning back against the edge with a sigh. "I'm glad you talked me into doing up a huge bath like this. It beats the hell out of going to the public baths whenever you want to soak."

Die nodded and then slid back a bit, sighing as he peered down at his dick, which was definitely still poking out of the water, fully erect. "Okay, seriously..." he reached for the water, making it slightly less hot for the rest of the bath water. Giving up, he wrapped his hand around his dick and leaned back, just starting to stroke himself off, heedless of Kyo sitting right there.

Kyo cracked open his eyes and watched Die go after his dick, undeniably turned on by the action. He shifted slightly, reaching down to grope at his steadily hardening cock.

Die obviously wasn't wasting time, his hips pushing up as he beat himself off, groaning softly as he made himself really quickly at least aroused by the touch of his hand. "Fuck," he breathed out, and then a quiet laugh. "Gonna ruin the bathwater before it ever gets filled at this rate."

Kyo let out a low chuckle, slowly stroking himself as he watched Die. "Just jizz onto the floor...we'll get it later..."

A quiet grunt left Die's mouth at that, the idea of intentionally doing something dirty like that giving him a good helping hand in the proper direction. It didn't take long before he was straining up from the bathtub, going at his dick full-steam, something he didn't honestly often do in front of Kyo. But his lover wasn't stopping him from it, and some part of him was turned on by the fact that Kyo was just watching him, slowly stroking his own cock.

Kyo just watched Die, letting his own lust slowly boil within him. Die's unrestricted actions soon had him fully hard, his hand quickening over his own length as he breathed out a soft moan.

Die reached to the side and shut off the water, his hand still moving rapidly over his cock. In the next moment, he pushed himself up and leaned over the edge of the tub, letting out a low groan as thick spurts of cum shot out across the tiles beside the tub. Relief was instant and he just milked himself until he was done, flicking the last bit off with his finger and then settling back into the tub with a quiet sigh, shooting Kyo a small smirk. "Enjoy the show?"

As Die pushed up, Kyo shifted to watch as his lover came on the floor, a smirk playing on his lips. When Die eased himself back into the tub, Kyo pulled his hand away from his dick and leaned back, grinning at the other. "Always, gorgeous..."

"Mmm..." Die eased his legs back over Kyo's own and settled there. "Remind me to give you one more often?"

Kyo chuckled and winked. "Will do..." He shifted and started rubbing Die's legs, ignoring his erection for now.

Die strained up from the tub, reaching behind himself to turn off the light, leaving the only thing on, the small candle on the sink and the faint glow of the tip of the incense. Settling back in, he smiled across the tub at his lover, though he could barely see him. "Hey gorgeous."

Kyo blinked into the darkness then grinned, shifting forward to seat himself astride Die's lap. "Hey..." He leaned in to press their lips together, feeling more than a little needy at this point.

Having his lover plant himself in his lap made Die more than a little bit aware that his dick was still fully hard, not even a little bit down from having jerked himself off. With a quiet sound, he settled again, reaching to get Kyo's hips and drag him forward. Pressing his lips to Kyo's ear, he breathed out, "Shit... I'm still hard."

Kyo shuddered as Die breathed into his ear, the action and words shooting straight to his dick. He groaned and pushed his hips forward just enough that their lengths brushed against one another. "Hnng...yes, you are."

Grabbing Kyo's ass, Die arched up toward him, slowly thrusting against his cock, moaning softly. He nipped lightly at Kyo's neck, following it with a lick.

Kyo groaned and leaned in, rocking his hips in time with Die's thrusts, his hands going trail down Die's chest, palms grazing his nipples. "Die...," he moaned out, his voice barely above a whisper.

Die's teeth lightly grazed over Kyo's earlobe, tugging just a bit at it before releasing it and then whispering, "Can you take me without prep, or has it been too long?"

Kyo shivered at the very idea and thought on it before reaching behind Die and grabbing the little bottle of lube they kept stored behind the soap bottles. Pressing it into Die's hand, he leaned in and kissed his lover passionately with a hint of desperation. "I'm good..."

Die shifted, grabbing the lube and pushing up enough to stroke some of the lubricant onto his dick. Once he had it on him, he put the bottle aside and adjusted Kyo, sliding his dick back over his taint and then pressing against his entrance. 

Looking up into his eyes, he took in a breath, matching Kyo's rate, and then breathed out, thrusting up into him on the exhale.

Kyo mentally prepared himself, forcing his body to relax. It had been quite a while since anything larger than a couple of his fingers had been inside him, but he knew without a doubt he could handle the pain and in fact relished it to a point. 

When Die pushed into him, he couldn't stop from crying out as the pleasure-pain seared through him. The way Die instantly filled had his cock twitching and he found himself with his face pushed against Die's neck. "O-oh..."

Die didn't relent after he'd pushed into Kyo's body. Instead, he started to thrust, holding Kyo close to him, but enough up from him that he could actually fuck him without too much difficulty.

Kyo held onto Die, pushing his hips downward on the upward thrusts, shuddering as his lover hit all the right spots. He licked and nipped at Die's neck as they went, moaning against his skin every now and again.

"We need," Die moaned quietly, "to fuck," a shaky breath, "in the dark... more often." He grabbed Kyo and kept him still for a moment, thrusting up hard and fast for about thirty seconds before he calmed back down and eased up on holding Kyo still.

Kyo huffed out a laugh then clung to Die as he was held still. The quick thrusts into his body had him crying out as a few of them brushed right over his prostate. "Oh Gods...yes..." He shifted his body forward slightly, enough so that his cock was brushing against Die's stomach, pulling another sound of pleasure from him.

"Fuck yourself on me... I want you moving on my dick as hard as you can," Die breathed out.

Die's words flipped a switch within Kyo, and in an instant, he shifted into a better position and began riding Die as hard as he could, practically bouncing on his dick. Breathless moans spilled from his lips as he moved, his cock bobbing, splashing in the water.

"That's right," Die cooed out, his hips arching to attempt to help with the water sloshing, his hands gliding over Kyo's sides and then up over his back and down to his ass where he grabbed on harshly. "Ride me like the most desperate man in the entire world."

Kyo groaned loudly, reaching out to grip the edge of the tub as he fucked himself on Die's cock. He began panting, his head falling backward. "Touch...my dick...," he pleaded, so close he could taste. "Ah...please!"

Those words sent heat straight to Die's groin and immediately one hand came around to grasp at Kyo's length, starting to stroke him off hard and fast. "C'mon baby... just like this... make it fucking rain," he growled out.

The minute Die touched him, Kyo was gone. He slammed himself down on Die's cock, burying it deep inside his body as he began to cum, spurt after spurt shooting up out of his dick and into the water. "Die!"

Die arched up from the water, letting at least some of Kyo's cum fall on him instead of just into the water. With a groan, he started to thrust again, panting as he reached for the stars himself, teetering on the edge, but not quite there.

Kyo whined as Die started thrusting into him again. He settled and held on for the ride, clenching his ass around his lover's cock. Truth be told, it had been far too long since he'd been taken, and it felt amazing enough that he was still hard and really wanted more. 

A moan left his lips as he slipped his hand down, cupping his balls for now, his cock still a bit too sensitive. "Hnng..."

Die pushed up into Kyo a few more times and then let out a strangled sound, cumming nearly as hard as the first time, his back actually cracking from how hard he was straining up toward him.

Kyo held still as Die came inside him, feeling every spurt of cum as it filled him. He moaned lowly, clenching around his lover a few times then settling, his hand going to cup the back of Die's neck. "Gods..."

Die gave it a few more seconds before he eased up, sinking down into the bathwater again, moaning out a soft sigh of pleasure. "Christ, Kyo."

Kyo leaned forward and pressed his face against Die's shoulder, groaning softly. "Hnn...," was all he could manage, his body giving a little tremble.

He gave it a bit before pulling out and easing himself down under the water, resting Kyo against his stomach for the time being. Still, his cock was not slackening at all, and he lolled his head to the side, a very perplexed look on his face.

Kyo shifted to aid Die in moving then slumped against his lover, reaching down to grasp his own cock, squeezing a bit. He wasn't fully hard but he was definitely still turned on. 

Die, however, was rock hard, and that was a very curious thing for his lover. He knew Die could go a few rounds sometimes, but for his cock to not even soften a little in between...it was like he'd taken something. 

Kyo blinked and looked up at Die, a curious look on his face. "Hey...Die...what all's in your pill case?"

"Hmm?" Die asked quietly, trying to get himself to focus a bit more and then shrugged, "Ahhh... let's see... four Xanax, a few Loxonin... Aspirin... one of the quick dissolve Vitamin Cs I picked up from the states... that's about it. Why?"

Kyo squirmed a bit then pressed lightly against Die's persistent erection. "Because this is starting to remind me of that time you took a certain little blue pill...."

Die looked confused for a moment and then breathed out a quiet, "Oh shit..." his eyes widening and a soft sound leaving him before he leaned his head back. "Oh my fucking shit."

Kyo pursed his lips and let out a huff. "I'll take that as a confirmation that you got them mixed up..."

"Boss... he sort of gave me one I was going to use for your birthday. And then I... sort of forgot... and now I... sort of... have a massive hard-on." He sighed softly and then tilted his head back, groaning faintly. "No wonder it didn't help my anxiety."

Kyo snorted and leaned up, kissing Die's lips then shrugging. "Well, I'm sorta still hard myself....so...."

"That's... fortunate," Die returned, breathing out a quiet laugh. "Because otherwise, I foresee a lot of beating off in my future."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head. "I wouldn't leave you hanging like that..." He dipped his hand beneath the water, stroking over Die's length slowly, nuzzling against his neck.

A low groan bubbled up from Die's throat, followed closely by a little laugh. "Should recommend this to Kaoru as stress relief... without the anxiety issues, I think it'd be useful."

Kyo huffed out a laugh, shaking his head. "Better consult with Toshiya on that...though I imagine he'd be glad to have Kaoru riled up...."

Die let out a quiet laugh, shaking his head a little. "Yeah, I think you're right." His hand slid down to lightly lay over Kyo's own, just holding onto him while his lover's fingertips stroked his cock. "Keep it slow," he purred out, sinking down into the tub and closing his eyes. "Just be so... very... gentle."

Kyo let out another chuckle then focused on the task at hand. He went slowly with his strokes, gliding his hand up and down Die's length as he nipped at his neck. "Mmn..."

The redhead let out a quiet hum as the other touched him, tilting his head to give him access. "You know... sometimes I just want you to mark me where the world can see..."

A smirk crossed Kyo's lips at that, and he shifted forward, pressing his lips to Die's skin before letting his teeth graze the spot. His hand moved to cup and roll Die's sack in his palm as he gradually began sucking his lover's skin.

"Oh god," Die breathed out, arching up under him, panting a little as he was slowly ramped up every second by what Kyo was doing. "Shit, baby..." his hips jerked a bit, a moan leaving his lips.

The vocalist let out a soft little groan, pulling back from Die's neck then moving down to the juncture of his shoulder. There, he bit into his lover's skin, sucking hard as he continued to roll Die's balls in his palm.

Die groaned, his hips jerking up toward Kyo and then settling down. His hand came to press against the back of Kyo's head. "Fuck... do it," he hissed quietly.

Kyo growled and moved his hand up to stroke over Die's length before finally sealing his lips over the patch of skin. He sucked hard, making sure to bring the blood to the surface, bruising his lover and effectively marking him in the process. When he pulled his head back to check, he moaned at the new mark on Die's skin then leaned down to bite into it hard for good measure as his thumb swiped over the tip of his dick.

By the time Kyo actually had him marked, Die's eyes had rolled back in his head, and he was basically having to restrain himself from humping up against Kyo in a near-rabid fashion. He cried out when the other bit down, grabbing Kyo's hand and starting to jack himself off with it rapidly.

The way Die reacted had Kyo groaning softly as he allowed his lover to control his hand. After a moment though, he pulled away and stood, bending himself over the edge of the tub, presenting his ass to his lover. "I need you...," he murmured, his cock hanging heavy between his legs as evidence.

Die groaned when Kyo turned away. He honestly almost took hold of his cock to finish himself off, he was so worked up. But Kyo presenting himself made his decision for him. Pushing himself up, he situated himself behind Kyo and thrust inside him, moaning loudly.

Kyo cried out quite loudly when Die thrusted into him, his back arching with pleasure. "Oh fuck...yes!" He pushed his hips back, undulating against Die in a way.

There wasn't but a few seconds before Die all out lost it, hunching over Kyo and going at him like an animal, all feeling and mindless rutting.

The way Die was going after him had Kyo panting and moaning heavily. He held on to the edge of the tub, using his position to push back to meet Die's movements. "Yes, fuck me....harder!"

Die didn't even hesitate in the least when he was told to fuck Kyo harder, he simply reacted, doing it as hard as he could without breaking something vital: Kyo or the bathroom pieces.

Kyo let out a strangled sound as Die pounded into him. He finally shifted enough to grab his own cock, stroking his hand over it. It wasn't but a few seconds before his cries were echoing out in the bathroom as he came hard, his cum spurting over the edge of the tub. "DIE!"

The instant Kyo released, it set Die off so hard he forgot to even restrain himself in the least for the last dozen or so thrusts, slamming into Kyo so hard that the edge of the tub was sure to bruise him. When he finally came, he actually screamed, straining for it as hard as he possibly could.

The way Die slammed into him actually sent pain shooting up his spine but Kyo relished every moment of it. He shuddered hard as he felt Die cum into him, the way his lover screamed out his pleasure making him moan softly. "O-oh...Gods..."

There were a few more seconds and then Die stilled, settling and just trying to catch his breath or even see straight. "My fuckin' eyes are crossed, Jesus."

Kyo huffed out a breathless laugh then groaned. "I don't think...I'll be able to walk tomorrow..."

Die winced as he pulled out and then shifted back, still holding onto Kyo's hips to check if he was bleeding or anything, relieved to find he at least wasn't in that way. He gently tugged Kyo back into the water and then pulled the plug, turning on the water again so they could get hot water back in. "I'm sorry, love... I didn't mean to hurt you."

Kyo whined softly when Die pulled back then eased himself down, leaning against Die's chest with a sigh. He shook his head, turning to look up at the redhead. "I meant that in a good way...it's been a long time since you've been so...forceful."

Die reached to run his hand through Kyo's hair and then kissed his shoulder gently. "You sure you're okay?"

Kyo hummed softly, closing his eyes, feeling rather exhausted. "Mmm, yes, I'm fine, love. What about you?"

The guitarist wrapped his arms around Kyo, only letting go to plug the tub back up and then turn off the water so they'd half re-filled the bath to relax in the warm again. "I..." he breathed out a quiet laugh, "well, my dick is still hard, but I'm not sure I want it to be remotely touched right now. Disadvantages to it... I still feel like a total idiot."

Kyo relaxed against Die, sighing as the warm water enveloped his lower half once more. "Mm…I've been there a few times...but," he leaned his head back enough to press a kiss to Die's cheek. "You're not an idiot..."

"That's the last time I keep two blue pills next to one another," Die murmured softly before huffing out a laugh.

Kyo snorted lightly and nodded. "That's probably a good idea..." He shifted a bit and groaned before settling again, his eyes sliding shut.

"Not... that I have any others... to keep anywhere." He shifted his arms around Kyo so the other would be more comfortable and just settled in, his gaze on the flicker of the candle across the room.

Kyo turned his head so he could press his nose against Die's neck, one hand finding one of Die's and lacing their fingers together. "Mmn, no? Well, if you get more, we'll just save them for special occasions."

Die breathed out a laugh. "It was supposed to be for a special occasion... but definitely zero out of ten, would not recommend for a panic attack. You just want to sob in a corner... with a boner. However, once the panic is gone, definitely skyrockets in recommendation levels."

Kyo laughed and shook his head, squeezing Die's hand. "I noticed...if the bruises to my backside...and everywhere else are any indication." He smirked, knowing in the following days that seeing those bruises or feeling the twinges of pain from sore muscles would only serve as reminders of this moment. Something he enjoyed a good bit from a rough session.

Die lifted one hand up to dance over his own bruised skin. He shivered a little and then let out a quiet grunt. "I adore you in so many ways, and sometimes I don't feel like I tell you enough."

Kyo flushed a bit at that and shifted so that he could kiss Die softly. "I love you, Koi."

"Love you, too." Die slid his hands down to rub lightly at Kyo's inner thighs, just touching him in a sort of arousing way despite not being sure if his cock was even capable of another touch again right then, though still stiff as ever.

Kyo shivered at the touch, parting his legs for his lover's wandering hands. He lifted one of his own to brush through Die's hair, lightly pushing his head down against his neck in a silent request.

Die's lips nipped at his skin and then migrated lower, thinking about placement. But after a few seconds, he grunted and moved up again, realizing Kyo wore no shirt a good ninety percent of the time, and it wouldn't matter where he put it; it'd be obvious they'd rode one another hard anyway. His mouth sealed over the area, and he started to suck on the skin, teeth nipping a bit as his hands kept wandering the entire area.

The moment Die began sucking at his skin, Kyo let out a soft whine of pleasure. He let his eyes flutter shut, his hand cupping the back of Die's neck, the other going to lightly brush over his arm. "Hnng..."

Die finally settled on just cupping Kyo's cock and balls, not really doing anything more, just holding him while he sucked on the skin. Once he was satisfied, he gave it a few licks and then let it go, a gleam in his eyes as he surveyed the damage. "Management... is going to have a cow."

Kyo wasn't hard again yet but he pushed up into Die's touch, enjoying it anyway. When his lover pulled back, he reached up to press his fingers against the now tender skin, smirking. "Good...they deserve it after today." He shifted enough to get his hand down between them, brushing his fingers lightly over Die's cock.

Die's breath hissed in, and then he squirmed a little. "Still too sensitive for now, baby." He kissed the spot and then settled, his hand still possessively over Kyo's junk. He breathed out a little laugh after a moment. "Sometimes when people are talking about your dick, and I can hear them, I just want to open the bus window and tell them I've already laid my claim."

Kyo nodded a bit and pulled his hand away, resting it atop Die's over his own cock. He snorted softly and leaned back to look up at his lover, smirking. "Is that so?"

"It is... especially those annoying ones who run after you and make you look like you're about to shit yourself to get away from them. Seriously... not okay with the fact that usually ten minutes earlier they're talking about wanting to be up on your dick." Die's lip curled up a bit and then he winced, ducking his head. "Damn it..."

As Die spoke about the crazier fans, Kyo curled his nose in disgust then shook his head. "I'm not overly fond of that shit myself." He shifted and looked up at Die, frowning a bit, his hand moving to pat his lover's cheek. "But they're not here and never will be..."

Die did his best to piece himself back into the usually passive man he was known to be, giving a small nod and then quietly breathing out, "Good news..."

Kyo licked his lips and reached down, gently disengaging Die's hand from his cock and balls before turning around and straddling him, mindful of his sensitive cock. He cupped Die's cheek and leaned in, kissing him hard on the lips before pulling back, eyes half-lidded. "I find it...incredibly sexy when you get possessive..."

Die let out a soft huff of a laugh and settled his hands on Kyo's hips instead. "Mmm... I'm glad you do, because it's always in there somewhere, swimming around in the depths of my soul." He peered up at him and then murmured, "The good news is that my epic boner is going away."

Kyo chuckled and leaned in to nibble Die's lower lip. "I suppose that is good news..." He pulled back and offered Die a smile before glancing down at Die's now softening cock. "I thought for sure you'd be up for another round though."

"Seriously, do not put it past me. Though, frankly... I'd rather not fuck in the tub again. I'm old, and the bed sounds good." He breathed out a laugh, just smirking up at Kyo.

Kyo let out a snort and finally eased himself back, pushing up into a standing position with a groan. "Shower first? Then we'll think about it?"

"Sounds like a hell of a deal to me." Die reached to unplug the drain and then couldn't resist at all, face-planting against Kyo's belly and making a few loud sounds against it, laughing just after.

Kyo was about to turn around to step out of the tub when his lover's face pressed into his stomach. He let out a peal of laughter, unable to stop it as his hand came to rest against the top of Die's head. "St-stop…that freaking tickles!"

Die chuckled, pulling back and grinning up at him. "Mmm, only cause you said ‘freaking’, and that's adorable."

Kyo puffed out a breath, giving Die's hair a playful tug. "I am not adorable. I am fierce." He sneered then grinned, ruining the effect entirely.

"Mmhmm, sure you are." Die patted his side. "Get in the shower, Mr. Fierce."

Kyo snorted then turned, gingerly making his way out of the tub. He padded over to the shower, reaching in and turning the water on hot. He waited until steam was forming before he stepped in under the spray, groaning softly. "Mmm..."

Die waited on the tub to drain, making a quick rinse and spray-down of it before joining Kyo in the shower, quickly going about getting himself cleaned up, already feeling like a water-logged prune.

Kyo took his time, definitely feeling the effects of having been ridden so hard. It was the kind of pain and soreness that he enjoyed immensely though, and he couldn't quite stop smiling as he shampooed his hair.

"You sure are chipper for just having had your stomach rearranged by the tub," Die commented, one eyebrow arched a bit as he watched Kyo.

Kyo rinsed his hair and added a bit of conditioner over the still short locks. He opened his eyes and looked at Die, smirking. "Can't help it...you fucked all of my sanity away..."

"Oh... well, I'll have to remember how to do that." Die nudged him out of the way to rinse himself off, slicking the water from his hair and then grabbing the conditioner for himself.

Kyo chuckled softly, moving for his lover then moving back to rinse his hair. After he was done, he went about washing his body, letting out a quiet hiss as the soap found a scratch or two.

Die shifted a bit and then settled back, watching Kyo as he stood there washing off. "If there's one thing you would really want me to do in the bedroom tonight... what is it?"

Kyo paused in his actions, chewing his bottom lip. There were many things he could request but they'd just fucked hard, and he didn't want to push his or Die's limits. He thought on it as he moved to rinse the soap off, finally coming to a decision.

"Maybe...bind my wrists and fuck me again?"

"Still hard or...?" Die tilted his head a little.

Kyo hummed and bit his lip. "Somewhat...."

"I need a bit more definition than that... limits and all." Die studied him carefully, his eyes curious as he gently moved Kyo again and quickly rinsed his conditioner out.

Kyo took a breath and considered it. They had been pretty rough already but at the same time, he was craving just a little more of the next level of pain, the day's frustrations having put him close to that mindset. "Yeah, hard...and...hurt me."

"Any way I please?" Die asked as he stepped back out from under the spray of the shower.

Kyo nodded, moving to slip his arms around Die's waist for a moment. "Your choice is fine with me."

"Okay." Die offered a small smile and then hugged Kyo briefly. "Give me ten before you come out."

Kyo nodded again then moved to turn the water off, stepping out to dry himself thoroughly. "Anyway you'd like me to prepare...?"

"Mm... yeah, actually prep for me. Just lube and stretching as much as you feel is necessary." Die shrugged a bit and then stepped out, quickly drying himself off and squeezing his hair.

Kyo smirked. "Will do..." He moved over to the sink, going about brushing his teeth and then getting out the razor, simply for something to do while he waited the length of time Die requested.

Die stepped out of the bathroom and then closed the door, heading to the bedroom. Once inside, he turned off the lights and made sure he was completely dry, sticky skin always getting to him during sex. He worked himself back up to full hardness, glad for the pill despite not meaning to have taken it to start with. He lubed his dick and then wiped his hands with a tissue.

Settling on the edge of the bed, he leaned back and waited, just putting himself into the right mindset for what Kyo wanted.

Kyo make quick work of ridding himself of any stubble before pulling out a tube of lube from the cabinet. He slicked his fingers up and propped his foot up on edge of the tub, pushing two fingers into himself with a groan. He snorted lightly to himself as he realized that prep wasn't exactly needed at this point in the evening, but he followed through anyway. He found and stroked over his prostate until his cock was rock hard and he was letting out little moans of pleasure. 

Pulling his fingers free, he stepped over to the sink to wash his hands then dried them thoroughly before exiting the bathroom. Making his way down the hall, he paused outside their bedroom, taking a moment to compose himself and slide into the role he so desperately wanted to be in. Stepping into the bedroom, he shut the door and stood there, eyes downcast, arms at his sides as he awaited Die's instruction.

Die took his time, quietly waiting on the other to go ahead and shut the door once he was inside the bedroom. When he was, he smirked and tilted his head back a little. "Come get on the bed, lie face down, get your dick in a comfortable position, and then close your legs."

Kyo blinked a little in surprise but inclined his head. "Yes, Sir," he murmured before going to do just as he was told, having to shift around a bit to get his dick in a position that wasn't painful. Once he had, he closed his legs as instructed, his head pillowed on his arms for now.

Die waited on Kyo to get settled and then voice a quiet, but firm, "Are you prepared?"

Kyo let out a breath and nodded. "I am."

Within a few moments, Die pulled himself up onto the bed and moved to straddle Kyo's thighs. He positioned his dick and then slid it down his crack until he found his entrance, pushing in quickly and just starting to go at Kyo, heedless of anything else, not pausing or checking any longer.

Kyo heard Die move but didn't look back, staying perfectly still as he waited for his lovers' next move. When Die straddled his thighs and pushed into him, he let out a moan, his hips automatically trying to push up into it.

Die's hand came down to push on Kyo's hips, holding him still as he pumped into him, grunting faintly. "Stay still."

Kyo let out a soft whine at the command, bucking up once more, but then stilling as best as he could with Die fucking him like that.

The guitarist let out a sharp hiss of breath, reaching up to the headboard and really starting to lay into Kyo, closing his eyes and just feeling, trying to push any worry or thought from his mind about Kyo's desires for a moment, seeing if he could find that 'use me' sort of place that sort of went with the whole ordeal.

Kyo grunted and shifted his arms, stretching them out above his head, palms pressing against the headboard. He was incredibly aroused by the way Die was fucking him, the angle not providing him with enough stimulation to really get him off. "Yes, use me...," he hissed out, moaning just after.

Die let out a faint sound, but didn't respond, acting as if Kyo wasn't there and hadn't said a thing. He laid into it harder, panting as he started to go at it so vigorously that he could barely catch his breath.

Kyo groaned as Die went harder, squirming on the bed a bit now, his cock rubbing against the sheets with each thrust.

For a while, Die just kept thrusting, moaning as he started to ramp up. He wanted to cum, but he knew it hadn't been long enough for Kyo yet, and if he did it now, it wouldn't be nearly as good given how many orgasms he'd already had. Finally, he stilled, just remaining there, flexing his cock a little bit.

Kyo was panting by the time Die stilled, his hands griping the sheets, his face rubbing against the pillow. He whined when he felt Die's cock twitching in him, automatically rolling his hips up to get a reaction.

Die's hand came down to press on Kyo's shoulder in warning when he moved, shifting his legs up a bit more so he could fuck him faster, though not as hard.

Kyo gritted his teeth to keep from fighting against Die's hold. In a way, he wanted to piss Die off just a bit, but he didn't want to push too far. So, he settled for arching his back slightly, his ass pushing up as he did, his inner walls clamping around Die for a moment.

The bed creaked as the redhead really laid into it, starting up moaning loudly, shuddering as he started to ramp up, unwilling to stop it this time.

Kyo actually cried out when Die shifted just so and hit his prostate, sending spikes of pleasure shooting straight to his cock. He groaned and finally gave up on trying to be still, rutting against the mattress as Die fucked him.

Die let out a loud moan when Kyo started moving, his own pleasure boosting at that point. He shuddered and started to cum, already having been teetering on the edge.

Kyo groaned as he felt Die cumming inside him, stilling again just to focus on it. He gave a shudder then an experimental twitch to his hips, his cock throbbing with the need to cum.

Die pulled out the moment Kyo tried to move back against him, backing himself up enough that Kyo couldn't touch him without entirely moving from the position, smirking down at him a bit.

The vocalist let out a sound of protest, his arms shifting as if he would move but then he stilled. He lowered himself down against the bed again, sighing in defeat before whispering out, "Please..."

"Please what?"

He turned his head back slightly, letting out a groan. "Please let me cum."

"Missing something there..." Die lightly pushed at the back of Kyo's head.

Kyo turned his head slightly, biting his lip. "Please let me cum...Sir."

"That's better." Die grabbed his hips and yanked him upright, hissing out, "Knees," and hoping he'd get the point before he flopped back down on his dick on the mattress when Die let go.

Kyo was very quick to draw his knees up under himself, groaning a bit as Die pulled him around.

Die hooked one arm under Kyo's middle and then issued, "Do it then."

Kyo licked his lips and braced himself with one arm while reaching down between his legs to wrap his hand around his cock. He started jerking off hard and fast, his hand but a blur over his length.

Die held onto Kyo, tilting his head a bit and waiting on Kyo to finish, not at all expressing any interest or disinterest in any fashion that the vocalist could see.

Kyo's hips jerked and he let out a moan as his orgasm hit him. Rivulets of cum erupted from his cock and dripped onto the bed as a shudder slid through him.

For a few moments, Die sat there, just holding Kyo and then asked in a disinterested voice, "You done?"

Kyo stroked himself a few more times then let go of his cock, holding out his cum stained hand. Die's tone made him purse his lips, an almost pout forming there. "Yes."

Die gave it a few moments and then dropped Kyo, wondering what he'd do.

Kyo grunted as he fell to the bed after Die released him. He laid still for a moment, before smirking to himself and flexing his inner muscles, forcing Die's cum to dribble down his legs, a blatant tease for his lover.

For a few seconds, Die said nothing and did nothing. Finally, he brought a hard spank down on Kyo's ass, hard enough it bounced Kyo forward a bit and goosed him just after.

Kyo was not expecting to be spanked and let out a rather unmanly yelp. He turned his head back and looked at Die, pulling a pout even as his ass wiggled.

Die gave it two more firm slaps and then settled back, smirking. "Satisfied?"

Kyo grunted then slumped against the bed, letting out a sigh. "Mmm...for now."

Easing himself down next to Kyo, Die tugged him closer. "Talk to me."

Kyo shifted onto his side, nuzzling into Die. "It was good...the way you had me positioned...it was definitely close to feeling like I was being used…"

Die nodded a little and then reached to caress the side of Kyo's face. "Mmmhmm... and is that what you wanted me to aim for sort of?"

Kyo hummed, leaning into Die's touch, his eyelids sliding halfway shut. "Mhm...pretty much...I just want to be your plaything."

Die nodded slightly. "Okay. I'm... is there anything you need now that we're done?" It was almost painfully obvious he was trying his best to go by the books... and about half failing. But at least he was trying.

Kyo gave Die a half smile and leaned in, kissing him softly. "I'm fine right now, love...perfectly fine..." He was seriously losing his battle with exhaustion but he kept smiling, feeling rather boneless right then.

Die pressed a kiss to the other's lips and then tugged him closer, nuzzling into his neck. "I love you."

Kyo let out a soft sound, curling against Die, his hand stroking his back. "Love you, too, Koi."


	68. Chapter 68

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Die sat across the patio from Kyo, a cigarette burning between the fingers of his left hand. He wasn't smoking it and had done his best not to inhale it fully into his lungs when he'd lit it. But today had been yet another stress-filled day, though thankfully this one was for entirely different reasons than the last few. He tended to enjoy the scent of the smoke still, though he always managed not to smoke the cigarette. There was one pack left in the planter by the door just for this purpose, and he always brought Kyo out with him so that if he started toward his mouth with it out of old habits, Kyo could call him on it. 

One weary hand rubbed over his face. It had been a long day recording, and it had been his turn in the booth, leaving him drained and frustrated that one part just wouldn't come out right for him. He was down to having to change the solo since he'd aimed for the stars and shot too far on it. He hadn't told Kyo - or anyone - yet, but he would have to work on it tomorrow. Maybe just simplify the parts he didn't really want to, but he feared it'd be more like reworking entirely in the end before he'd be happy. At least they were still early on this song though.

Glancing up at Kyo, he offered a small smile. "Dinner was good; thank you for cooking for us tonight. Just wasn't up to it."

Kyo watched the smoke curl from the tip of Die's unsmoked cigarette. Part of him still longed to take the stick and inhaled from it, to taste the acrid smoke swirling through his mouth and burning his nose as he blew it out. 

Die spoke, and he looked up, smiling in return. "You're welcome. It was very nearly a disaster when power cut off. Thankfully, it didn't last long enough to ruin it." He peered at his lover, dragging his hand through his hair. "Hard day in the booth, huh?"

"Yeah... you could say that." Die shrugged a bit, closing his eyes and tilting his head back, trying to let the smoke relax him. "Recording days are always hell for me, though."

Kyo reached over and ran his hand up Die's arm in sympathy. "I know..." He wasn't overly fond of the recording booth himself, always finding it to be stifling.

Die leaned into the touch, a soft smile on his lips at the touch. "I love you."

Kyo turned and smiled at his lover, leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek. "I love you, too, darling."

Die opened his eyes when the other kissed his cheek, grunting faintly. He flicked some ashes off from his cigarette and settled again.

Kyo settled back and looked up at the sky, peering at the faint bit of stars the city lights allowed to filter through. His thoughts ran away with him, and he started thinking about the recent night Die had taken the wrong pill and ended up with a raging erection. The after effects of which were still visible on his neck. His hand reached up to swipe over the gradually fading bruise as he thought of how rough Die had been that night and just how much it had gotten him off. He let a little shiver slide through him as thought on it.

Die glanced over toward the other when he was silent for so long, tilting his head a bit and watching the other. "Your thoughts seem so far away. What's on your mind?"

Kyo turned his head to look at Die for a moment then ducked it, shrugging a bit as he did. "I was actually thinking about the other night...," he murmured.

Die watched the way Kyo ducked his head. Tilting his head, he moved his foot out to poke at Kyo's knee with it. "So shy all of a sudden... what's up?"

Kyo huffed and ran a hand through his hair, shrugging again. "I just..." He paused, entirely unsure of how to say what he wanted without sounding as though he were unsatisfied. After chew his bottom lip for a moment, he tried again, hoping Die wouldn't take it the wrong way. "I really like the way you were with me...so rough and harsh....but at the same time...I couldn't stop thinking of how much I wanted it to go further."

A slow smile spread over Die's lips as he bent over and snubbed out the cigarette. Sitting back, he studied Kyo and licked his lips a little. "I've been waiting on this actually."

Kyo looked a little confused, cocking his head to the side. "You...have?"

"Mmmhmm... you looked so incredibly... boneless... after I fucked you that last time. And honestly, I sort of get it now... how that end feels and what it means." He pursed his lips a little and then smiled again. "So... what's in your mind, Kyo? What's got your head up in the clouds?"

Kyo shivered again, licking his lips and nodding. He was glad that Die understood now, because it had been difficult before, trying to explain why he wanted things like this so much. He took a deep breath then exhaled, folding one knee up to rest his chin on it. "I was just considering...what it'd be like to have you....utterly dominate me...in more ways than one."

Die gave a little nod, leaning back and bringing his foot up, putting one foot up between Kyo's legs, though not touching, just an inch or so away. "What sort of ways? I need concrete examples here, darling."

Kyo's eyes flicked down to Die's foot, and he squirmed slightly. He let out a breath and then took another, contemplating on what he wanted to say. "Okay, I know we've discussed this but...I need to have my control taken from me completely. I...I need you to...essentially break me." He winced a little, realizing how bad that sounded but it was the truth. "I want to be forced around, rough-handled, hurt in ways that leave physical marks...be it with your hands or a crop...or whatever you choose." 

He sat there for a minute then looked down at the ground, shifting around in his seat. "I want you to use me for nothing more than a hole to fuck..."

Arousal surged through Die at the comments Kyo was making. Where he hadn't really understood the desires before, he now was at least much closer to a comprehension of it. He tilted his head back a bit and debated it. "So you want me to actually get violent with you. Not like... fake violent, but actually?"

Kyo rubbed his forearm, feeling both arousal and nervousness course through him. "Yes...I know you have a threshold, and I'm fine with that..."

"We're not talking about my thresholds right now. Right now we're talking about what you want. So you want pain, to the extent that I'm willing to deliver. Want to be fucked with no regard to your pleasure or if I'm hurting you, right?"

Kyo cleared his throat and nodded. "Yeah...and...some form of binding. Be it ropes, handcuffs...whatever."

Die's foot moved to nudge a bit at Kyo's balls, just using his toes to poke gently at the area. "Mmm... okay. What are your limits?"

Kyo squirmed at Die's actions, his pants tented out to show just how much this conversation was arousing. "Aside from our usual, I have very few limits that I can think of..."

"You're certain? There's nothing that would honestly panic you if I did it to the point you'd want out?" Die poked a bit more at his balls.

Kyo thought on it some more, Die's foot distracting him a bit. "I guess...I wouldn't want you to leave the room while I'm tied up and don't actually punch or kick me." His forehead wrinkled as he considered what else might bother him. "This one is kind of a no brainer, but no scat or vomit."

Die looked utterly horrified at the idea of the last part. "Yeeeahhh, no." He shuddered a bit. "That's... disconcerting in many ways. As a rule, we will never involve either throw up or shit in our activities." He paused and then tacked on, "Hard limit," letting on he'd been doing a bit of research obviously in what little spare time he had.

Kyo nodded. "Hard limit indeed. If we delve into something too much...we stop, figure it out then carry on"

"Okay... safe word?"

Kyo chewed his bottom lip a little, considering. "Guitar."

"Okay. That goes for either of us." He pursed his lips and then quietly breathed out, "And assuming you can't speak?"

Kyo nodded then tilted his head. "If I'm tied up and can't speak, three short whistles. If I can't speak but am not tied up, three taps anywhere on you."

"Okay, I'm pretty sure any of those will make me sort of stop and debate what the hell is happening even if I don't quite recall how many of each." He licked his lips a little and closed his eyes. "Hmm..." his foot snaked up a bit too lightly prod at Kyo's dick, seeing if he was hard at all.

Kyo nodded in agreement then groaned softly as Die pressed against him. He was partially hard, the topic at hand having helped quite a bit.

"Someone's aroused," Die murmured quietly. His foot continued to rub over the front of his pants, feeling Kyo getting harder and harder under his touch. "Maybe you'd like to come over here and suck my dick?"

Kyo let out a soft sound, his hips jerking up a bit against Die's foot. He looked over at his lover then shifted off of the seat, moving to kneel between Die's legs. He reached up and undid the other's pants, fishing his cock out before leaning in and starting to lick around the head with a soft moan.

Die's hand grasped his hair, yanking him back. "Did I tell you to? I asked you a fucking question."

Kyo's eyes opened wide, and he let out a surprised gasp, having not exactly expected Die's reaction. He looked up at Die then cast his eyes downward, his entire demeanor changing. "Sorry, Sir."

After a few moments, Die lightly shook Kyo's head by the hair. "Answer my question."

Kyo licked his lips, flicking his eyes up to Die's face once more. "Which one...Sir?"

"Would you like to suck my dick?" Die let go of his hair for the moment.

Kyo nodded. "I would."

Die cuffed the back of his head, shoving him down toward his dick. "Then suck it."

The vocalist bit back a moan as he leaned down the rest of the way, lowing his head on Die's dick and starting to suck him. He didn't want to seem too eager, but he was already rock hard, pushing the front of his thin lounge pants out so much it was almost comical.

Die held him there for a while, watching with a passive face, neither showing if he was pleased or displeased by what Kyo was doing. After a few minutes, he ordered, "Stand up."

Kyo bobbed his head on Die's dick diligently until he was ordered to stand. He did so, hands at his sides and head tilted downward slightly.

Die pointed to the edge of the concrete slab. "Kneel, feet in the grass, knees on the patio."

Kyo looked at the spot then moved over to it, kneeling as Die had commanded. The concrete was slightly painful, but he adjusted well enough, trusting that he wouldn't be there long.

"Reveal your cock." Die picked up his pack of cigarettes, quickly lighting another one and then tossing the pack and lighter back down into the planter, crossing one leg over the other, knowing it was cold. His free hand slid over his own dick, stroking it lightly as he watched Kyo, amused by how aroused he clearly was.

Kyo reached down and pushed his pants down beneath his dick and balls. He let out a sigh, pushing his hips up a bit then settling once more, gazing at Die with clear desire written in his eyes.

Die licked his lips and started to move the cigarette up to his lips, having no intention to actually smoke it, but wanting to see what would happen in Kyo's current state.

Kyo watched the cigarette as it moved towards Die's lips, his brow creasing. Surely Die wouldn’t actually smoke it, but then again...He chewed his lip, watching carefully.

Die was pleased with the fact that Kyo didn't say a thing, though he did look perplexed. He dropped his hand back to the chair arm. The urge was there, but he wasn't interested in that more than he was his dick currently in his hand. "Do not touch your dick... try to piss." Excitement tingled through him at the idea of watching Kyo's dick twitch and possibly give forth something he wanted to see.

The vocalist let out the softest of sighs when Die didn't follow through on the action of smoking. At his next commanded, Kyo shifted and balled his hands at his sides, straining for several moments before a dribble of piss ran out of his cock. He issued a faint moan as he pushed harder, more of the gold liquid spurting out.

"Stop," Die murmured quietly, a smirk on his lips. He licked his lips a bit. "Does it hurt? Do you want to finish?"

Kyo stopped with some difficulty, wincing, his hips jerking as a bit dribbled out. "A-ah...yes, it hurts...and yes…I would like to finish...please, Sir."

Die flicked some ashes off his cigarette and then shifted off his chair, coming to squat down next to Kyo. "Finish. Make a puddle, no matter where it goes, keep going until you're done."

Kyo squirmed a bit then started pissing again, moaning as relief flooded over it. He ended up making a good sized puzzle then stopped, pushing the last few spurts to spatter into the rest of it.

"Good," Die murmured quietly. Standing up, he moved around behind Kyo and grabbed his shirt, yanking him up by it and shoving him forward. "Inside. Go to the bedroom and pull your pants just under your ass. Kneel in the floor by the bed, arms on top of the mattress."

Kyo scrabbled to his feet as he was pulled up, wobbling a little. "Yes, Sir." He hurried inside and up the stairs, anticipation quickening his steps. He kneeled, pulled his pants down just where Die wanted, settling his arms on the mattress.

Die waited for a few moments before heading up after Kyo, being as quiet as he could be, not wanting to warn Kyo he was actually in the room if the vocalist had chosen to have his back to the door.

Once he stepped in, he paused, assessed the situation and then moved up behind Kyo, silently as possible. A second later, he lashed out, grabbing Kyo's head and shoving it into the mattress as he fell to his knees behind him. One hand held Kyo down hard against the softness of the sheets, his other hand getting his dick free of his pants.

Kyo kneeled there for what felt like an eternity before he thought he heard Die on the stairs. He wasn't entirely sure it wasn't one of the cats though, and so when Die's hand shoved him into the mattress, he let loose a shocked cry. He squirmed against the hold a bit, not wanting to be such an easy target.

Die let out a snarl, his hand swatting Kyo firmly on the ass. "Stay still, you little shit." He pushed his head down a bit more and then yanked it back, breathing against his ear, "You're mine. Do you hear that?" And then his face was in the mattress again.

Kyo barely bit back the moan that threatened to escape at the way Die reacted to his struggling. He did let out a whimper in response to the question, still squirming, though not quite as much.

Die debated his position for a moment, wondering exactly how one went about getting their sub prepped in such a scene. It seemed tricky to not break the scene while still doing it. Plus... he didn't have lube at all. It was in the drawer to the side of him.

He shoved at Kyo's head again and then stood up. He stared down at Kyo, waiting to see if the other moved. If he did, there was something part of him really wanted to try, but he was almost certain it was over the line. He shut the thought down for the time being and waited.

Kyo grunted when he was shoved harder into the bed then released. He stayed still for about a second before jerking his head to the side to glare at Die. "Give up already? Am I too much for you?" He smirked, sliding his tongue out over his bottom lip, waiting on the inevitable retaliation.

For the first time in eons, Die felt the white hot flash of anger surge through him. He wanted to respond in a certain way, but he didn't dare. The urge forced his fingers to tremble as he clenched them into a fist and then released them again. 

When he spoke again, he was deceptively calm. "Did I tell you that you could speak... or move?"

Kyo watched with a mix of arousal, excitement and just a tiny bit of fear as Die clenched his fist. He was certain of what kind of action Die was holding back, and it sent heat straight to his straining cock, making him bite his lip for a moment before responding. 

"You didn't tell me not to...."

Die's wrist twitched a bit, but he didn't move other than that. Instead, he raised his head and squared his shoulders, hissing out, "I shouldn't have to. You should know better."

Kyo just pursed his lips and rolled his eyes, pushing himself up slightly. "Oh I should, should I?" He couldn't help it, he knew he was pushing it, but damned if he didn't want the resulting punishment.

Die's hesitation became clearer after a few seconds, and it took everything he had not to actually lash out at Kyo. He wanted nothing more than to slap that beautiful face and wipe the sassy look off of it. But he didn't dare. Nope... not without talking to Kyo first. And he sure as hell didn't want to break scene on something so intense and ruin the whole thing for Kyo... again.

Finally, he barked out, "Shut the fuck up, and put your fucking face back down against the mattress, or so help me god you'll regret it."

Kyo stared at Die for a few moments before finally doing as he was commanded, giving a grunt into the mattress. He could tell his lover was hesitant about how far to go and with something like this, it was always important to have clear lines. So, for the time being, he chose not to push any further because he definitely didn't want to make things awkward.

Die took the moment to pull the drawer open, grabbing lube and then quickly slicking his dick up with it. He left his fingers coated in it and made a quick decision. He stepped behind the other and took the back of his head, forcefully pushing it down, as if to smother Kyo in the bedding, waiting for him to either try to fight back or tap out of it.

Kyo listened to the distinct, slick sound of Die lubing his cock and smirked into the sheets, anticipation making him push his hips out a bit, very eager for Die to fuck him. He wasn't expecting to be pushed into the bed like that though and started struggling almost immediately, though he gave no indication of wanting out of it.

Die just stood behind him, keeping his head down, pushing it harder down the more Kyo struggled. There was something about the moment that was almost frightening, Die's hand shoving Kyo into the bed, his stance wide, cock hard, and his breathing elevated. But most of all, it was the calm look on his face that was nearly startling, the cold sort of calm that settled over him as he did it.

And, in the end, it was that feeling that make him release Kyo, realizing how close to all sorts of bottled up anger he truly was... and none of it for Kyo. Finally, he realized the reason why he'd been so hesitant to take this position and why the desire to just backhand his lover had been so strong.

He knelt behind Kyo and roughly wiped his lube covered fingers over his entrance, shoving them in for a moment before moving them back out and replacing them with his cock in a mere few seconds.

The need to breathe had gotten almost too great for Kyo, and he was about to tap out when Die finally released him. He barely had time to draw in a soft gasp of air before it was being pushed out in a groan as the other's fingers shoved into him only to be replaced with his cock. The stretch burned a minimal amount, and Kyo couldn't help pushing back into it, desperation overtaking him.

Die didn't waste any time at all, grasping Kyo's shoulder and starting to fuck him hard and fast, the sound of skin slapping against skin overwhelming the room. He closed his eyes and sank into it, allowing fantasy to override reality; just the feeling of his cock mattering and nothing beyond that.

Kyo moaned as Die started fucking him, his hands moving to grip the sheets. The way he was being fucked pushed his dick against the bed, and he readily rutted against it even as Die thrust into him.

Eventually Die reached to grab Kyo's hand, wrenching his arm behind his back and then a moment later, doing the same to the other. It took him a few moments, but finally he pulled them straight back and began to use them for leverage to drive into Kyo even harder, panting with the effort it was taking.

Kyo grunted when Die grabbed his hand, then outright cried out as he grabbed the other. He arched his back some, moaning out almost repeatedly as Die fucked him so harshly.

Die didn't speak to him, didn't even act like he existed except as a place to put his cock in for the time being. When he came, it was fast, and he just filled Kyo up with it, pulling out for the last bit to shoot over his ass, and then let go of him, shifting himself to his feet and moving away. He folded his arms over his chest and stood there, staring at Kyo and waiting to see if he'd move.

The way Die was going at him had Kyo nearly desperate to cum and when he felt Die cum inside him then over his ass, he thought his relief was next. However, Die moved away somewhere, and Kyo laid there, rock hard, panting slightly before finally turning his head a fraction of an inch to see Die from the corner of his eye. He huffed and squirmed against the bed, his cock rubbing against the sheets, desperate for the friction.

"Stop moving," Die instructed quietly. And then he leaned forward, taking a step toward Kyo and spitting out, "You're just a hole to fuck, no more than a sex doll." He grabbed Kyo's hair and yanked. "In fact, you're worse! Don't even follow instructions well!"

Kyo stilled instantly though with some amount of difficulty. Die's words, cruel though they were, sent shivers running down his spine. He let out a small whine when his hair was pulled, the look on his face one of shame for being so worthless.

Die's mouth pressed against Kyo's ear as he hissed out, "I'd rather be fucking a doll." Shifiting his stance, he then shoved Kyo over onto the floor, following down aftter him and pinning his hands against the floor, his knee pressing up dangerously against his balls. "Filthy!"

Kyo let out an oomph when he was shoved to the floor, almost immediately struggling when Die pinned his hands there and pressed his knees to his balls. He turned his head to the side and bit out a quiet, "Fuck you," his teeth clenched tightly.

Die actually leaned down in his face and screamed out, "Shut up!" remaining there afterward, not moving back a single inch just to leave Kyo more intimidated.

Kyo's eyes widened as he stared up at Die before he finally closed them. When they opened again, his expression was one of pure submission, his body actually relaxing against the floor.

"That's more like it," Die returned, still barking it into Kyo's face. He patted his cheek a bit harshly, though not anything that would even hurt. Pulling back, he studied him for a few moments and then reached down and twisted a nipple for no apparent reason other than to hurt him.

Kyo shivered then cried out at the nipple twist, his hips involuntarily jerking up. He was so hard it hurt, his cock weeping pre-cum at this point, his balls tight against his body.

Die spanked his hand down over the nipple a few times and then ran the edge of one nail down over his body, avoiding tattoos, but making a line for his dick. Once there, he did the same to his cock, knowing it would be sensitive and probably hurt like a son of a bitch. But he wondered if it wouldn't send Kyo over the edge, to feel pain there.

Kyo moaned as Die's hand slapped over his nipple, his back arching slightly. He dug his hands into the carpet, wanting so badly to move around as Die scratched him, the pain pushing another sound of pleasure from him. When that pain continued onto his cock, however, he cried out and very nearly did lose it, a large bead of pre-cum pushing out and rolling down the side of his dick. "A-ah...please...," he whimpered quietly, his hips twisting a bit as he fought to remain still.

Die grabbed his dick harshly and none-too-gently jacked him off, making sure to seem annoyed by it, like it was the last thing in the world he wanted to do.

Kyo drew in a sharp intake of breath and by the time he released it, he was cumming, hard. A harsh scream ripped from his throat as his hips snapped up into Die's hand, his cum spurting out in copious amounts all the way up to his collarbone. Even when he'd stopped cumming, he was still humping up into Die's hand before he finally collapsed against the floor, trembling slightly. His eyes were glazed over, his lips parted as he panted, his fingers curling and uncurling against the floor.

Die finished him off and then leaned over, hissing out, "Filthy and disgusting," before letting go of his dick and just staring him for a minute, waiting on any other reaction.

Kyo lay there panting, flinching at Die's words. He bit his lip then released it, a tinge of blood across the top of it. He wasn't sure if Die was finished with him so he stayed still, a few tremors going through him.

Die let the moment extend for a few more seconds and then placed his hand on Kyo's thigh, lightly tapping his fingers three times, distinctly separated, before leaning in and kissing him hard. His hand came up to cup his cheek, gently stroking it as he kissed him.

The very moment Die tapped his thigh, Kyo's arms came up around his neck, clinging to him hard. He started shivering and couldn't stop as he kissed Die back, flushing darkly when a few tears tracked down his face.

The guitarist had to fight back the words that wanted to come up, the apologies he narrowly avoided saying when their lips parted. He held Kyo against him, moving them so that he was sitting up and Kyo was pulled into his lap. He pushed Kyo's pants away so he'd be more comfortable and cradled him in his arms, stroking over his hair and rocking them gently back and forth.

Kyo curled tightly into Die's arms, clinging tightly to him as they rocked. He couldn't even explain why he was reacting the way he was, but more tears spilled out as he buried his face against Die's chest. Finally, the shivering stopped, and he took a deep breath, tilting his head up to find Die's lips once more, just wanting the connection.

Die's lips met Kyo's own, his movements gentle and his hands never ceasing their movements, caressing and soothing as they moved. Everything about his touch was like an apology for what he'd just done, though he never said a single word about it.

Kyo shifted a bit, moving his hand to stroke through Die's hair, silently letting him know that everything was okay. In fact, everything was blissfully wonderful with him right then, and he sincerely hoped that Die was on the same level he was.

As soon as he broke the kiss, he nuzzled himself up under Kyo's jaw and closed his eyes, trying to sense if Kyo was okay... if he could have his moment that he definitely needed now or not. But he still wasn't sure what sort of Dom would need to even take the time like this in the end, and he honestly felt worried about how Kyo would react to him needing it. Some part of him wanted to bolt to the bathroom and have himself a good breakdown over the sink. But the more rational part told him his job was to be there for Kyo right then, and he could freak out later. Far later....

When Die nuzzled under his neck, he pressed his lips to his hair and stroked his cheek. After a moment, his demeanor changed back to more of himself, and he uncurled slightly.

Finally, he spoke, his voice barely a whisper against Die's ear. "It's okay, baby..."

Die wasn't sure which way to take what Kyo said, but in the end he took it to mean that Kyo was okay now. He kissed his cheek and did his damnedest to put on the face he knew was expected, tucking the rest back for later like he always did with anything stressful or that he just didn't know how to deal with. He pressed one more kiss to Kyo's lips before patting him. "Let's get you cleaned up."

Kyo peered at his lover then smiled softly, shaking his head as he cupped Die's face. "Daisuke, darling, I know you're not quite okay yet...and it's okay that you're not."

For a moment, Die gritted his teeth, fighting against the raging of emotions in him. And then he gave in, leaning back and doing his best to breathe as he ran his hands over Kyo's arms. He fought the tears as best he could, but the more he held them back, the more they stung until finally, he closed his eyes, the hot tracks running down his cheeks, his hands shaking slightly as he kept rubbing them over Kyo's arms.

Kyo watched as the guitarist started to lose it. He reached up and pushed his fingers through Die's hair a few times before pulling his head back down, holding him tightly. "Shh...," he murmured, kissing the top of Die's head, letting out a slightly shaky breath of his own. "I love you."

Die tucked himself against Kyo and then pulled him in tight, just holding him hard against his body, finally managing to get out a shaky, "I don't think you're worthless, or anything of what I said... o-okay?"

Kyo could not stop the trembling of his lower lip at Die's admission, and he just nodded before whispering out, "I know, baby...I know..." He held tight to his lover, stroking his hair, his face and his back, soothing him as best as he could. Die's hand slipped up into Kyo's hair, holding on tight as he kissed him roughly on the cheek and then tucked himself back down, closing his eyes and just waiting on the horrible feeling in his gut to pass.

Kyo took several deep breaths, finding his calm again and just holding onto Die. He continually stroked and kissed him, occasionally murmuring softly to him.

After a few more moments, Die breathed out, "Talk to me about it... I need you to, please."

Kyo nodded and repositioned himself a bit. "It was honestly nearly cathartic for me..." He paused, considering his words carefully, his hand coming up to stroke gently over Die's chest. "I could sense your anger, though...and I know it wasn't directed at me...but I felt that I might've pushed you a little too far in that direction for my own gain." His tone was apologetic, and he kissed Die's cheek after he spoke. "And believe me, love, anything said in scene isn't taken seriously...though I know there's a delicate balance there..."

Die gave a small nod and then sniffed, moving one hand up to almost wipe his face and then stopping, realizing he had no clean hands left. Instead, he just sank back against Kyo and took in a shuttering breath. "I know I... I..." he shook his head, his throat tightening up at the thought of even admitting how close to a line he'd come.

He took a moment, breathing through it, and then offered as soft, "I almost hit you... everything in me wanted to lash out at you, backhand the ever living shit out of you. But I didn't... I held it back. And I'm scared, Kyo... I'm terrified of why I wanted that."

Kyo reached up to wipe Die's face for him then petted his hair some more. He kissed the side of Die's head and nodded. "I know. I could tell, and part of me wanted you to...but......why did you want to? What terrified you?"

"Anger," Die breathed out, "So much anger... just bottled up and never let out, always hidden behind the smiles and the calm looks. But it's in there... it's in there somewhere, and this touches it, and that scares the fuck out of me." He blinked back new tears and shook his head, pursing his lips a bit. "Not at you... the anger isn't at you."

Kyo licked his lip and nodded, having thought as much. "I have read before that sessions like these can seriously help get out aggressions from everyday life..." He hugged Die tightly then quirked his lips up in a tiny smile. "Want me to roleplay as Kaoru so you can take it out on the great Liida-sama?" he asked, hoping to get at least a little smile from Die.

Die did manage a little half smile and then shook his head a little, tilting his head back against the wall again and just breathing for a moment. "It's not a bad thing to get it out then? I just feel like a horrible human being... like I'm twisted for even thinking some of the shit I was. And I hate even more that I ruin it for you afterward by having to talk about it... for admitting how I felt. It's supposed to help you, not make you feel like I'm a spoiled brat."

Kyo breathed out a soft laughed, grasping Die's face with both his hand and pulled it down so he could kiss him gently. "You are a spoiled brat, Koi...I love you just the same." He released him then shook his head. "It's fine that you're...venting. You don't nearly enough anyway..."

Die's lips pursed for a moment and then relaxed. "Did I overstep my bounds anywhere tonight?"

Kyo thought on for a few moments then shook his head. "Not that's coming to mind at the moment, but I promise to mention it if it does, okay?"

"And... if I had..." Die took a shaky breath, "slapped you around like I wanted to... would that have been violating what you told me not to do?"

Kyo shook his head. "No, I mean...so long as you don't break something in the process...slapping is okay…" He paused and ducked his head a little. "Particularly if I'm resisting..."

Die nodded a little and then leaned forward, sighing softly and then breathing out a quiet, "I feel like a tool... I wanted it so bad. Like going into it there was no way I wanted anything like that, it horrified me to even think of hurting you that much. But once I was there... it was different, and I think that's what scares me the most. That something that normally makes me cringe had me going absolutely crazy."

Kyo nodded a bit, leaning in to press his face against Die's neck. "You don't really know how the scene is going to affect you until you're there..."

"Shower... I need the water... I guess I need to feel like it's rinsing away some of my ugly emotions... crazy as that sounds."

Kyo hummed and kissed Die's neck before easing himself from his lap, standing and holding out his hand for the other.

Die pulled himself up and then pushed his pants down the rest of the way, stepping over them and keeping hold of Kyo's hand, wandering off toward the bathroom.

Kyo lead Die into the bathroom and over to the shower, reaching in to turn the water on with his free hand. He stood there a moment while it heated then gently tugged Die into the shower with him.

Not once did Die let go of Kyo's hand, clutching tightly to it even once they were in the shower. He stood under the water with his eyes closed, just breathing, seeming to almost go into a trance-like state after a few minutes, the water pouring over his entire body, even down his face, plastering his red hair everywhere.

Kyo watched Die carefully, his mind swirling with his own thoughts. He shifted quietly and turned the water up a degree then switched it over to their rain shower. He stood under that, holding firmly to Die's hand, finally closing his own eyes as he leaned against the wall.

When it changed, Die seemed to relax, easing himself down from the tense way he had been holding his body to something more like his usual self. He moved in to gently lean against Kyo, kissing over his neck and then gently nipping his earlobe. He wasn't trying to initiate sex, but rather intimacy and something in him showed as much, his actions gentle and his hands careful not to arouse, but to touch.

Kyo shifted to allow Die to lean against him, his arms coming up to slip around the taller's waist. He stroked Die's skin with his thumbs, his head tilting to the side to allow access to his neck.

Die’s lips ghosted over the flesh that was obviously exposed to him. He breathed out gently over Kyo's skin and then licked the area, tasting the mixture of Kyo and the fresh, warm water from the taps. "I love you," he whispered softly.

Kyo sighed softly, reaching up to cup the back of Die's neck lightly. "Mm, I love you, too, my Koi." He ran his hand down Die's back, gently caressing his butt.

"Mmm... you mean the world to me, and you're the biggest positive in my life." Which honestly said something, given that Die had devoted everything to the band for years and years of his life, walking away from so many other things just to make things go right with the band.

Kyo's throat tightened at those words and he had to grit his teeth hard to keep himself under control. After a few moments, he shifted and crushed Die to him tightly, murmuring out in a shaky tone, "You are my everything."

"Love of my life... the glue that keeps me together... my sanity in many cases," Die murmured against Kyo's shoulder, licking over the skin again, enjoying the mix of the water and Kyo's own taste.

Kyo felt truly overcome with the emotions Die was pouring out, finding himself even unsure of what to say. It wasn't a contest, after all, so he settled for stroking Die's hair. "...ditto..." he uttered out finally, feeling a little lame but not wanting Die to get the wrong idea or something.

The guitarist gave it a few more minutes, just holding Kyo and then finally pried himself away from him, biting his lip and then flushing a bit, but not apologizing like he once might have.

Kyo looked up at Die when he pulled away, watching his face. He reached up and pushed a few strands of hair back then leaned up on his tiptoes, kissing his lover slowly and softly.

Die kissed him back eagerly for a few moments and then ended it, smiling a bit at Kyo, most of his usual demeanor back in place.

Kyo finally smiled. "You're beautiful...stay that way."

Soaping up a sponge, Die handed it over and then pulled his own down to clean off as well. "Are you okay? Honestly? Last time I ask."

Kyo took the sponge and began washing himself, nodding in confirmation. "Yes, love, I'm fine..." He offered Die a small smile for reassurance before he really got into washing himself.

"Good. I'm okay now." Die began rubbing the sponge over him, smiling to himself a bit as he washed.

"I'm glad," Kyo replied, finishing up washing and moving more under the spray to rinse off. He made quick work of shampooing and conditioning his hair, the process not taking long at all since his hair was still fairly short. Once he was done, he moved under the spray once more and simply stood there, letting the water sluice over him.

Die did his fastest version of a shower after that, his shorter hair proving for quicker showers than he'd once managed, and then got out, drying off and starting to blow-dry his hair while he waited on Kyo.

Kyo stayed under the spray a few moments longer after Die got out, essentially centering and grounding himself emotionally. After he was done, he cut the water off and stepped out, grabbing up a towel to pat himself off with. He scrubbed the towel over his head then tossed it in the hamper, padding nude over to Die and wrapping his arms around his waist, kissing his shoulder.

Die shifted a bit and quickly moved one hand to Kyo's hair, blow-drying the short locks until they were dry before grinning and kissing the top of his head. He moved back to his own.

Kyo chuckled and leaned into the warm air while it was there then just resettled against Die's back, closing his eyes.

Die chuckled as he finished up getting his hair from super wet to just damp, finally turning off the dryer. He didn't like to have to use it, but he didn't want to drip everywhere tonight. He grabbed the mouthwash and his toothbrush, quickly going ahead and starting to get his mouth clean for the night. "You know... I actually really liked just wiping the lube over you and thrusting in."

Kyo turned to look at Die and grinned, moving to follow suit on brushing his teeth. Before he jammed his toothbrush in his mouth, he licked his lips and nodded. "I kinda did, too ..."

Die flushed a little and got busy with his teeth. Once he was done, he rinsed out and then used a little water, the mint always a bit much for him in full, and then padded off toward the bathroom, scooping up Snowball as he went.

Kyo quickly brushed then rinsed his mouth out, following along behind Die to the bedroom. He gave Snowball an ear scritching on his way by, going to the bed and flopping down on it, not bothering with pants or underwear.

Die placed Snowball on the end of the bed and then crawled up next to Kyo, rolling over next to him and curling up as he tugged the covers into place. "Okay, best part?"

Kyo shifted down and curl up against Die, flopping his arm over his side, thinking. "Mmm, when you were going at it hard and I could barely think...as cliché as it sounds..."

"Good," Die laughed softly, "that's the easy part." He chuckled a bit.

Kyo grinned and leaned in to kiss Die. "Indeed..."


	69. Chapter 69

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

For the past week, Die had been honestly more than a little bit out of sorts. Recording had him stressed out and a freak cold had pulled him down for the better part of the week prior. At least the cold had gone, but that hadn't left him in better shape. Rather, he had managed several near misses in the panic attack department - all outside of Kyo's eyes, of course - and a few other incidents he wasn't proud of either.

All in all, Die was having a hell of a fucking week, and it was only getting progressively worse. Kaoru had spent the day riding their asses at work, taking out what Die could only assume was his own issues on the pretense of them doing things wrong. It was human to fuck up sometimes, but Kaoru wasn't letting up on the nagging long enough to share that fact with them either.

Now, on the way home, Die nearly passed out on the train ride back, his car having had a flat in the parking lot, and he didn't feel like dealing with it at all. He was hungry and upset... and maybe just a bit on the verge of some angry tears, though he staunchly hid those back behind everything else like a good manly man. He'd called in pizza on the way from the station to their house, refusing to have to put either of them through cooking tonight and now he just flung his stuff down and hurried into the bathroom, already opening his pants before he ever got to the door.

Kyo had weathered the week much better than Die, mostly because he'd only had to be in the studio twice. He had spent the rest of his time out taking care of Sukekiyo business, including some photoshoots and promotions. He'd left before Die, taking a taxi to a meeting then heading home. He'd been there about an hour when he heard Die come in, perplexed because he'd not heard the other's car pull up. 

Stepping into the front hall from the living room, he opened his mouth to greet his lover but shut it when Die rushed into the bathroom without saying anything. The vocalist hitched an eyebrow up then shrugged, turning to tidy Die's things up. He moved to sit back on the couch, waiting for the other to come out.

Die yanked at his pants almost desperately, the zipper stuck halfway down and then let out a string of curse words his mother would have had his hide for, finally just shoving his pants down, the zipper stuck in what amounted to his favorite pair of underwear somehow, and leaned over the toilet just in time. He stood there with his eyes closed for a minute, not even feeling his usual slide of arousal at his near miss, more upset than anything.

Kyo heard the cursing and his eyebrows shot up again, a frown working its way onto his face. He sighed quietly and stood, tapping lightly on the door. "Die? Are you okay?"

"Zipper stuck..." he just stopped there, trying to pull himself back together. He knew things were more stressful for Kyo with juggling Sukekiyo and everything else, and honestly he just didn't want to be a burden. Finishing up, he shook off and flushed, tugging everything back up and then trying to get the damn zipper unstuck. "Fucking... I swear to God, can you fix this somehow?"

Kyo winced in sympathy, knowing how annoying that could be. "That sucks." He was about to step away from the bathroom again when Die asked if he could fix it. "Yeah, probably..." Opening the bathroom door, he moved into the room and flipped the toilet lid down. "C'mere," he requested softly.

Die closed his eyes for a moment, centering himself as Kyo came in, and then moved to stand in front of him, gesturing at his underwear. "Try... not to rip them... yeah?"

Kyo tsked softly and reached out to grasp Die's pants, pulling him a bit closer, then going to work on the zipper. Within a few moments, he had it unstuck, patient fingers realigning the teeth. "There; only a tiny snag."

Die's shoulders sagged as if he'd just come down off of a giant heap of shit. He took Kyo's hand and pressed a kiss to his knuckles. "Thank you." He moved to adjust himself then and buckle his belt back up before going to wash off his hands. "So I ordered pizza... I hope that's okay."

Kyo smiled and stood up, stroking his hand over Die's back as he slid by. "Pizza sounds great. I couldn't think of anything easy to fix for tonight, and I figured we were both sick of convenience store food."

"More than a little," Die admitted softly, drying his hands off and then following Kyo out. He went right to the liquor cabinet, not even thinking about how much his actions showed as he poured himself four fingers of whiskey and then capped the bottle, going to plunk down on the couch just after. "Car's got a flat. Left it at work."

A small look of concern flickered over Kyo's face when Die went for the whiskey. It was something he hadn't seen his lover do in quite some time. He sighed quietly and settled next to the guitarist, his feet tucked under him. "Oh, that explains why I didn't hear you drive up. Why didn't you call? I could've come and got you..."

"Wasn't sure if you were done with the stuff for Sukekiyo, and I didn't want to interrupt." He winced slightly at the tone in his voice, the way he seemed to almost give away something under it all; and he hated even more that it wasn't really how he felt, just the frustration of everything else shining through in all the wrong ways. He pinched his nose and then breathed out, "I'm just frustrated with the car... and then the zipper. I'm not having a good day." Yeah... sure... day.

Kyo bit his tongue for a moment then shook his head, reaching over to put his hand on Die's knee. "I can see that...but you do know that part of being in a relationship is helping each other out...right? I mean, you come first, period."

Die nodded and then murmured quietly, "Yeah, but it's a new thing, and I don't want to fuck it up for you. It's fine... I got home... I just underestimated how many people would decide today was the day to end it all on the damn line, I guess."

Kyo clucked his tongue then shifted closer to Die, slipping his arm around his shoulders. "Yeah..." He didn't know what else to say at the moment, just hating that Die was in such a foul mood.

Die downed his whiskey and then started to open his mouth when the doorbell rang. He grunted and gestured. "Pizza I guess."

The vocalist nodded and stood up, going to peer out of the side window before opening the door. He paid for the pizza, thanked the delivery guy then turned and walked back into the living room. He debated for a moment before plopping the box down on the coffee table. "We'll just eat in here," he announced, heading into the kitchen to retrieve sodas for the both of them as well as paper plates and some napkins. Once he returned, he settled on the couch and passed Die a plate and his drink before opening up the pizza box and getting himself a rather large piece. "Looks good..."

Die reached for the box, shoving it open and finding himself grateful it at least was the right kind. He retrieved a slice and was halfway through it by the time the other came back with a plate for him. He took it and pushed the slice onto it, the tip hanging off so he could nibble his way up on it as he slid it along the plate.

Kyo watched the way Die enthusiastically ate, quirking his lips up in a smile before going to town on his own slice. He finished his off relatively quickly then grabbed another, chomping into it. After a minute, he swallowed his bite and reached for his soda, taking a swig then sighing. "This is really good. They only finger food at the meeting, and I skipped lunch to make it there on time."

Die made a face and then sighed. "Yeah well... feel good you bailed early on Kaoru today. He's taking his personal issues out by screaming at everyone again." He wrinkled his nose a bit and then sighed. "Or we just all suck as much as he says. Who knows."

Kyo turned to Die and groaned. "Great, are he and Toshiya fighting or what? I thought they were doing good..." He made a mental note to get a few minutes alone with the bassist to see if he could glean any information from him.

Shrugging, Die grabbed another piece and began shoving it down. In between bites, he muttered out, "Fuck if I know; I got the short end of the stick today. Lucky me."

Kyo hummed around his bite, finally finishing up his slice. He washed it down then turned to grab Die's hand, kissing it softly. "I'm sorry, baby, that really sucks."

"Life," Die returned before he shoved in even more pizza, reaching for a third slice in quick succession. He didn't even slow down between them, just launching into the next one.

Kyo blinked at the way Die was going at the pizza. He cleared his throat and laughed a little. "Hungry?"

Die just gave a little nod, though he didn't make any comment about it and the nod was barely there. He just pushed through the entire piece of pizza and then grabbed another one.

Kyo frowned, knowing that if Die continued to eat, he would be sick and moaning all through the night. He sighed and finally reached out, grabbing Die's plate away from him. "Die...you haven't even stopped to taste your food..."

Die made a little face when Kyo took his plate from him and then just sighed, flopping back against the chair and wetting his lips. He pursed his lips slightly before shrugging.

The vocalist was growing a bit frustrated with Die's attitude. He was behaving as though more had happened that just a bad day. He tossed the plate down on the table and looked at Die, eyebrow raised. "I'm sorry; I just really don't want you being sick all night..."

"Yeah... I get it," Die returned as quietly as he could manage, crossing one leg over the other and then checking his watch very very quickly, the action almost unnoticeable. His eyes flicked back up to the TV that wasn't even on, sniffing a bit and reaching to turn it on.

Kyo just sighed and shifted away, standing up to clean up their mess and put the leftovers away. When he'd done that, he came back and sat on the couch once more, peering at the TV. "Do you want to watch a movie or something?"

Die flicked to the list, mostly to check the time, but pretended to look through the options. "It's sort of in between things starting, so either a partial or a DVD it is."

Kyo huffed and shrugged, gesturing to the TV. "Just put it on the news for now then...or wherever..."

The channel changed and then Die put the remove down between them, his finger nervously tapping on the edge of the couch. Thirteen minutes and counting. Two more and that was it.

Kyo missed Die's tapping, having started to pay attention to the news. He shifted a bit and leaned back, his feet propped on the coffee table. "Can you believe they're tearing that building down?" he commented, having nothing else to say at the moment.

"I think it was damaged in the last quake or something?" Die wasn't entirely sure but he was more worried about the time. He got to sixty seconds in his head a second time and then stood up, skirting around the back of the couch and heading for the stairs, taking them two at a time.

"Maybe...hey, where are you going?" Kyo called out, utterly perplexed by Die's sudden exit. He sat there for a moment then pursed his lips, realization dawning on him. He sighed and silently cursed Kaoru for pushing Die's mood to this point. 

He didn't follow his lover upstairs; instead he stood and went into the kitchen again, retrieving a bottle of water. He set it on the counter then went out putting food out for the cats, refilling their bowl and feeding the bunny. Once he'd done all that and Die still hadn't returned, he went ahead and started cleaning out the litter boxes, grumbling to himself about stinky animals and such.

Die made his way upstairs and into the bathroom, still counting seconds. He closed the door and locked it, tugged his shirt off over his head, and then reached to turn on the shower. Lifting the toilet lid, he settled down on the floor in front of the toilet and closed his eyes, finishing the count to sixty before leaning over and forcing himself to gag.

The first few times, nothing came up, but the third, everything reversed as he emptied everything he'd just eaten right back out. He kept it up until there was nothing but stomach acid burning his mouth and then finally sat back, quietly flushing the toilet and then cleaning up the area, more because he was concerned he'd leave some evidence than anything else.

Standing, he flushed the toilet once more and then went to brush his teeth, spraying some air freshener and then stripping off completely. He double-checked that everything was exactly how it'd been before and then shoved his pants off, quietly unlocking the door and then stepping into the shower, quickly wetting his hair and starting to scrub off in super-fast mode so it'd seem logical he'd been in here this long.

Downstairs, Kyo could hear the shower turn on, the sound of water going through pipes obvious in the kitchen. It only confirmed his suspicions, and he sighed, moving to wash his hands. He headed up the stairs and into their bedroom, settling on the edge of the bed to wait for Die, knowing he was going to have to confront him and get down to whatever was really bothering him.

Die sped through the first part of his shower and then meandered through the rest of it, finally getting himself clean. He did a quick shave job and then paused, his shoulders slumping as his head bowed as he let out everything that had been hurting him. The first few hot tears tracked down his face, and he forced himself to turn around and lift his face up toward the spray of the water, pretending this wasn't happening, that he wasn't betraying everything and falling into old pits. Pretending he wasn't crying in the shower alone, poor Kyo abandoned downstairs thinking god only knew what.

A few minutes passed before he finally washed his face off completely and then turned off the water and moved to towel himself off, slicking out his hair and then wrapping his towel around his waist. He took his time applying moisturizer and blow-drying his hair before he spritzed on a bit of cologne and sniff-checked the bathroom to make sure it didn't smell of vomit. Sure he'd covered his tracks, he hitched the towel up a bit more and grabbed his dirty clothing, exiting the bathroom and making his way into the bedroom.

Surprise filtered across his face when he found Kyo there, though he just dumped his shirt and underwear into the hamper and began removing things from his pants pockets, holding up his phone. "Good news is I can stop using the old piece of shit; got this in this morning at least." As if it hadn't taken long enough since the breaking of his old one.

Kyo hummed quietly then crossed his arms, peering at Die. "Suddenly decided to have a shower...?"

"Yeah." Die shrugged a bit. "Sometimes just... gets the stress out." He had a sinking sensation he was caught, but some part of him just couldn't outright say it, couldn't admit how weak he was.

Kyo licked his lips and stood, moving directly in front of Die and sniffing lightly. "You know, you've never been as good at hiding things as you think. You always give yourself away in some manner..."

Die froze then, closing his eyes and just pursing his lips for a moment before sighing and bowing his head. He pushed his hands down over the towel and swallowed, waiting on it.

The vocalist watched the way Die deflated and hated it. He sighed and reached out, pressing his palm against his lover's chest. "Why, baby? You've come so incredibly far...Stop trying to shoulder all of your burdens alone, and it won't get to this point. I know you worry about bugging me, but do it anyway." He pulled away then, stepping back slightly to give Die breathing room and an escape path should he need it.

The muscles in Die's jaw worked for a moment before he sighed and skirted around Kyo, going to sit on the bed, drawing one leg up, the other hanging off as he made sure his towel was still in place for the time being. 

"I fucked up... twice. It's not a full-blown thing." He reached one trembling hand to push through his hair and then sighed, shaking his head and then gazing down at his lap. "I don't know why I fucked up; I just did."

Kyo shifted out of the way then turned around to face Die, nodding slightly. "Okay then, what triggered it?"

"Stress... I don't know. I just... found myself in the bathroom the other day when you left early and," he made a little motion, not wanting to say it. Some part of his mind clicked about it, and he realized what was going on, but there was no way in hell he was voicing it, a bitter hatred for his own mind sweeping through him in the next few seconds.

Kyo sighed and nodded, finally stepping closer to Die and pushed his hand through his slightly damp hair. "Daisuke, darling, you know I am here, and always will be...even if you don't want to talk about it..."

Die reached out for him, hooking him closer and then burying his face in his chest. It took him a few moments, but finally he offered a quiet, "I'm jealous... and I'm upset that I am... and Kaoru's making my life a living hell, and I still can't figure out that fucking solo... and then on top of that, the shit like my phone and the tire, and there's some new stalker bitch trying to follow me around, and I just... can't deal."

Kyo wrapped his arms around Die, stroking over his hair. He sighed quietly, standing there for a few moments before quietly responding. "You let everything pile up and eat at you instead of taking it one thing at a time..."

Die nodded a little, fighting down his emotions before they ate away at his soul. After a few more moments, he finally murmured, "I'm sorry that I'm jealous... it's stupid and it's pointless, and I hate that I am. I want nothing but the best for you, and I support everything you're doing with a full heart and open arms. I just..." he pressed his face harder into Kyo's stomach, the next part coming out a little choked. "Sometimes I see the things people suspect... the way they think we're all aiming toward a breakup, and it fucking kills me. I hate them for having doubt.... and I hate them more for sharing it with me."

Kyo gritted his teeth hard as Die spoke. His hands stilled, and he sighed, shaking his head. "Die...this band is not going anywhere. You know that these side projects are just that, side projects." He pulled away and tilted Die's face up. "We discussed this for a reason...I needed your blessing to carry on with this..."

Die studied him for a minute before closing his eyes and tugging Kyo even closer if that was even possible. "I know, and trust me, you still have it. But sometimes... we don't control the little green fuckhead inside, do we?" 

Kyo licked his lips, shaking his head. "No, we don't..." 

Die leaned his head forward and then whispered, "I miss it... I miss doing the shows, and I miss writing music on the side... and I'm angry that mine failed. And I'm angry at Kaoru for taking out shit on us that isn't our fault or our problem and pretending like it is. And I'm mad at myself for falling back into the same old traps, and I hate myself for feeling any of the ways I do... and it's the worst fucking cycle in the entire world."

Kyo listened to Die, his heart aching for his lover. He didn't know what to say. He'd always been horrible at finding the right words to say, and now wasn't an exception. He stroked Die's back with one hand while practically hugging his head with the other. "It's...we'll get you back on track..."

Die just gave a little nod and then whispered out, "Don't let me fail... don't let me fail _us_. I love you, and if I fuck us up... god... I don't know what I'll do." With that tears stared to slide down his cheeks, the anxiety he'd been holding as close to at bay as he could finally spilling over as he broke down, letting out a broken sob against Kyo's shirt.

A little piece of Kyo broke with Die as his lover started sobbing. He swallowed hard and hugged him tightly, nearly to the point of suffocation. "Die, I don't know how many times I have to tell you....but something like this is not going to fuck us up...." He finally pulled away, but only long enough to move to the bed, sitting on it then gathering Die in his arms. "I love you unconditionally."

Die abandoned all pretense in the instant that Kyo settled on the bed, crawling over him and settling astride his lap, pressing his face against Kyo's neck and clinging to him hard, trying his best to stuff the panic back into the box it was attempting to escape from. "I love you... I love you more than words or anything else could ever ever express."

Kyo's arms held fast around his lover, his face turning to press gentle kisses to Die's cheek. He eventually shifted to push his fingers through Die's hair, pulling him back enough to kiss his lips softly.

Something changed the moment Kyo's lips touched Die's, and an instant later, Die had his hand on the back of Kyo's neck, his tongue already pressing for entrance into the other's mouth as he drew himself up to a bit more of his actual height rather than hunching over, forcing Kyo to tilt his head back slightly to kiss him.

Kyo couldn't stop the groan that escaped as Die pushed the kiss the next level quickly. He hadn't meant for it to go there, but he immediately knew why and was quick to shift himself for Die, his head leaning back. Die kissed Kyo in a way that told of just how much he needed, that screamed of the need for reassurance and the reminder of adoration.

Kyo sucked Die's tongue into his mouth, his hands moving to roam over his body, caressing his skin lovingly. After a moment, he broke the kiss long enough to flip them over so that Die was beneath him. He instantly locked lips with his lover once more, the new position giving him more area to explore with his hands.

There wasn't a single ounce of resistance in Die when Kyo moved them. He just melted back into the bed, one arm tossed above his head, the other holding lightly onto Kyo's shoulder.

It wasn't long before Kyo had his face pressed against Die's neck, kissing and licking the skin there as he gripped his hip, rubbing lightly with his thumb. Finally, he pulled up to look at Die's face, bringing his hand to cup his cheek. murmuring, "You're gorgeous."

Die looked up at him, his lips parting for a moment, a protest written all over his face, the words of how he'd messed up and how horrible he really looked right then wanting to come up. But after a few moments, the words died before they ever made it to this tongue, the realization that sometimes he wouldn't be perfect, that sometimes gorgeous didn't just mean if he looked rested and not like he'd just thrown up all of his dinner on purpose. Sometimes... gorgeous meant something else. Relaxation slid over his features and a second later, he tugged Kyo down ever so gently, his lips touching Kyo's for a moment before he whispered, "You always know what I need to hear...."

Kyo smiled softly, brushing his fingers through Die's hair. "Of course..." He gave a very light chuckle then pressed their lips together once more. "I could spend days worshiping you in every way possible."

"I'll give you a compromise... half an hour." He smirked up at Kyo and then full-on grinned. "I'm a bit more realistic on time constraints."

Kyo chuckled and shook his head, nipping Die's bottom lip. "Half an hour? That's kind of a tight time frame for worshipping..." He shifted and nuzzled against Die's neck, his hand stroking over Die's hip and along his stomach before brushing over his thigh.

Die breathed out a soft laugh, but he pressed his face against Kyo's shoulder again anyway. "However long you want, baby... but I have one favor to ask... make love to me first?"

The vocalist smiled against his lover's skin, nodding his head. "Of course..." He pressed a few kisses to Die's neck again then started trailing downward, flicking his tongue over his collarbone then back up over his Adam's apple. He took a few moments to suck at the protrusion before shifting down to lightly kiss Die's chest, pausing at a nipple to suckle the bud into his mouth.

Die shifted back in Kyo's lap a little, giving the other a bit more room to work with, his hand gently in Kyo's short blonde hair, his eyelids at half-mast, his lower lip between his teeth ever so gently.

Kyo moved to Die's other nipple, giving it the same treatment before lifting his head and kissing Die again. He pulled back and licked his lips. "Lie on your stomach for me," he requested quietly, his hand rubbing Die's side.

Without question, Die moved to lie down on the bed, sort of sinking down into the softness of the comforter. He grabbed a fistful and tugged it closer to himself, closing his eyes.

Kyo moved then to spread Die's legs slightly so he could kneel between them. He leaned down over his lover's back and began trailing kisses and nips down his spine, his hand wandering over whatever skin he could reach.

The guitarist shifted a bit, reaching under himself to untie the towel and push it out from under himself, though it was still over his ass. "Leave it there," he murmured quietly into the bed. Somehow it just made it feel better to him like that.

Kyo offered a quiet hum by way of response as he worked his way down Die's spine. He reached his tail bone and pressed a kiss there before shifting the towel out of the way to lightly caress and kiss Die's cheeks before settling it back in place. He took a few moments to stroke his hands over Die's back and down his thighs before finally shifting off of the bed and stripping out of his clothes. 

Once he was nude, he reached into their bedside drawer and pulled out the lube. He moved back onto the bed and leaned over Die, pressing his lips to his shoulder as he squirted some of the lube into his fingers. After rubbing his fingers together for a moment, he dipped his hand under the towel and began stroking the digits along Die's crack, gently circling his entrance.

Die let out a soft moan, pushing back toward Kyo as he started to rub around on his asshole. He pushed back toward him and then settled with a quiet huff of breath. "Mmm... I like that," he whispered, trying to get more of it.

Kyo smiled and kept up what he was doing, his fingers brushing over Die's entrance, pressing in occasionally. He shifted after a minute and slid them up his crack and back down, teasing his taint and the back of his balls before bringing one up to insert into Die's body.

Die moaned when the finger slipped inside, a shiver running through his body before he pushed his face into the pillow and then rubbed his cheek there.

Kyo gently eased his finger into Die's body, taking it slower, perhaps more so than necessary. He continued caressing Die's back and thighs as he slowly fingered his lover.

The redhead closed his eyes and simply laid there enjoying what was happening to him and doing his best to sort himself out at the same time. Somehow, it was easier with Kyo behind him, putting the effort into the situation while he just rested.

Kyo carried on what he was doing, eventually adding a second finger and thrusting the digits into Die's passage. He leaned down to nuzzle against Die's neck, nibbling the skin there lightly as he worked.

Die shivered slightly and then breathed out, "I'm sorry for the things I said."

Kyo shook his head, pressing his lips to Die's shoulder, staying there for a few seconds before offering a quiet, "Shhh..it's okay, love."

"I know... I just... I need to apologize. It was selfish and jealous and petty." He rubbed his cheek against the pillow again. "I love you, and I support you. I was in the middle of my crisis, and I threw out things I never should have said."

Kyo paused and bit his lip. Shifting, he pulled his fingers free and after quickly wiping them off, he lay next to Die and pulled the other into his arms again. "I sincerely forgive you, Die." He stroked his lover's cheek, leaning in to kiss him gently.

Die moved just enough to press his lips against Kyo's own, kissing him sweetly before he just smiled and settled back again. "Thank you."

The vocalist smiled then patted Die's hip. "On your back, darling, I want to look at your face..."

Rolling over, Die spread his legs again, finding it convenient he was now lying on the towel.

Kyo smiled and moved between Die's legs, pushing his thighs apart and stroking his hands over them, scratching lightly with his nails. "Somedays, I find it so hard to believe that I'm lucky enough to have you all to myself..." He reached for the lube, squirting a good amount onto his length, stroking himself after with a soft groan.

"In what universe would you not?" Die asked softly. "We were meant to come together, I think... fate pushed us together years ago."

Kyo's eyes sparkled as he gazed down at Die, his lover's words sending his heart thumping. Without replying, he shifted between Die's legs and guiding his cock into his lover's body, groaning softly as he slid in to the hilt. Once he was there, he leaned down and pressed his lips firmly to Die's before whispering against them. "Thank the Gods for fate, then..."

Die reached up for Kyo, pulling him down fully against him and tucking his face against his neck, nodding a little as he closed his eyes and just started to rock into Kyo's movements. Kyo barely rolled his hips, refusing to ramp it up too quickly. He brought his hand up to push through Die's hair, nuzzling against him as he moved.

Die let out a quiet groan as he nuzzled into the other's neck, one leg moving up against the other's hip and just rubbing there.

Kyo slipped his hand down between them, stroking over Die's length for a moment then moving to his hip. He sped up his thrusts then slowed down, shivering slightly as he did.

The guitarist let out a whimpering moan and arched up toward him. He shivered slightly and then whispered out a quiet, "Kyo..."

Kyo groaned lowly as Die whispered his name. He lifted his head to gaze down into his lover's eyes, smiling gently. "My Koi..," he uttered softly, rolling his hips forward a little harder, unable to help it at this point, need taking him over.

Die offered a quiet moan in return, his hips arching up from the bed for a moment before settling back again, his hands moving over the other's arms and then squeezing lightly at his biceps.

Kyo let out a soft sound when Die moved. He reached down to grasp his hip, starting to really thrust into him, shuddering. "A-ah..."

A quiet grunt came from Die as Kyo thrust into him, his back arching again. "So good," he whispered softly.

Kyo hummed, running both hands up Die's thighs then holding onto his hips as he pushed into him. He was softly panting by now, his abdomen tight with need, orgasm not far off.

Die let out a quiet moan, settling against the bed again, watching his lover closely, just reveling in how he looked and all of his reactions.

Kyo's face contorted with pleasure as he finally started working towards his end, thrusting harder into Die, moans sliding from his lips. He slipped his hand between them, grasping Die's cock and stroking him in time with his thrusts.

The instant Kyo took hold of him, Die cried out, having been waiting on that moment for a few minutes by then. His head fell back, and he arched into the touch, his hands falling to the comforter to twist in it.

The vocalist labored over his lover, watching him, moaning softly as his hand moved over his cock. "So gorgeous...," he murmured, pushing hard into his body.

"Cum for me," Die panted out, his breath hitching.

Kyo shuddered at Die's words, leaning over him to kiss him hard before shifting back onto his knees. He grasped Die's thigh, thrusting hard and fast into him for a minute before crying out as he started cumming. His cock flexed within Die's body as spurt after spurt filled his passage. "Die!"

Die moaned as the other started to fill him with his cum, his hips arching up toward him. A whimper left him before he eased himself back down against the bed and reached for Kyo's hand, gently taking it away from his cock, a small smile on his lips.

Kyo's hips finally stilled, and he just sat there, panting, a shiver going through him. He eventually looked at Die, confusion on his face as he reached up to cup his cheek. "Baby..."

Die tugged Kyo down and kissed him on the lips. "I don't have to cum every single time... besides, you think you're getting off that easy? Not tonight, darling... it certainly hasn't been the requisite half an hour."

Kyo kissed Die back then let out a soft laugh. "Mmm, I see...well, if that's how you want it, fine. I'll just stop putting in the effort..."

Die pulled him down and breathed out in his ear. "Maybe I'm trying something..."

Kyo raised an eyebrow then smirked, turning his head to nip at his neck. "Is that so?" He lifted his head up and kissed Die deeply, rocking his hips for a moment then pulling out.

"That is so," Die returned just before Kyo's mouth claimed his own. He let out a little whine, kissing him deeply in return.

Kyo shifted to lie beside Die, pressing his face against his neck as he did. He licked and nibbling the skin there, going up to his ear and nipping the lobe. "Well, whatever it is, I'm on board..."

"Then get your dick hard again," Die whispered out, chuckling a bit.

Kyo snorted and rolled off the bed, holding up his finger. "Stay there; don't move," he ordered, wandering stark naked out of the room. He made his way to the bathroom and got a wet washcloth, cleaning himself up thoroughly. He walked back into the bedroom and flopped down on the bed, smirking at Die. "You make my dick hard again..."

Die watched him wander off. When he came back, he rolled over and peered at him, looking down and finding him clearly cleaned up. He smirked. "Mmm... freshly washed for me, darling."

Kyo smirked and ran his hand down over his length, stroking it lightly, already partially hard again. "Mmhmm, 3 guesses for what I want you to do..."

"Ummmmmmm," Die exaggerated it on purpose and then laughed. "Rub my ass on you?"

Kyo snorted and reached over, slapping Die's thigh. "Dork," he laughed out, shaking his head.

"I'll take that as a ‘no’. Let's see... guess number two... maybe this?" He reached out and gently ran his pinky down Kyo's length.

Kyo licked his lips, his cock twitching faintly at Die's touch. "Mm, getting warmer..."

Die smirked and inched his way down. "Mmm... then maybe... guess three," he leaned down and dragged his tongue over Kyo's cock.

Kyo watched Die make his way downward, anticipation written on his face. He let out a soft moan when Die used his tongue, causing him to shiver. "Hnng...correct.."

For a few moments, Die simply ran his tongue over the other's cock over and over, feeling him harden beneath his touches.

Kyo stroked his fingers through Die's hair, letting out soft moans now and then in appreciation of Die's actions. "Ah, s'good..."

Die breathed out a quiet sound before he pushed his lips against the tip of the other's cock, sliding his head down over his length and starting to bob over him.

Kyo shuddered, his hips jerking a couple of times before he settled again. He got a good grip on Die's hair and held tight, lightly pushing his lover's head further down.

The redhead let Kyo push him down on his dick, just closing his eyes and doing his best to relax his throat, though he did gag a little for a second before managing.

Another load moan worked its way from Kyo's throat as his cock slipped further into Die's mouth. He shifted and thrusted into Die's mouth a couple of times, careful of how far he was going but loving the feeling of it nonetheless. "Fuck, Die..." He gently pulled the redhead up off of his length and smirked down at him, licking his lips. "I think...I'm hard enough...," he chuckled, his cock flexing a bit.

Die gave him a look that clearly was a mock glare. "Just when I was getting used to you gagging me on your fucking dick, too."

Kyo raised an eyebrow and jerked Die's head down, pushing his cock back into his lover's mouth. "What was that?"

Die groaned and then gagged again. It took him a moment longer to get ahold of himself this time, and by the time he did, his eyes were watering, but his dick was definitely hard as a rock.

Kyo smirked and rather forcefully thrust into Die's mouth for a moment then stilled. His cock twitched against his lover's tongue, pulling a moan from his lips as he gaze down at him. "You look so fucking gorgeous with your lips around my dick."

Die stared up at the other, tears running down his cheeks, but a gleam in his eyes that hadn't been there for a while. He just waited, breathing through his nose while the other decided what to do with him. He wasn't going to move, Kyo was going to have to make him... after all, that was half the thrill for him.

The look in Die's eyes told Kyo all he needed to know about whether or not the other was enjoying this. He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth as he slowly rolled his hips, easing his cock in and out of Die's mouth.

Shivering a little, Die closed his eyes and just concentrated on keeping himself in line as the other started to fuck his mouth again, doing it quite gently this time. Somehow it was harder for him not to gag this way.

Kyo took his time, slowly ramping up the speed of his thrusts until he reached the point he'd been before, nearly burying Die's nose in the sparse bit of pubic hair he had. When it all became too much for him, he pulled Die's head up, groaning at the string of precum and saliva that trailed from his cock to Die's lips. "Fuck," he uttered quietly, his hand drifting down to cup and squeeze his own sac, shuddering.

Die came up off his dick and sat there panting for air, a wild sort of look in his eyes as he stared down at Kyo's cock. For all intents and purposes, he looked like he wanted to eat Kyo alive.

Kyo gazed down at Die, giving his hair a slight yank before smirking. "Lick my sac...then I want your mouth back around my cock and your hand on your dick."

A shudder ripped through Die as he leaned down and did exactly what he was told, lapping at Kyo's balls, enjoying the differing texture of the skin against his tongue. He moaned, sucking one into his mouth and then releasing it and licking again, reaching down to wrap his hand around his own dick, though no moving it, just flexing his fingers a bit.

Kyo dropped his head back and groaned, his cock twitching as Die licked at his balls. He released the guitarist's hair, moving his hand to cup the back of his neck. With a moan, he slid his free hand over his own chest, tweaking his nipple a couple of times, riding his high of pleasure.

Die sucked the other ball into his mouth and then popped back off of it with a grunt. He licked up Kyo's cock and then went back to his balls, nipping and sucking.

Kyo let out a variety of moans and huffs as Die's mouth worked over him. "Daisuke...Gods..."

Finally, Die moved his hand a few times, jacking off quickly for a few seconds and then stopping. He breathed out a quiet sound and then moved back up to Kyo's dick, sliding his mouth over it and bobbing his head quick, shoving himself down on him as far as he could without being forced.

Kyo grunted when Die returned to sucking his cock, loving the way he was going about it. He jerked his hips up, finally moving his hand back to the top of Die's head, forcing him down to the base of his dick. "Fuck, right there!"

Die sucked as hard as he could, gagging a little at the last part and then bucking his own hips forward as he gagged again. More tears spilled down his cheeks as he started to cum, his throat tightening as a reflex, causing him, in turn, to choke even harder on Kyo's dick.

Kyo's eyes rolled to the back of his head as Die gagged around him. He waited until Die finished cumming back yanking his head back, reaching down to wrap his hand around his own cock, jerking himself off hard and fast. It wasn't another minute before he was crying, his cum spurting all over Die's lips and chin. "Fuck!"

Die just kept his mouth open when Kyo yanked him back, gasping for air and trying not to keep gagging, though he did at least once more. A forceful shudder went through him as Kyo's cum hit his lips and he barely kept himself upright.

Kyo eased out the last bit of his cum, pulling Die forward to smear it over his lips, pushing the head of his cock into his open mouth a couple of times then finally releasing him. He groaned and petted Die's hair. "Gods..."

For a moment, Die wavered and then shivered a little, flopping off to the side and closing his eyes, wincing as he swallowed as well as he could, finding his throat raw. Honestly... he was pleased at that though, the feeling something he'd been missing.

Kyo stared down at his lover then shifted forward, sliding into the bed next to him. He pulled him over into his arms and pushed his face against his neck, groaning softly. "You ok?" he murmured.

Die breathed out a little laugh and then nodded, reaching to push a trembling hand through his hair. "Yeah... I'm... fucking fantastic. You?"

Kyo chuckled softly and reached to cup Die's cheek, kissing him, ignoring the cum that was now smeared on his chin. "Mmm, I'm perfect...thank you."

Die gently kissed the other back for a moment before pulling back and flopping down again. He mopped his hand over his face and then grunted. "Need to wash."

Kyo huffed softly, lying back and pushing his hand through his hair. "Yeah...don't wanna move, though. You sucked the energy right out of me."

"Heh... sucked," Die pushed himself up regardless and smirked as he stood there for a moment before moving away, heading toward the bathroom to wipe up.

Once there, he washed off his face real well, using some soap since he'd already showered and then cleaned his dick in much the same manner. Finished, he dried off and padded back toward the bedroom, looking intensely tired.

Kyo watched Die go, huffing softly after a minute and sitting up. He had just stood up when Die returned. He noted Die's obvious exhaustion and reached out to cup his cheek. "Gonna shower real quick, okay? You can crash if you want...you look like you're about to anyway..."

Die gave a little nod of his head and reached to run his hand through Kyo's hair, rubbing at it and fluffing it before he padded past him and pushed the comforter off the bed into the floor. He yanked the sheet down and then flopped face-first onto the bed, barely pulling himself into it and covering himself.

Kyo leaned into Die's touch then turned, heading for the bathroom. Once there, he made quick work of showering himself, shaving and brushing his teeth. After making sure he was thoroughly dried off, he padded back into the bedroom and crawled into bed next to Die. Chuckling at his lover's position, he wrapped his arm around him and tugged him more towards the middle of the bed. Giving a great yawn, he closed his eyes and nuzzled against Die's shoulder. "Mmm..."

Die was already out like a light by the time Kyo came in. Even with the tugging, he didn't even bat an eyelash, just continuing to snore... very loudly.

Kyo laid there for a moment then let out a huff of a laugh as Die snored. He shook his head then settled down, soon dozing off himself, a smile on his face.


	70. Chapter 70

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Kyo returned home from running errands to find that Die wasn't there yet. Shrugging he went about putting away the few groceries and household supplies he'd bought while out then decided to do a little cleaning up. After taking care of the cat boxes and refilling their food dishes, he focused on cleaning out the bunny's cage. He diligently wiped it down and filled it with new bedding then went to put their bunny back in. The bunny, however, had other ideas and set up a fuss as Kyo was trying to put him in the cage. 

The vocalist laughed and plopped down on his butt in the floor, pulling the bunny into his lap. "You're spoiled, you know that?" he murmured to the soft creature, toying with his ears.

Die had made a run of his own, going to get refill fluid for his e-cigarette, beer, and a couple of limited edition things for the upcoming sakura season. By the time he got home, he looked a bit frazzled, though nothing overly horrible.

Once he'd ditched his shoes, he made his way into the kitchen to put things away, glancing at Kyo and then at the bunny, pausing to grin at him, despite the five or so bags on his arm. "Now isn't that just damned adorable?"

Kyo looked up when Die spoke and promptly flipped him the bird, though his mouth was pulling into a grin. "Yeah, yeah, shut up." He picked the rabbit up and held him against his chest as he stood up, settling the bunny on the table for now. "Are those sakura flavored chocolates I see?"

"Yes... among other things." Die glanced at where the rabbit had been settled and then moved to put the bags down on the counter, coming back to the rabbit and leaning over, making a kissy face. The fuzzy little creature hopped over to him and then leaned in close, wiggling his whiskers against Die's mouth and nose, causing Die to grin. "Yes, you give daddy kisses, don't you?"

Kyo licked his lips in anticipation of the sweets. He watched Die with the bunny for a moment, rolling his eyes as he moved over to the sink to wash his hands. After he'd dried them, he started digging in Die's bags, pulling out one of the chocolates. "I finally cleaned his cage."

"Thank you; he needed it." He picked the bunny up and cradled him against his chest, gently holding his bottom and his feet. Grabbing a wet wipe, he washed off the table and then meandered over to the bags. "Basically all of the limited stuff... ended up with some extras and a few places, I didn't even have to stand in line... sort of traded some autographs and photos for stuff. Not on purpose though, don't get me wrong."

Kyo leaned against the counter, nodding. "Good, we also have a few dozen invites to viewing parties, so extras will come in handy." He smirked at the way Die's fame paved the way for him, shaking his head. "That's hilarious...The lady at the pet store thought I was a thief or something. She kept following me around and asking if I was certain I didn't need help."

Die let out a soft chuckle. "It's the tattoos, Mr. Yakuza, didn't you know?" He leaned in and kissed Kyo's cheek, still stroking the rabbit's fur gently.

Kyo puffed out his cheeks then turned, kissing Die's lips. "Just wait until summer: tank tops, no hoodie...they'll really be scared then." He snorted and shook his head, reaching up to pet the bunny's head.

Die breathed out a laugh, "And I'll be turned on constantly." He held the bunny so that he could see Kyo reaching for him and just relaxed there, letting Kyo pet him.

"But honestly, what was I going to steal in the pet shop? Kibble?"

"More bunnies... a snake... who knows."

Kyo chuckled then hitched up an eyebrow. "Is that some sort of suggestion, Die? Are you after more pets?" He fondled the rabbit's soft ear, smiling when he twitched it.

"No, I am not." Die closed his eyes and then turned his head away, sneezing hard, though he made little noise doing it. The process was repeated three more times, and he groaned. "Ahh... spring, fuck you."

Kyo hummed, then winced when Die started sneezing, rescuing the bunny from his arms. "Yeah, I've already determined that I'm going to have to pretty much wear masks from now on." He moved to settle the bunny in his cage, leaving the door open for now. Once he was done, he moved back to his lover's side and slipped his arms around his waist, just standing there.

Die blew his nose while the other was putting the bunny away. Once Kyo was back and his arms around him, he groaned and face-planted against his shoulder. "Christ."

Kyo tsked and pushed his fingers through Die's hair. "Poor baby." He turned his head to press a light kiss to the side of Die's neck.

"Mmm..." he pushed his face into Kyo's neck and then nipped lightly before pulling back. "There's some ice cream in there; might want to get it in the freezer."

The vocalist nodded and turned back to the bags, pulling out the container of ice cream and putting in the freezer. He went ahead and put the other things away as well, making a mental note to go easy on the sweets.

Die quickly padded off to go get some allergy pills from the bathroom. He ended up in the bathroom, leaving the door wide open, and washed his hands and face before taking two of the pills.

Kyo finished up with their new groceries and moved to the living room, finding that the bunny had made his way in there. He lifted him up onto the couch then settled down next to him.

Die came back downstairs when Kyo didn't show up there and settled on the other side of Kyo, leaning toward him. "I took pills; that's all, I promise."

Kyo peered at him for a moment then nodded, turning to plop his feet in Die's lap. He scooped up the rabbit and leaned back, partially lying down as he settled the bunny on his chest. "Are they the kind that make you sleepy?"

"Nope. But they're the ones that make _you_ sleepy." Die smirked down at him.

Kyo pursed his lips and lightly jabbed Die's stomach with his foot. "Shush. Falling asleep mid-recording got my ass chewed…and not in a pleasant way."

"Mmm... I don't think chewing one’s ass is ever pleasant. Licking, yes."

"I was thinking more of a little nibble..."

Die breathed out a quiet laugh and then tilted his head back. After a few moments, he just pulled out his phone and started flipping through things, chewing on his lower lip as he did.

Kyo fell into a half-doze, stroking the rabbit's soft fur. After a while, the bunny hopped off of him and down onto the floor, apparently needing food or something. Kyo stayed where he was for a few moments then sat up, rubbing his face and head. "Whatcha doin’? Texting your girlfriend?"

Die looked vaguely startled when Kyo asked what he was doing, flushing slightly and then holding out his phone. The screen displayed a forum he'd obviously logged into, the topics very much kinky and definitely up Die's alley. The current thread he was reading had to do with ways to sneakily get away with pissing in public and the stories of those who had tried it.

Kyo licked his lips and leaned in to read Die's screen, a soft huff of a laugh escaping him after he figured out what it was. "Mm, I see. Feeling kinky lately?"

"Just horny," Die admitted quietly, looking vaguely embarrassed to have been caught not humping Kyo's brains out, but instead reading a forum like this. In some ways, he supposed it wouldn't look like it made any sense, but in his mind, it did. He liked to get really riled up before he hit Kyo up for sex, everything just feeling better for him that way.

Kyo smirked and reached down, groping Die's crotch lightly for a moment before moving away. "Mmm, they kind of go hand in hand..." He grinned then grabbed up the TV remote. He punched a few buttons, pulling up their saved movies. A few more buttons, and he had one of his favorite porns on the screen, moans filling the room. He leaned back and watched as the two males on screen fucked against a huge window over-looking a city scene.

Die's eyes flicked up to the screen, a shocked look going over his face when the other turned on porn. He pointed at it and then breathed out a laugh. "Are you telling me I could have been watching porn on the big screen all this time, and I'm too dumb to figure it out?"

Kyo flicked his eyes to Die's face then smirked. "I could say that, or I could just say...surprise." He chuckled and gestured toward it. "I set it up last weekend after running across a tutorial."

"Oh thank god... at least I wasn't missing something stupid." Die's eyes flicked between the screen of his phone and the screen as he hurriedly finished up reading the page of the thread he was currently on. Finally, he shoved the phone in his pocket and settled back, one arm hanging over the back of the couch as he stared at the porn. "So, how do we put it up there... like where do I need to put the movies?"

Kyo shifted and watched the porn for a moment before pausing it. "It's wirelessly connected to the desktop upstairs, so that's where you'd put the movies. Other than that you just go to menu, select the computer's name, enter the password and choose from the list."

"Excellent." Die scooted closer to him and then settled again. "My dick's hard..." he peered down at Kyo's lap, a smirk on his face, "How's yours doing?" Childish, but hilarious and sort of cute overall.

Kyo chuckled then glanced over, licking his lips. "Mmm, I see that..." He shifted back and pushed his hips up, revealing the slight bulge in his pants. "Getting there for sure..." He pressed play on the movie and leaned in against, pressing their thighs together.

Die settled in, his head on Kyo's shoulder, one arm around the back of the couch behind Kyo. He wet his lips and then shivered a little as he stared at the screen. The scene on the screen progressed to the bottom being shoved over the back of a chair, the top spanking him as he fucked him hard and fast. Kyo found himself squirming slightly, soft sighs leaving his lips as he pushed his hips up some, a definite tent in his pants now.

Die couldn't help but notice Kyo's little squirms, and he pressed his lips to the other's ear. "Do you want to be spanked, darling?" he purred out quietly.

Die's words sent a shiver down his spine, and Kyo turned his head slightly, breathing out, "Maybe..." He couldn't deny the fact that the idea turned him on.

"Mmm, good, because I just might want to spank your ass raw." Die bit at his lover's earlobe and then released it, sitting back and smirking.

Kyo let out half a moan, his dick visibly twitching in his pants. He didn't say anything, just slid his hand over to Die's thigh and squeezed it hard. Die remained silent as well, just letting the partial threat hang in the air like that for the time being. He smirked to himself, leaning back, his eyes on the screen.

After the scene ended, Kyo just silently flipped to another movie. This one feature a man tied up in gorgeous shibari, suspended from the ceiling and being spanked with a red leather covered paddle. The vocalist licked his lips and shifted against Die, a soft groan escaping him as his cock rubbed against the front of his pants in a nearly painful way.

Die's fingers rubbed over Kyo's thigh as he murmured, "Tell me... which way is it that gets you off thinking about?"

Kyo watched Die's fingers for a moment before turning his head, leaning over to nip at Die's earlobe. "The first moreso than this, though...the rope and the way he's leaking are a bonus..."

Die smirked a bit. He'd meant to find out if Kyo wanted to be more dominant or submissive tonight, but he didn't push it, satisfied that he'd gotten an answer at all. He'd just test the ground and see where he got. "Take your dick out."

Kyo settled back and glanced at Die fora moment before reaching down and undoing his belt. He pulled it completely off, then unfastened and unzipped his jeans, groaning as he freed his cock from the confines of his underwear.

The redhead took in the view of the other's cock out on display all for him and then smirked, settling back again and looking up at the screen. His own cock was aching, but it was far more fun to torture the other like this. "Do only as I tell you, are we clear?"

Die's words sent a white hot spike of arousal through him and he bit his lip to keep from moaning. He cleared his throat and nodded, quietly answering, "Crystal clear."

"Watch the screen then." Die rested himself back against the other's side, smirking slightly as he settled in for what he planned on being more than a bit of a torture session.

Kyo licked his lips and turned back to the screen, squirming a bit with anticipation. The movie moved on to the Dom fucking the sub's bright red ass, using the ropes as support. All in all, it was a rather intense scene, and Kyo found himself achingly hard by the time it was over. He had a feeling, though, that his release was not in the near future.

Die waited until the scene was over and then pointed at the remote. "Put on another movie." Still, he didn't even move to touch Kyo, more than a little amused by making him just sit there, so hard it probably hurt and without a single touch to satisfy anything.

Kyo quickly grabbed up the remote and chose another movie. This one being one of Die's favorites. He set it to play then settled back, his hand swiping over his own thigh.

"Hands..." Die murmured, swatting sharply at the other's fingertips and then settling in, smirking at the screen. "Dirty bitch... choosing one to make me hornier."

Kyo gave a soft huff but stilled his hand, griping the material of his pants instead. "You didn't specify...," he replied as he watched the actor on screen start pissing in an alley.

Die let out a laugh and then focused back on the screen, reaching down to grope himself, making sure he did it lewdly enough that Kyo would know he was getting relief while Kyo himself was not.

Kyo glanced over at Die, watching him grope himself. He groaned lowly then turned back to the screen, squirming some more in his seat, unable to be still.

"Talk to me, tell me what's going on in your head, darling."

Kyo licked his lips and breathed out a soft sigh. "All I can think about is how damn hard my dick is, and how much I'd like to be able to find some sort of relief..."

"I see..." Die grabbed his own cock again, grinning at he gestured. "Tip of one finger, press it to the tip for three seconds, don't move it around, just press and hold. Then let go, and change the movie."

The vocalist watched Die for a moment then did as he was told, pressing the tip of his middle finger to the top of his cock and counting down from three. His breath hitched as he released it, a string of precum forming between his cock and finger. He stared at it for a moment then finally switched the movies to something with two men fucking each other in public.

Die clucked his tongue and then murmured, "My my... someone is so fucking aroused he can't even contain himself, isn't he?" He grinned to himself.

Kyo let out a groan, pushing his hips up to emphasize how aroused he was. "Yes," he hissed out, settling back down and letting out a huff.

Die smirked, his eyes moving to the screen as he settled again, ensuring he wasn't arousing himself more than the movie was forcing him to be. It kept him in line and at least mostly in control. "Tell me how your cock feels right now."

Kyo licked his lips and leaned back. "Rock hard, aching, throbbing...I can barely stand it."

Die bit out a little chuckle and then leaned over Kyo, intentionally brushing over him in a variety of ways to dig around in the drawer next to him. Finally, he sat back, nothing at all in his hand, and crossed his legs, moving him slightly away from Kyo, all contact ceasing.

Kyo hissed softly at the touch, little shocks going through his body at the touch. He was so riled up and sensitive. Groaning he turned to look at Die, glowering. "Tease..."

"Shut up," Die responded easily, flicking his wrist toward the other delicately.

Kyo clenched and unclenched his fingers, wanting to retaliate in some way but didn't want to push Die too far. Huffing, he settled back and started at the screen, not really seeing the figures on it.

Die waited for a while and then murmured, "You're not really watching. You look glazed, darling. Watch the movie. Get horny off of it. You may not touch yourself, but I never said you couldn't do other things." He paused for a moment and then offered, "Flexing your cock is sexy."

Kyo blinked himself out of his stupor and turned to peer at Die for a moment before his hand landed on the taller's thigh, squeezing hard. He forced his attention back to the movie, watching carefully, his hips pushing up a few times as he flexed his dick with a moan.

Die looked down at the hand, but said nothing about it. He just smiled as he looked up at the television set again. Each time Kyo shifted, Die looked down at him, watching him move, content to just torture the other like this. "How badly do you want to cum, my love?"

Kyo leaned his head back against the couch, his cock flexing particularly hard as the bottom on screen jizzed all over himself. He glanced at Die, squeezing his leg again. "Bad enough that my balls are almost painfully tight..."

Die looked down at him when he moved his hips like that. He bit his lip and then looked back up at the screen. "Look... they're so horny, aren't they? Just like you maybe?"

Kyo gritted his teeth, feeling more and more frustrated. He rubbed his hand over Die's thigh in an anxious gesture as his cock bobbed between his legs, precum oozing from the tip. "Perhaps..."

Die reached over and caught a bead of precum, licking it from his finger just after. He sucked on the tip of his finger and then groaned softly, looking back at the screen.

Kyo shuddered and cried out softly at the unexpected touch, his breath coming in pants for a few seconds. He watched Die suck his finger as he dug his nails into the other's skin. "Die...please...I can't take it anymore..."

Die smirked, pretending he was staring at the screen, though he was actually looking at Kyo's dick. "I never told you that you couldn't cum."

The vocalist stared at Die for a moment then huffed, leaning back again. He spread his legs a bit more and started practically humping the air, his cock flexing with each push of his hips, his hands gripping the couch and Die's leg.

Die gave up on pretending not to look at Kyo, blatantly staring at him as he outright humped the air. He bit his lip hard and then shuddered as he watched, his eyes obviously filled with complete and total lust. "Come on, baby... lose it for me."

Kyo turned his head to gaze at Die's face as he became more frantic, his whole body tense. Finally, he squeezed his eyes shut and flexed his cock a few more times before letting out a soft cry as he started cumming. He shuddered harshly, continuing to buck his hips up as spurt after spurt pushed out, going on not only him but hitting the floor as well. "A-ah...fuck!"

Die's mouth fell open as he watched Kyo cum like that. With a groan, he pushed himself up off the couch and then plopped down on the floor between his legs. He leaned down and licked up the length of Kyo's shaft, groaning as he slid his mouth over the tip and sucked hard.

Kyo slumped back against the couch once he'd finished cumming, a few shivers going through him. He blinked when Die moved and fell between his legs, confused at first but then he was crying out as his lover's tongue slid over his sensitive cock. 

He let out another cry, ending it on a moan when Die started sucking him. "Oh fuck, Die!"

Die sucked him harshly for a few moments before he pulled back and licked his lips, smirking up at him. He pushed up off the floor and moved to press his lips against the other's ear. "Touch me... through my pants."

Kyo was a panting mess by the time pulled off him. His cock was still hard and aching, and it took him a few moments to focus on Die's request. Flicking his eyes up at his lover, he reached out, brushing his hand lightly over his crotch, forming his fingers around his length.

Die's hips pressed forward, a soft sigh sliding out of his mouth as the other started to touch him. He bit lightly at the other's earlobe and then licked it gently. "I adore your touch, darling... I adore it more than you know."

Kyo shivered slightly, moving his hand to cup and squeeze Die's cock, his thumb find and rubbing over the head. He groaned softly, shifting his position a bit to get a better access.

"That's right... just like that, baby doll... just touch my fucking cock." Die's fingers slid through Kyo's hair and then yanked harshly, a groan sliding from his own lips at the action.

Kyo grunted at the hair pull, though there was no denying the action went straight to his cock. Forming his hand around Die's cock, he started stroking him through his pants, loving the way they were tented out.

The guitarist's hips tilted forward, a low moan sliding through his lips as the other got ahold of him like that. He finally shifted to slide onto Kyo's lap, yanking his head back again and pressing his lips up under the other's jaw, sucking at the skin there.

Kyo swallowed and let out a moan, pushing his hips up as soon as Die was seated atop him. He rearranged and went over Die's cock again, finding the head and rubbing over it a few times with his nail.

Die's hips jerked then, a tremor ripping through him. He licked at the other's Adam's apple and leaned up to catch his mouth, kissing him hard. The vocalist groaned into the kiss, his other hand coming up to cup Die's face before pushing it up into his hair.

Die let out a growl and grabbed Kyo's hand, prying it free and shoving his hand against the back of the couch. He broke the kiss to sneer out, "Did I fucking tell you to change what we were doing?"

Die's assertiveness sent a shiver down Kyo's spine and he immediately submitted, shrinking back slightly and shaking his head. "No..."

"Then touch my fucking dick," Die snarled out, grabbing Kyo's jaw with his other hand and holding it tight, his eyes narrowing.

Kyo gazed up at Die, arousal burning in his eyes. His cock twitched at the tone in his lover's voice, causing him to shudder once more. Slipping his hand downward, he began touching Die through his pants again, groaning softly.

Die kept his hand there, pursing his lips as he stared him down, his eyes burning into Kyo's as he pushed his hips against the other's hand. Kyo didn't break the eye contact, something about it making him harder than he was earlier. He grasped his lover's cock, stroking it as best as he could through his pants, wanting almost desperately to actually touch it.

A soft groan left the guitarist's lips as he leaned back down and sucked on the other's jaw gently, licking at it just after and then grunting faintly. A few more moments and then he nipped and pulled back, getting off the couch completely, just standing there in front of the other.

Kyo let out an appreciative sound at Die's attentions, his eyes sliding shut for a moment. He opened them once more when he felt Die pulling away, a frown creasing his brown as he hand struggled to reached his crotch still.

Die watched him, his head cocked to the side slightly, a smirk on his lips. And then he turned and started to walk away. "Backyard... now."

Kyo's eyebrows shot up at the command, but he stood and headed for the backyard. He hesitated at the door for a moment before stepping outside, feeling rather exposed, despite their fence.

The moment they were outside, Die grabbed Kyo by the upper arm and hauled him over toward the stone bird bath that had come with the property. He pushed him against it, front first, and slid up behind him, grinding against his ass. He shoved his head down, pressing it against the rim, breathing out a quiet chuckle and hissing out a soft. "You hesitated, darling;... for that, the world will know your shame."

Kyo let out a gasp at being grabbed, _almost_ struggling. He gave a soft 'oomp' when he was pushed against the bird bath, his hands coming up to brace himself, a low whine escaping him.

Die shoved at his head again and then reached down to yank Kyo's pants down, quickly freeing his own cock and sliding up behind him. Reaching down between Kyo's legs, he gathered up some of the other's cum and smeared it over the head of his own dick. A moment later, he grabbed Kyo's short blonde strands and then shoved his cock into the other without any further warning.

Kyo whined again as the air hit is his heated skin. He shifted and spread his legs, glancing back at Die. He didn't have time to process what happened before he was screaming out rather loudly as Die pushed into him. "Oh...FUCK!"

Die reached to slap his hand over Kyo's mouth as he started pounding into him. The harder he went, the more and more he clamped his hand down, his hand shifting up slightly until he had Kyo's nose blocked as well, still fucking him hard as he growled out, "And now the punishment, Koi."

Kyo's first reaction to having Die's hand over his mouth was to gasp, though he go nowhere with that. He drew breath in through his nose, whimpering against his lover's hand until that was stopped as well. A shudder rippled through him, and all he could do was hang on as Die fucked him, even as his vision started to dot.

Something about fucking Kyo like this – raw and unbridled, relentless and utterly sadistic in nature – just turned Die on like nothing else could have. Before he could even think to back off, he was cumming hard, crying out as he bucked against the other, filling him with his cum.

He gave it a few more seconds and then pulled out and let go of Kyo's nose all at the same time. He stepped back just to see if what Kyo would do, his eyes glinting faintly.

Kyo was growing more and more lightheaded as Die fucked him. Whimpers and moans barely escaped him with each rough thrust of his lover's hips, his own cock heavy and hard between his legs. When Die came and filled him up, he shuddered, his body clenching around his lover's cock, wanting so badly to cum as well. He thought for half a second that he could just from that but then Die was pulling away, leaving him there empty. He gasped for air and turned his head back, gazing at the other, breathe coming in heavy pants, cum running down the back of his thighs.

Die wetted his lips, dark eyes assessing his lover's state, a small smirk on his lips. Just when he could see the desperation starting to brim over, he knelt down. "Come to me, love."

Kyo let out a soft groan and gingerly pushed himself up, wincing as he realized his arms were scraped a bit. He turned and stepped over to Die, gazing down at him with pure lust burning in his eyes, so incredibly in love with the way things were going.

Reaching forward, Die held Kyo's hips to steady him and then leaned in, just lapping at the head of his cock, not sucking him and certainly not touching him in any other way: just every few seconds, a small lick to the head of his dick.

The vocalist moaned softly, unable to help reaching out to rest his hand on Die's head. His hips jerked forward with almost every lap of Die's teasing tongue, every part of him wanting to push him down further. Of course, Die was the one in charge now, not him, and so he settled for enjoying what pleasure the guitarist was giving him.

Die finally paused, just delving his tongue into the slit, naturally not getting far, but enjoying the taste of Kyo's precum and more so enjoying teasing him in such a manner.

Kyo's cock twitched at Die's actions and he groaned, his hand tightening just the slightest in the other’s red locks. He wondered how long the other would leave him like this, needy and wanting. "Die...," he breathed out, everything is his voice evidence of his growing desperation.

The redhead arched an eyebrow at the whine, and he let out a chuckle, pulling back from him. "What? Can't cum from the teasing, Koi?"

Kyo bit his lip hard, gazing down at Die. Even the way his lover uttered what was usually his term of endearment had him on edge. He flexed his fingers again then shook his head.

"Aww... poor baby," Die gritted out, sarcasm dripping from his voice. "And it's just too damn bad, isn't it?" He stood up and then adjusted himself, zipping his pants back up. "Too bad, so sad." With that, he turned away, making his way to the planter and pulling out the pack of cigarettes. He lit one and then plopped down in the chair, just letting it smolder in his hand as he always did when he craved one. 

Eventually, he patted his knee. "Come and sit. Put your pants back up first. I'd rather not have my own cum on my pants."

Kyo bit the inside of his cheek hard to keep from smarting off at Die's sarcasm. He clenched his fists for a moment, watching Die move off to the chair, eyes focused on the cigarette burning in his hand. 

When the other spoke again, he sighed quietly and pulled his pants up, grunting at the mess. Leaving them open, his still hard cock out, he walked over to Die and settled in his lap.

Die let out a soft sound when Kyo sat down. He licked his lips and settled his hand on Kyo's arm, the cigarette still burning between his fingers. Every once in a while a few ashes fell down from the tip, Die gazing at it and occasionally at Kyo's dick.

Kyo sat there in Die's lap, squirming occasionally, his hand rubbing over his thigh a few times. He inhaled the smoke from Die's cigarette, finding it to be a near comforting smell. After a few minutes, he grew impatient and finally reached out, plucking the burning stick from the guitarist's fingers. Bringing it to his lips, he drew the smoke into his mouth, slowly and carefully, making sure inhalation was minimal. He turned to look at Die as he parted his lips and let it stream out with his breath and curl in the night air between them.

Die's eyes narrowed at Kyo as he watched what he was doing. He grabbed the cigarette and then held it up in front of his face, quite close to it. "Do you want it that bad? Bad enough to let it cause some _severe_ damage to you?"

Kyo made a face when the cigarette was taken then focused his eyes on its burning ember. Die's words were cold and spoke of a promise of pain. Still and yet, he gave his lover a challenging look, tongue slicking out over his bottom lip. "Maybe."

For a brief moment, Die almost looked panicked. But after a moment, he let out a quiet, "So be it," his voice steady as he turned the cigarette upside down, the glowing ember toward the ground. A moment later, he pressed it down against Kyo's thigh, just slowly pressing it in against the denim, letting it burn through the material and then putting it out on bare skin, tossing the butt on the ground and brushing his hand over the area to ensure it was out, though the gesture was seemingly uncaring to the outward viewer.

Kyo watched Die's actions, a shiver of fear and arousal combined going through him. He glanced down, watching the material of his jeans burn then felt the fire burning his skin. It hurt, but it also made him moan, his cock throbbing as he jerked his hips up against the air. "Fuck!"

Die's fingertip moved over the freshly burned area, just gently teasing at it, knowing even that would be painful right then, perhaps more so than actually pressing.

Kyo hissed out in pain, his hand going to grasp Die's, nails biting into the skin. Still, he remained hard, a true testament to how much he got off on pain.

Die swatted Kyo's hand off of his own and then rather abruptly grabbed Kyo's dick, jacking him off quickly, his hand hitting his lap hard on each downward stroke, trying to give him some amount of torture from it.

Kyo's brain had trouble processing the sudden pleasure mixing in with the burning pain on his leg. It took him a few seconds before he was moaning out rather loudly, his hips jerking up into Die's hand. 

It was with a smack to his leg that Kyo fell over the edge, his head dropping back as he started to cum. He held on tightly to the chair arm as he nearly convulsed in Die's lap, his cum spurting wildly from his cock.

Die grunted faintly as Kyo started to lose it, stroking him through the whole thing. Once he was done, he chuckled and then leaned in to kiss his cheek gently. "You okay?"

Kyo finally finished up and all but melted into Die's arms, turning slightly to lay his head against his chest. He shivered then nodded.

Die reached to rub over the other's good leg and then nuzzled in against him. "Do you need anything specific from me?"

Kyo hummed, reaching down to rest his hand on top of Die's. He glanced up at his lover then smiled a little, leaning up to kiss him deeply. "Mm, just hold me for now?"

Die nodded at the request, his arms going around the other's body and holding him close, gently swaying a bit. Kyo curled up against Die, nuzzling into him, his eyes closing. He let himself come down from the high that the session had given him, a few groans escaping as pain slid through his body.

After a while, Die gently shifted to help get Kyo back into his pants properly, leaning in to press his lips to his ear. "You get to sit in my cum for the rest of the evening. Though... we can go back inside if you wish.

The vocalist huffed softly, squirming around in Die's lap. "I can think of worst things..." He settled once more, glancing down at the burn on his leg and smirking. "We can stay out here a while longer."

"Mmm... far worse things," Die returned quietly. He watched the direction of Kyo's gaze and then winced a bit, pressing his lips against the other's shoulder. "Are you okay?"

Kyo hummed then turned his head, nuzzling against Die's hair. "I'm fine. I asked for it, after all." He reached up to pet Die's hair reassuringly, giving a slight shiver. "Though, I know it's going to sting like a bitch for a while. It'll be a good reminder of our fun."

"It will... a lot." Die's finger traced over the burn lightly and then pulled away. "I have some cream to put on it... not the first time I've dealt with a cigarette burn, trust me."

Kyo licked his lips, his hand finding Die's and interlacing their fingers. "Yeah, not my first, either...tends to happen eventually when you smoke."

"Yeah... smoking..." Die murmured absently, his fingers still tracing around the edge before he finally slid his arm around Kyo's middle.

The smaller's leg twitched as Die's fingers danced near the burn, a stinging pain going through the area. He huffed and shifted, leaning into Die's embrace, closing his eyes. "Hey Die?"

"Hmm?" Die asked softly.

Kyo turned his head and pressed his lips to Die's cheek for a moment before murmuring, "I love you."

Die smiled softly and then petted the other's hair. "I love you, too, darling."


	71. Chapter 71

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Spring had arrived in Japan, and with it, a flurry of activity for Kyo. He found himself wound up with numerous interviews, photoshoots and meetings pertaining to Sukekiyo's impending album release. Though it tired him, the vocalist was thrilled to see his work come to fruition in such a way. It all tied together nicely with the direction Dir en grey were heading, as well: a fact that pleased him greatly. 

Today was one of his less busy days, and after a meeting that morning, he'd taken the time to shop around for some of Die's favorite seasonal treats. Returning home with his bag of sakura flavored sweets, he quickly shed his shoes and jacket, heading into the kitchen. He assumed Die was upstairs so he grabbed a small box of delicately flavored mochi shaped into a sakura blossom and started up the stairs, humming softly.

Die, on the other hand, had been home most of the day. After a few brief things with Dir en grey, he'd had the rest of the day to himself, Kaoru and Shinya far too busy to bother with requiring anyone to show up for other activities. And Die, always being the one to take things headfirst, had decided on doing some spring cleaning. He'd already rooted through everything in the bathroom, having come up with an entire box of soaps and shampoos to go to the local shelter, and then cleaned it all down and put things where they'd originally gone rather than where they'd ended up over the course of the year.

That done, he'd intended to start shampooing the carpets - something he could have hired someone to do, but didn't - but he'd gotten a call from Yakan. The overly excited man on the other end had told him all about this girl he'd been dating on and off for a few years and how they'd finally moved in together and now... they were engaged to be married. And naturally, he wanted Die to be a part of the wedding party. He wasn't best man, but he was one of the groomsmen, and he'd asked him to pull out his best suit for the occasion before he'd hung up to rush off on some errands.

With that in mind, Die had removed his three suits from the closet, and he'd tried each of them on in turn, seeing if he needed to get whichever one he chose altered in any way before the date. Currently, he had his grey suit and the navy one laid out across the bed, and he was wearing the black and silver pinstriped one, a gorgeous silver tie around his neck. He turned to the side and put one hand on his hip, tilting his head at himself in the full-length mirror, debating if he should have the tailor take in a few inches on the pants.

Kyo entered their bedroom to find Die posing in front of the mirror in his suit, giving him pause. He let out a low whistle as he looked Die up and down. "Hello, gorgeous...what's the occasion?"

Die glanced up when the whistle came. He grinned at Kyo and then struck a very diva-like pose before chuckling and turning to look at the other side of himself in the mirror, tugging lightly at the material, noting that it still looked like he had no ass. That was definitely what he needed to fix in this suit. "Well," he extended the word and then grinned, "Yakan is getting married, and I'm one of his groomsmen!"

The vocalist laughed at Die's pose then moved over towards his lover, examining with something akin to lust in his eyes. He opened his mouth to comment then shut it, grinning when Die announced Yakan's wedding. "What? Really? That's awesome!"

"Really... I'm happy for him." Die smiled at Kyo in the mirror, though there was a split second of some other emotion lying beneath the glimmer in his eyes. He shifted again and then smoothed his hands down the front of the suit. "So I think the jacket is just fine. Need to get the pants fixed a bit; I've sort of reshaped in three years, hmm?"

Kyo nodded, smiling at Die before glancing down to his ass, humming thoughtfully. He set the mochi down on the bed and moved closer to Die, reaching out to smooth his hand over the suit. "It's gorgeous on you...it always has been." 

He smirked and slid his hand lower, swiping it over Die's ass for a moment. "But yes, I think the pants need adjusted."

In the moment that Kyo came to him and then slid his hand over his ass, inspiration flashed inside Die's mind. It'd certainly take his mind off of the spark of jealousy he'd just had for a very dear friend, and it would solve another problem that had been hovering on and off all day.

In an instant, he breathed out, "Scene," and then grabbed Kyo's hand, wrenching it away from his ass and shoving him toward the bed nearly violently. Three quick steps brought him after Kyo and had him looming over the other, his stance wide and his shoulder's back, eyes burning with a fire that hadn't been there seconds before. "Is that any way to address your Boss when he asks you about the tailoring of his suit, Niiumura?"

The moment Die indicated a scene, a flush of arousal went through Kyo like wildfire. He gasped as he hit the edge of the bed, stumbling and falling back on it with a soft grunt. He stared up at Die, a defiant tilt to his chin, a sneer painted on his face. "My apologies, _Boss_ ," he spat out, the look on his face just begging Die to retaliate.

"And _that_ is no way to talk to me," Die returned. This time he didn't hold back anything he wanted to do. After he'd gone so far as to calmly burn Kyo with a lit cigarette only a week prior, he honestly held no qualms about doing things like this in scene any longer. Rather abruptly, he backhanded Kyo, his hand smacking right across the other's face, the force of it none to gentle. 

Arousal shot through him like liquid fire, the burn of it stinging much the way whiskey did the first time he'd ever tried it. "How should you address me?"

Kyo was expecting the slap, but it still knocked him off guard. He hissed out in pain as Die's hand connected with his face even as his pants grew tighter. He opened his mouth and worked his jaw, reaching up to touch the burning skin of his cheek for a moment.

His eyes flashed up to Die's face, a condescending smirk on his lips. "With respect, Sir."

Die straightened up, tugging his suit jacket back into place as he stared at Kyo, anger showing in his face, though inside he felt more liberated than he had in years. Something about slapping Kyo like that just made him feel more relaxed than he could recall during any of their sessions where he'd been Dominating. It felt nearly like the first time he'd let Kyo take away all of his control. Perhaps freedom was the best word for it.

Stepping back, he crooked a finger a Kyo. "Stand."

Kyo could see the change in his lover's face and demeanor, every bit of it arousing him completely. This, _this_ sort of behavior is what he craved when he wanted to be Dominated. He barely held back a shiver as he did as Die commanded, standing up and peering at him, the tent in his pants obvious.

Die pointed down at the floor at his feet. He didn't say a word this time, just pointed and waited, a hard look in his eyes.

Kyo looked at Die then the spot he was pointing to, his eyebrow hitching up for a moment. He did his best not to look in the least bit eager as he finally knelt in the proper spot. Placing his hands on his thighs, he gazed up at the redhead, his look still rather rebellious. 

Die studied him, slowly circling him, his hands sliding into his suit pockets as he walked. He made one lap around him and then paused again, looking at himself in the mirror and reaching up to tug at the collar of his jacket, brushing off some imaginary lint. Abruptly, he spun on his foot and grabbed Kyo's short blonde locks, yanking his head back harshly and leaning down right into his face. "Listen here, fucker, if there's one thing you should never _ever_ do, it's piss me the fuck off. Are we crystal clear on that?"

Kyo watched Die circle him, shifting in place a few times. The entire act was glorious, and he made a mental note to compliment his lover on it later. For now, he continued to sit there until Die's hand yanked his head back. He snarled and attempted to jerk away, one hand coming up to wrap around Die's wrist. "Perfectly..."

Die's other hand instantly came to pry Kyo's fingers away from his wrist, still never letting go of his hair. His fingers wrapped hard around Kyo's hand, squeezing as he stared him down, his eyes like ice.

After a brief battle with himself about how far he wanted to push Die, Kyo finally relented, relaxing his hand as he lowered his eyes to the floor.

Die still didn't let go for a few moments. When he did, it was to immediately transfer his hand to Kyo's jaw, pinching and forcing his head back even more. "I think there's still a lesson in order here on how ranks are assigned and why _you_ are not the top of the list here and _I_ am."

A soft sound escaped Kyo as Die gripped his jaw. He squirmed, clenching his jeans in an attempt to keep from reaching up again. He swallowed, flicking his eyes up to Die's face then away again. "Yes, Sir..."

Die released his jaw, seeming satisfied with the response he'd gotten this time. Unzipping his pants, he shifted his boxer briefs aside and freed his already hard cock. The hand in Kyo's hair yanked the vocalist toward his crotch. "You're familiar with what to do, I'm sure. I know your roots... whore."

Kyo licked his lips as Die freed his cock, eyes running over the hardened length with barely contained lust. He nearly growled as Die called him a whore, though it only added to the scene and his arousal. Huffing, he parted his lips and took the head of Die's cock between them, his tongue flicking over it.

Die let out a groan, his hand still never leaving Kyo's hair, though he let him move of his own free will. Unlike usual when his hand was there because he was turned on and barely containing himself from shoving Kyo's head forward... this was different. His hand exerted power without forcing, without a single action other than existing where it did. The threat was clear, the unspoken vow to make Kyo do as he told him if he chose to do otherwise. But, for now, he was allowed at least that much freedom... if one could call it that.

Kyo's actions remained nearly hesitant at first, his tongue merely lapping over the head of Die's cock. He glanced up at the other then pulled back slightly, finally making a show of his supposed "talents." He snaked out his tongue and swirled it over the head, dipping it into the slit before reaching up with one hand to push Die's cock up so he could run his tongue along the underside.

Die groaned when Kyo started to go at him far differently than he usually did. He shivered at the attention, closing his eyes and arching his hips toward the other. For a moment, he just enjoyed as he would have assumed any man in their right mind would have, yakuza Boss or not.

Kyo pulled back and shifted his stance slightly before leaning in again, taking Die between his lips and slowly lowering his head with a quiet groan. Once he'd gone as far as he could, he began bobbing his head up and down, his hand moving to rest on Die's thigh.

Die reached for Kyo's hand, pulling it away from his thigh. That introduced an element of familiarity that he was trying to avoid with the whole scene, and he wasn't going to let it stand. His fingers slowly began to tighten around Kyo's, the pressure growing and growing as the other sucked his cock.

When Die grabbed his hand, Kyo immediately tensed up, his eyes flicking up to the other's face. He flexed his fingers as he carried on bobbing his head, increasing the pace as he sucked Die.

Die let the other keep going on him for quite a while, his arousal building inside though he was showing almost none of it outwardly. He gave it a few seconds longer than he probably should have and then shoved Kyo down on his dick as he started to cum, spurt after spurt shooting down Kyo's throat as he groaned.

Kyo worked diligently on Die's cock, his hips bucking up occasionally as his own arousal grew. He was just beginning to wonder if Die was going to finish down his throat when the other shoved his head down, gagging him. He fought for a moment to regain composure, his eyes tearing up as he ended up with cum spilling from his mouth. He swallowed what he could, moaning whorishly around Die's length.

Pulling back, Die used the hand still in Kyo's hair to shove him toward the floor, one elegantly polished shoe pressing between the other's shoulder blades. "Pants... unfasten them. Now."

Kyo gritted his teeth as he felt Die's foot on his back, something so subservient about the position that it made him want to react. He held it back though, reaching down to unfasten his pants, groaning as his cock all but sprang free.

"Off," Die commanded, his eyes narrowing at the other's back.

Kyo shifted around a bit, pushing his pants down over his ass then stopping, unable to get them any further.

Die stared at Kyo's ass approvingly, a smirk on his lips. He worked up a good amount of spit and then moved his foot, his hand replacing it. Shoving Kyo forward, he leaned down and let the spit drip down from his mouth along the other's crack. A moment later, he shoved two fingers in, that being the only lube or prep at all, and started thrusting vigorously.

Kyo grunted when he was shoved forward, his hands bracing himself against the carpet. He sat there for a moment before letting out a low moan as spit dripped down his crack. He glanced back in time to see Die's fingers shoving into him, a cry ripping free from his throat at the sting of it. He loved it though, this utter subjugation and abuse. His cock was rock hard between his legs, tremors of pleasure shooting through him as Die roughly finger fucked him.

"Is this familiar to you? Do you remember this from so many of your clients before I took you in? Before I taught you this life?" Die fucked him with his fingers even harder.

Kyo played his part well, his shoulders sagging, head bowing in shame even as his hips pushed back. "Yes…Sir!"

Die's hand on his back dragged downward a bit roughly and then he breathed out, "Is this gonna make you cum?"

Kyo shuddered, arching into Die's touch. He let out a whine, his body clenching around the digits pounding into him. "If that's what you want, Boss."

Leaning down, Die hissed out, "I've been waiting years to see your cock leaking onto my floor, you dirty slut," right into the other's ear.

Kyo groaned, pushing back hard against Die's fingers. It took one brief grazing of his prostate, and then he was cumming with a loud cry, his hips jerking as he spurted onto the floor beneath him. He came for what seemed like forever before finally he slumped forward with a soft sound, shuddering.

Die watched the other cum, pulling his fingers free. He sat back and grabbed a few tissues, wiping his fingers as he crouched there, watching Kyo. Kyo rested his forehead on his arm for a moment before turning to look back at Die. He licked his faintly swollen lips, the look on his face that of pure submission.

Slowly, Die smiled at the other, moving to take off his jacket, loosen his tie, and unbutton his shirt. Next came his shoes and then, a moment later, he unfastened his belt and pushed his pants down, putting them aside as well. Kneeling back down, he reached for Kyo.

Kyo shifted back up to watch Die completely disrobe. He was a little sad to see the suit go but when Die reached for him, he eagerly moved towards him.

"Scene," Die breathed out against Kyo's ear, gently kissing it a moment later, his fingertips trailing over Kyo's face and then murmuring quietly, "Are you okay? Did I hurt you too much?"

Kyo relaxed when Die called scene, kissing Die back then shifting closer to him to wrap his arms around his waist. He shook his head at the question, smiling a little. "Not in the least...it was perfect..."

Die eased Kyo's pants the rest of the way off and then tugged him completely against his body. He smiled against his shoulder, resting his head there. "It... was."

The vocalist moved around to help Die with his pants then nuzzled into his embrace. He let out a soft sigh, his fingers going to push through Die's hair. "You should wear suits more often..."

"You really got off on that, hmm?" Die smiled softly at the other, rubbing idly at his stomach.

Kyo chuckled lowly, licking his lips after. "Mm, I really did...you're gorgeous all dressed up. Even more so with a commanding air about you."

Die just smiled at him, his eyelids heavy already. "Mmm... I admit it was fun." He reached to tug at the other's short blonde locks for a moment before releasing them.

Kyo hummed, leaning over to kiss his lover deeply. "Good. After Yakan's wedding...you can be my 'Boss' again."

"I have no argument over that at all, darling." Die gently tapped under Kyo's chin. "You know what I like most?"

Kyo gave a yawn, squeezing his eyes shut for a few moments then opening them up once again. "Hmm?"

"That I didn't flip out after."

Kyo grinned widely, tugging a strand of Die's hair. "Yeah, I really like that, too..."

"I love you," Die murmured, leaning in to press a light kiss to Kyo's nose before rolling over. "What is it about sex that makes one so damn tired?"

The vocalist smiled softly, shifting around and getting comfortable. "I love you, too, Koi." He gave another yawn and stretched out, closing his eyes. "I don't know...but it does."

"Mmm... nap then. We're adults... and we can nap if we want to." Die rolled onto his side and curled up, yawning widely and then huffing out a soft laugh.

Kyo laughed and shifted so that he could wrap his arm around Die's waist. "Mmhmm, that's right. We can nap if we wanna," he mumbled out, sleep already claiming him.


	72. Chapter 72

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Things had been rough for both Die and Kyo for the past few weeks. Kyo had somehow come down with a rather terrible flu, involving all the horrible parts that Die would have rather never happened in the first place, being the one taking care of his lover. But, he supposed, with the amount of times Kyo had dealt with him while he'd been sick or just hung over, he deserved a bit on the reciprocation end of things. And thus, he'd taken care of him, waited on him hand and foot for the duration of the illness.

Between work and running himself ragged keeping the house up and trying to keep Kyo cleaned up and as comfortable as possible - all while figuring out doctors appointments to ensure this was only a flu - Die had neglected everything else. But Kyo was on the mend finally, seemed much brighter and hadn't lost his lunch in three days. He still seemed weak to Die, like someone who had definitely been through hell for a bit, but better nonetheless.

For the first time in what felt like forever, Die took his time in the shower, washed and conditioned his hair leisurely, and scrubbed his body nearly pink before he left the steamy room. With his hair dried and styled, he put on clean clothing - thanks to the night before spent doing laundry - and made his way to work. Once there, he'd settled in and started on revising the solo he'd meant to have done almost a month prior, intent on his work and completely in the zone.

Kyo might have seemed weak, but it was nothing compared to what he'd been through for the last half month. He was just relieved that he could actually eat and not lose it in one way or another. That and his throat had finally stopped hurting and feeling raw. He was still a tad hoarse, but no longer sounded like a choking frog when he spoke.

He'd been fearful that Die would catch whatever plague it was that decided to befall him. It seemed to have been kept at bay, however, by Die's fastidious cleaning and disinfecting. Not even the cats were allowed in their room while he was ill, and his poor lover had slept on the couch. 

Now, he was actually up and moving around, taking care of a few light chores, as well as cooking a hearty nabe dish for Die. Kaoru had forbidden him to enter the studio until he went to one more doctor's appointment, so he had plenty of free time, though he was starting to hate being cooped up.

Die took his time getting through the solo, working out the kinks within it. Finally, he booked his time in the recording booth and then waited. Once he was finally inside, he put his headphones on and poured himself into the music, going through it again and again until he had it perfect. Hours later, he emerged from the booth, looking completely tired and worn out. He craved a cigarette like nothing else, but those were days long past, and he avoided Kaoru for fear of trying to bum one off of him. Finally, he packed his stuff up and headed out, dragging his sorry ass to the car and climbing in.

By the time Kyo was finished with the stew he was cooking, it was late evening, and Die had yet to return home. Frowning, he set the food to simmer on low and washed his hands before pulling his phone out and dialing his lover's number.

Die had thankfully hooked his phone up on the hands free, through the speakers on his car. When it began to ring, he hit the button on the steering wheel and answered with a quiet, "Andou speaking."

Kyo snorted softly into the receiver at Die's formal greeting. "Niimura here...just wondering when Mr. Andou is coming home."

A quiet laugh left Die's mouth. "Mmm... I'm in the car. Tell lover boy it'll probably be about half an hour with this traffic."

The vocalist laughed and checked his watch, humming softly. "Alright. Lover boy says to skip the take-out tonight, and be safe driving. Love you."

"Will do. Love you, too, darling." Die hit the button again, turning off the call, his music coming back through the speakers again as he drove along. It took a while for him to get home, but once he arrived, he parked the car, gathered his things and made his way into the house, dragging his feet the whole way. 

Kyo hung up with Die and went to settle himself on the couch, still not up to full speed. He ended up in a light doze, his head resting on his hand.

Die finally got his shoes off and then his bag stowed away. He made his way to the living room, pausing to see Kyo dozing, and then padded off into the kitchen where he smelled the delightful scents the other had created there. He very quietly dished out a serving and fished out a beer from the fridge, settling down on the couch next to Kyo in a manner so as to not wake him up. He turned on the TV, but kept it on mute, just gazing at the subtitles while he began to eat.

Kyo dozed for another 15 minutes after Die settled next to him, finally awakening to the clink of chopsticks on a bowl. He snuffled and rubbed his eyes, turning to peer at his lover with a sleepy smile. "Hey, why didn't you wake me?," he questioned, leaning over without waiting for an answer to press his lips to Die's cheek.

Die gave a little shrug when Kyo spoke, smiling faintly. "You need your rest."

The vocalist huffed a little, moving to stand up, his stomach growling from the smell of Die's food. "That's all I've done for the past two and a half weeks! I'm tired of it," he complained, shuffling off to the kitchen. 

He came back in a few moments with his own bowl of food and a bottle of tea, curling up next to Die. He tucked his feet under him and settled in. "You look like you're about to pass out."  
"And yet... you _were_ sleeping," Die pointed out between bites. Finally, he finished off his food and put the bowl aside, finishing off his beer and leaning back, his eyes still on the screen, though he turned on the volume now, just faintly in the background.

"Yeah, well... long couple weeks, hmm?"

Kyo huffed and started to eat, going at it slowly just in case. "Indeed. I think after tomorrow's appointment, I can finally get back to work. I feel like a caged rat being basically on bed rest and trapped at home." He made a face then took another bite, swallowing it down with his tea.

"Yeah, I can feel you there," Die returned quietly, his eyes on the music video currently playing. He had no interest in the song, but the dancing caught his eyes in a good variety of ways, and he could feel himself getting aroused at an alarmingly quick rate over something so simple. He crossed his legs so as to hide it, used to doing so the past few weeks now. He'd not had the time or energy to do anything to himself, and they certainly hadn't been having relations with Kyo being ill.

Die gestured at the screen with a flick of his bangled wrist. "Is it me or are these videos getting racier each time they come out with a new one?"

Kyo finished off his food, washing the rest down with his drink then settling against Die, leaning into his side. He peered at the TV, watching the dancing with slight interest. "I think you're right. They might as well just fuck on screen at this point."

Even as Die's arousal grew, he kept it quite to himself. The only giveaway at all was the slight tightening of his fist, though he'd already had his hand that way, so it didn't honestly do much in that respect. Soon enough, his cock was rock hard in his pants, his balls tight, and he had to force his breathing to be regulated rather than shallow. For a stupid music video, it certainly had him going as if it were actually porn... or more.

Kyo was oblivious to Die's arousal at first, but when the redhead started breathing oddly, he turned his head to peer at him. The flush on his lover's cheek told all there was to tell, and he smirked a little, feeling a little spike of lust himself. "Quite the physical display, hm? The way they move against one another..."

Die was quick to realize that Kyo knew he was getting turned on by the stupid video. Of course he'd know... how long had he known Die? How long had they been sleeping together, if nothing else? He grunted a bit, glad as it ended, and then started flipping through channels. He ended up on the news, watching something about baseball scores, though for about the first time in history, he didn't hear a thing the newscaster was saying.

The vocalist watched his lover carefully, huffing a little when he changed to sport. He leaned against him further, pressing his face against his neck. "You know...I think this is a record...we haven't slept together in three weeks. We've never gone that long…"

Die's face flushed a bit as Kyo spoke about them not having slept together in a long while. He let out a small sound of acknowledgement and then murmured, "Yeah, it has been a while, hmm?"

Kyo licked his lips there against Die's skin, smirking. "Too long."

After a moment, Die grunted and then murmured something under his breath in English about sicknesses and curses to the person who decided it'd be nice to get Kyo sick, before leaning forward to peer at the score on a Giant's game.

Kyo blinked at the English, not understanding any of it other than sick and a couple of curse words. He frowned and sat back up, grabbing the remote. Grumpily, he flipped it back to the music station, another racy video displaying on the screen.

There were only a few seconds of Die staring at the new images on the screen before he tensed up. A second later, he shuddered harshly, his dick straining in his pants, and then he was cumming. Shock filtered over his face, a strangled gasp leaving him before he clamped a hand over his mouth in an attempt to not make a complete scene, cum pulsing out into his jeans.

Kyo snapped his head around as Die convulsed next to him, a slightly concerned look on his face. Concern turned to amusement, however, when he noticed just what had happened. He glanced down at Die's jeans, seeing the damp spot forming and huffed out a breath. "Jesus, Die...I had no idea that would do it for you..."

Die turned bright red at that statement, ducking his head. A second later, he pushed up off the couch, humiliation sweeping through him. Then it hit him, he could play it off. Pretend that wasn't it. 

He waved a hand and let out, "It's not what you think; I have to pee!" With that, he bolted for the downstairs bathroom, slamming the door and yanking at his clothing to get rid of the evidence, grabbing toilet paper as he pushed up the toilet lid, trying to get to himself to get the cum out before Kyo inevitably came in.

Kyo stared after Die, eyebrow raised high at the other's quick excuse. A frown crossed his features as he stood up, padding over to the bathroom and knocking. "Die? What's wrong with you? You're acting so jumpy..."

By some miracle, Die got his pants cleaned out, though it was still incredibly obvious it wasn't at all what he'd said it was if Kyo opened the door. For one, he was still so hard he couldn't even manage to urinate at all. And for two, he smelled like cum, and he damn well knew it.   
When Kyo asked the question, he let out a small whine and bowed his head, just waiting on Kyo to find him out, knowing he would. When the guitarist didn't answer, Kyo simply opened the bathroom door, invading his privacy. Die's cock was still tenting out his pants, and there was the obvious scent of musk in the room. 

A soft sigh left him and he leaned against the doorframe, eyes not leaving Die's crotch. "So you just jizzed yourself with no stimulation and you're still hard as a rock...but you're...embarrassed?"

Well... there it was, right out there, wasn't it? Die's jaw worked for a moment before he threw the paper into the toilet and flushed it, doing his damnedest to do up his pants in the meantime. He glanced at Kyo and then away again, sighing. "Look... I'm sorry. And I don't know what the hell just happened, but I feel like a twelve year old boy all over again. Definitely not one of my finer moments in life." 

Die moved to close the lid and then wash his hands, making sure to remove all his rings first and do a really good job before drying and putting them back on, finally looking at Kyo again.

Kyo stood there with his arms crossed, somewhat unsure of why Die was freaking out so bad. Sure, it was little embarrassing, maybe a bit hilarious, but it wasn't any worse than a wet dream, right? He sniffed and shrugged his shoulders, gesturing to Die's crotch. "Why didn't you just tell me you were in need? I might be recovering from the flu but my hands still work...."

Die studied Kyo for a moment before shrugging and then mumbling, "It's not like I've had any time to do anything about it either... where was I going to find time for _us_ to do it if I couldn't myself even?"

Kyo rubbed his hand through his hair and shrugged. "I don't know...you're usually pretty good at grabbing a quick 5 minutes or so to jerk off...even on our most intense days of recording..."

For a moment, Die just stood there, completely stunned by Kyo's response. After a moment, hurt filtered in on top of it, and his face fell, pain reflecting clearly in his eyes. Somehow everything was going all wrong here. First he'd humiliated himself and now this... After a moment, he skirted past Kyo and headed right for the back patio. "Let's... talk out here." 

He didn't want to argue in front of the neighbors, but he'd be damned if he wasn't craving that cigarette a million times more now than he had been at the studio. He pushed out into the yard and snatched up the pack and the lighter, doing as he always did when he needed to smell one, putting it between his lips and fumbling with the lighter.

Kyo felt a pang of regret as Die moved past him and headed outside. It was never a good thing when his lover wanted to talk outside, and he sighed as he turned and followed him out there. He stepped onto their porch and settled on the first step leading to their yard, just watching the guitarist.

Once Die got the cigarette lit thought, he didn't stop there. He took in a deep drag of it, holding it for a few seconds, and then breathed it out as he sank down onto the back porch step. "Okay... truth hour. What'd I say wrong?"

Kyo sighed and shook his head as Die actually inhaled. He scrubbed his hands over his face, frowning. "I was going to ask you the same question..."

Die stared down at the cigarette, watching it burn between his thumb and forefinger, wetting his lips a bit and shaking his head a little. "Honestly? I don't know what's going on other than I have honest to god been so focused on work and trying to stay well, and... you," he said the last part like he didn't actually want to say it, fear that Kyo would take it wrong heavy in his voice," that I didn't do anything myself, and I was trying to hold out until you were well...." He shrugged a little and pulled the cigarette back up, taking another tiny drag off it before tossing it to the ground and putting it out, holding in that bit until he couldn't anymore.

Kyo shifted around, a guilty look on his face now. "I'm sorry...you were freaking out and...I don't know. I guess I was just a bit concerned about how you were taking it..."  
Die shrugged a little. "I feel stupid."

Kyo stood up then and moved to grasp Die's hand. "It's okay...I feel selfish. So, we're even."

"You're in no way selfish," Die returned as he weaved his fingers with Kyo's own. "You've been sick. There's a very big difference between the two."

Kyo huffed a little and squatted down, bringing Die's hand to his lips, kissing it. "I know, but still...I should have just gone to my parents' place or something instead of forcing it on you during such a busy time...."

"What? No!" Die grasped Kyo's hand in both of his own, giving him a worried look. "No. Kyo... I'm with you. Thick or thin, sickness and health..." he trailed off, realizing he was pretty much giving him wedding vows, a topic he'd been avoiding like the plague for a while now given they'd stopped talking about it, and he was loathe to be the one always pressing.

After a moment, he quietly offered, "Don't say that, please. I want to be the one who takes care of you. Please let me be."

Kyo licked his lips, ducking his head a bit as Die pretty much recited wedding vows to him. He finally lifted his head up, a small smile on his face as he leaned forward, pressing his lips softly to Die's. "Of course, Koi...You can always take care of me." He cupped Die's cheek, laughing softly. "After all, you always have..."  
Die offered him a small smile and then lifted one shoulder ever so faintly. "And I always will if I have anything to say about it."

The vocalist nodded a little, leaning in to kiss Die's lips again. "Agreed," he murmured quietly.

Die grunted faintly, staring down at the cigarette and then breathing out a quiet sigh. "Killed like what... three years’ worth of not smoking? And for us working it out in like five minutes." He glanced at Kyo and gave him a sheepish look. "Can we pretend I didn't?"

Kyo's eyes flicked to then burning ember and shook his head. He stood and gently plucked the cigarette from Die's fingers, bending down to snuff it out. "Pretend you didn't do what?"

Die flicked his gaze up to his lover and then breathed out a quiet, but thankful, little sound. He reached for Kyo then, tugging him close and pressing his head to the other's stomach from his seated position. He pushed the fabric of the other's shirt up and nuzzled in, a tiny smile on his lips. "Does not change the fact that I'm horny as fuck."

Kyo grinned slightly, his hand going to rest atop Die's head. He toyed with the other's red locks for a moment, smirking. "I think I'm well enough to assist you in that matter..."

Die moved to shove his face directly against Kyo's stomach and then sighed, murmuring a soft, "Are you sure? I mean... I don't want to exert you and make you sick again."

Kyo hugged Die's head to him, stroking his hair and then down his back. He hummed softly, shrugging a little. "I think so....I did manage to fix supper without collapsing."

"And it was very good, thank you for that." Die kissed the skin in front of him and then pulled back, gazing up at the other.

The vocalist smiled a little, shrugging. "It was just a simple recipe...but you're welcome." He stepped back and held out his hand. "Let's go inside...it's getting a little chilly out here..."

Die nodded a little, pulling himself up with Kyo's help and trudging back inside, tossing the pack of cigarettes and lighter back into the planter on the way past. "I guess it's a comfort knowing I could stop there at least..."

Kyo followed along behind Die, letting out a little sound of agreement. "Yeah, I'm glad you can...because if you started again, I'm not sure I could stop myself from starting with you." He wrinkled his nose the moved past Die into the kitchen to put the food away.

"Not good... and all that much more incentive to keep me from it." Die moved to the counter, leaning on it while he watched Kyo put the food up.  
Kyo nodded, putting the top on the pot and sticking it in the fridge. He made sure everything else was put away then moved to rinse his hands quickly, drying them on the dish towel. Done with that, he moved back over to Die, slipping his arms around his waist. "Admittedly, I do miss it sometimes..."

"Yeah... me, too. Especially when I'm stressing out." Die leaned down to kiss Kyo's forehead and then slid his arm around him, moving him with him toward the stairs. "Guest room... unless you've been a busy bee and changed all the bedding." He himself had just been avoiding upstairs the whole time, paranoid of even using that bathroom when he wasn't in mask and ready to wash up constantly so as to not end up sick himself.

Kyo nodded then moved towards his stairs. "Ah, no, I didn't get that far...so guest room it is." He started slowly climbing upwards, still taking it easy.

Die went ahead, opening the door and moving the comforter off the bed, then pulling down the sheets. Kyo could sleep in here tonight, maybe even with Die if he was truly feeling better. He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it aside, settling back and unfastening his belt, then lowering his zipper, glancing at the door.

Kyo slipped into the room shortly after Die, watching as the other began to undress. He followed suit, getting his clothing out of the way and moving to settle on the edge of the bed. "C'mere, gorgeous..."

Die almost wanted to whine. He'd sort of been hoping for Kyo to get on his knees and suck him. But apparently he'd not really delivered that idea very well. He pushed himself up, stepping aside and pushing his pants off, giving up on pretense. He supposed this was sort of about need anyway for now. Moving over to the other, he gently pushed on Kyo's shoulder. "Move back and lay down."

Kyo pursed his lips and shook his head. "No, you lay back...I want to taste you. It's been a little too long."

Die blinked at the other, now utterly lost. For a moment, he just paused, letting his brain process what it was achingly slow at right then. After a moment, he just accepted it and moved to the left of Kyo, lying down on his side and just propping himself up with his arm. "My brain is really slow to catch up right now... just warning you."

Kyo cocked his head, frowning. "I'm sorry...I guess I'm sending mixed signals tonight." He reached out and ran his hand over Die's hip, feeling a little awkward about things now.

Die tugged the other close to him with a soft sound. "Shh... it's okay, darling." He pressed his lips against Kyo's hair and then closed his eyes. "I'm not thinking clearly right now."

Kyo shifted and lay down beside Die, nuzzling against his neck. He kept stroking his lover's hip, eventually moving to cup and squeeze his behind. "It's settled then. We can never go this long without having sex again," he quipped, a small smile on his lips.

A quiet laugh huffed up from Die, the guitarist shaking his head. "Yeah, I'll say."

Kyo tilted his head up to catch Die's lips in a deep kiss, letting things heat up between them as his hand finally moved around to slide over the other's length. He gave a soft groan, shifting a bit to begin stroking the guitarist, his own arousal growing.

The moment Kyo's mouth caught Die's own, the guitarist simply lost his ability to wait any longer. Within a moment, he had Kyo on his back, rolling them over as he pressed his leg between the other's thighs, trying to urge his legs open.

Kyo let out a surprised sound as he was flipped over. He didn't fight it though, somewhat eagerly opening his legs for his lover, a soft whimper escaping him.

"I want to fuck you," Die breathed out, pushing his lover's legs far enough apart and then stopping, staring down between them and sighing. No lube... that was great. "Hang on," he murmured, pushing himself up and darting out of the room to go get the lube.

Kyo groaned, reaching down to grasp his dick for a moment then nodding. "I want you to fuck me," he breathed out, a shudder going through him. When Die left the room, he shifted around a bit, grabbing a pillow and putting it under his butt for a better angle. He settled once more, though found himself unable to stop touching himself.

Die came back quickly with the lube, his dick obviously already lubed as well. He slid onto the bed between his lover's knees and then settled, slick fingers plunging into the other eagerly.

Kyo grinned at Die as he returned, reaching up to grip his shoulder as the other's fingers plunged into him. He let out a soft cry, jerking his hips up slightly, his body clenching around the intrusion. "Gods..."

For once, Die didn't back off, thrusting into the other's tight passage over and over. Kyo groaned, dropping his hand to grip the sheets instead. "Die...Gods..."

After a few moments, Die finally pulled his fingers free and moved to push into the other's body with a sharp groan. The instant he was inside Kyo's tight heat, he couldn't even begin to help himself. He simply started to thrust, his body moving over Kyo's near desperately.

Everything moved fast, and it wasn't but a few minutes later that Die was pushing into his body, pulling a loud moan from Kyo. The vocalist eagerly bucked his hips up, panting already from the exertion.  
Die just tucked his head down against the other's neck as he flat-out humped him, shivers going through his entire body as he moved. It was clear it was going to end relatively quickly for him, but he was pushing it as far as he could for as long as possible.

Kyo wrapped his legs around Die's waist, moaning rather loudly. His cock was rock hard between them at this point but he couldn't bring himself to break the rhythm of their actions.

Die groaned as he kept fucking Kyo, his mouth moving to suck at the other's neck, though he did his best to make sure he wasn't actually making any marks. It was enough that Kyo had left him bitten up on the US tour, and it'd ended up in the DVD - something Kaoru had had a lovely talk with him about today. But to do it in Japan was probably worse somehow, less likely he was fucking a random fangirl these days, and definitely right out in the public eye. Much less Kyo having a mark... what would Kaoru say then?   
The thought almost made Die want to leave one behind just to see. But he didn't do it, didn't push it. Instead, he started licking at the area as he pounded into Kyo's body, moaning for all he was worth.

Kyo trembled beneath Die, his hand moving to dig into the other's red locks, tugging harshly as he sucked at his neck. "O-oh…Die!"

Die groaned when Kyo tugged his hair, hissing out, "Do it again," his hips snapping even harder against Kyo's body.

The vocalist complied, yanking hard on his lover's hair as he bucked his hips up wildly.  
It only took Die a few more seconds before he sank deep inside Kyo and stilled there, groaning as he filled the other's passage with his cum. It was embarrassingly fast, but he honestly couldn't help it, too riled up to hold it back any longer.

The minute he felt Die's release flowing into him, Kyo gave his hair a final harsh tug then released his locks to finally dip his hand between. "Don't move," he whispered out, his hand working his cock frantically.

Die just bowed his head, red locks barely grazing Kyo's shoulder as he watched between them, seeing Kyo's hand go for his own dick and then start jacking off. It was erotic... pleasant... beautiful. And Die stayed right where he was, just as he'd been asked.  
It didn't take Kyo long before he was nearing his peak. A shudder rippled through him then he was cumming all over his stomach in great spurts, a testament to how long it had been for him.

A low moan left Die's lips as Kyo started to cum, pulsing around him just seconds before he started to actually release. "Beautiful," Die murmured quietly.

Kyo eased back, lowering his legs and slipping his hand from his cock with a moan. He brought his soiled fingers up to Die's lips with a small smirk.

Die didn't even hesitate, just opening his mouth and waiting on the other to place the digits into his mouth.

Kyo slipped his fingers into Die's mouth with a soft groan, his thumb caressing his cheek. "So erotic..."

The guitarist shivered as he sucked at the other's fingers, his dick not fully softening, but slackening at least mostly, a relief if he were to tell the truth. Sex hadn't felt that relieving in a long time. He finished licking the cum from Kyo's fingers and then slowly pulled out, easing himself back shakily, shifting to the side and sort of face-planting. "I... wow."

Kyo shivered as Die fellated his fingers, his cock giving a slight twitch. Truth be told, he was worn out, but it had felt amazing, and if Die wanted to go again, he'd endure. With a huff of breath, he shifted onto his side, facing his lover. "Mmhmm...wow, indeed."

Die turned his head to the side to peer at Kyo, blinking sleepily at him. "Would you be mad if I just pass out now? Just... so relaxed."

Kyo let out a soft chuckle and scooted a bit closer to Die, reaching his arm out to lay his hand on his back. "Mm, not at all..."

"Good," Die breathed out, already looking about ninety percent asleep, right there, face down on the guest bed, heedless of everything else in the world. The vocalist smiled softly at his lover, reaching behind him to grab the blanket. He managed to get it over the both of them well enough and soon was joining the guitarist in sleep.


	73. Chapter 73

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Another week had passed since Kyo had recovered from the flu, and he was feeling more like his usual self. This was particularly true in the department of his sex drive and given that Kaoru was still insisting that he take it easy, he found himself with free time on his hands. 

So, after Die had left for the studio, he'd done a few chores then ended up searching endlessly for some porn to tickle his fancy. He was about to give up until he finally spotted something that had promise and loaded it up. It started to play, and he got comfortable on the couch, watching as the two men on screen "got to know each other." 

Admittedly, one of them looked rather similar to Die and could have been his cousin or something. This thought entertained Kyo as he finally started getting turned on, his pants tenting out a good bit. Midway through the movie, Kyo took his cock out and began leisurely stroking it as he watched the Die look-a-like get fucking into the mattress.

Die had finished up everything he needed to do at the studio very quickly for the day, recording the last solo he'd been avoiding and then redoing one part Kaoru and Toshiya had decided would sound better another way. With that done, he'd simply packed up and headed back toward home, happy to be out early so he could have a bit of a relaxing time with Kyo rather than constant cleaning up or go-go-go that his life had been as of late.

He had taken the train in that day, so when he arrived home, it was on foot, and the moment he had his key in the lock, he could hear the porn on the front TV. Amusement slid over his face. Finally... fucking finally, he was going to get to walk in on Kyo. After all this time. Opening the door, he didn't bother to take off his boots or put his bag down, just shutting the door and taking the few steps to take him into the living room so he could actually catch Kyo, not give him a chance to button up and put it all away.

Kyo didn't notice Die when he first walked in, his hand a blur over his cock as his pleasure ramped up. He let out a low moan then leaned his head back, hand moving to push into his own hair.

It wasn't until he opened his eyes to look at the screen that he noticed Die standing there. His cheeks flushed, and he stopped, giving his lover a slightly guilty look. "...welcome home..."

A grin spread over Die's face, his eyes completely on Kyo, not at all on what was happening on screen. He wet his lips and breathed out a quiet, "Quite a welcome home party. Can't say I'm complaining at all, though." Finally, he put his bag down, kneeling to unlace his boots, his eyes still on Kyo the whole time. "Don't let me stop you."

Kyo snorted softly, shifting on the couch slightly though not removing his hand. He used his free one to turn the TV down a little before smirking at his lover. He licked his lips and started stroking his cock once more, bucking his hips up into it.

Die finally got his boots removed and then just settled himself on the floor, watching Kyo with interest. Eventually he glanced away, too curious as to what got Kyo's dick all riled up like this. The instant he saw what was on screen though, he looked by all rights startled and perhaps a bit humiliated. His cheeks heated up, and he looked away quickly, closing his eyes and pinching his nose as he tried to vacate the images from his memory.

Kyo wasn't paying enough attention to Die's reaction to what was on the screen to notice his lover's apparent crisis. He let out a low moan then finally settled, dropping his hand to just cup his sac. He glanced at Die and blinked, confused about the look on his face. "Die....?"

Die pulled his hand away the instant Kyo spoke up, realizing he was having this meltdown right in front of the other. He peered up at him and then at his cock, trying to get rid of the image of Ichi's dick. "Hmm?"

Kyo tilted his head, glancing at the screen once more then flicking it off. "You looked like you were gonna be sick..."

Pursing his lips a little, Die shook his head. "I... uh... no, I'm fine." He tried to offer a small smile to the other, though it obviously didn't meet his eyes very well.

Kyo frowned a little, pulling his hand away from his cock and easing his pants over it for now. "You don't look fine…what is it?"

Die looked a bit perplexed for a moment, finally murmuring, "Video... just..." he shrugged, at a loss for words, not wanting to say what was actually on his mind. "Made the mistake of looking at that instead of you. Shouldn't have."

Kyo glanced at the TV then back to Die. "Die, spit it out...please? What about the video? It was hot..."

Giving up, Die sort of wilted. "You know how I've avoided Coat West all this time? How every single time it comes on, I sort of make an excuse and leave, or else just say I don't like it or suggest another one?"

Kyo thought about it for a moment then nodded. "Yeah, which I always thought was odd, but never paid much attention..."

"Yeah... well," he jerked his thumb at the TV. "Ichi there... the one with the highlights..." Die cleared his throat. "You've been jerking off to my cousin."

Kyo stared at Die, his mouth agape. "Your...cousin?!" Immediately, he turned the TV back on, staring long and hard at the one Die indicated before letting out an indignant sound. "Dear gods...." He wasn't even sure how to react. He felt an odd sense of guilt coupled with arousal. Ichi was hot and like a younger version of Die.

Die watched Kyo and the plethora of emotions rolling over him. He loosely crossed his arms, amusement tugging at the corners of his lips before he shook his head. "We... don't like to talk about it. I mean, it's not a big deal to me personally, but my Aunt hates it... and frankly, if the fans found out, we'd have a problem, so I don't make a habit of mentioning it."

Kyo sniffed, crossing his legs. "I...see." He gestured towards the TV. "I'm your fiancé.....you might have mentioned it to me. Especially considering our porn habit..."

Die looked a bit sheepish. After a moment, he released a laugh and gestured. "Honestly... the look on your face was more amusing... and possibly worth the mental torment of the fact that I have now seen my cousin's erect dick."

The vocalist huffed at his lover, crossing his arms. "Yeah, but what about my dick?? Now I'm in pain..." He practically pouted at Die, lips pursed.

"Well," Die murmured, leaning back on his hands. "I think something might be able to be arranged there for you."

Kyo raised an eyebrow. "And what's that?"

"I haven't even jerked off today yet," Die murmured, arching his eyebrow at Kyo, a tiny smirk on his lips.

"You haven't? Have you needed to? _Wanted_ to?"

"Yes, I definitely wanted to. But I thought I'd come home and fuck you instead," Die returned quietly.

Kyo licked his lips, smirking a little. "Mm, is that so?"

Die groaned. "Get the fuck over here, jackass."

Kyo chuckled and shifted off of the couch, crawling over to his lover and straddling his legs. "So pushy..."

"Damn right I am." Die tugged Kyo closer and then pressed his face against his lover's neck. Chuckling, he murmured, "So... tell me then. Does it still turn you on?"

Kyo chuckled, pushing his fingers through Die's hair. "Mm, honestly...yes. It was fucking hot."

"And if you ever meet him... will you be thinking of his dick and how the other one had his dick up Ichi's ass?" Die wasn't sure why he was doing this, but somehow he thought it was going to arouse the other.

Kyo groaned softly, squirming astride Die's lap. "Mmm....probably... I wouldn't be able to help it."

Die smirked, pressing his lips against the other's ear and breathing out, "I'm okay with it if you still want to watch him in videos... just not with me, yeah?"

The vocalist shuddered, tugging Die's hair slightly. "I'll consider that...because I was half thinking of you anyway..."

"Just... don't call me him, and we're good." Die let out a quiet laugh and then nipped up under his chin before flopping back. "I demand you do the work now."

Kyo laughed then shifted until his ass was pressed against Die's cock. "That won't be a problem...and if you insist..." He smirked and reached for the remote once again, turning their stereo on to a song before beginning to slowly sway and rock his hips to the beat.

Die put his arms behind his head, watching Kyo as he ground himself against him. Licking his lips, he grinned at the other as he kept moving against him. "You're gorgeous like this, darling," he murmured softly.

Kyo grinned as he undulated atop Die, the music growing faster. Eventually, he pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it aside then leaning down to lick Die's Adam's apple, his ass grinding roughly over his cock.

"Kyo," he murmured quietly, "my dick is going to die trapped in here."

The vocalist huffed softly and sat back up, wriggling down until he was more on Die's knees. "I take it you would like me to let it out?"

"Please?" Die gave Kyo a pleading look, chuckling just after.

Kyo peered at Die for a few moments, drawing out the moment before finally reaching to undo Die's pants. He stroked his hand over his lover's bulge then tugged his pants and boxers down enough to free him from their confines. He ran the tip of his finger along the length of his cock, smirking up at the guitarist. "Is that better?"

Die breathed out a sigh of relief when the other freed him. He groaned as his dick was actually touched, a smirk on his lips. "Much."

The vocalist grinned then shifted so that he could position himself between Die's legs. Leaning down, he took the tip of the other's cock between his lips, giving it a hard suck then lifting his head to lap at it like a lollipop.

"Christ," Die breathed out, gently touching Kyo's head and petting over his hair. "You make me want to fuck your damn throat the moment you get ahold of me, you know that?"

Kyo flicked his eyes up to Die's face, pulling back to lick his lips. "Mm, I love it when you're eager. It makes my cock throb." He lowered his head back down, taking Die's length between his lips once again, sliding his mouth down about halfway.

"I'm always eager... just sometimes more vocal about it." Die reached to gently touch the other's cheek instead for a moment, then went back to rubbing at his hair, enjoying the feeling of it under the pads of his fingers.

Kyo hummed around Die's cock, starting to bob his head up and down, building a slow rhythm. As he worked, he slid his hand up to push under Die's shirt, scratching his belly then going up to pinch his nipple, tugging it lightly.

Die grunted faintly, closing his eyes and pushing his hips up toward the other. "God... you're so good at this." Die gave it a few more seconds before he rubbed at his hair and then tugged slightly. "Come on... ride me, darling."

Kyo groaned lowly, giving Die's cock a few more good sucks before lifting his head. He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and stood up, kicking his pants off completely. Once he was done, he tugged Die's pants down more before straddling him once again. Smirking, he reached back and steadied Die's cock as he started pushing down onto it, his passage already lubricated, something he'd done earlier in anticipation of a lengthy self-session.

"Oh my god," Die bit out, fear of hurting Kyo spiking through him before he felt the other's lubricated warmth around him, a sigh of relief forcing its way out. He chuckled softly after a few moments. "You little fucker..."

Kyo grunted lowly as he fully seated himself on Die's cock, a shudder rippling through him. He gave Die a wide grin, rocking his hips slightly. "I was planning on having a bit of fun with your lovely red glass dildo..."

"Tell me more," Die breathed out, his head tilting back, hips pushing up.

The vocalist moaned as Die pushed upward. He rocked forward then back, bouncing on Die for a moment. "I was going to sit on the couch and fuck myself nice and slow with it." He gestured to the couch, pointing out the bit of red poking out from behind a throw pillow.

Die looked up to see the toy, biting at his lower lip before he groaned and reached for his hips, holding onto him, his eyelids sliding closed. "God... I should have waited a few minutes to come home... catch you like that... it's a dream come true."

Kyo slid his hands up Die's chest, pushing his shirt out of the way. He leaned down to press his face against Die's neck, nipping at his earlobe, murmuring, "I'll keep that in mind..."

"Sometimes," Die breathed out as he started to move his hips, "I fantasize about you... doing things to yourself while I watch... like you used to back in the day, before I caught you that night."

Kyo shuddered, rocking back with Die's movements. "Yeah? What sorts of things turn you on the most?"

"Thinking about you doing kinky things I don't know about... fetishes you've just forgotten to tell me or dirty secrets." Die shivered as he spoke, finally starting to fuck up into his as hard as he could from beneath, which honestly wasn't much.

The vocalist smirked, an idea taking root in his head for another time. He shifted back up, running his hands down Die's arms, resting them on top of the other's on his hips. He started lifting up and pushing back down, gasping as Die's cock brushed his prostate.

Die groaned as the other started to ride him, his hips pushing up toward him. "I want you... fuck, I want you to keep doing this so bad."

Kyo went along eagerly with Die's wishes, starting to practically bounce on his cock. He let out a breathless moan, his head leaning back as he moved. "Feels so...fucking good!"

Die groaned as the other started to go after him faster. "Fuck... yes!"

Kyo focused on riding Die's dick, bouncing harder, wanting more. " _Yes_!"

Reaching up, Die groped at the other's pecks and then ran his fingers down over Kyo's stomach, making sure everything was a ghost of a touch to get Kyo even harder up. Die's attempts to tease him worked, his body straining as he labored over his lover. He was panting by then and his cock was ruddy with desire.

Die finally let his fingers drop down to trace over Kyo's dick, gathering up pre-cum and then sliding it down over the piercing there.

As soon as Die touched his cock, he let out a cry, his hips jerking. The other's fingers on his piercing made him throb, and he stilled, gazing down at Die, his chest rising and falling as he fought to catch his breath some. "Pull on it," he murmured, shivering after.

There wasn't any hesitation at all in Die's actions, just slicking his fingers off on his dick and then grasping the piercing, tugging lightly on it. "Like this?"

The vocalist's hips jerked forward as a shock of arousal went through him. "Oh fuck...yeah, just like that..."

Die tugged on it again, watching the other as he squirmed around on top of him. "Come on," he breathed out, and then in English, "Cum on me, mother fucker."

Kyo moaned, lifting his ass up even as Die tugged his piercing and uttered some of the few English words he knew. He slammed back down hard onto Die's cock, ramming his prostate as he did. With a stuttered cry, he began cumming hard, spurting all over Die's hand and stomach. "F-fuck!"

Die panted out, "You follow instructions like a charm." A second later, he flipped them over and started to outright rut against him, fucking him as hard as he could, uncaring about the carpet burns he'd probably have on his knees later.

Kyo offered a slight smirk before grunting as his back met the floor. He wrapped his arms around Die, dragging his nails down his back. "You hit all the right spots..."

Die groaned as he leaned down and licked over his Adam's apple. After a few moments, he tensed and then he was cumming as well, filling Kyo's passage.

Kyo shivered, pushing his hips up as Die began cumming, tightening his passage around his lover's cock. He stroked his hand up to push into his hair, yanking slightly then settled back with a soft groan.

Die chuckled as the other yanked on his hair, pushing into him a few more times and then pulling out, though still hovering over him.

Kyo licked his lips, gazing up at Die, his hand moving to stroke over his chest. "Mm...gorgeous..."

"So are you, darling." Die kissed him sweetly on the lips for a moment before he pulled back and smirked.

Kyo relished the kiss then settled back, rolling his hips up a bit as he licked his lips.

Die pulled out, breathing a sigh against Kyo's neck as he did so, kissing at his neck a few more times before he settled on his knees and smiled at the other. "Next time you get a whole bunch of ideas about watching my cousin fuck whichever random dude he's going after, just tell me you want porn of someone like me." He gave Kyo a sheepish look and then breathed out, "There's some out there you don't know about.... a bit more up your alley, given it's not my cousin."

Kyo shivered a bit, gazing up at Die with a slightly raised eyebrow. "Mm, is that so?" he purred out. "I find it erotic that you watch porn of guys that look like you."

"Oh... not just _look_ like me." Die returned, huffing out a little laugh.

Kyo pushed himself up on his elbows, laughing as well. "Oh?"

"I made a few small mistakes as a young man. Look hard enough, and I'm sure you'll find them."

Kyo sat there, his mouth falling open. "Are you...saying what I think you're saying?" Daisuke...are you serious??"

Die flushed a little and then shrugged. "It's all amateur stuff, just home video, but... yeah, it's out there. I deleted it once we started getting bigger. But that doesn't mean someone didn't copy and re-upload it. At least it was all before this," he lifted his hand to show his tattoo, "So it's hard to know... and I didn't show my face. But... yeah... small mistakes."

Kyo huffed softly, sitting up fully and shaking his head. "You're going to have to show me..." He looked at Die, snorting incredulously. "My little porn star..."

"I can show you the copies I have. Hell if I know where they are online, but... that good enough?" Die chuckled at Kyo's snort, always amused by his lover when he did that. "And... no telling."

Kyo nodded a bit, reaching out to pull Die in for a kiss. "Imagine if we hadn't made it big...you'd be a porn star, and I'd be some lonely perv sitting at home fapping to you every night." He laughed and shook his head, flopping back.

Die smirked, reaching to lightly pad his fingers over Kyo's belly. "And it'd be a damn fine setup there."

Kyo's stomach twitched lightly at the touch, a smile playing on his lips. "Mm, you think? I'd be so lonely, though. Maybe I'd come to one of those crazy fan meetings they have and offer you a ton of money to be my plaything."

Die tapped his stomach and then slid his fingers down over Kyo's softened length, a smirk on his lips. "If you came with that all up and ready, I'd be all up and ready to let you without a ton of money, I'm sure."

Kyo's hips jerked slightly at the touch, a huff of breath escaping him. "Is that so? You'd be my little pet just because you like the way my cock fills your sweet ass?"

"If I were a porn star, it'd be a step up to have only one cock filling my ass, right? And then to find out there was this amazing man behind it... all that much better."

Kyo hummed, a slight feeling of pride swelling in his chest. "Mm, I like that last part the best..."

"Me, too..." Die leaned down to kiss Kyo's stomach and then pulled back, beaming at his lover. "Okay... I declare it nap time."

Kyo brushed his fingers through Die's hair and nodded, stretching out. "I agree."

Flopping down beside his lover, Die yawned and then curled up alongside him, resting his head on Kyo's arm. Closing his eyes, he smacked his lips a few times, grinning just after at the childish action. "I love you, you fantastic mother fucker."

Kyo shifted onto his side and yawned widely before laughing at his lover. "I love you, too."


	74. Chapter 74

The days had stretched into weeks into nearly a month before things calmed down for them again. Die found himself rushing around doing things with the little band he'd picked up that performed anime songs and Kyo was off doing things with Sukekiyo. In all honesty, he felt strangely at ease, even rushing around. With his little project, he felt as if he understood a bit more of what Kyo felt when he pushed his creativity into other things.

Today, Kyo had received a ride in to practice with Sukekiyo, and Die had been out doing a bit of shopping since he hadn't in quite a while. But he'd also decided he was beyond done with their lack of visitation with one another and decidedly putting his foot down on the fact that it'd been almost a week since they'd been intimate... and even that had been rushed.

He arrived at the studio earlier than Kyo was scheduled to leave, making his way inside and down the hall to where he could hear them running through a song. For a while he just stood outside, but finally, he carefully slipped into the room, rather like a shadow, unseen, unheard, and definitely not making a nuisance of himself. He crouched by the door, watching and listening, his eyes on his lover, curiosity in his gaze.

As much as Kyo hated having no time to himself and Die, he was thoroughly enjoying seeing his creativity with Sukekiyo come to fruition. It left him artistically satisfied and brought him to new heights of release in that aspect. It gave him a different euphoria. 

It was in the midst of this euphoria in which he sang now, the rest of Sukekiyo playing behind him. He had his eyes closed and allowed the music to flow through him as he belted out the lyrics with perfect pitch, unaware of anything else at the moment.

Die just remained there, quiet as could be, watching Kyo as he moved around, as he sang his heart out. It was so different from Dir en grey, even the aura around the other completely and utterly changed from what Die was used to seeing when Kyo sang. Closing his eyes, he let it wash over him, allowing the swell of the notes and the tickle of Kyo's voice over his senses.

It was another couple of minutes before the song came to a close and Kyo finally opened his eyes. He turned to his bandmates, offering them a few notes as well as praise, an easy smile on his face. 

Calling it a day, he moved over towards the door to gather his stuff, and that was when he spotted his lover, hiding in the shadows. "Die? How long ago did you sneak in?" he questioned, unable to keep the smile on his face from spreading.

The instant the song ended, Die opened his eyes again, feeling somehow at peace, despite the frustrations he'd come there with. When Kyo spoke to him, he smiled, standing up and lowering his voice dramatically, "I am the night," he recited in English.

"Outside for a whole song and inside for the last one." Die laced his fingers with his lover's own, tugging him closer and leaning in to breathe, "Do they know?"

Kyo grinned, a hint of pride in his eyes. At Die's question, he leaned in, nodding his head before standing on tiptoes to press a soft kiss to Die's lips. "They know."

The look that came over Die's face expressed everything he felt in that moment: relief, pleasure, anticipation, and a great swelling of pride alongside a huge surge of affection. He pulled Kyo fully against him then, returning the kiss and then moving to press his cheek alongside Kyo's own, a grin tugging at his lips. "You have no idea how happy that makes me..."

Kyo watched the myriad of emotions cross Die's face, his own eyes mirroring the affection there. His arms slid around Die's waist, hugging him tightly. "Hnn…how could I not tell them? They had to accept me, and you are part of me." He turned and nuzzled into Die's neck for a moment, only pulling away when Takumi called a greeting out to Die.

Die was loathe to let go even after the greeting was called out, but he finally just whispered a quiet, "Thank you... thank you a million times over," before pulling himself back and moving to go and shake Takumi's hand. "Been a bit; how've you been?"

The vocalist pressed another quick kiss to Die's cheek then moved away reluctantly to begin packing up his stuff, chatting quietly with the other members about their plans for next practice session.

The other guitarist shook Die's hand enthusiastically, grinning from ear to ear as he nodded towards Kyo. "Not at good as you've been, obviously." He chuckled and picked up his guitar case, making ready to leave. "Never thought you'd actually seal the deal with him. I'm happy for you."

Die flushed a bit and then chuckled. "Well... I um..." he looked a bit awkward for a moment and then breathed out a laugh, shaking off that feeling. "Yeah... sooner than you'd have thought. In fact, before you were on staff with us... we just sort of kept it from everyone for a long time." He shrugged. "Now... things are different. We made a few decisions to benefit us, despite what public reaction may be to it."

Takumi let out his own laugh. "Really? Well, that's great...I hope it continues to work out." He patted Die on the shoulder then hefted up his guitar. "See you around!" he called, making his way out, waving to everyone else. 

"See ya," Die returned, a smile on his lips at the reaction. Obviously it hadn't terrified anyone here, and that made him hopeful that one day they could just tell the world and it'd be okay... that maybe... just maybe... their wedding might happen at some point.

Kyo waved to Takumi then picked up his bag, making his way over to Die. "I'm ready...unless," he lowered his voice, leaning in closer, "...you want a private performance." He pulled back, a combination of mischief and lust dancing in his eyes.

Die was shaken from his thoughts when his lover spoke up, smirking at him and crossing his arms over his chest as he straightened up. "I, in fact, demand to have my own private performance," he returned, looking infinitely amused.

The vocalist's mouth spread into a nearly devious grin as he turned on his heel and stepped over to the door. Everyone had left finally, so he locked the door and turned off all of the lights except one, leaving the room mostly in shadow. That done, he stepped back over to Die, sliding his arms around him and leaning in to kiss him deeply, pouring all of his desire and emotions into it.

Die watched Kyo, relaxing against the wall once again. When his lover came to him, he easily slipped his arms around him and kissed him back with equal fervor. After a few moments though, he pulled back and breathed out, "I want a performance, darling... you promised it, after all."

Kyo chuckled and nipped Die's bottom lip. "Mm, so I did." He shifted back slightly then dropped to his knees, hands stroking up Die's thighs as he leaned in to nuzzle his lover's crotch. "I've been...craving this."

Die almost wanted to laugh when Kyo dropped to his knees, clearly taking his words to mean he wanted a private sexual performance from him. He almost clarified what he'd meant, but then Kyo was telling him he'd craved him, and there was nothing in the world that could have stopped him from giving Kyo that taste right then.

Reaching down, he slid his hand through the other's spikey hair, offering a quiet, "Yeah... well... let's say you're not the only one who has been wanting something."

Kyo flicked his eyes up, smirking as he began undoing Die's belt then going after his pants. Once they were open, he ran his hand over the bulge in Die's pants before sliding it up to push his shirt out of the way, leaning in to nip his stomach.

A smooth groan left Die's lips the instant the other began touching him, his head falling back and hitting the wall behind him. "Oh _fuck_ ," he breathed out, "baby... tell me you're gonna suck it. _Please._ "

A shiver rippled down Kyo's spine at Die's words. He'd wanted to draw it out a bit, but who was he to deny his lover? Especially when he begged so prettily. He shifted back and slid his hands over Die's hips before catching his pants and pushing them down out of his way. "Beg some more for me, Daisuke...," he murmured, leaning in to blow air over his lover's now exposed length.

The action sent a tremor through Die's body, and he tilted his head back and groaned, issuing a soft, "Please, Tooru... please put my cock in your gorgeous, talented mouth."

That was all it took for Kyo to finally lean in and wrap his lips around Die's cock, his tongue swirling around the head. He moaned at the first taste of his lover, lowering his head, taking more of him into his mouth. He gazed up at the other, his hands sliding up his thighs and over his hips, squeezing lightly as he began slowly bobbing his head.

Die finally looked back down, watching as Kyo moved over his cock. Somehow, despite having had Kyo do this dozens of times since they'd been together, this one was different. This one felt like heaven was descending on him each time Kyo moved, and the look on his face clearly displayed that.

Kyo's eyes caught Die's, and his heart squeezed almost painfully in his chest at the sheer emotion and desire between them. He moaned again, pulling back to lick at the head, digging his tongue into the slit before engulfing him once again.

Die gave it a few more moments of Kyo sucking on him before he breathed out, "No more or I'll cum."

Kyo almost didn't stop, and it was with great effort that he pulled back, licking his lips as he did. "What if that's what I wanted?"

Die tilted his head back and let out a feeble laugh. "If you're planning on giving it to me, then by all means... finish me. I'll be hard again the moment your cock thrusts into me anyway."

Kyo debated for a moment, torn by what he wanted most. He leaned in and licked over the tip of Die's dick then, smirked slightly as he shifted and took Die completely down his throat with a groan.

Die let out a string of curses as Kyo engulfed his cock again, one hand lightly smacking the wall behind him. He did his best not to surge forward, desperate for the sensation, loving what was happening to him right then.

Kyo would have grinned if he didn't have a mouthful of cock. He loved his lover's reactions to things like this. With a moan, he reached up and grabbed Die's hips, holding onto them as he started deep-throating him, the head of Die's cock hitting the back of his throat.

Having Kyo go after him so vigorously was all Die needed. Clasping one hand over his mouth, he cried out, his body trembling for a moment before he started to lose it, his cock pulsing in Kyo's mouth.

Kyo groaned as soon as Die started cumming, but he didn't slow down in the least. Rather, he kept bobbing his head, only pausing to swallow every few seconds.

Die's arousal skyrocketed in the face of what Kyo was doing, his hips surging forward of their own accord to meet Kyo's movements. His heart beat sped up, his breathing rapid as he moved to grapple at the wall instead of at Kyo, all of it nearly too much for him to withstand.

Kyo reached between his own legs, groping himself as he carried on sucking Die, an intense look in his eyes. He finally shifted his other hand between Die's legs, fondling his sac then stroking a finger over his entrance.

There were a few seconds where Die thought for sure he would pass out with the other still going after him. But after a moment, he finally whined out, "P-please, too much!"

The vocalist very nearly didn't stop, wanting to bring Die to that next level of pleasure. He finally relented though, pulling back, a bead of cum leaking from the corner of his mouth.

Panting, Die slid down the wall, reaching out to grab Kyo and haul him closer. "C'mere, you amazing little prick."

Kyo blinked at the name, huffing out a laugh as he crawled forward, pressing a kiss to Die's lips.

Die shifted them, breathing out against Kyo's lips, "Tell me... tell me what you want."

Kyo grunted lowly then reached to grab Die's hand, bringing it to press against his aching arousal. "I want you to crawl in my lap and bury my cock in your delicious body."

"Granted... granted a million times over," Die returned, eagerly moving them around so that he could stand up and get rid of his shoes and pants entirely. He dug out his wallet and fished out a super lubricated condom, ripping it open and shifting to kneel in front of Kyo. "Pants, open," he breathed out.

Kyo licked his lips, shivering as he still tasted his lover there. "Mmm, I do love it when you're prepared." He undid his pants, pushing them down just enough to free his cock. He spat into his hand and stroked it over his length, bucking his hips up slightly at the touch. "C'mere and ride me, baby."

Die leaned in and rolled the condom down over Kyo's cock. With that done, he moved to straddle Kyo's lap, glad that he'd at least grown used to taking his lover. Prep was a nicety these days, not a necessity, and while it'd be a bit uncomfortable for a few seconds, he'd get used to it. Sliding down over the other's cock, he settled himself in Kyo's lap and wrapped his arms around him, pressing his lips against Kyo's neck.

A moan left him as Die slid the condom over him, his cock twitching in anticipation. "Die," he breathed out, reaching for his lover. He grasped the other's hips as he slid down on him, a shudder going through him. "Oh gods...you feel like heaven..." He brought one hand up to push into Die's hair, the other massaging his hip.

Die shuddered as he lowered himself onto his lover's length, taking deep, calming breaths as he did so. Once he was fully seated, he breathed out, "Just... hold on a second... let me get used to you." Granted, he'd been with Kyo time and again, but no prep and very little lube equaled a necessity to stay still for a bit in Die's case.

Kyo's muscles tensed as Die fully seated himself then requested him to stay still. It was a difficult thing to do with every fiber of his being screaming at him to thrust up into that delicious heat surrounding him. Instead, he slid his hands up, caressing Die's chest, toying lightly with his nipples.

It took Die a bit, but finally, he moved just a little, testing the waters. When it felt good, not horrible, he breathed out a soft pleased sound and moved himself up so that Kyo was barely inside him and then whispered out, "Fuck me, darling... fuck me with all that desperation I know you've got tangled up in there."

Die's movements sent shockwaves of pleasure through him, causing Kyo to gasp softly. As soon as those words left his lover's lips, Kyo was raising his knees and pushing up as hard and fast as he could, unable to stop the moans spilling out. "Die!"

Gasping, Die clung to the other as he thrust up into him again and again. It felt almost mind-blowingly good, and he couldn't stop himself from starting to voice it as well, not caring if there was still staff in the building or perhaps a member of Kyo's band lurking in the hallways.

The vocalist was beyond caring about how loud he was being, his mind totally focused on thrusting his cock into Die's body. He shifted his hands back to the other's hips, holding them tight enough to bruise as he pushed deeper into him.

Die found he loved the tightness of the fingers on his hips, his head falling back as he moaned and leaned himself back from Kyo a little bit. Eagerly, he stared down between them, watching his own dick slap against Kyo's abdomen with every movement, still hard from earlier. Somehow... he felt almost proud.

Kyo grunted as Die shifted, changing the angle for him. He kept his grip on the other, continuing to thrust up in him even as his thigh muscles began to quiver slightly.

Finally, Die started to move as well, joining Kyo in each thrust, the sound of their bodies joining lewd and rather loud as well. Reaching for the wall to support him somewhat, Die arched and groaned again.

Kyo dropped his head back as Die started moving with him, the sound bouncing off the walls proving to be rather erotic. He moved one hand between them to wrap around Die's cock, stroking him at a slightly erratic pace.

Die moved again, this time to spread his legs more, giving Kyo more of a shallow ground for thrusting, clinging to both Kyo and the wall as they moved, his cries honestly some of the loudest they'd been in a long while, the combination of having waited so long in between and doing this in such a public place leaving him unable to stop himself from calling out in such a way.

Kyo moaned, his cock throbbing just from the way Die was vocalizing his pleasure. He kept up the current pace for a few more minutes before stilling. Moving his hand from Die's cock to his back, he twisted just so and flipped Die over onto his back on the floor. Gazing down at the other, he smirked and pushed back into his body, one hand hitching Die's thigh up to get the right angle.

It took a few tries, but finally Kyo had Die singing like a fucking porn star as he hit all the right places at once. Die shoved one hand into his own hair, pulling as he writhed under Kyo, so close he could almost taste it.

Kyo watched Die's face as the other's voice bounced off the walls. A low moan left him as he hunched over the guitarist, slamming into him with quick, hard thrusts, his orgasm desperately close. "Die...f-fuck!"

When Die came, it was like a rubber band snapping inside him. One moment, it was stretching, pulling at him, the need to cum eating him alive... and then he was cumming, nearly screaming as he bucked under Kyo, utterly ruining his own shirt in the process.

The instant Die began cumming, Kyo shifted and sped up, thrusting into his lover's clenching body. It wasn't another moment before it all became too much for him, and with a single cry, his lost it, body trembling as he found his release. He came for what felt like forever before finally stilling and slumping over Die, panting hard.

Die lay there in a daze, just staring up at Kyo with unfocused eyes. He gave it a few more moments and then, finally, breathed out, "I... was really loud."

Kyo gazed down at Die, huffed out a laugh. "Mmm, yes you were, and it was gorgeous..." He leaned down to kiss Die's lips, shuddering slightly as he moved within him.

With a small grunt, Die spoke up again. "Do you think... someone heard us? Me?"

The vocalist hummed, easing out of his lover to flop beside him for a moment. "Mmn...maybe not. This is a studio, after all."

"True," Die returned, laughing softly afterward. "Too bad, really... there was a part of me seriously getting off on the idea that someone could be listening in on that very amazing session we just had."

Kyo leaned over and pressed his face against side, his hand going to rub the other's stomach. "Well, maybe someone did hear you then..." He lifted his head to gaze at his lover, smirking. "Next time, I'll leave the door open..."

Die almost choked on that last bit, shivering slightly and then murmuring, "Well, I suppose this one is _your_ band... hard to have it without you, right?" Meaning, of course, that he had more freedom than they might in regards to Dir en grey.

The vocalist grinned widely. "Indeed...no pushy management about or anything."

Grabbing Kyo, Die rolled over onto his back again, tugging Kyo to straddle him. "Maybe... just maybe... I could be persuaded into a slightly gentler round three?" he queried softly, a little smirk on his lips.

Kyo huffed softly as he was pulled on top of Die. He leaned down and kissed Die's lips, nibbling the bottom one. "Mm, is that so?" he murmured, rocking his hips the slightest bit.

Die hissed a little at the nibbling, chuckling just after and then breathing out, "Yes... just maybe."

Kyo grinned, holding up his finger as he shifted off of Die. He stood up and made his way to the door, peeking out then cracking it ever so slightly. He then returned to Die, a smirk on his lips as he shucked off the rest of his clothes. "There now, you can be as loud as you want, and I'm sure the cleaning staff will hear you..."

Kyo's actions had Die gaping up at him in all honesty. He hadn't actually thought Kyo was serious, but apparently he was. And it was that fact alone that brought arousal swirling through his system once again.

He didn't bother with his shirt, leaving it on since he'd already soiled it once. Reaching out, he motioned for Kyo to come over him. "Use my cum, baby..."

Kyo licked his lips and settled between Die's knees, running his hand over his lover's length before moving to gather up some of his cum. He rubbed it between his fingers then wrapped his hand around Die, stroking him slowly, getting him hard once again.

Die arched up toward the other as he started to jack him off, breathing out, "You were serious... I... I won't get you in trouble?"

Kyo continued to work Die's cock, his other hand moving to cup his sac, squeezing lightly. "Nope....the building's nearly empty now. Besides, if anyone does hear you, they'll be too busy jacking off to run and report it."

Breathing out a laugh, Die tugged Kyo closer to him, pressing his lips against the other's, kissing him passionately.

Kyo shifted his hand to brace himself as he kissed Die back deeply, his other hand still stroking his cock. He took his time with the kiss, pushing his tongue into the other's mouth, tasting him.

It didn't take Die long to get hard again, his hips gently pushing up into Kyo's hand as the other stroked him. He wasn't entirely sure he could cum again, but he definitely wanted to experience this, even if he couldn't.

As soon as Kyo felt Die come to full hardness again, he shifted back and released him. Getting on his knees, he brought his hand to his mouth, sliding two fingers in in a rather lewd manner, noisily sucking on them before removing them. With a smirk to his lover, he dropped his hand between his legs and prodded his own entrance, shivering as he pushed a single digit into himself.

"Holy fucking hell," Die breathed out, watching as Kyo began prepping himself, the sight of it beyond erotic. Some part of Die almost hoped there were security cameras, though the other part was certain if there were, they were both screwed to hell and back... and not in the good sort of way. But, for now, he just focused on how erotic it would be to find that video later.

Kyo groaned as he pushed his finger into himself a couple of times before adding the second, his head dropping back. He spread his knees a bit, leaning forward to place one hand on Die's leg for support as he started fingering himself, ignoring the slight sting. "Hnn...feels good...but not as good as your cock," he moaned out, working himself up.

"You make me so fucking hard when you do that," Die breathed out. "I could just watch you all night...."

The vocalist bit his lip, going after himself harder for a moment before stopping, his cock twitching between his legs. "You could...but then you would miss out burying your cock in my tight ass..."

"That... is very _very_ true," Die returned, gesturing Kyo closer. "C'mon, you can take me... I know you can."

Kyo grunted and pulled his fingers free, reaching out to wipe them on his discarded pants. Moving over to Die, he straddled him, reaching back to grasp his cock to steady it before slowly sinking down onto it. Once he was fully seated, he let out a moan, his hands going to splay across Die's chest. "Indeed, I can..."

Die had to stifle his moan as the other sank down on him, his hips pushing up toward Kyo. "Holy fucking shit, I don't think you'd been this tight in a while," he let out.

The vocalist gazed down at his lover, rocking his hips a little. "It's been a while...," he murmured, clenching around Die for a moment. He stayed that way for a bit longer then leaned down, starting to gradually move his hips, Die's length shifting within him. "Gods...too long..."

Die chuckled as the other breathed out those last words, slowly rocking up into Kyo's body, focusing on his lover's face as he moved. "Tell me everything... I want to know exactly how it feels."

Kyo's face was one of sheer pleasure as Die moved within him, grazing every delicious nerve ending in his body. "Amazing...so full...so...gods...I could never get enough of feeling you inside me, Daisuke..."

The words set off fireworks inside Die's mind, shoving his body very much into the same sort of feeling. With a groan, he grabbed Kyo's hips and began to take control of their movements.

The vocalist cried out when Die took control, heat spiraling within him, setting off sparks. He fisted his hands in Die's shirt, pushing his hips back to meet his lover's thrusts.

"You're gorgeous in every single way... you know that?" Thrusting up into the other, Die's breathing grew more and more sporadic.

Kyo smiled softly at Die, leaning down enough to kiss him briefly before breaking away to breathe again. "As are you, my Koi..." He shivered as he moved with Die, his cock pushing against the other's abdomen, sending pleasure shooting through him.

"Lean over me and just grind on me for a while." Die gestured the other down toward him, turning his head to glance toward the door and the sliver of light from the hallway.

Kyo complied with Die's request, positioning himself just so and grinding his hips down. He moaned as the new position brought more sensation to his cock. "Die..."

"See?" Die breathed out, "Absolute genius..." with that, he began bucking his hips up toward Kyo, moving them against one another even quicker than before.

Kyo groaned, burying his head against Die's neck, nipping the skin there just a little too hard as Die moved. It was all becoming far too much for him too quickly. "Harder," he moaned out against Die's skin, clenching around him.

Die let out a little growl. "Stop biting, and I will." Laughing softly, he spread his legs a bit more and held Kyo's hips down, thrusting against him.

Kyo grunted, nipping once more in retaliation before shifting himself up a bit, gazing down at Die as the other pushed into him at a harder pace. "Fuck!" he cried out, uncaring of how loud he was right then.

"My name... say my fucking name, Kyo," Die gritted out, his movements growing harsher and harder as they moved.

Kyo shuddered at the request, shifting up fully then practically bouncing on Die's cock. He threw his head back and sang out Die's name, his voice echoing off the walls as he did. "Daisuke!"

"Oh Jesus Christ, I think I found my new favorite thing," Die intoned as he thrust up into the other's body time and again.

Once Kyo started, he couldn't stop, his body slamming down hard onto Die as he let out intonation after intonation of Die's name, the pitch getting louder the closer he got to coming.

Die let out his own moans to match those that Kyo was giving, biting his lower lip to not let them overwhelm any of Kyo's own. "Cum for me," he let out finally, "Come on, baby... let it all out for me."

Kyo held out for just a short while longer before the coil within him snapped and he was crying the loudest he had all night, cumming hard all over Die's stomach and chest. His body nearly convulsed with the effort of it, his inner walls tightening around Die's length as his pleasure coursed through him.

Nothing in the world could have stopped Die at that point, every ounce of his being pushing him toward his orgasm. With a cry of his own, he found his orgasm once again; though he wasn't entirely sure anything would actually come of it.

Kyo could feel the way Die's body moved under him as he came, though it was only a spurt or two that he felt within his body. It didn't matter, though; he knew there was still pleasure in it anyway.

Die eased himself back down onto the floor and breathed out a pleased little laugh. "You're amazing, darling... absolutely amazing."

Kyo slumped back against Die's knees for the moment, panting heavily. "So...are...you," he breathed out, a grin spreading across his face.

Die stared up at his lover for a few moments before he finally stretched up an arm and pushed the door shut for a bit of privacy in these moments, the ones he almost felt were more intimate than the actual sex acts themselves. These were the moments he waited for, the ones he craved and adored beyond all else. And as he lay there, staring up into Kyo's face, he realized that nothing in the world was better than having Kyo in his life.


	75. Chapter 75

It had been a while since Die and Kyo had gone on an actual date. They'd been busy between various projects, their little amounts of time off mostly spent sleeping or attending whatever event they were required to.

And it wasn't just their dating that was suffering. Somehow, even with promises of being more active sexually rather than waiting eons in between, they still never quite managed it anymore. For Die's part, at least, it wasn't a lack of drive. No, that part was still thriving and driving him somewhat mad in all honesty. But time was a precious thing, and there was far too little of it.

However, tonight, they'd at least found time for the romance portion of their relationship, which was something Die had been feeling they were neglecting more than anything. Above and beyond the physical, he wanted the emotional before they forgot to deal with it entirely.

As such, they'd gone to a random new restaurant, not their usual discrete place, but it seemed that no one noticed who they were, at least. They'd been settled at a table along the back wall, though about midway through the restaurant, and Die had ordered them a lovely bottle of red wine. When Die had taken care of the ordering, getting a huge sampler of various sushi rolls for the pair of them, he'd thought he'd seen a glimmer of surprise filter over Kyo's face.

Die wasn't the only one feeling as though their relationship was being neglected. Kyo had started to notice that they were, more often than not, spending most of their time together asleep. It was taking its toll, and the vocalist had been more than happy to agree to the date that he and Die were currently on.

His lover had ordered some very nice wine, and Kyo did not hesitate to indulge in it, finding it to be very smooth and slightly sweet. He'd also let Die take care of ordering their food, unable to hide his surprise when the other ordered some of his favorite sushi. He raised an eyebrow and leaned on the table, a small smile tugging at his lips. "You? Ordering sushi? I'm shocked..."

Die just gave him a cheeky smile and then shrugged his shoulders lightly, sipping at his first glass of wine, already most of the way through it, though that wasn't in any way unusual. Even with his cutbacks in the alcohol department, he still drank through the first drink of any evening very quickly.

"Yeah, well... there's some I can stand in there. And besides, I took _you_ out," he murmured quietly. "So I'm pampering you."

Kyo's face lit up in a bright smile, and he reached out to briefly squeeze Die's hand. "Thank you, love." He sat back and sipped at his wine, going through his own glass relatively quickly as well. "I hope this pampering includes that chocolate and raspberry cheesecake I spotted on the dessert menu."

Die laughed. "It includes whatever your little heart desires from that menu. Budget is the sky... we have savings again now, so we're fine." Die smiled at him, watching his lover fondly as he finished the glass and poured himself a second.

Kyo chuckled at the mention of savings. He knew they could both afford to never work another day in their lives at this point, but they still treated money as something they had to be careful with. Drawing himself from his musing, he smiled at Die again, reaching out to grab a piece of the fried tofu they had for an appetizer.

Die placed his elbow on the table and cradled his chin in his hand, just gazing at the other. Maybe it was open, maybe he shouldn't have been displaying his affection so much, but at this point, he just didn't care.

Kyo looked up from his food and noticed Die pretty much gazing at him. He swallowed his bite and washed it down with the rest of his wine, head tilting slightly. "What are you looking at that's so fascinating?"

"You, of course," Die returned, chuckling faintly and then shrugging.

Kyo blushed and looked away, waving his hand. "Shush, and pour me some more wine...," he muttered before smiling the slightest bit.

Die picked up the bottle and poured him some more wine, scooting forward a bit more. The tablecloth was about to drive him nuts. The length of it was far too long for his tastes, and having to constantly move it about annoying him. He adjusted it again.

Kyo watched Die futz with the tablecloth for a moment before picking up his glass and taking a sip. He licked his lips then gestured at his lover. "Do you want me to pull it more to this side?"

The redhead huffed out a small laugh. "No, it's fine. Just always wonder why they keep them so long, that's all."

Kyo shrugged, leaning his elbow on the table and sipping his wine, ingesting more than he probably should be but not caring. "This place is nice, though. Very modern and clean."

"It seemed to have some good mentions among a few friends, so I figured I'd try it out." Die took another good drink of his wine, already starting to feel the effects given he wasn't eating the appetizer and his first meal of the day had been ages ago. But he didn't show it, too many years of experience under his belt to let him.

Kyo smiled, settling his glass on the table. "Give them my thanks for the recommendation. So far, I'm impressed. Of course, that may just be my company for the evening."

"How could you ever complain about the company? I mean... I'm a shining star, and all places light up with me in them, right?" Die followed the self-compliments with a roll of his eyes and a shake of his head, the arrogant words having no traction with the look and the way he said them.

The shorter couldn't help but laugh at his lover's sarcasm, his foot reaching out under the table to lightly kick him. "Of course they do...your smile is contagious."

"So I have been told," Die returned, taking another large sip of wine before putting his glass down, mostly empty once again. Granted, they had the whole bottle to go through, but that didn't mean he had to drink it all.

Kyo chuckled again, shaking his head. "It's true. Sometimes all I have to do is see you smile, and my bad mood is chased away."

"You, sir, deserve an award for amazing; I'm just saying." Die quieted down the moment that the waiter came by, delivering a huge boat of sushi, placing it on the table and thanking them quietly.

Kyo opened his mouth to deny such a claim but shut it when the waiter came. He thanked him then looked over the magnificent display of all manner of rolls and pieces of fish. It was breathtaking. "This is gorgeous," he uttered softly, pulling his camera from his bag to snap a picture. "I don't know what to try first."

Die pointed at one near him. "Take more than one piece of this one, and I stab you with my chopsticks. Full on bloody warfare, man." Smirking, he picked up the utensils in question and plucked up a single piece to eat.

Kyo snorted and pulled out his chopsticks, selecting a delicate piece of sashimi and placing it in his mouth. He groaned nearly erotically as he chewed the tender fish, a look of bliss crossing his features. He was quick to pick up another, dipping this one very lightly in the provided soy sauce before eating it. "Amazing," he murmured in between bites, already going for his next one.

Die watched his lover consume the sushi, something about the way he was going about it turning him on. Of course... it _had_ been a while, and he was sure that had a lot to do with his reactions. But it was strange just how much it was affecting him. He shifted closer to the table, picking up another piece of his roll, placing it in his mouth and just smiling to himself, waiting on Kyo's next reaction.

After the vocalist had finished his fourth piece of sashimi, he paused and took another sip of wine. Licking his lips slowly, he reached out to steal a piece of the roll Die had claimed as his own. With a smirk, he looked right into his lover's eyes as he plucked it up and popped it into his mouth, another groan of satisfaction escaping him as he chewed.

Surprisingly Die's reaction was not to chide Kyo about the roll or even try to stab him with his chopsticks. Instead, he just watched him, waiting, and then listening to that delightful sound the other made. A small puff of breath escaped him as he picked up another piece to distract from his other hand moving up his thigh, bringing the tablecloth with it to cover his growing erection. It was wrong... perverse to the nth degree, but really, with Die, that was nothing new.

For the moment, Kyo was unaware of Die's growing need, his focus fully on the delectable flavors of their meal. He chose his next bite and ate it with the same enthusiasm as the first. When that one was consumed, he selected a piece of eel sashimi, smirking at Die. "Mm, and now for a little aphrodisiac," he quipped as he popped it into his mouth.

Die almost choked on a drink of wine at that comment, though he just smirked and continued with eating his own roll. "It's never really worked for me... or when I tried it on people in my youth, but hey, try away." Though, the way Kyo was eating things was certainly working on Die anyway. His hand slid up over the bulge in his pants, for now just lightly touching the head of his dick, though not moving his arm or anything that would be obvious. It just looked like his hand was on his thigh for all purposes. He downed more of his wine and then put the glass down. "Your turn, fill me up." He plucked up a piece of another roll and sniffed it before trying it.

Kyo laughed softly, shaking his head. "It hasn't for me either, but the sentiment is there all the same." He reached for the bottle of wine, pouring his lover a glassful then refilling his own. After that, he went for the slightly less healthy tempura crab roll, finding it to be just as tasty as the others. "This stuff is orgasmically delicious..."

"It's better than a lot," Die offered in return, picking up his wine glass and taking another healthy amount from it before placing it back down and going about trying a piece of that one as well.

Kyo's eyes flicked to Die's wine, noting how much he was drinking then pushing the thought from his head. Neither of them had indulged in a long time, so what did it matter if his lover got a bit tipsy? 

He carried on eating, finally deciding to stop before he was too full for the dessert he'd already picked out. "I think this will have be breakfast and maybe lunch for tomorrow."

Die let out a small laugh, obviously growing more and more tipsy now, the fact that it was showing proving how far along in the drunk-game he was. Along with the laugh, he grew more daring, his fingers actually grasping his cock through the fabric of his pants and lightly teasing it, his arousal growing.

Kyo laughed with Die, feeling a bit on the tipsy side himself. He signaled the waiter and once he was at their table, he ordered his dessert the sat back, looking at the redhead. "Your cheeks are pink."

The longer that Die teased himself, the more and more aroused he became. The daring and quite drunk part of him wanted to go for it and just whip it out and go for it entirely, see if anyone would notice. The other part told him he was a celebrity and surely that would be noticed. 

When Kyo mentioned his cheeks, he let out a laugh and pointed at the wine. "I may be a bit drunk." He picked up the glass regardless and began to drink from it again, his hand moving over his cock in his pants in a way he hoped wouldn't get him caught just yet, though he was definitely quickly approaching that point where he'd lose it no matter what.

Kyo laughed softly at Die statement, nodding. "I noticed, but that's okay, we took a taxi here for a reason." He was going to say more but his dessert arrived, causing his train of thought to go in another direction. A pleased look settled on his face as he picked up the provided fork, digging into the cheesecake. Another nearly erotic moan left his lips as he ate, his tongue soon sliding out to lick a stray bit of whipped cream from his lips. 

"That is…amazing," he commented, plucking up a strawberry and reaching over to hold it near Die's lips, ignoring the fact that they were in public. He'd already decided no one was paying them any mind.

Die neatly took the fruit from him, chewing it and allowing himself a groan that had absolutely nothing to do with the berry he'd just consumed and everything to do with his hand under the table. He was so close, his conversational ability on hold while he continued to massage his dick in an attempt to get himself off while right there, in the midst of the restaurant.

Kyo raised an eyebrow at Die's groan, not really expecting it with a simple strawberry. He sat back and took in his lover's expression, noting the half-lidded eyes and parted lips, the slightly quickened breath and, finally, the fact that his hand hadn't been on the table in quite some time. He blinked slightly then leaned forward as much as he could, his voice low as he spoke. "Daisuke, are you doing what I think you're doing under the table?"

Die was right there, right on the cusp of it and thrilled by the prospect of cumming in his pants for the first time in years. But then Kyo's voice cut through his thoughts, finding him out in a mere second. What had he done? How had he given himself away? His hand moved off his dick, and he gave Kyo an alarmed look, though his cheeks flushed badly. There was no hiding a thing with the look of shame that crossed his features.

Satisfied that he'd been right, Kyo let the idea of what Die was doing sink in, finding his own arousal with it. He chewed his bottom lip for a few moments, eyes on Die. He felt a bit sorry he'd caused his lover to feel ashamed and shook his head. "Don't stop on my account, darling....I just wanted to be let in on the little secret." He smiled then, heat dancing in his eyes.

Shivering faintly, Die allowed his hand to slide back to where it had been, picking up his wine glass and draining the rest of the contents in what he could only call an attempt at liquid courage. Putting the glass back down, he leaned forward on his other hand, letting his hair fall over his cheek to hide him a bit from the rest of the patrons. "Tell me if someone's coming then," he breathed out, his fingertips once more working over himself in his pants.

Kyo bit back a groan as he saw Die's arm move slightly, now knowing what he was doing. He shifted a bit and sipped his own wine, his pants tenting the slightest. "Of course," he murmured, attempting to finish off his dessert, though his mind was decidedly elsewhere.

It didn't take Die long now that he had a lookout, and he was definitely more aroused than he had been when he'd started. For a moment, he tensed, and then sort of melted in his chair as he began to shoot into his trousers. His hand slid over his mouth in a way that made it look like he was wiping at it from the meal, though to Kyo it probably looked like what it really was, an attempt to cover up his pleasured look as he came.

Kyo watched Die with a deep intensity, a shiver rippling through him as the other came. His hand gripped his fork tightly for a moment before he settled, a huff of breathing leaving him. "Jesus, Die..."

It took Die a bit to collect himself and to manage to discretely use his napkin to dab at the mess he'd just made so it wouldn't show as white as it leaked through his pants. Once he finally got himself back together, he chuckled and shook his head a little. "I think... I'm drunk."

"You think," Kyo snorted, polishing off the last berry on his plate. He wiped his mouth then settled back, flicking his eyes down at the tent in his pants. "I can't even leave the table yet..."

"Too bad someone didn't wear black pants today," Die returned, smirking at Kyo before finally returning both hands to the table top, signaling the waiter.

Kyo glared at Die for a moment then huffed. "If I'd known...," he muttered out, quieting himself when the waiter came over with their to-go boxes and check.

Die watched the waiter box their food and then put his credit card down for the check, a small, knowing look on his face.

Kyo smiled pleasantly at the waiter, offering a soft "thank you" as he took Die's card off to process their payment. Once he was out of earshot, his smile turned into a heated look that he turned on his lover. "When we get home....I'm going to bend your ass over the couch and....," he cut off, the waiter returning with Die's card and the receipt.

Die cleared his throat as the waiter returned, signing the receipt and accepting the bag with chopsticks and condiments. He offered a thank you and waited on the guy to depart, pouring the rest of the wine into his glass and quickly downing it. Once the cup was back on the table, he offered, "And?"

Kyo glanced around then licked his lips, smirking slightly. "Fuck you so hard, you won't be able to stand tomorrow."

"That'll take a lot; sure you got it in you?" Die grinned at him, checking his pants and then stuffing the napkin in the bag, not rude enough to leave a cum-stained napkin at the restaurant. The loss of one napkin was better than them touching such a thing. Standing up, he held out the bag to Kyo, willing to own his own indiscretions to cover Kyo's current state.

Kyo let out a low laugh, taking the bag and carrying it in front of himself to hide his arousal. He suddenly regretted having drunk so much wine, the effects making themselves well known in the way his head spun a bit as well as the sudden need to take a piss. He smirked to himself as he followed Die out onto the street, keeping that last bit to himself for now.

Die made his way through the restaurant, feeling maybe a bit cocky at the fact that he'd just jacked off under the table and no one but Kyo knew. He met a few eyes and gave a few sly grins as he moved; a one-man show that had been absent perhaps too long. 

By the time he got outside, he had his head held high and his pulse was slightly elevated from the high of what he'd done. Stepping out to the curb, he started the game of flagging a cab, the first one pulling over for him, something highly unusual. He smoothly pulled open the door and slid all the way to the other side, breathing out their address and sliding his card for the fare.

Kyo observed Die as they made their way out, a spike of lust going through him at his lover's cockiness. He loved it, something about the way Die shone with confidence. It gave him his own boost, a grin on his lips as he slid into the cab next to Die. 

Once they were on their way, he let his hand rest on the other's thigh, fingers lightly dancing there as he squirmed vaguely in his seat.

Die moved the other's hand to the spot he'd stained with his cum, still damp. He sat there, a smirk on his lips, one arm draped over the back of the seat as the cabbie took off, some very club-scene music playing from the front, making Die even more self-confident than he already had been.

Kyo let out a low grunt as he felt the damp spot, his fingers pressing against the material as his hips pushed up faintly. A shiver rippled down his spine as his cock pressed against the front of his pants, the combined need to piss and his arousal making him quite sensitive. 

Of course, Die's change in attitude wasn't helping, and he was starting to consider having the other fuck him instead of the other way around.

Die didn't miss the way Kyo was moving, his gaze flicking over the other's body before he gazed toward the front of the cab again, that look still glued on his face. There was nothing that was gonna bring him down right then.

It wasn't long before the ride starting turning in a form of torture for Kyo. They hit a bump, and he barely bit back the groan that wanted out as the pressure on his bladder intensified. He squeezed his eyes shut and breathed in a deep breath before squirming again, his hand clenching the material of Die's pants.

Slowly Die started to realize something more was going on with Kyo than just his arousal. He watched the way the other reacted, the manner in which he gripped Die's pants and the gasps as they hit each bump and rut in the road. A new look crossed his face, this one very pleased and definitely aroused, though he said nothing.

By the time they were within 15 minutes of being close to their house, Kyo was in agony. He'd temporarily forgotten his arousal in favor of focusing on not pissing his pants instead. Finally, he reached out and grabbed Die's hand, placing it over his faintly distended lower abdomen, flicking his eyes to face. "Desperate," he murmured out.

That easy grin returned to Die's features as Kyo placed his hand over the bulge of his bladder. He leaned in, uncaring of the cabbie right then, and slid his tongue over the shell of Kyo's ear, breathing out, "I know... keep holding it, darling."

Kyo shuddered as Die's tongue slid over his ear, his hand tightening over the other's. He leaned his head back and focused on breathing. Things were fine until their house was in sight. It was then that the cab hit a large bump in the road, causing him to bounce just right. A spurt of piss leaked out onto his pants, causing his cheeks to flush. "Damn it," he breathed out, glancing down at the dark spot. He managed to not let anymore out but it was bordering on extremely painful at this point.

The guitarist kept his eyes on the other, watching the entire time. When he lost it, Die was staring right at his crotch, and it turned him on so immediately and so hard, he knew right then he wasn't going to let Kyo get to the bathroom no matter the cost. Smirking, he waited on the car to arrive, scooting back to his side and waiting until they came to a stop, opening the door. He quickly stepped out and made his way up the walk as fast as possible, intentionally getting in the way of the door.

Kyo was slower only because he was trying not to lose it completely as he got out. He offered a hurried "thanks" to the driver then went up the walk, stopping behind Die, groaning when he noticed the other was not opening the door. "Die…please..."

Die finally opened the door, neatly taking the bag from Kyo and making his way inside, doing his best to stay in the way of the other.

Kyo stepped inside, nearly tripping over himself as he fought to get his shoes off. He moved into the hallway and looked at Die, groaning softly as a spasm hit him, more leaking from his cock. "Oh Gods....Die...I can't...too much wine," he practically whined out, staring down at the now large wet spot on the front of his pants.

Die grabbed Kyo's wrist the instant the other even remotely attempted to get past where he was. Spinning him around, he shoved him back into the wall, careful to make sure it wasn't anywhere that would actually hurt Kyo, just surprise him. Even drunk Die was no fool.

Kyo gasped as he was spun around and shoved into the wall, the shock of it making him finally lose complete control. He let out a desperate sound as he pissed right there in his pants, unable to remotely stop it.

Die was quick to react, reaching down and unzipping Kyo's pants, pulling his cock free and letting him piss all over the floor in the entryway, chuckling as he leaned down to kiss at Kyo's neck. "Mmm... a genuine accident... glorious." He slid his tongue up the other's neck, just listening to the sound of Kyo pissing full-force on the floor.

Kyo breathed a sigh of relief as Die got him out of his pants. He leaned his head to the side, pushing his fingers in Die's hair as he pissed, his bladder seemingly bottomless. "Hnng...."

The more Kyo went, the harder Die got. He breathed out a quiet murmur of awe against his neck, "You're gonna flood the entire hallway. So dirty, darling."

Kyo grunted in response, reaching down to grasp his cock, stroking it as he went, shamelessly enjoying the sensation. When his stream finally slowed down to dripping, he let go and turned to look at Die, pants of breath leaving him. "I wasn't kidding when I said I was desperate..."

"Mmm... this I am noticing," Die murmured, unzipping his own fly and freeing his dick. Without really any warning, he started to go as well, just watching Kyo, a self-satisfied smirk on his face. "Look what you encouraged me to do," he muttered out faintly.

Kyo glanced down at Die's dick, smirking when his lover started pissing as well. He moved his hand down to wrap around his lover's cock, brushing his thumb over the tip. "Mmm, now who's being dirty," he breathed out.

"I'm always dirty, love." Die moved to flick his tongue over Kyo's ear again. "Nothing like a good excuse to relieve myself somewhere I shouldn't."

Kyo let out a soft moan as Die's tongue found his ear again. "It's a good thing we went with tile here." He pressed his thumb against the head of Die's cock again, ignoring the fact that he was getting piss all over his hand.

"But pissing on the carpet is so much more fun," Die returned, "It's more satisfying to hear it and see it soaking into the carpet..." his hand moved to start jacking the other off rather frantically. "Your husband-to-be has been a very, very naughty boy."

Kyo hummed at Die's admission about pissing on the carpet. He was going to say something but his words pushed out in a moan when the other started jacking him off, setting his arousal aflame once more. "Ah...oh...is that so? Has my fiancé been a bad boy?"

"Very," Die breathed out, finally sliding to his knees, right in the middle of the puddle of piss and starting to suck the other off.

"Oh fuck, Die," Kyo moaned out, his hand spearing in the other's red hair, tugging. "That's it, naughty boy, suck my fucking cock."

Die groaned around the other's dick, bobbing his head enthusiastically.

Kyo stared down at Die, taking in how utterly debauched his lover looked, kneeling there in piss, his mouth full of cock. He bit his lip and pushed just a little on the back of Die's head, testing the other's reaction.

The reaction he received was favorable, Die just grunting and allowing himself to be pushed down, his eyes flicking up to meet the other's gaze.

Kyo met Die's gaze, fire burning in his eyes as he pushed down harder until his cock was down Die's throat. "Fuck yes," he moaned out, pulling Die's head back then shoving him down once more before effectively starting to fuck his mouth, his cock throbbing as he got close to losing it.

Die just let it happen, gagging a little the first time but accepting it readily each time after that. His eyes teared up, but he didn't care. His hand moved down to his own dick, stroking slowly as Kyo fucked his mouth, trying to breathe through his nose.

Kyo kept it up for another few minutes before letting out a deep moan as he started to cum, spilling his offering down Die's throat. At the end, he pushed Die back, letting the last dribble out onto the other's lips with a smirk. "You...are fucking amazing," he breathed out, his head hitting the wall as he dropped it back.

Being drunk made it that much easier for Die to take everything Kyo gave him. When the other started to cum, he did choke a little on the first spurt, but swallowed rather quickly and got himself completely back to normal when Kyo pulled out. Licking his lips, Die smirked up at the other. "Get some towels... our mess is getting cold and unpleasant... unless... you have more where that came from."

Kyo stood there for a moment then smirk, pushing a bit and letting out one last little spurt of piss and another tiny trickle. He sighed and patted Die's hair before carefully stepping away from him and going to get already dirty towels from their laundry, shucking off his wet pants while he was in there. He came back and spread them around, keeping one for Die.

Die chuckled, letting Kyo pee on him, though it wasn't really his thing. It was more comfortable than the cold piss was for the time being. While Kyo was gone, he emptied his pockets, tossing his stuff into the living room area where it'd stay dry, including his belt and belt buckle. That done, he set about getting up and removing his shoes, putting them aside, to be cleaned up later, glad the insides weren't drenched or anything. 

Once Kyo returned, he pulled off his shirt and stepped out of his pants, tugging off his socks, narrowly avoiding crashing into the wall.

Kyo reached out to catch Die, letting out a laugh. "Careful there...don't need you falling in it." He handed Die the dry towel, wrinkling his nose at the mess. "I'll mop it up later."

Die grunted a little, taking the towel and carefully drying himself off. With that done, he tossed it into the mess, letting it soak up a lot of it. "Easier to clean up while we're drunk... trust me." He'd done enough things on his own to know that you didn't care about cleaning it when drunk, but once you were sober, you wondered what the hell you'd been thinking.

Kyo pursed his lips, looking at the mess then grumbling. He stumbled past Die and back into the laundry to grab a basket. Bringing it out, he reached down and got the towels plus Die's clothes, putting them in the basket. "Okay, you start those while I get the rest up?" He wrinkled his nose again then headed for the kitchen to get their Swiffer spray mop.

"Your pants in there?" Die asked, picking up the basket and carefully making his way toward the washer.

Kyo nodded, pushing the button on the mop to make it spray cleaner over the area then starting to clean it up. "Yeah, left them behind, now I'm mopping with my dick out." He laughed at that, still pretty drunk and finding it amusing.

Chuckling, Die wandered off, just memorizing the image of Kyo mopping with his cock out. He stuffed the laundry in and added detergent and the softener ball. After a moment though, he remember Kyo's pants and pulled them off the floor. Pausing, he glanced back toward where Kyo was occupied and then smirked, holding them next to his dick and letting out the little bit more piss that had collected since he'd voided right into Kyo's jeans. He knew he'd not look at Kyo the same way ever again when he saw him wear these, that was for sure. Stuffing them in, he was satisfied with his secret, turning on the machine and spraying the basket down with Lysol just in case.

Kyo was oblivious to Die's little indiscretion as he finally finished up mopping. He'd tossed the dirty pad and gone over it again with a clean one before tossing that as well. He put the mop up and washed his hands before finally tugging his shirt off and heading into the laundry to leave it for the next load, completely nude. "Well, then...what an evening..."

Die glanced up when Kyo came to him, smirking and then grasping Kyo by the waist, tugging him closer. "Do you know what I've never done?" he questioned softly.

Kyo slipped his arms around Die, tilting his head up to look him. "Mm, what's that?"

"Fucked in a laundry room." Die grinned at him, looking quite pleased with himself.

Kyo's eyes lit up, a smirk playing on his lips. "Oh, is that so? I don't think I have either..."

"Then how about... you give me that fuck you were gonna?" Die breathed out, tugging Kyo close to him.

Kyo grunted softly, sliding his hands down to Die's hips, starting to grind against him. "Mmm, gladly...think you take it without lube?"

"I'm drunk, I'll be fine," Die returned, breathing out a little laugh.

Kyo grinned widely before releasing Die, stepping back some. He worked up a good amount of spit, spitting it into his palm then starting stroke his cock, working himself up again.

Die turned around and leaned on the dryer, spreading his legs and presenting himself to Kyo, waiting on the other to go ahead and take him.

It wasn't long before Kyo was fully hard again, his cock jutting out from his body as he stepped forward. He stuck his fingers in his mouth, wetting them then running them along Die's crack, teasing his entrance for a moment then lightly fingering him. Finding his lover nice and loose, he took only a minute with the prep then finally lined up his cock with Die's hole. With a groan, he pushed into him, sliding into his lover's body slowly. "Fuck, you always feel so fucking good Die."

Die gripped the dryer harshly as he was penetrated, breathing deeply and then relaxing himself as best he could. "Fuck me until I cum," he breathed out.

Kyo growled at Die's words, sliding his hand up the other's back and to his shoulder. He gripped it as he started to thrust into Die, his actions anything but gentle now.

Crying out, Die clung to the dryer, his head bowed and his body bouncing with the force of the thrusts that the other gave him.

Kyo hunched over Die, letting go of his shoulder in favor of holding onto the dryer. His hips snapped against Die, the sound loud even with the washer going.

"Fuck me harder!" Die cried out, his hand smacking the dryer.

The vocalist was quick to comply, thrusting harder into Die's body, panting with the effort. "Fuck!"

Die shifted just a bit, Kyo's dick finally finding his prostate. With a loud cry, he bucked back toward him. "There! Right there!"

Kyo groaned and shifted his feet, grabbing Die's hips as he rammed into him at just the right angle. He held on tight enough to bruise, moans spilling from his lips.

It didn't take long fucking him like that before Die started to cum, a strangled grunt of Kyo's name leaving him as he lost it all over the floor between their feet.

Kyo shuddered as Die started to cum, his pace faltering when the other's body clenched around him. He pushed into him a few more times and then stilled, his cock pulsing as he emptied into Die's body, moaning lowly.

Die pushed back toward him as he started to cum, whimpering a little. "Yes," he breathed out.

Kyo finally finished, slumping forward to rest his forehead against Die's back for a moment. "Gods...," he moaned out, shivering slightly.

"Mmm, you're so glorious," Die whispered quietly.

Kyo huffed out a laugh, pressing his lips to Die's skin. He took a moment to trail kisses along his lover's spine before easing out of him. Still, his hands didn't leave the other, stroking his hips softly as he admired the faint bruises there. "So are you, my darling husband-to-be..."

Die eased himself down onto the floor, grabbing the pile of blankets from the corner and gesturing the other down. "Come on.... be a freak with me, darling.... let's fall asleep in the washroom."

Kyo watched Die and let out a laugh, shifting down to his knees and tugging the other to him. "Mm, for a little bit...then shower...then the bed." He leaned in and nuzzled against Die's neck.

Chuckling, Die tugged the other down on top of him. He squirmed around and then snuggled in with him, closing his eyes.

Kyo smiled and cuddled in against Die, kissing his lips then settling. "I love you, baby."

"I love you, too," Die murmured softly, tugging some covers over them.

Kyo burrowed into their ridiculous little nest on the washroom floor, a smile painted on his lips as he closed his eyes.


	76. Chapter 76

It had been quite some time since Kyo and Die had gotten engaged and now the vocalist found himself pacing their bedroom nervously as he considered the conversation he was about to initiate with his fiancé. They had yet to make solid plans towards their actual marriage and something within him was aching to cross that final step to making Die his husband. 

He swallowed hard, wringing his hands together as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed, breathing out a sigh. Finally, he picked up his phone and texted his lover, not wanting to yell. _"Die, can you come to the bedroom for a moment?"_

Die had been settled out on the porch, the bunny rushing around the yard and Snow sitting in his lap, purring up a storm when his phone dinged, signaling he had a text message. Grunting, he moved to get the phone out of his pocket and placed the cat on the ground. He read the message and sent back a quick reply. _Yeah, give me a sec to get the pets back in._

With that, he went about putting the cat back inside and then gathering up the rabbit and placing him back in his cage just inside the door. He locked up and then moved to the kitchen and washed up. Finally, he trekked up the stairs and into the bedroom, a slight furrow between his brows indicating his worry.

Kyo got Die's reply then turned his phone off. He stood up then sat down again, closing his eyes tightly for a moment before opening them when he heard his lover on the stairs. He clasped his hands in his lap to keep them from shaking and looked up as the other entered the room. "We....need to talk."

Die took in how Kyo was situated and the obvious nervousness radiating from his lover, and that was all it took or his stomach to plummet as if he'd jumped from a plane and was hurdling towards Earth headfirst. He slid his hand into his pocket and slid the switch of his phone to put it on vibrate before he gave a single nod and moved into the room.

By some grace of the gods he managed to keep his hands from shaking or his movements from giving away just how sick he felt at those words. All he could imagine was what horrible things were to come, something he'd done sometime in the past having surfaced or Kyo finally having realized he didn't want to be with Die any longer. Whatever it was, Die wasn't at all prepared for it, and he could feel his stomach churning horribly as he awkwardly pulled over the small foot stool from the single chair in the corner and settled across from Kyo, certain he didn't want anything to do with the bed right then. 

Kyo watched Die, immediately mentally smacking himself for putting it that way. He could see the dread on his lover's face as he settled on the foot stool rather than the bed. A sigh escaped him, and he reached out with both hands towards Die. "It's not anything like that, darling...it's just...I've been thinking a lot the last week or so." He shifted again, almost finding it hard to come up with the words he wanted to say. Finally, he just blurted out the simplest thing he could think of in explanation. "I think we should.....get married."

Die's response was instant; he was off the stool and into Kyo's arms in a heartbeat, his face tucked against the other's neck as he nearly crushed the vocalist against himself. His entire body trembled slightly as relief coursed its way through him. "Thank the gods," he breathed out, kissing Kyo's cheek hard.

Kyo gasped at the other's reaction, his mind taking a few moments to catch up before he slipped his arms around his lover, hugging him tightly. "I'm sorry, love...I could have...proposed that differently." He huffed out a breath, turning to kiss the side of Die's mouth.

Forcing himself to breathe, Die backed up and settled again, though he pulled the stool closer before he sat back down. "Okay... now that... I'm not freaking out. Ah..." he blushed and then chuckled, "what was this about the all elusive topic?"

Kyo laughed softly before clearing his throat, moving to hold onto Die's hands. "I just...well, you know my cousin got married last month...and ever since his wedding, I've been...thinking of our own..." He bit his lip for a moment, looking at the other. "Die, I'm ready...ready to call you my husband."

For a moment, Die wasn't entirely sure what to do or even say. It took him a while, but he finally got himself kick-started again and then breathed out a soft, "Are.... you're serious?"

Kyo licked his lips again, suddenly feeling nervous once more. He squeezed Die's hands a little too hard, nodding his head. "Yeah...I am. It's been....far too long."

Standing up, Die gently tugged Kyo up with him and led the way out of the bedroom and to the spare bedroom instead. He opened the door and slipped inside, letting go of Kyo's hand to pull out a small box. Upon opening it, he revealed an iPad and a binder along with a few magazines on wedding placements. He cast Kyo a slightly embarrassed look as he settled on the bed, curling one leg under himself.

Kyo blinked confusedly when Die pulled him up and into the spare bedroom. He stepped in behind his lover and looked at the box, peering at the supplies inside it. Guilt washed over him as he began to realize just how much Die had been wanting this. 

"Die....you.... gods, I'm sorry I've left you waiting this long. Why didn't you say anything?" He moved to sit next to the guitarist on the bed.

Die lifted one shoulder in a half-hearted shrug, his heart doing a little clenching number in his chest, anxiety pulling at the edges of his consciousness. But he stuffed it back down and forced himself to breathe, finally murmuring a quiet, "I just didn't want to be that nagging person who keeps on talking about it. I figured it'd either happen eventually or...," another shrug, though this one was anything but genuine, "it wouldn't."

Kyo felt a pain slice through him at Die's last statement, his breath catching for a moment. "Ah, Die...darling..." He didn't know what else to say so he reached out and ran his hand over the binder, flicking his eyes to Die's face. "Share with me?"

Die shifted over on the bed and patted the area beside him, tugging the binder over onto his lap and then flipping it open, the first page a picture of the pair of them at the engagement party that one of the guests had taken and sent back to Die.

Kyo moved and settled next to Die, peering at the picture with a smile. "This one is really good..." He traced his finger over Die's face on the photo, sighing softly. It seemed like that party had been a lifetime ago.

Die nodded a little, moving just a tad so that he was directly against Kyo's side, glued to him. He turned the page, revealing a candle setting for the center of a table, just a simple cylindrical glass with a rosebud in the center, clear craft glue holding it into the glass, four smaller votives around it, each holding a white candle, and rose petals scattered between them. "I ah... thought... maybe... for the centerpiece." He sounded so unsure of himself, in all honesty.

The vocalist leaned against Die when he shifted closer. He peered at the photograph of the proposed centerpiece, studying it for a few moments. "It's so elegant but simple. I like it. It's not like the gaudy stuff you usually see..."

"Yeah, and it's inexpensive, too..." Die bit his lip for a moment before releasing it. "I was thinking perhaps we could... donate the money we don't use to something really useful and nice." He turned the page, revealing a list of charities he'd done research on.

The opposite page had a sample invitation, a simple black envelope with a red card. The printed part was white with a black border, centered in the red sheet. A single red, silk bow held it in place on the backer sheet and the bottom part of the envelope held the reply card and reminder slip, both done in the same colors and style.

Kyo nodded, smiling to himself at Die's charitable intentions. "That would be nice..." He noted the charities, considering a couple of them before flicking his eyes to the next page. There were invitations there in what he could only see as perfect colors for them. "Wow...," he breathed out. "Die...you've...really planned this out...didn't you?"

Die ducked his head a little and then nodded. "Yeah... but... ah... this isn't anything hard, just... options." Not that he hadn't filled the bottom of the box with the other _options_ he'd already discarded. But all the same, this was supposed to be picked out between them, not just him doing it.

He flipped the page and revealed a seating arrangement that had caught his eye. The table was draped in black and then each place setting had a red cloth draped down the side of the table. A single long-stemmed glass sat at each place, silverware alongside the red cloths and little memento pouches on each cloth to help hold them in place until the guests sat down as well as give the guests something to take home from it. The middle of the table held a runner done in an elegant white and black print. He tapped the page. "Ignore that gaudy centerpiece," he pointed at a huge white frosted tree with random things dangling from it. "But with the little glass votives, I think it'd be elegant."

Kyo studied the page, chewing his bottom lip. His first reaction to the centerpiece was a wince but then Die was saying ignore it so he relaxed. "I can really see this coming together..."

Die flipped the page and revealed two pictures of similar cakes. There was a four tiered round white cake with a design of brown branches and white sakura blossoms. The second was still white and four tiered, but bigger and with red sakura blossoms instead.

Kyo shifted a bit then looked at the cakes, humming softly. "These are so lovely..." He pointed to the one with the red petals, smiling. "I like this one the best though, I think..."

Die smiled softly at the comment and pulled out the white one and tossed it into the bottom of the box. He then pulled out the iPad and went about turning it on and then opening the variety of catering menus.

Kyo watched Die toss the white one into the bottom, frowning slightly. "Don't get rid of it on my account, love...if you're attached to something...I'm not going to make you change it."

Die shook his head. "No, I was torn between them, so you have made a decision which is good." He shifted the iPad closer to Kyo and opened the first menu. "There's like four places that are reasonably priced but high quality and discrete."

The vocalist hummed and nodded at Die's response. "Very well..." He took the iPad and got it to where he could see it well before looking over the menus. "Hmm, I think there should be a decent variety but...then again...maybe traditional?"

"The second one has stuff that's more traditional, third calls itself fusion, and the last one is a really strange conglomeration of things. They're all agreeable, so honestly, pick whichever you like, and we can price it out from there." He paused, looking down at his hands and then tilting his head back, blinking rapidly a few dozen times.

Kyo nodded, pulling the second one up and enlarging it to view the choices before going to third one. He opened his mouth to give Die his decision but noticed the look on his lover's face, a frown crossing his own. "Die..?"

A soft breathy laugh left Die, and he shook his head a little. "I just... god, I've waited so long for this day, and I'm sort of in shock."

Kyo blinked then smiled softly, leaning over to nuzzle against Die's neck. "I love you, darling...I'm sorry to have kept you waiting..."

Die slid his arm around Kyo's shoulders and pulled him closer, closing his eyes and just sitting there for a moment. "I'm trembling inside."

Kyo wrapped an arm around Die's waist, squeezing him tightly. "I...honestly am, too. I almost feel sick to my stomach." He huffed out a laugh, closing his eyes. "I truly am sorry it's been so long. I...am not good with these things, you know that..."

Die stuffed the iPad back into the box and pushed it aside before shifting down on the bed and tugging Kyo with him. He just curled up next to him and reached to stroke over his cheek gently. "I love you."

Kyo let out a little sound as he was pulled down but he quickly shifted and adjusted himself, curling against Die. "I love you, too, Koi." He lifted his head and pressed his lips against Die's, kissing him softly.

Die returned the kiss for a moment before snuggling into the pillows and just studying his lover. "You make me happier than I could ever manage to express, no matter how late this is or not."

Kyo reached up to cup Die's cheek, a smile on his face, his eyes shining with emotion. "I'm glad...so glad..."

Yawning, Die groaned and then rolled onto his back. "Mmm... we can look at more later, I'm exhausted... emotionally." He huffed out a little chuckle.

Kyo gave a laugh himself and nodded. "Okay, if you'd like..." He shifted around, moving to rest his hand on Die's chest, his head pillowed on the other's arm.

Reaching for Kyo's hand, Die placed it on his side and then did the same to Kyo, closing his eyes and just smiling softly as he remained there. "Thank you..."

Kyo hummed, stroking the area where his hand was placed. "You're welcome, darling."


	77. Chapter 77

Die could honestly say it had been a long month. He'd spent most of his free time working on planning the rest of the pieces of the wedding... or more gathering options for Kyo's consideration and approval. And the rest of the time was spent working on the upcoming album. Kyo had so many things to do with Sukekiyo that he was always running around ,and Die had started to accept more and more offers to hang out with his friends he'd been partly neglecting in the past year or so.

With the variety of things that they had both been doing, the time for Die and Kyo to actually do anything more than simply sleep in the same bed had become something of a novel concept. Die spent far more time just collapsing into bed next to an already passed out Kyo than he preferred to admit.

He'd been doing his best to keep his sexual needs on the down-low given he didn't like to wake Kyo up for such things. But tonight, he had been lying in bed for nearly an hour already, doing his best to sleep and failing miserably. He was achingly hard and just didn't feel like getting up to traipse back into the living room to find some porn or into the bathroom for a quick one-off. He craved the contact of his lover over anything else, and it left him anxious and on the verge of upset to think of not having him. 

Despite that, he finally shifted minutely, pushing the covers off of himself and then reaching for Kyo's hand, knowing it wouldn't wake his lover, as it never had before. Linking their fingers, he turned his head to make sure the other wasn't waking up. When he was sure he wasn't, he pushed his boxer briefs down in the front, revealing his fully erect length and wrapped his free hand around the shaft, starting to very slowly stroke it, his gaze on Kyo's face as he worked himself. Faintly, he breathed out, "I need you," though it wasn't nearly loud enough to wake the vocalist, much less meet his ears.

Kyo had indeed been very busy lately with his various projects; today had been no exception. When he'd returned home, he'd had just enough energy to eat dinner with Die, go over some bills that needed tended, take a shower then collapse into bed. 

He'd fallen asleep almost instantly and remained so even while Die started moving around. It wasn't until his dream whispered Die's spoken words to him that his eyes popped open, focusing on the shadowy ceiling. 

He frowned slightly at the dream, closing his eyes before he realized that his hand was being held. The next thing to occur to him was the fact that his lover was moving in a very familiar way. Turning his head, he caught Die's gaze, a slow smile spreading across his face. "Well, good morning to you, too," he murmured.

Die's immediate reaction was to stop what he was doing and attempt to very, very slowly move his hand to get the edge of the sheet pull it over himself. He gave Kyo a small smile in return and murmured, "It's not morning." Squeezing the other's hand, he murmured, "I didn't mean to wake you; I'm sorry." Leaning in gently, he kissed the tip of Kyo's nose and then retreated, curling up on his side instead in an attempt to hide his very erect cock with his bent knees. Still he held Kyo's hand, refusing to let it go.

Kyo watched Die's actions with some amount of regret, though he found himself growing aroused despite that. He let out a quiet huff of a laugh, rolling over to face Die. "You didn't wake me...a dream did." He flicked his eyes down then back up to Die's face, shifting closer to his lover. "Darling, please tell me you're not trying to _hide_ the fact that you were just jerking off..."

Die shifted slightly in what could only be described as an embarrassed manner. He sniffed slightly and then stifled a yawn before murmuring, "Ah... well... I'd... be lying?"

Kyo clucked his tongue and reached out, pushing on Die's shoulder. "Get on your back...please?"

Die huffed slightly. "Well, if you'd like me to pitch a lovely tent in the sheets, then sure." He rolled back over, laughing just after.

Kyo offered a soft laugh then smirked at his lover as he rolled on top of him for a moment. He leaned down and kissed him deeply before shimmying his way down beneath the covers and between Die's legs. He pushed the other's boxers further out of his way then leaned in and flicked his tongue of the head of Die's cock, his hand wrapping around the base.

Die let out a rough groan as Kyo moved down his body, throwing one arm over his eyes as the vocalist's tongue flicked over the head of his cock. His body trembled for a moment before he stilled and then let out a somewhat relieved breath. "Needed you so much," he whimpered out.

Kyo hummed softly, giving Die's length a few strokes. "It's been too long...," he replied before taking his lover between his lips, swirling his tongue over the a few times then sliding down. Once he was about halfway, he began slowly bobbing his head, unable to help the deep moan that escaped him.

Die's other hand came down to rest lightly on the back of Kyo's head as the other bobbed over his length. He closed his eyes and let out a soft moan. "Feels so good."

Kyo responded to Die's words by taking him deeper, still moving slowly. As he bobbed his head, he slid his free hand up to stroke over Die's abdomen, lightly scratching the area. Between his own legs, his cock was fully hard, pressing against the front of his boxers.

Die's hand slid down to take Kyo's hand again, gently cradling it as he tilted his head back and moaned, his hips bucking upwards. "Please," he murmured softly, "I need more... I need you."

Kyo squeezed Die's hand when it founds his own. With a groan, he lifted his head, unable to resist giving the head of Die's cock a few flicks with his tongue. He finally sat up fully, pushing the covers from them both as he gazed down at Die, stroking his hand over his hip. "How do you want me?"

"Take me," Die pleaded softly, "I just..." he shook his head, unable to find the words he needed.

Kyo smiled softly, leaning down to kiss his lover deeply, pushing his hand into the other's hair. "As you wish." He shifted back and rid Die completely of his clothes before doing the same for himself. After, he reached over to get the lube from the bedside table, flipping the top and pouring a good amount onto his fingers. 

Finally, he slid his hand between Die's legs, lightly brushing over his entrance. "It has been too long...."

Die gasped faintly when the other's fingers faintly touched his entrance. He spread his legs a bit more and positioned his hips in such a manner that it would help. His lower lip caught between his teeth, and he shivered slightly.

Kyo gently stroked his fingers over Die's puckered skin, taking his time before finally pushing a single digit into the other's body. As he started working it in and out, he leaned down to press his face against Die's neck, licking the skin there.

Die gasped faintly, squirming a little under the penetration, not all that used to it since it'd been a while. He breathed out, "I haven't... even myself... be patient with me?"

The vocalist's eyes widened slightly at that news, having expected Die to be taking care of himself even while Kyo had been too busy to do so. He tilted his head up, pressing his lips against the other's ear, whispering quietly, “I thought you felt tighter..." 

He eased up slightly, working his finger in and out more slowly than he had been before ramping it up once more.

Die finally managed to relax himself a bit, breathing calmly as he arched a bit into the touches, only winching slightly once. He spread himself wider and pushed his hips up.

Kyo moved his free hand down to wrap around Die's cock, seeking to distract him as he added a second finger. He took the time to spread and scissor his fingers before starting to thrust again. "I'm so hard," he breathed out against Die's neck, pushing his hips forward slightly.

A small grunt left Die's mouth as the other pressed against him. "I can't wait to have that inside me.... but at the same time, I need to wait." Die let out a strained sort of sound and then settled.

"I know..." Kyo huffed out one impatient sound then relaxed, focusing his attention on making sure Die was comfortable. He reached for the lube again, adding more to his fingers as he pushed them into the other's body, trying to keep an even pacing.

Die shifted around and then settled again, closing his eyes and finally whimpering out, "Just do it, I can't wait."

Kyo groaned, hesitating for a moment before easing his fingers out of Die's body. He shifted around so that he was in between his lover's legs, spreading them slightly. He quickly added lube to his length then positioned himself at Die's entrance, pressing forward, easing into Die's body.

Die's back arched as Kyo entered him, a hitching breath sucking in before he just help his breath and closed his eyes. When he finally let it out, he shivered, his cock straining away from his body for a second.

Kyo watched Die's face as he pushed into him, a low moan leaving him. His lover's reactions never failed to ignite a fire within him. He slid the rest of the way in, burying himself to the hilt with a soft cry of pleasure. "Die..."

Die let out a quiet whine and then began to fuck himself on Kyo's dick, unable to hold himself back at all. He panted as he fucked himself against his lover's cock, biting on his lower lip.

The way Die started moving against him had Kyo shivering. He leaned down, placing his hands on either side of Die's head before starting to match his thrusts, ramping things up quickly. "Fuck...s'been too long."

Reaching down, Die began jacking himself off, moaning wantonly in response to Kyo's words, still moving with him, unable to keep himself from doing so. His free hand came up to press against the wall behind him, muscles flexing as he pushed back against it, panting from the effort he was putting out.

Kyo huffed out a breath, snapping his hips forward harder. He glanced down between them to watch what Die was doing, unable to do anything but moan. He finally shifted slightly to push Die's thigh up a bit, changing angles as he slammed into him.

The new angle made Die gasp and stiffen, his muscles tensing as he began to jack off even faster, the muscles in his biceps and neck straining.

The vocalist groaned, moving his hand from Die's thigh to wrap around his lover's as he jacked off. "Die...need to feel you..," he gasped out, thrusting harder into the other's body, his cock throbbing.

"You're about to," Die ground out, working himself faster, his nipples starting to harden, his head pushing back against the pillows. Finally, his eyes sild closed and he groaned out, "Oh shi-" as thick spurts of cum began raining down on his abdomen.

Kyo pulled his hand away from Die's, moving to tweak a nipple as it hardened. When Die started cumming, he let out a loud groan, pausing to feel his lover's inner walls clench around him. "Fuck!" After a moment, he started thrusting again, reaching for his end.

Die's hand finally stilled, falling to the side as the rest of his cum leaked down his shaft as he lay there, looking a bit dazed, still arching into Kyo's thrusts.

It didn't take much longer for Kyo to find his bliss, a keening moan leaving him as he slammed hard into Die once more. His cock throbbing hard for a second before he started cumming, spurt after spurt filling Die's passage. "Die!"

Die reached up, clinging to Kyo's bicep for a second and then sort of collapsing back against the bed. After a moment, he breathed out, "God my cock is still so fucking hard."

Kyo let out a breath, shuddering as he leaned down, pressing his face against Die's neck. "I noticed..." He nipped at the skin of Die's neck, taking his time for the time being. "Don't think for a minute that I'm finished with you..."

"You better not be... I think I'd end up humping the bed if you were," Die returned.

Kyo chuckled, stroking his hand over Die's messy stomach, moving up to smear cum over one of his nipples. He tweaked and rolled the bud then moved to the other side as he worked his way up to nip at Die's earlobe.

Die gasped at the cum over his nipple, whispering out, "O-oh," in a rather obviously aroused manner.

Kyo smirked, flicking his tongue into Die's ear then moving to kiss his lips, his hand still fondling his nipples. He kept the kiss slow and languid before he ducked his head down to lave his tongue over the other's Adam's apple, sucking the protrusion nearly hard enough to leave a mark.

Die breathed out a little moan and then whined as he squirmed under his lover, the feeling of Kyo's cock inside him causing him to shiver. "Fuck, baby..."

Kyo moaned as well, giving his hips a tiny rock as he scraped his teeth across Die's throat. Finally, he lifted his head again, gazing down at his lover's face. "You're so goddamned gorgeous, you know that?" 

He shifted back, easing out of Die's body gently, a groan leaving him as some of his cum dribbled out. "Get on your knees for me?"

Die scooted out from under him and then went to roll over and get on his knees. Leaning his top half down on the bed, he closed his eyes, waiting on whatever was to come to him.

Kyo watched as Die got on his knees for him, licking his lips. "What a gorgeous view," he murmured, sliding his hand over Die's ass, squeezing a handful of his cheek. On a whim, he leaned down and nipped the skin he'd just released.

Die gasped softly when the other nipped at his cheek. After a few moments of deliberation and near-war with himself, he finally breathed out, "Lick me?" his voice sounding a little uncertain.

A moan slipped from Kyo's lips at Die's words. He shifted and spread Die's cheeks wide, blowing out a teasing puff of air over the puckered flesh. "Gladly," he replied before dipping his head down, starting to lap at Die's crack.

Die cried out the moment the other started to lick over his hole. Clenching a bit, he shivered and stuffed his face against the bed. "Oh my fucking god," came the muffled sound of his voice. "Like that, just like that."

Kyo moaned again and started eating Die's ass, making sloppy sounds. He eventually pressed his tongue against Die's hole, pushing in past the ring of muscle, wriggling it."Mnnn..."

Die wriggled around and then whined loudly. "J-just lick, too much!" Whimpering, Die bucked a little.

Kyo pulled back, resuming running the flat of his tongue along Die's crack. As he did, he slid his hand up Die's spine, scratching the skin a little harder than usual.

Die shuddered, arching his back and then gasping softly. "Feels so good." Die whimpered faintly, shoving his head into the bed again, rubbing his head there.

Kyo lifted his head, licking his lips. "You taste amazing...I need to do this more often." He chuckled and dipped his head back down, circling Die's anus with his tongue then sliding it down further to flick over the back of his sac.

Die let out a huff of a sound and then closed his eyes. "You're lovely," he murmured softly in return.

Kyo moaned in response, sliding up to lick at Die's hole again before sitting back. He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and raised up on his knees, grinding his hard cock against Die's ass.

Die gasped. "Fuck me again, baby... come on, use that lovely cock on me."

Kyo was happy to comply, shifting back and pushing into Die without hesitation, a groan of pleasure leaving him. "Gladly," he groaned out as he started fucking Die hard and fast.

Die knew he was going to be sore in the morning, after not going at it for a while and then doing it twice in one night, it always stung a bit no matter how careful they were. But it was amazing and completely worth it for everything he was going through, that much was for damn fucking sure.

Kyo hunched over Die, panting slightly as he fucked him. He was wild with lust, unable to take anything into consideration other than the fact that his cock was hard and pushing into Die felt too damn good to stop.

The whole time, Die made little sounds that could have only been described as porn star sounds, unable to stop them from pouring out of his mouth every few seconds. It just felt too damn good to stop, honestly, and putting a voice to it made it feel even better.

The sounds spilling from Die's mouth only fueled Kyo on, his hips snapping loudly against Die's. "Fuck yes!" he cried out, his body tense with the effort of fucking his lover.

Die wasn't entirely sure he could cum again so soon, but he was definitely riding the high of what was happening right then. He bowed his back, tilting himself a bit and letting Kyo's cock hit him just right. "Fuck!"

Kyo could feel the way he was hitting home by the way Die was bowing beneath him. He slowed down but kept at the same angle, thrusting over Die's prostate as he shuddered. "You feel so _fucking_ good!"

Die fisted his hand and hit the bed harshly, closing his eyes and then growling out in a near-desperate fashion.

Kyo kept up his slower thrusts for a while before eventually building back up the pace. He groaned and reached under Die, wrapping his hand around his length, stroking him as he fucked him.

Die's hand instantly shot down to grasp Kyo's wrist, holding onto it tightly. "C-can't, not yet," he panted out, the shock of arousal too much, too soon for him.

Kyo grunted, pulling his hand away to rest it on Die's abdomen instead. He didn't know how much longer he could hold back, his orgasm nearing. "Die...fuck!"

"Give it to me!" Die cried out, pushing back toward the other's body again and again. "Please!"

The vocalist couldn't hold back if he wanted to. He slid his hands up to grasp Die's hips, pushing into him with increased speed and fervor. It took him only another moment before he was crying out, his body shuddering as he came, shooting spurt after spurt into Die's body.

Die groaned, closing his eyes and then shivering as he felt the cum spurting into his body. "Yes... god baby, I can feel your warmth."

Kyo continued humping into Die as he came, groaning as the last spurt exited his body. Finally, he stilled, slumping slightly against Die. "Gods...."

Die lay there panting, his eyes closed as he just tried to come down with all that had just happened in the past few minutes. He kept his head bowed, doing his best to breathe evenly.

Kyo didn't move, his forehead pressed against Die's back as he fought to catch his breath. He wanted to finish Die off but the way his lover wasn't pushing for it told him it was okay for the moment.

"I love you," Die murmured very quietly.

Kyo smiled against Die's back, shifting to stroke his hands over Die's skin. "I love you, too, Koi..."

"Can you just stay in me until you can't any longer?" Die asked softly.

The vocalist hummed and nodded, moving slightly to enable himself to stay pushed against Die's body. "Of course, darling."

Die just lay there, panting quietly for a few minutes until he reached down and slid his hand around his own cock, starting to stroke off just a bit.

Kyo could feel Die's actions, a soft smile sliding on his face. He slipped his hand back beneath Die, wrapping his fingers over the other's, helping to stroke him.

It didn't take very long before Die let out a quiet grunt and spilled over both of their fingers, a sigh spilling out of his lips just after. Relief washed through him and he started to collapse against the bed, slowly deflating against it.

Kyo pressed a kiss to Die's spine as the other came, his hand sliding up to rub over the head of his dick lightly before pulling away. He kept his position, just moving down with Die, staying against him as well as he could.


	78. Chapter 78

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Things had grown more and more hectic with Kyo's upcoming tour of Europe and their recording of the entire new Dir en grey album. In a lot of ways, Die was glad for the excitement and business. It left them exhausted a good lot of the time, but it just felt nice to him to be where they were in their lives. He was determined to have more fun with his guitar-work this album, and the few concerts he'd held with the side-band he'd been playing with had left him pumped up for a new sort of era of Dir en grey.

With all of that, he and Kyo had been mostly interacting on a very vanilla sexual level rather than on the more varied and strange side of things. As such it had been nearly two months since it had been anything other than stick your dick there or here and roll over and go back to bed... and once in a while, roll over and get up to get ready for work.

At long last, Die grew impatient and made up his own mind on what they were going to do, something he'd been putting off for a long time. As such, he woke up nearly an hour before Kyo, showering and dressing himself and then pulling out a specific outfit for Kyo to wear. Finally, he settled on the bed beside the vocalist, reaching down to lightly tap his finger on the head of the other's morning wood, a smirk on his lips as he waited on it to wake Kyo up.

Kyo lay there for a several moments while Die tapped at his cock. He had fallen in bed exhausted last night and was sleeping fairly soundly. Eventually though, he came awake with a groggy groan and push of his hips. Cracking his eyes open, he squinted blearily at Die, huffing out another groan as his cock flexed. "Well, good morning," he mumbled, his voice hoarse from sleep.

Die deliberated his lover for a few moments before he finally stuck his tongue out, licking over his lips before returning it to his mouth again. "You, my dear, are in for a day built from hell itself." He tilted his head a little and then stood up. "From this moment forward you are utterly under my control. Do you have a safe word in mind?"

Kyo peered at Die, pulling his lip between his teeth as the other spoke. A soft groan left him as his cock twitched at the idea of what Die had in mind. He gave a nod, his safe word flashing in his mind briefly. "I do."

"Say it." Die didn't like to fuck with it. He liked having the knowledge between them that they both were aware of it, refreshed and re-spoken before things ever got started. Particularly with the day he had in mind for the other, he couldn't deal with it unless he knew for sure.

Kyo smiled slightly at Die's insistence on him speaking the safe word aloud. His lover was thorough when it came to his comfort and safety during these sessions. "Bananas."

Die reached to lightly cup Kyo's cheek, leaning in and pressing his lips against Kyo's own. A moment later, he backed up and then lifted his arms over his head, stretching, his belly showing to the other as he did. "First rule, you do not even touch your dick without permission. Now... get in the shower. Do not piss first."

Kyo returned the kiss then nodded, wincing slightly as he sat up, his bladder quite full after sitting all night. He crawled out of the bed and made his way to the shower, turning it on and stepping in. With the sound of the water and being upright, not pissing was proving to be difficult.

Die followed Kyo into the bathroom, coming to rest with one hip against the counter. "I'm so glad I got you sleep naked these days... the view of your ass in the morning is just a great start to every single day."

Kyo gave a quiet chuckle then groaned as his bladder spasmed. "I have to piss so bad, it almost hurts," he complained, sudsing up his hair. His cock had not relaxed even a little bit, either, rendering him rock hard and aching. He wondered how long he was going to be in this sort of misery, even though the idea of Die being in total control excited him.

Die let out a chuckle as he debated it for a second. "Piss outside the shower. On the floor." The drain in the floor would make anything done okay anyway, Die knew that, but it was dirtier this way... and gave him a reason to spray down the bathroom floor while Kyo was in the shower, he supposed.

Kyo gave a sigh of relief and pushed the curtain aside, standing there in full view of Die. He reached for his cock, then remember the rule about not touching his dick. He groaned and just focused on trying to piss, finally succeeding to get a couple of spurts out before his cock softened enough to allow him to finish. He held onto the wall as he relieved himself onto the floor, watching the puddle form then slowly begin to go down the drain.

Arousal surged hot through Die's body as he watched Kyo do something so utterly forbidden. But he remained passive, not really reacting to the situation until Kyo was done, gesturing him back into the shower. "Finish your shower. You may touch your cock long enough to wash it. And don't try my patience with it."

With that, he grabbed the little hose next to the toilet and began spraying down the floor.

Kyo stared at Die as he finished up, seeing the unmistakable lust flashing in Die's eyes. He bit his lip, slipping back into the shower. "Yes, Sir," he quipped, resuming washing himself. He finished up quickly, despite the temptation to fondle himself for a few moments. Turning the water off, he stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel to begin drying himself.

Die finished up with the floor fairly quickly, putting some of the cleaning spray on it and then rinsing it once more before Kyo was done in the shower. "Watch out; it's wet everywhere out here," he murmured before stepping into the hallway. "You have five minutes of privacy to finish other things you may need to do. After that, I am your shadow."

Kyo stepped gingerly over to the sink to brush his teeth. He glanced up when Die said he had five minutes and decided to take care of another sort of issue. Once he'd gotten that out of the way, he washed his hands then finally brushed his teeth as well as combing his hair and applying Die's favorite cologne. 

Forgoing any sort of covering, he stepped out of the bathroom and looked up at Die. "I am Yours..."

Die pointed at the dresser the moment Kyo appeared in the bedroom, where he'd gone to sit and wait on him. "Your outfit for the day." 

It consisted of a pair of black fake-leather pants and a white Chrome Hearts shirt from Die's own closet. A pair of bright red newly acquired underwear sat on top along with a rather bulbous butt-plug and a small bottle of lube to help with insertion. "All of that is your clothing for the day."

Kyo stared at the dresser, taking in the outfit and his "accessories" for the day. A soft sound left him his he moved to picked up the butt-plug and lube. He looked at Die for a minute the stepped over to the bed, lying on his back. After squirting lube onto the plug, he reached between his legs and started easing it in, unable to stop the moan that bubbled up in his throat as it stretched his passage. 

He finally got it into place and laid there for a few moments, his cock hardening once more. He got up and grabbed the red underwear, tugging them on and then reaching for the other clothes. One he had the pants and slightly too big shirt on, he looked to Die again.

Die watched the whole goings-on with avid interest, finally smirking as Kyo finished up and went about getting his clothing on instead. He lightly patted the other's lower back and then stood up ever so carefully. "Good. Now you have to ask me if you need it out... for any reason."

Kyo licked his lips and nodded, squirming where he stood. "Understood." He didn't sit down again, the pressure of the plug already providing quite a bit of stimulation.

"If at any point you can't help it and you're going to cum, I need to know immediately." Die came over and pulled Kyo to him, his hand sliding down over his backside and then pushing lightly on the plug through his clothing.

The vocalist nodded, reaching out to wrap his arms around Die's waist when the other pulled him close. A soft sound left him as the other pushed against the plug, his back stiffening slightly. "It already feels so good," he murmured, the tent in his pants testament to that.

"I bet it does, darling." Die licked his lips a little and then chuckled. "Have fun with that." He quickly pushed it a few more times and then let go, stepping away and making his way out of the bedroom. "You get to pick your shoes. I'll let you do that."

Kyo huffed a little then let out a whine as Die teased him some more. When the other released him and told him he could pick his shoes, he snorted and moved to the closet. "How nice of you..." He grabbed his boots and a pair of socks then headed downstairs. "So....I don't suppose you're going to tell me how long I have to wear this, are you?"

"You are correct, sir." Die plodded off toward the kitchen, grabbing a bag that was filled with their lunch for the day at the studio and all their various snacks to refill the fridges and cabinets, which had been running low. He passed the bag to Kyo and then went straight for the door. "One minute and counting to be ready to leave."

Kyo huffed a little and took the bag, carrying it and his shoes to the door. He eased himself down onto the step to put his socks and boots on, letting out a soft groan as the plug was pushed deeper. He made quick work of getting his boots on and grabbing his own bag, shouldering it and making his way outside. He shot Die a slight glare as he arrived at the car. "You do know that I'm going to be sitting most of the day, right?"

Die leaned against the car door, gazing at Kyo as he made his way to the car. Once he spoke up, Die simply grinned at him, a cheeky sort of look. "Of course!" He slid into the car and slammed the door shut, looking for all the world like the cat that got the cream.

Kyo pursed his lips, wondering if the plug was the only torture he was going to endure today or if his lover had more in mind. Either way, it was going to be hard to hide his ongoing erection from the other band members. He had a feeling Die had been counting on that, too. With a sigh, he put their stuff into the back then slid into the passenger seat, groaning as the plug hit his prostate with the movement. "Fuck," he breathed out, attempting to get his seatbelt on.

Die simply started the engine, pretending to ignore Kyo's plight, but enjoying it the entire time, regardless. Once the other was fully buckled in, Die pulled out of the driveway and headed for the studio at what was a nauseatingly slow pace, given how early in the morning it was. 

About ten minutes into their drive, with no traffic in sight and Die going _under_ the speed limit, Kyo looked over at him like he was crazy. After another few minutes, he figured out it was part of the deviant guitarist's plan to torture, and he gave up on trying to find any other reason in it. 

About forty minutes into the drive, Die finally pulled over into an empty parallel parking space in front of a Starbucks, pulling out his wallet and handing Kyo a few bills. "Go get some of those sweet rolls." He grinned at the end, showing he was just being a jerk on purpose, not for any other reason.

 

When they pulled up at the Starbucks, Kyo barely bit back an impatient groan. "Yeah, yeah, I'll get it," he groused, taking the bills and slipping out of the car. He entered the coffee shop and placed his order and then moved to stand by the counter to wait.

It was only a few minutes when the name he'd given was called, and he went and gathered up the sweet rolls. Carrying them back out to the car, he set them on the roof and opened the door before grabbing Die's and offering it to him.

Die took his sweet roll once the other came back with it, having been amusing himself by cruising the radio stations ever so slowly in the meantime. Currently, they were stuck on a pop/rap station with really spritely American music blaring from the speakers. He took one sniff of the proffered item and carefully placed it in the cup holder area. Contented, he sat back and ordered, "In."

Kyo watched Die as he sipped the drink then sighed with relief when the other seemed satisfied. He got back into the car with his own sweet roll, grunting as he settled down. He re-buckled then looked at Die. "Can I eat or should I wait?"

"No napkins, no licking your fingers, I want to see the mess you make." With that, Die eased out into the traffic that had since formed and began the tedious job of heading toward the studio once again.

Kyo nodded his consent and opened the bag, pulling out the cinnamon one and biting into it. Within a few moments, he had glaze painted on his lips and partially on his chin. His fingers were completely covered as well. After he'd finally finished it, he looked to Die, wondering how long he'd have to stay sticky.

Die had stopped at a light by the time the other had finished his roll. He studied him for a few moments and then looked back at the traffic in front of him. "Let me lick each and every finger, darling. One at a time."

Kyo bit his lip as a spike of lust coursed through him at Die's request. He lifted his hand, holding out his thumb for Die, watching him with anticipation. Die opened his mouth and simply waited, not interested in taking his eyes off the stop-and-go traffic to see what Kyo was or was not doing for the time being. Kyo inserted his thumb into Die's mouth once it was open. He pushed it in and held it there, waiting for his lover to lick it. Die sucked on the digit for a few moments until it was clean and then just opened his mouth once again, waiting on the next one.

Kyo groaned softly as Die sucked on his thumb. He squirmed in his seat a bit then inserted his finger once Die released his thumb. "We're almost there," he informed quietly, looking at the street signs

For the duration of the ride, Die finished cleaning off one of Kyo's hands and then waved a dismissive hand at him. "Clean up."

Kyo pulled his hand away and grabbed a napkin, doing his best to get the sticky glaze off of him. He managed to get most of it and then decided he'd hit the washroom once they arrived at the studio.

Finally, they arrived at the studio, Die pulling into the parking structure and then cutting the engine. He took a moment, closing his eyes and then reaching down to fondle over the bulge in his pants. He glanced at the time, seeing they still had fifteen minutes and then wet his lips, a deviant sort of look in his eyes as he unzipped his jeans and then pulled his half-erect length free, exposing it to the air of the car as they sat there.

Kyo glanced over in time to see Die pulling his cock out. A groan left him and his own body responded eagerly, his pants tightening even more than they already were. "Die...," he murmuring, gazing at the other's cock with a hungry look.

"Hush," Die returned, a small smirk on his lips as he reached down and began stroking over his cock, drawing it to full hardness. He bit his lip lightly as he began to get a bit more vigorous with it, letting out a small panting moan. "Watch for anyone..." he murmured. "Make sure we're not being watched."

Kyo stared at Die's cock for a few more moments then did as he was told. He looked out the windows, checking for people. "There's someone getting in their car, but no one else." He squirmed in his seat, letting out a gasp as the plug shifted just so inside of him.

Sinking down further into the chair, Die reached for the lever to let his seat back just a tiny bit so he was reclined slightly. He arched into it and grasped his cock a bit harshly, going at himself with renewed fervor.

Kyo tried to keep an eye out but couldn't help straying to look at Die every few minutes. He was rock hard by now and dying to touch both himself and Die. He squirmed in his seat some more, letting out another groan then clearing his throat. "Two people walking this way."

Die was getting close by the time Kyo told him someone was coming. "How close?" he asked, closing his eyes and then biting at his lower lip. Some part of him ached to just let it happen while he was right there, dying to have these strangers see his cock explode right there in his car. But the more rational side chided that they could know them... or he could have to pass them each day at work; or worse, they worked for them.

Kyo looked out the window again, judging the distance. "About six cars away, strolling along…not moving very fast."

Groaning softly, Die pulled his shirt up off his belly and then went after himself hard for a few seconds, his hips straining upward to the point that his cock was probably partly visible in the door's window. With a quiet inhale of breath, he lost it, cum spurting out over his stomach, his hips still arched just as much, at least some part of the scene probably visible to the passersby.

Kyo watched as the people came closer then abandoned them to pay attention to the way Die was straining upward. Everything about his lover at the moment was glorious, from the way his stomach muscles clenched to the soft inhale of breath just as he came. 

The vocalist very nearly groped himself, his hand stopping just millimeters above his cock before he groaned and pulled away. His eyes flicked to the window again, seeing the two passersby continuing on their way, though he was certain he saw the girl blushing faintly. "Jesus..."

Die eased himself down in his seat and made sure to throw his arm over his face so that perhaps if they were looked in on he wouldn't be recognized, and Kyo could maybe get off unscathed. He lay there catching his breath for a few minutes before finally letting his arm drop and letting out a rough sigh. "Fuck," he murmured.

Kyo was so hard at this point that it hurt, and he was having a hard time not just taking care of the problem then and there. "Fuck is right...," he groaned out, pushing his hips up.

Die decided to just go with what he was thinking rather than being cautious. If Kyo wanted to call their safe word on something he did, then he would. He studied Kyo's obvious boner for a moment and then smirked. "You're going to work with that, just how it is."

Kyo stared at Die with a good amount of ire in his eye. "You can't be serious..."

"Oh, but I am, darling." He reached into the center console and pulled out some tissues, wiping himself up real well and then shoving the used tissues into the trash bag on the back of Kyo's seat. He put himself away and eased his shirt back down before using some hand sanitizer and righting his chair to the proper driving position. "Do you hate me yet?"

Kyo watched Die clean up, biting his lip for a moment. He let out a snort and shook his head, looking down at his crotch. "Somewhat...but even more so if this is all you have planned..." He unbuckled and opened his car door, stepping out and tugging his shirt down to hide part of the bulge in his pants.

Die let out a laugh. "Oh, you only wish this was all I had planned." He pulled himself out of his seat and then picked up his coffee cup. "Bring the bag." It'd give Kyo a chance to hide his cock if he wanted, and it left his hands free.

Kyo huffed and reached into the back, getting the bags and positioning one in front of himself. He wasn't opposed to exhibitionism, but he also didn't want to start the day at the studio with his dick as the topic of conversation. Once he was done with that, he grabbed his trash and followed Die, his steps slightly awkward.

The guitarist wandered down the length of the row, stopping at the elevators and punching the button. It was quick to arrive, and they got on, managing to get up to their floor without incident or the elevator car stopping, which was an entirely new feeling for Die. Apparently being a few minutes early had its benefits... besides slight exhibitionism in the car.

Kyo followed Die onto the elevator and leaned against the wall, attempting to will his erection down some. He'd managed to at least get it to stop pressing against his pants so much by imagining a variety of things, including their manager's face. 

They started down the hallway toward the actual studio, and Die glanced at Kyo, a small smirk on his lips. "So did either of the people see me... and do we know them?"

Kyo shook his head. "I think the female saw; she was blushing. I didn't recognize her in the least, though."

Die chuckled. "Here's hoping she didn't know us." He opened the door to the studio and slipped inside, raising his cup. "Hello, hello!"

Kaoru glanced up from his computer, an eyebrow raised. "My, my... aren't we on time today?"

Kyo slid in behind Die, hovering there rather than stepping forward anymore. He gave a grunt and glared at the back of Die's head. "Only because he decided _I_ had to be up when he woke up..."

Die snorted a bit. "Mmmhmm." He glanced back at Kyo and then looked right at Kaoru as he pushed the door shut behind Kyo, shooing the vocalist toward the fridge and cupboards to put stuff away. "I have something to speak to you about."

Kaoru gave Die a questioning look and just nodded, watching the way Die sort of tried to get Kyo to leave for the time being... and the awkward way the vocalist was holding the bags.

Kyo looked at Die, his glare turning slightly darker before he moved towards the fridge on the other side of the room. He was unable to walk normally, and he was very conscious of every step he took. He got to the fridge and bent down to put stuff on their designated shelf, nearly letting out a groan as the plug shifted inside of him. He covered up with a cough though and continued on putting things away.

Die moved over to Kaoru and crouched down, studying the guitarist for a moment. "You're good with Toshiya... right? Like... ah..." he scratched his head, trying to find a better way to ask if Kaoru had successfully gotten past being an asshole.

Kaoru let out a soft laugh. "Yeah, we're fine... why?"

Die shrugged a little, making a small face. "Good. Well... ah... have you gotten into kink-land yet?"

Kaoru looked a little shocked and then, perhaps, a little embarrassed. "I don't see how this line of questions is going anywhere productive..."

Kyo finished putting their snacks away then turned to go set up his computer, frowning slightly when he saw Die and Kaoru having a discussion. He pursed his lips and sighed, looking around then going over to one of the sound boards and studying the settings, pretending to have a purpose.

Die, for the most part, ignored what Kyo was doing. Oh, he had his eye on him, but nothing more productive than that for the moment. "Well... fine, I'll just come out and say it. Kyo is my sub for the day. Are you familiar with the term?"

Kaoru looked vaguely horrified... and then, slowly, intrigued as he let the shock wear off. "You... Dom... him?" He looked perplexed. "Is that... ah... usual?"

Kyo just barely heard the word "sub" and his cheeks flushed darkly as he realized just what it was Die and Kaoru were discussing. He ran his hand over his face and sighed, standing there with his head hung down for a moment. Great, just great. Now their band leader was in on it and he was probably in for even more torture. Not that the thought didn't further excite him...he just wasn't so sure telling Kaoru, of all people, was a good idea.

“Actually..." Die glanced toward Kyo's corner, noting the look on his lover's face and vaguely reconsidering what his overall plan was for a moment, "I'm usually sub." He said the last part loud enough for Kyo to hear him. "Just... my idea and all... for this." It wasn't, really, but if it helped Kyo sleep better at night, then so be it.

Kaoru just vaguely nodded and then looked a bit more stoved up for a moment before muttering, "And this needs to be told to me... why, exactly?"

Kyo snorted to himself at the next thing that came out of Die's mouth. He gave up trying to find something to do on the other side of the studio and finally moved a bit closer to Die and Kaoru, taking his bag with him. He got started on setting up his computer then pulled his chair over and eased into it as slowly and carefully as he could.

"Because I wanted you to understand if there's some things I do today that seem... perhaps out of line with standard relationship practices. I didn't feel that doing some of what I had planned without explaining myself would be... wise." Die pulled himself up and shrugged a bit. "We could say I'm experimenting with this situation, and... I didn't want you thinking I'm being a dickwad."

Kaoru gave Die a look that clearly explained he was still very lost, but that he wasn't going to ask any questions. "Yeah... okay. Now I know. Can I stop knowing about your sex life now?"

Laughing, Die patted Kaoru on the shoulder. "Sure thing." With that, he headed back toward Kyo, a small smirk on his lips.

Kyo looked up at Die when he approached, eyebrow raised in silent question. He shifted faintly in his seat, and his breath hitched as the plug moved inside him just so.

Die settled across from Kyo, a satisfied look on his face as he studied the other. "Enjoying yourself?"

Kyo huffed out a breath, licking his lips after. "You could say that. What'd the boss man say about our little...game?"

"He would rather not know about our sex life." Die cracked a smile and shook his head. "But, now he knows some anyway." That statement was to judge Kyo's reaction.

Kyo nodded, shifting again, practically squirming in his seat now as he attempted to get the programs he needed up and running. "Ah..." He couldn't deny the fact that Kaoru knowing only served to ramp up his arousal, his pants growing tight once more.

Die didn't miss the other's discomfort, but he mentioned nothing about it. He simply sat there, arms draped over the back of the chair, leaning on it a bit as he gazed off seemingly past Kyo.

Kyo peered at his lover, wondering if asking to cum this early in the day would be worth whatever price Die would place on the act. He shook his head and glanced back at his laptop, clicking on a few things. His attempt to distract himself didn't work for long, however, and soon he was back to peering at Die, his hand rubbing over his thigh a few times.

Die could see every reaction Kyo had, and it amused him, though he showed none of it on his face whatsoever. Finally, he pushed himself up and went to get his guitar and everything else ready for the day. Once he had his laptop up and running, he wandered off to out in the corridor, debating on a drink for the day. Milk coffee, dark coffee, or one of the crazy sugar energy drinks.

Kyo continued to watched Die for a while before finally starting to work on the compiled lyrics he had sitting in front of him. He made a few notes then shifted a few things around before deciding he needed to piss. Plus it was a good way to rile Die up.

Standing, he made his way out in the hall where Die was, coming to stand beside him. "Need to piss," he murmured softly, standing in Die's personal space.

Die glanced at him and then arched an eyebrow. "With a hard dick?" He finally selected the milk coffee and inserted his money, pushing the button and watching the little arm grab the beverage and then deliver it to the slot, the door opening and providing him with it. He pulled it out and gently shook it before popping the top and taking a swig.

Kyo sighed and shrugged. "I'm not fully hard...though I will be if I wait much longer..."

Snorting, Die waved the other toward the bathroom. "Then go."

Kyo looked at Die for a moment, feeling nearly disappointed that the other didn't react in the least to his issue. He stood there for a moment then turned, heading for the bathroom to relieve himself.

Die watched Kyo go, turning back to go into the band room. He settled down at his station and put on his headphones, quietly starting to strum through some warmup chords, his mind wandering off to work for a few minutes.

Kyo took his time in the bathroom, pissing then going into a stall to shift the plug around some. He barely bit back a groan as he did, reducing it to a soft gasp instead. Once he was satisfied with the placement, he washed his hands and finally exited the restroom, going to the vending machine. He chose a cold jasmine tea, popping it open and sipping it before heading into the studio once more. Settling at his computer, he got to work on his tasks for the day, trying not to seem as distracted as he truly was.

Die glanced up when Kyo came in, eyeballing him to see if he'd cheated and jacked off or not. Once he was seated though, he looked uncomfortable enough that Die was satisfied that the answer was a good, solid no.

Hours slipped past before Die picked up his phone and texted Kyo, his back to him still since that's how their stations were set up. _Take your shirt off. Pretend you're hot._

Kyo had slipped into his usual zone of ignoring everyone, save for a rare reply on Skype about something the others asked of him. He jumped slightly when his phone vibrated in his pocket. He reached to get it, staring at the text before turning to look at Die. He fidgeted for a moment, glancing around the room to see both Toshiya and Shinya wearing hoodies, making his excuse somewhat implausible. 

He bit his lip and texted Die back, wondering if the other would persist with the request. _It's freezing in here..._

Die glanced at the text and quickly tapped out a reply. _Did I fucking stutter?_

Kyo stared at the reply he got and rolled his eyes. Looking around the room once more, he shifted forward and tugged his shirt over his head. He got an odd look from Toshiya and a raised eyebrow from Kaoru but other than that, neither of them said anything. 

It was Shinya that looked the most offended, his hands going to automatically rub his arms. Kyo gave the drummer a shrug then turned back to his work, trying to ignore the goosebumps popping out over his skin.

Die staunchly ignored any reaction the other was receiving, simply going about his business and continuing to work. A while later, when he was sure almost everyone was sufficiently distracted, he skype messaged Kyo so it wouldn't be nearly as obvious as the phone. _Unzip your pants._

The vocalist was just about to go get a bottle of water when Die's message came. He blinked at it for a few minutes then looked up, glancing around the room. Everyone was busy and focused on other things. 

He squirmed for a moment then finally reached down and did as Die had bidden, unzipping his pants slowly.

 _Did you do it?_ Die reached up to push his headphones down around his neck instead of over his ears so he could hear anything else that happened.

Kyo shifted back slightly, looking around again before pushing his hips up, clenching his teeth hard to hold in the groan he wanted to let out. _Yes, I did it._

He smirked slightly and turned on the webcam function, tilting his camera down enough for Die to see his pants gaping open.

Die smirked when the other showed him what he'd done, typing out, _Good; now take your cock out._

Kyo shifted the computer back up to read the next message. He had been expecting it, but it still made his eyes widen and a spike of heat go through him. _Are you serious?_

Die pushed himself out of his seat, leaving his laptop down enough to hide the webcam and walked past Kyo, breathing out a very, very quiet, "Do I look like I'm joking?"

The way Die spoke sent another shiver down Kyo's spine. He shook his head and shifted his chair forward, more under the table. After looking around once more, he finally reached down to pull his cock free of the confines of his pants, squeezing the base of before letting go. He felt exposed, nervous and incredibly aroused all at the same time. _Now what?_

Die rounded the room and went to get some new strings to look like he had a purpose. Coming back to sit down, he lifted his screen and settled in. _Think of all the things I've ever done to you with my mouth... think of them in great detail. The feeling of my mouth on your cock... your nipples... your asshole. How did it feel when I sucked on your balls?_

Kyo had attempted to go back to his work but then Die was sending him another message. This one was very nearly his undoing. The tiniest sound escaped him as he read Die's dirty words, lust going straight to his cock. _Fuck, Die. You know it felt amazing. All of it feels amazing._

He sent the message then sat there, thinking of exactly what Die had bid him to, his length hardening rapidly and his hand rubbing over his thigh. There was no way in the world to hide this from anyone that walked by at this point, and he wasn't really sure he cared.

Die just sat there, smirking to himself, watching Kyo's face for a few moments on the screen. Finally, he typed out, _Now touch yourself, and don't get caught. If you get caught, you'll pay._

Kyo had been anticipating Die's next command, and it was with very little hesitation that he reached down to wrap his fingers around his length. He bit his lip and began slowly stroking his aching cock, the sensation like heaven after having been teased for so long. He got lost in the pleasure of it for a few moments, forgetting himself and leaning back in the chair as he pushed his hips up slightly. 

It was at that moment that Toshiya happened to look up and spot what the vocalist was doing, his mouth dropping open in shock. He sat there for a moment, then leaned over and elbowed Kaoru, gesturing towards their exhibitionist of a vocalist.

Kaoru almost choked when Toshiya gestured toward him. After a moment, he pulled up Die on Skype and quickly typed out a message. _Your sub is ah... well... look._

Die didn't bother to turn around, instead typing back. _Oh-ho... caught he is. Payback's a bitch._

Kaoru gestured to Toshiya to look at the screen, his lips pursed slightly. Toshiya looked at the screen, blinking in confusion for a moment then getting it. He looked over at Die then back to Kyo before smirking. He glanced at Shinya but the drummer was completely focused on his screen, his hands tapping out a drum beat only he could hear. Shrugging, he looked at Kaoru, his eyebrows waggling a bit before he went back to ogling Kyo's display.

Die pushed himself up and made his way to Kyo's area, coming to stand in front of him, his arms crossed over his chest as he looked less than impressed at Kyo's little display. The instant he had any attention at all from the vocalist, he lashed out, slapping him square across the face and then leaning down to hiss in his ear, "Payback; you got caught, darling."

Kyo had managed to calm himself down somewhat, but he was still completely obliviously until he noticed Die standing in front of him. He opened his mouth to speak but soon found himself being slapped across the face, the force of it turning his head slightly. 

He jerked his head back and glared at Die as his cheek stung. He looked pissed, but there was no denying the way his cock positively _throbbed_ from the action. Not to mention the fact that Kaoru and Toshiya had both obviously seen that. 

"Am I supposed to be sorry?" he questioned, his tone snarky, his hand still on his cock.

Die's tongue slid over his ear, and then he breathed out a dark sort of chuckle. "You're supposed to grovel like a fuckin' bitch."

Kyo whimpered softly, finally releasing his cock. He shrugged slightly and looked up at Die, smirking slightly. "Are you just trying to get me on my knees?"

Die yanked hard on his hair at the smartass comment. "Bitch, I told you not to get caught, and you went and got yourself caught by two people, not even just one," die hissed out.

The vocalist groaned in pain, his head tilting to the side. He looked up at Toshiya and Kaoru again then back to Die, finally lowering his eyes. "I'm sorry, _Sir_. I couldn't help myself."

Die let go of his hair and patted him lightly. "Good. That's better. Drop the sir bit though; it tastes bad in my mouth." He leaned down and kissed him lightly. "Hmm... tastes bad in yours too. Try something else."

Kyo hummed, returning the kiss. "As you wish," he murmured, considering things he could call Die. "Master?"

Die bit his lip lightly and then shook his head. "Just drop the names all together. Still bitter." He straightened finally and gestured. "Well, since everyone's already seen it minus Mr. In-His-Own-World, just go ahead and finish.

Kaoru nearly choked on an inhale, staring down at his screen as he did his best to sort through emails and ignore what was going on for the sake of his relationship with Toshiya and not looking like a tool by staring. Not that he cared if the bassist stared or not; it really didn't bother him, but he figured it was better safe than sorry on his own part.

Kyo nodded then flushed faintly at the next request. He looked at Kaoru as the other made a sound then over to Toshiya who was still gaping at them as if they'd grown extra heads. He shifted back, looking up at Die then wrapping his hand around his cock once more. He began stroking himself, squirming in his seat, groaning as the plug shifted inside of him. 

Toshiya continued to watch for a few moments then finally tore his eyes away, focusing instead on his computer screen. He couldn't deny being affected by such a display, his own sweatpants tented slightly.

Die glanced at the others and then gave them a slight nod, turning away and walking back to his area. He settled down, his cock aching from watching Kyo do such things in public. The humiliation factor really did it for him, and he just hoped he wasn't pushing Kyo too far with any of this. But, then again, the vocalist knew his safe word and he'd yet to use it, so that was a plus.

Die wasn't the only one getting off from the humiliation. As much as Kyo knew he would be embarrassed later, having everyone watch him only served to push him faster towards the edge. The only thing that might have stopped him, had he seen it, was the judgmental look Shinya cast their way before standing up and walking out of the room. Fortunately, Kyo missed the drummer's actions, far too involved in stroking his cock at a pace built to get him off quickly.

It was somewhat fortunate that Die didn't notice Shinya's actions either. He was too busy leering at the video camera of what Kyo was doing to notice a single thing that Shinya - or anyone else for that matter - may have been up to. His own cock was hard, but he ignored it in favor of letting Kyo get some satisfaction out of what was going on. He'd just demand something for him later, and that would be that.

Kaoru glanced toward Toshiya and then back at Kyo and then shook his head a little, a smirk on his lips. Under his breath, he breathed out, "Okay, today is adventure day... bathroom in twenty?"

 

The vocalist finally hit the point of no return, a loud and rather obnoxious moan escaping him as he jerked his cock a few more times before finding his end. He jerked his hips up in the seat, panting harshly as spurt after spurt landed on his belly, the final one hitting the table in front of him. When he was spent, he eased out the last few drops then sunk back down in his seat, his head back and his eyes closed as he attempted to come down off of his orgasmic high.

Meanwhile, Toshiya had glanced back at the display, licking his lips when Kaoru spoke. "Gods, yes...if not sooner," he whispered back, shivering a bit at the thought and the way Kyo came. 

Kaoru stood up not long after, adjusting his cock in a rather obvious sort of way before he headed off to the bathroom, a small smirk on his face.

Die grabbed his own dick for a few moments before leaving it alone and then settling down, turning to glance at Kyo, a small smile on his lips.

Kyo opened his eyes when heard Kaoru's chair move. He glanced over at the leader, his lips spreading into a wide grin as he noticed the bulge there. He moved his eyes to his lover slash Master of the day and licked his lips, dropping his hand to run through the mess cooling on his stomach. 

Toshiya watched for another moment then stood as well, not bothering to adjust himself as he turned and followed Kaoru towards the bathroom, his look far too eager.

Standing up, Die moved over to Kyo, lightly caressing his cheek for a moment and then breathing out, "Such a good slut. Wait long enough for them to be fucking and then go in to remove your plug and clean up. Make sure they see you remove it."

Kyo nodded and leaned into Die's touch, shivering slightly. He shifted back in his seat and waited for several minutes, fairly certain the bassist and guitarist were going to make quick work of getting down to business. 

He stood and, being careful to keep his shirt out of the mess, made his way into the bathroom. He wasn't disappointed when he walked in, Kaoru having bent Toshiya over the sink and currently fucking him at an intense pace. 

They both looked up as he walked in but didn't stop their actions so he carried out Die's orders. He dropped his pants and eased the toy out in their full view, groaning as he did so. After that, he got some paper towels and cleaned his stomach and dick off then set to washing the plug thoroughly. 

Finally, he deemed himself clean enough and washed his hands, throwing the currently fucking couple a smirk before sauntering out back to the studio.

Die waited on Kyo to return and when he did, he gestured him over and pointed to his bag. "Plug in there... now details."

Kyo moved to Die's bag and stashed the plug in it before going to perch on Die's side of the table. "Kaoru is fucking Toshiya against the sinks hard enough that the entire counter was creaking. It appeared that Toshiya had cum already and was still hard, and both of them hardly noticed me."

Die chuckled. "Good. Mission accomplished there." He reached up to gently run his fingers over Kyo's short hair and then rested his hand on the other's thigh. "See Shinya anywhere?"

Kyo smirked a bit then glanced over to where the drummer had been sitting, only then noticing his absence. "Hmm...no I didn't. When did he leave?"

"No idea." Die shrugged and then settled, his fingers tapping out a rhythm on Kyo's thigh. "Well, since we're alone..." his eyes met Kyo's own, his fingers pausing, "You doing okay?"

Kyo hummed then reached down to settle his hand over Die's, grinning. "Fantastic...but it looks like you're a bit uncomfortable." He nodded to the sizeable bulge in Die's pants, eyeing it somewhat hungrily.

Die chuckled. "Come here, and sit on my lap. But be still."

Kyo was quick to slide onto Die's lap, smirking at him then putting on a nearly innocent look. "Can I have a kiss?" he questioned, a tone of submissiveness in his voice.

Die shifted Kyo around a bit and then reached up to frame the other's face, tugging him down enough to press his lips against Kyo's own, tongue slowly sliding over the seam. Kyo let out a pleased sound as Die's lips pressed against his. He brought his hands up to rest on the other's shoulders as he gradually parted his lips for Die's tongue. 

It was in this moment that their drummer returned, looking irritated but being quiet as he settled himself back at his computer, doing his best to ignore them now. He was quick to put his headphones on and look busy, warding off any questioning about where he'd been.

Die kissed him gently for quite some time before finally breaking off the kiss and settling on lightly rubbing Kyo's back, his nose tucked under Kyo's jaw just because he liked being there.

Kyo sighed happily, relaxing against Die. As much as he loved the scene they were playing, he adored affectionate moments like this, even if it didn't fit completely with the supposed harsh attitude Die was supposed to exhibit.

Die patted Kyo's hip and then murmured, "Back to work before liida has our heads."

The vocalist nodded, sliding off of Die's lap, the slightest pout on his face. He moved back to his computer and settled in to actually working on the song he'd had up for the most of the day. 

A few minutes later, Toshiya walked in with a cup of coffee and a smirk, taking his seat with a satisfied sigh. He shot a little wave to Shinya when the other looked up then winked towards Kyo and Die.

Die almost wanted to burst out laughing at Toshiya's pleased look. He waved back a bit and then absorbed himself in his work, putting his headphones on and pulling his acoustic into his lap.

Kaoru wasn't far behind Toshiya, though noticeably enough that it implied he'd gone out for a cigarette post-fuck.

Kyo chuckled lowly to himself when the other two members of their band returned, his tongue sliding over his lips as he pictured their activities from just a bit ago. He let that and the promise of more from Die carry him through the tedium of working out just how he wanted to place the lyrics with the melody.

It was hours before Die moved again, and when he did, he simply got up and went out into the hallway. Making his way down toward the vending machines, he went about purchasing water as he pulled up Boss as a contact and dialed the number.

"Hey," he murmured when the other man answered the phone.

 _"What's the occasion?"_ Boss sounded more than a bit amused on the other end of the line.

"Well... I have a bit of an odd request." Die lowered his voice and leaned against the wall, looking to ensure no one else was around. "You're interested in Kyo sexually, at least somewhat, right?"

There was a pause and then, _"Die... that's some dangerous question you're asking of a friend."_

Die let out a laugh. "It's not leading; I just... okay, to be blunt, I'm Domming him today, and I've been trying to think up things to have him do, and-"

 _"I'm on the list?"_ Boss cut him off, a low chuckle slipping through the telephone line.

"Ah... sort of. I was thinking I'd have him call you and..." Die looked around again, "Go all sex phone line worker on you. If you're okay with that..."

 _"I assume I'm allowed to actually enjoy this, and not just be tortured by it?"_ Boss sounded ever so faintly amused now.

"Well, duh." Die snored. "Like I'd have such a sexy fucker call you, and not let you get off on it. I'm not an asshole!"

 _"Just prone to asking large favors of your friends."_ There was a small pause and then a genuine laugh. _"Of course. His phone I assume?"_

"Mine. The next time a call is incoming from me, it's that. And I owe you one."

_"You don't owe me shit if I'm getting off to this. I may owe you two a favor... or three... after that."_

Someone started down the hallway from the elevator and Die cleared his throat. "So, I'll talk to you later." It was a sincere change in his voice that gave away more than he actually had to speak.

_"Later."_

With that, they hung up and Die traipsed back down the hallway and into the room. Plunking down in his seat, he crossed his legs and cracked open his water bottle, taking a good swig of it.

Kyo watched Die as he left, squirming a bit in his seat as he fought the urge to follow him. It had been a long time since they'd even spoken to each other, and he was getting antsy. He found himself wondering if waiting was part of the torture Die had planned for the day. When his lover returned, he looked at him intensely, unconsciously licking his lips as he watched the other's Adam's apple bob when he swallowed.

It was a good twenty minutes before Die finally finished up dilly-dallying with his water and then went back to work. Hours later, he emerged from his headphones, standing up to stretch, his fully-hardened cock quite obvious in his pants, though he paid it no mind whatsoever.

By the time Die moved again, Kyo was finished with his song and had started going through his emails and sending out Zemeckises tweets. Shinya had left already with barely a goodbye, so it was just the four of them now. 

With that in mind, he looked up at Die and let out a soft little sound when he noticed how hard his lover was. Biting his lip, he glanced up at his face and announced, "I have to piss."

Kaoru coughed from his corner and muttered something about lies before settling again, going back to dealing with whatever was on his screen.

Die glanced at Kyo, judging where he was at mentally and then picking up his messenger bag and slipping his phone into his pocket. He plodded toward the door, empty water bottle in hand. "Then hurry before we go home. Night, guys!" It was sort of his way of not telling about his fetish while still getting to leave and see Kyo do exactly what the vocalist had in mind.

Kyo smirked and quickly packed his bag, waving to Toshiya and Kaoru before hurrying out the door. Once he was in the hallway, he gave Die a lustful look. "I've been holding it for at least an hour. I was surprised you didn't see me squirming..."

Die glanced at him and then smirked a bit. "Intentional... now you get to hold it for as long as I say. Come on, we're leaving."

Kyo let out a slight huff, glancing towards the bathroom before finally following along with Die. "Cruel..."

"Only today, darling." Die stepped onto the elevator shortly after pushing the button and leaned against the wall.

Kyo hummed and stepped on the elevator, dancing around slightly as the car made its way downward.

"It's not that bad, c'mon now." Die laughed softly as he made his way off the elevator once it arrived at ground floor.

Kyo shot Die a look before he followed him off the elevator. "Mm, perhaps not, but I thought you'd enjoy the show..."

"I didn't say I wasn't enjoying it." A small smirk pulled at Die's lips as they walked along. Somewhat intentionally, he led them away from the building, ignoring everything else in favor of the walk they were currently having.

Kyo snorted and walked along, expecting to have gone to their car. However, Die led them away from the direction their car was in and down a different path, giving Kyo cause for confusion. Still, he walked along with him, figuring Die had a plan of some kind.

It took them nearly half an hour to get to a random apartment building, one that Die used to live in years ago. He keyed in the code on the doors, finding they hadn't changed it, and then held open the door for Kyo.

Kyo stared at the building they'd arrived at, faint recognition in his eyes. When Die keyed in the code, he cocked his head and stared at the other. "Why here?"

"You'll see." Die gestured him in. "Go."

Kyo pursed his lips and took a step forward before stepping just inside the door, still looking hesitant.

Die followed him in and then closed the door, wandering off down the dim hallway. "C'mon, I'm not ditching you here, if that's what you think."

Kyo shook his head, following Die. "That's not what I thought...," he fibbed, sticking close to his lover.

"Sure... whatever you say." Die reached his hand back, waving his fingers in an attempt to get Kyo to take his hand as they moved on down the hallway.

Kyo reached out and took Die's hand, holding it tightly as they walked. After a few minutes, he began to wonder if the hallway had an end, as they'd turned a few corners already and had yet to stop.

Die finally led them to an elevator and punched the button. It took a while to come down and when the doors slid open, it was rickety and loud. Stepping in, Die tugged Kyo along, and then hit the button for the top floor of the building. He was careful not to touch the walls in the least as the doors slid shut.

Kyo stared at the noisy elevator with some amount of apprehension in his eyes. If Die had not pulled him onto it, he wouldn't have gotten on it at all. He found himself pressed against Die as it creaked its way to the selected floor, a sense of unease settling over him. "Die....what the hell?"

Die let out a laugh and then gestured toward the ceiling. "No camera." He tugged Kyo against him and pushed himself right up flush with his ass. Leaning down, he murmured, "Now take a piss... cause you will not be the first."

Kyo flicked his eyes up then groaned as Die pressed against him. He shifted his ass back slightly the smirked. "Is that an _order_?"

Die's fingertips dug into Kyo's hips. "Do it."

Kyo had to piss too bad to resist Die anymore, as much as he wanted to push his lover to his limits. Instead, he reached down and unzipped his pants, freeing his cock. He gave it a few strokes then started pissing, aiming for the door and watching it splash down the metal surface.

Arousal surged through Die at a rate he wasn't entirely sure was legal. He moaned loudly as the other's piss splashed over the door, running down to make a puddle on the floor. His lips found Kyo's neck, one hand sliding down to lightly press at his lover's bladder. "Eight floors," he breathed out.

Kyo shuddered at Die's moan, pushing back against him more as he continued to piss. He let out a breathy moan of relief and arousal as he pissed while Die pressed his bladder. "I think I have enough for that...."

"I think you do, too." Die slid his fingers off Kyo's abdomen and reached out, lightly running his index and middle finger over Kyo's cock and then through the stream a few inches in front of his lover's dick, feeling the pressure of the warm spray.

When Die touched his cock, it jumped, making his spray change angles to hit the floor for a moment. He dropped his head back and groaned, pushing it out a bit harder over Die's hand, liking the way it felt.

"You know... I think I'm rubbing off on you, darling," Die murmured quietly, his hips grinding against the other's ass as his cock swelled within his pants once again.

Kyo moaned softly, bucking his hips slightly then settling as his spray began to wane some. He chuckled lowly, forcing himself to stop and turn his head up to look at Die. "Is that so?"

"Yes, it is. Now finish." Die lightly tapped the head of Kyo's cock with two wet fingers. "Three floors."

Kyo tried to resist but the way Die touched his cock was too much and the rest of his piss came spurting out. The stream was weaker but still he managed to hit the doors, shivering as he watched it pool on the floor.

"You're making such a mess... you dirty whore," Die breathed out before licking over the shell of Kyo's ear. He nipped the lobe and then lightly blew air over it. "One floor, better hurry, or they'll see you defiling the elevator."

Kyo whined at the way Die talked to him, his cock growing harder by the minute, making pissing difficult. He pushed it out harder, the last few drops leaking out just as the elevator dinged, signaling their arrival to the top floor. He groaned and shook off, attempting to tuck his cock away in his pants just in case someone was there.

The doors slid open and Die took a survey of the hallway. No one was there, though loud music could be heard from down the hallway. The whole floor smelled like weed, and he chuckled as he leaned over and hit the button for the first floor with his dry hand. Once the doors were closed, he held his wet fingers in front of Kyo's lips. "Suck the index."

Kyo sniffed the weed in the air and snorted, suddenly understanding why the elevator had no camera and appeared to be used as a toilet often. He shifted back slightly then peered at Die's soiled fingers before shaking his head. "Make me."

Die grabbed Kyo's jaw with his free hand, squeezing at just the right points to make him open up. Once he did, he pushed his index finger into his mouth and rubbed the pad of it over his tongue as he licked up over Kyo's cheek. "Fucker," he breathed out.

Kyo feigned struggle as Die squeezed his jaw and pushed his finger in but in reality, his cock was throbbing in his pants. He finally closed his lips around Die's digit, suckling it as he ran his tongue over it.

"That's right," Die murmured softly. "Now stop." He pulled his finger free and moved to suck the middle finger off himself, the taste of Kyo's salty piss sliding over his tongue. He didn't usually like the taste of it; it just wasn't his thing, but he knew it was sterile, and he could have given two fucks in the end if it gave him something more to humiliate Kyo with. 

Finally, he let go of his lover's jaw and then stepped back, unzipping and freeing his dick. He made quick work of starting to leave a puddle of his own, too tempted to pass up a good place to take a piss when presented with it.

Kyo released Die's finger when commanded, licking his lips afterward. The faint taste of his piss along with Die's skin worked to send shivers down his spine. When he heard Die pissing, he turned around to watch, his hand reaching out to touch his lover's cock. "I love it that you can't resist being dirty, too..."

"Did I tell you that you could touch?" Die grabbed Kyo's fingers and then smirked at him. "I could be so cruel to you."

Kyo looked into Die's eyes, desire for his lover to do just that burning there. "No, you didn't...."

Die stopped his stream for a moment and then pursed his lips. Finally, he breathed out, "Put my cock in your mouth. Crouch, don't kneel... don't want piss on your pants."

Kyo blinked at the command, it taking him a moment for what Die wanted to really sink in. Finally, he did as asked, crouching in front of the guitarist and taking his cock into his mouth, mentally preparing himself for what he knew was about to happen.

It took Die a few moments after Kyo had his dick in his mouth before he could force himself to finish what he'd started. Some part of him felt about equally as bad as the other part felt horribly aroused by it. He flexed slightly and then with a grunt, let out a stream of piss into the other's mouth, breathing out, "Swallow quick."

Kyo braced himself on Die's thighs as the other began pissing again, the first hot splash hitting his tongue making him nearly pull back. He didn't though and instead started swallowing as fast as he could, getting it down. He looked up at Die as he did, groaning and moving his tongue over the head of Die's cock, teasing him. Swallowing piss was definitely not his thing, but the arousal he saw in his lover's eyes made him enjoy every second of what he was doing.

Die only gave him a part of it before he pulled back, not eager to watch his lover choke on it or even really wanting to do what he did except as punishment in this situation. He stopped and motioned Kyo up. "Move."

Kyo blinked in surprise when Die pulled back and ordered him to move. He did as asked though and got back to his feet, licking his lips, tasting his lover's salty fluid still lingering there.

Once Kyo had moved, Die finished up in the corner and then zipped up and turned back around just in time for the elevator doors to open. This time there was someone standing there, a woman who looked incredibly out of it. She waited placidly until they had exited before she stepped in, already hiking up her skirt as the doors slid shut.

Laughing, Die took Kyo's hand and led him back down the hallway. "Okay, so maybe I have a few secrets left up my sleeve."

Kyo watched Die finish up then turned as the doors opened. He stepped off then watched the woman get on, seeing what she was about to do and snorting. "Indeed you do...how many times have you used that to satisfy your urges?"

"When I lived here... a lot." Die shot Kyo a deviant look. "I'd not go in the morning and then use the elevator. But only because everyone else was doing it first. There was like two months where the plumbing was broken and so everyone started using the elevator, and it just... never stopped."

Kyo smirked a bit as they walked, shaking his head. "Dirty...and I imagine oh so delicious for you..."

"Very." Die paused at the door, pushing it open and letting Kyo out first before stepping out and closing the door behind them. He turned to head back down the block toward the train station; they'd worry about the car later.

A chuckle left the vocalist as they walked, his hand finding Die's again. He stayed close to his lover, despite the people around them. Die felt a surge of pride that Kyo was holding his hand so publically. It was nice and there was no denying how pleasant it was. Kyo squeezed Die's fingers as they came into view of the train station. He was antsy for more of Die's antics, his cock semi-hard in his pants.

Once they'd swiped their passes and gotten on the train, Die eased himself down into one of the seats and fairly unabashedly tugged Kyo down onto his lap, doing his best to sort of seem like maybe he was a bit drunk just in case they needed an excuse. But, really, he wanted the other to feel is cock pressing up against him, the hard-on that had been plaguing him for far too long now.

Kyo let out a slight gasp as he was tugged into Die's lap, quickly picking up on the other's ruse as he squirmed around. Die's cock was hard, and he couldn't help grind against it, his body aching to be filled by it. 

Shifting slightly, he leaned back enough to murmur in Die's ear. "I want to feel your cock pounding my ass hard enough to make me scream."

Die let out a laugh and then coughed, his hips bucking slightly before he settled. He was so horny if they'd not had a public image to upkeep, he would have pulled Kyo's pants down and had him sit on his dick right there. But he knew better, no matter how difficult it was to not do it. Eventually, they got to their stop and Die tapped him so he'd get up.

Kyo spent the rest of the ride squirming around on Die's lap, laughing occasionally. When their stop came, he stood up, smirking at the tent Die's cock made in his pants. His own pants weren't exactly flat and he tugged his tank top down to help hide it as he made his way off the train.

Die put his bag in front of him as he walked, wandering out after Kyo and then heading for the stairs. He was intent to get in what he wanted to do, and he'd have to contain himself long enough for that to happen... or fuck Kyo first and then leave him wanting to do the phone call.

Kyo's steps were quick as he walked toward their home, barely noticing anyone around him. It wasn't long before they arrived at their home, Die pulling out his keys and unlocking the door. He pushed it open and then stepped inside, putting his bag away and then groaning as he leaned against the wall. Sure, it was breaking scene for a moment, but god did his dick ache. Reaching down, he rubbed at it, huffing out an excited breath as he did. "Untie my boots," he finally mumbled out.

Kyo eagerly stepped inside the house, watching Die as the other groped at himself. He groaned, then knelt, untying his lover's boots as commanded then stayed there, hungrily eyeing Die's cock.

There were a few minutes in which Die simply continued to grope at himself. After a bit, though, he finally stopped, stepping out of his boots and then gesturing Kyo toward the living room. "Don't turn on the lights in the living room; go get me three fingers of whiskey, and then come back to the living room and sit on the couch, center cushion."

Kyo's face turned to a pout as Die ordered him off to do his bidding. He got up and slipped out of his own shoes before going to the kitchen and getting Die's whiskey before returning to the living room and settled on the couch, though he chose the right cushion instead. A tiny act of defiance simply to rile Die up.

Die had his back to Kyo when he came into the room, his hands clasped at the small of his back while he stood there. He pursed his lips when he heard Kyo come back in, finally turning around to reveal that he'd taken off his belt and opened his pants.

He advanced on Kyo, holding out his hand for his drink. "I said center cushion," he spoke the words very carefully.

Kyo stared at Die's crotch for several seconds before handing him his drink. He gave an innocent look, fighting to hold his smirk back. "Oh? You did? I must've misunderstood...."

Die took his drink and then stepped back, pointing first at Kyo and then at the center cushion before he slammed back the whiskey all in one go.

Kyo considered staying where he was and did for several moments before finally shifting over to the center. He peered at Die, attempting _not_ to squirm.

Die settled in the chair across from Kyo and then shifted forward, holding his phone out toward Kyo. "Take it."

Kyo blinked then did as he was asked, taking the phone from Die.

"You are still under my control, correct?" Die's voice was very patient and dangerously quiet.

Kyo shivered at Die's tone, blinking at him before nodding. "I am still under your _complete_ control."

"You will be making a phone call; you will not know who is on the other end. I will input the number, and you will not look at the screen. They will only say the English word _yes_ and then you will begin a conversation with them as if you are a phone sex line worker. For the duration of the time that you start the call until they are satisfied, that _is_ your new job. Understood?"

Kyo stared at Die as he explained this new task and its rules. He was, admittedly, nervous about the idea of calling someone and doing this but he had to assume Die had set it up beforehand. He also couldn't deny the tug of arousal as he considered just how he would go about doing such a thing. "Understood."

Die held out his hand. "Phone."

Kyo handed over the phone and sat back, rubbing his hands over his thighs.

Die put in Boss' number from memory, knowing well it would key Kyo off if he didn't type in a number that it was someone he knew. But this way, it might not. He hit send and handed the phone back. "Do not look at the number; put the phone to your ear."

Kyo watched Die put the number in, anticipation making him squirm. He took the phone back when Die offered it and put it to his ear immediately, wondering who it was that was going to be on the other line.

Boss answered the line after a few moments, speaking only the word, "Yes?" and doing his best, as Die had instructed, to change his voice so that Kyo maybe wouldn't recognize it, though he was sure he'd fail through the rest of the call. But at least at first, it would be as Die had wanted.

Kyo swallowed when the voice on the other end spoke. He faltered for a moment then recovered, speaking in his best seductive voice. "Good evening, sir. I've been instructed to pleasure you. What name shall I call you by while I do so?"

"Just call me Z," Boss replied, settling down. He put his phone on speaker and quickly went about pulling up the message center on his computer and shooting Die a quick text. _I am supposed to enjoy this, right?_

Die got the text a few moments later and checked it, feeling greatly amused by the question. _Of course you are. I'm going to have him put it on speaker at some point, and I think I speak for both of us when I say we'd like to hear you cum._ He sent the rather lewd text back and then leaned back in his seat, easing his jeans down to free his cock before crossing one slim leg over the other and then lightly fondling himself.

Kyo licked his lips and shifted. "Alright, Z, what can I do for you tonight?"

Boss almost choked on the way the other asked him the question. He wet his lips lightly and then breathed out, "I'm ridiculously horny tonight; make me feel like you're here.”

Kyo chuckled softly, shifting back on the seat leaning back. "Mmm, I can do that. First of all, I want you to take off your shirt for me; let me see your sexy abs."

Die almost snorted at the way Kyo was going about this, but he kept it to himself, settling back and lightly stroking over the tip of his cock.

Boss chuckled. "Sure, we'll go with sexy." He took off his shirt though, just as he was asked, and then debated it. " _He_ said you were subbing tonight; is that true?"

Kyo glanced towards Die then focused back on the phone. "Yes, that is correct. He _owns_ me, tonight. I will obey His every command."

"I see." Boss shifted the phone to his thigh and picked up his pack of cigarettes, tapping one out and then lighting it. Once he'd taken a few good puffs, he offered, "Find some lubricant."

Kyo listened to "Z" lighted up a cigarette, a reflexive shudder going through him as he imagined Die's lips around one and the taste of his tobacco. Clearing his throat, he looked up at Die and mouthed the word "lube." "As you wish; I'm searching for some now."

Die stood up and went to get some. Coming back, he leaned over and took the phone from Kyo, putting it on speaker phone and then placing the phone behind his head on the back of the couch. Leaning in, he breathed against Kyo's ear, "Make sure he can hear you still." With that, he handed the lube over and pulled back.

Kyo waited for Die to retrieve the lube, looking up at him as he took the phone and put it on speaker. He gave a nod as Die spoke, unable to stop the shiver that went down his spine. "I have the lube, Z. Can you hear me?"

"I can," Boss replied. "Are you clothed?"

Die plopped down on the seat across from Kyo, watching him with attentive eyes.

Kyo shifted a bit and licked his lips, hoping the sound carried over the phone. "I am. Would you care for me to not be?"

"Remove your clothing," Boss returned to him. "And then tell me a little about yourself."

Kyo glanced at Die for a moment then stood stripping off his shirt and pushing his pants and boxers down. Once he was nude, he settled once more on the couch. "Well, I'm completely nude now. I have tattoos. I'm short but toned, and....my cock is sizeable with a piercing in the tip."

"Mmm, I adore tattoos," Boss returned, finally giving in and closing his eyes, leaning back and unzipping his pants. Some part of him was still nervous over this, but the rest of him was horribly turned on by the idea of getting Kyo to himself like this.

Kyo ran a hand over the tiger adorning his stomach, following the tail downward then stopping. "Do you? I have full sleeves, full back, one on my stomach and one my leg as well as my neck. I _love_ having people lick that one...it turns me on so much."

Boss actually moaned at that, unable to help himself. His fingers slid into his boxer briefs, grasping his cock. "I'm already hard just thinking about doing this with you..." he admitted quietly.

Kyo smirked, glad to be getting somewhere with this endeavor. "Is that so? Tell me about yourself. I want a good image while I imagine letting you lick my tattoos."

"I'm tanned... long black hair. I have a few tattoos: one only a few people have seen. And I don’t mind saying my cock is a work of art, particularly since it is currently very, very hard."

Kyo licked his lips and chuckled lowly. "Mm, you sound incredibly sexy. I have a fondness for tanned skin and tattoos, as well as an appreciation for art. Especially art I can wrap my lips around."

Die shivered at Kyo's bluntness, imagining him doing just that to Boss' cock and then groaning, utterly refusing to hold it back.

Boss didn't comment on it, instead, murmuring, "Use that lube; get some on your hand and start jacking off so I can hear you."

Kyo's eyes flicked to Die's face, pleased to see the lust there. He grabbed the lube and squirted some on his hand, wrapping his slick fingers around his cock. With a throaty moan, he began jacking off. "Hng, Z, it feels so good. It'd feel better if it was your hand...or mouth."

"Fuck," Boss breathed out, "I can hear you..." he reached to stroke over his dick as well. "I'm imagining how you... ah," he had to pause to not give himself away, continuing a moment later, "would look."

Kyo listened to the other man's voice, moaning at the excitement in it. "Mmm, just imagine my hard cock, sliding through my slick fingers, the lube glistening on my spiked piercing." He sped up his strokes for a moment, grunting lowly.

"Oh sweet..." Boss groaned loudly and then put out his cigarette, reaching for his own lube. Pouring some over his cock, he breathed out, "Tell me how you'd want me? What position? How hard?"

Kyo heard "Z" open his lube and imagined it pouring over his dick. He smirked and leaning back, pushing his cock up into his hand for a moment, letting out a moan. "Bent over the back of your couch, your nice hard cock buried deep in my ass as you fuck me _hard_. No holding back; just fuck me so hard I can't walk the next day."

"Oh god, Keeaaaa~" Boss nearly moaned out the other's name, catching himself and attempting to turn it into a very odd sort of moan instead.

Die snorted on a laugh, attempting to cover it with a cough as he recognized it for what it had nearly been.

Kyo blinked at the odd moan, breathing out a soft laugh before murmuring, "It's okay...I assume you already know my name...let me hear you moan it."

Boss let out a quiet chuckle and then murmured, "I do... I know you quite well, actually, darling Kyo."

Die cracked a grin, shifting to spread his legs and give Kyo an eyeful of his still very hard cock.

Kyo licked his lips, trying to put a face to the voice. One came to mind but he wasn't entirely sure so he kept quiet. Instead, he focused on Die's hard cock, his hand moving over his own slightly faster. "Mmm, then you know exactly what I look like...now imagine me bent over for you, your cock pushing into my tight hole." He paused for a moment, dropping his hand to cup his balls. "He's watching; his cock is so hard it looks painful. You two could double team me. I could suck his cock while you fuck me. I bet you'd both like that..."

Die and Boss moaned nearly simultaneously. Boss started going after himself faster, moaning out Kyo's name after a good minute of going after himself. "I want to feel you against me, to hold you cock in my hand as I fuck you until you scream."

The vocalist spread his legs and bucking up into his hand, a wanton moan leaving his lips. "Oh fuck yes. I'd scream so loud for you." He was quiet for a moment, panting as he stroked his cock finally forcing himself to slow down for fear of cumming. "I want to feel you cum inside my ass; fill me up with everything you've got."

That was about all it took before Boss just couldn't stand another moment of it. Kyo's voice and the lewd words, plus the slick sound of his hand on his cock were his undoing. Bucking up into his hand a few more times, he threw his head back, and then let out a strangled moan as he began to cum, barely breathing out, "I-I'm..."

Kyo shuddered as he listened to other man reach his end. "Gods," he breathed out, "So much of it...filling me up..." He stroked his cock, his eyes closed as he imagined the scenario.

Panting, Boss eased himself down from his orgasm, breathing out a soft laugh. "How about you tell him anytime he decides this is how he wants to Dom you, I'm game. I haven't cum like that since... well... a while."

Die let out a laugh. "I can hear you, and yes."

Kyo chuckled, flicking his eyes to Die. "Anytime, Z....anytime. Maybe next time, I'll know who you really are."

Boss was quiet for a moment and then breathed out, "Cum for me."

Kyo licked his lips and looked at Die. "As long as He says I may...then I'd be more than glad to."

Die chuckled. "Go ahead," he murmured. "I'd like to see you cum for him. Maybe... he'll be nice enough to tell you who he is... maybe not." He got up and came to kneel in front of Kyo. "But when you cum, it's all over yourself."

Kyo smirked then leaned back, going after his cock hard and fast. His breaths came in pants as he bucked his hips up, close to losing it. 

It took only a few more moments before he announced, "I'm cumming," then let out a stage-worthy scream as he began cumming, painting his stomach and thighs with his release. "Oh _fuck_!"

Boss couldn't help himself the moment that Kyo started to go after himself so furiously. His hand slid back over his own cock, stroking as he listened to Kyo. When the other came, he breathed out his name once again, closing his eyes, and he remembered the way Kyo had been when they'd been together. "Who do you think I am, Kyo?" he whispered softly.

Die ran his hand over Kyo's abdomen, collecting some of his cum, licking it off his fingers.

Kyo shivered at the way "Z" breathed out his name, loving the way it sounded spoken with such lust and desire. 

He opened his eyes and peered at Die, licking his lips as he considered the question. "Z....Zenji?"

Boss gave a soft huff of breath and then, "Now moan it for me. Just so I can hear it once again, darling."

Kyo grinned widely, another surge of arousal going through him. He dropped his hand to his cock, giving it a squeeze and a stroke as he did just as Boss asked. " _Zenji_..."

"Does it turn you on more, knowing who it is?"

Kyo considered that for a moment and chuckled. "As long as it's someone as sexy as you, then yes. Though, the mystery of it all did add to it..."

Die shifted up to lick the head of Kyo's cock for half a second before standing up and reaching to get the phone. "He needs to go," he murmured quietly. "Because I need to fucking cum." He chuckled. "We will talk tomorrow?"

"Yeah, of course. And Kyo... thank you."

Kyo groaned at the lick to his cock then grinned. "You're very welcome, Boss. Talk to you soon."

Die disconnected the call and tossed the phone onto the couch. "On your knees. I want you to suck my cock."

The vocalist was all too eager to comply, sliding to his knees in front of Die. "Yes, please, let me suck your glorious, hard cock."

"Well, it's in front of you. What are you waiting for?" Die demanded, giving Kyo a hard look.

Kyo's lowered his eyes before reaching up to grasp the base of Die's cock to steady it then leaning forward to wrap his lips around the tip. He lapped at the drop of pre-cum that had formed there, dipping his tongue into the slit. Finally, he stared moving down the length of it, not stopping until his nose was at the base. He flicked his eyes back up, starting to bob his head, groaning around it.

Die groaned the moment the other had him in his mouth, his hips bucking forward eagerly. He didn't hold back at all, fucking his mouth and whimpering nearly desperately. "Suck me hard, baby. Feels so fucking good."

Kyo brought his hands up to rest on Die's thighs as he repeatedly took his cock all the way to the hilt, his cheeks hollowing out as he sucked. It didn't take long for the first orgasm to wrack Die's body. He held Kyo's head in place as he lost it, shooting down his throat with a loud moan. Kyo let out a surprised sound at how quickly Die had cum but recovered and began swallowing everything his lover gave him, his nails digging into his skin slightly. "Mmm!"

Once he had finished, Die pulled out of his mouth and motioned to him. "Get on the couch, ass toward me."

Kyo licked his lips once Die pulled out, peering up at him. He didn't move though, a defiant look settling on his face instead. "I don't want to do it on the couch," he stated, his eyes challenging Die to retaliate.

Die reached down, ghosting his hand over the other's neck and then moving around, grasping the back of it and hardening his gaze. "Get on the fucking couch."

Kyo looked up at Die, licking his lips. "No."

Die's eyes narrowed a fraction before he let go of Kyo's neck and took a step back. His chin rose and for a moment, he looked like he might capitulate to the other's whims. But a second later, he lashed out, backhanding Kyo hard enough to actually hurt, but hopefully not bruise. "Do as I say," he spit out, the words dripping with venom. Even as he acted, a surge of arousal plunged through him that he wasn't entirely sure he could hide on the outside, this part driving him absolutely crazy every time they were brought to this point.

Kyo had expected retaliation and was far from disappointed as Die's hand connected with his cheek. The stinging pain of it, as well as the fire burning in his lover's eyes, made his blood boil. He could barely stop himself from groaning and instead tilted his chin up a fraction. He wondered if he was going too far but gods did he want to see what happened when he pushed Die. "Make me."

Normally Die would never have let himself come to this place, this dark and bizarre area in his mind. But this wasn't normal; this was something else entirely, and he found himself completely unwilling to stow away the pieces of himself that society usually deemed horrible and violent. Once upon a time in his youth, he'd gotten in a fist fight with a kid who had been bullying him and nearly put him in the hospital; that if nothing else had shone the light upon the violent streak somewhere inside of him. But it was usually tucked away in a neat little box, wrapped beneath a million layers of more positive emotions. Regulating it was a time-honored tradition in the Andou household... but this... this was something entirely different. It was a vent for every piece of that, just a small leak in the ever growing package, soon to be plugged back up and tucked neatly away on the shelves of his mind.

Taking a deep breath, Die took another step closer to his lover, dark eyes studying Kyo's own for a few long moments. His fingers slid over Kyo's lower lip, teasing the slightly puffed up tier before his fingers instead grasped Kyo by the throat, fingertips digging in as he backed the other up against the couch. "You are under my control and you _will_ do as I say.'

Kyo watched the change come over Die's face and felt the tiniest flicker of fear when the other began moving toward him. He'd seen this side of his lover only a handful of times, and it both excited and scared him to see it directed towards him. When those long fingers closed around his throat, his cock throbbed even as he fought to swallow. He put up a slight struggle, grasping at Die's hand as he was pushed against the couch. He forced out a strangled whimper, looking for all the world like his was cowed, even as his body burned with the desire for it all.

Die studied the other for as long as he felt he could draw it out without losing Kyo's piqued interest in the situation. Finally, he dipped his head down and began to lightly kiss Kyo, the act somehow both gentle and incredibly lewd. It was a kiss meant to force, to coerce, rather than one built to show his affection, and he couldn't stop the slight pang of guilt that slid through him even as he initiated it. But they'd had this talk multiple times. Kyo wanted to be forced, wanted to have Die be heavy handed with him... and it wasn't rape because Kyo had expressed his prior desire for it and hadn't called his safe word. 

Moving forward on that thought alone, Die shoved Kyo back onto the couch and followed him down, nudging himself between Kyo's legs, his lips finding Kyo's own once again.

Kyo groaned as Die kissed him, recognizing the act for what it was rather than a sign of affection. He moved his hand to grip Die's bicep, his nails digging in somewhat as he squirmed. When he was pushed back onto the couch, he let out a gasp but was quick to settle and part his legs for Die.

Die picked up the lube, quick to pour some of it over his still-hard cock before he shifted Kyo, still not letting go of his throat in the process, or even stopping the kiss. He steadied his dick and shifted until he found where he was supposed to be, holding himself steady as he pressed the head against Kyo's asshole. Finally, his lips slid over Kyo's cheek, leaving a trail of saliva behind. He breathed out in his ear, "I'm going to fuck you, and you're going to enjoy it." A moment later, he thrust forward, sinking into Kyo with one long push.

Kyo's excitement ramped up as Die readied himself. He was almost surprised the other even bothered with lube but didn't mind in the least. He groaned as he felt Die's cock against his asshole, his body aching to be filled. He shivered at Die's words, wanting to respond but instead settled for clenching his biceps, attempting not to squirm. When Die pushed into him, he let out a strangled cry, faint pain and delicious pleasure coursing through him.

"I will make you mine again," Die breathed out, allowing the ugly head of jealousy to rear its head in light of the current situation. "Too many people have tainted you today." His hand tightened on Kyo's neck as he licked over the shell of his ear, his hips snapping harshly against Kyo's body, pleasure coursing through him as he fucked the vocalist more harshly than he usually dared.

If Die's hand hadn't been around his throat, Kyo would have smiled at his lover's words. He somehow loved the idea of Die being jealous and re-claiming him. He shifted and squirmed against the hand around his throat though his hips were bucking upward against the harsh thrusts of Die's. "Hnng!"

Finally, Die pulled out, abruptly tossing Kyo onto his side and then pushing one foot onto the couch as he forced Kyo to roll over onto his stomach. He grabbed his hips and pulled that perfect ass up into the air, settling right behind him and plunging his cock back into his body with a groan. There was no time for adjusting, just him thrusting as furiously as he could, hips snapping, his head thrown back in pure bliss as he plundered Kyo's depths.

Kyo had just settled into Die's rhythm when the other pulled out and tossed him over. He let out a grunt then shifted with Die's tugging, making sure his ass was in the air. When Die pushed back in, he cried out quite loudly, his back arching. "YES! Yes, Die! Fuck me! Claim me!!"

Die moved closer to the other, nearly straddling him from behind as he began to hump him, outright rutting against his ass in a way that clearly showed the level of his desperation. He was horny beyond all rational belief, and he desperately wanted to fill Kyo's asshole with his cum. Straining, he hunched over Kyo's body, his hands on his hips tight in a way that meant he'd probably be bruised later. 

"Take it," he muttered out under his breath, "take my fucking cock. I'm fucking your asshole, and you're enjoying it, you little slut. Look at your cock... so fucking hard." His fingertips curled and dragged down over the skin of his lover's ass, leaving welts behind. "You like to be forced, don't you, whore?"

Kyo clung to the couch cushion in front of him, Die's thrusts pushing him almost against the arm of the couch. The dirty words spewing from his lover's mouth only served to turn him on further, his cock heavy and hard between his legs. 

"Oh fuck.. _yes_! Pound my whore ass!"

Closing his eyes, Die allowed his mind to follow the dark path they were exploring, letting it ride valiantly on ahead for him. Within the minute, he was losing it, his humping becoming erratic as he thrust in and then finally stilled, biting his lower lip as he began to spurt into the other's body. His hips jerked a few times as he breathed out, "You like this?"

Kyo's breath came in heavy pants as Die fucked him, every other thrust hitting his prostate, making him groan. When Die stilled, and he felt the other cumming inside his ass, he moan, flexing his inner walls, his own cock twitching. "Fuck yes, I like it. I love feeling your cum fill my ass up."

Die pulled out, sliding back and reaching for his whiskey glass from earlier without Kyo noticing. Parting the other's cheeks, he pressed the glass against his own knees to hold it still, moving until it was under Kyo just a bit. "Push it back out," he commanded, his voice oddly steady despite just having cum.

Kyo whined when Die pulled out then sat there, wondering what the other was doing until he felt the glass pressed against his ass. At the command, he bit his lip and pushed, feeling the cum slide out of his ass, a shiver going down his spine.

Die watched the cum dripping back out of Kyo's ass and into the glass, mixing with the bare remnants of whiskey in the tumbler. He slid the rim over his lover's asshole before putting the glass down on the couch between cushions, pushing the tip of Kyo's cock over the edge so it was pointed inside the cup.

Spreading his cheeks again, he leaned down and began to tongue over his asshole, knowing it would drive Kyo crazy and hoping he'd push him over the edge without jerking him off. Part of him just wanted to see the other's unattended cock shoot into the glass.

Kyo groaned as the rest of Die's cum slipped out of his body, his asshole twitching when the glass ran over it. He glanced down at the mix of whiskey and cum, finding it intriguing. His attention was pulled away from it quickly as soon as Die's tongue touched him. "Oooh, fuck! Oh gods!"

Die didn't let up in the least, fucking the other with the tip of his tongue and then just lapping over his asshole. He was more than determined to have Kyo cum from this.

Kyo was so close to the edge that Die's tongue had his cock twitching. "So close...Die..."

Spreading his cheeks with his hands, Die lapped harshly at his tight hole, spearing his tongue in a few times as he squeezed his ass perhaps harsher than was really necessary. 

The last couple of licks were Kyo's undoing. He cried out loudly, his cock spurting into the glass, nearly filling it up. "Fuck!!"

Die groaned at Kyo's release, pulling back to watch him lose it. "That's right," he breathed out quietly. "Just like that."

Kyo shuddered, shifting slightly to make sure he got it all in the glass then slumped down slightly, his body trembling.

Die carefully wiped Kyo's dick on the glass rim and then picked up the glass, moving to kneel next to Kyo, reaching down to grasp his jaw. "Open up."

Kyo shivered then looked at Die, biting his lip for a moment before doing as commanded, his lips parting. He eyed the mix of their cum, wondering just how it would taste.

Die tipped the glass against Kyo's lips, watching as the cum slid down the side of the glass and into Kyo's mouth. "Drink it all down."

Kyo shifted and started swallowing the mixture, finding it not unpleasant. Their flavors mixed together with the whiskey made an interesting cocktail, and he soon had it all swallowed, letting out a soft moan afterward.

Die pulled the glass back and slid his finger around the inside, gathering the rest and holding his finger out to Kyo. Kyo leaned forward and took Die's finger between his lips, sucking it for a moment. Then, he flicked hooded eyes up to Die's face as he swirled his tongue around the digit.

Once it was clean, Die pulled his finger out of Kyo's mouth and then moved to sink to the floor next to the couch with a groan. His cock was still hard, and he honestly couldn't fathom why other than he fact that he'd denied himself so long. But he was intent to ignore it in favor of ending the scene on a positive note. Reaching for Kyo's hand, he lightly grasped it and murmured, "Scene?"

Once Die had sat down, Kyo shifted closer to the edge of the couch, smiling softly as he squeezed Die's hand. "Mmhmm. Scene." He leaned down and pressed his face against Die's neck, despite the awkward angle. "You're still hard..."

"I know..." Die shifted some and then tugged Kyo toward him. "Come here... straddle me?"

Kyo hummed and made his way off of the couch, crawling over to straddle Die's lap. He pushed his face against his lover's neck and gave a content sigh, his eyes sliding shut.

Die pulled Kyo close to him. He'd honestly wanted to just rub against Kyo for a while until he came again, loving on him while he did it. But once his lover was in his arms, he thought better of it. He'd read a few things that it was best to keep sex out of the aftercare, and he had to respect that after such a harsh scene. This time, there were no apologies for what he'd done, only his hands lightly caressing the other.

The vocalist was loathe to admit weakness, but he honestly needed the gentle caresses his lover was giving him. As much as he'd loved how the entire day went, it was still emotionally draining in some way. He shifted and wrapped his arms around Die, clinging to him a little too tightly.

"Is there anything you want to change or not do again?" Die asked quietly, his hand stroking over the back of Kyo's head while they spoke.

Kyo considered it for a moment then shrugged slightly. "Nothing that I can presently think of. The phone sex thing can happen again, though."

Die laughed. "I'm pretty sure poor Boss is somewhere over there jacking off again thinking about that one." He kissed Kyo's cheek lightly. "He texted me asking if he was allowed to enjoy it."

Kyo chuckled softly, shaking his head then leaning back to peer into Die's eyes. "Did you allow him to enjoy it?"

"Of course I did!" Die ran his hand over Kyos hair lightly. "It'd be cruel not to."

Kyo laughed again then leaned forward, pressing his lips to Die's as he pushed his hands up into the other's hair. Die kissed him back softly for a few moments, pulling back before it went straight to his dick though. He pressed a few kisses to Kyo's jaw and cheek, still lightly rubbing over Kyo's body. "Favorite part?"

Kyo relished the kisses then smiled, reaching up to rub his slightly burning cheek. "When you slapped me in front of the others. The looks on their faces, the pain and the humiliation combined...and just now, when you forced me..."

Die flushed a little at the mention of the last part. "Yeah.... I sort of... enjoyed that more than I should have."

Kyo hummed and reached up, cupping Die's face. "I enjoyed it a great bit...and still found myself wanting more." He leaned in again to push his face against Die's neck, pressing a kiss to the skin there. "What about you? What did you like doing the best?"

Die squirmed a little. "The elevator and making you do that... tied with everything from where I backhanded you forward."

Kyo licked his lips and grinned. "I love indulging you with your fetishes. The way it gets you off gets me off." He shifted a bit in Die's lap, brushing over his length.

The moment Kyo moved, Die's hands were on his hips, settling him as he attempted to get his breath back and his mind out of the gutter. "So nothing that really bothered you?" Die reached to lightly run his thumb over Kyo's lips. "I was a little concerned about the punishment level of what I did with... ah... you know."

Kyo had to smirk at the way Die griped his hips. He admittedly wanted to take it to that level again but for now, he settled for licking the tip of Die's thumb. "That was...a very good punishment, I'll put it that way. I'm not complaining, though. I _crave_ that sort of thing...being punished."

Die nodded, lightly pushing his moistened thumb against Kyo's nose before settling and closing his eyes. "I'm greatly amused we ended up technically getting three people off around us today."

The vocalist chuckled and nodded. "Me, too. I was also greatly surprised Kaoru didn't pitch a bitch about our...activities."

"That's why I talked to him. He's getting more laid back. I think most of his anger was just pent up frustration and lying to himself."

"It would seem so," Kyo responded before shifting forward and pushing his face underneath Die's jaw, licking and kissing the skin there. "I know I should be satiated after today, but...I still want to feel you within me," he confessed quietly.

Die groaned at the confession, settling back and tugging Kyo forward. "Come here and sit on my cock then... I'm still aching."

Kyo licked his lips and shifted forward, reaching behind him to grasp Die's cock. He positioned it then eased himself down onto it, groaning softly as he sunk down. Once he was in place, he gave a shiver and started rocking ever so slowly.

Die sort of melted back against the couch, his eyelids falling closed as he relaxed there. Having Kyo in control made all the difference in the world to him for this session.

Kyo took his time, gradually picking up the pace as he rocked on Die's cock. He reached out to slide his hands over his lover's chest, toying with his nipples then raking his nails over his sides. After a while, he leaned in to capture Die's lips in a deep kiss, connecting them in yet another way.

Die kissed his lover back sweetly, everything about this union incredibly different to what had happened before. His hips rose slightly as Kyo moved on him, a small huff of breath leaving him as he broke the kiss, his head falling back. The most quiet and eloquent of moans slid free from his throat in those next few moments.

Kyo watched Die's Adam's Apple bob as the other gave a beautiful moan. He leaned in to press his lips to the spot then buried his face against the side of Die's neck, clinging to him as they moved together.

Die moved his hand to the back of the other's head, holding him in place. "Suck on it, baby," he breathed out.

Kyo was quick to part his lips, running his tongue over Die's skin then sucking the spot as requested. He hesitated for a moment then sucked harder, intent on marking his lover's skin, uncaring of repercussions.

Die let out a quiet whimper at the amount of suction the other was providing. He released Kyo's head and then slid his hand down over the other's back as his hips thrust up a few times a bit more harshly.

The vocalist gave his own sound of approval as Die thrust up into him. He responded by raking his teeth over the already bruised skin, his hips rocking harder. Finally, he pulled back to look at Die, licking his lips. "You fill me with pleasure over and over again, and I will never get enough, Daisuke."

Die lifted his head to meet Kyo's eyes as he whispered softly, "Never." The word was followed by a gasp and a final push of his hips as he fell over the edge.

Kyo smiled softly at Die's words before shuddering as he felt his lover filling him. He reached between them in that moment and wrapped his hand around his length, stroking himself a few times before following Die over the edge.

Die cradled Kyo close to him, easing them both down onto the floor. He closed his eyes and then murmured a quiet, "Just... stay here... tonight."

Kyo groaned softly, nodding his consent as they settled on the floor. He shifted just slightly the pushed his face against Die's chest. "My Koi...thank you..."


	79. Chapter 79

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Die had been more than a little bit riled up over the past few weeks. Kyo had been super busy with Sukekiyo business, and with all of their running around, Die found himself turning back to some very old habits. At least it wasn't alcohol, he realized with some relief. Though he was almost certain it was more dangerous in many ways.

After a long day at work recording some final touches, Die came home and plopped down on the couch where he sat for roughly two hours before realizing he wasn't going to see Kyo until the next morning given their current schedules. With a sigh, he finished up the last of the dinner he'd brought home with him and then stood up, finally giving in to what he wanted to do. He threw away his trash and fed the pets before wandering off upstairs. He grabbed his laptop and went to the bathroom. 

Settling the laptop down on the floor, he let it boot up as he began removing all of his clothing. Sighing softly, he settled down on the floor, entered his password, and then opened the browser. From one of his more hidden folders, he pulled up a URL and entered his username and password there, sitting back as it began to load the new screen.

He quickly put some concealer over his tattoo. After a bit, the little blue light next to his webcam came on. He adjusted it so it was showing only from the waist downward. The left side of the screen quickly filled with people viewing his cam session, eight and quickly climbing. He gave a little wave when someone told him hello and then sat back, starting to stroke his cock with his non-tattooed hand.

Every once in a while someone would ask something, and he'd lean in to type instead of simply stroking himself. But for the most part, this was just a show for the viewers, catering to their whim. They said “touch your nipples”, and he'd do it; they said “shove two fingers up your asshole”, and he'd do it.

 

Kyo was more than thrilled that things with Sukekiyo were going so well, even though it kept him from his soon-to-be husband. He found himself contemplating that the time apart may actually be a good thing. It gave them both a chance to breathe. Plus, it fueled the steadily burning fire they held for each other so that lately, every quick fuck or lovemaking session seemed more intense. 

The vocalist had finally finished up his tasks for the day, the clock reading 1am as he shouldered his bag and slipped out of the studio. He was tired, but something Uta had shown him earlier had him aching to slip between Die's legs and find relief. He wondered how ticked off his lover would be if he woke him up just to fuck him. 

He let that thought sustain him as he hailed a cab and gave the driver his address. He half considered texting Die, but figured the other was asleep already and decided against it. Instead, he entertained himself with imagining various things he'd like to do with the guitarist, having him suck his dick being at the forefront. 

By the time the taxi arrived at their place, he was fairly worked up and hurriedly paid the driver before bolting for the door. He let himself in and reset the alarm, looking around to see the empty living room as he'd expected. He debated for a moment then headed upstairs, intent on a shower and some quality time with his hand. 

However, the sight that greeted him upon entry to the bathroom put everything on hold. Die was sitting in front of his computer, the webcam light clearly on and what appeared to be a chat screen off to the side, indicating that Die was broadcasting himself. He bit his lip to keep in the snort he wanted to let out as he watched his lover play on webcam, his eyes taking in the covered-up tattoo and the angle of the camera. He watched for a few moments then very carefully cleared his throat, eyebrow raised, the front of his track pants very clearly tented out.

Die had been edging himself for nearly half an hour on screen, his viewers asking him to do various things for their pleasure. When Kyo entered the room, Die didn't even notice, having been stroking his cock and showing one of the viewers a good close-up of his foot when the other entered. 

When Kyo cleared his throat however, Die's reaction was instant. He froze for a few seconds. After a moment or so, he moved forward and went to type to the people on screen that he had to step away for a few minutes, and pasted a link to them for a few videos he'd put up eons ago to keep them busy in the meantime.

Making sure his mic was off, he tilted the screen down and then moved away from it and stood up, looking embarrassed. "Kyo... I... ah..."

Kyo watched Die get flustered and very quickly move away from the computer. When the other spoke, he let out a low chuckle, eyeing the computer still. "You what? Hmm...?" He stepped closer, running his eyes over Die's body.

"Well, I was..." he pursed his lips and then just held up a finger as he closed his eyes. It took him a few moments to compose himself and then he offered, "I sort of... have a channel... on this site."

Kyo's eyebrow went up another notch, though the idea of Die showing himself to complete strangers made his cock throb. For a split second, he contemplated the fact that he should be angry and shocked at what Die was doing. Honestly though, it only turned him on, and he knew his lover wasn't stupid enough to be recognizable. 

"You do, do you? For how long, and....how many viewers have watched you play with yourself tonight?"

"I've had it for years... but haven't used it since I've been with you, ah," he rubbed his hand over his nose, leaving a little smudge of concealer behind. "Except since the start of last month and us being so busy." He gave the other a sheepish sort of look.

Kyo stood there for a moment, debating what his next act should be. He stalled by reaching up and rubbing the concealer smudge from Die's nose. "Mm, I see. And you've always been careful, yes?"

"I'm not stupid. The mic is off right now, and I tilted the camera down so no one can see us either. No mirrors or pictures where I choose, nothing identifiable. I always cover my tattoo," he showed him. "And I cover my tracks in some more complicated ways... always have."

Kyo listened to Die's explanation then nodded. He reached out a grabbed Die's hand, placing it over his aching cock. "You can continue to play cam whore...if you can do it while sucking my cock," he offered, a smirk on his lips now.

"Fuck yes," Die returned, grasping Kyo's cock for a moment before releasing it and moving back over to the computer. He murmured, "Change shoes... too obvious. Put on leather gloves just in case your hand comes down too far at any point. And your cock is not going to be on cam, so don't worry about that." Kyo groaned as Die fondled him, his hips canting forward slightly. He left the room to change into his house slippers and slide on the leather gloves.

With that, Die moved the laptop screen back up very carefully and then murmured, "Turning on the mic again." He moved to start flipping it on, but paused. "Oh, and there's thirty seven people in here right now." He turned on the mic and typed in that he was back, waving once again at the others. He typed in a message about his lover coming home and catching him, and then said he was going to suck his dick while he played with himself, so they'd just have to imagine the top half before letting out a small, sexy chuckle and settling.

Kyo returned to hear Die explain what happened. He gave his own low chuckle as he stepped over to the other, stroking his gloved hand over his cheek.

Die watched his chat window explode with people pleased that he was back and then glanced up at Kyo, giving him his best _I'm trusting you with this_ look before reaching down to start stroking over his cock again. "He's horny already," Die murmured, pitching his voice slightly different from his usual speaking tone. He motioned for Kyo to come closer, so his legs would be in frame while they did this at least.

Kyo licked his lips and stepped forward, watching the screen and seeing where his legs were in the frame. He stroked his hand through Die's hair before easing his pants down slightly, pulling his cock free. "How could I not be with a sexy thing like you willing to suck my throbbing cock?" he murmured, his tone low.

A thrill went through Die at the idea of doing this with everyone listening to him. His cock twitched, and he abandoned it for a moment, reaching for Kyo's length and stroking it a few dozen times. He licked over the head and then groaned as he slid it into his mouth, reaching back down to start stroking himself off again.

Kyo was finding this entire thing incredibly arousing, and he let out a deep moan to show his appreciation. He pushed his hips forward, sliding his cock further into Die's mouth. "Fuck...so good. Your mouth is so hot and wet around my cock."

Die slurped over his lover's cock as he worked over his shaft in a rather heated manner. He'd already been edging and now he was just so aroused his eyes were crossing as he went after both himself and Kyo. Low groans and moans of appreciation flooded from his mouth as he went after him.

Finally, he took a moment to read the comments on screen, breathing out a laugh. "J2738, his cock is magnificent, but I fear it's only for my viewing pleasure." He scrolled down and then lightly tapped Kyo's thigh to get him to turn his leg a bit. Another comment popped and Die murmured, "They think your legs are toned and lovely. So do I."

With that, he went back to sucking the other's cock, eager to do his very best.

Kyo didn't bother holding back his moans of pleasure as Die went after him, his hand on the back of his head urging him on. When Die pulled off to read the comments, he took a breath and steadied himself, not wanting to lose it quite so soon. 

At the comment about his cock, he offered another low chuckle. "Sorry, he's selfish like that..." He then shifted around, tugging up one of his pants legs to reveal bare calf to the viewer that commented on it. He found himself slipping into this sort of thing easily, his exhibitionist side loving the hell out of it. 

After a few more minutes of Die sucking him, he breathed out a soft groan then spoke. "I'm not there yet, but when I do cum, where do y'all want me to shoot it? On his pretty face? All over his cock?"

Die nearly lost it at that comment, having to squeeze the base of his cock harshly to not spray everywhere with those words alone. He let out a moan that made that fact perfectly clear. He pushed his hips up and then settled again as his chat window went off like crazy.

Kyo watched Die attempt to reign himself in, choosing that moment to push his cock deeper down his throat. "You've been taking orders from them all night, now it's my turn. Finger yourself for me...for us...because after this, I'm going to fuck you into the middle of next week."

Die's reaction was immediate, sliding his hand down between his legs to push two fingers into his passage. He'd already been fingering himself earlier for someone, so it wasn't difficult in the least.

When Die pushed his fingers into himself, Kyo groaned, jerking his hips. "Oh fuck, look at you. Already loosened up for me." He threaded his fingers in Die's hair, pushing his head down slightly as he bucked his hips. 

He could feel himself getting close to losing it, having already been worked up and the situation at hand lending itself to his arousal. "Gonne cum soon," he groaned out.

Die's cock finally twitched all of its own accord, cum starting to spurt out of his cock and shoot across the floor in front of him. He moaned loudly as he lost it. 

Kyo watched Die cum, letting out his own moan as his lover painted the floor in front of him. He shifted forward and looked at the screen seeing several requests for him to spurt on Die's stomach and cock. "Mm, fuck, look how gorgeous he is when he cums," he groaned out, nearly fucking Die's mouth for a moment. 

Finally, he pulled out and stroked his cock a few times before aiming at Die's stomach and shooting onto it. The next spurt landed on Die's cock as well as the last few. "Fuck, _yes_."

Die shuddered a bit and then arched into Kyo's cum landing on him, making a scene of how his hips twisted and turned. He bit his lower lip and then settled as he reached down to start messing around in Kyo's cum on his body.

Kyo grunted as the last of his cum dribbled from the head of his dick. He shifted close to Die again, cupping the back of his neck and pushing the tip past his lips, smirking down at him. 

He pulled out a minute later then stepped out of frame, licking his lips. "Did they enjoy that, baby? My cum splattering all over you?"

Die leaned forward after Kyo had stepped back, reading the comments. "You made two of them cum, I got another three with mine." He chuckled and then shifted forward, getting up and then squatting down instead so everyone could see everything he had to offer as he pushed his fingers into his asshole a few times.

Kyo grinned. "Good...," he offered, watching Die squat and start fingering himself. Another shudder of lust slid through him, and he reached down to run his fingers over his sensitive cock. "That's it, stretching that glorious hole out for my dick. I'm gonna pound you so hard."

Die pulled his fingers free and showed them to the camera, covered in the lube he'd been using earlier. Leaning forward, he got some tissue paper and wiped them off before leaning back and wriggling his fingers at the camera. "Later, guys. The rest is mine!" He typed in the ending command and then shut off the camera, closing down the site and then shutting the computer lid. Standing up, he gestured Kyo with him out of the room, padding off down the hallway to the bedroom.

Kyo watched the lewd display with hunger in his eyes. As soon as Die was finished, he quickly followed him down the hallway, barely giving the other a chance to get into the bedroom before slamming him against the wall. His pressed their mouths together in a heated kiss, his tongue plunging into Die's hot mouth, tasting himself there.

Die had honestly expected to have to talk some things out, but instead he had Kyo all over him. He groaned into the kiss, having no issues with not talking. He arched toward his lover, one hand coming up to brush through very short hair, little whimpering sounds falling from his lips as they kissed and ground against one another.

Kyo grunted against Die's lips, reaching down to grasp his hips as he ground against him, feeling his cock swelling once more. He broke the kiss only to move to Die's neck, biting the skin there then licking over it before moving to another spot.

"Jesus, Kyo," Die breathed out. He'd never thought this would rile the other up like it was, but obviously he'd been completely wrong about what would and would not get his lover going.

Kyo nipped Die's neck once more then lifted his head, staring at Die with fire burning in his eyes. He captured his lips again instead of speaking, practically rutting against him, his hands sliding around to cup his bared ass. 

After a few moments, he stilled only to shift his hand back and stroke his fingers over Die's entrance, pushing one into the already lubed passage with a groan.

Die whined as Kyo thrust a finger into his hole, hips arching harshly forward. He shuddered and then stilled, moving one leg up to try and give Kyo some extra working space down below.

Kyo shifted himself and grabbed Die's leg, hitching it up on his hip and holding it there as he fingered him from behind. The angle was slightly awkward but something about doing it this way was erotic to the vocalist.

Die groaned as Kyo moved his leg up, holding him in place. It was sexy to have him doing this sort of thing to him right after having had a cam session. That had always been something for him that set him off even harder after doing it. It was part of why he did, just begging to actually cum hard enough the second time to not crave the feeling of another person pressed up hard against him. But now Kyo was here, and it was better than ever before, his excitement running high and his body on fire from doing something so forbidden.

Kyo leaned in to lick at Die's collarbone, adding a second finger and thrusting the digits hard into Die's body. His cock was almost fully hard again, and he humped against Die's leg as he went after him.

Die's head hit the wall as he groaned in frustration. "Fuck, put it in!" he finally cried out, impatient and ready to be done with the prep that he honestly didn't require.

Kyo pulled back at Die's impatient statement. He laughed and licked his lips, smirking at his lover. "Tsk, good things come to those who wait, Daisuke...I was just enjoying fingering your tight ass..." He stepped away and moved over to the bed, ridding himself of his gloves, shoes and pants. "C'mere and get into whatever position you want it in...and I might fuck you. "

Die watched Kyo get rid of the gloves, a small amount of regret going through him at that. After a moment, he picked up the one that hadn't been on the hand fingering his ass and held it back out. "Put it on and choke me with that hand at some point." The request was out there, floating on the air.

With that, he moved to the bed, kneeling on the edge of it so Kyo would have to stand behind him, his legs spread and his elbows on the bed.

Kyo took the glove with a smirk, sliding it back over his hand. "Gladly," he murmured, moving into position behind his lover, stroking his hips for a moment. He finally reached down to grasp his cock, lining up with Die's hole and pushing himself into his lover with one single thrust, a moan sliding past his lips. "Fuck!" He relished the way Die's body clenched around him, staying still as long as he could stand it before starting up a quick pace, thrusting hard into Die.

Die cried out as Kyo's cock speared into his body, whimpering faintly as he bowed his head and let Kyo ride him hard. It felt so good to have his lover inside him finally, his hole fluttering lightly around Kyo's intruding cock.

Kyo's hand moved to rest in the middle of Die's back as he fucked him hard. His ungloved hand slid around to grasp his lover's cock, jerking him off a few times then letting go in favor of scratching his nails down his side.

Die whimpered at all the things Kyo was doing to him, the variance of the glove on his body and then the nails on his skin. He bucked and moved with Kyo as best as he could, squirming slightly with each movement.

The vocalist shifted and thrust harder into Die as pleasure overwhelmed, a groan slipping from his lips. He slipped his gloved hand up along Die's back then finally around to his neck. He just barely squeezed for the moment, focusing more on fucking Die rather than choking him, wanting both of them to be near their peak.

Die let out a thin whine as Kyo's hand came up to his throat. He strained into it, gasping in a few good breaths before he knew it'd be deprived nearly entirely. He craved it in a way he couldn't explain, his eyelids fluttering closed as he waited on it.

Kyo relentlessly pounded into Die for several moments before his fingers finally closed around his lover's slender throat. He slowly increased the pressure as he pushed his cock deeper into Die's body, a shudder rippling through him.

Die still pushed forward with him, his airway finally cutting off. He clawed at the bed, his body trembling as he did his best to hump back against Kyo's cock at the same time. He was teetering on the edge now, cock hard as a rock, his eyes wild as his face reddened.

Kyo reached to urge Die to turn his face, wanting to see him even as he fucked him hard. Finally, Kyo closed his hand very tightly around Die's throat, cutting his air completely. He dropped his other hand down, fingers wrapping around Die's cock, stroking him quickly as he bucked against him. "Cum...spill it for me," he groaned out, so very close to losing it again himself.

Those words were like a trigger for Die, and in the next few moments, he was falling over the edge, his cock twitching as he emptied himself over the sheets beneath his body, one hand weakly clawing at Kyo's wrist as his vision began to fade around the edges.

Just as Die began clawing at his hand, Kyo released his throat and grabbed his hips, fingers biting into the flesh as he thrust hard into him. He repeated the action a couple of times then cried out Die's name as he began cumming, filling his lover's passage. "Fuck!"

Die gasped in a breath the instant he was allowed to, nearly falling flat on his face against the mattress, his ass end up in the air even further as Kyo began to fill his passage with his sweet, sweet release.

Kyo shuddered as the last of his cum spurted into Die's body. When he was certain he was finished, he eased out and flopped down beside his lover. He reached out to stroke his hand through Die's red locks, smirking at him. "Jesus..."

Die slowly oozed down onto the bed, lying there panting, a sort of star-struck look on his face as he gazed off into nothingness. Something about it had drained him, but it felt so fucking good.

Kyo chuckled softly at the way Die just melted into the bed, his hand moving to stroke his lover's back. He fought off a yawn and shifted closer. "Mmm, that was amazing. I need to catch you doing such things more often..."

Die breathed out a quiet sound that probably should have been words but wasn't. After a few minutes, he finally offered a quiet, "You're really not mad?"

In the time it took for Die to find words, Kyo had shifted onto his back. His lover's question made him chuckle as he shook his head. "No, I should be...but I'm not. Just incredibly turned on."

"Do... I need to explain myself, or is it sort of obvious?"

Kyo hummed, reaching over to stroke Die's back. "You can explain...I am curious."

"So, I started doing the chats a long time ago. I was watching for a long time and then one day did one that was like a shared chat sort of thing right after I got my first webcam." Die trailed off for a moment, curling up on his side and then settling again. "Discovered I really liked it, and for a while it was a good substitute for fucking everything that moved. So I did it for nearly two years, about once a month. Recorded the odd video here and there as well, around the same time I was doing those vids I have saved on my computer of me with huge things stuffed up my asshole, remember?"

Kyo rolled over and looked at Die, reaching to remove the glove, tossing it to the floor as he listened. "Mm, I remember those quite well..."

"I didn't post any of the kinky things... but there's still a few of me out there just jerking off or playing with my ass... and I always avoid my face, never had the guts, so it turned out well in the long run, right?" Die laughed softly. "Can you imagine the scandal?" He shook his head, the question not requiring an answer. "I guess with you being gone a lot recently, I just needed something to try to satisfy me in your absence... so I've done a few again." He reached for Kyo's hand. "But I'll stop if you want me to. I think it's something we both should have a say in."

Kyo huffed out a laugh then quieted, considering whether he wanted Die doing that sort of thing again or not. "Considering that I found it to be an amazing turn on...perhaps occasionally doing it isn't so bad...I know you'll be careful...."

Die stroked over Kyo's fingers and then clasped his hand in his own. "I would rather have you here more often... I miss you."

Kyo sighed softly, pain and guilt bubbling up within him at Die's words. He frowned and squeezed Die's hand tightly. "I know...I miss you, too..."

Frowning a little, Die reached to pull Kyo closer to him. "Don't... I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I just..." he shook his head, tucking his face against Kyo's neck. "I'm sorry."

The vocalist bit his lip, pulling Die close and wrapping his arm around him. "Don't be. Please. It's just that I've been feeling neglectful lately with all of these late nights...not to mention the upcoming Europe tour...I mean, we knew things would be stressful, but still..."

"I wish I could go with you... I'm going to miss you something awful while you're actually gone..." _if it's already this bad_... the last part he left unsaid, though he was sure his tone probably reflected it anyway.

Kyo only nodded, his arm squeezing tightly around Die as he pressed his face against the other's shoulder. After a few moments, he cleared his throat and spoke, though his voice was quiet and ever so slightly wavering. "Yeah, it's going to be difficult...Has Kaoru mentioned when you might be able to come over?"

"No... I'm not entirely sure I can, to be honest." Die frowned even more at that, the mood quickly dipping from the earlier excitement.

Kyo growled slightly, feeling frustration creeping up on him. "Seriously? I asked him before I even finalized the tour dates." The vocalist sighed and shook his head, reaching and pulling Die into a position so that he could press his lips to his forehead. "I'm sorry, Koi."

Die draped one leg over Kyo's hip, reaching to cup his cheek and studying him carefully for a long few moments before he spoke softly, but with great intention in his voice. "I will not go on camera again. Call that a last hurrah. I'm yours, and yours alone, even just my image on a screen."

Kyo peered at Die for several moments then leaned in and kissed him hard. "Thank you. I love you, so much."

"I love you, too." Die leaned his head on Kyo's arm. "I will still try to slip away if at all possible. Maybe London..."

Kyo nodded, stroking his hand over Die's face. "Okay, I'll have a chat with Kaoru again..."

Die closed his eyes, just resting there. After a bit, he finally decided to change the tone. "I really liked the leather gloves touch..."

Kyo had faintly dozed when Die spoke again. He let out a rumbling chuckle, his hand stroking through Die's hair. "Yeah? Did you like me choking you with it?"

"I do," the guitarist returned. "It really turned me on."

Kyo licked his lips, shifting a bit. "It really turned me on, too. I love the way you get when I'm choking you."

Die was quiet for a moment before offering softly, "It's a bit trust thing with me... I hand myself over to you when we do that, and I think it makes it more fulfilling."

Kyo considered Die's words for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, I agree...I feel similar when it's your hand around my throat."

Nuzzling in a bit more, Die just offered a small smile and a nod, already feeling like he was about to fall asleep. He was so tired from not sleeping quite right while Kyo wasn't beside him, and now that he was here, he wanted nothing more than to just sleep with his arms around him.

Kyo stroked Die's back a bit more then finally reached for a portion of their covers that weren't soiled. Uncaring about the mess on their bodies, he tugged the blanket over them and settled down, closing his eyes. "Sleep now, Koi," he mumbled, fast on his way to doing the same.

Die's only response was the soft sound of his breath, already deepened by his sleep as he faded further and further into his dreams.


	80. Chapter 80

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

The Sukekiyo European tour had proven to be both fantastic and incredibly stressful for Kyo. Stressful because he was apart from Die and missed him terribly, as well as just being in another country where the language wasn't his strong suite. He spent most of what little free time he had just as he did with Dir en grey tours, sticking to the bus and tending to business or drawing. On three occasions, he'd managed to get Wifi enough to Skype with Die, and the shows following those times were the best. 

His lover hadn't been able to make it to the London show as they'd previously hoped so by the time Kyo landed in Tokyo after nearly 24 hours in transit, he was desperate to be home. Aside from that, he had something that he thought would make Die extremely happy. 

It was nearing 2am when his taxi pulled up to their home, and he all but bolted inside after paying the driver. He was quiet as he removed his shoes and set his luggage by the front door, minus his carry-on which he took upstairs as he silently made his way to their bedroom, anxious to curl up in his own bed with Die next to him.

Die had already had a long day in the studio, finishing up his recording, and though he'd been very excited about Kyo coming home, it had done little to keep him up. Exhaustion and a warm bath were all it took for Die to end up curled under a huge array of covers, Kyo's pillow stuffed against his face as he clung to it like it was a lifeline, fast asleep.

The sight that greeted Kyo as he entered their bedroom made his heart ache. He set his bag down by the door and stripped out of his clothing, leaving only his boxers. He crawled into the bed from his side and scooted over until he was pressed against Die. His arm encircled Die's waist as he pushed his face against his warm neck and breathed in his scent.

Die didn't actually wake up, but he easily traded the thing that only barely smelled like Kyo for the real thing, reaching for him in his sleep and snuffling a bit as he burrowed himself against Kyo.

Kyo smiled as Die shifted in his sleep, his head turning slightly to press a kiss under his jaw. He lay there for a while before shifting a bit closer and closing his eyes, content to simply fall asleep for now, travel having exhausted him.

It was hours before Die woke up, his bladder rather insistently telling him that drinking before bedtime was something he should have left to his twenties and early thirties. With a sigh, he opened his eyes and started to move, only to freeze and shift back from his lover enough to see him. A smile slid over his lips once he realized in his sleep-addled mind that it was, indeed, Kyo he was holding onto. He brushed his hand lightly over Kyo's cheek before untangling himself and slipping off to the bathroom to relieve himself.

Kyo woke up at the touch and opened his eyes in time to see Die leave the room. Figuring his lover was off to take a morning piss, Kyo rolled onto his back and stretched before relaxing down into the bed to wait on Die.

Die relieved himself and then came back into the bedroom right after, trudging back in and flopping down next to his lover. He tugged the covers back over himself and then rolled onto his side next to Kyo.

Kyo grinned as Die returned, immediately scooting back against him, cupping his cheek. "I'm home," he murmured.

"So you are," Die smiled against the other's shoulder. "I couldn't be happier that you are."

Kyo shifted and pressed his lips to Die's, not caring if either of them had morning breathe. "Me, too. The flight was agony, and I just wanted to be home with you."

"Turbulance or just missing your DaiDai?" The redhead cracked a smile at that one.

Kyo snorted and tweaked Die's side lightly. "Missing my DaiDai and my seat mate snored the entire way from Hong Kong to Tokyo. I wanted to stuff a sock in his mouth."

"Oh lord... band member, staff, or random person?" Die snapped lightly at Kyo's fingers as they passed him by.

Kyo yanked his hand out of the way only to push it into Die's mussed up hair. "Random person. I was supposed to have a seat to myself, but they fucked it up and booked someone next to me."

"Lovely..." Die leaned a bit so Kyo could actually see his hair better. "I refreshed the dye... in case you're wondering."

Kyo hummed then smiled, carefully pulling his lover's strands into the light for a better look at the red. "I did wonder; it's gorgeous...as always." He released Die's hair and pushed himself up on his elbow, leaning down to nip the guitarist's bottom lip. "But your hair could be grey, and it would still be gorgeous on you.

"Aww, so kind and loving, you are." Die did his best to get a hold on Kyo's short blonde strands, tugging him closer and kissing him full on the mouth for a moment. "I'm trying to behave myself here... let you recoup enough to get through the next few days of recording. But you're making it difficult, just so you know."

Kyo snorted then let out a soft sound as Die kissed him. He took a breath and let out a huff of a laugh. "It took me a great amount of restraint not to jump you in your sleep." 

With a sigh, he pushed away from Die and stood up, moving to grab the bag he'd brought up with him. He dug around in it for a moment then produced two shop bags, one with a rather posh logo on it. He crawled back into bed and sat cross-legged next to Die, holding the one with the logo on it out to him.

Die eyeballed him for a moment and then sat up, tucking one comforter around himself and then reaching for the bag. "Overseas gifts?"

Kyo smiled a little and nodded. "I found it on the one trip I took off the bus. I hope you like it. I know it's not your usual style...but..."

Die grinned at him and then opened the bag, pulling out a small box labeled _Saint Laurent Paris_. He slid the lid off the box and extracted a double-banded, leather wrist cuff with little bi-cylindrical studs on it. He slid his fingers over the buttery leather and grinned at Kyo, quickly opening the buckles and placing it around his wrist, starting to fasten it up. "It's great, thank you!"

Kyo watched as Die pulled out the cuff, his lip between his teeth. When the other started putting it on, he actually relaxed and smiled. "I'm glad you like it. It took me forever to decide."

"Aww, were you worried I wasn't going to like it?" Die reached to brush his knuckles over Kyo's cheek.

Kyo leaned into the touch, his cheeks flushing. "Yeah, a bit. You know I always second guess my gifts... which is why this next thing is...ah...well, I'll just show you." 

He reached into the second shop bag and pulled out a large pamphlet, staring at it for a moment before handing it over to Die. "Takumi gave it to me," he offered by way of explanation.

Die accepted the pamphlet, glancing at the name on the top, the Hawaii Kotohira Jinsha-Hawaii Dazaifu Tenmangu Shinto shrine. He tilted his head a little and then smiled as he flipped it open and studied the various things within it, all of it in English. The third fold held information about weddings and Die's eyes quickly found the information that they did accept gay weddings and that as of last year, gay marriage was completely legal in Hawaii.

His eyes darted back up to Kyo and he studied him for a moment. "A suggestion?" he asked softly.

Kyo shifted around as Die read the information on the pamphlet. He knew it was a huge step in their future plans, and the idea had his stomach in tight knots as he awaited his lover's reaction. He reached up and ran a hand over his short hair, nodding then shrugging slightly. "It's, ah, yeah...a suggestion," he replied, his voice wavering the tiniest bit.

Die reached out and tugged Kyo basically into his lap, looping an arm around his waist and then opening the pamphlet again. "You need to unwind, sweetpea... you're like one of those wind-up walking ducks that's been wound too tight. Breathe and calm down. Then we can discuss."

Kyo let out an undignified sound as he was tugged into Die's lap. He huffed at the pet name and comparison to a wind-up duck of all things. Still, he settled and leaned back against his lover's chest, sniffing a bit. "I can't help it. This is such a big, big thing for us..."

"Which is exactly why you need to be calm while we discuss this." Die kissed his cheek and then tapped the pamphlet again. "Okay, so... you would like for us to have a Shinto wedding?"

Kyo hummed and shifted a bit before stilling again. "It's traditional...and unlike our reception, it would be just our family and close friends..."

Die stroked over Kyo's arm lightly. "I'm not opposed to the idea, but you would need to... prep me on this. Every wedding I've ever been to has been more westernized."

Kyo nodded then grabbed the pamphlet, flipping it to another page. "See? There's quite a bit of ceremony to it. Certain rituals and such. Later, I'll pull up a webpage for you that explains it all in detail..."

With a little hum, Die pursed his lips and then smiled. "Okay. I'd be happy to do this with you. Just let me know what you need me to do to prepare, that's all." He nuzzled the other's neck a bit.

Kyo's heart swelled as Die said he'd be happy with doing the Shinto ceremony. He nodded and then turned, pressing his lips to the other’s in a deep kiss.

Once Kyo pulled back from the kiss, Die nipped his lover's lower lip and then smiled. "Mmm... does that mean I get to find someone to plan us a huge, horrible bachelor party?"

Kyo pushed his hands into Die's hair and laughed softly. "Sure...go for it...but aren't we technically supposed to have separate parties?"

"Mmm... do you want separate ones?"

"I'm not sure, to be honest. I hadn't honestly considered having one for myself even though I knew you would definitely want one." Kyo leaned in and nuzzled against Die's neck, nipping softly. "It's truly up to you, love.

"I think... I'd rather it be both of us." Die rubbed over Kyo's arms lightly. "I don't really believe in the 'last hurrah' part of a bachelor party, but I do like the idea of a night of strip clubs and drinking with you by my side."

Kyo considered it for a moment then grinned widely. "How about instead of an ordinary strip club, we visit a fetish club?"

Die arched an eyebrow and then chuckled. "Sounds fitting for us," he returned. "Specific type or just a general one?"

Kyo considered it a moment then smirked. "Shibari… definitely shibari..."

"Sounds good to me." Die lightly kissed his temple and then closed his eyes, tilting his head back and then flopping over onto his back. "I love you, darling."

Kyo smiled then lay down with Die, curling against him. "I love you, too, Koi."

"So tell me... did you have any adventures in getting off while you were gone?"

The vocalist let out a snort at the question. "I was going to save confession for later but…since you asked...yes...I did."

"Do tell," Die responded quietly. "I'd love to hear about it all."

Kyo licked his lips and considered which adventure to tell first. "Mm, well, the first night in Europe, I couldn't sleep. So I took a walk around the hotel and came upon a couple fucking in the stairwell. They didn't see me, but I could see them, and I'm not ashamed to say that I watched until the end…mine and theirs."

Die breathed out a quiet laugh, rolling to plaster himself to Kyo's side. "Did you jerk off or just lose it from watching?"

Kyo ran a hand along Die's arm, chuckling softly. "I jerked off then got the hell out before they could see me."

"Just a cum stain on the stairs?" Die rolled onto his back, grinning something awful. "You perverted bastard. I love it... next?"

"Yep, just a splatter and the creak of a door..." He smirked, moving his hand to track his nails over Die's chest. "Mmmn...the next and my favorite...After the third show, I was so worked up, I went backstage and secluded myself in the dressing room with a video of you on my phone. I jizzed so much in my pants that it seeped out."

"In your pants?" Die grinned at him and then reached down to rub over Kyo's crotch. "You thought about me the whole time?" he murmured softly. "I sort of... got you off long-distance?"

Kyo's hips jerked up roughly into Die's hand, his breath hitching. His body had no problem responding to the touch, his cock swelling rapidly. "Gods...yeah, you did..."

Die leaned down to nip the other's jawline gently. "Mmm... anything else?" he murmured quietly.

Kyo took a breath to settle himself somewhat then laughed a little. "I'm fairly certain Uta and Mika saw me fucking a fleshlight in my bunk one night when I didn't close the curtain well enough..."

A low laugh breathed life from Die's lungs before he licked the other's neck ever so lightly. "Did they respond at all?"

Kyo shivered at the lick and shook his head. "No, well...Uta blushed a bit, but Mika pretended like he saw nothing and just kept walking. I just kept up what I was doing. I was too far into it to stop."

"Naughty beast!" Die grabbed at Kyo's dick again. "Any other trouble you got yourself into?"

When Die's hand groped him again, Kyo let out a low moan, heat slicing through him. He reached out and grabbed one of the bags again, pulling out a bundle of scarlet satin. "I got these for you but couldn't wait and ended up 'ruining' them..." He tossed the bundle to Die, smirking. There was a huge cum stain on the backside of the panties from where he'd jacked off with them.

Die opened the bundle, revealing the underwear and the cum stain on the backside. He grinned at that and then settled down. "You dirty bug!"

Kyo snorted then looked at Die, lust burning in his eyes. "Are you going to finish what you started?" he questioned lowly, glancing down at his now achingly hard cock.

"Maybe... if you tell me how it felt to jizz these, and if you put them on or if you just used them to jack off... or what you did."

"You drive a hard bargain there..." Kyo shifted a bit then took the panties, folding them in half before wrapping them around his dick. He gave himself a couple of strokes then stopped, moving them again. "Like that. I wrapped them around my cock and thought of fucking your tight ass through a hole in them."

Die chuckled. "I love you dearly, and your perverted mind is always a match for my own." He moved the panties aside and then reached to start stroking Kyo's dick. "Tell me you still want to fuck my asshole."

Kyo licked his lips, grinning widely. "I always want to fuck your asshole, baby." He rolled his hips up, letting out a faint moan. "I always crave to sink my throbbing cock deep into your warm, clenching hole. Fuck you ‘til you scream; fuck you until you can't remember your fucking name, and all you can do is scream mine."

"Damn, time away has given you a dirty fucking mouth," Die breathed out. He flopped back and pushed off his underwear. "Then find the fucking lube, and take me, darling."

Kyo was quick to push the covers back and shift enough so that he could reach into their nightstand drawer. "It's about to get fucking dirtier." He selected strawberry scented lube and set it on the pillow behind Die's head. Then, he shifted down the bed and grabbed his lover's thighs, pushing them apart as he dipped down and started licking around Die's entrance.

"Oh dear sweet Jesus!" Die cried out as Kyo started rimming him with no preamble at all. He strained for a moment and then pushed his legs over Kyo's shoulders, spreading his legs a bit more.

The way Die reacted only spurred Kyo on. He spread Die's cheeks, lapping his tongue over the creased skin of his lover's asshole, making the sloppiest noises possible.

Whining, Die pushed toward Kyo's tongue and threw an arm over his face. It embarrassed him just now much he loved this sort of thing and how much he drank up the way the other touched him in these moments. The feeling of his tongue on his asshole was dirty and amazing and sent lust spiraling through him in ways he hadn't remembered he could feel in a while.

Kyo drew his tongue up along Die's taint then leaned forward and sucked at the skin there before continuing up to his balls. He drew them into his mouth one at time, letting his teeth graze the sensitive flesh. When he released them, he dropped his head back down and resumed eating Die's ass, finally spearing his tongue into his lover's body.

Die cried out harshly, his hole spasming around Kyo's tongue. He writhed slightly and then settled, not wanting to suffocate his lover with his reactions to things. "Fuck!"

Kyo wriggled his tongue inside Die's spasming hole, fucking him with it as much as he could. Finally, he pulled back and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before grabbing the lube. 

After squirting some onto his cock, he gave it a few strokes before shifting between Die's legs. He grabbed his lover's thighs none too gently and positioned himself. Gazing into Die's eyes, he pushed in with one hard thrust, a groan escaping him.

Die pushed up against Kyo's cock when he shifted into position. A second later, he was pierced by the other's invading cock, and he couldn't help but arch hard, a sharp cry falling from his lips. His hands moved to splay out to his sides, grabbing at the material beneath him, clenching tightly as his dick strained and trembled. It took everything he had not to start cumming just from that action alone.

Kyo took a few seconds to let his eyes rove over his lover's body and the way his cock strained. Another groan left his lips as he began thrusting into Die, a shiver working its way down his spine.

Die nearly sobbed when Kyo started to thrust into him. He was so turned on there was no way he'd take very long with this, no matter how much he tried to keep himself together. He whimpered and then with another of Kyo's bucks against him, he was falling, not a thing he could do to stop it. He could feel everything tightening and then the wave of euphoria just before his cock began to spurt his release all over him.

Kyo was so wrapped up in his own pleasure that he hardly noticed Die cumming for the first few moments. When he finally felt the clench of his lover's body around him, he slowed and resorted to slow, deep thrusts instead. He moved his hand to wrap around Die's cock, stroking him through the last of his orgasm then sliding his hand through the mess. 

He shifted some, hitching Die's leg up on his shoulder and rocking against him as he brought his soiled fingers to his lips and sucked Die's juices from them with a moan. "So gorgeous, Koi..."

"Couldn't... ah! Couldn't help... it!" Die gasped out as Kyo continued to move over him, watching the other from under shadowed lids.

Kyo smiled, continuing to push into Die's body, his own cock rock hard and aching for release. "I noticed...," he murmured. He turned his head and pressed his lips to Die's calf, his hand stroking over his thigh.

Shivering, Die stared up at his lover for all of a few seconds before breathing out, "Fuck me hard until you're done, baby."

Kyo gave a nod and lowered Die's leg down. He shifted forward and leaned down to kiss the other's lips then sat back onto his heels, pulling Die to him by his hips. He held on as he started thrusting into him, setting up a quick pace.

Die's cock twitched as Kyo began thrusting against him harder. "God, yes... please, oh god, fuck me harder!"

Kyo had no problem doing as Die asked. He spread his legs slightly to give himself more leverage and went after Die as hard as he could, his head dropping back. "Fu-fuck Die!"

Die watched the other in awe, something about Kyo fucking him like that leaving him absolutely in love with the physicality of the other in that moment. He shuddered and then breathed out a soft, "You're gorgeous, darling."

Kyo cracked open his eyes to peer at Die when the other spoke. A smile spread across his parted lips, his hands running down Die's thighs to his hips. He held onto his lover as he fucked him, his speed increasing the closer he got to spilling it.

Die bit his lip and then breathed out a soft, adoring sigh before he closed his own eyes and simply felt what the other was doing, allowing it to nearly overwhelm him.

Finally, Kyo shifted again and leaned over Die, pushing his face against his neck. He pressed his lips to damp skin as his hips rocked against the other. In just another moment, he was letting out a muffled cry, pushing in hard once more then stilling as he started to cum.

Die let out a pleased little sound when Kyo started to cum, canting his hips slightly to ensure part of it would remain inside of him even if Kyo pulled out right away.

Kyo shuddered as the last few spurts of cum emptied out of him into Die. He moaned softly and nuzzled against Die's neck, staying as he was for now. "Gods...your body is like heaven, Koi."

"I missed you in me," Die admitted quietly in return.

Kyo lifted his head and kissed Die before smiling against his lips. "I missed being in you...around you...with you...everything."

"Me, too, baby... me, too." Die reached up and tugged him down closer, closing his eyes again and releasing a relieved sort of sigh. "God I've missed you... you have no idea."

The vocalist gave a soft sound as he was pulled closer. He pushed his fingers through Die's hair, practically clinging to the redhead. "Oh, I have an idea...because I missed you, too. So much that it was sort of hard to concentrate...on anything."

Die reached to brush his hands over Kyo's short hair again and then smiled before he kissed his lover's cheek. "I adore you."


	81. Chapter 81

It had been an exhausting run of two straight nights in Kyoto, but Die had also been more than pleased to do it. He'd given his all for both shows and had fun at the A Knot only events.

The first night had been his birthday, and he'd ended up out with friends for the night while Kyo rested up for the following night. It wasn't anything Die worried about particularly, the date not mattering as much as the sentiment, and he'd already received all the wishes in the world from Kyo and most everyone else in the days prior. That night had just been one to fill with drinking and falling into bed at six am only to be up again and running by eleven. 

The twenty first had been another hell of a show, leaving Die grinning ear to ear and pleased, even giving an interview right after. Once again, he'd found himself out with friends, eating dinner and then ending up back at the hotel around three in the morning with a checkout time of eleven.

He'd pulled himself up and dragged through his shower and morning routine by ten and then plunked himself down next to an already clean, but still clearly asleep Kyo, reaching to push his bangs back from his forehead, smirking a bit at how his spunky haircut stuck up in every direction. "Hey, darlin'... you gonna wake up for me?"

Kyo wrinkled his brows together but didn't open his eyes, yawning instead. "Do I have to?" he mumbled sleepily, clearly not ready to be awake, despite having showered and even finished off most of a cup of tea.

"Yup. We get kicked out in about an hour, and I have plans for us, my sweet, sweet darling." Die lightly rubbed his index finger over Kyo's nose, a smirk on his lips as he did it. "C'mon."

Kyo snapped teasingly at Die's finger then finally opened his eyes, peering at his lover. "You're affectionate today..." He offered a half smile and stood, stretching and yawning widely.

Die just beamed at Kyo and then rolled to his feet and padded off to their overnight bags. He pushed a muffin toward Kyo and picked up his own after shouldering his bag. "Tea in the lobby is better than up here and free. We can grab a cup on the way out."

Kyo took the offered muffin and then moved to grab up his own bag, following after Die towards the mention of tea. "Good, because that might as well have been water."

"Yup." Die opened the door and shooed Kyo out before doing a quick visual recheck of the room and then making sure he had all of his jewelry, which was something easily forgotten and harder to replace. He closed the door and headed toward the elevator. "Hope the coffee cake muffin was okay? It looked and smelled the best of the options."

Kyo shuffled towards the elevator then paused, inspecting the muffin he was holding. He gave it a sniff and nodded. "It looks pretty good; thanks, darling."

"Ooooo, I get darling-ed back!" Die stepped in once the elevator had arrived, leaning against the far glass wall that overlooked Kyoto on their way down. He gestured to the red-lit panel on the wall. "The one above 1 that says L is where we need to go to get tea."

Kyo laughed softly then stepped onto the elevator, punching the L button before moving to look out the window over his hometown. He felt a pang of nostalgia, wishing he could spend more time in the city.

Die waited until they arrived in the lobby, stepping out and holding the edge of the door so it wouldn't shut before Kyo got out. Once he was clear of the door, Die made his way to the little kiosk with hot water and tons of teas in various wall slots. He chose a random one, not bothering to see what it was, ripped open the bag and plopped it in a Styrofoam cup, topping it with water and examining the package only then to see how long to steep.

Kyo wandered after Die, taking more care to choose his tea. He finally selected a ginseng green mix, opened the package and adding it to his cup before pouring in the hot water.

Die just waited out the three minutes, standing there, staring aimlessly at the teas on the wall, seeing but not _truly_ seeing the variety. He finally pulled out his bag and trashed it, putting a lid on his cup and then taking a bite out of his muffin as he stepped to the side so Kyo could follow suit in lidding his cup.

Kyo took the few moments to check his messages on his phone, grunting as he deleted several. When Die moved, he popped the lid onto his cup then turned, looking up at the other. "So do we eat on the run or sit here?"

"Eat on the run. Plans, plans, and more plans." Die headed for the door, taking another huge bite of his muffin, looking a bit comical for doing so. He zigzagged down the flight of stairs to the first floor and then pushed outside into the cool air of the morning.

Kyo huffed just a little, taking a bite of the muffin then following after Die, wondering what on earth the other had in mind for the day.

Die weaved his way through throngs of people and toward the station, finally getting to the stalls and getting two passes to their destination station, ushering Kyo through and then following himself, leading the way to the platform without a word.

Kyo managed to keep up with Die, curiosity apparent on his face as he wondered just where they were going. He abandoned the idea of eating his muffin just then and simple fought to get around people. Once they were at the station, he finally paused, taking a good sip of his tea. "I don't suppose you'll give any hints?"

Die mimed zipping up his mouth, locking it, and tossing away the key before he grinned and took the last giant bit of his muffin, looking rather ridiculous all in all.

Kyo stared at the redhead then snorted, going about eating the rest of his muffin a bit more delicately. Once he finished it off, he swallowed down his tea then tossed his garbage just as the train was pulling up.

Die basically chugged his tea, throwing away his trash and brushing off crumbs before boarding the train, he caught the last seat and basically deposited Kyo in it before grabbing the strap over his head and holding on, facing the vocalist, his crotch essentially in his face now.

Kyo protested to no avail that Die was standing while he took the last seat. He finally gave up and simply took to staring straight ahead, trying to avoid the fact that he could nearly suck his lover off at this angle.

Die watched Kyo for a while, an amused look on his face until he finally started chuckling to himself, shaking his head and doing his best to give Kyo a little bit of room.

Kyo flicked his eyes up to Die's face, a blush creeping onto his cheeks. The person next to him shifted, and he edged over a bit. "You're an ass," he mouth up to his laughing lover.

Die winked at him and then basically settled to hang on the strap, his gaze out the window at the passing tunnel lights for a moment. Still, he said nothing, lending to the slightly creepy air of what was going on.

The vocalist just huffed, finally leaning back in his seat. He pulled out his phone and began to mess around with it, trying not to ask Die a million questions about where they were going.

They remained for a few more stops before one was announced, Die coughing to cover the actual name of the stop to Kyo's ears. He stepped back and poked Kyo, gesturing him off after him and headed toward the doors out. Fortunately for Die's little scheme, Kyo hadn't been paying attention and so when Die poked him, he had no idea where they were. Shrugging, he slipped out of his seat and followed after the other dutifully.

Die led them from the station and then flagged down a passing taxi, pulling a piece of paper from his pocket and handing it forward so he didn't have to say where he was going. The driver tucked the paper into the cup holder up front and nodded, flicking on the meter and waiting on all doors to be closed.

Kyo got into the taxi, not bothering to look around the station. He was quite enjoying Die's little game of mystery. "Do we have far to go from here?"

"Nope." Die beamed at his lover and settled back, watching the storefronts pass them by. Eventually, they arrived at their destination, a small park across from one of the many shrines in Kyoto. He stepped out after swiping his card to pay for the ride, heading toward a bench where two people sat, their backs to the street.

Kyo hummed then spent the rest of the ride in silence. When they got out, he recognized the area but wasn't sure why Die would bring them to a park like this and keep it secret. Still, he smiled as he peered across the way at the shrine, a feeling of peace tugging at him.

Die moved them toward the bench and then stepped around in front of it, gently maneuvering Kyo around as well before he gave a short bow and murmured, "As requested," before backing up a few steps and tucking his hands behind his back.

Kyo's father actually stood up from the bench and bowed deeply to Kyo and Die both, intoning a brief word of thanks to Die.

Kyo let Die lead him around ‘til he was finally facing the bench and staring at his parents. He sort of gaped in surprise, automatically bowing back to his father then grinning, his eyes flicking to his mother. 

Kyo's mother stood as well, bowing the same as her husband. "It's so good to see you two."

Kyo's father held out a simple box to Kyo before settling back down on the bench again. "I accept you as you are, son... and saw no better way to show it than this." He gestured to the package. "Open it."

Kyo took the box, peering at it for several moments before carefully unwrapping it. Inside, black fabric lay nestled amongst tissue paper. He carefully removed it, revealing traditional hakama, the symbolism immediately clear to him. 

Emotion welled up inside of him and he swallowed several times before he could speak. "Otou-san, I can't even begin to tell you how much this means." He clenched his jaw as he replaced the hakama in the box before bowing as deeply as he could while standing. "Thank you."

Die had to press the back of his hand against his lips to keep his emotions in check, looking slightly flushed and more than a little watery-eyed over the whole thing. Of course, he'd had some idea what was going to happen, but not the full extent of it. He'd received his own very thought-out apology from the man a few days earlier, just before the clock turned to his birthday, a very fitting present if he did say so himself.

Kyo's father crossed his legs at the knee and then offered a quiet, "We see you as a couple, and when you are to be wed, we will honor it as such."

Kyo looked from his father to his mother, who was dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief. He reached out to grab Die's hand, lacing their fingers. "Thank you. Having your approval means so much to me, to us."

"You never should have had to ask for it, Tooru," Kyo's father murmured. "I was foolish and too stuck in old ways."

Kyo's mom patted her husband's arm. "We were raised in a different time, and things are still hard and cruel at times, but I think you two will be happy no matter what." 

Kyo shook his head, wiping at his face with his free hand. He was overcome with emotion and found it difficult to speak, so he just nodded and bowed again, squeezing Die's hand tightly as he did.

Die gestured across the street toward the temple. "I think some time is needed in there. Care to join us?"

Kyo looked towards the temple then back to his parents, his lip pulled between his teeth. He gripped the box containing the hakama tightly. 

Kyo's mother smiled a gentle smile and shook her head. "You two go ahead; we'll stay here. But after I think a nice lunch is order?"

Die slid his arm around Kyo's waist, gently maneuvering him toward the temple. "Choose one of the ramen stalls, and meet there after we're done?"

Kyo smiled and offered them a wave, before turning and walking with Die, his heart singing. "Daisuke...did you have something to do with this?"

"Only with the orchestration of getting you here. Solely his idea, not mine." Die paused at the corner and then began to cross with the light.

Kyo hummed, walking in step with Die, still holding his hand. "I'm stunned....and touched."

"I got a call right before my birthday, and he apologized for how he'd treated me... us..., and it left me about equally as shell shocked. I can only imagine how it comes to you after all these years."

Kyo paused on the walkway, years of inner turmoil surfacing in his memories. He'd always only wanted to be accepted for who he was. To have that realized now, it seemed unreal, as though he would wake up in their hotel room any moment now and it will have been a dream. 

He bit his lip hard, clenching Die's hand. "Shell shocked...that's about right...," he murmured, his voice trembling faintly.

"Just breathe, Koi." Die led them up the path, past all the little shops and eateries, a small smile on his lips as he did so. "You're not gonna let that thing go, are you?"

Kyo took a breath then shook his head, clutching tightly to his parcel. "Not in a million years."

"That's what I thought." Die gently steered them through the gates and toward the temple, ducking under a few paper lanterns hung for the upcoming new year.

Kyo stepped into the temple, breathing in the scent of incense with a smile. When they arrived at the proper entrance, he removed his shoes and placed them and his parcel into a locker, taking the key with him. "Okay, I lied, I will put it down for this."

Die just smiled, taking Kyo's bag from his shoulder and putting it in the locker with his own and then shoving his shoes in on top before taking his own key. He followed after Kyo, allowing his lover to go first through the ritual.

Kyo moved first to light the provided incense, placing it in the urn then clasping his hands together, bowing. He stood there silently for a few moments then stepped aside, waiting on Die.

Die duplicated Kyo's actions, allowing himself to relax and center before he pressed his palms together and bowed, righting himself and stepping aside for the next person.

Kyo smiled at his lover then moved further into the temple, focusing his mind on the energies there. When they arrived in front of a large statue of the temple's Buddha, he once again pressed his hands together and bowed. He sank to his knees after, joining others that had come to meditate.

Die, for once, moved to settle beside his lover rather than simply waiting along the back wall as he usually did in such places. This time, he found it more appropriate to join with him on this.

Kyo, finding Die's actions to be telling, simply reached out and found his lover's hand, uncaring that anyone could see. He didn't break his breathing, continuing on with the same slow breaths he'd been taking.

Die's fingers entwined with Kyo's, and he settled in for as long as Kyo wanted to be here, doing his best to find his own rhythm of breath in the meantime.

Kyo lost himself to the ritual, the quiet atmosphere of the temple, the heady aroma of the incense and quiet toning of a bell somewhere. He meditated and prayed, asking the gods for their blessing in his life with Die and thanking them for what he'd already received.

For his part, Die simply centered himself and began to pass over, examine, and discard the myriad of thoughts that usually plagued him. It was, perhaps, beneficial to him on the whole, leveling him in a way that his panic attacks would be grateful he'd done.

Once Kyo had finished the first part of his meditation, he gently pressed his aura out against Die's, silently asking permission to share the same cosmic space.

It didn't take anything at all for Die to accept Kyo's aura as his own, he was open like the book, he always had been in a myriad of ways... and in that instant, it became starkly clear why he'd always been so close to Kyo and his emotions. Always taking them in as his own, accepting them and sorting them as though he never noticed the difference between them... and, perhaps, he didn't.

Kyo let out an unintended sigh as he and Die meshed together, the other's feelings washing over him. He could see, as if watching a screen, the direction of Die's thoughts. and he followed them, turning them over and finding the meaning, the essence of them. 

It was moments like this that affirmed to him that he and Die were always meant to be together. The universe would have found a way, no matter what.

Die honestly felt no different, simply finding the pieces of thoughts and emotions and continuing onward, filing them away methodically and carefully, with no mind as to whose they originally were, and no idea that half of them were likely not even his own at this point. Every once in a while, his fingers would twitch as he filed away something particularly meaningful.

Kyo remained motionless, his thoughts pouring out like a river now. It happened the last time they'd done this, and he couldn't and didn't want to stem the flow. Bad and good escaped and passed between them with no order.

Die finally found and identified something that wasn't his own, and he slowly became aware of what was actually happening. A little smile twitched his lips as he carefully examined the emotion and then filed it gingerly in amongst the variety of Kyo emotions he had found and known were not his own. He lightly squeezed Kyo's hand to let him know he knew now and then continued forward, examining and filing, careful to keep it interspersed with actual plaguing thoughts of his own so he'd deal with everything that he needed to.

As Die squeezed his hand, Kyo smiled softly, a sense of relief sliding through him. His emotions were tricky and tangled, and that Die could find them, sort them out, and understand even when they were negative was a miracle unto itself. He breathed out another sigh, probing a little deeper, searching for Die's darker depths, finding some and gently sorting through them.

Die could feel the moment Kyo probed into him, trying to find his own deep dark places and forking through them. He caught the cast-offs, the escape-ees and began to deal with the things that he'd not wanted to deal with at the time. A moment Kyo had passed out on stage and Die had been terrified something more had happened and couldn't even check if he'd been breathing, though he'd moved closer even though he knew he shouldn't have. How terrified he'd been until Kyo had come back on stage.

A panning review of his own stage performance and a ton of comments about how much of a talentless hack he was. And how much it had hurt after all his years of trying his entire best to be who he was. Overheard comments about how much weight he'd put on, and how it had only taken a record-breaking three minutes before he'd been in the bathroom, heaving his last meal out to the porcelain gods, unable to regain any sort of control over his own actions and drowning in hopelessness. And those were simply the cast-aways, the less significant chunks of what Kyo was delving around in. It would seem that bright, lovely Die held onto some deep-seated issues at his core that, in a way, he didn't even realize were entirely there.

Kyo stumbled over a particularly prominent batch of the thoughts he'd been searching and began going deeper into them. His heart clenched when he saw himself, unconscious on stage. He could feel the fear that Die had felt then and guilt tried to eat into him. He pushed it away for now, focusing on soothing Die, pushing his own version of the event against it. Too much pushing of his body, not enough sleep, and an overly hot stage had been the main cause. 

After he gave Die time to feel and see that, he moved to the next, his teeth gritting as anger well up inside of him. He'd, of course, heard similar things but they were simply untrue. To this, he showed Die how much joy his guitar could bring to him in private moments and to the fans that loyally stood on his side year after year. 

Finally, he reached the bottom and it was the deepest of all. His stomach rolled in psychosomatic response to Die's emotions. His heart ached for his lover, hating that anyone would dare talk about his weight when he was nearly too thin even now. He wrapped Die in a burst of unconditional love, silently telling him that even if he became Boo-sized, it wouldn't matter, ever.

Die could feel each thought fade slightly, events slipping in place around them and meshed within them that he couldn't quite explain, but instinctively knew where it was coming from. He squeezed Kyo's fingers again and then began to ease them away from the sore patch, unwilling to deal with any more of them today.

Kyo could feel Die leading away from the darkness, and he was fine with that, having begun to feel overwhelmed. Instead, he turned to another subject, something that had been on his mind a lot lately. He opened up and showed Die his physical desire, warmth pooling in his belly as soon as he opened that door, heat rising to his cheeks.

Within seconds Die was growing hard and right behind it came embarrassment due to where they were. He bit back the noise that wanted to rise from his throat and just bowed his body over more to hide it, obviously having been holding himself back for a while now.

Kyo could feel the fire burning within Die within an instant. He inhaled a bit too sharply and pulled back, fearing that they would both lose control there in the temple. With it, he let out an apology, having been unaware of just how much Die would return his need. He bit his lip, a shiver going through him as he took a breath, willing his body to calm down lest his thoughts be exposed to the other patrons.

Die decided he was glad he'd not taken off his jacket, sure that things were not going to calm down in that avenue any time soon. He untangled his fingers from Kyo and bowed. With quick movements, he pulled off his jacket and slid it in front of himself, folding it over his arm in a way that made it look like he was simply overly warm in the warm-ish room. Standing up, he kept the jacket in front of himself and couldn't help but be amused at the fact that this was twice they'd done nearly the same thing. He found his way around the small walkway back to the lockers and settled with the jacket in his lap, taking his time with their bags and his shoes.

Kyo let out a sigh as Die released his hand. He closed himself off then bowed. He stood and adjusted his track pants and shirt, using his jacket as coverage as well. He followed Die, a smile on his lips as he pulled his shoes back on. While Die was fussing with the laces of his boots, he went to the offering box and placed two large bills into it.

Die managed to get his bag on and then shoulder Kyo's as well before he stood up and moved over to the door to wait for Kyo.

Kyo joined Die at the door, smiling at him. "So, lunch with my parents..."

"Yeah, lunch..." Die laughed softly once they were down the stairs. "Thanks for that."

Kyo laughed softly, ducking his head. "Sorry, I didn't intend for it be quite so...intense."

"Oh, but it was!" Die shivered a bit. "Cold needs to kick in sometime down through here so I can put my jacket back on. Seriously.

Kyo chuckled softly then looked around, nodding at a public restroom. "You could always try pissing or just letting it hang in the cold..."

"Let's go with that." Die ducked into the restroom and headed into one of the stalls, putting the bags on the hook and then his jacket, unzipping and freeing himself with a soft sigh.

Kyo wandered in next to Die, breaking protocol and standing at the urinal beside him. He unzipped as well, peering down at his cock.

Die nearly laughed when Kyo chose the urinal right next to the stall he was in, the tiny waist high dividers forcing people not to do anything untoward in the stalls. The irony was not lost on him now with Kyo standing there gawking at him.

Kyo glanced up at Die and shot him a shit-eating grin. "Hi."

"Hey there, asshole." Die chuckled, leaning forward and doing his best to push his cock down and force himself to take a piss. When he finally started urinating, he sighed, feeling pleased.

Kyo snickered then focused on pissing, groaning lowly. "Asshole, hm?"

"More so if you keep on groaning like that. Nothing untoward on sacred grounds, man." He finished up and shook off, tucking back in and adjusting really well.

Kyo huffed softly, finishing up as well and making sure there were no remaining droplets before adjusting his pants. Satisfied that it didn't look too bad, he washed his hand and gathered up his hakama and bag. "I love you." 

Die chuckled, returning the sentiment and flushing before he went to get himself bundled back up and his bag picked up. Then he washed his hands and followed after Kyo, stepping back outside. Pulling out his phone, he shot off a quick text to see where they were meeting for lunch, though he honestly was far more antsy than he should have been.

Kyo was smiling as they walked along, uncaring if anyone saw. He paused to snap a picture of a stray cat with his phone, finding its position on the low brick wall adorable. "Where are we meeting them?"

"Actually, they asked for a few hours... so, uh, nowhere yet?" Die glanced at Kyo, watching him take the photo of the cat and then grinning to himself at the fact that he'd made Kyo a cat person.

Kyo raised an eyebrow at that, wondering what his parents could be doing that would cause them to delay lunch. "I guess that makes it a dinner date then..." He walked a bit more then paused, licking his lips. "So if we have a few hours...we could take advantage...."

"Yes, just yes. Figure it out and yes." Die shot Kyo a look that clearly showed just how uncomfortable he really was and then took a deep breath and concealed it again.

Kyo peered at Die for a few moments then smirked. "I know just the place..." With that, he took off at a brisk walk, heading for the main road to hail a cab.

Die trailed along after Kyo, walking briskly not really a thing that was going to happen with his dick rubbing against the inside of his jeans, the head having escaped his underwear. He shoved his hands into his pockets and tried to push his thumbs outward a bit to give a bit of room and rushed his steps as much as he could.

Kyo waited for Die to catch up then slid into the taxi, giving a street name but not address to the driver. He settled back in the seat and looked over at Die, a smirk on his lips. "Issues?"

"Just a few," Die returned, settling back in his seat and doing his best not to look half as anxious as he was. He plopped his bag in his lap, careful to avoid his rather obvious boner and chewed the inside of his cheek a bit, trying to decide if he'd do well to adjust now or leave it be.

Kyo snuck a squeeze to Die's thigh, his fingers slipping upward a bit before retreating. He let out a soft huff of breath, pushing his hips up subtly. He was glad he'd worn loose pants, his discomfort not as great as Die's obviously was. 

It took less than 10 minutes for them to get to their destination. He quickly paid the driver then slid out, waiting for Die to join him, his eyes finding the love hotel he'd chosen just a block or so ahead.

Die did his best not to respond, just thanking the driver and getting out, making sure his bag was fashionably in the way of his boner for the time being and then came to stand next to Kyo on the curb. "Lead on."

Kyo chuckled and started walking, his pace slower now. He slipped into the stance he used when he didn't want to be seen, his shoulders hunched and head down. "Just a bit ahead," he offered to Die, not looking at him as he walked.

Die pushed his sunglasses on and did his best to just appear normal. But he knew, if nothing else, people would notice him if they knew who he was. Usually, at least, they were left alone for the most part, and he just hoped that today would continue to be like that for them. The last thing he wanted was the mood killed in such a way.

Fortunately, no one harassed them on their way, something Kyo was quite thankful for as he finally turned down an alley. He came to a stop in front of a nondescript pair of doors, waiting on Die before pushing them open and stepping inside. 

He glanced around then headed for the kiosk standing in the lobby, going about and selecting a simple room, paying then receiving his key card. He turned and grinned at Die, waving it at him. "Third floor. We have it for four hours."

Die followed Kyo inside, relaxing a bit once the door was closed behind him. He waited for a few moments while Kyo collected the room and everything and then offered him a smile, heading for the elevator bank and pressing the up arrow. He chuckled then. "That arrow's not the only thing pointing up."

Kyo chuckled, reaching to grope himself for a moment, relatively certain of their privacy now. "Mm, definitely not." He bounced from foot to foot until the elevator opened up then stepped onto it, quickly pressing the button for the third floor.

Die stepped into the elevator as well and then moved the bag out of the way, heaving out a sigh of relief at not having it pushing at his dick anymore. "Fuckin popped out of my underwear before we ever left the shrine. I'm dying over here. Pure agony."

Kyo glanced down at the tent in Die's pants, smirking. "I'll make it all better once we get into the room...," he promised, licking his lips. 

In just a moment, they arrived on the third floor, the doors opening with a soft whoosh. He stepped out, read the sign to see which direction to go and headed down the hallway.

Die choked out, "That better be a promise for head, because otherwise you are a devil for licking your lips like that." He followed out of the elevator and along the hallway, hearing a few distinct sounds within the rooms along the hallway, a smirk on his lips at just how much sex was happening in this building right then.

Kyo just grinned, having meant exactly that. He paused in front of the correct room and slipped the key into the slot, hearing the lock click over. He turned the handle and stepped in, looking around at the room. 

It was tastefully done in hues of blue and grey with a large bed in the center and not much else other than a table with several bottles of water and a basket with condoms and packets of lube. There was a bathroom as well with a shower and tub. 

He slipped out of his shoes then dropped his bag and hakama by the table before turning to peer at Die, his eyes nearly predatory. "Hurry the fuck up, and get your shoes off so I can deep throat you."

Die stepped in behind Kyo, closing the door and immediately starting to dump his bag and jacket on the chair next to the door. He reached back and flicked the master key bolt and then unzipped his pants, freeing his cock with a relieved sigh before he bent down to deal with his shoes.

Kyo chuckled lowly, moving over to sit on the edge of the bed, tugging his shirt off while he waited. "It's been too fucking long. I need to taste you," he murmured out, his hand going to grasp his cock for a moment, a groan escaping him.

Die popped up after a moment and moved to stand in front of Kyo, his hand coming to stroke over the back of his lover's hair. He bent down and tasted his lips for just a moment, a sweet, affectionate kiss before he yanked his head back and gave him one of the most sexual looks he'd ever turned on Kyo before. "Suck me off. Fucking gag on it."

Kyo relished the moment of tenderness but all out moaned as soon as Die turned on him. The fire in his lover's eyes only fueled his own, his breath quickening as he slid from the bed to his knees. "Don't hold back," he murmured. 

He reached out to grasp Die's hips, leaning in to lick the head of his cock before taking him into his mouth, sliding down on him.

"Fuck," Die hissed out as his cock slid into Kyo's mouth. Now that was relief if he'd ever felt it. His mouth opened slightly and his eyes closed as he just let Kyo work on it for a minute or so. And then, abruptly, his hips surged forward, pushing his cock all the way into Kyo's mouth until his pubic hair was pushing against Kyo's lips and he grunted, holding Kyo's head in place with a fistful of hair.

Kyo groaned as Die shoved his cock the full way into his mouth and throat, gagging slightly then recovering as he swallowed around the length of him. He flicked his eyes up to Die's face, his fingertips digging into the other's hipbones as he put up a mock fight against his hand, relishing the slight pain of having his hair pulled.

Die watched the sparkle in his lover's eyes, knowing they were fine because their known signals to one another hadn't been used. He wet his lips as he began to fuck Kyo's mouth, his own breathing incredibly loud to his ears as he moved.

Kyo continued to watch Die's face as the other fucked his mouth. He used his tongue to press against the underside of Die's cock, groaning around him. 

Before long, he had his hand in his own pants, wrapped around his throbbing cock.

"Don't, baby; don't touch yourself yet." Die smirked down at him, rubbing his hand through his hair and then wrenching it back and wetting his lips.

Kyo hissed as Die yanked on his hair, pulling his head off his cock. He pulled his hand away from himself with great effort and settled it on the other's hips, squeezing harshly.

Die leaned down again and kissed Kyo's lips delicately, a gentle juxtapose to their other actions. Stepping back, he breathed out, "Stay there." Within moments, he had his pants off and his shirt over his head. He slid onto the very edge of the bed and spread his legs, laying himself out over the bed though his knees were still bent and his ass was in the air. "Put that beautiful mouth to another use."

Kyo returned the kiss with passion then watched as Die stripped, raking his eyes over his lover's body. 

When Die moved onto the bed and presented his ass to him, he grinned. "Gladly," he replied, taking a moment to stand and strip out of his pants before positioning himself between Die's thighs. 

He flicked his eyes up to the other's face then lowered his head, snaking his tongue out to run over puckered skin. He teased for a moment, barely touching Die then switched to running the flat of his tongue over his hole, moaning as he did.

Die watched from the side for a few moments and then pushed his face against the comforter, pushing his ass back toward Kyo. "Harder," he hissed out.

Kyo shifted, bringing his hand down to pull Die open more, swirling his tongue against his entrance. In another a moment, he started pushing his tongue into Die's body, wriggling it inside him further and further.

"Ah yeah, just like that!" Die arched his back, panting as Kyo tongued his hole. He made some rather interesting noises, utterly in heaven with what the other was doing to him right then.

The vocalist groaned softly, reaching up to fondle Die's sac as he ate his ass hole, making sure to make plenty of noise as he did. He moved his tongue up to brush over Die's taint then lathe over his balls before returning to his hole, fucking him with it as well as he could.

Die let out a keening sound when Kyo went to lick his taint, eagerly pushing back, wanting more where that came from. His fists clung to the comforter and he moaned throatily with each movement of Kyo's tongue.

Kyo responded to Die's reactions, once again moving up to tongue his taint, sliding his finger into his entrance instead.

"Ah yeah, baby, right there." Die squirmed a bit again and then settled, letting Kyo lick over the sensitive skin there, panting faintly. "Wanna get it pierced so you'll fuckin' play with it all the time." He groaned loudly.

The idea of Die having his taint pierced made Kyo's cock twitch and he moaned his approval loudly. "That would be a fucking fantastic idea," he growled out before going back lap at the skin there, imagining a barbell that he could toy with.

Die's rear wiggled again and he breathed out, "Nip it." The way he said it started off strong, like a command, but dipped into request as he ended the simple words, his breath wavering at the end as he thought of how it would feel.

Kyo smirked at the tremble in Die's voice, loving the way the other was breaking under his own pleasure. He pushed his finger into him a few times before following the would-be command, grazing his teeth over the area then biting gently.

Die whimpered and then let out a few gasping cut-off moans before he shuddered and cum pulsed out of his cock across the bedsheets. "Fuckin' put it in me," he hissed out, barely managing to get the words out in the midst of his orgasm.

Kyo lifted his head to watch Die as he came, a self-satisfied smirk on his face. He licked his lips then grabbed up a packet of lube he'd acquired from the provided basket, ripping it open and squirting it on his dick. "You're so demanding..." 

He shifted between Die's legs, spreading them open and positioning himself before thrusting into him in one go, a moan spilling from his lips. "Fuck!" Without waiting, he started thrusting into Die, his pace nearly frantic.

Die's moan made it clear just how much he liked having Kyo's dick inside him like this. He pushed back against him and then whined softly, settling so he could be fucked good and hard, his cock brushing the bed with each thrust, running through the puddle of cum he'd just left there.

Kyo grasped Die's hips, holding on tight enough to bruise as he fucked into him, skin slapping against skin. "Needed you...so bad," he panted out, hunching over Die's body to push into him deeper.

"Ah god," Die panted out, pushing his face into the blankets again as Kyo fucked him hard. "Fuckin' use my asshole."

Kyo grunted and slapped Die's ass hard before shifting back, changing angles slightly then pushing into him again. He used Die's hip as a handle, thrusting into him with wild abandon, reaching for his pleasure.

Beneath him, Die was in utter bliss, never happier to have Kyo fucking him good and hard like this. He wet his lips and just lay there, soaking it all up, his breathing rough and his cock still hard.

Kyo finally stopped and pulled out, swatting Die's ass as he did. "Turn over, I want to see your face as I fill you with my cum."

Die growled, but he did as he was asked, rolling over and spreading his legs, displaying the fact that his cock was hard as a rock still. "Come fuck me, and get your rocks off then."

Kyo smirked at Die's attitude, reaching out to wrap his fingers around his lover's cock. "Impatient..."

Die shoved himself up a bit and got hold of Kyo's hair again, pulling him down a bit with him. "We didn't change who was in charge here. Now put your cock back in my ass."

The vocalist hissed and stared at Die with narrowed eyes for a moment. He debated putting up a fuss, but then decided he was far too close to cumming to do so. Instead, he shifted back between Die's legs, slamming into him without warning and starting to fuck him for all he was worth.

Die's body bucked and arched, his head thrown back and his muscles straining as he pushed up into Kyo's touch and strained toward his pounding cock. "God you feel so fuckin' good!"

Kyo groaned in response, dropping his head against Die's shoulder as he fucked him, his thrusts growing erratic. After another few moments, he let out a cry as he started cumming, his body shuddering as he shot his load into Die. "Fuck!"

Die shifted and then settled when he felt Kyo cumming. "That's right, baby, fuckin' cum for me." He ground down on him as he spurted, watching Kyo's face. "Fill me up with your cum, and then you can lick it all right back out."

Kyo's eyes widened a bit at that proposition, his cock twitching faintly within Die's body. He let out another moan as the last spurt of cum left him, another shiver going down his spine. "Fuck, Die..."

Once Die was sure Kyo was done cumming, he pushed him lightly. "Put your mouth against my hole."

Kyo eased himself out of Die and stared down at him, licking his lips. "Make me," he said quietly, unable to resist.

Die shoved the top of Kyo's head down without remorse. "I said put your mouth against my fuckin' asshole. Now do it."

Kyo grunted and pulled away slightly. "And I said fucking make me..."

Die shifted, his legs coming up around Kyo's shoulders and he shoved his face against his ass, holding his head still with one hand. "Use your mouth, whore."

Kyo held back a smirk as he got exactly what he'd wanted. Instead he groaned and finally relented, parting his lips to begin licking his own cum from Die.

Die pushed his mouth against him and then pushed a little, cum dripping back out of his asshole. "That's right, swallow it."

Kyo squirmed for Die's benefit, lapping up the cum and swallowing it as commanded. He gripped the sheets in his hands, whimpering against Die.

"That's right; now put your mouth back on my cock, and take my next load." He pulled his head up and then let him go so he could do as he asked if he wanted. But he didn't move his legs from his shoulders, holding him captured. "Don't move, just put your mouth on it and stay still."

Kyo very nearly forgot he was protesting when Die told him to take his cock. He remembered at the last moment and just sat there, bucking against the other's legs a bit.

Die grabbed his head and his dick with his other hand, struggling to sit up like this, and shoved his dick in Kyo's mouth. He let go of his dick and moved to a more comfortable position, just resting with his dick in Kyo's mouth, studying the other while he held him on his cock.

Kyo groaned as Die forced him on his dick. He stared up at him for a few seconds then lightly closed his teeth around his cock. It wasn't nearly enough to hurt but it was a small act of rebellion and if his mouth hadn't been full of cock, he'd have smirked.

Die just let him do it, running his hand through his hair a few times, feeling the sweat there and groaning because of it. He shifted a little and arched his hips, muscles shifting as he strained for it. "I'm gonna show you how much I love your mouth."

Kyo let out a grunt, swallowing around Die's dick, shifting one hand to rest on his lover's thigh.

Die continued stroking over Kyo's hair and then grabbed it, taking in a shaky breath and then moaning in such a gorgeous way. Heat lanced through his body and then he moaned loudly, his fingers holding tight to Kyo's hair as he began to shoot his load right into Kyo's mouth from little more than his lover's mouth being around his dick. "Spit it out on me and then lick it off," he panted out, watching Kyo attentively, even as he was still spurting.

Kyo shuddered at Die's moan, loving the way it sounded. He very nearly swallowed Die's offering but stopped as the other told him to spit it out. He lifted his head and let it dribble out over his lips and down his chin to Die's cock before he bent back down and lapped it back up, slurping loudly.

"God yeah... swallow it this time." Die's cock strained again when Kyo started licking it, and Die panted, whimpering, and pushing up toward him until he got it in his mouth and began fucking quickly up into it. "Ah yeah... gonna.... one more. Fuck, baby."

Kyo did as he was asked, swallowing Die's cum. When his lover announced he was going to cum again, he moaned, taking his cock and sucking it as Die fuck up into his mouth.

It only took a few seconds before Die's breath caught, and relief surged through him as he started to cum, this time truly satisfying. It wasn't a lot of cum, but the orgasm itself was hard and quick, enough to leave his muscles trembling, just the way he liked them best.

Kyo swallowed what little bit Die had to offer then licked over the head of his cock for a moment before lifting up and out of the position Die had forced him into. He gazed down at his lover, smirking as he licked his lips, his hand going to stroke over his stomach.

Die just lay there for a moment and then gave Kyo a naughty look before he rolled over onto his stomach and shimmied around for a moment. "We're allowed to do whatever we want, right?"

Kyo flopped down beside Die, pushing a hand through his hair. "Mmn, yeah...within reason...they clean the hell out of these rooms after each use."

Die debated it for a moment and then just curled up on the bed. He'd do something in a minute and see if Kyo noticed or not and how long he'd get away with it. "Just lay with me for a few."

Kyo hummed and shifted behind Die, curling against him and pushing his face against his neck.

For a while, Die just lay there and then he slowly let a tiny squirt of pee out into the bedsheets beneath him, stopping after that tiny bit, just letting his dick feel the warmth of it in the sheets. He'd drank a lot of water, so it didn't stink. He couldn't even tell he'd done it by that alone and it wasn't running back toward Kyo. His pulse picked up a little, excitement at doing something he normally didn't without prompting filtering through him.

Kyo remained unaware of Die's indiscretion for the moment, his eyes closed as he nuzzled his lover. He idly stroked his hand over Die's side, just resting.

Die waited a little bit longer and then let out another short spray of piss, still managing to keep it contained. He scrunched a bit more of the covers around his cock in guise of needing to move around to get comfortable again and then really let a powerful spray loose into the comforter, knowing it would soak it all up. He stopped right after that, his heart pounding, still not feeling it leak back toward Kyo or anything that would give him away just yet.

Kyo squirmed around when Die shifted, tugging a corner of comforter over his hip to ward a slight chill. He yawned and stretched, flopping his arm over Die, his hand coming dangerously near landing in the piss without his knowledge.

Die stared at Kyo's hand, licking his lips at how close he was to being found out. He shivered slightly, though it was utterly out of the thrill and not at all to do with the chill in the room. He pressed the blanket over his cock and began to let his urine seep out of his cock, just a thin stream that he didn't stop, but small enough it'd soak in rather quickly rather than puddling. His cock and balls were wet with his own piss, and before long he was excited enough he couldn't help but start going full-force, urinating hard enough he could just barely hear it hitting the drenched comforter in front of the head of his cock. His hips pushed forward as the last spray of piss came out of his now aching length and he grabbed Kyo's hand, shoving it down over the head of his prick as he strained and then grunted, cum splashing across Kyo's fingers a second later as Die moaned like a fucking porn star.

Kyo had almost dozed off when Die grabbed his hand, waking him back up as he found himself touching wet warmth. As Die came over his fingers, he surmised what had happened and groaned at the sheer debauchery of it. "Hnng, I see someone's been naughty..." 

The idea of it turned him on and soon, his cock was hardening again as he imagined Die just going about pissing in the bed like that.

"So good," Die breathed out, pushing Kyo's hand against his prick and rubbing it there as he pushed out the last few trickles of his piss. "Come on, fuck me in my mess, baby. I know my making a mess turns you on."

Kyo couldn't deny that in the least. He shifted a bit, rubbing his length against Die's ass, getting himself fully worked up again. "You drive me so fucking wild, Die."

"It felt so good... so dirty and you didn't know at all until I showed you. I pissed the whole fuckin bed, and you had no idea." Die was squirming back against Kyo now, ready to be fucked hard again. "God, I want to be used again. Just fill me with your cum, and piss whenever you want. I have one job for the next few hours. Just put it in me when it wants out. Please, oh god, please."

Kyo felt electricity sparking through him at the way Die was talking, everything about setting his nerves on fire. "Christ, Die." 

He humped against Die's ass for a few more minutes then shifted a bit, finding the right angle. He grunted when the head of his dick popped into Die's hole, pulling it back out then pushing in again, then time sliding in fully. He drew his knee up to get better leverage then began fucking Die, his hand pressing in his lover's mess, fueling him on.

"Ah yeah, god! Fuck my ass!" Die shoved the wet comforter against his crotch and humped at it while Kyo fucked him from behind. "I'm on fire; god, fuck me, your cock feels so good!" Die let out a keening whine and began to struggle to fuck himself back on Kyo's dick, unable to stay still.

Kyo complied, thrusting into Die as hard as he could in the position he was in. He leaned over him, pressing his face to his neck, kissing then biting the skin harshly.

"Can't even think," Die hissed out, still jerking around and trying to fuck into the comforter and against Kyo at the same time. "God why am I so horny!" He strained and then peed a little more, panting after the few drops had left him, his ass clenching around Kyo as he urinated.

Kyo didn't have an answer for Die as he was having his own issues in thinking. He growled out lowly, pushing harder into Die as the other's inner walls clenched around him. "Don't have...an answer," he grunted out. 

He finally decided he needed more and pulled out of Die. He pushed him over onto his stomach and yanked his hips up, slamming back into his body once he was satisfied with the positon.

Die rolled over with Kyo's insistent yanks and lay there in the mostly dry area of the bed watching Kyo move over him, pounding into his body. He moved his legs up and just rolled with it, letting Kyo fuck him hard, staring up at him half in a daze. "I pissed the bed," he finally breathed out again.

Kyo huffed out a breath, sliding out half way then thrusting in again hard. "Yes, you did; you fucking pissed the bed, then jizzed in it."

Die strained a little again, a few more dribbles of pee coming out of his cock as he watched it. "I want to pee more, but I can't." He pushed his hips up hard and grunted, straining for it until a thin stream came out for a second or two and then was done.

Kyo snorted, slowing down a bit, reining in the urgency. "Nothing I can do about that, darlin’," he offered, rolling his hips against Die's, groaning softly.

"Don't stop... god, don't stop. Fuck me, and fill me." Die whimpered a little, bringing his legs back up and giving Kyo better access to his hole.

Kyo smirked, picking up the speed again, thrusting deep into Die's body. "I love it when you beg, when you're desperate...," he murmured, hunching over Die as he fucked him.

Die whined and rolled his hips upward, letting Kyo feel how desperate he was to have this happen right then. His face was flushed, and he looked utterly debauched.

Kyo groaned, picking up the pace, his breath coming in pants. He fucked Die hard and fast for a few minutes then stilled, letting out a soft cry as he started to cum, once more filling up his lover's passage. "Die!"

Die deflated against the bed the moment Kyo came, a small smile on his face as he lay there, looking for all the world like the cat who'd gotten the cream before anyone else.

Kyo stayed where he was for a few moments, trembling faintly. He ran his eyes over his lover's body, soaking up the scene with a smile. Finally, he pulled out slowly and flopped down next to Die, nearly boneless. "You are...amazing..."

Grunting, Die rolled toward Kyo and away from his cooling piss. "Pure debauchery, darling."

Kyo reached out to grasp Die's hand, huffing out a laugh. "Mm, definitely."

"I can't really believe I just did that." Die chuckled and then reached down to lightly palm Kyo's spent length. "I like touching your dick when it's soft... I know that's probably strange, but I do."

Kyo laughed then shivered, watching Die's hand on his still slightly sensitive cock. "Mm, I'm not going to complain..."

"Good... because it feels nice." Die lightly played with Kyo's foreskin and then ran his fingers over the piercing before sliding his foreskin back behind the head of his dick and just resting his palm over the whole thing. "Mmm... warm, sticky, Kyo cock."

Kyo's cock gave a slight twitch as Die fondled it. He huffed out a quiet sound then chuckled. "I prefer hot, hard Kyo cock."

"Yes, well, I love them both." Die patted him lightly and then rolled right over the top of him and padded off toward the bathroom. "Time to get un-sticky."

Kyo grunted then shifted off of the bed, following Die. "Sounds like a great plan to me."


	82. Chapter 82

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Thinking Out Loud by Ed Sheeran is the song Die uses](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lp-EO5I60KA)

After all the hullabaloo of the past few weeks, Die's issues with his stomach and anxiety due to the holidays and their general business with everything going on around them, Die felt it was entirely overdue to do something romantic and horribly over the top for Kyo. As such, he found the perfect thing and spent an entire week doing his best to perfect it, despite it being really difficult given language barriers and a million other things.

When the day finally rolled around, Die got up early, making crepes with strawberries and kiwi, going to all the trouble to get actual milk in their house, and then setting out breakfast on the table.

He made his way back upstairs, rushing across the landing and into the bedroom, flopping half over Kyo and peering down at him with a huge grin. "Wake up, precious."

Kyo had been sound asleep, having missed Die getting up and the sounds and smells of cooking that likely filtered up to their bedroom. As such, when Die flopped onto him, he let out a startled "oof" and opened his eyes, squinting at his lover for a moment before smiling. "Good morning..."

"Aww, someone's in a good mood." Die leaned in and kissed the tip of Kyo's nose before pulling back and shoveling the covers off his lover, sliding over him and straddling his hips as he stared down at him. He let a grin spread over his face. "There's breakfast for any good-willed persons in this home!"

Kyo protested the removal of his covers, grappling for them for a moment before Die settled atop him. He peered up at the other, his hands rubbing over his thighs as he wondered about his extremely cheery mood. "Breakfast?" he questioned, his stomach responding to the idea of food with a rumble.

"Indeed. I made it from scratch, and I may be just a bit cocky about it." Die winked and then rolled off of Kyo. "Take a piss and meet me back downstairs." After all, he didn't want to leave the food hanging out alone for too long.

Kyo huffed out a laugh and sat up as Die rolled off him. He scrubbed his hands over his face then pushed himself out of bed, yawning widely as he made his way to the bathroom. After he'd taken care of emptying his bladder and washing his face, he made his way downstairs to the kitchen, another smile gracing his lips as he spotted the beautifully done crepes. "Why so much trouble, Koi?"

"Because you deserve all the fuss in the world, that's why," Die responded as he placed the milk glasses on the table. "Trust me, you do." He smiled warmly at the other and then pulled out his chair for him, gesturing for him to sit.

Kyo stared at the partial redhead for a moment, his head tilted. He wasn't sure what had gotten into the other, but it made him happy to see Die so chipper. He settled into his chair, catching Die's hand and kissing the top of it before releasing him. "If you say so, darling..."

Die smiled in return, bustling over to his own chair and settling down, immediately digging into the crepes. "Oh wow... I can say so, I think I did a damn good job."

Kyo waited for Die to start before taking his first bite. He let the moan of appreciation speak for itself as he started eating the wonderfully done crepes. "Mmhmm," was all he could manage as he ate, pausing only to wash it down with some milk.

Die chowed right through his own plate of food and then made his way through his glass of milk in what appeared to be record time. He even went back and grabbed the last crepe and plopped it on his plate, pouring a third of a glass of milk and then settling down, mopping his crepe around in the strawberry juice.

Kyo ate slower than Die but smile nearly the whole time, glad his lover was eating so well. He finished up finally, running his finger through the remaining juices on his plate and licking it off before draining his milk. "Wow, that was absolutely amazing, Die. Thank you."

Die beamed at him as he put his fork down, leaning back and patting his belly. "I rented a movie for you... any guesses?"

Kyo blinked and reached up to run a hand over his faintly scratchy chin. "Er...not a clue, actually." He laughed and gave Die a sheepish grin. "My brain is still trying to process that amazing meal."

"The one Star Wars movie you don't have!" Die grinned. "I was going to buy it, but they were out of Blu-ray, and I thought DVDs at this point were... pointless."

Kyo couldn't help but smile in delight at that. He left his seat and moved over to Die, leaning down to kiss him on his strawberry flavored lips. "I assume that's what you want to spend the day doing then?"

"Yes, it is, indeed. I will clean up the kitchen while you get comfy, and then it is movie time."

Kyo pursed his lips a bit. "I thought I'd clean up the kitchen, since you cooked and are being amazing in general..."

"Nope, not happening. Go sit your cute little ass down somewhere, and be comfortable." Die made a shooing motion with his hands.

The vocalist debated arguing it but decided not to, letting Die have his way. "If you insist..." He left the kitchen and made his way to the living room. After grabbing a couple of throws and all of the pillows, he made a nest on the couch and settled into it, leaving plenty of room for Die.

Die made quick work of the kitchen, loading up the dishwasher and cleaning down the counters, table, and stove. Once he was done, he brought in two bottles of water and the tin of holiday popcorn, settling them on the table and then finding room for himself in Kyo's nest, picking up the remote and turning on the TV, pressing play on the Blu-ray player since it was already all queued up.

Kyo grinned when Die settled into the nest, shifting over to press against his side. He leaned up and kissed the other's cheek before focusing on the screen, his hand resting on Die's leg.

Die watched as the screen turned black and the words began to scroll, giving a small obligatory clap and then settling down again.

Kyo chuckled, adding his own clap then replacing his hand on Die's leg. The movie got started, and he became enthralled in it, despite having seen it already.

Die watched with a certain amount of peripheral interest, though at some point Snow came to snuggle in the blankets and his attention turned mostly to his cat, rubbing her belly and cooing softly every once in a while during louder scenes so he wouldn't disturb the movie with it.

Kyo shifted throughout the movie, eventually ending up with his head mostly in Die's lap. His hand stretched out to pet Snow's belly once in a while, a smile on his lips at Die's supposed covert cooing.

Once the movie was done, Die shifted and grabbed his water bottle, draining half of it and then shifting himself out from under Kyo, shifting Snow off the couch gently. Once he was standing, he cleared his throat. "If you'd follow me upstairs, that would be... perfect."

Kyo sat up when Die stood, following suit in getting a drink of water. He rubbed his eyes and nodded, reaching to grab a handful of caramel popcorn. He stuffed it into his mouth and picked up his water, moving to follow Die as he chewed, curiosity shining in his eyes.

Die mounted the stairs and once upstairs, moved to his acoustic, picking it up and then settling on a chair. He moved the gorgeous red beast over his lap. He picked up a guitar pick. After clearing his throat, he began to strum out the rhythm.

"When your legs don't work like they used to before... and I can't sweep you off your feet," Die wetted his lips and then closed his eyes, rocking slightly into the rhythm he was playing, "Will your mouth still remember the taste of my love? Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks?"

Kyo stopped in front of Die as he settled into a chair with his guitar. He studied him as he began to play an unfamiliar, slow tune. Die began to sing, surprising Kyo to the point that he almost missed the lyrics and their meaning. When they started sinking in, he smiled softly, warmth blooming in his chest.

The unfamiliar English rolled off Die's tongue surprisingly well given the circumstance. All of his practice had paid off, it seemed. He continued, his voice carrying a slight undertone to it that was all Die and nothing like the original. "And darling, I will be lovin' you until we're seventy. And baby, my heart could still fall as hard as twenty three." He added a flourish to the guitar and then continued. "And I'm thinkin' 'bout how people fall in love... in the most mysterious ways. Maybe," he came away from the guitar and reached out toward Kyo, barely grazing his hand, "just a touch of a hand," his fingers went back to the strings to keep playing. His eyes opened and he watched Kyo, a smile on his lips. "Oh me? I fall in love with you every single day... and I just wanna tell you, I am."

While Kyo struggled somewhat to catch all of the English Die was singing, most of it stuck, and the lyrics continued to make him smile, his heart swelling. He moved closer to his lover, his bottom lip pulled between his teeth as his eyes prickled the slightest bit.

"So honey now," Die's voice cut at the end, something reminiscent of Kyo's own vocalizations in his manner of singing this song. "Take me in your lovin' arms." Die leaned toward Kyo, his eyes on his lover's own. "Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars." He stood and leaned toward Kyo. "Place your head on my beatin' heart. I'm thinkin' out loud that maybe... we found love right where we are."

He cut off the guitar and just sang for a moment, his voice crystal clear. "When my hair's all gone white and my memory fades," his hand floated through the air in a gentle motion. "And the crowds don't remember my name. When my hands," he held out the hand with the pick, "don't play the strings the same way." He whispered out, "I know you will still love me the same."

The vocalist swallowed thickly as Die continued, an overwhelming feeling welling up inside of him. He didn't know where Die had found the song, but it was as if it had been written just for them. When the guitar was out of the way, he stepped forward, catching Die's face in his hands, his lips trembling slightly as he leaned up to press them against the other's. "Daisuke..."

Die let Kyo kiss him and then whispered softly, "'Cause honey, your soul can never grow old; it's evergreen. An' baby, your smile's forever in my mind and memory." He put down the guitar and pulled Kyo into his arms, pushing one hand into his hair and quietly singing to him as he held him close.

"I'm thinkin' 'bout how people fall in love... in mysterious ways. An' maybe it's all part of a plan." He pressed his cheek to Kyo's own. "I'll just keep making the same mistakes... just hoping you'll understand."

Kyo wrapped his arms tight around Die, holding on for dear life as the other sang in his ear. He could no longer hold back the tears that welled up in his eyes and they tracked down his face, dripping onto Die's shirt as emotions overwhelmed him.

Die's voice rose as he held Kyo tight in his arms. "But baby, now! Take me into your lovin' arms and kiss me under the light of a thousand stars." His voice dipped into something soft and deeper than how he'd usually sing. "Place your head on my beatin' heart. I'm thinkin' out loud, that maybe... we found love right where we are."

He twirled Kyo around and settled him into his chair, picking up his guitar again and kneeling in front of him, strumming out the next part, the chords powerful and determined. "So baby, now. Take me into your loving arms an' kiss me under the light of, a thousand stars. Oh darlin', place your head on my beatin' heart," he held the note for a moment and then breathed out, "I'm thinkin' out loud, that maybe, we found love right where we are. Oh maybe... we found love, right where we are." He let the notes fade out and whispered, "And we found love, right where we are."

Kyo let Die twirl him around, quickly going to wipe the moisture from his face as he settled in the chair. He gazed down at his lover while the other continued his song, unable to do anything other than that.

Die slid the guitar to the side and then smiled softly at his lover, taking his hands in his own. "Baby, I love you, and sometimes I don't feel like I do enough to show you just how much I care. So... this was for you. I heard the song and couldn't help but think it was perfect."

Kyo squeezed Die's hands hard, swallowing a few times to get control of himself. "Ah Die....you just being here with me is enough."

Chuckling, Die grinned at him and then murmured, "Yeah, but you can't deny having a song sung to you is just... amazingly romantic, right?"

Kyo let out a watery laugh and tugged Die forward, wanting him closer. "That was the most amazing thing I've ever had done for me, Koi."

"Only bad thing..." Die grinned at him, "Next time I have to top myself."

Kyo laughed and just slid into the floor, kneeling in front of Die. He wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed him hard. "No, Koi, _I_ have to top you."

"I accept; where shall we do it at?" Die burst out laughing a few seconds later.

Kyo snorted and pushed Die back onto the ground, hovering above him and leaning in to kiss him once more. "Ever the perv," he said with a grin.

"You're the one who said top me." Die sat there, grinning up at him and then flopped his arms back and closed his eyes. "Mmm... you're mine forever, darling."

Kyo chuckled then shifted to lie beside Die, nuzzling his neck. "Of course, I wouldn't have it any other way." He found Die's hand and squeezed tightly. "I love you my Koi."


	83. Chapter 83

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Schedule-wise please be aware this was written over 2 years ago, so it's not "now" like it was when it was written. This is when Die did the reprise of YakanDaiGaku for one night involving all the fans.  
> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Nerves... somehow there were still nerves involved in this for Die. No matter how much he wasn't supposed to be nervous after all these years working with crowd after crowd, standing in front of tons of people on a regular basis.... he still was. He shifted from one foot to the other, wringing his hands at his sides for a few seconds before squaring his shoulders and coming in on Yakan's cue. 

People clapped for him, and he glanced out over the audience of the YakanDaiGaku vacation trip, feeling his temperature rise ever so slightly. His pulse sped up and he pursed his lips as he made his way across the room toward Yakan. Outwardly, he did his best to look cool, confident, in control. He used the powerful stride he did when he needed that extra boost, and he arrived at Yakan's side in record time. He looked out over the audience again, responding to Yakan with an ease he was glad was still there with someone he'd befriended quite easily during their shows in the past. So many people....

Amidst the crowd of fangirls, Kyo fidgeted with his gloves for about the hundredth time that day. He readjusted the slightly tinted glasses and settled back, watching as Die came out onto the stage. So far, he had managed to go unnoticed throughout the trip. Neither Die nor the fans had discovered his secret, and it filled him with a sort of glee. Of course, he had Yakan's help with his ruse, and whenever things got to be too rowdy, he'd easily slip away behind the scenes. Now, he sat at a table with the only other guys, his finger tugging the neck of his turtleneck up a bit higher as he watched Die perform a toast.

Die stared at the beer in the glass as though it were foreign to him for a few moments after receiving it. He'd purposely asked to be served one he used to like but had had a bad experience with so that he wouldn't get any ideas about being drunk like he had a few public shows with Yakan in the past. Nope, he was going to be on his best behavior this time.

He offered a few funny stories on his past failed toasts and then did the real one, everyone taking a sip. The liquid hit his tongue, and he found himself not wanting more of it, not in the least. They talked for a while longer, and then he smirked at the camera on them and Yakan waved as they cut the live feed, leaving them with only the people in front of them again.

He searched the audience once more, eyes resting on the all-boys table near the back again and then looking pointedly at each of the others tables so as to be fair to everyone as he and Yakan explained what they were going to be doing today.

Kyo's lips turned up as Die made his toast, the words profound and sweet, proving to him for the millionth time that his lover was the most amazing man. He pulled the mask he was wearing down and took a perfunctory sip of the beer then set it down. When he glanced back up to find Die's gaze on him or at least on the table, he gave the slightest nod of his head, fighting not to smirk. He was anxious for the day to be brought to an end so he could put his true plan in action, a thrill going through him as he thought about it. Yes, this was going to be fun, if all went well.

Yakan made a few more smart aleck comments, and then they called it time for everyone to board the busses going toward their activities for the day. They left the room, and everyone else was instructed what bus they'd be on, decided by table they were sitting at, which had been mostly random as to where people chose to sit.

Die darted out toward the busses and crawled into the back of the waiting car. It was the only way he'd found to be fair to everyone there, was to not go on one of the busses and just lead the way in a car instead. Yakan joined him after a few minutes and Die watched through the tinted windows as the busses filled up.

Kyo pursed his lips as they finished up and instructed everyone to get on the busses. He had spent the ride up feeling nearly ill with nervousness that someone would notice who he was. He'd taken many precautions, but it only took one slip up. Of course, if he _was_ discovered, he'd just play it off like it was all part of it. He didn't want that though, and as he made his way to the back of the last bus, he once again found his stomach knotted up. He settled in his seat and huddled into his jacket as much as he could, leaning against the window with his head turned away from the girl sitting next to him.

For Die, the ride was spent with Yakan and him discussing what they'd for sure document of the trip and if the camera crew was going to follow them or not. Once it was decided that only one camera would be with them, but that it wouldn't be live-fed, Die eased up, feeling less like he was going to vibrate right out of his seat with nerves.

They made good time and when they got to their destination, Die got out and made his way to the dressing rooms where they'd already called ahead to have their rentals ready and an area away from the other arriving guests for him to change.

He made fast work of getting on his snow clothing and bundling up really well before he met everyone back out front, a huge grin on his face as he found Yakan all bundled up, too. They led an animated discussion of the events of the day and made their way out into the fields of snow, Die making a beeline for the largest drift to start making a snowman out of, something they hadn't exactly discussed, but that he definitely wanted to do.

The ride went by fairly quickly, Kyo having napped through most of it. When they arrived and were told where to change, he slipped over to the one security guard that knew of his presence and was instructed to a private area to change. 

He'd taken the precaution to rent a snow suit rather than bring his own, lest Die recognize it, though he was wearing his own boots. He easily blended back into the crowd and watched as Die started making a snowman, a grin spreading against his face. He pulled out his phone and took a couple of snaps, acting every part the awed fan.

Die struggled around in the snow, Yakan “helping”, though he was honestly hindering Die more than anything, mostly on purpose partly just because he was Yakan. But Die was amused by the whole thing, their actions relaxing him, if nothing else. 

By the time they were done with that, he murmured, "Follow my lead," to Yakan and then went racing off toward the giant inflatable slide, as fast as the snow would let him.

Kyo hung back while the others started playing in the snow as well, playing up the act of being ill. He smiled widely as Die took off for a huge inflatable slide, his lover acting like a kid. He snuck more photos then moved over to a small pile of snow, building a miniature snowman with devil horns for the hell of it. When he was done, he made his way to the hot chocolate station, getting a cup and then huddling beneath the awning to get out of the wind

Once Die and Yakan had gone down the slide, after struggling to get up it in the first place, they encouraged the group to start having fun in the snow for a while before they were to head out on snow mobiles if anyone had done rentals. 

Time drifted by for Die, almost haze-like as he enjoyed himself greatly with all the things he normally neglected to do as a very busy adult. It was somewhat like reliving his childhood, and he was honestly feeling freer than he had in a while.

By the time the staff began bringing out and lining up snow mobile, Die was flushed, covered in snow, and grinning like a complete dumbass. He slid onto the ski first, and he felt Yakan crawl on behind him and he just couldn't help himself as he started to laugh.

There was great fun to be had as everyone engaged in the festivities. Kyo interacted as much as he felt comfortable, though he remained by himself as much as he could. 

When it came time to ride the snow mobile, he got one by himself and took off after Die, careful not to get too close. He let some of the fangirls get in front of him, grinning at their obvious joy.

Driving the snow mobile was exhilarating, and Die made the decision that he'd definitely like to do this more often and that next time he'd bring his lover along for the ride. Yakan clung to him as he made a particularly sharp turn just for the hell of it, snow flying up behind them. 

The next half an hour had his adrenaline pumping and from the way Yakan was plastered to him, he knew it had his going as well. They pulled back up to turn in the snow mobile, and Die looked pleased as he disembarked, heading into the large tent with heaters that was set up just outside the shop for everyone to thaw out in.

He settled down and someone brought water, another person making rounds, asking for orders on coffee, hot coco, or hot tea.

After they were finished with the mobiles, Kyo settled quietly in a corner with his cup of hot tea. He was frozen but exhilarated and really enjoyed seeing how happy Die was. He made small talk with a couple of the fans, his voice low and whispery, an excuse sliding out easily that he had a sore throat. When he was left alone, he focused on Die, just watching him while trying to resist the urge to text him something inappropriate.

Die and Yakan chatted it up with a few of the closer fans, Die taking note that everyone seemed to be really good about trying to rotate out who was closest to them whenever they were seated somewhere. It was nice that they seemed to have worked such things out by themselves, something he had been hoping they'd do without needing his guidance.

He unzipped his jacket and removed his gloves, easing himself back as he fanned himself, hot inside the jacket and really feeling the fact that he didn't sweat like other people at the moment. Drinking his water, he made a quick decision to use the restroom before they left back toward the hotel, his body informing him he was done with the excitement and now needed usual function to resume.

He squirmed a little and drained the rest of the water bottle to cover it, a small shiver washing over him. Now was not the time... this was fan time, not Die needed to piss time.

Kyo had gotten up to get more tea when a seat near Die became vacant. He smirked a bit and moved to settle into it, catching Yakan's eye for a minute. He sipped his tea as he watched Die interact with an obviously smitten female fan, her eyes round as saucers as she held onto every word he said. When he started squirming, Kyo almost laughed out loud, knowing precisely what his lover needed at that moment. He wondered if he would dash off or if he would try to wait.

It only took a few minutes of Die talking to one of the random girls who was obviously doting on him for him to decide he needed away from the general situation as well as to ease his bladder. He gracefully made his way out of the conversation and then headed for the main office through the little attached doorway, slipping inside and immediately veering toward the restrooms.

Kyo watched him go, chuckling softly as he pulled out his phone. He typed out a text message and sent it off to Die, biting his tongue to keep from laughing. 

_"Hey, haven't heard from you all day. How's it going? Having a lot of fun without me?"_

He debated going into the restroom with Die but decided that'd be too easy to get caught and simply settled back again.

Die got the message shortly after he'd unzipped and blessedly started to relieve himself. He pulled out his phone and studied it as he finished up. Once he was done, he shook off, tucked himself back in, and zipped up. Flushing, he tucked his phone back in his pocket and washed his hands before retrieving his phone and responding. 

_"So much fun in the snow! You should watch the broadcast. I think we're doing more when we get back to the hotel. Probably another couple hours. Miss ya!"_

He shoved his phone back in his pocket and made sure he was entirely presentable before heading back out and going through the shops to the private dressing room. He found Yakan already there, back in his sweater and just waiting on Die.

He changed quickly and accepted the thermos of hot tea he was given as they stepped out of the back, thanking the staff and offering to pay for the thermos, but they didn't want that money, glad to have hosted him and all the people he'd brought with him.

A few more minutes found them outside, the busses already filled again, and he slipped into the back of the car, tossing his bag in the floorboard between him and Yakan and leaning back, exhausted.

Kyo got the text a few minutes later, reading it then chuckling to himself. He finished off his tea and turned to catch Yakan's eye, nodding his head toward the building before starting inside. 

In a moment, the security staff was following him, making sure he remained alone as he slipped into his change area. He made quick work of getting out of the borrowed clothing then headed for the busses just as everyone else had started to board them. He settled into his seat once more and leaned back, closing his eyes, quite tired now.

The ride back was split between Die sipping the tea in the thermos and trying not to nod off while Yakan talked almost non-stop. After a while, he finally burst out with, "I'm too old for this shit!" which only induced a round of laughter and both him and Yakan, shaking their heads while they lamented on ages long since passed.

By the time they got back, Die could feel his eyelids drooping, and he wished like hell someone would wake him up in some way or other. He trudged along into the hotel and went up to his room to freshen up.

He spent as little time as possible doing so and then came back down, following the group of people into the conference room and taking the stage, the person he'd been behind looking a bit shocked that he had been behind them the whole time, and they'd not noticed.

Kyo, having gotten in a bit of a nap on the ride back, felt a bit better than he had. He entered the conference room and nabbed a spot in the back, thankful to find hot tea at the table. They'd bring out dinner soon, and he could hardly wait, his stomach rather empty at this point. 

He checked the time then pulled out his phone, texting Die again. 

_"Hey, tuned in now, it's about to start streaming. There's a ton of people in the chat. Have fun! <3" _

Die carefully checked his phone under the table once he was seated and smiled a little before he put it away, making sure no one really knew what he was doing the whole time except Yakan. Once the streaming started, Yakan began talking, and Die followed suit, clutching his microphone like a lifeline as they spoke about the day, their experiences, and bantered lightly back and forth about random shit from the past.

Kyo watched Die check his phone then slip right into Mr. Celebrity mode, his smile wide and easy. He knew his fiancé was tired as hell though, the rings under his eyes just barely showing. 

At some point, halfway through the stream, Kyo got bored and decided to mess with his lover. When it cut to a PV, he pulled out his phone again, finding a recent picture of his abs and sending it off to Die. 

_"Miss you. Just got done working out and could really use a 'cool down'."_

Die discretely pulled out his phone and took a gander at the text, wetting his lips and doing his best not to look like he was currently feeling, which was turned on. He shot off a text in reply quickly before pushing his phone back into his pocket.

 _"There are people in front of me you know! Thanks for the boner though, haha!"_

He shifted a bit and picked his microphone back up, a small smirk on his lips.

Kyo read the reply, grinning to himself. He typed out another one, knowing Die wouldn't have time to answer this one as the PV was almost over. 

_"That makes two of us, then. I was rock hard before I could finish my sets. Too bad you're not here. At least I can jack it to your face on the screen."_

Die chanced pulling his phone out once more when it vibrated and after the first bit, he flushed a little, shoving it back into his pocket for later perusal and focused on the people in front of him. The video ended, and he and Yakan set back into talking once the clapping settled. Required topics, then they were ending the first part and waiting a few moments before heading into the next bit for paid users on the live stream.

Kyo cackled quietly, ignoring the look from the guy sitting next to him. He left Die to doing his hosting, glad when the first part ended. It would only be a little while longer then he could have Die all to himself.

Die kept playing with his hair and fidgeting enough that he knew Yakan would be all over his case later about what the hell Kyo had been texting him. They knew one another well enough that there was no way he was going to miss it.

They went over a few more random topics and finally, things came to a close with the live streaming event. Die announced that they were to return to the dining hall from earlier and they'd all be served dinner according to the meals they'd picked out when checking in, and then waited on everyone to file out, his eyes flitting over the crowd as they left.

Kyo clapped as loudly as the rest of them then stood, slipping off to the side a bit while the crowd filed past, their meal tickets in hand. He dug his own out then casually started for the dining room, taking his time so that Die would end up nearly right beside him as they walked.

Die waited until he couldn't wait any longer and then did his best to discretely adjust under the table before getting up and heading along with the crowd. He caught up rather quickly, not trying to temper his steps, and ended up at the door at the same time as one of the guys on the trip. He smiled politely and gestured for them to go ahead of him.

Kyo nearly burst out laughing when Die caught up to him and ushered him ahead. He simply bowed his head and stepped in front of him, intentionally brushing against him as he did. He got seated at a table near the back, more in shadow than the others. He'd known eating was going to be a challenge and had opted for soup so as to have the bowl hiding his face while his mask was down.

Die nearly choked on his own oxygen as the guy brushed up against him. He did his best to mask his horror at probably being caught - by a random dude - having a boner in the worst possible manner. He kept himself quiet though, rushing to get to the dining area and seated at the table in the middle of the room. He'd have to give Yakan hell later for putting the dinner table in the middle of the room, knowing Die didn't eat delicately enough for this public spectacle.

The waiter brought their food first, blackened fish and rice for Yakan and curry for Die. Then, they began to move around the place, delivering food to the other tables in the single most efficient manner Die had ever seen.

After Die was seated, Kyo pulled out his phone again and selected a lewd picture of his cock covered in cum that he hadn't showed his lover yet. He sent it off with the caption 

_"Couldn't help myself."_

Die felt his phone vibrate, and he touched his pocket, but something told him he really shouldn't be looking at it with all these eyeballs on him right then. He was tempted to tell Kyo he'd text him back, but it was too risky. Prying eyes and a bunch of people that had paid for his attention didn't mix well with revealing he was in a very gay relationship with Kyo. He just patted his pocket and tried to mentally send his lover well wishes. and the idea that he'd check it later before he went back to his food.

Kyo watched Die's hand go for his pocket then come back sans phone. A flicker of disappointment shot through him, but he knew it was risky anyway. Instead, he focused on eating, his head down for most of the time. Everyone was watching Die or talking amongst themselves anyway, so he was lucky in that regard.

Once Die had finished eating, he was a little calmer in the pants department and got up to start randomly making stops at people's tables. Some, he just got a quick word in, but when he found an interesting conversation to drop in on, he stayed a bit longer, contributed his fifty yen worth and then moved on. 

The guys had all congregated at the same table again and Die found himself gravitating there, feeling a bit more at ease with the less adoring looks coming from them. He smiled and gestured to the empty seat next to the one who'd bumped into him earlier. "Mind if I sit, guys?"

Kyo watched Die get up and start moving around the tables, chatting with the fans. When he headed towards his own, the singer quickly wiped his mouth and slid his mask back in place. Die moved to stand right next to him and he almost laughed when he asked to sit in the seat next to him. He didn't though and offered a quiet "Go ahead," with a gesture of his hand. Oh this was going to be priceless if he could pull it off.

Die turned the chair around and sat astride it, leaning forward and grinning at the guys at the table. "So... having a good time?"

Several of the guys offered up cheerful greetings and then went on to say they were indeed having an awesome time. Kyo nodded as well then leaned in a bit, just subtly brushing his leg against Die's. 

One of the guys set his chopsticks down and looked around before grinning and leaning towards Die. "So, Die-san, rumor has it that you've been pretty tight with a smokin' babe lately. Is it true?" The other guys at the table laughed then looked to Die eagerly, hoping for a juicy tidbit.

Die sucked in his breath when the question came, tactfully ignoring the leg pressed against his own. If he didn't react, he didn't bother anyone. He hissed his breath back out, clicking his tongue. "Mmm... well... I can't kiss and tell, right?" He laughed, though his hand went to his phone in his pocket, fingers lightly touching it as he thought of Kyo. He'd probably not love it if he came out at the guy's table at the vacation event... without him. But hell if he knew what else to do besides just be vague right now.

Kyo bit his tongue hard to keep from bursting out laughing at Die's obvious discomfort. He did appreciate the tactful way he skirted around the issue though, and his eyes caught the touch to his pocket. It made him feel almost guilty for pulling this ruse, but he knew the end result would be well worth. 

Schooling his voice and accent, he leaned in a bit, letting his leg rub against Die's some more. "Very honorable of you, Die- _san_."

Die let out a laugh, though it was a little more uncomfortable than anything else. First he'd accidentally rubbed his dick on this guy and now... oh god, oh no. Fear lanced through Die as he realized that, perhaps, that had been taken in the wrong way. But he had to be nice to everyone. He'd been enduring girls half-hitting on him all night, and he wasn't going to be that dick that went about things differently just because it was a dude.

He sniffed a bit and then bit his lip. Finally, he murmured, "Who saw that Giant's final?" There, baseball talk was sure to at least garner a response... and maybe a distraction from whatever was happening with their legs, right?

The other guys at the table all laughed as Die changed the topic, but they were happy to get onto something they all knew. Kyo played along, having seen the final simply because Die had been watching it on their TV. He made a few comments about some things that Die had gotten excited about, watching his lover's face. 

While they were chatting, he let his leg press against Die's some more before carefully pulling it away, acting as though he was merely shifting in his seat.

Die looked thrilled that everyone at the table seemed to understand just the parts that he had loved... especially the guy with his leg still pressed against his own. His mind caught onto that fact, and he pursed his lips for a second, feeling a little bothered by it. After a few moments, he plunged onward with the conversation, trying to tighten his legs against the chair as subtly as possible. The guy moved his leg a moment later, and Die felt incredible relief.

After a few minutes more of baseball conversation - about the direction they hoped the coaches would take and how certain players should be picked up since others were retiring next season, and maybe one scathing comment about a certain player he had intense dislike for after several botched games due to the guy - Die finally pushed himself up, having a few more tables to visit and carefully and gracefully exited the conversation.

Kyo smirked behind his mask as Die looked visibly relieved. He behaved himself for the rest of the conversation, murmuring his agreement with whatever coach and player issues they were discussing. When Die left the table, he chanced a sip of his tea then sat back, watching his lover as he chatted up the other tables. After a bit, he pulled out his phone and shot off a text to Yakan. 

_"Make sure he goes to the bar after...thanks."_

Yakan received the text just as he was coming back out of the restroom, and he glanced toward Kyo, waiting until he caught his eye and gave him an affirming nod. 

Nearly another hour passed before dinner seemed to be coming to a close, desserts having been served and champagne being offered around. Die has still not touched a single thing to drink other than the sip of beer earlier and had been living off of water. As such, he was getting toward being a bit moody, his nerves eating away at him, and Yakan seized the opportunity as it was presented.

He grasped Die's elbow and guided him away through the hotel as everyone was meandering toward the doors, leading them quickly to the elevators and ascending to the second floor where he directed Die toward the lounge without a single word. And, Die, for his part, didn't protest in the least. It meant potential for fewer of the fans to wander in and see him sloshed, and it also meant he could freely go about drowning his nerves in preparation for tomorrow's half day.

Kyo relaxed once he'd gotten confirmation from Yakan that he would take care of Die. He passed on dessert and champagne, claiming he was full and the alcohol would interfere with his cold meds later. 

The events finally came to a close and everyone began making their way to their respective rooms, politely ignoring the direction Die and Yakan went. Kyo, however, headed for a nearby restroom, intending to clean up a bit and touch up the eye makeup he'd worn to add to his disguise. 

He entered a stall and relieved himself before going to wash his hands and fix up his hair now that he'd finally removed the cap he'd been wearing. He'd dyed it the night before, so Die had no idea of the coloring. After touching up the eyeliner and replacing his tinted glasses and mask, he made his way towards the lounge, excitement bubbling up inside of him.

Die eased himself down directly at the bar, leaning heavily on it and when the glass was set in front of him and the bartender asking what they could get him, he pointed at the top shelf whiskey and held up three fingers. Soon enough, the crystal decanter was being poured and the drink was sloshing into the glass, Die watching it and licking his lips.

He chanced it now, pulling his phone out, and entering the code to unlock the screen. He pulled up the last text and huffed out a laugh, seeing Kyo's cum-covered cock. Arousal surged inside him, and he knocked back half of his drink as he viewed the photo before finally typed back

_"Nice cock, I'll fuck you good and hard when I see you again."_

He sent it off and then pushed his phone back in his pocket, draining the rest of the drink and gesturing for another one.

Kyo had slipped into the lounge and sat hiding in the shadows while Die ordered his drink. He intended to wait until his lover was just a bit tipsy. When his phone buzzed in his pocket, he let out a soft huff of a laugh, pulling it out and reading the message. Heat spiraled within him as he fought back the urge to inform Die that that would be sooner than he thought. Instead, he replied, further teasing his lover. 

_"Mm, promise? I'm aching to wrap my lips around your cock."_

When Die's second drink arrived, he took a sip of it and then breathed out a sigh. He glanced over at Yakan, who was quietly nursing a beer. "Long day," he offered by way of conversation, sliding his phone out to glance at it under the ledge of the bar. Choking back a moan, he typed out, _"Promise"_ and then sent it before shoving his phone back in his pants and doing his best to focus on Yakan instead. 

Yakan just nodded, though he looked nearly half asleep. Die prodded him a little and murmured, "You can call it a night; that's fine." He took another sip of his drink, playing his hands around the cool glass. "I'll be fine."

Kyo read his next message then put his phone away. He declined to order a drink for the moment and just sat watching Die and Yakan. After several more minutes, he finally stood and made his way to the bar, settling onto the stool right next to Die just in time to hear him tell Yakan to call it a night.

Die paid the person next to him little to no mind for the time being. Yakan opened his mouth to protest, but upon noticing Kyo sitting next to Die, he figured he'd make his life easier, and pushed himself up, draining most of his beer and pushing some money toward Die for the tab. "Keep the extra for yours. I'm out." He yawned, making a point of it, and then padded off toward the exit, looking for all the world just as worn out as he felt.

Kyo offered Yakan a little wink as the other departed then turned to the bartender, ordering the same exact thing as Die, though less of it. When that was done, he turned his head slightly towards the other and spoke in the same careful tone he'd used before. "It _has_ been a long day, mm?"

When the bartender picked up the same crystal decanter and poured some for the man next to him, Die honestly was more than a bit surprised. It wasn't exactly inexpensive at nearly 3500 yen a shot. The voice told him who it was before he even turned to look, and his nerves descended on him once again. This one was persistent... not that Die could blame him. If a famous musician rubbed their hard dick up against him before Kyo, he'd probably have jumped all over it. So it was probably less surprising than it should have been.

He offered a small smile and nodded. "Probably shouldn't admit it, but I'm beat." He grinned a little and drained the rest of his glass, holding up two fingers this time to the bartender, who studied him for a moment before pouring it. Truth was, he was only just feeling it, the liquor smooth and strong, but his years of drinking beating it still.

Kyo could tell Die was nervous again, and he wanted to laugh. He carefully pushed his mask up to swallow down half of the liquor before replacing it. 

He shifted subtly on the stool, his leg once again coming in contact with Die's. "I don't blame you. That was a lot of activity for one day."

Die didn't move away, still not wanting to insult this dude, but in his head, he was trying to figure out a way to tell him that he wasn't interested. He took another sidelong glance while the guy was distracted by the bartender pouring and felt a strange wave of familiarity wash over him. Blinking, he looked away. 

Obviously Kyo had gotten him too riled up, and he was just seeing certain aspects of this man that were similar, since he was coming onto him. He held onto his drink for a moment once it was poured, deliberating his sanity before he tossed it all back in one go and then asked for a bottle of water. The bartender looked satisfied at that and pushed over a bottle before heading off to deal with some other guests. Die cracked open the bottle and took a good swig before he began to search for a topic. Anything. He needed to stop being awkward.

"So... fishing," he finally came out with, cursing himself loudly in his head even as the words passed his lips. So much for not being awkward.

Kyo watched Die carefully, could see the discomfort on his lover's face and took some amount of pleasure from it. He knew that Die would be forever faithful to him, but it was certainly interesting to see him so stoutly avoiding flirtations of any kind. When Die blurted out about fishing, he couldn't help himself and just started to laugh, fighting to keep it as unlike his natural laugh as possible. "Fishing? I don't fish. My....roommate... likes to though. He's all about that bass."

Die stared at the guy for a moment after the laughing started and when the last line came forth from his mouth, he started to laugh as well, pushing his hand against his lips to stifle it at least somewhat. After a moment, he gasped out, "Good English," before doing his level best to stop laughing.

Kyo grinned behind the mask then shrugged. "It's not. I suck at English, to be honest."

He shifted a bit, his hand "accidentally" touching Die's thigh as he brought it up to grab his glass. Swirling the liquid around, he contemplated how to carry this out. He didn't want to reveal himself just yet, but there was only so much he could do without Die catching on.

Die relaxed just a bit, giving the other an easy smile, even with the hand that brushed past his thigh. He wasn't sure if that was intentional or not, but he wrote it off as unintentional and even reached to swipe up a few drops of the alcohol that had been spilled on the table top with a cocktail napkin so the guy didn't put his arm down in it. Crumpling the napkin, he opened his water again and took another solid swig of it before motioning for the bartender to come back. 

"Nah, I think it's good. Everyone has to start somewhere, you know? Back on Family Values, mine was horrible. I sort of learned with trial by fire." He held up three more fingers and got three fingers worth of whiskey in his glass again. This time, when he added the liquor, he actually felt it, his head feeling a little light and his body starting to warm up. He thumped the glass back down and ordered another before cutting himself off by pulling out his wallet and plucking free enough bills to cover it and the guy's drink next to him and Yakan's beer. "For the guy that was here before and his as well," he nodded toward his perhaps overly friendly companion.

Kyo licked his lips, the mask poking out as he did. "Family Values, you guys were in the states yeah? So you had plenty of immersion there." He watched as Die ordered then took another shot, a gleam in his eyes. 

He was about to offer to buy the next round, but then Die was pulling out bills and paying for his. He raised his hand and put up a polite but not overly strong protest. "No, no, you really shouldn't. You'll have to let me make it up to you," he offered, the fire evident in his eyes, hidden though they were. He took a chance and let his hand drop, sliding it over Die's thigh right over a spot he knew for a fact tickled.

Die's leg jerked, and he nearly choked at the rather blatant offer. Maybe... buying him a drink had not sent the right signals. He'd just been trying to be a good and friendly guitarist of a band this person clearly liked enough to pay a lot for a vacation with. Though, he was starting to wonder if perhaps they just liked him more than the band itself... or maybe just wanted a piece of band ass and he _was_ , after all, known as the easy one in the band.

He swallowed and waved his hand. "It's fine, really. Just... glad for your support." It was meek and a horrible sort of cover for his nerves, but it was all he could find.

Kyo had to hold in his laugh this time, watching Die squirm with glee. He left his hand right where it was. "Oh, I've always supported you....and the band. I'm just glad to have this opportunity to show it _personally_...," he murmured, his tone sultry, his accent nearly slipping.

On some drunken back level, Die had to admit it was sort of nice to have someone hitting on him that wasn't a girl for once. But, on the other hand, this was very uncomfortable, and he didn't even know where to begin with that.

"It's really not necessary," he murmured, receiving his change and tucking it away, careful not to show his ID or anything else that would reveal his real name. He tucked his wallet back in his pocket and picked up his drink, afraid to stay and afraid to leave least he have to honestly turn this guy down for whatever he was offering.

Then again... maybe he wasn't even offering it. Maybe Die was being a jackass and assuming. Oh, the poor guy... what if he didn't intend to be coming off like this at all? That eased Die back up, and he took another swig from his glass, doing his best as he sat it down and moved to stretch, to move his leg away from the invading touch while making it look like he needed to ease some tension in his muscles.

Kyo bit his lip as Die went about getting his change and then stretching in such an elaborate way. When he settled again, Kyo finally leaned in, murmuring lowly so the bartender wouldn't hear him. "Are you always so oblivious to come-ons, Die?"

This time, Die's breath hitched, and he actually grabbed his drink, shoving it to his mouth and chugging the rest of it, coughing at how not smoothly he'd done it. His glass clunked back down, and he grasped his water bottle, trying to stop the sputtering with that as a way to buy himself time to find some form of answer to that. Finally, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and offered a, "Uh... I don't know." What the fuck was he supposed to say to this?

Kyo pulled back slightly as Die started sputtering on his drink. He gave his thigh a tight squeeze then removed his hand, clicking his tongue. "I guess so...that's too bad." He paused, glanced at the bartender then quietly murmured, "I'd love to go on my knees for you..."

This time when the offer came out so bluntly, Die's mouth fish-flapped for a moment before he cleared his throat and blurted out, "Gotta take a leak; be back." He seriously needed a moment to think.

With that, he clung onto his bottle of water and slid off the stool, heading for the bathroom. He slipped into a stall, not locking the door, but hoping it'd provide enough privacy to think for a second. He put his water bottle down and pulled out his phone, staring at it for a moment before pushing it back into his pocket. No... he'd fix this on his own. Somehow. He turned and went to take his cock out, starting to urinate into the toilet a moment later.

Kyo could barely contain himself as Die announced he had to take a leak. He gave it a minute then pulled out his phone, shooting off a text to his lover. 

_"Hey gorgeous, Yakan said things wrapped up for the night. How you doin'?"_

When his phone vibrated, Die sighed. Finishing up pissing, he tucked himself back in and flushed. Pulling out his phone, he unlocked it and looked over Kyo's message. Chewing his lower lip, he typed back out a quick reply. 

_"Sort of dealing with a crisis currently. Just a minor one potentially due to my own stupidity, but I'll fix it. Text you when I'm back in my room for the night. Love you."_

He sighed and then released his lip, shoving his phone back in his pants and going out of the stall to wash his hands, utterly forgetting his water.

Kyo read the return text and sent a quick "Love you, too" before sliding off of his stool and strolling towards the bathroom. He listened at the door and heard the water running. He gave it another few seconds before finally pushing the door open and stepping inside, staring at Die's face through the mirror as he clicked the lock shut.

Die finished washing his hands and turned off the faucet just as he heard the lock click on the door. He didn't even have to look up to know where this was going or who was in here with him. He almost hoped it was a girl, brash and bold and that he knew well enough how to make laugh and forget about seducing him within minutes. But this... his eyes flicked up and he found the guy behind him... he was not prepared for. He swallowed and reached for paper towels, sending off a prayer to the universe that he'd get out of this somehow without pissing off a fan or getting himself in any deeper than this.

Kyo stood there for a moment before stepping over to Die. He offered him a smile as he effectively blocked Die into the sink area by leaning his arm against the wall. "So...hiding in the bathroom? This isn't high school, Dai~suke."

Die gave him an unimpressed look and shook his head. "I was washing my hands after taking a piss." He laughed. "I know, clean freak, but whatever." He assessed his current situation and found he was definitely pinned in. He'd have to turn this guy down if he went for it, that was the only option left. He thought of the variety of excuses that could help him out. Then he found it. Whiskey dick... he could just claim that and not let the poor guy feel horrible and deal with the fallout on the Internet if there were any. Fuck it.

Kyo could tell from the way Die was behaving that he was going to have to give up his ruse soon. He started by pulling off his gloves, stuffing them into his pocket. He reached up with his tattooed hand, pushing his glasses up onto the top of his head. He wondered if Die would catch on at this point. 

"I like clean freaks; it means I never get a mouthful of nasty dick."

Die's vision hazed slightly as the guy began removing his gloves and taking off his sunglasses. His heart raced, and he swallowed thickly. After a few moments, he breathed out, "It won't do any good, I've got major whiskey dick after that much alcohol." A lie, a horrible lie... if anything he always got a harder boner after drinking, but fuck if this guy knew that. With that, he actively moved right toward him, skirting around the sink and brushing past him to try to get toward the door. "I'm sorry, but I'm sure you can understand... I had an awful lot."

Kyo licked his lips and tensed his arm, physically preventing Die from passing. "You're lying...," he intoned, pressing his hand against Die's chest and pushing him back slightly. "Your dick loves alcohol, always has."

Die's eyes briefly flashed with panic at the idea that he might have to actually _force_ his way out of this situation. He was certain he could, he wasn't weak and he'd been working out with Kyo at least once a week lately. And – his mind came to an abrupt halt at the words 'always has', and his forehead creased with confusion. His eyes scanned the face in front of him, holding the gaze for a moment, and then feeling the bicep he'd grabbed onto in his attempt to get past. On a whim, he reached out and pulled the guy's mask down, hissing out, "You son of a bitch," at the same time, visibly relaxing when he could fully see it was Kyo.

Kyo saw the panic Die's eyes and was reaching to remove his mask before Die beat him to it. He couldn't help but smirk at his lover, lowering his arm. "Surprise," was all he said, letting out a soft chuckle, treading a bit carefully lest Die was actually peeved off.

"I should punch you for this." Die sagged back against the wall, pushing a shaky hand through his hair. "Holy shit! Do you have any idea how fucking scared I was that I was going to end up pissing off some poor fan? How... how the hell did you manage this anyway?" He didn't look mad, though. He was rambling and unable to stop it, unused adrenaline forcing his mouth into overdrive.

Kyo pursed his lips, shrinking back the slightest bit, giving Die some space to breathe. "I had Yakan's help throughout most of it. I played a cold, and kept quiet most of the time..."

Die pinched his nose and then swiped his be-ringed hand over his face. "Believe this; I thought this was all because you fucking gave me a boner, and I accidentally rubbed it against this guy... you... whatever. And I was freaking out that I'd accidentally caused all of this, and someone was gonna kill me for this shit."

Kyo shook his head, pulling the mask off completely and stuffing it into his pocket. "That was all rather on purpose...I was seeking to rile you up. Not send you into a panic..."

Die studied Kyo for a few moments and then breathed out, "Baby... I'm faithful as fuck to you. There's no way this could have gone any other way unless I'd secretly found out it was you. And even then, I'd be wary to act on it, with you thinking I didn't know." He reached out and cupped his cheek. "Now get your ass to my hotel room and stop with all this teasing, punk."

Kyo had to smile at that, his lover's declaration of faithfulness making his heart swell. He reached up to cup Die's hand for a moment then pulled away. He re-disguised himself with the gloves, glasses and mask then turned, unlocking the bathroom door. "You're amazing, you know that?" With that, he exited, making his way slowly towards the elevators.

Die snorted out a laugh and made for the door. But after a second, he realized he forgot his water. Going back to get it, he then took his time leaving, heading for the elevators as well, trying to make sure he didn't see any fans. He came to the elevator just as it arrived and stepped inside with Kyo, making it look like coincidence. The doors slid shut and Die pressed for the top floor, smirking a little as he slid his key card in the slot and pulled it out once it validated, and the elevator began to move. "Penthouse."

Kyo smirked slightly, leaning against the wall of the elevator and watching Die. "Penthouse, eh? Very nice. Did Yakan spring for that or was the production team feeling generous?"

"Network. I didn't even have to pay for it. Yakan has the other one on the other tower. They felt we were the most important ones here today." He waited for what seemed like an eternity, slowly contemplating how he was going to deal with this. He pursed his lips a little as he debated his various options, not the least of which included giving Kyo a good scare of his own. But then again, it'd all been in good fun from his perspective, right? Or maybe... it hadn't been. 

It was the doubt, the single thought that perhaps it had been a test that convinced Die to get one modicum of revenge of his own.

Kyo hummed then left Die to his brooding silence. He felt that somewhere he'd overstepped, gone too far with his ploy. He hadn't meant to throw Die into a state of panic or make it seem as if he'd been testing his lover. He'd just wanted to prank him a bit. He pushed a hand through his short hair, shifting onto his other foot. Hopefully, it would all smooth over in the end.

They arrived, and the doors slid open to reveal the gorgeous room that Die had only managed to step into very briefly when he'd first arrived to stow his bag. The carpet was plush and cream colored except the little white and gold marble entryway where they were to put their shoes. A large, ornate mirror hung on one side of the entryway, the other wall blank.

Die took two steps in, pausing as if he were about to bend down and take his shoes off, waiting for Kyo to step out before he implemented his quickly-formed plan. Kyo moved into the suite behind Die, looking around at the Western-style opulence of it. He started toeing off his shoes, having chosen loafers for the day instead of his boots.

Die let him get the second shoe off and then turned on him, his hand grasping Kyo's throat as not-delicately as he dared, and shoved him back against the wall with a small snarl. He'd test it, see how this would go.

Kyo had barely gotten his shoes off when he found himself with a hand around his throat and his back against the wall, a small huff of breath leaving him. His eyes widened as he looked at Die, searching his face and finding heat and anger in his eyes. A frisson of fear went down his spine even as heat pooled in his belly.

Die didn't say a word. Instead, he slowly pressed his fingers against the artery harder and harder, attempting to give Kyo a light-headed feeling that might fuzz him out a little. Kyo attempted to swallow, his hand coming up to grip Die's wrist though he made no attempt to pull his hand away. His vision started growing hazy around the edges, and his pulse quickened. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he knew getting off on this was wrong, but his pants were already tightening.

Die waited, watching Kyo from under hooded lashes, waiting. When he knew Kyo was starting to get aroused, he abruptly kissed him, his five o'clock shadow and slightly chapped lips grating across Kyo's smoother skin. Kyo couldn't stop the strangled groan that left him as Die kissed him. The pure masculine feel of his lover's barely there mustache sending sparks shooting through him. The kiss was harsh, grating and tinged with desperation. Kyo clung to that desperation he felt from Die's actions, it only serving to fuel his arousal more even as Die's hand was around his throat. 

After a few long moments, Die pulled away, shoving Kyo a little as he let go and stepped back. He pointed at his boots. "Take them off."

Kyo dropped immediately to his knees, starting to unlace them. Die crossed his arms as he watched Kyo start to unlace his boots. "Be careful with them." He kept his tone level and precise.

Kyo flicked his eyes up then lowered them, his tongue sliding over his bottom lip. "As you wish," he murmured, finally moving to pull one off of Die's foot, slowly removing it before setting it down. His heart was racing as he moved to the other, the tone in Die's voice making him anxious to see where this would lead. 

He got the other boot off and set it besides the first, making sure they were lined up neatly against the wall. After, he looked up at Die again, awaiting whatever the other hand in mind.

Die stared at Kyo for a moment, watching him settle back in place. He shifted and slid his foot up Kyo's side and then to his shoulder before shoving him backwards and then turning and stalking off toward the huge plush couch, all brown suede and gorgeous. He flopped down on the couch, lying across it one leg on the floor, reaching down to unfasten his pants.

Kyo shivered as Die's foot traveled up his side, wondering just where his lover was taking things. When he was kicked back, he let out a soft cry, landing on his ass on the floor. Die walked off into the living area and he could just barely see him flop down on the couch. He hesitated, staying where he was for the moment, awaiting on Die's next instructions.

Die fully opened his pants, freeing his cock and yawning a little. He quietly coaxed his length into being half hard and then let it go, pillowing his arms behind his head. "Are you going to get your ass over here, or just lie on the floor?"

As soon as Die spoke, Kyo got to his feet and padded into the living room, standing beside the couch. He let his eyes rake over the other's form, focusing on the half-hard length between his legs. He licked his lips as his eyes moved up to Die's face.

Die studied him for a few moments and then his face softened. "I thought about forcing you to suck me off, but all I really wanted to do was prove a point." He pursed his lips and then motioned Kyo toward him.

Kyo bit his lip for a moment then let out a huff of a laugh. "Mm, I would have gladly played along..." He moved to straddle Die, sinking down onto the couch with him.

Die reached up and slid his hands through his hair. "Baby... were you testing me?" He'd meant to get laid first, but it wasn't working in his favor just yet.

Kyo frowned, reaching to cup Die's face. "Not in the least. It was supposed to be a bit of fun. " He ducked his head, pushing his face against Die's neck. "I didn't mean to go too far."

Die pulled him back up to look into his eyes, a little bit of hurt reflected in his own. "But what if I'd not done the right thing? If I'd acted on that one moment I thought you seemed far too familiar earlier today, and assumed it was you and you didn't know I knew... and I let you blow me in the bathroom. How would that have gone over?"

Kyo sighed softly, a frown on his face. "I trust you unconditionally, Die. You know me and you know my touch. I'd have assumed you figured it out and were just playing along at that point."

"Risky," Die murmured, pulling Kyo down toward him. He nuzzled under his lover's neck. "Was it at least funny, seeing me trying so hard not to be a dick when it was obvious you were coming on to me?"

Kyo shifted a bit, running his hand through Die's hair. He smiled softly, letting out a laugh. "It was endearing, to be honest. You were trying so hard not to upset a fan. It really showed me how much of a wonderful person you are."

"Well, I'm glad it provided something besides my pent up desire." He finally cracked a little smile, obvious in his voice. "I was so horrified that I'd started it or something. You could not have planned that better than me to have bumped into you like that."

Kyo lifted his head back, a slight grin on his face. "Darling, I didn't plan for you to bump into me. That was all on you."

"Oh... oh lord." Die huffed out a laugh and then flushed a little. "So basically I could have done that to a fan… fuck me."

Kyo snorted, shaking his head. "Yes, but they would have just been amused and maybe gossiped about it. It wouldn't have been as big a deal, I don't think. Then again, I'm not a fangirl..."

"Please... it would have been huge." Die laughed and then squirmed a little. "I'm horribly still aroused and frankly, you owe me a blowjob. We'll leave it at I forgive you, and I see what you were trying to do, even though I reacted... poorly to it. And... um... as for what I did in the entryway, I feel horrible about it, and I realize now it was verging on abusive, and that's not okay."

Kyo laughed then shifted, looking at his lover's face. He opened his mouth to readily agree on the blowjob but then shut it as Die kept talking. Another frown worked its way on his face, and he shook his head. "Die...we've played those games before....it wasn't abusive. Not between us, not like that. We know our ground rules and safe words. All I had to do was tap out if I was uncomfortable in any way."

Die relaxed a little and then closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, he smiled a little hopeful look up at him. "Just... circumstances being what they were... and the fact that I was actually trying to... be a dick." He sighed, the smile gone again as he took on a faraway sort of look. "But, yeah, if you'd tapped out, I'd have stopped in an instant. If I ever got somewhere you'd not want, it would really surprise me, actually."

His hands left Kyo's hair and came to rub over his face. "Fuck my brain... I'm just tired and confused and horny, and none of this is working well together, you know?"

Kyo bit his lip, nodding a little. He finally leaned down and pressed his lips to Die's, kissing him gently. "I'm sorry it didn't work out. Let me at least make it up to you..." He kissed him again, reaching down between them to wrap his hand around Die's still exposed length, stroking at an unhurried pace.

Die pulled Kyo down and whispered out, "I'm sorry, love... I'm so tightly wound at these things, and I just... you pretended too well, I guess." He took in a shaky breath, Kyo's hand on him doing a number. His hips pressed up toward Kyo's hand while his fingers stroked over his newly changed hair. "I love you and adore you, and I'd do anything for you. Forgive me..."

Kyo nuzzled against Die's neck, pressing lightly kisses to the skin while he stroked him. "It's okay, Koi. I love you, and of course I forgive you. Now shush, and let me help you unwind." 

With that, he dipped his hand down, cupping Die's sac and squeezing lightly before returning to stroke his length, working on getting him hard.

Die closed his eyes, holding Kyo as close as he dared with the other working diligently between them. His hips pushed up, and he whimpered a little, a shiver ripping through him, making it clear he wanted this perhaps more than he'd let on that he did.

After a few more minutes of stroking, Kyo pulled back and shifted down between Die's legs. He pushed the other's shirt up, leaning down to circle a nipple with his tongue before drawing it between his teeth. He turned and did the same to the other, his hand stroking over Die's exposed side.

Die panted slightly when Kyo started to tease his nipples. "Ah, fuck," he hissed out, pushing his chest toward Kyo. His cock was incredibly hard, and all he could think about was exactly what was going on right then, nothing else.

Kyo let out a soft groan, loving the way Die reacted to his actions. He kept his fingers busy tweaking Die's nipples as he trailed half-formed kisses down his abdomen, pausing to dip his tongue into his belly button.

After a while of the teasing, Die finally let out a huff of breath. "Please? Is that what we're looking for?" He chuckled afterward, a small smirk on his lips.

Kyo nipped the skin just below Die's belly button then looked up, letting out a laugh. "Mm, it helps, but no, I was just taking my time with your delicious body." 

He shifted again, finally grabbing hold of Die's cock once more then lowering his head to wrap his lips around the tip.

Die's hips nearly bucked when Kyo finally touched put his mouth to his cock. He made a throaty sound and pushed his head back on the couch, the crease between his brows deepening as he closed his eyes.

Kyo glanced up at Die's face as he mouthed the tip, kissing it and swirling his tongue around it. He kept this up for several moments before sliding about half-way down then beginning to slide.

Die squirmed under Kyo's touch, his hips trying so hard not to start humping upward until he finally started a thin whine in frustration at his own body. His hands went to grab the extra fabric of the couch, fingers curling as he fought not to let himself completely go. But he was so stressed out, so pent up, that it was nearly impossible.

Kyo pulled his head back when Die started whining and squirming. He flicked his tongue over the head again then sat back, licking his lips. "Your body is the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen."

Panting softly, Die pushed one arm over his face, hiding the fact that he felt somewhere between blushing and outright sobbing. After a moment, he reached up toward Kyo with his other hand, trying to get him to lean down.

Kyo peered at Die for a long moment before leaning back down over him, his face hovering above Die's.

Die pulled Kyo down and then wrapped both arms around him. "I need you... more than just your mouth."

Kyo nuzzled into Die's neck, kissing softly. "Then let's move to the bed, and I will give you anything you need." He pulled back carefully then got off of Die, standing. He undressed himself before going into the bedroom, settling on the edge of the rather plush bed.

Die took a moment to compose himself and then shed his clothing as well, carrying everything into the bedroom in front of him. Once inside, he set his things down and then firmly closed the door, flicking on the heater in the room and sliding onto the bed, pushing the covers down and curling up under them. "Come here."

Kyo stood and moved to crawl into the bed with Die, tension lacing through him. He could tell his lover was still unhappy, unsettled with the events of the day.

Once Kyo was on the bed, Die rolled over and curled himself around Kyo, pulling his lover's hand down to his length as he tucked his head under his chin and began to lick and lightly nip at his throat and neck.

Kyo shifted partially onto his side, letting Die lead his hand to his length. He wrapped his fingers around it and began stroking again, letting out a soft sigh of appreciation as Die's mouth worked on his neck. Kyo groaned at the attention, his hand stroking faster over Die's length. 

Die worked his way over every inch of Kyo's exposed neck and throat, even up under his jaw until he finally slid himself over Kyo, straddling him, and began to rock himself back against his lover's cock as he found Kyo's mouth with his own.

When the other rolled on top of him and began rocking, Kyo let out a loud moan, his hands going to grasp Die's hips. He kissed the other back deeply, his tongue pushing into his mouth.

Die kissed Kyo for a good while before pulling back and shifting so that Kyo's dick was sliding right along his crack the whole time. He moved as quick as he could, panting softly as he finally reared back and put his hands on Kyo's chest for support.

Kyo couldn't help but buck his hips up as his cock slid along Die's crack, the sensation making him ache for more. He squeezed Die's thighs tightly then slid his hands around to cup his ass, kneading his cheeks. "Die," he murmured, gazing up at him.

"Push them together," Die breathed out, refusing to stop what he was doing long enough to get lube or anything else, and it'd been too long since he'd taken Kyo for him to manage it without some serious prep anyway. His head fell back, and he used Kyo for even more leverage.

Kyo grunted and shifted a bit, pushing Die's cheeks together around his cock, shuddering at the feeling. He pushed his hips up, meeting Die's direction of movement.

It honestly took an embarrassingly short period of time before Die's orgasm crashed into him. It happened so out of the blue that he honestly had no idea what was going on until it was happening, and he nearly choked on the air he tried to gasp into his lungs as he began to spurt.

Kyo watched Die's face and could see him falling apart. He moved a bit faster, watching as his lover's cock erupted onto his stomach and chest. He didn't stop his actions, intent on finding his own end as he fucked up between Die's ass cheeks.

Die was left gasping and shivering, the crease between his brow deepening and then smoothing out as his orgasm flooded his body, providing him a great outlet and incredible stress relief. He remained in place, eyelids at half-mast, looking for all the world like the most debauched Greco-Roman sculpture in history.

Kyo gazed up at Die as he continued moving, his breath coming in pants as he neared his orgasm. 

It took another minute but then he was crying out, stilling as his cock spurted up Die's crack. He groaned and rocked his hips up slowly, sliding his dick in the mess even as he was still cumming, the head of his length pressing against Die's entrance then pulling away.

Die moaned as Kyo started to cum, closing his eyes and simply enjoying the sensation of having Kyo's cum splattering against warm skin in such a way. He drew his lower lip into his mouth, looking pleased as all fuck.

Kyo stilled finally and slumped back against the bed, breathing out a sigh. He stared up at Die for a few seconds then closed his eyes, unable to keep them open.

Easing himself down next to his lover, Die reached to tug the covers up over them and nuzzled into his lover's side. "I love you... more than I could rationally express, and I can only hope to ever show you a fraction of that."

Kyo shifted around, ignoring the mess on his stomach and dick. He curled up against Die, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "My sweet Koi. I love you as much and more."

"Sleep," Die murmured quietly, his hand finding Kyo's and grasping it tightly. "Stay all night. Don't leave." It was clear the alcohol had finally caught up with him along with his tiredness, creating an interesting sort of effect, seeming to draw him toward the past. "Don't ever leave... I waited too long for you, for this... for us."

Kyo bit his lip hard as Die implored him not to leave. It was unusual to say the least. Why would he think he would leave? 

The vocalist squeezed Die's hand tightly. "I'm not going anywhere, Daisuke. Ever."

"I love you, Tooru," Die returned quietly, just before he faded off into a rather abrupt sleep, obviously far too exhausted for his own good.

Kyo murmured a reply then laid there, his brow furrowed. Die was out within a minute, leaving him to his thoughts. It was nearly 3am before he finally drifted into a fitful sleep.


	84. Chapter 84

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

When it came to their private life, Die found that things always had a way of working themselves out. Even amidst all of his mistakes and the way he honestly fucked up pretty big sometimes, Kyo was a forgiving person, just as Die was. Which lead to things turning themselves around at the drop of a hat around their household. Die, honestly, was thankful for that on a daily basis and today was no exception.

They'd done a few interviews and promotional opportunities, but nothing really huge. And while Kyo was recording with Sukekiyo, he wasn't spending much more time there than he had with Dir en grey's recording of their last album.

As the New Year had come and gone, Die had found himself planning something and doing his best to figure out what to do for Kyo's birthday. When he'd found what he wanted to do, it had taken hours and hours of planning before he was satisfied. And at that point, it was actually a day early, but couldn't really be put off any longer. So, a day early, it was.

Now, he stood just inside the living room, waiting on Kyo to come home, leaning in the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest and a smirk on his lips. Overhead, delicate lights were strung from the ceiling, the shadows between the lights they cast forming Kyo's kanji on the far wall.

Kyo arrived home within 15 minutes of Die having finished up. He gathered up his bags from the store he'd run to and headed for the door. Upon opening it and stepping inside, he became so focused on getting his shoes off and wrangling the bags that he didn't notice Die nor the lights...at first. It was after he'd stepped up out of the entry that he finally saw his lover standing there. "Die, wha--?" He paused, looking up at the pretty lights and then their shadow, casting his kanji on the wall.

Die took the two steps forward it took to bring him even with Kyo, and he cupped his cheek, leaning in and kissing him delicately. "Happy early birthday, love."

Kyo kissed Die back, smiling against his lips before ducking his head. "Ah...thank you, darling." He reached up, stroking his hand over Die's cheek, a bright look in his eyes.

Grinning, Die slid his arm around Kyo's waist and led him through the house and up the stairs. Once they were there, he led him into the bathroom and flicked on the light, revealing he'd gotten Kyo a full set of Star Wars towels and that he'd run the bath for him, the water having a swirl of color in it and smelling of sandalwood and vanilla, lotus petals floating on top.

Kyo let Die lead him up the stairs, the scent of sandalwood drifting from somewhere near the bathroom. When he was taken into said room, he spotted the Star Wars towels and couldn't help but grinning widely. "Oh, wow...be still, my secret geek heart." He laughed then turned, looking at the tub with its bath bomb and lotus petals. "And that is…incredibly romantic..."

Die gently began to strip off the other's clothing, going as slowly as he could to see if there was any pushback from him. He wetted his lips as he worked, first removing Kyo's jacket and then reaching around to get his belt unfastened. "Yes, yes it is."

Kyo couldn't keep the grin off his face as Die began undressing him. He held out his arms helpfully to get his jacket off then watched as his lover's hands moved to his belt. He leaned back into him slightly, his hand brushing over the top of Die's. "Am I supposed to let you pamper me?"

"Mmmhmm," Die rumbled as he opened Kyo's pants and then stepped back and around him to reach for his shirt. "Arms up." And with that, he removed the piece of fabric, sliding it over his head and letting it fall into the hamper.

Kyo chuckled and raised his arms as he was asked then lowering them once his chest was bare. He shivered slightly, goosebumps prickling his skin. He shifted in a better stance for Die to get his pants off, a slightly pervy grin on his lips. "Gonna get my outta my pants now?"

Die flicked his eyes up at Kyo as he knelt down and began to remove his lover's pants. He licked his lips and then shifted to hold the pants as he got them around his ankles. "Go ahead; step out."

Kyo smirked faintly then stepped out of his pants, using Die's shoulder briefly for balance. Once he was out of them, he let go and stood there once more, his underwear the last barrier between him and the air.

Die stood, emptying Kyo's pockets onto the counter and then removing the belt before dumping the pants into the hamper. He coiled up the belt, smirking. "Take your underwear off, and get in the bath, darling."

Kyo watched as Die emptied his pockets then grinned as he moved over to the tub. He stepped into the warm water slowly, sinking down with a sigh. "Oh, this is...luxurious."

Stepping over to the tub, Die plopped down a small pillow he pulled off the top of the toilet. He knelt down on it and just leaned his arms on the edge of the tub, watching Kyo with a small smile on his lips.

Kyo sat there for a few minutes, letting his body soak. He'd assumed Die would be joining him, so when his lover knelt down on a pillow instead, he turned and peered at him, eyebrows raised in question.

Die smiled at him. "It's your bath, darling. Stretch out and enjoy it. Relax... and if you desire something, let me know."

Kyo looked at Die for a moment then shrugged, finally leaning back fully in the tub with a sigh. He let the scent of the water and lotus blossoms wash over him, take him away for a bit. He finally opened his eyes again after a few moments, looking over at Die with a smile. "This is so lovely, darling."

"Mmm... I'm glad." Die looked content himself, leaning there, eyelids half closed as he just watched Kyo relax. "You're not gonna believe your cake... the things I had to learn... seriously." Die chuckled.

Kyo reached out, placing one wet hand on Die's. "Cake? You...made me a cake, love?"

"I did." Die's eyes were sparkling as he grinned at Kyo. "And you'll see."

Kyo smiled, his eyes lighting up with the action as his heart swelled with affection for the red head. "You're too good to me..."

Die just beamed at Kyo, taking in a deep breath and then settling again as he peered over the edge of the tub.

Kyo relaxed for a few more minutes before sitting up and reaching for the loofah, offering it to Die. "Wash my back?"

The redhead moved then, taking the loofah and shifting around to get to Kyo's back, starting to wash it in gentle circles.

Kyo shifted then leaned forward for Die, breathing out a sigh. "Mm, I really should have you do this more often."

"Mmm, then it wouldn't be a special occasion thing?" Die chuckled as he dipped the loofah to get more water and then start scrubbing again, his touch gentle.

Kyo chuckled. "True enough." He sat still while Die scrubbed his skin then finally turned, giving the other a little lopsided grin. "This side now?"

Smirking, Die did his level best with Kyo's torso, but only gave him a brief once-over down below the water line before handing over the sponge and settling back to watch him.

Kyo laughed softly at the quick once-over then took over to finish cleaning himself up. Once he was finished, he hung the sponge back up and sat back. "Mm, so...when's cake served?"

"Now-ish?" Standing up, Die dusted his knees off and skirted around the cats, who had curled up on the rug. "Be aware there's two fuzzballs on the rug." He picked up Kyo's towel and brought it back to him, standing there with it while he waited on the other to get out of the tub.

Kyo hummed and pushed himself up, leaning over to let the water out of the tub. "There's always two fuzzballs on the rug when we take baths." He took the towel, patting himself mostly dry before stepping out of the tub and finishing the job. 

He tied the towel around his waist then peered at Die. "Should I _dress_ dress or would lounge pants be fine?"

"Lounge pants are fine, darling." Die leaned over and pecked Kyo's lips. "See you downstairs in five." With that, he made his way around the cats and out the door, heading downstairs.

Kyo returned the quick kiss then nodded. "Okay." He moved to hang up the towel then combed his hair before tugging on his lounge pants. Once he'd done that, he headed downstairs, humming happily.

Die stood just inside the kitchen, the lights dimmed and a faint flickering coming from behind him, obviously the work of some candles. He grinned when Kyo arrived and stepped back. "Happy birthday, my love." On the table sat a very lovely cake, perfectly shaped numbers from fruit on top of it and a tiny chocolate plaque on top with Kyo's name, obviously in Die's handwriting. Two candles sat on either side of the chocolate plank, lit and filling the kitchen with interesting designs.

Kyo took in the flickering light and smiled, stepping into the kitchen to see his cake. The confection was intricately decorated and beautiful, looking nothing like a homemade product and more like something from a store. His face split into a wide grin as he stepped closer, examining it then turning back to Die, pulling his lover close and kissing him hard on the mouth. "It's beautiful, Die. Stunning..."

Die was grinning so hard his face felt like it was going to split. "You would not believe how many times I had to cut fruit to get it to behave."

Kyo chuckled, moving back to the cake. "I can't imagine...can I blow out the candles?"

"Please do, before it melts the sign." Die laughed, pulling out a chair and gesturing Kyo into it.

Kyo smiled and settled into the chair, closing his eyes to make his wish before leaning forward. In one breath, he blew out the candles, opening his eyes again and turning to Die. Die produced a knife and two plates, along with a scooper. He placed them in front of Kyo and then held out the knife, handle toward his lover. Kyo took the knife, biting his lip and studying the cake for a moment before selecting a space and carefully cutting two equal pieces. He reached his hand out for the scoop. "Look good?"

"Trust me, it looked good the whole time." Die handed over the scoop and then pulled two forks from the center island of the table. "Not eating it was hard."

Kyo laughed, scooping the pieces onto the plates then setting one beside him. He reached up and grabbed one of the fruit numbers, biting into it with a smile.

Die picked up the kiwi number and gently placed it on Kyo's plate as well. "I ate enough fruit fuck ups to last me a while." He laughed and then took a bite of the cake.

Kyo snorted and finished off the melon before finally taking a bite of the cake. A near erotic moan left him as he chewed, finding it incredibly moist and delicious. "Oh Die...wow..."

Die winked at Kyo and licked icing off his fork. "Hey, baby, like my cake?"

Kyo finished his bite and swallowed. "Damn straight I do. If you ever get to where you can't play, I insist you open a bake shop." He took another bite and sat there, looking rather pleased as he ate it.

"Aww, you flatter me." Die took another bite. "Though... you might be right. I could make a living that way."

Kyo hummed, unable to speak as he'd already shoved another bite into his mouth, icing on the corner of his lips.

Die leaned over and took the icing from the corner of his lip, sucking it off his finger. "I feel I should point out that none of this is store bought except... well, obviously the whole fruit and the chocolate square, but I did the writing.

Kyo grinned then cocked his head. "You even made the icing?"

"I did, from scratch."

Kyo reached over and grabbed Die's hand, squeezing it then pulling it up to his lips to kiss the back of it. "Wow, babe...this is just...phenomenal."

Beaming, Die breathed out, "For you, it's always worth it."

Kyo set his fork down and leaned in, kissing Die softly. "I love you. You're amazing...and too good to me."

"No such thing as too good to you!"

Kyo shook his head, brushing his hand through Die's hair.

Die ate the last bite of his own cake and did his best to stop blushing like a schoolboy before he cleared his throat and picked up his plate and fork, carting them to the sink. With that, he came back and plopped in his chair, pulling out his phone and flicking through a couple of tiles before selecting a movie app and pulling it up.

Kyo picked up his fork, licking the last bit of icing from it then watch Die. "Now what're you doing? More surprises?"

"Hmm?" Die glanced up and then laughed. "Nah, I thought maybe you'd like to watch a movie so I was seeing what's on pay per view or digital rental."

Kyo hummed and stood up, putting his own dishes in the sink before going to stand behind Die, sliding his arms around the other's shoulders. "Whatever you want to watch is fine with me...as long as it's something we've seen."

Die released a laugh, tilting his head back to stare up at Kyo, his head against his chest. "Oh? Why is that?"

The vocalist leaned down and kissed Die's nose. "Because I plan on being distracted during it." He pulled back and grinned.

"Mmm, how about we forego the movie then? What exactly do you want in the... distraction department today?"

Kyo chuckled and moved around, sliding into Die's lap. "I want to repay you for the wonderful birthday..." He leaned in, pressing his face against Die's neck, kissing the skin there.

Die chuckled, holding onto Kyo's hips. "That's now how that's supposed to work, you know." Not that he sounded like he was objecting in his tone of voice.

Kyo hummed, kissing up to Die's earlobe and nipping it. "I know but it's _my_ birthday, and I can do what I want...and what I want to do is you." He pulled back then, grinning at his own ridiculous pun.

Pulling Kyo down a bit closer to him, he nuzzled in against his neck. "Mm... tell me how you want me, baby. I want to hear you say all the dirty things you want to do to me."

The vocalist ran his fingers over Die's neck, licking his lips. "You want to hear all of the dirty things? That's a very long list, darling. How about I just start with saying I want you to eat my ass right here on the table?"

Die let out a soft whimper and then reached around to squeeze said ass. "Then turn around and pull your pants down. Not off... just down to your thighs."

Kyo grunted at the squeeze then slid off of Die's lap. He turned around and pushed his pants down, exposing his ass before leaning over the table, shifting around until he was comfortable.

Die released a soft chuckle and then knelt down, licking his lips before he parted Kyo's cheeks and just lightly blew air across his tight bud. Kyo gave a shiver as the air passed over his entrance, his stomach tight with anticipation. For a moment, Die just teased Kyo that way before he turned his head and firmly bit his left ass cheek with a groan.

The way Die was teasing him had Kyo squirming, his dick slowly hardening. The bite to his cheek had him gasping and pushing back, seeking more of the rough treatment. "Die..."

Die licked the area he'd just bitten and then buried his face against Kyo's ass, tongue licking hard over his entrance.

Kyo unleashed a loud cry as Die's tongue finally touched him, his hole clenching. A shudder rippled down his spine as he scrambled for a better grip on the table, his hips pushing back. " _Yes!_ "

The way the other reacted to him had Die feeling high on what he was doing. He licked diligently, finally pulling back and leaning over Kyo's asshole, starting to dribbled spit down into his crack, a smirk on his face as he watched the saliva slide down over his crack and then down his balls.

Kyo couldn't help but squirm and writhe against the table. Die's actions were driving him crazy with pleasure, his cock hard and leaking pre-cum from the tip. He let out a moan when the other pulled back, ready to beg for more. The feeling of saliva dripping down his crack stopped him and instead drew a whimper from his lips as the fluid traversed down to his sac. "Oh…gods..."

The smirk on Die's face only grew when Kyo released such a pleased array of noises and words. It seemed he'd been right in assuming he might like that sort of thing. Leaning down, he licked from his sac upwards, pushing the tip of his tongue into his hole and then pulling back up to repeat the process, hovering just above him and slowly letting saliva drip down his crack again.

Kyo groaned as Die's tongue moved over his sac and then pushing into his twitching hole. He wriggled against the table, fighting the urge to hump the air as he felt yet another line of spit drip down his crack.

Die pulled back this time, watching the saliva trail down his ass and over his balls before he smacked his ass harshly and then spread him again, flicking the point of his tongue over his hole repeatedly.

Kyo had barely enough time to process the feeling of Die's spit reaching his balls before Die's hand slapped his ass harshly. His cry of shock quickly turned into a long moan as Die's tongue flicked over his pucker. His hips jerked and he bucked back, panting heavily against the table. "F-fuck! Die…please...oh God!"

Die pushed his face against him closer and kept flicking his tongue, eager to give Kyo exactly what he wanted, even if his tongue was getting tired quickly. The thought that he'd gotten out of practice at eating someone out crossed his mind, and he nearly wanted to laugh, redoubling his efforts.

Kyo couldn't even think as he writhed there with Die's tongue on his ass. His cock was so hard it nearly hurt, pre-cum dripping steadily from the tip. He knew he could cum just like this, just from Die's tongue, and the thought had him crying out. He didn't want to lose it though, not yet. "Die...God...st-stop...so close..."

The moment Kyo asked him to stop, Die pulled back, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He pushed himself up and leaned over Kyo's body, sliding his hands along his sides and up to his arms, holding onto his forearms as he slowly rocked against his ass, his own cock obviously quite hard. "Talk to me, baby...."

Kyo whined as Die pulled back, his hips pushing back then settling as he panted. He shivered, shifting on the table a bit as Die rocked against him. "You're so hard...just from eating my ass?" 

"I am," Die breathed out, rocking against Kyo the moment he started moving.

Kyo groaned, rolling his hips. "Fuck me. Fuck me so hard it leaves bruises."

Die's fingers tightened on Kyo's arms, holding them down as he rutted against him. "What would you do if I just did this until I jizzed my pants instead, hmm?"

Kyo flexed against Die's hold, rocking back against him as his lover's clothed cock ran over his crack. He groaned, shaking his head, huffing out a breath. "I would probably cum anyway but be greatly less satisfied...."

Chuckling, Die leaned down to nip at Kyo's shoulder before letting go of one of his arms and reaching down to unzip his pants, moving his underwear aside to free his cock. He spit in his hand a few times and slathered it on his cock, wiping the rest off onto his hip and then holding his cock steady as he pressed it against Kyo's asshole. He didn't push in yet, waiting on the opportune moment.

The vocalist lay prone against the table, letting Die's hand keep him held down as he listened to him undo his pants. When he felt Die pressing against his hole, he moaned, attempting to push back against him. "Please Die... _fuck_ me."

The instant the last word was out of Kyo's mouth, Die pushed into his lover, forcefully. The tabled moved slightly from the power of his thrust, and he grunted before he began to fuck him hard enough his wallet chain started to clink against his leg.

Immense pleasure washed over Kyo as Die thrust into his body. He cried out loudly enough that it echoed off the kitchen walls. He grasped the edge of the table, holding onto it as Die fucked him hard in just the way he wanted.

"Keep talking to me, baby." Die pushed his mouth against the other's shoulder, planting wet kisses there.

Kyo was finding it impossible to think beyond Die's cock thrusting into him but still, he gave a moan and turned his head back. "Your cock feels so fucking good in my ass....never want it to stop," he panted out, his hips jerking nearly violently.

Die let out a groan, spreading his legs even more and fucking into him faster, his forehead pressing against his back. His breathing was hard, arousal already setting in hard for him.

Kyo was mindless with pleasure as Die fucked him, half sentences coupled with moans spilling from his lips as he fought to keep some form of control over himself. It was futile, though, and soon he was letting out another loud cry as he started cumming. His ass clenched tightly around Die's cock as spurt after spurt left him to spatter on the floor beneath the table.

"Ah, yeah, baby... you're cumming for me even though I've not even touched your dick, aren't you?" Die spread his legs a bit more and shifted his angle, abusing Kyo's prostate with the newest angle, intent to make him desperate to stop the pleasure as it overwhelmed him.

Kyo opened his mouth to respond but could only moan as Die tortured his prostate. His cock gave another spurt of fluid and a harsh shudder went through him as he moaned. He was limp against the table, panting hard, whines escaping him as Die continued to fuck his sensitive body. "Die...I...oh gods!"

Die just kept at him as hard as he could, already going too fast to get himself off without ramping up properly. But that wasn't the point yet. No... he just wanted to fuck him until Kyo couldn’t stand it.

Kyo tried to withstand the way Die was going after him. He clawed at the table, alternately crying out and whimpering as intense pleasure rolled over him. It was finally too much though, and he shook his head, flailing his arm. "Please...too much...."

Die pulled out, took a step to the side and plopped in the chair, immediately grabbing his dick and starting to stroke himself slowly, watching Kyo with bright eyes and a smirk on his lips.

Kyo slumped against the table when Die pulled out, his body trembling from the intensity of it all. He was, much to his surprise, still hard, cum coating the head of his cock. "F-fuck."

"Come sit on the floor in front of me," Die murmured quietly, his voice toned to leave room for Kyo to deny him.

Kyo debated for a moment before finally shifting back and putting his weight on legs that were far too shaky for his liking. He quickly slid to the floor in front of Die, gazing up at him through glazed over eyes.

Die stopped stroking himself and reached, instead, to lightly pet over Kyo's hair, a smile on his lips. "How you doin', birthday boy?"

Kyo gave Die a grin, turning his head to swipe his tongue over Die's wrist, which was all he could reach. "Fucking fantastic… and fantastically fucked."

"Good." Die lightly palmed his own cock, just resting his hand there as he kept stroking over Kyo's hair. "Tell me what else you want to do today."

Kyo shifted his gaze down to Die's cock, licking his lips. "Mm....round 2? Maybe 3?"

"Mmm, you already called mercy." Die hid his grin for all of a few seconds before it burst out.

Kyo glanced up at Die then pushed his bottom lip out slightly. "Because you were abusing my prostate just after I came...." He reached up, running his hands over Die's thighs. "Doesn't mean I can't recover..."

"Are you saying... you want me so bad you're already wanting another go?" Die teased.

Kyo narrowed his eyes and shifted up onto his knees. "Mm...or you could just be hard all by yourself while I go take a shower..." He smirked a bit, dragging his nails over the fabric of Die's pants.

"Or I could shove your dirty mouth over my fuckin' dick and force you to suck me off."

Pure, hot lust flashed in Kyo's eyes as Die spoke. A groan escaped him before he could stop it as he looked up at Die. "I fucking dare you..."

Die didn't miss the look in his lover's eyes, and without a second of hesitation he grabbed Kyo’s hair roughly and shoved him face-first toward his crotch. Holding his dick steady, he forced it into Kyo's mouth and began to move Kyo's head via his hold on his hair.

Heat shot straight to Kyo’s dick as Die grabbed him by the hair. He gagged slightly at first but then recovered, letting Die fuck his mouth while he sucked him as well as he could.

"That's right," Die purred out. "Take every single bit of my cock, darling." He pushed him down on his dick again and again, throwing his head back and moaning as he face-fucked his lover.

Kyo brought his hands up to grip Die's thighs, swallowing around his cock as it was forced down his throat. He moaned, flicking his eyes up to his lover's face.

There wasn't a thing in the world that could have stopped Die right then. He held the side of the chair seat with one hand and began humping his hips upward repeatedly before his breath caught and a second later, he was cumming, trembling with the force of it.

Kyo relished watching as Die came undone. He moaned around him, focusing on repeatedly swallowing as his lover began cumming down his throat.

Die pulled back as soon as he'd given Kyo his load, his cock slipping from his mouth as he stared at his lover, eyes flicking down to Kyo's hard cock. "One rule... do not touch yourself." With that, he stood up and skirted around the other, going out onto the patio and then wandering around the bushes to the other side where he began to relieve himself against the wall.

Kyo licked his lips, gazing up at Die before nodding, an anticipatory shiver going through him. He stayed where he was for a moment before standing and shucking off his pants completely. After that, he followed Die outside, smirking when he heard the sound of piss hitting the wall.

Die finished up quickly, tucking himself back in and zipping up before he moved to reach in the planter, pulling out a cigarette from the pack there and fishing the cheap plastic lighter out as well, flicking it a few times before it lit up, and he touched the flame to the tip of the cigarette. He took one deep drag and then held it out to Kyo, wordlessly, a tiny smirk on his lips.

Kyo stood there, naked and hard, watching Die light up a cigarette, a slight amount of surprise in his gut. Instant longing coursed through him, and he didn't even hesitate to reach out and grab the stick. He brought it to his lips and dragged on it deeply, something like ecstasy crossing his face as he blew the smoke out in a slow steady stream.

Die turned then, waiting on Kyo to take another drag before he moved in to kiss him, letting the smoke swirl between their mouths as his tongue flickered lightly over Kyo's own.

Kyo kissed Die back, groaning softly as they shared the smoke between them. He reached out with his free hand, catching Die's hip and pulling him closer as they kissed.

Releasing his lover, Die nipped at his lower lip and then smiled softly. "Not just a cigarette... so we're clear before you get too far."

Kyo's eyes widened at Die's words, and he paused for a moment to really taste what he'd inhaled. A soft sound left him as he finally noticed the herbal quality to it, and he chuckled lowly. "Mmm, I see...a treat from Boss?"

"Nah... leftover, and I just tapped some of the tobacco out and then re-stuffed it with a mix and tapped them back down." His lips twitched a little. "With the amount we've been busy, it's more satisfying for me sometimes to get a little buzzed and have some alone time than just watching porn or whatever." He sniffed. "I don't do it often, don't worry... and usually only a couple drags so it's a super short buzz."

Kyo hummed softly and brought the modified cigarette up to his lips again, pulling deeply from it then holding it for a few seconds. He exhaled slowly before leaning in to kiss Die again, grabbing his wrist, tugging it towards his crotch. "I'm already so hard...this is just icing on the cake."

Die stretched a little and studied the other carefully. "Romance or domination? We're bouncing between them it seems."

Kyo bit his lip, considering his options. The evening had started with romance but now, after being so thoroughly fucked by Die, dominance seemed to be more what he wanted. "Domination... _if_ that path is okay for you..."

"How far up in the spectrum?" Die took the cigarette from him and took a long drag from it before passing it back.

"Whatever you want....carte blanche. I'll take as much or as little as you feel like giving." He took the cigarette and pulled on it again, his eyes hooding slightly as he started to feel the buzz.

Die wetted his lips, pilfered the cigarette back and took one more hearty drag of it before handing it back, smoke streaming from his mouth as he spoke. "Finish this, all the way down, and then meet me in the bedroom." With that, he walked off, leaving Kyo in their small yard.

Kyo watched Die, his eyes focused on his lover's lips as the smoke spilled from them. He groaned as he took the cigarette back, nodding. Without a care, he sat, naked, on the lawn chair to finish off the rest of the cigarette. It took him ten minutes to finally finish it off. He snuffed it out against the concrete, tossing the end into the trash by the door as he headed back inside and upstairs, anticipation bubbling up within him. Kyo approached the closed bedroom door, pausing for a moment before opening it up.

Die was waiting in the bedroom, the door closed. He'd changed into a pair of tight red leather pants and was shirtless, his hair pulled back to the nape of his neck in a tie. A small box sat open on the dresser beside him, various implements inside. In his hands, he held a black body wax candle and a lighter.

The sight that greeted Kyo took his breath away and sent heat straight to his crotch. "Dear gods...," he breathed out, his eyes fixated on Die's red leather pants.

Die pointed at the floor at his feet. "Strip and kneel."

Kyo moved into the room and kneeled at Die's feet, settling back on his heels.

Lighting the candle, Die squatted down in front of Kyo and took his arm, holding it out as he waited on the wax to start dripping over him, the inside of his wrist first to test the waters.

Kyo watched Die light the candle then watched as the wax began to melt. The first drop landed on his wrist with a soft "plop", a small intake of breath being the only reaction he made.

Die righted the candle and snapped his fingers, pointing toward the rug. "Lie down on your back."

The instant Die snapped his fingers, Kyo did as he was commanded. He lay down on his back, staring up at the other, unable to help squirming in anticipation.

Die stood over Kyo, towering now that he was the only one even remotely upright. Once there was a good amount of wax, he flicked it at Kyo's naked body, watching it land across his abdomen, one splatter on his hip.

Kyo gasped then jerked as the wax spattered onto his skin. The heat was enough to burn but only for a second, the rapidly cooling wax making his skin tingle where it had landed.

Die kept it dripping over Kyo's hip, across to the other and then righted it again. He waited this time, watching, until Kyo wasn't paying any attention and then he carefully aimed his drizzle of wax, letting it slide down the sides of his shaft, but not over the head, conscious of where it would come off from and where it could cause an issue.

Kyo soaked up the pleasure pain from the wax hitting his skin, shivering faintly when it would hit a particularly sensitive spot like the juncture of his thigh. 

He relaxed against the floor, his eyes sliding closed for just a moment before heat hit his cock, and he cried out, his hips jerking upward. It hurt, but at the same time his cock throbbed, and he arched his back up for more.

Die smirked at the way the other clearly was getting something out of this. He licked his lips and tilted his head, moving the wax down to Kyo's relatively hairless balls and flicked a stream of wax over them, just waiting on the pain to lance through his lover, sympathy making his own balls ache from what he'd just done.

The next hit of wax was considerably more painful, and Kyo nearly screamed at the intensity of it. He found himself squirming on the floor, almost certainly giving himself rug burn on his back. "Oh gods!"

Breathless, Die flicked the candle again, watching the wax splash over his lover's body. Something drew him to the act, pushed him further into what he was doing as he tipped it again and swirled some around his lover's abdomen, dripping a careful path down and across his inner thigh. Kyo was a canvas and Die the artist.

The vocalist cried out again, his body jerking this way and that as the wax seared his skin. His stomach muscles quivered as he shuddered with each drip of the wax, the pain shooting straight to his cock bringing him glorious pleasured pain.

Die moved then, kneeling beside Kyo's head. He reached and grasped the vocalist's jaw, holding his head still as he looked between the candle and Kyo's eyes. "Speak now or hold silent, no matter what I do in these next few seconds."

Kyo stared up at Die, his eyes widening, his breath coming in pants. He almost stopped him, the tiniest bit of fear making his pulse skitter in his veins. He didn't though, simply swallowed and nodded his head as he clenched his jaw shut.

Kyo's jaw being clenched gave Die pause to reconsider his actions, rebuild what he wanted to do given that his previous game plan was off the table for the moment. 

Wetting his own lips, he smirked down at him and then pushed his head back, splashing the large amount of wax that had built up onto Kyo's throat. Right across his Adam's apple, it splattered and ran, dripping down the sides of his neck toward the floor.

Kyo watched Die's face, the smirk there letting him know his lover was enjoying this about as much as he was. He drew in a breath just as the wax was tipping out of the candle, a muffled scream sounding in his throat as it hit his Adam's apple. He shuddered, his cock twitching against his belly even as his skin burned.

Die slid his own finger through the wax on the candle, coating it before he snuffed the candle with two fingers and tapped the rest of the wax out on Kyo's belly. Settling between his legs, he began to run the wax-coated finger over the slit of Kyo's dick.

Kyo groaned, opening his mouth to release his breath in pants, his hands grappling at the floor. "Fuck, Die!" He pushed his hips up, pre-cum oozing from the tip of his dick onto Die's finger.

Die puffed some breath over Kyo's dick, hoping the cooling sensation might provide the other with some pleasure.

The breath over his cock caused Kyo to shiver and release a quiet moan. He was achingly hard at this point, his balls tight against his body.

Die gently rubbed his fingertip over the other's cock, a small smirk on his face. Something about teasing the other was really getting him off.

Kyo peered at Die, the dried wax cracking and falling from his throat as he swallowed. The way his lover was touching him was becoming too much, and he found himself squirming, almost pulling away.

"Stay where you are." Die's voice was anything but gentle, utterly commanding in his requirement for him to stay still.

Kyo bit his lip and forced himself to be still though it was beyond difficult. He let out a whine, his hands clenched tight.

Die rubbed quicker across the head of his prick before he finally pulled his hand back and leaned down to lap at the tip, gathering up all the pre-cum.

Kyo wriggled and moaned, the intensity driving him crazy. When Die finally relented, he breathed out a sigh of relief only to start moaning again once his lover's tongue lapped over him instead.

Gently, Die closed his teeth against Kyo's length and then slid upward until he was just behind the head. He sucked lightly on the head and then pulled up to blow air across the head again.

The actions were just too much for Kyo. He cried out as Die's teeth scraped over him then pulled away again, the head of his cock ruddy at this point. "Oh gods..."

Licking over it once more, Die pulled back and stood up, moving to lean against the wall, just watching Kyo quietly.

Kyo shivered all over then settled against the floor, peering over at Die. He found his couldn't be still though, his hips rolling up, cock aching for release. It was all he could do not to grab himself.

Die watched him quietly for a while before murmuring, "I watched you the other day... during recording. And all I could think about was how much I wanted to put you into your place."

Die's words had Kyo's breath hitching in his throat, his cock twitching at the mere thought. He bit his lip then released it. "Yeah? What would you have done?"

"Oh... I'm doing it." Die flashed him a naughty look and then turned on his heel, walking into their walk-in closet and closing the door behind himself.

Kyo blinked the huffed out a breath as Die walked into the closet. He stayed as he was for a few moments then shifted, taking deep breaths to calm himself, bring himself back from the edge. He knew Die would probably push him back towards it all too soon.

When Die opened the door again, he was wearing the most low-slung pair of jeans he knew Kyo apriciated, with absolutely nothing underneath, the top of three buttons undone... and not a stitch of clothing beyond that. He held a length of very smooth rope in his hands, stretched taut between them.

Kyo turned when the closet door open and the sight that greeted him had his mouth falling open. His lover stood there looking like pure sin and all he wanted to do right then was taste every inch of his bared skin. It took him a few moments to notice the rope but when he did, arousal surged through him hard and an involuntary moan escaped him. "Oh..."

Moving quickly across the room, Die straddled Kyo's chest and leaned down to kiss him, distracting him from the way he slipped the rope under his neck. Sitting back, he pulled the rope up and crossed it in the front before slowly starting to tighten it, pulling the ends in opposite directions, a glint in his eyes. "This is your place, love... beneath my rope."

Kyo breathed out a sigh as Die settled on his chest and kissed him. He didn't notice the rope until it was closing around his throat, pulling a soft moan from his lips. He gazed up at Die, lips parted as he took in his lover's words. "Always," he whispered, his hands going to squeeze Die's thighs.

Die's gaze found Kyo's hands, and he studied them as he slowly tightened the rope. "Do you have any idea how hard it was to get myself into these pants? All your fault... my dick so hard it would barely stay put." He gave Kyo a naughty look and then breathed, "I want to choke you until you're squeezing my thighs so hard it bruises."

Kyo very nearly moved his hands with the way Die was looking at them. The rope closed tighter around his neck, making it harder and harder for him to breath, to think. He gave a strangled whine, his hips jerking upward as his fingers tightened with the rope. "Do...it..." he basically mouthed, unable to get sound out.

"It's going to make you cum, isn't it?" Die's fingers pulled the rope even tighter, his pulse skittering with what he was doing, the sheer violence of the act getting him off. A shudder went through him as he let out a snarl and pulled abruptly tighter.

Kyo's hips jerked up harder as pain and desperation mixed with his arousal. He dug his hands hard into Die's thighs, making gasping sounds as his head pushed back instinctively as if to get away from the rope. Then, everything went black, and he was floating in a haze of sheer pleasure as his cock erupted. He wanted to scream but couldn't even move.

Die's cock throbbed as he watched Kyo's face redden and then grow darker. The rope around his neck made him want to hold onto it and fuck himself on the other's dick... which was, perhaps, the opposite of what he should have been thinking about right then. His lover's eyes rolled back and cum splashed over his back.

Licking his lips, he eased up on the rope, despite the beast inside him not wanting to. He let it go and cupped Kyo's cheek, breathing out, "Talk to me, gorgeous."

The moment Die eased the rope, Kyo took in a deep breath, letting out a slight cough before gazing up at his lover. He was panting and still humping the air despite having just cum. "Please....fuck me....claim me!"

Die shifted then, standing up and unfastening his pants. He shoved them down and knelt between Kyo's thighs. Slicking his cock with Kyo's cum, he pressed it against his ass and breathed, "You'll take my cock, and you'll fucking love it."

Kyo, perhaps too eagerly, spread his legs for Die, welcoming him between them. He pushed down against Die's cock, staring up into his eyes. "Fuck. Me."

"If it weren't the opposite of what I wanted, I would stop right here and now for that _demand_ you just uttered." With that, Die shoved himself into Kyo's body and without a second's pause, began to thrust with complete abandon, seeking his own pleasure in what he was doing.

Kyo very nearly smirked but didn't get the chance as he was soon screaming with pleasure at Die's cock entering his body. He didn't hesitate to reach up and grasp Die's shoulders, digging his nails in in a bit of retaliation, practically begging for more punishment.

Die instantly swiped up Kyo's wrist, turning his arm outward to the near point of hurting him, letting out another snarl. "Don't you dare mark me like that." He leaned forward and hissed out, "You're _mine_ to mark up."

Kyo cried out again, a quick shot of pain going up his arm. He dropped his other hand, grappling at the rug instead as his body arched off the ground. "Fuck!"

"Mine, you hear that!" Die rammed into him again and again, groaning as he continued to fuck him as hard as he possibly could.

Kyo finally gave up trying to be remotely quiet and, with every other breath, began crying out various versions of Die's name. Intense pleasure surged through him as Die fucked him so brutally.

Pulling out, Die grabbed Kyo's leg and wrenched him over onto his front. Yanking his ass up in the air, he plunged back in and started thrusting quickly, desperate to get himself off at this point.

Kyo immediately shoved his ass in the air, pushing back hard against Die as he pillowed his head on his arms. "Fuck, yes!"

Die gave it a few more intense thrusts and then stopped, shuddering and then moaning as he started to cum, spurt after spurt of cum spilling into Kyo's asshole.

Kyo whined loudly when Die stopped, his hips pushing back against him again as he felt his lover cumming within him. "YES! Fill me with your cum! Claim from the inside out!"

Die finished with a grunt and then pulled out, spanking Kyo's ass so hard that his hand stung. Wringing his hand a little, he mouthed out, "Fuckin' a!" though not a word came from his mouth. Pursing his lips, he settled back and studied the handprint he'd left behind.

Kyo whimpered at the spank to his ass and the loss of Die's cock within him. He slumped forward slightly, panting hard as his ass stung. "Die," he whined softly.

"You already came, bitch." Die plunked down against the dresser and shoved his foot against Kyo's thigh. "Get yourself off if you want it so damn bad."

Kyo turned his head back to look at Die, staring at him for a few moments. He sniffed then turned back, closing his eyes and concentrating for a minute. Suddenly, piss started leaking from his cock, staining the carpet beneath him. He smirked against his arm, wondering just what Die would do with that.

It took Die a moment to notice it. When he did, he arched an eyebrow, just watching him do it. Nothing was going to make him stop this, no matter what.

Kyo pushed his ass up a bit, spreading his legs more as he pissed, a shudder going through him. He let out a low groan as he forced it out, finally sighing as the last drops left his body.

Die studied the puddle under Kyo and then leaned forward, sliding his index finger over the head of Kyo's cock, gathering up the droplets of piss still left there. Licking it off his finger, he chuckled. "You think you're going to get punished. But you're not."

Kyo's cock flexed as Die touched it, a little sound leaving him. When Die announced he wouldn't be punished his jerked his head around, staring at his lover with some amount of surprise on his face.

"What? You thought I'd punish you for something I wanted you to do?" Smirking, Die pushed himself up off the floor and padded toward the bed, running his hands over his thighs. Plunking down on the bed, he looked again at the puddle under Kyo. "Sit in it."

Kyo bit his lip, hesitating for a moment before finally shifting to sit in the rapidly cooling puddle. He shivered as he stared up at Die, his cock still hard between his legs.

Die watched him sit down and then chuckled. "Good job, darlin’." He licked his lips faintly and then just studied Kyo quietly.

Kyo leaned back on his hands, shifting his gaze down to the wax covered skin between his thighs. The area beneath it was red, marking the outline of wax that had fallen off already. He wondered if his throat bore similar marks, especially now that Die had choked him so deliciously.

"Speak." Die leaned forward, clasping his hands in front of him as he did so.

Kyo looked back up to Die's face, licking his lips. "About what?"

"How you feel, what you're thinking... any of it."

Kyo tilted his head then smirked. "I'm feeling hard as a fucking rock...and I was thinking about the marks you've left on my skin and how fucking much I love it."

"Very good." Die stood and got himself arranged in his pants, fastening them up before coming to squat down next to Kyo, watching his face. "Touch your cock."

Kyo balanced himself on one hand and reached down to grab his length. He let out a soft moan as he ran his hand down to the base and back up, his hips jerking faintly.

Die waited, watching Kyo's face rather than his cock, a sultry, but faintly bored look on his face. Of course, that was honestly a play, nothing about Kyo possibly boring him.

Kyo stroked his thumb over the tip of his cock, shuddering before looking back up to Die's face. Something about the look he found there, the look that screamed Dom to him made his cock twitch.

After a few moments of Kyo touching his cock, Die actually looked toward the alarm clock next to the bed, sighing before looking back. "Faster. Always so slow about it."

Kyo pursed his lips, tempted to slow down all the more. He huffed out a breath and sped up his strokes, starting to really go after himself.

"Better." Die's eyes fell on Kyo's cock finally, watching him with the same bored look, though if one looked deep enough, they'd see the glimmer of pleasure in their depths.

Kyo grunted, shifting his position and spreading his legs. He started humping up into his hand, his breath coming in pants as his head tilted back some, eyes sliding shut.

Die leaned down and licked over the head of his cock before pulling away again and settling back.

Die's action pulled a cry from Kyo's lips, his body going rigid for a moment. He moved his hand faster, so close to tipping over the edge. "So close," he moaned out.

Holding out his hand, Die moved his fingers together in preparation to snap them. "When I snap my fingers... you cum. Understood? No until and not after."

Kyo opened his eyes to peer at Die's hand, nodding his head. "Hnng yes..." He moved his other hand to grasp his sac, squeezing a bit roughly as he jerked his cock so fast his hand was blur.

Die took a few moments, watching Kyo, and then snapped his fingers, a smirk painting his lips.

It took Kyo's brain a few seconds to register the snap but when it did, his body spasmed and suddenly he was cumming. He didn't stop moving his hand as his cock spurted out across the carpet and onto Die. "Oh fu...yes!"

Die watched him cum, an amused look on his face when it worked for him to snap his fingers like that. "Very nice." He wiped the cum off his jeans and held it out. "Lick it up."

Kyo finally removed his hand from his cock, leaning forward to grasp Die's hand. He drew his lover's fingers into his mouth, sucking the cum from them one by one.

Die waited patiently until Kyo was done and then grabbed his hair, wrenching him toward him and kissing him hard. The kiss started rough and demanding and ever so slowly crept into passionate and loving, achingly gentle. When he pulled back, he was usual Die again. "Happy birthday, gorgeous."

Kyo let out a surprised sound when he was yanked forward but soon he was melting into the kiss, his hand going to push into Die's hair. When they parted, he smiled softly, stroking Die's cheek. "Thank you, darling. It has been glorious."


	85. Chapter 85

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one off little snippet to plan a certain date ;) - forgive our choppiness, life got hectic around here (yeah as if it's settled down even now, eons later HA)  
> Beta: thehamhamheaven

The train car jerked to a stop, the soft ding of the emergency safety stop going off. Die winced and grasped the plastic handle harder, shifting uncomfortably. The collective sigh of the whole train met his ears, and he turned to sort of shield Kyo from the rest of the train. They could hide for a few minutes of a ride, but a huge, several hour stop... probably not. And he knew how much he didn't like having people randomly take his photo out in public.

Lost in his own mind for a few moments, Kyo barely noticed the stopping of the train until he lost his footing and face-planted into Die's back. A quiet huff left his lips as he peered around his lover, the red caution light catching his eyes. He pursed his lips, holding back a groan. "I sincerely hope this wasn't a jumper," he murmured, irritation lacing his tone.

"If it was... then us stopping for a while is just respect to someone who was so far gone in life that they couldn't see a light anywhere in their future." Die pulled his phone from his pocket and checked reception, pushing it back in just afterward.

The vocalist stared at Die's back for a moment then hummed, shifting slightly. "I know..." He chanced a glance around, hoping to see that everyone was still minding their business. The train car was mostly full of businessmen and women along with a couple of mothers with their children. However, there were at least three young adults that may or may not have recognized them, and it made him extremely uncomfortable to think they would be stuck for very long. Not to mention the morbidity of the situation if it was indeed some poor soul who ended life in such a gruesome way.

Shifting slightly in his stance, Die wetted his lips and glanced around the train, catching one of the girls looking at him. She looked away, blushing the moment he caught her gaze, and he made sure to firmly plant himself between Kyo and the group. "They'll announce it in a while, like always." Truth be told, it was a usual sort of state, having something like this happen at least a few times a month on various lines in the city, and most everyone was used to it in some fashion or other.

The shift in Die's stance confirmed Kyo's suspicions, and he reached to pull his hood up, tugging it around his face. He shoved his hands in his pockets to keep from absent mindedly touching Die and settled against the pole he'd been holding onto. "Yeah, probably another ten minutes or so..."

The minutes ticked by and occasionally, Die noticed the girl peering toward him again. She wasn't telling her friends, and she wasn't doing anything other than looking, but she definitely seemed to recognize him.

About twenty minutes later, everyone was growing grumpy, but the car lurched to a start again, slowly speeding up until they were rolling along as they'd been before the stop. He let out a sigh of relief and licked his lips lightly.

Kyo shifted around, growing impatient as time dragged on. He finally just closed his eyes and started to doze, knowing Die would keep him safe. 

He awoke with a jerk as the train began moving again, his hands coming up to rub his face. He gave a yawn then stood up fully, lightly tugging the back of Die's jacket. "How long were we there?"

"Twenty minutes or so." Die ran one hand over his face and then switched which arm was holding onto the strap. "My feet are starting to kill me though."

Kyo hummed, looking around the train again. He spotted one of the teenagers looking their way, clear recognition on her face. He breathed out a sigh, thankful that at least she didn't have her phone out and in their faces. "Yeah, who knew today would be the day we should have taken the car..."

"Always that chance." The train pulled into the next station and nearly everyone headed for the door. It wasn't their stop, so Die just took a seat once the others had left, giving a little wave to the girl who lifted a hand to him before she stepped off the train.

"Yep..." The train stopped again, and he looked out before following Die's example, settling in a seat. "At least we're on our way now." He leaned slightly against Die's shoulder, relaxing now that the car was emptier.

"Glorious," Die murmured faintly. "I'm glad we're moving... and that there's a seat." He nudged Kyo. "Guess what... I think I'm getting old."

Kyo chuckled softly, shaking his head. "I think I am, too. All I could think about was getting away from those kids."

Die yawned and then tilted his head back. "Mmm... is that all that unusual?"

The vocalist snorted, crossing his arms. "I suppose not...Mr. Smartass."

Chuckling, Die slid his tongue out to wet his lips and then looked back around at the other's in the train. "Want to hit up that stand that does Mexican on the way in? Sort of want a taco plate."

Kyo contemplated the food choice for a moment then nodded, reaching to rub his stomach. He'd only had a small breakfast so he was definitely ready for more substantial food. "That sounds like a wonderful plan."

The next few minutes were spent in silence until they arrived at the next platform and Die stood up, making his way out the door. As they emerged from the underground and into the bright light of midday, Die spread his arms and grinned at Kyo. "We've emerged!"

Kyo quickly followed Die, breathing in a breath of the fresh air and squinting at the sunlight. He adjusted his sunglasses and turned to Die, laughing softly. "Dork. Yes, we've finally emerged...thankfully."

As they walked along, Die found himself contemplating things he'd been keeping on the backburner for far longer than he'd ever meant to. He fell oddly silent as they meandered along.

Kyo found himself leading the way towards the food stand. He paused at a crosswalk and looked back at Die, his brow creasing faintly. The guitarist appeared to be in deep thought, though he couldn't imagine why. 

Another block brought them face to face with their destination, the scent of foreign spices hanging in the air. His stomach growled and he clasped a hand over it, huffing. "At this rate, a taco plate isn't going to be enough."

Die smirked at Kyo as they got in line. "Yeah... they have large taco plates, trust me." He snorted. "You know, I used to make a completely different crack about tacos back in the day."

Kyo peered at the menu, mulling over the choices for a moment before cracking up at Die's remark. "Yeah, I bet. Look, they have fish tacos, too." He smirked, amused at his own innuendo.

"And there it is," Die returned, smirking to himself. "Exactly how I put it." He stepped up and ordered a beef taco plate and a beer before wandering over to a seat, settling down and, for once, leaving Kyo to pay their tab.

The singer chuckled softly before ordering his own plate of taco rice along with water. He paid their tab, gathered up a couple of sauce packets and his plate before joining Die at the small table he was seated at. "This smells amazing. I'm not sure it actually is or if I'm just that hungry."

"Both." Die smiled at him and then began to devour his meal. Everything tasted absolutely amazing, as it always did.

Kyo grinned, pouring sauce over his rice then digging in. It didn't take him long to get swept up in eating, his attention focused solely on the task.

Die finished before Kyo and carefully placed his napkin down before he reached over and grasped Kyo's hand, breathing out, "Marry me on December first of this year."

Kyo had just taken his last bite when Die grabbed his hand and proposed, again, this time with a date. He very nearly choked, and it took him several moments to actually swallow his food before staring up at Die in shock. 

"Are you...I mean of course...but...why then?" he questioned, his mouth widening to a grin.

Die beamed at him, flushing a little when he realized a few people were looking at them, one older lady looking thrilled as she watched them. "Because without a date, we haven't been serious about planning it. With a date, we have a set time, and we'll move forward."

Kyo glanced around then brought Die's hand up to his lips, kissing his ring. "You're right about that...." He ducked his head, unable to stop smiling, his cheeks tinged pink. "December first it is." Even as he said it, his heart hammered in his chest. "We have a date....we're getting married," he murmured.

Biting lightly at his lower lip, Die watched Kyo and then whispered, "Can I kiss you?"

Kyo looked up again, his smile still in place. He nodded his head, pushing his plate out of the way to make room. "Yes, please."

Pushing himself up, Die leaned across the table, gently cupping Kyo's cheek and placing a chaste kiss on his lips. A smattering of applause brought him back to reality and he pulled back, hiding his smile as he settled down on the chair again.

Kyo reached out to push his fingers through Die's hair during the brief kiss, emotions making the corners of his eyes sting. When people started clapping he flushed darkly and ducked his head, grabbing his drink to hide his grin.

Two beers were placed down at the table and the proprietor of the cart clapped Die and Kyo on the back. "Congrats, boys!" With that, he wandered off, leaving them be with their two beers.

Kyo rubbed his forehead, looking incredibly embarrassed but, somehow, he felt more elated than anything. He grabbed the beer and held it up, grinning at his lover. "To December first."

Die clinked glasses with him and grinned. "To us."

Kyo took a drink then settled back, smiling.


	86. Chapter 86

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

The weeks between Die asking Kyo for a specific date for their marriage and the actual day of were hectic at best, ordering things in preparation. Die was a flurry of activity, constantly asking Kyo for approval on things before confirming that was what he wanted to do. He rushed back and forth between stores and placed a few orders for things on the sly, knowing they'd make Kyo happy for their honeymoon, but not wanting him to find out about them until it was time.

Finally, he had everything tallied up and they were down to finalizations. All he had to do was hit order on a myriad of sites. He'd set up his computer and had every tab of his browser filled with the various sites to order things. But, more importantly, he had a folder of all the items they'd decided on, printed out. This was easier to flip through and envision being a cohesive element of their wedding and reception.

He had two versions, spaced out by a huge clear divider. One held the wedding very privately, very traditional and with only a small handful of people with a large reception the following day back in Tokyo. The other was a larger wedding, but not overly so, just their friends and family, a maximum of eighty guests and a reception following for exactly the same number of people. The wedding was still semi-traditional but not held on temple grounds, and there were more Western elements involved. He'd be happy with either, and he had made a point to tell Kyo that multiple times. The decision, at this point, was up to Kyo.

Settling next to his lover, Die plugged his laptop into the charger and turned off the TV that Kyo was nearly ignoring anyway. He put the folder in his lap and quietly offered, "Choose, darling."

Kyo's part in Die's flurry of activity might have seemed minor to outsiders, but in truth, the vocalist was more than happy to let his fiancé make the bulk of the decisions. He was, of course, patient when it came to deciding this or that detail, giving Die his honest opinion on various aspects of their future ceremony. 

It was a day off, and he'd been sitting in front of the TV, half-dozing when Die settled next him and placed a large binder in his lap. Looking up, he offered a smile then started flipping through it, finding their wedding planned out to the last detail. Two different types were set up in the folder, and he studied each one thoroughly. "I'm pulled towards the simpler one but....then again....I know for a fact that if we don't invite certain people, it'll be seen as a snub...."

"Well... we can probably fit like thirty or so people. Basically, tell them not to bring random dates, and it would work. Honestly, this is for us, not them, so it's what makes you happy that matters." He leaned closer, his arm protectively around Kyo's shoulders. "I'm happy either way, and I'm more than pleased that you let me plan it out this much. This is what I always envisioned getting to do if I ever got married, you know... as lame as that might be."

Kyo leaned into Die's touch, soaking up the comfort for a few moments before flipping back to the smaller wedding. "I know, and I think it's incredibly adorable that you imagined your future wedding. I always figured mine would be just signing the register, and that was it." He gave a soft huff then pointed to the book. "I like this one. We can soothe any perceived offense by inviting the right people to the reception instead."

"I'm impressed that Mr. Love Isn't My Thing envisioned one." Die grinned and lightly squeezed Kyo's shoulders to show he was joking with him.

"A lot of people have a small wedding and a larger reception. It's actually sort of normal. I've been invited to several receptions that weren't a part of the wedding in my life, and it's sort of cool, cause it's not rushed." Kyo grunted, reaching over to tweak Die's stomach in retaliation. "Yes, well, you know...it was generally during my mother's rants about grandchildren and such..." 

Die shifted and flipped through the book again, looking at their decorations and smiling. "Yeah, same here...it seems more relaxed."

"So... are you sure you're okay with the colors and everything? We can still change them; I haven't put in the order just yet."

Kyo shook his head. "I don't want to change them. I think everything's gorgeous."

Die beamed at Kyo and then leaned over to get his laptop, dragging it over and carefully closing out the browser with the larger wedding, leaving the one open with the purchases for the smaller one and the reservations for the first of December for the shrine.

He carefully started hitting purchase on site after site, coming down to the end and pausing for a moment. "Two options on the shrine still. One in Kyoto or the one in Hawaii that you had sent me the link for months ago. Either one is available at that point, and we have enough saved again to fly out the important people to Hawaii. The other is closer, and we can invite a few friends to cap out at thirty. I know I put the Kyoto one in the book, but I wanted to make sure which one you wanted first."

Kyo shifted a bit to allowed for Die's laptop, sneaking a quick kiss to his lover's jaw. He watched as the purchases started rolling in, a fluttery feeling in his stomach. When it got to the shrine, he looked between the two for a few moments. "Considering the wave of acceptance happening right now, I think I want it to be Kyoto...it would mean so much more."

Die nodded and closed the Hawaii option and dove in for the Kyoto one, double-checking the date and time before submitting along with their down payment. Hands shaking slightly, he sat back and breathed out, "Oh my god... this is actually happening," pleasure evident in his voice.

Kyo watched, the flutters in his stomach growing stronger as Die selected their date and hit purchase, sending in a sizeable down payment. He swallowed hard as he turned to look at Die, emotion flitting across his face. "Yeah....it...it really is."

Die put the laptop aside and carefully moved himself into Kyo's lap, framing his lover's face with his hands as he leaned in and delicately kissed him on the lips. Backing up a bit, he moved the binder and then gave Kyo his best serious face. "I have a favor to ask you... it's something I've needed for a while now, and I haven't asked. I was waiting on it to feel right... and now it does."

Kyo grinned as Die slipped into his lap. He brushed a few stray hairs from the other's forehead, returning the light kiss. When Die pulled back, he tilted his head in curiosity, one eyebrow raised in question. "Oh? And what's that?"

Die threaded his fingers into Kyo's short hair and looked right into Kyo's eyes as he spoke. "I need you to Dominate me completely again. I've been so swamped lately, and I can feel myself verging on that stress that breaks me down again." His fingers lightly trailed down over Kyo's ears and then over his neck, coming to rest on his shoulders. "I want to feel like I did the first time. To feel so hard I stop feeling anything at all. I want to exist in a simple place that only holds you and me... one that becomes only you when I can even let go of myself for those precious few minutes." His fingers came around to lightly touch Kyo's throat, cupping it in a mock gesture of taking his breath away. "I want to lose complete control."

Kyo peered at his husband-to-be, the change in topic sparking flames within him. He swallowed, feeling Die's fingers against his throat, his eyes darkening. 

Reaching out to grasp Die's hips, thumbs digging hard into his skin, he looked into his eyes. "You know what you're asking....any hard no's for tonight?"

"Don't call me names... but I'd like you to use pet names in a demeaning sort of way. Like don't call me slut or trash, but do say _darling_ ," he said it in such a way that it was clear it was a term to be used for someone under your control, not as sentimental.

Wetting his lips, he closed his eyes and breathed, "Hurt me. Physically hurt me."

The vocalist gave a short nod, his heart already racing. "Get off of me, and go upstairs. Shower if you wish then go to the bedroom. Pick out one and only one toy you'd like used on you. You have 15 minutes."

Die carefully framed Kyo's face with his hands again and gave him one lingering kiss, leaving their foreheads touching for a moment just afterward. "Thank you." With that, he pulled himself off the other's lap and made his way up the stairs.

Once there, he dashed off to the bathroom, stripping down and doing a quick wash of the necessary places, making sure he didn't get his hair anything more than slightly damp on the ends. Drying off, he snatched up his loose black night pants and slid them on, going back to the bedroom and kneeling down to pull out the box of toys from under the bed.

He selected one he hadn't used and had actually bought as a sick joke during their filming of Different Sense to torment the others by leaving around the office. No one had really known it was him, though one of them would now, he supposed.

Placing the deep blue tentacle dildo out on the dresser, he put the lube next to it and put the lid back on the box, pushing it under the bed and carefully situating himself on the floor beside the bed, kneeling there with his hands in his lap and his head bowed.

Kyo waited until Die was gone before getting up and heading into the downstairs bath. He showered himself off quickly but thoroughly, ideas of what to do with his lover running through his head. Once he was done, he dried off and slid only his black jeans back on, foregoing his underwear and shirt. 

He made his was upstairs, passing the bedroom door and instead stepping over to one of their closets used to store various band related items. Opening it, he pulled out the red leather gloves and black cap he'd worn for recent photoshoots. 

After donning these items, he finally went into their bedroom, smirking to himself to find Die in the perfect position. He leaned against the door jamb, surveying his lover's form, his eyes traversing the ever so slightly visible spine and delicate curve of his ass. "Gorgeous," he murmured, his tone low. 

Several minutes passed by before he pushed himself up and stepped over to Die, leather encased fingers brushing over his cheek before delivering a slap. "I don't recall telling you to wear clothing."

The leather stung in an oh-so-sweet sort of way, and Die sucked in a breath that sounded more aroused than pained in response to it. His eyelids fluttered shut, avoiding looking at his lover-turned-Master for the evening, submissive to his very bones for the time being.

"You didn't tell me not to," he breathed in response, his body tensing slightly in preparation for his punishment for the words.

Kyo delivered another slap to Die's reddening cheek, arousal surging through him at the reaction. "Shut up. You do what I say, and _only_ what I say. Got that, darling?"

Licking his lips slowly, Die nodded and breathed out, "Yes." He opened his eyes, but only to look at the ground, studying Kyo's bare feet.

Kyo drew in a soft breath before lacing his fingers in Die's hair, massaging lightly for a few moments before yanking his head back. "Make me hard," he commanded.

Gasping as his head was yanked back, Die stared up at Kyo and then nodded. Leaning forward, he began to nuzzle against Kyo's crotch, his lips and teeth and cheeks grazing over the fabric of his jeans.

Kyo kept his hand in Die's hair, letting out a low groan as he began nuzzling him. His cock was quick to respond to the touch, the scene already having him on edge.

Die only involved his hand when it was time to pull the button gently out of the hole and lower Kyo's zipper. When he did, he was pleased to find him without underwear. Before he even got him out of his pants entirely, he licked the part of his cock that he could see. Groaning, he tugged the pants down far enough to see his dick, finding the spiked piercing and gasping softly before running his tongue over it to see how much it would actually hurt.

Kyo bit his tongue to hold back any sounds that threatened to escape him, keeping an air of indifference for the moment. He gave Die's hair a sharp tug then settled, stroking his fingers through the other's locks, smirking to himself at Die's reaction to the spike running through the head of his dick.

Satisfied he'd not be cut to pieces, but it could be uncomfortable, Die laved his tongue over the head of his cock and then let loose a puff of hot air over the length of it, finding him hard already. Knowing he'd done the job, he sat back again, his hands once more in his lap and his head bowed.

The vocalist watched, satisfied that Die had followed his orders so perfectly. He reached down and cupped Die's chin, pinching hard as he lifted his head back up, smirking down at him as he opened his mouth, letting saliva drip out and onto Die's face. "Get one thing straight. You are my receptacle. Just a hole for me put my cock, and whatever else, into. If you fuck up...," he pinched Die's chin harder, narrowing his eyes. "You'll pay for it with your blood."

Die winced a little as Kyo spit on him, but he took it silently, listening to what Kyo was telling him. He watched him, with his eyes burning, and finally tilted his face up more and opened his mouth obediently.

A smirk spread across Kyo's face as he let loose a bit more spit, directly into Die's mouth. While it wasn't really anything he enjoyed, it was meant to be humiliating to his lover. "Good," he murmured, releasing Die's chin before pulling his jeans down a bit. He brought his hand to his cock, stroking over the length of it a few times. "Get those pants off, and get on the bed."

Die stood immediately and pushed his pants off, revealing his semi-hard length. Turning around, he padded over to the bed and slid onto it, face-first, cradling his head on his arms, his legs spread to offer himself to Kyo if that was what he wanted.

The position Die got into pleased Kyo greatly. He reached out and gave his lover's ass a good swat before kneeling down and pulling their toy box from beneath the bed. He made a point of making a lot of noise as he rifled through it, pulling out various items to use. 

Once he had all that he wanted, he stood again, reaching under Die to stroke his cock, his gloved thumb stroking over the head. "Do you want pleasure, Daisuke?"

Die thought about it for a few moments before he breathed out a quiet, "Yes." He wanted the physical violence of it as well, but first he wanted pleasure. He'd cooperate first and defy later.

Kyo chuckled softly before wrapping his fingers around Die's cock, beginning to jerk off rather quickly. As he did so, he moved his other hand up to trail along Die's crack, teasing over his entrance but never fully touching him there.

Arousal swam through Die's veins at the touch, and he found himself aching to arch into the touch, though he didn't do so just yet. He wanted to be desperate before he pulled the proverbial trigger on his punishment.

Kyo kept up the pace with his hand on Die's cock, occasionally brushing over the head. He moved his other hand, spreading Die's crack slightly as he leaned in and spat directly onto his entrance. He did that a couple of time before slipping his thumb over the area, moving it in circles around Die's asshole. "I forgot to mention....if you want to cum, now is your only chance.........for a while."

Die hid his smirk in the blankets and nuzzled into them, his ass hiking further up in the air as Kyo pushed his thumb against his asshole. He wanted it inside, that much he was absolutely certain of.

Kyo leaned down and bit Die's ass when he moved, sucking the area harshly, leaving a definite mark. He finally pushed his thumb into Die's ass, wriggling it around as he jerked his dick. "You like that? Hmm?"

"Y-yes!" Die whimpered out as he finally bucked back against Kyo's invading thumb. His cock was aching from Kyo's insistent working of it and the thumb in his ass.

Kyo shifted, leaning in to bite Die's other cheek as he pushed his thumb in deeper. He fucked Die with it as he worked on his cock, almost eager for the other spill his load.

Die ached for it, his cock throbbing for what was to come. But at the same time, his brain was eager to defy Kyo somehow. The problem was, he had nothing to actively defy right then. So, he gave it his best shot. "Ah yeah, give it to me! Fuck!" It wasn't much of a hope to rile Kyo up too much with that, but he _was_ at least talking out of turn.

The very instant that Die attempted to order him to do something, he removed his hands from his lover's body. A snarl left him as he slapped Die's ass hard. "You would dare command _Me_?" He let out a haughty laugh, bringing his foot up and kicking Die's hip, pushing him over onto his side. "Oh, darling, you're going to regret that." 

He reached down, picking up a cock ring, an evil smirk on his face. Pushing Die further onto his back, he grasped his cock and locked the black, leather ring in place. Once he was finished, he held up a key, dangling it in Die's face. "You should have just cum quietly..." 

He slid off the bed and set the key inside the nightstand drawer before picking up a length of rope. He grabbed Die's ankle and roughly used it to flip his body over before climbing onto the bed and finishing getting Die into the position he wanted him. When the guitarist was on his stomach, head towards the headboard, Kyo straddled his back and brought one arm and then the other up above his head. He bound them together then to the bed, checking the knots to make sure they were secure. After that, he got off Die and left the room, making sure to slam the door hard as he exited.

Die gasped when Kyo began to manhandle him, his excitement ramping up rather quickly, his cock nearly straining for release as he was tossed around on the bed. Whimpering a little, he let himself be tied up, wondering where this was heading, though it _was_ the direct opposite direction he was thinking it would have gone. Once he was tied up, he shifted a little and then tensed and gasped as the door was slammed. A laugh bubbled up from him an instant later. So Kyo was giving him a taste of his own medicine, then. 

He wiggled around until his cock wasn't actively hurting, though it was still straining, and he closed his eyes, forcing himself to keep his thoughts on the arrangement and not on anything else.

Kyo went downstairs, busying himself with getting a drink and grabbing one for Die. He leaned against the kitchen counter for a few moments, mentally preparing himself for what was about to happen, pushing himself into the right mind set. When he was ready, some 10 minutes later, he headed back upstairs.

Die had eased himself into a near meditative state in those ten minutes, laying there with his eyes closed and his body stretched out how Kyo had left him for the most part. His breathing was calm and collected, and his muscles were relaxed.

When Kyo entered the room again, he had a dark, predatory look on his face. He eyed Die, licking his lips as he surveyed his prone form. "You're awfully calm for someone who was begging me just mere minutes ago." 

He stepped over to the bed, running a nail down Die's back, pausing before digging his nails into his ass, scraping the flesh there. "It pisses me off."

Die let out a little rumble of a sound and then shivered a little, pursing his lips when Kyo's nails bit into his ass cheek. He didn't respond on the comments, seeing no purpose in it, and nothing he could say to make it worse or better.

Kyo stood there for a moment longer before he began raining blows onto Die's ass, one after the other, alternating between cheeks. He didn't go softly and after just a minute, his hand was nearly numb from the impact.

Die cried out as Kyo spanked him hard enough that he could feel the pain radiating through his body from the impacts. He rubbed his face against his bound arm.

After about 30 licks or so, Kyo stopped, rubbing his hand over Die's reddened skin. He teased along his cock, dropping down to cup and squeeze his balls. "Put your ass in the air."

Die managed to squirm around and do as Kyo told him to, leaning heavily on his forearms in the process, his head bowed as he panted from the energy of the blows he'd taken.

Kyo hummed, watching as Die struggled to get into position. "I want to fuck you, but I'm not so sure you deserve my cock yet....so I'm going to fuck your tight ass with your dirty little secret tentacle." He chuckled and picked up the blue tentacle, examining it and making a mental note to use it himself at a later date. 

He grabbed the lube and positioned himself behind Die. Grabbing his hips, he yanked his ass up some before leaning in and running his tongue along his crack. Letting out a pleased sound, he did it again and again, teasing Die before finally focusing on his entrance, swirling his tongue around and around.

Die whimpered faintly as he pushed his ass upward just a bit more, more shifting because he couldn't help it than because he was trying to gain more pleasure. But he was nearly sure Kyo was going to find it to be for the opposite reason than it was.

Kyo was quick to slap Die's ass, pulling away for a moment. "Greedy." He dove back in to eating Die's asshole, making sloppy noises.

Another whine escaped Die at the smack, though he just buried his head against his arm to hold in any further noises.

Kyo smirked against his lover's asshole, finally leaning back to start pushing his tongue into him. He wriggled it against the tight ring of muscle, loving the way Die slowly loosened up for him.

Die's breathing evened out as he forced himself into a sort of calm. His body began to do its best to relax, and he slowly loosened up.

Kyo fucked Die with his tongue for a bit longer before finally pulling back. "Roll over," he commanded softly, picking up the toy again and squirting lube over the tip of it.

Die pulled at the way he was roped up and then softly murmured, "I uh... can't really without hurting my wrists."

Kyo looked at Die's ropes and mentally cursed himself before giving an annoyed huff. "Fine..." He moved to the top of the bed and adjusted the knotting on the rope, giving it much more slack that it had before. "There. Now do as I say."

Die waited patiently and then rolled himself over, easing himself down on the bed on his back and breathing out a quiet sound.

Kyo waited until Die was settled again before moving between his legs, pushing them open. He reached down and gave Die's cock a few strokes before bringing the toy up, rubbing the textured skin of it against the head of Die's cock.

Squirming a little, Die settled as quickly as possible, huffing out a small laugh at the idea of having a tentacle rubbing against his penis.

Kyo's eyes flicked to Die's face at the laugh. He pressed his lips together, pulling the toy away and immediately shifting down to push it into Die's body, doing so none too gently.

Gasping, Die's cheeks flushed as the toy entered him. He'd expected it to feel somehow wrong and uncomfortable. But, instead, the strange texture of it was nice against the ring of muscles at his entrance and the shape of the tentacle itself brushed nicely over his prostate. He turned his face to the side, face burning with shame of how much he liked this toy.

Kyo smirked as he noted Die's reaction, his cock giving a hard throb. "That's right, darling, I'm fucking you with a tentacle...feel it penetrating your ass? How do the suction cups feel, hmm?" He started fully fucking Die with it, watching with interest as it slid into his lover's body.

Die panted harshly, trying not to push his hips up or pull them away. He was desperate to keep this going and not to make Kyo want to stop this amazing feeling.

Kyo fucked Die harshly with the toy before shoving it the full way in, just pushing on the end of it. "Does it feel good, Die?"

Die let out a cry when it shoved in harshly against his prostate, the tapered tip jabbing at it. He bit down on his tongue to stop the cries and squeezed his eyes shut.

Kyo waited for an answer and upon not receiving one, he shifted the toy upward, pressing against Die's prostate. "Answer me."

"Y-yes!" Die cried out, whimpering just after.

Kyo smirked and eased up on the toy, going back to lightly fucking his lover, making sure to hit his sweet spot. As he did, he moved one hand up to tweak and tug on Die's nipples, doing each one in turn. "Your cock is so hard...I bet you wish you could cum right now..."

Counting his blessings, Die breathed out, "I'm actually enjoying the delay." Perhaps the wrong words... or maybe they were the right ones. He'd find out.

Kyo paused for a moment, peering at Die's face before letting out a laugh. "That's a good thing..." He pushed the dildo back into Die the full way then shifted up on the bed, coming to straddle his chest. "Suck my dick."

Die obediently opened his mouth and waited on Kyo's dick to enter his mouth. Kyo pushed his hips forward, sliding his cock into Die's waiting mouth, groaning softly.

Die took his cock eagerly and swallowed around him once he had him in his mouth. Closing his eyes, he groaned softly and began to move his head the limited amount he could manage in this position.

Kyo shifted up more, helping with the positioning as he started lightly fucking Die's mouth, his hand holding onto the headboard. "Ah yeah, suck my dick...just like that."

Die moaned around his lover's cock, letting himself get off on the pleasure of what was happening for the time being.

Kyo groaned, picking up the pace some as he fucked into Die's mouth. "Fuck, think I'm gonna cum down your throat. You want that?" he moaned out.

Die let out another sound that was vaguely a yes, sucking harshly around Kyo's dick as he thrust into his mouth.

Kyo grinned, pulling back for a moment. He stared down at Die as he reached to remove the piercing, tossing it aside then going back to fucking Die's mouth. "Fuck, so good."

Closing his eyes, Die swallowed hard around Kyo and then worked his throat and tongue in an encouraging fashion, urging him to cum for him.

The vocalist got a fistful of Die's hair, pulling harshly as he fucked his mouth. "Choke on my dick," he groaned out, forcing his cock down Die's throat roughly.

Die didn't manage to gag on it. Not for lack of trying, but his body had grown accustomed to Kyo's dick and choking on him was the furthest thing from what it wanted to do right then. He could have faked it, but Kyo would have known... and that would have rendered it pointless.

Kyo fucked into Die's mouth, expecting his lover to gag around him. A growl sounded when it didn't happen, his hand yanking Die's hair hard. Shifting back, he repositioned himself before shove his cock down the other's throat once more, forcing his nose into his pubic hair.

Die still took it like a champ, his eyes watering a little bit, but not gagging at all, the invading cock just feeling somehow right against the soft tissue of his throat.

Personally, Kyo was impressed by Die's skill but he was still pissed that he wasn't choking his lover in the least. Finally, he pulled back again, shoving Die's head down against the pillow. "Fucking worthless...," he spat out, his hand coming across Die's cheek. "Can't even suck my dick right..."

Die groaned when Kyo's palm struck his cheek, the sting feeling good, and his cock straining from the impact of it. There was something in him that clearly wanted more of what Kyo was giving in that sort of respect, and before he could even stop it, he spat out, "Bite me."

Kyo's eyes narrowed at Die's words, a spark of anger going through him. He reached out and slapped Die again before leaning his head and doing just what the other said, biting the skin just below his left nipple. When he pulled his head up, there was blood leaking from the area.

Die cried out in slight alarm when Kyo actually bit him. His eyes widened, and his breath came in sharp pants. For the moment, he was cowed into his position from something he hadn't expected.

Kyo smirked at Die's reaction, his cock throbbing harshly between his legs. Without speaking, he reached up and undid the knot that tied Die to the bed. Once that was done, he pushed himself to standing, staring down at Die as he stroked a hand over his dick. "I'm still so hard....how do you think I should fix that? Hmm?"

"Use me," Die whispered, his voice trembling and achingly quiet in comparison to his usual strong self.

Kyo stared down at Die before letting out a snort. "Use you? _Darling_ , I fucking own you. And I will use you anyway I see fit. Got it?" He reached out with his foot, lightly kicking Die's ribs. "Roll the fuck over."

Die shivered a little and then rolled over, spreading his legs and arching his ass up into the air for him.

Kyo moved behind Die, going to his knees and grabbing the other's hips, hitching them up just right. He removed the tentacle toy, tossing it aside before quickly replacing it with his cock, thrusting into Die's body without warning. A moan left him as he immediately began fucking the other with harsh thrusts.

Die cried out and shoved his face into the pillow, moaning loudly as Kyo started to fuck him so harshly. "Oh... god," Die whispered against the fabric.

Kyo hunched over Die, focusing on just fucking his ass for the moment, his fingers digging into the other's hips. "Yeah, fucking own your ass..."

"You do, fuck... you do!" Die clenched down around him and shoved his face harder into the pillow, cutting off some of his own air supply intentionally.

Die's words spurred Kyo on and he sped up his thrusts, panting harshly. His hand came down to slap Die's ass a few times, turning the already abused skin redder. "Fuck....gonna cum...right up your ass. Fill you up." He groaned and reached up, grabbing Die's shoulder, pulling him back as he slammed into him.

Die shoved his face harder into the pillow, feeling himself starting to get a little flustered by the cut back oxygen levels, his cock hardening even more at the prospect of what was to come if he defied anything else. He formulated his plan carefully, intent to get ready to implement it, nerves already skittering in his foggy mind.

Kyo shifted slightly, moving his hand to press against the back of Die's head as he pounded into his ass. Mere moments later, he let out a cry as he began to cum, filling Die's passage up with his offering. 

He stilled then, feeling his cock pulsing within Die, a moan sliding past his lips. "Fuck, such a good cum dumpster," he murmured, finally releasing the back of Die's head as he eased out of him.

The moment Kyo was out of him, Die scrambled away from him, nearly pitching face-first off the bed, catching himself at just the last second. Gasping, he stood there, staring at Kyo, his breathing quick as he waited to see what the other would do.

When Die scrambled off of the bed, Kyo jerked his head around, concern flitting over his face until he realized the guitarist was just trying to push his buttons. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Whatever I fuckin' please," Die spat out in return.

Kyo's eyebrows shot up, a spike of anger going through him. "Excuse me?" He pushed him off of the bed, stepping over in front of Die, his look cold. "Get your ass back on that bed. Now."

"Don't feel like it," the guitarist returned, his chin lifting slightly in defiance.

Kyo stared at Die for a moment before reaching up and backhanding him. "Get. On. The. FUCKING Bed."

Die intentionally stood his ground instead of moving with the backhand, the bite of his lover's ring on his face breaking a moan from his lips. His heart beat faster and his eyes stung from the force of the impact. Whimpering a little, he murmured, "No."

Kyo was getting frustrated with his non-compliant lover. He knew the other was doing it on purpose to rile him up, and that in and of itself pushed his buttons.

Growling, he reached out and grabbed Die's upper arm, yanking him down hard, attempting to pull him to the floor. "Looks like you need to be taught a fucking lesson about respect."

Die let himself fall this time, grunting and then staring up at him as he worked spit up in his mouth as discretely as possible. Then he spit it toward Kyo, hissing out, "Fuck you."

Kyo stared as the spit landed on his leg, his eyes narrowing. Without another thought, he lashed out and kicked Die in the side, pushing him over. "You're going to regret that." He kicked Die again in the stomach, though the action was restrained, his brain still holding him back. "Get up."

Instantly, Die plucked himself out of the floor and launched himself at Kyo with his full weight, aiming to knock him back against the bed. "Make me," he hissed.

Kyo gasped and stumbled back, hitting the edge of the bed. Something inside him snapped at that moment and he reached out, shoving Die off of him hard before getting him by the throat, pinning him down. He raised his fist and landed a blow to Die's side. "Fucker."

Instantly, Die's cuffed hands were in Kyo's short hair, though it was hard to tell if he was pulling Kyo closer to be tugging his hair that harshly or if he wanted him closer after being hit in such a way. His cock told the truth of the story, aching between them as the rolled around, Die lashing out at Kyo however he could.

Kyo hissed at the hair pulling, rolling and ending up under Die. He used the position as an opportunity to bite into the other's shoulder, his hand busy trying to free his hair.

Die growled at being bitten again, letting go of his hair to shove him away, scrabbling over the top of him, trying to seem like he was getting away, despite not wanting to at all.

Kyo was quick to grab Die's arm, yanking him back down and straddling him, his thighs pressing in hard on his sides. Reaching back, he grabbed Die's cock, holding it in a death grip. "I wouldn't move if I were you."

Die's breathing grew faster, his chest heaving with the effort of it as he stared up at Kyo, eyes wide and his cock straining in Kyo's grip.

Kyo smirked as he leaned down, kissing Die hard on the mouth before biting his lip hard enough to draw blood, his hand still griping his cock. When he raised up, there was blood on his lips. He licked it off and pushed himself up, going to dresser. After rummaging around for a few moments, he came back with a small leather flogger in his hand. "Get up, bend over the bed. Fail to comply, and you won't cum tonight."

Shakily, Die stood up, flopping himself over on the bed, his face shoved into the comforter where he breathed a sigh of relief, his muscles finally starting to relax in a way they hadn't in months.

Kyo licked his lips, moving over to Die and positioning his arms so that they were straight above his head. He reached under and removed the cock ring, tossing it aside before finally stepping back. 

He took the flogger, trailing its ends over Die's back and sides, examining the forming bruises of his earlier abuse. "All you had to do was behave, darling...," he murmured out, bringing the flogger down over Die's ass with a light swat.

Die breathed out a contented sound when the flogger hit him. He closed his eyes and just relaxed there, waiting on the constant rain he could lose himself in, the endless array of sensation where he wouldn't have time to think anymore.

After testing the waters with light swats over Die's ass and back, Kyo began using actual force. He brought the flogger down in increasingly harder blows, moving up and down over Die's back, ass and legs, groaning softly to himself as he watched the red lines begin to appear on Die's skin.

Die panted as the blows became harder and harder, shivering and then, at last, melting into it. His cares started to fall away and bliss began to take its place.

Kyo could see his lover relax into the bed. He smiled and increased the intensity, raining the blows down as hard as he dared, every once in a while letting the flogger tips graze Die's sides.

Eventually, Die's breath started to hitch each time he was struck with another blow. His cock was so hard he would have cum if he were even remotely inside his own head for the moment. But, as it was, he was simply existing on the most base of levels.

When Kyo finally realized he was fully hard again and Die's back was bleeding in a couple of spots, he tossed the flogger aside. Climbing onto the bed behind Die, he positioned himself then slowly eased into his lover's body, shuddering faintly. He didn't move at first, instead bending down and kissing a few of the welts, his hand brushing over Die's skin and up through his hair. "You're gorgeous," he murmured, the scene breaking and the need to pamper his lover becoming a necessity.

Die came back to himself as Kyo slid into his body and by the time he was holding him close, Die realized there were tears sliding down his cheeks. But it wasn't the upset type, rather it was just the kind that made him feel safe to be himself in Kyo's arms.

Kyo gently moved against Die, shifting himself to nuzzle against the back of the other's neck. After a few minutes, he slipped his hand around to grasp Die's length, stroking him in gently movements.

It only took a few seconds of Kyo's hand around him before Die was cumming, his cock straining for a moment and then twitching as he lost himself all over the bed sheets, issuing a quiet sigh.

Kyo smiled against Die's neck, continuing to stroking him for a few moments as he moved inside of him. "That's it, my gorgeous lover."

It didn't take long for the stupor to start wearing off and the pain to start sliding in, leaving Die gripping the bedsheets harshly as he pushed back against Kyo, trying to encourage him to cum faster for him.

Kyo shifted slightly, moving faster as Die pushed against him. It wasn't much longer before he let out a soft groan and came, stilling again. 

He stayed still for a few moments before easing out of his lover's body and moving to sit beside him. "Talk to me, darling."

Die turned his head to look at Kyo, looking a bit fuzzy around the edges. "Shower... really want a shower. Cool water on my back." He reached up and gently touched his lover's face.

Kyo stroked his hand over Die's cheek, nodding. He grasped Die's wrists, undoing the ropes before pushing himself up off of the bed. Holding out a hand for his lover, he smiled. "Think you can walk? I have some cream to put on your back when we're done..."

Die eased himself off the bed and then took Kyo's hand, letting him lead the way for the time being.

Kyo slowly lead the way to the bathroom, going to turn the shower onto a lukewarm setting before heading to the toilet and taking a piss. Once he was finished, he stepped into the shower to test it, gesturing to Die. "It should be fine...we can turn it cooler if you want."

Stepping in, Die eased himself down to sit on the floor of the shower, his back to the sprayer and his head bowed as the water sluiced over him.

Kyo watched his lover, biting his lip as he knelt down in front of him. He was unable to stop touching him, his hands sliding over his arms and chest. "Are you okay?" he questioned, concern evident in his voice.

Die reached to touch Kyo's hand, holding onto it once he got ahold of it. "I'm perfect... it's everything I asked for." He offered the other a tired smile.

Kyo smiled softly, squeezing Die's hand. "Good..." He leaned down, pressing a kiss to the top of Die's head. "I love you, Koi."

"I love you, too..." Die closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Kyo's chest.

Kyo let Die stay like that for a while before gently moving away and standing up. He switched the shower to the handheld sprayer and got the shampoo, sudsing up Die's hair, massaging his scalp as he did. He rinsed it out then used conditioner, letting that sit for now. "You wanna stand up so I can wash the rest of you?"

Die sat there while Kyo cleaned him up, finally snapping to when Kyo spoke. He shifted to his feet.

Kyo waited patiently for Die to stand then quickly took care of the rest of him. He gently shuffled Die out of the way and sped through getting himself cleaned up before turning off the water. He stepped out and grabbed a towel, drying himself first then getting another for Die. "C'mon, let's dry your front...your back can air dry."

Nodding a little bit and then pursing his lips a little as he stepped closer and let Kyo start to dry him off.

Kyo smiled and carefully, thoroughly patted Die dry with the towel. When he was finished with everything but his backside, he ruffled the towel in Die's hair a bit then tossed it aside. Taking Die's hand, he led him out and into the bedroom, nodding to the bed. "Get comfy however you want..."

Once they were in the room, Die considered it for a moment and then laid himself face down on the bed, pushing his face into the pillow and closing his eyes.

Kyo waited for Die to get comfortable before examining the damage done to his lover's back. There were a few really red, angry looking welts and bruises from their tussle on the floor but other than that, it wasn't too bad. 

Retrieving the ointment from the bedside table, Kyo sat down beside Die and very gently began spreading it over his back. "Beautiful," he murmured.

Die winced a little as the ointment was spread over his back, but he didn't complain or even say anything about it. Instead, he just bit lightly at his lip and allowed himself to feel whatever he wanted to.

Kyo took his time making sure all of Die's welts were covered then put the ointment up and wiped his hands off. After that, he stretched out beside his lover, reaching out to brush his fingers through his hair. "You okay?"

Die held out his hand toward Kyo. "Just hold my hand for a while, yeah?"

Kyo reached down and linked his fingers with Die's, shifting as close as he possibly could before closing his eyes.

Yawning a little, Die settled in and then allowed himself to start to relax again. "Thank you..."

Kyo leaned over and pressed a kiss to Die's shoulder. "You're welcome, darling...was it what you wanted?"

Die breathed out a quiet laugh. "Next time, if we're not close to a concert... punch me in the face."

Kyo blinked then let out a snort. "If you wish...." He wasn't entirely sure he could do such a thing out of nowhere, but if he worked up to it and Die truly wanted it, he would do his best.

Smirking a little, Die murmured, "Now sleep," his voice partly muffled by the pillow.

Kyo hummed, shifting around a bit before closing his eyes again, a soft smile on his face.


	87. Chapter 87

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

For what felt like the hundredth time in the past few days, Die found himself actively glaring at Kuroo. The older man was watching him, looking honestly a bit cowed, regret written clear as day over his face. 

Sure, Kuroo hadn't done something the way Die had asked - the fact that he'd asked for it to be done in a way that was all but impossible discounted - but that was no reason at all for the vehement way that he'd responded. Drawing himself up and straightening his shoulders, Die looked Kuroo square in the eyes and breathed out, "Fuck, man... I'm so sorry." Pinching the bridge of his nose, he sighed and then waved his hand. "I owe you one... I'm sorry. No excuses, I fucked up."

And right there, right then, he made a decision. Three weeks of no Kyo, no dick action but his own, and not even an ounce of cuddling up with his lover had left him bitter and angry. So angry that his personality appeared to be being overwritten by that of a very irritated old man... with perhaps a slight bit of spoiled teenage brat thrown in for good measure.

Turning around, he offered, "I'll fix it... my attitude I mean... and uh... thanks for making that not have to be my equipment, too." With that, he darted off down the hallway, cursing lowly under his breath. No ifs, no ands, no buts, and definitely no holding back no matter how public of a display this became. Because, fuck it, he was done. Very, very done with the hiding their relationship from the European staff and from the damn fans. It was wearing on him, and he was sure it was wearing on Kyo to not even be able to hold hands or sit close to one another. Much less all the rest of the things that weren't being had.

He turned another corner and came out into the lobby area, finding Kyo lingering near the doors, just out of view of the fans on the other side. He walked swiftly across the lobby, feet fast on the floor, boots heavy in their sound as he approached. No words, no greeting, just a line straight toward the man he loved very most in the entire world.

Kyo stood near the doors, peering out at the crowd of fans hovering just a couple of feet from him. He pushed his hand through his hair and gave a sigh, trying to gear himself up to step out through that crowd to get to the bus. 

The sound of boots thudding on the wood floor caught his attention, and he turned, finding Die making a beeline towards him. He raised his eyebrows in question, turning and stepping away from the door, ready to ask Die what was up.

Die passed by the glass and reached just the other side of it, narrowly out of view of anyone even trying to peer in through the doors. He grasped Kyo's shoulders and thudded him back against the wall. An instant later, his mouth was fitted over Kyo's own, hungry and insistent. His hands moved, one up into his lover's short hair and the other down to his bicep, holding it harshly. The kiss was all tongue and teeth, saliva and desperation - born of nothing more than the hunger he held for the other's touch and taste. His body pushed flush against Kyo's own, the start of his own arousal already blossoming in his belly, though it hadn't quite sent the message to his cock just yet.

Kyo blinked as Die pushed him against the wall, confusion flashing across his face. He parted his lips to question Die but didn't get a word out as the other quickly began kissing him. The hunger in the action had his breath hitching, his hands moving up to grasp Die's arms. Heat flared within him, the contact and danger of the situation igniting a fire in his abdomen, forcing the quietest of moans out against Die's lips.

Die finally broke the kiss, his lips grazing over Kyo's cheek and jaw, never fully leaving as he was already rocking his hips against Kyo's own, one hand creeping down to hitch up Kyo's leg. Once his lips found Kyo's ear, he nearly groaned out the words he had to say. "I need you more than I can tell you with words. It's deeper than lust, more than hunger... I'm done hiding, Kyo. I'm finished. I don't care who knows anymore."

Kyo shifted against Die, his head dropping back slightly as their bodies pressed together, his leg up on Die's thigh. The position left no room for excuses. If anyone saw them, it would be very obvious what was happening. A soft whimper left Kyo's lips as he brought his hand up to push into Die's hair, his breathing shallow. "Daisuke...." 

He didn't know how to respond, the words not coming to him. Instead he leaned in and found Die's lips with his own, kissing him deeply then pulling away, glancing towards the windows. "It....can't be undone....once they know...it's out there."

Die's hand dragged down Kyo's thigh and then back to his hip, holding on as he swiped his tongue over Kyo's lips. "I know..." he pressed his lips hard against Kyo's own again and then grazed his teeth along his lover's jawline. "I've been ready for this for a long time."

Kyo groaned lowly at Die's actions, arousal thrumming through him despite the heaviness of Die's confession just moments ago. Turning his head to bury his face against Die's neck, he licked then nipped the skin there. When he pulled back, he looked up at his lover and nodded. "Okay."

The comment gave Die pause, and he couldn't help that he actually stared at Kyo in relative shock for a moment. He'd been trying to hint at it for nearly a year that he was beyond ready for the world to know... for them to stop hiding. And now, he'd spilled it all, relatively on accident, in the midst of mind-blowing _desperate_ need, and Kyo had responded with a positive. He huffed out a soft breath and pulled himself back before he completely lost the gumption of the moment, the utter boldness that was more inherent to Kyo than to himself. 

Squaring his shoulders, he wiped kiss-swollen lips and pulled Kyo to his side. "Bus... we're going to the bus, then." Slinging his arm around his shoulders, he waited to see if Kyo would respond favorably to this before he forced this trek on him.

Kyo looked up at Die's face, registering the shock there then offering the smallest of smiles. When he was pulled to Die's side, he took a deep breath before nodding again. 

"To the bus...," he murmured, his arm going around Die's waist, his heart beginning to thud in his ears. It was finally happening and not in the slightest bit like he'd thought it would. Instead of a carefully orchestrated announcement, it was a spur of the moment act borne of desperation. Fitting, he thought, given how their relationship began to start with.

Die took in a deep breath and the released it, smiling at Kyo. "No matter what the reaction is, it'll never change a thing about how I feel about you. I love you deeply, and that won't change." Stepping out into the lobby area, he tilted Kyo's head up with two fingers beneath his chin and kissed him solidly on the lips for a moment, uncaring if anyone saw or not. This wasn't a part of the show, but it was something he'd always wanted not to have to hide. and if they were going, he was going all in.

Kyo smiled softly then kissed Die back, putting his all into it instead of preparing to break away at the first sound of someone coming. 

Pushing the door open, Die herded Kyo out and then stepped back to his side, sliding his arm lovingly around Kyo's shoulders again and starting for the bus, a genuine smile on his face and an easy lilt to his stride as they advanced through the crowd toward the bus.

Suddenly, Kyo was being lead outside, Die's arm around him as fans started crying out their names. He held on tight to Die, keeping his head up but refusing to look around. He heard a few gasps, some whispers and just outright yells as they moved past the fans. He wasn't sure if they were negative, positive or just plain shocked, but he ignored them, focusing on the safety of the bus looming ahead.

Die waved to a few people who were beaming at them and waving, just waiting on someone to say something he didn't want to hear. But it didn't come, the fandom at least having the grace to keep any negativity to themselves for the time being. He opened the bus door and then stepped back to let Kyo go ahead of him, being his over-protective, doting self in this instance in order to not let Kyo get left as the last one outside. Stepping up into the bus, he turned back and blew the fans a kiss before slamming the door and turning to beam at Kyo.

Kyo stepped onto the bus, casting a quick glance over the crowd then moving out of sight. When Die finally shut the door, he sagged against the wall, breathing out a sigh of relief. "Wow..."

Die took the few steps up and then pulled Kyo against him, his embrace tender and loving for the moment. "We did it. There it is. And not one negative comment to be heard." He gave his lover a soft smile, looking like a huge burden had been lifted off of his shoulders for the first time in years. "No more hiding. No more avoiding the relationship or type of lover questions... I don't even care how much they ask me. I just... I wanted the world to know I'm going to offer myself to you for the rest of our lives."

Kyo slipped his arms around Die's waist, holding on tight for a moment then looking up at the other, smiling softly. "Yeah, I was surprised...but they seemed actually happy? Or at least accepting." 

He licked his lips, his hand pushing into his short hair, emotion shining in his eyes. "They're going to ask a lot over the next few months..."

"Let them ask... answer what you want, and tell them your private life is private on anything you don't want to." Die pecked Kyo on the nose and then breathed out a huff of a laugh. "Okay, so... um... I didn't honestly intend to confess that. I'm just a jumble of a mess, and I've been missing you and stressed out how often I can't even hold your hand... and horny. Very, very horny. It just got the better of me." 

Kyo nodded, grinning a bit. "Will do...and yeah, it's been hell on my end, too. Three straight weeks of nothing. We might as well have been on opposite continents." He shifted away from Die, bending down to get out of his boots, having had enough of them for the night. 

Die gave Kyo a lopsided grin. "I honestly was planning on fucking you into the wall."

That comment from his lover's mouth had him snapping his head up, the flames from before flaring again within an instant. "I thought for sure you were going to..."

All it took was the fire in Kyo's eyes to set Die off again. Nothing was going to get in his way this time. He grasped Kyo, in all his sweaty, post-show glory and hauled him over to the table. One lonely boot lay behind their trail and Die didn't hesitate at all as he reached around to unfasten Kyo's belt buckle, bending him over the table with the use of his body to maneuver him. "I'm gonna fuck you good and hard, baby. Flat out until I nut in your ass."

Kyo gasped as Die manhandled him, the action going straight to his dick. He grunted when he hit the table, his ass pushing up into the air for Die. "Do it; fuck me until I scream loud enough for them to hear."

"You tempter, you." Die yanked Kyo's pants down once he had them open and knelt behind him, not even hesitating in shoving his face against Kyo's ass and diligently starting to eat him out as he unfastened his own pants.

Kyo huffed out a laugh then reached out to hold onto the table as Die pulled his pants down. He was expecting for his lover to start prepping him but not with his tongue. Kyo let out a moan, his hips pushing back against Die's face, unable to help. "Fuck Die!"

Die gave it a good minute or so before he pushed himself to his feet, wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and then positioned himself behind Kyo. He'd left a good amount of saliva behind and wasn't the least bit worried about Kyo taking him like a champ. 

Kyo made plenty of noise as Die ate his ass, his cock hardening fully from the action. When Die pulled away, he gave a whine, his ass pushing back against the air for a moment. "Die...Gods..." 

Die nudged the head of his cock against his asshole and then penetrated him with one smooth thrust and a groan. Instantly, he felt the relief that being with someone yielded to him, and even as he grasped Kyo's hips and began to fuck him - hard and fast - he already felt better than he had in weeks.

As soon as Kyo felt the tip of Die's cock against his hole, he shuddered before relaxing himself just in time for Die to push into him, filling him up. A cry ripped from his throat, and he hunched over the table, clinging to it as Die began fucking him. "DIE! FUCK ME!"

Arousal ripped through Die at the fact that Kyo wasn't being at all quiet about this. He laid into him harder, encouraging - if anything - the words that had come from his lover's mouth and, more importantly, the volume at which they'd left it. His nails bit into Kyo's hips, little crescent shapes forming as he clutched at him harder than he, perhaps, meant to. Every ounce of frustration and desire thrummed through him as he pumped quick and hard into Kyo's body, eager to find his satisfaction at the end of an orgasm.

The vocalist clawed at the table, his hips jerking back to meet Die's thrusts, wanting to feel his cock deeper within him. His own length was rigid between his legs, pre-cum dripping from the tip. The pleasure was so intense he couldn't stop the moans from spilling from his lips. "D-die!"

Nothing in the world could have stopped Die right then, and that fact was proven when a moment later, the bus door opened and Nora stepped inside. Die tugged his shirt down to the side to help keep her from seeing far too much, but other than that, he didn't even let up. Leaning over Kyo, he fucked him harder, panting out a quiet, "I'm not even sorry."

Nora, for her part, just looked shocked and then turned her back on them, standing there awkwardly. Opening the door again was out of the question, and trying to get past them in the narrow aisle was equally so.

Kyo gasped when the door opened though he wasn't sure if it was shock or the fact that Die's dick had just hit his prostate. He spared one glance towards Nora then buried his face against his arm. He couldn't bring himself to stop Die so he just bit his lip, whimpering instead of moaning aloud.

Die drove his cock into Kyo's asshole even deeper, slamming his body against Kyo's with every forward thrust, his breath panting out in half moans every single time. Finally, blessedly, he started to cum, the intense feeling of pleasure followed quickly by relief as he lost it deep inside of Kyo's ass. He jerked his hips a few more times, breathing out pleased sighs and moans, unable to stop himself from making all the sounds he desired to. 

Kyo managed to stay quiet for a few moments but the pleasure became too great for him, and he was soon moaning loudly once more. His back arched as he pushed hard against Die, shuddering with each thrust. When his lover finally came, he groaned again, his cock straining hard in that instant. "Die..." 

Finally, Die pulled out and knelt down, pulling Kyo's dick back between his legs and eagerly sucking the tip of it as he jacked him off, intent to give his lover the bliss he'd just found.

A whine left Kyo as Die slid from his body, the fear that his lover would stop now to fix the situation with Nora welling up inside him. His rational mind knew they should have stopped and continued later, but the lustful beast within demanded he find his satisfaction as well. He wasn't disappointed in that aspect either as Die started sucking and jacking him off. He slumped against the table and let him, pushing his lover's cum from his body. "Oh gods..."

Die did his level best to provide Kyo with everything he needed to cum right then. He moaned around his dick, going at him like he'd never tasted cock in his entire life, and it was the greatest tasting thing he'd ever had.

It was just a few moments of Die bathing his cock with attention and his tongue before Kyo reached his peak. He tensed up then cried out a little too loudly as he began to cum down Die's throat. "DAISUKE!"

Die moaned as he took it all, drinking it down without a single ounce of hesitation. He sucked him clean and then stood up, hitching Kyo's pants up and letting him get ahold of them before he wiped his hand over his mouth and cleared his throat.   
Kyo shuddered as Die swallowed his offering. He took a second to gain his senses before grabbing his pants and slumping against the table once more.

Die’s fingers worked quickly to tuck himself back in and fasten up his own jeans. "So, ah... yeah."

Nora chanced a glance at them, immediately going to skirt past Die. "Good show. Think we could keep that sort of thing to the dressing room next time maybe?"

His cheeks flushed as Nora spoke up, guilt lancing through him. "Sorry, Nora....we, ah, it's been a while..."

"I'm aware." Nora grabbed what she needed and then came back toward the front of the bus. "No shame in it, just... didn't really want to see it." She glanced between the two of them. "Did you two... do something... where the fans could see it, by the way? I got some strange questions I wasn't really prepared for on my way in here."

Kyo was not exactly in a state to explain things to Nora so he waved his hand towards Die before moving to sit down.

Die pulled himself up on the table Kyo had just vacated and crossed his arms lightly over his chest. "Yeah, we sort of just... dumped it on the world. Arms around one another, and a possible kiss that someone might have seen. Not to mention being loud about us fucking just now."

Nora arched an eyebrow and then nodded. "Okay. So, intentional then. Shall I... give them the truth if they ask then? I told them I was in a hurry, and I'd be right back. So it'd probably be nice to answer them when I come back out."

Kyo cleared his throat, reaching out to find Die's hand, simply wanting the contact. "It was intentional. We're tired of hiding..."

Die took Kyo's hand. "Just... if it's a question about if we're together, say yes. If it's more than that, tell them to email me. I'll be putting my email up on the Yakan Dai Gaku twitter later tonight, and I'll answer any serious questions as quickly as I can. Though, since I expect an influx, that may take a while."

Kyo glanced up at Die then to Nora. "Thank you for being understanding." He squeezed Die's hand, running his thumb over his lover's knuckles.

Nora clucked her tongue lightly. "Boys, I'm nothing if not understanding of all that happens with you two. And I could not be happier that you're finally ready to stop hiding." She made her way toward the bus door and then paused, glancing back at them. "And no matter the waves, I'm with you." With that, she opened the door and stepped out, closing it behind her to a chorus of, "Nora!"

Kyo stared after Nora as she left the bus then looked down at the table. A lump had formed in his throat, and he swallowed hard, trying to push away the sudden rush of emotion he felt.

Die shifted then, kneeling in front of Kyo and lightly nudging his chin with his fingertips. "No regrets?"

Kyo licked his lips and nodded. "No regrets." He took a deep breath and leaned in, kissing Die softly.

Die leaned up and kissed him back. A few more seconds and Die breathed out, "I'll field most of it, okay? Just... stand by me and back me up on the truth, and we'll be fine."

Kyo brushed his fingers through Die's hair. "Okay. I think I can handle that." He paused for a moment then smiled softly. "I can handle anything with you by my side."

"And you by mine," Die breathed out, just gazing up into his lover's eyes. Nothing in the world had ever been more perfect for him than this moment... knowing they'd never have to hide again, that regardless of reaction, everyone would know he was so head-over-heels in love with Kyo that he was going to spend the rest of his life with him.


	88. Chapter 88

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

The European tour was well underway, the band currently in Finland for the night. Kyo was walking, hand in hand, with Die down a small pedestrian street, heading towards an intimate restaurant one of the guys from Apocolyptica had recommended. As they walked, Kyo couldn't stop glancing down at their entwined fingers, jolts of happiness surging through him each time he did. Here they were, in public, free to be a normal couple. It filled him with so much relief and joy. He smiled softly to himself, his hand tightening around Die's as they crossed a street, passing by a multitude of people, not in the least bit worried about them noticing their closeness.

The days since they'd come out to the general public had been rushed and somewhat frantic for Die, especially fielding all of the questions. But he didn't mind it, knowing that he was free to do whatever he wanted with Kyo now that word was out. Besides, the questions were coming in slower since he was being so candid, and fans were posting most of his words up all over online, spreading the answers for him. There were a few things he refused to answer, but he'd always jokingly reply to the emails anyway, smirking a little that some people were so bold as to ask who topped whom and shit like that. He'd always feed them, telling them that sex was great but nothing more, laughing it off and letting them have their own dirty imaginations about the whole thing.

And now... with Kyo's hand grasping his own, he couldn't have been happier. A huge smile was plastered across his face as they made their way toward a restaurant. It was actually happening... a real date with his lover, right out where the world could see them. His heart swelled just a bit to even be imagining it, and he could only guess at how he'd feel once they were there, seated next to one another rather than across the table - or so he hoped - leaning in toward one another and- he cut of his line of thought, finding his heart was beating quickly and the grin on his lips was a little too obvious.

Kyo found himself lost in thought as they walked, his mind racing over the events of the last few days. He was grateful Die had been handling the sheer flood of questions and comments that their sites had been inundated with. He'd had some fun answering a few that had come to his own site, making sure the answers were incredibly vague or extremely sarcastic. He'd made up for it though by posting teaser photos of him and Die, even though the shots were filtered and edited. 

He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't realize they were already at the restaurant. He just stood there, a slightly dopey grin on his face as he thought of the next photo he'd post. Perhaps he'd do an A Knot Of one of them kissing.

Die gazed at Kyo for a moment while the other was obviously off in his own la-la-land. Finally, he gently placed his hand on Kyo's cheek and rubbed his thumb over the other's skin, smiling at him as he waited on a reaction.

Kyo blinked and focused his eyes on Die's face, blushing just a little once he realized he'd been lost in thought. He reached up and stroked his hand over the other's. "I didn't realize we were here already...sorry."

"You were obviously lost in a very pleasant place... so it's okay." Die let his hand drop after a few more seconds, his entire being radiating how happy he was already. "I've never seen you like this except about work... and now it's about me... about us." It was nothing but absolutely clear that he felt like a million dollars for this one fact.

Kyo smiled, his cheeks still pink. "I was thinking about us and the fact that I'm holding your hand in public, and it's currently the greatest feeling in the world."

"Let's make that feeling enormously better then." Die took a few steps, tugging Kyo gently with him, and then opened the door for him, letting go of his hand to let him walk inside without it being a bit awkward position-wise.

Kyo smiled, stepping through the door once Die had opened it then paused to wait for his lover. A rather tall, blonde hostess came up, looking them over in a way that told him she was at least familiar with who they were. She held up two fingers and, after they nodded in confirmation, led them to a booth in the back, placing two menus on either side of the table. Once she was gone, the vocalist slid into one side of the booth before looking up at Die and patting the bench next to him. "Sit beside me?"

Die followed along after giving the girl a smile, preparing to wait until Kyo decided where he was going to sit. He licked his lips a little, about to sit on the other side just for the sake of where the menus had been placed. But then, Kyo patted the bench and offered him to sit there and Die immediately fluffed up, looking thrilled to the core. He slid in next to him and made sure his whole leg was pressed up against Kyo's before he pulled the menu from across the table and settled back, flipping it open.

Kyo grinned at Die's happy expression. He settled back and picked up the menu as well, looking through it. He stared at it for a while before huffing out a breath. "I have no idea what I want. Something light though."

Die pointed at the top of the menu. "It's not really light, but there's calamari, and we could do the salad with pepperoncini in it if you'd like? It looks really good, and the stuff in it sounds delicious."

Kyo studied the calamari for a moment then flicked his eyes around until he found the salad. He nodded before setting his menu down and leaning his head against Die's arm. "Sounds good to me. Are you going to have beer?"

Die's heart thudded as Kyo leaned his head on his arm, happiness flooding him like the best goddamned high he'd ever had. "I don't think I _need_ one," he breathed out, looking completely enamored as he gazed down at the top of Kyo's head.

Kyo hummed softly before pulling away to look at Die, smiling at the expression on his face. "Are you implying that I'm intoxicating enough for you?"

"Oh, I wasn’t just implying it; that's exactly what I was saying." Die glanced back at the menu, flipping it over and making a small sound before he looked up again.

The vocalist ducked his head to hide the fact that his heart turned to mush at Die's words. Sometimes he couldn't fathom that he was so affected by things like that, but it really made him melt. His hand dropped to Die's leg, squeezing lightly.

Die's chin lifted up a bit, and he smirked slightly as he identified how Kyo was likely feeling. After a few moments, the waitress appeared, her quiet voice filtering in. "Hi, my name is Jane, and I will be your server for the evening. We'd like to welcome you and offer you this complimentary basket of bread." She pushed a basket of buttery garlic rolls in front of them, the smell delectable. 

Die looked up at her, studying her face and then the way her hands shook as she put the basket on the table. "Thank you," he offered.

She nearly beamed at him and then looked at Kyo the same way, like she was head-over-heels, and finally managed. "Do you know what you'd like to drink tonight? We have hand-squeezed lemonade and our wines come from our own vineyard. The blush is very popular."

Kyo lifted his head when he heard the waitress's voice. He glanced at the delicious looking rolls before raising his eyes to her face. He almost laughed at the way she was looking at them, an image of the heart eyed emoji coming to mind. At the mention of wine, he tilted his head, wondering if it would go well with their planned meal. 

"Wine, please," he replied, not really paying attention to the fact that the girl wouldn't know Japanese.

Die nearly laughed at Kyo's comment and how he didn't even seem to realize he'd said it in Japanese. The girl, for her part, looked utterly perplexed as she tried the words in her mind, sifting through some unknown vocabulary list to see if she knew them or not.

Die intervened quickly, murmuring, "He would like the wine. I'd say probably the blush for him. A Sprite for me, and I think we know what we'd like to order as well."

She nodded and pulled out a pad of paper that looked like it'd never seen her pen across it before. Die quickly identified that either she was new or she didn't normally have to write things down to do her job. He let her scribble and once she looked like she was done with the other part, he saved her the words of having to ask him what they'd like and just dove right in. “The calamari and the pepperoncini salad please. We'll be sharing them."

She wrote the rest down as well and then managed a nervous smile at them both. "We'll have your drinks right back out. Is there anything else I can bring before your meal?"

Die glanced at Kyo to see if he had anything to add.

The vocalist blinked when Die repeated his words before realization dawned on him. He sniffed and let his lover go on with the ordering, content to listen to the foreign words drifting into his ears. 

He shook his head when asked if there was anything else, figuring they'd either leave it at that or decide on dessert later.

"We're good, thank you," Die offered to the girl, who nodded and then quickly hurried off to the kitchen area. 

Once she was out of earshot, Die murmured, "She definitely knows who we are... seems like maybe we stumbled upon the one place everyone knows us in this city."

Kyo looked up and nodded. "Yeah, I got that vibe too. Figures..." He gave a little laugh then reached out, picking up one of the rolls. 

He pinched off a bite then smirked a little. "Will you still kiss me after I eat these?"

"I'd kiss you if a dog slobbered on you, so yes." Die grinned at his lover and then settled in a bit closer to him, looking more at ease than he had in a long time with a bunch of fans around him. The look he'd once had, years and years ago – back when he'd been naïve enough to think no one would judge him – came back to his eyes and the gentle curve of his mouth as he sat there. Of course, he knew the world was judging them as they ate in this quite little restaurant. But it was their world, one they chose and shaped and made their own little hole within. And beside Kyo, he could face it all without a single regret.

Kyo chuckled softly, biting into the piece he held, making an unrestrained sound of pleasure at the flavor of it. When he'd finished chewing, he looked over at Die again, pausing and smiling at the look of ease on his lover's face. It was something that brought him joy, to see the tension usually there gone.

A few minutes later, Die snapped out of his little happy trance as the Sprite and wine were delivered to the table. The girl placed a glass down and splashed some of the wine into the glass offering it to Kyo and murmuring a single Japanese word that Die quickly found to be the word for "taste" if one were to be quite literal about it. It wasn't even entirely pronounced right, but he immediately perked up and beamed at her in an attempt to encourage her random foray into another language.

Kyo shifted a bit and reached for the wine, smiling at the girl. He took a quick sip and nodded, finding the flavor of it sweet and light, a hint of berries settling on his tongue. "It's good," he murmured softly, setting the glass back down for her to fill.

Looking relieved, she moved to fill his glass. Once she had done so, she gave them a gentle bow of her head and then dashed back off again.

Die's grin just wouldn't stop, and he actually snickered a little once she was gone. "That was adorable."

Kyo laughed quietly. "It really was." He took another sip of the wine then offered it to Die. "Want to try? I think it has those berries that you liked so much last time we were here."

Die retrieved the glass and took a sip before placing it back in front of Kyo, nodding and giving his hum of approval. "Very good... maybe we should get a bottle to take with us. Save it for the you-know-what."

Kyo nodded. "Sounds good to me." He grabbed up another piece of garlic bread, nibbling it as he let his eyes wander around the restaurant. It was fairly crowded, a cacophony of voices in the air. Still though, he was so far pleased with their choice.

Without even thinking about it, Die dropped his arm around Kyo's shoulders for a moment, leaning over and retrieving a napkin from the dispenser and then leaning back, leaving his arm where it was. The comfort and ease of the action left it as what it simply was - a habit he no longer had to hide.

Kyo shifted closer to Die when the other's arm went around his shoulders. Comfort spread through him and he found himself smiling with ease as he sat there. 

"This is nice."

"It is... just being able to... be." He stretched and then settled back again, his hand lightly rubbing over Kyo's shoulder as he picked up his Sprite and took a few sips.

The vocalist nodded, sipping his wine then settling the glass on the table. "It's so free. I no longer feel suffocated and trapped."

"It is." Die looked up when a man appeared at their table, bearing their food. 

"Calamari and a salad?"

"Yup, definitely."

Kyo sat up a little straighter when their food came, his stomach giving a quiet growl at the smell of the calamari. 

He took one of the plates given to them, placing it in front of himself. "This looks really good."

The guy hung around for a moment to make sure they looked satisfied and the departed the table. Die grabbed a plate as well and dumped out some salad onto it with little ceremony or grace, picking up a fork and digging it rather quickly.

Kyo followed suit, getting as much salad as he wanted then adding a couple pieces of the calamari on top. 

He began eating, focusing on that task for the moment.

Die munched on the salad as quickly as he dared to without choking on it and then drained half the Sprite before he began picking up the calamari and dunking it into the sauce provided, making little happy sounds as he did so.

After making a serious dent in his food, Kyo paused to sip his wine. After that, he began eating again, though this time he pressed his thigh against Die's. 

Partway through the meal, Die glanced over at Kyo and then snickered a little. "You know what I just realized?"

Kyo looked up and raised an eyebrow, his mouth currently occupied by a bite of calamari. "Mm?"

"This is the one seafood I will willingly eat and actually order without complaint. And I honestly have never thought about that until just now."

Kyo blinked a bit and swallowed his bite, laughing just after. "I didn't even consider that when you ordered it...but you're right."

Die picked up another piece and then, smirking, held it up for Kyo to take from him.

Kyo smiled and leaned over, delicately plucking the bite from Die's hand with his teeth, flicking his tongue out to swipe over the tip of Die's fingers as he did. When he'd swallowed it, he grinned and picked up a piece, following Die's example and holding it out.

Die chuckled when Kyo repeated the process for him, reaching out and taking hold of Kyo's wrist before he slid his mouth around both fingers and then slowly slid upward, taking the food with him as he did. Chewing and swallowing, he then leaned over and lightly pecked Kyo on the lips before murmuring, "Okay... that felt damn good." With a smile that lit his entire face, he let go of Kyo's hand and settled back, picking up his drink to take a sip, subtly glancing around to see if anyone had noticed what they'd done.

Kyo found a tendril of heat sliding through him at the way Die took the offered piece of squid. He let out a quiet little sound, his lips curving upwards. "Mm, it did, didn't it?" Chuckling at his own body's quick reaction, he reached for his wine, draining the glass. "This whole...openness thing...it's like a relief. Like setting down something that you've been carrying for a long time."

"Yeah, it really is." Die tilted his head back and closed his eyes, just relaxing there. "Now that we're not, I don't know how I managed to keep it in all these years."

Kyo hummed softly, sitting there for a moment before leaning over and nuzzling against Die's neck. "Mm, me either..."

Die reached up to dig his hand into Kyo's hair, grasping a few strands and just holding on in a very contented sort of way. He took another sip of Sprite and then put it back down. "I think I'm getting old... got aches in weird places after the show."

Kyo hummed softly, kissing Die's neck then lifting his head a bit though not entirely pulling away. "We could always order a massage or go to the hotel's sauna."

"Mmm... massage time sounds like an excellent plan. I don't even know the word for it here though." He glanced up as the waitress looked like she was about to come by and then sort of started to veer off toward the desk, blushing quite a lot. 

"I think we just broke the waitress. Maybe she didn't hear the news yet."

Kyo shrugged. "There's a menu thing in the room that has English I think..." He flicked his eyes up, watching the blushing waitress. "Perhaps. She's adorable...I think she likes you." He chuckled and sat up, kissing Die's cheek before pouring himself another small bit of wine. "I want dessert. Pick something you can feed to me while I make googly eyes at you."

Die actually burst out laughing, grabbing Kyo's thigh in exchange for his hair and shaking his head. "Okay, will do." He peered out past the end of the booth and made a little hand signal. 

The waitress was holding a tray for another table and nodded toward him to let him know she'd seen him before rushing off to deliver the food. While she was all the way over there, Die murmured, "Do you really think she does? I think it almost more seems like... I dunno... that we are who we are? Or am I just that oblivious?"

Kyo grinned then shrugged, resting his hand on Die's. "Maybe it's just who we are. You know I'm not entirely used to going out while we're overseas. It's hard to read them."

"Mmm… guess we'll never know." Die smiled a bit and then waited until the waitress came over, asking for a box for their leftovers and then whatever dessert she recommended, leaving it completely up to her.

She dashed back off and Die settled back again, yawning a little.

Kyo nodded and offered the waitress a small smile as Die spoke to her. When she was gone, he rolled his neck, grunting as it popped a couple of times. "You're not the only one sore. I might have overdone it a bit."

"You always overdo it a bit," Die returned, his voice easy and gentle.

Kyo sniffed, reaching up to rub his nose before settling against Die's once more. "You think so? I never really notice how far I get into it when I'm up there."

"I know you don't; that's why I don't ever call you on it. But yeah... it's a pretty often sort of thing."

The vocalist's eyebrows knitted together at Die's reply. "Mm...art cannot be contained." He turned to peer at Die, smiling softly. "Especially within myself. It has to come out, or I'll explode I think."

Die wetted his lips a little and then, unable to help himself, let a huge grin spread over his lips. "I think the fans would love it if you 'exploded' on stage, darling."

Kyo chuckled, rubbing his hands over his thighs. "I'm sure they would." He looked up, noticing the waitress heading their way with their dessert, something that looked like pie.

"I would, too," Die rumbled out, a naughty edge to his voice before he put on a more innocent face as the waitress appeared at the table. He smiled very softly at her and watched as her hands shook as she put down the plate and explained hurriedly what it was to them. She placed a box down and timidly asked, "Would you like me to box up the leftovers or..." she trailed off then.

Kyo smirked at Die's tone then glanced up at the waitress. He watched her trembling hands and offered a kind smile. "That's fine. We'll take care of it. Thank you," he said quietly.

Die watched her for a moment and then, finally reached into his pocket, rooted around and came up with a guitar pick. He placed it on the table in front of her and gave her a mild look. "For you."

She about looked like she'd faint as she picked it up and breathed out, "Thank you, Die." 

He grinned at her, confirming that she definitely knew who they were, and nodded. "Sure. You going tonight?"

She looked absolutely distraught and then shook her head. "I can't."

"Why? Are you working?"

She shook her head again, shoulders slumping and then managed to get out, "Not enough money for tickets. I didn't want to go alone and didn't have enough for two. So..." she swallowed hard. "I'm so sorry."

Kyo smiled as Die came up with a pick, wishing he'd thought to have something of his own to give her. He followed the thread of the conversation, watching the disappointment etch across her face after Die questioned if she was attending their show. 

He licked his lips and reached into his pocket, pulling out his phone. He looked up at her again and spoke. "What is your name?"

She looked faintly shocked to hear Kyo enter the conversation and then managed to breathe out, "Helmi."

Kyo nodded, pulling up a text to their staff. After typing for a moment, he hit send then put his phone away, smiling. "Go to the box office, and tell them your name. You've got two VIPs waiting."

She stared at him in absolute shock and then, shoving her hand against her mouth, she started to cry, utterly unable to hold it back.

Die pushed himself out of the booth instantly, holding out his arms and accepting it when she nearly crash-landed into them, her face against his shirt. He just held her for a few moments before he murmured, "For what it's worth, I understand not wanting to go alone. I hate eating out by myself; it feels strange... and on a bad day, it makes me anxious. So, I understand... and I understand this reaction, too, so please don't be embarrassed about it later, okay?"

Kyo watched as the girl started to cry and as Die stood up and hugged her. He just smiled, shaking his head as his lover proved that he was a true saint.

Once she composed herself at least a little, she mopped her eyes and then managed to say thank you at least five ways before she darted off back toward the kitchen area.

Die settled back down and looked toward Kyo. "Told you... just knew us, not infatuated with me."

Kyo gave her a little wave then looked at Die, huffing out a laugh. "She's never going to forget that moment..."

"Nope. But it could have just changed a lot." He crossed his legs and leaned against Kyo's side. "From that reaction, she was probably already thanking every god that would listen that she saw us when she couldn't _see_ us tonight. And now… this."

Kyo hummed softly. "Yeah." He paused for a moment, looking thoughtful. "We probably just made her year. It's kind of hard to comprehend, really."

Die reached over and gently fluffed Kyo's hair before nudging the forgotten dessert closer to him. "You get first bite, darling."

Kyo smiled then grabbed up a fork, digging into the berry pie and taking a bite. As he chewed, he let out a soft pleased sound.

Die picked up his fork as well and then leaned over to take a bite from the treat, closing his eyes as he savored the bite and then nodding. "That is great, actually."

Kyo nodded, stealing another bite, gathering up some of the ice cream with it. "Very good, rich flavor."

"I like the little crumbles on top." Die ate a few more healthy bites and then put his fork down. After a few seconds, he patted his stomach and let out a tiny burp.

Kyo nodded, eating a bit more then finishing off the ice cream. He wiped his mouth and washed it down with the rest of his wine before glancing at Die. "You forgot the part where you were gonna feed it to me..."

Die glanced at him and then gave him a sheepish look. "Shit, I sort of forgot.... real well. My bad."

Kyo shook his head, laughing softly. "You were too busy flirting with that waitress," he teased.

"Flirting, my ass." Die made fish-lips at Kyo and then rolled his eyes, before placing his food into the to-go package.

A few moments passed and the older woman from behind the counter came to place their check on the table. "Thank you, gentlemen. Your waitress will cash you out when you're ready. How was everything?"

Kyo snorted and helped get everything packaged up. He looked up at the woman as she brought their check. "It was good, thank you."

She gave them a bob of her head and then departed the table. Die pulled out his wallet and shuffled through for some bills until he had enough in local currency to place out. He pulled out his phone and began to Google if he was supposed to leave a tip in this country or not, a little crease between his eyebrows as he did so.

Kyo gave a yawn, squirming in his seat. The wine had made its way through his system quickly, and now he was feeling the effects of it on his bladder.

Die couldn't help but notice the squirming, putting his hand on Kyo's thigh as he scrolled through a forum, muddling through the English of it before finally realizing he could round up to the nearest whole bill and that was considered normal, but more than that was somewhat hazy and possibly not okay or maybe was... the rules were strange to him, and he just settled on their tip had come in the form of items anyway. He made sure he had the right amount and then put his phone away, squeezing Kyo's thigh again as they waited on the waitress to come back.

Kyo settled when Die's hand squeezed his thigh, reaching out to place his own on top. "Need to pee," he said quietly, looking around to see if their waitress was nearby.

"I can tell," Die murmured, the way he said it making it clear he was pleased with this fact.

Kyo licked his lips, letting out a sound as he shifted in his seat again. "Not gonna let me out?"

"Nope." Die picked up his Sprite and drained the rest of it, letting out a satisfied, "Ahh," just after and smacking his lips.

The vocalist puffed his cheeks out then attempted to just relax, purposely leaning against Die as he did. "So, this was nice...dinner, I mean."

"It was. I'm glad we're out like this... together and without so much worry, like usual."

Kyo nodded, leaning up to kiss Die's cheek. "Yeah, me, too."

The waitress chose right then to return to the table and pick up their check. Die thanked her quietly and then he slid from the booth, collecting the container and holding out his hand to Kyo.

Kyo grasped Die's hand and slid out of the booth as well, smiling. "See you tonight," he murmured to the waitress as he picked up his own container.

She nodded vigorously and then offered them good tidings in her native tongue, Die returning the sentiment in Japanese before they departed the restaurant. Once outside, he paused and then studied the place across the street, a smoke shop featuring loads of choice cigars. "One for the sake of it, and then watch me like a hawk that I don't have anymore?"

Kyo followed Die's gaze then nodded. "Alright."

Making their way across the street, Die held open the door for Kyo and then followed inside the delectably scented place. It all smelled of fine tobacco, and he could feel his pulse race at the very idea of getting something great from here. "I don't even know where to start," he confessed quietly.

Kyo followed along with Die, stepping into the small shop and giving it a sniff. It smelled nostalgic to him, and he found himself drawn to a display proclaiming cherry flavor. "I don't know, either..."

Die went over to a whole wall of slim cigars, picking up a few and sniffing them until he found one that smelled like heaven, his eyelids hooding at the sheer smell of it. "Ah yeah," he breathed out, picking it up and then grasping a second one for Kaoru. "I found my heaven... have you?"

Kyo turned and walked over to Die, watching him with a smirk. He reached out and slid his arm around his waist. "Yeah, I have."

"Aww, you're adorable." Die chuckled and then reached back to pat Kyo's side. "I meant if you wanted something from here, but that was heart-meltingly, tooth-achingly sweet of you, darling."

Kyo chuckled, releasing Die. "I don't think I should...as good as it all looks." He pouted slightly, picking up one to inspect.

"Mmm... kiss me afterward then. You can taste it at least." Die shifted away from Kyo and toward the cashier, picking up a cheapo cutter and a lighter he thought Kaoru might like as well, since he wasn't carrying his own anymore. Once everything was paid for and bagged, he rolled up the bag and tucked it into his pocket, heading back toward the door.  
Kyo smirked. "Mm, sounds like a plan." He wandered over to look at a few of the more exotic varieties while Die paid then turned to follow his lover out.

Once outside, Die led the way back to the main road and flagged a taxi down, giving just the address, nothing more, since he didn't speak Finnish, and then sat back, his hand resting on the seat between them, seeing if Kyo would notice it or not.

Kyo slipped into the taxi beside Die, buckling up then glancing down, spotting Die's hand. He smiled softly and reached down, covering it with his own. He was quiet until the taxi hit a bump, forcibly reminding him of his fully bladder. "Ah, fuck...," he groaned out.

Die blinked at him and then remembered what was going on below Kyo's belt. He smirked and squeezed his lover's hand, side-eying his crotch. "Not until I say."

Kyo squirmed in the seat, squeezing Die's hand rather tightly. "You're cruel," he issued without malice.

"And you love it." Die shifted slightly and then leaned forward a bit, studying how much anyone could see from the front. He decided it wasn't worth it and settled back into place.

Kyo snorted and shifted around some more. After a few minutes, he decided distraction was a good plan. Scooting closer to Die, he reached up and cupped his face turning it towards his own. Moving in, he kissed his lover fully on the lips, not caring that their driver could probably see.

Die gasped softly at the contact, leaning in closer and kissing Kyo back eagerly. He was sincerely pleased with what was happening at the moment.

Kyo smiled against Die's lips, pushing his hand up into the other's hair. Tilting his head, he deepened the kiss, swiping his tongue along the seam of Die's lips.

Pushing his tongue into Kyo's mouth, Die gave up on all pretense whatsoever, letting out a tiny groan of pleasure as it was deepened. Pleasure coursed through him, rampant and overwhelming to be _freely_ doing this with him.

Once Die let it go to the next level, Kyo stopped holding back. He made a sound, intense desire welling up inside him as they blatantly made out in the back of a taxi like any normal, regular couple. It was indescribable.

Die let his hand trail down the other's chest, thumb lightly circling a nipple before he slid his hand down further, resting it on his abdomen. Breaking the kiss for a moment, he breathed the word, "Perfect," across his lips before delving back in.

A shiver went through Kyo as his nipple hardened at Die's attention. He tilted his hips up, tugging his lover's hair slightly before losing himself in the kiss once more. Perfect, indeed.

It took him a few more moments before Die let up, backing off and wiping a hand over his mouth. "Shit, baby... all of this feels good."

When Die pulled back, Kyo let out a breath, his tongue running over his slightly swollen lips. "Yeah it does. So damn good."

The taxi arrived at their hotel, and Die pulled out the amount that was displayed on the little screen, handing it over and receiving change back. Once he did, he slid out of the car, holding on tight to their leftover box and waiting on Kyo to get out as well.

Kyo quickly unbuckled and slipped out of the car, anxious now to get up to their room. His bladder was achingly full and his pants were rather tight at this point.

Trailing along after Kyo, Die entered the hotel and signed in at the front desk, something Masa had been making them do the whole tour for one reason or another. Perhaps to keep track of them, perhaps another reason Die didn't really give two shits about. He only knew they had to, and that... was that. He paused at the elevator, punching the up arrow and then bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet as he waited on the elevator to come down for them.

Kyo quickly signed in as well, barely scribbling out his name before moving over to the elevator bank. He shifted from foot to foot, huffing out an impatient breath. The elevator finally came, a ding announcing its arrival. As the doors slid open, Kyo eagerly stepped forward and then into the elevator, punching the button for their floor.

Die stepped in beside him and moved to lean against the railing, closing his eyes for a few moments as they ascended. "Mmm... you don't go until I say so." The words were delivered very calmly, as though he were talking about how good dinner had been, not about Kyo needing to piss. The smallest of smirks crept onto his lips.

Kyo shivered at the words, glancing over at his lover. "Cruel...don't make me wait too long; I might just piss my pants..."

Die made a noncommittal sound and then stepped forward as the elevator slowed down. Once it stopped and the doors opened, he headed out down the hallway, his steps quick.

At the door, he slid the key card in and opened it, walking right on in and heading into the bathroom, tossing the food on the counter, and then closing the bathroom door behind himself.

Kyo followed along, anticipation bubbling up within him as they got to their room. Entering, he paused long enough to remove his shoes and jacket before he headed over to the bathroom, staring at the closed door. 

He stood there for a moment, scowling at it. "Die? Die, what are you doing?"

Die smirked toward the door as he took his time unfastening his pants and then pulling down the spare towel from the rack. Tossing it on the floor beside the toilet, he opened the toilet, letting the lid clank back and then tilted his hips toward the towel instead, unleashing his bladder with a quiet moan, watching it splash down onto the towel. It almost felt dirtier this way, pissing where he shouldn't while he _could_ be doing it into the toilet bowl only inches away.

Kyo stood there, waiting on an answer from Die when he heard the sound of the toilet lid. Die was obviously relieving himself while letting him suffer. "That isn't fair, Daisuke," Kyo complained, opening the door up. The scene that greeted him made him groan quietly, both out of desperation from his bladder and because it was outright dirty.

Die flicked his gaze up at Kyo as he finished pissing, shaking off and then stepping back from the toilet. He made sure his pee was contained to the towel and not the floor and then tucked his dick away, not bothering to zip up, but keeping himself inside his underwear. He walked past Kyo and went to wash his hands. "Come and wash up." This, in and of itself, was a new brand of torture, as he knew exactly how it felt to wash your hands while needing to urinate as badly as Kyo plainly did.

Kyo had reached down to grasp his cock through his pants, squeezing it, uttering a soft groan. He glanced at the toilet, the urge to go quite strong at this point. He wondered just what Die would do if he took matters into his own hands and pissed without permission. Putting that thought aside, he moved over to the sink and began washing his hands, dancing in place as he did.

Die watched him for a few moments and then shoved the food into the mini fridge under the sink, padding off to the bedroom area. "Come in here and sit on the chair in the corner when you do. You may remove things from your pockets, but that is all."

Kyo nodded, taking a moment to wash his face as well. He dried off then headed into the bedroom, dumping the stuff from his pockets onto the dresser before plopping down in the indicated chair. 

"Gonna torture me all night?"

"You betcha. I might not let you go before you go on stage." Die smirked and then pulled off his shirt, tossing it aside and plopping himself down on the bed on his stomach, flipping on the TV with the remote from the little tray on the end of the bed.

Kyo's eyes widened then narrowed. "That's not even funny. Besides...I thought you wanted to get laid tonight."

"Mmm... I do. And preferably before we go on stage." Die glanced at him and smirked.

Kyo licked his lips, squirming _just so_ in the chair. "Then don't torture me for too long...or I might have to turn it around."

Die instantly looked at him and shot him a look that clearly showed he was in charge. "You will _not_ turn things around."

The look his lover gave him sent lust boiling in Kyo's veins. He barely hid a smirk as he lowered his eyes, his hands sliding over his thighs.

"Mmm... I see, that's how I thought you'd want to be behaving about this." Die looked back at the TV then, watching a show he didn't even care about for the sake of avoiding looking at Kyo.

Kyo only grunted in response, squirming around in his seat again. He ignored the TV completely, focused instead on finding ways to stimulate his dick without touching it, making little sighs and groans as he did.

"Sit still," Die murmured quietly. His own arousal was growing quite steadily, pressing thick against the bed. He pushed his hips down just the smallest amount, the way that would go unnoticed as anything but a simple shift, arousal thrumming in his veins.

Kyo huffed and settled once more, crossing his arms. He was reaching his limit, his cock flexing in a way that let him know urination was imminent.

Die started to watch Kyo instead of the TV when he became dangerously still. He still feigned at watching the TV, not letting Kyo know he was watching just yet. Soon, he'd start to tremble and sweat, desperation coming, and Die was intent on such a thing to happen right before his eyes.

It wasn't much longer before Kyo was grabbing at the front of his pants. His hold on his bladder was breaking, shudders going through him every few moments as he tried desperately to hold back. Finally, when a small spurt leaked out, his eyes squeezed shut, he let out a plea. "Die...I can't...it's coming out."

Die finally fully looked at him, slowly wetting his lips as he pushed himself up from the bed. "Count to ten, very slowly, and then make a run for it, darling." His voice was dark and thick with his desire, his cock pushing against his jeans harshly. He knew how the counting would affect him, how much it would put a strain on him, and how very _very_ much it upped the potential of Kyo losing it before he ever got to ten, much less to the restroom. The anticipation would drive him mad, the countdown to ability to use the restroom fooling his brain and tricking his bladder. It was cruel... and delicious at the same time.

Kyo looked at Die as he took a breath then started counting. He got to 5 and let out a sound as another bit leaked out. Clawing the arm of the chair, his hips jerking, he continued, getting to 9 before he stilled. He squeezed his eyes shut as his body finally gave up and piss began spurting from his cock. "A-ah...fuck...no."

Die smirked, getting up and smoothly moving to the chair and pushing it back onto the little tiled area and then stood in front of Kyo, watching him piss himself. "Do you have any idea," he breathed out, "just how much this does it for me? Out of all the fucked up things in this world... this is what makes me nearly jizz my pants."

Kyo let out a gasp as Die moved the chair, his eyes flicking up to his lover's face. The heat and desire simmering in the other's eyes made him moan, despite the fact that he was still actively pissing his pants. "Glad I could...ah...please you so much...," he uttered, not entirely able to articulate his thoughts.

Curling his fingers into Kyo's hair, he slowly pulled his head back and breathed out, "Stop."

The vocalist tried to stop the flow, letting out a tiny cry as he succeeded but then lost his hold. He tried again, managing this time. "I can't...not for long..."

Die reached down, unfastening his pants and sliding damp boxer briefs aside, revealing his cock. "Let go again." He let a stream of air out over the other's cock, watching attentively to see when he would start to urinate again.

Kyo whimpered as Die opened his pants, exposing his length to the air. He took a breath trying to calm himself before gladly doing as Die commanded, letting his piss flow freely once more. "Oh gods..."

"Mmm... that's right, you'll get to have your fun for giving me this one, I promise." He reached to lightly stroke his cock, watching the other pissing so hard still. "God you, had so much in you. You weren't lying about not being able to keep it in, were you?"

Kyo dropped his head back, his hips tilting upward when Die began stroking him. "Uh uh…had to go so bad...," he murmured, shivering as he gave a hard push for Die's benefit.

"When you're done, strip off and we'll deal with the puddle later. Right now, you get to find your pleasure in my body." He smiled at him and then licked his finger before turning and walking back to the bed, pushing off his pants as he went.

Kyo watched Die move back to the bed. He relaxed against the chair, pushing the rest of his piss out then sighing, taking a moment to relish the relief he felt. He finally stood up, avoiding the puddle he'd made. Stripping out of his clothes, he stepped over to the bed, licking his lips. "Are you finished bossing me around, or should I ask nicely for you to clean my cock up with your mouth?"

Die sprawled himself out on the bed in a starfish type fashion, his cock almost comically hard, jutting up from his body in a lewd display of his arousal. When Kyo queried him about cleaning his cock off, he managed a deep rumble of a laugh, turning near-glassy eyes toward him, already losing the battle against his lust. Something had him gripped tight, and hell if he wasn't so horny he could barely handle it right then. "I'll lick it clean if you stick your fingers up my ass while I do it. Otherwise, no deal, and get your cock in there first."

Kyo stared at his lover for a few moments, chucking softly. "Deal..." He brought his fingers up to his mouth, sucking them lewdly.

Die turned his head and closed his eyes, parting his lips just enough for Kyo to get the general idea of what he was wanting.

Kyo shifted up on the bed, kneeling beside Die's head as he dragged his wet fingers over his lover's chest. He paused at his nipple, tweaking and rolling the pert bud.

Die let out a soft hum and then shifted until he felt Kyo's cock bump against his cheek. With a quiet, pleased sound, he wrapped his lips around the head and suckled for a bit before letting it go in favor of licking blindly around. Feeling but not seeing was turning him on even more, and he found himself panting in a matter of a few seconds.

Kyo watched with lidded eyes, Die's mouth sending pleasure coursing through him. He rolled his hips slightly, letting out a soft moan while letting his fingers trail lower, skirting around Die's cock.

Die finally found Kyo's balls with his mouth, the other's cock pressing against his cheek, damp with saliva as he began to mouth the delicate globe, tongue flicking in pretense of cleaning him off.

When Die began working on his balls, Kyo paused his actions, letting out a throaty moan. His cock twitched against Die's cheek, and he shuddered, reaching down with his other hand to thread fingers into Die's hair. "Fuck, baby..."

Letting out a whimper, Die spread his legs a bit more and breathed out, "Please," after a few moments.

The quiet plea spurred Kyo into action. He shifted a bit then slid his hand back, stroking over Die's taint and up along his crack. He circled his entrance slowly for a moment before finally easing the tip of his finger in.

Die breathed out a quiet pant when Kyo finally touched him how he wanted him to. His eyelids fluttered, and he strained his hips slightly upward before he settled again, going back to sucking the head of Kyo's prick.

Kyo let out a moan as Die started sucking him again. He repaid the action by pushing his finger in deeper, wiggling and thrusting it a bit.

Eagerly, Die took more of his cock in, wondering what more it would get him. He groaned around him, working up a lot of saliva and starting to bob his head repeatedly.

Kyo shuddered as Die went after him more, the hand tangled in red locks tugging a bit harshly. "Oh fuck, yeah...just like that," he moaned out. He pulled hand away from Die's body for a moment to spit on his fingers. After rubbing the saliva around, he dropped his hand between Die's legs once more, pushing two digits into his lover's body.

Moaning loudly, Die reached for Kyo's hips, trying to get him to fuck his mouth as he sucked, his knees drawing up a bit to spread himself the last bit for Kyo.

Kyo shifted as Die pulled on him, a smirk playing on his lips. He repositioned himself to have better access to both of Die's orifices. He started thrusting into his lover's mouth at the same time he fingered his asshole, groaning.

Die's arousal couldn't have been more prominent than it was with Kyo's dick in his mouth. The guitarist lay there, taking everything he was being given with the utmost porn-ish grace that he could manage.

Kyo kept fucking Die's mouth and ass simultaneously, his cock throbbing as he pushed it between his lover's lips. He dropped his head back, letting the pleasure take him over as he let out a loud moan.

Die finally moved his head gave Kyo a pleading look.

Kyo gazed down when Die moved his head. He licked his lips, pushing his fingers in deeper. "You want more?"

"I want your cock elsewhere... and you damn well know it," Die shot back.

Kyo chuckled and thrust his fingers a few more times, curling them just so before easing them out. After quickly wiping them off on some tissues, he moved to the head of the bed. 

He propped himself up against the pillows, smirking at Die as he patted his thigh. "C'mere and sit on my dick."

Die let out a thin whine at having to move. He'd really wanted to just watch Kyo thrust above him. But right then, he was also too desperate to argue. He'd ask for what he wanted later. Maybe after the show. Right now, he wanted relief.

Pushing himself up, he crawled up the bed and turned to put his back to Kyo, shifting over his lap and then sliding back until he found his dick, rubbing against it and then slowly sliding down on it. A few more seconds, and he leaned back against Kyo and started to move his hips, one arm reaching back to hold the back of Kyo's head.

Kyo watched Die with lustful eyes as other moved into place. He released a low groan when Die sheathed his cock within his body, his hand coming up to grip his lover's hip. As they began to move, Kyo leaned forward and sank his teeth into Die's shoulder, making no effort to not leave a mark.

Die cried out and pulled on Kyo's hair, keeping moving as he was marked so clearly by the other. All of his outfits for the tour were tank tops and there was no way he'd hide it away even if he wanted to. But he didn't want to, and it set him off faster than anything else could have to have such an act performed so willingly by Kyo upon his body. He rocked his hips, moaning.

Kyo licked the spot then moved to another, groaning as he bit into Die's skin. It felt so damn good to do this freely, to not care about what anyone thought. He shifted his knees up, pushing up into Die's body more frantically, his hand slipping around to grasp his cock. "Fuck!"

Die let out a startled cry, the end of it jagged, broken by his voice cracking and shattering like glass fallen to the floor. Without warning or preamble, he lost himself, jizz shooting further than he'd managed in a good long while as he spurted all over the bed between Kyo's legs, his grip on Kyo's hair none to gentle in the process, even as he began to sag forward, nearly blacking out from the intensity and how it took his breath away.

Kyo hissed out as Die began to cum so hard, the squeeze of his inner muscles on his dick making him shudder. Pain laced through his scalp as Die pulled his hair in the process but he didn't care. He kept stroking his lover's cock as he pushed up into him, so close to his own release.

Die clung to reality, his vision blurring and his breath coming out in sharp pants. He knew Kyo would stop if he passed out, but god was that other side ever so inviting at the moment. Finally, he choked out, "Don't... stop..." before letting go of Kyo's hair and letting his hands fall to the bed, the world dimming around him.

Kyo watched as Die slumped forward, very nearly stopping but he heeded Die's plea and instead shifted them both, pushing Die down onto the bed. He grabbed his hips and resumed thrusting hard into Die's body. "F-fuck!"

In those few blissful seconds it took for Kyo to shift them, Die let go entirely, planting his face into the bed and going utterly lax in Kyo's grip; spent and pleased beyond measure.

It wasn't long before Kyo reached his limit. He slammed into Die once more then stilled as he began to cum. He let out cry as he emptied himself into Die, spurt after spurt shooting into his lover's passage.

Die lay there, his body unmoving except for the rise and fall of his breath as it came and went. Kyo slumped against Die's back, his body molded against Die's for the time being. He nuzzled the back of his lover's neck, placing half formed kisses here and there.

It took a few minutes, but Die finally came around, blinking himself back into reality and then breathing out a soft moan to have Kyo over him like this.

Kyo smiled when he heard Die moan, shifting just a bit to kiss his shoulder. "You're fucking perfect, you know that?"

"You, too, baby," Die breathed, chuckling softly as he became more aware of the fact that he'd just cum so suddenly and harshly that he'd passed out for the second time in his life during sex. "You uh... know I just blacked out, right?" He let out a little huff of a laugh afterward. "You fucked me into unconsciousness."

Kyo snorted, wriggling his hips faintly then groaning. "Yeah, I noticed...but you said don't stop so...I kept going."

"I meant it, too. I wanted you to cum, too... but it feels so good to just let it happen." He stretched out languidly under him and moaned a little again.

Kyo hummed, running a hand along Die's side and down over his hip. "I know...it's an indescribable feeling."

Die smirked a little and then breathed out, "Only the second time I've ever done that..."

The vocalist shifted, giving his hips a slight roll, shivering as he did. "Mm, really?"

"Really... you like... startled the orgasm out of me." He snorted a bit.

Kyo chuckled softly, sitting back finally though not moving away from Die. "Remind me to make it your third time very soon."

Die moved to sprawl out a bit more, though still draped over Kyo in the process. "Yes please. Just fuck me stupid, and then keep going until I'm back with you."

Kyo grunted as Die moved, his hands coming to hold onto his lover's hips. "I'll make sure to draw it out. Wait until you're with me again to fill you up so you can feel it."

"You're going to make me horny again... careful there." Die rubbed his face on the bed and then yawned a bit.

Kyo grinned and bucked his hips up. "And I'm supposed to care because?"

"You don't have time to wreck my asshole again before we have to get ready to go?"

The vocalist huffed and settled down, contenting himself with rubbing Die's thigh. "You're right...I'll just have to fuck you after the show..."

"Fuck... damn right you do." Die shifted a bit into the other's touches, a small smirk on his lips.

Kyo kept up with that for a while before finally patting his lover's leg. "Climb off before I really get hard again..."

Die pulled himself off of his lap and then flopped on his side, stretching until a few things popped before he closed his eyes. "Take your shower... ten minute nap and then my turn in the shower, hmm?"

Kyo shivered as Die pulled away, his softened cock twitching faintly. He glanced down at the lovely mess they'd made then nodded. "Sounds like a plan." He rolled himself off the bed and padded off to the bathroom for his shower.

Die curled up, letting his body relax as he drifted somewhere between wakefulness and sleep. Some things were perfect... and one of those things was Kyo.


	89. Chapter 89

Die chewed his lip nervously, looking over all the papers in front of him. He'd been mulling over a few ideas for a couple of weeks now, but still wasn't completely set on the last details of their ceremony. Most of it was planned and booked and invites had already gone out for the main wedding ceremony and part of them for the reception, though he was waiting to hear back from all of them before continuing down the list. 

All of that combined with debating trying out something new in his life had him under a good bit of stress. Enough so that he had completely neglected his sex life for well over a week now. A few more lines on a paper and then a check written for a bill, offhandedly. He shifted again in his chair, making a face at how uncomfortable he suddenly was. 

He stuck his foot up on the rung of the chair next to him and moved again, jerking a little in surprise as his jeans rubbed over the head of his dick in a slightly painful sort of way. Looking down, he blinked at his very erect cock, letting out a huff of a laugh.

He was so up in his own head that he hadn't even noticed that was why he'd been shifting around like crazy for nearly fifteen minutes now. He yanked at his pants and sighed, tossing his pen down and standing up. Padding off toward the living room, he found his lover curled up on the couch. 

Coming to stand in front of him, he cleared his throat and then put on his best pleading look. "Fix it." He pointed at the nearly comical tent in his pants and put a huge frown on his face for Kyo's benefit.

Kyo had been half-assed watching a movie when his lover's rather hard cock appeared in his line of vision. He glanced up at the redhead then back down, huffing out a soft laugh. "That looks extremely uncomfortable," he murmured, reaching out to brush his hand over the tent in Die's pants.

Die actually winced when Kyo touched it, the zipper not doing great things to him. He nodded and then made a face, already reaching for his belt, starting to unfasten it. "Oh... well past uncomfortable and far into painful, actually."

Kyo watched Die's hands for a moment before batting them out of the way, taking over the job. He clucked his tongue as he lowered the other's zipper, easing his pants open. "What's got you this worked up?" he questioned while grasping the waistband of his underwear, pulling them down to gain access to his cock.

"I have... no idea." Die moved closer to Kyo, sighing in relief as he was freed from the pants and undergarments. He flexed his cock hard and then eased up, wetting his lips. "I was working on stuff and... noticed."

Kyo hummed, peering at Die's cock, deciding which way he wanted to proceed. "That's a rare occurrence for you..." He shifted in his seat a bit before reaching out and wrapping his fingers around Die, slowly stroking them up and down the shaft. "Gorgeous as ever," he said quietly before leaning in to press a kiss to the very tip.

"I've been... preoccupied," Die returned quietly, taking a shuddering breath as Kyo touched him. His hips canted forward slightly and then Kyo's lips touched the tip of his dick, making him groan. "Ah yeah," he barely whispered, his eyes closing and his mouth hanging open slightly, the perfect look of bliss on his face.

Kyo merely shook his head, reaching out to grab Die's hips, pulling him forward a bit. Once he had him where he wanted him, he glanced up. "Die, watch me. Watch your cock disappear into my mouth." With that, he parted his lips and wrapped them around his lover's stiff length, slowly pushing down on him. Once he was half way, he pulled back up, working up a good amount of spit before sliding back down, going further and further.

Die opened his eyes at his lover's request, easily following all of his instructions. As his cock slid into Kyo's mouth, his breath hitched, and he bit down hard on his lower lip, looking nearly pained for a moment. And then Kyo was sliding back up, and Die nearly went cross-eyed with pleasure, moaning in a nearly porn-ish manner as his lover took him back into his mouth again.

Kyo gave a satisfied groan at Die's reactions as he bobbed his head, slicking Die's cock up to make things easier on himself. He grasped Die's hips, taking more of his cock into his mouth and throat, finally coming to a rest at the base. Moaning lowly, he swallowed around his lover, tasting him, relishing the feeling of his entire cock in his mouth.

Die's hands flexed at his sides, forming fists and then releasing, straining outward and then relaxing again. His eyelids kept trying to flutter shut, but he kept them open for Kyo's directions, watching him as he took him into his mouth completely. 

The moment he was fully within Kyo's mouth and the vocalist swallowed around him, Die let out an incoherent string of sounds, ending in a thin whine as he very nearly came. Only through sheer will and a couple of very strained sounds did he manage to hold himself back, staring down at Kyo with wild eyes.

Kyo took his time, swallowing around Die a few more times before easing back. "You're gorgeous like this, darling. I love seeing the strain of desire on your face." He flicked his tongue out, stroking it over the head of Die's cock, his hand wrapping around the base of it, stroking slowly.

When Kyo started moving again, pulling back and talking to him for a moment, Die allowed his eyes to close again, a thin whine leaving him. When Kyo started tonguing him and stroking his length, Die pushed his hips forward eagerly, rocking against Kyo's hand as he panted.

Kyo kept up what he was doing, using his tongue on the head of Die's cock while stroking him, gradually speeding up the pace. His free hand came up to cup his sac, squeezing lightly.

Die's hips strained forward, and his eyes rolled back in his head. Years of realizing he didn't have to warn Kyo at all allowed him to simply let himself fall over the edge. With a sigh of pleasure, he began to spurt all over Kyo's pretty lips, drenching them in his cum. Little moans left him as he came, his hips ever so gently shifting.

The instant Die began to cum, Kyo leaned back just so, allowing his cum to spatter all over his lips. He groaned softly, milking Die's cock with his hand until he was certain the other was finished. He pulled away then, licking his cum-stained lips slowly. "So sweet...."

Die just stood there, panting, his eyes closed until he was sure he could deal with reality again. Wetting his lips, he slowly opened his eyes and peered down at the mess he'd made of Kyo's lips. A small smile slid over his lips and he made a satisfied noise in the back of his throat. "I think... I'm going to start my own band."

Kyo settled back, his hand going to squeeze his mostly hard cock for a moment. He grunted then released himself, looking up at Die, about to ask him to sit in his lap. Instead, Die dropped a bomb on him in terms of news that left him gaping. "You...what?"

Die scratched his head, giving Kyo a sheepish look. "I think you just blew my brains out... uh... so to speak." He shifted, settling astride Kyo's lap, shifting his pants around and covering up his cock for the moment with his underwear. 

Biting his lip and then releasing the abused flesh, he gave him a lop-sided grin. "I've been tossing the idea around, and I don't know... as I was cumming, it just sort of landed on me that... I need to do this. Stop just thinking about it and act."

Kyo's hands went to Die's hips, steadying him in his lap. He pursed his lips, stroking over the other's hipbones with his thumbs. "I think that's a wonderful idea if that's what you want to do...."

Die nuzzled up under Kyo's jaw, rubbing his unshaven cheek against Kyo's jaw. He closed his eyes and smiled softly. "I love the stage so much... I always want more of it... and I mean... you know I've always loved to sing..." he trailed off, letting Kyo make of it what he would while he began to suck on a spot just below Kyo's ear, knowing it usually set Kyo off like a firecracker.

Kyo let out a soft sound, moving one hand to push into Die's hair. He shivered faintly, squirming beneath Die. "Sing? You would sing?," he questioned, barely getting the words out before he moaned, Die's mouth on his skin sending white hot desire surging through him

Die tongued the place real good, flicking the tip over it and then pressing a hard kiss to the flesh. Pulling back, he smiled a bit at Kyo, his eyes glittering. "Thought you'd like that." Moving back in, he ducked under Kyo's chin, using one hand to pull his head back and attached himself to his lover's Adam's apple, slurping on it with an abandon that clearly was uncaring about how much noise he was making.

Kyo shuddered again, his hips canting upward. "I..hnng...yeah," he managed, swallowing hard as Die's mouth attached to his Adam's apple. His hand gripped Die's thigh a bit harshly as he let out a few pants of breath, clearly more than a little aroused from his actions.

Releasing him, Die chuckled. "Talk later... fuck now. I just blurted it out... but now you know your blowjob made me make up my mind." He nipped at the flesh and then stood up, yanking his shirt off and then shimmying out of his pants and underwear, straddling Kyo once again.

"Lube better still be between the cushions. I'm not leaving." He began to work on unfastening Kyo's pants, relishing in the other's jean-clad thighs beneath his own naked ones.

Kyo huffed out a breathless laugh, his hips pushing upward again before he settled back. Licking his lips, he slid his hand up under his own shirt, tugging it up a bit to run his nails over his abdominal muscles. "So far as I know it is...."

"Then get it," Die murmured, chuckling just after, finally wrenching Kyo's pants open and freeing his cock. He played with the tip for a moment, smiling fondly down at it. "It's been too long, sweetness... I need you up my asshole again. You're gonna like that, aren't you?"

Kyo grunted and started digging for the lube, losing focus for a minute when Die freed his cock. He snorted at the conversation, flexing his cock for Die's benefit before finally finding the lube, holding it up like a prize trophy. "Here it is."

Die took it from him and then popped open the lid. With no preamble at all, he poured a bunch over Kyo's dick and closed it, settling himself where he could slide down on his dick easily. Pressing the head against his hole, he started to push himself down, breathing out an easy sigh as he relaxed onto Kyo's length, gently easing down his shaft.

Kyo let out a low sound when the lube dripped down onto his dick. He pushed up into the air a couple of times then settled, stilling himself for Die. As his lover's body engulfed his length, a moan of pure pleasure escaped him, his head dropping back against the couch. "Ah...fuck, Die."

"Mmmm... that's the idea, yes." Die grinned down at him as he began to slowly move over Kyo's body, letting his cock ease out a few inches and then sliding back down.

Kyo smirked at Die's cheeky response, moving one hand to swat his bare ass lightly. He flexed his cock as Die slid down, groaning at the sensation of it. "Look at you," he breathed out, "Completely naked and vulnerable for me."

Die gave him a sultry look and twisted his hips. His tongue slowly slicked over his upper lip and then disappeared back into his mouth as he moaned. "All for you... always for you, darling."

The vocalist moaned as well, reaching around to grab a handful of Die's ass, kneading the flesh a bit roughly. "Fucking right," he groaned out, jerking his hips upward, pushing himself deeper into Die's body.

Die completed their union as Kyo pushed upward, grinding himself downward on Kyo's dick. "Ah yeah... stick your cock in my asshole, baby... fuck me," he gritted out, instantly turning on the dirty talk rather than just being sultry.

The change in tone set Kyo off like a firecracker. He growled, squeezing Die's ass harder as he thrust up into his body. "Ah fuck yeah. Take my cock, Die."

Die grinned like he'd won the best lotto ticket in the history of lotto tickets. He ground himself down, rocking his hips hard and fast, his hands moving to cling to Kyo's shoulders as he moved harshly.

"Yeah, fuck yourself on my hard dick, Daisuke." Kyo slapped Die's ass, drawing his feet up to push harder into the other's body. Pleasure was overwhelming him, his body already straining for release. " _Fuck_!"

Moaning, Die rocked quicker on Kyo's cock, his now hard length rubbing against Kyo's belly with every movement, tucked up under the edge of his shirt as he moved.

Kyo gained enough thought to shift and tug his shirt down over Die's cock a bit, providing a new sensation as they moved. He pulled Die closer, fucking up hard into him as he raked his nails down his bare back.

Die gasped when Kyo moved to put the shirt down over him fully. Biting at his lip, he finally started to draw blood from the reddened flesh. His hips worked faster and he whined, arching into Kyo's touch. "F-fuck!"

Kyo spotted the blood and immediately leaned up to catch Die's lips in a messy kiss. He moaned into Die's mouth as he bucked his hips hard, nearing his peak.

Gasping, Die let Kyo suck at his lower lip, keeping up his pace, his own cock leaking pre-cum across Kyo's belly, just a little dribble here and there, but enough to be noticeable.

Kyo bit into Die's already bleeding lip, unable to help himself. He tensed his stomach muscles, leaning forward just a bit to give Die more surface to rub against. He slammed up into Die as hard as he could before finally releasing his lip and dropping his head back with a cry. Spurt after spurt filled Die's body, his thighs trembling with the effort.

Die whined and plunged down onto Kyo's cock as the other started to cum. He kept rocking, though gently now that Kyo was cumming, just letting him fill him up. "Ah yeah baby... fill me."

Kyo shuddered, riding his orgasm out, his hips still pushing up into his lover's body. He finally stilled, hands moving to rest on Die's hips, his breath coming in heavy pants. "Fuck...."

Stopping moving as well, Die leaned down to kiss at Kyo's neck, moaning softly as he moved his lips over the other's flesh, still for the time being.

Kyo wrapped his arms around Die, stroking his hands over his lover's back as he let out a soft sound. "So good, baby."

Die rested himself against Kyo, his eyelids heavy as he continued to ever so slightly move his hips as he kissed the other. "Need to..." he whispered softly.

Kyo groaned lowly, shifting a bit as he trailed his hand over Die's thigh. "Do it, do it for me, darling..."

Sliding off of Kyo's cock, Die moved down so that his length was sliding alongside Kyo's own as he began to thrust his hips, moaning softly as he moved, looking utterly pleased.

Kyo watched Die, his lips parting. "Ahh fuck...." He bucked his hips upward slightly.

Die shifted, reaching one hand down to hold Kyo's hip, thrusting against him with more and more excitement, finally starting to moan in complete abandon. Whimpering a bit, he dropped his head on Kyo's chest and watched what he was doing.

Kyo pushed his fingers through Die's hair, tugging lightly. He leaned into his love, watching him get off.

Shivering, Die spread his legs a bit more and then thrust hard a few dozen times. Moaning, he pulled back enough to let Kyo see as he began to pulse cum out over his lover's softening cock.

Kyo watched, letting out a soft sound. "Fucking gorgeous," he mumbled, watching Die jizz all over him. 

Die remained there, panting as he stared down between them for a few more seconds. He wetted his lips and then rolled to the side, flopping against the back of the couch and tossing his arm over his eyes.

Kyo huffed out a sound, pushing his hands over his face as he looked over at Die before letting out a soft laugh. "You're own band, hm? Should be amazing...," he stated quietly, reaching out to run his hand over Die's leg.

Wetting his lips a little, Die smiled. He reached to find Kyo's hand and held onto it. "I think... things will go okay. I just have to find the rest of the band now, I guess."

Kyo hummed, his eyes closed. He squeezed Die's hand absently, nodding a bit to himself. "I'm sure you will have no trouble convincing whoever you like to join in."

"Very true." Die stretched and then grinned. "Could just blow them all to convince them... assuming it's dudes."

Kyo released Die's hand only to smack his inner thigh. "I think not. I'm the only dude you're allowed to blow."

"Oh-ho... so starts the possessiveness." Die grinned and reached to lightly poke Kyo in the side, a teasing tone in his voice.

Kyo squirmed a bit before catching Die's wrist, pulling him closer. "You're damn right I'm possessive. Especially with you and other musicians. Think I'm gonna let some hot guitarist run off with you?"

"Darling," Die's voice changed from teasing to utterly serious in the drop of a hat. "There's no one on this planet - or off of it - that could take me away from you."

Kyo turned and peered at Die, ducking his head a bit embarrassed. "I'm glad...." He shifted until he could lean in and kiss Die's lips. "I do sincerely hope your band works out. You have my complete support."

"As you have always had mine, love." Die kissed his lover's nose before backing off and flopping back again. "Mmm... plans... so many plans... every plan. Jesus."

Kyo moved to rest his head against Die's chest. "Yes. So many plans and talks and meetings. I hated that part greatly..."

Die reached to lightly scratch the top of Kyo's head, humming softly. "S'okay... life, man."

Kyo nodded, yawning and rubbing his cheek against Die's chest. "Yep...life."

Die smiled softly, his eyes still closed as he relaxed there next to his lover. This... was gonna be a hell of a ride.

Kyo smiled to himself, already planning Die's band's debut at a Sukekiyo show sometime in the future. It would be quite the sight to see his lover doing his own thing and being happy.


	90. Chapter 90

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Die lay on his side next to Kyo, one arm propping his head up, hand covering just behind his ear, the other lazily resting across his own side. He'd woken up about an hour ago from a lousy ass dream in which he'd found out Kyo didn't remember a thing about their wedding date, the day he'd agreed upon. And even as he'd woken up, he had felt his heart shattering. 

Doubt and insecurity clouded him for a good part of the hour and only now was he starting to feel it lifting from him. His gaze hadn't moved from Kyo's sleeping face, from the wonderful visage of the man that meant the very most to him in the world.... the man he'd built his life and security around these past few years. And maybe, if he were honest, a good few before that, before he realized how deeply he'd become attached in the first place. 

Sure, everything had seemed so quick and so out of nowhere. A drunken confession of a fetish, and then they'd gone tumbling down the rabbit hole. He'd never expected this... or even that, in truth. But he didn't think he could live without it now. He reached to lightly ghost his fingertips over Kyo's lips, just lingering there to feel his breath over the pads of his fingers, his eyes both adoring and sad in the wake of the horrible turmoil the dream had caused. 

Without thinking, he lifted his hand away and whispered the first words that came to him, something he'd been reading months earlier. "Eros. Agape. Pragma. Storge. Mania." He let out a little breath and then offered a quiet, "Koishiteru," as he brought his hand to rest on Kyo's own.

Kyo was deeply asleep though his mind was still troubled. Vague images of Die's face twisted in anguish clouded his dreams, mixing with the turmoil that usually visited him during his sleeping hours. Something touched his lips and began to awaken, slowly fighting the cobwebs, surfacing from within himself. Die's voice spoke foreign words then a phrase he rarely heard from his lover's lips followed. His brow creased and he turned his hand, grasping Die's that had rested atop. 

Opening his eyes, he turned his head enough to see Die's face. "Koi...what is it?"

Die studied Kyo for a long moment before lifting Kyo's hand, bringing it to his lips and pressing a soft kiss to the decorated skin. "Nothing, love... I didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep."

Kyo let Die kiss his hand before moving to cup his lover's face, stroking his cheek with his thumb. "I can't, not now..." He shifted, pulling Die closer, nuzzling against his neck for a moment before pulling back again. "You...spoke Latin....didn't you?"

"Mmm... mostly Greek, some Danish... a lot of languages actually." Die turned his head to allow Kyo a bit more access if he wanted it, his hand focusing on twining his fingers with Kyo's other hand, his eyelids feeling heavy despite the full night of sleep.

Kyo hummed softly, leaning in to place soft kisses along Die's neck. "What'd you say? Was it some ancient curse?"

Die gave a soft chuckle at that. "Maybe...." he eased Kyo back, leaning over him and nuzzling up under his jaw. "No... Eros... it's a passionate sort of love. Physical and emotional, something that provides security and contentment. An aesthetic enjoyment of another." 

He slid his hand away from Kyo's and dragged the covers off of his lover, slowly easing himself over him, only a hint of sexual desire within his movements, most of them born from necessity to move while displaying such raw openness. Kyo let Die shift him, his expression curious, more awake now. He offered a soft sigh at the nuzzling, his hand brushing through Die's hair.

He settled, lying there over Kyo, his hand tracing over his bicep, eyes focused on something beyond the bed. "Agape. Selfless love. Putting another in front of yourself no matter the situation. It is commitment and is utterly unconditional. Love despite everything... through every storm, it will weather."

Die's fingers settled, his thumb still stroking easy circles on his lover's skin. "Pragma. Love of the mind instead of the heart or body. Love that is driven by likeness, by similarity of goals and life paths. Love that is driven forward regardless of emotional circumstance."

He laid his head on Kyo's chest, eyelids finally fluttering closed as he listened to Kyo's heartbeat. "Storge. Love born of friendship. Found from a similarity in passions, by walking the same path and because the things that started your friendship have grown beyond such a simple word and into a need to call it something more."

His fingers twitched and then moved down to grasp Kyo's wrist, holding tight as Die lifted his head and turned the intensity of his gaze upon the other. "Mania. _Need_. Love that is born from that dark pit inside of us, the place that is jealous and possessive. The place that causes us to become codependent upon the one you love. It is carried forward upon every high and every low; it's passionate and overwhelming. Perhaps the one with the most risk and the most terror associated with it."

He slowly released Kyo's wrist from the hard grip, bringing it up and kissing it gently before he released him, though his gaze was no less intent. "I dreamed you forgot about our wedding date. And when I woke, all I could think was of how horrible it would be if that were to be true. Of how I'd feel if you didn't recall and how broken I would be. And this is the first time I've tacked Mania onto that list. Maybe that's a good thing... and maybe it isn't." He gave a light shrug of one shoulder and then rolled off of Kyo, easing back onto the bed and gazing up at the ceiling instead.

Kyo listened to the explanations of the words, a slightly sleepy smile gracing his lips. By the time Die got to Mania, his heart was thumping in his chest though he wasn't sure why. Emotions welling up within him. It took him several moments to realize they were coming from Die. He opened his mouth to respond then shut it again as Die began telling him of his nightmare. His brow furrowed deeply, pain lacing through him, his head shaking side to side. "I would _never_ forget, my darling Die." 

He shifted up as Die moved off him, propping himself up on one arm as he once again cupped Die's face. "You are my world. Even now, even before the official ceremony, I feel as if you will _always_ be my world...but...knowing that in 17 days we will become one in the eyes of the gods...fills my heart to bursting with joy."

A single set of tears tracked down Die's face as Kyo spoke, as the words spilled from his lips. He leaned his head into the touch, eyelids falling closed as two more tears slid downward. Without hesitation, his voice came, bubbling up from inside, a gentle but haunting melody. 

"Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am home again. Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am whole again. Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am young again. Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am fun again. However far away I will always love you. However long I stay, I will always love you. Whatever words I say, I will always love you." He pressed his lips to Kyo's palm and breathed, "I will always love you."

Kyo's chest ached as tears spilled from Die's eyes, his jaw clenching tight to keep his own in check. He shifted again, swiping the tears away then leaning down to press his lips to Die's cheek even as his lover began singing. 

He listened to the words, smiling softly as he pushed his fingers through Die's hair, gazing down at him. "I love you, my Daisuke. This day and the rest of my days. I will always love you."

Die reached up, his hands trembling just the slightest as he grasped Kyo's arms, pulling him down until he could hook him behind the neck, tugging him down and breathing against his lips, "Never leave me... and if I depart this earth before you, never forget me. Be happy and be everything you need to be to survive it, but never forget what I was to you."

Kyo let out a soft, broken sound. "You know damn good and well I'm not going anywhere..." He pressed his lips hard to Die's for a few moments before lifting his head back up, pain crossing his features. "I refuse to believe that we will be apart even for a moment. Not like _that_. "

Die wanted to beg Kyo to be happy after he was gone, to tell him to live his life to the fullest, even if it was without him inside of it. He wanted to push the searing knowledge he gained from that wounded look on Kyo's visage to the back of his mind and forget. But he knew instead what that spoke of, what it meant for after he was gone... and it made him ache with the knowledge of how he'd be if the world claimed Kyo before him. He knew the three paths he could take, saw each of them with a crystal clarity that destroyed him. His heart sent a searing jolt of agony through him, and he bowed his head, his breath hitching as he did his best not to start fully crying. Broken and raw, he managed to choke out, "Make love to me; remind me of everything so vivid and bright."

Kyo stared down at Die for a few moments, tears dripping unbidden from his eyes, not a damn thing he could do stop them. He leaned down, capturing Die's lips, opening the emotional link between the two of them as he did, shuddering at the raw pain he felt from Die. He caressed his cheek then moved down, over his neck, down his chest, over his side and hip before finally resting his hand between his legs. He rubbed gently as he broke the kiss, going to kiss along Die's neck, nipping the skin then soothing with his tongue.

Die lay there. To anyone outside of the pair of them, it would have seemed he was without care over what was happening: that he was, perhaps, bored. But rather, he was giving himself over to the idea of sharing his entire emotional being to Kyo. Every nick and flaw, every bright spot and every soaring moment of joy. He wasn't hard, but that didn't matter at the moment. His body was on fire, and his mind was drifting in much the same way it had the first time Kyo had ever Dominated him in completeness. Blissful and free, even with just the start of the touches from his lover, as though he needed the escape from himself.

Kyo felt the change and rolled with it, shifting over Die and moving down his body, kissing, sucking and biting his skin. He left bruises in his wake, _needing_ the reminder for later when they emerged on the other side of this emotional hurricane. He sucked and bit at Die's nipples, traced his tongue down his chest, left a mark on his nearly too-flat stomach, tongued the dips of his hips. 

The entire time, he held tight to the emotional contact, at times shivering at the intensity of it. When he came to Die's length, he kissed the tip of it through his underwear and pulled away. He removed the underwear, stroking over Die's length before retrieving lube. After slicking up two fingers, he slid his hand between Die's legs, rubbing the pads of his fingers over his entrance.

Die all but floated under Kyo's touches, his mind whirling with the million thoughts and then - just like that - they were gone, leaving him in an abyss of absence. Only Kyo's fingers existed for him, only the slightest temptation to pitch off the other side of this cliff into the vastness of air that existed on the other side. Forever floating free... just to be there, and let this all happen to him in reality while he existed someplace else for a while. But he couldn't let go of the last of it, didn't want to disappoint his lover when he didn't respond. Didn't want him to think this wasn't making love or that this wasn't everything Die needed right then, no matter how his body was or wasn't responding.

Kyo could nearly hear Die's thoughts as though his lover had spoken them aloud. He pressed his fingers against his hole until the muscles gave way for him, his digits sliding in easily. He leaned down to press a kiss to Die's abdomen. 

"Shh, just feel," he murmured as he gently thrust his fingers, working on preparing Die for him.

Die's head lolled and then his eyes closed as he threw himself over the mental ledge. A breath escaped him, reminiscent of a sigh, as he gave in. The other side existed in haze and weightlessness, devoid of anything for the time being, and he could feel everything easing up, every tightly wound coil releasing.

Even as he mentally embraced the void within himself, his body reacted in every way that sang in tune to the sigh of relief he'd voiced. His muscles relaxed around Kyo's fingers, his arms going limp and his jaw slightly slack. And an instant later, his cock was pulsing lightly against his abdomen as stress relieved itself in another way completely, though Die himself made no indications that he'd noticed.

A tiny smile graced Kyo's lips as his lover went completely slack. To an outsider, it would seem as though Die had gone to sleep despite the fingers penetrating him. Kyo knew, though, that his lover was tasting a small piece of nirvana. 

Die's release caught his attention and his smile grew, finding it to be the perfect indication that Die's body was ready for him. He shifted between Die's legs, moving his body into the position he wanted as though he were a ragdoll. Lining himself up, he began pushing into Die, a soft sigh leaving him as he sheathed himself within Die's body. Leaning down, he nuzzled against Die's neck as his hips started rocking in a slow rhythmic way.

Die just floated on that blissful cloud, the one he had tried so hard to obtain in a variety of ways over the years. He'd gone to great lengths to find this place, some of them darker than others, and he'd not once stepped foot into it until he'd been with Kyo. That night that he'd come out the other side of their session realizing a great bit more of how he felt for Kyo and how he needed to deal with himself. 

There was no thought here, no actual process of information. But perhaps it was that little gem that pushed the mind into being able to sort out the truths it needed to on the other side. Perhaps it was his conscious mind taking a rest and his unconscious doing all the required work while he was here. No drug had ever given him that. Not alcohol or pain, not giving in to the horrible urges of his mind and body and certainly not the plethora of lovers he'd had before Kyo. Nothing had ever brought him here _except_ Kyo... and gods that had to mean something, didn't it?

Kyo was only tasting a fraction of Die's feelings now, though, the bliss was nearly overwhelming. His movements increased and then stopped all together as his length pulsed within Die, his release bringing a quiet sigh, a barely there moan spilling from his lips. He didn't withdraw from Die, instead he wrapped himself as well as he could around his lover, positioning himself comfortably without disturbing Die. Once he'd settled, he went slack and let post-orgasmic euphoria trigger his own state of blissful unawareness, joining Die in the haze.

It was near on an hour before Die left that place, before he peeled back the layers of fog that kept him seated in the darkening cradle of those blissful arms. When he did, he drew in the deepest breath, a shudder winding through him, and he felt everything all at once that he'd neglected to feel within the embrace of the void. Arousal slammed hard and hot through him, and he arched beneath Kyo, his cock hardening in a matter of seconds, his breath gasping as he pushed his head back into the pillows. Panting, his hips surged again and again, little desperate cries leaving him as he took hold of every ounce of the physicality at once. Shaking, he nearly screamed out Kyo's name as he came, jerking with every single pulse of the cum leaving his body.

Kyo had slipped far into his own cradle of darkness, nearly actually asleep when Die moved beneath him. He gave a groan then opened his eyes in time to see Die's face twisted in pleasure as the other came near violently. 

He shifted, rocking his hips, moving against Die's body as the other released, giving him that much more contact. "Beautiful," he breathed out, his voice hoarse as though he'd not spoken in years.

Die lay there, panting as he regained awareness of the world around him. His mouth kept opening to give up words or anything other than the gasping rush of breath that happened each time, but none came.

Kyo shifted just enough to capture Die's lips, kissing him deeply, his hand stroking through his mussed up hair.

Die kissed him back reverently before finally tapering it down and pulling back, just reaching to hold the back of his lover's head as he remained there, their foreheads touching. "You gave me that place again... the one I could never find on my own or with anyone or anything in the world but you."

Kyo smiled against Die's lips, humming softly. "I know, I could _feel_ it...I tasted it, tasted your bliss..."

Even in the growing morning light everything fell back into the darkened house of blissful lines for Die. In that moment, he was in the only place he ever wanted to be. Even as he dragged Kyo back down for another kiss, he knew... _knew_ this man was another part of himself, another piece of the puzzle, and one he'd never be able to let go of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing the end!


	91. Chapter 91

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

December the first would have been quite the cold one for both Die and Kyo, had they been within the bounds of Tokyo's city limits. The forecast had heralded snow for the entire week prior, and even as they'd taken off in the plane two days prior, the first flurries had begun to form far up into the clouds. It had been the sort that wouldn't hit the ground, melting far before then, turning to rain. But all the same, it had been somewhat of a relief to Die to get into the air and headed far away from the frozen land of slush Tokyo was about to become.

Seven hours later, they had landed in Hawaii and another three hours had found them away from the airport and transported to the hotel in Honolulu where they were to stay for the next three days before they'd move to another island for their actual honeymoon.

The days had flown by quicker than Die had imagined they could, landing them quickly upon the day he'd found himself looking forward to for what felt like an eternity. The closer and closer to the day they'd gotten, the more and more nervous he'd found himself... and perhaps, the more withdrawn. He worried nearly constantly about screwing something up with the traditional Shinto vows they were going to exchange, something he desperately wanted to do for Kyo. It had grown bad enough he found himself in the bathroom, nearly hyperventilating at times, and he'd made liberal use of his anti-anxiety medication since they'd been here.

But today he'd foregone it, not wanting to have a single thing in his system. No alcohol, no tobacco, no nicotine, no caffeine, and no medication. Instead, he'd meditated three times already, and he found himself standing in the waiting room of the Dazaifu Tenmangu shrine, his palms sweaty and his heart racing. Both he and Kyo were clad in the traditional wedding garb, and he kept fighting himself to not be overly nauseated, the urge to turn to some horrible habits having surfaced in the past two days. He knew he only had a few more hours before the urge would fly away, where he'd be more comfortable that he wouldn't be fucking up everything by waging some mistake with this ceremony, but for now he was utterly on edge.

He stood across from his parents and his brother, hands shaking, and his muscles trembling beneath his clothing. For all that he wanted this to be perfect, he felt nothing but fear, though it was only fear of messing it up, not the usual fear he was sure most people would have felt standing here. He just hoped no one was taking it for the wrong sort, that no one would question him as to if he wanted to go through with this. Because he was nearly certain if someone questioned his desire to marry Kyo while he was this pent up, he might just up and pop them in the face before even thinking about it.

The days, weeks, months had flown by in a blur for Kyo. One moment they were planning their wedding and the next they were there, in Hawaii, at the shrine. Over the course of the last few weeks, Kyo had become more and more anxious. Even his recent on-stage antics had done little to quell the storm within. Die wasn't the only one tempted to return to former bad habits, and his legs bore the evidence of his state of mind at that moment. 

Now, he stood next to his own family, in his kimono, his throat so tight he could barely speak. The procession was about to start and soon he and Die would walk up to the shrine, side by side, led by the head priest. He swallowed thickly, glancing at his mother who offered him a warm, knowing smile. Pushing out a breath, he turned and moved into his place in the procession, waiting for Die to join him at his side.

Die listened once more to the quiet voice of one of the maidens as she patiently told him once more what he was to do throughout the ceremony. He'd been over it tons of times before arriving, but had also been told three times now what to do and what not to do. That didn't help him all that much, though; it was just something he was going to fear until it was over and done with - preferably without any messes.

He took a deep breath and nodded to her. She gently led him to his place in the procession, and his family fell into line behind him, his brother squeezing his arm before passing him by to go and stand where he was supposed to be. He offered a nervous smile to Kyo and then chose to stare at his feet for the moment, urging himself to breathe normally as they were instructed to start out.

Kyo glanced over at Die, his heart surging with affection and love. He reached over and briefly grasped the other's hand before the priest came up and began to lead them into the shrine. He had to watch his feet to make sure he didn't stumble, feeling rather unsteady at the moment. When they entered the shrine, he could feel the peace trying to penetrate his nerves, and he did his best to open up and let it, if only to experience half a moment of calm.

The closer they got to the shrine, the more certain Die was that he was going to lose it. His nerves felt like they were on a keychain a toddler insisted upon jangling wildly back and forth. And his stomach felt like he'd just gone five rounds with a roller coaster. He forced another swallow down and managed to subtly take a single mint from inside the ring he had on his hand and slip it into his mouth, pushing it under his tongue and sending up a silent prayer for it to work magic on his stomach, if only for a small period of time.

Kyo glanced over at Die once more before finally going to his knees, taking a breath. They would be purified first and then their families. The priest recited the lines then began, starting with Die first. He focused on the words, trying to let his spiritual energies come into play during this, rather than the overwhelming urge to scream. A glance at Die's pale face told him his lover was having similar issues. It would be over before they knew it though.

Die's heart beat like crazy as they moved into the actual ceremony. His hands would have been shaking like crazy if he didn't have them pressed to his sides like he'd come unhinged if he lifted them away from his body. He did his best to have a neutral look on his face, but instead it came across as the same look he gave the camera on most occasions when they were doing photoshoots. Maybe, just maybe, no one would notice.

The priest carried on, purifying Kyo next and then their families as a whole. After it was finished, they all stood and bowed deeply, Kyo feeling as though he might fall over after doing so. 

They settled again, and the priest stood before them and announced their marriage to the altar, the whole wedding party once more standing and bowing. Then the priest began the prayer, and Kyo re-settled, finally reaching over to brush his fingers against Die's hand.

Die barely managed to keep himself glued together during the whole announcement: nerves threatening tears, and tears threatening his ability to get anywhere else with this whole thing. But he somehow managed to keep his mask in place, though he looked like a man very much about to lose his battle with his nerves and possibly his stomach.

The touch of Kyo's hand was like a balm to his soul, a gentle prod to his nerves to tell them to stop. He peered discretely over at Kyo and took another shaky breath, repeating to himself in his head that the next step in the process was the sake drinking part. _Don't drink, don't drink, drink. Don't drink, don't drink, drink._

After the prayer was finished, the shrine maidens prepared the sake cups. Kyo was to go first, and so he reached for the smallest first, bringing it up to his lips. He very nearly actually sipped it but remembered and only let the liquid touch his lips. Settling the cup down he proceeded to the next before finally reaching the third and taking the drink he was supposed. After that, he settled the cup and turned to peer at Die, not realizing that he was shaking.

Die was too nervous to actually see what was happening with Kyo. He only knew that once Kyo had settled the third cup, he needed to pick up the first one. He repeated the mantra to himself as he went down the line of cups, ensuring not to drink at all from the first two and to only sip from the third, though he wanted to down the whole thing out of nothing else but nerves.

Once he settled the third cup down, he came to place beside Kyo and together, they proceeded up to the altar. Die let himself reach to lightly graze his fingers over Kyo's own before gluing his hands back to his sides and doing his best to look normal again.

After they'd proceeded to the altar, Kyo glanced down at Die's fleeting touch. He reached over and grasped the other's hand firmly before taking the scroll with the vow on it from the priest. Clearing his throat, he began reading loudly and clearly, words speaking of loyalty and protection, decency and eternal love spilling from his lips almost as though he were singing them.

Die knew he shouldn't simply stand there, his eyes closed, and his hand clutching at Kyo's own. But he'd be damned if he could possibly have done anything else. Listening to the sound of Kyo's voice, the way he lulled him into a place filled with all the things that he needed, there wasn't a single thing he could have done other than that. Slowly, his trembling eased, his world coming into brighter focus, and his goal of knowing his lover was with him through it all pulling him from the place that made him want to sob until his insides found the outside. And so, for a while, he existed in a place where only Kyo's words existed, where only the sound of his lover's voice could touch him, and where his only anchor was the hand gripping his own.

Kyo got the end of the vows, essentially promising to the gods to forever love and protect Die, and it was then that his voice wavered and cracked. He clenched his teeth hard, his grip on Die's hand tightening harshly as he brought himself back under control. And then, the shrine maiden was handing them each a branch of a sacred tree to offer to the gods. The ceremony was very close to its end.

Die reached for his own branch, releasing Kyo's hand to hold onto it with both hands after a brief squeeze to his lover's hand. He blinked a few times to acclimate to having his eyes open, trying not to look too much like he'd zoned into his happy place while Kyo had been reciting.

Kyo smiled softly then stepped up to the altar, placing the branch upon then waiting on Die to set his down. In unison, they bowed twice and clapped twice, Kyo mentally thanking the gods for the favor as they did.

Die completed the rest of the ceremony without managing to fuck anything up at all, much to his relief. Once they clapped twice, he actually seemed to deflate, breathing out the softest of sighs. He reached for Kyo's hand again, his fingers just brushing against Kyo's, an invite, but nothing more for the time being.

Kyo immediately reached for Die's hand, linking their fingers and squeezing hard. The shrine maidens passed out sake to their families as they stood there. They drank and then the ceremony was over, and in the eyes of the Shinto gods, he and Die were married.

Die still didn't dare to talk, not one hundred percent certain that they were entirely done with the ceremony. Instead, he still stood there, one hand clenched in his garments, the other clinging to Kyo's hand. 

The priest announced the end of the ceremony then came to congratulate them both. Kyo bowed deeply again, thanking him in the most formal way he knew how. After that, he turned to Die, waiting for his lover.

Die followed suit, bowing as well and then pulled Kyo to his side, wrapping an arm around his waist as he breathed out, "Did I do it all okay?"

Kyo quietly lead Die into an antechamber for wrapping his arms tightly around him. "Perfectly, my love."

Die gathered him into his arms and pushed his face against his neck, closing his eyes and letting out a shaky little sigh. "I'm glad," he murmured, his hands gently holding onto Kyo's back.

Kyo gave Die's hair a gentle stroke, not wanting to muss it up too badly. "Me, too." He pressed a kiss to Die's cheek then pulled back to look into his eyes. " _My_ koi."

Die peered into Kyo's eyes for a moment and then grabbed hold of him, leaning down and pressing his lips to Kyo's own. The kiss was passionate, but somehow still chaste.

Kyo sighed against the kiss, returning it fully, his hands going to cover Die's. Happiness well up inside him like a spring and promptly spilled from his eyes, tears tracking down his cheeks.

Die cupped Kyo's face in his hands, kissing him gently for a few more moments. He pulled back just enough to gently thumb away the tears from his lover's cheeks. "You are my everything..."

Kyo smiled softly, blinking away the rest of the tears. "And you are my everything. I love you, Daisuke."

"Tooru," Die murmured, leaning in to kiss him once again, his touch ever so gentle.

Kyo couldn't help but keep smiling, even as they kissed again, his heart fluttering with joy.


	92. Chapter 92

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta: thehamhamheaven

Die stood in the small dressing room inside of the facility he'd rented out for their less traditional ceremony. He reached to adjust his red vest for the hundredth time, his breath hitching as he glanced in the mirror at his brother, Kenta. "Do me a solid, will ya?"

Kenta glanced over at him and slid his arms to cross loosely over his chest. "Mmhmm?"

Licking his lips, Die glanced toward the small square tumbler on the table to his left. "Jameson please? Three fingers, straight up."

"Die... I don't think that's a good idea, you know? I mean, you want to be sober for the ceremony at least, right?"

Die breathed out a soft sigh, turning to face his brother, chewing his lip and then finally, releasing it. "I'm going to be blunt here, okay?" He sighed as he leaned on the counter, pulling himself up to sit on the edge. "Alcoholic here... and I've been sober since halfway through yesterday. If I don't get something in there, we're going to have a bigger issue in the form of withdrawal about halfway through the ceremony. I've been shaking since this morning." He held up his hands, the faint tremor there as he tried to hold then steady. "It's not for lack of trying to stop. I'm doing far less than before. But this life... it's difficult." He sighed and then shrugged as he slid back off the counter. Sniffing, he licked his lips and tilted his head back. "Just do me this favor..."

Kenta sighed, shifting his stance and then heading toward the door. "Do our parents know?"

"Of course not... that's about the last thing they need to be worrying about." Die turned around and moved to button the cuffs of his shirt, pulling down the suit jacket over them.

Kenta shook his head a little, trailing out of the room, leaving Die alone for the time being. He pulled a card from his pocket, murmuring words to himself from the card, smiling a little once he was done and tucking it back into his pocket. It was only a backup, in case he froze. He'd memorized the words months and months ago, edited them until he was blue in the face.

His brother returned shortly, holding a tumbler out to him with a little frown. "Three fingers, and no more until after the ceremony, okay?"

"It'll be enough, just trust me." Die grasped the glass, slammed it back in one go, and then put the glass on the table. He cleared his throat, checking his watch. "See if we're ready to go over in Kyo's room?"

Kenta patted him on the shoulder and nodded, heading out the door and toward Kyo's room.

Kyo had just finished sliding his jacket on and was standing in front of the mirror, checking and re-checking his appearance when he heard a soft tap on the door. "Come in," he called, adjusting his jewelry and then smoothing his hair down.

Kenta stepped into the room, a soft smile on his lips as he pushed the door closed behind him. "Your husband is ready to start if you are." He took in Kyo's outfit and then grinned. "Hey... I recognize the suits now. From the engagement thing Die sprung on you a while back, right?"

Kyo turned to peer at Kenta, a smile springing to his lips at the word "husband". He nodded, bringing his hands together and clasping them tightly for a moment before he turned to drink down the rest of his herbal tea. "Yeah, they're the same...we thought they were fitting." 

He settled the tea cup down then stepped over to the door, his face a mask of calm, hiding the utter turmoil inside. It was now his turn to be nervous. "I'm ready..."

"Go to the left door and wait on the second song to start. Die will meet you in the center, and you'll go down the aisle together. I didn't tell you about the two songs, or he'll kill me, but it's easier than telling you something like twelfth measure and third verse or something." 

Kyo blinked at Kenta's instructions then huffed out a soft laugh. "Die has this planned down the measures in the songs?"

"Die has this planned to a point that you'd not believe. Or maybe you would... but god, he's driving us all crazy with the meticulous planning." Kenta grinned. "Ever heard of the show Bridezilla? The nice ones who are still a bit overbearing about being exact... that's him. Only groom version." Kenta grinned at Kyo and then opened the door. "You'll do fine, you know."

Kyo shook his head then offered his now brother-in-law a genuine smile. "Thank you." With that, he stepped out and headed for the area he was supposed to be in, standing behind the door and waiting for the music to start, a nervous shiver going up his spine.

 

Kenta waited on Kyo to pass and then watched Kyo head off, padding back to Die. He opened the door, finding Die waiting calmly in front of the mirror, his hands clasped behind his back, a ring halfway on his index finger. "It's time. Kyo's headed to position. I'll go start the music, get to yours."

Die took in a deep breath and then nodded, heading out of the room toward the right. He grinned as he walked, already feeling much more in his own element here.

The song started up a few moments later, and Die could hear the rest of the wedding party as they lined up. He stepped to the side to watch them pair up and start down the aisle, a small smile on his lips as he watched his mother and Kyo's mother pair up, their fathers, and then Kyo's sister and Kenta. As they disappeared down the aisle, he stepped back to his door and began to count the measures from that point forward.

Kyo listened to the music carefully, hearing the song wind down and then come to an end. He swallowed hard and waited for the second to start, his hand reaching for the door handle. As soon as the guitars started in on a familiar melody, his heart stuttered then jumped to his throat, threatening to choke him. He had to bite his lip hard to keep his emotions in check as he opened the door and stepped out, walking towards the center to meet Die there.

Die opened his door as well, a brilliant grin on his lips that he couldn't keep back no matter how hard he tried. There would be nothing solemn about this procession. He took the seven strides down the back of the row of chairs and then came to stand at the back, center, waiting on Kyo. He held out his arm so Kyo could take his elbow and waited on it to happen.

Die's smile proved infectious, causing Kyo's lips to turn upward as he met the other in the middle. He reached out and took Die's elbow, grasping tightly. "Ready?" he murmured quietly, trying not to look at the rows of people in front of them.

Die turned to face down the aisle. "I've been ready for a long time, darling." He raised his chin a little and kept that grin in place as he headed toward the raised platform at the front.

Kyo couldn't help but continue smiling as they walked, though his hand was tight on Die's arm. When they reached the platform, he released Die and moved into place, focusing completely on his husband.

Die took his place on the side containing his family. He flicked a glance at the man he'd chosen to do their ceremony. The guy wasn't of any particular faith, and he had no problem going forward with marrying anyone who wanted to be. Die had interviewed nearly a dozen people before deciding this guy was the one for the job. And then he'd practiced lines with him over Skype for hours while Kyo had been with Sukekiyo over the past few months. 

The man held no Bible, nothing to read from. He was dressed in more traditional Japanese wedding apparel than Kyo and Die were, and when the music cut, his silky smooth voice filled the room easily. 

"Friends, family... today we come together in celebration. Some of you may know that earlier this morning our two guests of utmost honor tied the knot in a ceremony at the shrine. For those that did not know... surprise!" He offered a smile to the audience and then continued. "We are here in what has to be the fastest renewal of vows I have ever witnessed in my twenty years officiating ceremonies. And, truly, I am impressed at the love it must take to wish to do this so quickly."

Die pursed his lips a little and ducked his head at that, obviously a little bit embarrassed, but happily so. He met Kyo's eyes again as he raised his head, the huge, genuine smile returning to his lips.

Kyo glanced at the officiant and then Die, his lips quirked up a bit as the man began to speak. The man's quips pulled a quiet rumble of laughter from the audience, and even Kyo had a bit of a hard time not chuckling. He just shook his head, grinning at Die, grinning at the obvious meticulous planning, the months spent refining every detail. He took in a breath and pushed it out, adoration crossing his features at the sheer lengths Die went to making this perfect.

The guy spread his hands, palms upward, and offered his words once again. "There are traditionally offered vows for any type of wedding ceremony. But after long deliberation – and trust me, it was at greater length than any of you would think Die here to be capable of – it was decided that none of them were worth their salt in comparison to the way Die feels about Kyo." He gave ample pause for the smattering of pleased sounds from the audience, his gaze landing on Kyo for a moment.

Kyo glanced at the officiant and then to Die, his eyes widening slightly. He had known that there would be vows; he had his own words to say, though he'd kept them simple as he'd already read the Shinto vows. But now, he wondered just how inadequate his own would be in comparison to whatever it was that Die had planned.

Continuing, the man's voice was crystal clear to the room awaiting him. "There were words by Eliza Acton. ‘I love thee as I love the tone of some soft-breathing flute. Whose soul is waked for me alone, when all beside is mute’... but it was kindly pointed out that flute is not the instrument of choice for either of these fine gentlemen." He flashed a smile and Die had to grin, his tongue flicking out along his lower lip as his cheeks flushed further.

Kyo huffed out a soft breath, barely a laugh but amusement danced in his eyes. He would forever be grateful Die took the time to choose the right person for this, the choice obviously a good one. Kyo was almost feeling at ease as he stood in front of his family and friends.

"The suggestion was made for Alighieri, a seven hundred year old poem of love and rebirth. ‘In that book which is my memory, on the first page, that is the chapter when I first met you, appear the words... here begins a new life.’ And while that would seem fitting, a new beginning with Kyo in his life, Die found that the words didn't quite ring as true as he would have liked. He told me of years spent with Kyo before they became a couple, of years wherein he was his close friend, his anchor in storms, and his bandmate. And, perhaps, the words rang true to a place somewhere in the distant past, at the beginning of their path together. But it wasn't this path, was not the one that led them here today. And so, those words, too, were cast aside as not quite what they needed to be."

He lowered his hands, reaching instead to clasp them behind his back, similar to how Die was standing for the time being, emulating his actions as he was his mouthpiece for the time being. "Perhaps closer to the things Die wanted to say were the words by David Kelly. Words found in desperate searching of a hundred love poems late one night, with Kyo due to come back home at any minute." He gave pause and then closed his eyes, reciting quietly, "‘A gentle word like a spark of light illuminates my soul. And as each sound goes deeper, it's you that makes me whole. There is no corner, no dark place, your love cannot fill. And if the world starts causing waves, it's your devotion that makes them still’." He opened his eyes and shared a wide grin with the audience. "But see... the poem just doesn't go on far enough, deep enough... and it ends in _wife_ , which Die was wholly against referring to Kyo as." Die gave a little huff of a laugh.

Kyo listened to the man speak, soft words touching his heart but then being declared not enough. It rang true to his own thoughts. No words would ever be enough. The words didn't exist in this world to tell Die how much he meant.

"It took the longest time before I realized that, in Die's heart, in his world-view with Kyo within it, no words would find themselves worthy of this moment, this union of souls. Once I found my peace with that, I found my own way to try to express what Die was doing his best to show me existed between them." He reached to touch Die's shoulder, squeezing it lightly, taking care not to do the same to Kyo, a clear message that he had been told Kyo didn't like to be touched by strangers. He, instead, offered a nod toward Kyo and a soft smile. "I found the words that came closest without skipping away from the true point Die wanted to make here today." Another pause, just to give point that he was moving on to the actual words and then returned his stance to emulate Die's own.

"‘A special world for you and me, a special bond one cannot see. It wraps us up in its cocoon and holds us fiercely in its womb. Its fingers spread like fine spun gold, gently nestling us to the fold. Like silken thread it holds us fast, bonds like this are meant to last. And though at times a thread may break, a new one forms in its wake. To bind us closer and keep us strong, in a special world, where we belong’."

Kyo listened, his heart thumping hard in his chest as the official spoke. The very way he spoke of Die's wishes told Kyo that many hours had been spent on just this simple thing alone and another surge of emotion welled up within him. 

By the time the poem came to an end, Kyo's jaw was clenched tight to prevent himself from sobbing aloud.

Die stepped toward Kyo then, his hand coming out to lightly touch Kyo's fingertips, not taking his hand, but instead drawing a faint line over his ring finger. "The hardest thing about planning any of this was finding the words I wanted to live on forever in our hearts. Nothing was good enough for the man that has not only claimed my heart, but has thrown me rope when I'm too far down the well... tossed me a lift raft when I was drowning in a sea of my own emotional turmoil... for the man I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with." He finally hooked his index finger around Kyo's own, just holding it lightly. 

"I've gone over my words a hundred times and even now, standing here, I think to myself that they still will not cover everything I want them to. There's not a way in the world I could ever bring forth such a thing, no matter the language I speak the words in, no matter the length of time I spend looking for them or reciting them. And it comes down to the fact that it's because I never want to stop saying the words that speak of how much you mean to me. From here... this point forward... the words I speak in those private moments are the ones I want to express to you. Every day of my life will be spent expressing the words that one moment could never have done justice to." 

He finally caught Kyo's hand entirely, lifting it to his lips and pressing a kiss tenderly to his knuckles. "These words I speak, these following ones, they are not for the guests in this room; they are not for the man I chose to stand before us in this moment. They are only for you, my love." Stepping in closer, Die cupped Kyo's cheek and leaned down to breathe his words into Kyo's ear. 

"For the rest of my life, I want to find every way to tell you – to show you – what you mean to me. I want every action to speak these words for me. I want to kiss that spot between your brows, to kiss away every ounce of anxiety written there. I want to find each piercing mark and scar and brush my lips over them," he moved his thumb to play over the one below Kyo's lip. "And I want to find every beauty mark, and let my tongue linger there just to see if the taste will change over the years." He took another step closer to Kyo, bringing them intimately close to one another.

"I want to breathe your air and taste you without my mouth ever having touched... I want to worship you in a thousand ways and know every moment it will not be enough. I want to find every way I can to tell you what you mean to me." He lifted Kyo's hand and pressed a small kiss to his wrist before sliding his hand into Kyo's hair and pressing his lips back to his ear. "I want to taste the inside of your wrist and find those age-old scars, and I want to comfort every ancient pain with just the basis of my emotion." His thumb swiped over the tattoo on Kyo's neck. "I want to follow the path of every tattoo you've placed upon your flesh, and I want to show you everything I see and everything I love simply so you can enjoy it with me. I want to know all of your passions and all of your hatreds, and I want to spend those moments just holding you when we're alone and knowing that we're there for one another. But most of all, I want you to understand how I feel every single day of my life with you. And it's my pledge to you that I will do my very best to show you, to tell you, everything I love about you."

Cupping Kyo's cheek again, he shifted Kyo so that he could lean in and press a tender kiss to his lips.

Kyo stood there, letting Die speak, his heart flopping as the other declared his words to be too private for the audience. Then the words started, and there was nothing in this world that could stop the hot tears from dripping down his face. By the time Die was kissing him, his body was trembling with silent sobs. He clung to Die, returning the kiss, unable to get a hold of himself in the least.

Die tucked Kyo's face against his shoulder and held him there, pressing kiss after kiss to his temple. There was a hitch in his own breath, near to tears, but not there just yet. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Kyo's ear again and breathed out, "I will fuck you stupid later, baby doll... but right now, we've gotta finish this." He knew the words would probably inspire Kyo to stop crying into his shoulder, crude as they were, and he also knew no one else could hear them but Kyo, so it wouldn't matter later that he'd said them in the middle of an elegant ceremony.

Kyo hiccupped, nearly choked on a half sob and half laugh at Die's crude but effective words. He finally pulled back enough to accept the discretely offered tissue from the man conducting the ceremony, wiping his face up quickly before looking up at Die's face. "I...I also have searched for the correct words to say in this moment. The words that would tell those present just how very much you mean to me, to tell them how you've saved me time and again from myself. But, I have failed in my task. Because there simply are none." 

He stepped back into Die's arms, reaching up and cupping his face, peering into his eyes. He opened their mental link and pushed out everything he was feeling. No, he didn't have the words but he had the emotions and the memories. Like a slideshow in his mind, he went over some of their happiest moments together as a couple and some of their darkest from the early days. Times where Die saved him, pivotal moments that lead Kyo to realize his feelings, and finally to that morning when they'd been joined at the shrine. Every ounce of love and happiness Die had brought him, he pushed out them for Die to see and feel, his body trembling as he did. He knew their audience would be utterly confused at they stood there like this, but it was the only way he knew how to "say" what he wanted.

Die let himself feel what Kyo was trying to send to him, his face slowly dissolving into one that spoke of love and adoration, but of the exquisite pain that painted some of those moments as well. Tears slowly slid down his cheeks, but his lips pulled into a smile brighter than any of the others he'd shown today. "I love you forever," Die whispered quietly.

Kyo disengaged and looked up at Die, peering into his eyes. "Forever and beyond," he murmured, his hands going to grasp Die's, squeezing hard.

The officiant flicked a glance to the side, and Kenta discretely pushed a button, soft violin and piano music filling the room. "It is with deepest pleasure that I rejoin the hands of these two men tonight."

Die stepped back and took Kyo's hand in his own, turning their hands palm upward as he met Kyo's eyes and held them. 

"With this length of cord comes symbolism, comes eternity. There is a great story of the bond one can find within the other end of their red string." He wrapped it over Kyo's pinky and then strung it to Die's own, wrapping it there as well. "In all of my years I have never spoken to just one half of a union and found that I felt as though I knew the other already through that alone. But with Die and Kyo, I have. And I find the man before me to be very much the one that Die described to me." He placed a silver silken cloth over the top of their hands and held out his own over theirs. 

Die placed Kyo's ring on his palm, the wedding ring rather than the engagement one, his eyes never leaving Kyo's own.

Kyo flushed a bit at the thought of just how much Die had spoken about him to this man before them. A man he had not met until today. He swallowed and placed Die's ring into the officiant's palm, his eyes holding Die's gaze, even as he chewed his bottom lip.

There was a moment in which the rings were simply held and then his palm was turned over, the rings pressed against the silken cloth. "I have the greatest honor of joining you as one here today. A unit of love and livelihood, a unit of profound emotion and attachment. And with the powers of legality I hold upon this Earth, I humbly offer to those of you in attendance today," he pulled the cloth away swiftly, the rings gone from the top of the cloth, the cord gone from under it, and both rings in place on the proper fingers, "the Niimura-Andou union."

Die stepped forward as those in attendance rose and began to clap for them. He brought his hand to Kyo's cheek and cupped it so gently as he pressed his lips to Kyo's own, kissing him deeply, uncaring of their audience for the moment.

Kyo felt the ring slide into place on his finger and heard the announcement of their union, and he felt as though he would burst. He leaned into Die's touch, kissing him back hard and passionately, baring more than he ever had in front of so many people. When he pulled away, his eyes were shining, and his lips were spread in a wide smile.

Die grinned at Kyo, taking his hand and turning toward those with them today. He took the step down, and the music swelled upward. The pair of them walked down the aisle and at the midpoint, there was a tiny pop and fake snow began to drift down over them and the aisle as they walked. He breathed out, "It just wasn't December without a little snow, you know?"

Kyo blinked at the snow then huffed out a laugh. "You...are something else, you know that?"

Die didn't bother to bite back his smile as he proceeded to a bunch of clapping and calls of joy from the gathered crowd. They exited through the main middle doors, and Die grabbed Kyo's hand, whispering, "Trust me," as he began to run, hauling Kyo after him.

Kyo smiled and offered little nods to the crowd as they headed for the exit. When they reached it, Die grasped his hand and began running, causing him to have to do so as well or risk falling. "Die....what"

They rounded several corners, and Die skidded to a halt, opening a door and pulling Kyo inside. He shut and locked the door and then turned Kyo around to face the rest of the room. It was a small office, and on the desk sat a bottle of Jameson and their crystal tumblers from their engagement party. A single origami heart lay on the table for each and every year they'd been a couple, marked with the years on each one. 

Die lead Kyo to the table and picked up the bottle, opening it and pouring a tiny bit in each glass. "This is where I get to be the biggest sap on the planet. You know all those times I can't quite get the romance right? Like I'm trying too hard?" Die gave Kyo a little smile. "See... it's because I overthink everything when it comes to you. I love you so much it's hard to see beyond the swell you put in my chest every time I look at you or think about you. But this one time... this single time in our lives, I've got it all done the way I always see it in my head, Koi." He used the affectionate term Kyo always used for him on purpose in this single instance, wanting it to stand out among everything else he ever told him. "This one day, nothing can go wrong. Do you know why that is?"

Kyo followed Die into the office then stopped short, his heart giving a stutter. He stepped closer to the table, peering at the hearts. "Oh Die...." he murmured quietly. When Die started speaking, his heart clenched and he had to swallow several times to control himself.

Die reached out, trailing his fingers over Kyo's cheek, the light in his eyes unmistakable in that moment. "Because nothing will ever be anything but perfect with you. Every up and every down, every corner we take and every wrong turn or correct path... we'll have each other. And that's the _only_ thing in the entire world that matters to me." Leaning in, he let his lips linger against Kyo's own, not so much kissing him as breathing his air, letting himself feel connected... and simply _living_.

Kyo swallowed hard again, tears leaking from the corners of his eyes. "My dear, sweet Koi. You are my everything...and always will be," he murmured softly, his hand coming up stroke Die's cheek.

Die let Kyo speak against his lips, kissing him once he was done, letting the instant embody his passion, his love, his life. When he pulled back, he offered a grin to his lover, holding out his arm, hand holding the tumbler. "Do me a solid here, and link arms with me, and be all cheesy, and let's do the drinking from the other's glass thing. You know... so we avoid doing this in public. You're welcome, by the way," he teased softly.

Kyo returned the kiss, a sigh escaping through his nose. He took the offered tumbler and smiled softly, happiness welling up more inside him, threatening to choke him. "Thank you, my sweet darling....you've thought of everything."

Die handed Kyo one of the glasses. "I try," Die murmured quietly as he twined his arm with Kyo's own and moved to take a sip from his glass, letting the whiskey sit in his mouth for a moment before he swallowed it down. 

Unlinking their arms, he pulled himself up on the edge of the desk and picked up the paper hearts, holding them out. "Don't open them now. I want you to save them and open them on bad days. If you're having a shit day and I'm not there or if we're having a shit day, then we can open one and share it. Whatever it is. These are some of our reminders, our notes to the future and to remind us of everything... of why we are what we are together." 

Kyo took his own sip, swallowing the amber liquid then sighing as it burned his throat on the way down. He then turned and peered at the hearts, his own giving a hard thump as he listened to Die's explanation. A soft, genuine smile crossed his lips. "I can't wait for my first bad day just so I can see what they say." 

Picking up the bottle of Jameson, Die poured his glass halfway full and took another swallow. "I promise you I won't get drunk tonight, just buzzed, and I promise you the wine on our table at the reception is non-alcoholic, and I'm the only person who knows that besides you."

Stepping over to Die, Kyo leaned in to kiss his cheek before grasping the bottle himself, sipping directly from it. "Thank you, love. I don't know how this was supposed flow; but even if it didn't stick to your plans, it's beautiful, and my heart has never felt so much joy."

"So far, it's been exactly what it's supposed to be." Die reached to rub over Kyo's wrist, watching him quietly for a moment before squeezing lightly. He tugged Kyo between his spread legs and slid his arms around his waist, just holding on lightly. "You know... sometimes it's nice when I'm not just trying to get in your pants every second of the day." He offered a lopsided grin. "Moments like these are stunning to me, and I love every second of them."

Kyo spurt out a laugh and leaned in, pressing his face against Die's neck, kissing lightly. "I agree fully," he whispered against Die's skin.

Die shifted enough to take a big swallow of the liquid from his tumbler, putting the glass down as he reached up to run his hand through Kyo's hair. "Reception in ten, love." It was a tender indication toward the fact that they didn't have time for the things Kyo was making him think of right then, and that, for once, Die wasn't interested in the quick version of the whole thing.

Kyo nodded, leaning up to simply kiss Die in a soft, sweet way, his hand stroking all over his back. "Too bad, I would rather spend the rest of the day alone with you."

Die kissed him back for that brief moment and when the words came, he took in a hitched breath, running his tongue over his teeth and then moved to drink the rest of his glass of Jameson. He did it slow, thinking his way through what he wanted to do versus what he thought would make Kyo happier in the long run and what would make everyone else happier. Taking the final swallow of the whiskey, he settled the tumbler on the desk, poured himself another two fingers worth and put the bottle back down.

Hesitating for a moment, he picked up the glass and slammed back the contents before quietly offering, "We can skip out. Go find something to do." Sliding the glass onto the table, he picked up the lid of the bottle and screwed it back on, reaching for Kyo's glass and finishing off the amber liquid before gently stacking it with his own.

Kyo watched Die drink the whiskey, a small frown working its way to his face. He shook his head, reaching up to fix a piece of Die's hair. "Sweetheart, I didn't mean that seriously....I would never skip out on all of the work you've put into this..." He offered a smile, cupping Die's cheek. "Besides, I believe there was something about cake....and well, I didn't eat breakfast you know."

Die huffed out a little laugh and reached for Kyo's hand, taking it and kissing the palm of it lightly before pressing it against his cheek and leaning into it. Closing his eyes, he murmured, "You know... I'd do anything for you."

Kyo smiled, stepping closer to Die again, kissing his lips. "I love you, with all of my heart, Daisuke."

Die let a smile light his face again and he breathed out a soft, "I love you, too, darling. I love you with every fiber of my being." He moved then, sliding down from the desk and linking hands with Kyo and pulling him toward the door. "You know I'm not letting go of you for nearly anything, right? Just so we're clear?"

Kyo grinned widely, squeezing Die's hand tightly as they moved towards the door. "Gods I hope not." He stopped once they got to the door, leaning up to steal one more private kiss. "Now, let's go present ourselves as...well husband and husband."

Die leaned to peck his nose lightly before opening the door and leading Kyo through it, pulling it shut behind them. They padded down the hallway, humming softly to himself as they moved along. 

Opening the door to the reception room, he paused for a second to let Kyo take it in. Kyo padded with Die down the hall then stood aside as he opened the door. He took in a breath and looked around their perfectly set up reception, emotion welling up inside him with the beauty of it all. 

It was everything they'd discussed, the black tablecloths with red runners toward every seating, the tables round, with multiple guests at each one. The center pieces were simple votives, one larger one with a red rose floating in clear gel in each and four smaller candles around it, each one flickering in the dimmed lights of the room. The lights above were long panels of looped crystals, each with tiny LEDs reflecting off of them from above. Silver rose petals scattered over the tables and the backs of every chair were draped with little tiny strands of star lights, each with their own battery pack. 

The notes on the tables told guests to please take home whichever thing they wanted, the lights or the floating roses or votives as a momento, Die knowing well that people would take a few anyway and wanting to just ease their conscience of it all by giving it to them.

The whole thing, while gorgeous, was also clearly not over the top budget-wise. A buffet was set up along the back wall, with a delicate looking fish dish and rice on one portion and a station to cook your own meat, with a variety of it to offer on the other side. In between lay a spread of vegetables and fruit and absolutely no sign of any of it being canned. The other side of the room held a large quantity of sodas and juices and about twenty bottles of various types of alcohol, but there was no sign of a bar tender. 

The cake sat beside the single table that held only two chairs, smaller and closer to the dance floor. The cake itself was a five tier round construction of delicate white icing and beautiful branches of brown icing up the side, red and silver sakura blossoms decorating the cake and real ones filling the square pedestal beneath the cake. Kyo gazed fondly at their cake for a moment before sweeping his eyes over the people in attendance. 

The room itself was filed with only eighteen people, plus two staff members who would help clean everything up. It was, perhaps, overkill in the food department for so few people, but the count of people to tables was exact, Die finding himself proud he'd somehow managed such a thing.

Kyo swallowed his nerves and grasped Die's hand, ready to walk into the banquet hall with him. "Wow," he whispered softly, unable to come up with any other words at the moment.

Die squeezed Kyo's hand as he maneuvered them inside and toward their table. He pulled out both of their chairs and settled into his, still holding onto Kyo's hand like he'd become glued to it. "Boss offered to get our food for us if you'd like, or we can get our own; I only need to tell him when he shows up over here in a few minutes."

Kyo settled into his chair, experiencing a small moment of panic as everyone turned to watch them. He squeezed Die's hand harder for a few seconds then relaxed, offering a small smile. "I will be glad to let Boss fetch for us..."

"Fish or other meat or just whatever his whim is?" Die gave a little wave when his mother gave him an excited – if not slightly watery – wave toward him. He shifted his chair closer and reached for the bottle of non-alcoholic wine on their table, the label neatly missing from the bottle. He opened it one-handed and poured some for both Kyo and himself before gently leaning against his lover's shoulder.

Kyo waved to Die's mother, now his mother-in-law, as well then leaned his head against Die's for a moment. "I think, right now, I'd like to start with the wagyu."

"Good, me, too." Die nuzzled himself into Kyo's hair for a moment, just closing his eyes and breathing in Kyo's scent for the moment, a sense of calm settling over him. "This feels like freedom."

Kyo turned to press a kiss to the top of Die's head then smiled. "It _is_ freedom, my love." 

He sat back up when he heard someone approaching, Boss's boots clicking on the floor. He offered the other a smile before looking out over the crowd, their guests chatting amongst themselves. He saw his father and Die's father chatting animatedly together, the two looking as if they were the best of friends, something he was extremely grateful for.

Die turned his head to smile at Boss as he came up to their table. "Hey, I'm really glad you could be here."

"Miss this? Not a chance." Boss reached to give Kyo a one-armed hug, passing him a small silken draw-string bag under the table, whispering in his ear, "Don't open here and for the love of god, don't take it home on the plane." He patted Kyo and moved to Die, hugging him as well before straightening and offering, "Food?"

"Right side and middle tables of the buffet, load it up however you like. And, hey, thank you for offering earlier."

Kyo smiled, leaning into the hug then clasping his hand around the small bag, giving a nod. "Yes, thank you so much..." He discretely slipped the bag into his jacket pocket before looking up again, nodding towards the food. "I am especially interested in the coconut fried tempura, so a bit extra of that would be nice."

Boss grinned at Kyo. "Look at that, you got his attention already, even on the food, Die." He clapped Die on the back and then turned to head off toward the buffet. 

Across the room, Die could see Kyo and Cipher leaning close to one another, sharing a glass of champagne in a sickeningly sweet fashion and Uta watching them with something akin to awe. He nudged Kyo. "Take a look-see at what Uta sees."

Kyo rolled his eyes at Boss then glanced over to where Die was looking. A small laugh bubbled up in his throat as he watched Uta watch Kyo and Cipher. "I forgot to inform him...I guess he's figured it out." 

"It's achingly obvious when they want it to be." Die squeezed Kyo's fingers again.

Meanwhile, at the table, Cipher leaned in and murmured into his Kyo's ear. "I think one of our tablemates has been caught unaware....because he looks like he might piss himself."

Kyo shifted his hand on Cipher's thigh and moved to pick up a handful of rose petals, letting them sift through his fingers onto the table again as he caught Uta's eyes, giving him a smile. "I can think of at least one person who might enjoy that if he did." He didn't let on who he was talking about, but lightly goosed Cipher's leg instead.

Cipher smirked at Uta before jumping a bit as Kyo squeezed his leg. He covered up his sound of surprise with a cough then turned, tweaking Kyo's side. "Shush...," he responded with a grin.

Kyo leaned in and flicked his glance toward Die and Kyo's table. "Okay... maybe two, not sure if he likes it just because his love-dove does or in his own right. Doesn't much matter," He patted Cipher's leg and eased back in his chair, his gaze now on the happy couple. "They needed this."

Cipher hummed thoughtfully, taking a sip of their champagne. "I believe he's acquired the taste..." He shifted, stroking his hand fondly over Kyo's back, smiling. "Yeah, they did...just like we needed our little ceremony all those years ago..."

Kyo turned his palm over on Cipher's thigh and waited on him to take his hand. Cipher intertwined their fingers, the smile still on his face as he glanced back up at the guests of honor. He was truly happy for them. 

Back at the main table, Boss returned with Die and Kyo's food, settling the plates down in front of them and then offering, "Any other drinks or anything I left out that you'd like?" He knelt beside Die and looked up into their faces, a happy look in his eyes.

Kyo smile softly at Boss, shaking his head slightly. "I'm good for now, thank you."

Die reached to squeeze Boss' shoulder. "Thanks, man... I think we've got it from here. Maybe... tell everyone they can eat?" He grinned and then picked up his fork, glad Boss had noticed he lack of desire to let Kyo's hand go and he'd cut up the meat into smaller pieces before coming back with it.

Kyo picked up his own fork, glancing over at Die for a moment, frowning a bit. "Die...can you eat with your left hand?" It was a silly concern but with their hands currently linked, Die's right hand was trapped within Kyo's left, leaving his husband without the use of it.

"Of course I can." Die stabbed a piece of meat and brought it to his lips, proving his point by taking the delicious piece of beef into his mouth and chewing it, a pleased look crossing his face.

Kyo watched for a moment, finally starting in on his own food once he was satisfied with Die's ability to eat. He started slowly, groaning quietly at the flavor of the beef. It wasn't long before he was blazing quickly through his meal, realizing that he was ravenously hungry.

Die made quite the viable dent in his food in the time that Kyo was tearing through his. Surprisingly, no one bothered them during the time they were eating, though Die got the feeling perhaps someone had told everyone to leave them alone until they were done. "I'm glad it's delicious."

Kyo had just stuffed a rather large bite of taro into his mouth when Die spoke. He offered a sound of confirmation, chewing and looking for all the world like a chipmunk.  
Die gave his lover an amused look, quietly taking another bite of his food and then settling back in his chair, stretching his legs out under the table. He supposed it was getting close to the time when they were supposed to schmooze up the people at the party... or at least, he should, if nothing else.

Kyo swallowed his bite and washed it down with a healthy swig from his drink before reaching over and placing his hand on Die's thigh, just squeezing lightly as he looked out over the crowd of their guests.

Die's hand automatically came down to hold onto Kyo's, his fingers lacing between Kyo's own, his palm atop Kyo's hand, keeping it pressed against his thigh. "You know, I should probably go at least go and thank everyone for coming, but I almost want to make an announcement instead, just to get it all done with." Die chuckled. "But they did spent a shitpot full of money to get out here."

Kyo hummed softly, squeezing Die's fingers tightly for a moment. "I feel like it is only proper to go around and thank everyone, speak to everyone personally....as eager as I am to stop being the center of attention..." He glanced up at Die's face then leaned over, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"True enough." Die breathed in through his nose and then let the breath hiss back out between his teeth. "Why on earth am I nervous?"

Kyo let out a soft huff of a laugh, turning his hand over in Die's, squeezing tighter. "Because it's your wedding day?"

"Point." Die took Kyo's hand, lifting it to his lips and pressing a soft kiss to his knuckles. "Cake first and then... the rounds? Or rounds and then cake?"

Kyo licked his lips, glancing out at their guests again. "Rounds...then cake."

Die squeezed Kyo's hand and then let it go, moving to stand up. He straightened his shirt and then re-buttoned his jacket, smoothing it down as well before glancing toward Kyo.

Kyo stood as well, smoothing his own clothing before swiping his hand over his mouth to ensure it was clean. He reached out for Die's hand, holding onto it perhaps a bit too tightly.

Breathing out a quiet little huff of breath, Die laced fingers with Kyo again, taking a step off toward the nearest table, this one containing Kenta, Kaoru, and Toshiya, others who were supposed to be around it all off somewhere else for the time being. Mingling, Die supposed.

Kyo followed Die's lead to the first table where his new brother-in-law and bandmates were sitting, chatting and drinking. He offered them all a small smile as they approached.

Kenta looked up at their approach, a broad smile sweeping over his face, the tilt of his lips and the gentle pull of his cheeks achingly similar to Die's own. "Hey pretty boys, how does it feel to be locked to the same ball and chain?"

Die snorted, reaching out with one arm to sling it over his brother's shoulders before he righted himself and spared a grin for Toshiya and Kaoru as well. "Feels like it was about damn time, that's what."

Toshiya reached out for Die's hand, letting out a laugh. He was grinning widely, a few drinks in his system making him rather happy at the moment. "So does this mean you can finally bed him?" He laughed at his own joke, giving Kyo an exaggerated wink. 

Kyo rolled his eyes at being called a pretty boy but smiled right after, opening his mouth to respond when Toshiya began talking. He snorted and picked up a cashew, tossing it at their bassist. "Very funny, Totchi..."

"Oh please... we all know I'm such a whore I had him already a million times." Die let his grin turn a little dirty, glancing at his brother who groaned and gave Die an exaggerated horrified look. "I didn't need to know!"

Toshiya cackled, picking the cashew out of his hair where it'd landed and flicking it onto the table. He glanced over at Kaoru for half a second before looking back to Die and Kyo again. "Seriously though, I'm happy for you two..." 

Kyo looked at Die then Kenta, huffing out a laugh before turning to Toshiya, reaching out with his free hand to clasp the bassist's. "Thanks...and thank you, all of you, for being here."

Die reached to tug a lock of his brother's hair, leaning down to whisper in his ear. "You mean like I needed to know what you did for five years? My room backed up against yours. No chance in hell you're getting out of it, pretty boy." He ruffled his hair and straightened, moving to Kaoru and holding out his arms. "C'mon Mister Quiet Pants... that smirk on your face says you're happy for us, but your silence says you're lacking a hug."

Kaoru chuckled, shifting into Die's hug, giving him a good clap on the back before he glanced at Kyo, seeing what he wanted to do. "I am happy for you... or one would hope I wouldn't be here."

Kyo missed Die's murmured words to his brother, moving over with him to Kaoru. He gave their band leader a smile and leaned in for a brief hug. "Thank you, Kaoru. Your approval does mean a lot..."

Kaoru squeezed Kyo back, his voice soft against his ear. "You don't need my seal of approval; you never did. I'm only sorry I was an asshole to start with, because now I can see it clear as day... you two are made for each other. Your lives complete one another, and I'd never wish anything but your fulfillment."

Kyo brought his hand up to squeeze Kaoru's shoulder tightly, smiling softly. "The past is the past; you seem to have found your own path towards fulfillment. I hope you find as much happiness as I have."

"We, as a whole, are truly blessed," Kaoru offered quietly, disengaging from Kyo and giving Die, a smile that seemed on the verge of tears. 

Kyo leaned back, emotions shining in his eyes, his hand squeezing rather tightly around Die's. He gave a nod then shifted slightly so as to not be in the way. 

Die leaned over to grab Toshiya's hand, squeezing it and grinning. "I hope you enjoy the room I suggested."

Toshiya clasped Die's hand, smirking. "Yes, yes I do....thank you."

Die drew away from Toshiya, pushing his hair back behind his ear and glancing toward the next table, finding Shinya and Kuroo sitting, perhaps, unusually close to one another, discussing something Shinya was drawing out on paper. Moto and Zenji sat across from them, animatedly talking loudly enough Die could hear the discussion from where he stood.

Kyo followed Die's gaze, turning to nod at the others at the table before taking a step in the direction of the next one. "Shall we carry on?"

Die looped his arm through Kyo's own, grinning as they proceeded toward the next table, Die tossing back a cheerful, "Later boys!"

Kyo smiled, heading off towards the next table with Die, once again steeling his nerves, though he wasn't sure why. It wasn't like they were greeting their parents, yet.

Zenji stood up instantly, clapping Die hard on the back and reaching to shake Kyo's hand. "Look at you! And look at this! It's elegant."

"And beautiful," Kuroo piped up, having looked up from what Shinya was showing him.

Shinya looked up as well, giving a soft smile to the happy couple. "I have to admit that this is exactly how I imagined you'd decorate, although I'm not sure I thought it would be so elegant." He chuckled softly, reaching out to stroke his finger over one of the votives as if to make a point.

Die actually managed a small amount of a flush at the compliments as he returned Zenji's hug. "I have my secret ways. Seriously, did any you think with how I dress that I'd have managed anything less than elegant?" The look on his face and the tone of his voice made it clear he was teasing.

Kyo accepted a quick one-armed hug from Zenji and a fond handshake from Kuroo. He waited until Shinya extended his hand, taking it and squeezing it gently, a soft smile on his face. 

"All of this is truly his masterpiece. I only offered up one or two suggestions and gave my approval of the final designs. Other than that, I let him take the term ‘Bridezilla’ and run with it."

"Hey... I wasn't mean." Die nudged Kyo, leaning his hands on the back of Kuroo's chair for the moment. "Seriously though, I'm glad it's coming across as elegant."

Kyo snorted, shaking his head. "No, but you were definitely _involved_ with it." He smiled then, his hand ghosting over Die's back. 

Shinya gave his own laugh then nodded. "It truly does, to be honest. It is very much a mix of the two of you."

"Sorry to be brief, but... you know... mingling and all that required stuff." Die flashed a smile at the group and put his hand on Kyo's back, gently attempting to steer him toward the next table. "Thanks for coming!"

Kyo offered the table a quick bow then carried on with Die to the next group of people they had to greet. As they walked, he slid his arm around Die's waist, resting his hand on his hip.

Kyo and Cipher sat across from Suigzo and Uta, all of them animatedly chattering about something that came to an abrupt halt as Die and Kyo approached, replaced by a rousing cheer of, "Hey! It's the happy couple!"

As Die and Kyo approached, Cipher stood up, going to pull both of them into a crushing hug. "You two look perfect together. Amazing...and amazing food, too!" He grinned, moving out of the way to let them breath and anyone else greet them.

Die hugged Cipher back, patting him on the back and then moving to do the same to Kyo. When he turned around, Sugizo was waiting to hug him as well, taking him warmly in both arms and holding on tight. "Beautiful ceremony, I mean that."

Kyo squeezed Cipher back then hugged the elder Kyo as well, smiling. He then moved to receive a huge hug from Sugizo, patting the other's back a couple of times. "Thank you, so much."

Die stepped back a bit, right up against Cipher. Sputtering out a muttered apology, Die ducked his head and scrambled to get out from in between everyone, finally settling on the fringes of their little group reunion. "Ah..." he pushed his hand through his hair again, this time doing it a few times before letting his hand drop to his side.

Cipher let out a soft snort as Die got flustered. He shifted and looped an arm around the younger's waist, leaning into speak into his ear. "You are, by far, the most adorable thing when you're flustered, Die." He chuckled, shifting away though not releasing Die yet. 

Meanwhile, Kyo had stepped over to shake Uta's hand, smiling at him. "I know it was difficult to arrange your schedule to come, so thank you very much for doing so." 

Uta grinned widely, bobbing his head. "It is all my pleasure. I wouldn't have missed this for the world."

Die's breath caught a little at Cipher's touch. No matter how many times it happened, he still never got to a point where it wasn't astounding to him. He made a little strangled sound and then did his level best to bite back the embarrassed grin trying to escape. 

His eyes tracked Kyo and Uta's conversation, even as he leaned more against Cipher, the other's touch always welcome, a certain warmth to the other that invited him into his personal space, something Die still struggled with for most of the population.

The older guitarist allowed Die to lean in closer, pulling him another fraction of an inch into his hold. "Relax, Daisuke. You're doing a wonderful job of handling things. Especially since your _husband_ is less than okay with social situations that don't involve the stage."

Die took in a deep breath and slowly let it back out, closing his eyes for a second before nodding. "Yeah..." It was more of a reaction that he knew he was doing okay, though he definitely did need to unwind a bit. "Bad case of the nerves all day today." He shifted his glance to Cipher, finding peace in him for a moment and before he could stop the words, he breathed them out, barely audible to anyone else but Cipher and himself, maybe Kyo if he was listening hard enough. "I get a little... off... when I lay off the alcohol for too long." Even as he spoke the words, he realized it was something he needed to do, needed to share with more than just Kyo alone. And that maybe someone he cared so much about knowing his secret without being the singular steady force in his life... would somehow help in the long run.

Kyo and Uta remained engaged in conversation, the vocalist keeping it up on the pretense of wanting to discuss future Sukekiyo projects. He knew though, that Die needed the moment of solace with Cipher. Not that he thought he wasn't enough, but that it was important to have support from multiple angles. Aside from that, discussing Sukekiyo took his mind away from his own nerves. 

Cipher gave another nod, his hold tightening around Die's waist just that much more. "You're not alone in that, I can promise you that much." He glanced to his own Kyo then back to Die's face, studying him for a few moments. "It's been a good decade, but we've been down that road before."

Die lifted his eyes to Cipher's face, something loosening in his chest at the other's words. Not alone... and maybe... just maybe he had someone to ask how to handle it once they got back from their vacation. He relaxed into Cipher's hold, a tentative little smile pulling at the corner of his lips. "Can we all talk when we get back? Maybe?"

Cipher smiled softly, shifting his hold and hugging Die tightly. "Absolutely. Any time you need to, I'm here." He released Die enough so that the other could step away if he was ready. "Now, go, finish greeting your guests, and then get out of here. I'm not sure how you haven't ravaged him on the nearest table." He grinned then, poking his tongue out of the corner of his mouth.

Die actually laughed, grinning at Cipher and then reaching to ruffle his lover's hair, hoping to distract him from his conversation effectively. "Oh, come on... I have _some_ restraint. Granted, not much, but enough."

Uta paused mid-sentence when Die ruffled Kyo's hair, a perplex look on his face for a moment before he laughed. "I'll take that as my cue to shut the hell up and stop talking shop." He nodded to Kyo and offered a handshake to Die. "See you guys on the flipside; there's some lovely strawberry shortcake and champagne calling my name over at the dessert table." He stood, waving as he headed off. 

Kyo was startled by the hair ruffling but he looked up, catching Die's statement to Cipher before snorting quietly. "Today, and today only, you have restraint...."

"Hey! I've had it for a few weeks now." Die smirked then, padding past Kyo and accepting another handshake from Sugizo on his way past. "Thank you, everyone for coming!"

Kyo chuckled then turned to bow to Sugizo, clasping his shoulder before turning and heading off to the final, and perhaps most difficult table.

Die pulled Kyo close to his side as he approached the table, making sure it was more from the angle of his parent's side than Kyo's own. Despite how well things had been going with Kyo's family, Die knew there were still odd feelings harbored on all sides, and he strived his best to ensure they didn't get at one another's throats.

His mother stood, hurriedly coming to hug her son and press a kiss to his cheek. "Darling! I'm so proud of you." She turned to Kyo, clasping her hands in front of her, looking like she wanted to hug him, but knowing she shouldn't put herself in his space without permission. "My Die couldn't have chosen a better person."

Die's choice of direction eased Kyo's suddenly frazzled nerves to a point, allowing him to offer everyone at the table a small smile. When Die's mother approached him, he flushed at her words then reached out, pulling her into the hug he knew she wanted. "Thank you, so very much...you cannot know how much that means to me."

Moe hugged Kyo back with impressive strength before she retreated from his zone, glancing to her son for approval. Kyo's smile grew as Die's mother hugged him so tightly, warmth blooming in his chest at her absolute acceptance. He shook his father-in-law's hand firmly then turned to his own family. "Thank you for being here...it truly does mean the world to me, to us." 

Die gave her a bright smile as he leaned over to give his father a one-armed hug, looking across the table toward Kyo's parents and sister. "It means the world that you're all here." His gaze came to Inoue, and he let a grin come over his lips, moving slightly to his side to speak with him. "Seems we're not going to have to hide a thing now, hmm?"

Inoue peered up at Die and Kyo, stress etched onto the edges of his face. "You know this is going to cost me a hell of a lot of trouble with fans and publicity, don't you?" He gave a near begrudging smile, rolling his eyes. "You always have been a trouble-making pain in my ass." 

Die snorted at Inoue's comment. "Just wouldn't be me if I didn't cause you grief now, would it?"

Kyo's mother stood up after Kyo had spoken and moved to gently hug her son, her touch light. "As long as you have found your true happiness, Tooru, then we are happy." She moved to grasp both of Die's hands, smiling up at him. "You have brought him so much light, thank you."

Die shifted to pay attention to Kana when she came to him, holding her hands back tight in his own. "He's brought me more than I can ever properly explain. If there were ever two people in the world that needed one another to exist together and as individuals... it is he and I."

Kana smiled, just slightly watery, as she patted Die's hands. "I am genuinely happy for you both."

Kyo moved to speak with his father and sister, receiving favorable reactions from both of them. He knew his father was not as accepting, but the very fact that he'd come told Kyo all he needed to know. It was another push in the right direction. 

Die settled with his hip against his mother's chair, his hand on her shoulder as he watched Kyo interact with his family. His mom's arm wound around his legs, holding him close to her side as she dabbed at some tears with a tissue. "My son... all grown up and-"

"Mom," Die couldn't help the grin on his face, "I'm over forty... please. I grew up a long time ago; I just finally got my act together. There's a difference." His eyes met Kyo's and for that instant, Die was sure the Earth stood still. 

He really had gotten his act together. He'd cleaned up in a hell of a lot of ways, and he'd been lucky enough to find someone who loved and supported him at every twist and turn, someone he'd go to any length to do the same for, and there was nothing in the entire world that Die was more thankful for. 

Untangling himself from his mother, he made his way over to Kyo, pulling him into his arms, ignoring the conversation he'd interrupted completely. Cupping his cheek, Die leaned down and gave him the softest of kisses, breathing out against his lips, "I'll love you to the ends of this Earth." He didn't give him a chance to reply – kissing him with everything that he felt inside – everything he knew what he would have said if he'd felt the need to put it into words. Every ounce of passion, every single bit of love coming through in it, shared entirely between them and it warmed him like nothing else ever had.

With Kyo, he would forever be the happiest man to ever live.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy SHIT, guys! We made it! 92 freaking chapters and a whole heck of a lot of words and some of you managed to make this whole trip with us! Thanks for sticking it out and I hope you're all here for sappy endings and beautiful things, because that's how these two will always be. ♥


End file.
